Our Scottish squaxx on Burns Night

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

Great Chieftain o' the puddin' race...

I once saw a Scottish comedian (whose name escapes me) recite this poem before telling us about the time he tried to have it translated to German. Apparently the best approximation of the above line was "Grand Fuhrer of the Sausage People"

[The Enigmatic Dr X]

I know a chap who took a Haggis to Singapore, where he was to address the beastie at an ex-pat dinner.

Things took a turn for the worse when, upon arriving, he was asked what the stuff was inside the tin-foil.

"Haggis," says our man.

"Hasish?!" screams the the customs guy, frantically waving over a heavily armed guard.

Our hero is taken away, strip searched and is being marched to jail. He and his captors, all pointing guns at him, pass an officer strolling in the opposite direction down the corridor.

"Ah, a haggis," says the officer in perfect English, while eyeing the evidence. "I was just thinking that it was Burns Night."

Our hero begs to be freed. The officer tastes the offending beastie, proclaims it safe (well, safe-ish, as we're talking haggis here), and arranges for our hero to be released. Turns out, the officer went to Sandhurst and Oxford and knew all about Burns Night from there.

In fact, the officer was supposed to be at the same Burns Supper that our hero was to attend - which is why he could vouch for the story.

And that, folks, is an entirely true story.

[GordonR]

Direct German word for chieftain - Hauptling.

Likely chances this story is mince - 100%

[Tombo]

It was Fred MacAulay on an episode of Q.I.  Video

[The Enigmatic Dr X]

Bah. I believed him.

[Ghost MacRoth]

Translated on google, you get ''große Häuptling des Pudding -Rennen''.  Guess "Grand Fuhrer of the Sausage People" is just funnier!

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

Direct German word for chieftain - Hauptling.

Likely chances this story is mince - 100%

Aye? Well you shouldn't let the truth get in the way of a good story

[I, Cosh]

Rennen is the sort of race you run rather than the sort you exterminate.

[ZenArcade]

Think it's rassen or something like that. Rennenis something you would find in a sheep's stomach....or is that rennet? Z

[Ghost MacRoth]

Rennen is the sort of race you run rather than the sort you exterminate.

Tell it tae google!

[ZenArcade]

I'm fairly sure it's rasse. Does anyone speak German? Z

[M.I.K.]

If ah micht pluy the de'il's advocate...

A direct translation of the poem would not necessarily be the words used if you wanted it to rhyme.

[Tiplodocus]

It's going to be on Thursday night for us. Veggie haggis, mash and carrots (can't convince anyone to do neeps). Trying to concoct a mushroomy whisky sauce for it.

[JPMaybe]

"große Häuptling der Wurstrasse" works, according to my German mate who I was bored enough to ask, if you go with sausage=pudding.

[Rog69]

I'm working in Scotland this week and I had Haggis for the first time today and really liked it. The baked beans from my breakfast had run into it a little which may have changed the flavor a bit though.