Worst film you have ever watched

[Mr C]

Y'know, I'm surprised that no ones said Judge Dredd yet.

[Tiplodocus]

There is an awful lot wrong with MAYBE BABY.

But it does have a couple of good gags in it and Joely Richardson looking damned fine.

But it is so incredibly by the numbers (even for a romantic comedy - surely THE most predictable genre of film) that the writer and director should be ashamed of themselves.  There's an Onion article about how a bitter and angry comedian turns crap once he had a baby and I can't help thinking that they'd seen Ben Elton recently.

I never got to the end of CRASH because I got bored  - and not getting to the end of a film I set out to watch is pretty rare for me.  

CRASH is obviously not the worst film in the world so I'm not sure if I can class it below stuff starring J-LO which you really couldn't fucking drag me to see...

Or Charlie's Angels II and Tomb Raider II which I refuse to watch because of how bad the originals were.

[Mr C]

May I just say though, that Hawk the Slayer rocks?

[Bico]

Just Married - the only film I've ever walked out of that was playing IN MY OWN HOUSE.
I went out, bought some PS2 game for about three quid and played that instead.

[Richmond Clements]

Lawnmower Man made me wish I had eye cancer and couldn't see it.

It was the last time i let my wife choose the movie in the cinema.

[Hend-RE]

I'm going to give this a bit of qualification and say that this is the worst film I've ever watched through to the end; Equilibrium.  Fucking hated it.  

I'm sure I've watched worse but this really stick in my mind.  Made my blood boil that I'd wasted two hours of my life watching it.  

Can I add Vanilla Sky as well?

[dweezil2]

House of the dead-without doubt the most lazy, inept piece of cinematic excrement ever submitted to film. Except maybe for Four weddings and a fucking funeral- a film so mind numbingly tedious, it actually had the effect of making me physically ill.
Thanks, i feel better now.

[Adrian Bamforth]

Ben Elton is someone who frequently crosses a (thin blue) line, in that his stand up was often very funny and inventive but he somehow seems to think he is some kind of playwrite.

However, Maybe Baby has the WORST most desperate story idea ever: Elton's main character writes and puts on a play about his own fertility problems - just like Ben is doing!

He must have been slumped over his keyboard that night thinking: "What would my main character do? I know - he would write a play about his experiences! And this could put a great strain on their already-tense marriage, just like it is on mine!" etc etc

ADE

[The Enigmatic Dr X]

Damage

Braveheart

[Mike Carroll]

Arrgh! How could I have forgotten...

The Matrix Reloaded & The Matrix Revolutions

Right up there with Highlander II in the category of "packed with so much badness that it seeps back in time and taints the original"

Mike C

[Grant Goggans]

That crazed buffoon would be me, and I'm aware Suspiria has a considerable reputation, but I think it's the most incompentent pile of overrated tosh I've ever seen.

It's not frightening in the slightest, but it tries to be with incredibly overwrought sequences ruined by the acting and the dubbing - like that scene where, if I remember rightly, they've been relocated to the gym and one character is agonizingly telling the heroine about the person who breathed just-like-THAT! and neither of them bother to peek around the curtain and see who's behind the labored breathing.

When the plot isn't relying on hoary old chestnuts ("Gosh, I don't know who could have told you to go away when you arrived last night during the storm, please, come in"), it's making up ridiculous backstories for witches just to make the evildoers more ominous, or it's relying on bizarre incidents which are so absurd they go past outre and grotesque and into comical - like that room full of barbed wire.

The photography's terrible, the pacing's bad and then there's the central issue of what makes the film a big headache and chore to watch - that soundtrack.  It's like someone dropped a guitar down a flight of stairs.

More power to you if you find that nonsense appealing or actually frightening, but yeah, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about when I say that movie's an embarassing, laughable, unfrightening joke.

--Grant

[Wils]

The Matrix Reloaded & The Matrix Revolutions

And also like Highlander 2, they're dodgy sequels that I've managed not to actually see. :) Highlander and the Matrix were, IMO, great standalone films that *any* sequel would only have fucked with.

[Dunk!]

The Thin Red Line - Utter shite which had me proclaiming 'Oh for fucks sake!' in a crowded cinema 'cos I'd mistaken a fade to black for the end when we were only 2/3rds through. Sheesh.

Ace Ventura - Walked out when it reminded me that I'm going to die one day so every moment is precious and not be wasted on such crap.

[paulvonscott]

Wils, you're right there.  Matrix 2 and 3 are terrible, whereas I think The Matrix is a very entertaining movie.  Just avoid them, they are utter shite.  I'll happily watch the first movie again, but I'll skip the sequals in future.

[GermanAndy]

Highlander 2 IS terrible, no doubt.

but lately I watched CURSE OF THE FLY, because it had Brian Donlevy in a role. God, this was bad.

And of course such trash gems like BURIED ALIVE, the one with Donald Pleasance and Ginger Lynn Allen (don?t ask) or DANCE MACABRE with Robert Englund, which didn?t made any sense whatsoever.