Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments

[Darren Stephens]

We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

[Trout]

We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

[Darren Stephens]

We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

......yes. Yes he did.  :-/

[Trout]

We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

......yes. Yes he did.  :-/

What a wanker!

[Satanist]

We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

......yes. Yes he did.  :-/

What a wanker!

Pfft, You all need to "think outside the box" so we can "raise the bar" and "slice and dice" the facts to find out if "we're all singing from the same hymn sheet".

[Richmond Clements]

Sooner or later, one of them is going to say "Thinking outwith the box", and then I shall kill.

[Darren Stephens]

Heh, had a bit of a run in with him this morning. Every time I went to answer him, he put his hand up to shoosh me. I said "look, we can either have a conversation, or you can just carry on talking AT me." He carried on talking at me. It's going to be lots of fun working with this prat.  :/

[staticgirl]

You may find it more fun if you print out bullshit bingo cards and see which of your team gets there first...

[Tiplodocus]

Going forward? Have we recently invented a time macine? No, in which case, in which other direction did you think we could do them?


Watch out for " in the <insert noun> space".

[Colin Zeal]

I was at a meeting recently where someone was asked to "capture the information going forward." Which meant they had to take the minutes.

[Darren Stephens]

I hear that one all the time, Colin. Absolute nonsense. 

[Rog69]

Until recently I used to work with a real bell-end of a management drone who would take great delight in using the full range of corporate wank-words at any opportunity, he seemed to pick up a new one every week but would nearly always use them out of context.

A couple of colleagues and I set out to try and install the phrase "Boston Steamer" into his vocabulary by using it in a positive way whenever we spoke to him in the hope that he will use it in a meeting or something.

Sadly I left the job before I could enjoy the fruits of our labour.

[von Boom]

I can NEVER find a clean spoon when I need one.

[Spikes]

Despite making it through xmas largely cold free (i did catch a sniffle, but it dint really come to owt), ive have now caught a bit of a stinker.
Dang. And Dang again.

[COMMANDO FORCES]

Drokk! I've woken up after 3 hours sleep and feel refreshed. I don't know what to do!