Stupid things people have actually said to you.

[uncle fester]

Swan Lake  Bless 'em for trying eh?



And no, I have no idea what those llama badges are either.

[Peter Wolf]

And Peter, while I would have almost certainly THOUGHT what you said in Emperor's situation, I'd not have said it.  My sense of self-preservation is way too developed.

I wonder if it was Mrs.Slocum/Molly Sugden ?

"I want to go home and stroke my pussy"

[Dandontdare]

Molly Sugden getting pissed at a bus stop? A scandalous suggestion!

I just discovered a clip on youtube from one of those Ibiza documentaries from a couple of years back - it shows one of my workmates getting very drunk and fired from her job as a rep. Top quotes include "I might wee mysel' I'm that bladdered!" and "I couldn't go in that bar 'cos they keep calling me orange" These have now become the office catchphrases - poor lass is mortified.

[johnnystress]

"Someone's been making allegations...and I know who the alligator is!"

[Emperor]

As for the Emporer situation i would more than likely have ignored as well as ignore being shouted at in the street.I did respond to it once though years and years ago as i was feeling irritable.I wont go into that though other than to say that the culprit [one of a group of 6] who was shouting abuse ended up virtually in tears.

Yes I responded to it once when I was 11ish and it didn't work out so well. On our walk home from school some 14-15 year-old girl from the rougher local school would walk past us in the opposite direction and say something like "Hello sexy" so we decided to say something witty back like "Hello smelly" and about a week later she was with two older lads (with skinheads if memory serves), one grabbed my friend menacingly and the other headbutted me (even though I'm pretty sure it was my friend doing most of it because he was, and still is, a cheeky bar steward who was once caught by the police riding a giant bee home from the pub). I couldn't see straight and had to be helped home. So I've never really engaged with street harassment since (as I get a lot of it I'd have probably gotten into a lot more fights than I have - although I never lost one since that headbutting and I'd argue I didn't stand much of a chance as it came out of the blue ).

[worldshown]

"Hours of work are between 7am and 11pm, Monday to Sunday. We haven't worked out the exact shifts yet. Hourly rate is £6.20. How does that sound?"

It sounds like you don't want to employ someone that's got over ten years experience, that's what it sounds like.

[Peter Wolf]

As for the Emporer situation i would more than likely have ignored as well as ignore being shouted at in the street.I did respond to it once though years and years ago as i was feeling irritable.I wont go into that though other than to say that the culprit [one of a group of 6] who was shouting abuse ended up virtually in tears.

Yes I responded to it once when I was 11ish and it didn't work out so well. On our walk home from school some 14-15 year-old girl from the rougher local school would walk past us in the opposite direction and say something like "Hello sexy" so we decided to say something witty back like "Hello smelly" and about a week later she was with two older lads (with skinheads if memory serves), one grabbed my friend menacingly and the other headbutted me (even though I'm pretty sure it was my friend doing most of it because he was, and still is, a cheeky bar steward who was once caught by the police riding a giant bee home from the pub). I couldn't see straight and had to be helped home. So I've never really engaged with street harassment since (as I get a lot of it I'd have probably gotten into a lot more fights than I have - although I never lost one since that headbutting and I'd argue I didn't stand much of a chance as it came out of the blue ).

Why do you get a lot of it ?

I hardly get any and apart from the above mentioned incident the only other instance was a Geezer + Girlfriend who deliberately wouldnt move out of the way so i shoved past them and he shouts out "OI !! OI!!".I just completely ignored it and went on my way as i wasnt really interested in it.Nonsense.

[Emperor]

As for the Emporer situation i would more than likely have ignored as well as ignore being shouted at in the street.I did respond to it once though years and years ago as i was feeling irritable.I wont go into that though other than to say that the culprit [one of a group of 6] who was shouting abuse ended up virtually in tears.

Yes I responded to it once when I was 11ish and it didn't work out so well. On our walk home from school some 14-15 year-old girl from the rougher local school would walk past us in the opposite direction and say something like "Hello sexy" so we decided to say something witty back like "Hello smelly" and about a week later she was with two older lads (with skinheads if memory serves), one grabbed my friend menacingly and the other headbutted me (even though I'm pretty sure it was my friend doing most of it because he was, and still is, a cheeky bar steward who was once caught by the police riding a giant bee home from the pub). I couldn't see straight and had to be helped home. So I've never really engaged with street harassment since (as I get a lot of it I'd have probably gotten into a lot more fights than I have - although I never lost one since that headbutting and I'd argue I didn't stand much of a chance as it came out of the blue ).

Why do you get a lot of it ?

Gently dodging the double entendre... yes. I'm pretty sure I mentioned it somewhere around here (earlier in this thread perhaps) but I was out and about during the day with female friends on a couple of occasions and they were rather taken aback by the sheer number of strangers shouting things at me in the street (I suspect it'd not happen as often if you are with a few other guys). After a while you can spot it coming too when someone gets that excited look in their eye and they start nudging their friends. For example, once by the crossing near the Adelphi in the middle of Liverpool a white van full of builders was passing by and the guy in the passenger seat bellowed "Don't they have barbers where you come from, boy?" and a few years later miles I saw another white van full of builders approaching as I waited to cross the road and I could see the driver and passenger getting excited, so when the passenger started winding his window down I knew something was coming. The he bellows "Don't they have barbers where you come from, boy?" and, as the drove off, he had a very smug look on his face because of the incredibly original. It might be a Liverpool thing (everyone thinks their a comedian?) as I can't think I get shouted at much elsewhere.

[johnnystress]

I used to get the exact same line

then I cut my hair and dyed it green

"GREEN HAIR" was the new witticism I became used to

[SuperSurfer]

On the subject of hair...

Not to me, but when I was a student in Bristol a friend, who had dyed his hair purple was called by a bunch of 1980s casuals passing him in the street a "perrple 'aired c***!"

[Peter Wolf]

As for the Emporer situation i would more than likely have ignored as well as ignore being shouted at in the street.I did respond to it once though years and years ago as i was feeling irritable.I wont go into that though other than to say that the culprit [one of a group of 6] who was shouting abuse ended up virtually in tears.

Yes I responded to it once when I was 11ish and it didn't work out so well. On our walk home from school some 14-15 year-old girl from the rougher local school would walk past us in the opposite direction and say something like "Hello sexy" so we decided to say something witty back like "Hello smelly" and about a week later she was with two older lads (with skinheads if memory serves), one grabbed my friend menacingly and the other headbutted me (even though I'm pretty sure it was my friend doing most of it because he was, and still is, a cheeky bar steward who was once caught by the police riding a giant bee home from the pub). I couldn't see straight and had to be helped home. So I've never really engaged with street harassment since (as I get a lot of it I'd have probably gotten into a lot more fights than I have - although I never lost one since that headbutting and I'd argue I didn't stand much of a chance as it came out of the blue ).

Why do you get a lot of it ?

Gently dodging the double entendre... yes. I'm pretty sure I mentioned it somewhere around here (earlier in this thread perhaps) but I was out and about during the day with female friends on a couple of occasions and they were rather taken aback by the sheer number of strangers shouting things at me in the street (I suspect it'd not happen as often if you are with a few other guys). After a while you can spot it coming too when someone gets that excited look in their eye and they start nudging their friends. For example, once by the crossing near the Adelphi in the middle of Liverpool a white van full of builders was passing by and the guy in the passenger seat bellowed "Don't they have barbers where you come from, boy?" and a few years later miles I saw another white van full of builders approaching as I waited to cross the road and I could see the driver and passenger getting excited, so when the passenger started winding his window down I knew something was coming. The he bellows "Don't they have barbers where you come from, boy?" and, as the drove off, he had a very smug look on his face because of the incredibly original. It might be a Liverpool thing (everyone thinks their a comedian?) as I can't think I get shouted at much elsewhere.

So you get shouted at because you have long hair ?

Thats what i ascertained from your post.

Some woman who looked like a scrubber shouted out "Why dont you fuck off back to where you came from !!" when i was walking a cross the road.



This was in the vicinity of Spitalfields Market in the East End of London.

[CrazyFoxMachine]

Oh I get no end of twatty haircomments - not so much in Sheffield but in my home town almost constantly.

MY HOME TOWN OF GLASTONBURY.

[HdE]

"Someone's been making allegations...and I know who the alligator is!"

Reminds me of the pithy line from Ed Wood: 'There's been a murder! And somebody's responsible!'


I'm over my DA grumpiness now by the way, chums and pals. Had myself a massive case of net-rage last night.

Still have no ideas about the llamas though.

[Mike Gloady]

Regarding weird chatter from random hooers in the street - once, many moons ago, I was waiting for a bus.  A girl who couldn't have been older than 14 came up to me, bold as brass, and asked me out.  It was a weekday around 4pm.  She was in her school uniform.  I responded without thinking "Er, I'm old enough to be your dad" or some such nonsense that just fell out of my mouth.

"You funtin' paedo wanker!"

Er, surely if I'd said "sure, let's do it" I'd have been that.  Very odd.  These days I ignore anyone talking to me on the street.  If they FORCE my attention I glare at them.  Never EVER respond well to "OI" or whistles.  I'm not your mate OR your dog you fucker. 

[Peter Wolf]

And Peter, while I would have almost certainly THOUGHT what you said in Emperor's situation, I'd not have said it.  My sense of self-preservation is way too developed.

I forgot to say that the reason why i reacted in that situation was because a line was crossed where some people should not go as i will not tolerate being publically humiliated in the street in front of others with abuse like "ARE YOU FUCKING QUEER ??" amongst other things which i wont type without some kind of payback.The idiot who shouted it was holding two opened cans of Tennants Extra so for starters i knocked them out of his hands.The cans flew up into the air and then i did the necessary.

After it was over he was almost crying and he said "Why did you pick on me for i didnt do nothing" !!.

Unbelievable.

When my back was turned one of his friends he was with punched me in the ear which didnt do himself any favors at all.

Belligerant overconfident scum have to be taught a lesson they wont forget in a hurry.They thought that they were safe or untouchable because there were 6 of them.Not so.