Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments

[SmallBlueThing]

I slept funny and as a result have a bad back.
SBT

[Peter Wolf]

Hassle this evening.

Where i was working today i was chasing cables into a wall before plastering and i must have clipped the insulation on the wire exposing cable which was plastered over today or its plaster on a connecting block on another socket.I know where the fault is and the electrician has been called out this evening to fix it because the clients power was tripping out as they have had a new circuit board and breaker which is highly sensitive.

The point here is why was the circuit live in that room anyway and why were the ends of the cables that were live not covered in insulation tape ?

Why didnt i think to disconnect that circuit because it was live or insulate the cables ?

I got a shock from it earlier but i have been shocked by 240v power lots of times before and it has never done any harm.

[vzzbux]

I have had a right day today.
Firstly I got a phone call from my ex saying my daughter wants to stay with me. I think something big has kicked off but not given any details. Not surprised really, she has two brothers her seven month pregnant mum and other dad(my cousin) and her uncle all living under one roof. I was expected to have her at the drop of a hat as in today. Our house has limited room. Sophies room is just big enough for her and Robbies room is a third the size bigger and to move a fourteen year old in our home would be very hard, and not expected to consult my wife is just stupid. Have recently had a text saying panic over she is staying, thank fuck, for now anyway.
Secondly, having got back from the doctors my wife tells my Robbie has got on his elbow.

All good fun.




V

[I, Cosh]

I just burnt my mouth on a boiled egg. The inside was a lot hotter than the outside.

[Roger Godpleton]

There was a blue stain on the bar of Dove I used to wash my hands and I noticed that it was a similar colour to the type of mouthwash we use in our household.

As a consequence, my hands have evidently seen fit to think that they are, in fact, teeth. In order to mimic the characteristics of teeth they have covered themselves in excezma so as to become hard, like enamel is.

The only way I now have to clean my hands is by dipping them in huge bowls of Aquafresh that cost me a fortune to fill up. I never used Aquafresh before the incident, but for some reason it is the only brand that works.

[House of Usher]

Godpleton, you don't half come out with some mad stuff these days.

Impetigo Jones of the elbow? Sounds yucky. More typical to get that round the gob, I would have thought. Never mind; it should clear up in a week or so.

[House of Usher]

The cruise ship Carnival Splendor without power for 4 days and running out of provisions.

Plenty of scope for wry amusement there.

[Kerrin]

Sciatica. Never suffered with it before and holy shit it's fucking painful. I would cheerfully hack my left leg off with a spade at the moment.

[COMMANDO FORCES]

My wife said she was cold in bed last night 'Southerner ', it was only minus 1 at work for me (still T-shirt weather).
So tonight I decided to fill a hot waterbottle for her (it's inside a fluffy monkey, women.....), I am too nice really. Anyway, after I had filled it up I placed it between my thighs, as I filled the water filter back up. All of a sudden extreme heat registered on my left inner thigh, the fucker had only gone and leaked. Still, better to have a red thigh than a wet bed, unless you like that sort of thing!

[SmallBlueThing]

You had a fluffy monkey woman leak over your inner thigh? I take my hat off to you cf, that's one ive never done.
SBT

[mogzilla]

You had a fluffy monkey woman leak over your inner thigh? I take my hat off to you cf, that's one ive never done.
SBT

contents of nose now on chin ...thankks sbt!

[House of Usher]

I was going to write something about wanting some of them fluffy monkey women, but I gave up on the attempt because I couldn't go the extra-baroque mile that SmallBlueThing managed.

[Peter Wolf]

Next time make sure the Fluffy Monkey Woman doesnt have a hot water bottle inside her.

My wife said she was cold in bed last night 'Southerner ', it was only minus 1 at work for me (still T-shirt weather).
So tonight I decided to fill a hot waterbottle for her (it's inside a fluffy monkey, women.....), I am too nice really. Anyway, after I had filled it up I placed it between my thighs, as I filled the water filter back up. All of a sudden extreme heat registered on my left inner thigh, the fucker had only gone and leaked. Still, better to have a red thigh than a wet bed, unless you like that sort of thing!

It was an explosion of red hot Fluffy Monkey Woman love juice.



The confessions of CF.

[mogzilla]

get yourself a mutant titty crab and you got youself a ppaaaarrtttaaayyyyy!

[SmallBlueThing]

Im willing to bet that cf's fluffy monkey woman wears a hat.
SBT