Stupid things people have actually said to you.

[House of Usher]

I'm imagining not many men round these parts get involved in home furnishing decisions. It's generally considered the ladies' domain, isn't it? I spend too much time at home, obviously.

[SmallBlueThing]

Too much time at home, relaxing in your housecoat or smoking jacket, sitting upon your chaise, tutting politely over various anomalies in carboniferous dating, while sipping absinthe, i'll wager.

SBT

[Noisybast]

I own several bath sheets. One of them is "aqua".

Or, as I like to put it: pass me my big blue towel.

[TordelBack]

Don't listen to them Ush, so long as you bring your domestic expertise to bear on Search/Destroy agency armour and holsters your masculinity and earthy roots aren't in question.  I bet that cabin on Smiley's World was well stocked with bath sheets.

[House of Usher]

Aqua wouldn't go with my bathroom, the colour of which I'd describe as 'salmon,' with white ceramic and black glass tiles. I think we tend to call the bath sheets big towels or just bath towels, since we don't actually have any bath towels - just hand towels and bath sheets.

And a little domestic expertise goes a long way.


* How far is it to Smiley's World, just out of interest?

[Mikey]

He's posh as fuck is our Ush.

He might well be, but as a man of fiercely working class roots I can reveal that the term bath sheet was always used at home - bath towels were fluffy, expensive and the domain of the bourgoise, so had no place in a working man's household. Thin, hard and scratchy bath sheets built the character that built the nation! They, quite literally, make you red.

M.

[House of Usher]

Stupid things people have actually said to you...

"Try and get that done as quickly as you can. I've got another job for you to do once you've finished that."

[Rog69]

The Wife - "What are you doing in there?"

Me - "I'm having a great big poo"

The wife - "I didn't want to know that!"

[Richmond Clements]

The Wife - "What are you doing in there?"

Me - "I'm having a great big poo"

The wife - "I didn't want to know that!"

Well, that rather depends on which room you were in when she asked... you might have been in the wardrobe or something.

[johnnystress]

 

[House of Usher]

Customer: Have you got any superglue?

Me: Yes we have. What do you need it for?

Customer: My skirting board has come off and I need to stick it back on again.

[worldshown]

"Ukuleles? Tha's wot koala bears eat, innit?"

[SMOKESCREEN:ED:9]

the colour of which I'd describe as 'salmon,'

Sounds FFFishy to me. ba booom tshhhhhhhhh 

[Something Fishy]

You called?

[SMOKESCREEN:ED:9]

You called?

No! And get your fillets off the rug, It's 12th century Persian.