Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments

[Peter Wolf]

I have each and every issue of 2000AD, the megazine, crisis, starlord, tornado, scream, the sci fi specials, winter specials, annuals, yearbooks, posterprogs, toxics, plus near complete runs of battle, eagle, bullet, and piles of warlords, victors, rangers, look & learns, jets, and tigers. And yet i can find nothing to read. How is this possible?


SBT

I have the same problem sometimes with what music to listen to.Stacks and stacks and stacks and stacks of CDs yet i dont want to listen to any of them yet i want to listen to something yet i dont know what*.

*I dont know what i want but i want it now.

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

@Paddykafka-

Carefully place a dog turd in a plastic container within a box and jiffy bag that up, post it to yourself and chuckle when it never arrives.

That's going a bit far. I would suggest a more calm and measured approach, such as writing a letter to yourself, a letter containing a random piece of text translated into Arabic Abjad, then sign it off in English with the phrase 'DEATH TO THE WEST'. Sprinkle some talcum powder/salt/flour/all 3 in the envelope, that will put the sh*ts up him. Bait your letter with an old USB key on which you've installed a virus.

I learned that last bit when I did a year working for a Large Online Retailer's Fraud Department. Needless to say I thoroughly I despise flim-flam's and scheisters

[Peter Wolf]

Suggestions from the board much appreciated!

I would have a would with him about it and act as though you are not suspicious of him and ask him if he has lost or not received any post lately.That way you are not making any accusations but i would watch his reactions very closely for signs of guilt and see if he is lying.

If you wanted to go further than that i would go on to say that there used to be a problem with post going missing in the building and the culprit who was a resident was dealt with severely so warn him to be careful of his post going missing.

The vast majority of people are not able to hide guilt and are terrible liars.

[Dandontdare]

Cars been in the garage for 2 weeks cus the dolts keep ordering the wrong part. The courtesy car they have blessed me with is a bloody Panda and to add insult to injury some daft twat has just went into the back off it.

Surely that can only improve a Panda?

[Emp]

my cars not the bloody panda...thats the shite they have me roamong about in

[Emp]

Improves th Panda...Not neccesarily my shoulder...

[TordelBack]

I've had to drive a Panda on a number of occasions and they truly are awful things - the handling of a shopping trolley with the engine out of a Lego train.

[Dandontdare]

After an expensive phone call to the Talk Talk helpline, I've been advised that I can no longer view my e-mails with Firefox, I have to use Internet Explorer, which is a pain in the arse.

[The Legendary Shark]

How about using Thunderbird, the Mozilla email client?

[Dandontdare]

How does that work then - would it mean a new e-mail address? I use the email on my ISP (...@tiscali.co.uk) and it's shit but I've no idea how to set up a different one.

[The Legendary Shark]

Nope, you download and install Thunderbird and then set it up to automatically download your emails for you - you'll never have to visit your Talk-Talk or Gmail page ever again! (I'm actually writing this in the browser window of Thunderbird right now.)

http://www.mozilla.org/#feature-thunderbird

[Dandontdare]

Cool, I'll look into it, cheers!

[Dark Jimbo]

My brother started mowing the lawn only for an entire family of partly shredded mice to drop out of the mower. Swallowing back our revulsion/horror, we finished off the twitching survivors with a hammer, cleared away the bodies and while I finished the grass he changed his bloody clothes and took a shower. Said shower backed up our dodgy drains and within minutes the front porch was flooded with stinking sewage water. NO cleaning stuff in the house (the day of 'the big shop' is tomorrow) so I trudged to Co-Op for rubber gloves and cloths, surrounded by smug, smiling people getting in beer for their evening BBQs. Forty minutes of rather revolting cleaning followed, in the baking sun. Both sweating buckets by the end but unable to take a shower - oh the irony!

But my ear finally popped today after days of tinnitus brought on by a head-cold, so I can't help being in a good mood regardless. 

[The Legendary Shark]

Jeezus, where the Hell do you live? The Ravenglade Estate??? :-&

[IAMTHESYSTEM]

It's going to be 35 degrees centigrade [or is it Farenheit] where I work today. Sweatsville or what? Not looking forward to work today but who does?