I'm Sorry, I Haven't a Prog

[The Legendary Shark]

Balding old Captain Jean Luc,
Had a todger shaped quite like a hook,
"I can straighten it out!"
Was Beverly's shout,
But she couldn't and buggered her nook.

[The Legendary Shark]

Space station Captain Ben Sisko,
Decided to open a disco,
The DJ was Morn,
The doorman a gorn,
In the Starfleet latrine, San Francisco.

[The Legendary Shark]

Whilst browsing Defiant's data base,
Empress Sato found something quite ace,
Like the rest of her crew,
You'll like it too,
Just point your mouse at  this place!

[The Legendary Shark]

Okay, I think we can count this as an Irrevocable Breakdown, so well done to the teams.

The scores have reached an extremely interesting stage and so, in an effort to counteract such a thing, how about announcements for late arrivals the Command Centre Ball? To kick off -

Pray sprinkle salt onto your dampened napkins and welcome Mr and Mrs Twars and their daughter, Ann.

Reel it in and welcome Mr and Mrs Raldisle and their daughter, Emma.

Hold onto your valuables as we welcome Mr and Mrs Culback and their son, Ste.

[The Legendary Shark]

Please be upstanding and mind your heads for Mr and Mrs Goprime and their adventurous son, Indy.

[The Legendary Shark]

Ladies and gentlemen, kindly cower behind the furniture and welcome Mr and Mrs Seawarriors and their daughter, Abbey.

[Proudhuff]

Pray be upstanding for Mrs Mills and her son.... no, er, that not how it works is it?

[The Legendary Shark]

32 points for trying but minus 58 for content, which puts you in a virtually unassailable lead.

[Frank]

All the way from France, please be upstanding for her honour, Judge Delors, and her Israeli husband, Chaim

Representing the Danish Kingdom, Ambassador Whett, accompanied by her son, Gert

And in a change to our schedule, welcome newsagents Anne Orbit & Everett Monday

[The Legendary Shark]

[sfx] Audience applause. [/sfx]

[The Legendary Shark]

Pray don your complementary helmets and kneepads as I present to you, from Ireland, Mr and Mrs O'Citywun and their rather rough daughter, Meg - accompanied by her cur, Sturth.

[TordelBack]

With negative scores like this, it's no wonder Samantha has to amuse herself by constantly rubbing them out. 


(Flippin' great link there BTW, Sharky!)

[The Legendary Shark]

Samantha has been aiding me with this thread, being more than happy to share her tips and give me a helping hand behind the scenes, doing her best to make each post stand out and deftly ensuring all our games achieve a happy ending.

(It's a good link, innit? Jack's good but Humph will never be beat. It's also a joy listening to the likes of Willie Rushton again after far too many years.)

[The Legendary Shark]

All the way from Africa, Mr and Mrs Zintuthefistofdredd and their daughter, Gay.

(Well, if you won't post your own I'm afraid this is the standard you're going to get.)

[The Legendary Shark]

Swallow your rad-pills now and welcome, from the Cursed Earth, Mr and Mrs Gwalk and their retiring son, Lon.