Department K's Magic Beam Weapons of Required Narrative Outcome are really frustrating. They completely destroy the body-zombies by tearing them apart but when the character from an old Ribena advert shoots the mini-Collosi aliens with his Magic Beam Weapon of Required Narrative Outcome, it seems to have the effect of discolouring them (like in a Looney Tunes cartoon, until the next episode).
They're pretty annoyed at being discoloured, so they fire their Magic Beam Weapons of Required Narrative Outcome at Ribena-man, which makes him go "NNF!", but otherwise shows no sign of having hurt him in any way.
That might all be okay, I suppose, if this was a kid's comic [aha!], where you need to make sure that nobody actually gets hurt. But, turn back a couple of pages to watch the old decrepit person getting gratuitously drowned in a bath. Or skip forward a few and see someone having their eye plucked out in Hell.
Skip Tracer is maybe the half way house, but it seems like Blake Pentax shouldn't be scared of anyone because when the going get's tough, he uses his magic WHOOOOMPF powers to knock everyone over, then he runs away again. I don't know why he runs. He has magic WHOOOOMPF powers.
I know, I know - Department K isn't for me - it's for a collected edition to sell to Children of Squaxx, and I'm just funding it's development. But why am I funding it's development?
[/rant]
