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Author Topic: Happy Birthday......  (Read 3568 times)

ThryllSeekyr

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #15 on: 12 December, 2015, 07:57:37 am »
I got one present on my birthday.....


From my dad and........ my brother is busy helping me shift house. I'm finally moving out to live by myself, (So, I guess that can be called a present too!) Yet, the house I'm moving into is going to be sold to some Asian/Japanese/Korean family in anywhere from 3 to 6 months.....

All I can say is that it's a lovely old two-storey house that I going to be more a care-taker of than the occupant.  Kind of like a old Queenslander with the side veranda walled in. So it's not really. I just hate the way houses are being made today. More like compartments or containers than a places to live comfortably. They all have these mostly glass walls with only curtains for privacy and not very roomy at all.

This house, I'm moving into may seem deceptively bigger, but it only has two bed rooms next to each other separating the lounge-room and connecting dining room and the closed in veranda with twin single beds next to each other and adjacent to the main bedroom around the front of the house. The veranda connects to the bathroom and toilet around at the other end around the back. Where it also a joining with the kitchen dining area (Not to be confused with another dining area I mentioned earlier, which one merges with lounge room and are only separated by these twin wooden columns on top of equally twin glass door cabinets filled will a porcelain tea set and other related sculptures. The lounge room is furnished with these three expensive looking antique chairs at almost equally spaced against both walls and placed in such a way that watching the television at the other end of the room would be a comfortable thing to do in them. That television does not work and I will be bringing in my own.

That television is antique as well, one of those that is shaped liked large box made from wood. I don't think they make those any more. As well the antique dining table. It's extendable (In case you want to feed more than four people!) and made from dark wood with matching chairs up to eight or ten. This room adjoins a corner veranda that is a more corner room shaped room that has adjoins a small passage with a door leading back into kitchen around the back of the house. Before you get there. There is a staircase leading to the very large room below which is also a carport that still has a very nice looking with Holden-Commodore  in it. I'd hate to ruin the car by even touching it. It does look barely used. The whole area downstairs is just one big room that used to have a pool table at it's center. It was sold some time before the former occupants passed away. There is or was another television set, much more modern looking than the one upstairs and much smaller. There are some collapsible chairs and deck chairs arranged in varying positions around the box under the long sided veranda I mention earlier. The stairs come down between the walk way to the back door of the house. The washing machine and dryer are up against the wall of the small nook where the workshop table is facing the back of the house from the near middle under the same side of the long veranda. on the other side of the stair and around behind them is a area to hang clothing up to dry when it's wet. Otherwise go out the back door to one of those old fashion umbrella like cloths lines that spin around. (I broke my parents own cloths line by pretending to fly by hanging to one of the spokes while having it spin around.) The grass is a little overgrown and not properly kept with a garden that needs attention in the left and corner around the back. There is barbeque built in a partial enclosure up against the back fence. The yard is only deceptively big, and in reality slightly small than my parents yard right now. The yard is rather open looking as the land the house is built on was large enough have enough room at nearly each side to see around the house (Which is also considerably large!) around to the back if you were just looking while walking along the foot path around the front. So there is no privacy there. Cars can be parked on this strip of land with permission from the owner and there is too gates on this side of the house. The one round the front near the footpath and the one at the back fence which is in straight line down the strip of land from the other one. This one lead to the back paddock which is about one quarter of block in size. Just think the size of six to eight blocks of land if they were each the right size for a normal size house. Some of the land has been taken by a new house built on one side of it. Yet there is still plenty of land back there. Their back or side fence is about one foot foul of the gate that leads into this paddock from  There used to be horses in that paddock from the back and side yard. I'm lead to believe the owner of this house once owned that land and any newer occupant may still do.

There are some trees, small trees around the front of the house behind the front fence. They are small and sparse enough to see right through them to the front of the house. Going back into the large room downstairs. The time through the side door or the car/garage door next to it and closer to the road way. The people sized door itself is roughly centre on that side and when you enter from that one. The retro modern stereo, tape-deck, record play and radio with half metre tall speakers on either side is on my near left along that wall. Further along that wall on the same side is a medium sized fridge also retro modern.

In the center of this room is small retro-modern round table made from plastic with four matching chairs placed at equal spaces around it. At the front of the this room adjacent to road side where the car is parked. Is a area that runs along that side entirely where all the gardening and other miscellaneous  equipment is kept. Also well as the lawn mower and stuff that might otherwise classified as broken and /or garbage. All this is behind a mere curtain and this is what I don't like. If people have access to this house, they could  here and sneak up on me while I'm at the work shop table or watching television downstairs. All I know otherwise Real-Estate people will be constantly bother me, making visits and doing inspections and their the people I don't like much. They tend to be slimy and untrustworthy and I wouldn't put it past them to hide inside the house and murder me when I'm least aware.

About the stairs and going back up them. They have one of those electrical stair climber contraptions with a chair built in. Right now it, upstairs and fold up out of my way and I hope I never have to use the thing myself. Otherwise, I'd ask for it to be removed. Yet, my older Brother wants to keep everything as it is......http://forums.2000adonline.com/Smileys/default/rolleyes.gif.

Gong back up these stairs and back into the room that is like closed in veranda  and not actually very veranda shaped at all. Has some chairs along the inside of outer-wall (But on the inside of course!). Just two or three I think, and made from moulded plastic. Retro modern, again. There is glass sliding door between this room and the antique dining room leading merging with the equally antique dining room also leading to small room that might be likened to a lobby that is really small with a table up against the inner-front wall and lots of family photos. The is a door on the right hand side of the house (Not the front!) from this room that opening out to a even smaller landing from where some stairs lead down  to the front. This stairwell is bricked in so no Harry Potter's will be moving in there.

Back to that quarter closed in veranda....and the door way to the kitchen around the back of the house. It has double sink, a fridge, a electric oven, a microwave, with a cupboards lining the back wall when entering through the back door and next to the oven on either side long the side wall back to back with the showeroom (I said it was the bathroom before and there used to be bath there, but it's since been replaced by a large shower that could shower a small group of people at the same time!) and toilet adjacent to the other longer closed in veranda. This cupboard merges with the ones ling the back wall and the one on the other side dividing the kitchen. Just imagine one long cupboard starting from where it divides the kitchen from the small more modern dining area and lining the other two sides and back wall after bending them twice at right angles (Just like Jack Black says on the his first Tenacious D album or DvD and he totally owns that!) The whole kitchen and dining area is so retro-modern compared to the other dining area, lounge and two adjacent bedrooms diving those rooms from the long closed in veranda. Those rooms are very antique and the ceiling of those rooms have these Art-Deco designs sculpted into them. Very antique indeed!

Aside from that there are these soft zippered doors made of some rubbery plastic that between the long closed in veranda and on the door leading from the modern dining area to the antique dining area and also between that very same veranda that shut and keep these rooms air-tight for when the air-conditioner is in use. I do not like this and air-conditioning much myself. Yet it does get hot right now and thankfully it's much cooler downstairs without it. I don't like the idea of air-tight rooms myself either.

There is also a largish water tank around the left and backside of house up against the outside wall. It's a modern looking tank made from some durable plastic substance. It not one of those metal ones, not like the old ones.

That's all In know about it except I will now reveal that the house once belong to my now deceased grand-parents and it's been unoccupied for a few years now.

ThryllSeekyr

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #16 on: 12 December, 2015, 07:57:57 am »
I know the house well, because  I have spent much time sleeping over there as a youngling especially during the days of the local show. Just think it's like a local fair or fare with large rides for the kiddies and young adults like the Merry-Go-Rounds with horses and carriages and other similar rides with kiddy cars and boats connected by spokes to a center wheel and held in water for added realism. The Zipper which is trapezium shaped wheel or squashed wheel shaped object that is spun around like the large Ferris-Wheel (Which was also there, but never ridden by me!) and each container was loosely attached to this squashed wheel and they would be moved along with the chain track that would move like a conveyor belt possibly powered by some sort of motor and each of the container where you sit would spin around individually from where they were attached to squashed wheel. There was also the Chipmunk a small-roller coaster that I only ever rode on once and it was still a wild enough ride that it scared the shit out of me a the time. I was in my late mid-teens when I did that and recall trying to hop out of my car every time it was about to dip or turn a corner.  The dodgem-cars which I tended to dominate in my pre to mid teen years.  They seemed safe and fun. The Haunted-House. Which I never went on, because I was just scaredy-cat. There was also that ride, with the spinning things that sat three people each and they each were three to a [late that would spinning as well, and while being swung from side to side and sometime back and forward from a large metal pole that the whole thing was suspend from. Forget what it was called, but I never went on that one. There was also something like the pirate ship, but much bigger than the one that used to be accessible from Tops in the Myer-Centre in Brisbane. Another one that I di go on was this huge inner wheel that you would be strapped into and it would just spin around using centrifical force to help hold us in place while it  tip us almost sideways you'd never know whist your side. You would just feel this strong amount pressure holding back to human shaped compartment I was directed to. Also a Imax-Theatre in a large tent and a space ship simulator that could hold a small group of people  like we were qued up to be seated into the fuselage shaped compartment like seats on plane or shuttle.

There was motor-cart track and this was step up from the Dodgems. There was also a small animal and plant/flower nurseries to visit as well free of charge. Pony rides and only took them when I was real young. A small museum and art exhibits. There was restaurant that had Smorgas-board  where you would pick what food you wanted and put it on a tray and pay for it at the checkout at the end.   I don't think its there now. There are also numerous stands along the road way that everybody walk along on the way to rides, and other attractions. They would sell transfers that could be applied to t-shirts while you wait. You just pick out the picture or the design you want. The also seel other knick-knacks and things might have became a craze in years past. Thing light up at one end or make funny noises when you shake them and hot chips, dag-wood dogs, fairy-floss, cold rinks. Other stands further inside and out side large pavilion (Which had been rebuilt from the large wooden warehouse style building it used to be and into a large metal warehouse style shed!) and mostly in later years would sell hot lamb or beef rolls or sandwiches made freshly after being cut from the side of meat being cooked right before you eyes.  There were also potatoe things that were just very large potatoes cut up and filled with some creamy sauce and obviously cooked. Nice!!!

The new pavilion seemed a lot less homely than the old one and built around about the same time as the grandstand where you could watch the horse and dog races on any given day in the cooler months and show jumping, stunt cars, co-ordinated driving, and fireworks at night during the week at the show-fair.

Since it had been rebuilt and at a time when I had just started being a teenager. I the whole place had lost a lot of it's original charm. There is also a bar, and a lot indoor seating like at any pub or tavern in this building which served as faro-fair to grandstand seats to watch the outdoor activities.  You can also get hot chips or potatoe wedges here as well as any alcholic or unalcholic beverage you desire. I remember one building next to it that would do these hot chips that were kind of half deep-fried and soggy how I like them before walking back down the road back to my old-folks house. The house I've been talking about.

While in the pavilion, that was filled with stands line side by side to each other neatly and in rows that almost fill the entire warehouse shaped building. With other stores facing in from the inner walls. A lot these stores sold sample bags. Ones belong to confectionary  companies like Cadbury chocalotes and lollies and Smiths chips and other ones I don't recall. You could buy sample bags totally devoted to just one of these all combined variants. One that small toys inside useally, Sometime these would be found in the confectionary based sample bags and other times you might find bag loosely based on your favourite television series of the time. Like M*A*S*H or Dukes of Hazzard or something like that. I remember ones with polystyrene masks and action figures and zip-cord cars. I recall buying the KISS bag based on the famous glamour-meal band that are still famous today as they were back then. You buy masks made from rubber that were considerably dearer than the more flimsy poly ones were.

Have I left anything out.....

there were also stores in that building, useally small and large buisness's selling their wares. Mostly the ones you'd see on late regular night television selling some new house hold product that was new gimmick that would give you some advantage over the unwashed mass's that didn't stay up that late or have a television. There were also aplliances and small room to show off cars or other vechiles off to one side off to one side the room. In later years more of this stuff was common and more so, than the usual show stuff that would make the attraction a lot less interesting to me.

Last time I went to the show, I just walked around and around by myself and never went on any ride. I just watched everything and brought myself hot lamb roll a  and a dag-wood-dog and large soft-drink and few beers at the bar near the grandstand. I watch the fire works show and walked all the way home. Yeah, both houses are within walking distance.

The house I'm supposed to be moving into is down the road from this show. Less than ten minutes walk and my home right now is nearly a hours walk and it's kind of hilly as well.

I remember coming home that night and finding this video on You-Tube.....

Star-trek meets Knights of the Round Table - Via Monty-Python

I remember putting this up in the You-Tube-Gold there more than five year ago and the last time I went o the local show.  It's very boring if you don't have folks or friends to go there with or how to meet other people and make friends there in the mean time. Back then I was very introvert, very shut off from the outside world. Right now, I different, I'm feeling very open going there the way I feel at the moment might be very different for me.

Going back to the old house I should be moving into very soon. I spent many day watching television while my grandmother made hot toasted ham sandwiches for me. while I watched Walt-Disney oriented film on their television set in the old lounge room and lay in the beds looking up at the art-décor sculpted  ceilings before falling asleep.  During the week of the show or more likely the one day I had off from school and the weekend just before mothers day. I would go to the show all day for those three days with my grand-folks and sometimes my older brother and sometime we would return to watch the fireworks from the grandstand at night  or from the house looking through the vertical foot wide metal blinds that covered the window area of the corner veranda where the stairs going to the room underneath around the back of the house. There was a largish window in the small room at the front. The one that had the stairs outside and was merged with the lounge room. It was almost always closed and with venetion blinds over them.

There were windows along the antique dining room wall that were always shut and had a curtain covering them along the outside wall naturally. There were also windows all along the longer veranda on the there side of the bedrooms that were also almost ways shut and probably either curtained or with blinds running horizontal along them. These were open the most often of times and particually during the warmer months, or not since the air-conditioning.   

This is the room I plan to put the computer, my computer when I move in. As fro my entire library, I have been told by my older brother. I'm not aloud to put book shelves in the lounge room, where I wanted them or anywhere else upstairs. They will have to go upstairs, not sure about the other knick-knacks and other stuff I own. I'm very disappointed about this and worried they will be the first to be taken if I ever get broken into while living there.

That making me feel very desperate now.....I've been waiting just over a month now before my brother could get the house prepared for me to move into and this had made me very suspicious about the whole thing when my brother told me it was merely waiting for the electricians to come and reconnect the power.

I was supposed to be moving into today. I really have mixed feelings about this now as I will be more likely abiding there than occupying that space. Everything in the antique lounge rooms and dining rooms are not to be disturbed much at all. They are expensive in their present condition.

What about the car and still in pristine condition. Am I supposed to look at this and never use it. Namely because I haven't a licence to use it. I feel like I'm being tested and not only for robotic notion that I won't disturb anything, but for the very human notion of throwing wild parties with who ever is handy. Because my friends are never handy, not in the last ten years they have been. I am alone really.

I have a darker notion to ruin the house, so it can't sold. But that is definitely going to back fire on me.

I can see me living like I was in Sydney, with all my stuff in storage while living rough in the parks and streets and beaches washing car-windows for tips while my un-employment benefites had been stopped By myself, because I don't want to be caught out there. I was living like that in Sydney for three years.

I was offered this option from by my brother. Who has legal connections...after a altercation between me and my father over a month earlier. I just can't live with my dad anymore. We just keep rubbing each other the wrong way (Not literally!) and barely get along with each other.  The police came around and I was taken to the local watch-house to spend some time, about a hour in a isolation cube. Literally like one of those from Judge Dredd's Mega-City-One. It was like room imbetween the police garage and the lobby inside.  It was completely se through on two sides, bullet-proof and air-tight. Well almost, air-tight and then they let me go and I had to go to court on a Monday of the following week.

I I can say without giving away too much is that I got off and it wasn't all that serious and then that I thought my older brother was going to have me moved out this house into that one to live by myself and that was just over a month ago and right now I'm suspicious about my older brother's motives.

He tells me he wants to sell the older-folks home where I'm to be moving in anytime after three to six months for the money which he already makes plenty of and then I to be moved into a flat. I don't like the sound of that and may try anything to get out of that.  Like rather start living rough around here and move all my stuff into storage or not. This is the best place to be living rough. I'm not sure if I will ever be able to return to Sydney soon with all my stuff being loaded into rental truck or van and moved with me. Sydney sure is a sweet place compare to Brisbane and Ipswich my home town and the state of Queensland especially. It really feels like everything is back ward around here compared to New-South-Wales

As a alternative to Sydney or anyplace in N.S.W.. I'd like to move to the coast, even if it's more expensive to live there. It may be more dangerous living rough like di in Sydney where I think had folks looking after me and not obvious about it a the time.  I want to see the sea and the sand and bikini girls. I may gather enough money for some cheap place or caravan or even buy one. If I can't live rough over there.

I could get my passport, maybe I can move to America and live in Las-Vegas selling jars of Vege-Mite by the road at a make shift stand or selling my home-made snake, spider, scorpion repellent (Maybe that's another use for Vege-Mite . It would have to be mobile ship, otherwise I would be robbed . While having caravan and ship containers fill with all my belongings on the small patch of land I have rented/brought off the Indian land owners on the sand dunes.

Maybe , I could move close to the offices of Tharg or what ever other building you all congregate to  plan out 2000AD magazine. How would like to experience my nonsense on more personal basis.....?

I love to visit the old country and see all the Slaine related sites while stopping at each and every pub on the way. Maybe we could all do this together. Not sure how I would earn a living though and safely. I do have relative living over there. Not that I relish making them feel uncomfortable with my presence.

Yet, right now, my living condition for the next few months will pass from the hands of my father to my brother and he has me even more worried.
« Last Edit: 12 December, 2015, 08:04:20 am by ThryllSeekyr »

Spikes

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #17 on: 12 December, 2015, 05:38:06 pm »
Have I left anything out.....

No, I think you've pretty much covered everything  ;)

But enjoy your new surroundings, and have a relaxing time.

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #18 on: 12 December, 2015, 10:14:46 pm »
Really sorry to hear about your altercation with your Dad, and the fallout, but very glad it wasn't more serious than it was.

It may not feel like it, but from what you say your brother may have your best interests at heart here, TS. From the sound of it there's quite a bit of value tied up in your GPs'  house - presumably this belongs to your father and any siblings he may have, and it sounds like some of the proceeds will be used to set you up with your own place. I know a flat might not sound terribly appealing, but it'll be your own space at last, and it might ease your mind a bit about people coming and going through your place and stealing/causing you harm.

And about that: you really do seem to have this insecurity of your personal space on your mind a lot - to an outside reader this still sounds like something is amiss with the way you're thinking about things, rather than something that's actually happening. I really hope you're seeing a professional about this at the moment and heeding their advice, but because it's a way if thinking I know all too well and it is not good for you at all. If you could get that sorted, I know things would improve for you all round.
« Last Edit: 12 December, 2015, 10:22:21 pm by Tordelback »

ThryllSeekyr

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #19 on: 12 December, 2015, 11:44:06 pm »
Well, I just can't live my father now. He just bothers me to much and gets in the way.

The house is from my mothers side of the family, so it's not really his. Since my older brother has been handling the financial side of things it's more his house, I guess until it's sold. My mother didn't have any obvious siblings so, It's pretty much just our family there. Yet, my father has three brothers and three sisters the house from his parents side of the family was sold and taken off it's stumps and moved somewhere else. The property three was close to a pub and resturaunt who brought the land after the house was moved and extended the parking lot over. It's now just bitumen. Have no idea where that house has gone to . Some of my relatives know that. We're not that close anyway.

I just pleased about the temporary change of scenery and it's built next to a main road and closer to town, so things might be easier in that respect. Just find it odd that I'm being moved out there and then into flat after that.

As for medical professionals, I had my fill of them for the time being.

I'll have start cleaning up soon and putting things into boxes.


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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #20 on: 13 December, 2015, 10:29:34 am »
Quote
Just find it odd that I'm being moved out there and then into flat after that.

It's really not that odd.  A few months ago, you assaulted your father and put him in hospital. Now you're telling us about another (presumably different) incident that ended up with you being taken away and put in the cells for the night. 

Your brother doesn't think it's safe for you and your father to be together in the one house. You've just said you can't live with your father now, because he annoys you so much. Do you think he should move out his own house and let you live there instead?

You really need to take your medication. And do what Tordelback says and go and see your doctor. Despite what you keep telling us here, your problems aren't going away or getting better. They're getting worse.




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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #21 on: 13 December, 2015, 01:21:07 pm »
I'll echo what Tordels and GordonR have said, but look at moving out into an independent lifestyle as a brave new adventure. Self help take's time, Mayor, your a good man (despite what I might sometimes say to the contrary) and hope this works out for you.

Oh, and belated birthday wishes, oh celtic one!  :)

ThryllSeekyr

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #22 on: 13 December, 2015, 02:30:06 pm »
Yes, it's odd that he's moving me out to house, a nice big house or seeming so. A well kept house that may well be a challenge for person such as myself to kept in order.

I've most of the day getting rid of garbage from my own room in preparation for the transfer of myself and my stuff to the new place.

You may have read in another earlier comment I left here that my present bedroom looks like the inside of skip. From about two feet downwards or about that far up from the ground. I walking around in discarded soft-drink cans, cutlery, plates, dishes, old microwave-food containers, papers, envelopes, potato, chip wrappers, chocolate bar wrappers, and sadly, there are a few old magazines that got ruined. These are mainly old movie magazines and few MAD ones!) yet all the good stuff safe. It's just bit smelly from spillages over the last year.

So, I think it's odd that a person such my will be trusted to look after the house that is practically a heirloom and sadly be sold to somebody else because my brother wants the money. I hope he shares that money with me.

I find it strange that you must have asked the authorities about me Gordon if you know as much as you do. Of course, everybody must have jumped to that conclusion when they read Altercation-Father.  Either bad choice of words or I just expected that to be a vague term that was really meant to obscure what I di exactly.

Now that you guess correctly...

Yes, I di knock my father to ground and hit him with the brushy end of broomstick I found handy at the time. My father was being a dick like he was and still does. He was bleeding, but I suspect it was only flesh wound and nothing more serious. While he claimed to be dying, I did panicked a little until the ambulance and police arrived to take me away.

They left me in this faro-fare type enclosure between the watch house's garage and the room with their front desk. After taking my belt and wallet from me. I was just there for a hour and very grateful to be let off and driven back home.

Honestly, I didn't try to seriously hurt my father. I just wanted let him know I was annoyed by something he said to me in a certain tone of voice and with added attitude and as a man now in my forties I have had enough of that shit.

It never works though....he hasn't changed his attitude towards me as he is now. He still does stuff, stuff to annoy me. It was kind of creepy, how he just got up off the ground after I backed away from him and gave him space. He was almost walking around like it wasn't that much of big deal (Even though he was bleeding profusely....) and made a mess in the laundry before calling the authorities. There is like small blood stain on the carpet in the lounge room.

What's a guy got to do, when the other party who said something to me in such way as to offend my personal rights. 

My older bother seemed very objective when he visited us few days later and offered to help me move out into the new house and also temporarily confiscated those replica weapons I have and this another thing I find odd. There is awful lot stuff lying around this house that could be used seriously hurt another person. Including myself. But, the weapons had to taken from me and freely gave them up and felt bad about this later and especially when my brother became very hard to contact by work or home phone and Facebook in the following week up to a week back.

Yes, finally, I moving in now, or when I pack all my stuff, but even though my brother has left the house key with us now and still not the weapons. Which he told me I would be getting back when I have moved out. That should be now, I don't want have to chase him up for those. I had tried numerous times to let him now he might like to return them because he said he would return them after I had my day in court.

MY day in court was bullshit, even tough they let me off. While telling me that I'm not to touch another person violent for the next two years.  Like yeah, really, I think people might expect me to keep my hand s to myself if they think I'm now in check. If anybody gives me half a reason not to.....

While expecting a return of those things while being moved out to the new place that very week.  This never happened as my brother was just not contactable in the following weeks. (Two weeks over a month ago now!) and when it within a week of the convention I wanted to attend dressed as Gandalf and carrying a sword and staff that would be found legal for the cos-play rules. I had to make these..... and this was something I didn't quite get done due, inexperience, lack of right tools and space, and the replica which might have served as point of reference if I could actually take it with me. I definitely thought I needed the scabbard, but on the day I caught the train to closest railway station to his house and still couldn't get there because it' so hard to get to from there. So, I caught the train back to the city to find him at work and eventually did by the afternoon. He still wouldn't give them back to me. So I went home dejected and this possibly didn't help set me back a bit money and a few days....

This was the cos-play-convention I finally managed to get to, but not past the entrance. Because they advertised the fee for entering as that much dearer than they said it was on their website. I know I might have checked this by phone before hand, but that's just another hoop to jump through when I am man and not dog.

Anyway your so called presumption about me, Gordon from what I already said bothers me. Even
 if I made it obvious to know with out really saying so or maybe it's who you know. I just don't like and would prefer you keep those to yourself next time. Because, it's like you know me better than my family if you keep saying things like that. Something I never do myself on this forum. Unless it's about Slaine.

I am in jail, really have been for most of my life, but it's not the cell your thinking of and the bars can't be seen. I think it's just that most people, so called friends and otherwise family find me better off this way.

As for seeing medical professional, and taking medication. I will only take my on consultation on this. I do find it a hell of a personal break through to find the inner strength to refuse these now given home much I encouraged to take these by my father, my brother, my doctors and now you people. These drugs make feel, doped up and sleepy and unable to do things like operate heavy machinery. I won't go on about the other side-effects, but this is something I don't want after being on these things on and off for most of the last ten year and all my life so far really.

I am making self conscious descision to not take them on notion that they are harmful in other ways and not helping me at all. Not only do my problems get worse, the side-effects render me unable to deal with those problems effectively at all.

Besides, you can't expect my prescribed medications to stop what other people do, can you?

TordelBack

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #23 on: 13 December, 2015, 03:07:24 pm »
Ah man, this is hard stuff to read. If the medication is having side effects that you can't stand, then you need different medication or a different type of therapy - not none at all.  You must know you can't be knocking your father about (he must be late 60s or 70s) no matter how much he annoys you, or what hurtful things he says - or anyone else for that matter. And not just for 2 years - never. 

Much as I love my mother she's a nightmare to deal with, and there's no way I could live in her house again, we'd just fight endlessly - that's the way it is sometimes with adults and their parents, but if you're ever at the point of hitting them there's something going wrong with your thinking. Hence the need to get that sorted with a doctor ASAP - none of us are saying this to annoy you or make you feel bad, it's just clear from this side of the computer screen that this is making your life very, very hard.  Millions of people need professional help getting their head straight so they can lead a better life, you're just one of us.
« Last Edit: 13 December, 2015, 03:10:32 pm by Tordelback »

ThryllSeekyr

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #24 on: 13 December, 2015, 03:31:32 pm »
I don't hit my hit every time we fight and if I do I try to do it gently. Not sure how you might imagine that, but I have only come to blow s with him four times in the last ten years and I don't like what I did either.

Hawkmumbler

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #25 on: 13 December, 2015, 03:33:34 pm »
4 times in 10 years is a lot, and it's not the severity of the blow itself it's the phsychalogical damage that's the killer

ZenArcade

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #26 on: 13 December, 2015, 04:28:38 pm »
Just echoing what the guys are saying here TS. Under no circumtance lift your hand to your father again. Firstly it is unacceptable and secondly the system won't be as lenient next time. Go to your medical practitioner and explain what you have said here about the medication, he or she will suggest alternatives. Take good care of yourself. Z
Ed is dead, baby Ed is...Ed is dead

JayzusB.Christ

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #27 on: 13 December, 2015, 05:43:12 pm »
I seriously doubt that Gordon knows anything more about your life than what you've told us all on the board, TS.

Like Tordelback, I have a fairly abrasive relationship with my mother; and the best thing i can do is not live with her.  But physically attacking an elderly person is inexcusable (unless, of course, you're defending yourself from their physical attack, which is not what you were doing).
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ThryllSeekyr

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #28 on: 13 December, 2015, 05:44:59 pm »
You know, I don't think I will be fighting with my dad any more and at least not before I finally leave.

I have told my medical practioner the last few times I saw him I wasn't happy with what I read as the list of side effects that came along with the drugs he gave me and he that they aren't very likely to occur. A slim chance, but I do recall suffering from things like acute drowsiness and this condition called Tartive-Dyskinesia (I had this and it was uncontrollable movement of my lower jaw and it can get worse than that! Bad skin and unnatural weight-gain. I've had my fill of all that and would rather leave it al behind me.

You know, I don't feel so bad when I'm not on the meds, but only when people get under my skin.

JayzusB.Christ

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Re: Happy Birthday......
« Reply #29 on: 13 December, 2015, 05:59:48 pm »
I've only noticed this comment now:

Besides, you can't expect my prescribed medications to stop what other people do, can you?

I think you've missed the point. Therapy, including medication, is to a huge extent about realising that instead of changing other people (it's pretty much impossible, I'm sure you've realised by now), you need to change how you react to them.

As a man who has had to deal with crippling, near-suicidal bouts of depression, I think I can speak with some authority here.
“Men will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest”