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I guess it's a financial and/or procedural thing. Something needed doing recently and some IT bod was employed to do it, and probably their contract indemnified them against the loss of Sharky's ability to annoy the neighbours with his seemingly infinite collection of Sharkworld Avatars (soon to be collected into a kind of multiversal Top Trumps card game*) or the loss of the Active Topics page. So the job was done, the fee was paid and any "minor niggles" would be sorted out next time. Splundigs, Tharg, and thanks for all the groats. Or maybe the IT's all in-house and there just isn't time to listen to us whining nonscrots complaining about piffling avatars when numerous Twoothy characters are in such dire and imminent peril, requiring The Mighty One's undivided attention.  "The forum? Pfa! They will come anyway. Their reverence for my mighty organ far outweighs their trifling annoyances. Ignore them and concentrate on trying to bond vodka molecules with polystyrene..."

From what little I know of you, Funt, you seem capable of rectifying these trifling annoyances and potentially even capable of invoking the much prayed for Holy Like Button with nary more than a dozen keystrokes and a moderately strong drink. If not you, then I bet someone here can do it. Donate (insert ill-informed short unit of time here) or two to helping TMO service his loyal Squaxx so that He doesn't have to take His mighty eye off those miserable creator droids for a moment. But I guess "the insurance" strangles such ideas at birth.

We can only entreat The Mighty One to take a moment from his lofty concerns to address the minor quibbles of us, His lowly servants. Pray, sacrifice a thrill sucker (or a Barry Manilow cd), kneel facing Betelgeuse and repeat after me...

Our Thriller who art in Oxford,

hallowed be thy name.

Thy thrillage come.

Thy will be done

in Progs as it is in the Meg.

Give us this week our weekly comic,

and forgive us our criticisms,

as we forgive those who criticise against us,

and lead us not into Marvel,

but deliver us from Dark Horse.

For thine is the thrill and the power, and the story,

forever and ever.

Amen.

P.S. Please can you fix the website and give us a "like" button. Ta muchly.

Amen, Amen.

*No it isn't.

Okay, so this is Jared Bernstein. He is the chair of the United States Council of Economic Advisers and a senior fellow at the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities. His advice carries great weight. Hear him...

Call me a cynic, but he seems to me a tad overqualified for the job - he is, after all, trying to make sense of the senseless. He'll probably be fired soon because making sense of things isn't his job. It is, after all, hard to make sense of a con without calling it a con, but kudos to him for trying.

I didn't think so.

Ancient Death stands in a draught
His black-flamed candle flickers
As beneath his threadbare midnight robes
He hides a crafty Snickers

Are there any other characters that don't age (or get younger) in Dredd? Hershey was allowed to age. PJ Maybe didn't stay a kid forever.

Captain Kidd from Robo-Hunter got radically younger while Sam only got significantly younger, does that count?

Destroyer of Twirls, surely?

Writer gets invited to pagan festival... I think this might mean even more royalties for Stephen King.

"Vacuum Bag" - the new superhero from Viz.

I don't wish to gnaw that, kindly teethe the stage...

Luxury! I'm having soup made from the water used to wash the turnips before they were peeled.

Today is a good day to Dyson.

And hoover bags.

Incorrect. Hoover bags are placed in a vacuum cleaner they don't exist there.

Are you saying that as soon as a hoover bag (the product) is placed inside a vacuum cleaner, the bag ceases to exist? If this were true, no hoover bag would ever fill up with dust because it wouldn't be there while the closed-up vacuum cleaner was running. However, hoover bags do get full of dust and fluff, therefore they do exist inside the vacuum. QED.

Christopher Lee on helium.

So, apart from electron microscopes, GPS satellites, hoover bags, protective tape, flasks, cleaning equipment, food preservation, chemical engineering, vessel-proofing, space probes, testing chambers, kissing and eye-watering fellatio, what have vacuums ever done for us?

And hoover bags.