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If you mean Spy Hunter, I think you would have missed out there, value-for-money-wise. It was only a description of driving down a road, with options to speed up, slow down, turn left, turn right and fire your guns, which led to dying in a variety of different ways.

Unless you mean Chainsaw Joe, which would indeed have been brilliant, if I'd had half the clue about programming I thought I had.  

Oh wait, I'm not a bot.

Hang on, it says you're a 'posting machine'.
Reported, muthafucka.

Good point, Peter, by the way, I'd also love to hear what John Smith thinks.  Where's he gone?

Also well spotted by vzzbx there.  Seems like a good design for a helicopter to me:  Why don't they make them like that for real, any engineering-minded people out there?

I received an awesome Spam subject line today:  "Fill your woman's* cave with your enormous tool".  Talk about targeted marketing!

It's an ad for a big cement mixer then? Or is there some metaphor I'm missing?

Thanks for all your kind words and encouraging advice, everyone.  It'll be a good few months before it happens, I only really thought of it last week, but the more I think about it the more I want to do it, so it's about 95% certain at this point - if not Australia then definitely somewhere else far away.  I could go for the downloaded prog option; never thought I'd say that.
Never thought of Brisbane; I'll look into that.

And that appraisal form is very welcome too!

Not from the board though, and not until at least this summer. And only for a year, provisionally. But the English school where I work is closing down along with just about everything else in Ireland.  So i think I'll go to Australia and teach English there.  Does anyone know which is better: Sydney or Melbourne? And how does a man get 2000ad in Australia?

It might be New Zealand also.  I just want to live somewhere with good weather, for once in my life.  It has to be better than being on the dole in a country with bad weather - I did that before for quite a long time and it was shit.

Chainsaw Joe.

A game I was fully convinced I could program in BASIC on the ZX Spectrum, when I was about 12.  It was about a leather-clad Mad-Max-alike (see Mike Jones, my previous post on this thread) who carried a chainsaw through the post-nuclear wilderness, killing punks and tracking down somebody called the Mutant (thanks, City of the Damned).  It would have been something like Green Beret with a cool storyline if I had had the programming abilities I believed I had. I'd really, really overestimated myself there though.  

On the plus side, my friend and me told a guy in class we'd lend him scrolling shoot-em-up Spy Hunter, and proceeded to programme our own version of it.  We did the loading picture and made a text-only version of the game, in which every possible outcome resulted in the player's horrific and graphically-described death ('You are found the next day with your head open and your brains dripping down a tree' is the only bit I can remember).
Anyway we swapped it with him for a proper game (which we copied and swapped back).  i don't think we ever told him - he thought the text bit was a prelude to the action arcade bit.  Sorry, Keith

Had a look at that Yvette's one last night and I genuinely felt nauseous. 
As for that one with the lad looking at porn, sometimes a post-it note over the webcam just isn't enough

Even the black, gnarled lump of cold shit that scarcely beats within my own cavernous chest.

Couldn't have put it better. I used to think country music was shite, till I listened to proper country music.

I beg to differ. I realise that as a comics reader I'm in a minority but I like dancing to dance music.  (I also like lots of other music too.)

With his clone superiority and all the rejuve he has had, who is to say that he has to be receding

I imagine him as receding, mainly because most blokes in their 70's would be. I don't imagine it would be a rejuve priority for a guy who never shows his hair anyway.

Yes, yes and yes.  Hope that's helpful.  If you can track down the issues Eddie Campbell, John Smith and Paul Jenkins also did sterling work on Constantine but I believe it mostly remains uncollected (and I don't think there are plans to do so either).

Forgot to say before, thanks, that certainly is helpful!  I've read most of the Mike Carey and Warren Ellis stuff now - great stuff.  Not mad about John's faffing about in hell in the Carey run but his closing speech and final thoughts (of Mike's run) are possibly the best moments in Hellblazer history. [spoiler]'Don't you believe it, mate.  Don't you fucking believe it.' [/spoiler] Shivers down the spine.

Also horrendously humbled.  A younger Dredd than the Dredd of today (well, today + 122 years) but fucking ace - i also thought it was a photo

Regarding the bios - I seem to recall (falsely perhaps) that we'd seen SOMEONE with a pair of bionic eyes in a previous Dredd or, at least, Dredd all bandaged up following some horrific injury or other.  Thus the telly-addict eyes were perhaps clues present in the very first appearance of the "Dead Man"....

Aye, true enough - never noticed them in the Dead Man myself; but that's just me.  You might be thinking of the time Dredd [spoiler]got shot to fuck just[/spoiler] after Supersurf 10; [spoiler]he was all wrapped up in bandages with one eye looking out.[/spoiler]  Don't remember it being square though, and it was well after he got the bios.

EDIT -By the way does anyone have that Bisley helmetless Dredd? Always fascinates me, that one

Nice work, fellas / fellesses.