Threadjacking!

[von Boom]

That would be "Wayne Rooney is for reals on fire."

Totes on fire perhaps.

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

There's only one sensible thing to do; we set Wayne Rooney on fire and listen out for the comments people make.

[Frank]

That would be "Wayne Rooney is for reals on fire."

Totes. The same nice lady explained the use of a word whose meaning is antithetical to that of the thought being expressed by insisting that it would sound really odd if folk went around saying "Wayne Rooney is figuratively on fire", but - if you're only using the word for the purposes of emphasis, rather than its actual meaning - what does it matter which word you use?

I think it sounds figuratively brilliant.

[Frank]

There's only one sensible thing to do; we set Wayne Rooney on fire and listen out for the comments people make.

As always, science shows us the way. Every experiment needs to demonstrate its results are reproducible, though; we'd need to set Luis Suarez and Carlos Tevez on fire too, just to be certain.

[Hoagy]

I reckon 'Israeli is going to go down in history as one of the most amazing 21st century comic book artists. Especially based on his black and white works. Revolutionary is a hard term to place over any modern comic book artist in historical terms, but 'Israeli should become known for just that.

[von Boom]

Why the fuck did these hill-billies cut the head off the snake in the first place? And where is the banjo music?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2013/aug/15/decapitated-copperhead-snake-bites-itself-video

[M.I.K.]

Why the fuck did these hill-billies cut the head off the snake in the first place? And where is the banjo music?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2013/aug/15/decapitated-copperhead-snake-bites-itself-video

And why does the Guardian think it constitutes news?

[Frank]

CHINESE ZOO PASSES OFF DOG AS LION

According to a report in the Beijing Youth Daily, the fraud came to light when a mother visited the zoo, in a park in the city of Louhe, to show her son the sounds different animals made. But when they got to the cage marked "African lion" - which had a sign describing the range and characteristics of the animal - they were shocked to hear the creature bark.

The chief of the park's animal department, Liu Suya, said that the dog - owned by one of the workers - was put in the cage when the real lion was sent away to a breeding centre, and the Tibetan mastiff temporarily placed in its cage because of safety concerns. Other species were also apparently mislabelled; there was a white fox in a leopard's den and another dog being passed off as a wolf.

[Spikes]

Why the fuck did these hill-billies cut the head off the snake in the first place? And where is the banjo music?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2013/aug/15/decapitated-copperhead-snake-bites-itself-video

And why does the Guardian think it constitutes news?

Indeed. A strange, and slightly sick video to be found newsworthy by them.

[The Doctor Alt 8]

CHINESE ZOO PASSES OFF DOG AS LION

According to a report in the Beijing Youth Daily, the fraud came to light when a mother visited the zoo, in a park in the city of Louhe, to show her son the sounds different animals made. But when they got to the cage marked "African lion" - which had a sign describing the range and characteristics of the animal - they were shocked to hear the creature bark.

The chief of the park's animal department, Liu Suya, said that the dog - owned by one of the workers - was put in the cage when the real lion was sent away to a breeding centre, and the Tibetan mastiff temporarily placed in its cage because of safety concerns. Other species were also apparently mislabelled; there was a white fox in a leopard's den and another dog being passed off as a wolf.

That, is a classic. I LOVE stories like this.

[von Boom]

Starting at a dojo near you - Kirk-fu.

http://io9.com/learn-to-fight-the-shatner-way-with-captain-kirks-top-1125250781

[Bubba Zebill]

CHINESE ZOO PASSES OFF DOG AS LION

According to a report in the Beijing Youth Daily, the fraud came to light when a mother visited the zoo, in a park in the city of Louhe, to show her son the sounds different animals made. But when they got to the cage marked "African lion" - which had a sign describing the range and characteristics of the animal - they were shocked to hear the creature bark.

The chief of the park's animal department, Liu Suya, said that the dog - owned by one of the workers - was put in the cage when the real lion was sent away to a breeding centre, and the Tibetan mastiff temporarily placed in its cage because of safety concerns. Other species were also apparently mislabelled; there was a white fox in a leopard's den and another dog being passed off as a wolf.

That, is a classic. I LOVE stories like this.

The dog wasn't lion. They was lion.

[Goaty]

That not lion, this is lion!

[Bubba Zebill]

That not lion, this is lion!

That cat not lion, Goaty is lion!

[Frank]

Why the fuck did these hill-billies cut the head off the snake in the first place? And where is the banjo music?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2013/aug/15/decapitated-copperhead-snake-bites-itself-video

And why does the Guardian think it constitutes news?

Because The Daily Mail Online has become the most popular newspaper site in the entire world by hawking pictures of pretty girls with their bits showing. Chasing the Animals Do The Craziest Things and Ewww - gross audience seems classy by comparison. Apparently, the print version of The Guardian loses around a million quid every single week, so I suppose they have to do something to make their online edition more attractive to advertisers here, and in the US particularly:

The Guardian lies second among British newspaper sites (behind the Mail, which cheerfully chases hits by aiming lower than its print sister) and in the top five in the world, rubbing shoulders with the New York Times. The Guardian's total traffic, around 67m unique browsers a month, was still rising by 60-70% a year.

A third of those readers are in America, which is an extraordinary achievement for a left-leaning British newspaper with its roots in Manchester. If, 15 years ago, anyone in British newspapers had predicted that the Guardian would soon find an audience of 20m in America, they would have been laughed out of the pub.

In terms of reach and impact, the Guardian is doing better than ever before. But its success may contain the seeds of its demise. Its print circulation is tumbling ... on a typical weekday, only 178,000 people buy the Guardian, while millions graze on it for nothing on their screens ... for three years running, the Guardian has been losing £100,000 a day.

http://moreintelligentlife.co.uk/content/ideas/tim-de-lisle/can-guardian-survive?page=full