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Author Topic: Stupid things people have actually said to you.  (Read 147799 times)

paddykafka

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1335 on: 11 October, 2014, 04:01:38 pm »
Not quite said directly to me but as related by a guy I know: He and a friend are discussing the current Ebola situation. His friend announces - in very strident and admiring tones - that there was a headline in a newspaper, about how rock band "The Who" are in Africa trying to assist the people suffering so terribly over there.

Needless to say, "The Who" in question was the World Health Organisation.

Hawkmumbler

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1336 on: 11 October, 2014, 06:04:09 pm »
Diving student today.

"I can't! Everytime I breath out it flood my mask!"

"....Are you breathing out throug your nose?"

"Yeah!"

"Well thats why!"

TordelBack

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1337 on: 11 October, 2014, 06:13:05 pm »
Needless to say, "The Who" in question was the World Health Organisation.

That's quite beautiful.  I hear he's on First too.

NapalmKev

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1338 on: 11 March, 2015, 11:30:08 am »
"When you eat food the World gets Heavier!"

Yeah, right. Hard-core knowledge straight from a bottle of Cider.

Cheers
"Countless opinions... A hotbed of Riches!"

Rog69

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1339 on: 11 March, 2015, 05:04:11 pm »
I recieved an email from one of our sales team today that started -

Quote
Hi Roger

Hopefully you have this by now – if not, look in junk mail.

 :crazy:

ZenArcade

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1340 on: 11 March, 2015, 06:06:20 pm »
Napamkev and Rog69....mind boggling! Z
Ed is dead, baby Ed is...Ed is dead

Funt Solo

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1341 on: 05 February, 2019, 08:16:21 pm »
In an email: 

Quote
The UPS (Uninterruptable Power Supply) went down...
fate amenable to change

Heath C Ackley

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1342 on: 06 February, 2019, 02:31:16 pm »
I once overheard a conversation between an infant son his Mum and Dad at Paignton Zoo:

BOY points to large spotted predator in its enclosure.
'What is it?'

MUM: 'I dunno. Let's ask Daddy.'

DAD reads sign on wall.

'Its a cheetah.'

MUM: 'What's a cheetah?'

DAD: 'I dunno.'
 
 :o
"Give a man a mask and he will give you the truth."

DaveGYNWA

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1343 on: 06 February, 2019, 04:06:48 pm »
A work colleague struggling to remember the name of something comes up with the following:

"What do they call those boats that float?"

The answer he wanted to hear was 'Hovercraft' but the answer he got was "That would be a boat"

Proudhuff

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1344 on: 08 February, 2019, 04:35:11 pm »
I once overheard a conversation between an infant son his Mum and Dad at Paignton Zoo:

BOY points to large spotted predator in its enclosure.
'What is it?'

MUM: 'I dunno. Let's ask Daddy.'

DAD reads sign on wall.

'Its a cheetah.'

MUM: 'What's a cheetah?'

DAD: 'I dunno.'
 
 :o

One for the Darwin awards...
But everybody else is overwhelmed by indifference and the promise of an early bed

Proudhuff

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1345 on: 08 February, 2019, 04:36:27 pm »
'Mary Queen of Scots last letter, is that a recent thing?'   :think:
But everybody else is overwhelmed by indifference and the promise of an early bed

sheridan

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1346 on: 09 February, 2019, 01:06:17 am »
I once overheard a conversation between an infant son his Mum and Dad at Paignton Zoo:

BOY points to large spotted predator in its enclosure.
'What is it?'

MUM: 'I dunno. Let's ask Daddy.'

DAD reads sign on wall.

'Its a cheetah.'

MUM: 'What's a cheetah?'

DAD: 'I dunno.'
 
 :o

One for the Darwin awards...

Nah - you've got to get yourself killed before breeding to properly qualify for the Darwins*







*taken literally, anyway...

Rackle

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1347 on: 09 February, 2019, 02:43:04 pm »
About five or six years ago, I was working for an advertising company as a data analyst (I know, shame on me) and a member of IT needed to get in contact with me but emails kept bouncing when he tried to email me.  You'd think if someone's working in IT they'd know how to use the global address book if the email is bouncing at the instant they try to send it to me.

I get a call from said IT Bod and he complains he's trying to send an email and I must have done something to my email account. It turns out he just kept mispelling my firstname and the email address format at this place was firstname.surname@company.com

Me: well I am recieving emails from other staff fine - are you sure you are contacting the correct Rachael?
IT Bod: Is your last name <uses my last name>?
Me: yes. Hmmm. What email address are you sending it to?

IT Bod spells out my email address with a typo - basically he missed out the second a in my first name.
Me: Ah that's why. You've missed out a letter. My email address is <insert correct one>
IT Bod: Oh, you spell your name wrong
Me: Oh you sweet summer child, I've been spelling my name this way for over 30 years, it's MY name. I think I know how to spell it!  You could have looked it up in the staff directory  ::)

Thankfully I don't work there any more.
New to the forum & still quite new to 2000AD, but there is a collection of comics older than me in residence.

Tjm86

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1348 on: 09 February, 2019, 02:52:41 pm »
My normal response at that point is "you aren't planning on having kids, are you?" ....

Apestrife

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Re: Stupid things people have actually said to you.
« Reply #1349 on: 09 February, 2019, 04:26:34 pm »
Once upon a time in a math class during a test, a classmate asked out teacher: "How many sides does a dice have?".

Our teacher said she refused to answer that.