Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments

[SmallBlueThing]

I slipped and fell downstairs, knocking a picture off the wall which smacked me in the head, and have injured my back, my arm and my ankle as a result. Oh BONKERS! (as my youngest son would say).

SBT

[House of Usher]

It's 9am and I'm sitting in a 'training centre' being told tyhe correct way to type a letter.

Where to put the date, your name, their name etc. Even, and I swear this is what they are talking about right now as I type, the correct way to space the digits in your mobile no.

You have to space them??? 

[Dunk!]

I have spent the morning being irradiated at the local hospital's X-ray department.

Fear that I now have a healthy glow.

Would make a Japan joke, but don't want to offend anyone.

Want folks to know I could've though.

[SuperSurfer]

Ever tried looking on an image library for a simple straight forward photo? I just need an image of a business man standing looking towards the camera but almost every photographer under the sun seems to think that people only ever need novelty photos. What a bunch of idiots.

Back to work now.

[Rog69]

In what is the latest episode in a long series of me eating stupidly spicy things when drunk, I agreed to try one of the worlds hottest chilli sauce's last night.

I am paying dearly for it today.

[Brigantian]

Sounds like you encountred a Sitchinite. Quite fond of Zach's books myself.

He claimed to have formed these theories "in 1964", and has suffered "decades of ridicule" as a result. Also claimed to have met Isaac Asimov in the seventies and spoken to him about them. He was very serious, but amusing, and owned the shop; so wasn't just a random loon.

SBT

Is it a specialist bookshop -eg occult and other weirdness ? Where in this blessed land might it be located ? Also sorry to hear you fell down the stairs but I'm sure I'm not the only to be amused by your pain. You've spread a little joy. Is laughter really the best medicine ? Yup, I feel better, it must be. Thanks Doc.

[exilewood]

because my keyboard is fucked. but, i did write an amazing song today. but not "your red china pussy made me blue" ,unfortunately, yap-shop friends.

Plus, as i was reading 'shakara' in this week's prog, everytime i read 'godwave', my brain [such as it is] read 'godpletonwave', which was quite un-nerving.

also,it's taken me at least 15 minutes to write this totallly pointless post with my screwed keyboard. it's friday night - what the fuck?

[SmallBlueThing]

Is it a specialist bookshop -eg occult and other weirdness ? Where in this blessed land might it be located ? Also sorry to hear you fell down the stairs but I'm sure I'm not the only to be amused by your pain. You've spread a little joy. Is laughter really the best medicine ? Yup, I feel better, it must be. Thanks Doc.

Heh- no, it's an "antiquarian bookshop" in London Road, St Leonards-On-Sea. One of those fantastic places that has teeny tiny walkways shovelled between cliff-faces of books always in danger of sliding down upon you. Like most of them, the owner seems to have forgotten that people actually need to be able to touch the books without them cascading down. I love places like that.

The last time I went in there, about twenty years ago, I was told by a different man that the books I wanted "would never be in here" because he "only sold collectible and antiquarian volumes", all the while looking at me like I was a piece of poo. Twenty years later, it's got a fairly big sci-fi/ horror section, walls of Beano annuals and a pleasantly mad owner.

SBT

[COMMANDO FORCES]

After getting an email stating that I'm £165 in credit with EON, today I get a letter saying that they are going to increase my direct debit.
Come Monday I shall be on the phone to these twats to have a polite conversation 

Does no fucker in this country do their job properly apart from me 

[Paul faplad Finch]

It's 9am and I'm sitting in a 'training centre' being told tyhe correct way to type a letter.

Where to put the date, your name, their name etc. Even, and I swear this is what they are talking about right now as I type, the correct way to space the digits in your mobile no.

You have to space them??? 

Oh yes. Because the human brain is so accustomed to the landline method of 5-3-3 that if you simply put all of the digits together, without spaces, the person reading the letter CAN NOT RECOGNISE THEM AS A PHONE NUMBER. This is apparently a FACT, proven by science.

I tell you, that place is absolute torture on the tongue, the amount of time I spend biting it. Oh for the last day, when my benefits no longer rely on their good will.

[TordelBack]

Oh yes. Because the human brain is so accustomed to the landline method of 5-3-3 that if you simply put all of the digits together, without spaces, the person reading the letter CAN NOT RECOGNISE THEM AS A PHONE NUMBER. This is apparently a FACT, proven by science.

How are shooting sprees as rare as they are?

[Emp]

After getting an email stating that I'm £165 in credit with EON, today I get a letter saying that they are going to increase my direct debit.
Come Monday I shall be on the phone to these twats to have a polite conversation  

EON are constantly trying it on with me in the winter....."your consumption has increased so we will increase your direct debits" and every year i have to phone them and point out that i use less in the summer and it all evens out. they never call at the hiegt of summer to say that im using less and would i like to pay less. Strange that

[Darren Stephens]

Because I've just been walking around town, in and out of shops, even saw a hot grl I work with...all the while unaware I had a chocalate button smear down my shirt. A brown one....

[SmallBlueThing]

Ha! That's nothing- nothing, i say! i once left my flat in dublin on a sunny day, wandered into town, went to several shops, had a drink in a nice pub, spent a pleasant morning all told, then went to meet my wife (then my girlfriend) from work, only for her to notice i had a pair of her bright pink panties stuck to the velcro strap of my new rock boot.
SBT

[worldshown]

After getting an email stating that I'm £165 in credit with EON, today I get a letter saying that they are going to increase my direct debit.
Come Monday I shall be on the phone to these twats to have a polite conversation  

EON are constantly trying it on with me in the winter....."your consumption has increased so we will increase your direct debits" and every year i have to phone them and point out that i use less in the summer and it all evens out. they never call at the hiegt of summer to say that im using less and would i like to pay less. Strange that

They're all trying it on.

Last Saturday, I received a bill from British Gas for £230 just a month after paying the winter gas bill. They claimed to have read the meter on Thursday the 10th (unlikely as I was in work and I am the sole occupant of my house) though instead of reading the meter they apparently picked a number at random from the phone book and put that down.

Surprised to find that they didn't deny that their meter reading was probably made up and they took the correct reading over the phone.

Still had to pay £23 about two months before it was due.