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Science is Drokking Fantastic Because...

Started by The Legendary Shark, 21 July, 2011, 11:05:57 PM

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Frank

Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 05 August, 2013, 08:04:23 PM
I just like people saying that it's somehow "less natural" than say... any kind of hyperprocessed pseudo-meat in Iceland  ... I have a hankering for some quorn

I've only ever eaten quorn once (accidentally), in a restaurant. It was alright, but it seems silly to shape protein into meat shapes - if you're that desperate for the thrill of eating a sausage just have a proper fucking sausage. Contrary to Pops's assertion, I'll basically eat anything, and I made all the turkey and sprouts my Mum served up at Christmas disappear - but I don't really enjoy the taste or like the look of either of them, so I don't cook them for myself.

Sergei Brin's Google burger won't be making its way onto my plate for similar reasons.


Steve Green

Quorn just sounds like fake porn.

I don't really follow the 'just have a burger or sausage' logic - they're no more natural for meat than some shaped fungus is - they just got there first.

I couldn't honestly tell the difference between a TVP hotdog and a real one, and I find it strangely fascinating that they've managed to make fake fish-fingers and scampi.

I can't bear to try fake tuna though, the smell of the real stuff makes me heave.


CrazyFoxMachine

My missus runs a fake meat blog - substitute meat is an interesting type of thing and allows for a greater range of cross-veggie eating. Means we can sort of eat the same things without destroying reality. Frankly, I just love veggie sausages. Not sure why, just have a fever for them (maybe innuendo).

I know I met a retired veggie once who said she had to "give up" in the eighties because there was only sosmix and lentils available and that was it rather than the full fake everything there is now and that she'd been tempted back into the non meat fold (definitely innuendo) by the variety. Substitute cheese still has a way to go though.

Oh and yeah fake tuna's replicated the 'orrible stench alright :S BLORK

Frank

Quote from: Steve Green on 05 August, 2013, 10:19:14 PM
I don't really follow the 'just have a burger or sausage' logic - they're no more natural for meat than some shaped fungus is - they just got there first.

I don't eat food for the shape. Forming food into play-do replicas of other foodstuffs suggests (to me) that the person in question wishes they were really eating something else instead. I used to know a girl who ate veggie bacon, which - because of the wretched taste and the awful, awful stink of it - she could only have been doing because it reminded her of the thing she actually craved. That kind of self-denial makes no sense to me.

I agree that anyone who's ever taken a look at the stuff inside a Scottish pie is under no illusion that what they're eating is either natural or any kind of meat.


Definitely Not Mister Pops

I was once a victim of Quorn fraud. It didn't fool me for a second. Fake meat is disgusting and immoral. It's lying about being meat. There a plenty of delicious non-meat foods you could have instead, mushrooms and nuts and suchlike, but instead you have an inferior shadow of meat. It's like following a tribute act while refusing to listen to the original artist.

Why fake it? You don't see people going around making beef cucumbers.
You may quote me on that.

CrazyFoxMachine

Well funny banter mate, you could be on Chris Moyle's Comedy Empire with material like that - !!

yuk yuk yuk yuk

Hawkmumbler

I'll just be saying this. Sainsburys Veggie Hot Dogs. They don't taste like meat. There not trying to be meat. Who said a hot dog had to be meat? But they ARE nice.

Definitely Not Mister Pops

You may quote me on that.

Hawkmumbler


M.I.K.

Synthetic meat means no reason to keep cows, which means no cows, which means to reason to have fields to keep cows in, which means less fields, which means less countryside which means large tracts of barren wastelands interspersed with densely populated areas with high unemployment, which means no reason to have fictional stories about such things because we'll all be living it, which means no Judge Dredd.

Is that what you want? 'Cos that's what'll happen!

Definitely Not Mister Pops

Quote from: M.I.K. on 05 August, 2013, 11:46:06 PM
Synthetic meat means no reason to keep cows, which means no cows, which means to reason to have fields to keep cows in, which means less fields...

That's the whole point though. Reduce clearing the rainforest for industrial cattle farms that ultimately produce fuckin' Big Macs.

Big Macs are a greater insult to Burgers than anything quorn have ever produced.
You may quote me on that.

Professor Bear

Quote from: M.I.K. on 05 August, 2013, 11:46:06 PM
Synthetic meat means no reason to keep cows

Tell that to the diary industry.

I eat more meat substitute now than I ever did as a veggie - it's just more pleasant an eating experience, and usually tastes nicer.  With "real" burgers or sausages you can practically taste the sawdust, ground-up skulls and pig knuckles.

Anyway, young me would never forgive me if he knew that the me living in the year 2013 wasn't eating some kind of synthetically-produced food substitute and was just gnawing on cheap sausages or mince all the time like a pauper.  You're on your own with bean burgers, though, which are just pointless and dreadful, ditto nut cutlets and store-brand meat substitute products, which are almost universally terrible to the point I once took some Asda veggie burgers back to the shop with no complaint beyond that they tasted like shit.

SuperSurfer

I quite like veggie sausages. I don't care that they copied the shape of their meat based predecessor.

What I do find highly offensive though are those cheap shit hotdog sausages which are all animal product but actually contain zero per cent meat. Bear that in mind when going for supermarket 'economy' ranges or buying from dodgy hotdog stalls.

M.I.K.

Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 06 August, 2013, 01:38:16 AM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 05 August, 2013, 11:46:06 PM
Synthetic meat means no reason to keep cows

Tell that to the diary industry.

They have synthetic milk in the future too, and all the rainforests have been bulldozed to make way for car-parks for all the cars which can't actually move anywhere anyway because of traffic jams and just sit parked all of the time which is why there needs to be so many car-parks because there are so many cars that there's no room for any actual roads, just car-parks and there are no diaries because there's no paper because there are no trees because all the rainforests have been chopped down to make way for car-parks, so they start making diaries out of synthetic meat instead, which means they start to pong a bit after a while and they're also a bit difficult to write on, so everyone decides it'd probably be a better idea to just blog instead, so they just do that.

Is that what you want? People blogging? Like savages?!?

(Note to self : I may need more sleep.)

Rog69

hmmm, I was thinking that it would be interesting to combine this technology with 3D printing.

Bacon replicator anyone?