Overheard conversation

WoD · 02 May, 2008, 02:43:47 PM

You should have told em where to stick it and then legged across the nearest river...that'd show em!

Richmond Clements · 02 May, 2008, 02:46:44 PM

I actually burst out laughing at them- I thought it was a splendid bit of heckling!

Dan Kelly · 02 May, 2008, 02:49:15 PM

In regard to RACs last comment the other day I was wandering through town wearing my red jacket when some young Chav shouts to his mate - "Hey up - it's Crouchy". Might also have been something to do with my build I s'pose :)

The other week we were getting on the train and this young lad gives a girl a CD, wrapped up in a piece of paper. As we sit down she looks at it, and asks the carriage in general "What does doom mean? Is it like, evil?". She then starts to panic that the CD might be like "offa that film" [meaning we think, the ring].

She then asks the young lad next to us if she should take it to her church and get them to listen to it, or pray over it! She then states that she hasn't been to church in a few weeks - to which the young lad quips that she is "already doomed then"

Finally she tries to pass it to the lad and us, and when we refuse states that "you're scared as well". My answer? "Just more discerning"

House of Usher · 02 May, 2008, 04:11:24 PM

and Crouchy is... Peter Crouch, a football player for Liverpool F.C.?

Back at university, in a different flat shared with other people, we were sitting in the kitchen and winessed the following:

murmuring in the corridor. female flatmate's raised voice expressing displeasure. more murmuring. male flatmate's feeble attempts to placate her. feet stamping up and down the corridor. then comes in the kitchen and puts something in a cupboard before going out again.

HER VOICE: "We never go anywhere, we never do anything fun. I want some excitement in my life!"

she comes back into the kitchen, followed by him. he stands in the doorway looking sheepish.

HE SAYS: "So... do you want to go for that mountain bike ride now then?"

she shouts at him and stamps off back down the corridor and he follows after.

We sat in the kitchen giggling. We knew he'd picked exactly the wrong thing to say to her.

Mike Carroll · 03 May, 2008, 02:09:41 AM

When my old mate Rob was in college he was subjected to months of slagging - mostly fairly crude and lame insults - from a gaggle of girls. Rob's very quick-witted and usually responded in kind, but after a while he realised that he really had to focus on his studies, so he stopped replying quite so frequently to their banter.

One day they were really ganging up on him, but he barely even noticed and didn't respond at all.

And then the worst of the lot said must have mistaken his silence for offence, and tried to back-pedal: "Ah, Rob, you know we're only messin'. We all know you love a good slag."

He looked up from his book and said, "Yeah, that's why I'm going out with your mother."

O Lucky Stevie! · 03 May, 2008, 08:12:25 AM

+the young lady cried out Oh Stevie, Stevie - why can't it always be like this!?" to which he replied Me name's not Stevie, it's Clive."

um... best be getting me coat then, shall i?

Peter Wolf · 03 May, 2008, 02:52:57 PM

I was on a train once and a woman and a little kid got on and sat on the next seat and then the woman said to the little kid "Mind that woman/girl" referring to me.

?

Something to do with the way i looked at the time[about 18] .I dont know if it was because i had an androgynous look i really dont know but i seem to fit the description of male.

The other thing is being asked if i am queer or whatever.Again i dont know as i am not gay or camp and dont sound gay or have a gay appearence.This hasnt happened for a long time .

My usual reply would be "Why are you on the pull then ?"

I had a scuffle in the street with 6 Chavs in the street once because one of them shouted out "Ere mate are you F****** queer ?"Being not in the best of moods at that time i had to sort them out as i didnt like being insulted in the street .

After sorting them out one of them [the oldest] said "Why do av a go a us we didnt do nuffing !?"

worldshown · 03 May, 2008, 04:29:41 PM

I think I might have the worst one for public heckling.

When I was in University (mid-90s) I had collar length, dark, wavy hair. I still wore glasses and was several pasties overweight.

A group of young teens walked past me on the main road and one of them shouted "Hey lads, it's Danny Baker!"

Then, when my hair grew long enough to tie back, no more Danny Baker abuse.

I got Penn Jillette abuse instead.

scutfink · 03 May, 2008, 05:49:30 PM

back in my scruffy unshaven student days, queuing in the bank, a young mother (not chavish young, but early thirties) was sttod a few places behind me.

After a while, her toddler son asks: 'Mummy, why's that lady got a beard?'

the look of shock and horror on her face was soooo priceless I just creased up laughing...

Peter Wolf · 03 May, 2008, 11:27:22 PM

"Oi Blondie !"

Street heckling Chavs every so often.

Yes Yes heard it all before and i still feel like throttling them.

In the local take away kebeb joint having ordering and paying for what turned out to be the worst take away i have *ever* had and in walked in 2 mentally retarded adult chav lowlife types who just start saying "I wan u chueezburger - I wan u taykuway !".

The guy behind the counter "Just wait a second as there are other customers waiting"

Chav Retard says " UUUUUuuurr.... F****** ate vis place you C**** !" and says to the other "I goin bak over ve pub and call moi mate yoo cumin ova ?"

Thats the last time i ever go in that place as its always the same.

I was having problems with a gang of chav teenagers on the beach as i was being targetted by them for a short while.

In the end i had an altercation with them and one of them said "We dont want you in our area " in a voice and accent that sounded just like Ali G.

Stupid kids.

A bunch of irritating student types in the pub on sunday lunchtime.I was on the next table to them and had to listen to them trotting out cliche after cliche like "I cant remember anything from last night !!?? " and their sordid retelling of last nights activities with a prostitute or stripper out loud so the whole pub could hear.Something to do with chocolate IIRC.

Tiresome to listen to and probably bullshit.

House of Usher · 04 May, 2008, 12:33:53 PM

Blimey, it's like reading The Punisher's War Journal! I'm glad I just don't go out.

TordelBack · 04 May, 2008, 12:53:34 PM

Blimey, it's like reading The Punisher's War Journal!

Coffee everywhere now,

Satanist · 06 May, 2008, 07:58:38 AM

Sat at the bus stop this morning reading my trashy horror a couple stood next to me. The man was dressed way too young and the woman who had her back to me was wearing denim shorts and a cut off top. It was the voices I noticed, the man was very effeminate and the woman sounded like a 40 year old male trucker which surprised me. I just had to get a sneaky peek and sure enough it was a 40 year old trucker dressed like a laydee, in Govanhill, at 6.30 am!

Her name was Russell (not really but name that song)