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Topics - Thread Zero

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General / Arghh!
« on: 02 June, 2002, 07:12:22 AM »
Hershey sat in her office. She hadn't had a good day. If some respects, although she would never publicly admit it, being chief judge had become a bit of a chore. An endless routine of paperwork and meetings.

The Argutarian Ambassador one week, signing the amended goldfish vaccine bill, the next. Frankly it was getting a bit tiresome. Hershey yearned for the streets, to be out there in the heart of the city she now ruled over.

But it wasn't to be. More paperwork. In fact she had so much on her desk, maybe she could build a small block out of the damn stuff then watch as she knocked it over. Hmm...boredom she thought - the cancer of the mind.

There were advantages being chief judge, this were true of course, and power was the most heady of brews - but something was missing. Hershey sat there thinking what it was. What was lacking? Then it came to her. It was simple. Excitement. She wanted something exciting to do. Something that would test her mettle.

Pull a few 59'c, a strip search or two. Hell maybe just a litter rap offence. Something, anything to get her out of her office. But no, she had accepted the office of chief judge and that was that.

Hershey got up and walked over to the large plas windows of her grandiose office. She looked out onto the city, her magnificent city, and sighed. Power she mused, a deceptive thing indeed.

Maybe the future would test her, give her a challenge worthy of her position. Until then.....

Chief Judge's office 2124


Oh god not that again. Just quit with it scojo. QUIT it.

Ok sorry.

Do that again and I take the cat back to the rescue home. You have been warned.


Moo moo


Suggestions / Anyone fancy a mulit part Big Finish cd story?
« on: 02 June, 2002, 02:49:06 AM »
So I was sitting on the Bristol pavement, no ticket you see for this Comic convention thing, and I so wanted to see Little and Large too...

Anyway, I was sitting there and this idea popped into my head. How about a multi part Big Finish Cd in the future.

Instead of the one off format at the moment, the story continues on a second cd!

It would have to be a story worthy of 2 hours, but it's worth BF considering it.

Oh well about this comic convention. I hear the Krankies are on next and I do love my women in school uniform....


Off Topic / Star Wars 3 - print this out and keep it!
« on: 01 June, 2002, 08:33:40 AM »

It's the best thing I have seen on the net about the new trilogy.

I think George Lucas should read this before he shoots a single frame
of Episode 3!

Comment: It seems that Lucas still has quite a lot of plot to squeeze
into Ep III . . . it'll have to be at least 3 hours long. Consider: 1.
We have to see some more of the Clone Wars. 2. Anakin has to slowly
turn to the Dark Side. 3. Palpatine has to be made Emperor. 4. Anakin
has to pledge himself to the Emperor. 5. We have to finally learn more
about the Sith Lords, who they are, and how they came to be. 6. Anakin
& Padme's marriage has to start to fall apart. 7. Anakin's Turning
Point, where he becomes a Sith Lord. 8. Padme has to get pregnant. 9.
Padme has to be gotten away from Anakin before he finds out she's
preganant. 10. The children, once born, have to be adopted by the
Lars' and the Organas. 11. The Emperor must be revealed as Darth
Sidious. 12. The Sith Lords (presumably with the help of the clone
army) must wipe out the Jedi (presumably in a series of long,
protracted battles). 13. There must be a climactic battle between
Obi-Wan and Anakin, at the end of which Anakin must be so horrifically
wounded that he can only survive by wearing the mask for the rest of
his life. 14. Obi-Wan and Yoda must retreat to their respective hiding
places and await Luke's coming of age in Episode IV. 15. Anakin must
complete his transformation into Darth Vader by putting on the
costume, and dubbing in James Earl Jones' voice. Sounds like a hell of
a lot of plot for one movie. I just hope Lucas can pull it off.

So do....so do I!

Seriously, print this out and keep it for 3 years. After you see Episode 3, see if all the above is in the film!


Prog / Oh my grud. I have the real proof why star wars 2 is crap!
« on: 31 May, 2002, 08:19:16 PM »
Sorry to go on but I read this from another site.

Sidious want to use train Anakin as his apprentice in episode 3, right?

So why does he let Dooku chain Anakin to that pole to be eaten by the monsters?

He would be killed! No apprentice then for Sid!

As I say the plot is meaningless.

Lucas can't write a logical plot.

Argue that.


Off Topic / I'm with Brit Cit, who you with?
« on: 31 May, 2002, 06:34:04 PM »
Well England actually.

Yes it's World Cup time! Starts today.

So who's gonna win the cup?

Not England sadly.


Prog / I just saw Star Wars 2!!!
« on: 31 May, 2002, 02:10:44 AM »
Yeah, just seen it.

Well it is not bad at all!

The effects are amazing. The battle at the end between the clone armies is well, words can't describe it! Astonishing detail. Imagine your favourite war movie action sequence, set in the future. Thousands of clones killing each other. Worth seeing the film for that battle. Well done ILM! They deserve an Oscar.

The film is much darker then Phantom. I think someone told George to make it a little more mature and he listened! Hayden whats his name is good as Anakin. The acting and dialogue isn't that bad. The romance is not that bad either. Hayden does show Anakin's torment. As I say, a much darker tone is most welcome. Obi Wan is also the star of the film. Loads of action from him . That fight with Jango Fett on the rainy platform is very good. Who would have thought Bobba Fett's dad was Australian.:)

Not to sure about Anakin's father suddenly reappearing. Where was he in the first film? And why did George go for that silly virign birth plot device in ep 1? No mention of mitochloridians thingys and hardly any Jar Jar though! Hooray!

What else?

Hmm well the first action sequence is a bit like the first action sequence from my Dredd Reckoning. Ho hum.

The plot?

Well not that important really? The usual battles and battle for the force/senate stuff.

Of course deep down Lucas can't write a coherent plot to save his life! Why you ask?


Well at the end of both episodes, Darth Sidious has lost and yet he still seems victorious.
In Ep 1 he failed to get Queen Amidala to sign that treaty thingy and his army were forced off Naboo but he was smiling at the end, and in episode 2 his clone army are defeated and yet he says all is going to plan!


Geroge your plots don't make any sense. All this Count Dukoo really working for Darth Sidious twist lark. Don't make any sense. If Dukoo was working for Sidious all along, why are they pleased that their clone army was destroyed in the final scene but everything is going to plan?

Complete nonsense. Drivel.

Anyway I think it's the best Star Wars episode so far. Great fun, not bad acting, amazing visuals, and old muppet man Yoda does the light saber dance too! Funny that!

The blue screen effect still doesn't work. We all know the actors are not in front of the cgi backdrops and motion capture characters. Something to do with ILM not getting the focus and lighting right I guess.

Oh yeah one last thing...did you know that George Lucas is more or less making the same film over and over again.

Clever is George. None of the audience have sussed it out. But I have George....:)

I rate it the best Star Wars episode thus far. Meaningless plot but great fun. However take way ILM's magic and it may not be quite as good.

8.5 out of 10.


General / Could there be 2 mistakes in Sin City?
« on: 30 May, 2002, 03:28:48 PM »
Well being a writer I am into story structure. Now John 'the beast' Wagner is one of the best, no doubt about it. But....

Are these possible mistakes?








1] The female undercover judge was apparently killed by Joe. Remember? Now I think she's the one leading the undercover division. If she returns to Sin City, Linus could spot her. I guess she may not return. Just something to watch out for.

2} This week started with the discovery of Mega City 1 agent Yankee. Now I'm guessing John explains how he was discovered cos last week the judges were looking for him! It seems like there was a prog missing. My guess is, when they capture Danser, she will explain how she killed Yankee and hopefully we'll find out how the judges found him. It is a flashback technique used by writers. Just something we should watch out for.

Cos as it stands, there is a big gap in the cause and effect narrative. One minute the judges can't find Yankee - next minute, here he is!:)

Anyway, still enjoying the story.


General / Sneck! Strontium Dog is here!!!
« on: 30 May, 2002, 02:46:57 PM »
Got the big Finish cd this morning. Wow it came a few days early!

Had a little listen. First thing I noticed - it has a very groovy disco (yes disco!) theme tune. Better than Dredd's music!

Second thing is the scenes seem longer. Well the second scene is. Feels more like a film scene. Most of Dredd's were pretty short but this one has a nice pace to it. Just something I noticed.

The other great thing about it - there are no news breaks! I really think Dredd doesn't need Enigma Smith and her news items.

Anyway Simon Pegg seems fine as Johnny. He plays the character hard. Haven't heard the other characters yet.

But from what I heard, it sounds pretty good. Much potential.

scojo - Wanted dead for message board crimes. Earth Time Period: 21st century.  1 Million credits. Time job.

Search and Destroy Agency: Warrant no 346/72

Yes, not that one!

My new Comedy script.

Fart and Burp.

It's well good. About these two pensioners who go back in time and fight crime. They use nature's very own bodily functions to dispatch their victims. Hence the title!

Clever ain't I?

scojo great writer, bad at(f)art.

General / Good Luck
« on: 29 May, 2002, 05:11:45 PM »
I just thought I'd be a nice scojo and wish the Mongoose flock good luck with their new Dredd and Slaine RPG's.

I'm not into role playing, (well does being a casual transvestite count?) but if I can afford it, I may buy it. So I can look at all the piccys.

How many players do you need for a Dredd rpg to work?

Cos me and shooshi are here, and shooshi is one purrfect player.


General / It was always the same....
« on: 29 May, 2002, 05:09:59 AM »
The question was always the same. Someone would always bring it up. Dredd didn't mind. Originality was never the citizens strong point.

In those rare occasions when Dredd would do an interview for some trashy news zine show or rag tabloid, the same question would come up.

"Do judges fear death?"

Dredd wished he had some clever answer prepared. Some answer which was almost a question in itself. Deflecting the meaning back on the interviewer. But Dredd would be the first to admit he wasn't some quick witted nark like Max Normal. No, he just said things as he thought them. Simple, straight down the line. No ambiguity.

"Death is part of being a judge. When it comes, I will accept it."

Clear, to the point.

Then they would probe more, trying to see if he was telling the truth. Dredd knew all their cheap tactics. In different circumstances he would have booked them for salacious prying. Assuming such a crime existed.

"So you aren't scared of dying?"

Dredd was hesitant to repeat himself. Why say the same thing again. Not his problem if their hearing was defective. But Dredd felt different that day. Maybe years on the street had finally taken their toll, eroding his iron will. Now it was time for his humanity to show.

"I don't fear death but it is the great unknown. I value my life. As I'm sure you do. When death takes me, it will be because of the right circumstances. Upholding the law. Honourable."

The interview ended. Dredd left the news slug offices and went back on patrol. But the thought of death remained on his mind.

No one lives forever, this Joe knew, but for a second he felt a cold chill in his heart. Fear, the icy cold realization that he too would die one day. A most disturbing sensation.

The bike radio crackled out some crime item and Dredd's introspection was broken. Death would wait thought Dredd, at least for a few more hours.

Dredd raced down the skedway, his fate left unknown.

"Death is easy. I just put my hands in and sssqueeze."

Judge Death: Actual voice recording 2124



General / From Psi Division archives. Above top secret.
« on: 27 May, 2002, 10:00:29 PM »
Grand Halls of Justice.

To: H Volt.

Psi Division  202O,  4th Quarter Report.
Ref: 12A/54.

In the late fall of 2120, a number of grade 4 psi telepaths experienced strange, unsettling premonitions.  All were consistent in their description, sensing a strange alien presence seeking to destroy the very heart of Mega City One.

On further study, no telepath could elaborate on their findings. None could explain what form the creature took, or when it may appear.

The premonitions were later discounted as random psi blips; the term used to describe unsubstantiated psi predictions.

Psi Risk evaluation:

Psi Division Sub Chief Horner. July 2021





General / Sam Slade for big finish!!
« on: 27 May, 2002, 06:19:18 AM »
Apart from  this cool idea I have for a Dredd audio cd, I think Sam Slade should be given the B F treatment!

If Sam Slade isn't coming back to 2k, why not a one off audio cd instead?

There is loads of comedy potential. Sam, Stogie and Hoagy on some mad cap case in America or Brit Cit.

Could work. Yup!

Nemesis would be brilliant too.


For those of you who never heard the Death Trap! cd, here's some of the actual dialogue. It's a great scene and brings both characters to life. Written by David Bishop.

Death's just been released into the special cell. Dredd is doing a prisoner status check on him.

Ssso, you're back again? Hasss it been a year sssince your last visit?

Spare me the unpleasantries.

Ssso unfriendly. Anyone would think you wern't pleased to be here.

They'd be right.

You sssurprise me. Why are you here?

Your annual status check, as you well know.

Brusque and unfriendly. I doubt you get many visitors with sssuch a sssurly attitude.

I am not here to talk about me.

Oh but you're sso interesting Joe. In fact I think we're quite alike.


Oh yesss. We're both judges, we both enforce the law. Only our approachesss differ.

I am nothing like you.

Judge, jury and executioner, isn't that it? My methodsss are just more permanent.

(with feeling)
You murder people just for being alive.

(with feeling too)
But all life isss a crime. I'm sssure you can remember the rest. How many have you killed in your time, Joe? Hundredsss....thousandsss...

That isn't important.

Face it Joe, I'm just like you. Why waste money on iso cubes? Just kill the perpsss. Think of the crimess it would prevent.

(with feeling)
Murder is wrong no matter how you justify it.

Tell yourself that Joe, I'm not convinced. I will misss our little debatess.

What do you mean?

Didn't I sssay? I'll be leaving sssoon...(really chilling) and there'sss nothing you can do to ssstop me.


General / Here is the official website for the new 2k rpgs
« on: 27 May, 2002, 01:24:37 AM »
For all the latest on the new Judge Dredd and Slaine role playing games, go to:


The website is not available to those wearing silly pointed hats or called Gandalf.


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