Career Change - Help me please, I want to cut up your brain

[paulvonscott]

Hi, I wondered if anyone had any contacts on how to become the experimental brain surgeon?  

For many years I have wondered what is in people's heads, and how to cut out the things that make them bad (i.e. are they a different colour, such as orange?).  Now, in my late mid-thirties I'd like to change career from library assistant to the cutter of the brain organ.  And yet, I don't know how, so I'm posting here on the message board for a comic which started in 1977 and continues to chronicle the adventures of Judge Dredd, sure I shall recieve an answer.

Please help, I am serious about mental.

Paul

p.s. I have already made a clinic in my shed, if you'd like to donor your brain, I have many buckets filled with vinegar readied and waiting.  I have practised on the squirrel, but it was not satisfying, and my home made anaesthetic failed both me and the squirrel, who sadly did not survive the delicate procedure with the masonry drill.

p.p.s. On second thought, how do I become Air-Traffic Controller, and control the big birds in the sky?  I shall make them peck my enemies to death.

[SamuelAWilkinson]

Satire certainly is a wonderful thing.

[Wils]

Hehehe. You have no idea how hard it was for me to not post something similar earlier on.   :lol:

[Roger Godpleton]

Paul, if things don't work out you can come and work for me as a prostitute any time.

[paulvonscott]

Cheers Godpleton, it's always handy to have a plan C.

[jakeblues69]

Hi, I wondered if anyone had any contacts on how to become the experimental brain surgeon?  

For many years I have wondered what is in people's heads, and how to cut out the things that make them bad (i.e. are they a different colour, such as orange?).  Now, in my late mid-thirties I'd like to change career from library assistant to the cutter of the brain organ.  And yet, I don't know how, so I'm posting here on the message board for a comic which started in 1977 and continues to chronicle the adventures of Judge Dredd, sure I shall recieve an answer.

Please help, I am serious about mental.

Paul

p.s. I have already made a clinic in my shed, if you'd like to donor your brain, I have many buckets filled with vinegar readied and waiting.  I have practised on the squirrel, but it was not satisfying, and my home made anaesthetic failed both me and the squirrel, who sadly did not survive the delicate procedure with the masonry drill.

p.p.s. On second thought, how do I become Air-Traffic Controller, and control the big birds in the sky?  I shall make them peck my enemies to death.

[House of Usher]

Damn you, P.V.S.!   :evil:

[Tweak72]

Dear Paul

I am in no way connected to brain surgery or air traffic control. I am mealy an occasional poster on a Sci Fi Comic message board who has an passion for Comics and any thing with in the Sci Fi & Fantasy genre. So I am obviously best suited to answer your query as I am a world authority on Brain surgery, Air Traffic Control and any other random crap you can come up with.

Well done you.

Now, after reading your post, I want to ask you a frank question about your query. Is there some young lady involved? Have you promise brain surgery to some young thing to impress them? Are you now desperately posting on message board after message board leaving your email details on each one for all to see in the vain hope to get a break and ultimately get the information you need to slime your way in to her panties?

If that's the case have you considered performing brain surgery on your self? They say the best way is by "jumping in at the deep end" as we quaintly say in this country. And what better way to "score" with the young fine fillie then to really make a show of it. If anything goes wrong then you will probably not even notice afterward and even seem slightly less cretinus than you do now.

Hope I have helped and Good luck.

 

[WoD]

I'm sure there's something clever going on here, but I've been away for a week and have no idea what...can you help a poor old Welsh man work this out...

[Tweak72]

I'm sure there's something clever going on here, but I've been away for a week and have no idea what...can you help a poor old Welsh man work this out...

Unless I am missing the point completely (which lets face it might be the case) PVS started this thread because there have been lots of threads appearing on here like this one //http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=23424.

If I have missed the point completely then I am claiming I am being some kind of ironic. Or something.

[Wake]

sciga's thread on movie making for the clueless was all well and good, but when the same guy then started a new thread about wanting to be a music producer it all toppled over into spam.

[Proudhuff]

PVS I have lady friend would like to meet you, please send your credit card number so she know you are real.

[paulvonscott]

"If that's the case have you considered performing brain surgery on your self?"

I have practised in the mirror, with little success.  I'm told I can expect my poor run of luck to run for at least another seven years.

My credit card number is 8.  But please don't tell anyone.

[Queen Firey-Bou]

blimey  ! thanks for the links there I too was feeling a little lost, & was about to earnestly advise PVS that OU is a good place to start. I think I'm lacking the bit of the brain that recognizes satire.. SLUtCHHHhhh splatt... Owww... here, is it this grey bit ?  


I feel funny...

[Gavin_Leahy_Block]

Any chance of free lobotomies for board members then?