Judge Dredd vs. Invincible vs. Savage Dragon vs. Buffy vs. Scott Pilgrim... tale

[PsychoGoatee]

Wasn't sure where to post this, but since it's pretty much fan-fiction I figured it'd go in here.

Invincible vs. Judge Dredd vs. Savage Dragon vs. Buffy (the Vampire Slayer) vs. Hellboy vs. Snake Eyes (GI Joe) vs. Michelangelo (TMNT) vs. Scott Pilgrim vs. Conan vs. Rick Grimes (Walking Dead) vs. Cassie (Hack/Slash) vs. Superpatriot.

A twelve-way rumble, a battle to the death. Here's how I think it could go...

Invincible is having a slugfest with Dragon. Fatigued after landing a big punch, Invincible gets hit by Scott Pilgrim's lightsaber of love, and is reduced to a pile of coins. Then Rick Grimes shoots Scott Pilgrim in the head and Pilgrim is dead. Judge Dredd stabs Rick in the heart with his boot-knife, Rick is down.

Snake Eyes is having a glorious fight with Michelangelo, he cuts off one of Michelangelo's arms but Mikey keeps rockin'. Conan splits Snake's head open with a battle-axe from behind killing him, and after some back-and-forth Hellboy punches through Conan's head.

While that was going on Buffy fights Cassie, who stabs Buffy in the ribs a couple times before being staked in the chest with the stake end of Buffy's uber-scythe.

Dredd goes to shoot Mikey but he knocks the lawgiver gun out of Dredd's hand ("Drokk!"), and cracks Dredd's visor with a nunchaku. Dredd uppercuts Mikey in the face, rocking him, and tackles him, some back and forth, Dredd again gets his hand to that boot-knife holster and stabs it into Mikey's neck. Mikey down, Dredd retrieves his gun.

Meanwhile Buffy has been duking it out with Hellboy, she manages to get a good upward swing in, from the groin up cutting Hellboy in half. "He had to split!"

Dragon, Superpatriot, and Dredd engage in a three-way rumble. Superpatriot blasts Dragon with explosive rounds, and so does Dredd, peppering numerous wounds and a few straight holes through Dragon's body, but he keeps fighting, ripping Dredd's right arm off and beating him down with it. Superpatriot's extended long metal arm nails Dragon in the face, rocking him. Buffy jumps in and cuts that arm off with her uber-scythe, then does a spinkick to Patriot's head, dizzying him a bit.

From the ground Dredd fires a high-explosive round directly at Buffy's head, he doesn't miss.

Patriot aims his guns at Dredd, Dredd rolls but takes numerous bullet hits. Dredd's right arm smacks Patriot in the back of the head, thrown by Dragon. Dragon and Patriot proceed to fight further, Dragon getting heavy punches in, while Patriot continues blasting him with bullets and explosives. Dragon finally manages to rip through Superpatriots neck, rupturing various circuits and putting Patriot down for the count.

Dragon, with large holes throughout his chest and most of his body, gets hit by an incendiary round from Dredd, now Dragon is ablaze. Both men still standing, Dredd switches his lawgiver to high-ex and Dragon's already damaged head is exploded.

Dredd wins.

I put this together for a "rumble" comics subforum, needless to say people disagreed with my proposed series of events and Dredd as the victor. Go Dredd go!

[locustsofdeath!]

after some back-and-forth Hellboy punches through Conan's head.

Conan would smite this entire lot with his pinky toe. I suggest you rethink your story, good sir.

[Dark Jimbo]

I miss Godpleton's death match contests.