Main Menu

Life Spugs because...

Started by Dog Deever, 04 March, 2009, 08:00:25 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

SmallBlueThing

...although I was incredibly excited to receive my Dan Francisco/ Mutie Scum badges in the post today, I was less than pleased to immediately sustain multiple injuries getting them out of the envelope! Both safety pins were left open and I stabbed myself twice (okay, perhaps not "multiple", but who cares) on them.

I now haz hurty fingers.  :(

Steev
.

Kerrin

Widdums. Come on man, toughen the funt up! Pain is a mere sensation. I laugh in face of badge pins, ha-ha-ha. You don't want Mr.T throwing Snickers bars at you, do you, well do you? Grrrrrr! Man up hombre.

God it's a miserable day out there. I think I'll settle down to making a start on next months art comp with a nice cold beer. Not all bad then.

Peter Wolf

Worthing Bazaar - A fete worse than death

SmallBlueThing

You say that- but what would have happened if it'd been a full, overhead mask with badges for eyes? Eh, did you think of THAT? I would have immediately put it on and stabbed myself in the eyeballs! Hooked my eyeballs on the safety pins and pulled them, punctured, pussing and leaking yellow ichor, out of my gaping sockets while screaming in agony. That's what would have happened! Then, the eyeballs would have still been attached to both the mask and my head, via their stretched and raw optic nerves, and I'd've somehow had to work my hand up inside the mask, unhook them, get the mask off and slip them back into my skull before going to the hospital.

And that would not have been zarjaz.

Steev
.

Kerrin


SuperSurfer

Quote from: SpookyTheCat on 01 August, 2009, 04:54:46 PM
...although I was incredibly excited to receive my Dan Francisco/ Mutie Scum badges in the post today, I was less than pleased to immediately sustain multiple injuries getting them out of the envelope! Both safety pins were left open and I stabbed myself twice (okay, perhaps not "multiple", but who cares) on them.

I now haz hurty fingers.  :(

Steev
Thats nothing. I once opened an envelope from a graduate who sent his cv looking for work experience. I stuck my fingers in the envelope and got stabbed by a fish hook attached to fishing tackle. He was trying to be creative and his covering letter had a load of tosh about him being the "right catch". I thought, ok joke over and went to take the cv out and got jabbed by a second hook. Good one. Needless to say he didn't get a placement at that company. The moral is: job seekers, don't stab any prospective employers.

House of Usher

What on earth was the post he was applying for? You don't work for John West salmon, do you?
STRIKE !!!

SuperSurfer

Ha ha. No, it was in a Dutch graphic design company years ago. And the fish hook sending graduate was German. Wartime animosity, perhaps? As a Dutch person once said to me "the war will truly be over when a Dutch man calls his son Adolf". Actually, it was just a case of creativity gone wrong. Dutch design companies were very good at helping out students and graduates and many companies always had a junior or two there doing a placement. As graphics in the Netherlands is pretty hot they would get applications from all over the world.  

Roger Godpleton

Two tragic losses for the world of music.

1). The Pussycat Dolls have split.
2). Paul McCartney ain't touring no more.
He's only trying to be what following how his dreams make you wanna be, man!

Jim_Campbell

The stupid fucking c*nts that live next door, not content with trying to learn scales on an electric guitar have managed to set off both the burglar and fire alarm simultaneously.

The Fire Brigade have now departed -- there apparently not actually being a fire -- leaving these alarms still blaring and the c*nts having no clue how to stop them.

It's so bad, I'm actually contemplating booking into a hotel for the night.

Jim
Stupidly Busy Letterer: Samples. | Blog
Less-Awesome-Artist: Scribbles.

Peter Wolf


Cant you go nextdoor and talk to these idiots and find the control panels to the alarms ?

Its quite simple to switch these things off by resetting them .

Thats what i would do anyway.
Worthing Bazaar - A fete worse than death

SmallBlueThing

'Silence' then 'reset'. If that doesn't work, turn the key to the other position, and try again. Or push it in really hard, becasue there's always a little spring that pushes it back out again. Or is that not funny in this context?  ;)

Steev
.

Jim_Campbell

Quote from: peterwolf on 03 August, 2009, 06:45:46 PM

Cant you go nextdoor and talk to these idiots and find the control panels to the alarms ?


My cats speak better English than my neighbours.

Cheers

Jim
Stupidly Busy Letterer: Samples. | Blog
Less-Awesome-Artist: Scribbles.

Dandontdare

I got back from my distinctly second-rate festival experience last night and ever since I've been puking up and shitting water - seriously guys, I've had the runs before but this is extreme - I drink a glass of water and half an hour later a glassful of extremely stinky water just falls out the other end. And I've also found I can't trust my arse if it feels like it wants to fart.

The only lucky point is that we decided to come home a day early, so I'm feeling like death on my own sofa rather than in the back of as crammed car with a hyperactive 10 year old for a four hour drive.

Peter Wolf

Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 03 August, 2009, 07:28:17 PM
Quote from: peterwolf on 03 August, 2009, 06:45:46 PM

Cant you go nextdoor and talk to these idiots and find the control panels to the alarms ?


My cats speak better English than my neighbours.

Cheers

Jim

Are they foreign or ignorant or inarticulate or inconsiderate or all of those things ?

Are they deaf as well ?
Worthing Bazaar - A fete worse than death