Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments

[Funt Solo]

In an attempt to best your woes, Shark - I once took a strimmer through a fresh dog turd, which had the effect of splattering me, head to toe.

I realized that I needed some assistance, but I could feel that there was turd shrapnel on my lips, so I didn't want to say anything - so I was tapping the back door to the house with a (non-shitty) stick, and groaning like a zombie trying to get someone's attention.

You'd have thought that The Generation Game had nothing to teach us - but sometimes they'd challenge middle-aged, middle-class couples to eat a creamy pastry without licking their lips.

[The Legendary Shark]

Heh, I once strimmed a very dead hedgehog, spattering myself in pungent Walking Deadness. I thought it was weed juice until I came to pick the bits out of my beard. Sometimes I marvel that I'm still alive :-D

[von Boom]

Crikey, Sharky, you really know how to do things. No half measures for you. I cringed reading your escapades. Feel better, man.

[The Legendary Shark]

Thanks, vB - feeling seriously sore right now. An early night beckons.

[Tiplodocus]

Well if it's any consolation, that tale of woe gave me a good LOL. Sorry, I'm a terrible person.

[The Legendary Shark]

No you're not, Tips - it was extremely funny to watch. I may even change my name to The Legendary Wile E. Coyote!

[sheridan]

No you're not, Tips - it was extremely funny to watch. I may even change my name to The Legendary Wile E. Coyote!

I didn't want to say, but as the events unfolded it did feel like I was reading the script of a cartoon

(get well soon)

[I, Cosh]

I remember my dad strimming a frog once. He didn't recommend it. Funny story as long as you're okay!

I lost my Dante badge last night. A little good crest I've had on my winter jacket pocket for ages. Can't even remember where I got it. Bah.

[von Boom]

Now THAT's an impediment, Cosh. Hope you find it. Check unused boots in the cupboard, it might have fallen into one of the.

[paddykafka]

Holy Heck, Sharkie! You really have been through the wars lately. Hope that you'll be back on the mend soon.

In the meantime, I attach the following link, as I was reminded of this little gem while reading of your recent mishap.

https://www.anglersnet.co.uk/forums/index.php?/topic/45373-funny-poem-the-sick-notemurphy-and-the-bricks/

[The Legendary Shark]

Heh, classic!

I'm doing fine, thanks - still a little stiff but the pain's easing and the swelling's going down.

[JayzusB.Christ]

Feck, Sharkie, glad you're on the mend.  Cosh, that's a fecker.  That's the kind of thing I really hate losing, and I lose things all the time. 

[Funt Solo]

What seems very much like a "bomb scare" style threat has been circulating on TikTok that suggests there will be some kind of violent assault in a US school today (the 17th), so (across the entire country) many schools are cancelling classes - many students are anyway staying home.

I'm sitting waiting for my class to arrive.

It would be a ridiculous overreaction - if this wasn't the USA.

Odd, though, that something that used to disrupt a single building or institution can, with the help of social media (and ridiculous gun laws) affect an entire multi-state nation.

[Batman's Superior Cousin]

I broke my middle toe on Thursday whilst getting ready for work and now I'm off for a few days recovering.

[paddykafka]

My printer is intermittently jamming, and not in a fun Bob Marley reggae kind of way.