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Squaxx Telling Jokes

Started by The Legendary Shark, 22 November, 2014, 09:12:18 AM

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The Doctor Alt 8



Dandontdare

1st astronaut: "I can't find any milk for my coffee"
2nd astronaut: "In space, no-one can. Here - use cream"

TordelBack


Jim_Campbell

Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 September, 2020, 03:48:07 PM
1st astronaut: "I can't find any milk for my coffee"
2nd astronaut: "In space, no-one can. Here - use cream"

Aaaaand now I'm contractually obliged to hunt you down and kill you.
Stupidly Busy Letterer: Samples. | Blog
Less-Awesome-Artist: Scribbles.

Jim_Campbell

Stupidly Busy Letterer: Samples. | Blog
Less-Awesome-Artist: Scribbles.

Dandontdare

I know, I know. I read it and just had to share the pain  :lol:

Colin YNWA


The Doctor Alt 8



JayzusB.Christ

Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 02 September, 2020, 07:31:53 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 September, 2020, 03:48:07 PM
1st astronaut: "I can't find any milk for my coffee"
2nd astronaut: "In space, no-one can. Here - use cream"

Aaaaand now I'm contractually obliged to hunt you down and kill you.

Nuke him from orbit - it's the only way to be sure.
"Men will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest"

paddykafka

Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 September, 2020, 03:48:07 PM
1st astronaut: "I can't find any milk for my coffee"
2nd astronaut: "In space, no-one can. Here - use cream"


Outstanding and Bravo, sir!

JayzusB.Christ

Quote from: paddykafka on 03 September, 2020, 12:31:38 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 September, 2020, 03:48:07 PM
1st astronaut: "I can't find any milk for my coffee"
2nd astronaut: "In space, no-one can. Here - use cream"


Outstanding and Bravo, sir!

Duly sent on to 2 WhatsApp groups (though I've replaced the astronauts with Ellen Ripley and an alien).
"Men will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest"

Tjm86

Youngest daughter just got up, asked to have a shower as she had a knot in her hair.

I said to her "no there's not ..."

"Dad, it's too early for Dad jokes!"

Well, that's me told (or not ...)

The Enigmatic Dr X

THE ASTLEY PARADOX

If you ask Rick Astley for his copy of the movie Up, he cannot give it to you as he will never give you Up.

However, in doing so, he lets you down - thus creating the Astley Paradox.
Lock up your spoons!

Tjm86

Apparently the Maths world is up in arms today.  0 has come out as non-binary.

The Legendary Shark


Past, Present, and Future walked into a bar. It was tense.

~~~^~~~

Last December, having no money, my brother and I decided to steal a tree from the local forest. So, armed with axes and a saw, we wandered around the forest for four and a half hours until my brother said, "I'm sick of this. I'm going to cut down the next Christmas tree we see, whether there's lights on it or not."
[move]~~~^~~~~~~~[/move]