Life Spugs because...

[TordelBack]

Just found out that my 12 year old niece is in intensive care with pneumonia.

Pneumonia can be proper horrid stuff, wishing your niece all the very best for a swift rcovery.  My youngest brother had a similar-sounding dose at about 7 and it was an awful experience for all concerned, and he didn't even have a 'lump'.

[Kerrin]

Shit news DDD, hope everything turns out OK for your niece mate.

[Dandontdare]

Thanks guys

Spoke to my brother today to get the latest picture - apparently she contracted some infection that normally gets under the skin and causes boils, but in one in 10,000 cases it gets into the blood and causes big problems. In this case it travelled to the lungs causing (or leaving her open to) pneumonia, and was getting settled in the bone of her  shoulder, causing a big lump. They've drained the lump and left a drain in so that they can keep removing the pus, and she's on maximum antibiotics (including some time-release implant).

She's not been awake since Tuesday, but apparently she almost opened her eyes yesterday.

It's funny, I'm fine  with death, I never really get upset, but the thought of this lively 12 year old sedated and full of tubes is really upsetting me.

[vzzbux]

Grim news DDD. NOthing worse than seeing a loved one so helpless and there is nothing you can do to help. At least she is getting treatment and soon be better. Fingers crossed.



Work absolutely shit at the moment. Over worked and very underpaid. All us workers are in the process of joining a union and have to do it on the QT as any mention of union and we are forced out on our ear.




V

[Peter Wolf]

Just found out that my 12 year old niece is in intensive care with pneumonia.

Pneumonia can be proper horrid stuff, wishing your niece all the very best for a swift rcovery.  My youngest brother had a similar-sounding dose at about 7 and it was an awful experience for all concerned, and he didn't even have a 'lump'.

Best wishes to niece of DDD.

I had it myself last January although it wasnt diagnosed as such at a hospital as i went to A+E with it as being unable to breath because of severe pain and coughing up blood etc wasnt much fun.Luckily i am in good health and if i was weaker than i am i would have been hospitalised and i can see how it could kill someone who isnt very easily.4 days and i was over the worst of it but it took 2 weeks to fully recover from it and the only medication i had was Ibuprofen.

[maryanddavid]

Sorry to hear that DD, Kids are strong  and hopefully she will bounce back quickly.

David

[Roger Godpleton]

Hope things get better, Phil.

[Van Dom]

That's really horrible news DDD. Hope she comes out of it okay.

[Trout]

Bit mixed up here. I don't normally post in this thread, but wondered if anyone has had a similar experience.

A colleague has been found dead, in circumstances that are so far unexplained. It has been said it was an accident, but there is other, even more tragic talk. We just don't know yet.

I was one of several people who, despite liking the guy, found myself in conflict with him recently. It was nothing extreme, but when someone's gone you start to second-guess your own behaviour. I'm not sure how to feel about the whole thing, but I do know I feel very bad, for him and his family.

I don't see what could have been done differently but still several of us aren't coping very well.

Any advice? [spoiler]I've already tried cheese. It only helped a little.[/spoiler]

- Trout

[SmallBlueThing]

Jeez, Trout, that's terrible. And you dont need anyone here to tell you that, judging from your phrasing, nothing you may have said or done can in any way make you to blame. In any way. In ANY way.
You only allude to 'the other rumours', so its not my place to infer anything, but if you're speaking of what i think you are, you should know that the impact of the actions of others upon the person involved, no matter what they are, positive or seemingly negative, cannot be held responsible for even the most tragic outcome.
Hang in there, Trout, mourn for the family, try to understand, but dont mistake genuine and normal grief with guilt.
SBT

[Richmond Clements]

Shit news, Trout.
But- and this is vital- what he did was not your fault.
I knew a guy many years ago who killed himself in a spectaularly messy way with a shotgun in his parents front room. I had spoke to his that very afternoon. I went thought a bit of a 'Jesus- what did I say to him??' for a while, so I know what you're thinking right now.
And it's not your fault.

[Trout]

Yeah, I suppose that's what I'm trying to persuade myself of: not my fault. I expect I'm not the only one thinking that way.

Cheers, lads.

[Kerrin]

That's bloody awful Trout. As the other guys said, despite whatever terrible thoughts about your own actions you may be having, it wasn't your fault. I had a very similar thing happen a few years back and it completely screwed my head up. It's a horribly easy trap to fall in to. Take care fella.

[The Doctor Alt 8]

Well this incident has put my whine into perspective.

Firstly, from the sound of things the cause of death hasn't been determined yet... It could just be an odd accident and as usual under succh "mysterious" circumstances rumours, ill founded or not have started to spread.

I know others have said that this death is not your or anybody elses fault... and this is true. IF and let's make it claer it seems to be an IF. If it was suicide then it's tragic but no one's fault. Not even mental heath exsperts can tell someone's state of mind much of the time.

Not that this is going to be of imidiate help no dolt you and others are analysizing and over anaylizing your last few encounters... But his should fade with time. 

[TordelBack]

That's rough stuff, Trout, my sympathies to all involved.  I'm sure most of us can tell similar sad tales, because that's the reality of the uniquely long reach of suicide - it leaves a huge circle of people wondering in vain what they did or should have done, from the family right out to former friends and passing acquaintances.  Obviously the pain and bewilderment decreases exponentially as you move outwards, but it's still there.  I sometimes find myself almost overwhelmed by sadness and nagging guilt at the suicide a few years back of a guy I was friends with in school, but had drifted apart in the years that followed.  A tenuous enough connection to someone, but the "what ifs" remain even then.