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Messages - Proudhuff

Pages: 1 ... 891 892 [893] 894
Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 08 September, 2003, 10:48:43 PM »
Fact: The faerie tree at Newmarket-in-Fergus, Co Clare, has recovered after a chainsaw attack in August last year. This, as we all know, was the rendezvous point for the Kerry faeries who were off to fight the Connacht faeries.

Fact: There is no french word for rendezvous.

Huffsta B-)

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 08 September, 2003, 09:54:55 PM »
Jings! try that...
saves on the typing


Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 08 August, 2003, 06:01:24 PM »
Fact: your company will get charged for that.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 04 August, 2003, 11:24:07 PM »
Fact: just before dawn on 9 January 1744 James Stuart's son Charles Edward Stuart left his house in Rome on the pretence of going boar hunting North of the city at Cisterna. This was to throw English spies of the scent, he was in fact nipping out for ten Regal, a box of matches and the Daily Record.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 22 July, 2003, 03:35:03 PM »
FACT : there is only so many times a Postal worker can hear the term 'Going Postal'before doing it.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 21 July, 2003, 09:30:31 PM »
FACT: The Specials 'Ghost Town' was a tribute to Scooby-Doo.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 17 July, 2003, 10:05:43 PM »
Fact: Karne wasn't in Havana when I was there.
Fact: you can fly anywhere in the world but it doesn't mean you can land safely.
Che Huffy B-)

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 25 June, 2003, 07:15:07 PM »
Fact Karne is writing the next Scarlett Traces and LXG crossover.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 28 May, 2003, 07:06:14 PM »
Fact: The SFA (Scottish Fitba Assoc)and the Tartan army have signed an agreement with their engish counterparts to support them only when Engerland support the French national team.

Fact: Snowy, Tintin's dog, is a Albino Badger.

Fact Charlie does surf.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 16 May, 2003, 05:35:40 PM »
An oldie  but a goodie, not like Bill Oddie  who is a oddie and a Goodie, but he doesn't smell of pish....

FACT:Real excerpts from the Queen Mum's Book of Remembrance:

     "I think that the Queen Mum and Princess Diana are our very own Twin Trade Towers. At last we can look the people of New York in the face".
     L.Ward, Mansfield.
     "When Diana died I swore I would never smile again, but eventually I did. Now the Queen Mum has gone I cannot image that I will ever smile for the rest of my life, but I will probably break that one too".
     "She was one of the old school, all the remaining royals are shit"
     J.Clement. Grantham.
     "I thought she would never die, she has let us all down very badly"
     D.Holmes, Somerset.
     "She was a trooper and she never gave up. I remember one time she was visiting a school and I asked her if she would like to make a visit to the cloakroom before she left. 'No' she replied, 'I didn't give in to the Nazis and I won't give in to the bladder'. That's how she was, a fighter, who refused to be beaten by anything. She pissed herself later though, it was sickening".
     B. Forrester, North Yorkshire.
     "She was a marvelous woman, and a wonderful lover".
     L. J.Worthington, Penrith.
     "I am absolutely devastated, at least we could have got the day off".
     S.Wilson, Bristol.
     "How refreshing to be able to mourn the death of a member of the Royal family without being accused of being homosexual".
     J. Fletcher, High Wycombe.
     "Her death should act as a warning to others who think it is cool to experiment with drugs".
     E. Franks, Cheshire.
     "On behalf of all blacks, I send the sincerest condolences".
     T.Watson, Ilford.
     "Perhaps if we automated her old golf buggy it could still drive around The Mall on its own and bring pleasure to the tourists".
     Y. Howell, Slough.
     "Once again the Queen is not upset enough for my liking, the woman should have a bit more compassion. How would she feel if it was her     mother?"
     W.Waugh, Richmond.
     "It is such a loss, God has shat on our heads".
     K. O'Neil, Inverness. ( Could this be oor Kevin?)
     "I am sure the Queen Mum will not let this small setback put an end to her public duties".
     N. Wallace, Swansea.
     "I hold Princess Margaret in no small way responsible for this terrible event"
     E. Thompson, West Lothian.
     "Bomb Iraq for us Tony, its the only thing that will make us feel better"
     P.McGregor, Southampton.
     "We must do all we can, send blankets, food parcels, jumpers,anything to help these brave souls who are queuing up to walk past her coffin".
     R. Thompson, Bath.
     "I have been unable to masturbate for five days, and will not do so again until Her Majesty is buried"
     E. Gorman, Derbyshire.
     "Good God, who is next, Geri Halliwell?".
     R. Combes, Romford.
     "No matter how she felt, no matter the situation, she always wore a smile. Just like a retard"
     G. Hollins, East Sussex.
     "I remember she came to visit us in the East End one time. She was so kind, so generous and so sweet. She whispered softly in my ear, 'You know its not true' she said, 'you don't smell of shit'. She was a wondrous person".
     E.Collier, London.
     "Whichever way you look at it, it just is not as exciting as Diana".
     G.Williams, West Midlands.
     "She was one of us, and by that I don't mean she perpetrated insurance fraud or lied about expense claims. She was like us in a
good way. God bless you ma'am".
     L. Weller, Harlow.
     "If only I could get my hands on that fish bone right now, you heartless bastard!"
     J. Hedges, Cowdenbeath.
     "She had such a difficult life, always battling against adversity and misfortune. Let us hope that if there is a next time round she is   given a life of privilege and comfort"
     T.D.Wainwright, Hastings.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 15 May, 2003, 09:26:07 PM »
Fact: It takes about two hours to get this thread on screen.

Fact: the song Suger town by Nancy Sinatra is infact about Bourville and not a drugs reference.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 06 May, 2003, 09:09:48 PM »
Fact: I just about added a fact about Kyle that would have had me drummed out the regiment. Pass the port

Major Huff

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 01 April, 2003, 09:20:25 PM »
*The Isle of Sheppley is in fact a crashed spaceship.

*A squaddie in Edinburgh Castle once removed its Volcanic plug by accident, disaster was only averted by a quick thinking cleaner who stuffed the hole with passing mouse.

* Chile is the only country named after a food.

*The youngest contestent on Blind date was a foetus, it won a weekend for two ferreting in Cumbria.

*Most fish can swim backwards, they just chose not to as it makes them waterlogged.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 01 April, 2003, 09:08:34 PM »
Fact: The Pogues are the only band in the world who's rider included 3 blind mice and an airpistol at every gig.

Off Topic / Re: Get Fact!
« on: 01 April, 2003, 09:06:52 PM »
Fact: The orginal happy ending of Apocalyse Now! was changed after a valley test viewing.

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