Stupidest fictional terrorist ever?

[Krustabi]

Anyone who saw "The Grid" on BBC 2 on Tuesday night will have witnessed a man in a London hotel smoking a fag whilst in close proximity to containers of Sarin and a large lump of plastic explosive. The fag ash subsequently released the Sarin, killing only about 11 people as opposed to hundreds. Can anyone think of any stupider acts by fictional terrorists?

[JamieB]

Try sitting through Season 3 of 24...

J-Bo-1

[Krustabi]

The other highlight of The Grid was the bloke from the Hellmann's Burger Sauce ad getting fried to death in a flat in Hackney.

[House of Usher]

There was that stupid terrorist in the Judge Dredd story who had to see the lecturer he met in the bar again, and start up a romantic affair with her after she'd been interrogated by the judges. He was quite dim...

[Art]

You have to try hard to get stupider than the shoebomber.

[Art]

From Popbitch:

        >> Suicide is painless

[GordonR]

"You have to try hard to get stupider than the shoebomber."


I was thinking of him.  My favourite real-life dumb terrorists, though, are the members of the Guy Fawkes Gunpowder Plot gang who discovered their stash of the gunpowder had got damp, so they spread it out in front of a roaring fire to dry it out.

Can you guess what happened next, readers?

[Art]

Beware the Mitsubishi Martyrs

    Suicide bombers throughout the Middle East
    are often given Ecstasy by their handlers,
    to help inspire them with the fervour
    required to blow themselves up.

    After the Saudi bombings this summer, the US
    ordered a crackdown, and the Saudi authorities
    traced the bombers? Ecstasy to a batch shipped
    into the country by a member of the Saudi
    royal family, based in London.

    The prince has been recalled to Saudi Arabia,
    and has not been heard from since.

(NB: Popbitch does not condone terrorism, but if
you are going to crash an airliner into a skyscraper,
we reckon the experience would be massively enhanced
by being off your tits on MDMA.)

[longmanshort]

I seem to recall hearing about two guys caught videotaping the Detroit-Canada Bridge in April last year.

When their car was searched, dynamite, shotgun shells, and a collapsible baton were found.

Shame they didn't have anywhere near enough dynamite to damage the bridge ...

[Queen Firey-Bou]

well there i was in the late 80's, in some sleazy bar in brittany france, listening to members of some banned welsh holiday home bombers group, a banned cornish group & some other dodgy types, getting pissed ( you have to picture that this bar stinks of piss & the fire place is awash with spit & green gobs, one of the most unpleasant 24 hrs ive spent )...these heroic celtic freedom fighters are bragging about their involvement in the plot to blow up the severn bridge. That never happened, presumably they were too busy sitting on their arran arses singing heartfelt folk songs about some ancient historical bollox.  

they ranked pretty high on the stupidometer.

or the anarchists i used to hang with in the early eighties, yeah man, lets get wasted & play russian roulette with an un-loaded air pistol whilst talking about the impending revolution , man. "got any more hairspray for my dreads man?"
stupid stupid stupid.

kill them all.

[Grant Goggans]

Who, Old Sweatyfoot?  No, he only *seemed* like a work of fiction...

--Grant

[thrillpowerseeker]

I just felt sorry for Swampy...you remember him the eco-terrorist mole??..I heard he broke a hip when he fell out of a tree in some woods near Newbury..anyone name any other 'special brew warriors'?..

[Mike Carroll]

All this reminds me of an old joke:

Two IRA men are on a hillside waiting to ambush a British Army patrol, which is due to pass by at noon.

Well, noon comes and there's no sign of the patrol.

One o'clock, and there's still no sign of them.

Two o'clock crawls around, and one IRA man turns to the other and says, "God, they're awful late. I hope nothing's happened to them."

[Dudley]

September 12th, 2001.  Feeling somewhat outdone by these flashy Muslim terrorist types, the IRA hijack the Goodyear Blimp.  They bounce off the Houses of Parliament, London Eye, Canary Wharf, the MI5 building...

[Andy Diggle]

The terrorist in the opening episode of SNOW/TIGER was pretty fucking stupid, having failed to notice that the detonator on his bomb wasn't set to the same frequency as the trigger switch.