Main Menu

Evil AD2000

Started by Smiley, 17 February, 2005, 06:08:33 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Smiley

Right, so you've been yoinked through a mirror (or perhaps your time-machine's shot a bolt, or you went and ate that cheese you found under the cooker) and all of a sudden the world's different. There's totalitarian flags hanging everywhere, everyone's got spiky collars, eyepatches or sneers. And the fast-food place has a McHitler's sign. With a gasp you realise this is an evil alternate universe.

Of course, you immediately search for a copy of the prog to see how bad this world could be. It's got AD 2000 on the front. What's in it? You fall to your knees with a "Nooooo!"

(Your turn now.)

Bolt-01

Help me.... I'm bleeding....

Bolt (shot)

Byron Virgo

I always thought I'd look good in a Luftwaffe uniform...

Trout

It sounds horrible.

I'd be a massive fan of Slaine and SinDex.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The Amstor Computer

...the prog lies on the pavement in front of you, and staring up from the cover is the strapline:

"New in this prog - The Golden Fox Rebellion Strikes Back!"

As the pages flap in the breeze, you catch a glimpse of episode 22 of the epic "Judge Dredd: Irish Eyes" by Garth Ennis, and a quick flash of Shakara Book II by Michael Fleischer & Shaky Kane.

But wait, what's that at the back of the prog? Oh, God it can't be...

Trout

Yes, it is - it's B.L.A.I.R. 1's visit to Chronos Carnival!

Byron Virgo

Actually, I'd quite like to see Shaky Kane do Shakara...


...I'll get me coat.

Funtwangle

all the strips have main characters who are girls

judge justine dredd
slainess
rogue majorette
synamon
strontium bitch

they are all doing makeup and talking about their feelings

Slippery PD

Rather than featuring Judge Dredd, its major strip is now Dead Meat.  Featuring Inspector Raam....

Slips

Bolt-01

Judge Dredd is still the lead strip, but now he is a beurocrat (sp?) who spends his time tracing the fradulent insurance claims of the citizens of Mega-strasse-one.

Strontium Dog is the story examining the heroic exploits of Johan Alpha, head of the radiation purges unit in the wasteland of the USA.

Bolt-01

Krustabi

Millar is writing the whole thing.

And drawing it as well.

Jared Katooie

Turnpig von snagg Earthers!

I am Zrag, dictator of the galaxies most expensive comic! You hold in your scarred and bleeding hands gorp 3212 of Ad 2000. Within every dull and stained page lurk millions of thrill-suckers ready to strike and lower your expectations to acceptable levels. "What lies within these expensive sheets of toilet paper?" I hear you ask? Well SHUT UP, and I'll tell you...

Judge Rico Dredd, Love and money by Carlos Ezquerra (script) and John Wagner (art) part 6: Rico's relationship with Anderson deteriorates after he sells her favourite dress to buy a new hoverbike. Meanwhile Maria and Walter are still lost in the biggest department store in the big meg and hilarity is on the cards!

Bison, Punch me Book 5 part 12 by Mark Millar (script + art) and Shaky Kane (colours): Jack Bison is a man lving on borrowed time! Unless he kisses someone in the next five seconds he'll lose his job! But how can he cope when he finds himself trapped inside the body of an obese black woman? And can he overcome his addiction to chocolate in time to make his sons concert recital?

Junker, The tedium part 23 by Michael Fleischer and : Junker fed up of listening to women whining all the time. All he needs is his gun - and some junk! But when the amazonions of Mysterion 12 sieze all the galaxies junk he's gonna have to think fast to get his paycheck!

Sinister/Dexter The finale part 3 by Dan Abnett (script)and Dan Abnett (art): Their code of honour means they can never refuse a paying job but now they've been hired to kill each other. Again.

Valkyries/Space girls No title by David Bishop and Dan Abnett (script) and Ronan Keating from boyzone (art): The incredibly popular crossover continues! Permanent from next issue!

Now you know. Pick up the meg (with Red razors and big Dave starting this issue) and go away.

Morag Tong!

Zrag.

Trout

Y'know, this thread was merely amusing until the mention of Ronan Keating actually made it disturbing.

Well done, Jared!

Grant Goggans

Wow, my prog?s a real stinker.  It has:

JUDGE DREDD: ?Exxtreme Force? (script: Mark Millar).  It?s a six page story and it has some guy with a big gun and he kills, like, ninety judges.  Then Judge Dredd turns up and one of the dying judges says ?choke? it?s Dredd? he?ll? stop? uggh!? Judge Dredd?s gun is bigger and so Dredd wins.  THE END.

STRONTIUM DOGS: ?Procedures and Possibilities? episode 8 (script: Peter Hogan).  Gronk and Bullmoose walk through the desert, a blind woman warns of ominous signs and portents and the alphabet scientists prepare their nasty plans.  Continues in Book Two.  The Zraggian editor notes, in the output, that this is the Hogan droid?s 100th episode of Strontium Dogs.

MANIAC FIVE: ?Exxtreme Annihilation? episode 5 (Mark Millar / Steve Yeowell).  Maniac Nineteen has ripped Maniac Five?s arm off and beats him about the head with it before threatening to sodomize him.  Maniac Five punches Maniac Nineteen through a building which crashes down, killing a small child and a puppy.  Maniac Five shouts ?NNNNNNNO!? and Maniac Nineteen stands up to pronounce ?The blood of innocents is on your hands!  This time? you?re finished!?  Concludes next prog.

SPACE GIRLS: ?The New Space? episode 1.  (Bishop & Tomlinson / Jim Balent).  Following the untimely death of her colleagues in the previous adventure, Wide Open Space, in her exciting new costume, recruits four new Space Girls: Basketball Space, Volleyball Space, Football Space and Naked Space.

HARLEM HEROES: Book Ten episode 36 (Fleisher / Siku).  I didn?t read this one.

There?s a note from King Trout in the Input, abdicating his throne and demanding more Friday reprints in the Meg.  He wins an Inspector Raam poster.  What an awful world!

--Grant

Satanist

After picking up a few back issues just to see if Inferno was as bad as everyone said (yes) I cant believe Ive never read people slag...

"Starting in this very special prog with an epic new story...Really & Truly Redux!"
Hmm, just pretend I wrote something witty eh?