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Author Topic: The Black Dog Thread  (Read 85860 times)

Jim_Campbell

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #630 on: 17 October, 2021, 09:27:12 PM »
I'm still conflicted about deciding to give up on a career that I've spent nearly 20 years on but if it is going to kill me then f*** it.

My dad quit a teaching career that he unreservedly loved for the same reasons. It bought him maybe an extra fifteen years of life.

Don't feel bad about making the best decision for you. We're encouraged to define our lives in terms of our profession, but that's bollocks. Don't feel bad about your choice — if it's killing you, then you've absolutely made the right decision.
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Funt Solo

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #631 on: 17 October, 2021, 10:42:15 PM »
*board being supportive is nice*
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Tjm86

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #632 on: 18 October, 2021, 07:40:32 AM »
We're encouraged to define our lives in terms of our profession, but that's bollocks. Don't feel bad about your choice — if it's killing you, then you've absolutely made the right decision.

Thanks Jim, that's a fair point.  If I remember rightly there has been research into teacher post-retirement life expectancy that basically says it is measured in months if you go to retirement age.

Like I say, I feel conflicted because I invested so much in it.  Right now though it means I can invest in my family.  Mother in law just being told she can't drive because of her eyesight has hit her and my wife hard.  This way I'm available at the drop of a hat. 

Youngest just started comp.  She can do clubs because I can fetch her home after.  Couldn't before.  So my wife is so much calmer about everything.  Plus I'm not fighting down the BPD cascade so everyone is happier.

Oh and Funt, on the point of support from the forum this does seem to be the one time when everyone comes together.  We may not agree on politics, Regened or vaccination but when it comes to mental health everyone is on the same page.  Probably because so many of us have first hand experience.

Funt Solo

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #633 on: 18 October, 2021, 06:54:16 PM »
Oh and Funt, on the point of support from the forum this does seem to be the one time when everyone comes together.  We may not agree on politics, Regened or vaccination but when it comes to mental health everyone is on the same page.  Probably because so many of us have first hand experience.

I often avoid responding on this thread because I think of myself as a bit of a social klutz, and can't often think of anything helpful to say that isn't just about me - but I was saying to my wife how proud I was of how supportive everyone was being here.

[I did say more, but then deleted it because it was about me. Summary: some of the struggles with teaching resonate - I'm in decade three.]
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JayzusB.Christ

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #634 on: 18 October, 2021, 07:40:32 PM »
@Jade Falcon, you haven't updated in a while. I hope things have improved for you. You too Jaysus.

Sorry, I totally missed this. I've banged on in other threads about my boat (also home) burning down recently and taking pretty much all my possessions with it, and I was waiting for the depression to hit me like a steam train.  It never did though - all I lost were things, but not people. And people have been incredibly compassionate and helpful in a way that reduced me to tears more than once (I'll never forgot the little boy from a few boats up finding a 20c coin from the bit of wreckage that was on the towpath and handing it to me the morning I got out of hospital).

Jade, I really hope you're doing OK. You too, tjm, and Jim is spot on - the idea of being a better person because of how much work you do is utter bollocks.  In fact the idea of being worthwhile, or not worthwhile, at all is also bollocks - took me a few discussions with my online group to truly, properly get that and believe it.
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Rara Avis

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #635 on: 19 October, 2021, 06:10:24 PM »
I did see something about that somewhere but I thought you were joking about having a Viking funeral.

I can't even begin to imagine how you felt / feel about that.

I'm glad you're ok! And then you had a tumble off your bike after that didn't you?

I won't ask you to go over the terrible details again - is there anything you need I could help with? We're both in Ireland, right?

Tjm86

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #636 on: 19 October, 2021, 09:27:22 PM »
I did see something about that somewhere but I thought you were joking about having a Viking funeral.

Well, he has posted in the past about how Wulf Sterhhammer is his real hero and that is how he wants to be interred.  So perhaps someone heard about that?

[please engage irony / sarcasm / humour circuits ....]

JayzusB.Christ

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #637 on: 19 October, 2021, 11:18:12 PM »
I did see something about that somewhere but I thought you were joking about having a Viking funeral.

I can't even begin to imagine how you felt / feel about that.

I'm glad you're ok! And then you had a tumble off your bike after that didn't you?

I won't ask you to go over the terrible details again - is there anything you need I could help with? We're both in Ireland, right?

The bike fall was before that - it hasn't been my year...
I'm ok now though, thanks a million for your kind offer all the same.  Hopefully we will catch up sometime though, and have some prog-related craic.

Don't remember the Viking funeral thing - sounds like a case of 'be careful what you wish for' though :)
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Rara Avis

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #638 on: 20 October, 2021, 06:28:21 AM »
No it hasn't been your year but hopefully things will pick up for you in 2022.

Sounds good to me - I'm in Dublin city, not sure where you're located.

sheridan

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #639 on: 20 October, 2021, 12:29:50 PM »
We're encouraged to define our lives in terms of our profession, but that's bollocks. Don't feel bad about your choice — if it's killing you, then you've absolutely made the right decision.

Thanks Jim, that's a fair point.  If I remember rightly there has been research into teacher post-retirement life expectancy that basically says it is measured in months if you go to retirement age.


That seems unlikely?  "research from the Office of National Statistics shows that male and female teachers are likely to live to 83 and 86 respectively. (current retirement age is somewhere between 65 and 68 depending on your date of birth).

sheridan

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #640 on: 20 October, 2021, 12:32:54 PM »
Don't remember the Viking funeral thing - sounds like a case of 'be careful what you wish for' though :)


I had a friend who had a Viking funeral.  His ashes were put in a ship on Tate Hill Sands, Whitby (site of many a beach party) and three women fired burning arrows at the ship until it caught fire.

Hawkmumbler

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #641 on: 20 October, 2021, 12:35:33 PM »
I'm planning on going the Sean Lock route, to be cremated and have my ashes blown into Tony Blairs eyes.

JayzusB.Christ

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #642 on: 20 October, 2021, 02:22:22 PM »
No it hasn't been your year but hopefully things will pick up for you in 2022.

Sounds good to me - I'm in Dublin city, not sure where you're located.

Just outside, between Celbridge and Newcastle, but a wee bit all over the shop at the moment  - staying in a caravan in a neighbour's yard, but a friend is building a wooden cabin on his land and is going to rent it out to me.  Stay in touch anyway and we'll sort something out for sure.
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Rara Avis

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #643 on: 20 October, 2021, 03:25:58 PM »
No probz, I'm up to my oxters until mid Nov with college stuff so no rush.

Jim_Campbell

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Re: The Black Dog Thread
« Reply #644 on: 20 October, 2021, 06:50:01 PM »
I had a friend who had a Viking funeral.  His ashes were put in a ship on Tate Hill Sands, Whitby (site of many a beach party) and three women fired burning arrows at the ship until it caught fire.

One of my earliest 'online' friends (from the heady days of Usenet, no less) did something similar.
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