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General Chat => Off Topic => Topic started by: Bouwel on 10 August, 2009, 11:08:13 AM

Title: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 10 August, 2009, 11:08:13 AM
Well, you did ask for it.

Today I went looking for a pencil pot in Tesco. they didn't have any.

Darn.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 August, 2009, 11:30:14 AM
Quote from: Bouwel on 10 August, 2009, 11:08:13 AM

Today I went looking for a pencil pot in Tesco. they didn't have any.

What -- exactly -- is wrong with a mug?

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 10 August, 2009, 11:41:00 AM
A good point well made. A mug it is.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:42:44 AM
You can never be too sure that the residue of previous occupying liquids has been fully expunged. Coffee flavoured pencils may sound delicious, but then you keep sucking them and you die of lead poisoning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 August, 2009, 11:56:21 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:42:44 AM
You can never be too sure that the residue of previous occupying liquids has been fully expunged. Coffee flavoured pencils may sound delicious, but then you keep sucking them and you die of lead poisoning.

You're a glass-half-empty kind of guy, aren't you? I can tell ...

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 August, 2009, 12:00:34 PM
No-one ever died of repeatedly ingesting minute quantities of clay and graphite. So there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 10 August, 2009, 12:04:13 PM
My colleague who usually gets the milk in is on holiday.
So I sit here sans tea and the shop is all of 300m away.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 10 August, 2009, 01:03:25 PM
I hung some pictures in my living room this morning and one is just a tiny bit lower than the others.

How mildly annoying.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 August, 2009, 01:58:21 PM
The petrol station where I often grab coffee in the morning has stopped their rather excellent coffee-and-a-muffin combo deal.  And this on a day when I was too lazy to bring my flask.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 10 August, 2009, 02:13:28 PM
My trousers have been washed with a piece of paper in the back pocket. So now I have a pocket lined with flaky paper. I'm slightly peeved.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 August, 2009, 02:25:50 PM
I just went for a walk (in the rain) to deliver my step-grandson's birthday present.

He wasn't in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 10 August, 2009, 03:31:54 PM
I've eaten something that has slightly upset my stomach, giving me tremendously bad wind. And tonight is "date night". Married squaxx will understand my mild annoyance.

Steev
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 August, 2009, 03:35:04 PM
Quote from: SpookyTheCat on 10 August, 2009, 03:31:54 PM
And tonight is "date night". Married squaxx will understand my mild annoyance.

You're weird. My wife and I eat dates whenever we feel like it, without having to specify a special night for it.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 10 August, 2009, 03:42:18 PM
I can't help thinking a whole night on the dates is going to compound your wind problem Steev.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 August, 2009, 03:47:10 PM
And keep an eye on the monkey - if he keels over do not eat the dates, even if you've already thrown them in the air with a view to catching them in your mouth. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 August, 2009, 04:18:26 PM
Quote from: SpookyTheCat on 10 August, 2009, 03:31:54 PM
I've eaten something that has slightly upset my stomach, giving me tremendously bad wind. And tonight is "date night". Married squaxx will understand my mild annoyance.

Steev

I hate to imagine what would happen if your stomach was seriously upset or inconsolable.

Try drinking some Prune juice as it will calm down your stomach considerably.This bit of advice if heeded will please and satisfy my childish and destructive personality considerably.

Also you might have to cancel the date you have fixed up for tonight especially if it is the first date you have with this person as you might not create a very good first impression and when you are on a date first impressions count.Give her plenty of notice as girls dont like being stood up.

I am not married but i can understand your annoyance over this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 August, 2009, 09:38:20 PM
I've come back to work to discover that my company no longer deems it acceptable for me to have my ID swipe card attached to my belt on one of those retractable elastic thingies that they issued me with, but that it ABSOLUTELY MUST be worn around my neck on a bright blue lanyard (I even hate the word 'lanyard') so that it gets tangled with my headset lead, clatters on my desk and keyboard and makes me look like a tit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 10 August, 2009, 11:24:06 PM
Quote from: dandontdare on 10 August, 2009, 09:38:20 PM
I've come back to work to discover that my company no longer deems it acceptable for me to have my ID swipe card attached to my belt on one of those retractable elastic thingies that they issued me with, but that it ABSOLUTELY MUST be worn around my neck on a bright blue lanyard (I even hate the word 'lanyard') so that it gets tangled with my headset lead, clatters on my desk and keyboard and makes me look like a tit.

I feel your pain, brother. My company have issued "identity cards", ostensibly so if we are in the community with service users who are displaying challenging behaviour, we can flash them and reassure the general public that any techniques we may use to "calm them down" are in the best interests of the person involved and they should not be alarmed.

I made my disssatisfaction with the design very clear at template stage. But ohhhh no, I was overruled by a fucking idiot.

Hence, I now have a little laminated card with my picture on it, which states in big bold letters "This person has an Autistic Spectrum Disorder and/ or Learning Disability". No I bloody don't, but the person I am with might.

Useful in getting into cinemas cheap, I guess- but not overly professional!

Steev

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:24:39 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 August, 2009, 12:00:34 PM
No-one ever died of repeatedly ingesting minute quantities of clay and graphite. So there.

What do you think causes syphilis?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 August, 2009, 11:28:21 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:24:39 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 August, 2009, 12:00:34 PM
No-one ever died of repeatedly ingesting minute quantities of clay and graphite. So there.

What do you think causes syphilis?

An infection from the Treponema Pallidum bacterium.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 August, 2009, 11:28:45 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:24:39 PM


What do you think causes syphilis?

Shagging your Mum, mostly.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:32:20 PM
My mum has been dead for 3 years.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 August, 2009, 11:39:28 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:32:20 PM
My mum has been dead for 3 years.

Should probably have cleared up by now, then. Result!

Quickly, Manuel! The shovel

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 August, 2009, 11:44:33 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:32:20 PM
My mum has been dead for 3 years.
And you've only just found the bagels?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 11 August, 2009, 12:45:02 AM
Jim found the bagels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 August, 2009, 07:27:30 AM
Not the first place I'd have looked meself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 11 August, 2009, 08:50:01 AM
  ;D And there goes a mouthful of toast all over my laptop.

Cheers guys!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 11 August, 2009, 12:57:53 PM
My small cut on the end of the right pointing digit is mildly annoying and when it hardens/heals it HAS to be bitten starting the whole thing off again
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 August, 2009, 04:49:20 PM
I took a long walk back home from work today and needed a drink. I decided to try one of those new fangled JD & Coke cans but the lady behind the counter at the Tesco Express looked at me like I was something she'd stepped on. I wasn't aware that we were living under prohibition.

Also this morning I accidently stepped on a slug.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 11 August, 2009, 08:37:32 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 11 August, 2009, 04:49:20 PM

Also this morning I accidently stepped on a slug.

Keep stepping. The buggers are eating my courgettes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 11 August, 2009, 08:48:28 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 11 August, 2009, 08:37:32 PM
The buggers are eating my courgettes.

Plastic cup with an inch or so of beer in the bottom. sink the cup into the soil so that it's flush with ground level. Come the morning, you'll have a cup (or several cups, if your veg patch is of a size to require it) full of drowned slugs and, in theory, unmunched courgettes.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eric Plumrose on 11 August, 2009, 09:49:10 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 11 August, 2009, 08:48:28 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 11 August, 2009, 08:37:32 PM
The buggers are eating my courgettes.
Plastic cup with an inch or so of beer in the bottom. sink the cup into the soil so that it's flush with ground level. Come the morning, you'll have a cup (or several cups, if your veg patch is of a size to require it) full of drowned slugs and, in theory, unmunched courgettes.

If that doesn't work, try sprinkling broken egg shell over the surrounding soil.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 11 August, 2009, 10:02:04 PM
Quote from: Eric Plumrose on 11 August, 2009, 09:49:10 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 11 August, 2009, 08:48:28 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 11 August, 2009, 08:37:32 PM
The buggers are eating my courgettes.
Plastic cup with an inch or so of beer in the bottom. sink the cup into the soil so that it's flush with ground level. Come the morning, you'll have a cup (or several cups, if your veg patch is of a size to require it) full of drowned slugs and, in theory, unmunched courgettes.

If that doesn't work, try sprinkling broken egg shell over the surrounding soil.

And if THAT doesn't work, an all-night vigil with a very small shotgun.

Steev
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 August, 2009, 11:07:32 PM
Before strawberry plants completely covered all the soil on my boarders I used to put out slug traps. Glass jars rather than plastic cups. When I had to empty them the stench was terrible. Glad I don't have to do that any more. My tip: stop growing courgettes. Grow strawberries instead. The slugs won't be interested in them until they turn pink. Pick them before they turn red and you'll get to eat them yourself instead of the slugs getting the best of them. Pinkish strawberries ripen up okay indoors, even in the fridge.

Slug traps stink like bloody heck, but they're quite effective. Or you can grow comfrey, which slugs will apparently eat in preference to anything else. So they say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 11 August, 2009, 11:10:52 PM
One of my very favourite things about this board, is the way it can take the most unexpected turns. I mean, there's thread drift, and then there's a thread about life's irritations turning into Gardener's Question Time.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 11 August, 2009, 11:16:52 PM
Funny story - we had to abandon the fruit and veggie garden this year because my 6 year old daughter started "snail collecting", hunting for snails with pretty shells and keeping them in a small aquarium I bought her (I know, I know, but it's terribly difficult for a daddy to resist his little girl as some of you may well know). Anyway, she was so mortified by the dead snails and slugs that for the sake of her potential pets, I called it quits for this season  :-[.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 August, 2009, 11:37:20 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 11 August, 2009, 11:10:52 PM
One of my very favourite things about this board, is the way it can take the most unexpected turns. I mean, there's thread drift, and then there's a thread about life's irritations turning into Gardener's Question Time.

Cheers!

Jim

And it's all thanks to me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 12 August, 2009, 12:07:53 AM
I think most of us thank your mum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 12 August, 2009, 07:40:58 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 11 August, 2009, 11:37:20 PM
And it's all thanks to me.

Like most of this board's pleasures, it's despite you.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 12 August, 2009, 09:30:34 AM
You also get various other creatures in you jars...This season I've had a bbay mouse and a small frog, as jim says the smell at emptying time is ripe but worth it for the veggies. An odd slug patrol at night with a torch also helps.

Nonstop fresh salads, and to come: Cauiflower, courgettes (got a great recipe for summer courgette soup if you want it), carrots, Parsnips, onions, basil, leeks, neeps and cucumbers all on the go too

Should be on the other thread, but my first Butternut squash has appeared overnight and I'm strangely proud  ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 12 August, 2009, 10:04:41 AM
And try to attract a hedgehog to your garden. Cute for the kids to watch, and hungry for slugs in the meantime.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DavidXBrunt on 12 August, 2009, 10:11:24 AM
A colleague and I spent a smashing afternoon yesterday with our clients picking the potatoes we'd planted earlier in the year. A small but satisfying crop for a minute investment of time and energy. We'll be doing it properly next year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 August, 2009, 10:40:06 AM
I suppose I'm fortunate that the only vertebrates that can get into my garden are birds, as all the gardens in my neighbourhood are walled; so no mice. There was a rat once, but it disappeared again within minutes; presumably it scrambled over a wall. There's a hedgehog hospital in my town and because they're always eager to hear from people who could give a recuperating hedgehog a home it would be possible to borrow one from them. I must do that one day, as we have far too many slugs.

Squashes and pumpkins are very easy to grow, but you need to start them early (in pots until they get big enough to survive in the ground), and they need plenty of soil and room to grow and daily watering. I say get them in early (no later than March) because the more growing time they have the better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 12 August, 2009, 11:41:29 AM
Cheers for the tips, guys. Anything that prevents another scene like this...

(http://i205.photobucket.com/albums/bb239/worldshown/slugattack2.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 12 August, 2009, 11:51:43 AM
The horror!

I'll say I've never had a decent meal incorporating corgette, but that may be down to my mediocre cooking skills.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 12 August, 2009, 04:08:27 PM
Corgette is pretty good fried and added to a salad.

Now marrow on the other hand! What a worthless mouthful of watery pulp (steady Roger).
I've only ever enjoyed marrow when it was stuffed with mince and onion, and that was because it totally masked the taste of marrow.

"Botanically, however, the zucchini is an immature fruit, being the swollen ovary of the female zucchini flower."

Sick I call it, no wonder everyone hates them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 August, 2009, 04:12:36 PM
I have a mild cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 12 August, 2009, 04:19:29 PM
Quote from: Minkyboy on 12 August, 2009, 04:08:27 PM
Corgette is pretty good fried and added to a salad.

I always struggled with courgette until my wife started to fry them. Now glad to report no problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 August, 2009, 06:55:40 PM
I had a meeting arranged for this evening at 7.00pm about some work and it has been cancelled which is annoying because i have been building up to it all day.Of course i got the call that it was off at 2pm when i was out so i hadnt bothered to check voicemail until now and of course now the meeting has been forwarded to Thursday  at a time when i cant attend the meeting because i am doing something else which is unavoidable.

Eventually we will get there.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 August, 2009, 11:27:36 AM
The new TV, stand & Blu-ray player are all next to me in the dining room and like a twat I'm waiting on some HDMI cables coming in the post (they were a LOT cheaper). Please let them turn up today.

I knew I should have ordered them earlier >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 12:05:28 PM
Re: courgettes, not minor impediments...

Being vegetarian, a lot of my meals start off with a diced onion in a pan with a press of garlic, a splash of oil and a splash of water. It may end up as curry, risotto, stir-fry, spaghetti sauce, salsa, couscous, cottage pie, chilli or mousaka.

Courgette can go in any of that lot. The time to put the courgette in is at the start, with the onions.

But if you want to eat courgette as a vegetable, I'd recommend either slicing it lengthways to go in a stir-fry, frying it in butter or oil, or roasting it in the oven with some other Mediterranean vegetables.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 13 August, 2009, 12:07:34 PM
...because 'Unsubscribe Requests' never work.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 13 August, 2009, 12:34:02 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 12:05:28 PM
Re: courgettes, not minor impediments...

Being vegetarian, a lot of my meals start off with a diced onion in a pan with a press of garlic, a splash of oil and a splash of water. It may end up as curry, risotto, stir-fry, spaghetti sauce, salsa, couscous, cottage pie, chilli or mousaka.

Again, Usher, you surprise me. I'm a vegetarian as well, and it sounds as though most of our cooking begins the same way. I use a lot of onions, peppers and garlic, and sometimes courgettes, though I'm not the biggest fan and can do without.

Our garden is usually heavy on the cucumbers, lettuce, tomatoes and peppers. Last year we tried carrots, but my daughter weeded most of them bu mistake!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 02:16:12 PM
Tip for the meat-eaters: A delicious way of eating up courgettes is to slice 'em and fry them off in some oil and water with an onion, some garlic and lots of little chopped-up bits of grilled or uncooked bacon. I don't know which works best, grilling first or not, as I haven't cooked or eaten bacon in 20 years. But it's a way to get the best out of courgettes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2009, 03:24:07 PM
I just cut myself shaving while having a bath its only a tiny cut on the edge of my nose but the bastard wont stop bleeding so i had to stick sellotape over the cut in an attempt to stop the bleeding and it looks a mess and i have to leave the house in 15 minutes .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 August, 2009, 03:26:10 PM
You need a Styptic pencil.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: WoD on 13 August, 2009, 04:14:26 PM
Quote from: peterwolf on 13 August, 2009, 03:24:07 PM
I just cut myself shaving while having a bath its only a tiny cut on the edge of my nose but the bastard wont stop bleeding so i had to stick sellotape over the cut in an attempt to stop the bleeding and it looks a mess and i have to leave the house in 15 minutes .

You shave your nose Peter??  Put ice on it, it'll help.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 05:46:36 PM
Poor Peter. But LOL @ 'sellotape'! - reminds of an old strip that appeared in Viz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 August, 2009, 05:49:25 PM
To the vegetarians: whatever it is you're cooking... it needs bacon in it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 13 August, 2009, 05:52:04 PM
We've got facon, Trouty!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 August, 2009, 05:53:39 PM
Not the same. Also, courgettes taste bloody awful.

Someone had to say it.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 05:59:17 PM
I agree, pretend bacon isn't the same. It has its uses, like it goes nicely with scrambled egg on toast, which is how I had it for lunch today. You can't fry it up with courgettes though.

In which case, I advocate frying off the onions, courgette and garlic with some mushrooms and green peppers and the oxo cube of your choice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2009, 06:08:43 PM
I wasnt actually shaving my nose as i havent quite got that much of a problem with hair but it was just in the corner where my nose starts if that makes any sense.It was a new razor and i was rushing at the time.The sellotape did do the trick though but only because i have run out of Gaffer tape.Gaffer tape is my first aid kit if i cut myself at work  .I dont know much about styptic pencils so i will look it up.


Courgettes are not bad as part of an italian tomatoe sauce and not bad sliced thinly on a pizza.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 13 August, 2009, 06:09:48 PM
Tonight I'm grilling up some fantastic portobello mushroom sandwiches. Went to the market, bought some fresh bread, mozarella cheese, peppers, onions and (of course) portobellos. Add some spices, grill and it's wonderful!

Facon and other fake meats have their uses, but we don't rely on them much. During the summer when we grill outside, we do tend to eat the fake kielbasa and burgers, but that's about it. Oh, and we'll have vegetarian tacos from time to time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 13 August, 2009, 06:14:07 PM
Gardeners question time and now cooking with locusts, great thread!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 13 August, 2009, 06:18:09 PM
Quote from: Minkyboy on 13 August, 2009, 06:14:07 PM
Gardeners question time and now cooking with locusts, great thread!

I suppose picky locusts are rare...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 13 August, 2009, 06:20:50 PM
Today I stepped in an enormous pile of dogshit, because I was walking over the Hill reading my Fortean Times (cheers Sefton, for reminding me I hadn't picked it up in far too long). When I had removed all the shit from my trainer, I got home to find my youngest son, Bela, had taken the free "dalek slime" that he got with Dr Who Adventures comic today, and shoved it all in his pants "to see what it felt like".

Steev
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 06:24:25 PM
A charming tale indeed, which his parents and now the entire population of cyberspace, can remind him of when he's in his mid-teens and dating.

;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 August, 2009, 06:44:08 PM
Bought Watchmen on Blu-ray this afternoon (just tested it on the new set up ) and the bloody box is broken inside so the 2nd & 3rd disc tray falls out!
Off to HMV tomorrow for an exchange   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 August, 2009, 07:17:36 PM
Compy didn't work for a coupla hours.

All vegetables are gross.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 August, 2009, 07:32:20 PM
Quote from: SpookyTheCat on 13 August, 2009, 06:20:50 PM
Today I stepped in an enormous pile of dogshit, because I was walking over the Hill reading my Fortean Times (cheers Sefton, for reminding me I hadn't picked it up in far too long). When I had removed all the shit from my trainer, I got home to find my youngest son, Bela, had taken the free "dalek slime" that he got with Dr Who Adventures comic today, and shoved it all in his pants "to see what it felt like".

Steev

After the gardener's question time interlude (very informative) that made me laugh like a twat after a particularly bad day, cheers mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 13 August, 2009, 08:11:24 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2009, 12:05:28 PM
Being vegetarian, a lot of my meals start off with a diced onion in a pan with a press of garlic, a splash of oil and a splash of water. It may end up as curry, risotto, stir-fry, spaghetti sauce, salsa, couscous, cottage pie, chilli or mousaka.
Astounding. I'm the least vegetarian person your likely to meet and much of my cooking starts off the same way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2009, 08:11:54 PM
25 spam emails in my inbox but i dont remember signing up for spam.

I also get loads of spam calls because of my telephone number.I usually dont pick up when i know its a spam call because i can tell because of some kind of ESP that i have but when i do pick up and its a spam call and i am constantly amazed at peoples rudeness sometimes.

For example yesterday i answered a spam call and the person on the other end just says "I want some results !!..." so i said who are you and what results are you talking about ? and also asked them who they were and who they wanted to talk and reminded them that is common courtesy to introduce themselves before barking orders down the line at me because they were too rude and presumptious to realise they had dialed the wrong number which i obviously pointed out to them but they were too rude and lazy and discourtious to apologise for.

I just dont know WTF is wrong with people sometimes.Politeness may be unfashionable elsewhere but its still in as far as i am concerned.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 August, 2009, 11:07:17 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 13 August, 2009, 08:11:24 PM
Astounding. I'm the least vegetarian person your likely to meet and much of my cooking starts off the same way.

Such has been the influence of Mediterranean cooking on British kitchens in the past 30 years. I think meat-eaters have a greater range of options for getting started, though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 August, 2009, 11:25:18 AM
...discovered and half-read a superb Alex Robinson GN (Tricked) newly shelved in the local Library last night (when I should have been working), but when I went to check it out I didn't have my library card with me. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 August, 2009, 02:09:15 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 14 August, 2009, 11:07:17 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 13 August, 2009, 08:11:24 PM
Astounding. I'm the least vegetarian person your likely to meet and much of my cooking starts off the same way.

Such has been the influence of Mediterranean cooking on British kitchens in the past 30 years. I think meat-eaters have a greater range of options for getting started, though.

Mine always starts the same way except i always fry onions etc in butter and i never add the olive oil until last if i am making italian sauces.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 August, 2009, 05:29:03 PM
Impediments involving slime, day #2.

Youngest son, having had the slime removed from his underpants, today decided to shove it down inside the radiator. Have you ever tried to get slime out of a radiator armed only with chopsticks? It's tricky.

Steev
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 August, 2009, 05:54:23 PM
I advertised a double bed on Freecycle to get rid of it. I let the first person have it who asked for it, on the understanding they would take it Friday night or some time on Saturday. They still haven't given us a definite time to collect, but since we agreed to give it to them we've had another 10 requests from people who could have taken it off our hands yesterday. I've still got it, it's taking up room on the landing and I'm having to work around it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 14 August, 2009, 06:38:06 PM
Yeah Freecycle can be like that. Both on offering and collecting it is somewhat of a lottery.

I went to pick up some old lino the other week to put on the allotment to keep the weeds down. There was about a transit full of rotting, crumbly cack that disintegrated when you lifted it. Useless for anything but someone freecycled it to save the bother of having to move it to the dump themselves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 August, 2009, 06:50:31 PM
 :D Couldn't even get rid of one cheap red wine velour 3-seater sofa on Freecycle, nor a three-piece suite of similar description. Eventually the neighbours took the 3-piece for their son's new flat, but nobody wanted the single sofa. We offered it to Track 2000, a recycling charity/business, but they wanted £10 to take it. Finally we phoned the council and put it out in the rain for the dustmen, under cover of as much sheet plastic as we could find.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 August, 2009, 07:14:45 PM
Wanted a scone but they all fell apart.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 14 August, 2009, 07:50:40 PM
I got a takeaway curry tonight but traffic meant it wasn't quite hot enough when I got home.

It was still nice, though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 August, 2009, 08:12:42 PM
I was just having a rummage in the bins outside the charity shop down the road.Its usually full of books and other bric-a-brac and i get good stuff out of it sometimes.

Anyway as i was going through the bin this guy who i know well enough to say hello to in the street who is/was the chairman of the commitee who run the Royal Albert Hall walked past and gave me a look of complete disdain and didnt say hello just because i was leafing through books that were thrown away in a bin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 August, 2009, 08:36:10 PM
If it isn't books out of bins it's pizza off the pavement, what are you like Peter ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 August, 2009, 08:43:33 PM
Someone else came for the bed by 8pm, so it's not all bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 August, 2009, 09:52:29 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 14 August, 2009, 06:50:31 PM
:D Couldn't even get rid of one cheap red wine velour 3-seater sofa on Freecycle, nor a three-piece suite of similar description. Eventually the neighbours took the 3-piece for their son's new flat, but nobody wanted the single sofa. We offered it to Track 2000, a recycling charity/business, but they wanted £10 to take it. Finally we phoned the council and put it out in the rain for the dustmen, under cover of as much sheet plastic as we could find.
Reminds me of the chap who put out a fridge out with the sign "free to a good home". No response. Changes sign to "fridge for sale - £30 o.n.o." and it was stolen within a day.

I'm lucky to live in a neighbourhood where "community recycling" (ie put something out by the bins and it'll be lucky to last till bin day) is still common, despite increasing yuppification.

Oh and Pete - getting a funny look when spotted rummaging through the bins? - who'da thunk it?  ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 14 August, 2009, 09:56:01 PM
Freecycle is an excellent idea. All our Sophies baby clothes have gone to good homes via this.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 August, 2009, 10:23:50 PM
Truly a great idea.  Our forthcoming sprog is already equipped with cot and buggy thanks to Freecycle.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2009, 01:37:30 PM
Quote from: dandontdare on 14 August, 2009, 09:52:29 PM

Reminds me of the chap who put out a fridge out with the sign "free to a good home". No response. Changes sign to "fridge for sale - £30 o.n.o." and it was stolen within a day.

I'm lucky to live in a neighbourhood where "community recycling" (ie put something out by the bins and it'll be lucky to last till bin day) is still common, despite increasing yuppification.

Oh and Pete - getting a funny look when spotted rummaging through the bins? - who'da thunk it?  ;D


There is plenty of community recycling here and its easy to get rid of stuff that way.

As for the bins i was one of or the first to start going through the charity shop bins but now loads of others have started doing the same thing.Its like a lucky dip as you never know what you will find as its insane what this particular shop throws away.I have got loads of books out of this bin before.

I know what it must have looked like but i thought as i was looking through books then it wouldnt have looked so bad.

Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 August, 2009, 08:36:10 PM
If it isn't books out of bins it's pizza off the pavement, what are you like Peter ;)

Dont say anything about leftovers or Kebabs

;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 August, 2009, 09:50:40 PM
I suffered a painful under-thumbnail cut today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 15 August, 2009, 10:10:23 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 15 August, 2009, 09:50:40 PM
I suffered a painful under-thumbnail cut today.

MEDIC!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 August, 2009, 11:50:41 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 August, 2009, 07:14:45 PM
Wanted a scone but they all fell apart.
That's not how it's pronounced.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 August, 2009, 03:06:00 PM
My laptop is on the fritz.  >:(

After the Windows XP loading page it glitches and reverts back to the manufacturer's logo; repeat ad infinitum. Grrr. Now I'm having to log on via a borrowed machine. Note this doesn't qualify for the 'life spugs because...' thread. It's a very minor thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 16 August, 2009, 08:22:22 PM
I've just pulled a splinter out of my finger nail, it went all the way down, bastard it hurt.








V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 17 August, 2009, 08:51:21 AM
Just hiding [spoiler]a reference to Slaine [/spoiler] here, [spoiler]in the hope of driving Tordel insane.[/spoiler]

;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 August, 2009, 08:59:51 AM
[spoiler]Nice try[/spoiler], Trout, [spoiler]but you're too late[/spoiler].
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 17 August, 2009, 09:01:09 AM
You have to sleep sometime...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 17 August, 2009, 04:15:22 PM
Does any reference to Ukko count as well.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 17 August, 2009, 04:19:22 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 17 August, 2009, 04:15:22 PM
Does any reference to Ukko count as well.





V

TordelBack will have to PM Thryllseekr and find out for us.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 August, 2009, 05:31:52 PM
QuoteDoes any reference to Ukko count as well.

I'm not revealing the terms of our solemn compact.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 August, 2009, 01:34:31 AM
I went back to a forum or a Yahoogroup thing called the Massimo Belardinelli Group which sadly never really got off the ground.I joined it but didnt participate in it very much and left and never went back because there was no activity.

Today i attempted to sign into it again to read what few posts there were and found out i have been banned from the group for no apparent reason as like i say i hardly posted anything and didnt participate.

???
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 August, 2009, 07:24:46 AM
It was because you mentioned Slaine, a lot ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 18 August, 2009, 08:08:44 AM
I went back to a forum or a Yahoogroup thing called the Massimo Belardinelli Group

Peterwolf; I'm a member of the same group. Although my account is still active there's been no significant activity there in over a year and the group's been abandoned by its creator.

You're not missing anything. Not even Slaine.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 August, 2009, 12:40:45 PM
I was on fire at five a side last night but managed to come crashing down and hurt my back which is spoiling an otherwise enjoyable 45th birthday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 18 August, 2009, 01:35:27 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 18 August, 2009, 12:40:45 PM
I was on fire at five a side last night but managed to come crashing down and hurt my back which is spoiling an otherwise enjoyable 45th birthday.

If being on fire is only a minor impediment, Tippy, I'd hate to run into you on a day that spugs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 August, 2009, 05:05:21 PM
Quote from: Bouwel on 18 August, 2009, 08:08:44 AM
I went back to a forum or a Yahoogroup thing called the Massimo Belardinelli Group

Peterwolf; I'm a member of the same group. Although my account is still active there's been no significant activity there in over a year and the group's been abandoned by its creator.

You're not missing anything. Not even Slaine.

-Bouwel-

It was a shame that really.

I still dont get why i was banned though as i wasnt offensive to anyone on there as far as i can remember.

I dont know if it could be revived again or not.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 18 August, 2009, 05:54:34 PM
This is very near where I live...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/glasgow_and_west/8207830.stm

I have just been informed I may not be allowed home tonight depending on what the chemical is.

Wait a minute this isnt minor its really shit, I'm in the wrong thread WAH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 August, 2009, 06:10:44 PM
Oh, that's bad luck.

"Somebody had obviously put chemical waste or paint in the bin and when the bin lorry emptied it and crushed it it caused a chemical reaction.

"When I came down I saw fire engines, police, breathing apparatus and the bin lorry was smoking away."

Some people are so thoughtless!  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 18 August, 2009, 06:34:55 PM
Just been told I can go home so in the end it was minor* and in the correct thread. Huzzah!


Unless I go home and all my neighbours are now zombies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 August, 2009, 11:54:24 PM
Next doors car that is parked in one of the parking bays that is closest to my front door leaks oil which has accumulated into a patch of oil  that when exposed to strong sunlight stinks so when i sit on the front step it smells like a fuel dump.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 20 August, 2009, 03:15:33 PM
A four-section folding ladder slammed shut on my hand like a nutcracker, crushing it quite painfully. Good job it didn't shut on my fingers.
::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 August, 2009, 03:28:41 PM
Whilst walking down one of the pedestrianised parts of Mega City Maidstone with my family earlier, I noticed a car following us. It even got as close to a couple of feet at times. I didn't give a toss, but twice people came up to me and said that a car was behind me, to which I replied, "This is a pedestrian zone and if all the idiots in the town want to move out the way, more fool them!"
I even stopped once just to see how close it would get and then it dropped back a bit after that.
I only moved out the way when I came to an actual road ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 August, 2009, 03:49:38 PM
Is this the only post on this thread where the poster himself is the minor impediment?  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 August, 2009, 03:50:20 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 August, 2009, 03:28:41 PM
Whilst walking down one of the pedestrianised parts of Mega City Maidstone with my family earlier, I noticed a car following us. It even got as close to a couple of feet at times. I didn't give a toss, but twice people came up to me and said that a car was behind me, to which I replied, "This is a pedestrian zone and if all the idiots in the town want to move out the way, more fool them!"
I even stopped once just to see how close it would get and then it dropped back a bit after that.
I only moved out the way when I came to an actual road ;D

Good Stuff.

I would have done exactly the same.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 August, 2009, 05:52:05 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 18 August, 2009, 06:34:55 PM
Just been told I can go home so in the end it was minor* and in the correct thread. Huzzah!

Unless I go home and all my neighbours are now zombies.
Well, were they? If so, I'd say that definitely belongs on the Drokking Fantastic thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 20 August, 2009, 06:01:36 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 20 August, 2009, 05:52:05 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 18 August, 2009, 06:34:55 PM
Just been told I can go home so in the end it was minor* and in the correct thread. Huzzah!

Unless I go home and all my neighbours are now zombies.
Well, were they? If so, I'd say that definitely belongs on the Drokking Fantastic thread.

Its a bit like The Burbs were I live so I didnae notice. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 20 August, 2009, 07:09:18 PM
Ha! Good for you, CF. The other day I crossed a pedestrian crossing and a car that was stopped on red started proceeding over the crossing behind me before the green man had even started flashing. She was trying to drive through a red light. I could see the red signal from where I was standing. So I stopped crossing and stepped back into the car's path to force the driver to stop and I gesticulated and mouthed words at her. When she put her brakes on I carried on crossing again. She was apologetic but still quite confused.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 August, 2009, 07:34:41 PM


Some stroppy woman in the charity shop today called me an "obnoxious Cunt".I wont go into the details of why she said this but it was mainly to do with her attitude problem.

Anyway i called her a Hypocrite and that wasnt a comment that was just directed at her behaviour.

;D ;D

She left the shop immediately after i said it .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 21 August, 2009, 01:34:14 PM
I have been called many things in my life and indeed I have launched numerous epithets upon the deserving in return; but I have never been called, or called someone an "obnoxious Cunt". I can think of a few that it would suit - so thanks Peter!

You must have really got on her nerves for that!

On topic...while on fieldwork the other day,I was congratulating meself on my dry boots/gaiter combination just before I walked into a thigh deep river,invisible as it was covered in rank grasses. Wet feet for another 6 hours -  the water was squirting out the top of me boots into the gaiters!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 21 August, 2009, 01:54:14 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 21 August, 2009, 01:34:14 PM
On topic...while on fieldwork the other day,I was congratulating meself on my dry boots/gaiter combination just before I walked into a thigh deep river,invisible as it was covered in rank grasses. Wet feet for another 6 hours -  the water was squirting out the top of me boots into the gaiters!

I can relate to that. I once happened to be rowing out to this fort in Donegal through very rocky shallow waters.

(http://www.irishmegaliths.org.uk/zDoonFort.jpg)

Mere inches from the shore I thought it'd be a quick step into the shallows to anchor the boat.... I promptly disappeared up to my neck. Oh, how everyone else on board laughed... 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 21 August, 2009, 03:34:39 PM
Heh! The old lake shelf routine eh?

That fort looks amazing - whereabouts in D'gal is it?

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 21 August, 2009, 04:49:03 PM
That looks like somewhere Slaine would stay.... ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 21 August, 2009, 05:09:42 PM
He would indeed. Alas my namesake and ancestor, (not Fester obviously), met his end courtesy of an enemy smiting in this very place. It's near Ardara (on the coast about half way up).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 August, 2009, 07:45:54 PM
I cleared the church garden of another carrier bagful of litter today.

Filthy useless lazy trash just sit on the benches and eat their lunch and just drop their litter on the lawn even though there is a bin provided.They are given a green space to use for their own enjoyment yet they dont know how to treat it with respect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 24 August, 2009, 04:15:27 PM
I've been on the brink of going to the post office for the last hour and a half.
The only thing stopping me is the sudden and mysterious disappearance of approximately five or six rolls of sticky tape and a pack of envelopes, all of which are generally in the way and cluttering up every drawer I look in when I don't need them... >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 September, 2009, 08:44:41 PM
Jobsworth shop assistants.  ::)

In B&Q looking at expensive lampshades (I need one for the landing, okay? and then I never need buy a replacement, ever, because it'll never wear out or go out of fashion). I notice the only stock item in one of the designs I'm looking at is broken. Knowing what I know about B&Q's disastrous inventory system, I know that if it doesn't sell they won't get in a replacement, and if I decide on that lampshade they'll never have a not broken one for me to buy.

So I take the item to a member of staff. They can write off the lampshade as damaged goods and send it back and a replacement will be ordered. "You need to take it to a member of the decorating section. I only work on kitchens. I can't give you a price on that." I tell her I don't want to buy it, I just want it removed from stock so they'll get a good one in in case I want to buy one of the same design. She refuses to deal with it - not her department. "Okay" I say, "I could spend my time looking for a member of staff from decorating. There's no-one there, and you're the first person I found. Alternatively I could just go and put it back on the shelf." She agrees that yes, I could indeed do that. Fine.

I still had it in my trolley when I got to the checkout and explained the situation. The checkout lad confirmed that another shade in the same design would not be ordered until that one is sold, and that the most they can take off the price of the damaged one is 20%. That's not actually true, but I wasn't going to haggle because I didn't want the bloody thing!

So there you have it: B&Q staff put damaged goods back on the shelf and lose sales because the shop doesn't do customer orders (that's so 1980s!), they don't routinely reduce damaged items for sale and remove them from stock to get new, unbroken goods in, and staff are not expected to be concerned about the profitability of the business as a whole, just the little corner of it they work in.

Maybe I'll try a lighting shop on the Internet instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 September, 2009, 10:00:41 PM
B&Q's shelf-stacking policies are mind-blowing.  Not once, ever, has anyone there been able to tell me if they're getting more of any given item in, and Usher's experience rather explains why.  

Example:  I was buying a small mountain of paving slabs last year, but they didn't have quite enough of the style I was looking at.  Would they be getting more in, I asked.  No idea.  Well is it possible to order some more, because I won't buy any of them unless I can get enough.  No idea, they just get what comes in.  Ah well, 'bye then, I'll just go to a builders' supplier instead.  Probably best.  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 September, 2009, 11:11:17 PM
You know when you buy wallpaper, you want all the rolls to have come off the same batch so there's no difference in shade when you hang it? I reserved 20 rolls online, then went to the store to collect it. Customer reservations come from stock, they aren't ordered in specially. So they offered me 13 rolls from one batch, 4 from another, and 3 from a third batch. The next delivery would bring in however many rolls of yet another batch it took to make the stock number up to 30.

Needless to say, I wasn't paying £240 for a bunch of odds and sods.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 05 September, 2009, 11:39:02 PM
I rarley buy in the likes of B&Q or Woodies, most items are overpriced and as mentioned the staff generally (however helpful) dont know what they are talking about.
Better to to to locally owned merchants, most times they are cheaper,the staff know what they are selling, they generally have a wider and different range since its not centerally supplied.
B&Q annoyed me this year, I was in the market for a ride on mower, checked the B&Q site, they had a good mower for around £1100.00, I went into the store to see about getting it, they wanted €22000.00 for the same mower, no one could tell me why  the difference in price between here in Mayo and in Belfast. Ended up getting a secondhand one, one year old, only 15 hours work for €800.00.

David
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 September, 2009, 11:57:10 PM
I was cleaning my ear with a cotton bud and there was blood on the bud.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 06 September, 2009, 12:45:15 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 September, 2009, 11:57:10 PM
I was cleaning my ear with a cotton bud and there was blood on the bud.

that's cos your getting fucked in the (r)ear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 September, 2009, 03:16:31 AM
Is it wrong of me to point out that under no circumstances are you meant to use those cotton bud things to clean your ears?  

Her exact words were "never put anything sharper than your elbow in your ear"

I'm only saying it because an ex-girlfriend of mine was a medical student and she nearly lost her life one morning when she spotted me doing just that.  People have lost their hearing like that and it actually compacts the goo in there making regular syringing more and more necessary.  Drop a spot of olive oil in there regularly, it'll keep it soft and the corner of a flannel while in the shower should take care of any loose gunk.

I'd gone for a huge chunk of my life without knowing this, so I figure I ought to tell anyone I can.  Within reason obviously.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 September, 2009, 03:21:31 AM
Yep that's true, but you can't resist a good old poke in the ear with one of those cotton buds. What's life without a bit of danger now and then!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 September, 2009, 03:53:07 AM
True.

And nothing beats an ear-canal itch like the tip of your little finger.  Bliss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SamuelAWilkinson on 06 September, 2009, 04:00:32 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 September, 2009, 11:57:10 PM
I was cleaning my ear with a cotton bud and there was blood on the bud.

Possibly a sign of an ear infection, and definitely something you want to check out with your GP. It may be nothing, but take it from one who knows, it's not worth potentially losing an ear's worth of hearing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 06 September, 2009, 10:30:41 AM
And nothing beats an ear-canal itch like the tip of your little finger.  Bliss.


This is what the caps of 'Bic' biro's are for...

-Bouwel-
(Also, I share your B&Q pain. They have no idea of what the stock is, does or is suitable for)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 September, 2009, 11:14:37 AM
It is very ironic that in a recession hardly any retailers are able to get a proper hold on customer service, which can make all the difference between selling and not selling, instead employing staff who can't be bothered and are content to know nothing, or else salesmen, who aren't known for their commitment to customer service either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 06 September, 2009, 11:33:21 AM
To contrast with the B&Q standard of service I recently went to the jewelry quarter of Birmingham to pick up some previously ordered chemicals. As it turned out one of the boxes had been incorrectly labeled and didn't contain the item I wanted. These things happen of course but the service I recieved was amazing. The assistant telephoned another shop across the road to see if they had it. When they did they popped out and got it for me. While I was waiting I asked if they had any cut glass acid bottles (I needed three). When they looked they only had the one, but it was given to me for free as 'They'd already caused me enough trouble as it was'. Fantastic.

Also if you ever need any gold rings etc. that's the area to go to.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 September, 2009, 11:40:26 AM
QuoteBetter to to to locally owned merchants, most times they are cheaper,the staff know what they are selling, they generally have a wider and different range since its not centerally supplied.

All true, and I tend to use builder's providers whenever I can, and always for work, but for private use:

(a).  Generally not open at weekends or evenings.
(b).  Generally want to deliver at unspecified weekday times.

Makes it awkward for anything but large orders.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 September, 2009, 12:02:38 PM
I'm sure the advertising standards people could take action over that B&Q ad - you know the one - "I've been a builder for 20 years.....I used to run a landscape gardening business". Maybe these people all work in one utopian central branch, but every store in greater Manchester seems to be staffed by children, slackers and fuckwits.  And the healthiness of the plants in the garden bit is appalling.

And I don't think I could give up that so so satisfying cotton-bud scrape ... just gotta take care!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 September, 2009, 12:10:38 PM
There's a covert war of the cotton buds in my house. If I really, really feel the need I will give my ear canals a satisfying but careful poke, but it's best if the missus doesn't catch me doing it because then I get told off, and I can do without the grief.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 September, 2009, 09:19:14 PM
Planes, Trains and Automobiles is on. A fine film, no doubt, but I can't abide the synthtacular 80s soundtrack. I have the same problem with A Fish Called Wanda. It's also why Climate of Hunter by Scott Walker cannot seriously be considered a classic album in spite of the superior songwriting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 September, 2009, 09:24:01 PM
Last time I had nothing better to do than watch Educating Rita, I found it almost unwatchable thanks to the awful, awful, synthesizer soundtrack.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 September, 2009, 10:34:47 PM
I found Scarface almost unwatchable for the same reason.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 September, 2009, 10:46:37 PM
I had fish and [oven] chips for dinner but there were less baked beans than I usually like and I didn't want to open a new tin so I had to eat the chips first in order to preserve some of the juice because I like to mop it up with bread after the plate is clear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 September, 2009, 11:28:18 PM
So I settle down to watch an '80s movie I've never seen before.  It stars two of my top five favourite actors Bill Murray and John Candy, as well as Harold Ramis and lovely Sean Young, and it's directed by Ivan Reitman, of Ghostbusters fame.  Hell, there's even extensive gratuitous nudity.  Even the regrettable presence of Judge Reinhold shouldn't make this anything but a complete classic.

Unfortunately the film is Stripes and it's utterly and completely shite.  Even Bill Murray is terrible.  It's like a mash-up between Private Benjamin and Police Academy with all the jokes (and Goldie Hawn) taken out.  What a letdown!


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 06 September, 2009, 11:45:11 PM
Surely not. I laughed like a drain when I watched Stripes.

Mind you, I was about 12.  Not worth a rewatch then?


(I am on the right film yeah?   Mud wrestling John Candy and sexual banter with an ice cream scoop?)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 September, 2009, 12:00:07 AM
QuoteMud wrestling John Candy and sexual banter with an ice cream

I know, it should be great - John Candy in particular can make almost any movie work for me.  Maybe I just needed to see it for the first time when I was 12.  The copious lady gardens would certainly have impressed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 September, 2009, 06:02:53 PM
I got red paint in my head. It looks like a seagull had its period on me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 08 September, 2009, 08:12:13 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 06 September, 2009, 11:28:18 PM
So I settle down to watch an '80s movie I've never seen before.  It stars two of my top five favourite actors Bill Murray and John Candy, as well as Harold Ramis and lovely Sean Young, and it's directed by Ivan Reitman, of Ghostbusters fame.  Hell, there's even extensive gratuitous nudity.  Even the regrettable presence of Judge Reinhold shouldn't make this anything but a complete classic.

Unfortunately the film is Stripes and it's utterly and completely shite.  Even Bill Murray is terrible.  It's like a mash-up between Private Benjamin and Police Academy with all the jokes (and Goldie Hawn) taken out.  What a letdown!


Yep I rented this as its one of the few Bill Murray films I've not seen and I was so disappointed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 September, 2009, 01:14:38 AM
Turns out the video camera we ordered doesn't have a jack for an external mic - even though I assumed this was a standard feature on camcorders made since 1985 - so we'll have to send it back.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 09 September, 2009, 05:27:40 PM

Someone round here somewhere very close to where i live is cultivating Skunk.I have been at home most of the day with the window open and i keep smelling wafts of it when the breeze blows through the window.Also i have been outside twice and i noticed the smell outside by the church.Sometimes its smells very strong and other times it barely noticable.

There it is again now as i type.

Its a bit irritating as personally i dislike skunk and never smoke it as its like brain - rot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 September, 2009, 11:29:22 PM
Because my cat just vomitted on the top of the cooker.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 September, 2009, 12:05:18 AM
Quote from: PeterWolf on 09 September, 2009, 05:27:40 PM
Someone round here somewhere very close to where i live is cultivating Skunk.I have been at home most of the day with the window open and i keep smelling wafts of it when the breeze blows through the window.Also i have been outside twice and i noticed the smell outside by the church.Sometimes its smells very strong and other times it barely noticable.

Ugh. That stuff stinks. Vile. You know, I haven't had to smell that since I stopped taking the bus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 10 September, 2009, 09:25:10 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 September, 2009, 12:05:18 AM
since I stopped taking the bus.

Cue one hundred eyes peering at this thread and, in their paranoia, wonder what 'the bus' is, and where they can get some.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 September, 2009, 04:50:38 PM
The real problem with 'the bus' is that you can start using it really cheaply as a kid, and then as the years go by they just keep jacking up the price.  Next thing you know, you're paying €30 for an unending nightmare on 'coach'.  And then there's the return 'trip' to look forward to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 10 September, 2009, 04:54:56 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 September, 2009, 04:50:38 PM
The real problem with bus is that you can be using it really cheaply as a kid, and then as the years go by they just keep jacking up the price. 

I recently worked out that it's cheaper to buy a single from Canley to Coventry (3 minutes on the train) with PlusBus (a nation-wide scheme that allows you to use buses with your rail ticket for a small surcharge) using a Young Persons Railcard (£2.45) than it is to buy a Daysaver on the bus (£2.90).

Awesome.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 September, 2009, 05:06:27 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 September, 2009, 12:05:18 AM
Quote from: PeterWolf on 09 September, 2009, 05:27:40 PM
Someone round here somewhere very close to where i live is cultivating Skunk.I have been at home most of the day with the window open and i keep smelling wafts of it when the breeze blows through the window.Also i have been outside twice and i noticed the smell outside by the church.Sometimes its smells very strong and other times it barely noticable.

Ugh. That stuff stinks. Vile. You know, I haven't had to smell that since I stopped taking the bus.

I always smell it in the street as well and i am sick of the smell of it and i get sick and tired of the type of people who openly smoke it in the street.

I just hate the stuff .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 September, 2009, 06:34:37 PM
It's practically cheaper to get a return ticket from Cardiff to Newport than it is to get a return ticket from Cardiff to another part of Cardiff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 10 September, 2009, 07:25:09 PM
Quote from: PeterWolf on 10 September, 2009, 05:06:27 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 September, 2009, 12:05:18 AM
Ugh. That stuff stinks. Vile. You know, I haven't had to smell that since I stopped taking the bus.
I always smell it in the street as well and i am sick of the smell of it and i get sick and tired of the type of people who openly smoke it in the street.

I just hate the stuff .
With you 100%.  I really don't like the smell, but the audacity of scum using what we ought to remember are ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES IN THE STREET practically has me reaching for my Lawgiver mkIII and thumbing it to "incendiary".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 September, 2009, 01:48:53 PM
Seems like the debt [140 quid] that i allegedly owe Paypal has come back to haunt me again.

I got rid of the last bunch of debt collectors who were attempting to recover the debt by calling them out and asking them by letter to provide evidence that the debt was mine which they failed to do because i never heard another thing about it.I used various other tactics as well because their methods of collecting the debt were illegal and unlawful.

Today i got another final demand from another different bunch of cowboys who trade as a privatised debt recovery agency whose practices and methods are again illegal and unlawful and contravene trading standards and even contravene govt guidelines.

This is what happens when an industry is more or less unregulated.

A pain in the arse and a waste of my time so now i have to go through the whole process again and write another letter that warns them of my intentions that i am disputing the debt and is requesting to see evidence of how the debt was incurred and how i am liable and points out to them how they should do their job as if i have nothing better to do.

If they fail to do this then they can Fuck Off and i will deny them implied right of entry onto the property.

On the plus side should this matter ever go to court then i have all this evidence of their malpractice that will help my case and most probably win it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 September, 2009, 06:52:19 PM
Fucking car dealerships again!  >:(

The service centre where I left my car this morning advertises a closing time of 7.00pm. I have had to leave my car with them three times now for the same problem because they keep getting faulty components delivered and fitting them without checking them. This third go is the one time nobody has phoned me to say the job is finished. On every previous occasion they've phoned as soon as they were done with it for me to come and collect it. I phoned them after 6pm to find out what's happening, and a salesman tells me everyone in the servicing department has gone home, the servicing department is only open until 7pm as advertised on the website for receiving vehicles for repair, not for returning the keys of repaired vehicles to their owners. They've all fucking well gone home, and despite the business still being open for another 45 minutes for sales, there's no-one there who's allowed to give me my key back or look at the service paperwork, so my car has got to stay there until 9am tomorrow! I remember telling the guy on the counter twice that I needed the car back tonight because I have a job to drive to first thing tomorrow morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 September, 2009, 07:27:36 PM
There were a bunch of children hanging around the chip shop and the doors were open. I had half a mind to pick up one of their bikes and launch it at one of them. I think the kid in the Chelsea shirt was the ringleader but the kid with long hair looked like too much of a fucking douchebag for him to go unpunished.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 September, 2009, 07:50:16 PM
QuoteThere were a bunch of children hanging around the chip shop and the doors were open. I had half a mind to pick up one of their bikes and launch it at one of them. I think the kid in the Chelsea shirt was the ringleader but the kid with long hair looked like too much of a fucking douchebag for him to go unpunished.

Looks like Mary's offspring have spread beyond Ravensglade.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 September, 2009, 09:41:53 PM
When people leave their bikes lying IN THE DOORWAY of shops, I make a point of stepping with all my 13 stone on the wheel as I step over - oops!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 11 September, 2009, 09:50:42 PM
NICE.  Like that.  That's going on my habitually grumpy, world-improving behaviours that you can get away with by saying "whoops!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 September, 2009, 10:47:22 PM
Got in from work today and looking outside I noticed some scum nicking the lead flashing of a sloping roof on a house at the back of my garden. He didn't care at all that my wife was bringing in the washing.
I did the right thing and called the police, to their credit were round within five minutes, but by that time the git was gone.
Rather than being discreet they were straight round my house for a statement and were looking at said crime incident from my back yard whilst getting the information from me leaving all and sundry to see that it was us that did the right thing.
Still I hope that they get the bastard.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 September, 2009, 10:58:36 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 11 September, 2009, 09:50:42 PM
NICE.  Like that.  That's going on my habitually grumpy, world-improving behaviours that you can get away with by saying "whoops!"

Actually he said "oops".

Lost my day bus ticket today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 12 September, 2009, 11:02:40 PM
Yeah, the whole "be discreet" thing never seems to work with the cops.  

I once did a similar thing and they were blues and twos in the garden and knocking on the neighbours doors saying "Mr Gloady at 79 saw this crime, did you happen to see it?  Yes, MR GLOADY.  IN THE SHARED HOUSE WITH THE BLEACHED HAIR.  YES, THAT'S HIM OVER THERE *points*"

Not fun when you're 90% sure it was a kid you recognise from the other end of the road who did said crime and who you pass on your way to work/uni/your girlfriend's house/the gym/the pub you spend the next month waiting for a crowbar to slide down the back of your head taking your brain with it.  

Lesson here?  Don't call the cops, seemingly.  Can't bring myself to learn it though.  Scum need to learn how the world works [/Rorschach]

Good point Roger, apologies.  It's still on my list.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 September, 2009, 11:07:09 PM
I am quite ready for a rumble at the moment. I have a lot of pent up anger to be released and woe betide any little jumped up prick/s who try it on. I am only trying to defend my family and property guv.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 September, 2009, 11:12:30 PM
My foot hurts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 12 September, 2009, 11:54:30 PM
the tags or quotations ..or whatever they are on peoples posts ..are really annoying and difficult to distinguish from an actual post since the redesign..a minor annoyance

but worth a mention
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 September, 2009, 12:10:05 AM
Quote from: johnnystress on 12 September, 2009, 11:54:30 PM
but worth a mention

Very true. The quoting system itself is mildly retarded -- there are plenty of forums (fora?) that manage to eliminate the whole 'nested quote' thing and only quote the last person in the quoted post, and a couple of them only quote the text that's highlighted when you hit "quote".

The current system makes misattributing a quotation horribly easy -- I've had to make a couple of grovelling apologies on this very board for that very reason.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 September, 2009, 02:04:33 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 12 September, 2009, 11:02:40 PM
Yeah, the whole "be discreet" thing never seems to work with the cops.

Years ago I called the police on a couple who were fighting on my garden wall at 2am. I monitored the situation from inside until the police arrived, rather than tackle scary people with just my pants on. When the police arrived their radio was so loud it woke my partner up, and I heard my name broadcast over it within earshot of the perp.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 September, 2009, 02:43:39 PM
I went into town to go to the food and drink festival which is a load of foodstalls in the street selling all kinds of different things that you can eat.There was some amazing stuff but FFS it was so crowded that i had to give up and leave as i cant stand crowds like that as it was claustrophobic.Shame as i never made it to the burger stall that was selling ground steak burgers.The smell of that was beautiful.

There was also what looked like an invasion of motorcyclists on the seafront as there looked to be about 10 million of them.Trying to get through them on a bike was a nightmare.

Quote from: vzzbux on 12 September, 2009, 10:47:22 PM
Got in from work today and looking outside I noticed some scum nicking the lead flashing of a sloping roof on a house at the back of my garden. He didn't care at all that my wife was bringing in the washing.
I did the right thing and called the police, to their credit were round within five minutes, but by that time the git was gone.
Rather than being discreet they were straight round my house for a statement and were looking at said crime incident from my back yard whilst getting the information from me leaving all and sundry to see that it was us that did the right thing.
Still I hope that they get the bastard.






V

I didnt think that there was very much scrap value in lead anymore unless demand for it from china has pushed prices up.

If the police do catch the lead thief you are talking about then the homeowner should make the little fucker pay for redoing the flashings.I would have gone over there myself if i caught someone doing that as after all what goes up has to come down again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 September, 2009, 04:17:55 PM
Last year I worked out with BT that I needed to pay £7 per fortnight to cover all my telephonic costs. Which I did. Every fortnight, on the dot. Today I got a bill from BT for near fifty quid. Upon contacting my local BT representative, a thick-accented Indian gentleman with a sock in his mouth who seemed to be connected to the exchange by way of a tin can and a length of hairy string, it transpired that me offering to pay £10 per fortnight simply wasn't good enough. Bastiches.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 September, 2009, 05:54:54 PM
Forgot to mention that on Saturday I FOUND A BATH TOWEL IN THE TOILET.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 September, 2009, 06:00:41 PM
Oh dear.

Roger, that's awful.  You have my sympathies.  Ug!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 September, 2009, 06:50:51 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 September, 2009, 05:54:54 PM
Forgot to mention that on Saturday I FOUND A BATH TOWEL IN THE TOILET.

As minor impediments go, that's pretty minor!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 14 September, 2009, 07:46:36 PM
I still have no Prog and I've got a feeling it's because they've fixed the door entry system on the close.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 September, 2009, 11:35:02 PM
Is it really necessary for the police helicopter to hover low over my house shaking my windows and blaring its strobe lights through my blinds every night?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 16 September, 2009, 11:35:46 PM
Depends what you're up to, I suppose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 16 September, 2009, 11:36:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 16 September, 2009, 11:35:02 PM
Is it really necessary for the police helicopter to hover low over my house shaking my windows and blaring its strobe lights through my blinds every night?

Should I not have rung the Police and fingered ye as a Fenian Bastard? Oops! My bad.

Sorry!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 September, 2009, 11:42:33 PM
Right about now I'd settle for the Owlship or PSU Spy-in-the-Sky cameras, hell even Blue Thunder perving on my naked yoga sessions, just something that doesn't wake the kids and freak out the dog!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 17 September, 2009, 12:24:00 AM
I used to say the same..until they got enough evidence and then, well it was a fair cop

housemate.not me :-\
I used to say the same..until they got enough evidence and then, well it was a fair cop

housemate.not me Undecided

also I now live beside a small airport, and now, the dog that put up with police raids, drunk punks, off their tits ravers, drunk scumbags..has now developed an issue with helicopters

bah

it's hard to live on the leafy 'burbs
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 17 September, 2009, 12:27:28 AM
double post..

EDIT

ah here

tech people please sort out this forum-thanks
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 September, 2009, 04:36:12 PM
For the last few weeks we've been working on a DVD for our biggest client. The company who were lined up to make the DVD itself (and who we usually use for stuff like this) have been brilliant - providing quotes and help along the way.

We came to place the order this morning, only to be told that due to 'unforseen circumstances' they could not meet our deadline. To be fair, this wasn't their fault and I was glad they were honest enough to tell me.

So, I hit Google and found somewhere else. Via email, they offered a great price but said they needed our master disc tomorrow (Fri) in order to hit our deadline. They also asked for a cheque for the full amount (several hundred pounds) which was to be made out to a different company name. No problem.

So, I went to the Post Office and asked for Special Delivery in order to send the DVD and cheque. However, the Post Office could not find the address of this company in their database. So I called them on my cell.

The landline wouldn't connect. I eventually got through to a mobile where a chap (who I'm sure was driving) reassured me that they could be found at the address they'd given me. So, I wasn't to worry - just send it...

The (wonderful) Post Office clerk though insisted the address didn't exist, and if I still wanted to send the disc, it would have to be via regular mail. She also inferred, but couldn't say officially, that she would advise against sending anything to a company who didn't exist on their system.

It was only then that the alarm bells started to ring, so I walked away without sending the disc and ripped up our cheque.

Now I don't know if this company is legit or not, but it's a lot of faith to put in an organisation whose address doesn't check out via what is I assume is the most authoritative source on the planet. I now need to look elsewhere of course.

Did I do the right thing? Or have I risked missing our deadline because I wouldn't trust the little guy whose company is being unfairly punished by a dodgy database?

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 17 September, 2009, 04:39:57 PM
From what you said it sounds entirely liek the right and wise thing to do!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 September, 2009, 04:51:13 PM
QuoteFrom what you said it sounds entirely liek the right and wise thing to do!

Yup.  Been stung this way before ourselves - hired (we thought) by a respectable mid-sized company, did the job but couldn't get paid and they stopped answering the phone, so I wrote a formally snotty letter to the registered MD who was on the phone 5 minutes after getting it.  No connection whatsoever with our 'clients', who just happened to be using an identical business name for an ostensibly identical business.  Still pursuing the €13K that cost us more than a year later.

Nowadays I check new clients/suppliers out in the Companies Office - don't know how it works in the Ooo-Kay, but they should have an online service, with instant access to registered address, directors and accounts summaries for a few quid.  At the very least you can check that the business addresses agree, and that they are registering annual accounts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 September, 2009, 05:03:06 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 September, 2009, 04:51:13 PM
QuoteFrom what you said it sounds entirely liek the right and wise thing to do!

Yup.  Been stung this way before ourselves - hired (we thought) by a respectable mid-sized company, did the job but couldn't get paid and they stopped answering the phone, so I wrote a formally snotty letter to the registered MD who was on the phone 5 minutes after getting it.  No connection whatsoever with our 'clients', who just happened to be using an identical business name for an ostensibly identical business.  Still pursuing the €13K that cost us more than a year later.

Nowadays I check new clients/suppliers out in the Companies Office - don't know how it works in the Ooo-Kay, but they should have an online service, with instant access to registered address, directors and accounts summaries for a few quid.  At the very least you can check that the business addresses agree, and that they are registering annual accounts.

Try Dun and Bradstreet:


http://209.85.229.132/search?q=cache:SR_a7hSXvkAJ:www.dnb.co.uk/+dunn+and+bradstreet&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk&client=firefox-a

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 17 September, 2009, 05:15:32 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 September, 2009, 04:51:13 PM
Nowadays I check new clients/suppliers out in the Companies Office - don't know how it works in the Ooo-Kay, but they should have an online service, with instant access to registered address, directors and accounts summaries for a few quid.  At the very least you can check that the business addresses agree, and that they are registering annual accounts.
Companies House is what you want.

Search Here (http://wck2.companieshouse.gov.uk/4045f27071dd189474f7b9fdaf2ab36c/wcframe?name=accessCompanyInfo)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 September, 2009, 06:13:42 PM
Cheers fellas - will get it sorted in the end (I hope)...

:-)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 September, 2009, 06:40:33 PM
For some reason Mrs Tips decided we needed a set of Chef's knives. (Never mind the fact that are geared to slicing meat and we are (mostly) vegetarian.)

So she decided to buy them off a bloke who was selling them out the back of a van at her work the other day.  Quite a few people in her work place also purchased them. 9 pieces - in a case - £30. 

"You're all doing us a big favour as we are just going into liquidation so we need to shift as much of this really high quality stock as possible for a knock down price." was his patter.

As soon as I looked at I though "Uh Oh". That looks like the Victorinox logo tacked onto a company named "Swiss Tech" pretending to be a quality product.

One internet search later and we can't turn up "Swiss Tech" (as expected but "Swiss-Tech" do make a very nice multi-tool apparently).

So it looks like she's paid £30 for some fake make knives.  Now the quality may not actually be that bad (after all, a lot of what you pay for is NAME and REPUTATION). But they do feel a little light and ting a bit when you bash them on the work surface.

She's so much more brilliant (and attractive and sexy) than me in absolutely every aspect of life that I'm amazed any sense of logic appears to have deserted her on this occassion.

Still £30 for knives may not be too bad - as long as they don't go blunt too quickly.


(I once applied for a job in Music Marketing that turned out to be flogging dodgy speakers from teh back of a van in and around central scotland.  I warned the target punters off every sale as soon as I was alone with them and reported the company to the police but nothing ever seemed to be done about it).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 17 September, 2009, 07:06:38 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 17 September, 2009, 06:40:33 PM
I once applied for a job in Music Marketing that turned out to be flogging dodgy speakers from teh back of a van in and around central scotland.  I warned the target punters off every sale as soon as I was alone with them and reported the company to the police but nothing ever seemed to be done about it.

Christ I knew someone when I was a student in Sheffield who got sucked into this exact con! Either its a classic or these fella's were well travelled?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 September, 2009, 07:16:27 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 17 September, 2009, 06:40:33 PMSo she decided to buy them off a bloke who was selling them out the back of a van at her work the other day.  Quite a few people in her work place also purchased them. 9 pieces - in a case - £30.  

I once bought a set of screwdrivers off one of those young guys with big holdalls and shiny suits in a pub, dozens of them in a plastic case with a handle, all for about three quid or so. The first time I tried to unscrew something I ended up with a yellow handled corkscrew. I swear they must have been made of aluminium.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 September, 2009, 12:38:22 AM
This thread's getting too depressing. The bendy screwdrivers were funny though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 September, 2009, 12:53:29 AM
I remember the speakers that were being sold on the street out of the back of white vans.I cant remember the name of the make of them exactly but they were sold as "studio monitors" which made them sound like top end equipment and expensive but they were sold cheap.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 18 September, 2009, 09:13:49 AM
I always have a great laugh when these traveling "salesmen" turn up on the business estate where I work. There's nothing like haggling an Irish gentleman (and I'm sorry, but virtually all of the guys we get doing this are Irish, bar the Italian guy who can't go home with his boot still full of leather jackets or his boss will feed him to the fishes) down from £300 for his brand new petrol mower, which he'll have to pay VAT on if he takes it back to Ireland, sob, and in the shops would cost you a grand, to £60! And then realising you've left your wallet at home. Doh.

We get them all, lawnmowers, power tools, cutlery, carpets, clothing, stereos, you name it. The best one so far is the guy who was selling mini quad bikes. We feigned interest and got him to start one up. He eventually managed this with some fantastic swearing and then shot off round the yard only to discover, no brakes! Oh no, calamity, he was so busy looking at the bars, trying to work out why he couldn't stop that he clipped the back of his own van and flipped the quad bike. After checking he wasn't seriously injured (and we were fairly sure he wasn't due to the amount of continued swearing) we all wandered off laughing heartily.

Always good sport.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 18 September, 2009, 11:59:51 AM
Stories of dodgy salesmen always remind me of this incident.

Years ago when I was working in a pub in Cardiff, we had a temporary manager forced upon us (the previous manager having been discovered conkers deep in a barmaid and thrown out by his wife, thus invalidating their contract with the brewery).

This temporary manager used to allow one of his mates to come into the pub to flog suitcases full of dodgy watches, videos, perfumes and such.

One night, the manager bought one of these £5 "Lorex" watches and spent the rest of the evening singing its praises to anyone that would listen. "Just like the real thing. You can't tell them apart. Only a fiver. Bargain...". That sort of thing.

Next night, I came in to do my shift to find said manager reassembling the watch in the lounge whilst cursing out his mate under his breath.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 18 September, 2009, 12:16:53 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 18 September, 2009, 11:59:51 AM
having been discovered conkers deep in a barmaid

Expressive use of language is one of my favourite things in life :)
Title: Re: Impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 September, 2009, 12:40:00 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 18 September, 2009, 12:38:22 AMThis thread's getting too depressing. The bendy screwdrivers were funny though.
i liked them too. Dreadfully amusing. Because some insufferable invertebrate from a happy clappy church is visiting in the room next to my mum's in the hospice. He's got an acoustic 12 string guitar and he's here talking about, and i quote "my friend - and yours *wink* Our Lord Jesus Christ *winning, pension book siphoning smile, applause, choirs of angels*". He ahemed outside my mum's open door. She shot him a look that'd curdle milk. He ran. At least the Catholics have the decency to be po faced, mysterious and dour about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 18 September, 2009, 02:24:36 PM
I was slightly perturbed to be handed a note about a church service - basically a recruiting thing - at Rose's nursery today. It's a local school, and she's been going for barely a month. It just seemed... wrong. I know it's the community and everything, but I don't think they should be recruiting people at a council-run school.

Why is this a minor impediment? I found it a slight inconvenience to have to put the note in the bin.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 September, 2009, 07:28:46 PM
That's vile, Trout. 

Of course I'm of the opinion that things like faith schools are the worst kind of insidious brain-washing of formative psyches so I probably WOULD agree with you there. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 18 September, 2009, 11:27:15 PM
Being invited to a church service is vile?

I'm not big on the church- but it's hardly the crime of the century is it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 18 September, 2009, 11:30:52 PM
Quote from: Matt Timson on 18 September, 2009, 11:27:15 PM
Being invited to a church service is vile?

I'm not big on the church- but it's hardly the crime of the century is it?

Well my adopted son Damien kicks up a right fuss whenever I try and take him :)

Oh and I hurt my thumb slightly today while moving furniture.BAH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 19 September, 2009, 01:55:17 AM
Yeah, I think "vile" is going too far. It's only a minor impediment and a slight sense of unease.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 September, 2009, 04:18:14 PM
They say religion is like a big dog - if it's yours, it gives comfort and security; if it's someone else's it can be scary; and in either event it should be kept away from small children.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 19 September, 2009, 04:22:56 PM
I'm yet to have religion crap on the floor or hump my leg, but I see where you're going with the analogy.

Not a vast fan of religion myself.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 September, 2009, 06:39:25 PM
I like this analogy.  I like the bit where it gives me permission to castrate religion so it doesn't go around being aggressive and making little religions.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 September, 2009, 07:04:31 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 19 September, 2009, 04:18:14 PM
They say religion is like a big dog - if it's yours, it gives comfort and security; if it's someone else's it can be scary; and in either event it should be kept away from small children.
A friend of mine says religion is a bit like a big winkle - fun to have but you'll get in trouble if you ram it down people's throats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 20 September, 2009, 08:09:28 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 19 September, 2009, 07:04:31 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 19 September, 2009, 04:18:14 PM
They say religion is like a big dog - if it's yours, it gives comfort and security; if it's someone else's it can be scary; and in either event it should be kept away from small children.
A friend of mine says religion is a bit like a big winkle - fun to have but you'll get in trouble if you ram it down people's throats.
Or force it on children until they are old enough to make their own minds up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 September, 2009, 12:31:38 PM
On the subject of sky-god cults, I'm being made to feel like a bad parent because I absolutely refuse to get my kids baptised.

Now I could understand this if my family and friends were religious types, but with a few exceptions they really aren't (my mother, my chief persecutor, will only enter a church at gunpoint).  Instead the reasoning is that I'm restricting their choice of school, at a time when our education system is one drafty prefab away from implosion.  

A number of our friends and acquaintances with no religious convictions whatsoever have recently had their kids baptised specifically to get into a school.  Their reasoning:  'it's no big deal'.  One rather reasonable friend said:  "it'll give them something to rebel against".  

I just can't see myself standing in church proclaiming a faith I've long since lost, telling porky pies in front of my family and friends, to enter a child into this religion that would put up with such obvious cynicism on my part, all to get said child into the kind of school that would make such a grotesque process  a precondition.   And what are people to make of my marraige vows, if just a short while later I'm prepared to tell a heap of lies in not dissimilar circumstances?

My problem here is this:  am I being stupidly thickheaded about this, and putting my own beliefs (atheism) ahead of my kids' welfare, just like every nutter who won't let their children have transfusions?  I'm happy enough for my kids to find their own crackpot beliefs, but I just don't want to start them out under what I regard as a shadow of willful ignorance and hypocrisy.

By the way, I personally like churches and ceremonies, the art, architecture, music, history and atmosphere, a lot of Christians I know are the finest most generous folk, and I've seen first hand the good parish-based communities can do.  I just don't believe, and don't hold with indoctrination.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 September, 2009, 02:08:36 PM
I think that the indoctrination and politicising of children in schools is Vile.

This is going on a lot in schools in the US particularly but the schools dont teach the kids anything about the US constitution to the extent that only 28 percent even know what it is or anything about it.

This is just as harmful as indoctrination with religion in schools but in some ways is worse because it is without question a form of exploitation and morally reprehensible.

Children dont vote or pay taxes.

My school had prayers and sometimes hymns everyday in morning assembly and RE plus the odd outing to a church service and that type of thing.It didnt do any harm because i mostly ignored it and didnt say the prayers or sing the hymns either and even though it was C of E it wasnt a prerequisite to be baptised to be admitted into it.

As for others beliefs i make a point of not disrespecting their beliefs whatever that might be but i will say that i havent got very much time or patience for certain sections of the Atheist community and anyone knows anything about political history will know that Atheist political systems have led humanity to some very dark places and were/are just as evil as religious extremists.

I detest Satanism and Luciferianism and New Age BS which is perdominantly Luciferian based and i detest Gurus especially all that UN one world religion and all that Maitreya / Nesara/Share International BS.This is endorsed by the UN who promulgate it.

I also believe in religious freedom and i find it unacceptable that in this country and in the US Christians are being persecuted or having their freedom to express their religious beliefs curtailed.Unnacceptable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 20 September, 2009, 11:22:22 PM
Tordelback: I went through similar with both my kids- and likewise had friends who, despite years of professed atheism, ran to church to get theirs signed up into the god club (sadly, no furry jesus badge with moving eyes was given to them afterwards). Both of mine remain unbaptised. Furthermore, I have pulled both of mine out of any kind of religious education- including "comparitive religion", on the grounds that it's all malevolent bollocks and comparing one against the other seems to me roughly the biggest waste of time it's possible for a child to spend. They're children fer fuckssakes! They believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy! They have very little ability to distinguish between fantasy and reality as it is- and these people want to further screw with their minds!

Mine got into the local school because we live two minutes down the road- which I realise is of no help if you don't similarly live near to yours. The school had a "fairly bad" reputation, but have benefitted from a phenomenal headteacher over the past few years, who has turned it around somewhat. I've found that the best way to get the most from the school is to get involved. I speak to the teachers and head on a regular basis and if I see standards slipping, I raise bloody hell until I get something done about it. LIke all schools it has problems, but it's getting there and both of my kids are doing well.

No matter what the school is, if you delve deep enough you'll see the problems that really matter (like late-reading and writing) are more to do with the National Curriculum and teaching methods, than the culture at the school itself. Phonics has a lot to answer for.

Good luck, anyway- and don't compromise!

SBT

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 September, 2009, 12:03:20 AM
Phonics? How so? I've heard good things about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 21 September, 2009, 12:18:57 AM
While I have no kids of my own I'm becoming increasingly involved in my nephews life (my no fixed abode status leads me to spend a lot of time at my sisters home) and I have to say that I worry about his education a lot. Last year we had the problem of the teacher inventing her own way of writing letters so he didn't recognise them when he saw them written properly. Despite this he became an avid and enthusiastic reader. One hurdle overcome.

We are now 2 weeks into a new school year with a new teacher. She, despite being rather attractive in a middle aged milfy sort of way, is not exactly filling us with optimism.
On the first day at school he came home with a book 2 levels below what he had been reading last term. The next day his mum took him to school and asked about it, to be told that the class all had to start at the same level. Apparently she was qute snotty about it and insinuated that there was no way a child of his age would be at the level my sister was claiming. Why she couldn't just ask his old teacher I don't know. Anyway, my sister persevered and got his level raised so he brought home a more difficult book that evening.

He then proceeded to bring the same book every night for a week. Cue this wednesday. I'm picking him up and decide to check his bag. Sure enough, its the same book, so I call over his teacher. She apologises and explains that he hadn't asked for a new book. Now correct me if I'm being dumb but surely its up to teacheres to assign books, not wait for kids to ask for them, especially since the kids are all required to return a signed diary every day to say the've read and my sister has specifically noted in this diary that he needs a new book.

I finally get her to agree that he will definitely need a new one the next day. He still has the same one.

I may be being paranoid or cynical or both but in light of her comments at the start of all this I'm inclined to think that she is purposely holding him back until the others catch up. Which to my mind is all kinds of wrong. I've been to the library and picked up some books myself for him to practise on but I shudder to think how things are gonna progress in this school.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 September, 2009, 12:33:40 AM
Quote from: King Trout on 21 September, 2009, 12:03:20 AM
Phonics? How so? I've heard good things about it.

So had I- until my eldest, who knew his alphabet at 2 1/2 and could read fluently by the time he left Nursery, forgot the names of all the letters and could only refer to them as "ah", "ber", "ker", "der", "eh", "fer", "ger", etc, by halfway through Reception Year. He's six now, and in year two, and they still aren't teaching the children to read properly. If I hadn't basically dumped a small comic shop and library into his bedroom a few years ago, I doubt he'd even be past the Usbourne Reading Tree level one by now. I know very few of the others in his class are. He goes to the school's main library to pick his books, while the others get to choose from the selection of Julia Donaldson/ Alex Scheffler knock-offs that the classroom holds.

Amusingly, this sometimes causes trouble, as he often likes to read Goosebumps and other such books "not for his age". Cue earnest teacher telling me sheepishly that he "has chosen a book that you'll probably not want him to read"...

Basically, I could read perfectly well by the time I was five. I learned to read through comics and the Radio Times, and my school supported and expanded my reading. As a result, when I was six and a half (and 2000AD came along) I was more than capable of understanding most of it. So can my eldest- but the other children, who are reliant on Phonics, struggle to read the big words in 'Spidey and friends'.

Sadly, I feel this means that by the time they are fluent enough to read comics, the only titles on the market available to them will be either the ones that have a content several years below them, like 'In The Night Garden', or ones (like the prog) that are now a decade or so ahead. result- they don't read anything, because nothing interests them.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 September, 2009, 12:41:23 AM
Quote from: faplad on 21 September, 2009, 12:18:57 AM
He then proceeded to bring the same book every night for a week. Cue this wednesday. I'm picking him up and decide to check his bag. Sure enough, its the same book, so I call over his teacher. She apologises and explains that he hadn't asked for a new book. Now correct me if I'm being dumb but surely its up to teacheres to assign books, not wait for kids to ask for them, especially since the kids are all required to return a signed diary every day to say the've read and my sister has specifically noted in this diary that he needs a new book.

And exactly the same happened to us. Exactly. And it resulted in me, after weeks of this, offering to give the school 500 or so books, if the problem was that they didn't have any. This went down well, as you can imagine- and I eventually had it out with the head. The situation was resolved, for a while, and he came home with a different book when he needed one.

However, now we have started a new year- and the problem has returned. I'm giving it another week, then making an appointment to see the head again. The thing is, to just... keep... pushing. Make them totally aware you are completely involved in the child's education and keep an active eye on his development. Whether because they are genuinely thrilled that someone is doing so, or because they are scared at being caught out, teachers seem to react to this quite positively.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 21 September, 2009, 12:55:40 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 21 September, 2009, 12:41:23 AM
The thing is, to just... keep... pushing. Make them totally aware you are completely involved in the child's education and keep an active eye on his development. Whether because they are genuinely thrilled that someone is doing so, or because they are scared at being caught out, teachers seem to react to this quite positively.

SBT

This is the plan. However, since my sister is taking the opportunity afforded by my jobless prescence to get a lot of overtime in I am the one encountering the teachers more often than not and as an Uncle I don't carry as much weight. She will of course give up shifts to get this sorted - I'm in no way impplying she's neglectiing his schooling - but it seems a shame that she has to lose earnings to sort something that I would have thought would be a simple thing.

And yes, phonics are a bloody nightmare. The thing is, ask him to say the alphabet and its A B C. But if you're teaching him the spelling of words and say ABC he doesn't understand. You have to tell him it in ah, ber, ker. If he already knows the alphabet, surely this gibberish is a step backwards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 21 September, 2009, 12:58:28 AM
I'm finding all of this fascinating. It confirms a lot of what I suspected already. Sorry to hear about the pressure that's being put on non-religious parents to get their kids into religious schools. It shows what a shambles state education is in that that kind of hypocrisy is now apparently considered normal. The fads in teaching children to read make me quite angry. They need both the names and the sounds of letters to do it properly. One of my nephews still didn't know the names of letters of the alphabet after starting secondary school. The theory behind phonics is sound enough - it's better than teaching whole word recognition, which gives kids no clue when they encounter a new word for the first time - but some teachers are incapable of applying theory except in the most basic by-the-numbers way. They're now so used to being told what to do by politicians and education advisors they just don't know how to think for themselves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 21 September, 2009, 01:10:46 AM
Away from my nephew, I'd be interested what people thought of my brothers situation a couple of years ago.  He was a problem kid, dabbled in drugs and alchohol and with the best will in the world he wasn't the brightest kid in the world to start with. He spent very little time at school and when he was there he was usually in trouble.

Come the time of his GCSE exams none of us held out much hope of him even sitting. He by this time had been sent to a seperate school for "problem children" and the curriculum wasn't exactly academically minded if you know what I mean. He was reading at a the level of a 6/7 year old and could barely count past 10 without taking his shoes off. (This is not a cruel joke on my part, but hard fact. It was a constant worry for me, if not my mother)

He sat the exams, with someone stood next to him to read the questions. I was, quite literaly flabbergasted. How can this kind of thing help anyone involved. How do they think he's gonna be able to do a GCSE exam, in any subject, if he can't even read the questions? The school said that they were oblligated to give him every opportunity any other person of his age would get. The whole thing stank of statistics and quotas to me.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 21 September, 2009, 11:01:39 AM
I'd always suspected phonics was a bucket of old drivel, the experience of my nieces has only proved it. 

This crap isn't new though, my mum had taught me to read and my alphabet LONG before school started.  The teachers had a go at her because I was making the other children feel bad (making her life more difficult by forcing her to provide education tailored to kids who weren't just plopped in front of playschool all bloody day more like).  My mum naturally had a go right back and pointed out that the teacher's laziness shouldn't be her child's problem. 

As it turned out, it was.  I was promptly ignored for weeks. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 21 September, 2009, 11:23:47 AM
on the baptism thing, Im agnostic (ex Catholic, then ex-athiest go figure) and dont have any kidy winks myself but isn;t it better to be safe than sorry i mean i was taught as a child that un baptised people no matter how good they are dont have any chance of getting into that exclusive cluvb they call heaven.  Part of my reason for calling bullshit on the whole thing was when i asked about still births (my eldest sister had just lost her first child I was about 12) I never got an answer it was all breushed away effectivly leaving a very traumatised 12 year old thinking his first nephew was going to hell.  Screw them

CU RAdbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 September, 2009, 11:39:28 AM
Quote
QuotePart of my reason for calling bullshit on the whole thing was when i asked about still births (my eldest sister had just lost her first child I was about 12) I never got an answer it was all breushed away effectivly leaving a very traumatised 12 year old thinking his first nephew was going to hell.

While I know it's not official Catholic theology, and in fact Vatican 2, JP2 and Ratzinger/Benedict have all had a go at knocking (though not dismissing) the idea, it was common enough in Ireland to be taught that all unbaptised children went to Limbo rather than Heaven.  Forever.  This was coupled with the practice of excluding the unbaptised from consecrated burial, meaning generations of infants were buried in boundary ditches, and in old ringforts and barrows (perceived as liminal or sacred places, even if that sacral dimension was pagan in nature).  The most awful part of my job as an archaeologist over the years has been digging up these neonates and babies (not intentionally excavating them, but they are everywhere an archaeologist might care to work).  I can't ever get out of my mind the misery that the religious inflicted on their bereaved parents, the cruel idea that they would never be reunited with their children even in the eternity they anticipated after death, coupled with the idea of digging a lonely shallow grave in a ditch or mound, without comfort of priest or community.  It's a foulness that plays no small part in my dislike of religious teaching.  I'm also fairly sure that the Jesus of the gospels would kick the ass of whoever came up with that one.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 21 September, 2009, 11:48:27 AM
I have a head cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 September, 2009, 01:39:12 PM
Thanks for the thoughts on phonics, all. Rose is only in the crazily-named "ante-pre-school" year but I'll remember, and keep an eye on things.

We're lucky to live where we do, with lots of great little village schools nearby. But it can't hurt to get involved.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 21 September, 2009, 02:54:40 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 21 September, 2009, 11:01:39 AM
I'd always suspected phonics was a bucket of old drivel, the experience of my nieces has only proved it. 

This crap isn't new though, my mum had taught me to read and my alphabet LONG before school started.  The teachers had a go at her because I was making the other children feel bad (making her life more difficult by forcing her to provide education tailored to kids who weren't just plopped in front of playschool all bloody day more like).  My mum naturally had a go right back and pointed out that the teacher's laziness shouldn't be her child's problem. 

As it turned out, it was.  I was promptly ignored for weeks. 

Ha, I had the exact same problem when I started school Except for the mothers involvment. I taught myself to read from cat/mat type books and watching sesame street and the like. ZEE instead of ZED caught me out a few times but otherwise...
and when I started school I was in all sorts of trouble for daring to actually be able to read before I was supposed to. Got no support from my mother though who was always, when she showed an interest at all, very dismissive of anything learning related.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 21 September, 2009, 04:47:16 PM
That stinks, Fappers.  Truly. 

I wanted to smash in the rear windows of cars in the school car-park for years after that.  The smug window stickers that read "If you can read this - THANK A TEACHER" really piddled me off.  I'll thank a barmaid and a builder's foreman thanks.  They did more for me than any primary teacher.

Not hard to imagine kids failed by education in a more profound way turning "bad" and rebelling.  I learnt to hate school pretty early and pretty easily.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 21 September, 2009, 05:05:32 PM
I had all the trendy early 1970's ideas about learning. As seems to be the case with many on here I taught myself to read (one of my early memories is my mother letting me read a comic and then some books during the early 70's power cuts. She held the torch for me for what must have been ages until the battery died).

In secondary school I was bit more lucky. The books we read for the final two years were interesting to me (Romeo and Juliet, Brave New World). It was frustrating to work through Brave New World at a snails pace as I'd already read it in one weekend. We also got to see some rather good local productions of Romeo and Juliet as well as the Zaffrelli film (nudity, in school time no less!).

I would like to thank two of my teachers though; Mr. Whitley and Mr. Thomas. Two teachers of the very old school who taught me a great deal. The newly passed trendy teachers that taught me can all burn in the afterlife of their choice.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 21 September, 2009, 05:18:51 PM
Good work Bouwel, I concur.  The GOOD teachers I had were gold, more than making up for the more numerous BAD ones who were made of a substance far stickier and darker than gold.

Thanks Mr Mantio (for diagnosing the dyslexia) and Mr O'Brien for the support.  Oh, and Mr Francis from Middle School who got me interested in stuff under the mud before Indy had a chance to make that game look exciting (and Ms. Croft had a chance to make it look naughty).

Good teachers.  Hats off to 'em I say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 September, 2009, 06:20:20 PM
QuoteI taught myself to read from cat/mat type books and watching sesame street and the like... and when I started school I was in all sorts of trouble for daring to actually be able to read before I was supposed to.

Very similar to my own experience, especially Sesame Street and that difficult 'zee', although I'd have to credit my parents too.  Anyway, I was reading (if not writing) fluently when I got to school, and was promptly bored shitless.  However, my situation took a turn for the worse when far from being insensitive, my rather liberal primary school decided on this basis to bump me up from the first Junior Infants class to Senior Infants after Christmas of my first year.  Naturally my parents agreed, no doubt all a-glow with pride.  I lost all my nascent friends overnight (although bizarrely two lads I met that first year are still two of my closest friends, whereas I don't have one single friend, or even acquaintance, from my 'second' class), and went from being a bored smartypants to the smallest most backward guy in the class overnight.   I was all of 4 years old in a class of 5 and 6 year olds.  It was crap, and folks do not do it to your own kids.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 21 September, 2009, 09:15:29 PM
Wow. Fascination abounds. Roman Catholic burial customs, bad schooling and Godpleton's head cold. Lots of stuff to mull over and absorb there.

I'm glad to say there was nothing discernably trendy about my schooling, which started in 1975. "Nip - the - dog - plays - with - the - ball. See - Nip - run." I went to school totally unable to read, but excitedly envious of my brother bringing books home from school. I wanted to be able to read the words in them too. I just about remember learning to read, and being able to express ideas orally far more lucidly than I could write them when I was 6. By the time I was 7 my writing was as good as my speaking, except that when I spoke my spelling was better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 21 September, 2009, 10:40:36 PM
As a consequence of staying up until 5 am to finish an essay I spent most of my day off sleeping.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2009, 01:31:20 AM
I got something on my t-shirt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 September, 2009, 01:32:41 AM
Sorry to hear about the t-shirt. What are you writing essays for these days?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2009, 01:35:50 AM
It was the introductory module for the OU Social Science MA. I doubt that I'm going to continue.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 September, 2009, 03:28:44 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2009, 01:35:50 AM
It was the introductory module for the OU Social Science MA. I doubt that I'm going to continue.

Really? That bad? Rise above it. It should be a walk in the park for you. So long as it's worth whatever fees they're stinging you for.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2009, 10:17:55 AM
I tried to post a confession on the Kingsmill Confessions website but it got moderated.  :(

http://www.kingsmillbread.com/campaigns/kingsmill-confessions/fridge
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 September, 2009, 11:14:30 PM
What if the only thing keeping Margaret Thatcher alive is the champagne I'm keeping on ice for when she snuffs it, working like some sort of magic talisman?

:o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 22 September, 2009, 11:26:31 PM
OH HoU, don't upset me by making me think there's some sort of TIE KEEPING HER HERE. 

Drink it now.  Just in case, eh?  For me?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2009, 11:30:43 PM
I drink a bottle of champagne every year to celebrate her glorious achievements.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 September, 2009, 11:39:59 PM
QuoteWhat if the only thing keeping Margaret Thatcher alive is the champagne I'm keeping on ice for when she snuffs it, working like some sort of magic talisman?

I reckon all that keeps her going is the fear that Elvis Costello will make a pile of royalties from airplay of Tramp the Dirt Down. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 22 September, 2009, 11:40:52 PM
Given that I was only alive for the last two and a half years of Baroness Thatcher's prime ministership, I have no real opinion of her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 22 September, 2009, 11:47:14 PM
I imagine Elvis Costello has done pretty well out of Thatcherism as have many of his sabre rattling pals.

Similar to millionaire Michael Moore who was on Jay leno's show decrying capitalism in support of his new film. Leno touched on the possibly hypocracy and Moore answered 'Oh we're putting on some free showings in depressed areas' - problem solved!

No problem in talented people doing well but I can't take them bitching about the people and systems who put them in their mansions.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 September, 2009, 11:56:51 PM
Quote from: Buttonman on 22 September, 2009, 11:47:14 PM
I imagine Elvis Costello has done pretty well out of Thatcherism as have many of his sabre rattling pals.

Similar to millionaire Michael Moore who was on Jay leno's show decrying capitalism in support of his new film. Leno touched on the possibly hypocracy and Moore answered 'Oh we're putting on some free showings in depressed areas' - problem solved!

No problem in talented people doing well but I can't take them bitching about the people and systems who put them in their mansions.

Micheal Moore is just an extreme hypocrite and i am not even going to start on him.

Multi-multi-multi-millionaire anti-capitalist hypocrite Liberal.

As far as i am concerned the only thing he should do with his mouth when he opens it is to shove more pies into it.

Its good that has an extreme obesity problem because it means that he will die sooner rather than later.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:08:23 AM
Damnit BM, you're right!  Far better political songwriters and filmmakers confine themselves to making cassettes in their garrets and live off the dole - how dare they achieve widespread recognition in the very milieux they decry!  As Christy Moore jokingly commented in a concert I was at in 1989, "Christ, I hope they don't listen to me and let the Birmingham Six out - that's half my act!".

And as for those doctors - they make a bloody good living off all this sickness they claim to be against.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 September, 2009, 12:11:56 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 September, 2009, 11:39:59 PM
I reckon all that keeps her going is the fear that Elvis Costello will make a pile of royalties from airplay of Tramp the Dirt Down.

Now THAT made me laugh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 23 September, 2009, 12:22:25 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:08:23 AM
Damnit BM, you're right!  Far better political songwriters and filmmakers confine themselves to making cassettes in their garrets and live off the dole - how dare they achieve widespread recognition in the very milieux they decry!  As Christy Moore jokingly commented in a concert I was at in 1989, "Christ, I hope they don't listen to me and let the Birmingham Six out - that's half my act!".

And as for those doctors - they make a bloody good living off all this sickness they claim to be against.

He could, I guess, donate all of his royalties to a workers cooperative and live off the average wage of a skilled worker? Naw, I'll take the pile of cash and the unfeasable moral high ground to boot. Can't have it both ways and not be a hypocrite. Bit like Bonio lecturing the Irish government on their foreign aid policy only to have it pointed out to him by the Prime Minister that he doesn't pay any taxes. What a tosser.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:31:34 AM
Quote from: Buttonman on 23 September, 2009, 12:22:25 AM
Bit like Bonio lecturing the Irish government on their foreign aid policy only to have it pointed out to him by the Prime Minister that he doesn't pay any taxes. What a tosser.

Does his not paying taxes make his point any less valid?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 September, 2009, 12:32:50 AM
I think you three should all make out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:33:56 AM
QuoteDoes his not paying taxes make his point any less valid?

If we're waiting for the non-hypocrites to appear and show us the way, we'll be waiting a while.  Best to get on with it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:35:14 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 23 September, 2009, 12:32:50 AM
I think you three should all make out.

Define 'you three'.   :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:38:21 AM
Quote from: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:35:14 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 23 September, 2009, 12:32:50 AM
I think you three should all make out.

Define 'you three'.   :-\

Don't define 'make out'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 23 September, 2009, 12:38:48 AM
Yes it does - if he's not contributing why should he have a say in its allocation? It's not even as if he's paying the going rate somewhere else what with his off shore corporations. How many stupid hats does he need?

No taxation without representation goes both ways, self rightious prick - him not you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:43:35 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:38:21 AM
Quote from: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:35:14 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 23 September, 2009, 12:32:50 AM
I think you three should all make out.

Define 'you three'.   :-\

Don't define 'make out'.

Touché.


Wait, don't do that either.


Quote from: Buttonman on 23 September, 2009, 12:38:48 AM
Yes it does - if he's not contributing why should he have a say in its allocation? It's not even as if he's paying the going rate somewhere else what with his off shore corporations. How many stupid hats does he need?

No taxation without representation goes both ways, self rightious prick - him not you.

Well, 'no taxation without representation' normally refers to being taxed without having a representative in the legislature that sets the taxes.  He doesn't have a say in its allocation through the legislature, merely by the force of his argument.  And surely if his arguments are solid, it shouldn't matter whether he is Irish or not, let alone whether he pays Irish taxes or not, those arguments should be put to the Irish government.

On the other hand, I suppose you can be right and a tosser.  :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 September, 2009, 12:53:28 AM
I haven't got a lot of time for Bono, me. Nor Sting. I've always been more interested in decent pop music than musicians' politics. My favourite Elvis Costello albums are This Year's Model (1978) and Armed Forces (1979) because he made great pop music then. I lost interest in him after I was nine. My mum still liked him though.


And my favourite Billy Bragg songs are 'New England' and 'Man in the Iron Mask', not 'Between the Wars'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 01:05:00 AM
QuoteArmed Forces (1979)

A truly great album - permanently ensconced on my MP3 player, terrific driving music.  Never cottoned to Billy Bragg myself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 23 September, 2009, 01:10:13 AM
Billy Bragg you say?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6-JZH2R5GI (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6-JZH2R5GI)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 05:00:39 PM
Quote from: Odd_Bloke on 22 September, 2009, 11:40:52 PM
Given that I was only alive for the last two and a half years of Baroness Thatcher's prime ministership, I have no real opinion of her.

I'm sorry, but you're doing it wrong.  You do realise that this is the internet, don't you?  Baseless opinion stated as fact is where it's at...  8)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 September, 2009, 05:13:40 PM
I only managed to read 80 pages of Gaunts Ghosts at work last night instead of the planned 150. I suppose I'll read the end in bed tonight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 05:27:36 PM
Quote from: King Trout on 21 September, 2009, 01:39:12 PM
Thanks for the thoughts on phonics, all. Rose is only in the crazily-named "ante-pre-school" year but I'll remember, and keep an eye on things.

We're lucky to live where we do, with lots of great little village schools nearby. But it can't hurt to get involved.

- Trout

We took the decision not to not push reading and writing on Lottie before she started school as that's what school is for.  As somebody else has already mentioned, you run the risk of your child being bored out of their mind, with the end result being that they lose interest and actually go backwards.  Plus, you know, they're at school for a long time- so why not just let them play for as long as they can?

Lottie's just started in Reception (or the infants, as we used to call it) and is doing the phonics thing now.  She seems to be getting the hang of it so far and I'm really enjoying reading the books with her- but I'll let you know if we have any particular problems with it.  I think the main thing is that you have to be prepared, as a parent, to go the extra mile yourself.  The sad truth is that teachers are burdened with a lot of crap these days- and whereas you shouldn't have to step in and pick up their slack- that's exactly what you're going to have to do if you genuinely want to help your child.

As for teachers themselves- you get good and bad.  From my own point of view- and from personal experience- I think you're probably better off not getting in a teacher's face every five minutes unless it's absolutely necessary.  Do it too many times with a bad teacher and your child will probably suffer in the classroom as a result.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 September, 2009, 05:47:40 PM
Quote from: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:43:35 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:38:21 AM
Quote from: Odd_Bloke on 23 September, 2009, 12:35:14 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 23 September, 2009, 12:32:50 AM
I think you three should all make out.

Define 'you three'.   :-\

Don't define 'make out'.


Touché.


Wait, don't do that either.


Quote from: Buttonman on 23 September, 2009, 12:38:48 AM
Yes it does - if he's not contributing why should he have a say in its allocation? It's not even as if he's paying the going rate somewhere else what with his off shore corporations. How many stupid hats does he need?

No taxation without representation goes both ways, self rightious prick - him not you.

Well, 'no taxation without representation' normally refers to being taxed without having a representative in the legislature that sets the taxes.  He doesn't have a say in its allocation through the legislature, merely by the force of his argument.  And surely if his arguments are solid, it shouldn't matter whether he is Irish or not, let alone whether he pays Irish taxes or not, those arguments should be put to the Irish government.

On the other hand, I suppose you can be right and a tosser.  :P

We have taxation without representation here and in the US.We dont have a say in anything least of all where tax revenue is spent.Or rather we do have a say but it is usually ignored.


Taxation with representation is tyranny.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 05:50:23 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 12:08:23 AM
Damnit BM, you're right!  Far better political songwriters and filmmakers confine themselves to making cassettes in their garrets and live off the dole - how dare they achieve widespread recognition in the very milieux they decry!  As Christy Moore jokingly commented in a concert I was at in 1989, "Christ, I hope they don't listen to me and let the Birmingham Six out - that's half my act!".

And as for those doctors - they make a bloody good living off all this sickness they claim to be against.

I remember reading about Ben Elton refusing to send his kids to private school, opting instead to move house so that they would be in the catchment area for the schools that they wanted.  All very laudable- until you consider that doing so meant that somebody else, slightly further away from the school, would then be out of the same catchment area and in a worse school.

Nice one, Ben!

::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 23 September, 2009, 07:09:52 PM
Quote from: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 05:27:36 PM
We took the decision not to not push reading and writing on Lottie before she started school as that's what school is for.
My parents took the attitude that I was asking to learn to read and they had both read before school, so why not.  Horses for courses Matt and I respect your view.

I will add one tiny thing though: if a child happens to be precocious/gifted/godlike/annoying/snotty/brattish enough to actually be able to read before school starts, a teacher should be on-the-ball enough to be able to keep an eye on kids of various levels of attainment or ability.  Giving little me a book a level above the other kids while they learnt to identify letters, words etc wouldn't have killed her.  As it turned out her lack of ability at her job very nearly turned me right off school for ever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 08:51:01 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 23 September, 2009, 07:09:52 PM
Quote from: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 05:27:36 PM
We took the decision not to not push reading and writing on Lottie before she started school as that's what school is for.
My parents took the attitude that I was asking to learn to read and they had both read before school, so why not.  Horses for courses Matt and I respect your view.

I will add one tiny thing though: if a child happens to be precocious/gifted/godlike/annoying/snotty/brattish enough to actually be able to read before school starts, a teacher should be on-the-ball enough to be able to keep an eye on kids of various levels of attainment or ability.  Giving little me a book a level above the other kids while they learnt to identify letters, words etc wouldn't have killed her.  As it turned out her lack of ability at her job very nearly turned me right off school for ever.

Yeah, fair enough.  I'm not really saying that you shouldn't teach your kids to read, just that we chose not to.  That said, we already knew from teachers and other friends that boredom can be a big problem for kids that are too far ahead when they first start school- otherwise, we probably would have taught Lottie.  We did teach her about numbers, but that seemed like less of a big deal.

And it sounds like you just had a bit of a duff teacher - which unfortunately does happen.  I remember there being two Mrs Griffiths at our school- one was really nice and the other obviously hated children.  They were known as 'Mrs Griffiths' and 'the nice Mrs Griffiths'.  Three guesses which one I got stuck with!

:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 September, 2009, 12:33:52 AM
Quote from: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 08:51:01 PM
They were known as 'Mrs Griffiths' and 'the nice Mrs Griffiths'.  Three guesses which one I got stuck with!

Reminds me of the two girls on my mate's art college foundation course who no-one else liked and hung around together as a pair. When one of them overheard someone refer to her friend as 'Thin Henna' she worked out what her own nickname was, and she went ape-shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 24 September, 2009, 10:26:35 AM
.. my smoke alarm has started beeping. A single beep every 2 mins. Probably needs a new battery but its a PITA to get too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 24 September, 2009, 10:38:28 AM
2GB is proving to be insufficient.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 24 September, 2009, 11:10:01 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 24 September, 2009, 12:33:52 AM
Quote from: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 08:51:01 PM
They were known as 'Mrs Griffiths' and 'the nice Mrs Griffiths'.  Three guesses which one I got stuck with!

Reminds me of the two girls on my mate's art college foundation course who no-one else liked and hung around together as a pair. When one of them overheard someone refer to her friend as 'Thin Henna' she worked out what her own nickname was, and she went ape-shit.

Bah!  Who removed the laughing smiley?!?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 24 September, 2009, 02:20:28 PM
 :D :D

Have two more, they're cheep and make up for Nasty Mrs Griffiths.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 September, 2009, 03:02:35 PM
.
Quote.. my smoke alarm has started beeping. A single beep every 2 mins. Probably needs a new battery but its a PITA to get too.


It's the battery alright.  For Grud's sake fix it now Mike, I've been in exactly one burning house too many, and it was only the fire alarm that (narrowly) prevented multiple deaths.  It's not a sight I'll ever forget.  If Bou were here she'd boot your arse up that ladder in jig time.  You don't want that waiting for you at the end of the Helltrek.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 September, 2009, 03:53:45 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 September, 2009, 01:05:00 AM
QuoteArmed Forces (1979)

A truly great album - permanently ensconced on my MP3 player, terrific driving music.  Never cottoned to Billy Bragg myself.

I am not a big fan of Billy Bragg either but i do unhesitantly recommend an album called Dont Try This At Home.

It features a guitar ,bass,and drums line up rather than just Billy Bragg on his own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 24 September, 2009, 04:21:10 PM
Don't Try This At Home's a great album.

Also: FIX THE DAMN ALARM NOW! It's only a battery. You wouldn't believe how many stories we run where people died in a fire and the smoke alarm didn't go off. It would break your heart.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 24 September, 2009, 04:32:08 PM
We're going to keep posting until you fix it.  Think of us as a helpful internet "beeping" service.

BEEP!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 September, 2009, 05:28:45 PM
Oops, I got the Nemeses mixed up, made a right warlocks of it.  It's James S that needs to get his bloody finger out.  BEEEEEEEP!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 25 September, 2009, 12:48:42 AM
Quote from: King Trout on 24 September, 2009, 04:21:10 PM
Don't Try This At Home's a great album.
When Billy toured that album me and my mate went to all three Scottish dates. Glasgow, Aberdeen and Edinburgh. At the age of 16 it was the most rock'n'roll thing I'd ever done.

"Ah've 'ad relay-shuns..
Wiv gurls from many nay-shuns!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 September, 2009, 01:04:46 PM
Despite having a GAMEBOY Advance and two DSs in the house, we've managed to end up with only one charger between the three of them.

So I used to keep it safe in a bedside cabinet so it wouldn't get lost.

And now someone has lost it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 September, 2009, 01:07:44 PM
No matter how funny you think it is, do not try this at home.

WIFE:  AND IT TURNS OUT THAT VALERIE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR.

TIPLODOCUS: (mugging furiously as if suddenly worried about something):  ER... THEY DIDN'T SAY WITH WHO DID THEY?

Well, I thought it would get a laugh...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 25 September, 2009, 01:10:50 PM
I'd have laughed... have you left the charger at Cam Kennedy's by any chance?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 September, 2009, 04:11:17 PM
While searching for a trailer for Surrogate on Youtube i noticed that the search function is inactive.

Get over this problem by searching from your channel page instead which works fine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 September, 2009, 09:23:14 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 25 September, 2009, 12:48:42 AM
"Ah've 'ad relay-shuns..
Wiv gurls from many nay-shuns!"

I've never forgiven Billy Bragg for that lyric because I... haven't.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 26 September, 2009, 10:44:27 PM
"Sayfe secks dusn't meen naw secks / it juust meens youse yer imm-agin-ayy-shun!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 September, 2009, 10:45:50 PM
My left foot hurts from kicking small animals. I don't know why, prolly bad posture.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 26 September, 2009, 10:47:46 PM
Not sex then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 26 September, 2009, 10:50:49 PM
Hot, stupid and gay STAR WARS sex.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 September, 2009, 09:22:59 PM
She-Wolf didn't get to number one.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 September, 2009, 09:29:11 PM
I was up late the other night and I saw that video. WOW.  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 27 September, 2009, 09:32:20 PM
Only heard about it today.

Not only is she named after a Twoth character (kinda) but she's also BARKING MAD.  Just like the strip she shares her name with.  I don't think her next album can afford NOT to feature a song where she bellows her name repeatedly throughout.

I like her.  She has the courage to be insane.  That's rare. 

Haven't seen the video, I'm not given to watching such things I'm afraid.  Should I break the habit of a lifetime?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 September, 2009, 08:51:51 AM
QuoteShould I break the habit of a lifetime?

You should possibly consider it. It's very odd, and there aren't enough Teknosaurs, but it makes me wish I was 20 years younger, good looking, charming, rich and fluent in Spanish (mind you, I wish for all that most mornings).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 September, 2009, 09:37:38 AM
Settle down with a nice cup of hot coffee and a biscuit while I show my age...

Dude, it was amazing! I was working late and sodding about on the laptop with the TV just, you know, on. There had been a documentary on with Dawn Porter naked again, and I wouldn't want to have missed that, and afterwards I couldn't be bothered to check the Radio Times so I left it on Channel 4 +1.

I didn't pay much attention to what was on in between, but eventually 4Music's Top 20 put in an appearance. I didn't even know there were still chart music shows after the demise of The Chart Show and Top of the Pops and Ready Steady Go! To start with I scoffed at all the cloth-eared identikit robot music - the gullible kids will swallow any old soulless, geneticially engineered, computer-generated synth-pop - but before long had it worked its spell on me! Some of it started to work on areas of the brain I didn't even know I had. Not the bits that process meaning, but the bits that presumably click to MDMA if one is so inclined to dabble, which I'm not - and I've no idea what I'm talking about! But no wonder the vacuous, empty-headed youth of today are getting so immersed in 21st century disposable consumerism and rejecting comprehension in favour of visceral experience. Why hear the music and process meaning when you can simply feel it instead? The advent of video meant the experience of listening to music became inextricably bound up with the visual imagery used in its marketing. It seems the next stage in pop's evolution is to leave both music and emotion behind and become a medium for experiencing physical sensation. It's like the 'feelies' in Aldous Huxley's Brave New World, except the medium is audio not visual.

No doubt Marshall McCluhan wouldn't have been at all surprised at this development. His famous phrase 'the medium is the message' communicated a simple but startlingly original idea: that no medium is about its content, it's about the form in which the content is transmitted. Television isn't about EastEnders, it's about television.

Pop music has now discarded the media of the CD and the radio. It was never about music. It was always about thrusting hips. Now, finally, it has done away with the music altogether, and thrusting hips is both the medium and the message. And boy, do you ever feel it. Right in the back of your head. (Pssst! You're doing it wrong!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 September, 2009, 10:08:07 AM
QuoteNow, finally, it has done away with the music altogether, and thrusting hips is both the medium and the message.

The medium is the massage?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 28 September, 2009, 11:26:29 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 27 September, 2009, 09:32:20 PM
Haven't seen the video, I'm not given to watching such things I'm afraid.  Should I break the habit of a lifetime?

That depends if you like ladies' hips and have a plentiful supply of tissues.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 28 September, 2009, 11:30:34 AM
Shakira is ace because of that song that goes: "For you, I would give up everything I own and flee to a Communist country."

And being an extremely sexy lady. She sometimes moves in a very unnerving way. Like a tiny robot disco-spider.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 September, 2009, 12:06:38 PM
I've just remembered the disarmingly frank explanation of washer-up Oleg in the sleeper hit and stupidly sabotaged BBC3 comedy 'Pulling', in the scene where he explains to Louise his preference for thumping hardcore on his headphones.

"I like music I can feel in my cock" - words to that effect.  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 September, 2009, 12:20:36 PM
I recall a conversation in a site hut where a very intelligent fellow was humming 'Hips Don't Lie' one tea-break, only to be rounded on by the ubiquitous self-appointed musical expert:

"For fecks sake man, what could you possibly like about Shakira?". 
"I'm not gay".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 September, 2009, 03:04:20 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 28 September, 2009, 11:30:34 AM
Shakira is ace because of that song that goes: "For you, I would give up everything I own and flee to a Communist country."



Thats dedication for you !

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 September, 2009, 03:26:01 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 28 September, 2009, 03:04:20 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 28 September, 2009, 11:30:34 AM
Shakira is ace because of that song that goes: "For you, I would give up everything I own and flee to a Communist country."



Thats dedication for you !



The very definition of horror to the vacuous, empty-headed youth of today, immersed as they are in 21st century disposable consumerism and rejecting comprehension in favour of visceral experience. The very definition of horror at least, that is, to the small section of said youth that has actually heard of communism. So lacking in imagination. They've probably never even heard of Letter to Brezhnev either, let alone seen in. I'll bet they've never fallen in love with a Russian sailor either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 September, 2009, 04:14:19 PM
QuoteI'll bet they've never fallen in love with a Russian sailor either.

Not like Billy Bragg.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 September, 2009, 07:36:30 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 28 September, 2009, 03:26:01 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 28 September, 2009, 03:04:20 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 28 September, 2009, 11:30:34 AM
Shakira is ace because of that song that goes: "For you, I would give up everything I own and flee to a Communist country."



Thats dedication for you !



The very definition of horror to the vacuous, empty-headed youth of today, immersed as they are in 21st century disposable consumerism and rejecting comprehension in favour of visceral experience. The very definition of horror at least, that is, to the small section of said youth that has actually heard of communism. So lacking in imagination. They've probably never even heard of Letter to Brezhnev either, let alone seen in. I'll bet they've never fallen in love with a Russian sailor either.


You would have to give up everything you own or spend it all before you fled to a Communmist country otherwise if you took everything with you the state would confiscate/steal it all off you anyway.

I would change the next verse of that song or add to it "I would do anything for you/love but i wont do that !"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 29 September, 2009, 11:38:15 AM
Why do clients constantly send logos embedded in Word documents - from where it's a pain to get the images out cleanly. Why do they think this step of putting a logo into a Word document is necessary and don't just send the images on their own?

AIEEEE!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 29 September, 2009, 11:48:56 AM
Quote from: Banners on 29 September, 2009, 11:38:15 AM
Why do clients constantly send logos embedded in Word documents - from where it's a pain to get the images out cleanly. Why do they think this step of putting a logo into a Word document is necessary and don't just send the images on their own?
AIEEEE! M@
I used to do a regular project where we would need print logos for the major media companies in the UK. Despite these organisations having design departments to deal with sending that sort of stuff out, so often our contacts would just drag the logos off their company homepage, stick them in PowerPoint, Word etc then be baffled when we would say we can't use them for repro.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 29 September, 2009, 11:52:37 AM
It's better than being given a business card and being told to work with the logo off that I guess. Been asked to build entire websites based on a business card.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 29 September, 2009, 11:56:12 AM
Thank you for feeling my pain. Logos taken from home pages is pretty common. Worse than business cards are blocky, mono scanned letterheads they send.

When you then spend time recreating the logo as a decent vector (AI's live trace only gets you so far), the client asks if you can send them a copy as, wow, it looks so much better. When you tell them that if they want it, they'll be charged for the time, they strangely go quiet...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 29 September, 2009, 12:10:52 PM
Yup. Had that recently. Put together an advert and just couldn't get a decent quality logo off client, despite the fact that someone somewhere drew it. So rather than produce a crappy advert I just ate crap and redrew the logo. Few weeks on, client asks me to email the logo and I ended up spending ages doing the cmyk, rgb, jpeg, size variations etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2009, 12:41:56 PM
Daughter's flat burgled.

And her and her boyfriend aren't insured because they forgot to take out cover when they cancelled a bank account that had previously provided it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 29 September, 2009, 01:34:33 PM
Ah, shit, Tips. Very sorry to hear that. But I suspect you have the wrong thread. Life spugs.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 September, 2009, 01:41:33 PM
QuoteAh, shit, Tips. Very sorry to hear that. But I suspect you have the wrong thread. Life spugs.


S'right.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2009, 06:24:36 PM
Well they had a fair bit of stuff taken but nobody hurt, they weren't in flat at time so not as creepy as it might be and, after all, it is only just stuff they lost.


It still probably SPUGS for them but it's a minor impediment for me; I can see me having to buy a new laptop to help through final year of OT course etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 29 September, 2009, 08:00:44 PM
I bruised my heel earlier, which is going to make the 20 minute walk home more than a little uncomfortable (and probably more than 20 minutes).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 September, 2009, 08:25:35 PM
Me and Sam just walked back home via the town centre. He wanted a cheeseburger from MacDonalds so we popped in. I asked for two and said don't bother with a bag as we'll take them in just the wrapper. The lass turned around, picked up two cheeseburgers and (yes you know what's coming next) placed them into a brown bag.

What is the FUCKING point >:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Odd_Bloke on 29 September, 2009, 08:26:48 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 September, 2009, 08:25:35 PM
Me and Sam just walked back home via the town centre. He wanted a cheeseburger from MacDonalds so we popped in. I asked for two and said don't bother with a bag as we'll take them in just the wrapper. The lass turned around, picked up two cheeseburgers and (yes you know what's coming next) placed them into a brown bag.

What is the FUCKING point >:( >:(

If you don't completely disengage your brain when working in a place like McDonalds you go insane in fairly short order.   :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 September, 2009, 08:28:42 PM
But I said it so politely ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 29 September, 2009, 10:31:36 PM
There isn't a lot to think about in jobs like McDonalds - they deliberately remove that from the job description.  Hence folks minds are rarely entirely ON the job (because it's been deskilled to the point of meaningless) and stupid mistakes like that happen. 

Not the end of the world though, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 September, 2009, 10:44:01 PM
Think of the environment :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 29 September, 2009, 10:47:31 PM
the press, we have been trying to get the HPV vaccinations up and running (the jade goody one) and today the news rambles on about a girl dying after having her hpv vaccinaion... cue, many phone calls and stressy staff.



still it takes the focus offa swine flu of which i have to have a "mask fitting" as a front line staff member and no i dont know what it about.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2009, 10:48:47 PM
Can't find Insurance documents for teh Green Dragon and it needs it's tax doing tomorrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2009, 10:51:28 PM
3 hours and 10 minutes into KINGDOM OF HEAVEN and I discover that the digibox hasn't taped the whole film. (Someone probably unplugged it).

I'd never seen it before and was quite enjoying it - directors cut with overture and intermission, Orlando bloom in typical understated (or is that wooden?) mode and some brief but spectacular action sequences.  Eva Green looking to die for and Michael Sheen being brilliant with a fantastic end. 

I take it he loses Jerusalem but what happens next...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2009, 10:52:40 PM
gAH!  My nice Arran malt is ever so slightly spoilt by the fact it's in a chipped glass. One of our nice crystal ones too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2009, 11:06:06 PM
Actually KINGDOM OF HEAVEN - don't tell me the end but please tell me who was behind the mask of Baldwin the Leper king?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 29 September, 2009, 11:09:57 PM
I know, the environmental impact of unnecessary garbage is huge, but still - the impact on the workforce having their jobs de-skilled systematically in order to ensure they're not worth paying properly is the real deal.  That disempowers the staff and makes them less likely to be paying attention to either customer service OR considerations like the environment.  The firm is the enemy, not the poor sap behind the till or flipping the burger.

Or maybe, just maybe I've thought about this too much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 September, 2009, 11:24:57 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 September, 2009, 08:25:35 PM
Me and Sam just walked back home via the town centre. He wanted a cheeseburger from MacDonalds so we popped in. I asked for two and said don't bother with a bag as we'll take them in just the wrapper. The lass turned around, picked up two cheeseburgers and (yes you know what's coming next) placed them into a brown bag.

What is the FUCKING point >:( >:(
Tomorrow, go into MacDonalds. Ask for a regular Big Mac meal with Fanta. Now stand back and wait for them to ask whether you want to go large and what drink do you want with that. I've never worked in one, but I always assumed they just have the sequence of questions and button presses drilled into them at the start and told never to deviate or you might get something wrong.

Very annoying though.

That's a bit shit about Tips' daughter's flat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 September, 2009, 11:38:20 PM
Yes it's true, Mike. There's always middle class high-consumers telling us to do our bit for the environment by refusing carrier bags and other bits of tat packaging while they peruse the travel brochures for environmentally sustainable low-impact tropical scuba-diving holidays.

My current job relies quite heavily upon teaching staff doing unpaid work in their own time. I currently teach a course with three empty student places and a waiting list of about 7 prospective students. We also have a salaried admin staff, on premises 12 hours a day (shift changeovers intervene, but there's always someone there), whose job isn't to contact waiting students and fit them onto courses with vacancies.

That's the job of the course tutor who is expected to phone those prospective students in the coffee breaks during classes or the turnaround portion between classes that's also for scheduled breaks, photocopying, tidying up, switching lessons, paperwork, pastoral business and going to the lavatory.

Consequently, new students get signed up to fill gaps only if time permits and the student happens to be in, or it's possible to leave a voice message, during the interval it's possible to make phonecalls. If this time can't be found or made, then one tries again the next day or the whole business has to wait another week. I don't really want to be phoning prospective students at home on my day off!

Fortunately I have a class tomorrow that involves 40 minutes of writing in silence. An opportunity presents itself at last, I think.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 September, 2009, 09:30:52 AM
QuoteI've never worked in one, but I always assumed they just have the sequence of questions and button presses drilled into them at the start and told never to deviate or you might get something wrong.

I have, long ago and mercifully briefly, and that was precisely how it worked then at least. You literally had to stop thinking and just become a cog - I couldn't hack it, even though my front-of-house time was minimal.   

I subsequently took another high-turnover food-service job with considerable trepidation, but after a steep initiation process I absolutely loved it, did it for 5 years and wouldn't mind going back. Reason?  We were encouraged to interact with the customers and and our co-workers, and as a result the hours flew by.  And it paid nearly twice as much as MD's, I might add. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 30 September, 2009, 03:14:44 PM
In my experience, ordering food from fast 'food' joints is akin to ordering from a vending machine. The staff can be like robots who seem to expect you to order the same food and drinks as everyone else. Can't remember the last time I went to MacDonalds. I last went to KFC six years ago (out of desperation) and to Subway a few years ago. In both cases I tried to order without a fizzy drink and the staff virtually short-circuited. To think, there are weirdos out there who don't drink fizzy drinks.

In the last few years I pretty much gave my life savings to Pret A Manger. I really like their food, excellent coffee and staff are friendly (bit too friendly actually as one was hitting on me last year so I never went to that branch again). But it turns out that their grub is not as healthy as they make out, as some of it is jam packed with salt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 30 September, 2009, 03:20:40 PM
Mmm... jam.

Anyway, today I spent half the morning shifting furniture around, in preparation for building my daughter's new bed.
I cleared out most of her bedroom, bringing her old bed (a cot bed) downstairs, ready for a new mattress and the new baby. Then I gave her room a good hoover, and lugged the giant flat-pack boxes of new bed bits upstairs.

But guess what? The new bed had a big gouge out of it, near where her head will be. It's bad enough to be a safety issue - it would scratch her - never mind the fact it's horribly ruined. So I had to repack the new bed, shift the boxes back downstairs, and bring the old bed back up.

Now my back's killing me and I'm knackered. I've achieved nothing for all my sweaty efforts. A replacement's coming on Saturday, so that's my weekend shafted.

Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 September, 2009, 04:01:50 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 30 September, 2009, 03:14:44 PM
In my experience, ordering food from fast 'food' joints is akin to ordering from a vending machine. The staff can be like robots who seem to expect you to order the same food and drinks as everyone else. Can't remember the last time I went to MacDonalds. I last went to KFC six years ago (out of desperation) and to Subway a few years ago. In both cases I tried to order without a fizzy drink and the staff virtually short-circuited. To think, there are weirdos out there who don't drink fizzy drinks.

In the last few years I pretty much gave my life savings to Pret A Manger. I really like their food, excellent coffee and staff are friendly (bit too friendly actually as one was hitting on me last year so I never went to that branch again). But it turns out that their grub is not as healthy as they make out, as some of it is jam packed with salt.


I have been going to BK lately but only because i have got a load of 2 for one vouchers plus the fact that they do Aberdeen Angus beef otherwise i wouldnt eat there.

I called in last week to get 2 double Angus burgers and when i got home they were both singles so half my dinner was missing.3 times i stressed that i was paying for doubles and not singles but they still get it wrong.

This was caused by a language barrier.I only talk English and dont see why i need to be fluent in half a dozen languages just to order a take out meal.They are in the UK so speak English.




I always have no bacon either and they always get that right.



I admit that this was a one off though and i have never had the problem with fizzy drinks in either BK or Subway.They usually just ask if i want any drink with it and i always say no thanks.The staff in BK are usually pretty good in my local BK joint.All their packaging is cardboard as well.No polystyrene

This "would you like fries with that ?" has always been a joke with Mcdonalds and you used to be able to buy a Tshirt with "If i want fries i will fucking ask for them !"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 September, 2009, 04:17:18 PM
QuoteNow my back's killing me and I'm knackered. I've achieved nothing for all my sweaty efforts. A replacement's coming on Saturday, so that's my weekend shafted.

I feel your pain, yer Maj.  I've spent almost all my alleged free time moving stuff (i.e. comics, books, files and Star Wars crapola) around to create space for our recent arrival, who's currently in residence in our bedroom but won't be forever.  We are one room short, and unfortunately the child who's going to lose it out is me.

I put it in boxes, I stack it in neat piles, I squeeze it onto shelves, I take it out to the shed, I try to force it into the attic, I bring it all back where it came from and look at it again, but it never seems to do any good.  

I know the bible has something to say on the subject of putting away childish things, but it's frustratingly silent on where.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 September, 2009, 06:35:46 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 30 September, 2009, 04:01:50 PM
I always have no bacon either and they always get that right.
The BASTARDS!  ;D

Quote from: The Cosh on 29 September, 2009, 11:24:57 PM
Tomorrow, go into MacDonalds. Ask for a regular Big Mac meal with Fanta. Now stand back and wait for them to ask whether you want to go large and what drink do you want with that.

True - try going into subway and asking for a Bacon, lettuce & tomato WITH NO CHEESE - they still ask you if you want cheese. There's a big difference between following a script they've been ordered to and just plain not listening. One deserves sympathy the other contempt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 01 October, 2009, 09:16:51 AM
... the gas (I presume) in the lever that holds the boot hatch open on the not-so mighty Bolt-mobile has given up so the flipping thing is going to be dropping on my head all the time when I'm loading for the weekend.

... I've got a bitch of a cough/sore throat! Typical.

... Zarjaz has sold so well on pre-order that I don't think I've enough for the con and not enough time to get more done! First come first served!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 October, 2009, 12:05:23 PM
Someone has stolen the toothpaste.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 01 October, 2009, 01:26:34 PM
Tordel, I have similar problems, as the boy's arrival in about six weeks means we have officially run out of rooms.

I have various solutions in place, starting with clearing out much of the loft, so I can shift more stuff in there. It was all shit, anyway. My wife has agreed we can have some shelves in the living room, with graphic novels on. They'll be the nicer ones, with matching spines and all that. I'm quite looking forward to it.

Parents have no time for comics anyway.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 October, 2009, 01:47:46 PM
QuoteMy wife has agreed we can have some shelves in the living room, with graphic novels on. They'll be the nicer ones, with matching spines and all that.

Detente has been achieved on this subject in my own castle, and the assembly of allegedly-acceptable IKEA Billy bookcases is ongoing.

I've had to accept that my humongous SF/F novel collection is going to have to be decimated (they'll have to pry my LeGuins, Asimovs and McDevitts out of my cold dead hands, but maybe I can let my Hamiltons, Gibsons and Bears go), and have already moved most of my work-related books to my business premises, leaving only the prettier and more obscure.  My 2000ADs are non-negotiable, and most live in the attic anyway, but my '80s American comic mountain is coming out of the attic to make way for the rest, and will probably be heading to the charity shop.  Then begins the task of winnowing the Star Wars mountain, which I'm really not looking forward to.  

I will say that aside from the time involved (and the possibility of having  to lose some of  the Star Wars stuff), it's all well, well worth it - despite being up today since 1.45am with her squalling spider monkey alter ego, I can confirm that my daughter is worth a bonfire of geekphenalia such as the world has never seen, never mind dropping a box of X-Men and Tad Williams into Oxfam.

Don't believe me?  Click on!  http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=686369&l=e35dffeca3&id=1389214714
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 01 October, 2009, 01:48:30 PM
Quote from: Banners on 29 September, 2009, 11:56:12 AM
Thank you for feeling my pain. M@
Graphic Designer vs client
http://www.youtube.com/user/mentaldesigner#play/all/

Hope this helps to ease the pain, M@.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 01 October, 2009, 01:53:20 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 October, 2009, 01:47:46 PMmy daughter is worth a bonfire of geekphenalia such as the world has never seen

Well said that man. That's just how I feel!

Fantastic pic, by the way! PM me with your real name and I'll provide access to cute kid pics and much geekery on Facebook!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 01 October, 2009, 02:16:40 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 October, 2009, 01:47:46 PM
Detente has been achieved on this subject in my own castle, and the assembly of allegedly-acceptable IKEA Billy bookcases is ongoing.
I recently assembled Besta bookcases from IKEA. Pretty happy with them despite some assembly issues namely the back panel not fitting and me having to widen the groove for it to fit in.

I still have tons of comics elsewhere but I was recently reunited with these friends. While I can get away with it, they are proudly on display in my work room. Er, our second room.

Beautiful photo by the way, TordelBack.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 01 October, 2009, 02:18:28 PM
Quote from: SuperSurferHope this helps to ease the pain, M@.

Heh, thanks for that. We're doing some free work at the moment, trying to get that "foot in the door" - much against my better judgment. Annoyingly, they're being more fussy than our biggest proper clients(!)

(Gonna have to start a Designer's Woes thread one of these days...)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 01 October, 2009, 03:31:04 PM
I will add my tuppence if you do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 01 October, 2009, 03:37:52 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 01 October, 2009, 01:48:30 PM
Quote from: Banners on 29 September, 2009, 11:56:12 AM
Thank you for feeling my pain. M@
Graphic Designer vs client
http://www.youtube.com/user/mentaldesigner#play/all/

Hope this helps to ease the pain, M@.

I've saved this and renamed it as "Real life". Officially my favourite video now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 01 October, 2009, 04:38:17 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 01 October, 2009, 02:16:40 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 October, 2009, 01:47:46 PM
Detente has been achieved on this subject in my own castle, and the assembly of allegedly-acceptable IKEA Billy bookcases is ongoing.
I recently assembled Besta bookcases from IKEA. Pretty happy with them despite some assembly issues namely the back panel not fitting and me having to widen the groove for it to fit in.

I still have tons of comics elsewhere but I was recently reunited with these friends. While I can get away with it, they are proudly on display in my work room. Er, our second room.

Beautiful photo by the way, TordelBack.

Arh my attic eves are full of Ikea shelving (and the comics that so naturally go with them). How I remember the pain of putting together even these simple things!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 October, 2009, 10:35:32 AM
The demands of my teaching job have made me very tired and have adversely impacted on my performance in two interviews for much better paid jobs this week. Preparing for two job interviews this week has made me even more tired and adversely impacted on my alertness and the preparation time available for my teaching job. So rather than do one or the other exceptionally well, I've ended up doing both badly.

::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 October, 2009, 10:51:29 AM
Usher, you've encapsulated the demands of the academic perfectly.  Sorry they're weighing heavily on youl.  Hope you get a better job soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 October, 2009, 02:17:39 PM
I've been editing hard all day to meet a deadline for an important technical report, only to discover that the final section is almost entirely cut and pasted from two different uncredited internet sources, one of which was actually produced by the client to whom I'm supposed to be submitting this in 2 hours time.  Apparently the slight rewording that permitted this hybrid took my colleague (a former teacher) an entire week of work. 

The depressing bit is that the main reason I noticed this is that it was significantly better than anything else in the remainder of the report. 

Friday afternoon is no time for butt-kicking, but boy do I feel so inclined, as I sit down to rewrite 10 pages of plagarism. 

Why do people do it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 02 October, 2009, 02:36:57 PM
Kick his arse and call him a wanker. There's no excuse for that sort of theft, laziness and unprofessionalism.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 02 October, 2009, 02:38:14 PM
Quote from: King Trout on 02 October, 2009, 02:36:57 PM
There's no excuse for that sort of theft, laziness and unprofessionalism.

A career in tabloid journalism beckons ...

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 October, 2009, 02:48:51 PM
An entire week of work to cut and paste and plagarise ?

Unbelievable really.

Tell the lazy twat to get his act together fast.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 October, 2009, 03:35:55 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 October, 2009, 02:17:39 PM
Friday afternoon is no time for butt-kicking, but boy do I feel so inclined, as I sit down to rewrite 10 pages of plagarism.

Outrageous. They've been paid a week's wages for doing nothing, and tried to disguise the fact. At least in the past when I've done nothing it was plain for all to see. I'd never try to pass off someone else's work as my own. You'll have to wield the big stick on Monday morning.

Quote from: Mike Gloady on 02 October, 2009, 10:51:29 AM
Usher, you've encapsulated the demands of the academic perfectly.  Sorry they're weighing heavily on youl.  Hope you get a better job soon.

Thanks. The job I'm doing now isn't that bad. GCSE classes are a pleasure to teach. It's just one of those jobs that, by giving me plenty of work to do on my days off, gets in the way of pursuing other better remunerated opportunites.

The newsflash is although I got off to the worst start imaginable today, not being able to find the place in time, I still managed to give an interview performance that exceeded my expectations. I don't even mind if they offer me the job or not because at least I know I gave it my best shot and made a good impression in the end. Next week I can take my time over lesson preparation and just concentrate on the job I've already got, which is quite a relief!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 October, 2009, 03:52:41 PM
Lazy so-and-so needs to be made aware of 1. the utter stupidity of plagarism - you WILL be found out. 2. The massive increase in YOUR work-load as a result of his/her laziness and 3. the distinct possibility that he/she will be bounced like a tennis ball for that.  Does that count as gross misconduct I wonder?  Reckon it's close enough for jazz if it isn't.  Wield that big stick.  And stick it somewhere unpleasant.

*sound of lazy selfish scumbag sliding across pavement towards job centre*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 02 October, 2009, 04:14:32 PM
Laughs bitterly at Jim's use of the word "career".

There are no careers in journalism any more. It's dead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 October, 2009, 04:34:25 PM
Careers are a funny thing these days. It seems there are fewer employers who want to pay somebody day-in, day-out to be there all the time. It seems more and more employers are promoting patterns of working that only commit them to paying by the job or by the hour. It's really not conducive to careers as we used to know them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 02 October, 2009, 05:28:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 October, 2009, 02:17:39 PMFriday afternoon is no time for butt-kicking, but boy do I feel so inclined, as I sit down to rewrite 10 pages of plagarism.

That's grounds for a seriously frank exchange of views. Don't forget to wear your steel toe capped arse kicking boots TB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 02 October, 2009, 06:00:35 PM
Gaah! Literally going out of the door to meet the missus and a mate down my local for a couple of Friday pints and my phone goes.

Just in case it's notification of lateness on the part of either of the above, I check. No. It's an e-mail. Amends to ten pages of the lettering job that has to be complete by Monday.

What with me being at BICS all day tomorrow and away from the desktop machine until I get home on Sunday afternoon, that's my Friday evening down the crapper.

Bah!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 02 October, 2009, 06:39:01 PM
What kind of humourless so and so sends that sort of request on a Friday evening?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 02 October, 2009, 06:43:39 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 02 October, 2009, 06:39:01 PM
What kind of humourless so and so sends that sort of request on a Friday evening?

Unfortunately, the sort that's in a time zone where it's only quarter to two in the afternoon. :-(

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 October, 2009, 07:06:41 PM
Quote1. the utter stupidity of plagarism - you WILL be found out.

This is what mystifies me.  The person in question has completed a post-grad degree in the subject in question and has been a teacher so it's not like they're ignorant of the principle, and they know that I am an obsessively anal proof-reader.  It
was a very nice job, but when there are fabulously polished phrases expertly summing up whole areas of knowledge it doesn't take a genius to notice that you're reading something by the authority on the subject, and not just a colleague working to a deadline.

Quote2. The massive increase in YOUR work-load as a result of his/her laziness

Sadly, I've been really enjoying the work (Christ what's wrong with me!).  I spend so much of my time editing and arguing and mediating and playing with spreadsheets full of never-enough money that it's deeply pleasurable to just throw out a whole section, get my arse down the library and start from scratch.  It's buggering up my weekend no end but the client was okay about a postponement to Monday, and now that my kitchen table is groaning under the weight of library books and photocopies I'm as happy as the proverbial pig.  Mmmm, The Fiants of the Tudor Sovereigns, that's what I call a Friday night!


Quote3. the distinct possibility that he/she will be bounced like a tennis ball for that.  Does that count as gross misconduct I wonder?

Well it's certainly gross silliness, in a situation where I'm daily fighting to keep people in work, and running a business out of my mortgage account!   When the current spell of work finishes in December there'll probably have to be some redundancies, and I certainly wouldn't advise sticking my head above the parapet like that. 

A stern talk will be had. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 October, 2009, 08:38:45 PM
Do you pay this git's wages? If so, photocopy a bunch of tenners and give him them instead. Seems appropriate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 October, 2009, 09:07:18 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 October, 2009, 07:06:41 PM
The person in question has completed a post-grad degree in the subject in question and has been a teacher so it's not like they're ignorant of the principle, and they know that I am an obsessively anal-proof reader.
Fixed.  No charge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 October, 2009, 12:29:14 AM
Girlfriend's laptop is on the fritz. The LCD screen has gone weird. It's only weeks old. Back to the shop tomorrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 03 October, 2009, 03:07:14 AM
I hate taking stuff back to the shop.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 03 October, 2009, 02:13:00 PM
OK, so I mentioned winning a couple of free tickets for Mott The Hoople at the Hammersmith Apollo this coming Monday. Turns out everyone I know is either working or ill or just plain doesn't know how to rock.

I know I could probably flog the spare to a tout and make back some of my train fare, but I have a general dislike of those parasitic bastards and don't really want to fuel their greedy little industry.

Does anybody fancy laying claim to the second ticket?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 October, 2009, 02:31:06 PM
We've been checking our household finances. They're not good. Frivolous expenditure has been kept to a minimum, but we're still spending more than we're earning. My earnings are up on last year, but my partner's are down. My overdraft is stretched to its limit. And I don't get paid for September until the end of October, and so on for as long as I continue in my current employment.

:-X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 03 October, 2009, 03:29:30 PM
... When you've been at BICS for about two hours and you get a text telling you there's a family emergency and you need to drop everything and come home.

Apologies to -- well, everyone, really!

Bah!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 October, 2009, 03:40:32 PM
QuoteFrivolous expenditure has been kept to a minimum, but we're still spending more than we're earning.

An awful realisation, that.  Can feel like you're slipping backwards. Your situation sounds horribly like that of nearly all my academia-based friends, people who despite working like bastards earn so little that the government invariably owes them money at year's end.

Like you were saying earlier, in the absence of any real career structure (all over) what is usually presented as a life progression towards comfortable seniority has now become an endless series of snakes and ladders.  Looking at our own finances for September, our mortgage payments alone were twice our net income.  This is a short-mid-term thing, because the wife's on unpaid maternity leave, and I can't afford to pay myself until cashflow improves (which please grud it should by December), but it still means it's impossible to ever save or invest or whatever it is the cool kids do - you're just putting money away one month against the likelihood that there won't be any next month.  OTOH, the very variability of work circumstances means that change should be in your favour one day, as long as you keep plugging away. 

(hard to be pessimistic when i'm cuddling my daughter as i type!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 03 October, 2009, 05:32:24 PM
Fucking cock.

This had bloody well better be something serious, I had thought to myself on the way back home.

Well, it wasn't. In fact it was all pretty much sorted by the time I got back to Nottingham.

"Oh, you didn't have to drop everything and come back ..."

Then why the fuck did you tell me to drop everything and come back? For fuck's sake! And did anyone want to compensate me for the £100 I'm not out of pocket? Strangely, no.

Gaah!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 03 October, 2009, 08:51:09 PM
Jim, sounds shite.  Sympathy on the whole nasty situation.  Take care.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 03 October, 2009, 09:40:51 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 03 October, 2009, 08:51:09 PM
Jim, sounds shite.  Sympathy on the whole nasty situation.  Take care.

Thanks, Mike. It's just annoying more than anything else. Wolf. Cry. Not falling for that again. Fuckin' deal with it, or shut up!

Did get to say hello to Bolt, RAC, Watcher and Kevlev from this parish during my brief attendance, though. What a lovely collection of chaps!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 04 October, 2009, 02:24:10 AM
Would a free Mott The Hoople ticket help at all, Jim...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 04 October, 2009, 02:06:51 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 04 October, 2009, 02:24:10 AM
Would a free Mott The Hoople ticket help at all, Jim...?

Thank you -- genuinely -- for the thought, NB, but not my cup of tea ...

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 04 October, 2009, 05:47:29 PM
Jim is clearly no longer a "young dude"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2009, 06:27:09 PM
...unless he is, and that's why Mott the Hoople isn't his cup of tea! Most of the people I know who'd want to see Mott the Hoople are, er, old dudes.

;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 October, 2009, 06:59:30 PM
I spilt some gin in my salsa dip.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 04 October, 2009, 07:00:04 PM
I turned 35 today, not sure if that's nearly-old or sort-of-young(ish-ISH).  

Bowie is very MUCH my thing.  Mott the Hoople?  No.  Weren't they going to break up and Bowie didn't like that idea so wrote that song and "gave" them a hit to keep his mates in the game?  

Proof that charity can be misguided sometimes....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 October, 2009, 07:01:00 PM
According to yesterday's Guardian, the lead singer of Mott the Hoople is 70!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2009, 07:04:33 PM
35 is sort of young-ish. Nobody under 40 is middle aged. And gin goes okay with salsa - in fact, I sometimes cook with gin when we have fajitas. You just don't want to go getting tonic water in it. Fajitas with gin goes back to the Christmas I got olive oil with junipers in it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 October, 2009, 07:12:44 PM
Most of the actual spilt quantity went on the carpet and it was "mixed" with bitter lemon so it made no difference to the taste of the salsa.

One of the tortilla chips I was using to scoop said salsa dip broke under the weight of the dip and it went on the carpet. This has somewhat impeded my enjoyment of Richard Dawkins on C4 RIGHT NOW.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2009, 07:18:40 PM
RIGHT NOW watching Richard Dawkins on Channel 4. Hadn't otherwise thought about turning the TV on all day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 October, 2009, 07:24:57 PM
I'm a bit pissed off as I can't find my watch. I know it'll be in the last place I look, but I haven't looked there yet!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 October, 2009, 07:46:19 PM
Wife just took the piss out of me as she found my watch just now.
It was on the mantelpiece by the bed :-[ (it's an Edwardian house and they have fires in all the room, just in case you wondered what room we slept in)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2009, 08:35:52 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 October, 2009, 07:18:40 PM
RIGHT NOW watching Richard Dawkins on Channel 4. Hadn't otherwise thought about turning the TV on all day.

The phone rang, so Richard Dawkins didn't last long. Kylie Minogue guesting in a Christmas special of Dr Who was easier to watch with the sound off, so Dawkins was out-competed. That's selection pressure for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 04 October, 2009, 08:45:42 PM
i borrowed case files 5 from the library, and someone has drawn cocks on the dark judges.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 October, 2009, 08:56:16 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 04 October, 2009, 08:45:42 PM
i borrowed case files 5 from the library, and someone has drawn cocks on the dark judges.

That'll be Judge Anderson
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 04 October, 2009, 09:24:01 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 04 October, 2009, 08:45:42 PM
i borrowed case files 5 from the library, and someone has drawn cocks on the dark judges.

I was going to borrow Akira Vol 1 from the library but didn't. I had some time to kill before an appointment Friday afternoon so decided to sit and read some of it in the library.  The first 10 pages of strip were missing and someone had written 'ha ha fucker' on the 11th. Even without the vulgarity there was no way it was an accident because the title pages were intact.

I handed it to the assistant and picked up something else to read. 20 mins later as I'm leaving I see the assistant putting it back on the shelf.

Now the vandal deserves to be strung up by the balls, no question, but I have to confess, I was chuntering more about her as I left.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 04 October, 2009, 11:31:50 PM
I'm 33, and whilst not exactly a Mott uber-fan, it's an excuse for another ill-fated episode of Matt's Big Rock n' Roll Adventure and the first competition I've won in about a decade. Also, I've been to fewer gigs than I'd like lately. In fact I've missed a lot that I'd have ordinarily have bitten your hand off for due to procrastination this year.

Besides, they'll probably not survive long enough to do another tour, so strike while the iron's hot and all that...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 04 October, 2009, 11:44:08 PM
I gots Fields of the Nephilim next month and Rammstein in February. I may go and see my mate Tom's band (http://www.myspace.com/thetastymorsels) when they support some bunch of old geezers calling themselves the Animals* in December ... not my natural choice in music, but what they do, they do well.

Cheers!

Jim

* Not quite sure how that works ... Chas Chandler and Eric Burdon are dead, and I'm pretty sure Alan Price won't be playing. I'm reminded of the story about the axe that beheaded Charles I, which was on display at the Tower of London. "We've only had to replace the handle three times and the head twice," one of the guards is reputed to have said.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 04 October, 2009, 11:59:51 PM
I was bored in a library the other day so I got a JD book and drew cocks on the dark judges.

My sons guinea pig Lenny died yesterday, he was a little upset, for about a minute, but has decided he wants a black one. The worst thing was when I was cleaning him out I had him on the dustpan, eyes open staring peacefully, and in a squeaky voice said hello to my missus and she just pissed herself laughing, sick or what.

As I have been typing this, we have my bro in laws son round for a sleepover (see life is drokking fantastic thread) and he has just puked all over the airbed and now he is in bed with the wife and I am stuck down here sleeping on the sofa, just cleaned up the puke, bastard.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 05 October, 2009, 12:38:14 PM
That Garage bill I thought was for £250 is actually TWO Garage bills totalling £500.

Fortunately I've just worked a shed load of overtime to pay for it but I was planning on spending some of the well-earned cash to start my Tooth Subscription again and buy House of The Dead Overkill. Guess that's off the cards then...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 05 October, 2009, 03:24:16 PM
I've spent most of my meagre income for ages on keeping me and my mum in food and other consumables.  Now she's died all the money that has been piling up in HER account that I'm due a half of, is now off-limits until the will is done.  And the funeral is going to be HUGELY expensive.  My brother's taking out a loan to cover it and I'll pay my half when I get the cash. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 05 October, 2009, 05:09:21 PM
Missed my train due to the taxi driver taking the scenic route in an attempt to screw a few extra shekels out of me. Virgin wanted an extra 65 quid for a seat on the next train (on top of the 28 I'd already paid). Fuck it. I'm back at home lamenting the loss of about 90 quid already paid out for train tickets and a hotel room. And the gig, obviously.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 October, 2009, 06:14:32 PM
Damn!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 05 October, 2009, 07:18:05 PM
Damn indeed. Still, I'm just about over my sulk now. The living room's now more or less tidy, I've got a pan of home-made chicken soup bubbling away on the hob and I'm preparing to spend a couple of hours wreaking my vengeance in Black & White, so it's not quite as bleak as I'd initially thought.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 October, 2009, 08:46:08 PM
QuoteAnd the funeral is going to be HUGELY expensive.  My brother's taking out a loan to cover it and I'll pay my half when I get the cash.

That's what you get for not listening to June Whitfield!  :-*

I don't envy you Mike (in so many ways).  I remember trying to organise my Uncle's funeral a few years back and being simply horrified by the cost, with similar problems of finance.  Is there no way of talking to the solicitor prior to sorting of the will about freeing advance money up?  You (as carer) are probably executor, so you should have some say.  INAL, and I don't know how things work in your jurisdiction, so you're probably should ignore the unsolicited (boom-boom) advice.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 October, 2009, 09:10:15 PM
I haven't had the heating on since March, and I took a radiator off while I was doing the decorating. The boiler is still heating water to the taps, but my central heating won't come on, even though I've turned up the barometric pressure.

Despite having taken payment for September, my window cleaner has twice come round asking for payment for August. I don't remember not paying the window cleaner in August, but the window cleaner has no record of our having paid either. Half of me thinks they should have been a bit quicker about chasing up overdue payments in August, and the other half thinks maybe I can't afford to have the windows cleaned any more. The windows at the back haven't been cleaned in 6 years and I can still see through them, so maybe  don't need the front windows cleaned either. And I do have a long ladder.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 05 October, 2009, 09:21:43 PM
Unsolicited.  Most amusing!

I think we'll be ok, ta TordelBack.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 October, 2009, 09:31:26 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 05 October, 2009, 09:10:15 PM
I took a radiator off while I was doing the decorating.

I don't think my heating's going to come on again until I put that radiator back on. The flow pipe apparently terminates at the last radiator on the circuit, and that's where the return pipe starts from. I knew that. I had to try it out. That was easier than fiddling about putting the radiator back on only to have to take it off again when I do the wallpapering. Oh well. I'll put it back on after Two and a Half Men. Or just go to bed and leave it until the morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 October, 2009, 09:46:49 PM
QuoteI'll put it back on after Two and a Half Men.

No wonder you're battling the black dog, Ush!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 October, 2009, 09:51:24 PM
Ha! I'll have you know, Two and a Half Men offers just the right level of complexity I can cope with of an evening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 06 October, 2009, 12:06:22 AM
Does Chuck Lorre still do his vanity cards? I often found myself laughing at them more than the shows.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 12:50:21 AM
Just as I entered the chip shop the last piece of chicken was being served to another customer so I settled on cod as I didn't bring a book and I was not prepared to wait for chicken.

Admittedly this was my own fault as I went to the co-op first and spent ages trying to pick a desert. I settled on a coconut sponge which was on offer at 60 pence but it came up on the till as 96 pence as it is only the beginning of the current phase of offers. I still got it for 60 after I explained my case.

Also in the co-op I purchased a croissant from the reductions basket for 15 pence but it turned out to be an almond croissant. Had I chosen to heat it up once I arrived home I would have been gravely disappointed as the almond filling meant that the croissant considered as a single entity was most assuredly not conducive to having butter spread on it.

As I walked home, I observed that some thoughtless individual who had also opted to purchase reduced co-op bakery treats had dumped the plastic bag over somebody's [ultimately inadequate] fence and into their front garden, leaving a paragon of civic virtue such as myself to reach it over and pick it up for correct disposal.

I should also point out that my mood has been tainted with a somewhat melancholy disposition this week having watched the most recent episode of Element Hunters last night where a thoroughly likable character was apparently heartlessly murdered by her employers as a consequence of her inquisitive nature leading to her uncovering the unsavory aspects of the enterprise of fighting giant monsters created by the transferral of posi-elements into the Nega Earth which can only be perceived by pre-pubescent children.

I've got some pen on my jumper.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 06 October, 2009, 07:52:11 AM
Quoteturned out to be an almond croissant

But almond croissant are the food of the gods! They form a most delicious and fulfilling closure to any meal I find.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 06 October, 2009, 08:41:08 AM
Quote from: Bouwel on 06 October, 2009, 07:52:11 AM
Quoteturned out to be an almond croissant

But almond croissant are the food of the gods! They form a most delicious and fulfilling closure to any meal I find.

-Bouwel-

Hear hear! (Here here??) (Here hare here?) Almond croissants are indeed a positive luxury. And in the bargain section? That's life dealing you an ace, Roger!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 06 October, 2009, 09:18:38 AM
Remember the nutbag psycho boarder who was hassling my wife with accusations about me? Well, tHeY'Re BacK...

And we don't give a toss. So, if you're reading this, nutbag psycho boarder... DELETE.  :D

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 October, 2009, 11:09:33 AM
Two job interview rejections in one morning. Glad to have got it over with quickly. One more shot at getting my career back this autumn, or else resign myself to adding £3,000 p.a. to my debts for the rest of my days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 October, 2009, 01:54:02 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 06 October, 2009, 09:18:38 AMRemember the nutbag psycho boarder who was hassling my wife with accusations about me? Well, tHeY'Re BacK...

And we don't give a toss. So, if you're reading this, nutbag psycho boarder... DELETE.  :D
Oh, eff them!

Steev and Hot Wife, I know what that's like and I sincerely hope this person disappears into a big pit full of crocodiles and lemon juice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 05:10:31 PM
KFC or Burger King this evening? Which to choose?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 October, 2009, 05:19:56 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 05:10:31 PM
KFC or Burger King this evening? Which to choose?
Home cooking, you can't beat it. Especially when someone else cooks it in your home!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 October, 2009, 05:47:43 PM
Burger King would be my choice.

They sell Aberdeen Angus beef which means you have some idea what you are eating and where it comes from.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 06 October, 2009, 06:18:39 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 05:10:31 PM
KFC or Burger King this evening? Which to choose?

Given a choice I'd go with BK as well.

I got so shit-faced on Saturday after watching Horsham F.C get resoundingly kicked in the arse, all over the pitch, all afternoon, that I actually tried to eat a McChicken sandwich. Decided to stick with the beer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 October, 2009, 06:23:51 PM
Reading this, I'm amazed Devon's Daddy hasn't branched out into a Squaxx-specific home-delivery service, bringing actual food to the nerdy needy.   Oh wait, I forgot, he's busy choosing soft-furnishings for the maid's wing.  :-*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 07:04:51 PM
I went to the chip shop instead. I got two pieces of chicken, chips and a can of Cherry Coke for £3.70.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 October, 2009, 07:11:06 PM
You got all that advice and you went to the chippie instead ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 October, 2009, 08:15:50 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 05:10:31 PM
KFC or Burger King this evening? Which to choose?
KFC every time. It's a well known fact that one of the Colonel's special herbs and spices is crack cocaine and meat gnawed from the bone as nature intended always tastes better (c.f. spare ribs.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 October, 2009, 08:18:21 PM
I'll have you know that all my ribs are taken and I have none spare Cosh ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 October, 2009, 09:14:19 PM
QuoteI'll have you know that all my ribs are taken and I have none spare Cosh

Cannibalism already.  That's going to be some Helltrek.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 October, 2009, 09:25:37 PM
Back in the day when I suffered from the horrible vice known as SMOKING (yuk) I was once asked at a bus station if I had a "spare" cigarette.

"No.  I intend to smoke each and every one.  I'm an addict you see.  Should my addiction carry me off prematurely then I have decreed that there will be a pyramid built and my sarcophagus laid upon a bed of B&H silver, that I may smoke in the underworld"

How the bloke managed not to deck me still eludes me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 October, 2009, 09:28:22 PM
That'll be an expensive funeral then, what are they £6 a pack or something!
I remember when I was a paperboy, the newsagents sold loosies to all the kids. Those were the days ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 October, 2009, 10:11:35 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2009, 07:04:51 PM
I went to the chip shop instead. I got two pieces of chicken, chips and a can of Cherry Coke for £3.70.

I couldn't eat all that. When I go to the chip shop I come back with two portions of chips for myself and my lady non-wife. A big helping of deep-fried starch is enough of a lazy meal for me without adding protein into the equation. I do like it accompanied by a glass of Dr Pepper though, or a cider, or a Devon gin (cider + 1 gin + 1/2 cointreau).

My mum used to send me to the newsagent on an errand to buy cigarettes for her. How I used to hate that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 October, 2009, 10:56:06 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 06 October, 2009, 10:11:35 PM
My mum used to send me to the newsagent on an errand to buy cigarettes for her. How I used to hate that.

heh, me and the girl next door used to pretend my mum had sent us for fags, even thought she was a non smoker. We'd get 10 embassy No.6 and 'smoke' them in the fields behind our street. No inhaling though - we were only 10 and didn't understand that bit!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 October, 2009, 11:00:05 PM
I was sent on the fag run too.  Something that just wouldn't happen these days for all kinds of good and sensible reasons.  I'm sure the smell of my dad's pipe tobacco tins on the way home was a key motivator in my succumbing to the evil fags.  Can't quite think how I got the horrible smell of the stuff BURNING out of my head though. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 October, 2009, 11:08:17 PM
Today I learned that the SMART projection white boards in my classrooms are not going to be connected to the Internet, despite having Windows Explorer installed on the computer. Apparently because the cost of wiring in an Internet connection is too great.

So my students will just have to imagine the internet images, websites and Youtube clips mentioned in class, or look them up on their own computers when they get home. The only advantage to installing the expensive equipment, therefore, is saving on dry-wipe marker pens and not having to fiddle about setting up a projector.

::)

I am NOT doing this job next year even if I have to work in a supermarket instead. I'll go back on nights if I have to!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 October, 2009, 12:18:38 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 06 October, 2009, 10:11:35 PM
My mum used to send me to the newsagent on an errand to buy cigarettes for her. How I used to hate that.
It's my parents smoking that's made me such a virulent, proselytising non-smoker. It's not a new thing for me. By the age of ten, I'd refuse to buy my mum's fags. When sent to the shop for messages I'd get everything else I was asked to but invariably come back without the fags. How she used to hate that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 October, 2009, 12:38:01 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 07 October, 2009, 12:18:38 AM
It's my parents smoking that's made me such a virulent, proselytising non-smoker.

Weird - neither of my parents ever smoked, but me and both my brothers did. After my primary-school experimenting (see above), I only started smoking properly at uni, and continued for 20 years. It's now three and a half years since I quit, and I don't  miss them at all.

....until we all started talking about them, now I could murder one!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 October, 2009, 12:44:30 AM
My Mam smoked like a trooper (perhaps that's why she's had numerous strokes) and my Dad smoked occasionaly when I was young.
I remember sitting on the settee and my Mam sitting in the arm chair and watching as the smoke travelled across the room towards my young fit lungs. I have never smoked and never wanted to (if anything I'd just think of the monetary waste, even at that age).
I must admit I don't mind the smell of pipe smoke, weird or what!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 07 October, 2009, 12:50:49 AM
When I was a kid in the seventies every single adult I knew, without exception, smoked. It was just normal. Like in Life on Mars, every indoor space that wasn't school (except the reaking, stale-fags-smelling staff room) which I knew as a child was filled with a choking fog of smoke. At my grandmother's house at the weekend there were often four adults in the same room puffing away.

Cigarettes held no mystique or allure for me and I never acquired the habit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 07 October, 2009, 01:28:23 AM
Interesting to see peoples experiences regarding smoking.

Both my parents smoked but never drank, which probably explains why I drink but don't smoke.

My mother even smoked whilst carrying my sister and myself. Both of us apparently kicked her until she stopped.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 October, 2009, 04:28:08 AM
I've just been looking at some of the forum members stats and I can't believe that some of you don't even post in the wee hours. What's up with you, yes you know who you are, with your 01:00 to 07:00 I won't post on the site, as I'm in bed rubbish, come on this is a 24 hour forum you know!





Bollocks, I'm off to bed then ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 October, 2009, 08:43:55 AM
The lad in WH Smiths who knows not to bother trying to flog me a special offer Galaxy or bag of Haribo seems to have disappeared so every morning I have to fix someone new with my Look of Withering Disdain (tm)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 October, 2009, 09:42:41 AM
No one has voted in the Short Story Comp yet. Whasupwitdat?

http://2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,26439.15/topicseen.html
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 07 October, 2009, 07:50:59 PM
As a 5 year old I used to get 20 B&H for my day. Oh how times have changed. His hacking and spluttering put me off ciggies for life. My dads final years would have been a great advert for a non smoking campain. He was once mistaken for my gran's husband. He was 55 at the time and she was about 75.











V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 08 October, 2009, 12:48:55 PM
I found out yesterday that my three year old nephew is really getting into art and his favourite character at the moment is Spiderman. So when sis asked me to draw him a picture for his wall, I thought 'No problem' (Passing the mantle down the generations and all that)

So, suitable heroic pose, webs a-slingin', proportions vaguely correct and now all I need is....

...Could I remember how his costume looked? Could I? Or even the chest emblem? Sure I knew there were varying degrees of blue and red but that was it. To my eternal shame, I had to google image search spiderman on my phone somewhat discreetly and then realised I'd got the eyes wrong too.

Well I was always going to submit work to DC anyway...  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 08 October, 2009, 01:40:21 PM
forgetting spidey?? "you have forgotten the face of your father!" :-/ sbt
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 08 October, 2009, 01:45:41 PM
 :-[

Bad, isn't it? Still If I can't share these things with anonymous folk in the ether, then who can I share it with?

And now I have Suzanne Vega stuck in my head again. Not exactly an impediment, but stuck, nonetheless.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 October, 2009, 02:04:13 PM
QuoteCould I remember how his costume looked? Could I? Or even the chest emblem? Sure I knew there were varying degrees of blue and red but that was it.

Wow, say what you like about Mephisto, but when makes a deal, he really follows through on his part.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 08 October, 2009, 05:27:40 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 08 October, 2009, 01:45:41 PM

And now I have Suzanne Vega stuck in my head again. Not exactly an impediment, but stuck, nonetheless.

Nowt wrong with a bit of Vega I actually use a couple of her songs when I'm trying to dislodge an annoying song from my head.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2009, 06:04:02 PM
Lost my keys the other day. Retraced my steps in the pissing rain and rang work but no luck. Had to shelter in the pub (watching Emmerdale & Eastenders at full volume *shudder*)till my flatmate got home at 8 o'clock. I have a spare door key but it'll take a week to get a new electric fob for the front door, and so I'm just annoying each of my neighbours in turn by making them buzz me in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 October, 2009, 06:53:18 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2009, 06:04:02 PM
Lost my keys the other day. Retraced my steps in the pissing rain and rang work but no luck. Had to shelter in the pub (watching Emmerdale & Eastenders at full volume *shudder*)till my flatmate got home at 8 o'clock. I have a spare door key but it'll take a week to get a new electric fob for the front door, and so I'm just annoying each of my neighbours in turn by making them buzz me in.

Sounds like a nightmare.

I hate television in pubs.If a pub has a TV in it then i wont drink in it.Its always an indication of a shite drinking establishment.

What kind of emptyheads need to watch TV in a pub ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 October, 2009, 06:55:58 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 October, 2009, 06:53:18 PM
What kind of emptyheads need to watch TV in a pub ?

An alcoholic who can't afford a tv!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 October, 2009, 08:57:10 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 October, 2009, 06:55:58 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 October, 2009, 06:53:18 PM
What kind of emptyheads need to watch TV in a pub ?

An alcoholic who can't afford a tv!

An emptyheaded alcoholic who cant afford a TV !

I have the exact same policy with pubs that have bouncers on the door.You know a pub attracts shitheads if it has bouncers on the door.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 08 October, 2009, 09:20:25 PM
Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 08 October, 2009, 05:27:40 PM
Nowt wrong with a bit of Vega I actually use a couple of her songs when I'm trying to dislodge an annoying song from my head.

What do you use when you want to dislodge Blood Makes Noise?  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 October, 2009, 11:16:06 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 08 October, 2009, 09:20:25 PM
Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 08 October, 2009, 05:27:40 PM
Nowt wrong with a bit of Vega I actually use a couple of her songs when I'm trying to dislodge an annoying song from my head.

What do you use when you want to dislodge Blood Makes Noise?  :D

ECT.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 October, 2009, 12:28:12 AM
My bedroom is in the attic and I regularly have to contend with my sister leaving plates  on the banister for me to knock off as I come downstairs. She excelled herself tonight by leaving 2 di plates (one of which still had TWO THIRDS OF HER FUCKING DINNER WHICH SHE WAS TOO PICKY TO EAT ON IT) and a bowl. She dumped them on top of clean clothes as well.

Also I was going to buy some Led Zeppelin CDs from the HMV sale but my ridiculous buyer's remorse forbade me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 09 October, 2009, 02:02:15 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 October, 2009, 11:16:06 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 08 October, 2009, 09:20:25 PM
What do you use when you want to dislodge Blood Makes Noise?  :D

ECT.

Oh, well played, Sir!  8)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 09 October, 2009, 05:09:14 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 09 October, 2009, 12:28:12 AM
Also I was going to buy some Led Zeppelin CDs from the HMV sale but my ridiculous buyer's remorse forbade me.

You should already own them. Go back to your room.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 October, 2009, 06:12:48 PM
Friday is Fish & Chips day in our household. Now in the winter months it always seems to rain when I go to get them. Today was no exception. I got pissed wet through (bottom half only, Gortex is a wonderful thing) but still, the food was lovely.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 October, 2009, 12:19:10 AM
Mother has been on the sherry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 October, 2009, 01:16:05 AM
 I am bored shitless with The Godfather on PS2.

I think i will sell it because its just tedious and boring and its winding me up badly which defeats the object of something thats supposed to be enjoyable.

I find that quite often gaming is a waste of time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 October, 2009, 03:41:00 AM
One of my neighbours is an old woman who is completely bonkers and totally unreasonable and because of this its impossible to deal with her and get her to contribute to the costs of cleaning down /patch plastering and repainting the walls in the outside yard where the car parking spaces are and repainting the iron gates.

I dont get on with her and no one else wants to deal with her either but luckily i hardly ever come into contact with her.

Theres always one...........
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 October, 2009, 10:41:29 AM
Was busy playing Scribblenauts and burnt my tea.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 October, 2009, 11:36:56 AM
Speeding fine. My first ever.  :-X

Motorway. Sliproad. Roadworks. Temporary speed restriction. Late at night. Totally empty road. (Your Honour).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 10 October, 2009, 04:19:07 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 October, 2009, 11:36:56 AM
Speeding fine. My first ever.  :-X

Motorway. Sliproad. Roadworks. Temporary speed restriction. Late at night. Totally empty road. (Your Honour).
Is that part of the glorious new M4 parking system?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 October, 2009, 06:02:05 PM
Quote from: James S on 10 October, 2009, 04:19:07 PM
Is that part of the glorious new M4 parking system?

The very same. Every night I'm faced with a dilemma of how to return to Cardiff from Newport. If I finish work at 9pm, I take the M4 as my most direct route home. Any day I leave work at 5.30pm I know there's no point venturing onto the M4 as it'll be standstill at some point. In fact the traffic's so bad, even going into Cardiff via Newport Road, that there's not much point leaving at 5.30pm anyway, so I generally stick around until nearer 7pm and deal with admin and photocopying in advance for the week ahead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 October, 2009, 09:56:18 PM
Tonight, just as me and the good lady were about to sit down and watch some recorded stuff I managed to walk into the front room with about 3/4 of a pint of pop and proceed to throw it all over the floor. Thank God we have tiled floors.
Amazingly my wife saw the funny side of it all as I just couldn't believe what I'd just done.

I love my wife :-*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 October, 2009, 10:21:47 PM
A dodgy aggressive looking geezer just tried to stare me out in the shop but he looked away after only 3 seconds.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 October, 2009, 10:29:04 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 11 October, 2009, 10:21:47 PM
A dodgy aggressive looking geezer just tried to stare me out in the shop but he looked away after only 3 seconds.
Peter "Laser Gaze" Wolf!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 October, 2009, 10:31:17 PM
3 seconds Pete, he'll never win one of those staring contests in Mega City 1 ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 October, 2009, 12:47:39 AM
I didnt particularly enjoy that visit to the shop as there were quite a few dodgy types and weirdos hanging around.

I usually ignore or blank them because i have no interest in people who are out to prove something.I just find it boring and its not usually a problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 October, 2009, 12:54:41 AM
What type of shop is this Pete?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 October, 2009, 01:37:34 AM
Co-Op.Nothing exciting really.

There was a bunch of dodgy looking East Europeans riding around on bikes with no lights  .They were also rifling through bags of donations left in the doorway of the charity shop across the road.

The guy who was staring in the shop had this odd walk that was like what you call the A Wing Shuffle which is like a swagger.He also had these kind of dead looking eyes or dead expression.I just didnt like his look and he just got my back up instantly.I have seen these types lots of times before as well so its nothing new and i dont really know why i commented on it .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 October, 2009, 08:51:58 PM
Pete, he probably had some mental issues, you never know.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 13 October, 2009, 08:06:43 PM
Popped into a remaindered bookshop today and found SHITLOADS of Rebellion/ DC 2000AD collections for £2.99 to £4.99. Had a little panic attack, as one does, and worked out I could only afford three of them. Spent twenty minutes umming and arring and generally being rubbish, then went for Fiends Of The Eastern Front hardback, Carver Hale hardback and Durham Red: The Vermin Stars.

However, on return to my module, I was dissappointed to find that I already had the Durham Red volume in an earlier, bigger printing that has flaps,and it was volume one that I needed.

I now have an extra Vermin Stars, should anyone wish to swop.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 October, 2009, 10:05:36 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 12 October, 2009, 08:51:58 PM
Pete, he probably had some mental issues, you never know.







V

I wouldnt be at all surprised .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 October, 2009, 10:30:27 PM
Durham Red's flaps. Heh heh heh.

I believe this is an excellent use of my 9,992nd post, as I count down to vanishing at 10,000.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 October, 2009, 11:33:35 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 13 October, 2009, 08:06:43 PM
Popped into a remaindered bookshop today and found SHITLOADS of Rebellion/ DC 2000AD collections for £2.99 to £4.99. Had a little panic attack, as one does, and worked out I could only afford three of them. Spent twenty minutes umming and arring and generally being rubbish, then went for Fiends Of The Eastern Front hardback, Carver Hale hardback and Durham Red: The Vermin Stars.

However, on return to my module, I was dissappointed to find that I already had the Durham Red volume in an earlier, bigger printing that has flaps,and it was volume one that I needed.

I now have an extra Vermin Stars, should anyone wish to swop.
I did something similar (except with drunken amnesiac online clicking) and now have two copies of Robohunter: Verdus I'd swap unless you've already got / don't want that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 14 October, 2009, 12:41:50 AM
I was on my way to the cinema earlier tonight, walking down a poorly lit street, with headphones in and in another world completely. All of a sudden a young chap with a hood over head, came running out of an adjacent field and jumped over the wall. I first took note of him as he jumped out straight in front of me, this not only made me jump back, but it also scared the living shite out of me. While I'm not normally one for judging people by stereotypes, when i did look at him and turned off my music off, I expected him to demand my cash and whatever else was in my pockets. But instead he just laughed, apologised and shook my hand, then continued running on up the street. Well I guess that showed me.

Ah well! Its nearly Halloween, everyone's entitled to one good scare.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 14 October, 2009, 07:05:31 AM
MARCOM
the dept from hell.
have decided my intentions for the New year countdown are not enkeeping with image of a marina club.
we should not in their consideratoin be throwing a party.with a band, DJ dancing and enjoyment for all, but should consider a gentle affair with a jazz singer :-\.

its new years for goodness sake.
::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 October, 2009, 07:27:03 AM
They're twatbags! I bet the party you'd like to throw would be talked about for years and would guarantee repeat custom every December 31st.

As if the kind of people who can afford to order up lobster and champagne delivered to their bloody boat in the middle of the night want to see the New Year in quietly.
::)
Given a choice of paying through the nose for extravagant or pretentious, I'd take extravagant every time!
:D
Title: The same subject you see elsewhere no the thread - blame my stupid phone
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 October, 2009, 09:23:28 AM
Nobody should be subjected to jazz without their prior express written permission in triplicate. It is a broad genre and one that divides folks neatly into love/hate camps. Personally i like some jazz but, like metal and hip hop, it's not for everyone. Can't quite understand this move except from pretentious motives. My sympathies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 October, 2009, 09:32:20 AM
They're trying to be upmarket rather than fun or good value.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 14 October, 2009, 12:17:37 PM
Josh Rouse has a new EP out, but it's only available as a download.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 14 October, 2009, 01:34:55 PM
I get really wound up when people, despite having no interest in jazz (or might own just one jazz album at most – usually a compilation album) include jazz as one of their interests on their CV. I think they hope it is making them look cool and sophisticated. I did ask a friend once what jazz he likes after just having seen his CV and he had no answer. And I recently saw a relative's message on some dating website (I was being nosey) and she includes jazz when I know for a fact she has no interest in it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 October, 2009, 03:58:39 PM
The moronic bus driver slammed the doors on me as I attempted to exit.  Sticking me between them.  First I, and then otehr passengers, attempted to call out and bring his attention to the fact I was stuck.  He then closed it properly and continued to ignore me. 

My ringing the bell was the only reason he stopped in the first place.  He then decided to tell me, loudly, that rushing the closing door was dangerous.  He'd only had it open for about the time it took to step forward into it's concertinaing maw. 

I called him a dog-funsterer.  Loudly.  But only AFTER he'd let me the EFF off his device of doom.  Git.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 October, 2009, 04:12:56 PM
I find the 16th century legal system very confusing. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 14 October, 2009, 04:35:10 PM
I just read a chapter about 17th Century changes in policy and law relating to piracy. 1 century later when dealing with something as exciting as Pirates they still couldn't make it engaging!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 October, 2009, 05:11:41 PM
Just popped to the corner shop to get some mushrooms, the nearest shop was shut, don't know why. I then had to back track past the house to the other one, only to find them with stickers on that said 'display until the 10th'. Jesus Christ is it any wonder people go to the supermarkets, plus they were all sweaty.

The worst bit is I don't eat them, I went out of love for my wife.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 14 October, 2009, 06:21:18 PM
I have left my new comic of Star Wars Invasion -at work. Who knows what will happen to it.and my copy of Walking Dead a comic i've yet to read a single issue of. And my umbrella.

The police were hovering over Harrow in a copter. is there some mystic, illuminati style connection. I think so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 14 October, 2009, 06:50:39 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 14 October, 2009, 01:34:55 PM
I get really wound up when people, despite having no interest in jazz (or might own just one jazz album at most – usually a compilation album) include jazz as one of their interests on their CV. I think they hope it is making them look cool and sophisticated. I did ask a friend once what jazz he likes after just having seen his CV and he had no answer. And I recently saw a relative's message on some dating website (I was being nosey) and she includes jazz when I know for a fact she has no interest in it.
I think you have misunderstood what a chap means when he describe "Jazz" as an interest. Next time, try asking what his favourite periodicals are.

Actually, I've never encountered anyone who would describe jazz as an interest. If I did, I would refuse to employ them on general principle. The principle being that I abhor jazz music.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 October, 2009, 08:04:48 PM
I dont see what relevence what your musical tastes are when applying for a job.WTF has it got to do with anything ?

Why do employers need to know what school you went to or what your interests are ?

I quite like Jazz but i dont have any in my collection as its an area of music i havent really explored.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 October, 2009, 08:08:07 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 14 October, 2009, 06:50:39 PM
Actually, I've never encountered anyone who would describe jazz as an interest. If I did, I would refuse to employ them on general principle. The principle being that I abhor jazz music.

I just don't get all this angry, violent hate for jazz. You're so violent in your angry hate for jazz that I'm off, you bitchy negative jazz-hating middle-aged man!




No, I jest.

I don't like jazz very much either. But my wife does, so I'm often forced to listen to it, or to go places where it happens. Most of the time it's perfectly listenable in a sort of muzack sense, but leaves me neither moved nor changed in any way. It seems to exist solely so that old men with ugly instruments have something to do. And so that young men can affect being "strangely distanced from their surroundings, but in a cool, not mental, way".

All that said, Van Morrison is a Living God and I had one of the very best nights of my life on a "jazz cruise" on Lake Windermere last year.

And I like jazz mags.

SBT

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 October, 2009, 08:32:32 PM
Zarjazzer,

You're in Harrow?  The borough, nay, the town of my birth.  I'm in Stanmore personally.  Ah, the youngest and BEST Borough of London I think.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 15 October, 2009, 01:37:09 AM
I was walking downhill a couple of days ago with a decent tune stuck in my mind but this was all ruined by some boy racer inching along in traffic beside me with his crap 'music' blaring out of his heap of shit they call a car. Sal from 'Do the right thing came to mind': "No rap, no music, no music, no music." (It wasn't rap but that quote still came to mind.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 October, 2009, 01:50:44 AM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 15 October, 2009, 01:37:09 AM
I was walking downhill a couple of days ago with a decent tune stuck in my mind but this was all ruined by some boy racer inching along in traffic beside me with his crap 'music' blaring out of his heap of shit they call a car. Sal from 'Do the right thing came to mind': "No rap, no music, no music, no music." (It wasn't rap but that quote still came to mind.)

SMIC

[Shit Music In Cars]

Thats what i always call it.

I think i heard someone playing Propaganda [80s German ZTT band if anyone doesnt know] and i was amazed because otherwise i have never heard anything any good when its played loud through a car hi-fi .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 October, 2009, 09:06:31 AM
Oh, I love Propaganda! Great fun. There's my driving music for next week sorted. Today I will be mostly listening to Depeche Mode. Construction Time Again on the way there, Songs of Faith and Devotion on the way back.

Anyway, procession of minor impediments...

Yesterday I worked 20 hours straight through, 07.00 to 03.00, and today I started work at 08.30 and likely won't finish until 19.00; so that's 10 and a half hours. Pay-wise it works out about £9.34 an hour. The trouble is, I can't increase my earnings by working longer hours. Staying up all night to get it done just reduces the hourly rate. The financial incentives to do a good job are not great to nonexistent: it's the pride I take in my work that stops me doing a half-arsed job.

But it's only a minor impediment. Life's pretty good generally, and my mood hasn't been so up in a long while.

9/10  ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 October, 2009, 05:28:01 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 15 October, 2009, 09:06:31 AM
Oh, I love Propaganda! Great fun. There's my driving music for next week sorted. Today I will be mostly listening to Depeche Mode. Construction Time Again on the way there, Songs of Faith and Devotion on the way back.

Anyway, procession of minor impediments...

Yesterday I worked 20 hours straight through, 07.00 to 03.00, and today I started work at 08.30 and likely won't finish until 19.00; so that's 10 and a half hours. Pay-wise it works out about £9.34 an hour. The trouble is, I can't increase my earnings by working longer hours. Staying up all night to get it done just reduces the hourly rate. The financial incentives to do a good job are not great to nonexistent: it's the pride I take in my work that stops me doing a half-arsed job.

But it's only a minor impediment. Life's pretty good generally, and my mood hasn't been so up in a long while.

9/10  ;D

A Secret Wish an astonishingly good album.

Someone nicked my large onion that was part of the ingredients for tonights dinner.

GRrrrr......

I went into the sausage shop today and someone else got the last sausage roll and i growled at them .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 15 October, 2009, 06:07:45 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 14 October, 2009, 08:32:32 PM
Zarjazzer,

You're in Harrow?  The borough, nay, the town of my birth.  I'm in Stanmore personally.  Ah, the youngest and BEST Borough of London I think.....

I work in harrow today we ran up the hill as one of my chums is off on a trek up Kilimanjaro. Harrow hill don't quite compare but it's a start. and had a nice pint at The Castle. Very posh. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 06:16:17 PM
This just happened at the Forces house at about 17:15

The family had just sat down for tea (toad in the hole) and there was a knock at the door. I got up and went to answer, there was an old bloke there with one of those hand held gizmo's.

"Hello, I'm here to read the gas and electric".
"I do all that online mate," I replied.
"Well I'm here to read it anyway," he countered.
"I do it online and therefore I don't see the need for you to go down my cellar anymore to read those meters."
"So you are refusing entry?" he replied.
"Yes mate, I am, and you can also put down on that thing that you interrupted my evening meal with my family and that if EON send another bod round to ask to read my meters I'll switch to another user, even if it's more expensive, and NEVER come back. Did you manage to get all that mate? Off you go then," and then I closed the door.

I then sat back down with the family and the wife asked who was that, to which I replied "A TWAT!" I did tell her who it was straight after though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 06:17:54 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 15 October, 2009, 06:07:45 PM
one of my chums is off on a trek up Kilimanjaro.

Are there any people left in the country who haven't done this ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 October, 2009, 06:26:33 PM
Quote"I do all that online mate," I replied.

I don't get it, CF. These days I submit my leccy readings online too, but they still need to check it every now and again, to make sure I'm not telling porkies.  Please explain!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 06:44:09 PM
My worst one was when my standing order went from £60 a month for Gas & Electricity to £90ish (can't quite remember the exact figure). I rang them up and asked why and they said that they had projected that I would be using this amount in the coming year.
I told them that they can bloody well put it back to what it was because I use as little of each as is possible (the wife will vouch for this).
We argued on the phone about how much I use and I said, look back through my records and tell me, do I look as though I'm suddenly going to use half as much again, No, thought not. Put it back to £60 then.
They said that I may end up owing them at the end of the year and I said "I doubt it."
They replied by saying that if I owe them money I'd have to pay it all in a one'r. Let's just do that then and see what happens.
In the end they owed me money.

I am one of those people who will sit in a room with the windows open in mid winter in a pair iof shorts and not feel the cold. By the way I do let the wife have the heating on, in fact we put that back on yesterday.
I believe we should all save money by not wasting energy so that we can buy more Dredd items ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 15 October, 2009, 06:58:09 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 06:17:54 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 15 October, 2009, 06:07:45 PM
one of my chums is off on a trek up Kilimanjaro.

Are there any people left in the country who haven't done this ;)

it's for chari- dee! Great Ormond Street hospital.His local hospital told him his son would die and they shouldn't bother doing anything. Fortunately a visiting doc from Great Ormond proposed some treatment and it worked. Him and another colleague with a similiar story are going up next June. i suppose you could just hold a raffle... :), seriously tho,  good for them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 15 October, 2009, 07:47:06 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 15 October, 2009, 06:07:45 PM
I work in harrow today we ran up the hill as one of my chums is off on a trek up Kilimanjaro. Harrow hill don't quite compare but it's a start. and had a nice pint at The Castle. Very posh. :)
The Castle is my favourite pub that nobody's ever heard of.  Even for a (mostly) lifelong resident of this, the fairest of Boroughs, it seems to go unnoticed by many round here which is sort of a shame.  Although it does make finding a seat a hell of a lot easier. 

Quiet night out in Harrow - Castle.  Loud, fun, raucous night out - Trinity (with top notch bands and DJs upstairs too).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 October, 2009, 08:04:37 PM
I have to go to the bloody shop again because i forgot butter.I am already fed up with the idea of cooking Macaroni Cheese tonight but i dont have a choice because there is nothing else to eat.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 October, 2009, 08:05:44 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 15 October, 2009, 06:26:33 PM
Quote"I do all that online mate," I replied.
I don't get it, CF. These days I submit my leccy readings online too, but they still need to check it every now and again, to make sure I'm not telling porkies.  Please explain!
Yep. And with the gas meter they have a legal duty to check it for safety every year or two (vagueness due to length of time since I had to know this and NBAL) so you'll never find a company who never call to check.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 08:13:22 PM
How do they check it with a torch. As every other time I've let them in I've stood right next to them so they can't steal any Dredd stuff as I know that's what the buggers are looking at!
All they have ever done is shine the torch on the numbers, write them onto their gizmo (whilst saying the numbers aloud) and then move onto the other meter and repeat. What else are they doing, our meter is less than 5 years old and I can smell gas so what are they looking for. I bet it's just to see if you are wired up to the street lights (on the electric side) but I have no idea on the gas side, apart from said leaks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 October, 2009, 12:07:44 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 October, 2009, 05:28:01 PM
Someone nicked my large onion that was part of the ingredients for tonights dinner.

It's crime central where you live, Peter! Like something out of The Wire or... Hill Street Blues.  ;)

Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 06:17:54 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 15 October, 2009, 06:07:45 PM
one of my chums is off on a trek up Kilimanjaro.

Are there any people left in the country who haven't done this ;)

I will never, ever, ever in my whole lifetime do that or anything like it. No thanks. I would rather read a book. But not a boring one. I may go on another 3-day walk from my front door to somewhere else though. So I do have a spirit of adventure of sorts, as long as there are pubs and convenience stores every 10 miles or so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 October, 2009, 12:20:13 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 16 October, 2009, 12:07:44 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 October, 2009, 05:28:01 PM
Someone nicked my large onion that was part of the ingredients for tonights dinner.

It's crime central where you live, Peter! Like something out of The Wire or... Hill Street Blues.  ;)


It wasnt worth crying over it anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 October, 2009, 12:25:23 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 October, 2009, 06:44:09 PM
I don't see the need for you to go down my cellar anymore to read those meters.....

....I told them that they can bloody well put it back to what it was because I use as little of each as is possible (the wife will vouch for this).

What a lovely world it would be if all services and utilities worked on this basis - "What? Income tax - no, mate I don't owe any. Ask my mum" or "That was only about five gallons I put in, honest, my mate was watching me"  ;D

Only kidding - but this is why I'll drop everything to let them actually physically read the damn thing, otherwise they just make up numbers and then add a bit for luck. The problem is getting them to do this - once a year is about par for the course, the rest are guesstimations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 16 October, 2009, 03:51:38 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 16 October, 2009, 12:20:13 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 16 October, 2009, 12:07:44 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 October, 2009, 05:28:01 PM
Someone nicked my large onion that was part of the ingredients for tonights dinner.

It's crime central where you live, Peter! Like something out of The Wire or... Hill Street Blues.  ;)


It wasnt worth crying over it anyway.


Someone might have cried over it tonight...it is an onion after all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 October, 2009, 07:33:49 AM
QuoteI've stood right next to them so they can't steal any Dredd stuff as I know that's what the buggers are looking at!

Ahhhhh, I see.  Of course, I forgot that the meter'd be in that cellar, of story and fable.  Maybe you could point out the small admission fee?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 October, 2009, 10:07:42 AM
Someone in our office has to go due to cutbacks. Yesterday we all got an 'interview' about it, and this morning we've been sent a 'personal file' to fill in, which is actually a job application form. For the job I'm already doing...
Anyway, it's a great atmosphere in here at the moment! One of us will find out if we're the lucky one, if they give the required noticed to quit the job, just before Christmas.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 16 October, 2009, 10:23:59 AM
Ooh... and there was I about to moan about a leaking shower and angry downstairs neighbour. Not much in the way of consolation yer Lorship, but I've been in your shoes and it doesn't make for a room full of happy campers, even after the cutbacks have been made.

Sending you good luck vibes in a 'hope it all works out' sorta way from here...  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 October, 2009, 10:59:34 AM
That sounds like a right bag of hoots and titters, Your Lordship.  You have my sympathies. 

Cruel though it is to wish unhappiness and strife upon an un-named stranger, I hope it's not you mate.  And I simultaneously hope it's someone who won't be destroyed by the experience but use it positively.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 October, 2009, 11:14:44 AM
Cheers guys!

Yeah, it's a bit shite. What's annoying is that everyone in the office is a nice person. If only we had a bastard here, things would be so much easier!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 16 October, 2009, 11:36:55 AM
Yeah, there's never an E.B. Farnham in the room when you need someone to hate...

Big hugs Man.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 October, 2009, 11:43:55 AM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 16 October, 2009, 10:07:42 AM
Someone in our office has to go due to cutbacks. Yesterday we all got an 'interview' about it, and this morning we've been sent a 'personal file' to fill in, which is actually a job application form.

That's no minor impediment! That qualifies for a 'life spugs because...'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 October, 2009, 11:44:33 AM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 16 October, 2009, 11:36:55 AM
Yeah, there's never an E.B. Farnham in the room when you need someone to hate...

Big hugs Man.

Heh. Yer goddamned fucking right!
Thanks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 October, 2009, 11:46:00 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 16 October, 2009, 11:43:55 AM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 16 October, 2009, 10:07:42 AM
Someone in our office has to go due to cutbacks. Yesterday we all got an 'interview' about it, and this morning we've been sent a 'personal file' to fill in, which is actually a job application form.

That's no minor impediment! That qualifies for a 'life spugs because...'

Ahhh, see, I thought about putting it on that thread, but decided on this one because at the moment it's just pissing me off a bit. Now, if we get the the end of December and I find out I'm the 'lucky' one, I may have to upgrade it to 'life spugs'...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 October, 2009, 11:48:09 AM
That doesn't count as an "upgrade" your honour.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 October, 2009, 11:51:10 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 16 October, 2009, 11:48:09 AM
That doesn't count as an "upgrade" your honour.

Heh. Good point!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 October, 2009, 03:22:47 PM
A friend has had this re-applying for his job recently as well as there are going to be redundancies at some point.

My guess is he will go because he is an office full of small minded vindictive women who like to transfer their prejudices and boyfriend problems on the only male member of staff.

It sounds like its the latest thing  re-applying for jobs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 16 October, 2009, 03:32:01 PM
ooh that sounds shan Lord Rac, my sympathies, the day to day morale must be through the ...floor.

Still you've got pro-comic writer, con-organiser, publisher, editor in your back pocket  ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 October, 2009, 03:42:48 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 16 October, 2009, 03:32:01 PM
ooh that sounds shan Lord Rac, my sympathies, the day to day morale must be through the ...floor.

Still you've got pro-comic writer, con-organiser, publisher, editor in your back pocket  ;D

Indeed! All I need to do now is find a way to make that all pay money...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 October, 2009, 03:47:42 PM
Sympathies RAC, a situation I'm all too familiar with.  E.B. did have his uses.

And PW:

Quote... an office full of small minded vindictive women who like to transfer their prejudices and boyfriend problems...

The very definition of office work!  Our office was similarly infested a few years back (okay, a lot of years back), but happily after careful pruning we're down to one mild example, and bad apple principle aside, one simply isn't enough to generate bitchy horribleness.  I should point out that most of my current colleagues are women, and (with aforementioned exception) models of level-headed easy-going professionalism.  

However, there was a point when entering certain rooms at any time of day resulted in sudden silence and sullen, utterly miserable looks, and a general feeling that being male was the equivalent of being on the run from a war crimes tribunal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 October, 2009, 05:28:53 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 16 October, 2009, 03:47:42 PM
Sympathies RAC, a situation I'm all too familiar with.  E.B. did have his uses.

And PW:

Quote... an office full of small minded vindictive women who like to transfer their prejudices and boyfriend problems...

The very definition of office work!  Our office was similarly infested a few years back (okay, a lot of years back), but happily after careful pruning we're down to one mild example, and bad apple principle aside, one simply isn't enough to generate bitchy horribleness.  I should point out that most of my current colleagues are women, and (with aforementioned exception) models of level-headed easy-going professionalism.  

However, there was a point when entering certain rooms at any time of day resulted in sudden silence and sullen, utterly miserable looks, and a general feeling that being male was the equivalent of being on the run from a war crimes tribunal.


Imagine yourself working in an office and the boss keeps saying over and over again "All men are shits" followed by "Oh sorry Gary - No offence !".This is what happens on a daily basis.

Personally i wouldnt tolerate that for very long and the way i see it is its highly unprofessional to bring ones own personal baggage and prejudices into the workplace like that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 October, 2009, 07:13:16 PM
I let my son, Sam watch youtube through my page as he likes to trawl through all sorts of crap. The problem is all the stuff he favourites, it's embarrassing for me as anyone who finds my Dredd stuff will see that 'I' like the following-

Coronation Street Theme Tune 2008
Fireman Sam Theme Song - NEW
Chain Letters 1997 Part 3/3
say goodbye to teletubbies (with chinese subtitles)
etc.....

Autism is a wonderful thing ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 16 October, 2009, 09:48:49 PM
I stood in front of the 2000ad section in Forbidden Planet today with not a penny piece to my name.

All those beckoning temptresses, lined up on the shelves before me, with their shiny covers, promising unbridled joy within.

Others came, selected, and walked away with joyous expressions, whilst laughing at my pauper's gaze.

It's not fair, I tell you  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 October, 2009, 08:07:46 AM
Today I am going to waste my money on buying a complete set of crockery for the missus.
We have the good set in the dining room, for special occasions, as you do! We also have the every day set, which has a few chips here and there and a few missing but there are only three of us, so who cares I say!
Sadly with my Dredd spenditure this month I have lost the argument :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 October, 2009, 10:43:20 AM
And every meal you eat from that crockery will contain a reminder of that money "wasted" at the bottom, beneath the gravy.  The ceramic laughter of the percelain gods rings in your ears like a modern day Orpheus and you suspect you're being taken for a ride.....

Horrid.  Been there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 October, 2009, 01:21:37 PM
I wish the idiot that keeps listing their comics in the original comic art section of Ebay would just stop .

It means going through 20 pages of items that shouldnt even be there and its annoying.I just sent the seller an Email asking them to stop doing it.

GGGRRrr...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 17 October, 2009, 02:04:06 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 October, 2009, 01:21:37 PM
I wish the idiot that keeps listing their comics in the original comic art section of Ebay would just stop .

It means going through 20 pages of items that shouldnt even be there and its annoying.I just sent the seller an Email asking them to stop doing it.

GGGRRrr...

With you on this one. Is it just one seller though? There always seems to be loads of stuff only about 20% of the lots ever seem to actually be art and not comics, or posters etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 October, 2009, 02:48:49 PM
Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 17 October, 2009, 02:04:06 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 October, 2009, 01:21:37 PM
I wish the idiot that keeps listing their comics in the original comic art section of Ebay would just stop .

It means going through 20 pages of items that shouldnt even be there and its annoying.I just sent the seller an Email asking them to stop doing it.

GGGRRrr...

With you on this one. Is it just one seller though? There always seems to be loads of stuff only about 20% of the lots ever seem to actually be art and not comics, or posters etc.

Its predominantly a seller called APA234 which must be an acronym for A Pain inthe Arse 234.

There are others as well but i dont see what the problem is with listing items in the correct category.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 October, 2009, 03:16:20 PM
Thank God that's over with.
We had to buy 2 sets of 4 plates, 4 side plates, 4 bowls & 4 cups as we wanted 6 of each only but this was the cheapest way to do it. We don't need the cups but it was still cheaper this way.

I know it's amazing, if we bought 6 of each individually it would be a lot more expensive and you don't get any packaging, how's that happen!

Ah well, it's over with for a few years now.
One good thing though, we're having Chinese tonight and when we finish the meal we will just throw out our old plates. How decadent ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 October, 2009, 06:55:36 PM
Ah, a hidden benefit I'd not thought of.  Nice one.  Enjoy the Chinese - I'm eating BAD microwave food (because I'm lazy and not actually that hungry) whilst watching Come Dine with Me (which I started to watch in the hope it'd give me an appetite).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 October, 2009, 07:19:14 PM
I'm just amazed there's money for food, never mind plates, after the Cellar has taken its cut!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 October, 2009, 05:06:52 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 October, 2009, 07:19:14 PM
I'm just amazed there's money for food, never mind plates, after the Cellar has taken its cut!

It's a perfect balance of finances that does it, plus I don't go on the piss like in those army days. That drinking lark is quite expensive!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 October, 2009, 07:45:37 AM
I've finished  what I was doing, now do I go back to bed, go and get a newspaper or have beans on toast with a couple of fried eggs!!!!!
I want sleep but I want food and the paper shop is only 1 minutes walk away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 October, 2009, 08:50:48 AM
Well that's all sorted, went to the paper shop, had beans on toast and now just waiting for it to settle before I go back to bed!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 19 October, 2009, 01:47:27 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 17 October, 2009, 10:43:20 AM
And every meal you eat from that crockery will contain a reminder of that money "wasted" at the bottom, beneath the gravy.  The ceramic laughter of the percelain gods rings in your ears like a modern day Orpheus and you suspect you're being taken for a ride.....

Horrid.  Been there.

That's what happens when you spunk an irrational amount of cash on a 'Wonder Woman' breakfast service young man!
Minor impediment of the day? Lack of an extra button at the bottom of my dress, damn thing keeps flapping open as I walk
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 October, 2009, 01:58:13 PM
QuoteLack of an extra button at the bottom of my dress, damn thing keeps flapping open as I walk

Miiiiiike!  Your friend is teasing the marrieds!  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 October, 2009, 02:02:57 PM
Sorry Tordels, I have no control over what she says.  And believe me I've tried....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 19 October, 2009, 02:05:05 PM
Ooops! Sorry chaps, it's only a minor impediment - honest!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 October, 2009, 02:10:21 PM
They love it really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 19 October, 2009, 02:32:18 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 19 October, 2009, 02:05:05 PM
Ooops! Sorry chaps, it's only a minor impediment - honest!

For you, but not for the rest of us.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 19 October, 2009, 03:08:11 PM
*sigh* back to trousers it is then...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 19 October, 2009, 04:37:31 PM
Next you will be publishing photies on the board for us.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 19 October, 2009, 04:58:58 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 19 October, 2009, 04:37:31 PM
Next you will be publishing photies on the board for us.

V

Your hypnotic suggestion techniques aren't working! You need to take some tips from Derren Brown.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 October, 2009, 05:10:24 PM
Bloody Jedi mind tricks, eh V?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 October, 2009, 05:26:04 PM
Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile phones in libraries.  Mobile. Phones. In. LIBRARIES.

Annoying, isn't it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 19 October, 2009, 05:49:40 PM
so not a big fan of the mobile phone then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 October, 2009, 06:10:04 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 19 October, 2009, 05:49:40 PM
so not a big fan of the mobile phone then?

In fairness, it's not the phones, it's the PEOPLE WHO SHOUT INTO THEM FOR WHAT SEEMS LIKE HOURS.  In libraries.  Without sanction.  It's a library.  There's the door. Step outside and do your shouting and then come back in.  I promise you won't die.  Stay here and I make no such guarantees.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 October, 2009, 06:18:30 PM
I dont want to hear someones mobile conversation when i am waiting to pay for something a shop .They even continue the conversation when they are paying which i think is just plain impolite.

A lot of people have no manners and no awareness of others and a mobile is just gives them the means to be even more annoying than they already are.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 October, 2009, 06:32:38 PM
Sadly at Christmas one of our neighbours died. She was a lovely woman in her 90's and the house remained empty until a property bod bought it in the summer.
Once alterations were finished it went up for rent at £895 per month, we didn't think it was worth that much, especially as the info was wrong on the website.
Anyway we saw visitors come and go and they all asked us questions but it never seemed to get a tenant. That is until a couple moved in about a month ago.
Now you should never judge a book by a cover BUT...........
I fucking knew it had went to people on the DHSS as there was no way in the current climate that anyone was going to pay that amount of rent. Well they have two large dogs that are permanently locked up in the shed at the bottom of the garden. I have only seen them once. They have two parrots that are kept in their cage in the garden with a bloody towel on the top of the cage to, I suppose, keep the rain out!!!
They have two cats, a tortoise and who knows what else in the house. They shout all the time at each other and there is a small baby in the house, that must be nice for it (don't know what it is).
Anyway they wanted to build a fence and asked if we wanted the good side facing us (as you are supposed to do), I said no mate it's your fence you have that side. Then they began to build it. After I had noticed the first two panels go up I had to stop them and tell them that the fence already there is actually their fence. They stopped for about a week. I was thinking that they would pull the other fence down, well it is logical.
I got up today and noticed three more panels in place behind the already in situ fence. I had to confront the scum. I knocked on the door and asked them what they were doing with the old fence as it would start to rot during the following months once the rain got between the fences and the wind can't get in to dry them out. Plus it looks absolutely ridiculous from our side. Dimbo then says, "You said we could have the good side on our side" to which I said (politely) "yes mate, I'm not on about that, I'm on about you leaving the old fence in place. you can't see how stupid it looks on this side." He then said "Do you want me to take the old fence up."
I then explained that he should have just replaced the old fence with the new as that is what normal people do. Jesus Fucking Christ, I will be glad when the fence is up and I don't have to see these twats again.
I am an understanding person but how does someone think they can build a bigger fence behind a fence they already have!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 19 October, 2009, 06:47:34 PM
That red text right there is a minor impediment(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 October, 2009, 06:48:46 PM
My easy going blue should not be wasted on those cretins next door!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 October, 2009, 06:50:38 PM
 :o CF breaks out the red ink!  Well you might quake in fear, neighboureenos!  

An update on my far more important phone-library situation.  Right now, another annoying lady is shouting into her phone.  Miracle of miracles, the nice Afghani library security guard (there are four - it's that kind of library) approaches her and quietly reminds her that this is a library.  She turns towards him briefly and in a completely dismissive tone (I kid you not) says: "Sorry, be with you in a minute, I'm on the phone".  Poor bugger just stands there with his mouth hanging open while she wanders on through the stacks, still shouting.  I can still hear her in the distance.  

That poor man has had a hard time lately.  Last Thursday evening a young fellow was getting his disturbing sexual kicks by playing a grim-sounding porn movie incredibly loudly on his laptop, having sat down at long table which already housed a gaggle of schoolgirls.  The young security guard was first on the scene, and tried to get the 21st century pervert to shut it down.  "What? What's the problem  I just forgot my earphones, yeah?".   Two of his larger colleagues appeared and the techno-flasher was escorted from the premises.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 October, 2009, 06:53:38 PM
I would be seriously thinking about calling the RSPCA myself as it sounds like fuckwits next door are not even fit to look after a pot plant.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 October, 2009, 06:59:47 PM
I am thinking about it Peter as I forgot to mention that they have three ducks as well. I was thinking that once the fence was finished they would let the dogs out. Now that they have ducks I can't see this being possible as I think they would be torn to pieces. I know our other neighbour is thinking of calling the RSPCA so I will wait and find out if she has.
Why us, what have we done to get the Adams family moving in next door.
Come to think of it, I wonder, if you are renting are you allowed to keep a zoo?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 October, 2009, 07:01:13 PM
Couldn't make all that post CF, the red just did my head in.  But I read enough to be annoyed on your behalf and understood the red. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 October, 2009, 11:27:57 PM
I really need to see a doctor about my foot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 October, 2009, 11:45:34 PM
I had a dream where my glasses broke.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 October, 2009, 06:56:17 PM
Our department has moved to another floor of the building and all the teams reorganised. Plenty of minor irritations (changing the default printer, not knowing the fax number, not enough coat hooks etc etc), but to listen to the constant moaning you'd think we'd been on Chairman Mao's Long fecking March!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 20 October, 2009, 07:13:35 PM
My new (purple if you were wondering and I'm sure you weren't)Dr Martins are determined to gouge a hole into the back of my ankles - there's only one cure; THE CLEANSING FIRE!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 October, 2009, 08:39:08 PM
I thought there were four slices of pizza left but there are only two, which isn't really enough for dinner, and I didn't go to the shops on the way home as I thought I had half a pizza left.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 20 October, 2009, 09:12:24 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 20 October, 2009, 07:13:35 PM
My new (purple if you were wondering and I'm sure you weren't)Dr Martins are determined to gouge a hole into the back of my ankles - there's only one cure; THE CLEANSING FIRE!

What is it with women and purple doc martins. My missus has a pair.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 20 October, 2009, 10:20:01 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 20 October, 2009, 09:12:24 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 20 October, 2009, 07:13:35 PM
My new (purple if you were wondering and I'm sure you weren't)Dr Martins are determined to gouge a hole into the back of my ankles - there's only one cure; THE CLEANSING FIRE!

What is it with women and purple doc martins. My missus has a pair.






V

The pretty colour! Well that and the fact that your toes are safe when you're at a gig with clumsy men!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 October, 2009, 10:51:39 PM
I bought GREMLINS for 2-99 on DVD on Friday* and watched it with Mrs and Tiny Tips.

He liked it so much that he took it away with them when they went to visit Mrs Tips' chum down in the Borders.

They watched it but it then got stuck in here DVD player (which is built in to her telly).

It won't eject but it every other control works.  So you can watch any film at her house now as long as it's GREMLINS.


Actually, the fact that it's GREMLINS that is stuck in this way is close to fucking ironic genius so maybe this should be in the LIFE IS FANTASTIC thread






* PS - it was going cheap in HMV but don't waste your money; it's a great film but a really crappy transfer (almost VHS in quality) and has no extras at all.


And why in Grud's name is it still certificate 15. The knife work is all I can think of.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 20 October, 2009, 10:59:17 PM
I want a pair of Docs. They used to be all I would wear but at some point I switched to less painful shoes. Must get some.

They won't be purple.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 October, 2009, 11:17:01 PM
Gah! I finally decided to get Spotify and it turns out I need an invitation code. Unless I want to pay for it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 20 October, 2009, 11:56:12 PM
Top tip for breaking in new boots: wear them once, find out where it hurts, then start covering the injury with a plaster when you wear them again. Eventually the boots will soften up to the extent you no longer need to pad out the bits of your feet that get sore.

My minor impediment of the day is I'm knackered as usual. And I still have some work to do before I can go to bed, otherwise I won't be able to do my job properly. I could settle for not doing my job properly, I suppose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 21 October, 2009, 08:24:02 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 20 October, 2009, 10:51:39 PM

And why in Grud's name is it still certificate 15. The knife work is all I can think of.

Sorry to spin off top but do films get re-certificated? I always wondered this as lot of old horror or whatever seems to have its old rating even though the standards change. Are films ever resubmitted to the Film Board or whatever? If not I wonder why I mean Gremlins is surely a PG these days or one of those various 12 certificates they create whenever a big film needs to find its audience?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 October, 2009, 06:56:34 PM
Just now i was walking home up the seafront and crossing a road and out of nowhere a car with a geezer driving came speeding round the corner and honking the horn at me which made me jump out of my skin which wound me up so i ran after the car for a bit but unfortunately the car got away which was unfortunate.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 21 October, 2009, 07:15:12 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 20 October, 2009, 11:56:12 PM
Top tip for breaking in new boots: wear them once, find out where it hurts, then start covering the injury with a plaster when you wear them again. Eventually the boots will soften up to the extent you no longer need to pad out the bits of your feet that get sore.

My minor impediment of the day is I'm knackered as usual. And I still have some work to do before I can go to bed, otherwise I won't be able to do my job properly. I could settle for not doing my job properly, I suppose.

thanks for the suggestion! It always takes me ages to wear in shoes/boots, being on steroids for over 10 years has left me with skin like tissue paper  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 21 October, 2009, 07:18:39 PM
Minor impediment of the day - burnt a saucepan making mushroom risotto. Oh spoons
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 October, 2009, 07:31:50 PM
Quote...being on steroids for over 10 years has left me with skin like tissue paper

Small price to pay for Olympic Gold!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 21 October, 2009, 07:36:43 PM
You know Wild, if I thought I was due one of these EVERY DAY I'd be a little more down in the mouth than you.

Although seemingly I am getting one a day, maybe I just refuse to see reality.

My impediment today is my brother popped by for a chat this morning.  Turned out what he wanted to talk about was something he got the wrong end of the stick about yesterday and had been brewing up a grump storm ever since.  He spoke to me, explaining it all.  I told him it was all a massive misunderstanding, he believed me and went back to work.

And I've spent the rest of the day feeling like utter shite because he felt, for whatever reason, he couldn't tell me straight away when we spoke on the phone the previous day.  My mood isn't HIS fault, it's mine for reacting this way, but I can't help but feel (childishly) that he just dumped HIS grump on me and ran off so I was stuck with it.  I know very well that if he were remotely aware of how this had affected me he'd be gutted.  Double standards, thy name is brotherhood.  I'm the strong one, I can cope would be my only response.  

All very silly.  Dinner and coffee have perked me up no end by comparison, but I'm still not feeling like going to my mates gig and seeing real people.  Very sullen and grumpy for, essentially, no reason.  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 21 October, 2009, 07:39:49 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 21 October, 2009, 07:36:43 PM
You know Wild, if I thought I was due one of these EVERY DAY I'd be a little more down in the mouth than you.

Although seemingly I am getting one a day, maybe I just refuse to see reality.

My impediment today is my brother popped by for a chat this morning.  Turned out what he wanted to talk about was something he got the wrong end of the stick about yesterday and had been brewing up a grump storm ever since.  He spoke to me, explaining it all.  I told him it was all a massive misunderstanding, he believed me and went back to work.

And I've spent the rest of the day feeling like utter shite because he felt, for whatever reason, he couldn't tell me straight away when we spoke on the phone the previous day.  My mood isn't HIS fault, it's mine for reacting this way, but I can't help but feel (childishly) that he just dumped HIS grump on me and ran off so I was stuck with it.  I know very well that if he were remotely aware of how this had affected me he'd be gutted.  Double standards, thy name is brotherhood.  I'm the strong one, I can cope would be my only response.  

All very silly.  Dinner and coffee have perked me up no end by comparison, but I'm still not feeling like going to my mates gig and seeing real people.  Very sullen and grumpy for, essentially, no reason.  

I'm glad you're feeling a bit better, I don't like to think of you being sad AT ALL. Call me later?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 October, 2009, 08:03:51 PM
Brothers.  Can't live with 'em, didn't strangle them when they were too small to fight back.  

Much as they wreck my head on an almost continual basis, I'd be lost without mine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 October, 2009, 08:04:42 PM
Does he do all the map reading!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 October, 2009, 08:06:45 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 October, 2009, 08:04:42 PM
Does he do all the map reading!

Ha!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 October, 2009, 08:11:34 PM
I aim to please
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 October, 2009, 11:10:01 AM
... Because I'm sat here studying group consolidation of balance sheets, when I could be drawing Dirty Frank for Bolt. 

Bah!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 22 October, 2009, 11:18:42 AM
Looking forward to seeing that, Jim!

I forgot my wallet this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 October, 2009, 01:22:12 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 21 October, 2009, 08:03:51 PM

Much as they wreck my head on an almost continual basis, I'd be lost without mine.

I'd be richer without mine. "Do you want to meet up for a pint?" generally translates to "Do you want to buy me a pint while I explain to you how grateful I'd be for the loan* of £10/20/50 ..."

Cheers!

Jim

*By loan, I mean that in the karmic sense, rather than any strict definition involving, you know, actual repayment of the money. Obviously.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 22 October, 2009, 01:23:23 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 21 October, 2009, 07:31:50 PM
Quote...being on steroids for over 10 years has left me with skin like tissue paper

Small price to pay for Olympic Gold!

The tiddlywinks gold will be MINE in 2012!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 22 October, 2009, 04:28:26 PM
bloody students  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 October, 2009, 05:15:00 PM
I'm dealing with a company called "Spook Erection". I mean, come on...!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 22 October, 2009, 05:23:18 PM
It's certainly topical...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 October, 2009, 08:08:06 PM
Quote from: Banners on 22 October, 2009, 05:15:00 PM
I'm dealing with a company called "Spook Erection". I mean, come on...!

M@

What on earth do they do? Sell viagra to ghosts or put up haunted scaffolding?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 22 October, 2009, 08:10:02 PM
Relief for the horny dead.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 22 October, 2009, 08:29:08 PM
And when you say dealing with them...???
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 October, 2009, 11:01:20 PM
This raspberry cider is pretty gross.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 23 October, 2009, 09:22:57 AM
Try raspberry beer instead.
Mmmm, Frambosenbier...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 23 October, 2009, 10:19:34 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare
What on earth do they do? Sell viagra to ghosts or put up haunted scaffolding?

It's to do with a show of "The Little Shop of Horrors", so I thought they may be making the big plant (aka Audrey II) and do stuff like that - which would make the name quite good I suppose. However, they do car boot sales. And their logo - unless I'm misinterpreting it - is of a ghost with a bulge in its trousers. Ahem.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 23 October, 2009, 10:22:38 AM
Quotea ghost with a bulge in its trousers.

Patrick Swayze?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 October, 2009, 01:06:58 PM
I STILL haven't made it to the shops to get Prog 1658.  :o


(wondering what car boot sales have to do with Little Shop of Horrors)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 October, 2009, 01:33:42 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 23 October, 2009, 01:06:58 PM
(wondering what car boot sales have to do with Little Shop of Horrors)

Maybe the boot in question is in a Renault Eclipse?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 23 October, 2009, 06:18:01 PM
Quote from: Banners on 22 October, 2009, 05:15:00 PM
I'm dealing with a company called "Spook Erection". I mean, come on...!

M@

Hurr hurr, you said SPOOK  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 23 October, 2009, 08:23:21 PM
Thought we'd sneak out to the cinema tonight but there's nothing but horror films and bland rom coms on. Mrs Tips doesn't do horror and neither of us are keen on a bland rom com.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 23 October, 2009, 09:59:50 PM
Quote from: Banners on 23 October, 2009, 10:19:34 AMAnd their logo - unless I'm misinterpreting it - is of a ghost with a bulge in its trousers. Ahem.

Bloody hell - it is as well!

(http://www.spookerection.com/images/spook_ghost_lblue.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 October, 2009, 10:05:50 PM
It looks like a Moomin after it meets a steamroller.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 23 October, 2009, 10:07:25 PM
Glad someone else googled them. However, I now hope Banners doesn't get into shite for lampooning them on the Internet. I've met him. He's a skinny lad and needs to eat.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 October, 2009, 10:30:24 PM
I was woken up at 4 in the morning by my own stomach as it wanted me to vomit. It was pretty much just straight up projectile vomiting. And I didn't even feel shitty enough afterwards to justify taking the day off work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 October, 2009, 10:41:12 PM
Forgot to mention I was sick on my pens.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 October, 2009, 10:47:31 PM
The fourth episode of Season 2 of The Clone Wars makes absolutely no sense.  The scope and quality of the visuals have never been better, but the story and situations were incomprehensible, and absolutely nothing exploded.  And they were doing so well!  I checked the credits but the hand of George was nowhere to be seen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 October, 2009, 11:37:30 PM
I almost fell over and dropped my toast when I came up the stairs.
Title: The same subject you see elsewhere no the thread - blame my stupid phone
Post by: Mike Gloady on 24 October, 2009, 11:47:46 PM
Get well soon Godpleton. Sounds like you're coming down with something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 25 October, 2009, 12:31:56 AM
In recent days, I've been finding it more and more difficult to fall asleep. This resulted in me not hearing my alarm and nearly being late for work this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 October, 2009, 09:57:08 AM
I keep thinking its Monday.

Also have the clocks gone an hour backwards ?

:-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 25 October, 2009, 10:16:16 AM
Yeah, they have.  And Wild7/Kate even INFORMED me of this.  No wonder the graveyard wasn't open when I got there (normally opens at 9).  Sorry for waking you up so early on a Sunday mum and dad!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 October, 2009, 07:29:05 PM
Illness seems to be all gone so I had to go in to work but I still have a sore throat from super painful vomiting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 25 October, 2009, 08:46:49 PM
I spent 6 hours filling and sanding today but although I've made good progress towards the completion of the job, after I'd finished I felt nothing.
:-X

But to balance the scale, Vincent D'Onofrio's rigor mortis 'bug' acting in Men In Black made me laugh out loud.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 25 October, 2009, 08:52:36 PM
The Rakes have split up - I'm not claiming they were a great band, but they provided one of the most fun nights out I've ever had
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 October, 2009, 06:15:11 PM
Bollocks, the fridge light has blown!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 October, 2009, 08:44:36 PM
someone at our office decided that the level of lighting in the office was too dim for "health & safety" (despite the fact that we work from screens, which have their own illumination) Over the weekend they have had the whole floor fitted out with new lighting. Several people reported headaches due to the blinding glare, but I was informed that wearing my shades in the office did not conform to the dress code.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 26 October, 2009, 09:37:35 PM
I got in from work at five to eight. Just in time to put the kettle on before University Challenge. Or so I thought. Unfortunately, BBC mandarins, in their wisdom, have decreed that us merry Jockos would rather watch some tedious pish about clans instead.

And DdD, what is your policy on mirrored contact lenses?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 October, 2009, 10:05:10 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 26 October, 2009, 09:37:35 PM
And DdD, what is your policy on mirrored contact lenses?

I think my policy is: :o COOL!  :o - where can I get some? Oh wait, that would involve putting things in my eye, right? *shudder*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 October, 2009, 09:09:25 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 October, 2009, 06:15:11 PM
Bollocks, the fridge light has blown!

Ours blew three years ago- and we still haven't replaced it.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 October, 2009, 01:38:11 AM
So I borrow my Mother's DS (21st century living or what) to help me decide whether I'm going to take the plunge this Christmas and get one myself.  I fiddle about with the 42 Classic Games thing, heh, that bowling is pretty good fun.  Then I put in Professor Layton and 2 hours of good solid late-night working time pass in an instant. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 October, 2009, 08:28:38 AM
Why is it that the more irritable you become, the more cling film sticks to itself?
Design flaw surely?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 28 October, 2009, 10:43:04 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 October, 2009, 06:15:11 PM
Bollocks, the fridge light has blown!

are you sure it doesn't switch on when the fridge door is closed?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 October, 2009, 10:55:49 AM
Quote from: wild-seven on 28 October, 2009, 10:43:04 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 October, 2009, 06:15:11 PM
Bollocks, the fridge light has blown!

are you sure it doesn't switch on when the fridge door is closed?

Sadly I have it to the left of the keyboard to remind me to go down the town and get a replacement and it has blown. My good lady was all for the fridge being dead but after two days it's still cold in there. Not that I'm sat in there now typing ;)
So that's a bulb for the fridge, one for the cooker (I'm with you SBT on this one as I think this went 5 years ago ish), mince for spaghetti tonight, a piece of replacement glass for Sam's den for when we move the chickens into that, a couple of buckets, a newspaper, watch some recorded telly, etc...
A mans work is never done ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 October, 2009, 11:40:54 AM
3 seem to have forgotten I have a 24 month contract, rather than an 18 month one, so have offered me a free upgrade on my mobile next month ie. 6 months early.

However, they don't have any better handsets than the Nokia E71 I already own.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 28 October, 2009, 11:48:35 AM
There's a good chance they won't have any decent new handsets in 6 months either. Nokia have been stuck in the "we fear change" rut for years now. Sorry. I'm Nokiaphobic ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 October, 2009, 11:53:05 AM
I may have to switch allegiance and get an iPhone. ~shudder~

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 28 October, 2009, 11:58:03 AM
Quote from: uncle fester on 28 October, 2009, 11:48:35 AM
There's a good chance they won't have any decent new handsets in 6 months either. Nokia have been stuck in the "we fear change" rut for years now. Sorry. I'm Nokiaphobic ;)

You've not experienced true mobile phone horror till you've used a vodafone own-brand one, I still need councilling
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 28 October, 2009, 12:10:20 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 28 October, 2009, 11:58:03 AM
Quote from: uncle fester on 28 October, 2009, 11:48:35 AM
There's a good chance they won't have any decent new handsets in 6 months either. Nokia have been stuck in the "we fear change" rut for years now. Sorry. I'm Nokiaphobic ;)

You've not experienced true mobile phone horror till you've used a vodafone own-brand one, I still need councilling

Have you heard of the Sagem MV3020? Airbrushed out of its own company history. Unique Selling Point was it fell apart as you were using it. When mine 'retired' it was home to more sellotape than technology.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 October, 2009, 12:12:21 PM
Sod it I'm gonna have to go down the town and do those jobs or else I'm in the brown smelly ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 October, 2009, 12:50:06 PM
Because I just had a fifteen minute conversation with some insurance nut, which is enough of a minor impediment to qualify for inclusion here by itself - BUT THERE'S MORE!

Found my mum had an "insurance" policy from the water company.  Phoned them to check what it was for (all other phonecalls have been to organise the direct debit being changed into my name or whatever, but since being screwed over by holiday insurance I'm always sceptical).  Spent ages trying to figure out WHAT it covered, talked to three seperate people (politely, I'm always polite) before finally being told it's for "pest nfestation, burst sewers, broken water pipes" and other highly unlikely things.  I've never known anyone to have this insurance.  I have never had it.  I've never met anyone who's had one of these things happen.  And, being insurance people, they will wriggle like a snake in a frying pan to get out of paying up anyway.

I'm sure, should this happen, I'll be slightly annoyed with myself for cancelling the insurance.  But I'm also sure that my dear disabled, blind and living off a pension mum, having had this for ten years, has paid more money than she'd ever have saved.  Were she alive, I like to think she'd understand. 

And if that wasn't enough of a minor impediment, I've made four other calls like that today.  Whoohoo! 

Time for a cuppa and frozen pizza.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 28 October, 2009, 12:56:53 PM
The Insurance racket; the career choice of people who would have been criminals but didn't fancy the hours
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 October, 2009, 01:14:01 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 28 October, 2009, 12:50:06 PM
Time for a cuppa and frozen pizza.

I'd prefer fizzy pop and a cooked pizza myself Mike. Hope you don't break your teeth ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 October, 2009, 01:20:09 PM
It's cooking now.  I learned me lesson *ow*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 October, 2009, 03:11:56 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 October, 2009, 06:15:11 PM
Bollocks, the fridge light has blown!

New bulb (it cost £2:48) in and just like God I have created light.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 28 October, 2009, 03:54:35 PM
I bow down before you oh light maker *does interpretive dance of the donkey*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 October, 2009, 12:14:24 AM
People and companies who make a living out selling unnecessary or non-existent services to people who cannot afford to lay out all in one go when things unexpectedly go wrong are just f***ing scum. I'm sorry to hear you've had to deal with their ilk, Mike.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 October, 2009, 10:15:44 PM
Went to Brighton today with the family and couldn't park on the promenade because there was a Fucking Massive Marquee being constructed on about 50 parking places. We then drove around the town looking for a place and entered an NCP place only to see at the last second a tiny price list. Jesus Christ they wanted about £9 for a few hours. I reversed out, I ain't paying that for Brighton. We then drove back to the prom and I used my advanced driving skills to get into a gap a few inches longer than the car.
We then had a pleasant day.


By the way we didn't see Peter Wolf anywhere!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 30 October, 2009, 09:13:48 AM
He was probably loping about inside the marquee?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 30 October, 2009, 10:18:10 AM
"Roll up! Roll up!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 October, 2009, 12:37:54 PM
QuoteBy the way we didn't see Peter Wolf anywhere!

He was probably busily writing a post complaining about flash gits parking on the promenade!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 31 October, 2009, 12:22:44 PM
I just called to cancel my contract and 3 have now remembered I'm on a 24 month deal, not an 18 month deal. Bah!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 31 October, 2009, 03:00:20 PM
My girlfriend's mate has let her down for tonight.
This gives me the worrying feeling she may end up accompanying me and being a massive killjoy all night, like last year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 November, 2009, 09:14:25 AM
The unsmiling, sourpuss, eastern-European-staffed UK service sector, especially catering and hospitality. I understand why the service sector depends upon eastern Europeans. You couldn't get middle class Brits to do the jobs they do, looking as smart as they do, for the wages those jobs pay, but you can get well-trained, ambitious middle class migrants from the Baltic states who are interested in careers in hotel and restaurant management. The only Brits you get wanting careers in these industries just aren't posh enough to satisfy the snobbery of the employers involved and many of them lack the basic skills needed. At least with foreigners if they don't have a wide vocabulary and good people skills it's because English isn't their first language and they have a superior attitude, but they are well groomed and business-like into the bargain.

However, business-like isn't the same thing as efficient, and employers seem not to know or care what the difference is. So they employ talking mannequins to mumble a script full of words they have no clue how to pronounce, who cannot answer a query that deviates from the range of answers they are expecting (they ask the questions; you, the customer, supply the answers), who do not understanding the words 'plumbing' or 'cistern' when you report a maintenance issue that it would be in the hotel's interest to fix (the flush lever arm went up and down but the cistern failed to empty three times in 2 days), and who have no idea that the scruffy looking old man in walking gear carrying two large rucksacks is a surgeon, is more posh than they can imagine, and his room has been paid for by a professional body for orthopaedic surgeons, not a mysterious firm of which they have no record called 'Other... Something-Something?'

What irritates me is that so many of them seem to think the customer is an idiot for having no prior acquaintance with the hotel or restaurant's procedures, they seem to think they are better than their customers because they are posh where they come from and they look down on people who don't have expensive tastes, they can barely disguise their contempt for anyone who is so poor and revolting they pay for a hotel booking with £290 in Tesco Clubcard hotel vouchers instead of using a credit card like decent people of consequence, and few of them have grasped the simple equation that you don't rebuke customers gruffly with the words "there is a queue" when there obviously isn't one and the company you work for wants to take upwards of £30 off them for a quick lunch for two.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 November, 2009, 08:18:57 AM
I have quite a few things to do in the garden today and it's pissing down ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 November, 2009, 10:13:25 AM
Just got back from buying some posts at the fencing shop and when the total came up on the till I had to say that's not right. "Oh yes" said the seller "you've forgot to add the V.A.T."

Why can't they just have two prices next to the product so you can see the true cost for us non business people. The conning c**ts (I did that bit for you Roger)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 03 November, 2009, 10:21:05 AM
I think by rights they should CF. The last few years that I worked in the Builders Merchant the legislaton got a lot tighter. All of our display prices had to show price excl. and inc. VAT. It wa quite a big deal, with head office regularly sending inspectors round.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 03 November, 2009, 10:22:18 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 November, 2009, 10:13:25 AM

Why can't they just have two prices next to the product so you can see the true cost for us non business people. The conning c**ts (I did that bit for you Roger) [/color]

At the very least the price should be marked as "Ex VAT" so that you can work out the full price yourself.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 November, 2009, 11:15:29 AM
I recently became the block manager of the building we live in as my predecessor resigned, having fired off an email tirade of abuse to one of the directors with sexist and offensive comments. So I have to get things in order now such as sorting out the lights in the car park which have not worked for about five months. The car park is pitch black and the only lighting is supplied by the moon. I get some money which helps and as I work from home I can do some of these tasks.

So this morning I was expecting a recommended sparky (after waiting weeks to get his details from my builder). Having been left in the lurch enough times by tradesmen I called 15 mins before he was meant to show up and he said he has to reschedule.

Now I just looked out of the window and I see the van of some Eastern European workers who can barely put together a few words of English (who are doing some work in one of the flats) and one of them is sweeping out litter and crap from his van into our carpark. As it is me who will have to clear it up I went and told this jerk to pick it up. If he hasn't I'll report him to the agency that employs them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 November, 2009, 11:21:26 AM
You need to organise your block and recruit some sort of Defence Unit to stop this sort of thing ;)

On the rest of the block stuff, better you than me SuperSurfer. I bet it will be a thankless job, good luck with it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 November, 2009, 11:34:08 AM
Thanks CF, but at least I can make sure things get done and not just talked about.

It is like a block war at the moment regarding efforts to refurbish the communal areas. We had the third push to get this done in the last few years and some people always manage to keep throwing spanners in the works. What is a pain is that they are keeping down the price of our property and even more importantly all those in the block do not have a pleasant welcoming communal area. They don't understand that a relatively small contribution per flat will add value to each flat and will mean they can get better rents and their flats won't be empty for weeks while they struggle to find tenants. Tight landlords!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 03 November, 2009, 12:14:02 PM
Rather than deliver the actual item to my Mum, Royal Mail instead delivered a card saying the sender was 72p under the item's proper postage charge. Then, rather than take it to the local Post Office a mile away, it's now at the Sorting Office from where it has to be collected, meaning a round trip of nearly 20 miles. She can't drive.

And you want me to support your strike. Hmmmm....

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 03 November, 2009, 12:27:59 PM
It took me a couple of minutes to find my glasses this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 November, 2009, 12:30:09 PM
I bet they were on your head.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 03 November, 2009, 12:49:23 PM
I think they ought to put the real (i.e. VAT inclusive) prices on everything.  Worked in a music shop for years, professional musicians found it a piece of pee to work out how much they were going to get back from the tax man.  My entire family are builders or in similar trades, they're at least as mathematically able as session bassists and guitar teachers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 November, 2009, 01:12:15 PM
Trapped a nerve in my shoulder and it's causing me considerable amounts of pain in my left arm and hand.  My prescribed painkillers either have me flying or throwing up so I'm having to be very careful with what I take which means they don't fully get rid of the pain.

It's been a week now so back to Doctor and on to a Chiropractor or something I feel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 05 November, 2009, 02:06:41 PM
Got an email that the magazine that accepted one of my short stories just went under.

On the one hand, it won't be in print (so if anyone knows where I can place a 14,000 word science fiction story about "earwigs" please let me know).

But on the other hand, they paid upon acceptance. So I got my money.

To be honest, I'd rather see it in print  :'(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 05 November, 2009, 02:15:49 PM
Mmmmmm.  Get paid twice I say, although I'm not a legal bot so for goodness sake make sure you CAN resell it before you try. 

On the upside, if it got accepted by ONE publisher, it'll probably get accepted again.  Worst comes to the worst, you could always give it away if it means you'll see it in print - after all, you HAVE already been "paid".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 05 November, 2009, 02:22:04 PM
Aye, sound advice Mike. Thanks.

I suppose I should inquire about publishing it elsewhere - I know I sold it for first time publishing rights, but as it won't be published by the magazine, I'm not sure where I stand.

Other writing annoyances of the day: finished my story for Kerrin's comp...and the bugger is 800 words long and strong...drokkin' 'ell, what a day!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 05 November, 2009, 04:31:43 PM
My minor impediment is my lack of facility with art programs (specifically illustrator and photoshop) which I'm struggling with to cobble together my art competition entry in snatched bits of time here and there for a while now.  It looks nice, but it's going to take a bloody age to finish as I've only recently discovered easy ways to do what I need. 

Yeah, I know there are tutorials here and elsewhere, but I'm rubbish at learning if I can't make tons of mistakes myself.  Now I've MADE some, my next entry will take a TINY amount of time by comparison.  So hurray!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 November, 2009, 04:41:15 PM
There seems to be an above average number of wet sundays which is a pisser because i want to do a boot fair.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 November, 2009, 04:45:03 PM
I don't think a fairground full of boots will entice anyone Peter!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 November, 2009, 10:44:12 PM
Work and personal email are both down, as is my company's online banking at the Co-op (since yesterday). The internet is shit, basically.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 November, 2009, 08:03:13 PM
Double points with Odeon loyalty card this week. Is there anything I want to see? Is there fuck. (Bright Star isn't on in MK).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 09 November, 2009, 12:29:46 PM
Quote from: Banners on 06 November, 2009, 10:44:12 PM
Work and personal email are both down, as is my company's online banking at the Co-op (since yesterday). The internet is shit, basically.

This summer I opened an online banking account with Tesco because I had a few hundred pounds spare and I wanted to get £20 worth of hotel vouchers for nothing. Well, the few hundred pounds wasn't spare for long and I urgently needed it back because once my year's teaching ran out and I was on the dole again I was soon at the limits of my overdraft.

However, there was a very complicated process involved in registering for online access involving my customer number, registration number, password and PIN. There was no telephone helpline for customers until they had requested a registration number by post, so I was stuck at that point and couldn't find my customer number, even though I knew my account number. With an awful lot on my plate (never-ending communication with the benefits agencies, summer of DIY, numerous job applications and interviews, 50-hour working week again as of September), it took me 5 months from opening the account to finally getting the online registration done. Even then it was only with the assistance of the nice people on the telephone helpline. In the same transaction I closed the account and had them send me a cheque for the balance on the grounds that it was more trouble than it was worth and the money was more use to me in my current account than in savings.

I got my £20 worth of hotel vouchers, but I also incurred £20 in unauthorized overdraft charges for my current account while I couldn't get my hands on the cash, so the benefits of banking with Tesco were cancelled out by the difficulty I had using the account.

Today I got a leaflet in the post outlining the 20-or-so steps involved in registering for online banking, which just confirmed me in my conviction that it was never worth the bother.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 09 November, 2009, 10:07:48 PM
Bah - my Bahrain gig has been put back six days which means I'm going to have to beg an extra day off work or miss out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 November, 2009, 12:21:55 PM
I was speaking to a friend yesterday and because I was shopping he said he'd ring me in the evening, I said anytime will do as I'm off so will be in bed tomorrow.
The evening came and went, I stayed up through the night, to keep my body clock in order and went to bed this morning.
What does my friend do, he bloody rings me at 11:30.
THANKS MATE!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 November, 2009, 12:31:13 PM
Postman has just been and I've just realised that the Foo Fighters Greatest Hits CD still hasn't turned up.
I hate it when the gits put a few extra 'new' songs on just to entice you into buying it. Still it's a Christmas prezzie for the wife so I don't care.

Come on postie!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 November, 2009, 03:05:24 PM
Apparently my brother told a teacher to "fuck off".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 10 November, 2009, 04:46:19 PM
Oh Roger, he sounds like my kind of kid.  When I was five, I asked the teacher how to spell "fuck".  And other words too.  Yes, including that one. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 November, 2009, 11:45:59 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 November, 2009, 03:05:24 PM
Apparently my brother told a teacher to "fuck off".
Wrong thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 November, 2009, 12:04:45 AM
I did once as well or to be more exact i used a term of abuse beginning with A that comprises of two words preceded by "fucking".

This resulted in being caned 3 times but expulsion from the school was only just avoided.i also had to write a letter of apology to the teacher that i insulted.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 November, 2009, 01:57:45 AM
Coming soon to a movie theatre near you: Sgt Rock ...

IN THE FUTURE.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 11 November, 2009, 08:26:30 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 11 November, 2009, 01:57:45 AM
Coming soon to a movie theatre near you: Sgt Rock ...

IN THE FUTURE.

Yep saw that over at CBR and it made me cringe. What are they thinking, no really what the hell are they thinking???? At this point a few more years development hell might be a good think for the Sgt. Rock movie.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 11 November, 2009, 09:05:14 PM
Fucking work van bastard broke down today. Took the AA nearly 1hr to get to us. Towed half way across Leicestershire to the Ford depot. Then had to wait half hour for a replacement van. Then had to finish days work as no fucker else could be bothered to help out. Home at 19:30 kids in bed. Cunt.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 12 November, 2009, 11:13:12 AM
A client set an absolute deadline of today for their project being finished, so I switched priorities - to the detriment of other clients. Now, with what should be the final artwork finished, it turns out the client is away, and that it wasn't a real deadline anyway - they just said that as 'they wanted me to make a head start'. Gah!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 12 November, 2009, 11:15:39 AM
Arsehooles.

That's really effing selfish.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 12 November, 2009, 12:58:59 PM
No doubt many of you are wondering what became of the short story I mentioned in this thread ( ::)). The magazine did indeed own first publication rights and has chosen to exercise - unfortunately, not excorise - those rights; while this particular magazine has folded, the owners intend to launch a new edition "in a year or two" and publish the tale then. Yay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 November, 2009, 02:02:08 AM
The BT broadband tv ad couple.

They are just really irritating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 13 November, 2009, 09:21:09 AM
Windows.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 November, 2009, 11:17:26 AM
Have you tried turning it off...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 November, 2009, 01:36:13 PM
Just now i clicked on a website that contained malicious malware or viruses that screwed with my browser and it was a complete pain to shut the window and clear my browser cache in an attempt to get rid of it.Thankfully i managed to do this because it was really starting to piss me off and that was just before i was going to get advice on it.

I am on a Mac so its doubtful that it has further infected my hard drive.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 13 November, 2009, 01:38:10 PM
QuoteJust now i clicked on a website that contained malicious malware or viruses

You know what we're all thinking, don't you..?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 November, 2009, 02:25:36 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 13 November, 2009, 01:38:10 PM
QuoteJust now i clicked on a website that contained malicious malware or viruses

You know what we're all thinking, don't you..?

Heaven forbid that i should be up to something like that and if my mum found out she would kill me !

I dont actually know how i managed to get rid of it as it 2 restarts that did nothing and 1 force quit and it attempted to sabotage my toolbar and make it unresponsive so i couldnt click on "clear recent history" as it also made it impossible to close the window.

I got rid of the fucker in the end though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 13 November, 2009, 02:30:09 PM
QuoteHeaven forbid that i should be up to something like that and if my mum found out she would kill me !

What's wrong with stamp collecting? That's what his lordship rac meant. Wasn't it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 November, 2009, 05:01:17 PM
It's been such a busy week, and we make so little rubbish in our house, that we forgot to empty the bins this week and put the rubbish out. Good job we're vegetarian non-smokers, or there'd be quite a stink by the back door by next Friday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 November, 2009, 07:05:30 PM
Tesco have run out of scotch bonnet chillis, Asda's are mouldy beyond belief and the "Eastern Foodstore" up the road's aren't far behind. I've managed to get the least worst chillis obtainable round here, but they still ain't great.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SamuelAWilkinson on 13 November, 2009, 07:10:13 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 November, 2009, 05:01:17 PM
It's been such a busy week, and we make so little rubbish in our house, that we forgot to empty the bins this week and put the rubbish out. Good job we're vegetarian non-smokers, or there'd be quite a stink by the back door by next Friday.

You think that's bad; here in Leeds, the binmen have been on strike since July.

Yep, you read that right. I certainly support their demands, but that doesn't stop me considering buying some kind of nose filter for the walk to work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 November, 2009, 07:20:36 PM
Quote from: SamuelAWilkinson on 13 November, 2009, 07:10:13 PM
You think that's bad; here in Leeds, the binmen have been on strike since July.

Think I saw this on TV - they're the blokes who are being expected to take a £5,000 a year pay cut aren't they?

:o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 13 November, 2009, 07:29:22 PM
A ridiculous pay cut.  And if the whole thing goes on, hopefully the resident's anger will be directed at those responsible and not the bin men. 

It's a bit tough on you folks though. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 13 November, 2009, 07:34:17 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 November, 2009, 07:20:36 PM
Quote from: SamuelAWilkinson on 13 November, 2009, 07:10:13 PM
You think that's bad; here in Leeds, the binmen have been on strike since July.

Think I saw this on TV - they're the blokes who are being expected to take a £5,000 a year pay cut aren't they?

:o

On Look North (our local BBC news) they were saying about one street that hadn't had a collection for 10 weeks. Leeds Council have got private contracters in for people wondering by the way. God knows how much money that's wasting!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 13 November, 2009, 07:35:46 PM
Money they could be paying people they already employ.  Disgusting, and not just the (presumed) smell.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 November, 2009, 07:39:32 PM
What a joke that council is!

The pay review is being carried out by Councils nationwide following a court ruling that thousands of women Council employees were underpaid for years.

Councils face bills of millions to put matters right and began reviews of pay structures. In Leeds the bill is around £3m.

In Leeds 45 per cent of the Council's 35,000 staff will not be affected, and 47 per cent will receive pay increase. But eight per cent - about 3,500 workers - face pay cuts.


So what we shall do to you workers is decrease your pay significantly so that you will lose your houses.
I'm afraid we need to rise up and fight back people of Britain or we could all just sit back and watch X-Factor as that will make it everything okay. Cowell is part of the Governments policy to control the masses and make everyone a puppet.
Not me, I'm ready for the fight back, Who's with me?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 November, 2009, 07:45:23 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 13 November, 2009, 07:05:30 PM
Tesco have run out of scotch bonnet chillis, Asda's are mouldy beyond belief and the "Eastern Foodstore" up the road's aren't far behind. I've managed to get the least worst chillis obtainable round here, but they still ain't great.

Grow your own Noisy! A friend of mine is a chilli growing maniac. There's a greenhouse full of untold varieties but he also grows them inside as pot plants, they're surprisingly cheerful plants to look at, he's even got them in his office.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 13 November, 2009, 08:07:20 PM
Yeah, I'll fight back with you CF.  If it isn't too difficult....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 November, 2009, 08:24:42 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 13 November, 2009, 08:07:20 PM
Yeah, I'll fight back with you CF.  If it isn't too difficult....

I don't know if I'll be able to get up from this laptop and start the revolution just yet. Plus I've got to keep paying the mortgage for a couple more years, so once that's paid up the fight back will begin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 13 November, 2009, 08:38:32 PM
Yeah.  Later.

Mmmmmmm.  Just had a cracking plate of mashed spuds with finely chopped spring onion and chives.  Made a little too much actually, but it was so good I left my sausages for a sandwich later when I'm hungry.  My minor impediment being my belly not being large enough for the mash, carrots AND sausage.  And that the security light in the back garden kept going off because of a bloody fox. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 November, 2009, 08:43:01 PM
I'm trying to find the thread about the latest Big Finish CD's but my search just can't find it. I wanted to post that the new CD arrived today and that I'm going to listen to it at work later.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 November, 2009, 10:46:27 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 November, 2009, 07:39:32 PM
What a joke that council is!

The pay review is being carried out by Councils nationwide following a court ruling that thousands of women Council employees were underpaid for years.

Councils face bills of millions to put matters right and began reviews of pay structures. In Leeds the bill is around £3m.

In Leeds 45 per cent of the Council's 35,000 staff will not be affected, and 47 per cent will receive pay increase. But eight per cent - about 3,500 workers - face pay cuts.


So what we shall do to you workers is decrease your pay significantly so that you will lose your houses.
I'm afraid we need to rise up and fight back people of Britain or we could all just sit back and watch X-Factor as that will make it everything okay. Cowell is part of the Governments policy to control the masses and make everyone a puppet.
Not me, I'm ready for the fight back, Who's with me?

I am but i have been in the fight for years already .

I dont want to start on all this here either.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 November, 2009, 11:32:56 PM
They gave me a gift card at work today for being flexible and a good worker in general, after I'd paid for my lunch. The real problem is that this is almost certainly the smoking gun which proves to my rampantly paranoid self that my employers are going to fire my ass just for fun.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 13 November, 2009, 11:37:09 PM
I had the most tasteless dinner ever. Might as well have eaten cardboard covered in sadness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 12:12:14 AM
Thor isn't being shot on the field round the back of my house in Newport Pagnell.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 14 November, 2009, 12:17:38 AM
Quote from: Kerrin on 13 November, 2009, 07:45:23 PM
Grow your own Noisy! A friend of mine is a chilli growing maniac. There's a greenhouse full of untold varieties but he also grows them inside as pot plants, they're surprisingly cheerful plants to look at, he's even got them in his office.

Ah, I've tried that twice. They get to about 3-4 inches, then go grey-mouldy and die. I don't think my flat's an ideal place for house plants - not enough light. Either that or I over-watered them (despite trying quite hard not to).

I'm managing to keep several cacti and a dragon fruit plant alive, but that's about my limit indoors.

My pepper-pot was quite tasty, though. Predictably enough, the GF didn't like it. It had vegetables and seasoning in...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 November, 2009, 12:31:54 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 12:12:14 AM
Thor isn't being shot on the field round the back of my house in Newport Pagnell.

Ah man, I HATE it when that happens!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 November, 2009, 12:39:38 AM
Victoria Coren will never be mine.  Curse cruel fate that I married too young (37).  Still, her hair mesmerises.  Let that be enough.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 14 November, 2009, 08:27:20 AM
We just had a hailstorm that set off a car alarm. It sounded like mine, so I jumped out of bed, threw on some clothes and a kagoule (or anorak if you prefer) and rushed outside in the hoofing down hailstones to sort it out. It wasn't my alarm. Typical.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 November, 2009, 08:37:20 AM
I've been up since yesterday 13:00 and there is so much to do and enjoy today that I will be a wee bit tired tonight when I stay up till about 05:00 ish to keep my body clock correct.
Best I stay jabbering on here through the night while I watch films and finish of my unfinished story.
Sleep deprivation, I can't wait ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 November, 2009, 03:39:58 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 14 November, 2009, 12:39:38 AM
Victoria Coren will never be mine.  Curse cruel fate that I married too young (37).  Still, her hair mesmerises.  Let that be enough.
You have my sympathy, TB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 November, 2009, 03:49:58 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 14 November, 2009, 03:39:58 PM
You have my sympathy, TB.

Cheers, Mike.  To be honest some of the sheen went off our putative relationship when her Dad passed away.  I had long imagined electric conversations at the Coren family poker table, while Victoria casually caressed my ankle with her stockinged foot... -sigh-.  Suppose I'll have to settle for true love instead, what a world.  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 14 November, 2009, 04:27:47 PM
This morning I dropped a tattie scone on my Xbox controller and got butter all over it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 November, 2009, 04:34:42 PM
I went for a run, but it wasn't raining.  However, it was so windy that a blue recycling wheelie bin (that some fool hadn't taken in after it was emptied YESTERDAY MORNING) blew over just before I came to it.  Narrowly misssed being hit by it and nearly slipped on the wet leaves underfoot. 

Sigh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 November, 2009, 05:22:29 PM
It's a warzone Mike, so you be careful out there!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 November, 2009, 05:33:46 PM
I am now ringing our favourite Chinese take away to put our order in and the phone is bloody engaged >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 November, 2009, 06:55:33 PM
i too slipped on wet leaves- and fell on my rucksack, and was stabbed in the back by scissors. ow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 14 November, 2009, 07:57:30 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 14 November, 2009, 06:55:33 PM
i too slipped on wet leaves- and fell on my rucksack, and was stabbed in the back by scissors. ow.

Are you ok SBT?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 November, 2009, 08:01:04 PM
yes thanks, only small scissors. it takes more than a small prick to make me scream. ahem. sbt
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 November, 2009, 08:18:52 PM
No decent images of Nemesis available online and those that are available are too small to be of any use.

I will just have to draw from memory instead as i cant be bothered to piss about anymore.Not in the best of moods right now either which doesnt help as i feel naffed off and a little bit aggressive.

And yes ANOTHER wet Sunday.4th in a row now and i have been wanting to do a car boot with a friend and sell of some tat so maybe next sunday or the one after that ?

Fuckshit

GGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRR.............
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 14 November, 2009, 10:09:02 PM
Have their been decent Nemesis covers? (The series was before my time) I'd guess there must have been though. Is there not a covers gallery around somewhere, on here or the much mentioned Barney? I don't know, it's not something I've ever looked for.

Probably not what you're looking for but just a thought.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 14 November, 2009, 10:11:33 PM
Many apologies for the double post but as soon as I hit post on the last one I realised that my idea was probably the first thing Peter tried.  Sorry if it sounded like I  was taking the piss Peter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 14 November, 2009, 10:30:29 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 14 November, 2009, 08:18:52 PM
No decent images of Nemesis available online and those that are available are too small to be of any use.
Quote from: faplad on 14 November, 2009, 10:09:02 PM
Have their been decent Nemesis covers?

Damn right there has!

(http://www.2000ad.org/covers/usreprints/hires/warlock1.jpg)

(http://www.2000ad.org/covers/usreprints/hires/warlock3.jpg)

(http://www.2000ad.org/covers/usreprints/hires/warlock4.jpg)

Now that was how to do reprints.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 10:42:12 PM
Paul WS Anderson wants to do Metal Gear Solid: The Movie.

Fuck off Paul.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 November, 2009, 11:03:05 PM
I went to the theatre tonight and left my gloves on the back seat of the taxi.

We walked home, but there were no gloves to leave anywhere by that point.

The play was '6 Characters in Search of an Author.' Quite enjoyable. After all the time it's taken me to catch up with it I found that it wasn't actually necessary to see it - a read of the wikipedia entry will do - and it didn't seem all that relevant to today despite the company's superb efforts to make it so.

I think Pirandello was onto something clever and original when he wrote it, but the ideas in it have long since entered the mainstream.

There was an attractive and spunky blonde girl in it though and it wouldn't have stretched the imagination greatly to pretend she was Victoria Coren if it should please one to do so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 11:05:43 PM
Seriously, who the fuck actually wears gloves?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 November, 2009, 11:07:24 PM
WIMPS
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SamuelAWilkinson on 14 November, 2009, 11:13:37 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 11:05:43 PM
Seriously, who the fuck actually wears gloves?

Gentlemen of style and taste, dear Godpleton. Perhaps that's why you're not aware of the phenomenon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 November, 2009, 11:22:54 PM
I will let you all imagine they were silk, suede or kid gloves to compliment my top hat and opera cape, and not merely padded winter thermal gloves from George at Asda.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 November, 2009, 09:11:19 AM
Quoteand i have been wanting to do a car boot with a friend

Is this the Brighton version of doggng?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 November, 2009, 12:20:19 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 15 November, 2009, 09:11:19 AM
Quoteand i have been wanting to do a car boot with a friend

Is this the Brighton version of doggng?

No.

A car boot sale involves selling secondhand junk unloaded from the back of a car and the Sunday Market is one of the most well known despite the fact its nowhere near as good as it used to be.Its still worth going to it as it has a high proportion of antiquey type stuff which makes it good for a bargain hunt so i usually go home with something plus its particularly good for secondhand records.

Hope this sorts out any confusion as spying on couples fucking in cars in out of town car parks at night isnt really my thing.




I dont
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 November, 2009, 12:38:33 PM
Quote from: faplad on 14 November, 2009, 10:09:02 PM
Have their been decent Nemesis covers? (The series was before my time) I'd guess there must have been though. Is there not a covers gallery around somewhere, on here or the much mentioned Barney? I don't know, it's not something I've ever looked for.

Probably not what you're looking for but just a thought.

I worked with the 3 covers posted by SS which helped a bit.

I didnt even think of your suggestion but i didnt bother looking because i didnt have the patience to trawl through all the covers.

I got an entry together that is pencilled and i am about to ink it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 15 November, 2009, 12:40:38 PM
My 1 year old boy has the skitters and just dumped a massive wet,runny,lumpy brown load in his nappy. As I went to get the stuff to clean him up he sat on the floor and it all squeezed out the side like stamping on a tube of toothpaste. Thank fuck we have wooden floors and not carpet.

Im still boaking at the thought.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 November, 2009, 12:54:54 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 14 November, 2009, 11:22:54 PM
I will let you all imagine they were silk, suede or kid gloves to compliment my top hat and opera cape, and not merely padded winter thermal gloves from George at Asda.
You have just completely ruined the mental image I had constructed of you and your good lady stepping out of a Hansom at the theatre door, curtains having been held in anticipation of your arrival, the production to be followed by cocktails, dazzling repartee and dancing till dawn.

This qualifies as a minor impediment.
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 11:05:43 PM
Seriously, who the fuck actually wears gloves?
I wear gloves when I'm on my bike. Or when it's cold as I have delicate, nimble little hands.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 November, 2009, 01:06:02 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 15 November, 2009, 12:54:54 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2009, 11:05:43 PM
Seriously, who the fuck actually wears gloves?
I wear gloves when I'm on my bike. Or when it's cold as I have delicate, nimble little hands.

Wearing gloves on a bike is okay for the protection but just for the cold weather, are you a footballer by chance my dear Cosh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 November, 2009, 01:16:47 PM
QuoteI will let you all imagine they were silk, suede or kid gloves to compliment my top hat and opera cape,

Just a tip, HoU, but never go see Mask Of Zorro.  You'd be like a magnet for every Joe Chill/Nicholson Joker wannabe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 15 November, 2009, 03:34:43 PM
I took advantage of today's relatively mild weather to spend half an hour down Cosmeston Lakes with my camera. After taking a few pictures of the swans and ducks, I chanced upon a few squirrels who obligingly let me get close enough to take photographs.

(http://i205.photobucket.com/albums/bb239/worldshown/squirrel1.jpg)

Then some idiot thought it would be funny to sic his dog on the squirrels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 16 November, 2009, 11:00:07 AM
I have, at last count :

1 Emergency Ambulance
1 Police Van
3 Police Cars
1 Helicopter
Shitloads of Coppers
4 Dogs    Not Police Dogs. Just dogs,

all doing whatever it is they are doing right outside the front window.(Except the helicopter of course, which is circling the street)  Bloody noisy, bloody annoying, and I'm bloody curious but don't want to be seen to be taking too close an interest for fear of inciting the ire of whichever chav neighbours has set it all off.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 11:15:29 AM
I hate stuff like that.  I'm sure the semi-regular night-time hellicopter circling that certain chav neighbours of MINE (the ones from Hallowe'en, attentive Gloady-ites) seem to attract is behind my recent bout of nightmares where I'm chased by a helicopter gunship through a burning house watching all my friends and family be burnt to death and shot into bloody chunks.

Not sure why I shared that.  Apart from sharing that nasty little nightmare with you in the hope it'll spread and be less likely to spend it's evenings at MY house.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 16 November, 2009, 11:20:34 AM
How does the gunship get inside the burning house?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 11:30:03 AM
It tends to blow the roof off and bits of wall, causing the fire.  I'll be having a lovely dream with all my mates and family, living and dead, having a great time.  And then BANG the bloody roof comes off and it's death after horrible death.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 16 November, 2009, 11:55:49 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 11:15:29 AM
I hate stuff like that.  I'm sure the semi-regular night-time hellicopter circling that certain chav neighbours of MINE (the ones from Hallowe'en, attentive Gloady-ites) seem to attract is behind my recent bout of nightmares where I'm chased by a helicopter gunship through a burning house watching all my friends and family be burnt to death and shot into bloody chunks.

Not sure why I shared that.  Apart from sharing that nasty little nightmare with you in the hope it'll spread and be less likely to spend it's evenings at MY house.

I don't like that - no more late night cheese sandwiches for you X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 11:58:20 AM
Do you see?

DO YOU SEE WHAT'S HAPPENED NOW?

In trouble for snacking now.  *kicks petulantly at carpet* 'snot fair.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 16 November, 2009, 11:59:34 AM
I can't CONTROL you, I don't want to change you - you're your own person. DO YOU SEE?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 November, 2009, 12:18:20 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 11:15:29 AM
Not sure why I shared that.  Apart from sharing that nasty little nightmare with you in the hope it'll spread and be less likely to spend it's evenings at MY house.

One of my English GCSE students, who is from Brazil, wrote an essay in which she imparts this top tip: if she has a nightmare she turns the pillow over so the bad dream stays on the other side of the pillow and she won't have the same dream again.

Isn't that sweet?  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 16 November, 2009, 12:20:16 PM
That is sweet. Incredibly sweet.

Refreshing to hear something so innocent. I'm smiling.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 16 November, 2009, 01:14:34 PM
had to buy rat pizen
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 01:21:54 PM
A nightmare last night and NOW my IBS is playing up something chronic.  BAH! 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 November, 2009, 01:28:24 PM
I have got some patches of plaster to paint on the outside walls in the yard because there is a small window of dry weather [for once] so of course just as i want to do this the weird Twats who have moved out have come back to collect some stuff from the house next door and parked their cars right up against the wall i want to paint and if they dont get lost very quickly it means i will have to ask them to back the cars away from the wall so i can paint it which i dont want to have to do because i dont want to talk to them.

I thought that they had finally moved out late last week and that was it but now they are back again and i just wish they would fuck off permanently.Ugly wierd people they are.

And now they have locked up and gone off somewhere and left the cars where they are which means i have to paint round them.

Well fuck it i have a job to do and now is the only time to do it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 16 November, 2009, 02:53:51 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 01:21:54 PM
A nightmare last night and NOW my IBS is playing up something chronic.  BAH! 

Why not try a cheese sandwich? That should settle it...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 02:55:53 PM
I dare not.  Wild will be angry.  *tremble*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 16 November, 2009, 03:23:11 PM
Anyone would think I was a terrible, aggresive monster! I'm not - am I?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 04:54:46 PM
You're a hang-gliding cat.  That's not monstrous.  And I was only joking as you well know.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 16 November, 2009, 06:18:25 PM
The world of manipulation Mikey - welcome!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 16 November, 2009, 06:38:26 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 16 November, 2009, 01:14:34 PM
had to buy rat pizen

I bought a mouse trap on Friday and the wee shit has managed to snaffle the grub twice without setting it off!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 16 November, 2009, 06:59:25 PM
My brother's computer is up the spout and I came home today to find that he'd quite obviously been on mine. Don't really mind that, but it's been mysteriously wiped clean - internet history, cookies, etc - all gone. Which leads me to suspect he was using it for pr0n. Yuk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 07:10:07 PM
Yuk.

Once saw a fella in the LIBRARY looking at really quite strong (and possibly illegal) porn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 November, 2009, 03:51:24 PM
Once my friend insisted we spend 2 whole hours in Soho in his quest for porn and he ended up just buying Fiesta from a conventional corner shop. Twat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 17 November, 2009, 03:55:24 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 16 November, 2009, 06:38:26 PM
I bought a mouse trap on Friday and the wee shit has managed to snaffle the grub twice without setting it off!
What bait are you using? Snickers (or Marathon as I insist on calling it) works really well. It's gooey and the little bastards can't steal it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 November, 2009, 04:08:26 PM
Multiple impediments today.

1. Almost forgot my wallet and phone as I left work and had to go back in the building to get them.

2. As I got on the bus to MK I realized I had a red tag from work in my pocket and I wasn't about to make a second trip back. (Don't worry, I won't get sacked, it's just a plastic tag and besides, they fucking love me at work).

3. When the bus arrived in MK I almost left the library book I was reading (PM me if you want to know what it was!!!) on the bus but the driver stopped me in time. Fortunately it wasn't the compendium of Queer Theory essays I also have on the go.

4. Whilst I was in MK I looked in the window at Gamestation and was taken aback by the range of Street Fighter 4 figures they had on display. I very nearly bought an Akuma figure before I came to my senses and I half a mind to get it next time I'm up there. I fear I may be sucked into the realm of buying plastic tat which would make me as lame as Tordelback.

5. An old-ish Canadian guy (I think he was Canadian, he talked very slowly) asked me for directions to a Day's Inn in Little Linford but I couldn't really help him so now he'll spend all night ambling around MK. He'll either freeze to death in Campbell Park or he'll be set upon by feral youths in Downs Barn and it's All. My. Fault.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 November, 2009, 04:08:34 PM
Had a great night driving down to Southampton the other night. It was pissing down on the way there and my offside headlight blew. Once I arrived and checked the trailer to bring back, the load was shot and then on the way back the wipers would only work on fast, BRILLIANT.
Lets just say I had a bit of a headache when I got back.


Still, I'm alive so mustn't grumble
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 17 November, 2009, 04:18:41 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 16 November, 2009, 07:10:07 PM
Once saw a fella in the LIBRARY looking at really quite strong (and possibly illegal) porn.

Surprised he got away with that. Libraries round my way have pretty strict restrictions on their computers. And I mean strict. At one point I couldn't even log on to this place. I remember the first time I tried I got a restricted content warning and about 30 seconds later heard the assistants discussing "who was it?" , "I think it was Paul". Big Brother paranoia kicked in and I left not long after convinced they thought I was looking at porn.

It's not as bad as that now but it's still pretty strict. Though I'm in a new town now and the assistants don't know me by name so I'm alright on that score.

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 17 November, 2009, 04:08:26 PM
5. An old-ish Canadian guy (I think he was Canadian, he talked very slowly) asked me for directions to a Day's Inn in Little Linford but I couldn't really help him so now he'll spend all night ambling around MK. He'll either freeze to death in Campbell Park or he'll be set upon by feral youths in Downs Barn and it's All. My. Fault.

I fucking hate people asking me for directions and it seems to happen all the bloody time. The thing is, even when I've lived somewhere for years I don't tend to remember street names and things. I just know how to get from my house to various places I go to regularly. I don't need to know the names of the steets I walk down to get there. And absolutely no-one will believe you if you tell them you don't know the way to somewhere like a pub or a football ground or something like that but I don't drink so one pubs no different to another to me and I spent 15 years in a town without once having reason to walk past it's football ground and hence, while I knew it existed, I wouldn't have had a clue how to get to it. It also doesn't help that I don't drive so on the rare occasions that I do know the place they're looking for it's the foot route using back alleys and footpaths. Not a clue by road so drivers are bang out of luck. Thing is, I'm the one who feels a prick at the end of the conversation. Bane of my life.

Wow, bit of a rant there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 November, 2009, 05:15:13 PM
Seemingly whenever I'm in Watford I'm asked for directions to the ground.  Football fans don't seem to understand that a person who lives near a ground (or in my case, happens to be in the town centre near one) may have no idea/interest (pick one, it's the same thing to me) where the bloody ground is. 

Whenever I've been asked directions to a pub, I've NEVER been asked for directions to a NICE pub.  It's always a dive known for figths and glassings.  Lovely. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 November, 2009, 05:41:00 PM
Can't be bothered to start "Life fills me with Inertia" so I'll dump NME's top 50 albums of the decade here.
Quote1. The Strokes - Is This It
2. The Libertines - Up the Bracket
3. Primal Scream - xtrmntr
4. Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
5. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Fever to Tell
6. PJ Harvey - Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea
7. Arcade Fire - Funeral
8. Interpol - Turn On the Bright Lights
9. The Streets - Original Pirate Material
10. Radiohead - In Rainbows
11. At The Drive In - Relationship of Command
12. LCD Soundsystem - The Sound of Silver
13. The Shins - Wincing the Night Away
14. Radiohead - Kid A
15. Queens Of The Stone Age - Songs for the Deaf
16. The Streets - A Grand Don't Come for Free
17. Sufjan Stevens - Illinoise
18. The White Stripes - Elephant
19. The White Stripes - White Blood Cells
20. Blur - Think Tank
21. The Coral - The Coral
22. Jay-Z - The Blueprint
23. Klaxons - Myths of the Near Future
24. The Libertines - The Libertines
25. Rapture - Echoes
26. Dizzee Rascal - Boy in Da Corner
27. Amy Winehouse - Back to Black
28. Johnny Cash - Man Comes Around
29. Super Furry Animals - Rings Around the World
30. Elbow - Asleep In the Back
31. Bright Eyes - I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning
32. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Show Your Bones
33. Arcade Fire - Neon Bible
34. Grandaddy - The Sophtware Slump
35. Babyshambles - Down in Albion
36. Spirtualized - Let It Come Down
37. The Knife - Silent Shout
38. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
39. Crystal Castles - Crystal Castles
40. Ryan Adams - Gold
41. Wild Beasts - Two Dancers
42. Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
43. Wilco - Yankee Hotel Foxtrot
44. Outkast - Loveboxxx/The Love Below
45. Avalanches - Since I Left You
46. Delgados - The Great Eastern
47. Brendan Benson - Lapalco
48. Walkmen - Bows and Arrows
49. Muse - Absolution
50. MIA - Arular

What a thoroughly boring list. I hope someone firebombs their offices (Hint hint! Xmas is coming!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 17 November, 2009, 05:52:03 PM
im very pleased to say i own none of them. and havent bought an album in ten years! sbt
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 November, 2009, 05:55:35 PM
I own four.  I loathe nearly EVERY artist involved.  Must be officially old now. 

Of course, I never put any store by the NME so it's possible that I was BORN old. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 17 November, 2009, 06:04:29 PM
Quote from: James S on 17 November, 2009, 03:55:24 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 16 November, 2009, 06:38:26 PM
I bought a mouse trap on Friday and the wee shit has managed to snaffle the grub twice without setting it off!
What bait are you using? Snickers (or Marathon as I insist on calling it) works really well. It's gooey and the little bastards can't steal it.

In the end it was Beauty Fruit and Nut that killed the Beast.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 17 November, 2009, 06:36:31 PM
QuoteWhat a thoroughly boring list. I hope someone firebombs their offices (Hint hint! Xmas is coming!)

There's some good albums immersed in a sea of absolute gash, the NME can fudge RIGHT off
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 November, 2009, 06:42:23 PM
My missus owns four of them 10, 14, 27 & 49 and I own one 30. I bought it just for the one hit single and it only cost a fiver.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 17 November, 2009, 06:48:35 PM
I own 22 of the albums on the list, not sure what that says about me. I do still despise the NME though. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 November, 2009, 06:49:17 PM
I have 8!  Although I believe I only bought 2 of those, and stole the other 6 from the office network iTunes pool, and only have  2 on my MP3 player at the mo (the two I bought).  Does this mean I'm cool?  I mean, obviously not as cool as Gavin, and it goes without saying that I'm cooler than Mike, but I'm not sure that counts as actually 'cool'.  I need validation, and closure.

Honestly though, nothing by Sigur Ros?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 November, 2009, 06:51:10 PM
I own 5 of those albums in that list other than that i am just about done with lists like these and anyway the NME is a travesty compared to what it used to be and it doesnt have any credibility anymore and i stopped reading it when it changed form its newspaper serious format and mutated into the music scenes equivalent of Heat magazine.

No Coldplay though which is a good thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 17 November, 2009, 06:53:17 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 November, 2009, 06:51:10 PM
I own 5 of those albums in that list other than that i am just about done with lists like these and anyway the NME is a travesty compared to what it used to be and it doesnt have any credibility anymore and i stopped reading it when it changed form its newspaper serious format and mutated into the music scenes equivalent of Heat magazine.

Quick! Someone break out the emergency punctuation kit. Peter is crashing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 17 November, 2009, 07:10:36 PM
I own 19 of them - and I still maintain that 'Is this it' is the most over-rated album EVER
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 November, 2009, 07:16:06 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 November, 2009, 06:42:23 PM
My missus owns four of them 10, 14, 27 & 49 and I own one 30. I bought it just for the one hit single and it only cost a fiver.

My missus has just corrected me, she owns number 1 as well ::) she got it for £4 in a sale after one Christmas.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 17 November, 2009, 07:26:15 PM
Drilled through an electric cable today. Going to cost me £100. Bastard.








V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 17 November, 2009, 07:27:48 PM
I own 8 and the lack of numerous other ablums that clearly would be on any decent music papers list makes me vaguely ashamed to own even that many...where is that guilty pleasures list...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 November, 2009, 07:46:05 PM
My brother dropped nearly £300 of his firms money yesterday.  Happily he found it 15 minutes later.  Hole in his pocket.  But that's a minor impediment for me as it may have taken a week off his life-expectancy. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 17 November, 2009, 09:38:33 PM
Crikey! I'll bet he was relieved to find it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 November, 2009, 09:46:03 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 17 November, 2009, 07:46:05 PM
My brother dropped nearly £300 of his firms money yesterday.  Happily he found it 15 minutes later.  Hole in his pocket.  But that's a minor impediment for me as it may have taken a week off his life-expectancy. 

I lost that much cash once because i had a hole in my pocket and didnt realise it.This was somewhere between Green Park and Victoria.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 November, 2009, 10:29:12 PM
He was bricking it because his boss is also his best mate. Most people pay cash for skips. He was fortunate to have got it back, but the fear and worry were quite massive despite only lasting a short time. A few 20s were missing, but compared to how bad it might have been this news was almost welcome.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 18 November, 2009, 12:17:24 AM
Bloody flu has left me stuck in bed for the last few days.

Lucky for me, I've got an array of Kubrick films to keep me happy. On the downside however, I am tripping my tits off on various medicines, making 2001 a much more... dramatic experience.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 November, 2009, 12:32:19 AM
This surely needs a thread of its own! But...

I have four of the albums on that list. I claim no responsibility for The White Stripes CD, and Myths of the Near Future was only an eBay purchase, so cost next to nothing.

14. Radiohead - Kid A
18. The White Stripes - Elephant
23. Klaxons - Myths of the Near Future
38. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 18 November, 2009, 12:42:32 AM
I've got fourteen of those albums and I'm proud of it. In fact, I'll check out some of the others in Spotify as that's where I get to find out about music nowadays and before that it was Last.fm. I am fed up with music radio and gave up on XFM many years ago.

Agree with comments about NME but I do often buy their albums of the year issue to see if there is anything good I missed out on throughout the year. That has introduced me to some gems such as Les Savy Fav. But having said that, last time I didn't discover anything.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 November, 2009, 01:11:52 AM


[/quote]

Lets all list which of those we have then.....You dont have to but i am going to :

PJ Harvey - Stories From The .........

Yeah Yeah Yeahs -Fever To Tell

Blur - Think Tank

The Streets - Original Pirate Material

Spiritualised - Let It All Come Down

Avalanches - Since I Left You

Arcade Fire - Neon Bible

And thats yer lot.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 18 November, 2009, 01:16:09 AM
1. The Strokes - Is This It
3. Primal Scream - xtrmntr
4. Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
5. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Fever to Tell
10. Radiohead - In Rainbows
14. Radiohead - Kid A
15. Queens Of The Stone Age - Songs for the Deaf
18. The White Stripes - Elephant
19. The White Stripes - White Blood Cells
20. Blur - Think Tank
32. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Show Your Bones
36. Spirtualized - Let It Come Down
38. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
45. Avalanches - Since I Left You

It won't go down as a classic music decade though. Can't say there is anything in the list that is really groundbreaking.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bouwel on 18 November, 2009, 09:10:26 AM
QuoteLets all list which of those we have then.....

I have nothing on that list. I'm guessing that says something about me. Possibly.

-Bouwel-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 18 November, 2009, 09:34:05 AM
Here is my list for anyone that is interested:
2. The Libertines - Up the Bracket
4. Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
5. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Fever to Tell
6. PJ Harvey - Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea
7. Arcade Fire - Funeral
8. Interpol - Turn On the Bright Lights
10. Radiohead - In Rainbows
12. LCD Soundsystem - The Sound of Silver
14. Radiohead - Kid A
15. Queens Of The Stone Age - Songs for the Deaf
17. Sufjan Stevens - Illinoise
20. Blur - Think Tank
24. The Libertines - The Libertines
28. Johnny Cash - Man Comes Around
30. Elbow - Asleep In the Back
31. Bright Eyes - I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning
32. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Show Your Bones
33. Arcade Fire - Neon Bible
38. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
39. Crystal Castles - Crystal Castles
42. Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
45. Avalanches - Since I Left You
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 18 November, 2009, 10:27:10 AM
I've got the QOTSA album.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 18 November, 2009, 10:37:38 AM
I was going to say I had none of them as it appears to be a hateful list, and gloat. Then I realised I actually do have the Johnny Cash one. Shit! It's all crap really and depends entirely on your taste surely.
Best album of the decade (for me) is The Cult - Beyond Good and Evil folllowed by Quireboys - This is Rock and Roll. Can't see NME printing that tho :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 18 November, 2009, 11:52:36 AM
Uh fun lists about music!

4. Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
6. PJ Harvey - Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea
9. The Streets - Original Pirate Material
16. The Streets - A Grand Don't Come for Free
18. The White Stripes - Elephant
25. Rapture - Echoes
30. Elbow - Asleep In the Back
34. Grandaddy - The Sophtware Slump

There's a couple of others I probably should own notably the Spiritualized album and ANOTHER Johnny Cash record (actually if this is one of the American recording I do own it I just remember these by number not title) and I've always meant to check out Wilco as all the stuff I've heard by them I've enjoyed.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 November, 2009, 11:54:41 AM
It's the fourth of the American Recordings.  The one with covers of Depeche Mode's Personal Jesus and Nine Inch Nails' Hurt.  Classic.  The rest?  Yawn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 18 November, 2009, 02:14:02 PM
1. The Strokes - Is This It
2. The Libertines - Up the Bracket
4. Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
5. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Fever to Tell
7. Arcade Fire - Funeral
8. Interpol - Turn On the Bright Lights
12. LCD Soundsystem - The Sound of Silver
15. Queens Of The Stone Age - Songs for the Deaf
18. The White Stripes - Elephant
19. The White Stripes - White Blood Cells
23. Klaxons - Myths of the Near Future
24. The Libertines - The Libertines
32. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Show Your Bones
33. Arcade Fire - Neon Bible
34. Grandaddy - The Sophtware Slump
38. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
39. Crystal Castles - Crystal Castles
40. Ryan Adams - Gold
47. Brendan Benson - Lapalco
49. Muse - Absolution

That's my collection, I'm not that sure about some of them...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 November, 2009, 03:24:22 PM
I've just found out that in the same four week period that the housing association is fitting an entire new bathroom and kitchen in our flat, our wonderful subsidised restaurant at work is being refurbished too, so no hot lunches OR dinners.

The flat improvements were the bribe offered if we all voted to be transferred from council-run housing to HA. I voted no, but the refurbs and the avalanche of biased publicity meant the yes camp won. I expect rapid rent increases after 2012.

The food at work by the way is lovely - today I had poached smoked haddock with wilted spinach on a toasted muffin, with sautéed potatoes & onions and cauliflower cheese, all for £2.90. Tomorrow is 'roast day' - beef this week with Yorkshire pud and all the trimmings. yum! Six years of working there has made me fat, but I don't care!

December 09 is going to be the Month of the Sandwich. *sigh*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 18 November, 2009, 03:26:08 PM
Quotetoday I had poached smoked haddock with wilted spinach on a toasted muffin, with sautéed potatoes & onions and cauliflower cheese

*wipes drool away from corner of mouth* Stop it you....you....you PERVERT!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 November, 2009, 05:24:57 PM
??Regarding the above list the majority of those albums i havent even heard and even the artists that were massively hyped like Arctic Monkeys,White Stripes,and The Libertines i have only ever heard one track from each of them.I have never heard anything by any of the other artists listed and without being dismissive i couldnt care less if i never hear anything by them because i am just not interested.It just goes over my head.I only heard a White Stripes track because it was played a couple of times in a club.

As far as i am concerned the last decade that the list covers is the worst decade for music i have lived through and i consider myself to be a music lover.I was blown away by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs because they seem genuine and look like they mean it and its just dirty sounding Rock N Roll music.

I only really listen to back catalogue and i am constantly buying secondhand vinyl.For example yesterday i bought a Bad Company album [self titled album  contains Cant Get Enough] and Gary Moore - Back On The Streets.

I live in a bubble and i create my own reality.By that i mean being out of touch with popular culture.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 November, 2009, 06:58:55 PM
QuoteBy that i mean being out of touch with popular culture.

Peter man, you're in your thirties.  Your 'popular culture' happened 20 years ago.  There's no shame in it.

I scroll through my MP3 player.  With the exception of movie soundtracks, a bit of wigger stuff I quite enjoy for its self-important silliness (Eminem, Streets etc.), some world music, and a lot of Rubin-era Johnny Cash, there's basically nothing on there from after 1991 - the year I turned 20.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 18 November, 2009, 07:33:28 PM
I hope thats an exaggeration and you haven't missed the work of Tom Waits over the last 18 years - he's produced some of his best work!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 November, 2009, 08:35:33 PM
Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 18 November, 2009, 07:33:28 PM
I hope thats an exaggeration and you haven't missed the work of Tom Waits over the last 18 years - he's produced some of his best work!

Ah, point.  I did skip over the Waits section (10 albums on the MP3), probably because I always think of my introduction to him ca. 1990 as coming to an artist already fully formed, even though my favourite album (Bone Machine) didn't come out 'til 1992.  Ditto some of Leonard Cohen's later stuff - The Future, for example, also 1992.  So basically I'm talking shite when it comes to artists who had already won my heart by the time I was 20.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 18 November, 2009, 10:11:52 PM
As far as I'm concerned the best music was in the late sixties and early 70s. There was tons of dodgy popular music back then, but the better stuff was groundbreaking. I don't like 80s music though I did at the time. I have no time for it and I'm not at all nostalgic about it at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 November, 2009, 10:46:56 PM
I'm pretty broad in my music from 50s to current, with 70s and 90s being the probable front running decades. This past decade has tailed off pretty strong for me. What i HAVE enjoyed hasn't troubled the charts that much. Must be getting old.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 18 November, 2009, 11:16:30 PM
I would advise people to peruse through Wire's top 50 albums as there will inevitably be something you haven't heard in there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 November, 2009, 12:06:50 AM
Surprised to find I only have about a dozen of these. Even more surprised to see XTRMNTR as high up as number 3 as, personally, I'd rate that the best album on the list. Although not the best of the decade.
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 November, 2009, 06:49:17 PM
Honestly though, nothing by Sigur Ros?
That made me think. Then I checked and Agaetis Bryjun came out in 1999! Three years before Is This It, which I would've sworn was years older. Surprised Takk didn't make it. Incidentally, Is This It and White Blood Cells are probably the last albums I borrowed from a mate and taped. Neither fits onto one side of a C90. Think I might start writing a blog about my life through the medium of cassette tapes.
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 18 November, 2009, 01:16:09 AM
It won't go down as a classic music decade though. Can't say there is anything in the list that is really groundbreaking.
Of course, those two sentences have no real connection... I don't think it's been a bad few years for music. Like most people, the stuff I liked when I was a teenager will always hold a special place in my heart but I do still get out and listen to a lot of stuff. Since I was in my early twenties, I've found my interest flagging every few years but, so far, there's always been something that's come along and blown the cobwebs away. Most recently it was Fuck Buttons, whose gleeful mixture of techno and noise would make a corpse dance.

I always found the NME too mainstream anyway. Bring back Melody Maker (two letters printed, Buttonman.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 November, 2009, 12:10:08 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 18 November, 2009, 11:16:30 PM
I would advise people to peruse through Wire's top 50 albums as there will inevitably be something you haven't heard in there.
Cheers Roger. I couldn't find that(if it exists) but they gave me a free download of a track from the new Ben Frost album which is something I've been looking forward to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 November, 2009, 12:29:25 AM
QuoteI always found the NME too mainstream anyway. Bring back Melody Maker (two letters printed, Buttonman.)

When I started reading MM in 2000 (shortly before it was cancelled) it was well shit. They put Limp Bizkit on the cover and gave the album like 4 stars.

Oh, and I meant the Wire's annual top 50 list.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 November, 2009, 12:36:22 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 November, 2009, 12:29:25 AM
When I started reading MM in 2000 (shortly before it was cancelled) it was well shit. They put Limp Bizkit on the cover and gave the album like 4 stars.

Oh, and I meant the Wire's annual top 50 list.
Well, I haven't bought a music paper since 1995 or thereabouts. Didn't it go all glossy like Kerrang towards the end? It was shit then.

I will check it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 November, 2009, 08:43:04 AM
Today's impediment is a crick in the neck that's lasted three or four days. Particularly bad this morning. Getting out of bed was a nightmare. Ow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 19 November, 2009, 10:28:13 AM
I have no such cricks. But I do have a particularly bad hangover. The silly season is officially upon us. Well, me, anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 19 November, 2009, 04:43:14 PM
That shouldn't be an impediment fester - just a reason to drink more to kill the hangover. Silly season, indeed.

Indeed... ;D.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 November, 2009, 09:06:14 PM
... Because family bloody commitments means that I'm highly unlikely to make it to Thought Bubble this weekend.

At least I know about it in advance this time, I suppose.

*Deep Sigh*

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 19 November, 2009, 09:53:10 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 17 November, 2009, 07:26:15 PM
Drilled through an electric cable today. Going to cost me £100. Bastard.



It cost me £130 smackers in total and apparently I just shaved a gas pipe as well. How lucky. Fucking old houses.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 19 November, 2009, 10:29:26 PM
Went to the shop, selected goods, went to till, no wallet, put goods back, left shop, tripped over dog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 November, 2009, 10:47:10 PM
Double bah!  My Bahrain gig now moved back to January.

Actually this is pretty good because it means I don't have to use up the last of my annual leave from work

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 19 November, 2009, 10:51:26 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 19 November, 2009, 10:29:26 PM
Went to the shop, selected goods, went to till, no wallet, put goods back, left shop, tripped over dog.
Your misfortune did have the redeeming feature of making me laugh out loud. Every cloud and all that  :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 November, 2009, 11:00:21 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 19 November, 2009, 10:29:26 PM
Went to the shop, selected goods, went to till, no wallet, put goods back, left shop, tripped over dog.

This is clearly a health and safety matter.

There should be a clearly designated area in which to leave Dogs lying on the floor that is a minimum of 8.5 feet away from the entrance.It should also be within a safe distance from moving cars and parking spaces.

Clear signposting and notices need to be in place as well and they should also be multilingual.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 20 November, 2009, 01:29:39 AM
My sleeping pattern has descended into utter chaos.

I sleep during the day, I'm awake all night, I'm tremendously ill, and ... urgh.

Blast, bah, and buggeration.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Nap Normal on 20 November, 2009, 06:12:20 AM
I've discovered that my ears for no apparent reason have decided to start sprouting hairs... Noooooooo!!! And on top of this awful awful discovery I've put my back out playing tennis. So I'm now walking around bent double with hairy ears. On the bright side the Mrs has given me a couple of days off from the washing up...Woohoo!!! I did ask her If she could be with someone who suffers from hairy ears she said "yes dear of course I will still love you" but she did seem to be packing up all her belongings when she said this!!!I bet she going to leave me for one of these smooth hairless eared guys who can stand up straight with out shouting "arrghh my Bast*rd back" :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 November, 2009, 07:46:59 AM
Christov man, you have it bad.  But face it, your woes pale in comparison to Mr. Normal... hairy ears, feck!

The thing that annoys me about Early Onset Aural Hirsuitism is how much it hurts to pluck the buggers, leaving one with trimming as the handiest option, and thus daft ear stubble.  And no, while I am liberally covered with hair from crown to toe, face included, hairy ears are the one thing I will not stand for.  Not in my 30's, anyway.  A line must be drawn - this far, and no further.  For now.

I wonder is there a lady product that might help?  Or a lighter?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 20 November, 2009, 02:54:47 PM
Neck still bloody knackered.  BAH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 20 November, 2009, 03:23:21 PM
Still got this horrible, horrible cough after two bloody weeks now. Feeling doubly rundown because I'm not really sleeping as a result.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 20 November, 2009, 07:34:06 PM
I've got a sore arm with a big red lump on it from my swine flu jab yesterday and because I'm special I have to go back and have another in 3 weeks time - WIN! as I believe the youth say
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 20 November, 2009, 07:48:33 PM
No hang-gliding for a day or two, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 20 November, 2009, 08:22:41 PM
Or deep sea diving  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 November, 2009, 08:31:53 PM
Had a call for a survey earlier from 'Mike' and I said how long will it take. He said 2 mins and I said okay (mistake). 6 minutes later I said how much longer and he said not long. When we got to 11 minutes I said enough is enough mate and said I'm hanging up. He just kept repeating the next question until I did hang up.
I went to back to doing what I was doing, relaxing. Less than 1 minute later he rang back and said we haven't finished to which I replied well I have and hung up again.
Now I don't mind doing a phone survey but when I am told it'll take 2 minutes and I'm still on nearly 10 minutes after that I get angry I don't like being lied to especially when it wastes my valuable relaxing time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 November, 2009, 08:39:47 PM
Quote from: Christov on 20 November, 2009, 01:29:39 AM
My sleeping pattern has descended into utter chaos.

I sleep during the day, I'm awake all night, I'm tremendously ill, and ... urgh.

Blast, bah, and buggeration.

I am having the exact same problem.

Because i am temporarily unemployed i have already lapsed into being semi nocturnal by going to bed in the very early hours and its very difficult not to because i am naturally nocturnal but tonight i am going to make an effort to try and go to sleep a bit earlier.

*

I had a spam call just now about claiming compensation or writing off credit card bills .That kind of thing.When i picked up and heard what it was i clicked the receiver down to cut them off but i couldnt get rid of the call because when i picked up again the automated spam call was still going.I tried another half a dozen times and i was forced to wait for the call to end before i got a dialling tone again.

This is a bit of a liberty because i didnt ask them to call and secondly when i hang up on a call i expect to get a dialing tone immediately.

I find this to be invasive and persistant in the extreme.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 November, 2009, 11:05:09 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 20 November, 2009, 07:46:59 AM
Christov man, you have it bad.  But face it, your woes pale in comparison to Mr. Normal... hairy ears, feck!

The thing that annoys me about Early Onset Aural Hirsuitism is how much it hurts to pluck the buggers, leaving one with trimming as the handiest option, and thus daft ear stubble.  And no, while I am liberally covered with hair from crown to toe, face included, hairy ears are the one thing I will not stand for.  Not in my 30's, anyway.  A line must be drawn - this far, and no further.  For now.

I wonder is there a lady product that might help?  Or a lighter?

I'm actually thinking of asking for one of those nose/ear clipper things for Christmas -  and I never thought that would come to pass!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 November, 2009, 11:08:41 PM
That's what wanking non-stop for 30 years will do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 November, 2009, 03:28:05 AM
Whenever i go to the shops and the Deli along the road at lunchtimes they are always packed out with bloody Brighton college kids buying filled baguettes and rolls for lunch.This is a pain and i wish they would all just piss off and eat school dinners or packed lunches on the college premises instead.

That Belgian pinched faced BuildABurger dickhead who has been declared as EU president is annoying as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 21 November, 2009, 12:59:37 PM
I hurt my right thumb last night which means no Xbox for a few nights. For some reason the Mrs sees this as a plus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 November, 2009, 09:15:07 PM
I've just spent ages looking for my list of Foundry Workshop figures that I need, as when I bought the first bunch of packs way back in 2004 they sent me an invoice which I kept. This tells me how many packs I bought that time and saves me checking each bloody figure off their website so I can order the rest for Christmas, now they are reduced.
Would you credit it, the list was in the draw of unopened figures ::)

Anyway I now have to order packs 5 to 9 at a total of £120 compared to £200, not bad at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 November, 2009, 01:47:16 AM
What a night ::)

Sam has been ill sice Friday evening and we went to the doctors with him and he prescribed something (the missus knows what), we then went and got it before the chemists shut.
Today he layed on the settee all day and slept most of it and when we took him to bed I made his futon part of his bunk bed up for him and placed a bucket by his head. About twelve'ish these twats woke me up outside yapping (I'd been coughing all night as well) so I decided to get up and watch some stuff.
Less than five minutes later I heard Sam coughing hard, so I went to see if he was okay. As soon as I stood on the bottom stair I smelt the sick, (great) thank God I made the futon up.
About 40 mins later everything was cleaned up and he's sleeping on my side of our bed which means I will have to squeeze in next to him about 05:30 when I go back to bed.
I must admit the wife did all the cleaning up while I just watched coughing but I gave her support!
He seems a lot better now as I think the bug came out with the vomit (that's my medical opinion anyway).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 22 November, 2009, 09:06:36 AM
Sophie was vomiting through Friday night/ Saturday morning and then was right as rain, go figure?
Must be something going around.
That gave me a long day yesterday as I didn't get home until 8 last night from work.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 22 November, 2009, 09:50:25 AM
The spoils of my eBay victory won't be leaving Hong Kong until tomorrow, even though it's been at their bloody post office for 5 days already.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 November, 2009, 12:26:46 PM
I had a meeting last week to discuss my new job. On the positive side, the salary, pension, perks and promotion prospects are all excellent. Very nice working environment, only 15 miles from home, flexible working hours and great employees' facilities on site.

On the negative side, for the first year it's a project I suspect no-one else wanted to do, and they still haven't made me a firm offer regarding salary. They're still having to mull over which end of the £2,000-wide pay band to offer me, for a graduate post, when I've had 5 years' postgrad training, 3 postgrad qualifications and 6 years' employment in areas substantially related to the one I'm to be employed in.

It's all very well to be given the sales pitch that the salary isn't everything because the pension contributions and job security are great, but if I were to accept £2,000 less than the top of the pay band I'd be down £50,000 over the remainder of my working life, and the pension contributions which go with that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 November, 2009, 01:29:43 PM
As I've recently discovered while dealing with the grievances of people leaving our company involuntarily (i.e. being made redundant), company pension scheme contributions aren't worth snot unless you're actually planning on (or absolutely certain of) retiring from that company.  In this jurisdication anyway.

Pension Companies are fast climbing my personal Racket league table of state-mandated thieves, alongside perennial fave Insurance Companies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 November, 2009, 01:42:59 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 November, 2009, 03:24:22 PM
I've just found out that in the same four week period that the housing association is fitting an entire new bathroom and kitchen in our flat, our wonderful subsidised restaurant at work is being refurbished too, so no hot lunches OR dinners.

the good news is that the work in the flat has been out off till after Christmas. The bad news is it's because there may be asbestos present (despite the fact that they already checked for this once). They're due to come back to check more thoroughly in a couple of weeks - if any is detected, grud knows what that'll mean disruption-wise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 November, 2009, 01:48:48 PM
When I'm being told "don't worry about only being paid x because you'll get great pension contributions on top of that," my response is "yes, but not only is x + £2,000 more than x, but the pension contributions on top of x + £2,000 are going to be that much greater."

The bottom line - my salary - is my main concern, and any pension benefits don't compensate for low salary so much as they enhance higher salary.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 22 November, 2009, 04:47:30 PM
...because, at about eleven o'clock last night I started to feel a bit crappy. At 11.30 I was projectile vomming down my bog- and this didn't stop until 5.30 this morning! My insides are now strained to absolute hell, and I was left dry-retching for two hours as my stomach turned over and over. I now have a splitting headache, every muscle aches from straining and I have only just now managed to hold down a piece of dry toast and some electrolyte powder. If that stays down I may try for a cup of tea at six.

As a result, I've had to take today, tonight and tomorrow morning off work- which I can't afford to do. So some of those "bargains" I found last night on the Net for te kids for xmas will have to be forgotten.

I am very pissed off.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 November, 2009, 07:28:16 PM
I have two days off work. I also have the squirts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 November, 2009, 07:31:26 PM
I think the forum has given us all a virus as I'm sat here with a Beechams. After last nights fiasco with Sam I seem to have been infected as my head is throbbing and I keep coughing. Best of all when I went to bed this morning I had the shivers and I was under 3 quilts in the end, now that was shit >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 22 November, 2009, 07:46:23 PM
Whilst Jermaine Defoewas serving three match ban, I swopped him for Darren Bent in my fantasy league team. I didn't realise he was back this week so I didn't swop back. He's just scored five against Wigan.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 November, 2009, 07:47:05 PM
I stubbed my toe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 22 November, 2009, 07:59:55 PM
Bum gravy is a distinct possibility in my near future....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 22 November, 2009, 10:20:02 PM
There's a "Best of Snow Patrol" out.  It's 2 discs.

1. They've been around for five mintes.
2. TWO discs?  What, one track per disc?

The record buying public really depress me sometimes.  If ever a band deserved to be a one hit wonder it's .... Coldplay.  But Snow Patrol are in secnd place.  Awful.  Put me in a grumpy mood now....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 22 November, 2009, 10:43:29 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 22 November, 2009, 10:20:02 PM
There's a "Best of Snow Patrol" out.  It's 2 discs.

1. They've been around for five mintes.
2. TWO discs?  What, one track per disc?

The record buying public really depress me sometimes.  If ever a band deserved to be a one hit wonder it's .... Coldplay.  But Snow Patrol are in secnd place.  Awful.  Put me in a grumpy mood now....

They've actually been around since the mid-nineties but were only signed to a major record label in 2003. I only know this 'cos I read up on them when doing this...

http://malcolmkirk.deviantart.com/art/Snow-Patrol-Comic-Strip-135453606
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 November, 2009, 10:43:47 PM
Just checked for you Mike and it's 15 tracks per disc, lucky you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 22 November, 2009, 10:45:49 PM
They've been around for 15 years, each one of them producing aural torture or the soundtrack to ovulating 30-something's wedding dances - I guess it depends on how you look at it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 November, 2009, 11:07:40 PM
I dont get snow Patrol either as i just find them dreary.

They were signed to Fiction Records which was the Cures record label.At the time they were signed i knew Chris Parry [really just an aquaintence]who was the owner of Fiction records and they were signed just to make money as they were riding on the wave of all that Coldplay rubbish that was popular at the time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 November, 2009, 11:33:50 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 22 November, 2009, 10:20:02 PM
There's a "Best of Snow Patrol" out.  It's 2 discs.

1. They've been around for five mintes.
2. TWO discs?  What, one track per disc?

The record buying public really depress me sometimes.  If ever a band deserved to be a one hit wonder it's .... Coldplay.  But Snow Patrol are in secnd place.  Awful.  Put me in a grumpy mood now....

I thought I liked 'em based on the duet "set the fire to the third bar" which was all over the telly a couple of years ago, so I bought the album.

Turns out it's Martha Wainwright I like!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 22 November, 2009, 11:57:48 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 22 November, 2009, 10:43:29 PM
They've actually been around since the mid-nineties but were only signed to a major record label in 2003. I only know this 'cos I read up on them when doing this...

http://malcolmkirk.deviantart.com/art/Snow-Patrol-Comic-Strip-135453606
Yeah. You couldn't go to a gig in Glasgow between 1996 and 2002 without the tedious fuckers appearing on the bill somewhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 November, 2009, 09:06:46 AM
I get 2 days off work and yesterday I have been feeling shit, headache nausea and shitting water. Went to bed about 7 last night and this morning I am still feeling shit but at least I can fart now without following through.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 24 November, 2009, 07:45:39 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 November, 2009, 11:33:50 PM
I thought I liked 'em based on the duet "set the fire to the third bar" which was all over the telly a couple of years ago, so I bought the album.

Turns out it's Martha Wainwright I like!

It just shows how great Martha Wainwright is that she made that song, not only bearable, but honestly, quit enjoyable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 November, 2009, 07:49:51 AM
Managed to get through a nights work feeling okay and now that I'm home I feel shit again. Pass me that Beechams :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 24 November, 2009, 08:47:16 AM
Gah!  You poor beggar!  Get well soon mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 November, 2009, 03:07:57 AM
Goddamnit.  Sprog appears to be finally sleeping for long stretches, miracle of miracles, and I can't get to sleep myself.  Whiskey it is, then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 25 November, 2009, 12:17:08 PM
My dad used to put whiskey in my bottle to get me off to sleep.  Without it I'd average 1 hour of sleep per 24 and spend the other 23 crying for no reason.  It was that or my mum had another nervous breakdown....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 25 November, 2009, 09:51:42 PM
The bath mat moved as I got into the shower this morning causing me to clatter my leg hard against the side of the bath. I now have an enourmous blue bruise which hurts like mad. Fudging bath mat  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 25 November, 2009, 10:45:38 PM
I'm now 6 Progs behind.  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 26 November, 2009, 08:44:54 PM
My mum's best mate popped round to see how I was.  Once inside and tea in hands, she burst into tears for ages.  Two hours pretty much.  I'm still in bits myself as she died at the beginning of October.  But of course, me being me, I had to be strong and gee her up (she's done lots for me and the family in general over the years).  Her visit was prompted by sorting through stuff in her spare room.  Several months back she'd picked up a fistfull of DVDs she'd lent my mum to watch from her bed.  Upon opening the bag, she found a card from my mum telling her not to worry and she'd miss her.  This must have been a good long while before she became seriously ill.  Upon seeing that, I burst into tears myself. 

Spoke to the doctor the other day about my memory.  Apparently this is "to be expected" given how shite my life is right now and my underlying depression (three years and counting - whoop!).  I've taken to carrying a little notebook with me everywhere like my old dad did towards the end - this helps to knock the memory problems on the head somewhat. 

My phone is so small and slim (recent upgrade, first in four years) that I can no longer find it.  And none of it's beeps are as loud as my poor ears require.  Stupid bloody technology, I don't care if idiots have deafened themselves - MAKE IT LOUDER!  Grrrrr.

Enough minor impediments I think to qualify as spuggage actually.  On the upside my missus posted a wicked entry in the short story competition here which seems to have gone down well - and she's got an even BETTER idea to come.  And she's being lovely.  So not all bad.  Hence impediments, not spugs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 November, 2009, 09:58:43 PM
Keep your chin up, our lad, you're pointing in the right direction - only way through any kind of depression is to keep going forward, one foot after the other.  Anyway, if you don't keep your head up you're liable to be brained by that hang-gliding kitten. 

(I've had to do the notebook thing for several years now, and I've not got anything resembling your excuse).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 November, 2009, 10:42:10 PM
What can I say, Mike? That was a very moving story. In November two years ago my mum went through what you're going through now and it was terribly hard for her. I started scanning 60 years of my grandmother's photographs as a family archive for fear of the collection being broken up, but two years later I'm hardly any further on with it and the original pictures are with four different family members.

I too am going to have to start carrying a small notebook around with me - although by the time I do I may not need it so much, as I'll not be teaching much longer, and most of my forgetfulness, missed deadlines and broken promises arise from sleep deprivation and my teaching duties (requests for paperwork from mangers and admin, and requests from students: will you read this for me, will you make another copy of that thing you brought in 3 weeks ago when I wasn't there, will you mark that homework I handed in the week before that?).

Another thing that's come out of my teaching practice is, through having to teach stuff about atypical psychology and therapeutic techniques, I've learnt a lot myself. I want to start keeping a log of my moods, diet, activities and morose thoughts. Partly because it's narcissistic to do so, and that's always favourite with me, but also because if I can plot this on a graph or spreadsheet it'll help me see the negative bias in my thinking and give me a more realistic idea of the ratio of 'good' days to 'bad' days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 November, 2009, 10:46:20 PM
Oh, and having got back to minor impediments, I had to take two buses today because I was travelling by train to and from the station, and not by car. On the bus I noticed a sign which read "please do not open this window - it interferes with the atmospheric controls" - in other words, just sit tight and put up with it being warm and stuffy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 26 November, 2009, 10:48:06 PM
I would classify a window as an atmospheric control. Or it's your fault Weather Control's still fucked thirty years after the Apocalypse War.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 26 November, 2009, 10:50:09 PM
Next time SMASH ALL THE WINDOWS!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 November, 2009, 10:54:48 PM
I recall a time I was working in a hot, stuffy computer suite in June at Cardiff University and I opened a window and I got verbally rebuked by the stoney-faced, matronly lady who was on monitor duty: "don't open the windows - you'll interfere with the air conditioning," to which I replied "well, I wish somebody would."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 November, 2009, 11:01:31 PM
Not having adequate ventilation in a bus or whatever is a health hazard .

I took a bus 2 years ago in the winter that was dripping with condensation with no ventilation and i caught a horrendous virus.It was during the kind of weather we are having at present.Its what you do if your car is steamed up inside.

How do you get rid of condensation ?

Open a window.

Stupid fucking morons.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 November, 2009, 11:04:32 PM
The old people and the chav yobs in hoodies complain if you open a window. Even in July.


I did open the ceiling vents on a National Express bus last month on which the air circulation had broken down. People were quite relieved and grateful then. No old people or chav hoodies among the passengers though, you see.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 November, 2009, 11:13:02 PM
You can never win as common sense doesnt prevail.

People are a liability and a pain and the less time i spend in their presence the happier i am.

The bus trip i talked about put me off bus travel in winter permanently and as it was only within the locality of Brighton i would rather cycle instead as its healthier and cheaper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 November, 2009, 11:24:07 PM
I had to go on a fool's errand today. By train. A 4-hour journey each way for a 2-hour meeting to discuss setting and marking GCSE research-based coursework, when I'm leaving my job before Christmas and I'm not even going to be setting and marking the coursework this year. Oh well. Somebody had to be there to keep the exam board happy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 27 November, 2009, 07:58:59 AM
minor impendiments

we had our steam shower room delivered, the brochure said 146cm wide, 200 cm long. the box said 146&200cm the email said 146&200cm.

but they all forgot to mention you need 156 and 210 cm to actually install it!
now they offering us a different model and will only deliver next week.

the really annoying thing is, we built in a Jacuzzi first, if they had told us we have built it after they installed, and it would have fit!
(yeh this will go under life is drokkin fantastic next week i admit it.)


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 27 November, 2009, 10:59:54 AM
Gosh, DD - life's hard...(!)

;-)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 27 November, 2009, 11:13:32 AM
DD gets less sympathy than the other impediments  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 November, 2009, 08:12:47 PM
I got the missus to get me the Terminator Salvation Blu-ray today (I like explosions, what can I say) anyway I thought I'd check it out before I watch it tomorrow. Could I get it to play, could I fuck. I then noticed a card in the box which says 'To ensure the best possible viewing experience, your Blu-ray disc player may need a firmware or software update. Blah, blah, blah'. The machine is only less than 3 months old and was one of the latest models in the shop where I bought it!!!! So already it's out of date ::)

What a carry on, I connected to the net and it took a couple of attempts to sort it out but Jesus Christ on a bike what's all this about. Once the info was downloaded the machine then said 'Do you want to upgrade now?' What, so it thinks I farted about doing all that to not upgrade, YES....


I can see a lot of bods on Christmas morning being in for a shock with this disc. Had no trouble with my other few discs or the one I had arrive for the missus today as she's been watching Take That at Wembley, to see if she and her mates are visible. Why can't life be simple!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 November, 2009, 09:00:16 PM
CF, that's another reason why I shan't be "upgrading" to BluRay. That and the following:

1. What's wrong with DVD?
2. Come to think of it, what was wrong with VHS?
3. I'm 39. My eyes aren't good enough to reliably pick my wife out in a room of people, so what on Earth would be the point of "High Definition" pictures?
4. My tv is shit.

I spent the entirety of my teens watching nth generation VHS copies of illegal horror films, foreign porn and old episodes of Dr Who that you had to squint and nod your head at the same speed as the picture was rolling AND read a transcribed script at the same time, to even have half a chance of following the plot... and I loved it. Why are people suddenly so obsessive about "clarity of picture". Transformers in HiDef BluRay Cinema sound is still absolute bollocks. Zombie Flesheaters on Phillips Video 2000 on a portable is still brilliant.

Steev
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 November, 2009, 09:40:26 PM
Where does the technology go next after Blu-Ray ?0

Once a format has reached the level of BluRay discs then there isnt really anywhere else for it to go.The capitalists will find some way to extract more cash from your pocket because its bigger and better than before.

So whats next a fully immersive holographic experience or films that you plug yourself into ?

Personally i couldnt give a toss as DVDs are adequate and its just more bits of plastic to spend money on thats pointless.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 27 November, 2009, 09:46:27 PM
When VHS came out no one knew what was round the corner, so anything is possible.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 November, 2009, 10:36:05 PM
The thing about BluRay, is that it's patently a last-ditch effort on behalf of the "entertainment industry" to screw people out of the very last remnants of their cash, making them pay YET AGAIN for the same films they already have on VHS and DVD. The format has been squeezed into this theoretical gap between the last years of DVD and the onset of the download age. Within a few years, everyone will receive their media via download- tv, movies, music, the lot. We will store them in purpose built "entertainment libraries" (home-based hard drives, rebranded to create demand, with interfaces sold to us along the same lines as BluRay/ DVD is now, with the accent on the latest one being the most desirable.) It will be the hard drives, the interfaces and the screens we watch them on that will fullfll our need to physically "own" items- while our increasing reliance on limited physical storage space, as we exist in smaller and smaller dwellings, coupled with vague notions of them being "greener" (no plastics, etc) will make them the "must-have" of the second part of the 21st century.

BluRay is temporary, and will go the same way as the Laserdisc. Very, very quickly and very soon.

By that time, no one will be watching tv linearly- we'll all have content made available to us at the same time, and we'll download it whenever we like. There won't be any "tv schedules".

I'll still be printing out my weekly 2000AD though- and bagging it.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 November, 2009, 11:47:42 PM
QuoteThere won't be any "tv schedules".
A great post SBT, but I don't agree with this last bit - the hated internet phenomenon of posting "First!" when a web-cartoon or popular blog updates suggests to me that schedules will remain in the download age, even if only to mark the time at which a given download becomes available.  Eastenders fans, footie fans, Lotto junkies, all will still want to be there the moment something becomes available - and this point will probably represent a peak in downloads. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 28 November, 2009, 12:04:00 AM
I made a hilarious joke on another thread and no one complimented me on it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 28 November, 2009, 06:46:02 AM
it will be all downloads next gen. thats almost certain.

as for life impediments,i forgot to charge my itouch!which resulted in a boring journey to work without a prog or a megazine in site!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 November, 2009, 06:52:33 AM
Quote from: Devons Daddy on 28 November, 2009, 06:46:02 AM
as for life impediments,i forgot to charge my itouch!which resulted in a boring journey to work...

This truly is one of the horrors of the modern age. I drive work jeeps a lot during the day, and or reasons that escape me none of them have (working) radios, so I depend on my MP3 player for my fragile sanity - looking down and seeing that red battery indicator instills a feeling of near panic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 28 November, 2009, 08:16:41 AM
A kid just called to the door selling aftershave and woke me up. He was very persistent and every time i tole him I wasn't interested he just lowered the price. I ended up putting the aftershave, that he had arranged in my hallway back into his bag and shutting the door. It's too early for this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 28 November, 2009, 08:29:58 AM
Quote from: Gavin_Leahy on 28 November, 2009, 08:16:41 AM
A kid just called to the door selling aftershave and woke me up. He was very persistent and every time i tole him I wasn't interested he just lowered the price. I ended up putting the aftershave, that he had arranged in my hallway back into his bag and shutting the door. It's too early for this.

What you let him get in!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 November, 2009, 09:14:55 AM
If he'd started doing that sort of thing I think I'd have called the police and reported an intruder.  Watch him pack up his OWN shite in record time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 28 November, 2009, 09:35:28 AM
Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 28 November, 2009, 08:29:58 AM
What you let him get in!

I didn't. He was stood at the door and just started placing them inside at my feet. I was sleep deprived and slightly hungover so my reaction to him were slow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 November, 2009, 09:40:21 AM
You should have shut the door and kept the goods that he had left for you as gifts ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 November, 2009, 01:55:03 PM
I would have allowed him a very generous 5 seconds to leave the premises or i would have physically removed him myself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 November, 2009, 02:22:17 PM
I think we're going to see a lot more of this sort of thing in the future: more pushy salespeople, more petty crime and more portfolio working whereby people put in hours and hours of preparation time and foot-slog for a measly few quid in return. At the moment it's the credit crunch recession that's forcing people (me included) into these pathetic niches of partial employment, but it won't end should the economy ever pick up.

If there ever is another boom, automation, digital communications and the search for efficiency savings will almost certainly mean a reduction in the size of the workforce, leaving a lot of people left out, trying to scratch a living from work that doesn't need to be done, or else supporting themselves through crime, annoying the rest of us and making our lives more difficult into the bargain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 November, 2009, 10:23:36 PM
This morning, I wasted my few hours off this week looking for a decent coat.  My current raincoat was secondhand to start with, and I've been wearing it for bike an bus commuting, long hours of fieldwork, hiking and sailing for 8 years now and it has more taped-up holes and tears than material (I call it 'breathable fabric'), so I thought that if I could choose a new one it would be a good sensible Christmas pressie from the wife in lean times.  Holy crap, am I out of step with reality.  Unless I wanted the plastic equivalent of a Fremen Stillsuit, or something on which I could actually pull the seams apart with a  yank (I feel no remorse, I was saving the next man a disappointment) , the damn things started at €200 - and went up.  The first one that I checked the price tag on was €340!  In the words of the Jerry Springer Musical, what the f**king f**king f**k.

And yet, the three outdoor shops I visited were full of staff, and full of customers, merrily consuming, so it's clearly me that's got the problem.   I've never spent €200 on an article of clothing in my life, suit I wore to my wedding included, and there's f**k all chance I'm going to start at the moment.  I expect a holiday, or a party, or game console or something for that kind of money - not a shagging coat.

Looks like I should have just grabbed a plastic sweatbox one from Lidl, and spent the morning with the kids.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 28 November, 2009, 10:24:34 PM
Not quite a 'Life Spugs' entry, but I went back to being a commuter last week. Man, the rush hour crowds on the tube! Something else. The idea of being stuck in one of those crowded trains in a tunnel fills me with dread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 November, 2009, 10:28:19 PM
The most I have ever spent on a coat was at an American PX in Garmish on a skiing jacket for £150 back in 1993, Teflon coated and all that bollox. Still have it now.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 28 November, 2009, 10:48:51 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 28 November, 2009, 10:23:36 PM
This morning, I wasted my few hours off this week looking for a decent coat.   

Shop online for one TB. The large online retailers will often have decent kit from previous years going cheap. It won't be in the latest colour (oh no) but it's surprising how much you can save on some really good technical gear. I always do this with my mountain bike kit as well, saves a fortune.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 November, 2009, 11:10:52 PM
Thanks Kerrin, didn't really expect advice, was just moaning about my wasted time, but I think I'll do just that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: satchmo on 28 November, 2009, 11:33:48 PM
I just moved house and put all my comics into storage. 15,000 of the bastards. Even my Tarots :) Who let me buy so many? My back hurts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 09:23:50 PM
I'm being PERSUED and HARRASSED by ladybirds, hundreds of the damn things! It's winter, where the buggery chuff are they all coming from?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 November, 2009, 09:45:30 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 09:23:50 PM
I'm being PERSUED and HARRASSED by ladybirds, hundreds of the damn things! It's winter, where the buggery chuff are they all coming from?
That's weird - like some kind of biblical plague. You haven't recently stolen an ancient scarab from a pre-colombian temple or anything have you?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 29 November, 2009, 10:06:28 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 November, 2009, 09:45:30 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 09:23:50 PM
I'm being PERSUED and HARRASSED by ladybirds, hundreds of the damn things! It's winter, where the buggery chuff are they all coming from?
That's weird - like some kind of biblical plague. You haven't recently stolen an ancient scarab from a pre-colombian temple or anything have you?

Ooo, ancient curses are bleedin' horrible in the winter, but I think you can get a cream for it from Boots or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 10:09:36 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 November, 2009, 09:45:30 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 09:23:50 PM
I'm being PERSUED and HARRASSED by ladybirds, hundreds of the damn things! It's winter, where the buggery chuff are they all coming from?
That's weird - like some kind of biblical plague. You haven't recently stolen an ancient scarab from a pre-colombian temple or anything have you?

*pats self down* nope, no scarabs or ancient treasures about my person - BEGONE FOUL LADYBIRD PLAGUE!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 29 November, 2009, 10:22:13 PM
I was looking through the bookshelves and I saw my copy of Nozick's Anarchy, State & Utopia that I bought for £20 in 2005. I just went in there (Ottakar's/Waterstone's MK) and just bought it. These days I would hesitate for at least three minutes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 November, 2009, 10:30:38 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 09:23:50 PM
I'm being PERSUED and HARRASSED by ladybirds, hundreds of the damn things! It's winter, where the buggery chuff are they all coming from?

I have been having the exact same problem with Flies.I must have counted about 50 yesterday and the day before there werent any.They were all congregating on the window inside and werent responsive to movement so i used the hoover to suck them all up.Today there was about 20 that went up the hoover as well.

NO idea where they all came from either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 29 November, 2009, 11:01:19 PM
Peter & Wild,

Isn't it obvious?

They don't HATE you.  They have identified you as their god.  Give them tasks (such as fetching platters of freshly caught wild Cheeseburgers or similar) and they will experience religious bliss by serving you. 

However, it will mean that you must spend eternity with them and listen to their insect songs of adoration on crudely built bug-harps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 November, 2009, 12:29:51 AM
Quote from: wild-seven on 29 November, 2009, 09:23:50 PM
where the buggery chuff

So wrong, and yet so very right. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 November, 2009, 03:53:56 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 29 November, 2009, 11:01:19 PM
Peter & Wild,

Isn't it obvious?

They don't HATE you.  They have identified you as their god.  Give them tasks (such as fetching platters of freshly caught wild Cheeseburgers or similar) and they will experience religious bliss by serving you. 

However, it will mean that you must spend eternity with them and listen to their insect songs of adoration on crudely built bug-harps.

If all i can do is attract flies then i dont know why i even bother.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 30 November, 2009, 12:23:39 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 29 November, 2009, 11:01:19 PM
Peter & Wild,

Isn't it obvious?

They don't HATE you.  They have identified you as their god.  Give them tasks (such as fetching platters of freshly caught wild Cheeseburgers or similar) and they will experience religious bliss by serving you.  

However, it will mean that you must spend eternity with them and listen to their insect songs of adoration on crudely built bug-harps.

So how does this ladybird song go then Mike? *eagerly awaits bug symphony* I found one on the cooker this morning - maybe it likes porridge?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 30 November, 2009, 01:04:03 PM
I don't know.  I don't speak bug.  Porridge?  I know next to nothing about their dietry habits.  And if I don't know, then surely NOBODY does. 

Perhaps you should ask a university for a research grant and investigate these questions - especially if, as seems likely, they're determined to live in your house.  You should make SOME money out of these unwanted lodgers and I've got a grant from UCL to investigate their language.  Bugs aren't known for paying rent as the spiders in my bathroom prove every month.  They just look at me when I ask them where the rent is.  Not a lick of shame about them either.  Bloody bugs....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 30 November, 2009, 01:11:20 PM
Ahem, ahem. I ask politely now that all of you cease this bloody rude talk about my cousins. Larybirds are entirely good-looking little beetles and I have been known to easily crush on them. And spiders, loathsome as they are, can be nice enough fellows when their bellies are full.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 30 November, 2009, 01:24:11 PM
They're perfectly pleasant, they just don't pay any effing rent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 30 November, 2009, 02:33:33 PM
Quote from: locustsoflove on 30 November, 2009, 01:11:20 PM
Ahem, ahem. I ask politely now that all of you cease this bloody rude talk about my cousins. Larybirds are entirely good-looking little beetles and I have been known to easily crush on them. And spiders, loathsome as they are, can be nice enough fellows when their bellies are full.

I rather like ladybirds, actually creepy crawlies in general - I spend a lot of time scooping them up into a dish and putting them outside. I just wish there weren't so many of them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 30 November, 2009, 03:01:16 PM
Ladybirds, bizarrely can be deadly. Back in the hoooottttt Summer of errr I think it was 1996, the one when I worked at West Kirby library if that helps any???? Anyway sometime around then there were real life swarms of ladybirds on the Wirral, and elsewhere I imagine. Anyway this bloke was chased by a swarm and had a heart attack.

I've tried to find a link to confirm this as as I typed it I realsied it sounded more and more like an urban myth but it was the talk of the penisular back then for a day or two... I think...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 30 November, 2009, 03:18:36 PM
That's similar to what I experienced one year while visiting friends in Texas (or as we Northerners - the true 'yanks' - refer to it, Tex-ass).

There were some big storms all summer long, and quite a deal of flooding. Apparently my inferior cousins, crickets, thrive in this kind of weathern and swarmed madly all over San Antonio. Wherever we went, in stores, malls, gas stations - wherever - crickets covered the ground like a moving blanket. All you could do to walk out the door was step on them and crush them. It was awful, crickets dead and alive everywhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 30 November, 2009, 04:21:16 PM
The summer you're reffering to, Colin, I was an assistant scout leader and was helping look after a bunch of young scouts and cubs on a group camp on the south coast somewhere (I forget, there were so many) when the entire place was literally mobbed with the bastards.  This does happen, I thought it myth until then too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 30 November, 2009, 04:44:32 PM
People who come to interviews, then decline your job offer as they are going back to university. Seriously, this has happened to me 3 times now. Why bother coming along and wasting time if you dont want the job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 30 November, 2009, 04:50:30 PM
I remember that at school/college/university they always told us to get interview experience when possible.  That doesn't mean you apply for jobs you've no intention of taking up if offered though. 

Prats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 30 November, 2009, 07:52:49 PM
Bugger! My shoulder cleared up well enough for me to drive down to Yorkshire and back (six adults in the magic bus!) but then on Sunday, Mrs Tips gets me chopping wood and cleaning gutters and I only go and put my back out.  Absolutely shooting agony down my left leg whenever I twist or turn. ("Don't twist or turn, then")
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 November, 2009, 08:33:45 PM
Phew !!!

I am glad thats over with  !!

I have just finished an argument/debate with THE worst deranged brainlocked lunatic from hell on another forum.Impossible to reason with.That was unprecedented in all my 3 yrs spent online.This included my first death threat.

Quite remarkable.

I had to draw a line under it and finish it in the end because it was wasting my time but if you think Scott is unreasonable or over the top then you have no idea.

There were lots of very very long ranting posts that were like Essays and lots of replies to himself that were long esssays.

I didnt want to post this really but i felt like i had to offload it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 November, 2009, 08:44:35 PM
Nearly died this morning on the M2. I was passing a foreign lorry (you can guess what happens next) on the climb up to junction 3. I always look across to check what these buffoons are doing, due to past experiences of seeing them in various states including eating a noodle dish, watching an action movie and being asleep.
Well this one looked awake and so on I went, I reckon my trailer was over half way past his cab when he decided to indicate and pull out straight into the side of me. Luckily I had checked the two outside lanes (another thing I do when overtaking a foreign vehicle) and they were clear. So I was able to swerve out of his way and slam the brakes on. He suddenly realised what he had done and flashed to say sorry (I presume) as he swerved back into the slow lane!
All in all just another day on our roads with foreign drivers who are a menace in the south east. The worst junction for this stuff is the M20 joining onto the M26, a death trap if ever there was one!
Anyway I'm alive, so I class that as a minor impediment ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 30 November, 2009, 08:50:03 PM
PETER: JESUS!

I've had SEVERAL death-threats.  One notable one on IMDB over five years ago (before I stopped posting due to morons like him).

Sweet Cheeses, there's more than ONE of them?  Crazy.  

Offloading this sort of thing is what this thread is for, dump away.

JOHN: That's utterly terrifying.  I don't know what to say.  The awful thing is people like that are on the roads right now, nearly killing lots of other people.  Let's hope it stays at "nearly".  I felt sick just READING that.  Brrrr.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 November, 2009, 09:15:45 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 30 November, 2009, 08:50:03 PM
PETER: JESUS!

I've had SEVERAL death-threats.  One notable one on IMDB over five years ago (before I stopped posting due to morons like him).

Sweet Cheeses, there's more than ONE of them?  Crazy.  

Offloading this sort of thing is what this thread is for, dump away.

JOHN: That's utterly terrifying.  I don't know what to say.  The awful thing is people like that are on the roads right now, nearly killing lots of other people.  Let's hope it stays at "nearly".  I felt sick just READING that.  Brrrr.

Idiots on the roads.Idiots on forums.Idiots everywhere.....

What i will say about what i was dealing with is that this individual was aggrieved about something which was the Police in the US and if ever there was a candidate who was going to go postal with a loaded firearm then this was it.He was definately unbalanced and irrational and i dont say that as a throwaway comment.There was something very serious going on with this individual and the majority of his comments were baseless accusations and stuff that he was projecting onto myself.

I wont go into any more but lets say that he was warned off in no uncertain terms and all his text has been cut and pasted and filed away and of course he is traceable by IP address.

BBBrrrrr....

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 December, 2009, 12:17:28 AM
It sounds like someone is eating all of the croissants I bought.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 December, 2009, 12:30:11 AM
SHUT THE FUCK UP, CAT.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 December, 2009, 03:52:43 PM
Damn! Just been informed that the school Christmas Fair is this Wednesday 18:00 - 20:00. How and I gonna get my arse on the chatroom when I have to leave for work at my new time of 21:00. Life is so cruel sometimes ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 December, 2009, 06:18:14 PM
Just take a laptop along and sit grumpilly by Santa's Grotto typing away!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 December, 2009, 08:06:01 PM
The wife's Take That Circus Live CD arrived today, for Christmas and I have to listen to it tonight at work to make sure it's okay. I just know I'll end up singing along with some songs :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 December, 2009, 11:41:33 PM
Quote from: James S on 30 November, 2009, 04:44:32 PM
People who come to interviews, then decline your job offer as they are going back to university.

That's mental! Depends what the job is I suppose. Last time I went back to university it was because it paid better than the job I was doing at the time, if you can believe it. Ordinarily, wild horses wouldn't drag me there. Again. In the current economic climate it seems like quite a reckless thing to do to choose education over employment. Many of my current GCSE students are only there because they've recently been made redundant, and they're worried about the future.

When students of mine tell me they're getting qualifications because they want to go to university, I worry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 December, 2009, 01:21:47 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 01 December, 2009, 11:41:33 PM
Quote from: James S on 30 November, 2009, 04:44:32 PM
People who come to interviews, then decline your job offer as they are going back to university.

That's mental! Depends what the job is I suppose. Last time I went back to university it was because it paid better than the job I was doing at the time, if you can believe it. Ordinarily, wild horses wouldn't drag me there. Again. In the current economic climate it seems like quite a reckless thing to do to choose education over employment. Many of my current GCSE students are only there because they've recently been made redundant, and they're worried about the future.

When students of mine tell me they're getting qualifications because they want to go to university, I worry.


It doesnt seem that reckless to choose education over employment especially if there isnt any employment but  i guess it depends on what subject and course they are choosing to study and wether it was the right choice because if its not then two or three years down the line they will look for employment and find that their qualification or degree is useless so they wont be any better off and in actual fact they will be worse off because of student loans and all the rest.

Anyway i always thought that you had to get qualifications to go to University.

Also i see professional posts advertised that are in my sector of work that require a very high standard of education to degree level and beyond that i cant apply for because i dont have any qualifications or degrees or anything.

These posts pay roughly 25,000 - 30,000 PA which isnt a very good financial return for years and years of study and quite honestly i am glad i never bothered with further education.I dont regret it at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 December, 2009, 04:15:30 PM
Don't! Put! Images! Into! Word! Before! You! Send! Them! To! Me! Argh!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 02 December, 2009, 04:18:43 PM
Quote from: Banners on 02 December, 2009, 04:15:30 PM
Don't! Put! Images! Into! Word! Before! You! Send! Them! To! Me! Argh!

What do you mean, there's a charge for the artwork? I already did it for you -- didn't see the file "brochure.xls" ...?

*shudder*

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 02 December, 2009, 10:06:07 PM
My girlfriend bought me two tickets to see Monster Magnet. I texted my mate - who I'd already mentioned the gig to - to offer him the spare, and the replied that he'd just bought two tickets to see the New York Dolls on the same night, with the intention of giving me his spare! Gah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 December, 2009, 11:10:24 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 02 December, 2009, 01:21:47 PM
It doesnt seem that reckless to choose education over employment especially if there isnt any employment

Whoah! Back up there, dude. I said choosing education over employment, not unemployment.

Quotebut  i guess it depends on what subject and course they are choosing to study and wether it was the right choice because if its not then two or three years down the line they will look for employment and find that their qualification or degree is useless so they wont be any better off and in actual fact they will be worse off because of student loans and all the rest.

Yep - that's why it's advisable to do a vocational course rather than an academic one. It rather defeats the point of what a university is and makes it a terrible waste that they changed all the polytechnics to universities in 1992, because every university's a polytechnic now.

QuoteAnyway i always thought that you had to get qualifications to go to University.

Yes, and...? Some of my students are taking GCSEs because they want to go to university. I worry for them because they have been sold a pup, and I worry about what's waiting for them at the end, and what it's going to cost them, not least in terms of what they might be giving up to get a degree just like every other school leaver's.

Quotequite honestly i am glad i never bothered with further education.I dont regret it at all.

Rather makes my argument for me, doesn't it? i.e. university's a reckless gamble if the payoff isn't great and doing a degree means forgoing employment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 December, 2009, 04:50:07 AM
QuoteYep - that's why it's advisable to do a vocational course rather than an academic one. It rather defeats the point of what a university is and makes it a terrible waste that they changed all the polytechnics to universities in 1992, because every university's a polytechnic now.


Mmmm-hmmm.  It's this gap in expectations that's the source of much woe.  'University' has become an almost-expected continuation of your school years into your 20's, leaving this huge question mark over where exactly somebody goes if they (a). want to learn practical vocational skills; or (b). want to develop academic chops (of whatever stripe).  Even twenty years ago my crankiest most demanding lecturer used to refer to Freshers as 'Seventh Formers', and he wasn't wrong.  

Ob. minor impediment:  it's 4.50 am and  I can't finish editing this bloody report.  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 December, 2009, 05:14:55 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 03 December, 2009, 04:50:07 AM
Ob. minor impediment:  it's 4.50 am and  I can't finish editing this bloody report. 
Yup. Minor impediement here too. It's 5.15am and just finished work for the night. G'night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 03 December, 2009, 04:33:14 PM
Just failed my driving test. Not in a killed a person way or I'll never do this kinda way but in a ho hum maybe next time. So strangely feeling more confident about my driving.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 03 December, 2009, 04:50:51 PM
They say all the best drivers fail at least one test.
Thats what they told me on my 3rd test anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 December, 2009, 05:29:50 PM
It's a pain, Colin, but If I'd passed my driving test the first time I would have been a very scary driver.  Despite having the mechanics and maneuvering down pat I had no real appreciation of road-sense or the value defensive driving.   In the few months in between first and second time I got a few lessons from a sane driving instructor (a big improvement over the first guy, who used to use me to pick up and deliver groceries to various family members) and actually worked at the important things - how not to kill anyone, mainly.  Best thing that ever happened to me, although I didn't think it at the time.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2009, 06:37:16 PM
Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 03 December, 2009, 04:33:14 PM
Just failed my driving test. Not in a killed a person way or I'll never do this kinda way but in a ho hum maybe next time. So strangely feeling more confident about my driving.

As hard as it may sound but the best way to pass is to relax and try to not get so wound up about it being an actual test. Like I said it's hard to do but that's the best way, honest.
Good luck for your next test Colin!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2009, 07:33:51 PM
My book from Mongoose arrived today and the postie woke me at 12:50 after 1 hours sleep, which was nice. I've had a quick scan through it and it looks fine but now I have to hand it to the wife to wrap for Christmas. £25 from the Book Depository, can't go wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 03 December, 2009, 08:01:09 PM
Been feeling terrible all day, runny nose, shivering and aches all over.

My computer got a nasty virus last night. In the end, I resorted to restoring it to its original state and so, I've spent all day reinstalling all the software I had.

On the bus home from town today a very drunk man started swearing at me for no reason at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2009, 08:25:45 PM
Quote from: Gavin_Leahy on 03 December, 2009, 08:01:09 PM
On the bus home from town today a very drunk man started swearing at me for no reason at all.

I bet that made the ride extremely uncomfortable. Do you say "please can you stop that" and get into an argument or do you ignore them, only for them to take offence because you are ignoring them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 03 December, 2009, 08:42:42 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2009, 08:25:45 PM
I bet that made the ride extremely uncomfortable. Do you say "please can you stop that" and get into an argument or do you ignore them, only for them to take offence because you are ignoring them!

I just put in my earphones and tried to ignore him. He moved on to insulting someone else after that. Through it all though, he never once raised his voice and said it all in a hushed manner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 December, 2009, 09:41:43 PM
Quote from: Gavin_Leahy on 03 December, 2009, 08:42:42 PM
Through it all though, he never once raised his voice and said it all in a hushed manner.

Oh keriste, they're the worst ones.  I once got stuck opposite one of those on the crowded night train from London Euston to Holyhead.  To escape, I put my head on the table and pretended to go asleep, whereupon he started debating with himself in the same angry half-whisper whether he should smash his bottle into my skull or not.  It's a long way to Wales.

Hope you feel better soon Gavin - must be a bad one if you managed to infect your computer too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 December, 2009, 10:23:00 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 03 December, 2009, 05:29:50 PM
It's a pain, Colin, but If I'd passed my driving test the first time I would have been a very scary driver.

What he said. I am a much better driver for not having passed my driving test first time. Or second time, come to that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 December, 2009, 12:59:45 AM
I reopened the scab on my shin and now there's blood all over my sheets.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 December, 2009, 02:41:34 AM
Deadbeat absent students meant I had to fill in 20 withdrawal forms before leaving work today, meaning 2 hours of unpaid overtime, when I've got lots to do, a big weekend planned, sleep to catch up on (it's 2.40am) and a bus to catch tomorrow at 12.30pm.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 December, 2009, 02:44:13 AM
It's at least 6.5 hours before I can have a showerbath.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 December, 2009, 12:08:34 PM
Why would you waste crumpets on mini pizzas?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 04 December, 2009, 06:22:06 PM
I have my Internet on (obviously)- and have ONLY this board up at the moment. I just loaded a page, and my computer said- and I quote- "Oh my god, no way!". In a little, tinny, squeaky voice.

This disturbs me!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 December, 2009, 08:14:46 PM
There's a weird tacky substance on the edge of my mousemat. Either the gel wrist bit's burst or it's a very misplaced wank.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 December, 2009, 01:27:37 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 04 December, 2009, 06:22:06 PM
... my computer said- and I quote- "Oh my god, no way!". In a little, tinny, squeaky voice.

It's one of those sidebar adverts for stupid talking smileys.  Drives me mad too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 05 December, 2009, 09:29:35 AM
The Forces family are off to the 'Romney Hythe and Dymchurch Railway' today, to go on the Santa Ride. Anyway I thought I'd better clean the car up and hoover it out and all the little things you need to do, every 5 years.
Well just to make my day start well the windscreen jets were a bit weak so I cleaned them up with a pin but alas that didn't help, so I lifted the bonnet (hood for our US cousins). What a laugh, the rubber tube that joins a 'Y' connector to the two nozzles was corroded. I then had to shorten it so I could rejoin the bugger. Lets just say a small job became a 'FUCKING' big job as the rubber tube dissapeared into the bonnet. My fingers are too big to slip into gaps like that but after much forcing and blood escaping from them I managed to do it. Life is strange like that.
Anyway we can now pick up Granny and Grandad and be on our way, whoopie do!

All this because of Santa, Damn you Santa!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 05 December, 2009, 11:04:21 AM
Bah! near fight with p8ssed up chums in a restautrant.never good... :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 05 December, 2009, 11:19:32 AM
(http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg86/ToadyCat/simpsons_nelson_haha2.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 05 December, 2009, 11:21:10 AM
 ;D

I was doing my Rab C Nesbitt impression hands on hips slutrring every word
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 05 December, 2009, 03:53:50 PM
Blast! I can't find my paints at all today, which is a complete shame considering I meant to start finishing up my advent calendar entry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 December, 2009, 09:33:54 PM
I had a fantastic night out in London but after the coach ride home, the driver - who was in a hurry to make up lost time after an unscheduled stop in Newport because he'd picked up two passengers for Newport by mistake - threw all the luggage compartment doors wide open and dragged all the luggage out, leaving bags from the side luggage hold on the paved area of the concourse and bags from the rear compartment in a big puddle in the road so he could get all the compartments closed as quickly as possible and hand over to another driver.

When I went to retrieve my luggage from the rear hold the driver shut the door on my head as I bent down to pick my bags up where he'd chucked them. The bigger of my two rucksacks was quite wet, either from being dropped in a puddle in the time it took for me to get off the bus and round to the back, or from water sloshing around in the boot (I didn't get a chance to see inside). When I got home I found the brunt of the flood had been borne by my dry clean only, vintage, tailored dinner jacket, which was absolutely wet through.


That's National Express, folks. Remember the name. In the future, now that I can afford it, I may switch from bus to rail travel for long trips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 05 December, 2009, 11:35:48 PM
National express is the stuff of Nightmares.

I havent been on a National Express coach for at least 15 years perhaps even 20.

Not for me thanks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 December, 2009, 05:54:30 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 05 December, 2009, 11:35:48 PM
National express is the stuff of Nightmares.

Catchy tune, though. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiBI3A2WcrE

Living in a country that systematically destroyed its once excellent rail network, and having a job that required me to move all round it but didn't pay enough to buy a car, I spent most of my 20's on coaches.  They are without question the vilest form of transport known to man.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 December, 2009, 09:40:25 AM
Seconded.

Although given the lack of difference in quality and the MASSIVE difference in price, if I *have* to go by coach (and I generally do) then I'd take Megabus anyday. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 December, 2009, 12:05:07 PM
Never had any problems with Megabus, and price is definitely a factor in our choice, but lately it's been National Express because of ticket availability - National Express has been cheaper for the trips we've made this year and has run more services at convenient times. Rail, though horrendously priced, is still much more comfortable and I don't have to sort my bags ahead of time into stuff I need for the journey, stuff I don't need for the journey, and stuff I may never see again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 December, 2009, 01:45:55 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 06 December, 2009, 05:54:30 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 05 December, 2009, 11:35:48 PM
National express is the stuff of Nightmares.

Catchy tune, though. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiBI3A2WcrE

Living in a country that systematically destroyed its once excellent rail network, and having a job that required me to move all round it but didn't pay enough to buy a car, I spent most of my 20's on coaches.  They are without question the vilest form of transport known to man.

The Uks rail network as it is is pretty good and is extensive but then if you compare the existing rail network to how it was before the Beeching cuts then its incredible how much of it has been lost.

I dont know how much of the original netwrok is left but in this area you can still walk along the abandoned lines and tunnels etc.Really it should all be brought back into service and whats more it could be done very easily as mostly it would just involve relaying track but you wouldnt expect a commonsense idea like that from the Morons in govt but i am surprised that it hasnt been proposed anywhere.

You can see a lot of the old lines marked on Ordnance Survey maps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 December, 2009, 01:53:48 PM
Don't you know Peter. In the future they will tarmac those old tracks and then they will become private roads for MP's and their cohorts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 06 December, 2009, 01:56:18 PM
You ever do a seemingly straightforward job that ended up getting epic?
We bought a Christmas tree yesterday. Brought it home, stood it up in its bucket in the hall.
To make room for the tree, I pulled out two seats from the bay window, to discover the wall and floor behind the seats were covered in grim black mould. Cue a trip to the shops to stock up on a variety of bleach-based mould-killing agents and chemical weaponry, followed by several hours of moving furniture around, cleaning walls, floor tiles and the window frame.

The mould has now been eradicated and the tree's in, but it looks like I've been burgled. The rest of today will feature housework. Lots of housework.

Also, Virgin have cross-patched my telephone line (previously working fine), and some other bloke has been receiving calls intended for me since Wednesday!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 December, 2009, 01:58:16 PM
Most of the former railway lines round my way have housing on them.  And, to be honest, Stanmore doesn't need it's old BR station back, the Jubilee Line does well enough.

But then, this is the outer suburbs of the capital - land is at a premium and transport links round here are pretty ace - in smaller towns and cities and especially in the country the transport is so bad and this suggestion of yours, Peter, is a good one if the lines are still mostly unoccupied.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 December, 2009, 02:08:37 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 December, 2009, 01:53:48 PM
Don't you know Peter. In the future they will tarmac those old tracks and then they will become private roads for MP's and their cohorts.

I read about some new offices that are being created or a refurbishment of existing offices for Peter Mandelson @ the cost of 13 - 15 million.

GGGRRRR.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 December, 2009, 12:17:29 AM
My hands are dirty and it's ingrained so I'm like Lady Macbeth, only I'm mental, a bitch and I like making mud pies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 December, 2009, 11:51:15 PM
Those Gamestation ads are fucking lame.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 December, 2009, 11:16:02 AM
the first workman arrived at QUARTER PAST BLOODY SEVEN this morning. They're removing asbestos from the kitchen today, and the full kitchen/bathroom refit has beenb put off till early Jan, so I've got about a month and a half of disruption and mess ahead. Oh joy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 December, 2009, 11:48:00 AM
I was so shagged last night that when I sat at the dining room table in front of this, in the wee hours, my head spent most of the time in contact with the aforementioned table. I eventually managed to wake myself enough to crawl into bed :-[

I had so many things to do but alas that's life!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 December, 2009, 11:56:23 AM
Got the carpenter round to work on the stairs. Already he's propped open his toolbox against the brand new wallpaper and balanced his saw, teeth down, along the top of the newly-glossed skirting board, also resting against the brand new wallpaper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 December, 2009, 12:00:14 PM
I have a feeling that that carpenter is going to visit a freshly dug patch of earth in your garden soon HoU. Just don't let on to the police that he was at your house when the search begins for him ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 11 December, 2009, 12:00:41 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 11 December, 2009, 11:56:23 AM
Got the carpenter round to work on the stairs. Already he's propped open his toolbox against the brand new wallpaper and balanced his saw, teeth down, along the top of the newly-glossed skirting board, also resting against the brand new wallpaper.

Well isn't that what we all pay these people for? To fix five things and break two?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 December, 2009, 08:31:53 PM
The latest edition of SFX arrived in the post today all creased and slightly torn, in fact it was so creased that two creases appeared on every fucking page.
Anyway due to there being hardly any mentions of 2000AD or Dredd material in the mag this year I have decided to bin my renewal in January. I'm sick of reading about Dr Who all the time (saying that I don't read about 90% of the stuff now).
I nearly binned it last year but the subs people rang me up and made me an offer I couldn't refuse. Well this year I will refuse as I can't take it any more!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 December, 2009, 10:45:43 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 December, 2009, 08:31:53 PM
I'm sick of reading about Dr Who all the time (saying that I don't read about 90% of the stuff now).

I don't read SFX regularly any more, but I got the recent "sci fi of the 21st century" special - about half of it seemed to be unquestioning fawning over Who - I think I may finally have had enough of this mag. (PS if anyone wants 2 of the 3 free gifts, just PM me - I'm happy to give away the crappy Star Trek mousemat and the double-sided Firefly/Lord of the Rings poster, but the calendar will be in my kitchen for the next 12 months)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 December, 2009, 01:37:09 AM
I suppose this belongs in the fictional "Life doesn't do much to upset my personal inertia" thread but as I was looking through the "humour" section in Waterstone's (I was looking for "Stuff White People Like") I saw a Acme Novelty Library volume in there. Of course it's entirely possible that another customer chose not to put it back properly but it's more likely that no one who worked there  to peruse the contents to more correctly identify it in "Graphic Novels".  I didn't buy it because it didn't even have a proper price label. Nor did I put it in Graphic Novels because I don't work there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 December, 2009, 05:30:34 PM
I have a debilitating cold, but I still did three shifts at work this week, stayed up late to prepare, had the carpenter round to fix the bannister, and have in-laws visiting. Good job the missus was up to the task of tidying up despite being ill herself. If it'd been my own family popping in I'd have told them to skip it because we're in no state to receive visitors.

Anyway, I've a very agreeable glass of Jacob's Creek Shiraz Cabernet to amuse me and the guests are no trouble at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 December, 2009, 05:47:49 PM
Had a fun filled drive last night. Stuck in a traffic jam on M25 just before M11 for an hour, slowly moving (two cars in a collision in the contraflow). Then after junction 25 hit another jam which shut the motorway (later on) but eventually passed the scene of destruction about 2 hours later (a car had gone up the back of a trailer, looked like a fatal to me) I managed to get my 45 minute break in lane 2 whilst I was waiting, which helped.
Then up the M1 there was a car on it's roof and the someone being treated by the medics at the roadside (luckily I got past this one before they could close the road).
Let's hope tonight there are some better drivers out there!
These were minor to me but obviously the worst thing possible to the poor people involved.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 12 December, 2009, 06:03:42 PM
All three of the kids next door AND their stupid aggressive effing dog are shrieking, barking and swearing while I'm trying to wathch the Return of The Magnificent Seven.  Goodbye atmosphere....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 December, 2009, 06:07:58 PM
About an hour ago i got the end of a cotton bud stuck right inside my ear so i went up to A+E which is 10 minutes walk around the corner from my house.I only had to wait 15 minutes before being seen by a gorgeous nurse who was very friendly to the point of being flirtatious.

MMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmm..........



Anyway because of this and that i have to wait until monday morning to have this object sucked out of my ear by a specialist.

Such is life.............

I had exactly the same thing happen when i went to the tax office and talked to the attractive Black woman about my tax affairs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 December, 2009, 06:10:48 PM
Did she smack your wrist and tell you that you shouldn't put those in your ears?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 12 December, 2009, 06:11:09 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 December, 2009, 06:07:58 PM
I had exactly the same thing happen when i went to the tax office and talked to the attractive Black woman about my tax affairs.


Surely sticking cotton buds in your ear isn't the thing to do when talking to a tax officer, attractive or otherwise????!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 12 December, 2009, 06:15:05 PM
I had the same thing when I was in hospital with potentially life-threatening testicle woe.

Or at least, in my morpheine-addled mind I did.  I can remember her face clearly as she whispered about my vital signs being rather worrying and attempting to get ecg pads to stick to my hairy, masculine chest. 

Sadly I think she may have forgotten about me by now.  But I'll never forget her..... *sigh*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 December, 2009, 06:23:46 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 December, 2009, 06:10:48 PM
Did she smack your wrist and tell you that you shouldn't put those in your ears?

She did say the "Never stick anything bigger than ....." thing but i explained it was because of "swimmers ear" and the itching and she was saying she has had the same thing herself before and understood how hard it is not to scratch inside the ear.


Quote from: Colin_YNWA on 12 December, 2009, 06:11:09 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 December, 2009, 06:07:58 PM
I had exactly the same thing happen when i went to the tax office and talked to the attractive Black woman about my tax affairs.


Surely sticking cotton buds in your ear isn't the thing to do when talking to a tax officer, attractive or otherwise????!!!!

I could have worded my comment a bit better but it was the flirtatiousness i was refering to.

I still cant believe i was in and out of A+E in half an hour if that because i was dreading being stuck up there for hours.............
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 December, 2009, 06:59:43 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 December, 2009, 06:23:46 PM
She did say the "Never stick anything bigger than ....." thing

Me! Me! I know! Is it 'a fist' ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 12 December, 2009, 07:00:39 PM
Elbow. 

That also applies to your mouth.  Unfortunately..... *wink*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 December, 2009, 10:05:20 PM
If it is smaller than your index finger don't stick it in.








V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 11:33:42 AM
Off to my niece's christening, which is partly nice since I get to see my niece, and partly intensely irritating because I will be nagged incessantly as to why my kids haven't been inducted into the cult-du-jour.  I would note that my brother and sister-in-law are of different religious backgrounds, are both agnostic and had a 'humanist' wedding ceremony, but they feel a baptismal cert (of any type) is important.

It's not like I'm not teaching my kids about religion, I mean how many three-year olds can name the three wise men (Note: not in the Bible) and Zeus' elder brothers?  Possibly I've gone too far calling Jesus 'one of the gods many people think are real'.  I'm a pretty big fan of Jesus-as-represented-in-the-Gospels as it happens, I just don't think he was the son of some type of god.

My mother's typically penetrating point is that I'm foisting the 'burden' of difference on my children.  Apparently I could throw my own kids in to today's proceedings as a job lot, and that would fix everything.

I'm starting to feel like one of those bastards who refuses their kids transfusions or antibiotics because of their own beliefs.  Still, there'll be mince pies afterwards, and I haven't had one yet this year.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 December, 2009, 12:18:15 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 11:33:42 AM
I mean how many three-year olds can name the three wise men (Note: not in the Bible)

Um... let's see now: Balthazar, Melchior and... Athos? Porthos? Prancer? Dancer? Bashful? Erm...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 12:29:29 PM
Gaspar (the friendly Magus), of course.  Now, can anyone help out with the third of the three Fates, Atropos, Clotho and...?

I walk past a statue of them every day, and can I remember the third?   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 13 December, 2009, 12:46:06 PM
(http://home.online.no/~groennsl/baltazar/overskrift2.gif)






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 13 December, 2009, 01:04:19 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 12:29:29 PM
Gaspar (the friendly Magus), of course.  Now, can anyone help out with the third of the three Fates, Atropos, Clotho and...?

I walk past a statue of them every day, and can I remember the third?   

Lachesis?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 December, 2009, 01:08:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 11:33:42 AM
Off to my niece's christening, which is partly nice since I get to see my niece, and partly intensely irritating because I will be nagged incessantly as to why my kids haven't been inducted into the cult-du-jour.  I would note that my brother and sister-in-law are of different religious backgrounds, are both agnostic and had a 'humanist' wedding ceremony, but they feel a baptismal cert (of any type) is important.

It's not like I'm not teaching my kids about religion, I mean how many three-year olds can name the three wise men (Note: not in the Bible) and Zeus' elder brothers?  Possibly I've gone too far calling Jesus 'one of the gods many people think are real'.  I'm a pretty big fan of Jesus-as-represented-in-the-Gospels as it happens, I just don't think he was the son of some type of god.

My mother's typically penetrating point is that I'm foisting the 'burden' of difference on my children.  Apparently I could throw my own kids in to today's proceedings as a job lot, and that would fix everything.

I'm starting to feel like one of those bastards who refuses their kids transfusions or antibiotics because of their own beliefs.  Still, there'll be mince pies afterwards, and I haven't had one yet this year.



I think in a lot of cases its about tradition rather than religious beliefs.I have been christened apparently despite the fact that my family arent particularly religious in any way.My brother didnt want a christian burial but he still got one which i didnt particularly agree with but again this was more to do with tradition rather than religious beliefs.

I am an agnostic and i dont believe in worshipping anything but i dont resent being baptised in holy water and despite the fact that i dislike organised religion i do have Christian values to a certain extent.

Perhaps the fact i have been baptised might explain why i have such a strong dislike of Lucifarianism and Satanism ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 13 December, 2009, 01:35:40 PM
My brother, who, in all probability will bury me (or burn, or launch into the sun) has been emotionally blackmailed with talk of "ultimate betrayal" to dissuade him from doing anything remotely religious with my bones.  I think it's worked.

Of course, now I'm considering medical science for my old carcass, he won't get the chance to be tempted (hopefully) as the family only get what's left after medical students have done their thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 05:34:14 PM
Lachesis, of course, thank you!  Now I can feel even more stupid when I can't remember tomorrow.

So the christening was interesting - I think all concerned imagined they were getting away with a secular-type affair, but in fact all ended up swearing all kinds of solemn oaths of fealty to Cod, the Baby Jeebus and the Holey Spigot.  It was amusing watching participants who were probably last in a church at their christenings writhe under the glare of religiosity - fair play to the professional baby-wetter, he gave them their money's worth.  I was gad I didn't take up the three-for-two offer, I suspect I'd have combusted with shame half way through.

That said, the wee girl was absolutely gorgeous, clad in a christening robe made from her great-great-grandmother's wedding dress, and previously worn by her great grandad in India,  her grandmother (my mum), two of her uncles and me.  So that bit I enjoyed.  Also, the mince pies were choice.

Oh, and it's medical experiments for me too.  If nothing else, I want the female doctors of tomorrow to never be satisfied with the physiques of their future husbands.  Failing that, I'm sure the pigs could use some decent chow.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 December, 2009, 06:25:54 PM
Leaving your body to science is all very well...however. After discussions over several beers with a couple of old friends of mine who are doctors (one a GP, the other a consultant neurosurgeon if you please), I'm getting burnt to a tee and blown out of a cannon. Fair enough, you're not going to know a damn thing about it, but the thought of a hungover medical student stuffing up your various orifices and hacking away at your carcase like a crackhead kebab shop worker is just slightly too much.

But as I say, you won't feel a thing. And it is a noble thing to do.

Minor impedimentally, I left a tissue in my jeans pocket before washing them. Black t-shirts with fetching flecks. Tut.

 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 07:03:37 PM
QuoteFair enough, you're not going to know a damn thing about it, but the thought of a hungover medical student stuffing up your various orifices and hacking away at your carcase like a crackhead kebab shop worker is just slightly too much.

Idea used to worry me, but then I greatly enjoyed the funeral of the grandmother of good friends of mine, who had donated her body to science and put all kinds of no-fuss conditions into her dying wishes, only to end up with not one but two religious ceremonies arranged by well-meaning relations instead.  I attended the second of these, a proper Catholic funeral (she was Church of England, unlike most of the family) but with no coffin or body, which created all sorts of hilarious missteps and doubletakes which were greatly enjoyed by the put-out grandkids who would sooner have honoured her wishes, and by me.  It's a good way of reminding both yourself and your family that the body is only a small part of the person and once it's packed in not worth fussing over.  Dead people get to live on in the memories and through the lives of those they've affected, but we spend our time fixated on a body.  Better to get it out of the way.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 December, 2009, 08:09:49 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 12 December, 2009, 06:15:05 PM
I had the same thing when I was in hospital with potentially life-threatening testicle woe.

Holy shit! Any form of testicle woe is a Very Bad Thing Indeed, but life-threatening testicle woe? Hope that's behind you now, Mike (the woe, not the testicle).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 December, 2009, 08:11:21 PM
I've forgotten what I was going to put on this thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 December, 2009, 08:35:41 AM
Quote from: Noisybast on 13 December, 2009, 08:09:49 PM
Holy shit! Any form of testicle woe is a Very Bad Thing Indeed, but life-threatening testicle woe? Hope that's behind you now, Mike (the woe, not the testicle).
It's a heroically scarred, puckered sack now.  I won't bore you with details.
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 December, 2009, 07:03:37 PM
It's a good way of reminding both yourself and your family that the body is only a small part of the person and once it's packed in not worth fussing over.  Dead people get to live on in the memories and through the lives of those they've affected, but we spend our time fixated on a body.  Better to get it out of the way.
It's just meat, and once you no longer exist it starts to go off.  Seems a waste to bin it if you can help future medics prolong, save & improve countless lives.  Not enough people do it.  I urge you all to consider it.

I've just finished my first EVER will and it's in there (as is the no Jovus, Mavis & Jethro).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 December, 2009, 11:24:50 AM
Not even Jethro?  I always thought the seed-drill was pretty cool, and as for those flute solos...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 December, 2009, 12:17:11 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 14 December, 2009, 08:35:41 AM
It's just meat, and once you no longer exist it starts to go off.  Seems a waste to bin it if you can help future medics prolong, save & improve countless lives.  Not enough people do it.  I urge you all to consider it.


[/quote]

No shit but i misread your comment as -"future medics prolong , save and improve pointless lives ".

You could live on by becoming a sperm donor.

Imagine the consequences and improvements to the gene pool if i chose to do this...............
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 December, 2009, 12:20:37 PM
I don't want kids under any circumstances, the fun of playing with the little blighters might be about the only silver-lining on what, for me, would be a massive cloud. 

No ta. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 December, 2009, 04:24:31 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 14 December, 2009, 12:20:37 PM
I don't want kids under any circumstances

Oh, I would if circumstances were different, but they're not, so I don't. It really is circumstances more than anything else that decided me against having any kids ever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 December, 2009, 05:57:57 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 14 December, 2009, 04:24:31 PM
Oh, I would if circumstances were different, but they're not, so I don't. It really is circumstances more than anything else that decided me against having any kids ever.

Wise words, people.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 14 December, 2009, 06:10:08 PM
If only more people thought like that.  Or just had the courage to come out and say if, like me, they really really DON'T want any - I know of someone who felt he "HAD TO" for his girlfriend, despite not being at ALL up for it himself.  They've since split up.  Better all round to talk about these things and be honest, both with each other and yourself. 

Bravo Ush.  Can't be an easy decision, but it is the right one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 December, 2009, 11:52:44 AM
I watched all my footage of the Minty shoot last night on the telly in Widescreen (as I filmed it in 16:9. Now that I've put it onto the laptop it's squished into 4:3. None of my previous stuff has ever done this, aaargh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 December, 2009, 12:33:27 PM
I just watched a stand in postman deliver my mail and as I went to the door I saw him fold up an envelope that had 'Fragile' tape wrapped around it and push it through the letter box.
I opened the door and my verbal assault took place.

"Excuse me mate can you tell me why you folded this up to push into the letter box when it says FRAGILE all over it, especially as you saw me coming to the door?"
"It's not very stiff so I thought it would be okay."
"How does that work in your head mate, it says FRAGILE and that's how you treat the thing"
Well it didn't feel fragile"
"What, it didn't feel FRAGILE, it has FRAGILE all over the FUCKING envelope you idiot"
"I'm sorry, what more can I do?"
"Here's an idea you moron, when you saw it had the words FRAGILE plastered all over it and you saw me you only had to wait a few bloody seconds as I was about to open the door."

With this I came inside before I really got angry. I opened my ebay victory and all is well. I doubt my next parcel will arrive at all now. Fucking stand in postmen >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 December, 2009, 01:18:17 PM
What is it with these bloody automatic doors everywhere?  I'm under a lot of time pressure at the moment, and whenever I go anywhere I'm forced to break my step and w-a-a-a-i-i-t while a sliding door starts to open and then creaks slowly out of my way.  Hurry the drokk up!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 December, 2009, 01:18:38 PM
Aaaargh, time eating Double post!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 December, 2009, 05:31:12 PM
Just had to smash the ice in the gutters of the conservatory and then fished it out with my now blue hand. It must be cold down south!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 December, 2009, 06:52:00 PM
I was reading this months SFX and came upon the 'Being Human' article. Now being a show that I like I read the thing in full, imagine how pissed off I was when I read the following!

The "control room" is a bank of monitors and a few folding canvas chairs tucked into one corner; director Colin Teague calls the shots from here, and reads Judge Dredd comics between takes. ("They're not mine," he protests, "they're from Mitchell's bedroom!" but Toby Whitehouse later spills the beans: "Oh he's a total comics geek.")

Let me see, is he trying to say that he's embarrassed to be reading Judge Dredd. For fucks sake, it's bad enough that there are so few British comics (small press excluded, which is thriving from what I can see) in the shops that we get some twat scared to say he likes the comic. I mean if what was said 'he's a total comics geek' is true then he could have at least said that he liked it. I mean, he is directing a series about a Vampire, a Werewolf and a Ghost living together >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 15 December, 2009, 06:53:38 PM
If he's in THAT show, he's ashamed of the wrong thing...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 15 December, 2009, 06:57:08 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 15 December, 2009, 06:53:38 PM
If he's in THAT show, he's ashamed of the wrong thing...

HERETIC!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 15 December, 2009, 07:03:50 PM
Being human suckd ass. The end.

Although it WAS filmed in my old neighbourhood from uni-days. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 15 December, 2009, 07:52:17 PM
We shall be having words about this...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 15 December, 2009, 08:15:50 PM
It was AWFUL.  That's a word.  You can have it. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 December, 2009, 08:28:25 PM
Last week I missed my sons first nativity play, He was Joseph, because of fucking work. Good news us we have ordered it on DVD.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 15 December, 2009, 09:48:06 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 15 December, 2009, 08:15:50 PM
It was AWFUL.  That's a word.  You can have it. 

*seethes quietly*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 December, 2009, 09:48:36 PM
Looks like cheques are being phased out in banks as of tomorrow. Boo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 15 December, 2009, 09:59:16 PM
Put me down as firmly on Mike's side in the Being Human debate- pretentious wank of the highest/ lowest order. The pilot was good, but then they replaced the two good actors with horrible charismaless arses, and seemed to think they were doing something "important". I swear BBC Wales is full of cocks. The series was almost unwatchable, and I certainly won't be watching series two.

And it's got Russell Tovey- THE most irritating person in the history of people.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: satchmo on 15 December, 2009, 10:03:22 PM
I loved the pilot, but hearing they were replacing the vampire lad and the brilliant Andrea Risebourough kind of put me off to be honest, and I never got round to watching the series in the end. I'll give it a butchers one day...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 December, 2009, 10:22:14 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 15 December, 2009, 09:48:36 PM
Looks like cheques are being phased out in banks as of tomorrow. Boo.

Already under way over here.  You have to wonder about the supposed cost-saving logic - it costs over a euro to process each one, and apparently we only write 15 each on average every year.  I make that about €20, which is a hell of a lot less than just having a credit card costs me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 15 December, 2009, 10:31:37 PM
I don't have a chequebook. Never have.


I never saw the Being Human pilot. I did see the series though and thought it was a briliant piece of television. I'll agree that Russell Tovey is bloody annoying though but the rest of the cast made up for it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 December, 2009, 08:51:52 AM
Cheques are utterly pointless.  I'm looking forward to them going the way of the dodo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 16 December, 2009, 09:53:12 AM
B-but if they get rid of cheques, how will I pay my yearly Tooth subscription...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 December, 2009, 09:57:26 AM
Credit/Debit card.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 16 December, 2009, 10:01:40 AM
I guess. :( Seems a bit impersonal, though. If I'm signing away large chunks of my own money away I want to do it personally, y'know?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 16 December, 2009, 10:05:01 AM
Um, no.  Not really.  Sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 16 December, 2009, 10:21:51 AM
Quote from: Matt Timson on 23 September, 2009, 05:27:36 PM
Quote from: King Trout on 21 September, 2009, 01:39:12 PM
Thanks for the thoughts on phonics, all. Rose is only in the crazily-named "ante-pre-school" year but I'll remember, and keep an eye on things.

We're lucky to live where we do, with lots of great little village schools nearby. But it can't hurt to get involved.

- Trout

We took the decision not to not push reading and writing on Lottie before she started school as that's what school is for.  As somebody else has already mentioned, you run the risk of your child being bored out of their mind, with the end result being that they lose interest and actually go backwards.  Plus, you know, they're at school for a long time- so why not just let them play for as long as they can?

Lottie's just started in Reception (or the infants, as we used to call it) and is doing the phonics thing now.  She seems to be getting the hang of it so far and I'm really enjoying reading the books with her- but I'll let you know if we have any particular problems with it.  I think the main thing is that you have to be prepared, as a parent, to go the extra mile yourself.  The sad truth is that teachers are burdened with a lot of crap these days- and whereas you shouldn't have to step in and pick up their slack- that's exactly what you're going to have to do if you genuinely want to help your child.

As for teachers themselves- you get good and bad.  From my own point of view- and from personal experience- I think you're probably better off not getting in a teacher's face every five minutes unless it's absolutely necessary.  Do it too many times with a bad teacher and your child will probably suffer in the classroom as a result.


This is technically in the wrong thread now, but I wanted to give you an update on it.

Phonics is working out really well for Lottie.  Once you get the hang of the way that they're being taught, it actually makes a lot of sense (or at least, we think so).  There are, of course, exceptions- but that's down to the crazy way we spell certain words and would be problematic no matter how you decided to teach somebody to read.

Lottie has just been the narrator in her school nativity- a part that usually goes to one of the juniors.  Eat that, phonics doubters!

;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 December, 2009, 01:14:55 PM
The only bad thing about cheques was the excessively long time that it takes for them to clear.

And the bad thing about phasing them out means that if i need paying by someone then they have to go to a bank and draw out X amount from the bank or i have to give them my bank details to have it paid into my bank account and quite honestly i am not that happy doing that.Banks wont like it everyone has to go in to a bank and draw out thousands at a time and whats more banks wont be able to do this for very long before they run out of cash.

Whats the alternative then ?




Quote from: TordelBack on 15 December, 2009, 10:22:14 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 15 December, 2009, 09:48:36 PM
Looks like cheques are being phased out in banks as of tomorrow. Boo.



Already under way over here.  You have to wonder about the supposed cost-saving logic - it costs over a euro to process each one, and apparently we only write 15 each on average every year.  I make that about €20, which is a hell of a lot less than just having a credit card costs me.


How do you get paid and collect payments ? Obviously if you are dealing with commercial property developers/construction companies etc its safe to exchange details but what about private individuals ?

The only alternative i can think of is to have a website with a payment system.

Anyway from what i have heard they wont be phased out until 2018.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 December, 2009, 01:46:47 PM
QuoteHow do you get paid and collect payments ? Obviously if you are dealing with commercial property developers/construction companies etc its safe to exchange details but what about private individuals ?

Well, they haven't implemented anything yet, just decided to go ahead.  I have literally no idea how it will work, about the only people who pay us by electronic transfer are State bodies, and the only people we don't pay by cheque are staff and various standing-order based utilities.  I also like the control that double-signing a cheque confers - the idea of my office manager or business partner having control of an electronic payment system worries me.  I have enough trouble keeping track of existing electronic systems, but that's probably a weakness on my part.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 December, 2009, 01:54:21 PM
I can't seem to wrap presents without getting loose pubes stuck under the sellotape. Is it just me?

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 16 December, 2009, 02:19:33 PM
Quote from: Banners on 16 December, 2009, 01:54:21 PM
I can't seem to wrap presents without getting loose pubes stuck under the sellotape. Is it just me?
M@
You mean you've started your Spendfest shopping already?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 16 December, 2009, 02:48:41 PM
Bit scary that. You're way too organised...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 16 December, 2009, 02:57:06 PM
Quote from: Banners on 16 December, 2009, 01:54:21 PM
I can't seem to wrap presents without getting loose pubes stuck under the sellotape. Is it just me?

M@

Use your hands, not your cock.
Just an idea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 December, 2009, 03:11:04 PM
I was so excited with all the stuff going on that I didn't check my shift pattern properly and thought I was off tonight, so could be on the chat room for hours. Sadly I'm off tomorrow, bollocks ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 December, 2009, 05:33:51 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 16 December, 2009, 01:46:47 PM
QuoteHow do you get paid and collect payments ? Obviously if you are dealing with commercial property developers/construction companies etc its safe to exchange details but what about private individuals ?

Well, they haven't implemented anything yet, just decided to go ahead.  I have literally no idea how it will work, about the only people who pay us by electronic transfer are State bodies, and the only people we don't pay by cheque are staff and various standing-order based utilities.  I also like the control that double-signing a cheque confers - the idea of my office manager or business partner having control of an electronic payment system worries me.  I have enough trouble keeping track of existing electronic systems, but that's probably a weakness on my part.

BACS payments are fine for paying employees as employess dont want to wait for cheques to clear usually.

However i smell a rat again :

This quote from the article linked below made me laugh a bit because of its stupidity :




"Our fear is that setting a date will give the green light to banks and retailers to withdraw cheques even earlier than 2018, as some already have. It is vital that before cheques are phased out, the Payments Council ensures there is a practical, safe, paper-based alternative in place which serves the needs of this group."


Lets phase out or abolish cheques and replace cheques with a practical paper based alternative !!

:-\ ::)

What ??

Cash ??

Cash is a cheque from the Bank Of England who " promise to pay the bearer the sum of 5 pounds" or however much but if everyone went to the Bank Of England with their 5 pounds they would only get another 5 pounds in whatever denomination in return because the gold standard was abolished so that 5 pounds is not backed by anything so their whole ethos contradicts itself and the BOE would be unable to meet its obligations as a private company because there isnt anywhere near enough paper currency in circulation.

;D :-\

Whoever itwas here that said that Cheques are pointless is talking rubbish because for businesses they are essential and given the fact that i have already pointed out that it is very difficult or impossible for you or anyone else to go into a bank and draw out 10,000 quid for example [or whatever the limit is] without a prior arrangement then phasing out cheques is idiotic.

Another thing is until recently i could pay my bank a quid and they would clear any cheque by the next working day providing it doesnt bounce of course but that has been stopped.

"Lets all go ahead with the plan and implement it even though we have no idea what the alternative will be !!"

The stupidity continues...................


Article :
http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2009/dec/15/cheques-bounced-out-history
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 December, 2009, 04:40:50 PM
Sometimes being a father can be hard.

I'm sure that I've made no secret that my son (Sam) has autism and life can be a struggle for him and us sometimes (quite a lot of times actually). Anyway he's 10 (11 in Feb) and over the last year or so his baby teeth have started to drop out. Now the first time was funny and sad as he didn't know what to do and tried to put it back into his mouth and was worried about what was happening.
Since then we've been able to inform him in a certain way that it's okay for some teeth to fall out as new better one will take their place.

Just now my wife called me to say that one of his molars was starting to fall out but was hanging on in there. When I walked into the front room Sam had a pair of scissors in his hand and was wanting to cut his tooth out, as he was worried and in a bit of pain.

In stepped Dad, I went and found a pair of pliers that would be able to do the job and with the wife saying 'you are kidding' proceeded to yank the bugger out. It took a few attempts and Sam was uncomfortable with it but he was going to be in more discomfort, as he would just keep trying to pull it and who knows when it would fall out. I must admit he didn't flinch once and Carolyn was holding his hand and saying soothing things.

This is the only time that I've had to cause my son any pain and it was one of the hardest things I have had to do but I knew it had to be done as he would just cause himself more pain and be anxious to get the tooth out.

Life!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 17 December, 2009, 06:25:37 PM
That's a pretty incredible story. Well done for doing the hard thing for your son.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 01:55:23 AM
I just had a bunch of kids shouting and screaming outside my house and running around in the courtyard throwing snowballs outside my house which was distracting me from watching a film so i had to open the window and tell them to Fuck Off which fortunately for them they did.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 December, 2009, 05:48:45 AM
...Miles to go before I sleep.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 08:17:31 AM
I kept being woken up by wind last night.  Wind normally makes me feel very warm by comparison to how cold I'd be if I were FEELING the wind, so this was a shock.  Probably because it was very cold last night.  Oh well.  Awake now. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 18 December, 2009, 09:41:16 AM
Quotekept being woken up by wind last night.  Wind normally makes me feel very warm

Hey it's anatural thing - I tell Mrs Mikey that I'm only trying to warm the bed.

Oh...

I'll get me coat.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 09:44:24 AM
Yeah, oddly enough I had some of that last night too.  THAT didn't wake me up though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Matt Timson on 18 December, 2009, 10:30:26 AM
I am unable to find evidence of Mike Gloady and this mysterious congratulating each other on their choice of partner.  I require an informed opinion before making my judgement.

8)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 10:38:50 AM
Let's not start THAT again....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 18 December, 2009, 11:12:49 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 01:55:23 AM
I just had a bunch of kids shouting and screaming outside my house and running around in the courtyard throwing snowballs outside my house which was distracting me from watching a film so i had to open the window and tell them to Fuck Off which fortunately for them they did.

Bah Humbug, eh, Pete?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 December, 2009, 11:19:45 AM
Trying to get hold of some hi-res press images from a company which has helped us out in this regard every few weeks for the last 2 years. Our contact there has now left, so the new person wants us to fill in forms, get references, prove credentials and send mock-ups of the new ad.

The net result of all this will be an hour wasted - and the hi-res images being sent across as requested. They could just send them now and save us all the bother.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 18 December, 2009, 11:23:42 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 01:55:23 AM
I just had a bunch of kids shouting and screaming outside my house and running around in the courtyard throwing snowballs outside my house

I believe that the correct term for this is "playing" ...?

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 18 December, 2009, 11:26:52 AM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 18 December, 2009, 11:12:49 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 01:55:23 AM
I just had a bunch of kids shouting and screaming outside my house and running around in the courtyard throwing snowballs outside my house which was distracting me from watching a film so i had to open the window and tell them to Fuck Off which fortunately for them they did.

Bah Humbug, eh, Pete?  ;)

Imagine children outside enjoying the snow when they could be inside watching telly or on the console, WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 11:32:11 AM
Hoodies, eh?  

I feel bad about thoughts like those, Peter, but I DO have them.  

I feel like I'm going to hell for what just happened though.  Happened to look out the window at the deep-pan Cripsin Stevens when a cyclist, bombing down the path (and into the alleyway next to my house) slipped on ice and spun arse-over-booby over the handlebars and landed painfully on his head.  Laughed my arse off (which he clearly heard) but sod it, I could use a laugh or two this morning.

And maybe it'll stop him plummetting at (literally) break-neck pace through the narrow pathway in the alley (which is dangerous on so many levels).  I've been flatened myself several times by morons on bikes in there (and once by a motorbike, I'm not making this up).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 18 December, 2009, 11:39:39 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 08:17:31 AM
I kept being woken up by wild last night.  Wild normally makes me feel very warm by comparison to how cold I'd be if I were FEELING the wild, so this was a shock.  Probably because it was very cold last night.  Oh well.  Awake now my love. 

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 11:41:07 AM
This isn't fucking funny you know.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 18 December, 2009, 11:45:09 AM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 11:41:07 AM
This isn't fucking funny you know.

yeah, it is !
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 18 December, 2009, 11:48:28 AM
its meant in a caring way...  ;D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 11:49:39 AM
I dont mind anyone playing but i dont like SHOUTING !!! and SCREAMING !!! LOUDLY at 2 am.

I wouldnt do that myself because i would have a bit more consideration for others who might be asleep and have to get up early to go to work or whatever.Al;so they could have gone over the road and played in the church garden instead of in here.

Would anyone here mind if i did that in their front garden at 2am ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 18 December, 2009, 11:56:41 AM
Snow is gay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 18 December, 2009, 12:10:32 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 11:49:39 AM

Would anyone here mind if i did that in their front garden at 2am ?

2:00am is a somewhat crucial detail you omitted from your original post, Peter, and very much marks a dividing line between "justifiably annoyed" and "miserable bastard".

Fair enough -- send 'em on their way!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 December, 2009, 12:51:33 PM
Quote from: Banners

The net result of all this will be an hour wasted - and the hi-res images being sent across as requested.


Which is exactly what happened. Bah!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 18 December, 2009, 12:59:01 PM
Quote from: Banners on 18 December, 2009, 12:51:33 PM
Quote from: Banners

The net result of all this will be an hour wasted - and the hi-res images being sent across as requested.


Which is exactly what happened. Bah!

M@


Sounds like the newbie at the other end is trying to justify their desk space.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 December, 2009, 01:05:21 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 18 December, 2009, 12:59:01 PM
Quote from: Banners on 18 December, 2009, 12:51:33 PM
Quote from: Banners

The net result of all this will be an hour wasted - and the hi-res images being sent across as requested.


Which is exactly what happened. Bah!

M@

Sounds like the newbie at the other end is trying to justify their desk space.

Like something out of a page-a-day Dilbert desk calendar.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 01:08:40 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 18 December, 2009, 12:10:32 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 18 December, 2009, 11:49:39 AM

Would anyone here mind if i did that in their front garden at 2am ?

2:00am is a somewhat crucial detail you omitted from your original post, Peter, and very much marks a dividing line between "justifiably annoyed" and "miserable bastard".

Fair enough -- send 'em on their way!

Cheers



Jim

It had to be done but they did run off [literally] with one of the plastic lids to the recycling boxes.

Ruddy kids .....

Wait till i get my hands on em the little bastards !
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 December, 2009, 01:12:25 PM
I'm looking forward to driving up to Bradford tonight. Last week the roads were clear, I have a feeling tonight may be different.
I'm taking my sleeping bag on this one ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 18 December, 2009, 01:12:52 PM
Fair play PW.

Banners, either the newb is, as a previous poster put it, "trying to justify desk space" or they're a little worried about getting into trouble and making a mistake in a new role.  Bloody annoying either way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 December, 2009, 01:29:34 PM
Sam just brought a snowball into the house and threw it at me :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2009, 01:51:01 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 December, 2009, 01:29:34 PM
Sam just brought a snowball into the house and threw it at me :o
Pull another tooth out!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 December, 2009, 06:29:52 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2009, 01:51:01 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 December, 2009, 01:29:34 PM
Sam just brought a snowball into the house and threw it at me :o
Pull another tooth out!

Cripes, looks like that there Helltrek is being led by the Marathon Man! 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 December, 2009, 06:36:47 PM
Is it safe?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 December, 2009, 07:41:26 PM
Just trying to figure out my new phone, what a fiasco. I'm in for a mental night at work trying to sort the bugger out. Still haven't figured out how to call anyone  :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 21 December, 2009, 08:05:10 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 December, 2009, 07:41:26 PM
Just trying to figure out my new phone, what a fiasco. I'm in for a mental night at work trying to sort the bugger out. Still haven't figured out how to call anyone  :-[


(http://thumbs.dreamstime.com/thumb_94/1162291684g0ah0m.jpg)
then dail number.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 December, 2009, 08:54:56 PM
After spending 2 hours longer than usual in driving down to Brighton from Essex via the Dartford crossing, to see my family for the first time since August, I can honestly say that one minor impediment is the selfish f***ers who insist - insist, I say - upon turning out to drive on frozen roads in the middle of a blizzard just to do their Christmas shopping at Thurrock Lakeside the last Monday before Christmas.
>:(

I say, if you can't get it mail order or find it in a shop within 20 minutes of home, then you probably don't need it.

(I say this as someone who didn't absolutely have to travel right there and then, significantly increasing the risk level of my journey and others' by putting one more car on the road in icy conditions, but if I hadn't my mum would've been very disappointed (and very nearly was, as I arrived in Brighton only 10 minutes before the time of the restaurant booking instead of 2 hours), I would have been absent from a family dinner out at a table for 10, and I'd have been a day later returning to Cardiff and by Christmas Eve I'd still have been sorting out the pigsty mess we left behind here instead of wrapping presents.)
:|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 December, 2009, 08:57:03 PM
You should have called in at Peter's as he lives by the sea!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 December, 2009, 09:07:35 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 December, 2009, 08:57:03 PM
You should have called in at Peter's as he lives by the sea!

Regrettably it was only a flying visit. Sorry, Peter.  ;)

I was back and forth like a yo-yo all weekend. Cardiff to Essex on Friday; down to Brighton on Saturday and back up to Essex the same night; back down to Brighton on Monday evening and back to Cardiff today, with a detour off the M4 to avoid long delays due to an accident, down to Winchester and back up via the Newbury bypass - which, incidentally, got blocked the Oxford side of the M4 going north and the Southampton side going south even as we were driving along it on the unaffected northwards stretch south of the M4.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 December, 2009, 12:38:42 AM
I always feel compelled to read Zatanna's backward words and it takes far too long.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 23 December, 2009, 09:41:23 AM
I do that too, Roger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 December, 2009, 09:52:52 AM
I haven't had a proper night's sleep in at least 4 weeks because I've been burning the candle at both ends for work and pleasure, but mostly work. On my Christmas visit I found my in-laws' foam mattress on one night and divan airbed on another both too uncomfortable to sleep on, so no rest there either. The flickering muscle of sleep deprivation in my forehead, which I've never experienced before, has still not gone away!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 23 December, 2009, 11:02:55 AM
No rest for the wicked, eh, Ush?

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 December, 2009, 02:13:17 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 23 December, 2009, 09:52:52 AM
The flickering muscle of sleep deprivation in my forehead, which I've never experienced before, has still not gone away!

See, you try to avoid the consequences of reproduction by keeping a souwester on the little sailor, but nature finds a way to hit you up anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 December, 2009, 02:30:10 PM
 >:(Aaaaaargh! >:(

Whilst walking up my street I saw the postman collecting his second bags worth of mail from the postal van parked over the road from our house.
I jokingly said "I hope you haven't left one of those sorry, you were out notes" to which he stood and thought for a micro second and then said "It's in the van".
I quickly started to sprint up to the vehicle whilst shouting but the BASTARD drove off. Now I have to go down the town tomorrow and collect the bloody things (it said on the card two packets).
I know that one is a present for a relative but the second I think may be one of those New Mongoose Dredd books, (not the game) as when I was down town I noticed whilst checking my account, that the Book Depository had taken the appropriate amount out for the first book!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 December, 2009, 04:07:20 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 December, 2009, 02:30:10 PM
he stood and thought for a micro second and then said "It's in the van". I quickly started to sprint up to the vehicle whilst shouting but the BASTARD drove off.

Was it by any chance this same fella: http://2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,25797.msg477572.html#msg477572 (http://2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,25797.msg477572.html#msg477572)?

I wonder why!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 December, 2009, 09:42:17 AM
Nice one House of Usher :thumbsdown:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 December, 2009, 10:20:14 AM
We have to keep the postmen sweet. They have power over us!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 December, 2009, 10:37:39 AM
I was nice to the one on foot, this time. It's the van driver who better watch out, I shall be going down to the collection place about 12:00ish :thumbsdown:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 December, 2009, 08:40:23 PM
I put my boxers on back to front today.


[spoiler]The skids are on the front which may render them unsalvagable.[/spoiler]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 December, 2009, 09:23:31 PM
I bet they don't smell as bad as Victoria Wood's belated return to TV sketch comedy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 24 December, 2009, 10:25:02 PM
i nearly fell off the ladder whilst retrieving pressies out of the attic today,not to bad but the attic door is right next to the bannister and i fel that way which would have been a bit of a bugger i can tell you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 December, 2009, 03:25:01 PM
Home run is going smoothly but there's always a chance it could go wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 25 December, 2009, 05:00:49 PM
Good luck Roger, I'm rooting for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 25 December, 2009, 06:38:50 PM
You go for it Roger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 December, 2009, 11:27:20 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 24 December, 2009, 08:40:23 PM
I put my boxers on back to front today.


[spoiler]The skids are on the front which may render them unsalvagable.[/spoiler]

[spoiler]I once had to have my boxer shorts cracked off of me after a particular nasty bout of holiday gastro-enteritis and subsequent twelve hours conked-out-on-the-floor-of-a-tent. That was the king of all skiddies. They were like brown cardboard. Once they came off, me and a mate drove into Frejus and deposited them in a rubbish bin. He still laughs about this.[/spoiler]

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 December, 2009, 05:09:49 PM
Whilst at work last night I listened to a Black Library audio book, Thunder From Fenris by Nick Kyme. It's about the Space Wolves on Skorbad, a planet ravaged by war which just so happens to have a zombie plague as well.
Anyway I was thoroughly enjoying the story (Toby Longworth reads it) until the end. It has one of those open endings, which I absolutely detest.

[spoiler]The final scene is of one space wolf charging into battle against his blood brother who has sucuumbed to the wolfen curse. This is after three others have died on the journey towards this meeting. That's right it stopped as they charged each other!!!!![/spoiler]

I actually thought that something had gone wrong with the cd player and I also cleaned the disc, but to no avail that was the ending :thumbsdown:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 27 December, 2009, 05:11:01 PM
I had to do the washing up. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 December, 2009, 05:13:48 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 27 December, 2009, 05:11:01 PM
I had to do the washing up. 

I have that every Wednesday, just before or as I go into the chat room. It's a small price to pay I suppose for an evenings laughter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 December, 2009, 06:06:39 PM
There were some minor impediments, but I can't for the life of me remember what they were!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 December, 2009, 11:23:44 PM
The brother went back to Oz today, and I never really had a chance to connect with him (for want of a better phrase).  I was madly busy for the first weeks he was here, then there was the endless round of relatives and in-laws we both had to get through over Christmas, and then he was off to the airport.  We sat at various dinner tables and discussed the numerous bodily fluids of our respective babies (they're just one month apart),  but we've never been close and we never really managed to talk.  It'll probably be several years before I see him and my niece again, and I can't help but feel I missed an opportunity.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 December, 2009, 11:55:30 PM
Has anyone noticed that the latest version of Firefox is inherently unstable and full of glitches ?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 December, 2009, 12:16:37 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 28 December, 2009, 11:55:30 PM
Has anyone noticed that the latest version of Firefox is inherently unstable and full of glitches ?

Mine seems okay - you may have picked up a virus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 31 December, 2009, 06:08:35 PM
I was back from work very early today (about 3) so I thought I'd take the opportunity to buy some new brake blocks. The first four bike shops I went to were all closed! Since when did Hogmanay become some sort of national day of idleness? Fortunately, the fifth one (and last on the way home) had some semblance of a work ethic.

I'm still in the bath.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 31 December, 2009, 06:11:58 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 28 December, 2009, 11:55:30 PM
Has anyone noticed that the latest version of Firefox is inherently unstable and full of glitches ?



Firefox does tend to lock up once a day for me, but it still beats Internet Explorer opening multiple tabs by itself every 20 minutes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 31 December, 2009, 07:50:43 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 31 December, 2009, 06:11:58 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 28 December, 2009, 11:55:30 PM
Has anyone noticed that the latest version of Firefox is inherently unstable and full of glitches ?



Firefox does tend to lock up once a day for me, but it still beats Internet Explorer opening multiple tabs by itself every 20 minutes.

There is an update available now but i havent bothered to install it yet.

Anything is better than Internet Explorer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 31 December, 2009, 09:49:48 PM
... Because the drive holding all my DVD rips failed a couple of weeks ago and now the motherfucking DVD drive has packed up in the Mac Mini, leaving me with no option other than watch the pathetic pile of disgraceful shit that passes for tv tonight.

Jesus.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 January, 2010, 07:48:12 PM
At least the girl in the Evony ads was real.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 January, 2010, 08:06:19 PM
I was going to make a serious and insightful post on another thread but backspaced all of it and then clicked back to "View Active Topics". Then I realized something: I was scared. I was scared to say something that wasn't coarse, inane, self-consciously incongruent or some combination of all three.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 04 January, 2010, 08:12:02 PM
Toughen the fuck up Krustofski!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2010, 08:13:50 PM
Those fuckers at Comet left a message on the answer machine today, whilst I was asleep, saying that the monitor I had paid for and should be collecting today will not be in until Thursday.
British retailing at it's fucking best. No bloody wonder I normally use the web >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 January, 2010, 08:28:04 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 04 January, 2010, 08:06:19 PM
I was going to make a serious and insightful post on another thread but backspaced all of it and then clicked back to "View Active Topics". Then I realized something: I was scared. I was scared to say something that wasn't coarse, inane, self-consciously incongruent or some combination of all three.

Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2010, 08:13:50 PM
Those fuckers at Comet left a message on the answer machine today, whilst I was asleep, saying that the monitor I had paid for and should be collecting today will not be in until Thursday.
British retailing at it's fucking best. No bloody wonder I normally use the web >:(

You think thats bad...


I went in one of those places for the first time a few years ago to buy something.I cant remember what i was buying but the place was the size of a fucking aircraft hanger and i had the intention of going in there and paying for whatever i was buying and then leaving the premises with it to take it home as you do and i was actually annoyed that i couldnt do this and was then expected to pay first and then have it delivered when i wanted it right there and then so i left without buying and went somewhere else.

You dont have to do this with Ikea so i dont see why i should have to do it with electrical goods unless the item i wanted was sold out but not because the shop doesnt actually stock anything other than display items.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 January, 2010, 09:04:48 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2010, 08:13:50 PM
Those fuckers at Comet left a message on the answer machine today, whilst I was asleep

Hmm. My reaction is: I hope that didn't wake you up.

Quote from: Peter Wolf on 04 January, 2010, 08:28:04 PM
I went in one of those places for the first time a few years ago to buy something.

Maybe time to let it go?  :lol:

QuoteI cant remember what i was buying

Mmm. Definitely time then.

Quotei was actually annoyed that i was then expected to pay first and then have it delivered when i wanted it right there and then. You dont have to do this with Ikea

No, but at Ikea even if you want something delivered, YOU have to go and collect it from the warehouse and take it to the delivery section, because it keeps costs down, but if you order online it just comes straight to your door at no extra cost. What's up with that??

Quoteso i dont see why i should have to do it with electrical goods unless the item i wanted was sold out but not because the shop doesnt actually stock anything other than display items.

Perhaps it's a 'show room.'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 January, 2010, 09:18:57 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 January, 2010, 09:04:48 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2010, 08:13:50 PM
Those fuckers at Comet left a message on the answer machine today, whilst I was asleep

Hmm. My reaction is: I hope that didn't wake you up.

Quote from: Peter Wolf on 04 January, 2010, 08:28:04 PM
I went in one of those places for the first time a few years ago to buy something.

Maybe time to let it go?  :lol:

QuoteI cant remember what i was buying

Mmm. Definitely time then.

Quotei was actually annoyed that i was then expected to pay first and then have it delivered when i wanted it right there and then. You dont have to do this with Ikea

No, but at Ikea even if you want something delivered, YOU have to go and collect it from the warehouse and take it to the delivery section, because it keeps costs down, but if you order online it just comes straight to your door at no extra cost. What's up with that??



I didnt say anything was up with having something delivered and my point was that i wanted to leave the shop with the object after paying for it.

Whats up with that ??
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 January, 2010, 06:28:20 PM
I've just found out that the toy gun that comes when you pre-order Bayonetta won't be coming with the game on Friday.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xINPjMxM0EI
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 05 January, 2010, 08:25:07 PM
The phone rang at 19:39 and when I answered it, it was a woman from Comet who was letting me know that my monitor was ready for collection. I asked her what time they close and she said "8 o'clock".
"See you soon" I replied and put the phone down.

OPERATION MAD DASH was a go!
"Sam get your boots on and grab your coat, we're off to Comet", I shouted at my son who was upstairs, (the wife was out swimming) whilst I grabbed my keys and the receipt.
Good job there wasn't much snow on the roads as the shop is on the other side of the town. I engaged first gear and moved smoothly through them until we hit Warp 9.9.
Luckily we made it with a couple of minutes to spare and what made me laugh the most was that they checked my receipt 3 times. Jesus Christ they had phoned me up and I had told them I was coming and when I got there I was the only customer in the shop and therefore was the only person here to pick up that monitor.
Sometimes I do wonder.

P.S. Why did they not phone me earlier or better still don't bother until the next day, if it came in that late!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dog Deever on 06 January, 2010, 01:12:42 AM
After you had the monitor in hand, did you manage to crack off some 'you are stupid and shit' type comment before leaving?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 January, 2010, 01:12:33 PM
I got the Them Crooked Vultures CD for Xmas and its f****** awful and i dont have a receipt for it so i cant exchange it for something else.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 January, 2010, 11:33:20 PM
Looks like I've lost another fucking phone. I should just jump in front of a lorry now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 09 January, 2010, 02:12:14 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 06 January, 2010, 01:12:33 PM
I got the Them Crooked Vultures CD for Xmas and its f****** awful and i dont have a receipt for it so i cant exchange it for something else.

Give it a few listens, Peter. It's a grower.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 January, 2010, 05:18:09 PM
The Binmen finally emptied our recycling bin today and when I went to bring ours and the neighbours back onto our properties I noticed ours was 3/4 full still.
I rang the twats up and explained the situation, the bloke replied that I may have had something in the bin that I should not have.
I replied "No, we've not had the bin collected for nearly 4 weeks and so that means all the Christmas wrapping paper is in there, along with twice the amount that normally should be in it. This means it's all compressed, so we can actually use our bin. Here's an idea why don't your staff check the bin is empty when it comes back down or would that be too much to ask, that someone does their job properly!"
With this he said they would be round to do it later, well they fucking well haven't. Well done Maidstone Council for yet another SHIT service. Jesus fucking Christ I sometimes wonder how this county keeps going when it seems no fucker can be arsed to put 100% into their jobs nowadays.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 11 January, 2010, 05:20:41 PM
Nice cup of tea?  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 January, 2010, 05:29:49 PM
I don't drink tea or coffee or water. I shall have a Coke and relax ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 January, 2010, 08:59:12 PM
We haven't had our rubbish collected since 27th December.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 11 January, 2010, 09:10:49 PM
I have a frozen pipe and I've no idea where. Plus I'm absolutely hopeless at fixing things (apart from Visual Basic subroutines.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 11 January, 2010, 09:39:30 PM
yet again i buy a vintage shirt on ebay ...and find that it would only fit a starving jockey

was everyone tiny in the 50s? Ive seen pictures of Elvis- he looked like a big guy

dammit >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 January, 2010, 01:49:19 AM
I'm sat in a cold storage depot helping out by doing some shunting. Problem is I'm on my 45 minute break bods keep coming up to me to ask me to move trailers only for me to explain the law about tacho breaks and that I can't until 02:00 or I can lose my licence and therefore my job.
They all know these rules, the bunch of twats.
I am able to start my break by law again each time someone asks me work related questions but I don't  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 12 January, 2010, 08:53:35 AM
Freezing temperatures and not driving for the last week = flat battery
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 January, 2010, 06:13:53 PM
On the bus this morning the guy in front of me had a small gob of hair gel that he hadn't combed in properly on the back of his head. Bleurgh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 January, 2010, 07:53:36 PM
I am totally fucking sick and tired of idiots who constantly run down my home town which is Hastings because its apparently a "depressed area".

This happened just 10 minutes ago when someone i was talking to criticised it and she hasnt even visited the fucking place !!

So she is just parroting cheap media talking points that you find in the Daily Mail so she got her head bitten off and so will anyone else who criticises it because i am fucking tired of it.Myself and my immediate family lived there for 20 years so i think i know a bit more about it than they do.



Arrogant Stupid annoying Twats.


GGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR...........
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 January, 2010, 08:02:47 PM
It's a good job you didn't watch 'Inside Out' on BBC 1 last night Peter.
30 minutes on the BNP in Hastings, me and the good wife laughed all the way through it. The Biased Broadcasting Corperation, just watching who they asked in the street what they thought said it all in the first few minutes.
See if it's on the iplayer and really get annoyed ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 January, 2010, 08:46:23 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 January, 2010, 08:02:47 PM
It's a good job you didn't watch 'Inside Out' on BBC 1 last night Peter.
30 minutes on the BNP in Hastings, me and the good wife laughed all the way through it. The Biased Broadcasting Corperation, just watching who they asked in the street what they thought said it all in the first few minutes.
See if it's on the iplayer and really get annoyed ;)


Well it makes perfect sense to focus on Hastings if you are going to make a documentary about the BNP and the Underclass !!

WHERE else would you go ??

[sarcasm]

Their choice of interviewees was hardly what you would call a broad selection.It was all mostly filmed in St.Leonards but you will find the same social problems in any deprived area like St.Leonards but i have yet to read or watch anything in the media that is positive about Hastings and St.Leonards yet they all fall over themselves hyping up Brighton which in my opinion is an overpriced and overrated and filthy shithole.


Of course documentaries like this only perpetuate the negative image.

I get so sick of people sometimes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 January, 2010, 08:48:28 PM
Yeh you have to stay away from Hastings. You are liable to lose an eye.









V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 January, 2010, 09:24:41 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 January, 2010, 08:46:23 PM
Well it makes perfect sense to focus on Hastings if you are going to make a documentary about the BNP ...

Stems from deep-rooted guilt about their failure to resist the last lot of foreign devils...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 January, 2010, 11:28:36 PM
I have been in this house for six years now and hadn't had my heating serviced in all the time I have been here. last month I got it serviced even though it was working just fine. Last week we had the coldest day on record and my heating broke down.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Monarch on 13 January, 2010, 11:33:19 AM
My shower broke down during christmas I stank for days it pissed me off. Its working now thank god
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 January, 2010, 12:48:39 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 12 January, 2010, 09:24:41 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 January, 2010, 08:46:23 PM
Well it makes perfect sense to focus on Hastings if you are going to make a documentary about the BNP ...

Stems from deep-rooted guilt about their failure to resist the last lot of foreign devils...

I dont think that the french invaders were eligable for a Council House.Did the Norman invaders get preferential treatment to the detriment of the indigenous population ?

Was there a Nationalist movement amongst the indigenous population of Serfs ?

"There be too many o them bleedin Frogs and they come over ere and take over ! I think its a bloody disgrace an they come over ere an they build their bloody castles an churches everywhere ! They int got no respect for our culture an i aint bleedin bowin an scrapin to them and that bloody William as they dont belong ere !"

I also dont know why the first wave of Norman invaders and the battle that took place is known as the battle of Hastings because it didnt take place in Hastings as it took place in Battle or what is now known as Battle so it should be known as the Battle of Battle.

As an interesting aside to that: The battlefield site is completely devoid of archeological evidence of the battle that took place.There has been next to nothing unearthed and there has been no mass graves discovered so either the historical account is wrong and it took place elsewhere or the site was picked clean and the dead were buried a good distance away and the mass graves havent been discovered yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 January, 2010, 01:29:28 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 January, 2010, 12:48:39 PM
The battlefield site is completely devoid of archeological evidence of the battle that took place... so either the historical account is wrong and it took place elsewhere or the site was picked clean and the dead were buried a good distance away and the mass graves havent been discovered yet.

Maybe it took place in Hastings.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 January, 2010, 01:30:17 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 January, 2010, 12:48:39 PM
As an interesting aside to that: The battlefield site is completely devoid of archeological evidence of the battle that took place.There has been next to nothing unearthed and there has been no mass graves discovered so either the historical account is wrong and it took place elsewhere or the site was picked clean and the dead were buried a good distance away and the mass graves havent been discovered yet.

I'm sure I read in the last couple of months that archeologists had finally pinpointed the site, and it wasn't any of the handful of possible sites that are usually put forward.

On second thoughts, that may have been another famous battle. One of the findings was that longbows weren't as crucial as previously assumed because they found more evidence of artillery and muskets, which seems a bit premature for 1066. May have been Bosworth Field? Where's our resident archeologist when you need him?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 January, 2010, 01:38:59 PM
I don't think there's much doubt about the site of Bosworth ... as I understand it, a very cursory turning over of the earth there will still often yield toe or finger bones ...

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 January, 2010, 01:42:06 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 13 January, 2010, 01:30:17 PM
Where's our resident archeologist when you need him?

I think there are at least two.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 January, 2010, 01:43:03 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 13 January, 2010, 01:30:17 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 January, 2010, 12:48:39 PM
As an interesting aside to that: The battlefield site is completely devoid of archeological evidence of the battle that took place.There has been next to nothing unearthed and there has been no mass graves discovered so either the historical account is wrong and it took place elsewhere or the site was picked clean and the dead were buried a good distance away and the mass graves havent been discovered yet.

I'm sure I read in the last couple of months that archeologists had finally pinpointed the site, and it wasn't any of the handful of possible sites that are usually put forward.

On second thoughts, that may have been another famous battle. One of the findings was that longbows weren't as crucial as previously assumed because they found more evidence of artillery and muskets, which seems a bit premature for 1066. May have been Bosworth Field? Where's our resident archeologist when you need him?


http://66.102.9.132/search?q=cache:ZBUCPCbt0P4J:www.prlog.org/10425863-new-site-for-the-battle-of-hastings-uk-1066.html+battle+of+hastings+archeology&cd=5&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk&client=firefox-a

I didnt realise that but i just found this article after a search.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 January, 2010, 02:02:48 PM
Just done a search myself, and it WAS Bosworth I was thinking of:

QuoteFive centuries of searching for one of Britain's most significant battlefields has finally ended with the discovery of "extraordinary and unexpected" pieces of artillery in a Leicestershire field.

The finds near Market Bosworth at last pin down the notoriously "wandering site" of the battle that overthrew Richard III – the last English king to die at the head of an army – and established the Tudor dynasty and the modern state.

Full article  here (http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2009/oct/28/battle-bosworth-dig-leicestershire)

Looks like many battlefields are uncertain, or disputed over several sites.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 January, 2010, 06:03:40 PM
I feel like i have been cheated and lied to about the location of the Battle Of Hastings after reading the article i posted earlier.There is a school in the grounds of Battle Abbey that i went to and i was fascinated by the history and the alleged battle and i always used to re-imagine it all in my mind and i used to wander around the grounds and the alleged battlefield site.

There was also that nonsense about the boggy areas of the battlefield site where there was always rusty coloured water and mud present which was supposed to be the blood still in the soil left over from the battlefield when in fact it was leftovers of Iron age smelting of iron.

Goddamn historical revisionists.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 January, 2010, 06:28:54 PM
Sorry, sorry, for my part I was out digging up stuff for a change.  Very interesting article about Hastings - I was brought to Battle as a kid and have similar misty memories as Peter.  I have a very good friend who spent some years working on analysing the primary historical evidence for various (Irish) battlefields, and it was pretty shocking to hear how most 'known' locations were absolute fictions.  I've only ever dug at one supposed battlefield, and while it was great fun imagining sightlines, cover and crossing points, we found absolutely nothing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 January, 2010, 02:03:35 AM
This kind Ebay seller takes the time to explain to buyers what has gone on recently regarding Ebay record/vinyl auctions>


http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/JOY-DIVISION-UK-3-TRACK-12-45-ATMOSPHERE-2_W0QQitemZ180453668428QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Records?hash=item2a03e0764c


Ebays policy is absolutely Fucking stupid and like the buyer says its just ebay increasing its final value percentages.A little while ago i noticed that there were no longer any auctions for records on Ebay starting at 99p and i couldnt work it out.Ebay insists that the seller of a record has to offer free postage yet the postage is NOT FREE because the starting bid includes the buyers postage fees so postage is NOT FREE !!

Someone tell me i am wrong here !

How am i able as a buyer to accurately determine what i am being charged by the seller for postage of the item without emailing the seller ?

Why is it somehow reasonable that i am bidding on an item and effectively bidding on an unknown postage charge when a seller can start an auction with what could be a completely arbitary figure that includes "free" postage ?

As far as i know Royal Mail dont offer "Free" postage ?

Why have Ebay singled out vinyl auctions for this scam ?

Is it acceptable in any way for a buyer not to have postage and packaging costs clearly set out at the outset by the seller ??

What exactly is the sellers standard rate ?

Why should i comply with a system that makes it easier for less scrupulous sellers to overcharge for P+P ??

GGGGRRRRRRRRRR>...............
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 January, 2010, 09:59:38 AM
I thought I'd lost my phone so I bought a replacement but then I hadn't lost it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 15 January, 2010, 02:50:04 PM
I've got the theme from Blue Peter stuck in my head.

Blue Peter, FFS.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 January, 2010, 03:17:39 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 15 January, 2010, 02:50:04 PM
I've got the theme from Blue Peter stuck in my head.

Blue Peter, FFS.....

Dammit, so have I now! Bastard!

I'm dreading seeing the state of my flat when I get home. Housing Association workmen arrived at 8am (Why do they need to start so damn early?) to begin work on a complete new kitchen and bathroom. They were ripping cupboards out when I left for work, and the entire contents of the kitchen, including fridge and cooker, are in the living room. However, after a few weeks of crappiness and disruption, we should have a lovely new kitchen and bathroom.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 January, 2010, 03:51:16 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 15 January, 2010, 03:17:39 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 15 January, 2010, 02:50:04 PM
I've got the theme from Blue Peter stuck in my head.

Blue Peter, FFS.....

Dammit, so have I now! Bastard!

I'm dreading seeing the state of my flat when I get home. Housing Association workmen arrived at 8am (Why do they need to start so damn early?) to begin work on a complete new kitchen and bathroom. They were ripping cupboards out when I left for work, and the entire contents of the kitchen, including fridge and cooker, are in the living room. However, after a few weeks of crappiness and disruption, we should have a lovely new kitchen and bathroom.

I hope that your builders are members of the considerate builders scheme !

I never start work at 8.00am if i am doing building work.No way as i dont do early starts.I always start about 10.00am and work right through until about 5.30 - 6.00 with no breaks apart from the odd 10 minutes.

It also shouldnt take a few weeks just to change a kitchen and bathroom either.Thats way too long.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 January, 2010, 03:59:05 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 January, 2010, 03:51:16 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 15 January, 2010, 03:17:39 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 15 January, 2010, 02:50:04 PM
I've got the theme from Blue Peter stuck in my head.

Blue Peter, FFS.....

Dammit, so have I now! Bastard!

I'm dreading seeing the state of my flat when I get home. Housing Association workmen arrived at 8am (Why do they need to start so damn early?) to begin work on a complete new kitchen and bathroom. They were ripping cupboards out when I left for work, and the entire contents of the kitchen, including fridge and cooker, are in the living room. However, after a few weeks of crappiness and disruption, we should have a lovely new kitchen and bathroom.

I hope that your builders are members of the considerate builders scheme !

I never start work at 8.00am if i am doing building work.No way as i dont do early starts.I always start about 10.00am and work right through until about 5.30 - 6.00 with no breaks apart from the odd 10 minutes.

It also shouldnt take a few weeks just to change a kitchen and bathroom either.Thats way too long.

Most builders in my experience do seem to start work at 8, and knock off about 4, I've no idea why - I'd much rather hire a late starter like you! The electrician actually showed up closer to 7.30 to shut the power off ready for the builders! They've advised 20 working days, including decorating and finishing off. It does involve some structural work (there are large concrete built-in closets that are being removed to incraese the size of the room), extensive plumbing, rewiring, a lowered ceiling and lots of tiling, so it's more than just fitted units.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 15 January, 2010, 04:00:01 PM
Glad I could help DDD! :)

In my previous existence on site, 8am was the latest. But we started as early as 5:30 and finished at 11pm on some projects!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 January, 2010, 04:22:22 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 15 January, 2010, 04:00:01 PM
In my previous existence on site, 8am was the latest. But we started as early as 5:30 and finished at 11pm on some projects!

Yup, 8 is a pretty late start - even in winter a lot of sites kick off at 7.00am, worse luck - I was peering into impenetrable gloom the last three days from 7 until nearly 9am.  That said, over here Planning Permission in residential areas frequently includes maximum hours of work, usually 8-6, and  no Sundays or Public Holidays, for which I am most grateful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 January, 2010, 09:24:44 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 15 January, 2010, 09:59:38 AM
I thought I'd lost my phone so I bought a replacement but then I hadn't lost it.

Good job you didn't jump off a bridge, then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 January, 2010, 09:42:21 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 January, 2010, 02:03:35 AM
This kind Ebay seller takes the time to explain to buyers what has gone on recently regarding Ebay record/vinyl auctions>


http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/JOY-DIVISION-UK-3-TRACK-12-45-ATMOSPHERE-2_W0QQitemZ180453668428QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Records?hash=item2a03e0764c


Ebays policy is absolutely Fucking stupid and like the buyer says its just ebay increasing its final value percentages.A little while ago i noticed that there were no longer any auctions for records on Ebay starting at 99p and i couldnt work it out.Ebay insists that the seller of a record has to offer free postage yet the postage is NOT FREE because the starting bid includes the buyers postage fees so postage is NOT FREE !!

Someone tell me i am wrong here !

How am i able as a buyer to accurately determine what i am being charged by the seller for postage of the item without emailing the seller ?

Why is it somehow reasonable that i am bidding on an item and effectively bidding on an unknown postage charge when a seller can start an auction with what could be a completely arbitary figure that includes "free" postage ?

As far as i know Royal Mail dont offer "Free" postage ?

Why have Ebay singled out vinyl auctions for this scam ?

Is it acceptable in any way for a buyer not to have postage and packaging costs clearly set out at the outset by the seller ??

What exactly is the sellers standard rate ?

Why should i comply with a system that makes it easier for less scrupulous sellers to overcharge for P+P ??

GGGGRRRRRRRRRR>...............

I tried to sell a mobile phone and ebay insisted that I sell it with free P+P. There was no way I could put a price for postage for the item without putting it in the description only so I fucked it off.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 16 January, 2010, 12:53:33 AM
My balls are well itchy. They feel like they are on fire. If I start scratching I will bleed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 January, 2010, 12:54:21 AM
Trim your nails ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 January, 2010, 11:54:09 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 16 January, 2010, 12:53:33 AM
My balls are well itchy. They feel like they are on fire. If I start scratching I will bleed.

Spoken like the true Proustian scholar.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 January, 2010, 04:25:06 PM
Just got back from Morrisons with Sam after another confrontation in the car park. As we left the front of the shop ready for our long trek to where I parked the car, I noticed a massive 4x4 reverse into one of the disabled bays near the entrance. Whilst walking to our car I kept looking back to see who got out, no one did. By the time I had got to our car I had decided to have a closer look, so I drove over and noticed it was just a bloke sat at the wheel.
Bollocks to this I thought, I quickly set my phone to camera and climbed out. As I lined the shot up he started to drive off, that is until I stood in front of the bumper.
I approached the drivers window, "Where's your blue card mate?"
"I'm just waiting for my father" he replied.
"So, that doesn't mean you can park here!"
"He won't be long, he's just getting some stuff"
"Well mate if you think it's alright why did you start to drive off when you saw me line up my camera on you? I'll tell you why, coz you're a lazy twat who couldn't give a toss about anyone else. My son has a disability and we don't use the spaces (we don't have a badge and we don't need one but it always makes them fluster) so why don't you just go and find another bloody space!"
With that he drove off to the other side of the car park. By this time a crowd of shoppers had stopped to watch the event unfold, as I do like to raise my voice in a situation like this as it brings more shame on the lawbreaker.

Anyway I feel happy now ;)

It really pisses me off, there was nothing wrong with the bloke, he was just another lazy twat who thinks he's above the law. So what if there are a few empty spaces near the store front it doesn't give anyone the right to use them just because they are empty, they are for people who have a hard time in life as it is.
I believe anyione caught doing something like this should have a leg amputated so they can use these bays in the future and if not that a bloody big fine instead.
LAZY TWATS >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 January, 2010, 06:30:17 PM
I'm with you releasing your inner Dredd there, CF.  Well, right up to the bit about amputation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 January, 2010, 06:32:58 PM
Well I did say a big fine if not that ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 16 January, 2010, 07:17:36 PM
My LOST season 5 box set that Mrs Tips bought me for Christmas finally turns up yesterday but it's bloody Region 1.

Now I'm going to have to find a code to unlock the DVD player.

Bah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 January, 2010, 07:22:01 PM
Did you tell her off?

Or was it the packers mistake ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 16 January, 2010, 08:07:09 PM
I just walked up to the local shop (instead of driving because I need the exercise) and I got all the way to the counter with my milk when I realised I had left my wallet at home. I walked home and drove back to the shop and got my milk and then ripped my new jeans getting back into the car.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 16 January, 2010, 09:32:47 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 16 January, 2010, 08:07:09 PM
I just walked up to the local shop (instead of driving because I need the exercise) and I got all the way to the counter with my milk when I realised I had left my wallet at home. I walked home and drove back to the shop and got my milk and then ripped my new jeans getting back into the car.

Should have walked there Rog.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 17 January, 2010, 12:39:43 PM
Regarding the eBay thing, I kind of agree with the policy. In the old system people used to sell DVDs for 1p but with P&P at £2.95. eBay gets nothing of the post charges and were kind of taking it up the ass on these kind of deals. At least with the new system you can place a bid for what you are willing to pay to own the listed item, all costs included, and you won't get any nasty surprises after the fact.

That said as a seller it's not so good as you know no one is going to pay £1.50 for that Nick Hancock 'Goals and Goofs' DVD mother got me so it'll gather dust and scorn for ever more.



Minor impediments? Lets see... laptop had to be reformatted and I lost the last year of non-backed up letters data. Oh well a joyous retread is on the cards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 17 January, 2010, 01:01:06 PM
QuoteI noticed a massive 4x4 reverse into one of the disabled bays

Are you sure it wasn't Logan?  :)

Minor impediment - lost a hub cap off the car the other day. Makes it look cheap!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 17 January, 2010, 04:03:34 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 16 January, 2010, 08:07:09 PM
I just walked up to the local shop (instead of driving because I need the exercise) and I got all the way to the counter with my milk when I realised I had left my wallet at home. I walked home and drove back to the shop and got my milk and then ripped my new jeans getting back into the car.

There's a moral there somewhere...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 January, 2010, 08:06:51 PM
Lark Rise to Candleford is on. My partner just informed me that Judi Dench isn't in it, and that Cranford and Lark Rise to Candleford are two different programmes. I'm now confused, because I don't know what I've watched and what I haven't, and what is the necessity for both programmes to be made by the BBC.

She has reminded me that it was my bloody choice to watch the damn things anyway, having avoided both (like the plague) up until December 2009.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 January, 2010, 08:45:36 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 17 January, 2010, 08:06:51 PM
My partner just informed me that Judi Dench isn't in it, and that Cranford and Lark Rise to Candleford are two different programmes.

That's quite funny.  We just caught the beginning of tonight's episode, and I said to the wife, "Wife", I said, "It's a pity we haven't been watching this, I think it's got Judi Dench and Imelda Staunton in it, and they're always good".  After 10 minutes of sweating postmen and a lot of talk about a Bishop, we put a House DVD in instead.  At least I know Hugh Laurie's in that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 January, 2010, 08:49:00 PM
In our house it went off at ten past eight because we realized it wasn't the good one, and that finished at Christmas.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 17 January, 2010, 08:58:52 PM
Dear Sir or Madam*,

*What do you mean "madam"?
Oh, I'm sorry, I have a cold.

I wish to protest in the strongest possible terms about your irresponsible claim, which I reproduce below:

Quote from: TordelBack on 17 January, 2010, 08:45:36 PM
we put a House DVD in instead.  At least I know Hugh Laurie's in that.

On the basis of said recommendation, I purchased the following DVD:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/House-DVD/dp/B000CEGU0S/ref=sr_1_22?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1263761508&sr=8-22

Imagine my dismay upon discovering that Mr Laurie does not -- as you CLAIM -- appear in this motion picture at all. Nor did he direct or write said piece of cinematic expression. Nor did he even compose the soundtrack. In fact, I believe that it is safe to say that Mr Hugh Laurie is IN NO WAY involved with this filmic diversion.

I await your proposed remedy in response to this catastrophic piece of misinformation perpetrated by you in respect of this matter.

Yours, &c

Outraged of Nottingham
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 17 January, 2010, 09:09:48 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 17 January, 2010, 08:06:51 PM
Lark Rise to Candleford is on. My partner just informed me that Judi Dench isn't in it, and that Cranford and Lark Rise to Candleford are two different programmes. I'm now confused, because I don't know what I've watched and what I haven't, and what is the necessity for both programmes to be made by the BBC.

Well there's only ever been seven episodes of Cranford, and that's including the two just shown at Christmas.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 January, 2010, 09:17:30 PM
Yes. I make that seven in all. I thought there was a chance Lark Rise to Candleford might be any good, but it wasn't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 17 January, 2010, 09:56:18 PM
CF: I absolutely agree. As you may know, I work with adults with disabilities, and it pisses me off no end to see non-blue-badgers in blue-badger bays.

Though that said, I do now see you gesticulating wildly as he drove, turning to the massed onlookers and shouting "I AM the LAW!!", then arresting them for peeping.

Jim: You've made me want to watch House agan. The proper House, not that tv thing with Hugh Laurie. The bit when he's killed the Miss Ashby monster (All Saints Junior School injoke there- the prosthetic woman who looks a bit like Aughura from the Dark Crystal) and starts to bury the bits, and the music kicks in- that's one of my defining cinema memories from the mid eighties, that is. Love it. Though House II is better, madder, funnier, and has a man falling over a bush, who looks EXACTLY like my firend Chris (who has been known from that very moment til this very day as "Chris Bushman"). Why is it nearly £30 though on Amazon? Surely it's about a pound isn't it by now?

Generally: I had no idea Cranford and Lark Rise to Candleford were different shows! How odd, you do indeed learn something new every day.

SBT

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 January, 2010, 10:02:20 PM
She can't tell them about the other part yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 17 January, 2010, 11:58:02 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 17 January, 2010, 04:03:34 PMThere's a moral there somewhere...

Yes, it's don't buy £6 jeans from Asda.



I love Lark rise to Cranford, I've never watched a minute of it but the wife goes nuts for anything like that so I get a guaranteed hour of quality time with my PC or whatever :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 18 January, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
Funnily enough, last night was the first time I saw any of this Candleford/Carnford thing- and 10 minutes of Brian from Spaced going on about a Bishop was enough for me.
I played Lego Indiana Jones instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 18 January, 2010, 11:54:43 AM
When you should have been toning that strip instead.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 18 January, 2010, 12:03:18 PM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 18 January, 2010, 11:54:43 AM
When you should have been toning that strip instead.



I would have- but Bou was creating another masterpiece at the time...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 02:54:44 PM
Thanks entirely to this thread, I just bought House in a shop in Hastings. For, as I predicted, a pound. However, the "minor impediment" is that they also had the new Friday the 13th- which I've seen and wasn't impressed with, also for a pound. So I bought that too. So I spent two pounds, when I could have only spent one.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 January, 2010, 02:56:02 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 02:54:44 PM
I bought that too. So I spent two pounds, when I could have only spent one.

You flash bugger ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 January, 2010, 03:25:28 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 18 January, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
10 minutes of Brian from Spaced

OF COURSE! I saw the trailer and it was bugging me who that was!

Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 02:54:44 PM
which I've seen and wasn't impressed with ..... So I bought that too.
I don't get this - Why would you buy a film you weren't impressed with? Considering all the other DVDs, videos, books, records and comics you probably own, not to mention all the  new stuff constantly coming out, will you honestly EVER play this DVD?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 04:45:58 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 January, 2010, 03:25:28 PM

Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 02:54:44 PM
which I've seen and wasn't impressed with ..... So I bought that too.
I don't get this - Why would you buy a film you weren't impressed with? Considering all the other DVDs, videos, books, records and comics you probably own, not to mention all the  new stuff constantly coming out, will you honestly EVER play this DVD?

It's a Friday the 13th movie- so therefore I legally have to own it, to keep my membership status of the "Lifelong Fan" club. I may have to send back my furry Jason badge with moving googly eyes if I hadn't bought it. I just wasn't going to pay full price for it- but a pound, well, I'd be silly not to. I rented it previously, but didn't watch all the special features, so it's worth it for that alone. In fact, I may watch them tonight.

The F13 series, while being undoubtedly crap, is very important to me. Part 3 ("in...3D!", but not) was in the very first batch of horror films I ever saw, down my mate's house, in 1984. I've loved them ever since, and always wear a hockey mask badge on my coat. Oh, and my wife was allegedly in the club-set crowd scenes in Jason Takes Manhattan. Me and Jasey-baby have history, from the early days of my friend and I making up "Barry Norman interviews Jason" skits in the back of school exercise books (every answer Jason gave was "bum") to drawing pictures of Jase asleep in his bush, with his teddy, to writing 'Friday the 13th part 312: Jase In Space' years before Jason X, and shooting a short homage while at college.

As I say, they are of course, bollocks. Though, I'd happily claim Part 4 to be a gloriously nasty movie and the opening sequence/ titles of Part 6 never, ever, fails to make me laugh. The new one, dismal though it is, is perfectly acceptable for all that. If it was great, it wouldn't be an F13 movie. Though Jason re-imagined as Andy Pipkin was a little hard to take.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 January, 2010, 05:35:36 PM
Yep, welcome to the world of "cult" and "fandom" where, if we think something is "utter shit" we'll only watch it maybe ten or twenty times.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 January, 2010, 05:59:02 PM
Fair enough! I'm just coming to the conclusion that life's too short for DVDs. I've got a shelf full and hardly ever watch any of them. And I've never gotten around to the massive re-read of 30+ years of progs I've got stacked up, never mind the Shelf of Unread Novels and Non-Fiction. If the entertainment industries would just STOP MAKING NEW SHIT for a year, I may have a (small) chance of actually catching up!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 January, 2010, 07:08:48 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 04:45:58 PMI may have to send back my furry Jason badge with moving googly eyes if I hadn't bought it.

Exquisite image, Steev!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 18 January, 2010, 07:10:05 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 January, 2010, 05:59:02 PM
If the entertainment industries would just STOP MAKING NEW SHIT for a year, I may have a (small) chance of actually catching up!

And with this, sir, I pledge my allegiance! Oh yes, I've often felt the same. I collect DVDs for "the library"- for that far-off time when the kids have grown up and we'e got endless hours with nothing to do. As if that'll ever happen.

My personal stack of unwatched/ unread stuff if preeeetty high!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 January, 2010, 08:44:39 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 January, 2010, 03:25:28 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 18 January, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
10 minutes of Brian from Spaced

OF COURSE! I saw the trailer and it was bugging me who that was!

In our house he's called Mark Heap.  ;)

(Because that's his name)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 18 January, 2010, 09:08:39 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 18 January, 2010, 08:44:39 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 January, 2010, 03:25:28 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 18 January, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
10 minutes of Brian from Spaced

OF COURSE! I saw the trailer and it was bugging me who that was!

In our house he's called Mark Heap.  ;)

(Because that's his name)

Well in our house he's Brian from Spaced!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 January, 2010, 09:15:38 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 18 January, 2010, 09:08:39 PM
Well in our house he's Brian from Spaced!

:D


I do quite agree though about having at times wished the entertainment industry would just STOP so I could catch up. If not stop altogether, at least it could prioritise: you know, stop making crap films and publishing crap books and just make good ones and not too many of them. But I know that's unrealistic and a bit selfish. Especially as I would dearly love to add to the spew of literary output myself, and I plan to. One day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 18 January, 2010, 09:41:02 PM
What not Statham off of Green Wing - guess our house is doing something wrong...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 19 January, 2010, 09:01:55 AM
I slipped on some ice last week fell on my arse and slid about 10 feet down a hill while spinning uncontrollably. I didn't hurt myself and actually quite enjoyed it, the only person to see this was my 2 year old son who found it hilarious.

However I now keep thinking back to it and wishing that there had been someone there to video it as it was probably the most spectacular fall I'll ever have that didn't kill me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 January, 2010, 01:01:40 PM
To me he shall always be the guy who has Bad Aids.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 19 January, 2010, 08:32:13 PM
To me Mark Heap will always be The Actor Kevin Eldon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 19 January, 2010, 09:01:19 PM
I fucking hate Gok Wan.
He's a patronising cunt and having to watch him move his exploitation wagon on to the disabled has made me quite annoyed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 January, 2010, 09:05:40 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 19 January, 2010, 09:01:19 PM
I fucking hate Gok Wan.
He's a patronising cunt and having to watch him move his exploitation wagon on to the disabled has made me quite annoyed.

Is he feeling their tits, too?

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 19 January, 2010, 09:41:12 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 19 January, 2010, 09:01:19 PM
I fucking hate Gok Wan.
He's a patronising cunt and having to watch him move his exploitation wagon on to the disabled has made me quite annoyed.

As a lady person I find his apparent inability to say the word 'breasts' and subsequent replacement of it with childish slang terms exceptionally irritating
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 January, 2010, 10:18:55 PM
Well some of those sentiments about Gok are indeed understandable.

I do, however, like his ability to (seemingly) uplift people without the need for surgery, liposuction, botox etc. and without the need for the latest mega must have fashion accessories which most makeover shows tend to insist upon.  He does give the impression of trying to see the inner you and make the most of what you've got.

At least that's my impression from catching a couple of shows so possibly all wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 January, 2010, 10:20:21 PM
Fucknuggets.

I'm not going to be able to make HI-EX this year after all.

1001 things have just piled outgoing upon cost upon outgoing and I can't really justify a £200 weekend for just little old me.

I'll start a layaway plan for next year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 19 January, 2010, 10:24:28 PM
I like his warmth and humanity. But I've seen enough of Gok Wan to last a lifetime, so can't imagine myself ever needing to see another of his programmes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 19 January, 2010, 10:38:29 PM
Cock Wank is only annoying to us men because he gets paid for doing what we all want to do, go around feeling women's tits.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 January, 2010, 09:13:11 AM
The kitchen/bathroom work is progressing slowly - I've found out why it's scheduled to take so long - it's because there's one job per day scheduled, that all need to be done in order. Sometimes they show up at 8 and the job only takes half an hour and that's it for the day. None of the workmen know anything about any of the other workmen or jobs and the system seems to be breaking down already (it's only day 4).

Today was supposed to be demolishing the brick and concrete built-in cupboards, but they sent a joiner who was expecting to be ripping out kitchen units (which was done on day 1). Just as well really, as I'm off work feeling like death and was not looking forward to drilling and chiselling all day. They may be back later, it's anybody's guess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 January, 2010, 01:11:23 PM
Air Miles want to charge me £30 to cash in my miles.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 20 January, 2010, 01:49:43 PM
Tips- that's shit, was looking forward to catching up with you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 20 January, 2010, 02:14:55 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 19 January, 2010, 10:20:21 PM
Fucknuggets.

I'm not going to be able to make HI-EX this year after all.

1001 things have just piled outgoing upon cost upon outgoing and I can't really justify a £200 weekend for just little old me.

I'll start a layaway plan for next year.

That's a shame, how about a day trip? Come dressed as the terminator to get in free, bring sanies, cadge drinks(I'd buy you a couple), the train's less than £20 or Megabus for a quid ? sell some of that merchendise on ebay!!

Come on peoples we can sort this!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 20 January, 2010, 03:43:09 PM
Last week, in an effort to finally watch the tail end of Battlestar Galactica, I ordered Razor, Season 4 and The Final Season. Imagine my surprise when I discovered Razor is actually on disc 1 of the Season 4 box set, rendering the standalone disc rather pointless. Cockbiscuits. Ah well, at least I only paid three quid-odd for it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 January, 2010, 03:56:12 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 20 January, 2010, 03:43:09 PM
Last week, in an effort to finally watch the tail end of Battlestar Galactica, I ordered Razor, Season 4 and The Final Season. Imagine my surprise when I discovered Razor is actually on disc 1 of the Season 4 box set, rendering the standalone disc rather pointless. Cockbiscuits. Ah well, at least I only paid three quid-odd for it.
Freaky coincidence time - I just ordered the season 4 and final season box sets today, I hadn't heard of Razor and almost ordered that too, but checked the customer reviews and found it was included. I almost ordered Galactica 1980 by mistake though, cos it seemed to have a picture of the new ship on the cover. Then I actually noticed the date in the title.

I've just today got to the end of a marathon trawl through seasons 1-3, and now I'm off to cut the corners off all my books and papers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 January, 2010, 03:59:58 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 20 January, 2010, 03:56:12 PM
now I'm off to cut the corners off all my books and papers.

I always thought how environmentally unfriendly when I saw all those items with the corners cut off.
Perhaps they had the prices on each corner, you know like the old annuals ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 January, 2010, 06:03:53 PM
I just watched that Santander advert with Lewis Hamilton and the Lego bridge. WHY was he not wearing a hard hat on that bloody building site, where are Health and Safety when you need them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jared Katooie on 22 January, 2010, 09:25:53 PM
I was all set to watch Idiocracy, but my DVD player won't play it. I didn't want to see it as much as Sword of Vengeance (which also didn't work) but I'm still pretty dissapointed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 January, 2010, 07:23:27 PM
One burst condom = €75 down the drain (morning after pill (€15) has to be prescribed by a doctor (€60) in this tin-pot jurisdiction).  I'd like to see the government's cost benefit analysis on that approach to 'family planning'.  Ah well, i suppose it's XXL for me from now on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 23 January, 2010, 07:35:48 PM
Don't brag TB!

Does it really cost €60 just to see a GP? What if you're ill and skint?

I'm pissed off 'cos I was supposed to be seeing that Ian Dury movie tonight, but I'm just recovering from flu and I've got a hacking cough that wouldn't go down well in a cinema, so I'm giving it a miss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 January, 2010, 07:36:03 PM
Bad luck for Mrs Tordelback, all questions of cost aside.

We were talking about Family Planning services in the Wednesday night chat only last week. I was once again vociferously deploring NHS family planning nurses' and doctors' knowledge of barrier methods of contraception, which they apparently don't use themselves. Hence their unfamiliarity with issues of texture, flavour (personally I find mint ones particularly revolting), size ("oh, aren't they all the same?") and expiration dates.

I count myself fortunate, though, never to have had one break.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 January, 2010, 08:28:16 PM
Last summer I was playing in my garden with the kids tearing up and down at great speed. My garden is staged at different levels with railway sleepers. On a return sprint I smashed my foot against one. Bear in mind I was bare footed. Excruciating pain was had by all.
All this week I have been suffering severe stabbing pains along the bone of my big toe. Methinks I have fractured the bastard.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 January, 2010, 10:42:51 PM
I ate the whole pot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 24 January, 2010, 11:30:01 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 23 January, 2010, 07:36:03 PM
Bad luck for Mrs Tordelback, all questions of cost aside.

We were talking about Family Planning services in the Wednesday night chat only last week. I was once again vociferously deploring NHS family planning nurses' and doctors' knowledge of barrier methods of contraception, which they apparently don't use themselves. Hence their unfamiliarity with issues of texture, flavour (personally I find mint ones particularly revolting), size ("oh, aren't they all the same?") and expiration dates.

I count myself fortunate, though, never to have had one break.

Ah, don't get me started on the NHS (he says, at the risk of sounding like a crazed yank)- or more especially the receptionists that guard our GP surgery like demons at the doors to Satan's holiday home.

One example among many: I was prescibed medication for something. When I received the medication, it was the wrong dosage- about half. The booklet said "on no account double your dosage". I phoned the surgery and was told that the GP could under no circumstances speak to me today and that I should instead (you guessed it) double the dosage.

I complained about that.

Then, a few weks later, I took my youngest son to the hospital for some tests, and was told, quite clearly (and given a letter to the same end) that the GP surgery would provide me with the apparatus I needed to do our end of the tests. I took the letter into the surgery, asked for the apparatus, and was refused- by the woman I'd complained about. She said "we never give it out, you have to get it from the hospital". I pointed out the letter, where it said in black and white, that they would- and the timescales concerned (which meant it was vital to do it in the next few hours)- at which point I must have furrowed my brow, because she backed off, shut the glass and made a complaint that I had "become abusive"! I really hadn't- and can only assume that this was straightforward revenge for my earlier complaint.

I spoke to the GP about this later- and from his reaction, I can only assume he thought the same, because nothing further came of it.

I'd change my surgery- but frankly, I believe them to all be the same.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 January, 2010, 10:17:20 PM
The night before last i chewed out an author of a book in a comments section of a website and now i feel guilty about doing so because i didnt really hear out what he had to say but what i did hear or see quoted i totally disagreed with so the guilt that i have for attacking him is a bit irrational but even so i still feel compelled to contact the author and explain what i mean.I just wish i had made my point a bit less aggressively because it might have been a good debate.

Perhaps it doesnt matter.Not sure right now......
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 January, 2010, 01:36:56 AM
Some chancer today I am told was ringing all the door buzzers, requesting access as he claimed to be one of the builders working on the block refurb and that he did something wrong and urgently had to repair it. Well Mr Fuckhead, the builders don't work here on weekends, they have keys and if they wanted to gain access out of hours or didn't have keys with them they would have contacted me. Chancer parasite gave a name which is not the name of any of the builders. He had a hood up and was getting agitated when he was refused entry, thankfully due to one vigilant tenant but I shudder to think that someone else might've just let him in as some people don't have their wits about them (eg tenants here who often leave things in their car on show). I put a note through everyone's door in the block telling them not to fall for that trick. Let's hope this stays in 'minor impediments' and not 'Life spugs'. Fucking burglar chancer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 25 January, 2010, 07:43:14 AM
My wife is only four months removed from her 7 month deployment in Afghanistan and the Air Force mistakenly put her on the list to be deployed again in two weeks. We got the news on Friday that she was to be redeployed and had to wait two agonizing days to find out this morning it was a mistake - two days thinking she would be going out there again. Fucking military.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 January, 2010, 08:10:53 AM
Quote from: locustsofdeath! on 25 January, 2010, 07:43:14 AM
We got the news on Friday that she was to be redeployed and had to wait two agonizing days to find out this morning it was a mistake

Holy crepe, Locusts, what a horrible way to spend a weekend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 25 January, 2010, 08:12:43 AM
The good old military, remember you are not a human being you are a number >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 25 January, 2010, 10:43:25 AM
1. Client asks for a quantity of printing we don't offer, so we reduce the price on a larger batch of leaflets for them.

2. After the job is done and ready to despatch, the client informs us the initial artwork contains two errors - present in their original copy. We make the corrections and do a reprint for free (to keep them sweet) and put it in the production queue on Friday.

3. So with a reduced price and a free reprint, we're losing money. Oh well.

4. Now, after all that, the client "needs" them delivered tomorrow and is kicking up a fuss. Gah.

M@



3. We kindly of
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 25 January, 2010, 04:27:13 PM
Yesterday, I was all set to make a Rogan Josh only to discover I'd forgotten it needed yoghurt, of which we had none - and I was only back from the shops. There was some creme fraiche in the fridge, which may have done the job at a push but it was out of date.

I made a Madras instead.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 January, 2010, 04:44:48 PM
Quotebut it was out of date.

Wimp.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 25 January, 2010, 05:46:33 PM
I was not going to order a curry tonight thinking about the old health and the guilt of lazy spendthrift-ness. Then I go on my favorite website and some bloody bloke's talking about various currys in a bit of a tasty descriptive. And I lost the will to abstain. Dietwrecking mofo. I'll be ordering a lovely spinach one and a madras one to combine with it as soon as I can be bothered to phone. Thanks. Thanks a lot.;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 January, 2010, 08:15:01 PM
Mum owes me £10.

You give me your number, I call you up
You act like your pussy don't interrupt
I don't have no trouble with you fucking me
But I have a little problem wit you not fucking me
Baby you know I'm gonna take care of you
Cause you say you got my baby, and I know it ain't true
Is it a good thing? no its bad bitch
For good or worse, makes you switch
So I walk on over with my crystal
Bitches, niggas put away your pistols
Dirty wont be having it in this house
Cause bitch I'll cripple your style
Now that you heard my calm voice
You couldn't get another nigga, hoochie wont get moist
If you wanna look good and not be bummy, girl you better give me that money
Aooow...

[hook: Kelis]
Hey, dirty, baby I got your money
Don't your worry, I said hey.
Baby I got your money
[X2]

[verse 2:]
Yo! so I glanced at the girls, girls glanced at me
I whispered in their ear, wanna be with me?
You wanna look pretty though, in my video
Ol' dirty on the hat and I let you all know
Just dance! if you caught up in the holy ghost trance
If you stop! I'm gonna put the killer ants in your pants
I'm the O-D-B as you can see
Every eye, don't you be watching me
I don't want no problems cause I put you down
In the ground where you can not be found
I'm just dirt dog trying to make sum bunny
So give me my streaks and give me my honey
Radio, yes all day, everyday
Recognize I'm a fool and ya love me!
None of you nmph better look at me funny
Nmph you know my name now give me my money!

[hook X2]
Dirty: sing it, sing it girls! (during hook)
Just shake it right now!
Somebody else: if dirty want his money
I think you all should give him his money
Dirty: that's how I like girl

Sexy, sexy, sexy!
Sexy, sexy, sexy!

Sexy, sexy, sexy!
Sexy, sexy, sexy!

[verse 3:]
Yo, yo!
Nigga playing in the club like this all night
Bitches put your ass out let me hold it tight
You looking at my wrist saying "its so nice"
The price bitch is diamonds shining disco light
You better help me solve this problem
Or I'm gonna get this money and rob them
Lucky dig when I won the lotto
Ran up on my car for carrying (ryllos?)
You can call me dirty, and then lift up your skirt
And you want some of this dirty, god made dirt and dirt bust yo ass
Stop annoying me, yeah! I play my music loud
It takes the bastard ol' dirty, to move the crowd
They say he had his dick in his mouth
Eddie Murphy told me that back in the house
But give me my money!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 January, 2010, 08:22:29 PM
Mum owes me £10.





You give me your number, I call you up
You act like your pussy don't interrupt
I don't have no trouble with you fucking me
But I have a little problem wit you not fucking me
Baby you know I'm gonna take care of you
Cause you say you got my baby, and I know it ain't true
Is it a good thing? no its bad bitch
For good or worse, makes you switch
So I walk on over with my crystal
Bitches, niggas put away your pistols
Dirty wont be having it in this house
Cause bitch I'll cripple your style
Now that you heard my calm voice
You couldn't get another nigga, hoochie wont get moist
If you wanna look good and not be bummy, girl you better give me that money
Aooow...

[hook: Kelis]
Hey, dirty, baby I got your money
Don't your worry, I said hey.
Baby I got your money
[X2]

[verse 2:]
Yo! so I glanced at the girls, girls glanced at me
I whispered in their ear, wanna be with me?
You wanna look pretty though, in my video
Ol' dirty on the hat and I let you all know
Just dance! if you caught up in the holy ghost trance
If you stop! I'm gonna put the killer ants in your pants
I'm the O-D-B as you can see
Every eye, don't you be watching me
I don't want no problems cause I put you down
In the ground where you can not be found
I'm just dirt dog trying to make sum bunny
So give me my streaks and give me my honey
Radio, yes all day, everyday
Recognize I'm a fool and ya love me!
None of you nmph better look at me funny
Nmph you know my name now give me my money!

[hook X2]
Dirty: sing it, sing it girls! (during hook)
Just shake it right now!
Somebody else: if dirty want his money
I think you all should give him his money
Dirty: that's how I like girl

Sexy, sexy, sexy!
Sexy, sexy, sexy!

Sexy, sexy, sexy!
Sexy, sexy, sexy!

[verse 3:]
Yo, yo!
Nigga playing in the club like this all night
Bitches put your ass out let me hold it tight
You looking at my wrist saying "its so nice"
The price bitch is diamonds shining disco light
You better help me solve this problem
Or I'm gonna get this money and rob them
Lucky dig when I won the lotto
Ran up on my car for carrying (ryllos?)
You can call me dirty, and then lift up your skirt
And you want some of this dirty, god made dirt and dirt bust yo ass
Stop annoying me, yeah! I play my music loud
It takes the bastard ol' dirty, to move the crowd
They say he had his dick in his mouth
Eddie Murphy told me that back in the house
But give me my money!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 January, 2010, 09:54:52 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 25 January, 2010, 08:22:29 PM
Mum owes me £10.

Kelis me arse, what you need to be listening to is this:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXFBYrRIeNw
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 25 January, 2010, 10:28:22 PM
I was told that there was bacon.

"I'm going to my mum's for the day with the girls, there is bacon in the fridge" she said before I left for work on Sunday.

I got home after 12 hours of work spent constantly thinking about the pile of bacon sarnies I would make for my tea, to be enjoyed in an otherwise empty house, accompanied by wine and Playstation.

When I opened the fridge there was no bacon to be found. I looked again as I have a long history of not looking properly but still it evaded me. I even looked a third time, behind all the yoghurt on the top shelf, yet still there was no bacon.

The only other thing I could find to eat was a tin of Disney Princess pasta shapes, so I had that on toast.

My wife and kids returned home soon after, summoned as ever by the "on" button of my magic Playstation. I raised the issue of the Bacon only to be escorted to the fridge and shown the bacon and to be reminded by my wife that I never look properly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 25 January, 2010, 10:34:31 PM
I've watched ten episodes of Farscape in the last 36 hours and now I feel a bit sick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 January, 2010, 10:56:13 PM
Mum responded by telling me that she would have to give me £20 and that I would owe her ten. I didn't even ask for said twenty so I'm in debt and haven't even got the money that I am borrowing yet. I tried getting her back by eating the last of the grapes but there weren't any red ones left and they were starting to go off, meaning that the tart nature of white grapes was exacerbated to an unwelcome degree.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 January, 2010, 12:32:09 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2010, 10:28:22 PM
I was told that there was bacon. When I opened the fridge there was no bacon to be found. I raised the issue of the Bacon only to be escorted to the fridge and shown the bacon and to be reminded by my wife that I never look properly.

I have it on good authority, from a lady of the female sex, that that is, quote "a brilliant story" unquote.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 January, 2010, 12:46:01 AM
They are all in on it together, those women. They must be controlled with drugs. I shall call off this program if my demands are met.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 26 January, 2010, 11:42:38 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 26 January, 2010, 12:32:09 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2010, 10:28:22 PM
I was told that there was bacon. When I opened the fridge there was no bacon to be found. I raised the issue of the Bacon only to be escorted to the fridge and shown the bacon and to be reminded by my wife that I never look properly.
I have it on good authority, from a lady of the female sex, that that is, quote "a brilliant story" unquote.

But isn't the usual routine that the lady of the manor puts things where they don't belong and that's why we fellas can't find stuff? To quote a stand-up comedian I once saw: "You're eating a sandwich, you put it down on the table, next thing it's in a box in the loft."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 26 January, 2010, 11:58:37 AM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 26 January, 2010, 11:42:38 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 26 January, 2010, 12:32:09 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2010, 10:28:22 PM
I was told that there was bacon. When I opened the fridge there was no bacon to be found. I raised the issue of the Bacon only to be escorted to the fridge and shown the bacon and to be reminded by my wife that I never look properly.
I have it on good authority, from a lady of the female sex, that that is, quote "a brilliant story" unquote.

But isn't the usual routine that the lady of the manor puts things where they don't belong and that's why we fellas can't find stuff? To quote a stand-up comedian I once saw: "You're eating a sandwich, you put it down on the table, next thing it's in a box in the loft."

Absolutely, and in my defense the bacon was actually at the very bottom of the fridge with all the veg, with a packet of leeks on top of it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 January, 2010, 12:21:41 PM
 
Quote...and in my defense the bacon was actually at the very bottom of the fridge with all the veg...

Well really.  Who'd think of looking for food in the Veg compartment?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 26 January, 2010, 01:36:17 PM
Yeah, it's not real food like meat.

I have to get up really early tommorrow and I'm already tired!

M

PS
QuoteWimper.
...

Said Godders when he realised he didn't know 'creme fraiche' comes from shops, not his mom's dugs as she told him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 26 January, 2010, 03:36:14 PM
I'm in a waiting room, awaiting eye surgery. And it looks like its gonna a be a while. Noone is talking but time would pass  quicker if we did. I'm hungry and too grumpy and enstranged from anyone here to start a conversation. Gad it may be hours. And I am rubbish at holding conversations with people I don't know and don't know if I have anything in commen with. There's this portly gent who looks at me willing me to  speak and a man around my age smiling courteously at me but my law has wired itself up. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: WoD on 26 January, 2010, 03:56:46 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 26 January, 2010, 12:32:09 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2010, 10:28:22 PM
I was told that there was bacon. When I opened the fridge there was no bacon to be found. I raised the issue of the Bacon only to be escorted to the fridge and shown the bacon and to be reminded by my wife that I never look properly.

I have it on good authority, from a lady of the female sex, that that is, quote "a brilliant story" unquote.

Not mentioning it to my lady...it will just add to the 'man-look' theory she has!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 January, 2010, 04:25:35 PM
My new neighbours who have rented the house next door are yet another rude and uncommunicative couple.One half of the couple,although i am not exactly sure wether its a mother and son or a couple [not thats its my business and i am not interested anyway] knocks on my door this morning to ask if the car parked outside the house that belongs to a cleaner who is working next door is mine.

"Is that your car outside ?"

No politeness whatsoever.Just a discourteous beardy little shit with an offhand manner who i dont like the look of so i just answered with a "No" and closed the door. :D

Previously a few days ago i said hello and i was just blanked by him so i will ignore them in future however they are quiet on the whole so thats fine by me.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: VinceBot on 26 January, 2010, 04:27:33 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 25 January, 2010, 10:34:31 PM
I've watched ten episodes of Farscape in the last 36 hours and now I feel a bit sick.

Did you see the trippy mirrors one, or the trippy 3 dimensions one with different colours? They always bend my brain.


Quote from: TordelBack on 26 January, 2010, 12:21:41 PM
Who'd think of looking for food in the Veg compartment?

TordelBack, denier of veg as food.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 January, 2010, 06:24:33 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 25 January, 2010, 10:34:31 PM
I've watched ten episodes of Farscape in the last 36 hours and now I feel a bit sick.

Well I've just watched all five seasons of BSG (plus the miniseries) in less than 3 weeks, and I'm well and truly frakked. (and so say we all)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2010, 02:33:54 AM
I was in town today buying some of that Egyptian cotton bedding, as I had heard so much about it. It has a 300 thread count which makes it excellent, apparently :-\
Just as I piled my arms with what I required I noticed another pile of bedding that had a 400 thread count but it wasn't Egyptian, what should I do. Bollocks to it I stuck with the 300 count as I couldn't be arsed looking through another display for matching sets of something I liked. It took me over 20 minutes to find what I wanted the first time (I had to get an assistant to go out the back to get a fitted sheet, as there wasn't the one I wanted on display in the size I needed).
I had had a go on it all earlier and it just felt like normal bedding to me and expensive bedding at that ::)

Just looked on a site to check the thread count bollocks and it goes up to 1200 and that is VERY expensive :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 27 January, 2010, 08:02:06 AM
Nice insight into Egyptian cotton and the price hiker that contributes, thread count.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 January, 2010, 09:34:55 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2010, 02:33:54 AM
I had had a go on it all earlier

:D brilliant! :D

Now there's an image.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 27 January, 2010, 10:41:59 AM
I hate unravelling conversations. Sparky replacing lights outside block.

S: "Do you want light there?"
Me: "No there wasn't one there before"
S: "Yes there was. I should know, I took the old one off"
Me (with my lack of pushyness): "Ok, well if there was one there before then put one back there"

Later that evening I look at old photos. No such light there. I email that to surveyor and he says he will pass on pic and message to Sparky's boss not to put up light there. Today I look out window and Sparky is up ladder preparing cable to put light there. So long convoluted discussion with Sparky getting shirty. His boss never passed on message. Other Sparky had a photo he took and that also shows no light there. But Sparky still insisted there was a light there. Arrgh.

His stroppyness is no doubt due to him having to redo one day's work where they put up garish white cable over the brickwork without asking us if we wanted black or white.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 January, 2010, 01:16:52 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 27 January, 2010, 10:41:59 AM
I hate unravelling conversations. Sparky replacing lights outside block.

S: "Do you want light there?"
Me: "No there wasn't one there before"
S: "Yes there was. I should know, I took the old one off"
Me (with my lack of pushyness): "Ok, well if there was one there before then put one back there"

Later that evening I look at old photos. No such light there. I email that to surveyor and he says he will pass on pic and message to Sparky's boss not to put up light there. Today I look out window and Sparky is up ladder preparing cable to put light there. So long convoluted discussion with Sparky getting shirty. His boss never passed on message. Other Sparky had a photo he took and that also shows no light there. But Sparky still insisted there was a light there. Arrgh.

His stroppyness is no doubt due to him having to redo one day's work where they put up garish white cable over the brickwork without asking us if we wanted black or white.



Surely if there is no evidence of a light being there then there wasnt a light there ?

"No ! there was a light there before even though there wasnt a light there before !"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 27 January, 2010, 01:23:52 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 January, 2010, 01:16:52 PM
ere is no evidence of a light being there then there wasnt a light there ?

"No ! there was a light there before even though there wasnt a light there before !"

Hate it when someone is really adamant that they are correct but turn out to be wrong. I just noticed they are running cable across the top wall of the car park wall even though I asked them to run it a bit lower so that it is not cut by the neighbours when they trim their hedges. It's armoured anyway. But I give up. I end up looking like a control freak but some of the other flat owners are real nit pickers and I am constantly trying to preempt their reactions.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 January, 2010, 01:35:11 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 27 January, 2010, 01:23:52 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 January, 2010, 01:16:52 PM
ere is no evidence of a light being there then there wasnt a light there ?

"No ! there was a light there before even though there wasnt a light there before !"

Hate it when someone is really adamant that they are correct but turn out to be wrong. I just noticed they are running cable across the top wall of the car park wall even though I asked them to run it a bit lower so that it is not cut by the neighbours when they trim their hedges. It's armoured anyway. But I give up. I end up looking like a control freak but some of the other flat owners are real nit pickers and I am constantly trying to preempt their reactions.

It seems to be one thing after another with that block that you live in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 27 January, 2010, 01:58:18 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 January, 2010, 01:35:11 PM
It seems to be one thing after another with that block that you live in.

Yes, it is. A few strong characters here make things very, very difficult. How I would love to have my own house so that we could live our own life. Out of the question round these parts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 January, 2010, 09:08:07 PM
I went out to see Avatar this evening, on my own because the wife didn't want to go and everybody else in the entire world has already seen it.

I was running late because my baby daughter puked on me just as I was about to leave, but one Superman style quick change later I headed out, swinging by the local shop on the way to buy a bag of Revels (I didn't want to have to re-mortgage my house so I could buy some from the cinema).

When I finally got to there the car park was rammed (stupid Orange Wednesday)and by the time I had orbited it several times and found a space, the film had been on for 10 minutes so I went home again  :(

Who wants to see a bunch of stupid lanky blue twats anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 January, 2010, 09:29:42 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 27 January, 2010, 09:08:07 PM
Who wants to see a bunch of stupid lanky blue twats anyway.

:lol:
I've just got back from "Sex and drugs and rock'n'roll" (which was fanbloodytastic), but the heating was broken in the cinema and it was freezing. I also have a tickly cough that probably made me the least popular person in there, however much Covonia I swigged.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2010, 10:24:46 PM
Sat at work for 90 mins and no job yet. I want to get out on the road so I can listen to the latest Dredd CD. Best the run is over an hour so I can listen to it in one hit.
Life is hard  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 January, 2010, 10:52:21 PM
I just flicked onto the I, Robot movie, where Wil Smith  was leaping off a motorbike accurately shooting marauding robots in the head with twin pistols as he sailed through the air.  Then his girlie turned up with a big machine gun and blasted another robot.  That woman was supposed to be Susan Calvin.  That just isn't right, why should I be accidentally exposed to this kind of thing?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 January, 2010, 11:22:18 PM
This is why.

QuoteAt lunchtime I bought a Star Wars 3 3/4" figure of Luke in his medical gown from the end of Empire Strikes Back. 

And then because he came with 1/6 of a 'build-a-droid' figure (the head, as it happens), I bought five more figures so I could get a seventh one 'free'.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 January, 2010, 11:41:08 PM
-sob- It's all true.  My financial support of mindless cinematic SF has encouraged even more mindless cinematic SF.  But hey, that Medical Gown Luke.  I regret nothing,
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 January, 2010, 06:21:43 PM
I got the complete A Bit of Fry and Laurie for Christmas, and disc 4 (of 5) wouldn't play at all on any device. I sent it back to Amazon and got a replacement. Exactly the same problem. Defective batch. I may give it a third go, or just ask for a refund.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 January, 2010, 06:36:05 PM
I was making my sarnies for work earlier and Sam came out to help me, how kind I thought. He helped get all the ingredients out of the fridge, some breaded ham, some grated cheese and the marge.
The problem was that he ate so much of the ham whilst I was spreading the marge that I only had enough ham for one sarnie, so I am having marmite in the other ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 28 January, 2010, 08:15:57 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 28 January, 2010, 06:21:43 PM
I got the complete A Bit of Fry and Laurie for Christmas, and disc 4 (of 5) wouldn't play at all on any device. I sent it back to Amazon and got a replacement. Exactly the same problem. Defective batch. I may give it a third go, or just ask for a refund.

I had the exact same problem with my Fry & Laurie box set, I would have sent it back but then the disc played perfectly in my other, slightly newer dvd player - infuriating doesn't come close
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 January, 2010, 08:23:40 PM
I used to have multiple problems with DVDs. My last player, despite happily playing absolutely anything I'd ever bought from around the world, whatever region, however old, absolutely refused to play anything that was released by Momentum Pictures.

Which was a pisser, as I'd just bought Terminator 2, Evil Dead 2, Prince of Darkness and They Live. All on the Momentum label.

I then had a lengthy correspondance with some guy at Momentum, trying to get him to explain exactly WHY his company was releasing DVDs that couldn't be played on a mid-range player, which was a top-seller from a major high-street chain store. His arrogance was at first amusing, then drove me mad. My last message to him, before I just gave up and bought a new player, consisted of the helpful advice to purchase said player for his testing department, and bloody use it.

SBT

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 29 January, 2010, 12:45:52 AM
I had a shave and now I look about 11.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 January, 2010, 01:13:59 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 29 January, 2010, 12:45:52 AM
I had a shave and now I look about 11.
Don't worry too much. It'll grow back twice as fast.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 January, 2010, 10:59:21 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 29 January, 2010, 01:13:59 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 29 January, 2010, 12:45:52 AM
I had a shave and now I look about 11.
Don't worry too much. It'll grow back twice as fast.

It don't half itch down there when it does though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 31 January, 2010, 10:34:32 PM
I made a mushroom risotto that would have been fantastic, except I forgot to put an Oxo cube in it. That would have made it perfect.

:|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2010, 10:38:34 PM
Lynx Africa strikes again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 31 January, 2010, 10:40:22 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2010, 10:38:34 PM
Lynx Africa strikes again.

You love it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 01 February, 2010, 11:53:14 AM
Oyster cards.

Don't insist people who don't live in London buy them instead of Travelcards, assume we know how to use the damn things - and then laugh at us when the barriers fail to open.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 February, 2010, 08:54:41 PM
I nearly had a row with a neighbour this morning. More to the point, she nearly reversed into my car.

::)

We both went out to defrost our windscreens at the same time. After she finished hers she sat at the wheel for ages with the front door of her house wide open. I presumed she must be going back in, or else her husband or son or whatever (she looks somewhat older than him) must have been about to come outside and get in the car with her. Anyway, she sat there faffing about and didn't seem to be going anywhere (in the end her husband or son or whatever came out of the house with a bicycle and shut the door behind him; he wasn't going in the car with her after all). She only switched her engine on after I'd started mine up and started turning my car around.

Her car was facing out of the street, so all she had to do was swing out and pull forward. My car was facing into the street, so I had to execute a 3-point turn to face the right way to get out. I swung my car around left and pulled across the street at a right angle, into the space behind her, to reverse back to my side of the road again. As soon as I've drawn up level with the back of her car, still going forward, she starts reversing! I couldn't have anticipated that, because she's got an empty road right in front of her, and forward is the only way she can get out of our street.

I can't do anything at all to stop her hitting me; it's all down to her. I can't go forward because then I'll present a bigger target. I can't go backward because by the time I've selected reverse gear and put my foot on the accelerator she'll have hit me. So I just put my hand on the horn and leant on it. No reaction - she continued reversing toward me. When someone sounds a loud and persistent warning you do not just blithely carry on, but she did. So I took my hand off the horn and slammed down on it again. This time she stopped. Panic over. Collision, needless damage and row averted.

I reversed back over to my side of the street, turned my car around to face out, and went over and waved at her and spoke in through her window. "I'm so glad you saw me. That was very close," I said, good naturedly.

"I thought you were going to stop." She replied, making no sense. It wasn't me that needed to stop; I had stopped. It was her car that had been moving toward a collision.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 02 February, 2010, 10:36:41 AM
I have FIVE biros on my desk and not one of the buggers will write. There is loads of ink in all of them right up to the top. I have been doing that thing where you vigorously roll them between your hands to get the ink flowing but its not working. Ive been scribbling like a maniac over blank sheets of paper for ten minutes with them all and THEY WONT WRITE!!!

Whats up with that? Asshole pens!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 February, 2010, 10:57:19 AM
Quote from: Van Dom on 02 February, 2010, 10:36:41 AM
I have FIVE biros on my desk and not one of the buggers will write.

This is what happens when they effectively cancel the space programme.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 02 February, 2010, 11:42:56 AM
When artists who commit to a strip suddenly turn into flakes and you end up having to wait over 18 months for an episode and then they drop you right in it by telling you they can no longer be sure they can find time!

GAH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 02 February, 2010, 12:57:17 PM
I'm assuming said artist isn't part of this forum?? Or is this a subversive form of embarrassment?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 02 February, 2010, 01:12:10 PM
No, he's not, thankfully- as otherwise I'd probably have more to say on the subject.

However, there is a Knight on this very board who has stepped up to the plate and filled the gap. Not by taking over on the strip- though I 'do' have plans for that- but by delivering his strip early!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 02 February, 2010, 01:41:45 PM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 02 February, 2010, 01:12:10 PM
No, he's not, thankfully- as otherwise I'd probably have more to say on the subject.

However, there is a Knight on this very board who has stepped up to the plate and filled the gap. Not by taking over on the strip- though I 'do' have plans for that- but by delivering his strip early!

Woo-hoo!
And it's good news for me either way!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: satchmo on 02 February, 2010, 07:13:53 PM
Call Centre monkey: speak to my girlfriend like that again and I'll email you a punch in the fucking face  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 02 February, 2010, 07:41:06 PM
What if it's a pregnant lady and because she was a thalidomide baby her womb is in her face?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 February, 2010, 09:22:43 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 02 February, 2010, 07:41:06 PM
What if it's a pregnant lady and because she was a thalidomide baby her womb is in her face?

That doesn't happen, horrid boy. You're thinking of atomic radiation; I saw it in Strontium Dog.

Quote from: Van Dom on 02 February, 2010, 10:36:41 AM
I have FIVE biros on my desk and not one of the buggers will write.

I'm familiar with that situation. The answer is: that's too many ballpoint pens. If you store them too long they dry up. They don't have an indefinite shelf life. I bought bulk once because it was cheap. The ones I used straight away were fine. None of the ones that got stored and ignored while home improvements went on worked at all when they got found again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 02 February, 2010, 09:34:07 PM
Ahh, that'll be it then!  :-[


Don't worry, I'm switching back to coloured pencils, just nicked a box of my daughters and threw it in my office bag! Can't go wrong with coloured Hello Kitty pencils!

(No, I won't be embarrassed sitting in a meeting writing with a coloured Hello Kitty pencil. I'll be wearing my Scooby Doo t-shirt, see, and eating my lunch from my Mickey Mouse lunchbox!!!!! :lol:)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 02 February, 2010, 10:16:45 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 02 February, 2010, 07:41:06 PM
What if it's a pregnant lady and because she was a thalidomide baby her womb is in her face?

I probably could have shot that joke with trunc-quilizers and it would still would have worked. But my 5 have elapsed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 February, 2010, 03:40:02 AM
Damn, I can't believe I missed Jordans wedding to that angry dresser in Las Vegas.
I wonder who wore the bridal gown.
Perhaps my invite was lost in the post.

I'll give it 18 months  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 February, 2010, 04:59:50 PM
I tried watching the weekly double bill of Apprentice (USA) last night. I know it's full of annoying overconfident people whose main qualification is being cocksure, but it's a bit of a guilty pleasure of mine and I look forward to it. I got through about 20mins and then woke up 3am on the sofa with the imaginary block of concrete on me that makes getting up and going to bed a Herculean task.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 06 February, 2010, 02:56:10 PM
I stopped off at the village shop for some bread on my way home from work today and then walked the half a mile home only to realise my car was still parked outside the shop :-[.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 06 February, 2010, 03:08:34 PM
BWAAH-HAA-HAA-HAA! Classic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 February, 2010, 03:42:13 PM
My mum used to leave me in the pram outside the local co-op when shopping and forget I was there and go home. Cue phonecalls from people in the shop who'd got rather used to her doing this kind of thing. Baby brain much?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 06 February, 2010, 03:44:00 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 06 February, 2010, 03:42:13 PM
My mum used to leave me in the pram outside the local co-op when shopping and forget I was there and go home. Cue phonecalls from people in the shop who'd got rather used to her doing this kind of thing. Baby brain much?

So are you sure it was your mum who came to collect you or was it just someone who wanted a better pram?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 06 February, 2010, 03:46:03 PM
That happened to my brother loads too, SG.

It would've happened to me too, except my brother was always there to remind her.  My mum had a shocking memory.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 February, 2010, 08:19:50 PM
Of potential interest to staticgirl:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8491493.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8491493.stm)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 February, 2010, 08:28:33 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 06 February, 2010, 03:44:00 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 06 February, 2010, 03:42:13 PM
My mum used to leave me in the pram outside the local co-op when shopping and forget I was there and go home. Cue phonecalls from people in the shop who'd got rather used to her doing this kind of thing. Baby brain much?

So are you sure it was your mum who came to collect you or was it just someone who wanted a better pram?
I'm happy to say I have photgraphic proof I was replaced in the same family home I came from. You can't fake those mad staring eyes... :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 February, 2010, 09:14:57 PM
Having forgotten to put an oxo in Sunday's risotto, I sabotaged tonight's quorn fillet salsa (tastes likje chicken!) by forgetting not to put an oxo cube in it! Damn. Note to self: no oxo cube in the salsa. Otherwise too salty and yuk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 06 February, 2010, 11:50:40 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 06 February, 2010, 03:42:13 PM
My mum used to leave me in the pram outside the local co-op when shopping and forget I was there and go home. Cue phonecalls from people in the shop who'd got rather used to her doing this kind of thing. Baby brain much?

That's quite shocking and scary. If my wife did that she would get a serious slap. I've had dreams of doing that and instantly wake up sweating and upset.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 07 February, 2010, 11:37:56 AM
Small village with pretensions of being a town plus it was the early 70s.  Everyone knew everyone then and I wasn't in danger. I'd be more scared if it happened nowadays because the place really is a town now and we don't know everyone anymore....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 February, 2010, 08:04:36 AM
We've planned on going to London on Thursday for Sam's 11th Birthday.
What do I see on the weather forecast a few moments ago, 10 INCHES of snow for the South East on Thursday. Now it doesn't worry me but I'm sure that chaos will ensue as we try to have a fun day out, that is of course if London isn't closed for the day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 09 February, 2010, 12:03:37 PM
Mmmmm.

That is sucky.  Hope it's wrong or at least not applicable to the places you're going.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 09 February, 2010, 04:16:44 PM
Doubt it'll be that bad in London, Kent maybe. Some of Kent is higher and gets caught by the wind off the sea....

have a look here - http://www.metcheck.com/V40/UK/FREE/14days.asp?zipcode=London
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 09 February, 2010, 10:05:42 PM
I've just heard that the tutor who took over the class I used to teach this evening of the week got lynched on his first lesson. What an ungrateful bunch. A pity for the students who attended because they wanted to learn something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 February, 2010, 10:12:33 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 09 February, 2010, 10:05:42 PM
I've just heard that the tutor who took over the class I used to teach this evening of the week got lynched on his first lesson.

Tough room.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 February, 2010, 10:15:45 PM
Drinking milk straight after eating chocolate isn't the exemplary experience one might expect it to be at the outset. Although minor fatigue may have been the third* ingredient.



*Of course, what I mean here is that it is the most obvious noumenal distraction and one that is sufficently noteworthy to be of note on this particular not-light.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 February, 2010, 04:58:03 PM
After 17 years of occupancy and on the final day of a month of refurbishment work, the workmen have decided that there may be asbestos in our hall floor after all, and have advised us not to spend the night in the flat. This is despite them carrying out an asbestos survey before the work started which gave us the all clear. Figure I'll take my life in my hands and risk it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 February, 2010, 08:58:07 PM
Well, there're different types of asbestos, aren't there? Some of it won't harm you if you just leave it alone and seal it in.

My back bedroom ceiling was done with artex, which contained asbestos back in the day. I chipped the spikes off with a trowel and got my plasterer to skim it over.




*cough*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 February, 2010, 09:21:55 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 11 February, 2010, 08:58:07 PM
Well, there're different types of asbestos, aren't there? Some of it won't harm you if you just leave it alone and seal it in.

My back bedroom ceiling was done with artex, which contained asbestos back in the day. I chipped the spikes off with a trowel and got my plasterer to skim it over.




*cough*

Its what you call blue asbestos that is the carcinogenic type that you usually find in industrial buildings or pipe lagging  and that kind of thing which is naturally very dusty/fibrous whereas the type that you come across in flat sheets in domestic situations is harmless even if you remove it yourself which i have done but councils dont discriminate.

Top tip for Artex removal: Providing it hasnt been painted with an oil based to paint is to use a wallpaper stripper on it.Hold the plate over the artex as you would with wallpaper and the steam penetrates the artex and softens it so you just scrape it off and because it is moist there is no dust.

Easy !!

Its vile stuff Artex especially when its combed where you get those half circles of concentric circles. :sick: or else in older houses its used to hide uneven or rough old plaster.I couldnt live with Artex as i hate it.Artex usually contains Gypsum as i havent ever heard of it containing asbestos.Vile shit whatever its made of.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 February, 2010, 11:38:50 PM
I saw these in the London Dungeon and there were no Dredd ones, yes I'll buy any old tat. Someone make me a 2000AD collection of characters like these, NOW!

(http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t136/commandoforces/2000ad%20Sites/P2110338.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2010, 06:12:18 AM
Nice!  Second from the left, Is that... Zombie Jack Nicholson?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 February, 2010, 08:21:34 AM
That one threw me until I picked it up and had a good look. I reckon it's Blade.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 February, 2010, 10:09:50 AM
On checking the London spend, I seem to have spent just under £300, yes £300 on a bloody day out. I can't believe it, I could have put that towards lots of 2000AD figures and stuff when they all start to hit the shelves.

Still I suppose I should spend some money on the family now and again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 February, 2010, 01:27:34 PM
My computer seems to have died. Blue screen of death every time it tries to load windows. Spent all last night running long hardware diagnostics from the boot menu, all passed OK but the fecker still won't open  - in normal mode, in safe mode or even "at last good configuration" mode.

Since XP was pre-installed when I bought it, I can't even reformat and reload windows. Arse. Will be popping in to te forum at work, but may not be around as much as normal in the coming weeks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 12 February, 2010, 04:20:41 PM
ooh that's a bugger... load ubuntu os for now?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2010, 04:24:20 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 12 February, 2010, 04:20:41 PM
ooh that's a bugger... load ubuntu os for now?

(http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/not_really_into_pokemon.png)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 13 February, 2010, 02:50:29 AM
NEW BOSS, NEW RULES, no time to be here recently.
on top of hte changes now, and i like the new boss,
but it has been a minor impediment not making the effort to come here and smile. share and laugh. damn i missed it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 February, 2010, 07:59:29 AM
Welcome back DD!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 February, 2010, 08:18:10 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 12 February, 2010, 04:20:41 PM
ooh that's a bugger... load ubuntu os for now?

Is it possible to load something when you don't have a working OS to start with? All this is way over my head. All i know is I switch it on and it don't work!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 February, 2010, 11:06:59 AM
Damn. Now that it's not raining or snowing I am in the garden finishing off the fortified installation for the two remaining girls. Once this is finished we will get some more as the fox that killed Elsie won't be visiting again (story for Hell-Trek) and there will be no weak points.
For a start the missus will lock the buggers up when they are put to bed  ::)
Must crack on as this doing nothing is making me cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 13 February, 2010, 01:04:28 PM
I was sitting with my 4 year old daughter doing colouring in while my 6 month old was crawling around under the table. I looked down to see the baby holding a purple felt tip that she had managed to get the lid off and draw a joker smile on her face with while she tried to suck it. It is proving tough to get off and I have to go out with her in about half an hour.

I'm a terrible parent  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 February, 2010, 03:41:40 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 06 February, 2010, 09:14:57 PM
quorn fillet salsa (tastes likje chicken!)

Bloody doesn't! Against my better judgement, I let my girlfriend get some of these fetid articles recently and serve 'em up for tea. I'd say they lie considerably closer to soggy MDF than chicken on the taste chart. Blecch!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 February, 2010, 03:50:08 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 13 February, 2010, 03:41:40 PM
Against my better judgement, I let my girlfriend get some of these fetid articles recently and serve 'em up for tea. I'd say they lie considerably closer to soggy MDF than chicken on the taste chart. Blecch!

I'm not convinced she can cook.  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 February, 2010, 04:43:52 PM
The missus cooked up a quorn korma t'other night and it was all kinds of scrummy.  In my long veggie years I'd grown quite tired of quorn (although I never tired, nor yet tire, of beanfeast, undisputed king of the rehydratables), but I really enjoy it as an option now.  Also, have wife now, better cook than I.  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Nap Normal on 13 February, 2010, 05:20:31 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 February, 2010, 03:50:08 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 13 February, 2010, 03:41:40 PM
Against my better judgement, I let my girlfriend get some of these fetid articles recently and serve 'em up for tea. I'd say they lie considerably closer to soggy MDF than chicken on the taste chart. Blecch!

I'm not convinced she can cook.  :-\


Comedy gold.
Take a bow to rapturous applause HoU.
I salute your comedy wit.
Bw
Jay
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 February, 2010, 12:15:13 AM
I just had a bout of garlic bread diahrrea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 February, 2010, 12:30:11 AM
I'm not convinced such a thing even exists. Was it diagnosed by Gillian McKeith?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 February, 2010, 01:10:32 AM
I ate some garlic bread that expired on Wednesday. Minutes later the torrents. Eighty pages later Albertine was still dead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 February, 2010, 11:43:10 AM
I have to put the laptop away until after Sam's party so that means I won't be able to get back online until after 22:00 ::)

Then again I may have a wee look on the phone when I occasionally pop down the cellar ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 February, 2010, 03:47:01 PM
So we finally got to the end of Empire Strikes Back after several abortive attempts, since while loving Hoth the Boy has previously found the cave on Dagobah to be a bridge too far, having developed a healthy terror of Darth Vader in the opening seconds of Star Wars.  Today he watched the 'No, I am your father' bit for the first time in rapt silence, and we wondered whether he, a huge fan of Clone Wars cartoon-version Anakin Skywalker, would pick up on what was going on.    

Now he won't go for a nap because he keeps dreaming he's turning into Darth Vader.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 February, 2010, 03:55:38 PM
I am so very sorry to hear you broke your kid with too much Star Wars. Good job you've got at least one spare!

:o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 February, 2010, 04:03:50 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 14 February, 2010, 03:55:38 PM
I am so very sorry to hear you broke your kid with too much Star Wars.

Too much Star Wars... or not enough?  Onward to redemption, it's the only way...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 February, 2010, 09:51:11 PM
You are not trying hard enough tord. Strap him to the settee and use matchsticks on the eyes. Works for my son.








V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 15 February, 2010, 09:55:09 PM
Tord, you should get audiobooks and put headphones on him when hes asleep, he is obviously not getting enough exposure.

David
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 February, 2010, 10:03:51 PM
QuoteTord, you should get audiobooks and put headphones on him when hes asleep

Lads, you must figure me for some kind of lightweight - I'm way ahead of you. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 February, 2010, 09:13:01 AM
At least Penny Arcade understands.

(http://art.penny-arcade.com/photos/786981234_u3TZK-L.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 February, 2010, 10:14:43 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 16 February, 2010, 09:13:01 AM
At least Penny Arcade understands.

(http://art.penny-arcade.com/photos/786981234_u3TZK-L.jpg)

That's awesome!

And of course, there's the Cam Kennedy Star Wars art on the HiEx auction- just imagine how much your children would like that, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 February, 2010, 10:28:18 AM
Honestly your lordship, I don't know how you do it, such relentless pimpery!   There's nothing I they would like more than Cam Kennedy art, it is the best Star Wars art since Ralph McQuarrie and Joe Johnston, and the best Star Wars comic art of all.  Satisfied?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 February, 2010, 10:34:09 AM
Quotedon't know how you do it

It's for the children!

QuoteSatisfied?

For now... but there are a few weeks to go yet before the con...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 16 February, 2010, 10:35:47 AM
becuase despite clear explanation. i still got the pic uploads all wrong.
got it now i think. thanks board.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 February, 2010, 02:46:22 PM
DROKK!

The postie has left a calling card from when he did a very weak knock at the door at 10:55.
Now this is either the next Mongoose book or my Hi-Ex! Hell-Trekker chocolates. Shall I drive to the sorting office just before it shuts at 19:00 or leave it till I finish work in the morning and collect the package then. What do you think  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 16 February, 2010, 02:48:27 PM
I think you already know what you're doing, don't you!!!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 February, 2010, 02:54:27 PM
Yes, I can't help it. If it's not one of those two things I will be quite annoyed as those are the only items I'm expecting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 February, 2010, 07:03:11 PM
Bollocks >:(

Just got back and they couldn't find it so I'll have to go back in the morning after work.
I nearly lost my rag when the person said, "have you checked that it wasn't left with the neighbours"
I replied quite calmly "It doesn't say that on the card!"

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrggghhhhh!!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 16 February, 2010, 10:51:35 PM
I just sat down to watch Star Trek and it skipped so badly I couldn't.

I only rented it in the first place because the sole copy of The Good, The Bad, The Weird in the video shop had been returned without the actual feature disc in the box.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 February, 2010, 12:09:59 AM
Reminds me of the time in 1991 I hired Reanimator for £1.00 from the video store and the tape was too fucked up to watch. When I took it back the spotty teenager in temporary charge offered me my money back or an alternative. I chose Reanimator II. "That's 50p extra," he said. Some alternative!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 17 February, 2010, 09:16:20 PM
I paid £50 towards talk talk account at Barclays. I phoned talk talk. They say they've recieved no such payment. They have a new account with HSBC. Having closed the account, talk talk tell me the bank should have told me the account closed. I return to the bank to find out who is accountable. The bank say its in a talk talk account of some remuneration. I phone talk talk again. Its customer services are being repaired til 22nd of Feb.
I give up. Cold, cold business.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 22 February, 2010, 07:04:52 PM
I've just caught the lead of the external terrabyte hard drive I keep all my artwork on, sending the hard drive itself towards the floor. These things aren't designed to bounce, it turns out. 

This isn't filed under a Life Spugs post as there are folks on here with more important things to be worried about, and I know a man who can fix these wonders of technology (or at least rescue some of the basic data). That, and I'm about as far from any deadlines as I could possibly be today.

But I think all the finished artwork I've done this year may have gone to the great drawing board in the sky. Harrumph.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 February, 2010, 07:06:31 PM
I found somebody's dentures in my coat pocket.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 February, 2010, 07:08:27 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 February, 2010, 07:06:31 PM
I found somebody's dentures in my coat pocket.

Granny shagging again Roger ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: the shutdown man on 23 February, 2010, 10:07:04 AM
I went to see a special showing of Raiders of the Lost Ark last night. Around the point where Indy is digging into the Well of Souls, the film suddenly jumped forward to the scene with the plane burning on the runway, skipping about twenty minutes, maybe more. It then continued on for a bit, with the chase scene with the trucks, and then cut off completely. We sat there for about half an hour while they tried to fix it but evetually gave up and went home. They gave us replacement tickets at least.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 February, 2010, 11:15:27 AM
That's quite sucky.

When I went to see Titanic the film cut out for about 10 minutes. When it resumed with a chunk missing I got up and walked out and asked for tickets for the next showing, but over 100 people just sat there complacently and watched to the end. I guess they figured they weren't really missing anything and that life's too short to sit through the first hour of Titanic a second time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 February, 2010, 12:33:55 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 16 February, 2010, 10:51:35 PM
I just sat down to watch Star Trek and it skipped so badly I couldn't.

I only rented it in the first place because the sole copy of The Good, The Bad, The Weird in the video shop had been returned without the actual feature disc in the box.

I had this same problem last night when i attempted to watch The Pianist.First of all i washed the disc to wash off dirty fingerprints and various other substances but it didnt help the problem as the disc was also scratched.This really pissed me off because i just dont understand how DVDs end up in this state when all you have to do is remove the disc from its case holding it by the edge and then place it into the drawer of the DVD player.There is no need at anytime to touch the surface of the disc or use it as a drinks coaster or sand the floor with it or use it as a frisbee.

It fucking annoys me when this happens especially when the shop is hiring out substandard discs.They should now better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 23 February, 2010, 12:40:47 PM
Do you remember when CDs first came out and we were told they were indestructible? What a laff! Even if they don't get scratched, I read that those early CDs had used an ink or plastic that degraded and would only last about 10 years anyway!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 February, 2010, 01:19:28 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 23 February, 2010, 12:40:47 PM
Do you remember when CDs first came out and we were told they were indestructible? What a laff! Even if they don't get scratched, I read that those early CDs had used an ink or plastic that degraded and would only last about 10 years anyway!

I remember that claim very well.You can bend and snap them in half so they are hardly indestructable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 February, 2010, 01:34:33 PM
I remember being very suspicious of CDs in the mid-1980s because of the unit cost and the small surface area for sleeve artwork, and space considerations, because the jewel case was double the width of a long player record sleeve.

I bought a midi system in 1987, which, of course, came with an external CD player which sat underneath. Apart from All About Eve in 1988, and Disintegration by The Cure in 1989, and upgrading a couple of Sisters of Mercy albums, I continued to buy vinyl until I went to university with a JVC portable CD player and no record player.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2010, 06:33:38 PM
I asked an ebay seller in France if he was prepared to post what he is selling to the UK.
I received his reply earlier and here it is for all to marvel at:-

'GOOD NIGHT COMES TO SEARCH IT HER WILL MAKE YOU VACATION ' :o :-\ :crazy:   

I have sent a polite reply to see if that means Yes!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2010, 07:13:24 PM
Well I won't be buying this item, as his answer is this:-

'I DO NOT SEE CODAY MAKING GROWTH UNE LIVRAISON LE INTERVENTION AT HOME COME TO SEARCH IT HER DOMICILE WILL MAKE DES VACANCES' ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 February, 2010, 07:20:21 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2010, 07:13:24 PM

'I DO NOT SEE CODAY MAKING GROWTH UNE LIVRAISON LE INTERVENTION AT HOME COME TO SEARCH IT HER DOMICILE WILL MAKE DES VACANCES' ::)

Time to earn your pay Cyberleader2000 - we need a translation!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 23 February, 2010, 09:04:09 PM
Pick it up when you come to France on your holidays.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 February, 2010, 09:19:39 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2010, 07:13:24 PM
Well I won't be buying this item, as his answer is this:-

'I DO NOT SEE CODAY MAKING GROWTH UNE LIVRAISON LE INTERVENTION AT HOME COME TO SEARCH IT HER DOMICILE WILL MAKE DES VACANCES' ::)

Not sure if French or English is their first or even second language.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 February, 2010, 09:20:29 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 23 February, 2010, 09:04:09 PM
Pick it up when you come to France on your holidays.

Oooh, well done The Cosh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 23 February, 2010, 09:48:13 PM
I thought CF would already have a manual for his Judge Dredd pinball machine...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 February, 2010, 06:06:54 PM
Nooo!  I've just discovered my Lithuanian neighbours are moving out!  No more work and they're heading back home.  My lovely quiet clean helpful friendly non-nosey but most importantly tolerant neighbours!  Four years of peace and amicability coming to an end.  What twisted circus freaks will replace them behind the paper-thin walls I dread to think.  F**k this recession, just f**k it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 February, 2010, 06:23:19 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 23 February, 2010, 09:48:13 PM
I thought CF would already have a manual for his Judge Dredd pinball machine...

I have the manual, just not the thing itself. After a lot of emails about dimensions and how it can be taken apart (not from this loon, I must add) to get round the corner at the bottom of the stairs and into the cellar, I still don't know if it'll fit.
The starting price on this was worth a punt as if I can't get it in there it would live in the conservatory until I sort the shed out and then be placed in there.
I may give him one more email and use an online translater to say "WILL YOU SEND THIS TO ENGLAND, YES OR NO?" and see what happens. I thought about just writing L'angleterre Oui or non? but God knows if he'd understand that!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 February, 2010, 06:43:05 PM
You should enlist the help of Garth Ennis to write the email. He's good at making up French!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 25 February, 2010, 02:52:02 PM
When I unplugged the USB cable from my phone last night, the USB socket came with it. The socket is now attached to the end of the plug, and my handset has a big hole in the side where the USB socket used to be.

No more data transfer then, but the phone still seems to work...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 25 February, 2010, 08:18:19 PM
I'm having to do performance reviews for the assembly team I run at work. It's amazing how defensive some people can get at the mention of the word "performance".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 February, 2010, 11:04:50 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 24 February, 2010, 06:06:54 PM
Nooo!  I've just discovered my Lithuanian neighbours are moving out!  No more work and they're heading back home.  My lovely quiet clean helpful friendly non-nosey but most importantly tolerant neighbours!  Four years of peace and amicability coming to an end.  What twisted circus freaks will replace them behind the paper-thin walls I dread to think.  F**k this recession, just f**k it.

What have I told you about not notswearing?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 February, 2010, 12:39:40 AM
I had a day of work sick this week, and have felt pretty tired all round, both during and following my recuperation. As a result I dropped my (really old) phone as I was leaving work today and it broke. It won't switch back on again and I'll have to buy a new one.

I'm just glad it didn't fall down the drain I was passing when it leapt out of my hand!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 February, 2010, 12:46:45 AM
Why? Then you would have saved the time you spent urgently stabbing buttons trying to get it come back on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 26 February, 2010, 01:27:29 AM
It's half one in the morning and I've only just finished writing my blurb for tomorrow night's compering gig for the local choir.  I've not even had time to run it through.  Not exactly rock and roll lifestyle but, what the heck.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 26 February, 2010, 07:40:13 AM
The cans and plastic bottles recycling bin just blew over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 26 February, 2010, 09:10:26 AM
This doesn't happen often, so I shall savour the moment:

QuoteI had a day off work sick this week
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 February, 2010, 10:32:04 AM
Or:

Quote from: House of Usher on 26 February, 2010, 12:39:40 AM
I had a day of work, sick, this week, and have felt pretty tired all round...

He might just have worked one day, while sick.  Ugly sentence, but you know Usher, he's all about  the sloppy grammar.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 26 February, 2010, 03:21:03 PM
A while ago I bought a figurine of Frazetta's Sea Witch for a few euro in a bargain shop

I remember at the time thinking it's not worth much so I may as well throw away the box

Now I find that it was a limited edition and is now worth over ten times what I paid for it-- if it's in its original box


damn it

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 February, 2010, 04:16:18 PM
My street has permit parking, well the bottom half does, where I live. This year the council are making us pay £25 to have our permits. I popped into the offices earlier and asked them why I should pay when only half the street has the bayed areas. A load of bollocks came back.
I then asked how many permits have they issued as there is only room for about 40 cars. She wouldn't say, so I said I'm going through the freedom of information act to find out, as I reckon they will flog at least double the amount of spaces available.
Finally I said you can stuff it, as I will just park 100 yards up the street from now on and if you make that permit parking (which I doubt they will) I would rather pay a thousand pounds to make the front of my house have a drive than give this corrupt council £25 (it has one but the previous owners put a large planter there and we just left it there but she doesn't know that).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 27 February, 2010, 04:08:48 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 23 February, 2010, 11:15:27 AM
That's quite sucky.

When I went to see Titanic the film cut out for about 10 minutes. When it resumed with a chunk missing I got up and walked out and asked for tickets for the next showing, but over 100 people just sat there complacently and watched to the end. I guess they figured they weren't really missing anything and that life's too short to sit through the first hour of Titanic a second time.
Or indeed the first time. 

I'd call it a lucky escape.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 February, 2010, 12:47:47 PM
Quote from: His Lordship rac on 26 February, 2010, 09:10:26 AM
This doesn't happen often, so I shall savour the moment:

QuoteI had a day off work sick this week

Quote from: TordelBack on 26 February, 2010, 10:32:04 AM
Or:

Quote from: House of Usher on 26 February, 2010, 12:39:40 AM
I had a day of work, sick, this week, and have felt pretty tired all round...

He might just have worked one day, while sick.  Ugly sentence, but you know Usher, he's all about  the sloppy grammar.

Ha! You rotten sods. In my defence, I've not been well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 February, 2010, 07:34:31 PM
My bike has a broken pedal.The spindle that the bearings of the pedal run on is seized up so it wont loosen.I took the bike into a bikeshop to sse if they could help.They were saying that if the spindle wont loosen then it would be a more expensive job to drill it out and and rethread a new spindle or possibly replace the chainset as well.They said something about replacing the crankshaft although the crankshaft has nothing to do with the pedals  :-*

Anyway to save all that i suggested just leaving the the old spindle in place and fit a new pedal onto the existing spindle to save money and time.

"OH NO We would be unwilling to do that" but they would not explain WHY they wouldnt do it but they said something about not wanting to mix and match.

How does this make any sense ?

They are contradicting themselves as they didnt object to mixing and matching a new chainset onto an old bike and creating more work but they wont do the easiest option which is what i asked for so since they wont do what i ask then i will borrow a sprocket set and do it myself.Natrually if i am paying someone to do a job then they do what i say without question.I dont have any time for twatting about with idiots like this and especially not over a twenty minute job but it seems like i was wasting my own time by even asking.

The guy in the shop was a Twat and one of those types who smile at you while being offhand which made it worse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 February, 2010, 08:54:34 PM
Tumble Dryer died today so off to get a new one tomorrow. Just looking on Comet site and most expensive one is £669, for a fucking tumble dryer.
Sod that I'll go up to about £200, some people have more money than sense (and that's coming from me) what sort of hot air and tumble action do you get for an extra 469 quid. Jesus this cheap old one we have now lasted 11 years.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 February, 2010, 08:02:10 AM
Less money spent of a dryer the more for 2k stuff.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 February, 2010, 09:42:36 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 February, 2010, 08:54:34 PM
... what sort of hot air and tumble action do you get for an extra 469 quid

That's the thing about tumble-driers.  Most white goods push their upper-price models on energy efficiency, you can expect an extra 50-100 per grade, allegedly recouped with interest over the unit's life. But with tumble-driers it's almost senseless- they're about 3-4kWh per cycle - the only real differences seem to be condensor/vent, a choice basically made for you by the layout of your home.  

If you're using one more than once in a blue moon you don't probably care about 'leccy bills (or have threatened the meter reader into complicity  ;)), or CO2 emissions or owt like that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 February, 2010, 05:41:57 PM
Tumble Dryer bought  :'( it cost £200 but had a £10 saving and if you bought and collected it on the web you could save another 10% by entering a special code. So I paid £170.99 which I took from the house fund and not the Dredd fund ;)

Took old one to the dump and did a Slaine on it, lifted it above my head and threw it down onto the concrete 20 ft below, just to see it smash to pieces, very theraputic indeed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 February, 2010, 05:54:22 PM
Grrr, my brother-in-law's stag do is on the same night as his fiancée's... which the missus has already booked into.  And I just discovered there's a sailing boat involved!  (I love boats)  So instead of debauchery on the high seas I'm on childcare duties.  Looks like it's another night of exposing myself on Chatroulette then...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 February, 2010, 07:10:17 PM
Ah well, never mind - I've never been on a stag do, so you've probably been on more than I have. And you can go sailing any time!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 February, 2010, 07:12:34 PM
As of tomorrow I will be parking up the street as I won't give my council £25 for a parking permit, Fuck 'em!
17 years living here and getting one free each year and just because they mess everything up that they touch and put our money into Icelandic banks and god knows what else, they have to make the little people pay. Well not me, I'll walk those 100 yards to my house and park in those bays when I'm allowed to.
That's £25 that I could be spending on 2000AD stuff, how dare they >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 February, 2010, 07:18:33 PM
Since they introduced the parking permit scheme (which I was opposed to), parking has never been easier, now that all the neighbours who wouldn't buy one have to scrabble for whatever's left of the unmarked spaces!

:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 February, 2010, 07:25:24 PM
Ah! but you see we have a drive but the previous owners of the house put a large planter at the end next to the pavement. So if I get pissed off I will rip that to pieces and voila, a private drive for my piece of crap and the best bit. Double yellow outside the house so no-one can block me in.
I just will not give any government or council any money that I don't have to, the thieving bastards >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 February, 2010, 07:37:57 PM
Poor old TB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 February, 2010, 07:39:02 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 28 February, 2010, 07:10:17 PM
Ah well, never mind - I've never been on a stag do, so you've probably been on more than I have. And you can go sailing any time!

Sadly all the stag affairs I've been at have been horrendously dull*, I was hoping for better since round our way the impending nuptials in question have been awarded the unaffectionate title of Wedding of the Century due to the amount of blood-pressure inducing micro-management and unfathomable expense involved.  While this only makes me cringe in the context of a wedding, the idea of this kind of logistical overkill being applied to a stag party definitely appeals.



*So much so that when once admitting to an off-duty stripper that I had never seen her profession in action, she wrongly concluded that I'd never been to a stag party...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 February, 2010, 07:42:18 PM
Stag dos are horribly dull OR terrifyingly full of action.  There is no other kind.  You're best off at home, kids in bed, nomming a packet of monster munch with a pint in front of a flick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 February, 2010, 07:45:11 PM
What was wrong with the old style stag do's getting pissed down the town and then going to bed.
Nowadays it's all about trips to Prague, paintballing, go-karting, etc.... I thought Stag Do = BOOZE ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 February, 2010, 07:49:46 PM
My brother's stag do (which I organised aged 20 as best man and by far the youngest, least boozy person present) was simple.

6pm - meal at decent steakhouse.
7.30pm - first pub
9pm - second pub
11pm - club
1:30am - unexpected hospital visit after I accidentally broke the leg of the brother of the bride.  Whoops.
2am - drinking bottles of beer in casualty with him while he assured me there was nothing to worry about.

And two days later there was an usher with a full leg cast and a pair of crutches.  Nobody in her family knows the TRUE cause of the injury to this day.  Except those who were there.  What happens in Watford STAYS in Watford.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 February, 2010, 07:55:28 PM
Yeah, the booze kind are the only ones I've been to - and I think I've only enjoyed two of those, and one was a girl's (although explicitly not a Hen party, as it was just her and her male friends, which was actually very funny).  My better half actually has the worst part of the deal, as she's off to a 'spa hotel' - and while an affectionate veteran of the central European concept of a spa (unisex, keks off, into the scalding hot water then straight into the scalding cold water), she's dreading the rural Irish version, which seems to favour 'wraps' and pedicures.  She also didn't appreciate me reminding her that she didn't care for facials either, fnar fnar.

Anyway, it's all good, as I have just signed up for a day's pre-season dinghy racing in protest.  Hurrah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 28 February, 2010, 07:59:53 PM
Facials are good for girls.  tightens their... pores?  Pro V?  Vanish stain remover?

Nah, got nothing.  But that sort of thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 01:49:59 PM
I just filled out an application form for that BBC show 'Total Wipeout' and you have to go along to auditions if selected, AUDITIONS, that's me buggered then, I'm too competitive so they won't like me ::)

I had to laugh as one bit say this "We have a very busy schedule while recording the programme in Argentina. Please do not apply if your main motivation is a free trip to Buenos Aires as unfortunately you won't get to see much of it!"

BOLLOCKS!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 01:59:44 PM
Why not go on the one with the wall then.  Whatever that's called.  No free trip, but imagine the plaudits and praise of your fellow man.

Or try out for Ninja Warrior?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 02:09:45 PM
Sam would love to see me on Ninja Warrior or Takeshi's Castle as he laughs his head off watching those. I also laugh my head off, with him!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 02:12:26 PM
Favourites of mine too.  Love it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 02 March, 2010, 03:12:22 PM
Hurrah! I love Total Wipeout! Here's to hoping you're on it, CF!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 02 March, 2010, 03:34:56 PM
Great stuff, hope you make it on! You'll have to wear a 2000ad t-shirt! :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2010, 04:11:22 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 01:49:59 PM
I just filled out an application form for that BBC show 'Total Wipeout' and you have to go along to auditions if selected, AUDITIONS, that's me buggered then

It seems to me from watching it is that the way to get chosen is to act like a loud-mouthed self-deluded idiot, preferably with a twattish slogan and/or gesture that you can shout repeatedly. Loads of whoops and YEAHs also seem mandatory.

Oh and if you get a chance, give that Hammond a slap for me. Cheers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 March, 2010, 04:58:58 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2010, 04:11:22 PM
It seems to me from watching it is that the way to get chosen is to act like a loud-mouthed self-deluded idiot, preferably with a twattish slogan and/or gesture that you can shout repeatedly.

It's a sure thing!  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 March, 2010, 05:44:48 PM
Not sure if this is in the wrong thread .Its too early to tell.

I let a friend of mine park their 4WD outside my house on the piece of land that is collectively owed by the Mews i live in.This space or piece of land since it is owned by the residents is private property so therefore the council have no jurisdiction over it with the issuance of parking fines and charges of illegal parking so any vehicle parked on this space is technically off the road.The 4WD is untaxed and SORN registered.

Of course the councils petty little revenue collectors dont see it this way and ticketed the vehicle and were also going to tow the car away due to the fact thats its untaxed.I found this out this afternoon and it meant a whole lot of running around and phone calls and a visit to the town hall because the useless cunts wont answer their telephone.I was very unhappy to say the least.

I got through to them on a direct number that i was given and i have to call them back in the morning to determine the ownership of the land .The council just assumed that it was their land when its not so this could potentially become a dispute over ownership of land but i will not back down on this.

I also reminded the council that i was quite happy to go to the police and report an attempted theft of private property off private property and trespass and the rest which changed their minds a bit.

Its just unbelievable because others have parked on this land before and its never been a problem but as soon as i do something to help someone else it all backfires and causes a load of hassle that should NEVER have happened in the first place.

In short they have messed with someone that they shouldnt have. >:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 06:09:23 PM
Peter,

Don't get me wrong here, I don't wish you ill - but if they HAVE to go and fuck with someone (and being council morons, they seem to have this compulsion) you are PRECISELY the fucker I want them to screw with.  You'll make them regret it where other people would roll-over, leave it be and pay up for a quiet life.

I'm glad they picked you, because you'll sort them out.  Sorry it has to happen in the first place though.  Well done mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 06:24:19 PM
Cry havoc and unleash the Peter's of War  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 March, 2010, 06:39:19 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 06:09:23 PM
Peter,

Don't get me wrong here, I don't wish you ill - but if they HAVE to go and fuck with someone (and being council morons, they seem to have this compulsion) you are PRECISELY the fucker I want them to screw with.  You'll make them regret it where other people would roll-over, leave it be and pay up for a quiet life.

I'm glad they picked you, because you'll sort them out.  Sorry it has to happen in the first place though.  Well done mate.

I dont feel that i have any choice.Its understandable that it was an oversight but they will have to admit that they are wrong which to be fair they said that they would be perfectly happy to do.I was polite to them as well.

What made it annoying though was there was a notice in the windscreen of the car asking them to enquire here if there was a problem and it was very clearly worded.They saw this notice as they couldnt miss it as they stuck their ticket under the wiper but they chose to blatantly ignore it.

I wont get my time back or get any compensation for the stress this has caused but i wont suffer idiots.I just wont do it.

It would have been fun  :D if someone had arrived to *attempt* to tow the car away as i would have prevented that from happening but the car has been moved elsewhere temporarily.That was to  waste their time and to prevent sods law from having them show up and tow it when my back is turned.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 02 March, 2010, 06:50:04 PM
Well done for standing your ground, Peter. Though would it be fair to suggest that perhaps one of your neighbours brought it to their attention in the first place?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2010, 06:57:23 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 02 March, 2010, 06:39:19 PM
the car has been moved elsewhere temporarily.

I hope it was properly taxed and insured before it was moved onto, or via, a public road! (ducks)

To play devil's advocate, we get a load of problems round my estate with untaxed cars and vans that seem to be permanently parked up on any spare bit of concrete - the owners always claim it's "off road", but unless it's privately owned land, I'm not sure if this holds water. Lots of them are converted hippy-vans that may disappear from time to time in the festival season, but are a permanent fixture over winter. One car was there for so long it was spray painted silver and turned into an art installation!

Add to this people who park up and walk into the centre or to work in nearby offices, and it becomes very hard for people who actually live here and need to park to find any space. I suppose resident parking permits are the only answer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 07:11:52 PM
Maybe.  Although I've always felt that if you own a place, or rent one for that matter, you ought ot be entitled to park your own vehicle outside your own place if there's space.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 March, 2010, 07:32:45 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 02 March, 2010, 06:50:04 PM
Well done for standing your ground, Peter. Though would it be fair to suggest that perhaps one of your neighbours brought it to their attention in the first place?


Its a controlled parking area around here with residents parking and meters and revenue collectors buzzing around all day and night.

Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2010, 06:57:23 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 02 March, 2010, 06:39:19 PM
the car has been moved elsewhere temporarily.

I hope it was properly taxed and insured before it was moved onto, or via, a public road! (ducks)

To play devil's advocate, we get a load of problems round my estate with untaxed cars and vans that seem to be permanently parked up on any spare bit of concrete - the owners always claim it's "off road", but unless it's privately owned land, I'm not sure if this holds water. Lots of them are converted hippy-vans that may disappear from time to time in the festival season, but are a permanent fixture over winter. One car was there for so long it was spray painted silver and turned into an art installation!



The car has been parked not too far from here in somewhere that is off the road and out of the controlled parking zone that is very quiet.There wasnt much else we could do.

I see your point.In this instance this bit of land is never parked on by residents or otherwise and there are our own signs on the wall requesting that residents dont park on it because its private so they never do apart from the odd short stay which isnt a problem.Visitors to here use it and mostly for short stays and only one car has been ticketed in  about 5 years.

The 4WD was only going to be parked outside here for 2 - 3 days until it was insured and then MOTed and taxed.

I have also had problems with another resident in the mews behind over parking but this has been resolved now [we share the space as in they park on it as well even though its not their property] and we have good relations but i am tired of disputes over a poxy bit of land that is the size of a car when really its none of their fucking business especially the council.This plot of land used to be a garden/flowerbed type thing that was removed and tarmaced over by us so it never was part of a footpath or council owned so they can hardly claim that it was.You can clearly see the outline of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2010, 07:50:32 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 07:11:52 PM
Maybe.  Although I've always felt that if you own a place, or rent one for that matter, you ought ot be entitled to park your own vehicle outside your own place if there's space.

But if someone spots a space outside their block, sticks their van on it and doesn't move it for a couple of years, that space is never available for all the other residents of that block!

And don't get me started on those little napoleons who feel they have a god-given right to park immediately outside their own door, and put out cones when they're not there. I'm always tempted to choose that spot even if there are others available. It's not your street, asshole, you don't get to reserve a spot. Even if you're entitled to have a disabled bay painted outside your house, it's not your own personal parking space, it's available for anyone with a disabled badge (though I do have  little more sympathy if that's the case!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 02 March, 2010, 07:55:35 PM
Fair points, Triple D.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 07:55:48 PM
I'm quite enjoying parking up the street and guess what! These last two days I have never seen so few cars parked in the bays down the bottom of our street. It seems that most people did what I did and said 'Fuck off' to the council and didn't pay the £25 to park down the bottom of the street and are now parking up the top of the street where there are NO bays :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2010, 07:58:13 PM
Until the residents up that end get so pissed off with you taking all their parking spaces that THEY get bays as well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 08:04:00 PM
That's what I hope but there is a field opposite all the houses up there, so there is more space to park.
I will laugh if they do make bays up there as we'll see what Hell is unleashed then especially when they try to implement it.
I mean only half a street has bays, who thought of that load of old bollocks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 March, 2010, 08:12:16 PM
By the way I'm parked near my house now as it's after 18:30. I can park after 16:30 as you are allowed 2 hours with no return in 2 hours and the times are from 08:00-18:30  ;)

That's £25 extra to spend in Inverness :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 03 March, 2010, 11:10:21 AM
The driver side window of me car wouldn't open. I need the car for a few things this week so I thought I'll get it seen to next week. So, I park the car this morning and as I lock it, the window goes down and now won't fucken go up!

*sigh*

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 03 March, 2010, 01:06:21 PM
I just snorted tea out my nose.It may have related to the last post....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 03 March, 2010, 02:24:24 PM
Hmmph! Glad you found it amusing, so did Mrs Mikey!

...I'm now at home and can let you know it was bloody windy on the way

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 March, 2010, 03:34:04 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 03 March, 2010, 11:10:21 AM
The driver side window of me car wouldn't open. I need the car for a few things this week so I thought I'll get it seen to next week. So, I park the car this morning and as I lock it, the window goes down and now won't fucken go up!

*sigh*

M.

I had that problem when i slammed a car door as hard as i could on a Volvo 740 in a fit of rage.The glass jumped out of the mechanism inside the door and slid down inside the door.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 03 March, 2010, 03:35:31 PM
Went to the dentist at lunchtime, turns out I've got to have root canal work and a crown on one tooth. The rest of my gnashers are fine but this one recidivist little bastard is going to cost me £200. Thank god I managed to sign on as an NHS patient or it would have been over £600.  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 March, 2010, 03:57:30 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 03 March, 2010, 03:35:31 PM
Went to the dentist at lunchtime, turns out I've got to have root canal work and a crown on one tooth. The rest of my gnashers are fine but this one recidivist little bastard is going to cost me £200. Thank god I managed to sign on as an NHS patient or it would have been over £600.  :o

Root canal surgery isnt as bad as all that.I had a tooth knocked out when i was 14 and had the nerve drilled out to kill it with no anaesthetic and it wasnt nearly as painful as i was expecting.

*

The parking fiasco is all resolved as the council have admitted that they were in the wrong and the revenue collectors have been sent a notice telling them not to ticket in future as its private property.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 March, 2010, 04:07:28 PM
I had a tooth damaged when I was in the army and the dentist said to me 'I can build it up and fart about but it will constantly need to be repaired or I can take it out now!'
Seeing as it was a bottom rear one I thought I don't need that one and I'm buggered if I'm spending money each year on a tooth that will be constantly damaged, so out it went!
My civillian dentist laughed when I told him this story.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 03 March, 2010, 04:49:06 PM
Actually my dentist gave me that choice a couple of years ago. I don't regret having it hoiked out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 03 March, 2010, 04:54:16 PM
Me neither.  The notion of having to hang onto something that will require HUGE and EXPENSIVE maintainence over the rest of your life to that degree felt like a no-brainer. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 March, 2010, 05:06:52 PM
Mine was a front tooth that was knocked out.Its was a very small tooth next to the top left canine tooth.It was knocked out in a fight and i actually saw it fly through the air but i couldnt find it afterwards.I didnt fancy being gap toothed but i have had 4 crowns so far and it still doesnt look right and it is an expensive business.The crown caused severe toothache because i had wisdom teeth coming through at the back which causes the other teeeth to move around except the tooth with the crown wouldnt move which caused severe pain because of the pressure on it from the other teeth around it.

I have heard that having wisdom removed is hell but thankfully mine didnt need removing.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 March, 2010, 06:19:32 PM
I had a root canal & crown about 4 years ago and it's been fine but it was a nightmare to get done, had I known it would take 7 trips to the dentist to get it done I would have just had the tooth yanked out. The worst part was having the temporary filling taken out so they could do the root fill, I asked the dentist why he didn't numb it and he said the nerves were all dead after the last treatment, he promptly shoved something down to clear the temp filling out of one of the root holes, only to have me shoot 3 feet up the couch in agony, calling him a fugging iriot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 March, 2010, 08:38:52 PM
By freaky coincidence I was also at the dentist this lunchtime getting a crown. Almost choked when he put that mold thing in as he used too much of the blue rubbery gunk, which squeezed out the back and nearly made me gag.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 March, 2010, 12:51:37 AM
I have been made aware of Christmas cake but I have not been prima facie with it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 March, 2010, 12:57:18 AM
You poor thing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 06 March, 2010, 02:05:16 AM
Quote from: Kerrin on 03 March, 2010, 03:35:31 PM
Went to the dentist at lunchtime, turns out I've got to have root canal work and a crown on one tooth. The rest of my gnashers are fine but this one recidivist little bastard is going to cost me £200. Thank god I managed to sign on as an NHS patient or it would have been over £600.  :o

I got two two root canal done last year and while both were painful, they were nowhere near as uncomfortable as the the pain I was experiencing before I got them done. So I'd advise you to get it done as soon as you can.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 March, 2010, 02:24:37 AM
I'm currently wearing a temporary crown till next Saturday - it's a smooth metal affair, but I've got an old metal filling beneath it so when I bite down, I get that horrible 'tinfoil on filling' sensation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 06 March, 2010, 08:20:56 AM
it is said that tooth ache,back pain and childbirth are the three most painful things the human body can endure.

I agree with the first two, but i feel the 3rd is open to debate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 March, 2010, 08:19:49 PM
I can't believe it!
Since buying that new tumble dryer last week we haven't used the bloody thing due to the weather and the missus puts a wash on timer every night ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 06 March, 2010, 11:43:36 PM
The last bus is too early.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 March, 2010, 11:55:23 PM
That's what you get for not being a shut-in like me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 07 March, 2010, 08:55:10 AM
On the subject of dentists I had a check up last week and she seemed to have missed that one of my molars has been chipped.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 March, 2010, 11:47:41 PM
So I've got my jet pack and a fair copy of the suit that Bond wears at the start of Thunderball for the James Bond Fancy Dress Disco.

The first prize goes to a bloke dressed as Charlie Chaplin (categorically not Odd Job - wrong shape hat).

Anyway, Mrs Tips (making a rather fetching Xenia Onatopp) is chatting to the Judge of the competition later and he says "Yeah, I was going to giuve it to the bloke with the Jet Pack but then I remembered that he won last year".  (In my Terminator costume).

(The chap that sholud have won had a dinner jacket on under wet suit  - just for the sheer deication and sweatiness he put himself through).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 March, 2010, 06:32:48 PM
I tried a pickled egg and it was one of the worst things I have ever had in my mouth. Worse than when I accidentally got poo in there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 08 March, 2010, 06:35:08 PM
'Accidentally', Roger? Come on, you're among friends, you can be honest...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 March, 2010, 06:42:54 PM
It was intended for your mom's chest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 March, 2010, 09:33:25 PM
Weezy is finally in jail. I'll miss you Lil' Wayne.

Also, mum "didn't know" that she shouldn't put bananas in the fridge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 08 March, 2010, 09:41:45 PM
I spent a reasonable amount of time doing some last minute homework, only to realise I'd done it weeks ago. I swiftly printed it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: satchmo on 08 March, 2010, 09:51:37 PM
Two eight year olds burned down the doctors surgery near where I live, they had to evacuate Asda and everything...

http://www.thenorthernecho.co.uk/news/local/spennymoor/5046502.Father___s_shame_over_surgery_fire/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 March, 2010, 11:50:58 PM
I was pretending that I was being punched in the face by an off-screen assailant on chatroulette by punching myself in the face and now I don't feel very well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 March, 2010, 12:04:13 AM
Oh dear god Roger, please tell me I haven't seen you wanking. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: flip-r mk2 on 09 March, 2010, 12:05:30 AM
Makes a change from having a chug on  chatroulette I suppose.




filip
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 09 March, 2010, 10:58:17 AM
My crap printer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 March, 2010, 11:18:22 AM
When I got out of bed yesterday I managed to get a spelk in the heel of my right foot, fuck it hurt. I then had to wait for my wife to finish work so she could pull it out due to it being impossible for me to do it.
Lets just say she had great fun with all her implements laid out ready to operate on a defenceless old me. It hurt even more as she gouged out the little git and when she put the salt water on Jesus Christ!
Still all is well now, so the Hell-Trek is safe ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 March, 2010, 01:11:27 PM
We've had a delivery of DVDs go missing.

Our client commissioned us to do the whole package. They sent us an ISO, we did the artwork then sub-contracted the manufacture and print to a DVD-pressing plant - all with the client's knowledge.

The plant then sub-contracted delivery to the courier. We have proof from the courier that the goods were signed for at the designated address, but the client says they are not there, and that there is no-one there by the name of the signatory.

Who is responsible for this? Me, the DVD manufacturers, the courier or the client?

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 March, 2010, 01:16:13 PM
Well it can't possibly be your fault, then again this is Britain and anyone can be guilty of anything nowadays.
Hope you get it all sorted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 09 March, 2010, 01:24:27 PM
From the way you explain it, it comes down to the courier. Good luck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 March, 2010, 03:18:00 PM
Cheers, Fellas. I'm just a little worried we're going to get ask to pay for this...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 12 March, 2010, 12:37:38 PM
Shit Banners, that sucks.

Oh and Roger, remember this *ahem*

BA-NA-NAS COME FROM THE TRO-PI-CAL EQU-A-TOR
SO YOU SHOULD NEVER PUT BA-NA-NAS IN THE RE-FRIDG-ER-A-TOR!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 12 March, 2010, 01:49:52 PM
I've sat on my phone.

And for those of you that haven't met me in person, that means the screen is fecked.

And I'm not due an upgrade until end of May. 

So I'm having to use a five year old Nokia the size of a brick until then. (I suppose teh good news is that, unlike modern phones, it goes for about three weeks between charges).

Oh and re: Swan Lake, one of my multitudinous nieces is called Odette. (shortened to DOT which goes well with her brother Dashiel)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 12 March, 2010, 02:10:17 PM
...because the annual loons-chasing-a-cheese-down-a-hill has been canceled! Boo!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/gloucestershire/8563692.stm
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 March, 2010, 02:22:41 PM
My wife threw out half an onion I had been keeping in the fridge for the purpose of manufacturing a yummy sandwich for my lunch (a whole onion is too much for any one sambo).  Apparently it was 'gathering bacteria', despite being sealed in tupperware.  Knowing enough of women to concede the point, I abandoned the project and had a truly scrummy sandwich in a branch of Pig & Heifer (despite being well over budget this month thanks to the Alec omnibus), made for me by a very attractive Polish lady who resembled Enid from Ghost World (the comic).  See wife, you've pushed me further into the red, and (metaphorically) into the arms of another with your health warning!  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 March, 2010, 02:34:05 PM
Bugger, it's hailstones in maidstone at this very moment. At least I can laugh at the people in the street running for cover :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 March, 2010, 05:07:48 PM
Quote from: Banners on 09 March, 2010, 01:11:27 PM
We've had a delivery of DVDs go missing.

Our client commissioned us to do the whole package. They sent us an ISO, we did the artwork then sub-contracted the manufacture and print to a DVD-pressing plant - all with the client's knowledge.

The plant then sub-contracted delivery to the courier. We have proof from the courier that the goods were signed for at the designated address, but the client says they are not there, and that there is no-one there by the name of the signatory.

Who is responsible for this? Me, the DVD manufacturers, the courier or the client?

M@

I would say that the client and/or the courier is to blame but the question is is how did the goods get signed for by the client which the couriers are claiming by a non-existant person ?

Someone signed for them.

The client could be trying something on here but its really the responsibilty of the client to chase that up with the courier because there is no way that you are responsible for the goods while they are in transit.The plant were responsible for approving the courier as well so it was effectively out of your control and your remit.

You cant trust hardly anyone these days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 March, 2010, 07:22:33 PM
I once had a long argument with a firm about them claiming not to have rec'd something - even after obtaining a photocopy of the signature, they wouldn't budge - they admitted they had a security guard by that name but still said it wasn't delivered because "he doesn't work that day". Must be a feckin coincidence then!  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 12 March, 2010, 08:26:59 PM
My voice box changey thing arrived today but with no ac adaptor despite the fact it's supposed to be with it. I have a nice bit of metal that doesn't do anything and will now have to e-mail/phone and generally be pissed about until i can "prove" it's not my fault and am not some crook trying to get a free adaptor off them. It's just so irritating and the second time this has happned when buying a electronic jolly item for my geetars.  :(

God hates my guitar playing. (can't blame him really)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 13 March, 2010, 05:21:26 PM
I overheard a conversation between two young ladies at one of the customers I frequently visit, they were rating the sexyness of the engineers (of which I am one) from the company I work for. I butted in to ask how I rated and they told me I was definitely just inside the top ten.

There are only eight of us  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 13 March, 2010, 05:24:05 PM
That means there's a fictional person who's sexier?  OUCH.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 March, 2010, 07:57:20 PM
Managed to drop my phone whilst drunk last night (I blame the swine who made me drink those tequilas), lost the battery cover and cracked the screen. Bollocks! Realised (after speaking to 3 different people at Vodafone today) that I'd cancelled my phone insurance a year ago to save some money. Double bollocks! That said, I've managed to find replacement parts on ebaY for under £15 and a video on youtube showing how to replace the screen. Thank Grud for the internet.

And it's the couriers problem Banners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 March, 2010, 10:25:15 PM
Got an unsightly rash next to my armpit. Reckon it's the 'betes or the 'gitis. I dunno, I'm not a doctor. Whatever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 15 March, 2010, 07:33:40 AM
Sure it's not a reaction to your new BO-basher Roger? Maybe you need to return to the loving arms of Lynx Africa.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 March, 2010, 07:57:34 AM
QuoteReckon it's the 'betes or the 'gitis.

All I know from my extensive knowledge of medical dramas is that it's never lupus.

And yeah, it's the couriers' fault, reason being they're the only people in the chain who can't demonstrate that they did what they were paid to do:  i.e. confirmed delivery to the right address.  Having been in this boat myself, I appreciate that this will not help you get paid.  Clients are funny about paying for things they didn't receive, and couriers are funny about paying at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 March, 2010, 12:01:06 PM
Bollocks.
There I was waiting for 12:00 just in case the postie has some Dredd winnings for me and then I can rush down the town to see if that Comic Heroes is in, with the magnets. I thought why not print off the maps and directions for the Hell-Trek pick-ups so off I go. Black in is getting low so I change it, only when I break the seal the ink decides to squirt out over my bloody fingers ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 16 March, 2010, 10:43:29 PM
Over the last month or so my ten year old aol e-mail account has suddenly started to attract an inordinate amount of spam. Then, tonight, I got home from work to find some manky little junkie cunt hanging around my top-floor landing, rattling my letterbox. When challenged he made some pathetic attempt to make out he'd gone to the wrong door. I later noticed that my name had been removed from the door.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 17 March, 2010, 12:46:57 AM
Cosh,

I spy id theft!

As for my impediment: If it's any consolation, I've just finished working after starting at 8 this morning. A whopping 16 hours, 45 minutes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 March, 2010, 12:54:15 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 16 March, 2010, 10:43:29 PM
I later noticed that my name had been removed from the door.

Get you, we only have a number :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 March, 2010, 01:04:32 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 16 March, 2010, 10:43:29 PM
Over the last month or so my ten year old aol e-mail account has suddenly started to attract an inordinate amount of spam. Then, tonight, I got home from work to find some manky little junkie cunt hanging around my top-floor landing, rattling my letterbox. When challenged he made some pathetic attempt to make out he'd gone to the wrong door. I later noticed that my name had been removed from the door.

You should have called pest and vermin control.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 March, 2010, 10:16:38 AM
Damn, I just started my Lasagne for this evening, getting the mince done now. Chopped the onion up, oil in pan, put onion in, added pepper, Italian seasoning, red wine, Worcester sauce and then realised I was meant to pop down to the butchers to get some mince  ::)

Guess where I am off now  :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 17 March, 2010, 11:45:32 AM
HUNGRY!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 March, 2010, 01:28:09 PM
What SG said.  Sooooooo hungry. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 March, 2010, 01:31:42 PM
Eat something.

Problem solved.

I bought a bag of apples from the Co-op.They are french Granny Smiths [non-organic] and took a couple of bites out one and it leaves a vile bitter chemically aftertaste.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 17 March, 2010, 01:34:18 PM
Rub them on something.

Problem solved.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 17 March, 2010, 01:58:11 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 March, 2010, 01:31:42 PM
...took a couple of bites out one and it leaves a vile bitter chemically aftertaste.

That sounds like a completely natural cooking apple type taste to me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 19 March, 2010, 09:32:05 AM
At a cash machine last night, I asked for £20 and it only gave me £10. First time anything like that has ever happened to me.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 19 March, 2010, 10:04:45 PM
Quote from: Banners on 19 March, 2010, 09:32:05 AM
At a cash machine last night, I asked for £20 and it only gave me £10. First time anything like that has ever happened to me.

M@

When did voice recognition cash machines come in to use?







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 March, 2010, 04:21:55 PM
Just lately the radio has been playing these 'Anti Terror' adverts and it's getting beyond a joke. I heard it on TalkSport first but since then I've heard variants on Absolute and a few others. This means if you hate a neighbour you can ring up and say he's bought a lot of fertilizer lately and see about a 100 police smash his house to pieces looking for it. Remember it is confidential ;)
Have a listen to this one:-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIAFHjL3ZMg&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIAFHjL3ZMg&feature=related)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 20 March, 2010, 04:37:08 PM
Yeah, that's disturbing, and certainly likely to add up to a lot of wasted police time. Mere suspicion doesn't constitute evidence. Why does paying for things with cash and keeping your curtains shut constitute any more compelling a reason for suspecting someone is a terrorist than 'looks a bit foreign'?
:|

Too bad it's just one link from that video to 'David Icke-The Evidence of Reptilian Shapeshifters Among Us-1/6'
:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 20 March, 2010, 04:37:19 PM
I might do that with my neighbours. Pissants. White little weasels with nothing better to than play with coppers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 March, 2010, 04:53:41 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 March, 2010, 04:21:55 PM
Just lately the radio has been playing these 'Anti Terror' adverts and it's getting beyond a joke. I heard it on TalkSport first but since then I've heard variants on Absolute and a few others. This means if you hate a neighbour you can ring up and say he's bought a lot of fertilizer lately and see about a 100 police smash his house to pieces looking for it. Remember it is confidential ;)
Have a listen to this one:-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIAFHjL3ZMg&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIAFHjL3ZMg&feature=related)

I feel that i have a duty to report the govt as being terrorist suspects since they fit the criteria.I say its my duty as the ad uses the collective "we" as in "we all have a role to play ete etc.There is after all a lot of suspicious activity within various govt departments and Mi5/6.This ad falls under the definition of terrorism which is to generate a climate of fear for political purposes.

Really though its indicative of how this country has degenerated that our non representative govt initiates Snitch programmes just like the Soviet Union and East Germany [2 historical examples] but the exact same thing is going on right now in the US and its really very sad.

Its all mind games/psy-ops as well as these ads are repeated throughout the day ad nauseum and its like a mantra and they are using the logic that if they repeat it often enough people will absorb it more readily.

Talksport is junk and IIRC it is runned by Kelvin McKenzie -ex editor of The Sun.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 20 March, 2010, 07:13:27 PM
Why is it only listeners of commercial radio are being exposed to this? They can't make up a very large percentage of the population. Are they more susceptible to right wing propaganda? I know that listeners of Radio 4 are immune. Are Radio 1 listeners being spared as well?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 20 March, 2010, 08:52:18 PM
Radio 1 listeners shouldn't be spared ANYTHING.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 March, 2010, 01:26:16 AM
I am sick and tired of loud and boorish thickshit people who have no consideration for others because of their tiresome self-self-self attitude and their fucking shouting.

I went out earlier this evening for a meal with my mum and dad who i havent seen for ages so we wanted to eat and have a chat but we couldnt because of a table of four sitting behind us and the fucking decibel levels of the two stupid laughing and shreiking women was so loud that it totally ruined the meal because we ate it quickly so we could move elsewhere to get away from them. >:(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 22 March, 2010, 04:46:11 PM
Vile behaviour.  Have a laugh by all means but maybe a restaurant isn't the place for a raucous shriekfest?  Tut tut tut.  Don't know how you avoided having a word with them, I know I bloody would have.

Of course, in my situation nobody else would be able to see or hear my folks.  Might ask them to give the shrieking harpies a scare or two. *grin*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 March, 2010, 07:07:19 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 22 March, 2010, 04:46:11 PM
Don't know how you avoided having a word with them, I know I bloody would have.



I came so close but i was asked not to.

Killjoys.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 22 March, 2010, 07:38:56 PM
Yeah, my parents would have done the same.  Then they'd have argued about which one of THEM got to go and have a word.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 March, 2010, 10:03:13 PM
There was a pebble in my shoe.

I went to a bench to take off my shoe to remove the pebble.

The bench was wet. I do not care for wet socks

I had to balance on one leg. A woman walking her dog saw me trying to balance on leg with my shoe off.

I got some payback when I timed my shoe tying with her walking past so that my fat arse was sticking out as she walked past
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 March, 2010, 01:30:10 AM
Every SINGLE time i type a reasoned argument on the Prison Planet comments sections for socialised healthcare using the UK as an example and how in the UK you have the choice to use private healthcare providers and how it generally works quite well for everyone and is affordable to the taxpayer i post the comment and then it is immediately censored by whoever it is that moderates the comments.

Socialised healthcare is an anathema to the US and although i  can say i think that the way that the US govt has gone about it is just WRONG on so many levels and how its just a bailout for the US insurance industry as a whole and how champagne corks were popping when the bill was passed and how the insurance industries/pharmaceuticals profits are expected to triple in the next 4 years and i can point out everything that is wrong with it but i cant make reasoned arguments for socialised healthcare because i am censored.

I keep refreshing the page to see if the comment uploads but it wont and for a website whos founder is an advocate for free speech and is anti-censorship then there is a problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 23 March, 2010, 10:38:42 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 March, 2010, 10:03:13 PM
There was a pebble in my shoe.

I went to a bench to take off my shoe to remove the pebble.

The bench was wet. I do not care for wet socks

I had to balance on one leg. A woman walking her dog saw me trying to balance on leg with my shoe off.

I got some payback when I timed my shoe tying with her walking past so that my fat arse was sticking out as she walked past

I always pictured you as a skinny runt type.

Thanks for ruining that as well.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 23 March, 2010, 11:07:03 AM
That's pathetic, PW.  What vermin.  Free speech is free speech. 

Americans take fear of socialism to ridiculous new heights sometimes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 March, 2010, 08:07:57 PM
There seems to a trend towards car drivers just turning out into the road without indicating and without giving way to oncoming traffic as if its a game that they are playing or because they are too impatient to wait just a few seconds or heaven forbid a minute or two.This happened 7 times today and i find it annoying and unnecessary.

Stop doing it you stupid inconsiderate Fucks.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 March, 2010, 08:18:17 PM
I hate it when you are waiting at a junction to turn left in busy traffic and some bastard blocks it up with no where to go, a little courtesy goes a long way and when the traffic does start moving again the cunt behind him carries on without giving a second thought.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 March, 2010, 08:24:27 PM
I was just deleting some stuff off my camcorder ready for Hi-Ex! and some how I've gone and fucking wiped the whole bloody thing clean.
Thank fuck I've got the Judge Minty stuff on the laptop and PC.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 23 March, 2010, 09:44:16 PM
There's that really cool retribution to people not indicating in Shoot .em up.
" Just two inches away! My indicater switch is a mere two inches from the steering wheel!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 23 March, 2010, 09:59:27 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 March, 2010, 08:24:27 PM
I was just deleting some stuff off my camcorder ready for Hi-Ex! and some how I've gone and fucking wiped the whole bloody thing clean.
Thank fuck I've got the Judge Minty stuff on the laptop and PC.

I was just reading about Minty in the new Comic mag.

That's your project?  Sounds like a great flick.  Is it going to be out out for public viewing?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 23 March, 2010, 10:13:38 PM
Quote from: Something FishyThat's your project?

Heh, I think it's going to be slightly better than something knocked up on a camcorder(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 March, 2010, 10:56:14 PM
What a lot of minor impediments! How depressing.

Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 March, 2010, 01:30:10 AM
I cant make reasoned arguments for socialised healthcare because i am censored.

That's shocking. Outrageous. Either they want a grown-up debate or they want to promote a particular political bias. I suspect it's the latter. But on a forum named 'Prison Planet' I wouldn't be expecting anything else: it sounds like it has an agenda.

Quote from: vzzbux on 23 March, 2010, 08:18:17 PM
I hate it when you are waiting at a junction to turn left in busy traffic and some bastard blocks it up with no where to go, a little courtesy goes a long way and when the traffic does start moving again the cunt behind him carries on without giving a second thought.

I so really hate that!  >:(

I never cross the end of a side road unless I can get all the way past it, and those people who drive off from a standstill instead of letting side-road traffic merge piss me off so much! I recently returned home during rush-hour, wanting to turn into a residential side street off a major road. A car pulled out and turned right, across my path. It was their right of way. I waited and indicated to turn right, into the same road, using the same gap, but as I turned my steering wheel the woman who had let that car out proceeded to inch forward and block the turning. So we sat there, with my front wheels turned towards her car, with me glaring at her until the traffic started moving again. It was clear she couldn't see she was doing anything wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 March, 2010, 11:03:31 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 23 March, 2010, 08:18:17 PM
I hate it when you are waiting at a junction to turn left in busy traffic and some bastard blocks it up with no where to go, a little courtesy goes a long way and when the traffic does start moving again the cunt behind him carries on without giving a second thought.


I meant turn right. But either way grieves me the same.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 March, 2010, 01:19:44 AM
Quote from: Banners on 23 March, 2010, 10:13:38 PM
Quote from: Something FishyThat's your project?

Heh, I think it's going to be slightly better than something knocked up on a camcorder(!)

The Damn Cheek of it, I'll have you know my behind the scenes stuff is a masterpiece  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 24 March, 2010, 09:39:27 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES
Quote from: Banners
Quote from: Something FishyThat's your project?
Heh, I think it's going to be slightly better than something knocked up on a camcorder(!)
The Damn Cheek of it, I'll have you know my behind the scenes stuff is a masterpiece  ;)

To be fair, if you've put the same amount of effort into your video as you have with the Hell-Trek, it should be an Oscar winner next year for sure(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 24 March, 2010, 12:52:09 PM
CF wins the oscar for the best DVD extras?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 March, 2010, 01:21:41 PM
I dont like having to chase up someone so that i can be paid the money that i am owed.

I think its very inconsiderate and i think its ill mannered when it is their priority to pay me.

I will have to chase them up this evening and if they are in when i call they will have to stop whatever they are doing and go to the cash machine.

>:(


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 24 March, 2010, 01:24:34 PM
How annoying.

I've now gone to Ferret hand jobs and was surprised.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 24 March, 2010, 10:48:49 PM
Quote from: Banners on 23 March, 2010, 10:13:38 PM
Quote from: Something FishyThat's your project?

Heh, I think it's going to be slightly better than something knocked up on a camcorder(!)

M@

doh.. i didn't mean it like that.  I'm just wondering if he's one of the key people behind it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 March, 2010, 11:09:13 PM
Mmm. Those pesky rail strikes seem to be slap bang in the middle of our big family outing down to that London for Mrs Tips birthday.  And we decided to go by train rather than air.

Annoying but I'm generally supportive of the concept behind the strike; sick and tired of short term job cutting to save money for shareholders and fat cats at expense of everybody else's safety.  Admit I'll have to read a bit more to get a properly informed opinion.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 March, 2010, 09:48:34 AM
Irish passport office industrial action is stressing me out.  Having mucked about for months with Tesco Club Card points and internet vouchers and borrowed roofracks I have managed to concoct an essentially free (bar the petrol) roadtrip to somewhere warm enough to camp with a 9-month old in May before the wife goes back to work after her maternity leave (whereupon she won't see daylight 'til next year, by all accounts, and the kids will be dumped in a creche 50 hours a week), despite us being currently without a bean.  And now it's freaking me out that I won't be able to get a passport for the aforementioned infant in time.  Grrrrr, bloody government.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 30 March, 2010, 12:37:55 PM
Night Freight delivery driver refused to unload 15,000 brochures we designed and printed. The only person at the client's premises was a receptionist who couldn't leave the front desk. So, rather than risk the driver leaving with the brochures, I dashed round there - breaking several red lights and speed limits - and unloaded them myself. Gah!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 30 March, 2010, 03:34:52 PM
Clients.

Can't shoot them.

Can't strangle them.

Too many laws protecting the stupid,  that's what I reckon.

I'm going to have a lie down.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 March, 2010, 03:39:35 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 30 March, 2010, 03:34:52 PM
Clients.

Can't shoot them.

Can't strangle them.


You and your anti-bloodsport ways.  How else are we supposed to keep their numbers under control?  They'll just die slowly from starvation because they can't find their own mouths if we don't step in and do the decent thing.  It's the most humane thing to do, and it keeps local businesses happy.  I'd offer my services as a consultant, but I'm heading up this clock tower with a high-powered rifle at the moment, and I may be indisposed for a few years after that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 30 March, 2010, 04:58:59 PM
That was pretty much what I needed to read! Cheers  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 30 March, 2010, 05:42:30 PM
To be fair, on this occasion my chagrin is aimed at the unhelpful courier and not at all at the client .

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 31 March, 2010, 05:20:15 PM
Yeah, it's the driver's fault, not the client's.  Unholy cock-end.  Hope you complained to his boss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 01 April, 2010, 09:24:08 AM
I've just been reviewing the finances with 'er indoors to try and work out why we have pretty much run out of money two weeks before payday. Could it be the £500+ we spent taxing, insuring and repairing the brakes on her car? Maybe it's the £250 we spent fixing up and decorating the kitchen and dining room.
Nope, it's none of those, apparently it's the £20 I spent on Blurays that's dropped us in the shit  ::).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 01 April, 2010, 12:48:06 PM
Blimey, greenhouses are expensive.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 01 April, 2010, 05:25:08 PM
I've bought coriander instead of parsley - oh spoons
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 01 April, 2010, 05:30:52 PM
Quote from: wild-seven on 01 April, 2010, 05:25:08 PM
I've bought coriander instead of parsley - oh spoons
*TWHACK* 

That'll learn ye!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 01 April, 2010, 05:35:35 PM
Indeed that'll learn me for being a middle class ponce (who can't tell the difference between the two)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 01 April, 2010, 05:45:32 PM
Hand in your middle class card at reception and clear out your desk.  You are clearly NOT what you seem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Lady Festina on 01 April, 2010, 05:58:32 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 30 March, 2010, 03:39:35 PM
I'd offer my services as a consultant, but I'm heading up this clock tower with a high-powered rifle at the moment, and I may be indisposed for a few years after that.

If there's any chance that clocktower is in Gloucestershire, I have a client that could do with cross-hairs on their forehead....

(That said, and for another thread, I now have five days off. Count 'em!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 April, 2010, 10:58:16 PM
My stupid Sky HD box had a brainfart and didn't record Dr Who :(. After looking forward to it all week, I now have to wait until Monday night to see it.

It also didn't record that Wizard of oz shite thing for the wife, so it's not all bad :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 April, 2010, 11:13:57 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 03 April, 2010, 10:58:16 PM
My stupid Sky HD box had a brainfart and didn't record Dr Who :(. After looking forward to it all week, I now have to wait until Monday night to see it.
iPlayer?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 03 April, 2010, 11:16:48 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 03 April, 2010, 10:58:16 PM
My stupid Sky HD box had a brainfart and didn't record Dr Who :(. After looking forward to it all week, I now have to wait until Monday night to see it.

Thought it was on BBC3 tomorrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 April, 2010, 11:23:46 PM
Unfortuantely Iplayer sucks on my crappy broadband :(.

Thanks Worldshown, I didn't notice it on BBC 3 tommorrow, I might slum it and watch it in SD on there instead ;).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 April, 2010, 11:28:15 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 03 April, 2010, 11:23:46 PM
Unfortuantely Iplayer sucks on my crappy broadband :(.
You can download as well as stream.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 03 April, 2010, 11:47:09 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 03 April, 2010, 10:58:16 PM
My stupid Sky HD box had a brainfart and didn't record Dr Who :(. After looking forward to it all week, I now have to wait until Monday night to see it.

It also didn't record that Wizard of oz shite thing for the wife, so it's not all bad :)

Go for a V+ box from Virgin quite a bit more reliable than Sky and you don't get the corruption when there is a slight breeze or a few droplets of rain. If you can't get it in your area then your boned sorry.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 April, 2010, 12:02:11 AM
I've been here on the bog for about 20 mins whilst the lady is (was) in the mood in the bedroom. Damn that dodgy curry!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 04 April, 2010, 12:10:02 AM
Ah, romance. That could just as easily have come from the pen of Byron or Keats Matt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 April, 2010, 10:41:51 AM
Heh... We'd actually just got back from seeing Romeo and Juliet at the RSC, so my poetic failings are even more stark(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 April, 2010, 01:35:08 PM
Someone i know owes me 200 quid and its becoming a problem not to mention that its the same individual who i let park their 4WD outside my house which resulted in a load of hassle and wasted time for myself and he hasnt reciprocated for that in any way whatsoever either.

This is starting to annoy me a bit now when i think about it as i dont like being used and abused or ignored so this individual is going to be on the receiving end of my wrath and thats not a good place to be.

>:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 April, 2010, 01:42:46 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 August, 2009, 01:14:26 PM
I wish i was owed some money.

It just goes to show, if you wish hard enough your wishes will one day come true!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 05 April, 2010, 02:25:38 AM
I've just noticed the email address on my profile is wrong.

This means if anyone from here has attempted contacting me via that address, you've actually been sending an email to a completely different Malcolm Kirk who probably doesn't even read 2000ad.

Just off to change it now...

Edit : There. That's better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 05 April, 2010, 04:34:51 AM
What pisses me off as of late, is when people join the forum just to sell their collection. Okay I know they might get a buyer but it does get on my tits when Mr, or Mrs one post joins trying to flog their progs  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 05 April, 2010, 09:03:02 AM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 05 April, 2010, 02:25:38 AM
I've just noticed the email address on my profile is wrong.

This means if anyone from here has attempted contacting me via that address, you've actually been sending an email to a completely different Malcolm Kirk who probably doesn't even read 2000ad.

Just off to change it now...

Edit : There. That's better.

You  could have given us a day to send random messages to this false Malcolm Kirk.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 April, 2010, 12:10:29 PM
Back in September I started up five new GCSE courses, which I had to quit by Christmas to get another job because I was earning less as an FE teacher than I could earn as a road sweeper. My conscience was reasonably clear on leaving, because those courses were my idea and they wouldn't have run at all if I hadn't set them up.

The bad part comes when I learn that none of the four tutors they found to replace me are particularly good. Their sociology tutor teaches them stuff that's not on the syllabus as well as stuff I already covered last autumn. Their psychology tutor gives them unethical experiments to do involving the general public. Their English language tutor doesn't like literature, and their literature tutor can't mark essays because he's been used to a different exam board's marking scheme for the past 20 years and can't cope with using a new one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 April, 2010, 02:38:32 PM
A few weeks ago a I ordered the second Requiem collection (the Heavy Metal one that goes all the way up to 6, not the Titan one that only goes to 4) from Amazon.com and I've just discovered that it's a slightly different size to first one! Thankfully, the spines have the same design.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 06 April, 2010, 06:52:19 AM
I was online now its refusing me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 April, 2010, 07:25:29 PM
I have had a cold all the way through Easter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 April, 2010, 07:39:44 PM
There was a QUEUE in the CHIP SHOP. On a TUESDAY.

I forgot to bring a book. It was Brighton Rock. The Catholic Church strikes again...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 April, 2010, 11:13:15 PM
I called into the WestCornwallPasty today for a cheese and onion pasty and they were very nearly half the size that they used to be.I hate it when businesses do this with food because its insulting because they think that i wont mind or wont notice the difference in size but i do so they have lost a loyal customer.

>:(

They used to be one of the few things i could eat as a snack that was actually filling but there is another pasty shop so i will now go there instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 April, 2010, 11:53:36 PM
Cut my thumb.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 07 April, 2010, 01:29:54 PM
My cat (Jonesey) has been undertaking a campaign of guerilla warfare on a sort of stray that has incurred on Jonesey's turf. This interloper is bigger and much more pissed off with the world it would seem and has, over the last three or so months, knocked the fluff out of my cat on a few occasions.

Long story short (involves the vet, nearly losing an eye and another abcess), Jonesey hasn't been out in nearly two weeks. I don't know if it's wise to let him out any more. He's going fuckin mental. He's driving me mental.

And don't forget the brown sharks in the litter tray. ::)

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 April, 2010, 04:22:10 PM
I need to knuckle down and seriously get some writing done, but I'm fucking lazy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 April, 2010, 05:03:27 PM
I've just watched £795 fly out my wallet when I collected my car from the garage.
Sweet Joy  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 April, 2010, 12:13:22 AM
Sat in traffic jam on the A406 west bound just before the underpass of the A1010.
Why?
Because a bloke is thinking about ending it all.
Looks like an even easier night than normal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 April, 2010, 12:19:46 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 April, 2010, 12:13:22 AM
Sat in traffic jam on the A406 west bound just before the underpass of the A1010.
Why?
Because a bloke is thinking about ending it all.
Looks like an even easier night than normal.

Someone else will end it for him if he doesnt get out of the way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 09 April, 2010, 10:08:20 AM
I just upgraded to the newest version of Firefox and, when you open a link in a new tab, it opens immediately to the right of the source tab rather than at the far right. Urrgh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 April, 2010, 10:14:11 AM
Quote from: The CoshI just upgraded to the newest version of Firefox and, when you open a link in a new tab, it opens immediately to the right of the source tab rather than at the far right. Urrgh!

Here's a fix (http://www.pcworld.com/article/191886/make_firefox_36_open_new_tabs_the_same_way_firefox_35_did.html) apparently.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 09 April, 2010, 09:52:21 PM
Forgot to watch Ashes to Ashes. Balls.
Ah well - iPlayer, here I come...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 April, 2010, 10:09:32 PM
Pulled off too much toenail.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 April, 2010, 10:13:17 PM
Quote from: Banners on 09 April, 2010, 10:14:11 AM
Quote from: The CoshI just upgraded to the newest version of Firefox and, when you open a link in a new tab, it opens immediately to the right of the source tab rather than at the far right. Urrgh!
Here's a fix (http://www.pcworld.com/article/191886/make_firefox_36_open_new_tabs_the_same_way_firefox_35_did.html) apparently.
Thank you very much Mr Banners.

Can you help with this one? It's looking increasingly likely that I am going to spend an obscene amount of money finally buying the last few issues of Akira.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 16 April, 2010, 05:37:24 PM
My mate couldnae play on xbox live last night cos his cow was giving birth!


Too  many jokes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 16 April, 2010, 05:47:45 PM
A cock-up between the insurers and the solicitors is preventing my mother's will from being sorted out. Grrr!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 April, 2010, 05:51:29 PM
I arrived at the framing shop at 16:34 only for it to be closed. The official time for closing was 17:00, words may be spoken tomorrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 April, 2010, 06:09:38 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 16 April, 2010, 05:47:45 PM
A cock-up between the insurers and the solicitors is preventing my mother's will from being sorted out. Grrr!

Tricky one. My grandmother's estate is still not settled after two-and-a-half years because a) when she died she owned half a rental property shared with a business partner who still owns half, b) she left no specific instructions for the disposal of her property other than that her two daughters should receive half each, and c) she made her solicitor executor in the hope it would save her daughters hassle. Instead it caused them a lot more hassle because neither one was in charge and there was plenty to argue over.

If my grandmother had left instrucions for her property (including the house she lived in) to be sold and the proceeds divided up, it would have saved a lot of discussion about one or other daughter getting the house in toto and compensating the other, and would have saved the tens of thousands of pounds in property value it lost while off the market for over a year as the property slump deepened. However, you can't weigh the cost for my mum and her sister coming to terms with their feelings if they had sold quickly while wracked with uncertainty about what to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 April, 2010, 08:17:47 PM
Because the 'life is drokking fantastic' thread seems to have vanished.
The stats board doesn't show it, neither does the latest posts page,  or my previous posts list and I want to show that Jock Mean Machine to the world  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 17 April, 2010, 08:23:16 PM
Shit, he's right.  Could it be some glitch that no-ones ever noticed because no thread has ever had so much activity. Maybe you hit 2000 replies and blow a fuse somewhere?

If so, the life spugs thread isn't long for this life either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 April, 2010, 09:01:01 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 April, 2010, 08:17:47 PM
Because the 'life is drokking fantastic' thread seems to have vanished.
The stats board doesn't show it, neither does the latest posts page,  or my previous posts list and I want to show that Jock Mean Machine to the world  >:D

We had better have it back then.

It shouldnt be lost forever or we will have to start another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 18 April, 2010, 11:48:04 PM
I was sitting with my 4 year old daughter going through the alphabet with her this morning and when we got to C I asked her if she knew any words beginning with it.
She said THE C word  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 18 April, 2010, 11:54:49 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 18 April, 2010, 11:48:04 PM
I was sitting with my 4 year old daughter going through the alphabet with her this morning and when we got to C I asked her if she knew any words beginning with it.
She said THE C word  :o

My work here is done.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 20 April, 2010, 07:23:21 PM
Minorly impedimental is the fact that you can't get "I Went Down" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Went_Down) on DVD. Why not? Why the hell not? It's an absolute catastrophe, well it's not, but it's pretty annoying.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 April, 2010, 07:33:50 PM
Unfortunately, your mom's lawyers aren't letting me put it out. Sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 20 April, 2010, 07:40:26 PM
She's got lawyers?! Shit!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 April, 2010, 08:36:06 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 20 April, 2010, 07:23:21 PM
Minorly impedimental is the fact that you can't get "I Went Down" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Went_Down) on DVD. Why not? Why the hell not? It's an absolute catastrophe, well it's not, but it's pretty annoying.
I'm not talking to you. Because ye're a cunt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 20 April, 2010, 09:18:12 PM
Ah well, your loss. Have you got "I Went Down" on DVD by any chance?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 April, 2010, 09:42:44 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 20 April, 2010, 09:18:12 PM
Ah well, your loss. Have you got "I Went Down" on DVD by any chance?
No, but I did see it at the pictures if it helps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 20 April, 2010, 10:04:19 PM
Not really. A mate mentioned it in the pub the other night and I could just about remember a bit of it (where they're resetting their faces after getting pasted some yokels) and wanted to get a copy. £26 for a VHS mind you! I don't fucking think so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 April, 2010, 11:03:48 PM
It's hard trying to find hard core on the internet.


(The building material required for laying the base of the Greenhouse)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 21 April, 2010, 07:39:25 AM
I've managed to find a plethora of downloads of "I Went Down" on the internet and I'll now proceed with the exhaustive task of finding the one that's an Irish gangster film. Just going to dig out my "athletic" wrist support...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: the shutdown man on 21 April, 2010, 12:36:46 PM
Damn, all this talk has made me want to see it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 April, 2010, 12:45:01 PM
I Went Down sounds like a title of a
Quote from: Kerrin on 21 April, 2010, 07:39:25 AM
I've managed to find a plethora of downloads of "I Went Down" on the internet and I'll now proceed with the exhaustive task of finding the one that's an Irish gangster film. Just going to dig out my "athletic" wrist support...
pornographic film.

That must be what this comment is alluding to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 April, 2010, 01:03:10 PM
5 Poles just tried to walk out of the local charity shop with whole rails of secondhand clothes.They were asked to stop and eventually complied.

Unfortunately i wasnt in the shop at the time but i spotted them along the road on my way home as you couldnt miss them so i pointed the police who were looking for them in the right direction.

They looked like they had just left the Cursed Earth and arrived here or one of those films were someone takes a wrong turn out in the sticks somewhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 21 April, 2010, 04:56:11 PM
What? They were muties?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 April, 2010, 05:17:53 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 21 April, 2010, 04:56:11 PM
What? They were muties?

They did have a certain kind of look about them and they looked like they needed to wash their clothes and have a bath.I think they were Poles but a lot of those eastern european languages all sound very similar.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 21 April, 2010, 10:17:29 PM
I had my hair cut earlier and now I appear to be suffering from an allergic reaction to something used on me - fingers crossed that 2 piriton tablets and some aloe vera gel will stop the itching...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 21 April, 2010, 11:09:51 PM
'I Went Down' unfortunate name, but from what I remember it was a decent film, couldnt imagine it travelling well outside this little island though.

David
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 April, 2010, 02:06:06 AM
Where does my brother keep finding Christmas Cake?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 April, 2010, 08:57:37 AM
... Radio 4 doesn't appear to be working through iPlayer this morning and I feel strangely lost without it!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 22 April, 2010, 09:05:16 AM
Surely you have an actual radio sitting around somewhere?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 22 April, 2010, 01:46:27 PM
My cat.

This morning it had thrown most of it's litter onto the floor, seemingly so I could better see what a big shite it had done overnight. So I clean up the mess, and lift the tray only to find my cat managed to piss under it. So I cleaned that up too.

Then when I go back into the living room it had boked all over the sofa.

sigh

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 April, 2010, 09:03:48 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 22 April, 2010, 01:46:27 PM
My cat.

This morning it had thrown most of it's litter onto the floor, seemingly so I could better see what a big shite it had done overnight. So I clean up the mess, and lift the tray only to find my cat managed to piss under it. So I cleaned that up too.

Then when I go back into the living room it had boked all over the sofa.

sigh

M.

What are you feeding the poor beast?  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 22 April, 2010, 09:15:31 PM
Proves my theory about cats are pure evil.






VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 April, 2010, 09:17:27 PM
Quote from: Christov on 22 April, 2010, 09:05:16 AM
Surely you have an actual radio sitting around somewhere?

How old do you think I am?

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 April, 2010, 11:22:23 PM
I need to wash my feet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 April, 2010, 11:53:00 PM
Even I know when something is too rude to post.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 April, 2010, 11:58:03 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 22 April, 2010, 01:46:27 PM
and lift the tray only to find my cat managed to piss under it.

How the fuck do they do that?

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 April, 2010, 01:28:40 AM
WTF is up with the in-store radio in Superdrug?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 23 April, 2010, 12:25:05 PM
QuoteWhat are you feeding the poor beast?

The cat puke appeared to be hair ball induced - one of the problems is other fuckers feeding the cats, leading to fights, hence Jonesey being under house arrest unless we're at home. The hair on his head is growing back, but for a while he was a skin.

Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 April, 2010, 11:58:03 PM

How the fuck do they do that?

Piss under the tray was a new one to me. I didn't realise it was a common skill amongst cat kind.

Today's minor impediment is the lack of Scotts Porage Oats in the local Tesco, so I'm reduced to Quaker after an ill advised box of Tesco own brand. I swear they stop selling things once I buy them; see my favourite oaty, chewy bars and (middle class alert!) tapenade.

M.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 April, 2010, 05:00:19 PM
My local art shop doesnt have any Ivory Board in stock so it means going up to London to buy it instead and luckily an art materials shop in Soho has plenty in stock so it just means a day out in London but the shop is doing a good deal on it so its not all bad.

I just get tired of going into shops and not getting what i want when i want it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 April, 2010, 05:18:44 PM
Just got short notice for working tomorrow morning from 7, and I'm not getting paid for it (everything going to pay off company debts, no money for Tordels for months now), and off down the Social Welfare office for the first time ever next week to see what I can grub up.  Bah.

However, this is all minor stuff. The sun is shining, the family is well, and I've lost 2.5 stone since February on the sweet-jeebus-I'm-broke diet  (the book's out any day now). 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 April, 2010, 11:15:23 PM
Installing cable in someones house today, his order included an N-Router but because of the VOLCANO, Virgin haven't got any country wide, so we provided the customer with a standard G-Router. The bastard only starts kicking off at us not believing a word of it and wanted us to hang around while he tried to get hold of customer services to confirm what we have told him, Prick. Like we didn't have any more jobs to do and your our only customer, Arse Hole.
Why would we make up something like that just to give him a G-Router. We as installers get the brunt of everything that is beyond our control. Why can't customers think before mouthing off.
To cap it all his PC was in the same room as the modem and the house was a modern 3 bed with paper thin walls. He may even browse this website as around his computer area was plenty of SCI-FI morabelia books GN's etc, So if you live in Ashby and was installed today (Friday 23-4-10) by virgin media you seriously pissed me off but being the professional I am I bit my tongue.







VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 23 April, 2010, 11:18:11 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 23 April, 2010, 11:15:23 PMWe .... get the brunt of everything that is beyond our control. Why can't customers think before mouthing off.

I work in a call centre.

I feel your pain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 April, 2010, 11:39:26 PM
Britney's dad is making her wear a bra in public all the time. :(

Also the Spider-Man musical looks pretty dead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 April, 2010, 06:47:01 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 23 April, 2010, 11:15:23 PM
So if you live in Ashby and was installed today (Friday 23-4-10) by virgin media you seriously pissed me off but being the professional I am I bit my tongue.

Y'know what that guy needs, don't you V?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 April, 2010, 11:24:53 AM
My fridge freezer broke.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 April, 2010, 11:26:22 AM
Quote from: Mikey on 22 April, 2010, 01:46:27 PM
My cat.

This morning it had thrown most of it's litter onto the floor, seemingly so I could better see what a big shite it had done overnight. So I clean up the mess, and lift the tray only to find my cat managed to piss under it. So I cleaned that up too.

Then when I go back into the living room it had boked all over the sofa.

sigh

Ugh. Exile the damn thing to the garden shed!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 24 April, 2010, 11:36:20 AM
My car decided to crash itself, albeit really, really slowly last night. I had the handbrake "fixed" only last  month too.

I'd have posted this in the Life Spugs thread but on inspection there's no damage done. Those original Austin headlight peaks are made of strong stuff!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 April, 2010, 05:17:06 PM
After buying the wife another set of 'Egyptian' cotton bedding (Drokk it's costly) and putting it on the bed mere minutes ago, I have found a mark on 'my' cuffed pillow slip. So I'll be using the old cream slip until I can change it tomorrow.
White bed linnen, aaaargh! After nearly 18 years of marraige I finally caved in and bought 'WHITE' bed linnen ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 24 April, 2010, 10:45:57 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 24 April, 2010, 06:47:01 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 23 April, 2010, 11:15:23 PM
So if you live in Ashby and was installed today (Friday 23-4-10) by virgin media you seriously pissed me off but being the professional I am I bit my tongue.

Y'know what that guy needs, don't you V?

No I am not smashing his windows, unless he complains and it effects my monthly targets. I know where you live.







VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 April, 2010, 11:05:05 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 24 April, 2010, 10:45:57 PM
No I am not smashing his windows

Have you got monthly targets for that too?  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Lady Festina on 24 April, 2010, 11:22:25 PM
I moved house today (mostly) and left my mobile phone behind.... (a very minor impediment)...

And I really should learn how to reverse park a van. Or a car for that matter.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 25 April, 2010, 12:01:51 AM
Quote from: Lady Festina on 24 April, 2010, 11:22:25 PM
I moved house today (mostly) and left my mobile phone behind.... (a very minor impediment)...

And I really should learn how to reverse park a van. Or a car for that matter..... or drive in general.

There fixed that for you. ;)






VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 April, 2010, 12:17:00 AM
Silly ****ers in this block. 12am and I hear non-stop banging. Doors, windows and God knows what else. Non- ****ing stop. Then come the mornings, flat front doors start slamming. I don't understand the brains of some people. I bloody sleep with earplugs or in-ear earphones and I still get woken up in the mornings.

Sick of flats and inconsiderate morons. I already told the idiots upstairs a few weeks ago I could hear them walking with shoes at 2.15am. They cut that out but still I hear never ending knocking noises.

This block is solid concrete so we hardly hear any air borne noise but I don't see why some people need to keep on knocking stuff (baffled as to what it is) as that kind of noise really travels. I can't tell if it's coming from upstairs or downstairs.

I need to update the block rules list and give it to all residents to tell them to bloody be considerate after 11pm. Such a wind up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 April, 2010, 12:27:38 AM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 25 April, 2010, 12:17:00 AM
Silly ****ers in this block. 12am and I hear non-stop banging. Doors, windows and God knows what else. Non- ****ing stop. Then come the mornings, flat front doors start slamming. I don't understand the brains of some people. I bloody sleep with earplugs or in-ear earphones and I still get woken up in the mornings.

Sick of flats and inconsiderate morons. I already told the idiots upstairs a few weeks ago I could hear them walking with shoes at 2.15am. They cut that out but still I hear never ending knocking noises.

This block is solid concrete so we hardly hear any air borne noise but I don't see why some people need to keep on knocking stuff (baffled as to what it is) as that kind of noise really travels. I can't tell if it's coming from upstairs or downstairs.

I need to update the block rules list and give it to all residents to tell them to bloody be considerate after 11pm. Such a wind up.


You should sell up and move as soon as possible because you might just as well be trying to train monkeys by asking them to be considerate because the stress it is causing just isnt worth it if its ruining your quality of life at home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 April, 2010, 12:55:17 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 25 April, 2010, 12:27:38 AM
You should sell up and move as soon as possible because you might just as well be trying to train monkeys by asking them to be considerate because the stress it is causing just isnt worth it if its ruining your quality of life at home.
Yeah, I think like that sometimes, but unfortunately you never know what you're in for with flats. I've had it with conversions and noisy floorboards. We thought that things would be better in this purpose built block. At least the idiots downstairs will be away soon until the end of summer and then they are moving out officially, so we'll have peace from that direction at least. Until the next lot of noise makers move in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Lady Festina on 25 April, 2010, 06:37:47 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 25 April, 2010, 12:01:51 AM
Quote from: Lady Festina on 24 April, 2010, 11:22:25 PM
I moved house today (mostly) and left my mobile phone behind.... (a very minor impediment)...

And I really should learn how to reverse park a van. Or a car for that matter..... or drive in general.

There fixed that for you. ;)


You can go off someone you know.... Crossed London six times in two days without hitting anything. (Although, whilst parking today I did manage to nudge a car bumper and caress a fencepost....)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 April, 2010, 08:53:31 PM
The Co-op didn't have what I wanted and I was exposed to Coldplay. They had Starsailor on earlier in the week and all. Why the fuck should I even shop there anymore? Your life is in my hands, Jamie, don't ever forget that. I also trod on a snail.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 April, 2010, 06:07:12 PM
They edited out a cigarette based joke on this evening's C4 Simpsons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 April, 2010, 08:38:54 PM
My room smells of cigarettes for some reason.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 26 April, 2010, 08:51:33 PM
Was that where the joke ended up then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 April, 2010, 08:54:14 PM
I made the first post two hours ago.

How the hell am I supposed to remember what I did 2 hours ago?

Silly Gavin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 27 April, 2010, 11:37:48 AM
We did some work for a school and I invoiced them on 2nd March with usual 30 day terms. It's nearly May, but they still owe for this - a value of just over two grand.

When I was at school, there were lots of punishments for lateness, whether in terms of handing in work or attendance.

The irony...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 27 April, 2010, 06:03:46 PM
Trying on shirts at SuperDry today was akin to an Archeologist putting on the clobber of a recently bashed Nazi in an underground submarine dock.

I don't want to mention how many X's there were in the label of the shirt that wouldn't even come together, though i took off an M&S L shirt to try it on!

Thanks to Animal for an XL surfer shirt that fits like a tent. :)

East meets West i suppose?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 27 April, 2010, 06:25:08 PM
Selling my mum's house, probate and having fuck all money.  Or indeed fuck all of anything.  Whoop.  Beans and rice for dinner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 27 April, 2010, 06:52:49 PM
STILL, haven't managed to get into town for last wednesdays Prog. Am definitely going tomorrow, I don't care what happens.

Plus side I suppose, they should have two for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 April, 2010, 07:30:26 PM
Came back from Sam's music lesson at about 17:45 and as we walked through the house I asked Sam if he'd like to let the girls (chickens) out in the garden!
As I was about to open the conservatory door I noticed a bloody mangey looking fox stood rigid, watching them. That was it, I was out in a shot chasing the little bastard down the garden but it escaped over two fences and vanished. Sam thought it hilarious and Carolyn was a bit upset.

I have now placed the snares into position ready for our next 'up close' and final encounter. Those on Hi-Ex! know about the last fox encounter I had, lets say I'm one up in the living stakes  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 27 April, 2010, 07:50:22 PM
For some reason my laptop won't load Uncle Spunk Nugget vs Al-Quaeda Part 2. I must see the punchline!

It could be that it has been removed for obscene content or something like that but considering the other stuff on that site it would have to be pretty bloody bad for that to be the case. More likely just my crap machine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 27 April, 2010, 08:07:38 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 April, 2010, 07:30:26 PM
Came back from Sam's music lesson at about 17:45 and as we walked through the house I asked Sam if he'd like to let the girls (chickens) out in the garden!
As I was about to open the conservatory door I noticed a bloody mangey looking fox stood rigid, watching them. That was it, I was out in a shot chasing the little bastard down the garden but it escaped over two fences and vanished. Sam thought it hilarious and Carolyn was a bit upset.

I have now placed the snares into position ready for our next 'up close' and final encounter. Those on Hi-Ex! know about the last fox encounter I had, lets say I'm one up in the living stakes  ;)

We want pictures of the outcome.






VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 28 April, 2010, 10:27:52 PM
I've been quite enjoying the Rogue Trooper Case Files. I've read the majority of the stories in some form before, but it's pretty fun with some nice art. However, whether it's the writer, the letterer or the editor to blame, the continual misspelling of "personas" is really starting to bug my tits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 29 April, 2010, 12:50:45 PM
Quote from: Mike Gloady on 27 April, 2010, 06:25:08 PM
Selling my mum's house, probate and having fuck all money.  Or indeed fuck all of anything.  Whoop.  Beans and rice for dinner.

It's good to see you view it as a minor impediment Mike; someday you can look back with a sigh of relief it's all over.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 April, 2010, 03:23:33 PM
Outside where i live in the street is a green junction box with all of the localised cable internet connections inside that is owned by Virgin Media who are my ISP.The box is wide open to the street with the removable panel that is meant to be locked just lying on the pavement leaving all of the internet connections vulnerable to vandalism etc.

I reported this to Virgin as its a hazard and an obstruction and in the meantime i taped it shut.So today there was a Virgin Tec guy working inside the box so i hoped that he would fix the lock as well which Virgin said they would do .

Today i get home and the box is still wide open with the removable panel lying across the pavement so now i have to go and tape it up again.

Fucking useless idiots.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 April, 2010, 08:29:56 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 April, 2010, 03:23:33 PM
Outside where i live in the street is a green junction box with all of the localised cable internet connections inside that is owned by Virgin Media who are my ISP.The box is wide open to the street with the removable panel that is meant to be locked just lying on the pavement leaving all of the internet connections vulnerable to vandalism etc.

I reported this to Virgin as its a hazard and an obstruction and in the meantime i taped it shut.So today there was a Virgin Tec guy working inside the box so i hoped that he would fix the lock as well which Virgin said they would do .

Today i get home and the box is still wide open with the removable panel lying across the pavement so now i have to go and tape it up again.

Fucking useless idiots.

I cant speak for the idiot that left the base unit unlocked but I come across BU's that are un-secure I make it a priority to secure to the best of my ability. We don't carry the necessary equpt to repair them so all we can do is report it to the proper department. All I suggest you do is report it again and tell them that an engineer was round and did nothing to re-secure it, I just hope it was someone from service as they are a bunch of wankers.
We are not all idiots Pete, just the odd few.






VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 30 April, 2010, 12:07:25 PM
I see that happen quite a lot. Are all the green ones Virgin?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 30 April, 2010, 01:15:55 PM
I went all the way into town today and only then realised my wallet was in another jacket. Arsebiscuits!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 April, 2010, 04:51:12 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 29 April, 2010, 08:29:56 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 April, 2010, 03:23:33 PM
Outside where i live in the street is a green junction box with all of the localised cable internet connections inside that is owned by Virgin Media who are my ISP.The box is wide open to the street with the removable panel that is meant to be locked just lying on the pavement leaving all of the internet connections vulnerable to vandalism etc.

I reported this to Virgin as its a hazard and an obstruction and in the meantime i taped it shut.So today there was a Virgin Tec guy working inside the box so i hoped that he would fix the lock as well which Virgin said they would do .

Today i get home and the box is still wide open with the removable panel lying across the pavement so now i have to go and tape it up again.

Fucking useless idiots.

I cant speak for the idiot that left the base unit unlocked but I come across BU's that are un-secure I make it a priority to secure to the best of my ability. We don't carry the necessary equpt to repair them so all we can do is report it to the proper department. All I suggest you do is report it again and tell them that an engineer was round and did nothing to re-secure it, I just hope it was someone from service as they are a bunch of wankers.
We are not all idiots Pete, just the odd few.






VNP

Yes i realise that as i was just sounding off but prior to that i have never had a bad word to say about Virgin and that includes two home visits from your department.

I had a faulty Modem and Virgin sent a Tech guy with a replacement the following morning after it failed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 30 April, 2010, 05:05:13 PM
Tripped upstairs at lunchtime and cracked my kneecap right on the sharp edge of the wooden stairs.  Blimey, it hurt.  Managed to hang on to my home made falafel in pittas with salsa and yummy minty yoghurt sauce though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 30 April, 2010, 11:11:24 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 30 April, 2010, 12:07:25 PM
I see that happen quite a lot. Are all the green ones Virgin?

Nah BT have green ones as well, theirs are the scruffy ones that look 100 years old.








VNP
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 01 May, 2010, 12:17:46 AM
Brendan, my young fella, spilled by cup of tea over the keyboard, making it very hard to type with sticky keys!

David
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 01 May, 2010, 12:00:23 PM
A cheeky bugger offerred 30k under the asking price on my mum's house.  I want to punch the little git.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 01 May, 2010, 09:39:58 PM
Yet again I accidentally pee'd on the end of my dressing gown cord this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 May, 2010, 10:05:44 PM
Keep forgetting to read Sagat's win quotes. TIGER TIGER TIGER TIGER TIGER.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Daveycandlish on 01 May, 2010, 11:04:41 PM
How could I have forgotten all about free comic book day?!

Arse.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 03 May, 2010, 06:02:42 PM
After 11 days off, I go back to work tomorrow. Leaving the missus with a four week old baby, and two other children.

No more staying up 'til midnight, drinking a beer, playing Fallout 3 and posting here. No more trying to do one page scripts.

Back to shuffling paper!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 May, 2010, 06:27:15 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 03 May, 2010, 06:02:42 PM
No more staying up 'til midnight, drinking a beer, playing Fallout 3 and posting here.

What kind of baby was this, exactly?  'Cos I've plainly been getting the wrong model.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 03 May, 2010, 06:40:48 PM
I started choking on my glass of Robinsons and spat out my drink over the revision notes I spent over 2 hours writing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 03 May, 2010, 06:41:04 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 03 May, 2010, 06:27:15 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 03 May, 2010, 06:02:42 PM
No more staying up 'til midnight, drinking a beer, playing Fallout 3 and posting here.

What kind of baby was this, exactly?  'Cos I've plainly been getting the wrong model.

he was staying up playing fallout to keep him from dropping off thus enabling him to give mrs x a chance of a sleep and see to the baby  without calling attention to his selflessness ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 03 May, 2010, 07:19:07 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 03 May, 2010, 06:27:15 PM

What kind of baby was this, exactly?  'Cos I've plainly been getting the wrong model.

Heh, by the time you get to number three you know what you're doing. Or, rather, what you're not. No more stressing about every sound, giving a dummy to the little sod before he gets up a head of steam, not worrying about personal hygiene (oh, maybe that's just me).

Long answer: Mrs X is breastfeeding and will be for a few more weeks. The baby's fed at 6pm and sleeps 7pm till around 10.30pm. Mrs X sits in bed and watches telly when she gives that feed, so there's no point in me sitting around. I come to bed when he's all fed, I burp him and change him and then we all "sleep".

In my defence, for the last two weeks I've been entertaining the other two from 7am to 7pm. Well, except when the oldest has been at nursery.

When we shift onto bottles it'll be the same for a few weeks; I'll stay up and do the 10.30 feed, and the Missus will do the 2am shift. She'll go to bed about 9 to make up for lost sleep and I'll play with my... Xbox.

Short answer: GINA FORD.

Seriously, ignore any critics, her Contented Baby books are god-sends. It's like an instruction manual for babies.

Following her programme (and it is a programme; it accounts for almost every minute of every day), our first was sleeping through the night 7 until 7 at six weeks, and the second doing the same at 12 weeks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 03 May, 2010, 07:28:27 PM
These people I know that are usually quite interesting keep talking about their kids and it's really boring.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 May, 2010, 07:29:04 PM
Rot your enigmatic soul, Dr. X.  

Interesting reply!  Our first (a boy) was no bother sleeping through the night after a month, our second (a girl) still wakes us twice a night at 7 months, despite us applying exactly the same carefully worked-out routine (or so we believe).  OTOH she's a gem during the day, happily playing away on her own and singing to herself, while I'm fairly sure that The Boy required constant interaction to amusing him until he was about 2.  Not that I'd swap either of them, of course.  Except for some original McMahon Sky Chariots splashes.  Gina Ford you say.

I know you can't mean me, Roger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 03 May, 2010, 08:26:24 PM
Gina even comes with a handy solutions to common problems, with worked examples on things like sleeplessness.

I can't believe I just typed that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 May, 2010, 09:25:46 PM
I married a nanny, kids might not come with a manual but I got the next best thing.

Anyway, back on topic-

I did some jobs around the house this weekend and I found myself hoarding up all of the odd bit's of wood I had left because they will probably come in useful for something. According to my wife that now makes me middle aged.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 03 May, 2010, 10:18:31 PM
Its a bank holiday and I've just done a 14 hour shift.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 03 May, 2010, 10:36:19 PM
...going to  the hospital on friday for hopefully my marching orders/all clear etc...in this thread 'cos its always a bit of a shit week just in case....even though i've been ok for the last 5 years since the chemo.i am a worrier and cant help it so heres to friday and a new entry iin the drokkin fantastic thread. :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 03 May, 2010, 10:36:49 PM
I'm designing some learning materials to help out my lady (who's a teacher) and she insists that I use Comic Sans. Gah!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 03 May, 2010, 10:38:36 PM
i love comic sans! reminds me of the re:action figure packaging! :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 May, 2010, 11:34:54 PM
My minor impediment is that keeping rabbits is a lot more complicated now than it was even 20 years ago. The size of hutch now recommended for minimum welfare standards is a bit beyond the reach of this month's pay check, they sell them hardly anywhere, and they won't fit in the back of my car. Plus nowadays you're expected to keep two rabbits in a hutch together rather than keeping just one with only people for company. You're also recommended to get them neutered, at some expense, to curb their temperament.

When I was a kid you kept an un-neutered rabbit on its own in a 4' hutch and let it run around the garden from 8am to 9pm every day. Life was much simpler then.
:|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 03 May, 2010, 11:52:03 PM
Criminy, Mog, didn't know about your illness issues (I'm guessing cancer?) Hope you get the news you want.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 04 May, 2010, 12:08:37 AM
Hope all goes well, Mogzilla.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 May, 2010, 12:25:19 AM
Yeah, me too. Sounds like what you've been through has been very unpleasant and frightening. Hope the result is all clear for you come Friday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 May, 2010, 01:30:06 PM
Aye, break a leg Mog.    Unless it's the leg that's the problem, of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 04 May, 2010, 06:09:22 PM
cheers folks...should be ok after no hiccups after 5 years yes it was cancer of the gentlemens vegetables thinking of changing my user name to lefty! ;)


and to add a new impedement...mini mog has just been diagnosed with asthma today afeter 5 weeks of a bugger of a cough that justwouldnt go away three doctor trips just fobbed us off but the one today actually spotted it well done that woman!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 May, 2010, 08:22:31 PM
FLY FUCKING HIGHER, HELICOPTER
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 May, 2010, 08:52:44 PM
I just forgot to bid on an Ebay auction i was watching and it just ended.

FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT

I hate it when that happens.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 04 May, 2010, 08:53:37 PM
I found out Roger wants to take me away in a van.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 05 May, 2010, 10:33:41 AM
I've just lost most of the morning to the "Antispyware Soft" Virus which is a nasty little fucker.

A remider to everyone to keep their Antiviruses up-to-date.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 05 May, 2010, 10:41:01 AM
I managed to write 60+ pages of comic script in the past three days, and now I'm back in the stupid office.
I want to go back to writing comics!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 May, 2010, 01:20:40 PM
tbh I count being in the stupid office as a major impediment.

/similarly afflicted
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 May, 2010, 05:24:20 PM
Two FUCKING cards from the postman today  >:( >:( >:(

One is for some Dredd stuff that the bastard didn't use the brass knocker to wake me up with and the other is to pay £13.86 for a bloody customs charge for another Dredd item  >:D >:D >:D

I blame this Labour government!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 May, 2010, 11:35:38 PM
That was one disgusting turd.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 May, 2010, 04:41:11 PM
Bollocks!

The customs parcel was the 'Gothic Garage Death' model and as soon as the postal bod passed me the thing I knew it was smashed to pieces. The fucker hadn't even put any filling in the box to pad it out. I wandered off to the comic shop, where I opened it to sounds of disgust from all inside. The seller had said that one foot and one leg had a clean break, so that was acceptable. On opening the parcel, both arms snapped and one hand in about 7 pieces, brilliant!

I am just about to get in touch with this idiot seller and ask why he didn't protect the bloody thing, before he gets shit feedback.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 07 May, 2010, 05:27:22 PM
What a fucker! Any chance of getting a refund?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 May, 2010, 07:52:00 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 07 May, 2010, 05:27:22 PM
What a fucker! Any chance of getting a refund?

Get this reply he sent:- I'm very sorry,, the shipper sends out model kits all the time. My guess is that he did not look at the kit inside, assuming it was prepacked by the kit manufacture.
I handed him the kit with assurance it would be packed properly.
I can refund you the shipping...
so at least I'll get something out of it  ::)

My limited skills can't fix this but I shall try to find someone who can!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 May, 2010, 10:13:01 PM
I can't figure out if Jared really has a problem with people reviving old threads or if he (or she, I suppose; I don't even know that much) is just joking.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 07 May, 2010, 10:58:11 PM
Niggled with a headache all day at work, got home about 5 and slept it off. Now fully awake still with a slight pain in my head and still have work in the morning.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 May, 2010, 11:04:33 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 07 May, 2010, 10:13:01 PM
I can't figure out if Jared really has a problem with people reviving old threads or if he (or she, I suppose; I don't even know that much) is just joking.

It used to be Max's job to get worked up aboot necroposting and he's paying tribute to the dearly departed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 May, 2010, 12:19:22 AM
The A406 underpass at Chingford is closed, what a bloody nightmare I had trying to avoid the cars trying to jump in front of me from all lanes  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 08 May, 2010, 08:44:10 AM
i promoted my secretary/PA to use the new term, to a job in membership, better money, better hours, she deserved it.
but now we dont have any work permits to employ a new one, and locals are not that common for such posts.

i have to spend time doing my own reports,
really need to learn how to use spell check.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 May, 2010, 01:46:18 PM
I've just bought a new touch-screen phone because my old one kept cutting out and telling me I had an 'invalid battery'. It's making me feel old and incompetent 'cos I haven't got a  clue what I'm doing with it. Took me all morning to transfer my contacts, and scrolling around the touch screen is weird - I'm prodding, stabbing and sliding all over the shop, and if I get to the screen I want, it's more luck than judgement. The e-mail and web functions may as well be sorcery.

I remember when I used to roll my eyes at my parents being unable to set the video, but now I know how they felt!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 May, 2010, 01:57:00 PM
I know how you feel DDD, I had great fun moving from a Nokia to a HTC touchscreen but it was worth it in the end. The net is always at my fingers and so are you lot on here  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 May, 2010, 07:19:25 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 May, 2010, 01:57:00 PM
I know how you feel DDD, I had great fun moving from a Nokia to a HTC touchscreen but it was worth it in the end. The net is always at my fingers and so are you lot on here  ;)

:o does anyone else feel dirty?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 May, 2010, 09:21:07 PM
1 year and 3 weeks before I'm 25. Might as well stock up on zimmerframes now.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 09 May, 2010, 11:25:10 PM
Not made it out to a comic shop for 3 weeks and am suffering Thrill Power withdrawal symptoms.

On the plus side, the first two corners of the green house base (concrete foundation and bricks) are actually level.  It's on quite a slope so I'm impressed I got the sums and digging right.  But next time, she gets a ring.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:43:01 AM
A member of Joker squad, Darman from Omega squad and Scorch from Delta squad have gone AWOL and it is doing my head in.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 May, 2010, 01:04:05 AM
Why cant the BBC Weather website show what the windspeeds and directions are over the UK ?

Where is that information or is it irrelevent ?

I work outside quite a lot and i need to know about windspeed and directions.

Stupid

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 10 May, 2010, 07:24:54 AM
Try this Peter...

http://www.xcweather.co.uk/ (http://www.xcweather.co.uk/)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 May, 2010, 08:02:06 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:43:01 AM
A member of Joker squad, Darman from Omega squad and Scorch from Delta squad have gone AWOL and it is doing my head in.

This is what you get for allowing flame-haired temptresses become Stormtroopers.  I'd check nearby motels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 May, 2010, 08:08:18 AM
Quote from: Kerrin on 10 May, 2010, 07:24:54 AM
Try this Peter...

http://www.xcweather.co.uk/ (http://www.xcweather.co.uk/)

I use Accuweather for wind forecasts for sailing - it's pretty amazingly accurate, down to the nearest hour.  This one is for Beachy Head, which isn't a million miles from you, but you can probably get closer:

http://www.accuweather.com/ukie/sailing-forecast.asp?partner=accuweather&traveler=0&site=26EG;Beachy%20Head


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 May, 2010, 12:29:22 PM
Thanks for that TB and Kerrin.

I have to know this because i often work up scaffolding and sometimes on roofs so i have to know about wind speeds etc because i have to keep the workplace and materials secure and for many other reasons.

Not that it matters at present because i have no work but its starting to pick up again plus the fact i just talked to the VAT office and they are saying themselves that businesses are filing higher value returns which means that some kind of recovery is happening although its quite slow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gavin_Leahy_Block on 10 May, 2010, 12:32:50 PM
I've been trying to get a large chunk of my money transferred from my Irish account to a newly set up Australian account and the Bank of Ireland have been pissing me off for the last two hours.

[rant]First, I asked my father to see if he would be able to transfer the money from the account, but they told him that I would have to send them a signed letter with all the details from both accounts to them. While I'm sure that the post system is very secure here, I know that Irish one is not. I phoned them up with my complaint and asked if a fax would be sufficient, but they said it needed to be a hand written letter. Worst of all is that the person on the phone not only knew me, but she also knew both my parents. I think I have something sorted now though.[/rant]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:49:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 May, 2010, 08:02:06 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:43:01 AM
A member of Joker squad, Darman from Omega squad and Scorch from Delta squad have gone AWOL and it is doing my head in.

This is what you get for allowing flame-haired temptresses become Stormtroopers.  I'd check nearby motels.

UPDATE

Darman has been found in the Galactic hero's millenium falcon cock pit sporting Asajj Ventress's lightsaber for protection, along with Scorch's back pack and Indy's hat. Still no sign of Scorch or Hondo Karr.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 May, 2010, 01:00:28 PM
Hmmm, that Hondo is a scoundrel and no mistake.  Chances are he and Aurra Sing have Scorch imprisoned somewhere (is that original Scorch or multi-pack Scorch, BTW?).  Have you checked Slave 1's hold?  

My Concept Art Anakin Skywalker figure is the one most prone to unscheduled offworld travel.  For some reason The Boy prefers him to the sanctioned Anakin he owns.

Of more concern is Iggle Piggle's regular hijacking of the Playskool X-Wing, with Makka Pakka in the droid slot.  Not unamusingly The Boy refers to this lethal fighter ace as "Blue Five".

And Gavin:  Irish Banks are unhelpful scum, by policy.  They're attempting to balance up for being overly 'helpful' for 10 years while there was imaginary money in it for them.  Two wrongs, however...


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 11 May, 2010, 10:55:21 PM
Not only has my PC stopped connecting to the internet for no discernible reason right when I need it for far too many things, but the first thing I see when I manage to get the use of someone else's for half an hour is that David Cameron's the prime minister.

At the moment both of these are, (highly aggravating), minor impediments. I'm hoping they don't both develop into something for the "life spugs" thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 11 May, 2010, 11:16:32 PM
The country already is in the life spugs stage, the only way is up....eventually...







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 12 May, 2010, 03:27:29 AM
Fixed the problem with my PC. Turned out to be corrupt files.

I can't help thinking there's something strangely appropriate and ironic about that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 May, 2010, 11:05:19 PM
Thornton's toffee is brilliant for removing dental crowns.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 13 May, 2010, 08:44:59 AM
So, aside from losing a crown to the worlds gloopiest toffee yesterday, I also received a birthday card from my brother, already opened and sans money, and my expected copy of Arkham Asylum GOTY was also very conspicuous in it's absence from my mail delivery.

To top it all off, it took so long to get the Birthday Curry I ordered that I didn't have time to watch Avatar last night (Every time I plan on watching that film something gets in the fucking way and I still haven't even seen it once yet :'()

Somewhere a member of her majesty's postal service is probably living the birthday I had planned for myself yesterday, I'll probably come home early and find him enjoying the birthday shag that I never got last night because the wife felt too full after her curry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 13 May, 2010, 09:50:55 AM
There's a cat in me greenhouse what am I gonna do?
There's a cat in me greenhouse what am I gonna do?
I'm gonna replace the broken pane of glass the fucking thing left when it panicked, forgot how it got in there and made its own exit via the side.
That's what I'm gonna do.

Sigh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 13 May, 2010, 11:21:10 AM
... bitches!
I'm sure dating wasn't this complicated in the 90s. All this texting etiquette bollocks
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 May, 2010, 11:27:22 AM
... because what I thought was a Mini DVI -> DVI adaptor was actually a Mini DisplayPort -> DVI adaptor, meaning that I now have a shiny new Cintiq and no way to connect the fucking thing to my computer.

In other news, a week after it was supposedly dispatched, my copy of CS5 has still not appeared.

Cock.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 13 May, 2010, 11:52:43 AM
Quote from: worldshown on 13 May, 2010, 09:50:55 AM
There's a cat in me greenhouse what am I gonna do?
There's a cat in me greenhouse what am I gonna do?
I'm gonna replace the broken pane of glass the fucking thing left when it panicked, forgot how it got in there and made its own exit via the side.
That's what I'm gonna do.

THAT WAS EXTREME
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 13 May, 2010, 06:49:33 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:49:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 May, 2010, 08:02:06 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:43:01 AM
A member of Joker squad, Darman from Omega squad and Scorch from Delta squad have gone AWOL and it is doing my head in.
This is what you get for allowing flame-haired temptresses become Stormtroopers.  I'd check nearby motels.
UPDATE
Darman has been found in the Galactic hero's millenium falcon cock pit sporting Asajj Ventress's lightsaber for protection, along with Scorch's back pack and Indy's hat. Still no sign of Scorch or Hondo Karr.

UPDATE

Not a chance of finding the MIA's, even had disturbed and sleepless nights wondering where they are.
I have given in and my Hondo Karr has arrived from an E-BAY purchase now bidding on a Scorch, (Which was a single figure rather than the Delta set)






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 13 May, 2010, 06:56:44 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 13 May, 2010, 11:27:22 AM
In other news, a week after it was supposedly dispatched, my copy of CS5 has still not appeared.

I didn't know CS5 existed...  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 May, 2010, 07:16:10 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 13 May, 2010, 06:56:44 PM
I didn't know CS5 existed...  :-\

Probably a bigger deal for Mac users than PC ones, TBH, since CS5 for Mac is proper 64-bit whereas the Windows version went 64-bit with CS4. It only came out about a week or so ago, I think.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 13 May, 2010, 07:32:37 PM
Ooh, a Cintiq AND a copy of CS5, very nice. It's a bugger about the cable and delivery but still, ooh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 May, 2010, 09:57:30 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 13 May, 2010, 07:32:37 PM
Ooh, a Cintiq AND a copy of CS5, very nice. It's a bugger about the cable and delivery but still, ooh.

Had access to some finance, and with tax increases and a VAT hike on the horizon, I thought now might be the time for a splurge. :-)

Got a copy of Snow Leopard while I was at it, so the weekend is going to be spent upgrading the OS, Creative Suite and getting the CIntiq installed. That's going to be interesting!

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 14 May, 2010, 07:34:09 AM
I bet 50p and a Cornetto that you swear at least once.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 14 May, 2010, 07:41:29 AM
Quote from: Kerrin on 14 May, 2010, 07:34:09 AM
I bet 50p and a Cornetto that you swear at least once.

I think they'll be able to hear me swearing in the next county, TBH!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 14 May, 2010, 08:16:16 AM
I recommend a large supply of tea and biscuits to take the edge off the whole process!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 14 May, 2010, 08:39:21 AM
Jim - are you getting an entire suite?

I'm using a trial of InDesign CS5 at the mo which yesterday made me swear very loudly on numerous occasions. Adobe - put stuff in, don't take stuff out...!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 May, 2010, 12:39:31 PM
I can't ignore the mods  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 14 May, 2010, 04:13:01 PM
What I would like is for a Cintiq crossed with a tablet/iwotsit.

That would be worth saving up for/winning the lottery.

Minor impediments -
being tired all the flipping time because I'm bored at work.
having purple on my hands everytime I wash my hair
not having any Rollos right now
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 14 May, 2010, 04:27:27 PM
Quote from: Banners on 14 May, 2010, 08:39:21 AM
I'm using a trial of InDesign CS5 at the mo which yesterday made me swear very loudly on numerous occasions. Adobe - put stuff in, don't take stuff out...!

Yeah ... I need Illustrator, and I can use Photoshop, so I'd be stupid not to get the suite.

I know it's desperately unfashionable to say so, and ironic given that I was one of the ones leading the charge to ditch Quark circa ID 2.0, but I've been using Quark 8 for about the last year, and I rather like it.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 14 May, 2010, 04:41:34 PM
My housemate got CS5 the other day and I've been watching over their shoulder. I shall take the plunge after dissertation - figuring out Illustrator with the help of Mr Campbell's brilliant tutorial has been tough. Yet rewarding. Like a turd off a cliff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 May, 2010, 10:14:30 PM
I went to bed for a while earlier and just before i woke up i dreamt i was back in New Guinea or one of the small islands around it and it was just as i remembered it and i was saying that i had been waiting years to be back here again and then i woke up and realised it was all a dream.

:( :(

It seemed so real as well.


Oh well Back to reality again  :(

What a complete drag.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 May, 2010, 11:06:27 AM
The mighty Acid Mothers Temple are playing in Britain this month, but the furthest north they're coming is Birmingham. They're in Brighton on 27th, Peter. You should go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 15 May, 2010, 11:30:44 AM
My prog came through the post slightly creased and folded. Damn you postman.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 15 May, 2010, 12:02:59 PM
Quote from: Banners on 14 May, 2010, 08:39:21 AM
Jim - are you getting an entire suite?

Apparently not. Just filed a complaint with Amazon about the seller.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 16 May, 2010, 02:13:43 AM
Minor Impediment #1 I can't type the word that. Every time I type anything I have to go back over it with a fine tooth comb and change all the taht's to that.

I did it typing the first sentence of this post. Even when I'm typing about not being able to type it I can't type it. What is it about the ha that I just can't get it in the right order. I don't have this problem with anything else.

It's winding me up something rotten.

Minor Impediment #2   Flying Commas. I was talking to my nephew about punctuation because while he is pretty good at reading individual words his grasp of overall sentence structure is pretty weak. He mentioned 'flying commas' Although it's obvious in hindsight I actually had to get him to show me in a book what he meant. Apostrophes.

I spoke to his teacher at the pick up point last night and she explained that one of  the other parents had taught their son, who had spread it around the class. When I asked what she said when she heard it she said she hadn't done anything because "it's as good a name as any". No. As good a name as any for an apostrophe is fucking apostrophe. I swear, it took all my self control not to laugh in her face. Milfy goodness or not, if he was my own kid I'd be giving her a mouthful. 

This is two years in a row. I'm hoping that 3rd times the charm and he gets someone halfway decent next year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 16 May, 2010, 08:56:11 PM
I think my teacher called them flying commas - maybe it was an 70s thing. Anyway, I grew up knowing about apostrophes so the nippers should be okay.

I didn't grow up understanding either metric or imperial very well, mind. Very confused teachers and parents at that time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 16 May, 2010, 09:54:25 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 13 May, 2010, 06:49:33 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:49:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 May, 2010, 08:02:06 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 May, 2010, 12:43:01 AM
A member of Joker squad, Darman from Omega squad and Scorch from Delta squad have gone AWOL and it is doing my head in.
This is what you get for allowing flame-haired temptresses become Stormtroopers.  I'd check nearby motels.
UPDATE
Darman has been found in the Galactic hero's millenium falcon cock pit sporting Asajj Ventress's lightsaber for protection, along with Scorch's back pack and Indy's hat. Still no sign of Scorch or Hondo Karr.
UPDATE
Not a chance of finding the MIA's, even had disturbed and sleepless nights wondering where they are.
I have given in and my Hondo Karr has arrived from an E-BAY purchase now bidding on a Scorch, (Which was a single figure rather than the Delta set)

Final Update

Found both Scorch and Hondo cowering behind one of the CD racks half way up the stairs. The piss off is that I spent £7 replacing Hondo.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 16 May, 2010, 11:38:12 PM
I waved my dripping hands under the dryer but a gust of warm air was not forthcoming.

I gave it a little tap on the side, but still no joy. A harder clout to the front of it still didn't produce the desired effect.

I was just about to give up and dry them on my trousers when the guy behind me proclaimed "That's a paper towel dispenser mate"

I felt such a twat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 17 May, 2010, 08:34:19 AM
I'm off for a blood test this morning - anyone care to take my place?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 17 May, 2010, 09:37:37 AM
I left facebook to avoid the needless drama etc. and somehow the bastards found me on twitter and cajoled me into following them back.

Now I get a constant stream of awkward flirting over twitter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 May, 2010, 12:20:22 AM
Drokk it, I'm sat at work looking on here, playing games and reading emails. The killer is that Bolt-01 has sent me an email with an attachment, this is a preliminary sketch of a piece he is doing for me and I can't open it until I get home  ::)
If you have ever seen the piece he did of Rich & Vicky, you'll know what I'm after!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 May, 2010, 01:15:10 PM
Ouch. 

I crocked my right ankle playing five a side* last night. A rather hard kick into the underside of somebody else's boot.  And now I can barely walk so I've ended up working from home.  Don't think it's broken or anything.





*Yes, hard to believe that a sauropod of my age and weight plays football but I do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 May, 2010, 06:18:18 PM
People who constantly get in the way either in shops [especially women] and on pavements and especially the self-important Twat who deliberately got in my way while i was crossing the street in their oversized Porsche Cayenne Twatmobile.Another idiot in a Mercedes nearly drove into me who turned the corner too fast without paying attention and without consideration for others.This driver looked like a Geezer who was about to give me a load of belligerant abuse until i fixed him with a stare that said dont even think about it.

Honestly Brighton is overstocked with these idiots and twats of every other description.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 May, 2010, 04:11:25 AM
Pop up windows that keep appearing on my screen asking if i know what my credit rating is.

I dont know what my credit rating is and i am not interested and if i want to know i will find out for myself rather than it being asked or prompted all the time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 May, 2010, 08:42:43 AM
Had an unpleasant turdvomit about an hour ago and I currently dwell in stomach purgatory: Am I still feeling ill or am I in fact ravenous?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 19 May, 2010, 09:51:10 AM
Quote from: James S on 13 May, 2010, 11:21:10 AM
I'm sure dating wasn't this complicated in the 90s. All this texting etiquette bollocks
It has it's uses.  When I was single, I spotted a nutter nice and early when she texted on the way to the FIRST DATE. 

The text included no capital letters, no correct grammar or spelling, was FULL of txtspk and included "lol" and "rofl" - I view all these as "idiot markers" so arranged an "urgent call" giving me an "out"

An OUT which I took.  So don't knock it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 May, 2010, 02:44:19 PM
These frigging envelopes that you either do need to lick to close them and the other kind that you dont.

I can never tell the difference so after licking the non-lick variety i have to end up using sellotape to close them as the glue no longer sticks.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 May, 2010, 01:11:17 AM
Apologies for another double post.

I sort of had a feeling something was up just as i had finished drying after having a bath .I turned the light off upstairs and opened the window and looked out into the courtyard and after about 20 seconds i noticed someone standing just inside the gate and they were just staring at the house.So i watched this individual for about 10 seconds and then asked if they were looking for something.He replied and said that he "had the wrong address and was looking for his mates house"

So i said you have definately got the wrong address so go and look elsewhere.Then he left right away.

I just found it a bit creepy the way that he was just standing there completly still just staring.

I also looked outside to see if Sylvester [A Cat] wanted to be let inside after being out for a few hours.

To add to that at about @2.30 - 3.00am the night before i heard footsteps walking into the courtyard but i didnt hear anyone go into either house besides mine.So i waited about 30 seconds before
i turned the light off up here to look out the window or even go out to confront who ever it was and just as i was about to go and do that they left.

A couple of nights before that i think i heard something as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 21 May, 2010, 06:10:44 PM
Vodafone customer service. Couldn't be less helpful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 21 May, 2010, 07:19:00 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 21 May, 2010, 06:10:44 PM
Vodafone customer service. Couldn't be less helpful.

Smite them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 21 May, 2010, 07:22:44 PM
Not good, Peter. Be vigilant! :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 May, 2010, 07:46:16 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 21 May, 2010, 07:22:44 PM
Not good, Peter. Be vigilant! :)

A friend of mine who lives in  a basement flat in a square along the road was a victim of unlawful entry just recently.This was during the day and he was in the flat.He is over 70 but still physically fit and is ex-forces/intelligence but the intruder pulled a knife so he chose not to fight back.The intruder was under the influence of drugs apparently.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 21 May, 2010, 10:52:39 PM
Pete arm yourself with a cam corder set on night vision and a baseball bat.  Then post the results on you tube.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 22 May, 2010, 09:38:26 AM
Grrrr, last night it was too warm to sleep with the windows closed and the idiot chavs in the park at the end of my road were making a ton of noise until stupid o'clock this morning. My first proper weekend off for ages and I am all tired a grumpy now.
I hope it fucking rains tonight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 May, 2010, 02:16:35 PM
it's the hottest day of the year and I missed most of it by sleeping till 2pm. I'm up now but with a stonking hangover from a very good 40th birthday last night. I plan to spend the rest of the day vegetating in the sunshine, smoking weed and reading comics. Actually, this may be in the wrong thread!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 22 May, 2010, 02:32:11 PM
Computer is infected with something nasty. Repair guys seem fairly positive but what was supposed to take a couple of days already stretching into a week. Bah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 May, 2010, 04:58:01 PM
I lost an Ebay auction because i was not able to be present online when the auction ended.

Still it had no bids at 99p this morning so i entered a high maximum bid so the winner had to outbid my maximum bid which in turn cost the winner a lot more cash.

:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 May, 2010, 08:35:21 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 May, 2010, 02:16:35 PM
it's the hottest day of the year and I missed most of it by sleeping till 2pm. I'm up now but with a stonking hangover from a very good 40th birthday last night. I plan to spend the rest of the day vegetating in the sunshine, smoking weed and reading comics. Actually, this may be in the wrong thread!  :D

Congrats on the 40th.  Sounds like you had a cracker.  That's next for me, having just turned 39.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 May, 2010, 09:33:27 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 22 May, 2010, 08:35:21 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 May, 2010, 02:16:35 PM
it's the hottest day of the year and I missed most of it by sleeping till 2pm. I'm up now but with a stonking hangover from a very good 40th birthday last night.

Congrats on the 40th.  Sounds like you had a cracker.  That's next for me, having just turned 39.
Wasn't my birthday, I actually don't know the person that well, but we have lots of friends in common. It was in my old local which I haven't been in for years, saw lots of old faces and don't remember staggering home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 22 May, 2010, 10:25:16 PM
Finding either a buyer for my mum's old house OR a place I can afford is proving difficult.

Also there wasn't QUITE enough wind today to justify my brother and I taking his kids on a "let's fly daddy's expensive kite" mission.  Meant to be for the kids, really for us.  I want one. 

I'll settle for a house though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 23 May, 2010, 09:23:33 AM
A kite and a house Mike? I suggest that you don't watch "Up". It might give you ideas. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 23 May, 2010, 09:53:57 AM
Ha!  Nice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 May, 2010, 09:58:37 AM
There was a man called Mike
Who turned his house into a kite...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 May, 2010, 12:41:07 PM
I went all the way to the boot fair only to find it was cancelled.On a day like today as well.

Fucking useless.

GRRRRRR
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 23 May, 2010, 01:32:06 PM
It is too damn hot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 May, 2010, 06:50:07 PM
There's a nasty smell outside, like [spoiler]sun-baked dog shit and piss[/spoiler]. I'm sure it can't be coming from my rabbits or their hutch as I cleaned it out today and didn't disturb anything that smelled as nasty as that. It definitely smells of carnivore/omnivore doings, but I've no idea where it's coming from. A few of my immediate neighbours keep cats, but there's not a dog within two gardens as far as I know. I wish whoever's garden it's coming from would sort it out and hose their patio down with immediate effect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 May, 2010, 09:39:17 PM
I was ill on my last day off but it had all cleared by work return day. Now a new working week is done it appears my stomach is once again opposed to the notion of this girl having fun.

Nevertheless I opted to go for a walk.

"Are you going to the Co-op"
"Well, I might"
"Can you get a Sunday Mirror. I got one so I could get the World Cup wallchart for Patrick but it wasn't in it. It costs £1 and you could have got it for free at work from the canteen copy if only you had known"

Patrick is 18. or 17. If only I had known.

The ice cream had departed the Co-op. All except the obviously overpriced stuff. I opted to console myself with Co-op Cava Brut. It is insipid crap. This is not a drunken rant.

I missed the first 15 minutes of Money. Pete Campbell sounds all funny all of a sudden.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 23 May, 2010, 09:52:48 PM
But were there any Frosties left in the box when you got up this morning Roger? If so....what are you complaining about??
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 May, 2010, 09:57:06 PM
At what point did I ever give you the impression that I am someone who has "breakfast" more than 3 or 4 times a year?

EDIT: Another minor impediment is that I had to edit this post to include a question markat the end of the above sentence.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 23 May, 2010, 10:04:57 PM
That'll be why you're so grumpy then. Breakfast - most important meal of the day. I'd look into it....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 23 May, 2010, 10:08:57 PM
Keep us up to date regarding your cereal habits, Roger.  We NEED to know sir. 

Hugs to you and yours (especially... ah, you know).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 24 May, 2010, 06:25:29 PM
I realised that my camera had been nicked at the end of the week. Luckily I had enough money to buy a new one and get a slight upgrade in the process. So only a minor impediment. I missed it on Saturday when I too went to someone's 40th birthday party but I did a few sketches in my pad instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 24 May, 2010, 08:35:21 PM
a double post in one!

mini mog had a major yucky reaction to sun cream and the missus is on her way to chorley a+e with a suspected bust/discolated toe ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 May, 2010, 09:25:00 PM
The water pressure in this house has been reduced somehow.I turn the cold water on upstairs in the shower and it just dribbles and i am pretty certain it wasnt like this before.I havent touched anything myself but i am going to fix this problem by going and adjusting it using the mains in the street.There is a tap in a square hole with a cover outside.That should do the trick hopefully.........

I pay water my rates and i want my water supply back as it should be but i am curious if this has been done by Southern Water who may have decreased the water pressure in the whole area as some kind of costcutting exercise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 May, 2010, 03:37:35 PM
Just tried frying an egg but it wouldn't break. The shell broke but the membrane wouldn't. Felt pretty solid inside and not in a boiled egg kind of way. It couldn't be, could it? That's me put off a late lunch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mike Gloady on 25 May, 2010, 03:53:17 PM
Won't eat eggs for a month now.  Thanks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2010, 03:58:22 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 25 May, 2010, 03:37:35 PM
Just tried frying an egg but it wouldn't break. The shell broke but the membrane wouldn't. Felt pretty solid inside and not in a boiled egg kind of way. It couldn't be, could it? That's me put off a late lunch.

You were too chicken to see what was inside it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 May, 2010, 03:59:10 PM
mmmm - a roast chicken omelette in a shell! What's not to like?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2010, 07:26:52 PM
I am fed up with not getting what i want.

The newly opened off licence along the road was stocking bottles of Dunkertons cider.2 different types.

Of course now they cant get hold of any more of it.

The CO OP across the road started stocking their own cider which was called Tillington Hills Cider.

Of course now every time i go in there to buy more they dont have any in stock.

Its curious because all the shit quality cider is ALWAYS in stock WITHOUT FAIL along with all the other rubbish that is ALWAYS in stock.

I went to Asda along the road to buy a 3 litre box of Westons Organic Still Cider because it was a good deal @ 6.00 quid per box.

Of course now they dont stock it anymore.

Its like a conspiracy but of course its my fault for being discerning instead of liking drinking rubbish like Bulmers and Magners like everyone else.

*

I missed last weeks prog because this weeks was out one day early for some inexplicable reason.

*

Its really hard to find green olives in oil [not in salt water] that are plain instead of either being stuffed with something or other.I just want plain olives .

*

Why are the EU dictating what choices of color of paint i can have mixed to order in a paint shop ?? I cant get the colors i want because of this.

I am sick and tired of these petty Collectivist control freaks so i expect before long they will be telling me what time i have to go to bed and get up in the morning.

Fuckers.

>:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 25 May, 2010, 07:33:37 PM
Last night, at work I put my holiday application in for Hi-Ex! and during my run up the M1 I realised that I had forgot to add the Thursday night ::) but I managed to rectify that when I got back.
Also once I had posted on Gavin's Irish Hell-Trek thread I couldn't get the internet on my phone until I arrived back home  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 May, 2010, 07:54:15 PM
I walked over a cow grill whilst walking in a park and there were some teenagers walking toward me and they walked over it as well so I didn't get the satisfaction that I was somehow more hardcore than them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 29 May, 2010, 10:27:53 AM
won a johnny alpha off ebay but due to several factors only managed to get to the post depot thursday ...but cos it was recorded they send it away after a week ...bollocks! contacted the seller but he was a flippant numpty who didnt put a return address and blamed me for not getting it straight away! excuse me for working and caring for my scabby child...he sent a refund after i started a dispute but though i was being unfair to him as he had offered me several pieces of non twoth related tat as replacements!?
   also had the trolls out on the ebay forum ! :lol:

  i have also had the shits since yesterday... :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 May, 2010, 01:16:04 PM
The problem just resolved itself so i edited the comment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 29 May, 2010, 01:47:42 PM
Just got the collected Wednesday Comics hardback from DC.

Really looking forward to reading it, but boy it's going to be a bugger to fit on the shelf.  :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 May, 2010, 02:29:35 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 29 May, 2010, 10:27:53 AM
but cos it was recorded they send it away after a week ...bollocks!

I would complain to the delivery service, what happens if you are on two weeks holiday  :-*
It seems like a very stupid system, if you ask me and everyone else who happens to be normal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 29 May, 2010, 02:48:38 PM
Hot some paid work- hooray -But it means working all weekend- so there goes the after show party after the gig I'm playing tonight..hotel booked and all

damn you fate
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 29 May, 2010, 09:59:43 PM
It's not my birthday for a whole two hours yet.  :( >:( :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 May, 2010, 10:03:04 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 29 May, 2010, 09:59:43 PM
It's not my birthday for a whole two hours yet.  :( >:( :'(

I'd put it off until the morning if I were you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 31 May, 2010, 04:19:52 PM
Whilst sat on the throne at work this morning, contemplating how much sleep I will get today, the cleaner walked into the toilets and just opened the LOCKED door I was sat behind :-[
She looked mortified and couldn't say sorry enough. I shall be mentioning the absolute crap locking facilities of the male toilets tonight when I see the boss  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 May, 2010, 11:33:39 PM
I was slightly befuddled by the weird stains on some of my cd's, then I remembered that it's prolly projectile vomit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2010, 12:30:22 AM
But did it still play okay? That's the important thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 June, 2010, 12:35:08 AM
They were all in cases, I should have mentioned that. I had half a mind to lick "Revolver" clean but I thought better of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 June, 2010, 01:29:07 AM
The plastic bottle I'm currently using to store water will have to be replaced as it smells too much like cider after I drank cider out of it. It originally housed Vitamin Water, but I can't remember which flavour. Possibly the still lemonade flavour. The best flavour is Triple Berry.

http://www.vitaminwater.co.uk/en_GB/pages/home/home.html

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 01 June, 2010, 11:08:12 AM
our expansion chamber on the wifes car has been leaking so it got very empty and very hot on monday nearly got strnaded in southport ...thanks to the lady at number 79 for the use of her watering can ...managed to procure a part but since its a rover very hard to come by! shes gonna be selling soon!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 June, 2010, 01:25:41 PM
I live near Southport. It is neither south (unless compared to places further north, like Iceland) or a port (unless compared to other places that aren't ports, like Cheltenham). (Actually, one of the first buildings in the area was the "Southport Hotel," after which the town took its name. Or so a weird man in a Macintosh once informed me. Wikipedia disagrees, of course.)

Southport is full of vicious old people who smell funny and who ordered the council to move the sea further out to sea as all that water is untrustworthy and frightening. As a result, the beach is turning into a salt marsh, but there are still lots of sand hills up Ainsdale way where one can canoodle in relative obscurity. The Floral Hall would be a good place to hold a comic convention, but they never do. Bastards.

I should get a job for the Tourist Board...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 01 June, 2010, 02:15:47 PM
I sometimes ride my bike to Southport.
Only very occasionally, though 'cos it's about 30 miles and I'm a lazy sod...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 01 June, 2010, 02:17:00 PM
Still waiting for Red Dead Redemption to be delivered. I'm livid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 01 June, 2010, 05:34:48 PM
It appears that the DSS don't want me to sign off as they've put so many obstacles in my path that it's driving me nuts.

When I found out I got a job last week, I rang them to let them know, especially as they had booked me in for a course on how to find employment which I now didn't need to go to.

I got passed around and eventually given a number to ring to sign off, but when I rang it they said I couldn't sign off until I'd been on this course. The course on how to find a job. Like the one I've now got.

So, I went on their stupid course, wasting most of last Monday afternoon. Then last Wednesday, the employment agency rang to tell me that the date I was due to start has changed. Late Friday afternoon they tell me I now start today. Too late to get to the jobcentreplus, too late to ring them.

I was due to sign on today, which I can't do because I'm now working. Tried to ring the number I was given last week, which no longer works. Didn't get home until gone 5:00pm so no answer when I rang the other office and it appears that I can't email them either.

Now I'm expecting shitty letters from the DSS asking me why I didn't sign on today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 June, 2010, 05:40:10 PM
Dear DSS,

Thank you for your continued concern over my well-being. I have actually found a job, but if you'd like to keep paying me unemployment benefit regardless of this fact, then I'm all too happy to accept. I'm sure my new employer will allow me an afternoon off in order to attend your "How To Find a Job, You Dummy" course if this is a prerequisite for continuing to receive your lovely money on top of my wages.

Yours sincerely,

The Poor Sod You're "Helping."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 June, 2010, 06:48:27 PM
That's bizarre. In the old days people either sent in their signing on books or they got cut off the next time they failed to show. Now people don't have so many jobcentres where they can physically sign on you get all sorts of ridiculousness.

I bet those weren't the rules the numpty who signed you up to the course just wanted you to go so they could hit a target.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2010, 06:53:46 PM
I got signed up to that course - as a matter of routine and with indecent haste, I might add - and by the time it rolled around, you guessed it: I was already in a job and had signed off. Then I got a letter asking me why I had failed to turn up for the course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 June, 2010, 06:55:52 PM
That's the problem with the benefits system and job hunting systems being separate I guess...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 June, 2010, 07:17:42 PM
It's more than likely that the gang of Mexican youths that attacked Paul McCartney's tour bus in Mexico were not in fact wearing oversized sombreros and ponchos.   :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 01 June, 2010, 11:59:02 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 June, 2010, 01:25:41 PM
I live near Southport. It is neither south (unless compared to places further north, like Iceland) or a port (unless compared to other places that aren't ports, like Cheltenham). (Actually, one of the first buildings in the area was the "Southport Hotel," after which the town took its name. Or so a weird man in a Macintosh once informed me. Wikipedia disagrees, of course.)

Southport is full of vicious old people who smell funny and who ordered the council to move the sea further out to sea as all that water is untrustworthy and frightening. As a result, the beach is turning into a salt marsh, but there are still lots of sand hills up Ainsdale way where one can canoodle in relative obscurity. The Floral Hall would be a good place to hold a comic convention, but they never do. Bastards.

I should get a job for the Tourist Board...

that bleedin coastal road is probably the cause of my carsickness since i was a wee boy...old people  including the one's who blocked our car in with shopping trolleys we got the shop to shift em and as we was strapping mini back in a nob head put another in the way and had to sqeeze it past the car nearly scratching it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 02 June, 2010, 12:15:06 AM
OUT OF GAS THISMORNING SO COLD SHOWER!!!!! ITS FRIKEN WINTER HERE FOR F"S SAKE.

CU Radbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 June, 2010, 09:32:39 AM
The staff in Birmingham's Apple Store are a minor impediment as they're all too busy being cool and showing off the shiny hardware to actually serve you. Being a cool place means there's no counter, so you have to stand around like a lemon for 20 minutes hoping to catch someone's eye.

When you do that, you have to endure the process of trying to be sold extended warranties (at these prices, they really shouldn't break down), unnecessary add-ons and one-to-one workshops - even when you have made it abundantly clear that you are not interested.

It might be funky but this is surely no way to treat someone intending to make a four-figure purchase. Just serve me already!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 02 June, 2010, 10:45:51 AM
As a rule, I never buy extended warranties but I make the exception for Apple computers. I had a Mac which was playing up (which I still maintain is pretty rare). It had to go in for repairs twice, once under guarantee and then under AppleCare extended warranty. Saved me a hell of a lot of money. In fact I had a call from AppleCare to say that I was entitled to a completely free new computer but I didn't get a chance to take them up on their offer as I was too busy. Really regret that now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 June, 2010, 12:50:39 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 01 June, 2010, 11:59:02 PM
that bleedin coastal road is probably the cause of my carsickness since i was a wee boy...old people  including the one's who blocked our car in with shopping trolleys we got the shop to shift em and as we was strapping mini back in a nob head put another in the way and had to sqeeze it past the car nearly scratching it!

Ah, the bumpy Coast Road! It was constructed on top of a rubbish tip, you know. That's why it's so lovely and undulating today - especially if you hit it at speed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 June, 2010, 04:12:26 PM
Quote from: Banners on 02 June, 2010, 09:32:39 AM
The staff in Birmingham's Apple Store are a minor impediment as they're all too busy being cool and showing off the shiny hardware to actually serve you. Being a cool place means there's no counter, so you have to stand around like a lemon for 20 minutes hoping to catch someone's eye.

When my i-pod broke, I had to make an appointmemnt with an "Apple Genius", who turned out to be a spotty youth whose only advice was to reset it it and reload everything. Thanks Genius-boy, I could have worked that out myself!

As for Southport, I spent many holidays as a kid on the caravan site across the road from the sand dunes, which were an amazing place to play. I learmned to drive on Southport beach, sitting on my dad's knee while he did the pedals. It's a crying shame that the Pleasure Beach is virtually closed down now - the near-vertical slide in the fun house was ace!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 02 June, 2010, 06:31:35 PM
Two hours and nobody's asked if Dandontdare had tried using cheese on his iPod?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 02 June, 2010, 08:22:07 PM
Today I bought a flapjack, one I'd tried months before. I was disgusted to find they'd changed the consistency. Repulsive.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 02 June, 2010, 08:41:08 PM
Quote from: nev on 02 June, 2010, 08:22:07 PM
Today I bought a flapjack, one I'd tried months before. I was disgusted to find they'd changed the consistency. Repulsive.
It's probably not a deliberate change, so much as natural decomposition.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 03 June, 2010, 01:37:00 PM
Faxes. In this day and age - what is the point? Why do people insist I use them?

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 June, 2010, 02:12:07 PM
I guess that emails can get lost in the crowd or drowned in spam. Maybe it's also marginally quicker to receive a fax rather than open an email, read it and then print it out. A fax gives an instant hard copy for filing (you know how office people love their filing). There's also the type of boss who bought that fax machine for half a million quid when they first came out and is determined to get value for money out of it. Then again, some folk are just awkward.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 June, 2010, 02:16:45 PM
Quote from: Banners on 03 June, 2010, 01:37:00 PM
Faxes. In this day and age - what is the point? Why do people insist I use them?

I remember when studying we were taken to see a design studio and were shown a fax machine. We had never even heard of such a thing. The idea that you could put an image through this thing and it would appear down the other end of a phone line seemed incredible. (Shows his age again.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 June, 2010, 02:35:37 PM
i was once asked to help a junior colleague who was having trouble sending a fax. I asked her what she'd been doing so far:
"Well I put the document face down here"
"yes, that's right"
"Then I dial 9 plus the number"
"fine so far"
"I press start.... and look, it just comes straight out the bottom again!"

God knows where she thought it would go, but she'd sent the same fax about half a dozen times by then! I also heard of someone who conned the office junior into calling another branch and asking them to fax over a couple of dozen blank sheets of paper as they'd run out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 03 June, 2010, 03:00:33 PM
Turns out I wasn't meant to be in school today. At least I got 5 hours of study done in the library.

On the plus side my birthday present from my father arrived today, but the spine of Sinister Dexter: Eurocrash is not the same as the others in the series. What the fuck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 03 June, 2010, 03:07:16 PM
Quote from: nev on 02 June, 2010, 08:22:07 PM
Today I bought a flapjack, one I'd tried months before. I was disgusted to find they'd changed the consistency. Repulsive.
Have you tried using cheese on it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 June, 2010, 03:24:31 PM
Flapjacks are always disgusting unless you make your own or you buy them somewhere they are baked on the premises. It's nice to have some control over the fat and humectant content.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 June, 2010, 03:47:24 PM
Three were arses when I left the network today. They tried to bribe me with vouchers for "comics".

"HOW DID YOU KNOW I BUY COMICS?!" I yelled much later at facsimile of the network made out of potatoes

...how did they know?

It's all very sinister.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kev Levell on 03 June, 2010, 03:50:21 PM
drawing is impossible with the hiccups!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 June, 2010, 04:17:48 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 03 June, 2010, 03:24:31 PM
It's nice to have some control over the fat and humectant content.

And once again 2000adonline has expanded my vocabulary!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 03 June, 2010, 04:27:44 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 03 June, 2010, 04:17:48 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 03 June, 2010, 03:24:31 PM
It's nice to have some control over the fat and humectant content.

And once again 2000adonline has expanded my vocabulary!
Every day is a school day with HoU :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 03 June, 2010, 06:45:07 PM
In relation to my earlier post. Here's a thumbnail to the Graphic Novels in question.

(http://i.imagehost.org/t/0184/DSC_0471.jpg) (http://i.imagehost.org/view/0184/DSC_0471)
What the hell is this? Why would you even make them with different spines? It looks wrong now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 June, 2010, 08:17:16 PM
Quote from: James Stacey on 03 June, 2010, 04:27:44 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 03 June, 2010, 04:17:48 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 03 June, 2010, 03:24:31 PM
It's nice to have some control over the fat and humectant content.

And once again 2000adonline has expanded my vocabulary!
Every day is a school day with HoU :)

Hey, you've got to start reading the ingredients and nutritional information, or how else are you going to make informed choices?
;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 June, 2010, 01:00:58 AM
That film where Jessica Alba gets her face smashed in for like, 10 minutes, ain't on in no nearby picturehouse. Not even in Northampton. :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 June, 2010, 01:02:57 PM
Some time ago, I got my first ever short story published after winning a top place at www.youwriteon.com (http://www.youwriteon.com) in their first anthology, which you can see on Amazon here: http://tinyurl.com/2wgxosz (http://tinyurl.com/2wgxosz)

Last year, the book didn't sell enough to net me my £25 royalty cheque. This morning, I got my latest royalty statement:

(http://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p147/the_legendary_shark/2000ADonline%20Images/royalties_report.jpg)

Looks like it's gonna' take me a while to catch up to J.K. Rowling. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 June, 2010, 04:21:32 PM
Had two cards from the postman (or woman) but I know mine is always a bloke.
I know one is for my commission from Bolt-01 (I shall start a thread when it arrives but some of you may have seen the nearly finished pic on my facebook page) but the other I have no idea.
Now shall I collect them just before 19:00 or wait until I finish work in the morning, decisions, decisions :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 07 June, 2010, 06:28:07 PM
My pet rabbits like to eat primulas, pinks, hebe, strawberry leaves, lillies, irises and miniature roses, but they're a bit fussy about grass. They'll only eat it around the edge of the lawn from sitting on the patio, if it's cut with garden sheers, or it has seeded itself into a planter, which presumably makes it more tempting. When I laid some turf over a small area for their benefit I didn't imagine I'd ever have to cut the grass. For every strawberry leaf they eat, they bite another off at the stem and just let it fall. I think they could destroy the lot in 50 to 100 days. There's a chance more than half the strawberries may get to grow, however, and in any case I've not been able to keep up with eating the crop as it's ripened in recent years so most of it got turned into jam.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 June, 2010, 07:30:28 PM
Well I didn't go to the collection office, so it's 07:00 tomorrow then  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 June, 2010, 10:47:14 PM
So I'm on batch support tonight, meant to be watching a load of jobs pay Tax Relief at Source to the good people of Ireland.  After about twenty minutes I realise it's a public holiday in Ireland and the batch isn't running tonight.

I wouldn't mind but I did the same stupid thing last month (except it was a Bank Holiday earlier in the week meant I had the days wrong).

Oh well, at least I was on fire in goals at footy tonight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 08 June, 2010, 10:21:50 AM
I'm selling my house. The only offer we have had so far was 25K under the asking price. I pointed and laughed. The estate agent pointed and laughed. Now the prospective buyer has upped their offer by 3K. WTF. Why waste everyone's time. I admired their nerve first time. Now I want to poke them in the eye for taking the piss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 June, 2010, 12:14:11 PM
A bank that doesn't charge interest on a mortgage? Impossible, right? Wrong:  http://tinyurl.com/37z94gb
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 June, 2010, 10:24:41 PM
I didn't get the little fish shaped bottle of soy sauce with my sushi tray at lunch time and I had parked too far from M&S to be bothered to take it back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 June, 2010, 10:38:07 PM
some idiot journo on Newsnight, discussing the Star Chamber, just described the 17th century as "in ancient times"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 09 June, 2010, 12:04:20 AM
One of my neighbours cars is currently being repossessed. The flashing lights on the top of the tow truck is doing my head in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 June, 2010, 12:06:57 AM
Are these the bad neighbours? You could try a last minute long range key-ing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 June, 2010, 12:35:52 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 08 June, 2010, 10:38:07 PM
some idiot journo on Newsnight, discussing the Star Chamber, just described the 17th century as "in ancient times"

Maybe he meant the 17th C BC (or 'BCE' if you're a pain in my proverbial)?   Middle Helladic III, 2nd Intermediate Period, Middle Minoan II, Proto-Palatial Period, Troy VI, or just the plain later Early Bronze Age where I come from, that sort of thing?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 June, 2010, 01:17:50 AM
Chris Brown was denied a UK visa. How can they do this to the greatest artist of our age?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 09 June, 2010, 10:11:02 AM
The roller wheel on the middle of my mouse has packed up. Now it rolls and sod all happens. Think you can cope without it? Try and navigate a long news web page or use PhotoShop without it...

Ah, welcome back to the real world...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: wild-seven on 09 June, 2010, 07:36:31 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 09 June, 2010, 01:17:50 AM
Chris Brown was denied a UK visa. How can they do this to the greatest artist of our age?

Because he's a steaming great misogynist see-you-next-tuesday. Who can't carry a tune in a bucket
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 June, 2010, 12:27:27 AM
I am playing 007 Nightfire PS2 game but its pissing me off because of the lack of checkpoints that are saved within a mission which means when i die in the final part of the mission because its the first time playing it and despite there being a cut scene i have to start right at the beginning of that stage of the mission ALL OVER AGAIN !! >:( which just wastes loads of my time and its tedious and boring and it also means that i cant save my progress and finish it at a later date where i left off.

IDIOT Game designers.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 10 June, 2010, 11:55:26 PM
My toilet is haunted. Poltergeist-ed. Pooh-sessed.
All of a sudden, at about 7pm today, it started flushing by itself. And it keeps doing it, every ten minutes. Flush flush flush. There's a phantom with a bad bladder infesting my bathroom and its getting annoying.
Okay, so its not really haunted, its obviously something to do with the seal on the flushing mechanism which means that once the ballcock is up (ooooh maaaaatron!) it doesn't stop filling, or something... But the haunted idea is cooler so lets go with that.
Its pissing annoying me now, flush, flush, flush. Its going to go on like this all night. Have to take time off work now tomorrow to get it sorted... Or not... Well, you could get used to it I suppose. And it MIGHT come in handy. One more step towards ultra laziness.... and you'd never have to worry about forgetting to flush and leaving a floater ever again.....
Must look into it.
The idea, not the toilet.
Oh, there it goes again, Fluuuusshhhhaaaaahhhhhh!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 June, 2010, 12:10:06 AM
Flush it again or wait until it has flushed itself and then wedge something under the ballcock mechanism to stop it filling up with water so it cant flush itself anymore or failing that turn the water off.

Take the lid of the cistern off and look inside it and watch what happens and see it for yourself what the problem is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2010, 12:31:15 AM
I've gone right off that Charlie Brooker.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 11 June, 2010, 01:02:27 AM
There are English flags all over my internet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2010, 04:06:13 AM
My left armpit is itching, but I don't want to start scratching as it is prone to weeping.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 11 June, 2010, 10:18:18 AM
Ah go on Rog, give it a scratch, ya know ya want to.
Ghost toilet is now fixed. Flusher arm was busted. Kind of miss it now though. :(
Cool thing is I now know how to sabotage toilets so they flush themselves. Mua-ha-ha-ha... that will come in handy for some pranking at some point in the future, I'm sure of it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 June, 2010, 10:35:51 AM
Callers who when you do 1471 it says "Caller withheld their number" and 0845 numbers.If these callers dont want to leave a message or disclose their number they can all just fuck off and if they dont want to leave a message then their reason for calling cant be that important or necessary.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 11 June, 2010, 01:57:08 PM
That's probably those automatic diallers for sales or banks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 June, 2010, 02:18:05 PM
Join the Telephone Preference Service - it really cuts down the number of junk calls, and if you mention it to any cold callers that do get through, they usually apologise and get off the line pretty sharpish.

I seem to have been plagued by one of my personal per hates today - people who stop halfway through a door to finish a conversation - either go through, or come back in, but GET OUT OF THE SODDING DOORWAY!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 11 June, 2010, 03:08:43 PM
This thread is turning into a bob Dylan song...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 11 June, 2010, 03:23:28 PM
Ordered a Wacom Bamboo from PLAY.COM. on 2nd of June. 3-5 days of delivery has passed. Have to wait 21 more days 7 days after supposed arrival.

Has anyone ordered from PLAY.COM and do they use their own private service or regular posties?


As its free delivery I considered they use their own cargo haulage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 June, 2010, 05:11:35 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 11 June, 2010, 02:18:05 PM
I seem to have been plagued by one of my personal per hates today - people who stop halfway through a door to finish a conversation - either go through, or come back in, but GET OUT OF THE SODDING DOORWAY!

I get peeved by those people who insist upon going in the shop or getting on the bus before the people already inside have managed to get out. Quite simply, the more people you let out before you go in, the more space there will be inside once you get through the door.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 11 June, 2010, 05:25:44 PM
Quote from: Van Dom on 11 June, 2010, 10:18:18 AM
Ah go on Rog, give it a scratch, ya know ya want to.
Ghost toilet is now fixed. Flusher arm was busted. Kind of miss it now though. :(
Cool thing is I now know how to sabotage toilets so they flush themselves. Mua-ha-ha-ha... that will come in handy for some pranking at some point in the future, I'm sure of it!

ooh haunted bogs! a few weeks ago mine started well,puking for want of a better word so when i flushed it the sink started puking then the bath despite seventeen,yes i counted buckets of water at 4 o clock in the morn !  eventually sorted it by filling the bath and sink then as i was flushing the loo while pouring eighteenth bucket down i pulled the plugs on the sink and bath simples!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 11 June, 2010, 05:31:18 PM
Bloody hell, illustrator is the biggest pain in the arse program I've ever encountered- something that took me 10 minutes to draw in flash is taking 2 days to sort out in illustrator-nothing does what it's supposed too >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 June, 2010, 05:39:19 PM
This year I was asked at work to draw a flow chart in MS Word, comprising 48 separate items, three boxes wide. Quite a laborious business when you have to insert a new step right in the middle, which means moving everything else down the page by an inch and having to adjust arrows with two right angles in them. I gather there was another tool available for the purpose (i.e. Visio), but I was told just see how you get on with Word for now...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 11 June, 2010, 05:50:45 PM
When I used to live in Amsterdam I heard a neighbour's loo flush and a turd actually reversed into my bog. (Or perhaps it teleported in from another dimension). It was a terrible sign of things to come, like scary goings on, early in a horror film. One morning I walked into the bathroom to find the floor was wet. Overnight, sewage had come up through the bog and bath and then gone back down. The bath was stained 3/4 of the way up and sewage was all over the floor up to the level of the door threshold. Had to scoop it all up with a dustpan.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 11 June, 2010, 07:01:40 PM
Quote from: Krombasher on 11 June, 2010, 03:23:28 PM
Ordered a Wacom Bamboo from PLAY.COM. on 2nd of June. 3-5 days of delivery has passed. Have to wait 21 more days 7 days after supposed arrival.

Has anyone ordered from PLAY.COM and do they use their own private service or regular posties?


As its free delivery I considered they use their own cargo haulage.

I once had a DVD turn up four years after I ordered it from Play.com. I'd already picked it up from Asda in the intervening years, and lent it to a friend, never to be seen again. At least I got a replacement out of it. Couldn't be bothered going through my old statements to see if they'd ever taken the payment for it (it was only about a fiver).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2010, 10:44:16 PM
Michael Fassbender gets to choose between being The Lizard or Magneto and I don't.


And why the fuck is Mortal Kombat still around?


Fuck you, Michael Fassbender.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 June, 2010, 12:32:17 PM
Lost my wedding ring.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 June, 2010, 12:41:33 PM
That's a great pity. I hope it turns up again soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 14 June, 2010, 01:04:31 PM
Oh no, not the Wedding Ring... Does Mrs Tiplodocus know ??
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 June, 2010, 01:10:59 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 14 June, 2010, 12:32:17 PM
Lost my wedding ring.

Aaargh, what a nightmare!  I've just recently been persuaded by gory stories to take mine off while sailing, and now spend half my time on the water convinced I've lost it.  Like the man says, it's a strange fate that we should suffer so much fear and doubt over so small a thing.

Hope it ends well for you, Tips. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 June, 2010, 01:15:57 PM
Oh yes; Mrs Tips was there when I noticed it missing on the ferry over to Belfast.  We had a good long search - convinced it had just fallen off because I twiddle it quite a lot and was sure I'd have noticed it missing earlier.

I NEVER take it off so it must have just fallen off un-noticed.

It's not turned up (or back in the house or car) so I'm guessing it's a write off.

Still, it wasn't expensive so a minor impediment until I get a new one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 June, 2010, 01:16:48 PM
Why not get the pair of them framed on a plush velvet mounting and hang them somewhere prominent in your home? That way you could be sure of never losing them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 June, 2010, 01:24:39 PM
Why not have a wedding ring tattooed on your finger? Sorry, that was a bit flippant. I hope it turns up again soon and that it won't be one of those incidents that's good for kicking arguments off.

I lost my wedding ring on purpose by hurling it into the Thames. This was a by-product of me being married to a rancorous old sow with all the humour of a 'plane crash and all the inner beauty of a ninety year old abandoned oil rig.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 June, 2010, 02:12:50 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 June, 2010, 01:24:39 PM
I lost my wedding ring on purpose by hurling it into the Thames. This was a by-product of me being married to a rancorous old sow with all the humour of a 'plane crash and all the inner beauty of a ninety year old abandoned oil rig.

Ah TLS, you're at your very best when channelling Les Dawson!  :lol:

What I find so perplexing about my own attachment to my wedding ring (a plain hoop of metal) is that I've only had it 2 years but I've been with the relevant lady on and off for 21 years and set very little store by the institution of marriage itself.  Possessed by possessions.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 15 June, 2010, 04:21:53 PM
Just got the Corporation Tax bill. Bugger.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 15 June, 2010, 04:59:55 PM
Just reading those words made me shudder....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 June, 2010, 06:47:58 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 10 June, 2010, 12:27:27 AM
I am playing 007 Nightfire PS2 game but its pissing me off because of the lack of checkpoints that are saved within a mission which means when i die in the final part of the mission because its the first time playing it and despite there being a cut scene i have to start right at the beginning of that stage of the mission ALL OVER AGAIN !! >:( which just wastes loads of my time and its tedious and boring and it also means that i cant save my progress and finish it at a later date where i left off.

IDIOT Game designers.



I just folded and snapped the disc into quarters after going up to 4 on it  >:(

Without a shadow of a doubt that was the most annoying crap i have ever played and i just ran out of patience and besides i shouldnt have even been playing it as i have a competition entry to finish.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 June, 2010, 08:08:43 PM
Quote from: Banners on 15 June, 2010, 04:21:53 PM
Just got the Corporation Tax bill. Bugger.

M@

Ahhh the memories of Monopoly as a kid.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 15 June, 2010, 09:49:07 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 June, 2010, 06:47:58 PM

I just folded and snapped the disc into quarters after going up to 4 on it  >:(

Without a shadow of a doubt that was the most annoying crap i have ever played and i just ran out of patience and besides i shouldnt have even been playing it as i have a competition entry to finish.
Yes, it's shit. You have done the world a favour
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 June, 2010, 10:23:06 PM
Full Metal Alchemist is finished. Guess I'd better run a bath whilst I pop out for some  vodka and razorblades...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 June, 2010, 10:56:49 PM
Quote from: James Stacey on 15 June, 2010, 09:49:07 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 June, 2010, 06:47:58 PM

I just folded and snapped the disc into quarters after going up to 4 on it  >:(

Without a shadow of a doubt that was the most annoying crap i have ever played and i just ran out of patience and besides i shouldnt have even been playing it as i have a competition entry to finish.
Yes, it's shit. You have done the world a favour

So it wasnt just me then ?

Thats reassuring to know !

*

Right now i feel highly irritable and i feel like giving someone a face full of 4  >:( and i am finding it very difficult to concentrate on what i should be doing to the point that i havent done anything yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 16 June, 2010, 12:23:58 AM
Quote from: Noisybast on 11 June, 2010, 07:01:40 PM
Quote from: Krombasher on 11 June, 2010, 03:23:28 PM
Ordered a Wacom Bamboo from PLAY.COM. on 2nd of June. 3-5 days of delivery has passed. Have to wait 21 more days 7 days after supposed arrival.

Has anyone ordered from PLAY.COM and do they use their own private service or regular posties?


As its free delivery I considered they use their own cargo haulage.

I once had a DVD turn up four years after I ordered it from Play.com. I'd already picked it up from Asda in the intervening years, and lent it to a friend, never to be seen again. At least I got a replacement out of it. Couldn't be bothered going through my old statements to see if they'd ever taken the payment for it (it was only about a fiver).

Not so much four years but they had me going for a week there. So much more grateful to see it arrive this morning. A working balance is restored.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 June, 2010, 11:55:31 AM
I'm getting hacked off with the amount of padding and repetition in Marvel TPBs. I don't follow individual titles, but Marvel have always been pretty good at quickly (unlike DC) collecting the major events into sequential trades. I didn't used to mind half a dozen pages of covers and sketches at the end but things are getting silly.

I already had Dark Avengers vol 1, but this week a couple more arrived: Dark Reign - Accept Change and Siege-prelude. The first one reprints Dark Avengers issue 1 (though anyone who buys this volume will probably already have this in DA v.1 as I did), but it then takes the piss with no less than 112 pages of text features, creator interviews and character profiles. The Siege - Prelude isn't quite so bad, but fills things out with 67 pages of Green Goblin reprints and, you guessed it, Dark Avengers issue 1 yet again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 16 June, 2010, 03:11:19 PM
I have about 4 mouth ulcers all sat right next to each other in my left (mouth) cheek. It is ruddy painful and I can't eat properly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 16 June, 2010, 08:03:39 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 16 June, 2010, 03:11:19 PM
I have about 4 mouth ulcers all sat right next to each other in my left (mouth) cheek. It is ruddy painful and I can't eat properly.
I used to get mouth ulcers quite a lot but since using Sainsbury's own mouth wash on a daily basis I haven't had one develop fully for about five years now.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 June, 2010, 08:52:35 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 16 June, 2010, 08:03:39 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 16 June, 2010, 03:11:19 PM
I have about 4 mouth ulcers all sat right next to each other in my left (mouth) cheek. It is ruddy painful and I can't eat properly.
I used to get mouth ulcers quite a lot but since using Sainsbury's own mouth wash on a daily basis I haven't had one develop fully for about five years now.





V

Bloody hate them- I get them when I'm run down and it is very annoying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 16 June, 2010, 08:56:16 PM
I grew far too much lettuce, and have just had to spend two and a half back-breaking hours carefully digging it up and replanting it to give it room to grow properly.  Man, I'm tired.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 16 June, 2010, 11:11:03 PM
QuoteI grew far too much lettuce...

QuoteI have about 4 mouth ulcers...

Only here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 16 June, 2010, 11:15:47 PM
Today I saw some obnoxious little brat screaming "GET SOME MONEY" at his mother when she said she didn't have any to buy him sweets.

Why was it illegal for me to walk over and kick him in the head?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 June, 2010, 07:40:33 PM
Now that the Minty shooting dates are finalised and I've booked time off from work, I decided to tell my lovely wife about the dates. She then reminded me that the Wales shoot was at the same time we were going to her aunties 80th Bithday meal with many other family members  ::)

At times like this the lure of the family can be strong but I had to inform her that the lure of Judge Minty is stronger. Lets just say the temperature in the house has dropped, which is good as it's bloody hot down in Kent  :lol:

I suppose I'll have to make it up to her in the very near future.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 June, 2010, 07:54:02 PM
Interfering with a justice dept operation - five years creep!

(this may work, but I'd try flowers and a nice meal out first)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 June, 2010, 07:56:28 PM
I know she wants to go to one of those posh eating establishments in London (La Gavroche to be exact) so it's gonna hurt my wallet  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 17 June, 2010, 08:02:10 PM
I had a haircut.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 June, 2010, 08:05:50 PM
A number 1 all over I hope  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 17 June, 2010, 08:12:14 PM
It's pretty damn short. And it probably cost as much as the fancy meal you mentioned.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 June, 2010, 08:33:36 PM
I pay about £6 for my haircut at a barbers, I bet you go to a salon  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 17 June, 2010, 08:46:58 PM
Pfft! Barbers and salons are for poseurs - I use a razor for mine.

My impediment today is my laptop is slow as the four penny post - it took 15 mins to fully start up!

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 17 June, 2010, 08:55:15 PM
Pah! Razors! I just wait until my neighbour is cutting his hedge, then conceal myself in the privet. Quick, cheap, and an adrenaline-fuelled thrill-ride into the bargain!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 17 June, 2010, 08:57:00 PM
 How do you cut your hair though?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 17 June, 2010, 09:07:13 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 June, 2010, 08:33:36 PM
I pay about £6 for my haircut at a barbers, I bet you go to a salon  ;)
I paid a fiver.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 June, 2010, 09:14:58 PM
I cut my own hair as well which is hardly ever since it grows very slowly and no one else ever touches my hair with anything that cuts less'n they wants a face fulla 4.

I have a slight phobia or aversion to hairdressing salons and especially Barbers shops.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 17 June, 2010, 09:21:54 PM
Bought the missus a Spongebob dressing gown yesterday to find that it hasn't got the belt >:(






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 17 June, 2010, 09:53:30 PM
Quote from: nev on 17 June, 2010, 08:02:10 PM
I had a haircut.

which one?

i for one am growing mine after many crap haircuts...its at the messy awkward stage sort of an eighties afro combo. plenty of gel!! :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 17 June, 2010, 09:55:48 PM
Hair Number 407, slightly left of the fringe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 17 June, 2010, 09:57:31 PM
Quote from: nev on 17 June, 2010, 09:55:48 PM
Hair Number 407, slightly left of the fringe.

lord of the fringe :D ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 June, 2010, 01:18:21 PM
Not made it to the comic shop for two weeks.

Next chance I'll have is next wednesday. 

That means possible Thrill Power Overload as I pick up 3 progs, a Meg, the end of Battlefields: The Firefly and Her majesty, the next Grant Morrison Batman and Robin and the next Return of Bruce Wayne.

On the plus side: some great reading ahead.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 June, 2010, 11:03:33 PM
I left a bottle of cider in the freezer to chill it and then forgot about it and now its frozen solid and i want to drink it right now.

Its fair to say also that i am not particularly enjoying life right now for many different reasons.



Also i havent got the go ahead yet on any of the outside work that i have priced up for and booked up and the clock is ticking and before they know it will be Autumn and the weather will deteriorate because they spend too long procastrinating not to mention all the absentee Buy to let landlords that own flats that they rent out have to be contacted and on and on and on it goes....

Its all a fucking complete drag.

.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 18 June, 2010, 11:07:36 PM
Microwave it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 18 June, 2010, 11:18:21 PM
two days ago I was thrilled to see my favourite eBay shop where I get my music from had got in 2 sound tracks I really wanted for a fraction of the cost any where else's was selling them so I bort them but when they arrived in the post today the CD's were fine the cases on the other hand did not survive the postal's services how should we say gentle touch so after mane hours of searching I finally found 2 CD cases that came as closes to the original cases as possible then I had to go thro the fiddley part of prising them open to swap the sheets over now that that is done with  I feal so much better. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 June, 2010, 01:09:41 AM
Quote from: Garageman on 18 June, 2010, 11:07:36 PM
Microwave it.

That's a terrible waste of a perfectly good bludgeoning tool.


All of the people I would want to bludgeon with frozen cider on this board live on the Emerald Isle, though.  :| :| :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 19 June, 2010, 01:20:37 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 June, 2010, 01:09:41 AM
That's a terrible waste of a perfectly good bludgeoning tool.


All of the people I would want to bludgeon with frozen cider on this board live on the Emerald Isle, though.  :| :| :(



Frozen cider Vs frozen stout, no contest. A hard shaft of black wins everytime.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 June, 2010, 01:30:36 AM
Quote from: Garageman on 19 June, 2010, 01:20:37 AM
A hard shaft of black wins everytime.

(http://i531.photobucket.com/albums/dd359/anaconda888/sahft.jpg)

You better believe it, baby!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 19 June, 2010, 01:37:23 AM
Exactamundo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 19 June, 2010, 01:39:48 AM
Freezing liquid in a bottle doesn't make it any heavier than it is in its unfrozen state, you know.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 19 June, 2010, 01:45:26 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 19 June, 2010, 01:39:48 AM
Freezing liquid in a bottle doesn't make it any heavier than it is in its unfrozen state, you know.


No one said it did. It's cold & sore, that's enough.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 June, 2010, 08:00:04 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 19 June, 2010, 01:39:48 AM
Freezing liquid in a bottle doesn't make it any heavier than it is in its unfrozen state, you know.

Reduces its density, in fact.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 June, 2010, 02:33:59 PM
Quote from: Garageman on 18 June, 2010, 11:07:36 PM
Microwave it.

I dont have a microwave and i am not sure exactly what would happen if i tried doing that either plus the bottle top is metallic which doesnt go well with microwaves.I tried it once with a knife in a microwave and it creates blue sparks a bit like lightning.

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 June, 2010, 01:09:41 AM
Quote from: Garageman on 18 June, 2010, 11:07:36 PM
Microwave it.

That's a terrible waste of a perfectly good bludgeoning tool.


All of the people I would want to bludgeon with frozen cider on this board live on the Emerald Isle, though.  :| :| :(

I dont need a bludgeoning tool as i am my own bludgeoning tool.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 June, 2010, 07:51:56 PM
I just put some Sony batteries into my camera, as I am taking pics for the blog and they only lasted 6 pics each, what a con.
I have now put in some Duracell, at least they will last a wee bit longer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 19 June, 2010, 08:39:53 PM
It's worth buying the heavy duty rechargeables as they seem to last much longer than normal batteries.

Have been looking for the right pair of shoes for a 20s fancy dress. Have failed so far. pfffff

On the other hand whilst searching the charity shops of Watford I picked up a book about vikings and a belt with the 60s batman logo on so the cosmic balance is restored.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 19 June, 2010, 09:34:07 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 June, 2010, 07:51:56 PM
I just put some Sony batteries into my camera, as I am taking pics for the blog and they only lasted 6 pics each, what a con.
I have now put in some Duracell, at least they will last a wee bit longer.
I've never looked back since I got my rechargeable Energizer batteries.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 June, 2010, 09:51:59 PM
Dad wants me to spend more than £400 on a new telly for the living room and I get the three year old one in return.

He can naff off.

And ice can be sharpened.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 June, 2010, 09:56:20 PM
My telly in the front room is on it's fourth world cup.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 June, 2010, 09:57:07 PM
my neice bought her mum and dad a nice 42 inch hd ready plasma singing dancing with coffee facilities telly one christmas then took it with her when she moved out !!! the astounding thing is they let her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 19 June, 2010, 10:45:26 PM
My wife has no concept of tidiness. I'm not exactly anal about it myself but even I know that window sills are for ornaments not long term storage and that tidying something up doesn't mean stuffing it in a carrier bag and leaving it in a corner for six months.

The second worst thing she seems to leave everywhere around the house (the worst being coat hangers) are her many pairs of shoes, how the hell she can wear so many different items of footwear in a single day is beyond me. The weird thing is that I recently bought her a shoe rack and placed all of her shoes on it, I also go around picking them up and returning them to the shoe rack almost every night. When I get home from work I find the shoes all over the house again so she is either taking them off and then walking barefoot to the rack to get another pair or she is doing it on fucking purpose to wind me up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 June, 2010, 12:04:16 AM
The telly I have in my room is on its fifth world cup.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 June, 2010, 11:52:41 PM
A FACTORY OF SABBATHS

James works. His colleague does not. At 6:15 he leaves.

The 8A says CMK via Caldecotte. It goes all around Caldecotte back to Kingston. And then CMK. This cannot serve any other purpose than to ridicule the plebian Redline patrons, with the hills. With the lake. With the houses that are quite nice for obviously being mass production. James wonders about inverted ghettoisation, but cannot hope to escape the trauma of being ejected from this bourgeois enclave.

The driver's child is given free reign over the bus. Why is he allowed to climb around on a moving bus. When James alights he must step over the driver's child. He really has to step over the driver's child.

James is listening to Troutmaskreplica. Wistfulness starts as he thinks about how nice it might be to have petemaskreplica on the boards.

James gets leg cramp after rest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 21 June, 2010, 12:22:27 AM
BEAT IS DEAD.


DADDIO.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 21 June, 2010, 12:23:28 AM
I am trying to upload my competition entry onto ImageShack but it is blocking me from browsing through the photobooth application.Instead of opening up the application so i can browse through it and then choose the picture to upload it uploads the tag for the application into the field instead of the photo/file.

Then it says "please choose one of the supported file types"

What do you think i want to do you defective piece of crap ???!!!

>:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 21 June, 2010, 06:14:58 PM
"Hey ma, do you want to see my change jar?"
"Of course I don't, I'm getting ready for work."




Don't lie to me, girl.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 June, 2010, 09:51:07 PM
Hayfever  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 21 June, 2010, 11:03:18 PM
Where is the corkscrew?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 22 June, 2010, 07:47:36 PM
I'm fairly sure I'm dying. Or it's just hayfever combined with my lactose intolerance which both strike yearly.

Hopefully it's the former.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 June, 2010, 07:56:29 PM
We are all dying nev, welcome to the club  :wave:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 22 June, 2010, 08:41:39 PM
HOORAY FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO SLEEP PROPERLY DUE TO LOSS OF BREATH DURING THE NIGHT  :D

Also my bin is filled to the brim in mucus covered tissues. And I have to resort to cheap tissues which feel like what I assume hell to feel like.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 June, 2010, 09:46:55 PM
So I go to the Co-Op and Alanis is on. Now it might just be the heatstroke talking but I ain't frontin' on Morrisette tonight. She'd already won me over and just as I was about to go head over feet the intercom interrupts and "Jamie" usurps. In discontinued continuity elsewhen, said cashier asks "Do you have a Co-op card?" [No.] "_____ ___ ____ ___?" Alanis is replaced by Robyn, who sadly keeps Dancing on Her Own. I'm right here, Robyn. Luckily I evade that godawful UK Hip-Hop Allstars auralculus with P Diddy on it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 June, 2010, 10:29:15 PM
Photoshop CS5 won't install. Bugger.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 23 June, 2010, 07:33:40 AM
Tony's name is actually Roy.
He could have said something, any point in the last six years would have done.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2010, 11:32:52 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 June, 2010, 09:51:07 PM
Hayfever  :(

I am not sure how old you are but there is a chance you will grow out of it.I started getting Hayfever when i was about 13 and now i am 42 the last 3 years have been free of Hayfever or virtually free of it.

I always used to get mine around this time of year and for years it would always start around the second week in June.I sneezed a few times the other day but that was it.

Try Beconase nasal spray.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 23 June, 2010, 12:09:21 PM
My crappy laptop is playing up again so I'm relegated to an hour a day on the library machines for ther next few days. Again. Twice in a frigging month.

So  now I still can't watch Rennaisance. It's sitting there on my computer, taunting me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 June, 2010, 12:55:56 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2010, 11:32:52 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 June, 2010, 09:51:07 PM
Hayfever  :(

I am not sure how old you are but there is a chance you will grow out of it.

Hayfever does come and go. I had it quite badly from the last days of primary school up to my A-level exams, and a couple of times I found it quite debilitating at university, like one afternoon when I drove into town and got a faceful of pollen that wasn't in the air where I was living. For years after that it was quite mild, although my cat allergy got worse. I moved to a new town when I was 30, and the unfamiliar pollen there brought on the sneezing, nose-running and itchy eyes straight away even though I had been fine when I set off from home that morning. After I'd been living there a while my hayfever subsided. Nowadays I just get a few sneezes now and then and a bit of a runny nose sometimes if I've been outside for a while. I think the severity of symptoms lessens as you get older, and staying in one place allows you to become a little bit tolerant of pollen in your locality.

I find Beconase quite helpful too. Best to start taking it in the Spring before symptoms occur. I gather it's too late once you've started sneezing and wheezing come June.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 23 June, 2010, 06:18:08 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2010, 11:32:52 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 June, 2010, 09:51:07 PM
Hayfever  :(

I am not sure how old you are but there is a chance you will grow out of it.I started getting Hayfever when i was about 13 and now i am 42 the last 3 years have been free of Hayfever or virtually free of it.

I always used to get mine around this time of year and for years it would always start around the second week in June.I sneezed a few times the other day but that was it.

Try Beconase nasal spray.

I'm 41 and the hayfever is nowhere near as bad as it was, I've had it ever since I can remember but my late teens/early twenties where by far the worst for it as I developed seasonal asthma with it around that time.

It started to get better around my early thirties and I only seem to get it in short bursts now instead of pretty much constantly like I used too, and even then it's only a minor impediment these days compared to how crappy I used to feel with it.

Beconase FTW though as it's the only thing that's ever given me any relief from it, and believe me I have tried everything in the past. The only other thing that helped was keeping one room in the house as closed up as I could so the air stayed a bit staler in there so I could have somewhere to recover.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2010, 06:32:42 PM
When i used to get it really bad i would have to stay in which helped.Otherwise i found having a cold shower would help or splashing with cold water so it goes up your nose literally washing the allergens away.I also found that anti-histamines would make me feel depressed and the Hayfever itself would make me very irritable.

I used to get it badly when i lived in central London with all that pollen blowing around from the parks and gardens not to mention the traffic pollution and particulates etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 June, 2010, 11:45:09 PM
My brother might be going legit mental.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 June, 2010, 11:53:59 PM
 :o   I'm sorry to hear that, Roger.  :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 June, 2010, 12:11:24 AM
He's always had a temper and he's always been immature, spiteful and selfish, so it's entirely possible (probable, even)  that this is business as usual, but as far as I know this is the first time he's been this way at work. To be perfectly frank, I don't really give a shit, but I don't want to be around* if he goes completely off the deep end.

*It might be that I WOULD want to be around just a little bit too much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 25 June, 2010, 12:11:37 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2010, 06:32:42 PM
I used to get it badly when i lived in central London with all that pollen blowing around from the parks and gardens not to mention the traffic pollution and particulates etc.

Conversely, I got the worst hayfever I've ever had when I lived in Egham, Surrey, and found that venturing into central London was pretty much the only way I could alleviate the symptoms.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 25 June, 2010, 12:23:21 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 24 June, 2010, 11:45:09 PM
My brother might be going legit mental.

Is your brother named Scott?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 June, 2010, 12:38:55 AM
Yes, and he can give you cancer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 25 June, 2010, 07:42:53 AM
Your brother is Dr. Manhattan?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 26 June, 2010, 06:23:04 AM
Every other day I'm still knackered after 9 hours sleep, but I get woken up by my cough at 6 and am wide awake. Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 26 June, 2010, 04:45:13 PM
It is far too hot for staticgirls.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 June, 2010, 05:02:38 PM
Far too hot for sharks, too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 June, 2010, 05:13:12 PM
And me, I'm hiding until the sun goes down (if only Nik Kershaw would let it).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 June, 2010, 05:20:23 PM
I am not finding it that hot particularly but mind you i am on the coast so that might make a difference.In any event i dont find hot temperatures a problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 June, 2010, 05:24:10 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 26 June, 2010, 05:20:23 PM
I am not finding it that hot particularly but mind you i am on the coast so that might make a difference.In any event i dont find hot temperatures a problem.

I'm near the coast (couple of miles)and high up, which helps as we get plenty of wind.

Still bloody hot here though.Not a huge fan myself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 June, 2010, 05:37:33 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 26 June, 2010, 05:02:38 PM
Far too hot for sharks, too.

Fish of all kinds it seems.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 June, 2010, 10:05:06 PM
Hot weather leads to erect nipples. I was wearing a polyester shirt so it was all scratchy on said nipples.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 26 June, 2010, 10:31:04 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 26 June, 2010, 10:05:06 PM
Hot weather leads to erect nipples. I was wearing a polyester shirt so it was all scratchy on said nipples.

My nip's are permanently erect but never have problems with rubbing and chafing.
The sun is a twat though as I shouldn't be working out in it, on a lighter note better sun than rain.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 June, 2010, 10:52:33 PM
Before I go downstairs I have to put on clothes, then when I go downstairs I have to get a towel, put some rubbish in the bin, fill up my water bottle(s), put them in the fridge, have a poo, go in the shower, put my dirty clothes in the wash, take my water bottles(s) from the fridge and then go back upstairs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 June, 2010, 12:36:28 AM
The rules of professional air hockey are bullshit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 27 June, 2010, 12:40:00 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 26 June, 2010, 10:52:33 PM
Before I go downstairs I have to put on clothes, then when I go downstairs I have to get a towel, put some rubbish in the bin, fill up my water bottle(s), put them in the fridge, have a poo, go in the shower, put my dirty clothes in the wash, take my water bottles(s) from the fridge and then go back upstairs.



No one's forcing you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 June, 2010, 01:06:07 AM
Clearly you just want me to be naked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 27 June, 2010, 01:22:23 AM
I was being polite.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 June, 2010, 11:07:39 AM
It's not too hot for me, but it's too hot for my rabbits. They aren't very active between 11am and 4pm on the best of days: that's when they like to nap. As a consequence of it being too hot they seem to be spending most of their day lying underneath their hutch. Strange creatures. There are cooler, shadier places in the garden for them to sprawl out, and they have used them before.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 June, 2010, 01:55:12 PM
I was going to go to the beach but its way too crowded as i hate crowded beaches and also it stank down there with the stink of disposable barbeques and the air was full of smoke.I could go further afield to find a beach that isnt full of people but i really cant be bothered.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 27 June, 2010, 02:12:07 PM
I have just found a dessicated toad in the greenhouse. Not sure how I'm going to break this to Mole and Ratty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2010, 02:41:23 PM
This week I have been trying to find two things in my collection to take pics of, for Fridays blog, on and off I have looked everywhere!
Today, I decide to look in the first place I looked for them, as they had to be there, guess what! Yes there they were, looking up at me. The reason I didn't see them before was because I thought I'd put them away in a certain way, so as to find them quickly but I hadn't and therefore it was rather confusing.

Anyway, you'll find out what I was looking for on Friday  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 June, 2010, 10:44:22 PM
Shower room strikes again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 27 June, 2010, 10:46:08 PM
Today I got shampoo in my eye. It hurt. I regained sight about 10 minutes later though so it's okay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 27 June, 2010, 11:04:20 PM
mini mogs birthday party today one woman rang at the last minute because she only "just" found the invite and anyway thought it was next week (how she did that when she'd just found it...) on family bought ALL their kids including ione brat who thought it was his party ,he actually took one of the seats for the other kids! we had one no show so being nice, my wife let him have the chips and his cute 2 yr old sis have a butty then the little shit demanded pudding! and sweets!! swear to grud he had worms !!! also the parent buffet we put on was invite for all the parents who came left there kids and fucked off outside for the afternoon not bothering to help or even see if we'd killed their children and then said lazy dad came in and filled a plate ...my wifes far to diplomatic.... >:(


  and we had a pissed man turn up who was pissed when he arrived shouting "oi" to our helpers so when i went over he must have realised he was in the wrong place at the wrong time i am not a fighter but if he'd have disrupted mini's do i mighthave made an exception.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 June, 2010, 11:26:25 PM
I bought some Boots own-brand hayfever eye drops yesterday, they appear to be made from a mixture of battery acid and salt water.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 June, 2010, 03:43:58 PM
Weaver fish. owowowowowowowo
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 June, 2010, 04:40:39 PM
My stupid exuberant gay neighbours.I am tired of their noise and their constant loud gabbling away ten to the dozen and their stupid laughing out loud every 5 seconds and all the other stupid noises that they are making and the stupid ugly bint who is with them with her obnoxious shrieking voice that doesnt stop.I feel like taping her mouth up or stuffing something into it.

Horrible and i find this with a lot of women and people in general.Horrible voices andthey make far too much noise and they get right on my tits.

I think i am going to have to shut my window as they are drinking which means its only going to get worse.More idiotic behaviour on the way.....

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 June, 2010, 04:51:13 PM
Are you sure you haven't fallen thrpugh a wormhole into an episode of Three's Company, Peter "Mr. Roper" Wolf?  (if so:  the gay guy's only pretending - he's really Buffy Summer's robotic wannabe  stepdad!).  Sadly it sound more like Will & Grace (more squealing, less lingerie).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 June, 2010, 05:37:38 PM
They are so clueless that they dont even know how to set alight to a Barbeque to get it going.

::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 28 June, 2010, 05:58:31 PM
Using new washing machine/dryer. I hit auto for drying and realised the default setting is 2hrs. Instructions say not to interrupt drying. Like a sauna here now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 June, 2010, 06:14:43 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 28 June, 2010, 05:58:31 PM
Using new washing machine/dryer. I hit auto for drying and realised the default setting is 2hrs. Instructions say not to interrupt drying. Like a sauna here now.

Nonsense.You can turn it off at the mains.

Just turn it off.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 28 June, 2010, 06:21:51 PM
Punched myself in the balls.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 June, 2010, 06:50:30 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 28 June, 2010, 06:21:51 PM
Punched myself in the balls.

Future generations applaud your foresight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 28 June, 2010, 07:02:18 PM
Especially since I was turned into a voodoo doll of a certain metal detector guy...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 28 June, 2010, 07:36:24 PM
I'm meant to be going to school 'til Friday even though all we're doing is watching DVDs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 June, 2010, 08:16:24 PM
Another hot day and another late finish.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 28 June, 2010, 11:51:26 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 28 June, 2010, 04:51:13 PM
Are you sure you haven't fallen thrpugh a wormhole into an episode of Three's Company, Peter "Mr. Roper" Wolf?

The (original) UK version's called Man About The House.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 June, 2010, 12:52:26 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 28 June, 2010, 03:43:58 PM
Weaver fish. owowowowowowowo

Oh no!  :o
When I was a kid and living in Brighton, I used to live in fear of stepping on a weaver fish. I thought something terrible and potentially lethal or at least debilitating might result from it. Consequently, from the age of 10 I would only paddle or swim while wearing plimsoles. Hope the pain wears off soon.

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 28 June, 2010, 07:02:18 PM
Especially since I was turned into a voodoo doll of a certain metal detector guy...

'Metal detector guy.' Now, that's hurtful!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 29 June, 2010, 08:03:48 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 28 June, 2010, 03:43:58 PM
Weaver fish. owowowowowowowo

Stepped on a sea urchin when I lived by the Med as a small boy. At first they thought it was a Weaver fish and medical opinion was that I'd got off lightly, so you have my sympathies!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 June, 2010, 08:21:05 AM
I caught a Greater Weever when I was fishing from a boat a few years ago, the skipper spotted me reeling it in and maniacally beat it to a pulp against the side of the boat with a big wooden club. I think he must have had a traumatic experience in the past with one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 June, 2010, 06:53:49 PM
I got one question wrong on my Regular Reading and Viewing today tarnishing my otherwise 100% record.

WH Smiths in Waverley doesn't have the Meg or the Prog in stock so I only have last months copy of SCIFI NOW to read.

This is offset by the fact that JOY IN REPETITION by Prince has just. shuffled onto my stereo and that. I hapve Disgea to play on my DS.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 June, 2010, 06:59:38 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 29 June, 2010, 06:53:49 PM
I got one question wrong on my Regular Reading and Viewing today tarnishing my otherwise 100% record.

Huh?  :eh:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 June, 2010, 07:16:27 PM
It's a mandatory/regulatory thing we have to do every quarter covering things like money laundering, terrorist attacks, data security etc. In 5 years I don't think I've got a question wrong. Until today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 June, 2010, 07:24:37 PM
I must have picked up 50 cigarette ends that were scattered all over the front yard after next door had their Barby last night.

Some people have no class and its probably the same kind of people who litter the church garden across the road who use the lawn as an ashtray and leave all their litter on the beach.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 June, 2010, 08:06:05 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 29 June, 2010, 07:16:27 PM
It's a mandatory/regulatory thing we have to do every quarter covering things like money laundering, terrorist attacks, data security etc. In 5 years I don't think I've got a question wrong. Until today.
Wow! I didn't know anybody actually bothered to do it!

Minor impediment: I'd never heard of a weaver fish until this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 29 June, 2010, 08:10:26 PM
A lot of smokers seem to think the world is their own personal ashtray. Fag ends strewn everywhere.

Working for the NHS, I'm always taken aback by all the heavily pregnant women in pink dressing gowns that hang around out the front of the maternity block at Whiston, puffing away on their Woodbines and flinging the ends on the floor.

Mind you, the pregnoids don't have the monopoly on it. The main A&E entrance is always good for a comedy smoker or two. I particularly like it when you see the ones who've brought their drip stand down with them. You can't be that ill if you're willing to lug that thing all the way down here!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 29 June, 2010, 08:13:19 PM
have trouble sleeping...got some boots own sleepy tabs herbal it says on the tin...took them last night ...up all night feelings of anxiety paranoia and a wierd all over "ache" that i can only liken to when you have pins and needles but the sickening bit when you try to move on a small scale but all over my body!! didnt sleep a bleedin wink for all my troubles ...on a bright note was awake for the thunder last night!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 01 July, 2010, 11:58:58 AM
Quote from: Banners on 22 June, 2010, 10:29:15 PM
Photoshop CS5 won't install. Bugger.

...and now Adobe Customer Support have given up trying to help. That's welcome thanks for spending thousands of pounds on their stuff.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 01 July, 2010, 12:09:08 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 29 June, 2010, 08:13:19 PM
have trouble sleeping...got some boots own sleepy tabs herbal it says on the tin...took them last night ...up all night feelings of anxiety paranoia and a wierd all over "ache" that i can only liken to when you have pins and needles but the sickening bit when you try to move on a small scale but all over my body!! didnt sleep a bleedin wink for all my troubles ...on a bright note was awake for the thunder last night!

These 'sleeping tablets' sound a little like some acid I've had to me :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 July, 2010, 04:57:57 PM
I recommend Tescos brand of earplugs for dealing with noisy neighbours as they seem to be more comfortable than  the Boots version.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 01 July, 2010, 07:42:09 PM
There is a certain type of person who annoy me to put it mildly.
The cretin theat appears at your door,flashes some crappy id badge and starts by saying
"Don't worry I'm not here to sell you anything!", before asking about your double glazing/energy supplier/roofing etc in the hope that you will suddenly lose all sense and take them up on whatever shite offer they claim not to be trying to sell you!!!

Glad i got that off my chest. It was either vent it here or chase him down the road with a bat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 01 July, 2010, 07:51:17 PM
Quote from: Emp on 01 July, 2010, 07:42:09 PM
There is a certain type of person who annoy me to put it mildly.
The cretin theat appears at your door,flashes some crappy id badge and starts by saying
"Don't worry I'm not here to sell you anything!", before asking about your double glazing/energy supplier/roofing etc in the hope that you will suddenly lose all sense and take them up on whatever shite offer they claim not to be trying to sell you!!!

Glad i got that off my chest. It was either vent it here or chase him down the road with a bat.


My wife is a pain in the arse with these people, the only method she has of dealing with them is to tell them that her husband makes all the decisions and to come back later when I'm home from work  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 July, 2010, 10:00:28 PM
Quote from: Emp on 01 July, 2010, 07:42:09 PM
There is a certain type of person who annoy me to put it mildly.
The cretin theat appears at your door,flashes some crappy id badge and starts by saying
"Don't worry I'm not here to sell you anything!", before asking about your double glazing/energy supplier/roofing etc in the hope that you will suddenly lose all sense and take them up on whatever shite offer they claim not to be trying to sell you!!!

Glad i got that off my chest. It was either vent it here or chase him down the road with a bat.

Ask them if they'd like to come in and find out how you can offer them peace of mind through Jesus. Don't forget the creepy smile.

Alternatively, if Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses turn up, ask them if they'd like to come in and find out how you can offer them peace of mind through better life insurance.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 July, 2010, 11:06:39 PM
I was once somewhat rude to some Jehovah's as I was leaving for work, and an hour later I had my bag snatched.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 July, 2010, 11:44:29 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 01 July, 2010, 11:06:39 PM
I was once somewhat rude to some Jehovah's as I was leaving for work, and an hour later I had my bag snatched.

Do you think it was a curse?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 July, 2010, 11:45:53 PM
THAT WAS THE JOKE
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 July, 2010, 02:51:28 AM
So I guess they know I'm not no company man. But I can pull on a rope, kill a cow fast as any other fucker can.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 July, 2010, 02:08:39 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 01 July, 2010, 11:45:53 PM
THAT WAS THE JOKE

THAT WELL KNOWN JOKE ABOUT JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES PUTTING CURSES ON PEOPLE?

...Because they do that, you know.  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 July, 2010, 04:10:20 PM
Just finished a long blog (don't know when it'll go out yet) about the Citadel miniatures. Lots of writing, a few pics and a lot of time spent sorting it out.
Guess what, just went through my Dredd files on the computer and found some extra bloody stuff  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 03 July, 2010, 08:51:20 PM
finding extra stuff can't be a bad thing surely.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 04 July, 2010, 12:06:00 AM
the people on the estate who,might have well been next door for all the noise they are making...the longest bbq in history with the loudest cackling women and gobshites ever too hot to sleep with the window shut but even the double glazing doesnt drown them out... >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 04 July, 2010, 12:15:53 AM
Sounds like a case for enforced sterilisation...not that it helps you.

On a lighter note i heard this in a doctors surgery/chemist

Blonde knuckledragger with room temp iq : Well they can refuse to give you
                                          contraception if yer,yknow, like blonde.

In her particular case i thought it should have been mandatory!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 July, 2010, 07:24:46 AM
Quote from: Emp on 03 July, 2010, 08:51:20 PM
finding extra stuff can't be a bad thing surely.

I decided to just add it at the end of the piece, it'll be out of place but I'll explain it in the blog  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 July, 2010, 10:07:33 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 04 July, 2010, 12:06:00 AM
the people on the estate who,might have well been next door for all the noise they are making...the longest bbq in history with the loudest cackling women and gobshites ever too hot to sleep with the window shut but even the double glazing doesnt drown them out... >:(

we had that on Friday.  We live in a fairly sleepy little close really but the people in one of the houses nearbye managed to make a massive noise. They have to do it when we can't close the windows don't they!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 July, 2010, 08:52:46 PM
Spent two hours putting two shelves up - measuring it all nicely and even using a spirit level. Looked good and solid, felt very proud. Went downstairs for celebratory cup of tea - then heard a big bang. Shelves broken on the floor, holes ripped out of wall, and my desk damaged.

Bugger.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 05 July, 2010, 10:15:19 PM
after solving the virus quibble mcrosoft updated me with a service pack for vista which killed my computer...despite an offer from our it guy at work to look at it the wife did a factory reset on it so EVERYTHING is gone!!!! had to reinstall the broadband,avg ,hp the woiks! but (and hindsight is a wonderful thing ) lost all the mini mog pics and my music files!!! are they gone forever? or can they be by some miricale saved???
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 July, 2010, 11:07:16 PM
Quote from: mogzillaare they gone forever? or can they be by some miricale saved???

Depends what you mean by a "factory reset" - presumably you used the rescue partition? Assuming there's no backup, try file recovery tools like Recuva (http://www.piriform.com/recuva) or RecoverMyFiles (http://www.recovermyfiles.com/).

After that, subscribe to something like Carbonite (http://www.carbonite.com/) and get into a regular backup habit by using something like Macrium (http://www.macrium.com) - one day you'll be glad you did.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 05 July, 2010, 11:38:17 PM
dont know what she did think it was the computer manufaturers factory default reset thingy (cant you tell i know a lot about computers?) luckily i think we have hard copies of most of the photos but unless i can get the stuff back have lost the cute videos of mini dancing to s club 7!

i really hate computers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 05 July, 2010, 11:46:04 PM
...oh and my cursor keeps translating everything into spanish mexican and all.? hw do i stop it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 July, 2010, 12:45:36 AM
Quote from: mogzilla...but unless i can get the stuff back have lost the cute videos of mini dancing to s club 7!

Try the recover tools. As long as the files haven't been written over yet, you should be okay to retrieve them. To that end, refrain from installing anything major or saving any big files until you have tried these tools.

As for the cursor changing the language, I have no idea, sorry.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 July, 2010, 01:35:42 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 05 July, 2010, 11:46:04 PM
...oh and my cursor keeps translating everything into spanish mexican and all.? hw do i stop it?

The Microsoft software update must be one that has been created for the United States.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 07 July, 2010, 12:56:00 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 05 July, 2010, 11:38:17 PM
dont know what she did think it was the computer manufaturers factory default reset thingy (cant you tell i know a lot about computers?) luckily i think we have hard copies of most of the photos but unless i can get the stuff back have lost the cute videos of mini dancing to s club 7!

i really hate computers

you have lerent a lesson its allways a good ider to back your files up on a externil harddrive I lerent that lession the hard way my self.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 July, 2010, 01:27:36 PM
Teenage Tips stoodf on his laptop and broke the screen.

Cheaper than getting it fixed, we just got a monitor to plug in.  It worked fine for a while but now just goes into Power Saving Mode (same happens when we plug it into our PC).

So I foresee a night of me on the internet trying to find out exactly which obscurely hidden software settings I need to change to be able to get the new monitor out of power saving more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 07 July, 2010, 01:47:38 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocusbut now just goes into Power Saving Mode...

Take the battery out, it'll be fine.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 07 July, 2010, 03:43:15 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 07 July, 2010, 01:27:36 PM
Teenage Tips stoodf on his laptop and broke the screen.

I wouldn't have thought a laptop would give much of a height advantage..!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 07 July, 2010, 03:51:29 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 05 July, 2010, 11:46:04 PM
...oh and my cursor keeps translating everything into spanish mexican and all.? hw do i stop it?

I was getting that on a work PC, if you click on the box that appears with the translation in it, and sroll down you get options to switch it off
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 July, 2010, 04:00:35 PM
It's the Yap Shop's first birthday party tonight. John Wagner's going to try and turn up. Pat Mills, too. Rob Williams is coming. Possibilities on Ian Gibson and Dave Gibbons. And it's all free.

I'm currently cacking myself in case nobody turns up. Follow the link in my sig if you fancy it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 07 July, 2010, 04:31:10 PM
Sharky- sorry I won't be able to join you tonight- but that sounds like an utter blast.

Have fun kids!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 07 July, 2010, 07:10:49 PM
Rude and obnoxious people who just dont know when to shut their mouths even when its for their own good just like annoying little yapping dogs.I wont bother with anecdotes but TWICE in the last week [one of these instances was 1 hour ago] i have been forced to raise my voice [which i hate doing] and put them back in their place as i have a short fuse and i dont like provocation and i am still wound up right now.
>:(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 July, 2010, 11:02:01 AM
My peridium (sic?) is on fire.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 July, 2010, 11:46:55 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 08 July, 2010, 11:02:01 AM
My peridium (sic?) is on fire.

"The covering of the spore- bearing organ in many fungi."  Intriguing.  And revealing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 July, 2010, 12:05:53 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 08 July, 2010, 11:02:01 AM
My peridium (sic?) is on fire.

I think you mesan perineum (Or Banus, Taint, Vanilla Strip)

and ouch  :o.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 July, 2010, 12:50:28 PM
That, or he's a Mi-Go. Been messing about on Pluto again, Roger?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 July, 2010, 08:53:17 PM
Today.
Argued with the ticket woman at the train station. No I do not want a Travel Card for London, I am able to walk from Victoria to where I want to go, you old witch. Stop trying to sell me a more expensive ticket, twice (Saturday & Sunday).

Next I went to the barbers to get my beard trimmed and shaped, Jesus Christ it's nearly all bloody gone. I closed my eyes and the twat just took it near enough to the skin. I hope Dan can colour this in over the weekend (the missus says you can see it easily but I think not ::))

Had another conversation with the idiots at Virgin, TV and Broadband lost AGAIN, fifth time in a fortnight. They said excuse, excuse, excuse, blah, blah, blah. I said I will go to Sky if this doesn't get sorted. They replied, here's some money as a good will gesture ;)

Lastly, went for a bike ride with Sam (we have a tandem) and still he doesn't peddle. I sweated buckets and nearly died in the heat, had to drink loads of Orange squash on return.

Tomorrow I am taking my lovely wife to Bluewater to get her a dress/outfit for our anniversary. I am really looking forward to that I can tell you :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 July, 2010, 09:04:01 PM
I am sick of shag awful customers who keep demanding something for nothing. And there is the customer who stands over your shoulder for the entirety of the install watching everything you do. I have a canny knack of jerking backwards and knocking into them.
On the plus side I had some beautiful meat samosa's made for me today.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 July, 2010, 09:06:48 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 July, 2010, 08:53:17 PM


Had another conversation with the idiots at Virgin, TV and Broadband lost AGAIN, fifth time in a fortnight. They said excuse, excuse, excuse, blah, blah, blah. I said I will go to Sky if this doesn't get sorted. They replied, here's some money as a good will gesture ;)

(
Whats the problem your are having, Maybe I can point you in the right direction.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 July, 2010, 09:16:00 PM
The picture freezes, and then you lose the signal completely and at the same time the Broadband goes down. They keep saying that it's a fault in the area, what can you do  ::)

It started during the England V Germany match and has done it every couple of days since and each day it does it a couple of times.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 July, 2010, 09:27:00 PM
There is definitely not enough signal strength coming into your household cable. An engineer needs to come round to check signal levels and either up your signal in the base unit (The green boxes randomly scattered in the streets) or failing that replace the cable from the B/U to your terminal box with a thicker cable.
What sometimes happens is a lazy engineer will lower a house holds cable to replace it with the one they are installing rather than spending and extra 10 minutes trying to find the fault on theirs. All it may be is one of you F connectors may be degraded and just needs replacing, a 2 minute job.
Ring the twats at customer services and tell them a friend had come round checked the signal strengths and says that they are too low.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 July, 2010, 09:45:26 PM
Cheers for that info, when it drops off again, in the next few days I will mention this fact.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 July, 2010, 03:39:38 PM
TV and Broadband went again at 15:15 (same time again), rang the poor middle people up and quoted vzzbux. Engineer coming Monday  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 09 July, 2010, 05:35:23 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 July, 2010, 03:39:38 PM
TV and Broadband went again at 15:15 (same time again), rang the poor middle people up and quoted vzzbux. Engineer coming Monday  ::)

A result then !
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 09 July, 2010, 06:47:34 PM
I hate bloody shops/shopkeepers who display signs for cold drinks,when what they mean is that they've turned the lights on in the chiller but bugger all else.....which results in you getting a warm drink or mounting an expedition to the back of the chiller in the vain hope of finding something slightly below room temperature  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 09 July, 2010, 08:06:10 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 July, 2010, 03:39:38 PM
TV and Broadband went again at 15:15 (same time again), rang the poor middle people up and quoted vzzbux. Engineer coming Monday  ::)

Glad to be of service. Lets hope the service engineer is on the ball.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 July, 2010, 02:28:18 AM
Crazy Jesus lady was out & about in MK today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 July, 2010, 07:56:29 PM
Having so far thorughly enjoyed the old-school X-Men crossover Second Coming (cleverly designed as just a single continuous story told across 14 issues of various X-titles (with additional disposable one-shot things if you were really interested) rather than the usual hopping about and repetition of events (as plagued less-successful parallel The Siege), I find myself looking at the first issue of the next storyline before the current one is even finished.  Isn't that a bit silly?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 July, 2010, 08:12:29 PM
Car insurance. Dweeb phones up telling me my insurance runs out soon and he's found me a cheaper quote and patches me through to a broker who thinks I have phoned up to ask for a quote rather than their sales guy phoning me up speculatively, and offers me a quote £150 more expensive than Direct Line, my current insurer. I turn it down. Later they phone me back with an improved offer, £300 cheaper, from Norwich Union. I go directly to the Norwich Union website and get myself a quote that saves me a further £50 and allows me to pay in ten instalments rather than two.

The annual premiums I was quoted ranged from £398 to £781 for near-identical products.

Insurance is a bunch of crap, and the premium is different depending on what arbitrary figure you put on the car's value and your best guess at how many miles you drive in a year. How should I know? Putting 8,000 instead of 10,000 saves me £15. Alright, I'll say 8,000 then. Flipping heck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 July, 2010, 08:22:40 PM
Just got back from the Minty shoot to be told by the wife that the postie had put two 'while you were out cards' through the letterbox, whilst she and Sam were bloody well in.
Drokk it, these are Dredd items as well. Will have to wait till Monday now  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 July, 2010, 08:23:34 PM
No no Usher, you have it all wrong.  Insurance costs are all based on strict actuarial tables developed by experts from vast amounts of international data to model outcomes based on a wide range of risk factors.  

That's why they can cut my premium by 30% if I threaten to go elsewhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 July, 2010, 08:33:59 PM
When I phoned Direct Line to cancel my policy renewal they offered to look again at my premium but I told them not to bother, because I didn't want to spend any longer on the phone and just taking the Norwich Union offer, having already purchased it, was less hassle than having to cancel it if Direct Line's revised offer turned out to be better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 July, 2010, 12:13:14 AM
I have a weird ass bulge on my left knee. I can't do any kneeling for now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 July, 2010, 12:15:44 AM
Upload a pic so we can share with your mutation  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 12 July, 2010, 12:23:49 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 12 July, 2010, 12:13:14 AM
I have a weird ass bulge on my left knee. I can't do any kneeling for now.


You shit through your knee?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 July, 2010, 01:02:43 AM
Indeed I do. Straight on to your mom's chest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 12 July, 2010, 04:20:32 AM
Don't worry she'll toilet train you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 13 July, 2010, 05:32:46 PM
Internet slowed by rain. In England. Who'd have think it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 13 July, 2010, 05:38:34 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 July, 2010, 08:33:59 PM
... and just taking the Norwich Union offer,

Splutter! It's Aviva ! It means 'renewal' in Arabic so something. It's not been NU since June 1st 2009 which incidentally was the day I started - no free muffins since. Has the millions been paid to Paul Whitehouse and to change the steward's jackets at Norwich City all been a waste?

Drive safely Usher for those you mow down will darken my desk and frankly I've got enough to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 13 July, 2010, 08:42:13 PM
First to second gear seemed to escape me today. Like L.O.D it must be the rain. >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 July, 2010, 10:08:27 PM
Tuesday pretty much escaped me today. Rain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 July, 2010, 10:09:38 PM
Never mind, it'll soon be Wednesday - and we all know what that means!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 July, 2010, 10:50:29 PM
In a gesture of utter work-knackered stupidity, I just tried to log on to the chatroom.  Seriously, how the feck is it still Tuesday, it's been Tuesday for about a fortnight now.  Die you bastarding day, why won't you die.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 July, 2010, 12:05:12 AM
Banged my elbow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 July, 2010, 12:06:34 AM
Pervert!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 July, 2010, 12:08:02 AM
Also, Tordelback was evidently having a bad day and now it has ended.  :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 July, 2010, 06:04:34 PM
Youtube is being a pain today.

I keep getting Google Server Error pages the whole time.

GGGRrrrrrrrr.......
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 July, 2010, 06:13:27 PM
Never mind YouTube - the Yap Shop's up and running!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 14 July, 2010, 06:14:01 PM
I live in a secluded area, it's past 6. See a man pull up in front of house, looks suspicious, grab sledgehammer. Turns out he's the delivery man for some books I ordered, the packaging was already partly open.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 July, 2010, 06:23:07 PM
It also feels like autumn today as well and while i quite like this weather in itself i was enjoying the hot weather a lot .

Quote from: Inev on 14 July, 2010, 06:14:01 PM
I live in a secluded area,



How fortunate you are.

I wish i did.I used to live in secluded areas.

Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 July, 2010, 06:13:27 PM
Never mind YouTube - the Yap Shop's up and running!

I will pop in a bit later as i am in a good mood for once as Wednesday evenings i am usually in a bad mood and noone has annoyed me today so far.......
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 July, 2010, 06:34:43 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 14 July, 2010, 06:23:07 PM

I will pop in a bit later as i am in a good mood for once as Wednesday evenings i am usually in a bad mood and noone has annoyed me today so far.......

I can always poke you repeatedly in the ear with a frozen weasel, if that'll help?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 14 July, 2010, 07:11:42 PM
Came home today to a letter from my mother's life insurance company asking her to take out an "Over 50s" guaranteed policy despite having paid out on her life insurance two months ago.

Closely followed by a phonecall from our gas supplier asking to speak to her to confirm that following her death the bills should now be addressed to me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 July, 2010, 11:30:03 AM
Evo 2010 happened and I didn't know about it. Bah. Shockingly enough, Daigo won.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 15 July, 2010, 11:32:59 AM
Looks like rain...on St Swithin's Day

well, there goes the summer


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 15 July, 2010, 03:10:36 PM
I am on holiday miles from any newsies that stock Twothy. :(
My netbook is too small to view the downloadable version. I shall wait patiently....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 15 July, 2010, 05:54:08 PM
after a lie in and a hearty macdonalds brekky i went to my safeguarding children course today one of the activities was to see some pics of non accidental injuries to children youngest was 9 weeks old ... could'nt wait to get home to mini mog tonight...cannot belive people especially parents could be so evil heard loads of stories read plenty in case files but to see the injuries hammered it home big style... :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 July, 2010, 06:55:17 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 14 July, 2010, 07:11:42 PM
Came home today to a letter from my mother's life insurance company asking her to take out an "Over 50s" guaranteed policy despite having paid out on her life insurance two months ago.

Closely followed by a phonecall from our gas supplier asking to speak to her to confirm that following her death the bills should now be addressed to me.

Barmy, illogical, insensitive and totally lacking in common sense.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 July, 2010, 11:44:49 PM
Having a massive tidy up this evening I discovered I missed #69 and #71 of The Walking Dead. Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 16 July, 2010, 12:32:04 AM
No one wants to smell my clothes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 16 July, 2010, 02:24:38 PM
I've just read a 60, count 'em, 60 page paper on what is essentially muck.

I've give up for the day.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 July, 2010, 02:31:13 PM
"Essentially Muck" sounds like a high-class subsidiary of Otto Sump's company.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 July, 2010, 03:42:03 PM
I am still trying to stop Symantec taking money from my credit card for their crappy Norton Internet Security software I stopped using ages ago. Symantec's customer service is almost impossible to contact and pretty useless when you do get through to Delhi, because they just want to take your money, not give you service. Barclaycard's customer services department (also in Delhi) will open a dispute but only after I contact the 'merchant' and get an explanation of the charges from them, which is not as easy as Barclaycard likes to pretend it should be.

Don't buy Norton software, and never buy software downloads. You're much better off buying a disc and never mind the carbon footprint.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 July, 2010, 04:44:44 PM
I just renewed my Norton Internet Security today (oops!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 July, 2010, 07:14:32 PM
Just ensure the default 'on-going protection' option isn't selected, and keep an eye out in case they start stealing from you if ever you decide to stop using it or upgrade to a different Norton product! In my case I switched off auto-renewal and they switched it back on again so they could go on charging.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 July, 2010, 07:18:08 PM
Better still, use a free one like Comodo Internet Security Premium. (I know it's called "Premium," but it is free and I've been happy with Comodo's free products for years.)

http://www.comodo.com/home/internet-security/free-internet-security.php
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 16 July, 2010, 07:30:52 PM
Quote from: Banners on 16 July, 2010, 04:44:44 PM
I just renewed my Norton Internet Security today (oops!)

M@

For the love of grud, why?
It's a massively bloated resource hog, rivalled only by Windows Vista itself.

Please tell me you're not running Vista...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 July, 2010, 02:13:59 PM
People who tidy up and throw things away without asking wether you still want them.I had an early 19th cent wooden chimneypiece/firesurround which i reclaimed about 3 yrs ago and it was stored in a friends basement which is semi derelict and is used for storage of junk.I knew exactly where it was and i found a use for it as it was going to go into a museum house that is being restored.I tell the curator that i have and he is welcome to but of course when i go to pick it up from where it was stored it is no longer there so i have to disappoint the curator of the museum house and i was annoyed that it was no longer where i left it.

I hate people who move things and tidy up and either throw things away or move them so i no longer know where they are.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 17 July, 2010, 05:25:20 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 July, 2010, 02:13:59 PM
People who tidy up and throw things away without asking wether you still want them.I had an early 19th cent wooden chimneypiece/firesurround which i reclaimed about 3 yrs ago and it was stored in a friends basement which is semi derelict and is used for storage of junk.I knew exactly where it was and i found a use for it as it was going to go into a museum house that is being restored.I tell the curator that i have and he is welcome to but of course when i go to pick it up from where it was stored it is no longer there so i have to disappoint the curator of the museum house and i was annoyed that it was no longer where i left it.

I hate people who move things and tidy up and either throw things away or move them so i no longer know where they are.

>:(

we have a nurse like that at work she keeps tidying my space/desk and hiding things!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 July, 2010, 07:22:00 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 July, 2010, 02:13:59 PM
when i go to pick it up from where it was stored it is no longer there so i have to disappoint the curator of the museum house and i was annoyed that it was no longer where i left it

Arrrrghh! Philistines. I do hope that got nicked or sold on and not chucked in landfill. Three years is a long time to be occupying someone else's storage space, but it would still be in my derelict garage after all that time, and I would have said "I'm having a clear out, so you'd better come and get it" before just chucking anything away. My girlfriend's mother, on the other hand, threw out a new pair of my girlfriend's lace-up boots that had been left in her stair cupboard about 3 months, and a working Atari games console and a dozen cartridges left in an upstairs bedroom cupboard. One of the hazards of leaving anything behind anywhere you've had a stake in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 July, 2010, 07:49:04 PM
 I HATE bike maintenance.I was adjusting my gear cable because it was stretched and it was frayed and its basically fucked and now i have to replace it and i need it operational in the morning.

I should have just left it alone and paid someone else to do it which is what i normally do and if i had done that i wouldnt be fucking annoyed  >:( like i am now.

I just hate working on anything mechanical and it always always always winds me up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 July, 2010, 09:31:35 PM
Quote from: Noisybast
Quote from: Banners
I just renewed my Norton Internet Security today (oops!)

M@

For the love of grud, why?
It's a massively bloated resource hog, rivalled only by Windows Vista itself.

Please tell me you're not running Vista...

I was running Kaspersky until it regularly starting shooting the CPU up to 99% for no reason. Norton had a free trial and it seemed to be okay for me. I bought an OEM license (naughty!) so no worries about auto-renewal. Still on XP here too :-)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 18 July, 2010, 10:19:56 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 July, 2010, 07:49:04 PM
I HATE bike maintenance.I was adjusting my gear cable because it was stretched and it was frayed and its basically fucked and now i have to replace it and i need it operational in the morning.

I should have just left it alone and paid someone else to do it which is what i normally do and if i had done that i wouldnt be fucking annoyed  >:( like i am now.

I just hate working on anything mechanical and it always always always winds me up.

I did that recently.  I've made a bit of a horlicks of it and probably need to take it for a service anyway.  Thing is i'm struggling to ride now because of failing eyes so should probably just give it up (though I love it).  I have an exercise bike at home now which is keeping me fit.

I get wound up trying to sort it all to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 July, 2010, 12:29:05 PM
I've found that the price for doing maintenance on anything is usually scuffed knuckles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 18 July, 2010, 06:51:04 PM
There's a new Weezer album.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 18 July, 2010, 10:59:07 PM
What the fuck is Jessi Slaughter?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 19 July, 2010, 12:02:05 AM
Some girl who tried to start a war with anonymous and didn't expect her life to be ruined apparently.

But it's okay, because her dad is backtracing everything to report people to cyberpolice. AND THE CONSEQUENCES WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 July, 2010, 12:14:38 AM
For the first time in my life, I feel old. As an ardent Malthusian, I have no other recourse other than to take a trip down the multi-storey.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 July, 2010, 11:16:09 PM
There was a bone in my fish. Fuck you, Pheonix Fish & Chips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 July, 2010, 11:38:43 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 July, 2010, 11:16:09 PM
There was a bone in my fish. Fuck you, Pheonix Fish & Chips.

Dont tell everyone or they will all want one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 July, 2010, 01:05:36 AM
Back in this thread i talked about someone who was loitering and snooping around here at night and tonight they were back.

I went downstairs to the kitchen for a bite to eat and then sat outside on the front step to eat as i wanted some fresh air.Everything was blacked out except the kitchen which wasnt noticable.As i was eating i watched someone look around and  walk into the yard and then walk behind the parked cars in an attempt to not be noticed as there was a light on nextdoor upstairs but the yard was quite dark.

All the while i was watching this as this idiot hadnt even noticed i was there.I finally asked what he thought he was doing and he said "I am looking for my friends house" which is the same story i got last time i enquired as this was the same individual.So i told him again to GTFO and other things i wont include here and i followed him out and he disappeared very quickly.

Next time i catch him in here if there is a next time i am going to physically remove him which is what i told him. >:(

I had a feeling something was up or about to happen as i opened the front door.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 July, 2010, 03:30:28 PM
...because a client wants to have a meeting to determine the size of a bookmark we are designing.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 20 July, 2010, 04:43:36 PM
... because I went into my local branch of $LARGEHIGHSTREETBANK$ in order to attend to some financial stuff for my Mum, over whose finances I have Power of Attorney. Only to discover that the half a fucking day I spent at her local branch of $SAMEHIGHSTREETBANK$ hadn't actually resulted in them making any fucking notes at all on the file to show that I had authority to deal with the account.

Gaah!

On the plus side, I earned so little last year, I don't actually have to pay any tax.

At least, I think that's plus.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 20 July, 2010, 07:30:44 PM
I so understand that. Spent ages trying to consolidate all my mother's accounts whilst she was still alive to simplify matters, only to find we missed a building society account with £5 in it. The time spent trying to get them to hand it over has already made it not worth pursuing further.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 July, 2010, 12:20:30 PM
I'm so tired.
Returned to the UK on a long haul flight on Saturday morning so I missed out Friday nights sleep completely. Kids woke me up early on Sunday and after walking around like a zombie all day I then couldn't sleep for all of Sunday night. Work then decided to change my hours for this week to a late shift and put me on the 24 hour call-out rota.
It's now Wednesday and I still haven't managed more than 5 hours sleep in one go.
blergghh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 21 July, 2010, 12:49:28 PM
I've been asked to teach English to two Spanish kids every day for a month, which is handy. Unfortunately I didn't find the email until nearly a week later. I hope they still need a tutor.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 July, 2010, 01:22:02 PM
Ive just finished writing the to-be-spoken introductions for all the acts at the upcoming 'night gallery' cabaret. Brilliant, you may think. And yes, everyone's happy with them. "They gave me chills" being the most-quoted response.
However.
Today, for my own pleasure, i did a little research into the background of the subject of one of the acts, and found to my absolute horror that it mirrors what i wrote almost exactly.
And ive written it as a build-up of gags, leading to one big bad-taste guffaw.
I now have to rewrite completely, as for anyone familiar with the history, i've written the offensive, nasty-minded shit possible! Bugger!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 July, 2010, 03:30:45 PM
At 15:05 whilst I was brushing my teeth, after climbing out of the shower I heard a faint tap on the brass door knocker (just the one tap I might add). I pulled my towel tightly around myself and went down stairs. It was only a female postal bod delivering my 'Mega City One Archives Vol III'  ::)

Bollocks I could see her writting out the red card so I didn't have time to put some shorts on and get back down stairs. So I just answered the door with said towel around my waist but not quite dripping wet. The things I have to do to get my 2000AD/Dredd fix.

I must say it didn't phaze her but she did say that it's the first time that it had happened in her career. So I'm glad I made her day  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 21 July, 2010, 03:38:45 PM
Because I've come to work today without my flash drive- so I have no access at all to any of my spreadsheets for sorting out any of the 101 things I'm doing. So I can't safely open the emails for the files to the new Zarjaz cover, or the completed strip for FutureQuake, or even the completed art for the back cover of the new FQ.

And this afternoon is the first time in nearly a week I've had an hour where I can look at stuff too.

Drokking typical.

However, on the plus side it means Idon't have to worry about trying to find time to read any of the thirty odd scripts that are in the files...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 22 July, 2010, 12:42:32 PM
Updating a .doc template in Open Office.

Four hours of my life.

I feel like writing a strongly-worded letter.

But I'm just going out now. I may be some time. 

:|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 July, 2010, 10:51:35 PM
Quote from: Inev on 19 July, 2010, 12:02:05 AM
Some girl who tried to start a war with anonymous and didn't expect her life to be ruined apparently.

But it's okay, because her dad is backtracing everything to report people to cyberpolice. AND THE CONSEQUENCES WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN!

It's wrong what they did to be honest.. but I did laugh at the dad seemingly cutting a WWE promo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 July, 2010, 11:48:00 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 22 July, 2010, 10:51:35 PM
Quote from: Inev on 19 July, 2010, 12:02:05 AM
Some girl who tried to start a war with anonymous and didn't expect her life to be ruined apparently.

But it's okay, because her dad is backtracing everything to report people to cyberpolice. AND THE CONSEQUENCES WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN!

It's wrong what they did to be honest.. but I did laugh at the dad seemingly cutting a WWE promo.

I wish I knew what any of this meant.  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 July, 2010, 11:55:07 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 22 July, 2010, 11:48:00 PM
I wish I knew what any of this meant.  :'(

Be careful what you wish for...

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xe3dj6_jessi-slaughter-before-b_webcam

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xe4ek1_jessi-slaughter-aka-kerligirl13-fra_news

Silly kid posts dodgy pics, gets into a fight with 4Chan, silly 4Chan acts like 4Chan, silly kid's silly Dad feeds the flames.  It's all too sordid.  And silly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 23 July, 2010, 12:04:18 AM
A young girl was the victim of some cyberbullying. Her (possibly tongue-in-cheek but stil rather ill-advised) attempt at retaliation went a bit wrong and she became the laughing stock of the entire internet. Or at least those portions of it that are frequented by vindictive teenagers.

It all got a bit out of hand. It's easy to see it all as a bit of a sideshow and have a good laugh but it's worth remembering that it is a child at the centre of it all.

Thats the bare bones, I'm not massively up to speed on it. I only know about it at all because someone (I think it was Graham Linehan but I can't really remember) brought it up on twitter as a warning to parents to monitor their kids online activity.

EDIT : Or you could just cick on Tordelbacks link for the actual story rather than my hazy half truths. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 July, 2010, 12:06:55 AM
THis is why I refuse to own a web cam and permanent marker covers the wife's laptop lens.







V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 July, 2010, 12:16:46 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 July, 2010, 11:55:07 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 22 July, 2010, 11:48:00 PM
I wish I knew what any of this meant.  :'(

Be careful what you wish for...

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xe3dj6_jessi-slaughter-before-b_webcam

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xe4ek1_jessi-slaughter-aka-kerligirl13-fra_news

Silly kid posts dodgy pics, gets into a fight with 4Chan, silly 4Chan acts like 4Chan, silly kid's silly Dad feeds the flames.  It's all too sordid.  And silly.

The parents are making a bad situation worse.

How silly.

00.38 seconds into the second video the mother in the background says either :

"We are going to come round and beat yer ass !"

or

"We are going to come and pee in yer ass !"

:o :lol:

Shortly after that she says : "I cant live in peace ...I can live in PC"  :lol:



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 23 July, 2010, 02:39:13 AM
Depressing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 July, 2010, 03:00:27 AM
Sounds like MIK needs to take my Advanced Solipsism Course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 23 July, 2010, 10:19:25 AM
I thought it was payday today, but it's not until next Wednesday. Shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 23 July, 2010, 10:28:56 AM
After about 2 years of having it on pre-order my copy of Doug Tennapel's Ghostopolis should be winging it's way to me...

Oh no. In the time it's taken to be published my bank has changed my debit card. So, even though i changed the card on the site and deleted the old one, my order won't go through.

Oh the agony! I love Mr Tennapel's stuff (though his politics ain't my cup of tea) and was hoping for a good read this weekend.

Ho bloody hum
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 July, 2010, 11:18:24 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 July, 2010, 11:55:07 PM
Silly kid posts dodgy pics, gets into a fight with 4Chan, silly 4Chan acts like 4Chan, silly kid's silly Dad feeds the flames.  It's all too sordid.  And silly.

Thanks. I see how insignificant and not worth anyone's time it all is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 23 July, 2010, 12:04:17 PM
....because it's been over 30C every afternoon all week in the office with 20% humidity. I have started having nightmares about being trapped in burning buildings etc. That's when I've been able to sleep - had a few panic attacks at being forced to work in those conditions too.

I am knackered. I am a zombie. My stomach is upset and I feel dizzy.

If it happens again this arvo I am off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 23 July, 2010, 01:46:42 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 23 July, 2010, 03:00:27 AM
Sounds like MIK needs to take my Advanced Solipsism Course.

Wouldn't a solipsism course be kind of missing the point of solipsism?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 23 July, 2010, 01:56:14 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 23 July, 2010, 01:46:42 PM
Wouldn't a solipsism course be kind of missing the point of solipsism?

Well,no. As you are all my constructs, the Advanced Solipsism Course is just one the ways I'm dealing with my reality. I don't know where I got Roger from, mind and why I made him bring it up.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 July, 2010, 05:27:40 PM
Whats solipism about innit ?

Quote from: House of Usher on 23 July, 2010, 11:18:24 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 July, 2010, 11:55:07 PM
Silly kid posts dodgy pics, gets into a fight with 4Chan, silly 4Chan acts like 4Chan, silly kid's silly Dad feeds the flames.  It's all too sordid.  And silly.

Thanks. I see how insignificant and not worth anyone's time it all is.

True but nevertheless it was very funny.Roger is the conduit between this forum and all the trashy teen culture on Youtube.

Also i nearly had a collision this afternoon while cycling down a busy main road in Brighton.As  i was cycling downhill i was going at quite a speed and this moron cyclist decides to pull out right in front of me without even looking at what was behind so i had to slam the brakes on and the difference between a collision was about 2 inches.The stupid twat didnt even notice this at all as he was wearing sunglasses and had headphones on which are a major distraction and therefore a hazard if you are using the road.Hazard perception is all very well and i consider the majority of cyclists in Brighton a hazard but with one or 2 seconds notice there is only so much you can do to avoid a collision.

And yes it was the usual hippy dropout drughead type.How typical.

Had there been a collision i would have given him a piece of my mind at the very least
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 July, 2010, 12:40:18 AM
Richard Desmond bought Five.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 July, 2010, 01:34:05 AM
I got my classic Doctor Who silver nemesis Cyberleader and Cyberman today and had to send them back because they were defective. but from what I did see they were very accurate and not just a re-releases of the earth shock Cybermen these ones are 100% new moulds so I can't wait till the replacements turn up thro the post. (http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/1885/silvernemesis.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 24 July, 2010, 01:38:12 AM
They look mighty fine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 July, 2010, 01:49:47 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 24 July, 2010, 01:38:12 AM
They look mighty fine.

lol this is taken from the web page I got them from the atachil toys are all redy in the post so I could not take photo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 24 July, 2010, 02:05:35 AM
they look ace, alright; i thought they were actual costumes at first.  just been watching the good doctor too - haven't really had a chance to see many Matt Smith ones till now. Bit weird, the Doc being younger than me, but he makes  a convincing Timelord.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dog Deever on 25 July, 2010, 03:17:47 AM
Fitba season has started again, so with hope in heart I headed off to Borough Briggs 'stadium'.

Knocked out of the Alba cup in the OPENING FUCKING GAME of the season, at home and by a FUCKING HANDBALL ON THE LINE goal that the INCOMPETENT ERSE-HOLE ref and his MORON LINESMAN completely ignored.

Next Saturday- knocked out of the CIS cup as well.

There is end to our collective minor-disappointment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 July, 2010, 08:43:40 AM
Party people in the house behind standing in their garden shouting inanities at each other until 6am this morning.  Our kids woke up at 6.30am.  Wife is sick with what the doc assured us was a non-contagious ailment she plainly caught from our daughter who had it last week, and I have a full day of urgent work to do.  I am not amused.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 July, 2010, 02:20:14 PM
Theres a rat in me kitchen - what am i going to do - theres a rat in me kitchen - what am going to do - when i catch the little fucker i am going to bite its head off. >:( >:(

This is an ongoing problem that was started when Cat bought it into the house and it escaped into the kitchen behind the units.I had previously caught 2 mice or rats that Cat had brought in and let them go in the church garden across the road but this one has proved more elusive and its a persistant fucker as well.I have had pest control in as well but they are useless as all they do is leave trays of rat poison around which it doesnt touch.

So late last night i decided to wash some clothes only to find the kitchen floor flooded with waste water from the washing machine as the rat or mouse or whatever it is had gnawed through the grey plastic waste pipe from the washing machine in various places so now my washing machine is either going to have to be replaced or i am going to have to do a repair job on it myself by replacing the waste pipe as there is no fucking way i am buying another when this machine is perfectly good.Its not an easy repair to do because of the way that the waste pipe is attached to the machine.I had to stop the machine halfway through its washing cycle so all of my clothes are still inside it.

Its just aggravation i really dont need and its going to mean taking a day off work which i would rather not do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 July, 2010, 02:15:12 PM
Lost a days work but fixed the washing machine and cleaned up the mess.I have blocked the mouse/rats access to the washing machine with tinfoil which they cant nibble through.

All because Cat brings the mouse to the door and plays with it and when i open the door the mouse runs into the house except this mouse ran into the kitchen before i could catch it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 July, 2010, 02:22:39 PM
Tinfoil - it's not just for hats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 July, 2010, 03:08:08 PM
Java. It just never fucking works.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 26 July, 2010, 03:29:27 PM
Re tinfoil, how does that work? Cant they just take a run-up, and bash through it, like the daleks did at the end of 'destiny of the daleks' part one?
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 26 July, 2010, 03:38:37 PM
The performace of Mock THe Week I was due to attend has been cancelled

Mind you re booked for the 21st Sept when I made a phone call.

And managed to make special arrangments for one of my friends....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 July, 2010, 03:50:39 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 26 July, 2010, 03:29:27 PM
Re tinfoil, how does that work? Cant they just take a run-up, and bash through it, like the daleks did at the end of 'destiny of the daleks' part one?
SBT


The tinfoil is scrunched up and packed really tight into the hole it was using as access.Also they dont like the feel of tinfoil against their teeth so it stops them gnawing away at it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 26 July, 2010, 04:39:00 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 26 July, 2010, 03:50:39 PM


The tinfoil is scrunched up and packed really tight into the hole it was using as access.Also they dont like the feel of tinfoil against their teeth so it stops them gnawing away at it.

I did not know that, and it will come in useful at some point I am sure. I had a rat in me kitchen 20 years ago, in bedsit land. A man with an impenetrable Scottish accent came round, put poison down, said something that made no sense and came back a week later to dispose of the body. From first visit to last, I had no idea what he said at any time.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 July, 2010, 04:41:19 PM
Both pineapples were bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 26 July, 2010, 07:08:41 PM
These ants are erupting from my wall:
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4150/4830803677_f60cd0c036_m.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 July, 2010, 07:36:09 PM
This forum has suddenly been blocked at work. Some sites (like facebook and youtube) are always blocked, some are a bit random (blogs for example), but 2000adonline has always been fine. I often have it open in the background for a quick browse if things are quiet between calls, but on Saturday I clicked refresh and it had suddenly found it's way on to the banned list.

Been dreading a bollocking all day for breach of IT policy or somesuch, but nothing else seems to have come of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 July, 2010, 08:54:11 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 26 July, 2010, 07:08:41 PM
These ants are erupting from my wall:

More flying ants?? That's two lots in your neighbourhood, a week apart. I'm still waiting to see if any more hatch in Cardiff this year, or if that's our lot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 26 July, 2010, 09:20:52 PM
Flying ants? Flippi neck.

I get the Luas to and from work in Dublin and every day when I sit down on it I end up with ants crawling all over me. Either there is an infestation on the Luas and they are inside the seats, or they are seeping from my body in place of sweat...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 July, 2010, 09:28:05 PM
Quote from: Van Dom on 26 July, 2010, 09:20:52 PM
I get the Luas to and from work in Dublin and every day when I sit down on it I end up with ants crawling all over me. Either there is an infestation on the Luas and they are inside the seats, or they are seeping from my body in place of sweat...

Red or Green line? 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 26 July, 2010, 09:40:54 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 26 July, 2010, 08:54:11 PM
More flying ants??I'm still waiting to see if any more hatch in Cardiff this year, or if that's our lot.

Better call Torchwood. They might be alien flying ants.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 July, 2010, 12:18:27 AM
I bought a copy of Casino Royale on DVD for a quid and it looked to be perfect.I was really looking forward to watching it just now but the DVD player just rejects it .

MFPOFSC !!!  >:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 27 July, 2010, 12:51:43 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 24 July, 2010, 01:34:05 AM
I got my classic Doctor Who silver nemesis Cyberleader and Cyberman today and had to send them back because they were defective. but from what I did see they were very accurate and not just a re-releases of the earth shock Cybermen these ones are 100% new moulds so I can't wait till the replacements turn up thro the post. (http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/1885/silvernemesis.jpg)

They look amazing Cyberleader2000
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 July, 2010, 12:58:08 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 July, 2010, 12:18:27 AM
I bought a copy of Casino Royale on DVD for a quid and it looked to be perfect.I was really looking forward to watching it just now but the DVD player just rejects it .

MFPOFSC !!!  >:( >:(

It happens. You may have some luck if you try it in a different DVD player. Try it in your computer for one thing. I got a DVD at Christmas that wouldn't play until I put it in the side of a flat screen DVD TV.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 27 July, 2010, 12:37:19 PM
What does MFPOFSC mean?

Anyway, I'm off on a week's holiday. But I spent all of Saturday, some of Sunday (my son's christening) and half of yesterday on the phone.

And I need to go to a meeting at 3pm today!

I'll get the time back, but it's hard to explain to the children.

OH, and I watched the Clash of the Titans remake this morning. But, applying my patneted Godzilla scale, I thought it was jolly good stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 July, 2010, 02:00:32 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 27 July, 2010, 12:37:19 PM
What does MFPOFSC mean?

I've been wondering that myself - my best guess is Mother Funting Piece Of Funting Shit ... but the last C has me stumped!

My own minor hasssle above has been resolved - the site is now available again at work, so all is well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 27 July, 2010, 02:09:16 PM
I just invested in some magazine boxes in order to tidy the piles of progs and megs on my desk and I cannot find Meg 298 anywhere at the moment. Got the GN but not the meg. Maybe I'll find it when doing the progs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 27 July, 2010, 02:20:15 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 27 July, 2010, 02:00:32 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 27 July, 2010, 12:37:19 PM
What does MFPOFSC mean?

I've been wondering that myself - my best guess is Mother Funting Piece Of Funting Shit ... but the last C has me stumped!

Yup, the final C is my stumbling block.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 July, 2010, 08:55:28 PM
K cider.

I bought one can out of curiosity and against my better judgement but my God that was the most spectacularly revoltingly vile drink i have ever tasted.First of all it tasted like Dr Peppers or something cherry flavored but then the taste of it changed to being very bitter rather like something that is completely laced with chemicals and sweeteners and god knows what else.Plus it has left a ligering bitter aftertaste.It smelt chemically as soon as i opened the can.

I had one small taste with a certain amount of reluctunce and trepidation and poured the rest down the plughole.

Yeeuucchh.

:sick:

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 July, 2010, 09:07:08 PM
I put all of my washing into one bundle, enveloped by my bed linen. I carried it down the stairs like a tumescent child in swaddling cumstains. This fresh girth was compliant with my own, making my ascent most precarious as I could not see far ahead.

Also I may not cast an eye over my hotmail account.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 July, 2010, 10:00:20 PM
Did you fall down the stairs then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 July, 2010, 10:04:04 PM
No. I only fall down the stairs when I do that roleplay with your mom where my head "accidentally" falls into her crotch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 27 July, 2010, 10:16:12 PM
What sort of roleplay scenario is this?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 July, 2010, 11:12:37 PM
I'm Robin Askwith in "Confessions of a Freelance Solipsist".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 28 July, 2010, 08:23:40 PM
Finding that 30 years years worth of progs stored at my parents house had been moved resulting in 300 issues being stacked spine first, resulting in them now being an "S" shape due to the weight of oall the others on top of 'em and 60 issues from around prog 300 having fallen prey to a mild case of damp!


On the plus side,during the subsequent frantic checking of the progs i did find the original script for "Death Aid" which Garth Ennis kindly gave me, so a little bit of a silver lining.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 28 July, 2010, 08:59:01 PM
One of the incidental benefits of my mother's second divorce was that I had to collect all my wordly goods from the family home and lug them around a succession of rental properties for six years, thus putting responsibility for their preservation squarely on my shoulders. The divorce was something of a mixed blessing for my mother too, I might add. I haven't lost sight of that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 28 July, 2010, 11:05:04 PM
I haven't posted for some time, what with being so busy. But being busy doesn't mean making much money – I am totally skint. Desperately waiting to get paid for some work I've been doing to clear the overdraft.

So I was not too pleased to receive a letter asking for supplementary service costs from the management group of the block we live in – all because some tight ****** landlord refuses to pay his service charges!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 28 July, 2010, 11:07:59 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 28 July, 2010, 11:05:04 PM

So I was not too pleased to receive a letter asking for supplementary service costs from the management group of the block we live in – all because some tight ****** landlord refuses to pay his service charges!


Time for...BLOCK WAR.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 29 July, 2010, 01:16:07 PM
Quote from: The Doctor Alt 8 on 27 July, 2010, 12:51:43 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 24 July, 2010, 01:34:05 AM
I got my classic Doctor Who silver nemesis Cyberleader and Cyberman today and had to send them back because they were defective. but from what I did see they were very accurate and not just a re-releases of the earth shock Cybermen these ones are 100% new moulds so I can't wait till the replacements turn up thro the post. (http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/1885/silvernemesis.jpg)

They look amazing Cyberleader2000

you shoud see the figeres in person I will say this there new series figeres are poor but the classics are arsom.

now on to anouther problem it was such a nice day yesterday I decided to walk home insted of takeing the bus but when I got home I took off my sandles and my feet heret on clouser inspechion I have warn a lot of skin off my big toes stupid sandles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 29 July, 2010, 04:36:41 PM
Our gas has been cut off so we don't explode.
A few weeks ago we had a routine inspection and were told there was a slight drop in pressure but it was within safe limits and the occasional smell of gas was OK. (Sounded odd to me at the time but hey I'm no gas expert).

Today another guy came to upgrade the meter and said that there is a leak and any drop of pressure is unacceptable and is unsafe.

Salad or microwave for tea tonight then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 July, 2010, 05:10:51 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 26 July, 2010, 04:39:00 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 26 July, 2010, 03:50:39 PM


The tinfoil is scrunched up and packed really tight into the hole it was using as access.Also they dont like the feel of tinfoil against their teeth so it stops them gnawing away at it.

I did not know that, and it will come in useful at some point I am sure. I had a rat in me kitchen 20 years ago, in bedsit land. A man with an impenetrable Scottish accent came round, put poison down, said something that made no sense and came back a week later to dispose of the body. From first visit to last, I had no idea what he said at any time.

SBT

The advice about tinfoil is complete rubbish as the mouse has eaten through it.I was given the advice about tinfoil from someone else and took their word for it.

There is always someone talking rubbish and spreading disinformation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 29 July, 2010, 06:07:21 PM
I had real problems with mice for a couple of years.

However, for the last four or so years I've used rockwool to guard against mice, with 100% results. You get it in B&Q alongside the sandpaper. It's horrible stuff - like thousands of wire filaments. This digs into mice and cuts their gums, so they eff off. Wear thick gardening gloves when you use it - and tear it into strips, then pack it in the holes.

You need to block all holes - if a mouse is used to coming to one place and finds its way blocked then it will look for other access points. As I was told: "if you found your kitchen door was blocked, you wouldn't look for another kitchen would you?"

Bear in mind, though, that you need to kill every mouse already inside. There's a stat somewhere that says for every mouse you see, there are around five others.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 July, 2010, 06:21:32 PM
Invisible mice! FANTASTIC!!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 July, 2010, 08:34:27 PM
Apparently when my wife told me that she wanted it in frequently, she actually meant it as one word and not two  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: dangermouse3597 on 29 July, 2010, 08:48:58 PM
Quote from: albion83uk on 29 July, 2010, 04:36:41 PM
Our gas has been cut off so we don't explode.
A few weeks ago we had a routine inspection and were told there was a slight drop in pressure but it was within safe limits and the occasional smell of gas was OK. (Sounded odd to me at the time but hey I'm no gas expert).

Today another guy came to upgrade the meter and said that there is a leak and any drop of pressure is unacceptable and is unsafe.

Salad or microwave for tea tonight then.
If there is a smell of gas along with the pressure drop it is Immediately Dangerous and needs to be shut off but if there was a drop of less than 4 mBar with no smell that is acceptable. Well this is true in the UK, I'm a gas service engineer so know of what I speak.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 31 July, 2010, 12:01:25 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 29 July, 2010, 06:07:21 PM
I had real problems with mice for a couple of years.

However, for the last four or so years I've used rockwool to guard against mice, with 100% results. You get it in B&Q alongside the sandpaper. It's horrible stuff - like thousands of wire filaments. This digs into mice and cuts their gums, so they eff off. Wear thick gardening gloves when you use it - and tear it into strips, then pack it in the holes.

You need to block all holes - if a mouse is used to coming to one place and finds its way blocked then it will look for other access points. As I was told: "if you found your kitchen door was blocked, you wouldn't look for another kitchen would you?"

Bear in mind, though, that you need to kill every mouse already inside. There's a stat somewhere that says for every mouse you see, there are around five others.

Thanks for the advice about Rockwool as it makes perfect sense and i have plenty of experience with Rockwool.

Of course this problem causes a chain reaction with more annoyances.One being the pipe clip close to the floor is broken causing the water pipe to make a clunking sound when its turned on and of course this is going to be a pain in the arse to fix.How did it break anyway ??

And of course now just as soon as i open my mouth and say i wont replace the machine because there is nothing wrong with it now after doing another wash last night the fucking door will not open for no apparent reason so my clothes are once again stuck inside the machine.This could be a problem and whichever way its going to cost money.

The universe is perverse sometimes because if you say something or talk about something it happens because its like tempting fate but this always happens with negative things and hardly ever with positive things.

I might try reversing this idea and start saying out loud positive things and how they will never happen to see if it tricks the universal cosmic forces into making them happen.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 01 August, 2010, 12:08:06 AM
online opticians >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 01 August, 2010, 12:22:46 AM
I've been convinced I was getting tinnitus as I was hearing an annoying high pitched tone (long squeaking) in my left ear. The I got to think, it started only a few days ago and I got a new computer at the weekend, plus the squeak is only when I'm sitting next to the computer (it is on my lefthand side). So I narrowed it down - it squeaks when it is made to work hard (like playing Quake - one of the tests I've been using) and weirdly when I scroll down a page by grabbing the scroll bar (but not when using the mouse wheel).

Some searching found this thread:

http://www.tomshardware.co.uk/forum/254618-10-making-squealing-noise-mouse-scrolling-help

Fiddling around with some suggestions didn't help (smooth scrolling is difficult to switch off in Vista) but I managed to find a way to turn off the internal speaker and bingo!!

http://www.computerhope.com/issues/ch000725.htm

Wasted hours on it though and spent days being annoyed and wondering if my hearing was going (can't blame it as I've done some terrible things to it but still...).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 August, 2010, 08:33:04 PM
My brother's computer was right there and I didn't hijack his facebook.  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 01 August, 2010, 08:49:53 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 01 August, 2010, 08:33:04 PM
My brother's computer was right there and I didn't hijack his facebook.  ::)
You missed the chance for hilarious status based hijinks. You're losing your touch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 August, 2010, 03:25:01 AM
My stupid neighbours decided it was alright to play really loud classical music at 3.00 in the morning so i had to put a stop to it.When i knocked really loud on the door some foreign idiot wouldnt open the door and she was yabbering away in some foreign language so i had to raise my voice and tell her to turn it down and after 3 more attempts at this and with more knocking on the door she finally got the message.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 August, 2010, 03:27:03 AM
It's probably not 03:00 in her country Peter  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 August, 2010, 09:17:15 AM
An elderly friend of my mothers had ordered a new bed and I went over to take her old one apart and get it down stairs so it could be collected.

After I had it all in bits I noticed what I thought was a small sea shell lying on the floor where the bed had been, I bent over and picked it up only to realise that it wasn't a sea shell at all, it was a whole big toe nail complete with bit's of fleshy matter stuck to it  :sick:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 02 August, 2010, 09:29:25 AM
I preordered a slew of GNs from Amazon, paced out for delivery over June-Sept, which have now, due to delays and wrong issue dates being given, decided to turn up all at once.

My bank account is funned for the month and my teetering backlog of books grows.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 02 August, 2010, 11:50:09 AM
I'm going back to work tomorrow after a week and a day off.

ANd I didn't do anything I planned to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 August, 2010, 10:45:48 PM
Tonight the neighbours have gone out and a digital alarm clock was going off at full volume.Their windows were open upstairs and luckily i had a ladder available and so i was able to climb into their upstairs bedroom and turn it off which has done wonders for my stress levels.

:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 August, 2010, 01:18:21 AM
My queries are running very slowly due to poorly thought out indexing. However, I'm now up to 52 consecutive wins on Freecell.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 03 August, 2010, 01:43:03 AM
I went for a long walk wearing new shoes that had yet to be broken in. I had a blister with blood in it by the time I got back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 03 August, 2010, 02:11:20 AM
I drank too much coffee and anticipate I shall be awake for quite some time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 August, 2010, 02:12:25 AM
I think I'm starting to get arthritis in the elbow I broke when I was a kid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 03 August, 2010, 10:16:34 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 02 August, 2010, 10:45:48 PM
Tonight the neighbours have gone out and a digital alarm clock was going off at full volume.Their windows were open upstairs and luckily i had a ladder available and so i was able to climb into their upstairs bedroom and turn it off which has done wonders for my stress levels.

:D

I hope you washed the fork and put it back after eating your pot noodle this time.

You are lucky your stalker who hangs out in your garden didn't see you and call the rozzers!

You do brighten my days with your unusual life Mr Wolf. I would never, ever have thought of climbing in an upstairs window to silence someone else's alarm clock. And if I had thought of it I would never have had the balls to do it!


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 03 August, 2010, 10:39:46 AM
I fell off a bicycle on Saturday and dislocated my shoulder. Not quite serious enough to go in the life spugs thread, but bugger me it hurts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 August, 2010, 04:20:34 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 02 August, 2010, 10:45:48 PM
Tonight the neighbours have gone out and a digital alarm clock was going off at full volume.Their windows were open upstairs and luckily i had a ladder available and so i was able to climb into their upstairs bedroom and turn it off which has done wonders for my stress levels.

How are you with house alarms. Peter?  Like the one that's being going off for 24 hours now, and despite being about 150m away, around a corner and through double glazing is almost loud enough to drown out the homicidal voices in my head.  What's that you say Chip, fire would make the noise stop?  Yes, yes, I see.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 August, 2010, 04:29:37 PM
Some local councils require people with burglar alarms to register a keyholder with them so that unattended alarms can be shut off by a neighbour or relative. Some local police forces also require a similar arrangement, sometimes through the alarm installation company. Some schemes are voluntary, though. Might be worth a 'phone call.

Ouch, Colin. Hope you get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 August, 2010, 06:00:25 PM
Quote from: Minkyboy on 03 August, 2010, 10:16:34 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 02 August, 2010, 10:45:48 PM
Tonight the neighbours have gone out and a digital alarm clock was going off at full volume.Their windows were open upstairs and luckily i had a ladder available and so i was able to climb into their upstairs bedroom and turn it off which has done wonders for my stress levels.

:D

I hope you washed the fork and put it back after eating your pot noodle this time.

You are lucky your stalker who hangs out in your garden didn't see you and call the rozzers!

You do brighten my days with your unusual life Mr Wolf. I would never, ever have thought of climbing in an upstairs window to silence someone else's alarm clock. And if I had thought of it I would never have had the balls to do it!




I climbed up with the intention of just closing their window or both windows as they were wide open and climbing inside to turn off the alarm clock was an afterthought.I was only in there for 30 seconds.They obviously dont realise what has happened but i thought if they did they can sue me for all i care but i could not listen to that BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP at full volume for any longer as i was starting to become stressed.

I have a set of ladders in the yard that i have borrowed from the neighbours but this is why they are always locked up as left unlocked apart from the fact if they are stolen i would have to replace them they present a security risk for others but i am glad i had them around.


Quote from: TordelBack on 03 August, 2010, 04:20:34 PM


How are you with house alarms. Peter?  Like the one that's being going off for 24 hours now, and despite being about 150m away, around a corner and through double glazing is almost loud enough to drown out the homicidal voices in my head.  What's that you say Chip, fire would make the noise stop?  Yes, yes, I see.

If it had gone on for that long i would have gone spare but again if i had a set of ladders i would climed up and removed the plastic cover of the alarm which are always removeable and disabled/silenced it.Just cut a wire inside is the easiest way.

Other than that i would have informed the police about it early on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 August, 2010, 09:27:04 PM
A recent audit has revealed I have something like 150 GNs/TPBs/collections. That's too many really, but there's still more I want to buy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 August, 2010, 09:45:34 PM
I am a complete fucking gobshite.  More of a major impediment, if I'm honest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 05 August, 2010, 09:33:21 AM
You had me fooled TB - thanks for coming clean.

What's the wiggins?

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 August, 2010, 09:12:35 PM
I bit my cheek while I was eating dinner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 05 August, 2010, 09:43:23 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 05 August, 2010, 09:12:35 PM
I bit my cheek while I was eating dinner.


are you saying cheek was dinner?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 05 August, 2010, 09:44:12 PM
I just had to tell some kids to piss off and play footie elsewhere...for the 3rd night running. Honestly, if your small kids are out at this time of night, your a bit of a shite parent, IMO.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 August, 2010, 12:49:52 AM
Who the fuck is still buying Weezer albums?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 August, 2010, 07:23:01 AM
Quote from: Garageman on 05 August, 2010, 09:43:23 PM
are you saying cheek was dinner?

That's the best bit.

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 August, 2010, 12:49:52 AM
Who the fuck is still buying Weezer albums?

It's not me. Is it Katie Puckrik?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: LARF on 06 August, 2010, 08:16:44 AM
(http://img.youtube.com/vi/C171Pbfj2Yc/0.jpg)

Maybe, check her bookshelf
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 August, 2010, 08:22:13 AM
Quote from: LARF on 06 August, 2010, 08:16:44 AM
Maybe, check her bookshelf

To paraphrase my sig, it's a fine line between pixie and goblin, and Katie Puckrik...etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 August, 2010, 08:24:12 AM
Quote from: LARF on 06 August, 2010, 08:16:44 AM
check her bookshelf

Don't mind if I do...  :P

Quote from: TordelBack on 06 August, 2010, 08:22:13 AM
To paraphrase my sig, it's a fine line between pixie and goblin, and Katie Puckrik...etc.

Aww, d'you think so? i think she's cute.


But one of my favourite pixified women off the telly ever is...

(http://www.free-press-release.com/members/members_pic/200907/img/1248797698.jpg)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 06 August, 2010, 09:32:50 AM
Yeah - Katie Puckrik is (was?) a sweetie!

My minor impediment is that my muse has left me alone for the last two days.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 06 August, 2010, 10:30:37 AM
Yeah, I used to like her too- is she still alive?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 August, 2010, 11:07:58 AM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 06 August, 2010, 10:30:37 AM
Yeah, I used to like her too- is she still alive?

The computer says yes. She left Britain after 16 years and went to live in Hollywood. She writes columns for newspapers, and reviews perfume on Youtube.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 06 August, 2010, 11:08:43 AM
Quoteand reviews perfume on Youtube

Oh dear god.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 August, 2010, 11:38:15 AM
Someone has to review perfume.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 August, 2010, 04:38:21 PM
Katie Puckrik was definitely in the odd-but-yes-please category.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 August, 2010, 05:07:52 PM
I used to know a Katie Puckrik lookalike years ago.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Lady Festina on 06 August, 2010, 05:16:30 PM
Very very minor indeed but....

I would like the weekend to start NOW but I have to wait for a delivery here at work. Can't leave til it arrives.

Bah humbug.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 06 August, 2010, 10:49:31 PM
My weekend starts when I finish work on Saturday evening and ends when I get up for work on Monday morning. Six day working weeks don't you just love em.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 07 August, 2010, 01:41:59 PM
Looked to see what my credit limit is on a long dormant card.

Been a while so I don't remember my login and password for the site.

One of the must answer login reset questions: What is your current credit limit?

Ah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 07 August, 2010, 01:57:34 PM
I have a pesky headcold. Still not as bad as a 6-day week, though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 August, 2010, 02:13:01 PM
Hot water has gone off again. Probably an air lock in the system. Cue very large man crawling inside very small loft space to bleed the valves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 07 August, 2010, 02:31:18 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 07 August, 2010, 02:13:01 PM
Hot water has gone off again. Probably an air lock in the system. Cue very large man crawling inside very small loft space to bleed the valves.

That sounds most irregular.

What kind of heating/hot water system do you have that means you have to bleed the valves in the attic ?

I still have to get the washing machine sorted out which means calling round a technician to fix it.Because they are something i know very little about i am open to a certain amount of exploitation when all i want is a no bullshit assessment and costing of it before i commit to any one company.I need to shop around and find a company that doesnt charge for callouts because like any other business it has its share of cowboys.

I might try Check A Trade and ask around before i choose a particular company or check with the manufacturer of the machine who probably will recommend a company to use in this area.Thats probably the best course of action.

Having said that i am the last person anyone would want to rip off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 August, 2010, 03:26:20 PM
Why do motorcyclists seem to think that speed restrictions dont apply to them ??

That and their riding which quite often constitutes reckless endangerment.

I am sick of them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 August, 2010, 06:33:30 PM
My brother has bought Stanley blades in bulk.

That shitty fucking "Billionaire" song exists.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 08 August, 2010, 06:58:59 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 08 August, 2010, 06:33:30 PM
My brother has bought Stanley blades in bulk.

That's worrying. Mine had a knuckle-duster.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 August, 2010, 07:50:21 PM
Board Brother Rumble imminent!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 August, 2010, 09:04:43 PM
Really attrocious sound quality on two of the records i bought the other day.Even if records look like they havent been played much and arent scratched you cant really tell what they sound like without listening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 August, 2010, 10:36:19 PM
Dropped a deuce and the later movements were noticeably paler than at the start.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 August, 2010, 08:02:24 AM
...it's just been on the news that the Sussex Police helicopter team will use Twitter to 'update about their missions' so the public can 'follow them'.
Im not sure why this causes me to long for the death of civilisation, but it does.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 09 August, 2010, 01:23:09 PM
Had a row with my girlfriend and to patch things up I had to take her to see the Tom Cruise/Cameron Diaz film Knight & Day last night. And part of the deal was I wasn't allowed to criticise the film or moan about it.

Being a film snob, I rarely ever watch anything that I don't want to - especially in the cinema - so I was dreading it. I had to grit my teeth handing over the £16 for the tickets!

It wasn't as awful as I was expecting, but I wouldn't recommend it and it's not how I'd normally choose to spend a Sunday evening. But my girlfriend enjoyed it, so that made it worthwhile at least.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 August, 2010, 02:26:14 PM
I was counting how many Pound coins I had in my wallet and one fell out of my hands and into a drain.

I now only have 3 pound coins in my wallet.

Here is my current wallet inventory:

1 x £20 note (2006, Adam Smith)
1 x £5 note (Unknown, Elizabeth Fry)
3 x £1 coin (2 x 1983, 1 x 1985)
2 x 20 pence coin (2000, 2008)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 August, 2010, 02:36:10 PM
But we don't know the date of the one that fell in the drain! What the hell are we supposed to do with incomplete data like this? Useless!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 August, 2010, 02:40:30 PM
So I guess you're one of my 5 ignored by's then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 09 August, 2010, 03:26:14 PM
Missed most of Paths of Glory on TCM when it was on over the weekend.

But Total Recall is on ITV 1 tonight so it's blasto fest gore-athon with beer [Theakstons Old Peculiar] and crisps. Yes they are Thai sweet chilli! :)


If only they re made Blakes 7 as a Total Recall rip off. Oh, the mind of the uber nerd is upon me!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 09 August, 2010, 03:37:18 PM
I need something to put blackberries in when I go picking and something to store whatever I make from them in the drinks line of things.... *makes plans*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 09 August, 2010, 03:54:59 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 09 August, 2010, 03:37:18 PM
I need something to put blackberries in when I go picking and something to store whatever I make from them in the drinks line of things.... *makes plans*

Jam Jar?

Your stomach?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 August, 2010, 04:55:34 PM
I've been tricked into driving the family and friends down to Brighton next Saturday in a 15 seater minibus.
Joy of joys  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 August, 2010, 05:02:12 PM
The Heck Trek?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 09 August, 2010, 09:06:07 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 09 August, 2010, 03:37:18 PM
I need something to put blackberries in when I go picking and something to store whatever I make from them in the drinks line of things.... *makes plans*
Child's plastic bucket tied round the waist with string. Worked for me when I was eight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2010, 01:41:58 AM
http://nymag.com/daily/entertainment/2010/08/weezers_new_album_hurley_actua.html
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 10 August, 2010, 12:37:47 PM
QuoteWhy do motorcyclists seem to think that speed restrictions dont apply to them ??

That'd be SOME motorcyclists.

As for the hot water problems - it's sorted now.  We live in quite an old cottage (1825) and I think most of the plumbing originates from then as well.  There are a couple of pumps in the loft to get hot water from the downstairs boiler uop into the tank and when we get the occassional air lock, it's nearly always the pump in the attioc (not the easily accessible one next to the boiler) that needs a wee bit of a drain.  Not sure how the air gets into the system though...   Is anybody still awake and reading this.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 August, 2010, 02:38:27 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 10 August, 2010, 12:37:47 PM
QuoteWhy do motorcyclists seem to think that speed restrictions dont apply to them ??

That'd be SOME motorcyclists.

As for the hot water problems - it's sorted now.  We live in quite an old cottage (1825) and I think most of the plumbing originates from then as well.  There are a couple of pumps in the loft to get hot water from the downstairs boiler uop into the tank and when we get the occassional air lock, it's nearly always the pump in the attioc (not the easily accessible one next to the boiler) that needs a wee bit of a drain.  Not sure how the air gets into the system though...   Is anybody still awake and reading this.



I have seen that kind of set up once or twice but i have no idea how air gets in the system at all as plumbing is something i know nothing about.

I was rained off work today which as all the work i have lined up is outside i am pretty certain that i will lose a lot more worktime because of weather.Luckily it is paying very well so the odd day here and there doesnt matter but everyday lost is a day wasted as i wanted to have all this work completed by mid October at the latest because if it isnt then its a problem.I have one other job that i havent had confirmed yet and at this rate if they want my services then its not likely i can do it until the spring but then if i say i cant do it until then i might lose the work altogether.The majority of the summer was wasted as i was waiting for the go ahead on these projects as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 August, 2010, 01:05:33 AM
It looks like Queen Latifah is gay. There goes my chance. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 August, 2010, 09:53:11 AM
I would have really appreciated Pepsi, Coca Cola and 7Up stating clearly that the drink in the can contains High Fructose Corn Syrup as well as sugar.I only found out that this is the case the other day as i had already read up on HFCS and its seriously unhealthy and its annoying because i usually drink a can of Coke [non-diet] in the morning just for the caffeine and sugar content as i dont really drink coffee or tea as i dont really like hot drinks.

>:( >:(

I am sick and tired of all this chemical unhealthy filth in food and drink as i have to check the ingredients of everything i eat or drink and then if i do check the ingredients its not even F-ing included in the list of ingredients which is totally dishonest and deceptive.

This is just one example and its not like you can rely on govt agencies to safeguard against unhealthy substances in food and drink as they do NOTHING about it.

Another example is Aspartame.I dont chew gum but you try finding chewing gum that doesnt contain Aspartame.

I dont even know with absolute certainty that the tap water here doesnt contain Fluoride and god knows how many other toxic substances.

HI HO its off to work i go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 13 August, 2010, 10:49:26 AM
My phone is dying so I need to get a new one soon.
Not getting a touch screen phone again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 11:14:25 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 11 August, 2010, 09:53:11 AM
Another example is Aspartame.

I dont even know with absolute certainty that the tap water here doesnt contain Fluoride and god knows how many other toxic substances.

I don't trust aspartame. I never knowingly eat or drink anything containing aspartame, saccharine or acesulfame potassium, because I don't know what the the health effects are or any of them. At least with sugar I know it can cause tooth decay, diabetes and coronary heart disease. The answer to that is to try to minimise your consumption of sugar rather than to add chemicals into your diet. I still eat too much sugar, but I don't add it to tea or coffee or sprinkle it on my cereal, and I generally halve the amount specified in recipes, such as when baking cakes.

If you are worried about fluoride in your water supply, it should be relatively easy to find out from your water company or Health Trust if fluoride is deliberately added. To the best of my knowledge they don't add fluoride to the water supply in East Sussex.

Edit: The British Dental Health Foundation says it's only added to water in the west Midlands and the north east.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: zombemybabynow on 13 August, 2010, 11:22:38 AM
Quotefluoride in your water supply

MIND CONTROL!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 August, 2010, 11:33:58 AM
Quote from: Inev on 13 August, 2010, 10:49:26 AM
My phone is dying so I need to get a new one soon.
Not getting a touch screen phone again.

Sensible chap! I got a LG cookie recently 'cos it had a better camera than other phones in the same price range, but it's been a pain in the arse ever since. Next time I'm going for one with buttons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 13 August, 2010, 11:44:50 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 13 August, 2010, 11:33:58 AM
Sensible chap! I got a LG cookie recently 'cos it had a better camera than other phones in the same price range, but it's been a pain in the arse ever since. Next time I'm going for one with buttons.
That's the phone I've got. It's alright to start with but now it's sending blank texts left, right and centre and generally pisses me off.
I've probably had it over a year now. But I wouldn't recommend it to anyone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 August, 2010, 11:49:50 AM
yeah, mine kept unlocking in my pocket and randomly dialling people in my address book. I managed to lock myself out completely fiddling about trying to set the pin code. I've now got it unlocked and worked out how to do this, but it takes about 6 steps to lock or unlock it securely. Even the camera's not great, as that takes several menu and sub-menu steps before you can take a picture, and again before you take the next one.

The only thing I realy do like about it is the way it changes to a QWERTY keyboard if you turn it sideways.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 13 August, 2010, 11:53:59 AM
I don't like it however when it turns to the QWERTY keyboard whilst I am holding it upright and trying to text.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 13 August, 2010, 01:23:58 PM
Thanks for the suggestions. My stomach is certainly somewhere i shall be storing some of the berries. I love the idea of kids buckets - they'd make great plant pots too. :)

Oh look it's raining.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 02:04:33 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 11:14:25 AM


If you are worried about fluoride in your water supply, it should be relatively easy to find out from your water company or Health Trust if fluoride is deliberately added. To the best of my knowledge they don't add fluoride to the water supply in East Sussex.

Edit: The British Dental Health Foundation says it's only added to water in the west Midlands and the north east.

Thats reassuring to a certain extent as i dont require to be chemically coshed especially without my informed consent or knowledge.As for Aspartame there is plenty of info online about the effects of Aspartame and none of the effects are good especially mental retardation.The only time i have ever touched Aspartame was when i bought the wrong can of drink by mistake.I didnt swallow any as the taste of it was a giveaway that it didnt contain sugar so i spat it out as it tasted vile.

Also High Fructose[its actually glucose] Corn Syrup is what is being blamed on the rising rates of Diabetes/Coronary heart disease/High blood pressure/Obesity and Pancreatic cancer and is far worse for you than sugar is in any amount.

:sick:



Talking of baking cakes Bicarbonate Of Soda is a detoxifying agent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 13 August, 2010, 02:53:47 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 02:04:33 PM
Thats reassuring to a certain extent as i dont require to be chemically coshed especially without my informed consent or knowledge.

Ever considered getting some filtration on your drinking water? If you're concerned, domestic reverse osmosis filters are available (I think...yep, they are), combine it with a deionizer and you'd be laughing.

(I used to take deionized water home for peaty malt whiskies!)

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 04:55:04 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 13 August, 2010, 02:53:47 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 02:04:33 PM
Thats reassuring to a certain extent as i dont require to be chemically coshed especially without my informed consent or knowledge.

Ever considered getting some filtration on your drinking water? If you're concerned, domestic reverse osmosis filters are available (I think...yep, they are), combine it with a deionizer and you'd be laughing.

(I used to take deionized water home for peaty malt whiskies!)

M.

I have got a De-Ionizer but i havent bothered to set it up because i cant find the connecting cables.My mum and dads old house had a reverse osmosis filter and you could definately tell the difference.

I just bought a bottle of Volvic Taste of Fruit mineral water but for some reason they dont think i need to know what the actual mineral content of the water is yet the nutritional info on the side of the bottle states that there is 0 percent fat ! [well i never !!]  :lol: and a .1 percent trace of salt.

What these idiots tell you about Fluoride [which is a catch all term that is used to describe any number of harmful additives in water in tap water] and now there is talk of adding Lithium  :o into tapwater in the US is that they are added to the water in tiny tiny amounts so as not to be harmful  :lol: but what they dont tell you is these substances cant be easily flushed out of your system and they are cumilative toxins so its idiotic to say its not harmful in small amounts.They know this of course.

Radiation isnt harmful in tiny tiny controlled amounts but its cumilative.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 05:11:15 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 04:55:04 PM
now there is talk of adding Lithium  :o into tapwater in the US [...] but what they dont tell you is these substances cant be easily flushed out of your system and they are cumilative toxins

That's interesting. My first reaction was to think that sounded far fetched, but a quick google search reveals that this has been tested by adding small doses of lithium to the tap water of a population of 1 million in Japan. However, I don't know who is putting forward any proposals to adopt putting lithium in the water supply in America, and 'they' do tell you that Lithium can be toxic. Sophie Corlett, external relations director of the mental health charity Mind does, anyway.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8025454.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8025454.stm)

I think it is almost certain that eventually we will see drugs added to the water supply to make people easier to control, and that it's something that should be resisted. This was anticipated in several Judge Dredd stories, including Block Mania and the one where some guy found out that tranquiliser gas was added to blocks' ventilation systems to keep the residents calm and docile.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:55:11 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 04:55:04 PM
dont think i need to know what the actual mineral content of the water is yet the nutritional info on the side of the bottle states that there is 0 percent fat ! [well i never !!]  :lol: and a .1 percent trace of salt.

What these idiots tell you about

And another note, that Peanuts CONTAIN NUTS, and milk CONTAINS MILK...Bleeding Nutters are milking it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 05:11:15 PM
I think it is almost certain that eventually we will see drugs added to the water supply to make people easier to control, and that it's something that should be resisted. This was anticipated in several Judge Dredd stories, including Block Mania and the one where some guy found out that tranquiliser gas was added to blocks' ventilation systems to keep the residents calm and docile.

ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 13 August, 2010, 06:25:38 PM
Next door's feral toddlers are in the street playing the screaming game again. What joy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 05:11:15 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 04:55:04 PM
now there is talk of adding Lithium  :o into tapwater in the US [...] but what they dont tell you is these substances cant be easily flushed out of your system and they are cumilative toxins

That's interesting. My first reaction was to think that sounded far fetched, but a quick google search reveals that this has been tested by adding small doses of lithium to the tap water of a population of 1 million in Japan. However, I don't know who is putting forward any proposals to adopt putting lithium in the water supply in America, and 'they' do tell you that Lithium can be toxic. Sophie Corlett, external relations director of the mental health charity Mind does, anyway.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8025454.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8025454.stm)

I think it is almost certain that eventually we will see drugs added to the water supply to make people easier to control, and that it's something that should be resisted. This was anticipated in several Judge Dredd stories, including Block Mania and the one where some guy found out that tranquiliser gas was added to blocks' ventilation systems to keep the residents calm and docile.

You have nailed it there.The arguments for it on the basis of it treating a tiny minority of Bi-Polar or depressive individuals is totally spurious but its what it is being sold on even though its totally absurd.

What happens if you are not Bi-polar or depressive or schizoid ?

Does my forced medication improve their condition and lives in any way whatsoever ??

No it doesnt and apart from that there is individual care and attention for them if they want it provided by the NHS and other alternatives.Someone elses mental health problems arent my problem in the same way that my mental health shouldnt be anyone elses problem and i got over depression with no medication whatsoever.How many suicides are not because of an underlying mental condition ?

I am not accepting it and "they" can stuff their Collectivist forced healthcare/mass forced medication up their appropriate Collectivist orifices.

Whoops.It looks like i need more fluoride  :D !

Professor Allan Young of Vancouver Institute For Mental Health - Large-scale trials involving the addition of lithium to drinking water supplies may then be feasible, although this would undoubtedly be subject to considerable debate. Following up on these findings will not be straightforward or inexpensive, but the eventual benefits for community mental health may be considerable."

These people piss me off.It looks like i need more Happy Pills  :D !!

I want to feel all warm and fuzzy and numb while the planet slides into economic depression and tyranny  :D   !

Its not "feasible" you AssHat because it is unethical but now its being promoted as being ethical by BIG Collectivist Top-Down govt as it is being heavily promoted by Bio-Ethicists and various govt affiliated institutes and much more besides.Its not as if it is not already going on.


Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM


ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?

Its got nothing to do with New Order.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 07:05:26 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM


ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?

Its got nothing to do with New Order.

New World Order maybe?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 08:01:54 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 07:05:26 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM


ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?

Its got nothing to do with New Order.

New World Order maybe?  ;)

Thats probably it but i dont feel i want to go there with @SMOKESCREEN:ED:9.
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 August, 2010, 08:10:49 PM
I always preferred Joy Division anyway...

In other news, I appear to have rendered my mobile phone Russian by flashing it with the wrong firmware. Oops...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 09:00:13 PM
Spammers spamming on a thread that is remembering and paying tribute to a 2000ad artist who had their life cut tragically short by a terminal illness.

How distasteful/disrespectful is that ??  >:(

To add insult to injury they are pimping fake pharmaceutical pills.If only there was someway to keep filth like that out of here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 13 August, 2010, 09:41:04 PM
Been in Brighton half an hour and have yet to see the Legend that is Peter Wolf.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 14 August, 2010, 12:32:52 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 August, 2009, 11:42:44 AM
You can never be too sure that the residue of previous occupying liquids has been fully expunged. Coffee flavoured pencils may sound delicious, but then you keep sucking them and you die of lead poisoning.
There is no actuall lead in a pencil. iam surprised tha an artist hasn't already disabused you of theis fact.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 August, 2010, 12:55:08 PM
My small, terraced house is full of burlesque performers rehearsing in the dining room. To faciliate this, ive had to drag the table into the lounge and tape the lampshade up close to the ceiling, because they are using isis wings.
As a result of this, my youngest son has made the table into a huge pile of action fugures and is currently standing over their prone forms like some mini king kong, and keeps indicating he wants to swing from the front room chandelier.
I have been making tea every half hour and am writing this perched halfway up the stairs, wondering how the hell im going to climb over the three dining chairs, candelabras and bags of junk that have been placed at the foot of the stairs, in order to get my bag and go to work in half an hour.
Knickers!
SBT

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 14 August, 2010, 01:25:52 PM
If you don't want the Burlesque performers, I'll take 'em off your hands.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 14 August, 2010, 01:38:57 PM
how about a live webcam link?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 August, 2010, 03:26:35 PM
Im at work now, so sadly not.

Grud know what theyre doing now. Probably rubbing oil over each other and practicing tassle-twirling or something.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 14 August, 2010, 08:40:52 PM
Oh my. *dabs sweat from brow with a handkerchief*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 14 August, 2010, 09:07:30 PM
Edited because it's just not worth the trouble.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 15 August, 2010, 08:40:32 AM
For crying out loud, I swear I'm not taking a holiday from work ever again, I always come back to find I have been shafted in some way.

My boss has promised a customer that I will be working with them every day at their site until the end of the year, they are right next to Heathrow airport and I live in North Warwickshire. I now have a 5+ hour round trip to work every day.

Bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 August, 2010, 11:55:25 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 15 August, 2010, 08:40:32 AM
My boss has promised a customer that I will be working with them every day at their site until the end of the year

The bastard. How exactly is that supposed to make you feel valued? You ought to be compensated in some way. Bonus? Travel allowance? Temporary relocation expenses? Promotion? If driving isn't part of your job, he's just added 20 hours to your working week. Somebody ought to pay for that, and I don't mean you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2010, 01:55:58 PM
Ever since drinking that bottle of water on Friday i have been feeling tired and nauseous with a headache and after forcing myself to throw up this morning i feel a bit better.I obviously cannot attribute it to drinking a bottle of Volvic but i did drink it very quickly and thats when i started feeling ill.

Quote from: Noisybast on 13 August, 2010, 08:10:49 PM
I always preferred Joy Division anyway...



I watched Control about the life of Ian Curtis the other night and it showed how he was messed up by the cocktail of medication that caused depression perscribed to control Epilepsy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 August, 2010, 02:29:28 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2010, 01:55:58 PM
I watched Control about the life of Ian Curtis the other night and it showed how he was messed up by the cocktail of medication that caused depression perscribed to control Epilepsy.

Is one way of looking at it. There's always the conundrum of whether it's a combination of personality factors and mental illness, or the drugs people are prescribed, that makes them do things they or others may regret later. I have never needed prescribed drugs to make me think about throwing myself off a bridge. I'm not convinced that a course of antidepressants would make it seem like an even better idea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 15 August, 2010, 06:43:01 PM
cyclists en masse... we went to southport today and there was a load of them taking up all the fucking road even at the junction they just went were they felt like.gits
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 15 August, 2010, 07:46:16 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 15 August, 2010, 11:55:25 AM
The bastard. How exactly is that supposed to make you feel valued? You ought to be compensated in some way. Bonus? Travel allowance? Temporary relocation expenses? Promotion? If driving isn't part of your job, he's just added 20 hours to your working week. Somebody ought to pay for that, and I don't mean you.

To be honest, with the huge faceless firm that I work for it's very difficult to feel valued anyway, but it is very easy to work the system to screw as much money out of them as you can when you know your way around all of the policies on overtime and expenses etc, which is exactly what I will be doing as I am a bit of a ninja in that department.

The worst thing about this isn't the way my boss has gone about all this, he hasn't actually told me yet and still thinks I don't know about it and he will be phoning me in the morning to tell me, no the worst part is that I won't get to see much of my kids in the week, especially if I get delayed at all on my way home and as I will be hitting the M25 at rush hour every night there is every chance of that happening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 August, 2010, 08:50:22 PM
Popped my ears when I did not need to and now I have head hurt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 15 August, 2010, 09:21:19 PM
Sore back. I think I must have sneezed in bed or something. Owwwwwwwwwwwwww
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2010, 09:24:31 PM
F-ing UK Nanny-state means i cant bid on/buy a Hunting/Trail knife being sold by a US seller on Ebay.

I shall go to a shop and buy one instead as i will not be deterred.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 August, 2010, 10:38:54 PM
Quote from: King Trout on 14 August, 2010, 09:07:30 PM
Edited because it's just not worth the trouble.
Ah. I did wonder.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 15 August, 2010, 10:49:11 PM
...because I can't find the "Life Sucks" thread. Is it gone? Does life, in general, not suck anymore? Oh well, I guess here will do...

Mini-Dom 3 spent the day in hospital today, after getting a little over-excited while watching a Scooby Doo cartoon this morning. When the ghost appeared on screen he ran over to "slap" it, and hit the tv hard enough to knock off the clock we had on top of it. Clock came down, sharp edge caught him JUST below the eye - I'm talking millimetres- and gouged a deep cut into his flesh. Cue lots of blood and screaming and a mad dash to A&E. Poor little bugger had to get seven stitches. He's only 2. :( This comes a year after his elder brother had a similar accident, slipped and fell against a table and caught the edge of a photo frame with his cheek. They were able to use glue to stick that wound together luckily. Either way, two of my sons will now sport little scars on their faces.... As it happens, I have one too, from an accident I had when I was the same age... History Repeating Sucks!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 August, 2010, 10:51:45 PM
Quote from: Van Dom on 15 August, 2010, 10:49:11 PM
...because I can't find the "Life Sucks" thread. Is it gone? Does life, in general, not suck anymore? Oh well, I guess here will do...



Here it is.
http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,24364.2085.html




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 15 August, 2010, 10:54:05 PM
Mother: "How do you find the album artwork though?"
Me: "You'd Google it" *opens firefox*
Mother: "Is Google better in Firefox?"
Me: *Facepalm*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 August, 2010, 10:58:22 PM
I read about the Tila Tequila/ICP thing, and now I feel compelled to end the blight of humanity.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2010, 11:03:27 PM
Quote from: Inev on 15 August, 2010, 10:54:05 PM
Mother: "How do you find the album artwork though?"
Me: "You'd Google it" *opens firefox*
Mother: "Is Google better in Firefox?"
Me: *Facepalm*

She is right you know....Its much better with Firefox than IE.

Always listen to your parents.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 15 August, 2010, 11:05:46 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 07:05:26 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM


ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?

Its got nothing to do with New Order.

New World Order maybe?  ;)


Nah I'll stick with New order...they really know how to take the Joy out of any Division.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 15 August, 2010, 11:06:56 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 08:01:54 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 07:05:26 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM


ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?

Its got nothing to do with New Order.

New World Order maybe?  ;)

Thats probably it but i dont feel i want to go there with @SMOKESCREEN:ED:9.
.

To be honest I won't go anywhere with a Stranger, Sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2010, 11:46:14 PM
Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 15 August, 2010, 11:06:56 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 08:01:54 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 07:05:26 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 August, 2010, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 13 August, 2010, 05:59:25 PM


ERMMM NewORDER Bullshit?

Its got nothing to do with New Order.

New World Order maybe?  ;)

Thats probably it but i dont feel i want to go there with @SMOKESCREEN:ED:9.
.

To be honest I won't go anywhere with a Stranger, Sorry.

Never take sweets off them either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SMOKESCREEN:ED:9 on 16 August, 2010, 01:46:11 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 15 August, 2010, 11:46:14 PM
[
Never take sweets off them either.

That's a policy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 16 August, 2010, 10:07:45 AM
My mother has lent my brother money.

*facepalm*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 16 August, 2010, 06:30:49 PM
I'm giving up the ciggies (again). Christ but I'm feeling cranky.

Going to actually do it this time though, I'm determined not to be a smoker when I reach 40 in January.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 August, 2010, 08:05:38 PM
I have just realized (again) that I can't afford to celebrate my 40th birthday!  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 August, 2010, 08:11:42 PM
But, can you afford not to?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 16 August, 2010, 08:13:31 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 15 August, 2010, 08:50:22 PM
Popped my ears when I did not need to and now I have head hurt.

Quote from: staticgirl on 15 August, 2010, 09:21:19 PM
Sore back. I think I must have sneezed in bed or something. Owwwwwwwwwwwwww

I suffered quite a nasty yawning accident the other week, now it hurts to yawn - I should get more sleep and not talk to dull people, so I can avoid such a situation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 August, 2010, 12:14:47 PM
All morning i have waited in for this washing machine repair guy to call round to fix the machine
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 August, 2010, 12:18:48 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 August, 2010, 12:14:47 PM
All morning i have waited in for this washing machine repair guy to call round to fix the machine

That's par for the course isn't it? Washing machine repairmen are notorious for it (and for that other thing, come to mention it...).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 August, 2010, 12:23:05 PM

I dont know what happened with the last comment i posted.


All morning i have hung around at home for a washing machine repair guy to call round AS ARRANGED !!

The time now is 12.16 pm which is NOT morning.

I wasnt given a specific time as i was told it would be "Morning" when he was going to call round.

Despite giving him 2 landline nos to call i have had NO call whatsoever.

Thats taking the piss and i am not having it.  >:( >:(

People are fucking useless a lot of the time and i hate relying on anyone but i have no choice as my talents dont stretch to fixing washing machines.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 17 August, 2010, 12:23:52 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 17 August, 2010, 12:18:48 PM
Washing machine repairmen are notorious for it (and for that other thing, come to mention it...)

Better brace yourself, Peter...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 August, 2010, 12:42:56 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 17 August, 2010, 12:23:52 PM
Better brace yourself, Peter...

Pshaw! The guy probably just got delayed making a... short... film... on the way.  :lol:
That's all I was suggesting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 August, 2010, 01:26:15 PM
He finally shows up at 1pm.

Why not call to say you are running late ?

Never mind he has been round and found the problem and its easily repairable with a replacement part.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 August, 2010, 01:30:57 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 August, 2010, 01:26:15 PM
He finally shows up at 1pm.

I think you should count yourself very lucky there Peter!  That's technically 'before lunch', which is a minor miracle in the world of washing machine repair men.  I hope he at least advised you to use Calgon in future, self-defeating though that would be.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 17 August, 2010, 04:13:13 PM
I was lifting floor tiles from the bathroom today with the intention of replacing them with ones the kids couldnt just pull up and....dont ask how...Ive managed to smash my fucking toilet!

MY FUCKING TOILET!

WHERE I SHIT!

AND THERES NOBODY ELSE TO BLAME AS I DID IT!

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 August, 2010, 04:18:58 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 17 August, 2010, 04:13:13 PM
Ive managed to smash my fucking toilet!FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

That's quite a problem. Replacing a toilet isn't difficult, but there's all the shopping and choosing involved, and the problem of what to do in the meantime living in a house without a working one. Good luck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 August, 2010, 04:24:56 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 17 August, 2010, 04:13:13 PM
Ive managed to smash my fucking toilet!

MY FUCKING TOILET!

That's quite a specialist toilet you have there! By the way it has amused Sam reading your swear words, so when he repeats it later I'm gonna be right in the shit  :D
Oh God, he's just started repeating my last sentence  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 17 August, 2010, 05:55:19 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 August, 2010, 04:24:56 PM

That's quite a specialist toilet you have there! By the way it has amused Sam reading your swear words, so when he repeats it later I'm gonna be right in the shit  :D
Oh God, he's just started repeating my last sentence  ::)
Just don't let him read any of Godpleton's posts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 17 August, 2010, 08:36:52 PM
First week of the Fantasy Premier League season.

Guess who left Drogba on the bench.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 20 August, 2010, 11:38:22 AM
Jury duty. Apparently having a holiday booked which you've paid for is a valid reason to be excused but having college lectures you've paid for is not a valid reason. I don't get the logic there at all. Fuckers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 August, 2010, 05:07:11 PM
Odd - i was excused for having a training course booked. Shame as i really wanted to exercise my civic duty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 August, 2010, 08:35:56 PM
Minimum of 60p in 'phone boxes now. It just cost me £1.20 to get absolutely nowhere, calling two "24 hour" numbers that had "The other person is on the 'phone" recorded messages.

No wonder 'phone boxes get smashed up, is it? Society's gone all to bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 August, 2010, 08:47:22 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 August, 2010, 08:35:56 PM
Minimum of 60p in 'phone boxes now. It just cost me £1.20 to get absolutely nowhere, calling two "24 hour" numbers that had "The other person is on the 'phone" recorded messages.

No wonder 'phone boxes get smashed up, is it? Society's gone all to bollocks.

Top Tip :

Years ago I used to call the BT operator to report a fault with the callbox i was calling them from.I used to tell them that the coin slot was blocked and that it swallowed my cash without it paying for the call i was trying to make.I did this quite a few times and i always got credited with a free call by the operator.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 August, 2010, 09:07:40 PM
Hmm, that's not a bad idea...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 20 August, 2010, 09:16:51 PM
Because im at a school reunion, and of the hundred plus people in the bar, i know seven. Including me. Mind you, on the other hand, ive aged better than the rest of them and im at a table with four of my (long time ago) exes, so.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 20 August, 2010, 10:13:39 PM
Did you make up a really cool career that you have? Or claim responsibility for inventing wireless broadband?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 August, 2010, 11:45:50 PM
Went to feed the cat and discovered that a whole bunch of cat food had gone rancid. I'm still getting the smell even after I washed my hands.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 August, 2010, 12:13:51 AM
No, because thanks to what i DO do, the standard response is to shuffle closer, give me a cuddle and tell me how 'rewarding' it must be. So i stick with that! it did, however, turn into a round the table discussion of the wicker man, and now im home i find i need to watch it again, but its far too late. This makes me a bit cross.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 21 August, 2010, 12:28:51 AM
I'm glad you enjoyed yourself.

I couldn't cope with a full-scale school reunion. Too much baggage of failure. I even stopped using Friends Reunited four years ago. I do like the film Romy and Michelle's Highschool Reunion though.

:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 August, 2010, 10:39:16 AM
My prog just landed on my doormat and it looks like a dog chewed it, despite the envelope being in good shape.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 21 August, 2010, 10:39:40 AM
I can think of nothing more pointless or boring than a school reunion.
The people from school I still want to be in contact with are people I still know. If I was interested in the rest of them, then I'd make the effort.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 August, 2010, 11:05:27 AM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 21 August, 2010, 10:39:40 AM
I can think of nothing more pointless or boring than a school reunion.
The people from school I still want to be in contact with are people I still know. If I was interested in the rest of them, then I'd make the effort.

I felt exactly the same way, right up until the first one we had eighteen months ago. I almost didn't go- but I found something quite incredible. In the intervening 25 years, everyone had grown up. As a result, the people there didn't dissolve into cliques, old grudges were forgotten, and everyone seemed to have a great time. I know I did, and as a result, I now have several more people back in my life who should have been there all along.

The one I went to last night was different- in that it was arranged for THREE school years, of which mine was the "middle one". Needless to say, I knew far fewer people there and the net result was a big bar full of people where everyone actually DOES look familiar but you really can't place them. That was quite disconcerting.

But yet again, the top two tables in the room were by the end jammed with people I knew, and there was none of the bitchiness, simmering jealousy and hatred and years-old sexual tension you might expect. Variously we were the long-term unemployed, business owners, nurses, mums, grandmothers, shop workers, Midge Ure and Barbara Dixon's drummer, a local band rock god, programmers, civil servants, divorced, single, married and everything else. Including me. Time flew, it was suddenly midnight, we said our goodbyes, a bunch went on to "the Chavelock", much to everyone else's amusement, and I walked home.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 21 August, 2010, 11:09:40 AM
QuoteIn the intervening 25 years, everyone had grown up.

Mmmm... that's a good point!
Incredible as it may seem there are probably people from my school saying the same thing about me..!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 August, 2010, 12:25:29 AM
My gag reflex is way too trigger happy with bad smells.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 22 August, 2010, 02:10:38 AM
There is a fleck of dirt on the underside of my mobile phone screen. While pondering how I get it out I also waste time on how it got in and which route it could have taken.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 August, 2010, 09:00:46 PM
KFC, Milton Keynes. Somewhat of a less salubrious crowd had coalesced. My unconscious somehow dictates that I stand in an effeminate manner. As much as I can without showing off.

Queuing for the bus. Two sets of people try to pay with notes not coins. There is an arcade across the road with a change machine. When there isn't, go to the corner shop and buy a goddamn fucking freezepop. I expected this from the first set of dolly birds but not from the girl with the boyish haircut. Luckily it later turned out she was actually buying a weekly pass.

I can still marry her.

BTW, Van Der Graff Generator (the band) + bus noises = A winning combination.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 August, 2010, 10:03:36 PM
The nearest ATM to my house got burnt by some miscreants who had clearly not read the second volume of Criminal.

Some of the bread I got from the Co-op that was attached to said cash point tasted of gas.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 August, 2010, 10:16:06 PM
Maybe they were heroic anti-capitalists.

Or maybe they were just drunken hoodies.

Same thing, really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 August, 2010, 11:01:06 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 August, 2010, 09:00:46 PM
My unconscious somehow dictates that I stand in an effeminate manner. As much as I can without showing off.

I say go the whole hog: get yourself a green carnation for your buttonhole.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 23 August, 2010, 11:05:06 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 23 August, 2010, 11:01:06 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 August, 2010, 09:00:46 PM
My unconscious somehow dictates that I stand in an effeminate manner. As much as I can without showing off.

I say go the whole hog: get yourself a green carnation for your buttonhole.

...or feather boa and pink ipod, jampacked with effeminate fairy/prog rock (not that Van der Graff Generator are any such thing).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 August, 2010, 11:18:50 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 August, 2010, 09:00:46 PM
KFC, Milton Keynes. Somewhat of a less salubrious crowd had coalesced.

Thats very typical of KFC.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 August, 2010, 09:01:56 AM
The twat of a taxi driver that lives two doors down decided to jump start one of his decrepit taxis at 3.30 this morning, cue 20 minutes of excessive engine revving and car alarms that woke up my entire family and probably the rest of the street too.

I noticed one of my neighbours has already been round to complain, I'm going round a bit later when I'm in from work, he should be back in bed by then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 August, 2010, 03:21:00 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 24 August, 2010, 09:01:56 AM
The twat of a taxi driver that lives two doors down decided to jump start one of his decrepit taxis at 3.30 this morning, cue 20 minutes of excessive engine revving and car alarms that woke up my entire family and probably the rest of the street too.

I noticed one of my neighbours has already been round to complain, I'm going round a bit later when I'm in from work, he should be back in bed by then.

What is it with Taxidrivers ??

A friend had exactly the same problem with a taxi driver who lived next door who made his life hell so much so that he had to sell up and move house.

The funny thing was that once my friend had moved house the taxi drivers taxi was completely trashed under mysterious circumstances overnight.

:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 August, 2010, 08:01:02 PM
I forgot that the front door out of work is still barred (those Camp Climate protesters) so had to go out the back.

This took an extra five minutes meaning I missed the 1930 from Edinburgh and now won't get home until nearly 2200.

Bollocks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 August, 2010, 08:06:22 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 24 August, 2010, 08:01:02 PM
I forgot that the front door out of work is still barred (those Camp Climate protesters) so had to go out the back.

This took an extra five minutes meaning I missed the 1930 from Edinburgh and now won't get home until nearly 2200.

Bollocks!

Oops. My flatmate's heavily involved with that lot - I'm checking the news regularly to see if he's been arrested!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 August, 2010, 09:20:20 PM
No issue with them as such; my own stupid fault for forgetting).  Though it was thoughtful of them to arrange protests so they could also have a nice weekend at the festival.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 August, 2010, 09:30:53 PM
Yeah I've been taking the piss for weeks suggesting that half of 'em are only going for the cheap camping during the fringe!

He called me Wednesday night asking me to google the location of the RBS HQ and text him back as it was all going off quicker than expected.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 25 August, 2010, 08:52:15 AM
Camp climate protesters? "Ooh, that carbon footprint is so last season, dearie", etc?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 25 August, 2010, 09:08:57 AM
"GLOBAL WAR-MINGe, WELL I NE-VER!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 August, 2010, 10:04:10 AM
A war-minge? Sounds like a fearsome new development in the arms race!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 25 August, 2010, 10:08:02 AM
Heh, a camp affectation, if you please. Then again, it's all Green-peace innit?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 August, 2010, 12:28:44 PM
For some reason they reported on the news this morning that an RBS ATM had been covered in treacle. But that it had been cleaned up.

I'm sure that on Sunday morning there were dozens of ATMs all round the country that were covered in vomit and kebab.  But they never reported those.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 26 August, 2010, 07:32:23 PM
The pile of ironing in the corner of our dining room is now so big that my four year old can climb to the top and slide down it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 26 August, 2010, 07:35:57 PM


Get your four year old to do it then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 August, 2010, 11:04:03 PM
Fucking stupid goth vegetarians who think their disapproval of halal butchery has anything at all to do with a discussion of personal ethical reasons for not eating meat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 August, 2010, 11:22:56 PM
I seem to have Fleas as i am sitting here drawing and i keep feeling them crawling up my leg.I have destroyed 9 so far in various ways including burning them with a lighter flame but i never get bitten by them but this has been going on for a couple of days but i have no idea where they came from.

This weather is a pain as well as its stopping all my work and this week has been a complete dead loss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 August, 2010, 12:12:05 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 24 August, 2010, 08:01:02 PM
I forgot that the front door out of work is still barred (those Camp Climate protesters) so had to go out the back.
I read on the bbc site that people were "being encouraged not to come to work" on Monday because of it. When I was on bloody holiday. I'll not be impressed if I can't claim back a day's annual leave!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 27 August, 2010, 12:51:25 AM
I think it was "encouraged to work from home". We had quite a few Gogarburn refugees in our office and there were a few in Glasgow as well.

But apart from that, how was your holiday?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 August, 2010, 01:25:35 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 27 August, 2010, 12:12:05 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 24 August, 2010, 08:01:02 PM
I forgot that the front door out of work is still barred (those Camp Climate protesters) so had to go out the back.
I read on the bbc site that people were "being encouraged not to come to work" on Monday because of it. When I was on bloody holiday. I'll not be impressed if I can't claim back a day's annual leave!

Monday is a bank holiday.

Anyway hose them all down.

Bloody Vegan Hippy LentilMunchers !
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 27 August, 2010, 08:57:40 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 August, 2010, 01:25:35 AMMonday is a bank holiday.

Maybe not in Scotland though Pete.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 27 August, 2010, 07:18:07 PM
back to work on wednsday :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 August, 2010, 10:52:24 PM
This SLOW speed internet on the Broads has been a killer this last week, thank Grud I'm back home tomorrow so I can really catch up with the forum and other stuff.
I even tried to buy a spare prog whilst here but that was fruitless  ::)
At least I managed to pop round Judge Palmers house for an evening and he and his good lady made the Forces family very welcome.
By the way, Great Yarmouth is NOT great!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 August, 2010, 11:02:42 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 August, 2010, 10:52:24 PM
.
By the way, Great Yarmouth is NOT great!


Whilst I concur with you, I have a four year old who would strongly disagree ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 August, 2010, 11:57:57 PM
All I get from Youtube recommendations these days is Brad Pitt getting shot in the head. ::)

Also, I shaved in the bath and managed to lose 0.01% of myself in the process.

Then, my dad forced me to watch Queens of the Stone Age on BBC3 in order to determine whether Dave Grohl was on drums or not. (HE WASN'T.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 August, 2010, 12:19:40 PM
It's nearly half twelve on a Saturday, and no bugger's nabbed the prog 1700 thread yet.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 August, 2010, 03:52:40 PM
I am terrible at figures and maths and the amount of times i have made really stupid mathematical errors and then typed them but for some reason it doesnt compute.

I said in another comment that 44.1 Ibs was 5.25 percent of what i weigh which was completely stupid when it should have been a fifth.Honestly if there wasnt any such thing as a calculator i would be screwed because i cant do written or mental arithmatic properly even when its that basic.

It all just gets on my tits big time.

My final school exam result in maths was the lowest grade it was possible to get.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 August, 2010, 04:00:01 PM
I did see that and, by my reckoning, that would have made you over 60 stone, but I'm not that confident of my maths either, so I kept schtum! :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 August, 2010, 08:32:16 PM
Quote from 'Whofann', over on the 2000AD & The Megazine thread at Gallifreybase. 'Whofann' is *c*j*, if you didn't know.

Today at 2.59pm "Prog 1700 has got some good reviews on the 2k forum so it seems the content is high quality."

He still lurks!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 28 August, 2010, 11:30:16 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 28 August, 2010, 08:32:16 PM
Quote from 'Whofann', over on the 2000AD & The Megazine thread at Gallifreybase. 'Whofann' is *c*j*, if you didn't know.

Today at 2.59pm "Prog 1700 has got some good reviews on the 2k forum so it seems the content is high quality."

He still lurks!

SBT

I just spent a good hour or so going through his contributions over there.  I see he's already had to be warned by the mod about personal attacks. He does seem to be staying relatively sane for the most part though.* Perhaps he's learned his lesson.

Or maybe the madness is just around the corner.

*I was slightly perturbed to find that his views, while being slightly more vehemently expressed, pretty much mirror my on the subject of Stront.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 31 August, 2010, 11:40:47 AM
The employment agency phoned up this morning to tell me the depot had been expecting me to turn up for work. I had to say that it was news to me, because the agency had said nothing about it on Friday, and no-one from Royal Mail could say one way or the other whether I would be needed this week. So I've got the day off, Royal Mail are short-handed, and the agency have screwed up as they so very often do. They leave an awful lot to chance.

Maybe Royal Mail should employ their own relief staff directly and pay them better than minimum wage. Having an agency acting as a middle man, whose offices are closed on Saturday, means one more pair of hands to drop the ball.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 August, 2010, 11:59:30 AM
Ugh, that brings me back to my days as an itinerant digger in the mid-90s.  On Friday morning I'd pack up my gear from whatever floor I'd been billeted on and bring it to site, then we would all be let go at 5pm in whatever corner of the country we were working in with a wave and a promise of cheques in the post, and then I'd try to make my way by bus back home to the Dublin bedsit I was illegally cohabitating in at the weekends.  Then on Sunday lunchtime I would use the payphone in the corridor to phone my ex-boss (the days before mobiles, and in my case cars) and he'd sound very surprised and say he was of course expecting to pick me in his jeep on O'Connell Street at 6pm to take me back down for work in Sligo (or wherever) the next morning.  Why he could never just tell us this on Friday I could never establish.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: davethomson on 31 August, 2010, 12:15:02 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 31 August, 2010, 11:40:47 AM
Maybe Royal Mail should employ their own relief staff directly and pay them better than minimum wage.

It's funny you should say that because that's what they do in their sorting offices. I signed up with an an agency to sort mail over the winter. When us agency plebs arrived we found that the majority of temps there were employed directly by the Royal Mail, received a higher hourly rate and paid breaks. ::)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 31 August, 2010, 06:21:00 PM
I went in this Organic food cafe this morning for a can of drink and it was staffed by a rude miserable Lesbian.I presume she ? was a Lesbian and female but she was one of the types of indeterminate sex.anyway i am sick and tired of cafes and shops whose fridges and chilling cabinets dont work and if they are going to charge me 1.30 for a can of drink [Whole Earth Cola] i expect it to be cold.Then she ? was complaining that i left the cans in an untidy mess when i left them neatly stacked on the shelves as i found them.

This is what i told her and i told her the fridbge wasnt working.

If someone has an attitude problem then they shouldnt be working serving customers in a cafe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 September, 2010, 12:30:47 PM
Bollocks!

I went to the picture framers earlier to collect two art pieces and could only collect the pic of half Dredd, half Rico's face, as the Cellar of Dredd piece was not done in the non reflective glass  :o
The bloke said give him half an hour and he'd rectify it but I said I'll be back on Friday'ish and then killed him!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 01 September, 2010, 12:47:15 PM
 :D

But after you'd killed him did he do it any quicker?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 September, 2010, 12:50:22 PM
No but it calmed me down, well that is until Friday when I wonder why it hasn't been done  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 02 September, 2010, 11:11:35 AM
Since Tuesday I've gone a bit bonkers and spent £130 buying trades and graphic novels. I'm really going to regret that outlay come the end of the month when I've got no money left.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 September, 2010, 11:21:41 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 31 August, 2010, 06:21:00 PM
If someone has an attitude problem then they shouldnt be working serving customers in a cafe.

True 'nuff, but I am impressed that the exchange was intense enough that you could work out someone's sexual orientation without knowing their gender!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 September, 2010, 05:18:00 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 September, 2010, 11:21:41 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 31 August, 2010, 06:21:00 PM
If someone has an attitude problem then they shouldnt be working serving customers in a cafe.

True 'nuff, but I am impressed that the exchange was intense enough that you could work out someone's sexual orientation without knowing their gender!

I think it was the Millie Tant look that gave it away.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 03 September, 2010, 12:42:48 PM
You anticipate waiting in all day for a delivery as the courier can't give a time, nip out for 5 minutes - and they turn up in your absence. This means they leave a card and you don't get the delivery until next week. Grrr...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 September, 2010, 12:43:35 PM
My nice new boots have given me a blister.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 03 September, 2010, 04:46:57 PM
ive been waiting weaks for the transformers and outher coletibiles I bort to turn up in the post they do and I had a cold so I could not do a video review because cold make my voise sound funny so ive been waiting and im all most over it all that left is a slight bit of a cold that makeing me sound worses than when I had the full blone cold and If I dont get the 27 video reviews out of the way befor monday it could be months befor I get anouther charnce I hate haveing colds.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 03 September, 2010, 06:16:18 PM
Cyberleader, thank god your not doing written reviews!  :lol: Though, it would be torturously entertaining, trying to work out what in the name of the baby Jesus your going on about!  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 September, 2010, 06:45:03 PM
All day I've been stuck working near to a badly tuned radio that played non stop robot voice chav music. I have a headache.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 September, 2010, 10:59:41 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 September, 2010, 11:21:41 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 31 August, 2010, 06:21:00 PM
If someone has an attitude problem then they shouldnt be working serving customers in a cafe.

True 'nuff, but I am impressed that the exchange was intense enough that you could work out someone's sexual orientation without knowing their gender!

In Brighton it's a question of playing fairly safe odds.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 04 September, 2010, 11:06:29 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 September, 2010, 10:59:41 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 September, 2010, 11:21:41 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 31 August, 2010, 06:21:00 PM
If someone has an attitude problem then they shouldnt be working serving customers in a cafe.

True 'nuff, but I am impressed that the exchange was intense enough that you could work out someone's sexual orientation without knowing their gender!

In Brighton it's a question of playing fairly safe odds.

That's why Mr Wolf stays there :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 03 September, 2010, 06:16:18 PM
Cyberleader, thank god your not doing written reviews!  :lol: Though, it would be torturously entertaining, trying to work out what in the name of the baby Jesus your going on about!  ;)

well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 04 September, 2010, 09:17:45 PM
Quote from: Banners on 03 September, 2010, 12:42:48 PM
You anticipate waiting in all day for a delivery as the courier can't give a time, nip out for 5 minutes - and they turn up in your absence. This means they leave a card and you don't get the delivery until next week. Grrr...

M@


the fuckers hide round the corner y'know
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 04 September, 2010, 09:55:03 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.

And it's everything you'd hope it would be. Genius.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 04 September, 2010, 09:59:08 PM
...because ive just spent half an hour reading 'The Giant Book Of Villains' (magpie books, 1994) and despite being a rufty tufty type, i now feel emotionally and physically sick. Lucian Staniak and Peter Kurten: you fuckers.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 04 September, 2010, 11:16:52 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 04 September, 2010, 09:55:03 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.

And it's everything you'd hope it would be. Genius.

Oh I dunno - that photograph is out of focus.

CL2K: I know it has been said before but I'm sure you'd find a spellchecker a real help - you are making some impressively consistent spelling mistakes so you could even write it up in a word processor and the auto correct would do a lot of the work for you. I think you'd find it very helpful and you might start spotting the mistakes as you type.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 04 September, 2010, 11:46:10 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 04 September, 2010, 09:59:08 PM
Lucian Staniak and Peter Kurten: you fuckers.

Kürten I'd heard of but not Staniak. Shit, that must have been uneasy reading.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 September, 2010, 11:50:08 PM
I am sat outside my local store with a trailer full of food for tomorrow and I can't get in. The reason being that some twat has put a heavy duty padlock onto the bolt alongside the shop one. I have sat here for 47 minutes and am awaiting Vicky's mob to cut it off.
Still, it means I can fart about on the web before I get in there and read my book!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 05 September, 2010, 12:03:00 AM
Quote from: worldshown on 04 September, 2010, 11:46:10 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 04 September, 2010, 09:59:08 PM
Lucian Staniak and Peter Kurten: you fuckers.

Kürten I'd heard of but not Staniak. Shit, that must have been uneasy reading.

The story of Albert Fish (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Fish) never fails to horrify - I lost count of the number of times I thought to myself "he did what?" when first reading about him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 05 September, 2010, 12:04:31 AM
I've can't find the book I was reading. I bet I fucking lost it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 September, 2010, 01:29:09 AM
Quote from: Inev on 05 September, 2010, 12:04:31 AM
I've can't find the book I was reading. I bet I fucking lost it.
Nay. It's over there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 05 September, 2010, 09:15:33 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 03 September, 2010, 06:16:18 PM
Cyberleader, thank god your not doing written reviews!  :lol: Though, it would be torturously entertaining, trying to work out what in the name of the baby Jesus your going on about!  ;)

well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.
Followed.  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 September, 2010, 07:06:09 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 04 September, 2010, 09:55:03 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.

And it's everything you'd hope it would be. Genius.

It's a thing of beauty and wonder.  Today's entry:  "Some Times Things can be more than a Cowindins"

CL2K, you are to spelling what the rainforests are (allegedely) to medicine, an unstoppable engine of creation.  Keep it up man, you have Samuel Johnson on the ropes!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 05 September, 2010, 07:11:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 05 September, 2010, 07:06:09 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 04 September, 2010, 09:55:03 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.

And it's everything you'd hope it would be. Genius.

It's a thing of beauty and wonder.  Today's entry:  "Some Times Things can be more than a Cowindins"

CL2K, you are to spelling what the rainforests are (allegedely) to medicine, an unstoppable engine of creation.  Keep it up man, you have Samuel Johnson on the ropes!

And Johnson never came up with anything as good as Arsom, or at least nothing Tharg used.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 05 September, 2010, 07:17:03 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 05 September, 2010, 07:11:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 05 September, 2010, 07:06:09 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 04 September, 2010, 09:55:03 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 04 September, 2010, 09:09:32 PM
well if you up to the challenage I wright a Blog (http://cyberleader1.blogspot.com/) talking about stuf I have bort and what I think of it.

And it's everything you'd hope it would be. Genius.

It's a thing of beauty and wonder.  Today's entry:  "Some Times Things can be more than a Cowindins"

CL2K, you are to spelling what the rainforests are (allegedely) to medicine, an unstoppable engine of creation.  Keep it up man, you have Samuel Johnson on the ropes!

And Johnson never came up with anything as good as Arsom, or at least nothing Tharg used.

I best copy wright arsom befor some one takes credit for it :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 September, 2010, 08:49:29 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 05 September, 2010, 07:17:03 PM
I best copy wright arsom befor some one takes credit for it :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

You might be better off trademarking it. I've had expert legal advice on the subject.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 September, 2010, 10:32:34 PM
I forgot to add: my copy of Prog 1701 was shredded before it got put in the envelope. They must know who I am! It appears I got the top copy off the printer's bundle, or something. I will contact delightful Denise and ask for a replacement copy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 September, 2010, 03:36:57 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 11:14:25 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 11 August, 2010, 09:53:11 AM
Another example is Aspartame.

I dont even know with absolute certainty that the tap water here doesnt contain Fluoride and god knows how many other toxic substances.

I don't trust aspartame. I never knowingly eat or drink anything containing aspartame, saccharine or acesulfame potassium, because I don't know what the the health effects are or any of them. At least with sugar I know it can cause tooth decay, diabetes and coronary heart disease. The answer to that is to try to minimise your consumption of sugar rather than to add chemicals into your diet. I still eat too much sugar, but I don't add it to tea or coffee or sprinkle it on my cereal, and I generally halve the amount specified in recipes, such as when baking cakes.

If you are worried about fluoride in your water supply, it should be relatively easy to find out from your water company or Health Trust if fluoride is deliberately added. To the best of my knowledge they don't add fluoride to the water supply in East Sussex.

Edit: The British Dental Health Foundation says it's only added to water in the west Midlands and the north east.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 September, 2010, 03:42:02 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 September, 2010, 03:36:57 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 13 August, 2010, 11:14:25 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 11 August, 2010, 09:53:11 AM
Another example is Aspartame.

I dont even know with absolute certainty that the tap water here doesnt contain Fluoride and god knows how many other toxic substances.

I don't trust aspartame. I never knowingly eat or drink anything containing aspartame, saccharine or acesulfame potassium, because I don't know what the the health effects are or any of them. At least with sugar I know it can cause tooth decay, diabetes and coronary heart disease. The answer to that is to try to minimise your consumption of sugar rather than to add chemicals into your diet. I still eat too much sugar, but I don't add it to tea or coffee or sprinkle it on my cereal, and I generally halve the amount specified in recipes, such as when baking cakes.

If you are worried about fluoride in your water supply, it should be relatively easy to find out from your water company or Health Trust if fluoride is deliberately added. To the best of my knowledge they don't add fluoride to the water supply in East Sussex.

Edit: The British Dental Health Foundation says it's only added to water in the west Midlands and the north east.

Not sure what happened then but to update i havent touched a drop of any canned soft drink that contains HFCS since i posted that comment and i feel so much better for it as i feel cleaner inside and healthier and brighter and the creeping persistant lethargy that i had where i just didnt feel right has all gone.I felt like i shouldnt have been drinking it anyway.

I have only been drinking the non HFCS drinks since then.

The tiredness could have been due to the HFCS playing havoc with blood sugar levels so i might have had very mild diabetes for all i know.

I was reading the ingredients to a box of chewing gum the other day and it was the type that is the black cardboard box thats called "Blue" something or other and it was unbelievable because it listed 5 different kinds of artificial sweetener in it !!

Aspartame - Acesulfame - and i forget the rest but the boxes should have health warnings on them because chewing that is like slowly poisoning yourself as its absorbed straight through the tongue like licking Amphetamines . :sick:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 08 September, 2010, 04:21:02 PM
Lots of people are on about this new Google logo but I can't bloomin' see it.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 September, 2010, 06:22:48 PM
My one year old daughter just decided to throw our entire stock of toilet paper into the bath as my wife was running it for her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 08 September, 2010, 06:52:31 PM
and i bet you really need a poo now! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 September, 2010, 08:15:23 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 08 September, 2010, 06:22:48 PM
My one year old daughter just decided to throw our entire stock of toilet paper into the bath as my wife was running it for her.

:lol: . Just wait until the toilet starts getting blocked up with Toilet Rolls. >:D





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 September, 2010, 07:23:25 PM
Trying to type in a French hotel, but their keyboqrds qre all in the wrong order. And they're about to kick me off the machine anywqy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 September, 2010, 07:28:49 PM
Why do the French have to be different all the time?





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 10 September, 2010, 10:35:21 PM
My wife commented tonight on the butterfly that was drawn on my four year old daughter's magnetic drawing pad, saying how good she is getting and that you can actually tell what it is that she is trying to draw most of the time now.

I drew the bloody thing  :-[.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 September, 2010, 10:56:11 PM
I've worked 50 hours this week for minimum wage and, stranded at the depot for three hours, getting paid for it, with tea but nothing to eat, I had a mini blackout with dizziness, deafness and incomprehension. I was right as rain again after a bit of a sit down on my lift home. I've another shift tomorrow starting at 6.30am.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 September, 2010, 11:00:25 PM
But you have a strong work ethic House of Usher and that is something to be proud of.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 September, 2010, 11:05:01 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 September, 2010, 11:00:25 PM
But you have a strong work ethic House of Usher and that is something to be proud of.

And at least I'm not driving!  :lol:

Next week is going to be a cakewalk by comparison. Fixed hours (40, max.), and sorting not delivering. No travelling or waiting involved either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 11 September, 2010, 01:23:11 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 10 September, 2010, 10:35:21 PM
My wife commented tonight on the butterfly that was drawn on my four year old daughter's magnetic drawing pad, saying how good she is getting and that you can actually tell what it is that she is trying to draw most of the time now.

I drew the bloody thing  :-[.

This is the funniest thing I've read in months p.s. it also made my mum laugh :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 11 September, 2010, 02:27:34 AM
QuoteThis is the funniest thing I've read in months

I'll second that. Classic!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 11 September, 2010, 11:03:03 AM
Having to convert 6807 music files from .wma to .mp3. Bugger.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 11 September, 2010, 12:05:27 PM
I let this morning's weather forecast stop me going to Leuchars. Which is two impediments for the price of one as it meant I was up early on a Saturday for nothing.

Also, I don't know where to buy a feather duster (or similar synthetic substitute) as none of the supermarkets seem to have such a product.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 11 September, 2010, 10:01:49 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 11 September, 2010, 01:23:11 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 10 September, 2010, 10:35:21 PM
My wife commented tonight on the butterfly that was drawn on my four year old daughter's magnetic drawing pad, saying how good she is getting and that you can actually tell what it is that she is trying to draw most of the time now.

I drew the bloody thing  :-[.

This is the funniest thing I've read in months p.s. it also made my mum laugh :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Even funnier is the image of you and your mother looking over your shoulder as you peruse this site.
Life in the cyber household.
(http://news-pictures.broadband-finder.co.uk/Silver+surfers_959_19039004_0_0_7016958_300.jpg)

V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 12 September, 2010, 10:49:22 AM
A group of ten of us went out for a curry last night. Table was booked in advance. It wasn't packed when we arrived but got very busy as the night went on.
We arrived at 7.30 and didn't get any food until 10.00!

We kept asking where our food was and kept getting told "Sorry, we are very busy".
I had a similar experience at another place a while back and waited for one and a half hours, I'm sure some of these places are doing a lot of takeaways and don't concentrate on the diners in the restaurant.

At the end a rather feisty female in our party complained very loudly and got us a 25% discount. None of us will be going there again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 September, 2010, 11:33:51 AM
That is pathetic. I'm furious even on your behalf. In a large group you're a bit stuck. If there were even only four of you you'd have given up after an hour and gone elsewhere, I'm sure.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 September, 2010, 03:54:42 PM
I might have let them get away with 45 mins but only if they were busy. You should have smashed the place up, only kidding  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 12 September, 2010, 04:29:08 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 12 September, 2010, 11:33:51 AMIf there were even only four of you you'd have given up after an hour and gone elsewhere, I'm sure.

Absolutely right. Some of us were thinking of doing that. The attitude of the staff was poor too, they didn't seem to be too concerned as to why we were getting so pissed off.

At one point they offered us a free bottle of wine. One bottle that probably cost them about £3 between ten of us. When we said that wasn't good enough and we didn't want it they said "You can take it home". Idiots.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 September, 2010, 08:08:29 PM
I had a similar experience recently, we waited almost 2 hours between starters and main, in the end we all told the waiter that we wouldn't be ordering any more drinks until the food arrived, which had a miraculous effect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 September, 2010, 09:14:14 PM
Yeah. This is classic Indian restaurant tactics: big group of lads will keep buying lager. Rog's strategy sounds a good one but hard to orchestrate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 12 September, 2010, 09:39:02 PM
I would have gone spare waiting 2.5hours to eat drink or no drink.

I would have had to have a quiet word with those responsible.......

"In the meantime we would like 100 pints of Lager and 4 Popadums..."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 September, 2010, 09:51:22 PM
Self-titled albums are bad enough. But when it's not even your debut?

When it's your fourth album?

You guys just lost yourselves a sale.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 September, 2010, 11:26:01 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 12 September, 2010, 09:39:02 PM
"In the meantime we would like 100 pints of Lager and 4 Popadums..."

"...and the finest wines available to humanity!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 13 September, 2010, 10:11:23 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 12 September, 2010, 09:51:22 PM
Self-titled albums are bad enough. But when it's not even your debut?

When it's your fourth album?

You guys just lost yourselves a sale.

Tell that to Peter Gabriel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 September, 2010, 10:14:32 AM
They had alternative titles, so he gets a pass.

And before anyone starts, Led Zeppelin's fourth album isn't called "Led Zeppelin", it's called "Led Zeppelin IV".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 13 September, 2010, 10:18:58 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 12 September, 2010, 09:51:22 PM
Self-titled albums are bad enough. But when it's not even your debut?

When it's your fourth album?

You guys just lost yourselves a sale.

Does this mean you didn't buy Blur's self titled fifth album then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 13 September, 2010, 10:19:58 AM
Technically Led Zeppelin's fourth album doesn't have a title...  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 September, 2010, 11:20:56 AM
Drokk! I'm awake but the alarm is set for 14:00, what to do!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 September, 2010, 01:35:45 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 13 September, 2010, 10:19:58 AM
Technically Led Zeppelin's fourth album doesn't have a title...  :)

'course it does! It's (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c5/Zoso.svg/55px-Zoso.svg.png)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 14 September, 2010, 11:59:46 AM
Left my sudafed at home. I am allergic to London.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 September, 2010, 05:06:54 PM
A bunch of the corduroy on my trousers has been eroded.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 September, 2010, 06:32:24 PM
Reading The Mega City One Archives 3. Judge Fear's shoulder armour: "conventional pads with a zig zag motif" apparently. So, not man traps then?
This isnt good.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 14 September, 2010, 06:37:05 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 September, 2010, 05:06:54 PM
A bunch of the corduroy on my trousers has been eroded.

Stop rubbing yourself then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 September, 2010, 08:48:29 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 14 September, 2010, 06:32:24 PM
Reading The Mega City One Archives 3. Judge Fear's shoulder armour: "conventional pads with a zig zag motif" apparently. So, not man traps then?

What's The Mega City One Archives?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 September, 2010, 08:56:42 PM
I'm working indoors this week, with fixed hours, but it means I'm constantly subjected to the kitsch-obsessed Radio 2, starting with Chris Evans.

:|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 September, 2010, 11:14:21 PM
I used a pumice stone to shave my legs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 14 September, 2010, 11:19:43 PM
Do you have to shave prostheses?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 September, 2010, 12:47:57 PM
In desperation the wife and I took on a weekend job handling (from home) an out-of-hours phone line for the place she works.  We had hoped for more hours, seeing as the service was her idea in the first place, but we ended up with the weekend night shift which oddly enough nobody else wanted.  We figured that between the two of us we could handle the kids and the phoneline, maybe even get some of my own work done in between calls once the kids were in bed.  Turned out to be a lot more work than expected, but hey, we're desperate, and at least there were two of us.  

Today she got her first payslip with the extra job on it, and after tax and various deductions it worked out as just over €4 an hour - for the two of us (that's STG£3.30 to be split two ways, fact fans).  For Saturday and Sunday evenings up to midnight.  They had neglected to mention that these hours wouldn't be at her "regular" hourly wage (never mind overtime), but rather at minimum wage, which was then taxed at the maximum rate because it was tacked on as overtime to her monthly wages.  I'd love to complain to her wankstain of a boss, but frankly we need the money.  Plus it beats my earnings for last month of €500 for 200 hours.  I am enjoying this recession, I must say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 15 September, 2010, 01:09:14 PM
That sounds more like a major impediment!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 September, 2010, 01:19:27 PM
Nah, still minor - had just hoped for (a lot) more money in return.  Also, I'm over-egging the pudding saying the money should be split 'two ways' - it's a one-man job, it's just that working from home in the evenings a second person obviously has to be there for kid wrangling.  That's nobody's fault but ours.  What does annoy is that the wife came up with the idea, is spectacularly good at the work (it's an emergency advice line, and she is brilliantly soothing, helpful and knowledgeable (I just screen the pointless calls and she takes over if it's genuine)), and yet is being paid as if she just wandered in off the street.  I also feel like poo for placing her in a situation where she has to stay working for a shower of self important turds 'cos my own work has turned into a financial black hole.  Bah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 September, 2010, 01:36:24 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 15 September, 2010, 01:19:27 PM
Nah, still minor - had just hoped for (a lot) more money in return.  Also, I'm over-egging the pudding saying the money should be split 'two ways' - it's a one-man job, it's just that working from home in the evenings a second person obviously has to be there for kid wrangling.  That's nobody's fault but ours.  What does annoy is that the wife came up with the idea, is spectacularly good at the work (it's an emergency advice line, and she is brilliantly soothing, helpful and knowledgeable (I just screen the pointless calls and she takes over if it's genuine)), and yet is being paid as if she just wandered in off the street.  I also feel like poo for placing her in a situation where she has to stay working for a shower of self important turds 'cos my own work has turned into a financial black hole.  Bah!

Its not like you planned it so that your professional life has turned into a financial black hole so never feel guilty about it as its caused by external factors like everything else concerning the economy and its quite deliberate.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 15 September, 2010, 01:59:02 PM
I have this week off work and contrary to how I normally get to spend my holiday time, I planned on doing next to nothing and just relaxing with the family for a week.

My wife's car got wind of this and decided that the electric window mechanism in the drivers door would throw a seven and leave the window stuck down. I took a look at it and found out what the problem was but decided to book it into our (usually very reasonable) local garage as I really couldn't be arsed doing it for myself, I priced the parts up for about £50 and I reckon it's a couple of hours work to fit, so I thought it wouldn't be too bad

They just phoned me back and said it would cost £320.00 to fix  :o

Fucking thieves, looks like I'm doing it myself after all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 15 September, 2010, 02:36:06 PM
That happened to me recently Rog - but I'm crap at cars so had to pay up!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 September, 2010, 06:08:22 PM
I have been looking at some redecoration/repair work to Grade 1 listed buildings that is so indescribably awful and slapdash that its both painful to look at and laughable but ultimately very sad.

I dont just blame the Cowboys and Monkeys doing the work as i blame the clients who are the residents of the buildings because they are either too tight to pay for proper work or who simply dont know anything or both.They are all idiots and it makes a mockery of the fact that the buildings are listed and if the clients cant afford to pay out for repairs and maintenance then they shouldnt be living in the buildings/houses as you dont do what you cant afford.

There was one of these monkeys trying to form curved architectural detailing in plaster with a piece of Hardboard and it was extraordinary and i have never seen anything like it as it was woefully inept and if its still there on Thursday i will photograph it.

To give an example one particular building in questions maintenance contract was contracted out at 11,000 when it should have been more like 40 to 50,000 snd if you pay peanuts you get monkeys.

In short its disgraceful and criminal negligence.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 15 September, 2010, 07:08:40 PM
I spent 2 days tracking down Evangelion Unit 00 LM-HG modle kit I was not very happy about thge site I finile found it on as there shiping is a bit of a rip off but I am willing to puting up with it as I want the kit more to compleat my colechion more than I can be boutheres to by a fue quid so I went to pay and pay pal is scruing me round  >:( Scrue Pay Pal and all thros Corporate Bastards that run it >:(

(http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/9397/ban10585.jpg)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 September, 2010, 09:09:41 PM
ignore as the problem has resolved itself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 September, 2010, 09:39:02 AM
This week I accepted the offer of a week's work, Monday to Friday, fixed hours. This morning I turned up to work only to be told that no agency staff are needed today and that the agency was told last night. Bullshit. I was asked to work the whole week and I agreed. Nobody said to me anything about reviewing the needs of the business on a daily basis and adjusting the staffing accordingly. I now have 2 days off work to do with as I please. They may well have notified the agency yesterday, but I'm not convinced they did so within the agency's office hours, so the agency may have been none the wiser. In any case, that's not the point.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the future of work: 100 people turn up, they take the first 60, and the rest can go home, the way they used to hire dock-workers.

The recession is already being used to attack workers' rights, perks and rates of pay, and cuts made now will not be reversed when (I mean if) the economy ever recovers. Once you've made a saving you don't go reintroducing slack back into your organization to make everyone's lives easier and more comfortable at the expense of profit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 September, 2010, 01:50:57 PM
Went down town to the comic shop after 12:00, as the postman seems to always arrive before then. You know what's coming!
Arrived back about 13:30 to see a 'while you were out' card on the mat and it's for my pic off Dylan  >:( >:( >:(

Shall have a walk down to the collection office this evening with Sam to pick it up  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 September, 2010, 10:09:26 AM
That was the employment agency on the phone. Sorry if you didn't hear it ring - I picked it up quite promptly. The depot that decided it didn't need any casual staff on Thursday has decided that it does need people after all today at short notice. They probably need us now to clear a backlog that built up because we weren't in yesterday.

It's a pity - for them - because I'd already decided this week was a write-off and made other plans. We had an arrangement: 8 hours a day, Monday to Friday, all this week. They broke that arrangement. That's it for this week, I'm afraid; if they want us next week they can inform the agency. If you're going to drop your casual workers mid-week you need to think about whether you'll need them at the end of the week and either a) let them know in advance, or b) not drop them in the first place just to be on the safe side.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 September, 2010, 12:21:22 PM
I've lost all my TV channels and I don't know whether the digibox is fucked or it's the the ariel on the roof that needs fixing. Whichever I spend money on. it'll be the other. Any tips on locating the problem?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 September, 2010, 12:47:20 PM
My pay slip just arrived. I've been paid for 32 hours instead of 56. The payroll bosses at the main depot didn't know how many hours I worked at the satellite depot, so they just guessed and came up with 4 days at 8 hours a day instead of the variable number of hours over 6 days I actually worked and which can be confirmed by the boss of the local depot. The agency didn't query the hours authorised despite the fact I informed them of my hours worked twice during the week. This is turning out to be a really shit gig and I think I need to move on to something else as quickly as possible. F***ing story of my life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 September, 2010, 01:19:38 PM
Quote from: House of Usher
This is turning out to be a really shit gig and I think I need to move on to something else as quickly as possible...

This time last week you were really happy with the job. Stick at it, Buddy - I'm sure it'll work out soon!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 17 September, 2010, 04:50:22 PM
dunno.... if it's Royal Mail....

My brother ended up giving up his flat and going home to mum sick for a few months after working for them on an agency basis. Too much stress! (He is in a now a highly-paid-for-the-area IT monkey job and is much happier.)

But you are aware of your rights and sound prepared to stand up for them unlike some people so you'll be okay in the long run I expect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 September, 2010, 07:17:58 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 17 September, 2010, 12:47:20 PM
My pay slip just arrived. I've been paid for 32 hours instead of 56. The payroll bosses at the main depot didn't know how many hours I worked at the satellite depot, so they just guessed and came up with 4 days at 8 hours a day instead of the variable number of hours over 6 days I actually worked and which can be confirmed by the boss of the local depot.

If you are seriously thinking of chucking it in, you should at least try to tackle some of the problems you've encountered - you've nothing to lose if you've no intention of hanging on.  This latest one is fraud, pure and simple, and should be easily resolved.  As the Agency is presumably taking a cut they even have motivation to assist.  As you noted earlier in the week this shite is now endemic, the 'lucky to have a job' mentality of employers that's about one step away from Dickens' most biting grotesques.  And it's not just in the (forgive me) unskilled sector, where it's sadly always been part and parcel of the casual labour scene.  A 'colleague' of mine recently decided that he was going to cut his professional staff's wages to "a tenner a day above the dole, and I'll still be drowning in CVs" - and he was right.    

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 September, 2010, 10:21:13 PM
I've got an interview coming up for a teaching job at a university. It's 4 hours a week and pays £76 - that's pro rata of £36,000.

The problem is it's a whole day's work they want done in 4 hours on the cheap. They want the tutor to originate all the course material with no lead-in time for preparation. The amount of time needed for preparation is one good reason to pay teaching staff all year round, but increasingly they are expected to make it up as they go along, doing most of the work at evenings or weekends.

If they were paying for the full day I'd be very keen to do it, but for just £76 it's really not worth my while; I would be better off as a supply teacher.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 September, 2010, 10:44:42 PM
sounds like the sort of job that's only worth it if you're trying to get your foot in the door and you knew it would lead to better hours in the future. As it stands, if they think that's a good career choice, they're just taking the piss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 18 September, 2010, 10:09:05 PM
My wife has bought a glitter ball, and hung it up in our lounge. Not only does this make our front room 21% camper than it was (and it was already pretty damn camp) but i bang my head on it every drokkin' time i walk into the dining room. Every. Time. I apparently have no spacial awareness.

What's worse, is thst from where i sit on the sofa, i keep catching it out of the corner of my eye- where it looks exactly like the lit kitchen window that overlooked us until i hung the crimson satin drape (told you) over our back door. Thus, i keep getting mild panics that the neighbours can see me in my pants.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 18 September, 2010, 10:30:47 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 18 September, 2010, 10:09:05 PM
Thus, i keep getting mild panics that the neighbours can see me in my pants.



Would you rather them see you naked?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 19 September, 2010, 04:39:23 PM
Earlier, I found a slow-worm in the garden.

Unfortunately, I found it with the lawnmower.  :(

And yes, it did the freaky tail wiggle thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 September, 2010, 09:30:48 PM
Roger removed the breadbox from the cupboard. Unbeknownst to him, tea granules were propped against this box, foil askew. The cascade was not his idea. But no one else was going to hoover their shame.

A dairy requital sojourn unfurled, where he was presented with a poppy bloomer and its concurrent cascadence irked. He couldn't not pay for it. 25 pence for now, conquest for later?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 19 September, 2010, 10:37:43 PM
I lost my pet slow-worm today. I couldn't concentrate on looking for little Freddy due to the fact that someone was mowing his lawn.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 September, 2010, 10:50:06 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 September, 2010, 09:30:48 PM
A dairy requital sojourn unfurled, where he was presented with a poppy bloomer and its concurrent cascadence irked. He couldn't not pay for it. 25 pence for now, conquest for later?
How many letters?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 September, 2010, 10:54:48 PM
Conan the Destroyer isn't a patch on Conan the Barbarian.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 20 September, 2010, 11:38:34 AM
I am experiencing a very sore throat. I am remedying this with a hot toddy. I shan't care soon.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 September, 2010, 11:40:40 AM
My right shoulder hurts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 September, 2010, 11:51:07 AM
I hate mornings.

I always have and always will.

And i am waiting for scaffolding to be dropped on one job thats finished and moved to another that i am waiting to start but as usual what i am told will happen and what actually happens are two different things and its always the same when i am relying on others so no doubt this week will be wasted as i will be unable to work due to this problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 September, 2010, 12:13:55 PM
That faggy vampire show is the most successful show in the history of HBO.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 September, 2010, 01:50:26 PM
I work in a call centre and our phone system is merrily cutting everybody off, sometimes after only a couple of seconds, sometimes we get a full minute. As you can guess, after people have phoned back several times, they start to get a little bit pissed off, and we get the flak.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 September, 2010, 08:14:36 PM
The guy in front of me who was wearing a sleeveless vest cleared out the cabinet by ordering six meals for his fucking kids or whatever. After he ordered he went to the Co-op next door whilst they were preparing and they came back with a two litre bottle of Coca-cola because heaven knows the little darlings can't suffer store own-brand. [should this be store-own brand?] The child who he had elected to bring with him had an important question.

CHILD: "You know those long sausages, bigger than the jumbos?"

BRENDA: "Yes?"

CHILD: "Do they cost more?"

I was moved to comment thusly.

ROGER: "Wu...(?(?))"




As I left I witnessed his white van, which he had parked in landscape across 4 bays. It was decorated with Mickey and Minnie and advertised "free delivery". Was he luring kids with the starchiest chips in town and selling them?

I thought back to his vest legend. "FORTIS SCAFFOLDING." For Tolliver, Ignacio and Stephan? My cousin Tolliver? Is scaffolding what they call it nowadays?

Maybe "For Tis' the scaffolding"? Maybe a child is the scaffolding of our society. As abduction was the ephemeral baggage of a white van it occurred to me that I should rescue children from their fucking moronic parents, a notion which received an emergency contextual amendment to taking place in the strictly allegorical rescue that is inferred in the practice of formal education.

That guy was skinny and I was fat. I should have tried to take him.


Right?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 September, 2010, 10:32:21 PM
I just knocked over the inkwell as i was inking.My inkwell is one of those mini glass jamjars with a lid that you get in hotels.I have been so careful about avoiding this happening and i always replace the lid when its not being used as well but sooner or later the worst is always going to happen.This was the wrong choice because inkwells always have very thick heavy bases so they cant be knocked over.

Luckily the ink itself had thickened a bit so it was semi-viscious as its shellac based so it didnt spill everywhere and stayed in a pool which is the only thing that stopped the incident from being a fucking catastrophe.It missed my work i was inking as well.

The worst thing is that my workstation/computer desk is antique stripped pine and the ink has soaked into the grain of the wood and permanently stained it unless its sanded right down and worse than that this desk is a rare piece of furniture as its half of an early 19th cent Campaign Chest

Fucking Arseholes



>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 20 September, 2010, 10:44:10 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 20 September, 2010, 08:14:36 PMRight?

S'right.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 September, 2010, 08:24:04 AM
Well, i watched my 'freebie copy' of The Horde... and it was bollocks.
The usual mix of hideous actors (are there NO attractive actors in france?) a lousy script written to include as much macho posturing as possible, with "fuck you, badass!" dialogue that reduced the wife and i to fits of giggles repeatedly. It's dated, not particularly gory (unless you are impressed by blood squibs and pathetic gunshot sequences), is all set in a tower block, while all the really interesting stuff is outside and you never see it (sound familiar?) and as a result looks cheap.
One assumes it's got a rep simply because it's french. Well, it's fuck-awful, even from the point of view of a zombie-zombie like me.
And that, is a minor impediment today, because the movie was free, so it doesnt really matter one jot!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 21 September, 2010, 09:38:41 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 21 September, 2010, 08:24:04 AM
Well, i watched my 'freebie copy' of The Horde... and it was bollocks.
The usual mix of hideous actors (are there NO attractive actors in france?) a lousy script written to include as much macho posturing as possible, with "fuck you, badass!" dialogue that reduced the wife and i to fits of giggles repeatedly. It's dated, not particularly gory (unless you are impressed by blood squibs and pathetic gunshot sequences), is all set in a tower block, while all the really interesting stuff is outside and you never see it (sound familiar?) and as a result looks cheap.
One assumes it's got a rep simply because it's french. Well, it's fuck-awful, even from the point of view of a zombie-zombie like me.
And that, is a minor impediment today, because the movie was free, so it doesnt really matter one jot!
SBT

Saw this in the shop recently, and thought the the title and cover art was a really cynical attempt to tap into the Left 4 Dead audience. Then again, I might just be being cynical.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 21 September, 2010, 11:51:38 AM
Rcntly I'v fnd tht whn I typ I bgnnng t lv t vwls, s t nds p lk smthng frm EXTNCT. 

It's a pain in the arse!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 September, 2010, 01:45:41 PM
Yet again I got kicked in the balls by my four year old daughter.

I've probably posted the very same thing in this thread before, it strikes me as something I would do as it's not the first time it's happened.

To be fair, it was an accident and I was chasing her around with a blanket stretched over my outstretched arms, pretending to be Mothra at the time. I have since explained to her that Mothra is female and can't be stopped in this way, unlike daddy.

There's probably a funny mothballs related comment to be made from all this but I'm tired and my balls hurt so I can't concentrate on it right now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 21 September, 2010, 02:51:08 PM
That happened to a friend of mine Rog - he ended up having to have surgery to untangle his knackers!  :o

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 21 September, 2010, 04:55:42 PM
mini mog got all upset today when we dropped her at school,very clingy and feels "alone" we felt like a pair of shits leaving her and dont know why she suddenly has a dislike when her first year was the bestest thing ever. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 September, 2010, 12:54:33 PM
Clipper lighters.

Complete Shite.Why design and manufacture a product that is inherently defective ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 22 September, 2010, 01:14:59 PM
In the latest round of drama and misfortune that is my girlfriend's family, her dad has been admitted to hospital with - and I admit I'm a bit hazy on the details here - a nasty case of exploded bollocks.

Apparently he had some sort of cyst or abcess, which was causing him a lot of discomfort when sitting down. He did visit his GP over it, but the GP just prescribed antibiotics without actually examining him. I mean, I wouldn't want to look at his scrotum either, but y'know, that's just something a GP has to put up with occasionally. The antibiotics were too little too late and in the early hours of Sunday morning, his spuds let loose the build up of whatever the hell was in there. I'm told the smell was unearthly.

I know, but I'm getting all this passed from her mum, via her, so any fine detail or actual medical terminology went out the window a couple of iterations ago.

Obviously I'm quite concerned for my girlfriend, as she's still getting over the death of her brother earlier in the year but, on the other hand, a guy I don't like very much and who has made life quite unpleasant for my girlfriend ever since I've known her has just had his knackers burst, so it kind of evens itself out.

Am I a bad person?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2010, 01:26:24 PM
You have enlivened our afternoons with the gift of laughter.


You are not a bad person.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 22 September, 2010, 01:30:54 PM
Well Noisy, you don't have to like everyone and occasionally it does ye good to laugh at others misfortune.

But yes. You're a bad person. But I like it!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 September, 2010, 01:48:35 PM
I farted on my hand, but I forget which hand and I need to apply Vaseline to my lips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 September, 2010, 02:08:57 PM
I've lost my glasses. Anyone seen them?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 22 September, 2010, 02:17:36 PM
ARe they on top of your head?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 22 September, 2010, 04:44:02 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 September, 2010, 02:08:57 PM
I've lost my glasses. Anyone seen them?
DON'T SIT DOWN TH... Ah, too late.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 September, 2010, 04:48:59 PM
the fact that I now need glasses is a sign of encroaching old age, but I'm not that far gone yet!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 September, 2010, 05:33:10 PM
Spent all day trying to fix a broken page on a new website due to go live any moment. Nothing I was doing was having any effect on the site at all, and I was completely stumped and very angry and frustrated.

I realised just five minutes ago that I'd been uploading the new code to the wrong damn folder on the server. What a waste of emotion and effort.

Ghnananaghaghanaahhhh!!!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 22 September, 2010, 05:37:47 PM
I am 99 percent that i have lost 24,000 quids worth of work.Ok it was never guaranteed that my tender had been accepted as i was the most expensive out of the 3 that were invited to tender but what fucking pisses me off is the fact that the project was being handled by a surveyor who told me very clearly that i would be notified by formally by letter if my tender had been accepted or if it hadnt but so far i have heard fuck all and on my way home i see scaffolding going up and i dont know WTF is going on ???.

Unless its a situation where the surveyor handling the project doesnt know what is going on i fucking expect to be notified one way or the other because i am trying to plan my fucking life !!.

This situation is very very far from being satisfactory and i am fucking pissed off about it.

In the morning when i make a phone call to the surveyor i expect to find out more......

I am so fucked off with it all and the fucked system i have to live in and you try and get ahead and its one step forward and two steps backwards i sometimes wonder why the fuck i bother with it all and all the fucking time and effort i put into trying to generate work is all fucking wasted.

Fuck It All.

Useless fucking Lackadaisical Cunts.

>:( >:(


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:05:26 PM
Came home from work to find armed police blocking off one end of my street.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 September, 2010, 06:05:50 PM
I was looking forward to hearing Pendulum in the Live Lounge on Radio 1 after Fearne Cotton had been building it up all week, but just before it went out on air we finished the job we were working on and got moved to a workshop at the other end of the site, where they were listening to Real Radio.

I'll now have to catch up with it on the internet, which will require actual effort and I won't get paid for the time spent listening to it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 September, 2010, 06:06:40 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:05:26 PM
Came home from work to find armed police blocking off one end of my street.

Do you have to go round the block and go in the other end then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:12:49 PM
Came in the other end anyway.

Seems to have scaled down now. There's only a police car and a van there and the armed officer doesn't seem to be around anymore.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 September, 2010, 06:17:00 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:12:49 PM
Came in the other end anyway.

So it was only almost a minor impediment then?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 23 September, 2010, 12:41:53 AM
118 have decided to ruin the concentration re-alignment on the way out of and into film instalments between adverts.

Its like they' ve added on to the distracting, catchy Ghostbuster theme with even more garish, attention seeking, lyric replacement alongside shit uses for 118 ideas. Look. I've even done some of their fucking work for them via my complaint. This may be promoted to "Life Spugs."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 September, 2010, 01:12:37 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 22 September, 2010, 06:06:40 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:05:26 PM
Came home from work to find armed police blocking off one end of my street.

Do you have to go round the block and go in the other end then?

It sounds like the Keystone Cops.Why not block both ends ??

:lol: ::)

Quote from: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:12:49 PM
Came in the other end anyway.

Seems to have scaled down now. There's only a police car and a van there and the armed officer doesn't seem to be around anymore.

I expect whoever the police were after left the same way.Thats what i would have done if i was in that situation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 23 September, 2010, 06:08:21 PM
Ok so after the last weak I've been going thro a stack of new figures and toys I've had building up the past year and was so pleased to be getting to open my alien and predator and no sooner than 5 minutes after I get it out of the packaging the arm joint at the elbow just falls apart not broke it just falls off and I'm very annoyed as the predator was free but the alien was the whole reason I bought the bog off deal and the alien cost me £14.99 >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 September, 2010, 06:35:07 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 September, 2010, 01:12:37 AM
Quote from: worldshown on 22 September, 2010, 06:05:26 PM
Came home from work to find armed police blocking off one end of my street.
It sounds like the Keystone Cops.Why not block both ends ??

Reading between the lines, I suspect the police cordon was intended to stop anyone entering another street from the end of Worldshown's street, rather than to prevent Worldshown getting home.

;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 September, 2010, 06:45:10 PM
Today i was cycling through a sidestreet in Hove and a siver BMW pulled out from its parked position and drove right in my path so i said "WTF ARE YOU DOING ??" and the driver said "I am trying to say hello !" and i thought  :-\ and then realised it was someone i know and i thought "Oh Shit......".The driver of the car then drove off and then i chased them on the bike and caught up and i apologised and then we stopped and chatted for a bit about the state of the economy so it was alright in the end.

It turns out certain people i know of as they are not friends have lost everything in the recession as they were property developer types.Completely bankrupt and the bank took the lot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 September, 2010, 06:53:54 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 September, 2010, 06:45:10 PM
It turns out certain people i know of as they are not friends have lost everything in the recession as they were property developer types.Completely bankrupt and the bank took the lot.

There must be a lesson there about not expanding too quickly, and knowing when to stop. Surely? Once you've made a pile as a property developer it might be a good idea to restrict new developments to one at a time projects that won't ruin you if you can't sell them.

Just a thought. I've never been a property mogul, so I could be wrong. Maybe the way forward actually is to continually plough everything you've got into more and bigger developments and keep your fingers crossed that the property market continues to boom and doesn't suddenly contract?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 24 September, 2010, 12:09:12 PM
Once again, my house is jammed with semi nude ladies and im on 'nipple spotting duty', after spending the morning stapling black cloth to the walls and ceiling of my dining room.
This time though, i got paid. Well, i got a cd. That i bought myself. To say 'well done'.
Sigh.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2010, 12:14:44 PM
I'll do it for nothing! I'll pay my own train fare and bring my own sandwiches as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 24 September, 2010, 12:55:56 PM
Currently, there's a large-breasted girl in black pvc and fishnets swinging a whip around, and my fuses keep blowing.
That isnt a euphemism, by the way.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 24 September, 2010, 12:59:36 PM
Sorry, what part of this story is a minor impediment again? I ask, as I think I can hear your smile from here :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 24 September, 2010, 01:05:27 PM
The stapling, the invasion of my house, the fact that ive got all this going on and my wife is here too, which means i am not allowed to howl at the moon and run around in priaptic glee like a randy, naked oliver reed in the outakes from curse of the werewolf after he'd had a few.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 24 September, 2010, 03:40:22 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 24 September, 2010, 01:05:27 PM
i am not allowed to howl at the moon and run around in priaptic glee like a randy, naked oliver reed in the outakes from curse of the werewolf after he'd had a few.

Do it anyway!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 24 September, 2010, 03:40:27 PM
I have left my library books on the train. I assume that if they aren't found I shall have to pay for them. Gah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 24 September, 2010, 04:52:23 PM
When I ask what size posters you want, please don't reply "one large and one medium"...(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 September, 2010, 10:33:08 PM
I had my monthly overtime claim rejected yesterday by my boss, 29 hours at 1.5 time re-calculated to 3 hours instead.

He basically interpreted the overtime rules so that he could do me out of 1.5 hours overtime every day and told me to take it to HR if I think he's wrong, taking time to remind me that we are overstaffed at the moment, the Prick.

To make matters worse I got stuck in a meeting and didn't finish the half an hour early that I should do on Friday and then hit heavy traffic on my way home (while bursting for the loo) which resulted in me now needing to put an overtime claim in for 1.5 hours for today, so now he'll think I'm taking the piss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 September, 2010, 04:08:40 PM
After a morning spent buying cheap star wars figures in a shop nearby, with the boys, i left them playing the ps2, and indulged in an hour of sorting out their boxes of action figures and associated bits and bobs.
That done, i arranged a brilliant diorama on youngest's chest of drawers: a rancor looming over a pack of daleks, while some more daleks invade a haunted house, and a group of cybermen prepare to burst through its doors.
Great, i think- that's fab. He'll love that.
No, apparently not. All swept onto the floor by a super stroppy child, who is even now filling my lounge with figures that i have explicit instructions not to touch.
Bah.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 26 September, 2010, 08:43:33 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 24 September, 2010, 12:59:36 PM
Sorry, what part of this story is a minor impediment again? I ask, as I think I can hear your smile from here :)

his camera is broken so he cant post evidence. >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 26 September, 2010, 09:20:15 PM
Re: broken camera. Nah, but there was so much stuff going on, i didnt get time to take pics. However, im sure that like the last lot they'll turn up on fb or my wife's website (www.domino-burlesk.webs.com) in a week or so.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 28 September, 2010, 07:34:48 PM
I have fallen out with someone i know who lives just around the corner from here and i have to keep avoiding this individual.He doesnt realise this but everytime i see him i dont say anything as i havent told him straight what i think and the whole thing is a pain.

I dont like being used as that was what was happening ALL the time and the final straw was when i did him a favour by obtaining something that i wont name because he was unable to source anything himself and i didnt even get a thank you for my efforts not to mention a certain amount of risk involved on the part of myself.

I should really say what i think when the opportunity arises just to end the whole thing as its just a nuisance that i have to keep dodging someone.

I have zero tolerance for being used as it has happened far too much in my life and my genorosity has been abused far too much in the past and iu cant tolerate it anymore and the way i see it if someone is causing you vexation of any kind and its a repeating pattern then get rid of them as life is too short and i dont have the patience for it anymore.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 September, 2010, 07:51:46 PM
Sometimes just a simple 'thanks' really helps Peter and I think this goes for most of us in our chosen careers. It's not hard to say but to receive it can make all the difference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 September, 2010, 12:56:47 AM
I went to the monthly film quiz at the GFT tonight and they had a quotes round plucked exclusively from eighties sci-fi films (a subgenre which makes up about 60% of my meagre DVD collection) and I still got two wrong.

See how you do:

- Why are things so heavy in the future?

- I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pissed off, whatever it is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 September, 2010, 01:24:05 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 September, 2010, 07:51:46 PM
Sometimes just a simple 'thanks' really helps Peter and I think this goes for most of us in our chosen careers. It's not hard to say but to receive it can make all the difference.

All i got in return was something along the lines of what i sold him was "Crap" so i even offered to give him his money back but curiously he wanted to keep it  :-\

I do all the running around and i have to make the calls and all the rest of it and i didnt make anything out of it and its not like i am annoyed because he has called round to borrow a cup of sugar too many times as this is more serious than that.The time before that when i wasnt able to sort him out he decided to get a bit stroppy so i thought then there were going to be problems and i thought to myself "why am i doing this anyway ??"

And no this isnt my career as it was a complete one off.

I was insulted to say the least when i expected some gratitude.The guy is a complete Tit and doesnt even realise it and it just amazes me how rude some people are and i was sick of him calling round to use my landline when he is one of those types who is too tight to pay for his own amongst other things.

If someone causes me problems then they are out as it keeps my life simple that way.Its more like one strike and you are out with me never mind 3.3 is too generous and i just know if someone does something once they will do it again and again so whats the point ??

People can be very predictable and if it was a choice between knowing people like that and not knowing anyone i would rather not know anyone.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GordonR on 29 September, 2010, 07:49:58 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 29 September, 2010, 12:56:47 AM
I went to the monthly film quiz at the GFT tonight and they had a quotes round plucked exclusively from eighties sci-fi films (a subgenre which makes up about 60% of my meagre DVD collection) and I still got two wrong.

See how you do:

- Why are things so heavy in the future?

- I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pissed off, whatever it is.

Back To The Future.

The Thing.

(First one's a lock, not so sure about the second one - think it's spoken just befor they go into the dog pen and see The Thing for the first time.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 29 September, 2010, 08:42:58 AM
QuoteI was insulted to say the least when i expected some gratitude.The guy is a complete Tit and doesnt even realise it and it just amazes me how rude some people are and i was sick of him calling round to use my landline when he is one of those types who is too tight to pay for his own amongst other things.

I think the correct term is 'parasite'. There are plenty of them out there, sadly
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 September, 2010, 08:54:37 AM
Quote from: GordonR on 29 September, 2010, 07:49:58 AM
Quote from: The Cosh
- Why are things so heavy in the future?

- I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pissed off, whatever it is.
Back To The Future.

The Thing.

(First one's a lock, not so sure about the second one - think it's spoken just befor they go into the dog pen and see The Thing for the first time.)
Spot on. I said Back to the Future 2 for the first and had a complete blank on The Thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 September, 2010, 03:23:56 PM
Sam's school phoned at 11:45 and woke me up, damn!
Still I had an interesting conversation, they could not find his packed lunch that my good lady had put in his daysack, so they had given him a school dinner. No probs, I thought.
Just now as I came into the dining room to come on here, what did I see on the table  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 29 September, 2010, 04:03:33 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2010, 12:14:44 PM
I'll do it for nothing! I'll pay my own train fare and bring my own sandwiches as well.

I'll do that and I'll help with the lacing up, pasty sticking, stocking ajusting....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 September, 2010, 05:53:44 PM
I came home from a hard day's labouring to find we're out of both bread and orange juice. I had to have pitta bread with my soup and vermouth with my absinthe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 September, 2010, 10:06:50 PM
"and vermouth with my absinthe. "

Those words perfectly match your profile pcture.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 September, 2010, 03:22:13 PM
Just had a former client on to me asking me to take over a moderately juicy job from another firm that had become 'uncontactable' and was on a deadline, and he was in a panic.  Rather than taking his arm off at the shoulder in order to feed my young, I rang the original company only to find their phones were indeed ringing out, so I tracked down a private mobile number for my 'uncontactable' colleague and told him how I'd been approached.  Apparently they'd just moved their office back to their home (same business collapse as the rest of us) and had just discovered that their business line wasn't diverting properly. 

This kind of panicky job-gazumping has been done to me countless times by my so-called professional colleagues (for all kind of spurious reasons), and I need the money so badly it genuinely hurts, but I still couldn't do it - it's not professional, and it's not right.  So why do I feel like a complete chump?  Darwin is having a right old laugh at me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 30 September, 2010, 03:36:37 PM
When I agreed to do a day's labouring out of town, I got another phonecall an hour later asking if I would like to do a morning's work that involves being on-site 40 minutes' drive away at 7.30am, with no travel allowance, for the princely sum of £24. I told them it wasn't worth my while that early in the day, that far away, for so few hours.

So they phoned me back a day later to offer me 80p more. It didn't make any difference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 01 October, 2010, 05:29:03 PM
One of the things you put over your ears just came off a pair of my glasses frames and the absolutely tiny screw thing fell on the carpet, so they are now only hanging on one ear  ::)  

Have needed new ones for a long time, oh well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 01 October, 2010, 07:14:54 PM
I'm moving flat a week tomorrow and haven't really bothered my arse packing. Noooooooo!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 October, 2010, 08:05:23 PM
There I was in the kitchen doing the pots, listening to a Best of Bowie CD when 'Under Pressure' came on.

As the song started and before I knew it, the words 'ICE ICE BABY' popped into my mind. COWELL I fucking hate you  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 01 October, 2010, 08:08:43 PM
My week off is over with less than half of what I wanted to achieve not done.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 01 October, 2010, 08:50:31 PM
I bought a new DVD that i am desperate to watch and the fucking thing wont play in my DVD player.

All i want to do is relax and watch a film but its clearly too much to ask.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 October, 2010, 09:26:34 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 October, 2010, 08:05:23 PM
There I was in the kitchen doing the pots, listening to a Best of Bowie CD when 'Under Pressure' came on.

As the song started and before I knew it, the words 'ICE ICE BABY' popped into my mind. COWELL I fucking hate you  >:D

I had the same story recently but it was Gary Numan/Sugarbabes and some daft (young) woman at work who wouldn't accept which came first.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 October, 2010, 09:31:39 PM
In a similar vein, my wife recently bought a disco ball, and now says the words "disco ball" fairly regularly. Trouble is, every time she says "disco ball" i spontaneously hear lady gaga's irritating voice singing "i wanna take a ride on your disco stick" in my head, and inevitably i start singing it too. Just cant stop it, and it's driving me mad. In fact, just typing it here has made me do it again. Im doing it now.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 October, 2010, 11:04:17 PM
Let's have some fun, this beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick
Let's have some fun, this beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick

Huh!
Huh!

I wanna kiss you,
but if I do then I might miss you, babe
It's complicated and stupid
Got my ass squeezed by sexy Cupid
Guess he wants to play, wants to play
A lovegame, a lovegame

Hold me and love me
Just wanna touch you for a minute
Maybe three seconds is enough
For my heart to quit it

let's have some fun, this beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick
don't think too much, just bust that stick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game?
Doin' the lovegame

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game?
Doin' the lovegame

Huh!

I'm on a mission
and it involves some heavy touching, yeah
You've indicated your interest
I'm educated in sex, yes
And now I want it bad, want it bad
A lovegame, a lovegame

Hold me and love me
just want touch you for a minute
Maybe three seconds is enough
For my heart to quit it

Let's have some fun, this beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick
Don't think too much, just bust that stick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game?
Doin' the lovegame

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game?
Doin' the lovegame

Huh!

I can see you staring there from across the block
with a smile on your mouth and your hand on your huh
The story of us, it always starts the same
with a boy and a girl and a huh and a game
And a game (huh)
And a game (huh)
And a game (huh)
A lovegame!

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game?
Doin' the lovegame

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game?
Doin' the lovegame

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love
Or you want fame
Are you in the game (Let's have some fun this beat is sick)
Doin' the lovegame (I wanna take a ride on your disco stick)

Let's play a lovegame
Play a lovegame
Do you want love?
Or you want fame?
Are you in the game? (Don't think too much just bust that stick)
Doin' the lovegame (I wanna take a ride on your disco stick)

Huh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 02 October, 2010, 12:14:41 AM
Tuna smell and christmas pudding mixed together is still on my fingers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 October, 2010, 12:26:07 AM
That's what I call a good evening's work, Rog, but you better hope Santa doesn't find out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 02 October, 2010, 01:08:29 AM
There was a bowl that had had tuna that had been manually mixed with mayonnaise in it earlier in the week.

Mother had made the Christmas Pudding, and had put some shavings in this bowl. Presumably so that the base of the pudding could be flat. We already had a whole Christmas Pudding left over from last year's Christmas, but that's a whole other story.

Earlier in the week I had contemplated eating those shavings, but I was unsure about whether the bowl had been washed between it containing homemade tuna mayonnaise and homemade Christmas Pudding shavings.

Evidently, I must have forgotten this earlier deliberation as I ate all of the Christmas Pudding shavings about 90 minutes ago.

I wondered why my fingers felt somewhat sticky, and why they smelt of fish. A wipe from a J-Cloth did not alleviate these ailments.

Then I remembered why I hadn't eaten the Christmas Pudding shavings in the first place.

I washed my hands with Sanex hand wash. Then I realized that whilst in the bath earlier on I had inspected the Sanex bottle and realized that what I thought had been hand wash had actually been bath foam.

I did not fingerbang Mary Christmas in a manner reminiscent of Don Draper. That is a scurrilous accusation on your part, and I shall be informing the Club of Irishmen about it and we shall see how they see fit to respond to my entirely non-scurrilous [F]ac[t]cusation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 02 October, 2010, 10:20:47 AM
Im feeling very sick and sorry for myself, so im moving the following from the 'sometimes sort of okay' thread, where they really belong, to here. Just because, as i say, im feeling sorry for myself.

Firstly, that '4321' movie that's in your local video shop? That's co-directed by noel clarke and mark davis. I did media studies with mark, he was a good friend, and he and i went to one of the 'black sunday' horror festivals in london back in the early nineties. We also used to make camcorder movies together back in the day. He's made a proper movie and i havent.

Also, ive just heard that another good friend has been asked to paint the cover of 'Crabs: Apocalypse', the continuation of guy n smith's 'crabs' series.

I am feeling unsuccessful and rubbish.

SBT

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 October, 2010, 10:33:35 AM
Feeling rather ill with an infection which is spreading even after two weeks of ab's.  In fact it's making me feel really awful since yesterday.

Have to grin and bare it though as it's my sons birthday
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 October, 2010, 11:58:38 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 02 October, 2010, 10:20:47 AM
Im feeling very sick and sorry for myself, so im moving the following from the 'sometimes sort of okay' thread, where they really belong, to here. Just because, as i say, im feeling sorry for myself.

Firstly, that '4321' movie that's in your local video shop? That's co-directed by noel clarke and mark davis. I did media studies with mark, he was a good friend, and he and i went to one of the 'black sunday' horror festivals in london back in the early nineties. We also used to make camcorder movies together back in the day. He's made a proper movie and i havent.

Also, ive just heard that another good friend has been asked to paint the cover of 'Crabs: Apocalypse', the continuation of guy n smith's 'crabs' series.

I am feeling unsuccessful and rubbish.

SBT



Likewise.

I am not happy with my life at present.

I am not happy with where i am living.

I am not happy with my work because i am not getting enough of it

I am not happy that i am still waiting for a front of a building to be scaffolded and i am being pissed around by the scaffolder and i am that close to the client saying dont bother although they do realise its not my fault.If this job falls through i will have no work.There is more shit weather coming up which is going to delay everything even more.

I am not happy that there are scaffolders putting up scaffolding on a saturday morning up the front of the house behind.I knew this would happen but i didnt know it would be on Saturday morning and its making a hell of a row which is pissing me off.

There is someone else cutting something which is making a very loud high pitched whining noise.

I am going to have to go out as its purgatory.

I am not happy that the rest of my family are pissing off to Sri Lanka for a month and i am not because i am meant to be working and earning money except i am not for the reasons stated above.

My computer has a disc trapped inside it so it needs to go into a workshop and the constant - WHirrrr - Click - WHirrrr - Click - WHirr is driving me mental although it seems to have stopped temporarily.

I feel like i have mild depression.

I am deeply unhappy about the state of things in general and i have very deep concerns about where this country and others are going in the political sense.I wish i was like everyone else in the sense of being totally clueless and apathetic and disinterested about it but unfortunately i am not.I can switch off from it but that doesnt make the problem/s go away./

The church garden is going to be re-landscaped and its starting on Oct 13 and i am dreading it and i dont know what the end result of it is going to be and the company doing the work are complte and utter Wankers.

I am sick of it all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 02 October, 2010, 12:26:45 PM
I hear you Peter. My wife gets more and more successful in her career, mixing with more and more minor celebs, and im just feeling- well, basically shit. Need to do something to feed my desires! Hang in there, sir!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 October, 2010, 12:57:40 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 02 October, 2010, 12:26:45 PM
I hear you Peter. My wife gets more and more successful in her career, mixing with more and more minor celebs, and im just feeling- well, basically shit. Need to do something to feed my desires! Hang in there, sir!
SBT

Lets try and do that and do something asbout it.

I was up in London last weekend and i used to live up there myself and when i got home i said to my Dad that i dont feel like i am living properly now compared to how i used to live and its the same for my Mum and Dad as they have taken a hit in the manufactured recession and they are not happy either and i am not only unhappy about as i am also angry about it all as well.

There are people left right and centre losing out on everything they have worked and saved for and in some cases losing everything because of it.Its no joke and my future has been adversely affected by it .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 October, 2010, 12:58:39 PM
Hmmm. Yeah. It's like when you sign up with a tutoring agency that supplies cover for schools when teachers are off for training, illness or maternity leave. If you've got two crap A levels and a B.Ed. you can be employed to do teaching for £80 a day, but if you've got a Ph.D. and a PGCE for teaching post-16 all you can get outside of a sixth form college is babysitting for £50 a day. I can get that sticking the cardboard hanging labels on packaging in a warehouse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 02 October, 2010, 09:04:17 PM
I know it's against the law to lie on your cv and claim you have degrees that you don't but is it against the law to leave things off?

I still have a sore throat lingering long after the main tonsillitis cleared up. It's getting on my tits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 October, 2010, 11:33:51 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 02 October, 2010, 09:04:17 PM
I know it's against the law to lie on your cv and claim you have degrees that you don't but is it against the law to leave things off?

I still have a sore throat lingering long after the main tonsillitis cleared up. It's getting on my tits.


I'm pretty sure you don't need to put that on your CV  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 12:08:03 AM
Upon hearing of this Poundland Robocop DVD bonanza on this vey board I rang my sister. "Is there a Poundland anywhere around here?" I asked. I was assured that there was indeed a Poundland in the local shopping towns high street. I had never noticed it bt what the hell, if she knows anything she knows shopping.

I trudged into town today, and what an unpleasant day it was, puring down with rain, wind blowing, very nasty. Got there, searched up the high street, searched down the high street. There is a Poundstretcher. There is a Poundworld. There is no Poundland.

Turns out she'd been thinking of the Poundworld. I got very wet and very cold and had nothing to show for it.

I did at least have a nice lunch in Cafe Le Milf.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cthulouis on 03 October, 2010, 12:55:18 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 02 October, 2010, 09:04:17 PM
I know it's against the law to lie on your cv and claim you have degrees that you don't but is it against the law to leave things off?

The problem with leaving things off is that in interviews people will ask you things like "What were you doing with yourself in these missing years?"

I guess you could start tweaking the dates here and there, but those metaphorical tinned worms come to mind.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 03 October, 2010, 09:19:21 AM
Paul, simply because you made me laugh with 'cafe de milf', i will pop into poundland tomorrow and see if they have any robocop tv series dvds. If they do, i will buy them for you and post them on.
But last time i looked, when i mentioned it in the first place in fact, they only had one- vol three i think. Of course they may have had a delivery since then.

Of course, by delivery, i mean four fat chavs with swag bags, heaving them in the back door after dark.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 October, 2010, 11:00:49 AM
I've lost yet another memory stick  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 03 October, 2010, 11:06:11 AM
Can you remember where you had it last?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 October, 2010, 11:39:10 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 02 October, 2010, 09:04:17 PM
I know it's against the law to lie on your cv and claim you have degrees that you don't but is it against the law to leave things off?

I still have a sore throat lingering long after the main tonsillitis cleared up. It's getting on my tits.

Fill up any awkward gaps that are difficult to fill by saying that you were travelling as that cant be disproved or verified.

;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 03 October, 2010, 12:17:45 PM
QuoteCafe Le Milf.

Is that really its name?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 October, 2010, 12:19:32 PM
Although if I were interviewing somebody and they covered up gaps on their CV by saying they had spent the time 'travelling' I would presume they were a bit flaky and unreliable, and I would question the benefit of the experience and want to know what they had learnt from it and how that learning would be of use in the position they were being considered for.

If it actually said 'travelling' on the CV before I even got round to interviewing, the CV would most probably go in the bin before shortlisting. I've never been travelling myself, so I wouldn't see the benefit of it if I were an employer.

Now, if a candidate were to say they hadn't worked for a few years because they had been raising a family, that would make sense to me and I'd be able to see how someone might have developed important skills through the experience.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 03 October, 2010, 12:37:01 PM
....because Mrs Albion never did get her toast this morning as our cooker went up in flames.

Mrs Albion threw a wet towel over it and shut the kitchen door and we legged it outside and turned the gas off. The fire brigade said we did the right thing.

The cooker is dead of course and there is some minor smoke damage but nothing too bad and we lived to tell the tale. Now waiting for the insurance company to get back to us about a new cooker.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 October, 2010, 03:44:09 PM
MMmm. I'm just doing my CV now and it does have a year in the middle where I was travelling. Because, well, I was travelling.  I thought it better to put it than leave a gap and I even filled in teh details and said where (it's just one line).

What I don't like is this trend to have a load of bullet point bullshit at the start of the CV. "Proven communication skills", "Excellent Track Record of Team Leadership" etc.  Just doesn't feel right or British.


And SBT, don't worry too much about everybody getting more famous and successful than you.  I used to get a little pang in my heart everytime that somebody I worked with on teh comedy circuit made it to fame but now it bothers me not a jot (in fact, good on 'em). 

Mainly because I can see that most of the people that made it have put *a lot* of work into getting there (and had to put up with a lot  of crap and rubbish).  And most of them are nice people (or they were when I met them) who deserve it (Simon Pegg, Lucy Porter, Frankie Boyle). And a lot of them have also ended up completely wrecking elements of their life to get there.  If I'd followed that path and thrown myself into it completely, I wouldn't be here now with Mrs Tips and the various sauropodlets.*





* I'd be shagging page 3 burds, snorting coke and rolling around on a bed of fifty pound notes 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 October, 2010, 03:47:23 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 03 October, 2010, 03:44:09 PM
* I'd be shagging page 3 burds 

I had to look twice then, as I was worried that you had written that you would be shagging me. Then I realised that an 'i' was missing  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 October, 2010, 03:53:02 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 03 October, 2010, 12:19:32 PM
Although if I were interviewing somebody and they covered up gaps on their CV by saying they had spent the time 'travelling' I would presume they were a bit flaky and unreliable, and I would question the benefit of the experience and want to know what they had learnt from it and how that learning would be of use in the position they were being considered for.

If it actually said 'travelling' on the CV before I even got round to interviewing, the CV would most probably go in the bin before shortlisting. I've never been travelling myself, so I wouldn't see the benefit of it if I were an employer.

Now, if a candidate were to say they hadn't worked for a few years because they had been raising a family, that would make sense to me and I'd be able to see how someone might have developed important skills through the experience.

It seems like we disagree here on this because i have travelled and it had nothing to do with my work whatsoever and not only that there are quite a few gaps when i wasnt doing very much and i would rather not be asked what i was doing.

I have never written out a CV and anyway with what i do you are judged purely on your work and how well you can do it as anything else like what i do in my spare time is totally irrelevent. Checkable references are important as well but thats about it and being able to work on your initiative and an active interest in the work.

Thats all i would be interested in as an employer and i would screen potential employees with a questionaire of 50 random questions that are elementary or maybe even 100.

This is because you get chancers and if they cant answer the majority of the questions correctly then they will be disregarded.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 October, 2010, 04:47:49 PM
I wouldn't hire anyone that listed a year-or-more's traveling on their CV because I'm a vindictive jealous so-and-so.

I'm lying of course: people that have actually seen a chunk of the world and done interesting stuff while doing it often bring useful ideas and experience back with them, not least some notion of what they want from life .  I watched my brother blossom from a slobby druggy miserabilist to a hyperfit confident contented man when his peripatetic life finally collided with somewhere he truly wanted to be. For myself, I foolishly chose work over travel, always thinking that I'd get a bit further along with developing the business so i could leave someone else in charge for a year, then there was a mortgage and children and now no business to speak of.  However, I am supremely happily married and enkidded, and I've done a lot of intensive local traveling in the three weeks a year I managed to steal over the 'boom' years, and I'm certainly not going to begrudge anyone the chance of doing things differently.

Note: 6 months hanging around the Irish bars of Bondi, Long Island or Phuket does not count as 'travel'.

What I do hate in a CV is the aforementioned "i am so great" list and "personal mission statement" at the start.  Every time I read "I work equally well in a team or independently" and "I have excellent communication skills"  I find myself thinking "I'll be the judge of that", which is a bit unfair since kids are forced into writing that shit these days.  If I 'm honest I generally look at CVs for evidence that someone doesn't mind getting stuck into whatever kind of work presents itself - I have a morbid mistrust of "career path" CVs - much happier to see 6 months in a fish cannery or a year with the forestry service than ten unbroken years of ladder-climbing.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 October, 2010, 04:55:04 PM
I'm just having to write that bit now.  Apparently I do have "Excellent Communication Skills" (or so my feedback keeps telling me) but it just feels so wrong to stick it up front on the CV. Especially as every fucker that quite blatantly does not, puts it on theirs next to their "proven ability to work under pressure and rapidly learn new skills". 

I almost feel like sticking "except in c.v. writing and interviews" as an addendum. And that might help qualify my "Good Humoured" comment as well.

As for my faults, I guess I'm just "a perfectionist and a workaholic". ;o)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 05:16:35 PM
On a course I recently attended we were repeatedly told that we absolutely should leave things off our cv's if they were qualifications not needed for the job because employers are wary of overqualified people being unmotivated in jobs they feel to be beneath them.This didn't apply to me of course because I'm not over-qualified for anything.

In my last interview I was asked about weaknesses and I said 'lack of ambition'. I explained that I didn't see that as a weakness but that my previous employer had so I thought I should mention it. 

What I meant was that I have no great desire to climb any ladders or do lots of courses with an eye to self-improvement and getting promotions. I am perfectly happy being quite low in an organization so long as I am trusted to do the job and the work is appreciated.  I went on to explain that I thought this should be an attitude that employers would like, given that their are only so many promotion prospects in-house so they would inevitably lose ambitious types to other firms and also any climbers or leavers have to be replaced and the replacements trained etc.

I stressed that not wanting to climb the ladder did not mean I wasn't willing to work bloody hard on the bottom rungs and a couple of people like me could be the 'core' of a team when others were coming and going. I thought I made sense but it was obvious he wasn't buying it. 

Perfectionist and workaholic it may have to be next time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 October, 2010, 06:04:28 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 03 October, 2010, 03:44:09 PM
MMmm. I'm just doing my CV now and it does have a year in the middle where I was travelling. Because, well, I was travelling.

I think you can be allowed one year! Anything more says 'slacker.'

Quote from: TordelBack on 03 October, 2010, 04:47:49 PM
If I 'm honest I generally look at CVs for evidence that someone doesn't mind getting stuck into whatever kind of work presents itself - I have a morbid mistrust of "career path" CVs - much happier to see 6 months in a fish cannery or a year with the forestry service than ten unbroken years of ladder-climbing.

Oh, you'd like mine then. I've never got more than a single rung up any ladder I've been on!

Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 05:16:35 PM
What I meant was that I have no great desire to climb any ladders or do lots of courses with an eye to self-improvement and getting promotions.

For that they tick the box marked 'lazy.' Truth.

Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 05:16:35 PM
Perfectionist and workaholic it may have to be next time.

They hate perfectionists. No time for that. Workaholics are popular though, especially if you'll do it for £5.80 an hour, plus a bit of unpaid on top.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 03 October, 2010, 10:31:01 PM
I found out that my late uncle had been buying 2000AD since his teens and then his brother continued to do so, after I mentioned in passing to my mum that I had started reading Judge Dredd again. She always has said we would of got on once my interests flourished in my teens, unfortunately he died before that ever happened. And I think all those progs just got thrown out. I would of loved to have had those, as much for the sentimental value as the content itself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 11:13:08 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 03 October, 2010, 09:19:21 AM
Paul, simply because you made me laugh...
SBT

Hadn't noticed this before. Cheers SBT.   I actually have to go a bit further afield at some point in the week (pilgrimage to registry/registrar? office to get a copy of my birth certificate. apparently they charge about a tenner! One more thing to blame my mother for) so I'll have a scout around and see if there is a pound;and in the city in question.

I know the chances of actually finding these specific DVDs are slim but to be honest, it had never occured to me that those kinds os shops would sell DVDs at all so im bound to find something to fill my boots with.

Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 03 October, 2010, 12:17:45 PM
QuoteCafe Le Milf.

Is that really its name?

Yes, yes it is. Or rather, no. It should be though. From the owner on down, there isn't a single member od staff that doesn't qualify.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 October, 2010, 11:31:14 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 11:13:08 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 03 October, 2010, 09:19:21 AM
Paul, simply because you made me laugh...
SBT

Hadn't noticed this before. Cheers SBT.   I actually have to go a bit further afield at some point in the week (pilgrimage to registry/registrar? office to get a copy of my birth certificate. apparently they charge about a tenner! One more thing to blame my mother for) so I'll have a scout around and see if there is a pound;and in the city in question.

I know the chances of actually finding these specific DVDs are slim but to be honest, it had never occured to me that those kinds os shops would sell DVDs at all so im bound to find something to fill my boots with.

Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 03 October, 2010, 12:17:45 PM
QuoteCafe Le Milf.

Is that really its name?

Yes, yes it is. Or rather, no. It should be though. From the owner on down, there isn't a single member od staff that doesn't qualify.

Here you go :

Poundland Store Locator :

http://www.poundland.co.uk/store-finder/

No more time wasted.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 03 October, 2010, 11:44:01 PM
You see, this is why the internet is wasted on me. It just wouldn't have occured to me to look for something like that.Cheers Peter.

Of course my laptop is choosing this very minute to play up and refuse to load any new sites - this one and twitter are running at the minute and even they are on a go slow - but I shall be on the library screen tomorrow (for that very reason, my laptop is struggling with Google maps and I need to find out whereabouts in the city the birth certificate place actually is) and shall peruse that link then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2010, 01:30:35 AM
And I'm sure you can obtain a copy of your birth certificate without leaving the house. Unless you have to send your request and payment by post. But I doubt it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 04 October, 2010, 09:36:19 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 October, 2010, 01:30:35 AM
And I'm sure you can obtain a copy of your birth certificate without leaving the house. Unless you have to send your request and payment by post. But I doubt it.


This one is more of a problem. My life is lived with cash at the moment. I have no way of paying any kind of fee online.

I make myself feel better by telling myself that at least it gets me out and about a bit more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 October, 2010, 12:19:43 PM
I have been invited to a funeral but i didnt realise it was this afternoon so its really short notice and i dont know if i want to go.There is a wake afterwards in Seaford as well.

I wish i had been given more notice and not only that i have mixed feelings about funerals for various reasons.The funeral and rememberence service is for Don Partridge and there will probably be interesting people attending it but its ridiculous that i get 1 hours + 10 minutes notice to prepare as its starting at 1.30 pm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 04 October, 2010, 04:51:21 PM
I have no fucking clue what to do for my final outcome in art.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 October, 2010, 05:08:16 PM
Quote from: Inev on 04 October, 2010, 04:51:21 PM
I have no fucking clue what to do for my final outcome in art.
A giant robot fighting a pterodactyl on the Moon.

Easy. Who's next for the doctor's surgery?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 October, 2010, 05:17:11 PM
Take some pictures of your teacher in the bath and apply some filters. ET FUCKING VOILA.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 04 October, 2010, 05:41:17 PM
There's a guy in my college class who is essentially a hyperactive shaved chimpanzee who needs constant attention, sings loudly when you're trying to concentrate, throws things around, comes in drunk and rowdy, actually plays on his chair because the wheels amaze him so much and generally is making it difficult for me to focus at all. Lecturers don't seem to be bothering with it and the one who did say something to him got the response "I've got ADHD" and from then on has left him to it.

I'm hesitant to say anything because I seem to be the old fogey of the class and I don't want to come across as such, but today I actually got hit in the back of the neck with a spitball. A spitball. A fucking spitball. He apologised and said he'd been aiming for someone else, which of course makes it absolutely acceptable behaviour. What an everlasting cock-end that man is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 October, 2010, 05:57:39 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 04 October, 2010, 05:08:16 PM
A giant robot fighting a pterodactyl on the Moon.

That seems a bit unfair on the Pterodactyl, as its whole offensive capability is based around aerodynamic flight, and in that respect the moon really is a harsh mistress.  So it would have to have a jetpack, or be in a huge pressurised dome, which adds a whole other layer to the work.  It's a good job I got here before you started the piece, Nev.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 04 October, 2010, 06:56:07 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 04 October, 2010, 05:08:16 PM
A giant robot fighting a pterodactyl on the Moon.

(http://c.imagehost.org/0634/Picture_8.png)
Watercolour on envelope.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2010, 07:01:34 PM
Quote from: Inev on 04 October, 2010, 04:51:21 PM
I have no fucking clue what to do for my final outcome in art.

I don't know what a final outcome is, but isn't it cheating to decide that first and then see what the steps in the creative process are that get you there?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: nev on 04 October, 2010, 07:04:01 PM
Well; I don't know what I'm working towards for it.
I've got an idea now, and I'm going to do work based on it, see how that turns out, and then maybe make my final piece based on said work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2010, 07:05:32 PM
Giant robot vs pterodactyl it is, then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 October, 2010, 07:25:27 PM
Hank Venture lost his virginity at a younger age than me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 October, 2010, 07:47:54 PM
Quote from: Inev on 04 October, 2010, 07:04:01 PMI've got an idea now, and I'm going to do work based on it, see how that turns out, and then maybe make my final piece based on said work.

Well if you can't even be bothered to give the Pterodactyl a fighting chance I wouldn't hold out much hope for a good grade.  Unless of course your art address the fundamental inequalities inherent in globalisation and the alienation that differential access to technology is responsible for in today's society.  Wow, that's pretty deep, man!  Now if you were to produce it entirely in the medium of poo sourced from the executive restrooms of the City of London, I could see a Turner Prize your future.  Actually scratch that, you haven't a chance:  that robot is pretty well drawn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 October, 2010, 08:09:41 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 04 October, 2010, 07:47:54 PM
Well if you can't even be bothered to give the Pterodactyl a fighting chance I wouldn't hold out much hope for a good grade.  Unless of course your art address the fundamental inequalities inherent in globalisation and the alienation that differential access to technology is responsible for in today's society.

Torchwood did it.

(http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs16/f/2007/178/4/d/Cyberwoman_vs_Pterodactyl_by_acegirl.jpg)

fan art by ~acegirl. Says she spent a month painting that, so appreciate it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 October, 2010, 09:45:19 PM
Don't listen to boring old facty Tordel. Art is its own truth* and the energy and emotion expressed in your piece is frightening in its intensity. And it even has a crater. Love it!


* Except when it comes to the number of links on Dredd's chain obviously.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 05 October, 2010, 02:08:08 PM
I just met my rude belligerant and offensive neighbour for the first time and it didnt go very well at all but this individual doesnt live in the Mews as he is from the house on the corner of an adjacent street so technically he is still an neighbour.He is the son of Audrey who died and he has inherited the property and is renovating it.

Anyway i went out of the gate to inspect a section of the party wall that belongs to the mews behind mine as i am doing a repair on it on behalf of my neighbour Geoff who lives in the Mews behind mine.Anyway there was a BMW parked on my/our private bit of land which is used as a parking space.I immediately noticed the contemptious look he was giving me for no reason which was provocative as i was poking around in the wall looking at my work checking that the muck hadnt been washed off by the rain.

Anyway i ignored him and then thought i would go back into the courtyard and then go out again and do the same thing to see what happens.Anyway this guy does the same thing again so i was curious what his problem was so i asked him politely "Are you stopping there for long ??"

The response i got was "Fuck Off !!" so i explained that its private land which is made clear by the signage.He tried to argue but it was pointless and by this point i was beginning to get wound up.His response was to laugh so i said that i wanted his car moved right there and then and if it wasnt moved it would be towed or clamped.Each time i said something he replied with "I AM LAUGHING !!" - "I AM LAUGHING !!" - "I AM LAUGHING !!" etc etc.Anyway i had to raise my voice by this point to say that i was going out for 10minutes and if his POS car and himself were not gone by the time i got home there would be a problem then he wouldnt be laughing.Fithy ugly overweight slob.If he wants a fight he can have one because i enjoy it.

I didnt like the look of him at all and he is obviously the bullying type as he looks like a Football yob.

He starts claiming he owns the wall which is wrong because it is a party wall.

Anyway i left the scene and came back 10 minutes later as promised and i caught him as he was driving away so he slammed his foot on the brake and wound the window down and shouted "OI !!!" and i thought here we go again....... but he didnt do very much as he already knew i meant business so i told him straight not to F with me and i said i dont want to see you or your car on this property EVER AGAIN !! EVER !!!

>:( >:(

And that was it so i think he has got the message.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 05 October, 2010, 09:51:41 PM
due to a depression thing rather than cutting myself  i ended up cutting my hair despite the fact ive been trying to grow it for ages . snipped a stray bit and couldnt stop so have had to go and get it sorted out so its a lot shorter now and i look like j jonah jameson jr . oh well,my own fault try again and hide the scissors  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 October, 2010, 09:58:53 PM
Darlin' don't you go and cut your hair
Do you think it's gonna make him change?
"i'm just a boy with a new haircut"
And that's a pretty nice haircut
Charge it like a puzzle, hit me wearin' muzzles
Hesitate to die, look around, around, the second drummer's drowned
His telephone is found

Music scene is crazy, bands start up each and every day
I saw another one just the other day
A special new band
I remember lying
I don't remember a line
I don't remember a word
But I don't care, I care, I really don't care
Did you see the drummer's hair?

Advertising looks and chops a must
No big hair!!
Songs mean a lot
When songs are bought
And so are you-
Bitch, rant down to the practice room
Attention and fame so
Career, career, career....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 05 October, 2010, 10:02:54 PM
you always know the right things to say , :wave: hugs xxx
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 October, 2010, 07:54:47 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 05 October, 2010, 09:51:41 PM
i look like j jonah jameson jr .

At least you'll look good chomping on a stogie.  And how many of us can say that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2010, 01:15:47 PM
Got me one of those faulty copies of Freedom. http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/oct/03/jonathan-franzen-pulped-fiction

I'm in two minds whether to send it back or not.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 06 October, 2010, 05:46:10 PM
Just got a new 37 inch HDTV for the lounge....the missus reckons it looks no bigger than our old set (26 inch) ::). No willie jokes, please.  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 06 October, 2010, 06:29:51 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 06 October, 2010, 05:46:10 PM
Just got a new 37 inch HDTV for the lounge....the missus reckons it looks no bigger than our old set (26 inch) ::). No willie jokes, please.  :lol:

What can you do eh? We went from 28 to 37 and it seemed comically enormous for the first few days (then it started shrinking as they do), so I can't believe she's not in awe of its vastness right now.

My minor impediment of that day is the new Left 4 Dead dlc, "The Sacrifice". Going to be without broadband next week due to a move so thought I'd make the most of the bandwidth while I had it so downloaded this, and apparently its ok on PC but for me its horribly broken.

Any objects, props or surfaces made of metal or wood don't have collision, chargers and tanks belt you halfway across the map because you pass through everything. Speaking of tanks, the Tanks spawn with the Hunter character model for some reason, the 2 team members controlled by AI were skating around and T-posing for the whole session and the campaign can't be completed because halfway through stage 2 you have to walk along a metal bridge. Which obviously you fall straight through. Please fix it Valve. Please.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 October, 2010, 06:47:25 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2010, 01:15:47 PM
Got me one of those faulty copies of Freedom. http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/oct/03/jonathan-franzen-pulped-fiction

I'm in two minds whether to send it back or not.

Send back half of the book and keep the other half yourself.

Problem solved  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 October, 2010, 07:05:44 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 October, 2010, 01:15:47 PM
Got me one of those faulty copies of Freedom. http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/oct/03/jonathan-franzen-pulped-fiction

I'm in two minds whether to send it back or not.

You should keep it and wait to buy the omnibus edition.  Then you could say you also have one with The Corrections.  Wakka wakka wakka.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 06 October, 2010, 09:20:37 PM
Got really fed up trying to buy a new cooker after ours went up in flames at the weekend. Looks like Tesco are going to be the closest to our insurance claim for what we want.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 October, 2010, 09:57:20 PM
Quote from: Albion on 06 October, 2010, 09:20:37 PM
Got really fed up trying to buy a new cooker after ours went up in flames at the weekend. Looks like Tesco are going to be the closest to our insurance claim for what we want.

Have you ever thought of buying a secondhand replacement ??

Thats what i would be doing but it does depend on how your insurance company is handling the claim and if you are simply being given a cheque to spend as you please.A lot of insurance companies stipulate this or that or the other but generally speaking you get a lot more for your money if you buy something nearly new.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 06 October, 2010, 10:14:55 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 06 October, 2010, 09:57:20 PM
Have you ever thought of buying a secondhand replacement ??

Sorted now, just got to wait for delivery and installation. Insurance company were quite good and sorted it quickly. We'd rather have new than secondhand. Having seen one go up in flames I don't want to get a used cooker that might be unsafe. At least we acted quickly and efficently and no one was hurt and very little damage was done.
Just got a bit fed up visiting three major retailers to look at three different cookers they have online but only one model was in one shop. Mrs Albion likes to look at what she is buying, this is fair enough as she does all the cooking. In the end we got a cooker we looked at in Comet online from Tesco for £26 less than Currys and £61 less than Comet!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 October, 2010, 10:16:24 PM
Quote from: Albion on 06 October, 2010, 09:20:37 PM
Got really fed up trying to buy a new cooker after ours went up in flames at the weekend. Looks like Tesco are going to be the closest to our insurance claim for what we want.

I believe CrazyFoxMachine knows someone who can help with that very problem!

http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,27612.msg549981.html#msg549981
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Aaron A Aardvark on 06 October, 2010, 10:29:53 PM
My fish tank burst and dumped 50 litres of water on my carpet.

And my socks keep getting wet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 October, 2010, 10:45:03 PM
Quote from: Aaron A Aardvark on 06 October, 2010, 10:29:53 PM
My fish tank burst and dumped 50 litres of water on my carpet.

And my socks keep getting wet.
I hope it hasn't affected your soles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 October, 2010, 11:06:34 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 October, 2010, 10:45:03 PM
Quote from: Aaron A Aardvark on 06 October, 2010, 10:29:53 PM
My fish tank burst and dumped 50 litres of water on my carpet.

And my socks keep getting wet.
I hope it hasn't affected your soles.

or your 'eels for that matter
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 October, 2010, 11:32:43 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 06 October, 2010, 11:06:34 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 October, 2010, 10:45:03 PM
Quote from: Aaron A Aardvark on 06 October, 2010, 10:29:53 PM
My fish tank burst and dumped 50 litres of water on my carpet.

And my socks keep getting wet.
I hope it hasn't affected your soles.
or your 'eels for that matter
I set that one up on porpoise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 October, 2010, 11:34:45 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 October, 2010, 10:45:03 PM
Quote from: Aaron A Aardvark on 06 October, 2010, 10:29:53 PM
My fish tank burst and dumped 50 litres of water on my carpet.

And my socks keep getting wet.
I hope it hasn't affected your soles.

How many feet of water ?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 07 October, 2010, 06:00:15 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 06 October, 2010, 11:34:45 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 October, 2010, 10:45:03 PM
Quote from: Aaron A Aardvark on 06 October, 2010, 10:29:53 PM
My fish tank burst and dumped 50 litres of water on my carpet.

And my socks keep getting wet.
I hope it hasn't affected your soles.

How many feet of water ?



oh,for cod's skate give it a rest ,this isnt the plaice...


and to get back on track...

misery guts,our neighbour only comes round when she wants something usually involving money,this time its fence panels the best one was when she wanted to put a fence up at the front its an open plan estate so everyone going to her house goes up our drive to get to hers house even though they have to pass her driveway/path to do so,it would just mean they have to pass beneath her window we declined and came home to a monstrosity of a wrought iron fence that goes halfway down the drive with gold tips on it and i swear the "craftsman " who made it was pissed when he painted it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 08 October, 2010, 01:20:32 AM
A loose bit of toenail that has been giving me some grief has been involuntarily torn off after I banged it on something. ouch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 08 October, 2010, 01:24:27 AM
I almost ate a pea-sized poppy head that was hidden among the peas in a Birds Eye chicken dinner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 October, 2010, 01:25:03 AM
I have cramp in my toes or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 09:17:42 AM
I made a sausage casserole and left the oven on all night.

So that's 12 hours @ 180o = Fucking huge electricity bill. At least the kitchen was toasty warm as I made my breakfast.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 October, 2010, 09:28:29 AM
SYLVIAPLATHDONTDARE
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 08 October, 2010, 09:30:01 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 08 October, 2010, 09:28:29 AM
SYLVIAPLATHDONTDARE

How so? Because he always looks on the bright side? ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 09:32:20 AM
I think it's a 'head in the oven' reference. Or he may just be drunk early today.  :D

Saw Sylvia's grave this summer at Hebden Bridge. Covered in pens, trinkets and bad teenage poetry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 08 October, 2010, 09:53:22 AM
QuoteCovered in pens, trinkets and bad teenage poetry.

In death, as in life...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 08 October, 2010, 10:19:04 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 09:32:20 AM
Saw Sylvia's grave this summer at Hebden Bridge. Covered in pens, trinkets and bad teenage poetry.

Hebden Bridge?? The back end of nowhere?? Is that where she's buried?

EDIT: Well, I suppose it is quiet...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 11:10:08 AM
Quote from: uncle fester on 08 October, 2010, 10:19:04 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 09:32:20 AM
Saw Sylvia's grave this summer at Hebden Bridge. Covered in pens, trinkets and bad teenage poetry.

Hebden Bridge?? The back end of nowhere?? Is that where she's buried?

EDIT: Well, I suppose it is quiet...

Oi, don't knock HB! It's a lovely little town with one of the best social clubs & live music venues around, the wonderful Hebden Bridge Trades Club. In the same graveyard (which is actually next door in Heptonstall) I noticed several fairly new graves that had been adorned with cans of special brew, bottles of San Miguel and cigarettes. Shortly after, I heard of a documentary doing the cinema rounds about young local alcoholics and drug addicts, prompted by a spate of deaths.

It's also a hotbed of lesbianism apparently, partly thanks to Sylvia!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 08 October, 2010, 11:17:44 AM
I've a cold rapidly developing. I can't remember the last time I had a cold,but I've got that once removed, slightly stoned feeling. So it's not all bad.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 08 October, 2010, 11:22:11 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare
Quote from: uncle fester
Quote from: Dandontdare
Saw Sylvia's grave this summer at Hebden Bridge. Covered in pens, trinkets and bad teenage poetry.

Hebden Bridge?? The back end of nowhere?? Is that where she's buried?

EDIT: Well, I suppose it is quiet...

Oi, don't knock HB!

It's where Ted Hughes' old cottage is (and presumably where she topped herself). You too can stay there thanks to the Arvon Foundation (http://www.arvonfoundation.org/course.php?genre=&tutor=&month=&centre=2), which I did about ten years ago.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 11:39:36 AM
Quote from: Banners on 08 October, 2010, 11:22:11 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare
Quote from: uncle fester
Quote from: Dandontdare
Saw Sylvia's grave this summer at Hebden Bridge. Covered in pens, trinkets and bad teenage poetry.

Hebden Bridge?? The back end of nowhere?? Is that where she's buried?

EDIT: Well, I suppose it is quiet...

Oi, don't knock HB!

It's where Ted Hughes' old cottage is (and presumably where she topped herself). You too can stay there thanks to the Arvon Foundation (http://www.arvonfoundation.org/course.php?genre=&tutor=&month=&centre=2), which I did about ten years ago.

M@

S'right. The grave used to be regularly vandalised by angry feminists 'cos it said Sylvia Plath-Hughes - They used to chisel off the name Hughes, leaving only the Plath, on account of him being such a bastard to her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 08 October, 2010, 12:17:06 PM
Sorry, I grew up up that way. I have a slightly biased memory of it. Not as much fun being a moody teenager as a interested tourist, perhaps  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 12:28:21 PM
Quote from: uncle fester on 08 October, 2010, 12:17:06 PM
Sorry, I grew up up that way. I have a slightly biased memory of it. Not as much fun being a moody teenager as a interested tourist, perhaps  :)

Ha ha, true. I love the place, and would happilly move there if I had the money and didn't have to commute to work. It looks beautiful, has nice pubs (and the aforementioned Trades Club), it's on a handy railway line, a more lefty/bohemian population than a lot of small towns, and it's set in stunning countryside.

Did you hear about the film I mentioned (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/this-britain/why-has-hebden-bridge-become-suicide-central-1811034.html (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/this-britain/why-has-hebden-bridge-become-suicide-central-1811034.html))? It's not something a visitor would notice about the place, though there were a lot of youths drinking in the park last time I was there. Interesting mention in that article about "valley bottom fever".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 08 October, 2010, 02:01:53 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2010, 09:17:42 AM
I made a sausage casserole and left the oven on all night.

So that's 12 hours @ 180o = Fucking huge electricity bill. At least the kitchen was toasty warm as I made my breakfast.

Yeah, I cleaned my teeth the other day and went to work, leaving the tap running.
Not looking forward to the water bill.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 08 October, 2010, 08:03:09 PM
A certain acquaintance of my girlfriend happened to stumble upon the subject of physical attraction and felt the need to point out my lack of it, saying I'm a bit chubby, and fat isn't exactly nice to look at. Now I am no oil painting thats for sure and saying I am a bit chubby is probably putting it lightly, but I'd rather the cheeky twat keep his opinions too himself from now on, especially knowing in the past he has made, to me at least, some inappropriate remarks about her as well. Now I am all for having an opinion but take umbrage with plain old rude pricks. I havent done anything that I know of to him, I also felt he seemed unnecessarily rude when I was chatting to him the other day, coming across as hostile for no reason which I pointed out to him. Something that pisses me off beyond belief, maybe its just me and my tolerance of people and their shit is rapidly dwindling.  ;)

Anyway sorry for the rant again everyone becoming a bit of a bad habit  :-[  Now in my time I have developed a rather thick skin when it comes to comments about me, but this was an instance where I felt it was really unnecessary and petty to stoop to that level. Oh well, not reason enough to give the bastard a good hiding, shame  ;) :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 08 October, 2010, 08:14:54 PM
He fancies her. Punch him.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 08 October, 2010, 08:30:34 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 08 October, 2010, 08:14:54 PM
He fancies her. Punch him.
SBT

It's obvious innit? He basically admitted as much a while ago, problem is I would have to travel down to Coventry to do it and I really doubt she would be happy about it  :lol: He is one of those types who has a thing for a number of people though so I'm not too worried. It's all rather complicated because its a long distance thing. He just wants "a girl" I want this girl, I've never really been one to follow the "women are vaginas on legs waiting to be plundered" train of thought. She knows that so I am not panicking just yet. And after all I am the one seeing her in a weeks time

She seemed rather pissed off about what he said as well though anyway so I'll keep my hair on for now  ;)

I am probably being a little unfair considering he has aspergers as well but Its not suddenly an excuse to be a knobhead now is it?  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 October, 2010, 11:56:07 PM
The radio edit of "Fuck You" to "Forget You" really saps the fun out of that song.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 October, 2010, 09:33:59 AM
QuoteThe radio edit of "Fuck You" to "Forget You" really saps the fun out of that song.

Indeed, but I may be able to offer you some solace at this difficult time.

I awoke this morning with the perfect realisation that I am a complete fucking arsehole.  This was markedly different from the usual nagging feeling that this may be the case, in that it came bundled with a clear epistemology, a strong logical argument and copious (oh so copious)  supporting data.  Isn't the subconscious a wonder.  A complete reworking of my priorities is needed, and so it's adieu for the immediate.  Until next time, may your Transformers never ship in less than C-9 condition.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 October, 2010, 11:05:00 AM
QuoteI awoke this morning with the perfect realisation that I am a complete fucking arsehole.  This was markedly different from the usual nagging feeling that this may be the case, in that it came bundled with a clear epistemology, a strong logical argument and copious (oh so copious)  supporting data.  Isn't the subconscious a wonder.  A complete reworking of my priorities is needed, and so it's adieu for the immediate.  Until next time, may your Transformers never ship in less than C-9 condition.

Wow. Are you sure? You always seemed a decent sort to me, TB. I had a similar realisation a few years ago. Managed to sort myself out though, through a combination of Eckhart Tolle's stuff and and Landmark education (an extremely harrowing personal development course that I didn't finish and whose methods I have  lot of objections to, but it did rid me of a lot of arseholeish tendencies).  There's also a book which I think was called Dark Nights of the Soul that I read, which although was written from a religious stance that I don't have helped me to accept the shitty tendencies that I had shied away from.

I was going to post that I had accidentally filled my moped with diesel, but that's only a fixable machine and TB's is a much more serious issue.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 October, 2010, 11:49:39 AM
Excuse the double post, but I just thought I'd better add that the above doesn't mean I don't still have quite a few prick-ish tendencies. But i try a bit harder to recognise them these days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 October, 2010, 01:27:50 PM
Boarders with small children will be familiar with their annoying habit of repeating stuff you'd wish they didnt.

Last week i accidentally taught my five year old 'shit' and 'bollocks' in rapid succession, which didnt go down well with my wife.

However, nothing compares to standing outside your son's bedroom door and hearing his tiny voice singing the following. If youre familiar with Balamory, youll know the tune.

Im PC Plum and i like it up the bum
Im a policeman and i'll always be your friend.
With my magnifying glass
And my big fat hairy arse
I look for all the bees and birds and mice.

Shit. And indeed, bollocks.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 10 October, 2010, 12:05:01 PM
Bloody hell TB, hope everything works out.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 11 October, 2010, 08:11:59 PM
Yeah completely good luck Tordelback. Hope whatever the issues are get resolved positively and when ya ready you feel its cool to return. This place will be a lot poor for your absence.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 11 October, 2010, 08:25:25 PM
Just been pointed to this and I'll add my heartfelt hope that you can work your way through this TB. Far from being a "complete fucking arsehole" you have always struck me as a prince among men, and the well humored manner in which you have weathered tribulations that would have buckled lesser men is an inspiration.

Good luck mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 11 October, 2010, 08:35:17 PM
Hope you feel better about things soon TB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 11 October, 2010, 08:37:30 PM
Aye TB, hope whatever you're working through works out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 11 October, 2010, 09:26:24 PM
After the cooker went up in flames the insurance is sorted and I then go and order the wrong colour. Mrs Albion was a little disappointed at this.  :'(

Today it was delivered during the agreed slot but the drokking installation guy never turned up.  >:(
Arse!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 October, 2010, 12:46:27 AM
They make cookers in different colours???  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 October, 2010, 01:02:07 AM
I make your mom into different colours.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 13 October, 2010, 08:12:50 AM
The latest printing of FQ15 (Gibson Quarter cover) has been discovered to have a mighty huge printing error which means I'm very unlikely to have any for this weekend. Which is a spug as I was hoping to shift more copies with it being part of the the Sci-Fi art book!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: LARF on 13 October, 2010, 08:47:48 AM
Bolt - bring 'em with you I'll buy a copy, a misprint will be worth a fortune in years to come!

Come on you've got to tell us what's wrong with them, you can't keep us on tender hooks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 13 October, 2010, 09:04:31 AM
Larf- The coversheet is fine- however the interior pages are all from something Wicked 05.

Thanks go to SBT for noticing this- when he got the copy he'd just bought :(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 13 October, 2010, 10:02:55 AM
Bloody thrillsuckers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 13 October, 2010, 10:14:39 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 09 October, 2010, 09:33:59 AM
QuoteThe radio edit of "Fuck You" to "Forget You" really saps the fun out of that song.

Indeed, but I may be able to offer you some solace at this difficult time.

I awoke this morning with the perfect realisation that I am a complete fucking arsehole.  This was markedly different from the usual nagging feeling that this may be the case, in that it came bundled with a clear epistemology, a strong logical argument and copious (oh so copious)  supporting data.  Isn't the subconscious a wonder.  A complete reworking of my priorities is needed, and so it's adieu for the immediate.  Until next time, may your Transformers never ship in less than C-9 condition.

If you are, which from your postings here your not, you shouldn't listen to arseholes, the best bit of advice I ever got was 'don't beat yorself up about it' and it's true, there are plenty other aresholes outthere willing to do that, no use in helping them!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 13 October, 2010, 05:30:08 PM
TB - I always got the opposite impression of you. I hope it works out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 October, 2010, 05:36:27 PM
While driving to work last night, I was overtaken by two fire engines as I approached a fixed speed camera. I slowed down to 22mph as the first engine passed me and we both entered the marked area. Strangely, as he sped through at more than 30mph and then left the trap I was flashed in the bloody trap.

HOW DOES THAT WORK  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 October, 2010, 06:17:30 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 October, 2010, 05:36:27 PM
While driving to work last night, I was overtaken by two fire engines as I approached a fixed speed camera. I slowed down to 22mph as the first engine passed me and we both entered the marked area. Strangely, as he sped through at more than 30mph and then left the trap I was flashed in the bloody trap.

HOW DOES THAT WORK  ::)

As you have a Blackbox in the truck it will prove that you werent over the speed limit so if you are ticketed they will have to capitulate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 October, 2010, 06:55:34 PM
This was in my car Peter.
I can't wait to see what happens, as at last I will be able to battle to the death with the powers that be  :D



Obviously it's their death I'm on about!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 13 October, 2010, 07:41:28 PM
Xbox died today, just as I need to sit in for 2 days straight waiting for furniture being delivered! EEK! Only a minor impediment because it gave me an excuse to buy a nice new shiny slinky one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 13 October, 2010, 09:54:48 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 October, 2010, 06:55:34 PM
I can't wait to see what happens, as at last I will be able to battle to the death with the powers that be  :D

Sort it out, CF! Make them prove it was you and not a fire engine that did it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 13 October, 2010, 10:45:57 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 October, 2010, 06:55:34 PM
This was in my car Peter.
I can't wait to see what happens, as at last I will be able to battle to the death with the powers that be  :D



Obviously it's their death I'm on about!

There is one very simple rule to follow and that is NEVER to respond to their letter which will be adressed to your legal title/Strawman which in your case will be MR followed by your full name.I cant recall right now if your name has to be printed in upper case or not so i will doublecheck.

In the meantime i will find a copy of a letter which is worded in a very specific way which is effective against requests from govt agencies for payment of fines and parking tickets and that type of thing.The letter i have is a template where you dont change the wording and just add your own details.

This is just something to have up your sleeve if they are difficult with you so if you want the details before you respond if it isnt dropped then send a PM.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 14 October, 2010, 12:30:57 AM
my evangelion unit 04 model kit has a scuff on it now this its self is not a problem on most model kits as you can paint over only problem is the blasted thing is chrome not shiney chrome but that dull sort. >:(

(http://image.shopping.yahoo.co.jp/i/j/galaxy_hg-eva04)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 October, 2010, 08:20:08 AM
Got home last night at 9.15, fixed the laptop and the ps3, which my wife that buggered during the day, spent three hours pottering around with the vague idea that there was something i should be doing, and went to bed.
Got up at six thirty for work this morning, only to realise that i hadnt read my prog or meg, which had been sitting on the table all night.
Arsebiscuits.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 October, 2010, 11:53:04 AM
I printed out my paypal receipt for BICS, my hotel reservation, train confirmation and even a map showing the hotel, the convention centre and the pub - and I put them all somewhere safe. Very, very safe apparently, 'cos I can't find the buggers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: uncle fester on 14 October, 2010, 12:11:45 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 14 October, 2010, 11:53:04 AM
I printed out my paypal receipt for BICS, my hotel reservation, train confirmation and even a map showing the hotel, the convention centre and the pub - and I put them all somewhere safe. Very, very safe apparently, 'cos I can't find the buggers.

This happens to me every day in some form or another :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 October, 2010, 12:33:17 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 October, 2010, 10:45:57 PM
There is one very simple rule to follow and that is NEVER to respond to their letter which will be adressed to your legal title/Strawman

Are you quite certain? As far as I know, if you don't respond you incur further penalties.

How do you challenge the prosecution in court without responding to the letter?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 October, 2010, 12:58:00 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 14 October, 2010, 12:33:17 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 13 October, 2010, 10:45:57 PM
There is one very simple rule to follow and that is NEVER to respond to their letter which will be adressed to your legal title/Strawman

Are you quite certain? As far as I know, if you don't respond you incur further penalties.

How do you challenge the prosecution in court without responding to the letter?

It is technically true that the person named on your Birth Certificate and the actual biological person to whom that Birth Certificate was issued are not the same entity. Your Birth Certificate is like a bond, something the Government can point to and use as collateral for the National Debt (ie, evidence of a tax payer). This throws up many intriguing possibilities, not least of which is the relatively new idea of "Accepted for Value." (To oversimplify, every bill you receive is actually an asset to the issuing company, worth its face value as part of the National Debt. For example, a water bill for £100 represents £100 worth of the National Debt and is also "worth" £100 to the water company because they expect you to pay it. In many respects, a bill is entirely similar to a cheque. If you set up your Birth Certificate correctly, lodging it with the Bank of England as a bond, you can technically acknowledge that the £100 bill is worth £100 and charge it to your bond. £100 is then removed from the National Debt and paid to the Water Company, settling your bill, paying the Water Company and reducing the National Debt all at the same time. It's quite a bit more involved than that, but this is the basic idea.)

Whilst it is true that any bill or summons or parking ticket isn't technically issued to you but to your birth certificate/bond, you need to be really knowledgeable about the technicalities before you argue such a thing in court. Much as courts may be maligned, you can trust them to follow their own procedures (both technical and behavioral) and they do not tolerate sloppy preparation. If you want to play them at their own game, you have to know the rules.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 14 October, 2010, 06:41:51 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 14 October, 2010, 11:53:04 AM
I printed out my paypal receipt for BICS, my hotel reservation, train confirmation and even a map showing the hotel, the convention centre and the pub - and I put them all somewhere safe. Very, very safe apparently, 'cos I can't find the buggers.

yea and that safe place is called the bin I bet you might have accidently throne them away with something elses like a news paper happens to my mum's documents all the time :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 15 October, 2010, 06:59:42 PM
The corner of my bedroom window is infested - INFESTED - with ladybirds, I've just noticed. Seriously, it's a frikkin' colony. They look like they're setting up camp for the winter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 October, 2010, 09:07:39 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 15 October, 2010, 06:59:42 PM
The corner of my bedroom window is infested - INFESTED - with ladybirds, I've just noticed. Seriously, it's a frikkin' colony. They look like they're setting up camp for the winter.

On the outside, I hope.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 15 October, 2010, 09:20:52 PM
Can we get a photo?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 15 October, 2010, 09:27:56 PM
On the INSIDE.

Every time one leaves the safety of the pack to crawl across my wall or computer screen I've been pouncing with a cup and card to relocate the buggers outside, but I've not plucked up the courage to tackle the main mass as yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 16 October, 2010, 09:15:00 AM
Some twit has just won my old HDTV on Ebay, collection only. Of course, reading the postage instructions never occured to them, so they are now expecting it to be posted to them.  >:( I suppose I'll have to re-list the bugger....what a waste of a ten day listing that was!  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Aaron A Aardvark on 19 October, 2010, 08:59:09 AM
My aquarium problems are over, coz ALL my fish are dead.

Fuck.

Anyone want a big glass box full of cloudy water?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 October, 2010, 01:23:04 PM
Just had a haircut (it was starting to look too much like a mullett) and I've got itchy bits down my collar.

And it's going to be at least seven hours before I get home and get a chance to change my shirt.

But so long as I don't think about it itching, I'll be fine.

So long as I don't think about it itching, I'll be fine.

So long as I don't think about it itching, I'll be fine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 October, 2010, 06:37:31 PM
itchy ,scratchy ....tasty
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 19 October, 2010, 06:54:13 PM
Didn't like his face...

I've misplaced my good wooly hat of 7 years vintage and have bought another one that I suspect will not keep it's shape for so long.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 October, 2010, 06:55:53 PM
I got dishwasher steam in my nose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 October, 2010, 05:02:40 PM
Three refuse to give me my PAC. Gah!

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 20 October, 2010, 07:59:11 PM
I think they have to by law now, don't they? That's if your contract is up of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 October, 2010, 08:22:36 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 October, 2010, 06:55:53 PM
I got dishwasher steam in my nose.

good for the sinuses my boy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 October, 2010, 08:42:33 PM
I thought it was Tuesday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 October, 2010, 08:45:22 PM
No, it's Wednesday. And we all know what Wednesday Night is, don't we?

Yap Shop!

Get yer asses in here!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 October, 2010, 09:28:14 PM
Frigging alarm has gone off AGAIN from the church across the road and quite honestly i am sick of it as they never seem to fix it.

Plan A : Play some loud music to block out the sound as it usually goes on for about 20 minutes.

Plan B : If it persists and persists and doesnt stop i will silence it myself.

Its always when its quiet and i am trying to concentrate on something.

Lucky i am not feeling irritable or Plan B would be Plan A
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 21 October, 2010, 09:53:47 PM
Documentary about Edgar Allan Poe on BBC4, but I can't concentrate on what the experts are saying, much less the reading aloud from his work, because of the intrusive background music. When someone is reading aloud from Morella or Ligeia, how can it possibly help to be playing The Cure, Schubert or Portishead over it? Daft.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 22 October, 2010, 09:18:06 PM
So we went to the shops last night. After a bit of dinner in KFC (the good old boneless bargain bucket, yum!) we were loading the kids into the car in the car park and tidying away the buggy. This lady in a 4x4 roars in and turns into the aisle opposite where we are parked. She pulls into the parking space ahead of and adjacent to our car. Hops out and legs it into the shops, in a major hurry like. Grand, whatever. Next thing,as I am putting the buggy in the back, I hear my daughter inside the car scream, and look up to see the 4x4 coming straight for us!!! Fecking car was left in gear and the handbrake wasnt engaged,and as we were on a slight slope....whammo, right into the side of my car!!! Of course, the carpark security attendant wasn't much use, a bit of a Nick Frost lookalike who just thought it was hilarious. The shopping centre intercom was broken so we couldnt page the driver of the car and had to just sit there and wait for her to come out. The flippin guards were all too busy chasing (on foot)some young lads who had just robbed a pub in the next town so we had to wait for them to come as well! Ended up sitting there for nearly an hour before both the other car owner and the guards showed up!!!  And I've got a dirty great dent in the side of my car.

But...

you have to look on the bright side.

Our kids were all in the car when it happened, not standing around outside when it happened. How easily one of them could have been standing right there at the door where the other vehicle rammed into. Scaaaaaaaaaaaaaaary.

And from the other driver's perspective, (who was very shocked and apologetic when she eventually did show up) it may cost her her no claims bonus on her insurance but she is DAMN lucky my car was there to stop hers...after mine, there was nothing else there but a slope right to the back concrete wall a good twenty yards off...a car that size building up a bit of speed as it rolled down that hill and it would have been some nice mess I can tell you!!

A minor impediment indeed. But at least we'll get to drive around in a nice swank replacement car for a few days while ours gets fixed!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 22 October, 2010, 09:48:11 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 21 October, 2010, 09:53:47 PM
When someone is reading aloud from Morella or Ligeia, how can it possibly help to be playing The Cure, Schubert or Portishead over it? Daft.
I think it's the same logic which dictates that a jobbing actor in a badly lit room and a tricorne hat scratching away with a quill helps you appreciate Shakespeare's creative process or the principles behind the Declaration of Arbroath.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 October, 2010, 10:56:52 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 22 October, 2010, 09:48:11 PM
I think it's the same logic which dictates that a jobbing actor in a badly lit room and a tricorne hat scratching away with a quill helps you appreciate Shakespeare's creative process

I think tricorne hats and Shakespeare in the same breath is a surefire recipe for pointing at the TV like you're acting out the ending of Invasion of the Bodysnatchers, but I take your point.
:lol:


For anyone who thinks that's a spoiler for Invasion of the Bodysnatchers (1978), yes, there is pointing involved.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 October, 2010, 11:01:03 PM
I went in the bath after my dad to save water. There were numerous bits of lint in the water. I trapped one of the bits of lint under my right index finger. There seemed to be something more to this piece. I was able to squish this piece. I discovered that it was being held together with fecal matter.


It was bumfluff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 22 October, 2010, 11:07:14 PM
aaaah here  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 October, 2010, 11:10:04 PM
Oh. God.  :o




and I keep saying, with the Tories back in and the cuts and everything, it's 1979 again. That people are sharing bathwater just confirms it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 22 October, 2010, 11:12:03 PM
haha! :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 22 October, 2010, 11:45:46 PM
(people did that BACK THEN!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 22 October, 2010, 11:52:10 PM
It's the first thing that crossed my mind too

well actually "eeeeuuuuuaaargghhhhh!!" was the first thing...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 October, 2010, 11:55:26 PM
Roger, what did your mom say, I presume that she was in the bath with you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 23 October, 2010, 12:11:57 AM
It was only a tiny piece. Hence why this is a "minor impediment".

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 23 October, 2010, 01:29:51 AM
please, make it stop

make it stop

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 23 October, 2010, 03:32:59 AM
A complaint in A flat minor impediment - the most disturbing of all keys.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 23 October, 2010, 10:30:39 AM
My friggin car wouldn't start this morning and it was serviced last week. I had a flight to catch so had to get a taxi and I'd pre booked the parking!

Balls!

I just about made the flight thankfully...

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 23 October, 2010, 03:05:12 PM
My eldest daughter used the toilet this morning and didn't flush or put the lid down. My youngest daughter then dropped her big sisters hello kitty pencil case into the toilet. It was too big to flush so muggins here had to fish it out.

Also, I had sushi for lunch and somehow got wasabi up my nose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 23 October, 2010, 05:32:54 PM
Wasabai...shudder!
You'd think I'd be used to it by now, seeing as my wife is Japanese and I spend at least 1 month every year in Tokyo, but.....no.....not at all!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 23 October, 2010, 09:48:10 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 23 October, 2010, 03:05:12 PM
pencil case too big to flush

I presume you're joking! You can't flush pencil cases. They aren't biodegradable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 October, 2010, 10:50:25 AM
I was joking about the flushing but I won't pretend that I didn't consider it for half a second  ;).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 October, 2010, 05:44:39 PM
that was horibile I got foisibile loged out of face book for ages and told I had a virises called koobface I had to contack a sport center to get it fixed that was fun im still not shure how the hell he fixed it virgen digitile help is anoying like that but at least they got the job done
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 24 October, 2010, 05:55:23 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 24 October, 2010, 05:44:39 PM
I had to contack a sport center to get it fixed that was fun im still not shure how the hell he fixed it
Probably just ran it off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 October, 2010, 06:48:26 PM
I came this close to infecting some guy's computer. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CraveNoir on 24 October, 2010, 08:59:43 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 23 October, 2010, 03:05:12 PM
Also, I had sushi for lunch and somehow got wasabi up my nose.

That's great! The other day I had to put yoghurt up my nose as I'd been slicing chillis before picking it, and washing my hands twice in the interim apparently wasn't enough. Live and learn!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 24 October, 2010, 09:21:29 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 24 October, 2010, 05:44:39 PM
that was horibile I got foisibile loged out of face book for ages and told I had a virises called koobface I had to contack a sport center to get it fixed that was fun im still not shure how the hell he fixed it virgen digitile help is anoying like that but at least they got the job done

A sports centre?  :-*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 24 October, 2010, 09:38:40 PM
Thats support centre, natch.

I find it a trifle disturbing how little trouble I have deciphering Cyberleaders stuff these days. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 October, 2010, 06:25:58 PM
Stressed - Stressed - Stressed - Stressed........ >:(

Just had a really hard unpleasent day at work because i had to complete what i was working on today and to top that i encountered absolute stupidity while cycling home on the cyclepath on the seafront but thats the last fucking time i use that fucking cyclepath when its busy as its easier and safer to use the road and cycle in traffic.

Clueless Numbskulls with no cyclesense and no coordination not to mention the collision i nearly had [avoided because i have quick reactions and pay attention to what is going on all around] with a small child whos father was not paying any attention to the fact that the child was running around in the cyclepath plus 2 very near collisions with other cyclists one of which was dressed up in his cycling gear cycling like he was in the fucking TourDefrance going how fast ????

I shouted at one of the cyclists who had the audacity to blame me for one of the near misses when it wasnt my fault so i fucking told him to pay attention in future.



Never again as i dont need that crap in my life and i will say again that 90 percent of cyclists i encounter in  Brighton are clueless uncoordinated Moron Chimps.Stupid Shitheads.Everyone of them was at the back of the queue when brains were given out.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 26 October, 2010, 05:16:48 PM
My mate was meant to be giving me a set of labels before he went on holiday so I could send our football fanzine out to the subscribers. He forgot, which means I've spent the last hour trying to figure out how to convert an Excel spreadsheet into a mailmerge thingy. Still haven't managed it as I'm a bit behind the times when it comes to computers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 26 October, 2010, 07:25:09 PM
Four weeks ago, I was told that my contract in work was going to be extended for another two months. Unfortunately, I didn't get anything in writing.

My colleague, on the same contract, has just tried to book November the 5th off for his birthday and been told "You won't be working for us then". It turns out that HR (or People Services or whatever they've elected to call themselves this week) haven't dealt with the paperwork for extending temps contracts. This affects at least four departments.

If it's not sorted by Friday afternoon, I'll be looking for another job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 October, 2010, 07:26:44 PM
Hope it goes in your favour worldshown!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 26 October, 2010, 07:30:24 PM
From experience, I'd start looking now, Worldshown.
Bad news, man. Hope you get it sorted quickly, one way or another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 October, 2010, 12:24:53 AM
I sliced my left index finger open when I misjudged the extent of crustyness that a mini-baguette from the Co-op's "Cuisine de France" range of baked breads and baked cakes would have and thus the knife went through the bread and into my finger. I was, in all likelihood, also holding it at a somewhat awkward angle.

Blood went everywhere when I tried other palliatives that were not saliva so I had to clean up blood even as I was bleeding. I still got my mini-baguette as I put it on a plate (although it might have been a wooden chopping board) for me to slice and I was able to apply margarine to a reasonable standard considering I essentially only had one and a half hands. I did not get blood on my bread.

After extensive mouth-dwelling, the cut stopped bleeding but presently I am feeling somewhat light-headed although this may (as is always a possibility in our postmodern milieu) be Pavlovian.







Mike Gloady.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 27 October, 2010, 04:21:32 AM
I can't seem to finish anyth
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 27 October, 2010, 07:26:15 AM
I was supposed to be interviewing a Big Name writer, who was well p for it, but their publisher said we couldn't do it...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 27 October, 2010, 09:27:27 AM
Quote from: worldshown on 26 October, 2010, 07:25:09 PM
Four weeks ago, I was told that my contract in work was going to be extended for another two months. Unfortunately, I didn't get anything in writing.

My colleague, on the same contract, has just tried to book November the 5th off for his birthday and been told "You won't be working for us then". It turns out that HR (or People Services or whatever they've elected to call themselves this week) haven't dealt with the paperwork for extending temps contracts. This affects at least four departments.

If it's not sorted by Friday afternoon, I'll be looking for another job.

Something similar happened to me in my last job, we'd verbally been told we'd be good for another year or so, but no extensions appeared and we were out on the street! They did call me a couple of months later offering a contract, but by that point I was feeling a bit sore about it and had made other plans so turned it down. Employers seem to forget that when it comes to contracts they're messing your whole life around, even if it doesn't seem that big a deal to them. Hope it works out for you or that you at least find more work soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 October, 2010, 03:06:23 PM
The clocks are going backwards by 1 hour.

I wish this wouldnt happen but it males me laugh when everyone says "Oh but you get an extra hour of daylight!".

You dont get an extra hour of daylight at all.

What a ridulous lot of nonsense.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 30 October, 2010, 03:31:45 PM
Doesn't that depend on what time you get up?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 October, 2010, 04:18:19 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 30 October, 2010, 03:31:45 PM
Doesn't that depend on what time you get up?

I think its moving the daylight backwards by one hour but its not an extra hour.

Or something like that but its a pain because as i work outside it means i have to get up one hour earlier but i wish it was stay as BST all year round.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 October, 2010, 07:04:48 PM
I thought I would open a nice bottle of red for the missus and so grabbed one from the rack. The bloody cork broke in two so I had to fart about pushing the bugger in and decanting through a coffee filter, what a fiasco ::)

BUT it doesn't end there folks!
I somehow managed to throw a load all over a white curtain (now in the wash), my jeans, my boots and the floor (luckily it's tiled). I still can't figure out how on earth I did it. So much for a relaxing evening  :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 03 November, 2010, 09:20:08 PM
While making sweet love to the missus this weekend (bear with me on this) I brought her to a huge climax big enough that she literally thought she was having a heart attack. She was panicking and I put it down to hyperventilation. I got her a cool glass of water and calmed her down, inwardly I got quite concerned but didn't show it. My ego grew tenfold I can tell you.
The pain in her chest carried on through yesterday so she went to the doctors this morning.
It appears she is suffering from Costochondritis and hasn't a clue how it could have happened, It may have occurred weeks ago and has gradually got worse.
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/costochondritis/DS00626




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 03 November, 2010, 09:29:00 PM
Er,well I hope your good lady recovers from her nasty sounding prang. I'm unable to match vzzbux's House of fun but, co workers?!

When they don't appear for work AGAIN , leaving you to cover for them isn't it a damn pisser? 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 03 November, 2010, 10:13:29 PM
I fear I'm losing my spacial awareness. I've been dropping, fumbling, and walking into things for a few days now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 04 November, 2010, 08:15:35 AM
I've been a clumsy spaz from a very early age, and it does seem to get worse as time goes by.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 04 November, 2010, 08:41:17 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 October, 2010, 07:04:48 PM
I somehow managed to throw a load all over a white curtain (now in the wash)

Hope that comes out, it can be such a stubborn stain!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 04 November, 2010, 09:46:00 AM
Out damned spot.

(and I ain't talking about the dog)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 November, 2010, 11:41:51 AM
It was very windy last night. Got up this morning to find the lid had been blown off the rabbit hutch. One rabbit was still sitting in its habitual place getting rained on, the other had leapt out and gone off to sit under a bush. Before I'd even had breakfast I had to mess about with fitting new hinges and a secure catch in the pouring rain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 04 November, 2010, 11:51:27 AM
That sucks but thank God the rabbits were still present and in one piece!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 November, 2010, 12:00:01 PM
They were quite funny, actually. When we started messing about with the wreckage they came and had a nose around. They're always curious about anything different in their environment. One of them hopped into the hutch for a better look while I was unscrewing the old hinges.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 04 November, 2010, 12:11:56 PM
I feel ever such a fool! Tried to put the heating on for the first time a couple of weeks ago, but couldn't get it to come on. So it was extra jumpers for a while until I could take a day off work and book an engineer, who I was waiting in for today ... when I took one last look at it.

It turns out that the thermostat wheel on this relatively new boiler goes from high to low, whereas the one we had for 18 years went from low to high. This means that it was working fine, but I was turning it to minimum rather than maximum, hence no heat.

Luckily I spotted it and rang to cancel just in time (I actually saw his van arrive, turn round and leave) so I didn't have the shame of having it pointed out to me by a patronising workman.

Still, day off work, so I might pop into town and buy me a comic or two!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 04 November, 2010, 12:14:30 PM
A similar thing happened where i work. Sadly, we didnt notice in time and i had to suffer the boiler engineer's smirks.

One of my service users had switched the boiler off at the plug, while hoovering.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 November, 2010, 12:54:17 PM
I can't wrap anything up without getting loose pubes trapped under the Sellotape.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 04 November, 2010, 12:57:39 PM
The £12 tickets had already been snapped up when I went to arrange my xmas visit to my ancestral homelands... grrrrr
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 November, 2010, 01:13:58 PM
I have a liqueur-flavoured hangover.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 04 November, 2010, 01:19:31 PM
Quote from: Banners on 04 November, 2010, 12:54:17 PM
I can't wrap anything up without getting loose pubes trapped under the Sellotape.

M@

I've read this half a dozen  times now


and I still don't know what to think


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 November, 2010, 01:20:13 PM
I was 40 minutes late for a private tutoring appointment last night because of a multi-vehicle accident on the A470 in the rain. Both lanes were closed and traffic was diverted onto the hard shoulder. At the same time, traffic was merging from the M4 sliproad was taking advantage of 3 mph driving to split into three lanes of traffic, even driving down the middle of the chevron in their haste to barge their way in.

I was totally prepared to give up to a 100% discount on the tutorial and cut it down to 20 minutes, but the mum was happy for me to teach the full hour. At least mine wasn't one of the seven or eight cars that had gone into the back of one another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 November, 2010, 01:22:52 PM
Quote from: johnnystress on 04 November, 2010, 01:19:31 PM
Quote from: Banners on 04 November, 2010, 12:54:17 PM
I can't wrap anything up without getting loose pubes trapped under the Sellotape.

M@
I've read this half a dozen times now and I still don't know what to think

I think he'll just have to put some clothes on when he's wrapping parcels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cthulouis on 04 November, 2010, 01:38:45 PM
I've been waiting in the living room all day for the scanner I have ordered to turn up.

I have an increasing feeling it won't be turning up today. From tomorrow onwards I'll be at work for the next several days, so won't be around to accept it from the postie.

I also need to pick up another package from the post office; but if I leave the house, the scanner is bound to arrive.

Tis a difficult thing, this 1-2 day postage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cthulouis on 04 November, 2010, 02:17:15 PM
It's here!

I knew sod's law would prevail, and that it would turn up after the previous post!

Blimey, it's a big'un.

*giggles the crazed giggle of one who has a new scanner!*

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 November, 2010, 06:29:15 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 04 November, 2010, 12:57:39 PM
The £12 tickets had already been snapped up when I went to arrange my xmas visit to my ancestral homelands... grrrrr

I always get caught out like that because i am not super organised and together like all these early birds that know what they are doing weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks ahead so i always pay the full fare.

People who snap up tickets in advance are annoying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 November, 2010, 08:35:47 PM
Quote from: Cthulouis on 04 November, 2010, 02:17:15 PM
It's here!

I knew sod's law would prevail, and that it would turn up after the previous post!
Did you happen to notice any pubes under the packing tape?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 04 November, 2010, 08:54:21 PM
The b on my keyboard seems not to want to work on the average touch. I have to keep backtracking and adding in all the b's after the fact with sharp jabs.

And yes, I had to do it for two of them in this post.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 November, 2010, 09:16:07 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 04 November, 2010, 08:54:21 PM
The b on my keyboard seems not to want to work on the average touch. I have to keep backtracking and adding in all the b's after the fact with sharp jabs.

And yes, I had to do it for two of them in this post.

I have the exact same problem with the shift key or whatever its called on a Mac keyboard when you type in capitals.When i am typing a lot [it just did it again with that W] it happens over and over again resulting in lots of backtracking and corrections and i have actually got past the point of finding it annoying but it still irritates.

The problem is the key is oversized in comparison to the rubber pressure thing under the key as its immediately central with nothing to the left and right so if you dont press the key in the centre every time it misses and it happens a lot of i am typing thousands of words.

I dont get why this problem wasnt obvious to Apple.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cthulouis on 05 November, 2010, 12:02:38 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 04 November, 2010, 08:35:47 PM
Did you happen to notice any pubes under the packing tape?

Thankfully not.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 05 November, 2010, 07:18:17 PM
My 5.1 system has kicked the bucket I think. Noticed today nothing's coming out the center channel (so no dialogue effectively), checked a number of different sources, cables and speakers and it does seem to narrow down to the decoder itself that's causing the problem. I put it down to 'minor' impediment purely because it was a really old system and I could do with something meatier, but I could certainly do without bloody paying for one right now so it'll likely have to wait.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 06 November, 2010, 03:08:36 PM
Th cistern lever on the toilet just snapped clean in two when I tried to flush.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 November, 2010, 03:28:44 PM
I saw an advert the other day for AVATAR in 3D, this is after Cameron said it would not be coming out on a 3D format. Obviously he didn't make enough money from the DVD/Bluray sales.
This is another reason why I hardly buy any discs any more. I suppose he'll find time for a Directors cut in a years time. Is it any wonder many people watch stuff on the net ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 06 November, 2010, 06:32:58 PM
Because they've just brought a body in a bodybag out of the house next door to where i work.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 November, 2010, 08:23:49 PM
Back from holiday. My sister left the house in a *delightful* state.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 November, 2010, 08:24:36 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 06 November, 2010, 06:32:58 PM
Because they've just brought a body in a bodybag out of the house next door to where i work.

SBT

I wish a body/s in a bodybag/s would be brought out of the house next door to where i live.

Actually they are not that bad but they keep leaving the outside light by their door and it has been left on for days on end.At night it lights up the outside yard like its a lightbox which is a pain as prefer it dark but some people are scared of the dark.

WWhhhooooooo.....

boo hoo

I might have to have a very polite word with them about it as its annoying as i dont like artificial light at night unless its very low level.I have a right to darkness and i am tired of it now.It should have a motion sensor instead.There is a light outside mine with a motion sensor but i turned the whole thing off as i dont need it on.I know the owner of the property who lives elsewhere so i could have a word with them but i get on alright with next door and i would rather not go behind their backs.

They just need to turn it off when its not used like they used to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 November, 2010, 11:52:42 PM
As soon as i post the comment the light goes off.

:D ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 07 November, 2010, 02:12:32 PM
I locked my keys inside my moped's storage trunk yesterday. Cue a bus-trip home in the rain to get my spare set and another one back. During which I lost both my gloves, found one, found the other, then realised I'd lost the first one again.

On the positive side, Jessica Alba happened to be driving past and took pity on me, flying me back to Hollywood in her private jet for a weekend of non-stop sex and champagne.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 07 November, 2010, 06:11:50 PM
Next door that i was talking about are moving out on Monday.

Synchronicity man......

Shame as they were alright generally and they were also quiet.

There was a Bluebottle fly buzzing around which was annoying  >:(.It was buzzing around in the bathroom so i took a swing at it with a rolled up magazine as it was buzzing around and hit it as there was a squashed fly on the floor.It was making it very difficult to relax.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 07 November, 2010, 06:23:22 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 07 November, 2010, 06:11:50 PM
Next door that i was talking about are moving out on Monday.

And to think, it was only a day ago you were wishing them dead! Looks like they had a lucky escape there, what with it being the wish fairy's weekend off and all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 November, 2010, 06:32:41 PM
No washing machine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 07 November, 2010, 06:46:58 PM
My latest digibox (number nine, i believe) has just found a new way to piss me off. As well as not having a properly functioning EPG (no, it's not my area having a 'weak signal', mr shopkeeper, the previous eight have been fine in that respect) and a STUPID function whereby you cant just scroll through the channels til you get to radio, like every other box, instead having to press the 'radio' button, then press it again to go back to tv... As well as this, the '3' and 'radio' buttons have decided to fall off the remote, meaning i cant listen to radio at all. Nine boxes in six years. Previous eight just died, this one is just shit. I've had cheap ones, expensive ones, and everything in between. All crap. Freeview can suck my arse.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 November, 2010, 07:02:34 PM
This is called "Planned obsolescence."

Manufacturers build things to fail so that you'll buy another in a few years. Clever, aren't they?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 07 November, 2010, 08:05:59 PM
We did Amazon wish lists for our two kids to make it easier for our families to know what to get them for Crimbo.

My mother in law decided to buy one item but went to the shops to get it instead and didn't tell us for a week so someone else bought it in the meantime from Amazon.

My Mother bought several items but for some unknown reason decided to leave them in her basket for over a week before paying for them and in the meantime someone else bought two of the items.

FFS.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 November, 2010, 08:10:07 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 07 November, 2010, 06:32:41 PM
No washing machine.

What! Has your mum gone on holiday  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 07 November, 2010, 11:18:06 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 07 November, 2010, 06:23:22 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 07 November, 2010, 06:11:50 PM
Next door that i was talking about are moving out on Monday.

And to think, it was only a day ago you were wishing them dead! Looks like they had a lucky escape there, what with it being the wish fairy's weekend off and all.

They are a Gay couple and it seems like they have fallen out with each other and one has been kicked out of the house.They are having a huge row right now and i overheard some of what they were saying.Its really kicking off now but i am blocking it out by listening to music through headphones.

Its so dramatic !!    :lol:

"I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU !!! - I WANT YOU PACKED AND OUT OF THIS HOUSE WHEN I GET BACK FROM WORK!!!!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 November, 2010, 11:39:39 PM
I'm not allowed to make clapping sounds with my feet no more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 08 November, 2010, 12:22:41 AM
QuoteNo washing machine.

I once had a washing machine that started spilling dirty water all over my flat, and I haven't a clue about plumbing. After weeks of using the launderette I was lying in bed half asleep thinking about something else entirely when I suddenly realised what was wrong with the washing machine, which I then fixed in a matter of minutes.
I am the Archimedes of unimportant things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 November, 2010, 12:25:38 AM

I remember it was that Wednesday
Oh when it rained and it rained
They traipsed mud all over the house
It took hours and hours to scrub it out
All over the hall carpet
I took my mop and bucket
And I cleaned and I cleaned
The kitchen floor
Until it sparkled
Then I took my laundry basket
And put the linen all in it
And everything I could fit in it
And all our dirty clothes that hadn't gone into the wash
And all your shirts and jeans and things
And put them in the new washing machine
Washing machine
Washing machine

I watched them go 'round and 'round
My blouse wrapping itself around your trousers
Oh the waves are going out
My skirt floating up around my waist
As I wade out into the surf
Oh and the waves are coming in
Oh and the waves are going out
Oh and you're standing right behind me
Little fish swim between my legs
Oh and the waves are coming in
Oh and the waves are going out
Oh and the waves are coming in
Out of the corner of my eye
I think I see you standing outside
But it's just your shirt
Hanging on the washing line
Waving its arm as the wind blows by
And it looks so alive
Nice and white
Just like its climbed right out
Of my washing machine
Washing machine
Washing machine

Slooshy sloshy slooshy sloshy
Get that dirty shirty clean
Slooshy sloshy slooshy sloshy
Make those cuffs and collars gleam
Everything clean and shiny

Washing machine
Washing machine
Washing machine
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 08 November, 2010, 12:51:19 AM
yes. in fact, i'd go so far as to add:

Diplomatic Washing machine
Climb down from cloud cuckoo land
Dish this dirt for senile convert
Clean living as in the adverts

And in this brave new world
Proud is the Philistine
And in this brave new world
Who needs the sun to shine

EDIT: Fuck. i'm quoting john lydon, but watch coincidence rear its godlike head at 2.16
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZnA4jHuyzs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZnA4jHuyzs)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 08 November, 2010, 01:24:51 AM
One of the few fellow artists Lydon didn't view as a big bag of wank if I remember correctly.

seems to set me off on some PIL listening spree now. :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 08 November, 2010, 01:40:01 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 07 November, 2010, 11:18:06 PM
"I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU !!! - I WANT YOU PACKED AND OUT OF THIS HOUSE WHEN I GET BACK FROM WORK!!!!"

But please don't break anything.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 08 November, 2010, 01:50:03 AM
It isn't everyday you get to witness a real life soap drama unfold before your eyes. Maybe they will end up on Jeremy Kyle.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 08 November, 2010, 02:35:20 AM
She is the diamond's daughter
Scorpion Honey made of sugar cane
The sister of risk
A travelling rose, a subterranean.
Humming birds hover in the high summer heat
The taste is bitter, the taste is sweet
She will push you over the end
And then she will guide you safely home again.

She is the Empress card
The genius waitress, the be all & end all
She can do the Darktown Strut, stepping it up
She can do the Georgia Crawl.
The needle drops - the record spins
Gypsy hips swing to the mandolin
She will push you over the end
Then she will guide you safely home again.

...just thought I'd say.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 November, 2010, 07:11:39 PM
I am late paying council tax because i mislaid the bill as it got mixed up with other paperwork and then forgot about it completely.Then i was curious why i hadnt been sent a bill and so i thought bollocks to them if they cant send a bill as i cant pay it unless i am billed.Why should i ask them to do their job when they should be doing it anyway ?

So now i have got a court summons which isnt a big deal but as i forgot that i had been billed then why wasnt i sent a reminder ??

The bill was sent in late August and its now roughly 3 months later so i should have been sent a reminder 1.5 months ago where i would have been given the opportunity to avoid a court summons.Now i am not allowed to pay in instalments as i have to pay the full amount including paying for services i have yet to receive which is normally out of the question but legislation by govt stipulates i have to pay in full to avoid a CCJ.

I am going to say something about this but they can have a full payment if they want as it doesnt matter to me but just to spite them and make my point i am not paying the 25 quid court summons charge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 09 November, 2010, 04:45:28 PM
Orient's potential 2nd round FA Cup tie at Droyslden has been switched to a Monday night so it can be shown on ESPN if we get through the replay. No nice away trip to a non-league outfit for me now. Bastards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 November, 2010, 04:48:56 PM
I slept funny and as a result have a bad back.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 09 November, 2010, 08:15:46 PM
Hassle this evening.

Where i was working today i was chasing cables into a wall before plastering and i must have clipped the insulation on the wire exposing cable which was plastered over today or its plaster on a connecting block on another socket.I know where the fault is and the electrician has been called out this evening to fix it because the clients power was tripping out as they have had a new circuit board and breaker which is highly sensitive.

The point here is why was the circuit live in that room anyway and why were the ends of the cables that were live not covered in insulation tape ?

Why didnt i think to disconnect that circuit because it was live or insulate the cables ?

I got a shock from it earlier but i have been shocked by 240v power lots of times before and it has never done any harm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 09 November, 2010, 08:57:18 PM
I have had a right day today.
Firstly I got a phone call from my ex saying my daughter wants to stay with me. I think something big has kicked off but not given any details. Not surprised really, she has two brothers her seven month pregnant mum and other dad(my cousin) and her uncle all living under one roof. I was expected to have her at the drop of a hat as in today. Our house has limited room. Sophies room is just big enough for her and Robbies room is a third the size bigger and to move a fourteen year old in our home would be very hard, and not expected to consult my wife is just stupid. Have recently had a text saying panic over she is staying, thank fuck, for now anyway.
Secondly, having got back from the doctors my wife tells my Robbie has got(http://i236.photobucket.com/albums/ff200/vzzbuxblx/impetigoza.jpg) on his elbow.

All good fun.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 09 November, 2010, 11:56:07 PM
I just burnt my mouth on a boiled egg. The inside was a lot hotter than the outside.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 November, 2010, 12:20:27 AM
There was a blue stain on the bar of Dove I used to wash my hands and I noticed that it was a similar colour to the type of mouthwash we use in our household.

As a consequence, my hands have evidently seen fit to think that they are, in fact, teeth. In order to mimic the characteristics of teeth they have covered themselves in excezma so as to become hard, like enamel is.

The only way I now have to clean my hands is by dipping them in huge bowls of Aquafresh that cost me a fortune to fill up. I never used Aquafresh before the incident, but for some reason it is the only brand that works.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 November, 2010, 10:53:54 AM
Godpleton, you don't half come out with some mad stuff these days.

Quote from: vzzbux on 09 November, 2010, 08:57:18 PM
(http://i236.photobucket.com/albums/ff200/vzzbuxblx/impetigoza.jpg)

Impetigo Jones of the elbow? Sounds yucky. More typical to get that round the gob, I would have thought. Never mind; it should clear up in a week or so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 November, 2010, 02:40:59 PM
The cruise ship Carnival Splendor without power for 4 days and running out of provisions.

Plenty of scope for wry amusement there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 11 November, 2010, 02:59:19 PM
Sciatica. Never suffered with it before and holy shit it's fucking painful. I would cheerfully hack my left leg off with a spade at the moment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 November, 2010, 06:52:12 PM
My wife said she was cold in bed last night 'Southerner ::)', it was only minus 1 at work for me (still T-shirt weather).
So tonight I decided to fill a hot waterbottle for her (it's inside a fluffy monkey, women.....), I am too nice really. Anyway, after I had filled it up I placed it between my thighs, as I filled the water filter back up. All of a sudden extreme heat registered on my left inner thigh, the fucker had only gone and leaked. Still, better to have a red thigh than a wet bed, unless you like that sort of thing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 11 November, 2010, 07:59:15 PM
You had a fluffy monkey woman leak over your inner thigh? I take my hat off to you cf, that's one ive never done.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 11 November, 2010, 09:00:43 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 11 November, 2010, 07:59:15 PM
You had a fluffy monkey woman leak over your inner thigh? I take my hat off to you cf, that's one ive never done.
SBT

contents of nose now on chin ...thankks sbt! :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 November, 2010, 09:36:07 PM
I was going to write something about wanting some of them fluffy monkey women, but I gave up on the attempt because I couldn't go the extra-baroque mile that SmallBlueThing managed.
;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 11 November, 2010, 09:45:30 PM
Next time make sure the Fluffy Monkey Woman doesnt have a hot water bottle inside her.

Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 November, 2010, 06:52:12 PM
My wife said she was cold in bed last night 'Southerner ::)', it was only minus 1 at work for me (still T-shirt weather).
So tonight I decided to fill a hot waterbottle for her (it's inside a fluffy monkey, women.....), I am too nice really. Anyway, after I had filled it up I placed it between my thighs, as I filled the water filter back up. All of a sudden extreme heat registered on my left inner thigh, the fucker had only gone and leaked. Still, better to have a red thigh than a wet bed, unless you like that sort of thing!

It was an explosion of red hot Fluffy Monkey Woman love juice.

:o

The confessions of CF.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 11 November, 2010, 09:50:01 PM
get yourself a mutant titty crab and you got youself a ppaaaarrtttaaayyyyy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 11 November, 2010, 10:13:17 PM
Im willing to bet that cf's fluffy monkey woman wears a hat.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 November, 2010, 11:31:56 PM
Only at weddings and the races  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Misanthrope on 11 November, 2010, 11:46:06 PM
Pot Noodles no longer taste as good as they used to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 12 November, 2010, 02:44:06 PM
Can't believe it's still only quarter to three.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 November, 2010, 02:51:08 PM
I can't believe it's as late as quarter to three!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 November, 2010, 09:08:25 PM
Quote from: Ratty on 11 November, 2010, 11:46:06 PM
Pot Noodles no longer taste as good as they used to.
Pot noodles have never tasted good. The only time you cant get them to taste good is if you are stagging on at three in the morning in mid winter.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 November, 2010, 07:49:26 PM
I went into Halfords earlier to buy a new headlight bulb and the woman at the till only asked, "Would you like that fitted?"

She's lucky to still be breathing, cheeky cow!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 15 November, 2010, 10:45:38 PM
Because, flicking through the EPG- you know that official, production teams-sanctioned, written by professionals, guide to what im watching- i see that The Royle Family is described as "brilliant comedy", and the episode description ends in an exclamation mark, to punctuate just how h-h-h-hilarious it is.

Now, whatever you might think ot the series (it's alright, i s'pose) i think you'll agree that this is wronger than a hairy man in bumless trousers at a funeral. "Brilliant comedy"? I look forward to the next showing of New Jack City describing it as a "shit film" in that case. Or Gosford Park being "boring, snob-infested drama". Who writes this fountain of arse water?
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 November, 2010, 10:00:10 PM
I have been trying to trace a house i lived in Haslemere in Surrey for a short period sometime in the early to mid 70s which i think was 6 months.I want to retrace my childhood and the house has always stuck in my mind as its some of my earliest memories one of which is seeing red squirrels in the trees at the end of the garden.No one else in my family can remember the address but i can still recall what the house looked like.

Its doing my head in a bit and i have looked on Streetmap at houses which i think it was having searched on google earth but on Streetview i cant see the houses because they are hidden by trees and hedges and down driveways.The only evidence was an old postcard with a colour picture of a view overlooking the woods and fields somewhere close to the house.I was shown this postcard years ago but i have no idea where the postcard is now and neither does anyone else.

The only solution is to visit and search the area but i dont reckon i will find it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 18 November, 2010, 11:41:40 AM
Telephone directories from the 1970s?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 18 November, 2010, 08:13:19 PM
Will someone or something make it stop raining day after day after day after day because i am getting fucking tired of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 19 November, 2010, 06:46:03 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 November, 2010, 10:00:10 PM
I have been trying to trace a house i lived in Haslemere in Surrey for a short period sometime in the early to mid 70s which i think was 6 months.I want to retrace my childhood and the house has always stuck in my mind as its some of my earliest memories one of which is seeing red squirrels in the trees at the end of the garden.No one else in my family can remember the address but i can still recall what the house looked like.

Red squirrels in Surrey? That reminds me of a friend who told me that she remembers red squirrels in Greenwich Park. I thought she must be mistaken as I didn't realise they were that far South so recently. What with Grey squirrels introduced in Victorian times, I mean. It's as if the reds died out all of a sudden.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 19 November, 2010, 07:45:24 AM
We had reds in alexendra park in Hastings when i was a nipper. Dont think there are any now, having been replaced by greys and a few blacks.

This early morning message brought to you by communist paranoia, abduction delusion and the BNP.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 19 November, 2010, 08:38:51 AM
I spent my breakfast time this morning consoling my four year old daughter who has just realised that mortality is something we all suffer from  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 November, 2010, 09:14:42 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 19 November, 2010, 08:38:51 AM
I spent my breakfast time this morning consoling my four year old daughter who has just realised that mortality is something we all suffer from  :(.
Speak for yourself, puny human.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: LARF on 19 November, 2010, 09:27:22 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 19 November, 2010, 08:38:51 AM
I spent my breakfast time this morning consoling my four year old daughter who has just realised that mortality is something we all suffer from  :(.

At the age of only 32 Rog69's daughter, now an acclaimed scientist, finally solves the riddle of our mortality and enables humanity to live forever! "I owe it all to my father", she said "He explained, using toast and a bowl of wheetos, when I was four why we all only live a short life. That's why today I'm dedicating my research to him, and this is why my formula is called the Breakfast equation!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 November, 2010, 10:22:30 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 19 November, 2010, 06:46:03 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 November, 2010, 10:00:10 PM
I have been trying to trace a house i lived in Haslemere in Surrey for a short period sometime in the early to mid 70s which i think was 6 months.I want to retrace my childhood and the house has always stuck in my mind as its some of my earliest memories one of which is seeing red squirrels in the trees at the end of the garden.No one else in my family can remember the address but i can still recall what the house looked like.

Red squirrels in Surrey? That reminds me of a friend who told me that she remembers red squirrels in Greenwich Park. I thought she must be mistaken as I didn't realise they were that far South so recently. What with Grey squirrels introduced in Victorian times, I mean. It's as if the reds died out all of a sudden.

That was 1975 at the latest when i saw them.
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 19 November, 2010, 07:45:24 AM
We had reds in alexendra park in Hastings when i was a nipper. Dont think there are any now, having been replaced by greys and a few blacks.

This early morning message brought to you by communist paranoia, abduction delusion and the BNP.

SBT

I never saw any red squirrels in St.Helens Woods that i lived next door to from about 1979 as it was grey squirrels but i did see the odd white squirrel which is a mutation.I think the black squirrels are the same rather than an official species.

Its joining the Common Market wot got rid of red squirrels !  :lol:

The only location where they are now found is Brownsea Island.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 19 November, 2010, 12:59:20 PM
Because I can get to London from my home town in an hour 45mins, yet Leeds, which seems to be about the same distance on the map, takes 3 hours to get to.

And that's with a hangover.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 22 November, 2010, 10:41:15 AM
Dropping out of University with zero prospects and undeniably worthless A levels.

FML.


Buuuuuuut if anybody would like to hire me as a writer (comics, screenplays, the backs of condom wrappers), my schedule suddenly became a lot more open.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 22 November, 2010, 11:59:52 AM
I also dropped out of Uni and have shite A Levels. That was nine years ago but I'm now doing a job that I like and which pays well. It's not the end of the world Cristov.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 23 November, 2010, 10:39:36 PM
... i was going to take mini mog to preston to find a pressy for her mum's birthday but ...the english defense league are having a demonstration at the same time as the united against fascism lot on and i'm informed millwall are coming as well to play preston....

   i expect preston will be on the news at the weekend with all the aggro...


    so its either to chorley or wait til theyve rebuilt preston.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 November, 2010, 10:48:12 PM
Let's hope no students turn up as well, or there will be a bloodbath!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 30 November, 2010, 12:08:31 AM
Earlier I fell up the stairs and strained my perineum. :o

Seems to be no lasting damage, not something I'd like to explain to the doctor, I'm not sure I'd be too enthusiastic about going in the stirrups!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 November, 2010, 12:17:23 AM
Quote from: Emperor on 30 November, 2010, 12:08:31 AM
Earlier I fell up the stairs and strained my perineum. :o

, I'm not sure I'd be too enthusiastic about going in the stirrups!!

I dont know how you do that as i tried it and i couldnt get further than 1 step upwards.

Also i would have a rest for a few days before going back on the horse again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 30 November, 2010, 01:34:32 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 19 November, 2010, 10:22:30 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 19 November, 2010, 06:46:03 AM
Red squirrels in Surrey? That reminds me of a friend who told me that she remembers red squirrels in Greenwich Park. I thought she must be mistaken as I didn't realise they were that far South so recently. What with Grey squirrels introduced in Victorian times, I mean. It's as if the reds died out all of a sudden.

That was 1975 at the latest when i saw them.

Year of my birth! My friend is a few years younger so maybe they died out much more recently than I thought.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 November, 2010, 07:41:06 AM
Quote from: Emperor on 30 November, 2010, 12:08:31 AM
Earlier I fell up the stairs and strained my perineum. :o

The wife (no stranger to the stressed perineum) suggests massaging it with pine-nut oil.  She wouldn't do that for me, mind.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 30 November, 2010, 07:58:13 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 19 November, 2010, 10:22:30 AM
Its joining the Common Market wot got rid of red squirrels !  :lol:

The only location where they are now found is Brownsea Island.
And all over Galloway and the Borders: http://www.red-squirrels.org.uk/see-red-squirrels.asp
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 30 November, 2010, 08:46:09 PM
My wife's costochondritis has now intensified, aggravated by a chest infection. The doctor prescribed her Diclofenic sodium on top of her Ranitidine and she reacted badly. Our coutis didn't help the matter and now she is on eighteen tablets a day for the next few months after a visit to A&E, and I don't think we will be having any rumpy pumpy for a while.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 December, 2010, 12:39:14 PM
The poor woman! I hope she feels better much quicker than that!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 02 December, 2010, 11:27:31 PM
woke with a bad back on tuesday which got progressivly worser as the day went on...deep heat hot baths and paramol and its easing on day two hoprefully be well to root for the decs in the attic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 December, 2010, 06:52:18 PM
It's the office christmas party tonight and I'm working till 8. All my mates are already out having pre-do drinkies, while I'm sitting here in my best clobber clockwatching and manning a phone that hardly ever rings on a Friday evening.

I do look particularly fine tonight though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 03 December, 2010, 07:46:04 PM
Knocking off time soon then. Have fun!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 03 December, 2010, 07:48:43 PM
My Playstation is bollocksed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 December, 2010, 10:46:45 PM
I just had one of my interesting moments where i was downstairs in the kitchen snacking and i had an urge to check on the outside courtyard and to see what the weather was doing.

What was interesting was i caught someone off the street loitering just inside the yard by the gates.This is where someone who is a friend of someone else who lives here has locked their bike up against the gate which was open.I sensed this individual was up to no good so i stood on the doorstep eating and stared right at him without saying a word until he got the message and left which took about 30 seconds as he knew he was being watched.

I quite often get the feeling that something is up without knowing exactly why particularly if its someone who is in my space lurking around who shouldnt be.Finely tuned senses.Unfortunately i now feel unsettled rather than relaxed.

Also a double glazed unit in the window upstairs here has failed because somehow it has filled itself up with water as there is a line of water about a quarter of the way up inside between the glass.I noticed this yesterday but the night before last it was alright because i was watching the snow through it so i am at a loss to explain this as the ouside of the window is watertight as i replaced all the wooden beading around the glass with putty so if i clipped the edge of the double glazed unit with a small nail then why didnt it immediately fail ??

I cant work out where all the water came from either.

Anyway now it has to be replaced.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 04 December, 2010, 05:12:04 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 03 December, 2010, 10:46:45 PM
What was interesting was i caught someone off the street loitering just inside the yard by the gates.This is where someone who is a friend of someone else who lives here has locked their bike up against the gate which was open.I sensed this individual was up to no good so i stood on the doorstep eating and stared right at him without saying a word until he got the message and left which took about 30 seconds as he knew he was being watched.

I quite often get the feeling that something is up without knowing exactly why particularly if its someone who is in my space lurking around who shouldnt be.Finely tuned senses.

I think this  (http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,31147.0.html)might be for you Peter.

If a new costumed vigilante appears on our streets dressed in clothes with a canine motif.... we'll be sure to keep his identity secret.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 December, 2010, 05:23:55 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 04 December, 2010, 05:12:04 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 03 December, 2010, 10:46:45 PM
What was interesting was i caught someone off the street loitering just inside the yard by the gates.This is where someone who is a friend of someone else who lives here has locked their bike up against the gate which was open.I sensed this individual was up to no good so i stood on the doorstep eating and stared right at him without saying a word until he got the message and left which took about 30 seconds as he knew he was being watched.

I quite often get the feeling that something is up without knowing exactly why particularly if its someone who is in my space lurking around who shouldnt be.Finely tuned senses.

I think this  (http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,31147.0.html)might be for you Peter.

If a new costumed vigilante appears on our streets dressed in clothes with a canine motif.... we'll be sure to keep his identity secret.

I am not making any of that up and another impediment to add to that is the bike itself which the owner has just locked up and left for an unknown length of time and they cant be contacted by telephone so its a nuisance as it has been there for nearly 2 weeks already and i am tired of looking at it already and it makes it very difficult to close the gates.

SIGH.................

There is always someone creating a problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 04 December, 2010, 05:39:29 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 04 December, 2010, 05:23:55 PM
I am not making any of that up

It's okay, I didn't think you was, I was just pulling your leg. I find that ESP type stuff genuinely interesting.


Quoteand another impediment to add to that is the bike itself which the owner has just locked up and left for an unknown length of time and they cant be contacted by telephone so its a nuisance as it has been there for nearly 2 weeks already and i am tired of looking at it already and it makes it very difficult to close the gates.

SIGH.................

There is always someone creating a problem.

I know what you mean. It's a shame some people don't take more responsibility for their own stuff. It's like a while ago I smelt gas outside someone's house. I ended up calling it in, thinking that maybe I was being overly paranoid. Next thing I know the gas company were digging up the road. (There was also a hazard sign in their front garden...) It irritated me that people wouldn't report such things outside their own houses.

(To be fair the person might have been away, and I think I might have an especially sensitive nose to such things. Either that or my paranoid mind was wired to notice such things. I actually came down with a bit of anxiety over this, phoning up the Gas emergency number 2-3 times a week at one point whenever I though I smelt something. Freaky thing is, 60-80% of the time I turned out to be right. Trust a bunch of gas leaks to occur when I was going through a paranoid period.)

Concerning the bike, I shouldn't worry about it though. If it gets nicked it's the owner's fault for not taking better care of his belongings.  Not that I'm suggesting you stand by if you notice of course. I think you did the right thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 05 December, 2010, 12:36:49 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 04 December, 2010, 05:39:29 PM


Concerning the bike, I shouldn't worry about it though. If it gets nicked it's the owner's fault for not taking better care of his belongings.  Not that I'm suggesting you stand by if you notice of course. I think you did the right thing.

Its the 4th time in the last year or so i have caught someone furtively lurking around in here [under similar circumstances] and i am not having it.A few years ago i had a new mountain bike stolen that wasnt cheap by some lowlife off the street when it was left in the courtyard when my back was turned during daytime which i was infuriated by so since then i have become fiercely territorial if i find anyone in here who shouldnt be in here of the criminal element.I either request that they leave if i catch them or they leave by force.Either way they leave and either way they dont come back.

My neighbour on one side lives in the house next door on her own and she wont appreciate anyone lurking around in the dark either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 05 December, 2010, 03:59:46 PM
I've noticed a similar, if slightly more amusing thing involving a moped (amusing to everyone else,doubt the moped owner will find it funny).

For the last week or so a moped has been chained to a lamp-post close to where i live.
Maybe it ran out of fuel and instead of pushing the (obviously very heavy and unweildy) vehicle home they chained to the post.

Well driving by it this morning it appears that someone has ploughed a car into it. There's some broken glass,links of chain,the moped a good 6-10 feet from where it started and the whole scene tied up with festive police tape.

All that road and someone manages to lose it at that spot!!

Bet he wishes he pushed it home now.....or he will when he finds out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 December, 2010, 11:37:14 AM
I've virtually lost my voice today. My employers don't seem to regard this as an impediment to telephone work, so I'm croaking away as best as possible.

Also, I did absolutely no work on my advent calendar thing over the weekend,  as I felt too ill and hungover from the office party on Friday (which was AWFUL, so I drank way too much to compensate - curse those sambuca shots).

This means my day off tomorrow is going to be filled up doing this - it requires no talent but hours of painstaking work, which is a pain in the arse!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 December, 2010, 01:14:16 PM
I also did no work on the advent calendar thingy this weekend. It's annoying. This cold has taken out 2 weekends and I haven't done any xmas shopping. I nearly fainted just putting up a 4ft plastic tree!

Oh well, I still have time to get everything done - must control panic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: davethomson on 06 December, 2010, 01:24:34 PM
I hate the snow. Not as much as I hate the railway commuters who, unable to find a parking space at the train station, have felt the need to park their cars in the residential parking. Especially the pillock with the red Citroen who has abandoned it behind my car, blocking me in. >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 December, 2010, 02:16:25 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 06 December, 2010, 01:14:16 PM
I also did no work on the advent calendar thingy this weekend. It's annoying. This cold has taken out 2 weekends and I haven't done any xmas shopping.

XMAS SHOPPING?  :o  Crap, that's another thing I haven't done!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 06 December, 2010, 04:19:07 PM
I'm writing something at the minute and got totally forgetful on the latest figure for the last Glacial Maximum (the nights fly in, I can tell ye). 'Aha!' said I, 'To the wibbely wall chart of graphs!'

So I looked. Got very confused and was questioning my understanding of the basics of isotope ratios, slowly raking up the old mind library when I realised...

...the graph axis read right to left, not left to right. Wasted about 20 minutes on it! ::)

M.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 06 December, 2010, 04:33:20 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 05 December, 2010, 12:36:49 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 04 December, 2010, 05:39:29 PM


Concerning the bike, I shouldn't worry about it though. If it gets nicked it's the owner's fault for not taking better care of his belongings.  Not that I'm suggesting you stand by if you notice of course. I think you did the right thing.

Its the 4th time in the last year or so i have caught someone furtively lurking around in here [under similar circumstances] and i am not having it.A few years ago i had a new mountain bike stolen that wasnt cheap by some lowlife off the street when it was left in the courtyard when my back was turned during daytime which i was infuriated by so since then i have become fiercely territorial if i find anyone in here who shouldnt be in here of the criminal element.I either request that they leave if i catch them or they leave by force.Either way they leave and either way they dont come back.

My neighbour on one side lives in the house next door on her own and she wont appreciate anyone lurking around in the dark either.

Perhaps an external light with an infra-red motion detector would help?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 06 December, 2010, 04:47:58 PM
I had to abandon my red citoren on some estate as I was in a rush for the train and couldn't get into the car park. I think I blocked some poor schmuk from getting out though, ah well.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: davethomson on 06 December, 2010, 05:17:01 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 06 December, 2010, 04:47:58 PM
I had to abandon my red citoren on some estate as I was in a rush for the train and couldn't get into the car park. I think I blocked some poor schmuk from getting out though, ah well.

You swine! I hope you can run fast as I am going to use these icicles hanging outside my window to spear you like Linda Lovelace! :lol:

The red Citroen has now moved and I missed it so I can't reprimand them for being such halfwits. If it comes back tomorrow I will build a giant snowcock on its roof.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 06 December, 2010, 05:21:34 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 06 December, 2010, 04:33:20 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 05 December, 2010, 12:36:49 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 04 December, 2010, 05:39:29 PM


Concerning the bike, I shouldn't worry about it though. If it gets nicked it's the owner's fault for not taking better care of his belongings.  Not that I'm suggesting you stand by if you notice of course. I think you did the right thing.

Its the 4th time in the last year or so i have caught someone furtively lurking around in here [under similar circumstances] and i am not having it.A few years ago i had a new mountain bike stolen that wasnt cheap by some lowlife off the street when it was left in the courtyard when my back was turned during daytime which i was infuriated by so since then i have become fiercely territorial if i find anyone in here who shouldnt be in here of the criminal element.I either request that they leave if i catch them or they leave by force.Either way they leave and either way they dont come back.

My neighbour on one side lives in the house next door on her own and she wont appreciate anyone lurking around in the dark either.

Perhaps an external light with an infra-red motion detector would help?

Thats a possibility although i usually keep the gates closed as that way i hear anyone entering and leaving if i can get rid of the twats bike that has been locked up against the gates.I know who has left the bike and i am either going to cut through the lock and move it or they are going to get a piece of my mind when they finally move it.Not sure which yet but i dont like people that take liberties.

I am not paranoid or obsessed about security btw.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 December, 2010, 10:11:10 AM
My whole family has Norovirus, I'm actually feeling a little better today but my four year old daughter is still in the thick of it and will miss her school trip to meet Father Christmas tomorrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2010, 10:33:25 AM
QuoteNorovirus

Ugh and double-ugh.  Sometimes Google is not your friend.

Commiserations, Rog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 December, 2010, 06:08:10 PM
 I had Norovirus once and it was like having some kind of tropical disease as i was violently ill.Watch out for dehydration once it starts to ease off as i was throwing up water at one point.It should clear pretty quickly after a day or so.

I just flew into a rage over something fairly trivial and i threw my headphones against the wall and they smashed.I wasnt in a bad mood previously and i havent been annoyed about anything for a long time but i would be lying if i said i didnt have anger management issues sometimes.

>:(

I need to calm down.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 December, 2010, 06:31:03 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 08 December, 2010, 10:11:10 AM
My whole family has Norovirus,

"Peter, hold my ears back..." (//http://)

Seriously, sorry to hear you're all ill. Norovirus - fun for all the family!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 December, 2010, 11:31:34 PM
I just watched Iron Man on DVD.It only cost a quid but i still feel cheated.

dreadful.

Back to the shop it goes where some unfortunate may get some enjoyment out of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 09 December, 2010, 06:43:42 PM
...Keep forgetting I had a wisdom tooth taken out yesterday. Just got a chip in there, felt weird.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 09 December, 2010, 07:00:31 PM
I was in a shop this afternoon after finishing work and i was irritated by other people i was surrounded by in the shop continually sniffing.There were 4 of them at it and every other second was SNIFFF - SNIFFF - SNIFF- and so on...These were adults as well and not children under the age of 12 as it is the behaviour of a small child.Why cant they just blow their noses ??

Some woman in a car was mouthing off at me because i went through a red light too quickly just as it changed to green on a bike even though i was absolutely nowhere near her car.I admit that i should have waited another second or two so i was in the wrong in that respect but the woman shouted out of the window "ANOTHER WANKER THAT SHOULD BE KILLED" which i took exception to so i caught up with her and had a word with her about it before she wound her window up and began to gesticulate with a wanker sign.

A 60 yr old [thats what she looked like] behaving like some stupid yob and i cant stand that kind of gesticulation and i never do it myself.A member of the public asked if there was a problem so i said there isnt a problem but there is a rancid old woman who looks like a scrubber in this car who should learn to keep her mouth shut.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 December, 2010, 07:37:02 AM
I miss Godpleton's posts.  Always guaranteed one good laugh a day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 10 December, 2010, 07:53:39 AM
He'll be back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 10 December, 2010, 04:02:16 PM
Cash was transferred into my account on Monday morning by a computerised transaction and the cash has left the account it came from and its now Friday and its not showing up in my account so where the fuck is it ??

This isnt good enough so here i go again with more phone calls and more time wasted because someone else somewhere has fucked up and they are obviously totally clueless as to what is going on because there has been no communication on their part explaining what the problem is so it will have to be brought to their attention.

Useless Cunts but whatever happens if the cash has gone astray then they will have to refund it as it was nothing to do with me or those who transferred the cash whatsoever.

I dont care about the reasons why as i want it sorted out because if the cash isnt in my account by Monday then someone has got a serious problem and its not me.I will be hard on them as they deserve it the same way i do if i screw up what i get paid to do.

I am sick of people and their errors and incompetence and mistakes.

Stop making fucking mistakes and get it right and make sure its right before you do it. >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DrJomster on 10 December, 2010, 11:13:30 PM
My arch nemesis, DrMouse, returned for a fourth thrilling encounter and battle of wits this evening! I found "yet another melonfarmin' hole" he could have got through, blocked it off and cleaned the floors once a bloomin' gain. Here's hoping there's no fifth instalment in our epic struggle...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 December, 2010, 08:52:52 PM
Because facebook "privacy settings" are SHIT.

I have now "banned" the same person FOUR TIMES from a group I admin. Each time he eventually just joins again. Despite being banned. He's even there, in the 'people who like this' list- with a little button next to him saying "un-ban him" and a little 'x' that allows me to, er, ban him. If you can make sense of that, you are a better man than I.

Anyway- I've banned him again, and REPORTED his profile for "inappropriate contact"- which is as close as facebook gets to allowing me to complain, ask for help, or do anything about it.

You'd think, after ten years, this psych creepy stalker would just! fuck! off! I swear, if ever I meet him again...

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 December, 2010, 09:09:06 PM
PW - unless both of the Banks involved are in the3 faster payments scheme, it can take up to 5 working days so don't be too hard on the poor counter/call centre staff just yet.

Jomster - during the great Mouse war of 2000, i had to resort to poison (and I call myself a vegetarian).

SBT - bad luck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 December, 2010, 09:50:51 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 14 December, 2010, 09:09:06 PM
PW - unless both of the Banks involved are in the3 faster payments scheme, it can take up to 5 working days so don't be too hard on the poor counter/call centre staff just yet.



Luckily it was an error on the part of my Mum who transferred the cash into the wrong bank account [one of her own] instead of mine so the problem is solved and corrected.

I am just glad i didnt complain to anyone before i found this out.I wouldnt have been that hard on anyone really as i was just sounding off more than anything as i am usually polite and reasonable in that type of situation unless i am being messed around.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 15 December, 2010, 12:54:57 AM
The hinge on the new bathroom cabinet isn't quite right so the door stays a little bit open.

(But other than that it's arsom).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Aaron A Aardvark on 15 December, 2010, 08:45:24 AM
Oo, moaning.

Let's see: I've got an eye infection, my toilet's blocked, my TV broke down and I fell off my bike on the ice.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 15 December, 2010, 09:49:30 AM
Let's hope your mum doesn't find out you called her a useless cunt , Peter... :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 December, 2010, 10:07:13 AM
Quote from: Aaron A Aardvark on 15 December, 2010, 08:45:24 AM
Let's see: I've got an eye infection, my toilet's blocked, my TV broke down and I fell off my bike on the ice.

Surely your woman done done you bad too?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 15 December, 2010, 12:02:36 PM
car is in the garage, insurance renewal is due...the 3 mile walk I used to take to work a few years ago is now a hellish ordeal

My feet hurt, there's no coffee in the office and they won't let me turn off the hellish striplighting
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 December, 2010, 03:19:50 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 15 December, 2010, 09:49:30 AM
Let's hope your mum doesn't find out you called her a useless cunt , Peter... :D

Dont even think about it   :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 December, 2010, 05:03:04 PM
Just had a Mexican Standoff in WH Smiths over Comic Heroes no4, what a joke!

Caz was down the town on Tuesday (the day it came out) and offered to get it for me, she came back empty handed saying that it was not in and even the manager told her that it wasn't in. Wednesday came, I sent her down again but to no avail.
Now we get to about an hour ago.

I looked on every part of the mag area, including the womens mags, just to make sure it was not there and you guessed it, it was nowhere to be seen. I found the manager and she said that someone had asked about that the other day (I wonder who that was).
Anyway, she looked on the computer for the mag and couldn't find it, I told her it was out on Tuesday all over the country but here. She looked again and couldn't find it and just looked at me. I said can you find out through your suppliers if it's here, the phone was in a queue and she gave up and just looked at me again.
I then asked her to input the name again into the computer but miss out the number 4 and unbelievably they had 26 in the store. She then looked at me and said that they'll be upstairs in the storeroom and that was the end of the sentence!
I glared at her for at least 20 seconds and asked if she could be bothered to get someone to go into the store room and get me a copy. She caved in and came back down with a copy.
Do they not want customers OR WHAT!


I must thank Smiths for their excellent customer service  >:(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 16 December, 2010, 05:58:48 PM
Well done for not snapping her neck like a twig CF. That's restraint of superhuman proportions sir.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 16 December, 2010, 06:31:00 PM
You wanna just tell Comic Heroes they're paying shelf rent for storage upstairs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 19 December, 2010, 01:16:43 PM
Mikey finishes writing that thing, decides to print out to proof read. Not enough paper!

Mikey decides to reformat for printing on measley amount of paper;single space, smaller font etc. Out of ink!

Mikey changes font colour to green to bypass black ink. Out of ink!

I never fuckin use this printer so the person that usually does SHOULD RESUPPLY STUFF THAT'S RUN OUT!

I hate proof reading on screen.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 December, 2010, 01:44:20 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 19 December, 2010, 01:16:43 PM
I hate proof reading on screen.

It's just about bearable when it's someone else's stuff, but when it's your own... it just isn't possible.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2010, 02:08:54 PM
My water pipes have frozen up. Cue me trying to finish my advent thingummy whilst doing silly things with a hair dryer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2010, 02:14:58 PM
On the plus side, it's just the weather for going all Ray Mears and melting snow to make tea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 19 December, 2010, 02:22:42 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2010, 02:14:58 PM
On the plus side, it's just the weather for going all Ray Mears and melting snow to make tea.


Only if you have to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2010, 02:26:24 PM
I have to, if only just to say I've done it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 December, 2010, 02:01:17 AM
A horrendous case of flu coincides with my first incontrovertible nightmare in years as I barely escape some effortlessly inexplicable Evangelion / Inception style metaphysical conflagration.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 20 December, 2010, 02:45:51 PM
yuk! Get well soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 20 December, 2010, 03:34:04 PM
First day off sick in a few years today. Had a cold for a week or so, which seems to have ramped up a gear overnight. Blew my nose yesterday and knackered something in my ear. Very painful indeed.... :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lackey on 20 December, 2010, 03:42:32 PM
not good mate. take it easy, and i hope you get better soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 20 December, 2010, 10:37:07 PM
I'm sitting here in my dressing gown with a nice glass of red wine, watching the snowflakes drift past my window.

I've just realised that I need to put the wheelie bin out.

Bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 21 December, 2010, 10:46:54 PM
decided to go to manchester shopping today for the missusussusues pressie the train was late and the bugger showed up half an hour late...
  then after a peruse in forbidden planet as she didnt know what to get me i got her a "meltdown man" and "al's baby" gns to give me on t'day. also got myself tour of duty cos ive lost me original!?!?!

  then the impediments began. the train home had been cancelled due to both signal failure and a broken track at leyland where i live so havindg a cold i couldnt hear the announcments well as im all bnged up. i asked the customer helpers as there were three fellas having a chat and all i got was " its just said it innit?"  then the train i normally got wasnt stopping at leyland so i thought i would have to get off art chorley and wait half an hour for a bus which would take the same again in this snow to get me home.... then a message flashed up saying the next train would be going to leyland yippee...then i saw the queue.  after much shoving i finally got a seat near the stoned/smacked up pissed scottish irish bolton half chorley lad (he was doing accents all the way home!)going to preston ...finally got home about three hours later than planned  and didnt have time to wrap any of minis pressies and i still have a coule of thing to get missis mogs and me mother.


and the dishwasher handles broke weve not had it a year yet. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 21 December, 2010, 10:52:34 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 21 December, 2010, 10:46:54 PM

and the dishwasher handles broke weve not had it a year yet. ::)

If it broke due to general usage, you should be able to claim on your manufacturer's warranty  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 22 December, 2010, 06:32:34 PM
The sofas for our new flat were supposed to arrive today, we've been waiting 5 weeks (sitting on bean bags) and were pretty excited when it looked like they were coming in time for xmas.

Excitement squashed when the delivery men arrived, then refused to deliver and left again. They'd come in a 30ft truck and the closest they could park was across the street, which despite being 20ft from my front door wasn't an option because they refused to cross the street with it for 'health and safety reasons'. We live 3 floors up so I suspect that translates to 'lazy fucker reasons'.

Apparently it's my fault for not telling them there might not be 30ft worth of parking space immediately outside the door, but anyone who thinks there's 30ft worth of parking space available anywhere in the center of fucking Glasgow needs to have a long hard look at themselves. Cocks.

Yours truly,
Couchless for Christmas
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 December, 2010, 06:39:34 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 22 December, 2010, 06:32:34 PM
Apparently it's my fault for not telling them there might not be 30ft worth of parking space immediately outside the door

Wait a minute, who anywhere in a city or suburb has 30 feet of parking space outside their door (except those rich gits with 10m long driveways, which are in any event unlikely to be suitable for their reversing purposes)?  That's insane - most planning regs require 1.5-2 car spaces per unit, which is what, 6m/20 feet, assuming they're end to end and not parallel like mine?.  Lazy arse motherfunters.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 22 December, 2010, 07:01:35 PM
Ha exactly the same with my DFS delivery - shoulda seen their faces when they pulled in and I told them I was 3 floors up! My God , you'd think I'd just asked to suck 'em off as a freebie!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 22 December, 2010, 07:16:15 PM
I know, sadly I couldn't vent too much because the delivery guys just drove straight past without stopping and I didn't want to give the girl in the callcentre an earful as it's not really her fault. Think my girlfriend is calling Next tonight to complain so will see where that gets us.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 December, 2010, 07:22:25 PM
I would demand that they get the sack so that their families have a shit Christmas, they falter on the mortgage, they then lose the house, the wife leaves them and takes the children and finally they commit suicide.
Now that might make them think twice, the lazy bastards  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 December, 2010, 07:26:07 PM
Why not come to the Yap Shop to ease your festive frustrations? ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 22 December, 2010, 07:54:43 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 December, 2010, 07:22:25 PM
I would demand that they get the sack so that their families have a shit Christmas, they falter on the mortgage, they then lose the house, the wife leaves them and takes the children and finally they commit suicide.
Now that might make them think twice, the lazy bastards  ::)

Bit extreme maybe, I'd probably settle for a new delivery date and a ten quid gift voucher or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 December, 2010, 03:21:47 PM
As I watch the blizzard outside, I'm becoming increasingly convinced that one of my colleague's unbelievably s-l-o-o-o-w work today is a ploy to ensure that we get snowed into this horrid office over Christmas so that she can murder me with an axe.   I'd planned to get out of here by 12, and I'm only waiting on her so that I can  lock up.   On the other hand  all work and no play make TB a dull boy all work and no play make TB a dull boy all work and no play make TB a dull boy... or should that be "black snow will fall forever"? 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 December, 2010, 06:33:40 PM
I have spent all afternoon going round shops not being able to find what i went out to the shops for.Useless.

Another thing i have been looking for is low energy LED lightbulbs.I mean the type that replace incandescent lightbulbs as i have an aversion to low energy CFL lightbulbs and i wont have them in the house as they are unhealthy and give off a horrible quality of light.Yet more Crap that the govt imposes on everyone.It seems like there is no choice whatsoever unless i buy online.I found some low energy halogen lightbulbs which will suffice for the time being.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Brigantian on 23 December, 2010, 07:06:30 PM
Quote from: strontium71 on 22 December, 2010, 07:01:35 PM
Ha exactly the same with my DFS delivery - shoulda seen their faces when they pulled in and I told them I was 3 floors up! My God , you'd think I'd just asked to suck 'em off as a freebie!!
Good grief that's quite a tip you were willing to make.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 23 December, 2010, 08:24:10 PM
Well, Couch Debacle 2010 rages on. When we called that night to find out the score we were told it would be with us within the hour. It wasn't.

They then told us it would be delivered this morning. It wasn't.

They then told me they would call tonight to arrange a date. They did! For New Years Eve, which sounded all sorts of great to me.

Unfortunately they booked another 30ft truck before reading the notes on the order so called back immediately to cancel it again. Apparently they're now going to call me tomorrow to arrange delivery some time next year. Hopefully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 December, 2010, 08:39:07 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 23 December, 2010, 08:24:10 PM
Well, Couch Debacle 2010 rages on. When we called that night to find out the score we were told it would be with us within the hour. It wasn't.

They then told us it would be delivered this morning. It wasn't.

They then told me they would call tonight to arrange a date. They did! For New Years Eve, which sounded all sorts of great to me.

Unfortunately they booked another 30ft truck before reading the notes on the order so called back immediately to cancel it again. Apparently they're now going to call me tomorrow to arrange delivery some time next year. Hopefully.

Disgraceful.

They sound like dipshits to me and i would have lost patience with them by now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lackey on 24 December, 2010, 11:55:53 PM
went into hospital to see the fracture clinic about my leg, it turns out its actuay worse than originally thought, so i was admitted into hospital care straight away, and i was prepped for a operation. then i waited. it took two days of constant waiting, filling my trousers and general unpleasantness (i wasnt able to eat, drink or go for a ciggy in 27 hours).
after the two day wait,iv been told when il get the operation. monday. atleast iv got a weekend pass, so im home for xmas and boxing day. just sucks iv asted two days focusing on how awesome food drink and ciggys are. ohh, and its about time, so merry xmas!!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 25 December, 2010, 10:06:45 AM
Bloody stereo died this morning, just spent an undisclosed period of time ripping it apart to get the thing to work. Thank God brute force works wonders, as we can now play our Christmas CD's.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 December, 2010, 10:42:01 AM
The cupboard shelf that holds all the plates broke in the night- causing all the plates to crash down onto the cups and glasses.
Shit.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 25 December, 2010, 03:39:43 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 25 December, 2010, 10:42:01 AM
The cupboard shelf that holds all the plates broke in the night- causing all the plates to crash down onto the cups and glasses.
Shit.
SBT

Probably caused by sleigh-landing vibrations. I'd sue.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 December, 2010, 11:19:14 AM
I was supposed to be meeting a friend today but unfortunately the friend emailed their mobile no wrongly as it is not being recognised after dialling it which is a complete pain as i cant make contact so therefore i cant go anywhere to meet up.

This is the kind of thing i get tired of as its not really that difficult to memorise your own phone number correctly and write it down correctly.I have tried calling others who would have the correct number but of course they are not answering the calls.

Fucking useless. >:(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 27 December, 2010, 05:21:34 PM
37 hours, 17 minutes, 14 seconds. Level 21 character.

Now New Vegas decides I can no longer look up, down, or turn around. Fuck sake!

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jared Katooie on 27 December, 2010, 07:17:43 PM
A real pro could keep going without little luxuries like those.

Recently, my mouse broke in the middle of a TF2 session. But I didn't back down, I just switched to my Wacom tablet and charged back into battle, spinning around in circles and firing continuously.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 December, 2010, 08:13:28 PM
DVD region coding

I have yet to hear a convincing reasonable argument for the existence of region coding.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 December, 2010, 08:14:29 PM
Profit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 December, 2010, 11:01:50 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 29 December, 2010, 08:14:29 PM
Profit.

Wozzat then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 30 December, 2010, 08:37:03 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 December, 2010, 08:13:28 PM
DVD region coding

I have yet to hear a convincing reasonable argument for the existence of region coding.

The fact that different distributors own the rights to films in different countries? And if distributor A releases a region free version in their territory import sales might damage the value of distributor B's distribution deal?

Just a guess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 December, 2010, 05:27:16 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 30 December, 2010, 08:37:03 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 December, 2010, 08:13:28 PM
DVD region coding

I have yet to hear a convincing reasonable argument for the existence of region coding.

The fact that different distributors own the rights to films in different countries? And if distributor A releases a region free version in their territory import sales might damage the value of distributor B's distribution deal?

Just a guess.

It can be circumvented anyway with additional firmware and various hacks which makes region coding pointless.the film companies can do what they like but i find it a problem that film companies can dictate the inner workings of my computer meaning i can only switch the region coding 5 times.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 December, 2010, 06:11:20 PM
You could always use DVD ripping software such as DVDFab to make yourself a personal, region-free backup copy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 30 December, 2010, 07:11:29 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 30 December, 2010, 05:27:16 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 30 December, 2010, 08:37:03 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 December, 2010, 08:13:28 PM
DVD region coding

I have yet to hear a convincing reasonable argument for the existence of region coding.

The fact that different distributors own the rights to films in different countries? And if distributor A releases a region free version in their territory import sales might damage the value of distributor B's distribution deal?

Just a guess.

It can be circumvented anyway with additional firmware and various hacks which makes region coding pointless.



Aye, I'm sure the fact that someone will undoubtedly find an illegal way around it should be a deterrent for them even trying. Thinking about it we should probably stop locking our doors too, burglars would just find a way in anyway ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 December, 2010, 08:10:32 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 30 December, 2010, 07:11:29 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 30 December, 2010, 05:27:16 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 30 December, 2010, 08:37:03 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 December, 2010, 08:13:28 PM
DVD region coding

I have yet to hear a convincing reasonable argument for the existence of region coding.

The fact that different distributors own the rights to films in different countries? And if distributor A releases a region free version in their territory import sales might damage the value of distributor B's distribution deal?

Just a guess.

It can be circumvented anyway with additional firmware and various hacks which makes region coding pointless.



Aye, I'm sure the fact that someone will undoubtedly find an illegal way around it should be a deterrent for them even trying. Thinking about it we should probably stop locking our doors too, burglars would just find a way in anyway ;)

You can buy region free DVD players but it seems like you are suggesting that its illegal to workaround region codes for personal/private use so i need to look that up to verify wether or not that is illegal or if any kind of circumventing of region codes is illegal.

Theres nothing written on the packaging of the DVD i have here that states anything at all about region codes and their associated restrictions.

In any event there is a huge amount of info and firmware etc available online and whats more you can buy multi-region/region free DVD players and half the time the manufacturers dont even bother to include the circuitry/programs that allow the 5 times only region resets in their DVD players so again whats the point ?

I dont know right now wether there are any legalities covering this but i cant find any references to any without doing more searching so lets presume for now that it isnt illegal but if film studios complain that region code breaking is losing them revenue and this that and the other while doing nothing about what i have already pointed out is like leaving your door open all day and all night permanently and then complaining if you are cleaned out of anything of value.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 January, 2011, 12:00:36 AM
Swede was too bitter to eat this Christmas, even after my sense of taste had returned to normal. That was some pretty revolting stuff: no sweetness to it at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 03 January, 2011, 01:01:29 AM
I do wish more 2000ad creators on Facebook would be set so you could become fans rather than friends.

Just makes more sense.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 04 January, 2011, 12:37:54 PM
Yeah I know what you mean. Feels a bit presumptious and stalkerish to add them as friends if they don't have a professional page set up....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2011, 08:18:17 PM
I just sent off my gas & electricity readings for the last quarter and I'm still in credit, which is good but the weird thing is that we seem to have only used 2 units of electricity on the night tariff  :eh:

Now I'm gonna have to bloody well ring them up tomorrow to ask what is going on!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 January, 2011, 08:21:41 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2011, 08:18:17 PM
I just sent off my gas & electricity readings for the last quarter and I'm still in credit, which is good but the weird thing is that we seem to have only used 2 units of electricity on the night tariff  :eh:

Now I'm gonna have to bloody well ring them up tomorrow to ask what is going on!

Use more power at night then.

That will fix the problem.

:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 January, 2011, 08:29:56 PM
That's when I'm on here or watching stuff and the washer comes on every night and finishes before the normal price starts! It's bloody weird....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 04 January, 2011, 11:31:08 PM
Count yerself lucky CF, our last readings ended in an almighty row. Pay X amount a month to cover yearly bill. On paper everything fine....pay more in than you use in summer, in winter you break even or use a bit more, but it all evens out over the year. But no, our provider thinks that since we use more than we pay for over the winter that they wil try to jack up monthly payments by nearly £50 quid. Wouldn't be as pissed off if they asked but just dropped it into bottom of the statement as a "by the way". After several calls and general grumpy fuck attitude they agreed to making it a bit lower....they still cant accept that overall it works out!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 05 January, 2011, 04:50:49 PM
Just got off the phone to EON and can't believe how long it took to explain that using 2 units of electricity in a 3 month period is wrong. After ages of stupidity the lady said that it looks like the meter is malfunctioning and instead of running at 75% Day and 25% Night, it looks like it is set at 99% Day and 1% Night.
They are coming out to sort the meter out later this month, no hurry then!


Emp, I had that when they just up your debit and I did the same, a quick call to tell them to bring it down and if there was anything unpaid at the end of the year, then I would pay it then. Guess what, there wasn't!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 05 January, 2011, 07:50:39 PM
My Xbox is freezing up when I have it on for a couple of minutes, and on going through the troubleshooting thingy on the website, I have discovered it is a problem with the hard drive.

A question for the tech bods here- is this fixable, or is it easier to just buy a new HD? (I've plenty of Amamzon Christmas money left and can get one easy enough).

Thanks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 05 January, 2011, 10:47:00 PM
anyone?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 January, 2011, 10:48:17 PM
Hard Drives are so cheap these days I guess that's the best option.

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 05 January, 2011, 10:54:47 PM
Quote from: Banners on 05 January, 2011, 10:48:17 PM
Hard Drives are so cheap these days I guess that's the best option.

M@

Kinda what I thought! Cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 06 January, 2011, 03:31:11 PM
I had to do a presentation to some academic bods today on my project. It's meant to be a chance for some feedback on what you've done, suggestions on methodolgy etc. The panel should be people who, like, know your subject area and junk and should include your supervisor.

My supervisor didn't weigh in and the other peeps what know about that thing I do are on leave, so what was the point exactly? Waste a fuckin time, that's what. :rolleyes:

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 06 January, 2011, 04:13:55 PM
Did you take the opportunity to call them a bucket of c*nts Mikey?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 07 January, 2011, 06:41:23 AM
That's what i'm at today, Kerrin!

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 07 January, 2011, 07:17:08 AM
I'm 30 today :(

I'm sure 30 isn't actually that old, but I'm a bit of a miserable sod by default so cue lots of soul searching!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 07 January, 2011, 09:25:43 AM
Happy birthday Keef!

30 you say? Pfft! You are but a youngling!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 07 January, 2011, 11:25:55 AM
Quote from: Mikey on 07 January, 2011, 09:25:43 AM
Happy birthday Keef!

30 you say? Pfft! You are but a youngling!

M.

Thanks! I've decided to spend the day drinking fizzy pop and playing video games in an effort to stunt any maturity that might set in.

On a happy 2000AD-related note, my girlfriend tracked down and bought the prog from the week I was born which I thought was a pretty awesomely thoughtful thing to do. The situation has been upgraded from minor impediment to major groovy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 January, 2011, 11:49:18 AM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 07 January, 2011, 11:25:55 AM
my girlfriend tracked down and bought the prog from the week I was born

The fact that this is even an option for you depresses me!

Happy Birthday you young whippersnapper!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 07 January, 2011, 12:15:36 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 07 January, 2011, 07:17:08 AM
I'm 30 today :(

Happy Birthday!

If it makes you feel any better I'm 40 tomorrow. Oh Christ, that hasn't helped me at all. I think I might just start drinking now and stop some time Sunday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 12:29:06 PM
...Because one of my girlfriend's friends is getting married this summer in Italy and I have to pay out for flights, hotels for a whole weekend, new suit etc.

But the thing is - I hardly even know the couple who are getting married - I've literally met them two or three times - and we have to travel, and stay with a lot of my girlfriend's mates and their partners, all of whom I have precisely zero in common with, and a couple of whom are utter twats (my girlfriend doesn't have much in common with them either, but they are mostly her childhood friends...).

I've already had a few minor rows about this with my girlfriend, but I think it's a bit unreasonable/presumptuous to hold your wedding abroad and essentially force innocent bystanders like me to fork out hundreds of pounds to attend. Any of you lot agree?

I should point out that neither the bride nor groom have any Italian blood.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 07 January, 2011, 12:38:29 PM
It's a knotty problem if your girlfriend is really up for going. If it was me I'd realise that it was my auntie's/uncle's/part time postman's 60th/barmitzvah/funeral, and swerve it.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2011, 12:38:40 PM
I've felt that way about weddings (of my wife's friends/family) that were just down the country, but entailed an expensive multi-night hotel stay, and it can be a hell of an imposition.  However,  the one wedding I've been to in Italy (in Lucca, again a friend of the missus) turned out to be a really great trip.  I'd suggest trying to make it into a mini-holiday, work out where and when you actually need to be around the wedding party, and plan some sidetrips.  Nearly everybody that went to the Lucca wedding did this (some actually made a week out of it), and the couple had actually arranged for guides for walking tours in between the ceremony and the meal/party. There's a lot of hanging about involved in most weddings, see if you can make the most of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 12:55:36 PM
Thanks for your suggestions, but the flights are already booked. There was never any question that I'd be able to avoid it - my girlfriend would instantly see through an excuse if I did try.

I know I should try and make the most of it, but the people that will be attending.... I don't want to be nasty about it - some of them I can get along with perfectly fine when they pop round for a cup of tea, but when they're in a group I find it very hard to get along with them - especially the blokes who are unbearable arseholes almost without exception. Very laddish, shallow, preening types who I find it almost impossible to even make small talk with.

Had to go to a wedding reception with the same crowd last summer and though we were only there for a couple of hours I found it very trying. I'm genuinely dreading a whole weekend of it... :(

Perhaps I could try and get some valium for the flight...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2011, 01:17:40 PM
Ouch.  I went to a wedding a few years ago with a similar-sounding crowd, and it was pretty grim. Happily the hotel venue had a swimming pool in the basement which missus, sprog and I vanished off to as soon as each compulsory element ended.  Quite funny hanging up a tux in a pool changing room.  The rest of the time I tried to be as drunk as possible.  Whereabouts in Italy are you off to, Radiator?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2011, 01:21:42 PM
Quoteespecially the blokes who are unbearable arseholes almost without exception. Very laddish, shallow, preening types who I find it almost impossible to even make small talk with.

Oh man, I feel your pain on this one.
Nothing worse than being stuck at a BBQ or party and left with a group of men talking about fucking well football or cricket or rugby- subjects I not only have no interest in, but have no knowledge whatsoever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 07 January, 2011, 01:35:04 PM
Quote from: Richmond ClementsNothing worse than being stuck ...with a group of men talking about fucking well football or cricket...

On the contrary - football is so universal that it's a wonderful ice-breaker. It's inherently geographical so when someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

No other subject comes close to being all-encompassing amongst men.

I did try to start up conversations about my passions for Judge Dredd, Ken Loach films, London's Burning and the latest album by some 80s Paisley Underground survivor - but you get to be far more popular if you make reference to the beautiful game.

M@

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2011, 01:41:25 PM
Quotewhen someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

Did you make this up or is it a truefact?
(I'm aware I may be making a fool of muself here, as the surname could be a comedy name you've made up!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 07 January, 2011, 01:45:48 PM
Quite true (http://www.thisisplymouth.co.uk/pafc/argyle/GRATEFUL-PILGRIMS/article-3057423-detail/article.html)...(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 07 January, 2011, 01:47:10 PM
Quote from: Banners on 07 January, 2011, 01:35:04 PM
Quote from: Richmond ClementsNothing worse than being stuck ...with a group of men talking about fucking well football or cricket...

On the contrary - football is so universal that it's a wonderful ice-breaker. It's inherently geographical so when someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

No other subject comes close to being all-encompassing amongst men.

I did try to start up conversations about my passions for Judge Dredd, Ken Loach films, London's Burning and the latest album by some 80s Paisley Underground survivor - but you get to be far more popular if you make reference to the beautiful game.

M@



I agree with Banners 100 per cent, he is absolutely right and I came to the realisation many years ago. Unfortunately, try as I might, I just was incapable of learning anything about it. I really did try, as I work in an office with 3 other guys who talk about nothing but football all day long and I am constantly sitting at my desk like Billy No Mates while they natter away happily. I know I could get involved if I could just somehow pay attention to the sports news, or read the sports pages in the free newspaper I get on the train in the morning, but every time I try my eyes just glaze over and my brain goes into automatic shutdown. Cant be done, wish it could!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 07 January, 2011, 01:50:57 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2011, 01:41:25 PM
Quotewhen someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

Did you make this up or is it a truefact?
(I'm aware I may be making a fool of muself here, as the surname could be a comedy name you've made up!)

Being a Brighton and Hove Albion supporter I can confirm that is a true fact. Now, what do you think about David Beckham possibly going to Spurs on loan?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2011, 01:56:33 PM
Quote from: Van Dom on 07 January, 2011, 01:47:10 PM
I agree with Banners 100 per cent, he is absolutely right and I came to the realisation many years ago. Unfortunately, try as I might, I just was incapable of learning anything about it.

So true, it's the lingua franca of small talk!  I tried, really tried, to learn enough about soccer or at least hurling to get by in casual conversation, even to the point of reading the sports pages every morning on the bus, but I just can't hold it together and am swiftly exposed as a fake.  I come from a completely sports-obsessed family, so on meeting anyone who knows my brothers (a national-level coach and a triathlete respectively) or my parents (rugby, soccer and cricket fans) they immediately try to engage me in sports-type conversation, which always ends badly.  It's my poor son I feel badly for - despite the attempts of his uncle and grandad to teach him the rudiments of baseline sports knowledge, it's something I just can't provide in the home.  His Greek mythology is coming along fine, but I can't help feeling it's not the same - whether Hercules cheated on the 12th task by getting Atlas' help just doesn't come up that often.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2011, 02:02:31 PM
Quote from: Albion on 07 January, 2011, 01:50:57 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2011, 01:41:25 PM
Quotewhen someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

Did you make this up or is it a truefact?
(I'm aware I may be making a fool of muself here, as the surname could be a comedy name you've made up!)

Being a Brighton and Hove Albion supporter I can confirm that is a true fact. Now, what do you think about David Beckham possibly going to Spurs on loan?  ;)

Well I never!

I have, of course, heard of Beckham. He plays for America.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 07 January, 2011, 02:03:54 PM
Radiator: in this, swine flu is your friend. Easy-to-fake symptoms, and a lot of lying down and groaning before she leaves. That's what i'd do.

Tordleback, i honestly had you down as a man sports fan. I think i assumed a 'tordleback' was some position in rugby or something!

As for football icebreakers, i usually find 'i know nothing about football, but i love watersports' works at the parties i go to.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 07 January, 2011, 02:06:04 PM
'Man sports fan' sounds infinitely filthier than i meant. 'Mad sports fan' was what i was going for.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 07 January, 2011, 02:06:12 PM
It's always surprised me at how little talk of sport there is on here, which is unlike any other forum I use. Most have a sport section for people to use if they want. I mean, England have just won the Ashes in Australia for the first time in 24 years yet I don't think there has been one mention of it on here since the series started in November.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 07 January, 2011, 02:08:09 PM
Me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79QDhBtmDdk

I dont 'get' sport at all

I mean well done to people for taking part and all that, but someone else winning something makes me feel nothing really

Thie talk of 'we' when referring to a bunch of millionires from a town you will never visit is not for me
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 02:11:52 PM
Reminds me of this Armando Ianucci sketch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EbPsK6shaQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EbPsK6shaQ)

QuoteOn the contrary - football is so universal that it's a wonderful ice-breaker. It's inherently geographical so when someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

No other subject comes close to being all-encompassing amongst men.

I did try to start up conversations about my passions for Judge Dredd, Ken Loach films, London's Burning and the latest album by some 80s Paisley Underground survivor - but you get to be far more popular if you make reference to the beautiful game.

Yes, I get all that (and there's no way in hell that I'd try and talk to them about comics or anything like that), it's just that... I..... hate football.... and all other sport...

I listen to 5Live quite a bit, but would much prefer that station if they never mentioned sport - whenever they jump to a sports news item or the sports bulletin comes on they may as well be broadcasting white noise - I just don't hear it!

I used to work in a godawful chain restaurant in my student days. The manager, a boorish, chubby little jobsworth, would always start football conversations with the male employees as a lazy way to bond with the staff.

I used to sarcastically join in with these little chats, adopting an exaggerated laddy persona and vociferously agreeing or disagreeing with whatever he was saying and bluffing my way through - despite knowing zero about football. This used to entertain my dim-witted, easy to impress colleagues no end, but it always left the manager utterly bemused - he could never tell whether I was being serious or not.

QuoteOh man, I feel your pain on this one.
Nothing worse than being stuck at a BBQ or party and left with a group of men talking about fucking well football or cricket or rugby- subjects I not only have no interest in, but have no knowledge whatsoever.

I think a large part of the problem is that I'm (relatively) young, work in the media and don't have any kids - so I'm kind of surrounded by like-minded, similarly aged, creative types 24/7. You can kind of forget how to talk to people out in the real world  :).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 07 January, 2011, 02:30:18 PM
Fitba - nope. Unless it's the world cup, but I still feel fraudulent.

Rugby - yup. As far as I used to play and like watching it. Not big on the stats.

Cars - jebus no! They've four wheels, can look nice and go on petroleum distillates. That's it. Stop talking in word/letter combinations about engines! Car bores are the worst for me because they remind me of me da.

My advice, Radiator, is to get topped up on good chianti and grappa, then who gives a shit? Waffle on about your passions and they'll soon bugger off! And like TB says, try to make the best of being in Italy if you're being pressed into spending the dabs.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 02:41:12 PM
QuoteMy advice, Radiator, is to get topped up on good chianti and grappa, then who gives a shit? Waffle on about your passions and they'll soon bugger off!

But that's exactly what I don't want - to end up sitting alone on a table, drunk!  :D

I vividly recall an incident at the last wedding I went to with this crowd - I tried to strike up a conversation with one of the 'lads'. It went like this:

Me: "Alright"
Him: "Alright"

(pause)

Me: "So, you having a good day?"

...and that was it - he got distracted by someone/something and walked away. To be fair, he was a lot more drunk than I was, but even so! If I can't even get past hello with these people, what chance do I have?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 07 January, 2011, 03:09:39 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 02:41:12 PM
Me: "Alright"
Him: "Alright"
(pause)

Sounds like my experience at the recent work Xmas party. Bloody painful. Everyone in the department I work for pulled out at the last minute (other than one who conked out after 10 mins – turned out to be a food allergy). Most others are usually really cliquey with their departments. So often I curse myself for going to such dos. On the basis of that I almost boycotted the other Xmas work activities. In the end I attended two out of three meals and one other drink session and actually had a great time as others that I work with attended those.

On footie – afraid I'm one of the odd one's out here. While I'm not nuts about football I am into it and am really looking forward to the match I'm going to in February. The Mrs and a quite a few other people we know are also going. In fact the Mrs has probably been more keen than me to go since the last match we saw in 2005. That was an international match so the types of fans we will be coming across in the premiership will be completely different.

There are aspects of the beautiful game I don't like though, such as why one must hate with a vengeance the fans of any other local (or not so local clubs).

Oh, and another thing I am really looking forward to is the wedding we are hopefully off to abroad this year. The generous groom (my cousin) is offering to pay for hotels. We are going to try and make a holiday of it and stay nearby for a couple of weeks and take up the offer for a stay at the hotel for a couple of days.

Hopefully you will be staying in a good location radiator and can have a break from the wedding guests at some point.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: davethomson on 07 January, 2011, 03:47:21 PM
Radiator - I find those situations when you have nothing to talk about with someone are a perfect opportunity to lie outrageously. Tell them you invented Iron Man, played for the Claymores as a star quarterback, gave David Cameron advice on procuring affordable eastern European prostitutes for the cabinet meetings, and had your nose broken by Andre the Giant because you called him "wee man".

I find it beats abusing the wedding sauce on your own and helps the day pass quicker.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 January, 2011, 04:22:54 PM
On the subject of unreasonably expensive invites, I dread being invited on a stag nights nowadays. In my time it meant a pub, a club, maybe a stripjoint, and handcuffing the groom to a lampost. Nowadays it's a frigging weekend in Prague or paintballing in Dublin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2011, 04:35:34 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 02:41:12 PM
Me: "Alright"
Him: "Alright"

(pause)

Me: "So, you having a good day?"

...and that was it - he got distracted by someone/something and walked away.

Wait, I thought that was conversation.  There's more?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 07 January, 2011, 04:51:09 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 12:55:36 PM
especially the blokes who are unbearable arseholes almost without exception. Very laddish, shallow, preening types who I find it almost impossible to even make small talk with.

Had to go to a wedding reception with the same crowd last summer and though we were only there for a couple of hours I found it very trying. I'm genuinely dreading a whole weekend of it... :(

Perhaps I could try and get some valium for the flight...


How awful.


You have my sympathy.

I dont even think i could word one sentence about football as i hate it so much as well as all sport but i would probably start a conversation about how much i hate sport and football and how they are overpaid twats and see how that goes but on second thoughts its not hard to imagine what the response to that would be....

Would it be too much to ask if they were to not talk about football constantly ??


For the flight though i recommend listening to music through headphones as it will block out their boring football based yapping.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 06:20:09 PM
QuoteIt's always surprised me at how little talk of sport there is on here, which is unlike any other forum I use.

And I'm grateful for that!  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2011, 07:39:48 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 January, 2011, 06:20:09 PM
QuoteIt's always surprised me at how little talk of sport there is on here, which is unlike any other forum I use.

And I'm grateful for that!  :)

There is however, a surprising amount of talk about cheese.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 07 January, 2011, 08:17:07 PM
I was sitting at the computer just now and typing and listening to music through headphones as i often do.Then i stopped what i was doing and got up and left the headphones on the floor next to the desk and somehow they got caught up with my foot as i wasnt watching what i was doing which resulted in the headphone lead being yanked really hard resulting in no sound.

Great

>:(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 07 January, 2011, 09:04:22 PM
I'm not a sports fan either and tend to glaze over (or switch over) when it's on.

This instructional video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uoM6p7ueao) might be of aid for football conversations though...

Incidentally that's a very funny episode of The IT Crowd (Are We not Men?). I totally empathised with the characters in this match scene (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f27IqVo5-Oc).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 07 January, 2011, 10:34:26 PM
It's easy to talk about football. Just mention how much you hate Man Utd then just fill in with, under worked, over paid, smug, faceless, mardy, arrogant. The list could go on and on.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 January, 2011, 10:34:58 PM
I've just got home, slightly pissed, to find a late birthday present from my brother. The jiffy bag had so much sellotape on it, I attacked it with a pair of scissors - and thereby cut a inch-long chunk out of a very cool Batman T-shirt -  one of the best presents I've ever had off him.

bollox
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 07 January, 2011, 10:48:58 PM
Well, I have mentioned football on here - on the life's fantastic thread - when I found out, reading an old annual I think, that Mike McMahon is a fellow Gooner! (Arsenal fan).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 12:55:43 AM
Grrrr, just found out I missed a creditors' meeting today for one of my many deadbeat clients.  Not that it matters, since we aren't getting anything from them anyway, but I'd have enjoyed a bit of cathartic shouting.  Apparently they can walk away from €40 million debts (they owe me €6K, either chickenfeed or half my gross wage for last year, depending on how you look at it), but get to keep their many other companies because of some clever Isle of Man shenanigans.  

Also, my favourite free festival has been cancelled after 10 ever-improving years. 

I need a drink.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 January, 2011, 01:07:16 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 12:55:43 AM
Also, my favourite free festival has been cancelled after 10 ever-improving years.

Which one was that then? My favourite festival (the big green gathering) died a couple of years ago due to police sabotage/hippy incompetence (delete as appropriate) so I feel your pain.

As for the debt thingy - I've never run a business, but the way people can get away with not paying for stuff never ceases to amaze me. Someone is trying to get a private members bill through to make 30 days payment terms legally enforceable, but apparently its got very little chance in the face of the business lobby,.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 January, 2011, 01:11:43 AM
I had some duck with gravy yesterday but it tasted a bit funny. Gradually it dawned on me that mother had just shoved some duck l'orange into witless incongruence, bursting in on a conventional gravy based dinner. Yorkshire puddings were there. As ridicule orbs.




I need adequately contextualised meat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 08 January, 2011, 01:52:21 AM
Quote from: Banners on 07 January, 2011, 01:35:04 PM
On the contrary - football is so universal that it's a wonderful ice-breaker. It's inherently geographical so when someone says they're from Brighton you can go, "oh, we just sold Craig Noone to you lot" for example.

I'm from Brighton. I've never heard of Craig no-one. My contribution to the conversation would be limited to "no, sorry, I don't follow sport." It's not as universal as all that, really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 08 January, 2011, 02:00:03 AM
Growing up - I had no interest whatsoever in football, or any sport. But I had a 'Road to Damascus' moment 20-odd years ago, and now understand the beauty,comedy,tradgedy, poetry & art that is found in sport. And in no other sport is that beauty, poetry & art better exspressed than in football. In particular, the football playing of Arsenal FC.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 08 January, 2011, 02:08:50 AM
I prefer darts, a man's sport.


(http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/11_02/078fordham2_468x469.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 10:14:05 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 08 January, 2011, 01:52:21 AM
I've never heard of Craig no-one.

Hey, wouldn't it be good if he was Captain, though?  Imagine the Nautilus pulling up at the Pier!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 08 January, 2011, 10:15:53 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare
As for the debt thingy - I've never run a business, but the way people can get away with not paying for stuff never ceases to amaze me. Someone is trying to get a private members bill through to make 30 days payment terms legally enforceable, but apparently its got very little chance in the face of the business lobby,.

This is an issue close to my heart, but legislation is unworkable because when a client is late in paying, one is far too worried about making a fuss and losing them. You are entitled, by law, to charge late payment interest but I never have.

Annoyingly, one of the first things you're taught when setting up a business is to pay your bills late. Effectively, you're getting interest-free credit, so the general principle is to use it for as long as you can get away with.

Annoyingly, it seems it's always the jobs that you have to rush through to meet a deadline that are the longest to get paid. They expect you to design and print a 20 page brochure in an afternoon, but the simple process of sending a cheque takes them three months.

We're currently waiting on payment from a restaurant for whom we designed and printed their menus. I am very tempted to go there, have a slap-up meal and loads of booze, and then when I'm presented with the bill, walk out and tell them I'll pay when I get around to it. Of course, I really don't have the balls...

If I walked out of Tesco without paying for a 10p tin of beans, I'd get arrested. If a client doesn't pay a bill for several thousand pounds on time - leading to cashflow problems, bank charges perhaps, and, sometimes, personal hardship - then nothing happens. It's a shame, but just the nature of things...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 08 January, 2011, 10:16:47 AM
Quote from: TordelBack
Quote from: House of Usher
I've never heard of Craig no-one.

Hey, wouldn't it be good if he was Captain, though?  Imagine the Nautilus pulling up at the Pier!

He was captain at Plymouth Argyle for a while, though sadly Plymouth doesn't have a pier(!)

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 10:20:13 AM
The awful part of clients not paying is that I am frequently left unable to pay my own suppliers on time, particularly since the bank will no longer extend us any kind of credit.  I therefore spend half of my days apologising on the phone to angry people, then the other half being that angry person listen to vacuous apologies.  Somewhere in between I'm supposed to be earning a living.  The only persons profiting in this exchange are Mr. Jameson and Mr. Power, who are now required to get me to sleep.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 12:59:10 PM
I always find the best way to protect yourself is by covering yourself with your paperwork and the wording in it has to be absolutely correct and by making sure that the client has nothing to complain about in terms of what they are paying for.

I have no time for people who take the piss or who think that they can get away with what amounts to theft of my time and who think that they can abuse my trust i have in them and my goodwill and if they are having problems financially i would much rather they were upfront about it so everyone concerned knows what is going on and wether anything can be worked out as i am prepared to be reasonable as all i ask is for them to be straight about it.

If not then they will face the consequences of their dishonesty and i am prepared to intimidate them and do all sorts of things to make sure they pay up and i find one way in particular is to relentlessly hassle them and to call them up repeatedly and even go and see them at home and that type of thing.

People will only take the piss if you allow them to do so.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 01:11:20 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 12:59:10 PM
If not then they will face the consequences of their dishonesty and i am prepared to intimidate them and do all sorts of things to make sure they pay up and i find one way in particular is to relentlessly hassle them and to call them up repeatedly and even go and see them at home and that type of thing.

We're way past that stage, I can assure you.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 01:27:44 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 01:11:20 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 12:59:10 PM
If not then they will face the consequences of their dishonesty and i am prepared to intimidate them and do all sorts of things to make sure they pay up and i find one way in particular is to relentlessly hassle them and to call them up repeatedly and even go and see them at home and that type of thing.

We're way past that stage, I can assure you.   

I dont know the details so i cant comment.

There was an instance where i was owed cash by someone who was trying to avoid paying.It wasnt very much as it was in the hundreds or 500 to be exact so after some gentle persuasion i went with them to the cashpoint as there are only so many unanswered calls and excuses i will tolerate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 08 January, 2011, 01:30:04 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 12:59:10 PMIf not then they will face the consequences of their dishonesty and i am prepared to intimidate them and do all sorts of things to make sure they pay up and i find one way in particular is to relentlessly hassle them and to call them up repeatedly and even go and see them at home and that type of thing.

Am I to assume that repeat business is not a major concern for you?

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 02:09:55 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 08 January, 2011, 01:30:04 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 12:59:10 PMIf not then they will face the consequences of their dishonesty and i am prepared to intimidate them and do all sorts of things to make sure they pay up and i find one way in particular is to relentlessly hassle them and to call them up repeatedly and even go and see them at home and that type of thing.

Am I to assume that repeat business is not a major concern for you?

Cheers

Jim

I dont want any repeat business from anyone who isnt prepared to pay up within a reasonable time and who isnt prepared to be honest and straightforward.

You make it sound like i am in the wrong here where all i want is to do the work to the best of my abilities so that everything is 100 percent and be paid for it promptly and without any nonsense.

Its not alright for the client to take liberties any more than its alright for myself to offer substandard work expecting to be paid for it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 08 January, 2011, 02:24:57 PM
...Minor impedimentally, I'm 40 today. I'm taking the extremely grown up view of seeing it as a very very good excuse for a massive piss up.

I think I may go a watch Horsham play this afternoon and start the alchohol abuse early. Anything to shake the creeping dread of my own mortality.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 08 January, 2011, 02:26:01 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 02:09:55 PM
You make it sound like i am in the wrong here where all i want is to do the work to the best of my abilities so that everything is 100 percent and be paid for it promptly and without any nonsense.

As is your right.

My work is drawn from a very small pool of potential employers, so repeat business is essential to me. It's as important to me that I know I have more work coming as it is to get paid for the jobs currently undertaken, so I have to be very diplomatic when undertaking credit control. Doubly so when you consider that editors from different publishers talk to each other, and often move between companies. A reputation -- deserved or not -- for being "difficult" will follow you around and prove very hard to shake.

Your business can clearly survive a rather more robust attitude to payment than mine, which would be eviscerated if I did much more than issue intermittent polite reminders that occasionally border on the reproachful!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 02:28:17 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 08 January, 2011, 02:24:57 PM
I think I may go a watch Horsham play this afternoon

Haven't we made it cleat that your kind aren't welcome here?

Happy birthday Kerrin, a mature approach!  

(My own 40th looms this year and I'm starting to wish I'd just gone to Carousel when the time came).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 08 January, 2011, 02:34:16 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 02:28:17 PM(My own 40th looms this year and I'm starting to wish I'd just gone to Carousel when the time came).


I'm too busy drokking Jenny Agutter to care.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 03:03:37 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 08 January, 2011, 02:26:01 PM
My work is drawn from a very small pool of potential employers, so repeat business is essential to me. It's as important to me that I know I have more work coming as it is to get paid for the jobs currently undertaken, so I have to be very diplomatic when undertaking credit control.
....
Your business can clearly survive a rather more robust attitude to payment than mine, which would be eviscerated if I did much more than issue intermittent polite reminders that occasionally border on the reproachful!

This is the balancing act alright.  Extending payment deadlines for those clients you believe to be worthwhile, jumping on those you believe are about to screw you, without getting yourself a bad reputation.  Unfortunately it's now become impossible to make effective judgements - decent reliable clients of many years standing can be screwed by their own clients or banks and unable to pay, and because you trust them you're more likely to have let them run up substantial bills.  One of my better clients, who is in partnership with my best client,  has owed me €40K for a year now, with gentle but firm and persistent nudging from me, meaning I've owed my bank that sum, and they are not as... forgiving as I am.  Now I have to get that money back or go under forthwith, but how to do it without scuppering a huge chunk of my future business.  Jeebus even talking about it gives me a headache.

 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 08 January, 2011, 03:31:30 PM
On the subject of running a business I prefer working on the premises of other companies, getting paid by the hour rather than being paid one sum for a complete project to do from home. If the company I am working for or their clients piss about then I get paid to be on their premises while they piss about.

Got my fingers burnt enough times in the past. Not saying I have learnt my lessons but at least I feel I did good in going against my nature recently in turning down some work which would have drained my time and energy. I told one of these guys that they should just go direct to their printer. 

Oh, and happy day of birth Kerrin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 January, 2011, 04:31:22 PM
We had a meeting today and out site manager told us he has been put on a redundancy notice of 90 days. We were supposed to be due a pay increase but this news seems to have given them another 3 months play. To top it all they have lost a major contract to Virgin Media up at Teeside. With no new contracts signed yet on other sites the future looks bleak for our employers.
The only good thing is that if a new company gets the contract for Leicester we will be shoehorned into that company.
TBH it would be their own fault for the way they treat us.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 04:45:39 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 08 January, 2011, 02:26:01 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 08 January, 2011, 02:09:55 PM
You make it sound like i am in the wrong here where all i want is to do the work to the best of my abilities so that everything is 100 percent and be paid for it promptly and without any nonsense.

As is your right.

My work is drawn from a very small pool of potential employers, so repeat business is essential to me. It's as important to me that I know I have more work coming as it is to get paid for the jobs currently undertaken, so I have to be very diplomatic when undertaking credit control. Doubly so when you consider that editors from different publishers talk to each other, and often move between companies. A reputation -- deserved or not -- for being "difficult" will follow you around and prove very hard to shake.

Your business can clearly survive a rather more robust attitude to payment than mine, which would be eviscerated if I did much more than issue intermittent polite reminders that occasionally border on the reproachful!

Cheers

Jim

I totally understand your point and your situation but mine is not quite the same and what i am talking about is only something i would consider in certain situations only but there are those types of people around [especially here] who will try it on and it would make me see red if someone was clearly trying to avoid paying for no good reason.As for what i am like i dont even like owing someone a fiver if its outstanding for any length of time.

I had to pay my scaffolder in full recently after only 1 week of the scaffolder providing the service after he called me up saying he couldnt wait any longer for it so i paid up in full because quite honestly i dont like the stress caused by owing money to anyone and having them breathing down my neck day after day.I like to have a clean conscience with no worries and no stress.

Thankfully it hasnt been necessary as everyone i have done work for lately have been absolutely fine.As for what i was talking about i wouldnt go for that course of action without giving it some serious thought first and it is a last resort and its only something i would consider if the client is dodgy.

All i am saying is i have my limits and i will never let it go.My dad is just the same and in some ways he is worse than i am and even more militant about it than i am and he is always asking if i am having any problems with being paid.

Quote from: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 03:03:37 PM


This is the balancing act alright.  Extending payment deadlines for those clients you believe to be worthwhile, jumping on those you believe are about to screw you, without getting yourself a bad reputation.  Unfortunately it's now become impossible to make effective judgements - decent reliable clients of many years standing can be screwed by their own clients or banks and unable to pay, and because you trust them you're more likely to have let them run up substantial bills.  One of my better clients, who is in partnership with my best client,  has owed me €40K for a year now, with gentle but firm and persistent nudging from me, meaning I've owed my bank that sum, and they are not as... forgiving as I am.  Now I have to get that money back or go under forthwith, but how to do it without scuppering a huge chunk of my future business.  Jeebus even talking about it gives me a headache.

 

I understand that as well as its a chain where one thing affects another etc but ultimately their financial problems which are not your problem create financial problems for yourself so its a difficult situation and they might be your best clients but they will only be your best clients when they finally pay you.

How forgiving and understanding and patient are you expected to be ?

Anyway i sincerely hope you can resolve it amicably.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 08 January, 2011, 06:37:38 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 07 January, 2011, 07:17:08 AM
I'm 30 today :(

I'm sure 30 isn't actually that old, but I'm a bit of a miserable sod by default so cue lots of soul searching!
On the bright side, you're a lot younger than you look! Oh, that's not right. I mean, er... Happy birthday.  :D

You were born on the same day as my pal Siobhan. What are the chances of that, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 January, 2011, 07:50:12 PM
I was due to go swimming with the wife, kids and a bunch of the other mums from my daughter's school but I showed a little bit too much enthusiasm when the wife mentioned the name of a certain milftastic mummy who would also be going.
I am now banned from the event  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 09 January, 2011, 08:48:27 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 08 January, 2011, 06:37:38 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 07 January, 2011, 07:17:08 AM
I'm 30 today :(

I'm sure 30 isn't actually that old, but I'm a bit of a miserable sod by default so cue lots of soul searching!
On the bright side, you're a lot younger than you look! Oh, that's not right. I mean, er... Happy birthday.  :D

You were born on the same day as my pal Siobhan. What are the chances of that, eh?

Cheers Cosh! And happy birthday Kerrin, hope you had a good one!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 January, 2011, 11:43:46 AM
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 08 January, 2011, 02:34:16 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 January, 2011, 02:28:17 PM(My own 40th looms this year and I'm starting to wish I'd just gone to Carousel when the time came).


I'm too busy drokking Jenny Agutter to care.

rohypnol's a wonderful thing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 09 January, 2011, 12:27:08 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 08 January, 2011, 07:50:12 PM
I was due to go swimming with the wife, kids and a bunch of the other mums from my daughter's school but I showed a little bit too much enthusiasm when the wife mentioned the name of a certain milftastic mummy who would also be going.
I am now banned from the event  :(.

Disaster! :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DrRocka on 09 January, 2011, 12:55:59 PM
I got called a bitch on the IMDB dredd forum.
Which upset me immensely.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 09 January, 2011, 01:21:14 PM
Don't sweat it, it's not much of a "forum".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 09 January, 2011, 01:22:21 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 09 January, 2011, 11:43:46 AM
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 08 January, 2011, 02:34:16 PM

I'm too busy drokking Jenny Agutter to care.

rohypnol's a wonderful thing!


No need when you're bangin' a 70's broad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 January, 2011, 01:44:43 PM
yes,but do you know what shes been putting in your tea? :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 January, 2011, 02:00:26 PM
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 09 January, 2011, 01:22:21 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 09 January, 2011, 11:43:46 AM
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 08 January, 2011, 02:34:16 PM

I'm too busy drokking Jenny Agutter to care.

rohypnol's a wonderful thing!


No need when you're bangin' a 70's broad.

As I understand it, all that's required is to say "let's have sex".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 09 January, 2011, 05:11:43 PM
I quite like footie.  I often have the final scores on or Match of The Day in the background because the gossiping and bitching makes me laugh. I will also often have a match on in the background as the crowd roar sends me off to sleep - it's like the sea..

I 'support' Grimsby Town - they are so rubbish that their own fans seriously take the mick out of them.

My minor impediment of the last few months is probably trying to find a decent pair of in-ear headphones*. For some reason everyone is putting bigger housings on them so no matter what size ear bud you try they fall out of my ears. I have wasted a lot of money trying to find a comfortable replacement (because you have to destroy the packaging in order to get them out and try them on) and given up and have some old fashioned headphones (which the websites call 'DJ style' on the way.

* I used to love them because they blocked the sounds of my fellow commuters on their bloody phones without leaking too much/any noise to annoy them in return.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 January, 2011, 09:16:38 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 09 January, 2011, 05:11:43 PM
My minor impediment of the last few months is probably trying to find a decent pair of in-ear headphones*. For some reason everyone is putting bigger housings on them so no matter what size ear bud you try they fall out of my ears. I have wasted a lot of money trying to find a comfortable replacement (because you have to destroy the packaging in order to get them out and try them on) and given up and have some old fashioned headphones (which the websites call 'DJ style' on the way.

The only kind I've ever found that are comfortable, non-leaky and compact are these philips (http://www.chsinteractive.co.uk/view_product.html?product=151240?utm_source=froogle&utm_medium=ppc&utm_term=151240&utm_campaign=froogle) ones, but I think they may be discontinued as they are becoming increasingly difficult to find - the price quoted on that link is much more than they used to be in Dixons/Currys - about £19.99 I think. They've got soft detachable rubber ends (3 sizes) and ear hooks so they don't fall out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 January, 2011, 10:19:10 PM
...because, after tomorrow morning, im not going to see my wife until Wednesday teatime. She's up in that London all day tomorrow, teaching, then doing a show, staying overnight. She comes back after i go to work on Tuesday- and i dont get home til 3 on Wednesday, when she will be out at a meeting about a number of shows she's putting on in Hastings and London.
On the plus side, after she goes tomorrow, i have seven whole hours to myself- which is the longest 'me-time' i've had in seven years- thanks to afterschool film club.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 09 January, 2011, 10:30:17 PM
QuoteThe only kind I've ever found that are comfortable, non-leaky and compact are these philips ones, but I think they may be discontinued as they are becoming increasingly difficult to find - the price quoted on that link is much more than they used to be in Dixons/Currys - about £19.99 I think. They've got soft detachable rubber ends (3 sizes) and ear hooks so they don't fall out.

I use Sennheiser CX300 ear canal headphones - they are a bit pricey on the high street so order them online if you can. They also come with three different sized 'bungs' or whatever they're called so they should fit. Searched for years for headphones that wouldn't fall out every five minutes and these ones are great.

One thing about them, though is (and apologies if this is a bit disgusting) the meshes inside the earbuds tend to get gunked up with earwax from time to time, to the extent that I eventually had to cut them out with a scalpel - they've worked perfectly ever since, though.

Oh, and as I learned, counterfeit headphones are a big problem and it can be hard to guarantee that you are buying the real deal (avoid eBay!) - think I got my (genuine) ones from Play.com for about £20.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 January, 2011, 12:31:41 PM
Quote from: radiator on 09 January, 2011, 10:30:17 PM
They also come with three different sized 'bungs' or whatever they're called so they should fit.

After constantly losing one when carrying my headphones around in my pocket wrapped round my I-pod, I've taken to selecting the best size and supergluing them on to the actual earphone! And you must have very productive ears if it's getting right in to bung up the mesh - I find any small bits in there can usually be removed with a toothpick
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 January, 2011, 12:38:28 PM
Quote from: radiator on 09 January, 2011, 10:30:17 PM
They also come with three different sized 'bungs' or whatever they're called so they should fit.

After constantly losing one when carrying my headphones around in my pocket wrapped round my I-pod, I've taken to selecting the best size and supergluing them on to the actual earphone! And you must have very productive ears if it's getting right in to bung up the mesh - I find any small bits of earwax in there can usually be removed with a toothpick
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 January, 2011, 01:33:27 PM
Well if no-one else is going to suggest cheese...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 January, 2011, 02:15:26 PM
oops - hit quote isntead of edit there!  :-[
Not sure why I felt the need to Edit in the word "earwax" - as if there could be anything else gunking up his... err.. let's just leave it there shall we?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 January, 2011, 03:29:54 PM
Had a bloke knock on the door to read the gas & electricity today at about 10:00, the thing is I was asleep (I've not been able to get back to sleep yet).
I told him that I had sent the readings off last week and that the electricity one was buggered and that they are coming out to sort it out on the 21st. I also reminded him that I keep telling every twat that comes to the door that I work frigging nights and I've also told every twat to come after 16:00 and then I'll let them in (none have ever returned to read the numbers). They all tap this info into their handheld device but obviously they can't be arsed to follow this advice, as they keep coming in the bloody morning.

No stranger will go down that cellar without me (Carolyn has been told) as I treat everyone as a potential perp (not counting Judge Palmer in that, as he was the perfect guest and obviously not a stranger).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 10 January, 2011, 06:00:05 PM
Went to see 127 Hours last night. Good film but throughout there was clearly some sort of problem with the cinema speakers which made the treble distort and sound all wonky during the music - an effect that sounded like someone playing with the 'pitch bend' dial on a keyboard. It obviously wasn't intentional as it happened during the trailers too.

Though it wasn't initially irritating enough to warrant complaining about, it did somewhat spoil the last five minutes of the movie - [spoiler]a very intense and moving sequence with no dialogue, only music[/spoiler] - so much so that we decided to complain to the staff (and maybe get some compensation for the whopping £16.70 we spent on two tickets).

After waiting for 15 minutes, we got to see the manager, who dismissed our complaints outright, smugly telling us that "the projectionist" said there was no problem, they had received no complaints (my suggestion that they had TWO complaints - me and my girlfriend - fell on deaf ears) and most patronisingly, that we "must have heard it wrong".

Bollocks to Odeon - you would think that these days where it is so easy to see films elsewhere they would treat their customers a bit better than that. I can actually envisage a time where all the big multiplexes close down due to piracy/home cinemas and the only remaining cinemas are small, serve a sophisticated clientele, and are run by dedicated people who know what they're doing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 10 January, 2011, 06:58:18 PM
Companies have perfected methods to take our money swiftly but screw the customer regarding when they get what they paid for.

I bought some software off Amazon. According to their tracking info I should've received it Wednesday. I didn't see any daylight for Wednesday and Thursday while I waited for the package. Saturday I had a delivery note – while I was in. I'm not convinced the postman actually rang our buzzer so I lost an hour or so to go to the local sorting office but at least I got my package. So what the hell is the point of those tracking numbers and delivery dates?

Saturday my Mrs and me ordered new mobiles. We both had text messages saying the phones would arrive Tuesday, then messages saying today. Delivery had to be at another address – my Mrs is the account holder and she never updated her bank details (long story) so I was hanging around where we used to live from 8-11am until someone else came in. The tracking numbers are not recognised by the delivery company website. After a few back and forth phone calls it turns out the phone company hasn't even despatched the mobiles to the courier company. So why give us the damn tracking numbers and bullcrap delivery date?

The only (minor) consolation is that as I am not doing paid work right now, I haven't lost three days income to hang around for nothing. We ordered the mobiles by phone as that was cheaper than the high street but that could have proved very costly if I was working.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 January, 2011, 10:51:23 PM
Radiator, Complain on line and via written letter. This normally does the trick when the wife complains. Go back and get the manager and the attendants name.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 13 January, 2011, 06:38:45 PM
I've just got my new headphones and they are lovely ( http://www.amazon.co.uk/Philips-SHO8801-10-Headband-Headphones/dp/B003YFIU50/ref=pd_sxp_grid_pt_0_2 )

However, I'm not sure the sound doesn't leak a bit too much. I don't like annoying people on the train especially given my tastes in music.  I might well buy another pair for travelling in the future and will follow up on your recommendations then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 13 January, 2011, 06:40:37 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 January, 2011, 10:51:23 PM
Radiator, Complain on line and via written letter. This normally does the trick when the wife complains. Go back and get the manager and the attendants name.





V

Yup. I find asking the manager for his name at the time sometimes does the trick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 13 January, 2011, 06:45:44 PM
We got the manager's name (which he happily told us with a big fat grin on his face) - tbh it was his attitiude that pissed us off more than the sound issue - he basically all but accused us of lying to try and blag some free tickets rather than actually investigating the problem himself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 15 January, 2011, 07:13:04 PM
This is boring:


I have had a nightmare of a time trying to buy a diamond tipped drillbit today .

Tool shops dont seem to have heard of them.1 shop recommended a tungsten tipped drill bit saying it was just as good as diamond tipped when its not and then telling me i have to use the hammer action on the drill when thats exactly what i am trying to avoid in this instance.I asked a simple question about the difference between the drill bits they sold and he couldnt answer my questions despite him saying in condescending know it all way "I have been in this job 25 years".So i pointed out he couldnt answer my very simple questions and then pointed out that he doesnt know very much about drilling.

I didnt like his manner at all and his wearisome tone of voice unless its because he is tired of listening to his crap because i was tired of listening to it after 5 minutes.

I want to drill a series of holes through cement based render with NO hammer action and this is using the principle that the drill is spinning round and round at very high speed while cutting through the material i am drilling into. Its as if this something unusual  :o

I finally found what i want online which is just as well as i wasbecoming exasperated with it all as the entire day has been wasted.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 16 January, 2011, 09:24:40 AM
Diamond tip is your best option. Lasts longer but you already knew that.
The crap our company use are Hilti reconditioned rubbish. A couple of engineering brick drill outs and the tip is blunt and burnt out. On a blunt tip it is a 20 minute slog for one hole. Unless you want a blow out the size of a fist and a back charge. But I have my trusty brick dye to cover said inconveniences.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 16 January, 2011, 12:58:14 PM
So, my Facebook profile seems to have locked itself/ vanished from the face of the earth. Can't log into it, won't send me a password re-set email. There doesn't seem to be any way to get help with it either, as all I recieved on back from them was an email saying they can't help with individual accounts.Can I really be arsed to set up another? Twats. >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 16 January, 2011, 01:52:33 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 16 January, 2011, 09:24:40 AM
Diamond tip is your best option. Lasts longer but you already knew that.
The crap our company use are Hilti reconditioned rubbish. A couple of engineering brick drill outs and the tip is blunt and burnt out. On a blunt tip it is a 20 minute slog for one hole. Unless you want a blow out the size of a fist and a back charge. But I have my trusty brick dye to cover said inconveniences.




V

I always use diamond cutting discs as they are far moreeffective at cutting and go on and on and on instead of those throwaway black discs that last a few minutes.

I also dont know how you can be expected to drill through hard fired bricks like engineering bricks which just results in stressing out the drill and burning out drill bits that are unsuitable which is a complete waste.

I have to drill a minimum of 25 holes as i am doing a repair that involves drilling holes and then inserting metal rod with resin to stitch together a large crack in section of architectural moulding.This is why i cant use hammer action and i want every hole drilled in a day and no more.

I knew this was going to happen as i had a bad feeling about it but you cant do the job unless you have the right tools.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 16 January, 2011, 07:59:18 PM
Spam deleted. Spammer reported for banning. My goodness, that took a lot of effort.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 January, 2011, 09:43:11 PM
And we all appreciate it.

Now, if you could just arrange to have the Prince Caspian movie deleted from this reality I'd be able to get some of my evening back.  There's a romantic sub-plot it it, FFS.  A romantic subplot.  
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 16 January, 2011, 10:07:17 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 16 January, 2011, 09:43:11 PM
And we all appreciate it.

Now, if you could just arrange to have the Prince Caspian movie deleted from this reality I'd be able to get some of my evening back.  There's a romantic sub-plot it it, FFS.  A romantic subplot.  

I'm working on it but it keeps popping up, like sweetcorn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 16 January, 2011, 10:16:06 PM
HOW DARE THESE HOLLYWOOD SHYLOCKS SULLY THE PURITY OF THESE CHILDRENS YES YOU HEARD ME CHILDRENS STORIES WITH THESE GROTESQUE INTIMIAMATIONS OF WHAT PASSES FOR INTIMACY IN THIS MOST DEBASED OF EPOCHS IF I WANTED TO SEE SOME OF THE STUFF THAT THEY WANT TO SHOVE DOWN MY THROAT I WOULD GO AND WATCH BEING BAD OR WHATEVER THAT SHOW IS CALLED I TELL YOU AMC USED TO BE SUCH A NICE NETWORK NOW I SEE THEM PUTTING ALL KINDS OF RELATIVEIST GARBAGE INTO OUR LIVING ROOMS WHERE WILL IT ALL END I ASK YOU
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 16 January, 2011, 10:47:35 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 16 January, 2011, 10:16:06 PM
...WHERE WILL IT ALL END I ASK YOU



when you come.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 January, 2011, 02:57:32 PM
I havent seen Cat since 11.30pm last night when i let him out.I checked outside in the early hours of this morning when it was pissing with rain and he was not there and i have not seen him today either.

If he isnt in next door which he might be then i am thinking of and prepared for the worst.Next door may not be aware something is up as she probably presumed Cat was with me as she was away last night and she got back at about 7am this morning.

I dont say this without good reason as i know his movements and his habits very well.He is quite a streetwise Cat and is not the type to follow people or go in their houses but Cats do get stuck in places and there are always notices up for missing cats.

This post might be a bit previous but i will know for sure in a couple of hours or so when next door gets back from work but in the meantime its a serious worry and i have a bad feeling about it which i have NOT had before.

Cat is my little friend and i will be angry and pissed off and depressed if my worst fears turn out to be correct.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 17 January, 2011, 03:16:23 PM
I hope your little friend turns up safe & sound. We're having trouble with our cat, Puck, ourselves. Last week he was acting strange - sort of depressed & he wouldn't eat. We took him to the vet & after checking him out, he reckoned he was a bit traumatised after having a fight with a local fox. He gave him an shot of anti-biotics & some pills that he has to have two of each day this week. Problem is, the only way to get him to take the said pills (unless you want to lose a couple of fingers) is to crush them up in his food - which he isn't really eating. Catch-22.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 January, 2011, 03:29:00 PM
Cats are very resourceful ctreatures. Although he may not make a habit of going in other people's houses, "any port in a storm" as they say. Once there, he may be milking his rescuers' hospitality for all it's worth, or hasn't been let back out again. Or he could have just wandered farther than usual looking for a dry spot to shelter from the wet. Don't get too worried just yet.

I once knew of a cat round here who had two blissfully unaware familes convinced that they were its sole owners for many months, shuttling between the two flats, eating two dinners a day etc. It caused a big argument when it came out, but I never found out which one actually claimed it in the end!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 January, 2011, 04:01:44 PM
There's nothing worse than a cat of regular habits - as soon as you notice he's not where he should be when he should be your heart leaps into your mouth and stays there.  That said, most of my many cats have done this to me at one time or another, and only one has ever stayed gone (touch wood).  Hope your friend is just pissing you about, and presents himself for punishment (i.e. extra food and attention) soon.  No harm in knocking on a few doors in the meantime.

On a happier note...

Quote from: Dandontdare on 17 January, 2011, 03:29:00 PM
I once knew of a cat round here who had two blissfully unaware familes convinced that they were its sole owners for many months, shuttling between the two flats, eating two dinners a day etc. It caused a big argument when it came out, but I never found out which one actually claimed it in the end!

For those who have relations of a tender age, there's a terrific picture book with a variation on this plot called Tiddles, Arthur and Puss by Judith Kerr, the wife of St. Nigel Kneale,  (also of The Tiger Who Came to Tea fame, which gave li'l me more nightmares than any other piece of fiction before or since - the tiger drinks the taps dry, FFS).  She's one of those authors who gives each character dialogue that it's impossible not to read aloud in a distinctive voice, which I always find very clever, and handy for sleepy narrators.






Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 17 January, 2011, 05:40:09 PM
Cat has shown up so its all alright .

I have never been so glad to be wrong.Thanks for the comments and apologies for wating your time and jumping to conclusions.


Quote from: exilewood on 17 January, 2011, 03:16:23 PM
. Problem is, the only way to get him to take the said pills (unless you want to lose a couple of fingers) is to crush them up in his food - which he isn't really eating. Catch-22.

There is a way to get a Cat to swallow a pill but its not very easy if you dont know how to do it or you are inexperienced so have a word with the vet about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 January, 2011, 06:52:40 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 17 January, 2011, 05:40:09 PM
Cat has shown up so its all alright .

That's the Mayor and Cat Wolf saved from certain doom in one day!  Hurrah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 17 January, 2011, 06:55:30 PM
QuoteCat has shown up so its all alright .

I have never been so glad to be wrong.Thanks for the comments and apologies for wating your time and jumping to conclusions.

And i bet none the wiser of your worries  pleased the cats back safe and sound :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 January, 2011, 09:24:59 PM
Jon Hamm as Superman? NUH-UH.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 18 January, 2011, 02:41:30 AM
just took my Kitty in to have the snip and unfortunatly with him being a bit of a mutant (no tail) they only found 1 ball!  they then had to open up his abdomen and search so what was going to be a nice easy bill of $120 suddenlt became $470.  And now the little bastard sloths around giving me the evils not realising how much i just spent on him (i suppose having your sole drive for life removed so suddenly would make you a bit sad).  At least he doesn't have a swipe at everone and everything that walks past and spend all night terrorising the neighbourhood now, it was getting out of controll i'd never met such an agressive cat.

CU Radbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 18 January, 2011, 07:43:54 AM
Wow, must have been a ULTRABOLLOCK. No wonder the furry little terror is pissed off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 18 January, 2011, 01:50:58 PM
I just had to pay a spark £270 so I can rest easy that my house is in fact NOT going to burst into flames while I sleep.

I was also unexpectedly punched in the face on Sunday by a Ned but think I'm more aggrieved at the £270.00.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 18 January, 2011, 02:24:22 PM
Has the ned regained consciousness yet? :)
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 18 January, 2011, 03:05:01 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 18 January, 2011, 02:24:22 PM
Has the ned regained consciousness yet? :)

That's the worst of it as I had my 2 year old son with me so couldn't really start scrapping in the street.

Still, £270 eh. I could've used that for much more fun stuff than a new fuse box and bit of wiring!
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 18 January, 2011, 03:11:28 PM
Bad news. Hope the little Satanist wasn't too distressed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 18 January, 2011, 03:30:22 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 16 January, 2011, 12:58:14 PM
So, my Facebook profile seems to have locked itself/ vanished from the face of the earth. Can't log into it, won't send me a password re-set email. There doesn't seem to be any way to get help with it either, as all I recieved on back from them was an email saying they can't help with individual accounts.Can I really be arsed to set up another? Twats. >:(

Hi Darren. Remember when I told you where to get the 'use white as transparent' in the drop down menu, in the Manga Debut? Could you help me refind it? Mine has gone missing.
:-[ That would be great, if you can help.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 18 January, 2011, 04:16:36 PM
On the subject of sports--(that we are no longer talking about, but anyway.)

http://store.theonion.com/product/the-sports-team-from-my-area-is-superior-to,39/

t-shirt
(http://media.avclub.com/images/products/productgroup/39/M-SportsTeamFromMy_400x400_2_jpg_400x400_upscale_q85.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 January, 2011, 10:26:01 PM
She left a white plastic chopping board and a saucepan on top of the grill and she knew we were having sausages for tea. I didn't see the chopping board because it's white and so is the cooker hood. The chopping board melted and I had to peel it off. It's destroyed, and the cooker had melted plastic on it. I went into a man sulk, thinking that everything was ruined, except the dinner, which was great, thanks, especially the mashed potato. After dinner she scraped all the melted plastic off the cooker and throughoughly scrubbed it so it looks like second-hand-new. She really is marvellous.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 January, 2011, 10:28:01 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 18 January, 2011, 10:26:01 PM
She really is marvellous.

Infuriating, isn't it?  I'm off tomorrow at 4am for a few days for a job out west, and I come home late to find that not only are my kids collected, homeworked, bathed and asleep, but there's a nice dinner in the oven, my bag is packed, there's packed breakfast and lunch made, and she's even charged my spare camera batteries.  Oh, and she's been at work all day earning money to pay for my petrol.  Madness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 18 January, 2011, 10:28:57 PM
And that, my friends - is poetry
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 January, 2011, 10:57:11 PM
All those people who doubted we would have flying cars and robot servants in the future are proved wrong. Alright, I'll concede the flying cars thing, but I'm sure they're working on that.


What?  :-X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 18 January, 2011, 10:58:36 PM
I wear silver jump-suits on a daily basis. If that's any help.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 18 January, 2011, 11:30:03 PM
2 and a half hours I've been working on my trophy guide for Transformers War For Cybertron and I thort you know what I'm going to save it before anything happens I get my mouse over the button to save it and then get a power cut loosing the last 2 and a half hours work ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 19 January, 2011, 12:17:21 AM
Does no-one care about by beautiful, little cat. He's been my constant companion for nearly 13 years. What can I do? It's breaking my heart.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 January, 2011, 12:50:09 PM
My left pit is flaring up again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 19 January, 2011, 04:15:57 PM
Quote from: exilewood on 19 January, 2011, 12:17:21 AM
Does no-one care about by beautiful, little cat. He's been my constant companion for nearly 13 years. What can I do? It's breaking my heart.

I care which is why i suggested having a word with the vet.He might not need the medication anyway which would save a lot of bother.

Little Sweetie.I hope he recovers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 19 January, 2011, 04:19:26 PM
You can get these plastic things like icing tubes for pills that stuffs the pill down the throat... *googles* a cat pill popper. Doesn't seem to be too expensive...

http://www.ehow.com/video_2259731_use-pill-popper-give-cat.html

Other than that it's bribery and threats....

I hope your cat recovers anyhow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 20 January, 2011, 09:26:59 AM
...because I have the dreaded lurghi. Also because my eldest son has the dreaded lurghi, my youngest son has just got over the dreaded lurghi and has gone to school, but is complaining of painful legs, and my wife is showing signs of having the dreaded lurghi.

And I have three Lates to work over the next four days.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 January, 2011, 09:37:40 AM
We have a neighbour's cat who spends most of his time here. With their permission, we have taken to feeding him twice a day. We're moving house in the next couple of weeks and will miss him terribly.

Is it against social etiquette to offer to buy the cat...?

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 20 January, 2011, 11:12:43 AM
My girlfreinds family 'lost ' a cat to a neighbour in this way- the other family took to feeding it and looking after it and the cat seemed happy to ohave been adopted. The new family had kids who loved it so everyone was happy


Then, on the day my girlfriend's family were moving house the cat sensed what was up and jumped into the car and refused to get out- breaking the hearts of her adoptive family in the process


They're shitheads like that
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 20 January, 2011, 02:04:52 PM
See if you feed someone elses cat, you're scum! ;) Well, not really, but...

My own cat has got into hella scrapes because of a serial feeder. She feeds cats, any cats, even ones with collars and that are obviously in good health and being looked after. She then becomes the cat's sole feeder and they hang around her yard, so to all intents and purposes they become her cats, but she doesn't actually care for the things beyond food. This is how she got The Bad Cat (once belonged to a neighbour), who has obviously never been neutered and is agressive as fuck about other ones getting at some grub or, like, walking about and stuff. This has led to a few minor and a few major vet bills - one time my cat was missing for weeks and was literally nearly dead from a septic abcess before I found out where it was - two weeks of vets bills for Mikey followed. I'd been round looking for the fuckin thing too and she said nothing!

She's also a fuckin nutter - my problem is she's an 'aule doll' so for the life of me I can't really be aggressive enough, although I think I've finally put her off feeding ours. I told her I'd make her pay the vet & insurance bills we've had over it.

Anyway - that's probably enough on the cats for now!

(Jonesey's fine nowadays, if you were wondering)

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 20 January, 2011, 04:28:37 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 20 January, 2011, 02:04:52 PM
My own cat has got into hella scrapes because of a serial feeder. She feeds cats, any cats, even ones with collars and that are obviously in good health and being looked after. She then becomes the cat's sole feeder and they hang around her yard..

Wait... your cat has been feeding other cats?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 January, 2011, 05:24:48 PM
Virgin Media.

I had a letter from Virgin Media who were obviously desperate for the 12.47 that i owed them demanding that i pay them immediately so late last night i paid the bill and this morning i found my services had been restricted despite having paid them.

Now this time it wasnt a major problem as i have been out all day but this is not the first time this has happened and last time they did this i got on the dog and bone and had a word with them about it and said that i was unwilling to wait 12 hours for my services to be de-restricted so i was connected back instantly.

For 2 whole days i have been drilling with a water fed drill upwards into masonry which meant holding a very heavy drill with a diamond drill in position while it drills the holes very slowly.Thats not something i want to do again ever.It must have weighed 30 pounds.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 20 January, 2011, 07:20:34 PM
Today, in my illness-fogged state, i became somewhat concerned about a package that a forum denizen had posted to me earlier this month. On a whim i went to the front door and rooted through the pile of junkmail that we leave there to recreate that autumnal walking-through-leaves feeling we love so much.
And there it was: the loathsome red slip. Dated the 13th.
Arseholes.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 26 January, 2011, 01:56:14 PM
Bah, our new college timetable only has one class on a monday, and we were asked as a class if we wanted to have it at 9am-11am to get it out of the way. Unanimously the lazy arsepieces that make up my class insisted it was better to have it 11.30am-1.30pm, as getting up on a Monday morning is apparently nigh on impossible for them. Because I need to be in town for 5pm to start work it's barely worthwhile me going home, so I'll now need to kill 3 hours in town every monday.

Basically an entire day has been torpedoed just so these lazy fuckwits can have an extra couple of hours in bed. VENT.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 January, 2011, 02:09:03 PM
That's outrageous. Just shows it's a mistake to make education a consumer good and turn students into customers. Students should just be on the receiving end and accept what they are given. It's the only way to maintain standards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 January, 2011, 02:59:39 PM
SIX WEEKS to upgrade our company bank account to take credit card payments. SIX WEEKS!!!

Grrr.....
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 26 January, 2011, 03:31:12 PM
Some fucker's used my card details to spend £150 on itunes, and both my bank and Apple are reluctant to make the first move in investigating. Looks like I'll have to wait until I get home from work before unleashing some righteous fury on both of 'em...
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 January, 2011, 04:08:33 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 26 January, 2011, 03:31:12 PM
Some fucker's used my card details to spend £150 on itunes...

Has been happening quite a bit apparently (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/01/25/itunes_gifting_scam/)...

M@
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 26 January, 2011, 05:14:32 PM
Thanks Matt. Very handy to know.
Just arrived home and about to make some waves...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 26 January, 2011, 05:26:13 PM
Gah! I totally forgot - I uninstalled itunes several weeks ago, after my ipod broke. Didn't see the point in having it cluttering up my PC until I'd got the thing fixed (possibly months away, at this rate!). I'm now having to reinstall itunes just so I can check my purchase history prior to going on the warpath. And it's taking ages...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 27 January, 2011, 09:43:14 PM
I have a whitlow on my finger and a giant chilblain across the back of my thumb...on the same hand. Everything I try to do hurts like hell!  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 28 January, 2011, 12:04:25 AM
They got another cat and I wasn't consulted.

Also I deodorized myself using Adidas Ice Dive. Bad things that have happened before, happened again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 28 January, 2011, 10:01:15 PM
you're not supposed to spray down there just soap and water my boy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 January, 2011, 04:46:46 PM
Why does everything my Mother cooks give me chronic flatulence?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 January, 2011, 05:18:29 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 29 January, 2011, 04:46:46 PM
Why does everything my Mother cooks give me chronic flatulence?

be thankful you're not in Malawi (http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/wacky/illegal-farting-law-causes-big-stink/story-e6frev20-1225996614735). Cubes creep!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 January, 2011, 08:38:52 PM
The london sea life aquarium was fucking jammed with millions of people, but we did see big sharks, huge red bellied pirahnas, and a cuban crocodile, so the littlest guy was happy.
Then forbidden planet didnt have the books i wanted (mars life, garden of rama, starship troopers and foundation), so i had to make do with two from ben bova's 'grand tour' series. Small boys got loads of plastic tat though.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 30 January, 2011, 12:32:58 PM
I'm in work on a Sunday and my coffee is making a weird fizzing sound.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 January, 2011, 02:13:35 PM
It's a really beautiful day and I'm heading back into work to do battle with the office's trojan invasion.  Have all the PCs all clean as of last night (crosses fingers), only the backup discs to tackle now, but I hate leaving the kids for that sort of needless crap when there's exploring to be done!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 30 January, 2011, 11:57:06 PM
The ex has gone into labour today. My daughter gives me a phone call in a half panicked voice wanting to know what to put in the suit case. I gave the phone to the missus and drove straight round there to see what was going on.
The selfish bitch had gone round a friends house this morning then text my daughter 2 hours later letting her know that the contractions had started, leaving her to deal with the overnight bag whilst looking after her brother.
I calmed her down and waited for her uncle to turn up.
My cousin* (The husband/father of the unborn child) was still at work.

This was all after a long mornings drive from Leicester to Hoyland (Between Sheffield and Barnsley) and back to visit my sister in law and her week old baby which was a wonderful experience. They have waited so long for this baby.
I also scored this off her husband. He was about to E-BAY it.
(http://cf.geekdo-images.com/images/pic429183_t.jpg)


*Long story

V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 31 January, 2011, 01:19:45 PM
Needed to get some ID verified, so - abiding by a list of acceptable signatories - went to my Bank who refused, and then the Police, who also refused. Both locations had posters showing smiling employees happily serving members of their community.

Bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2011, 01:47:24 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 30 January, 2011, 11:57:06 PM
*Long story

At least two month's worth of plotlines for Eastenders, I'd say.

I particularly like the karmic rebalancing of a tasty Rogue game!

Over at my impediment store, the Trojans are in disarray, Priam and Hecuba have fallen to my sword, and the city is mine.  Only two backup discs left to cleanse and purify of deviant filth, and Helen will be back in our hands.  (This mish-mash of Homer and Mills is how I made it through the weekend's drudgery). Now, which way is Ithaca again?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 February, 2011, 04:29:38 PM
Because some fucker has signed me up for some group on facebook lamenting the fact that a pub and a club in hastings have just closed, and because i mostly access fb on my phone, i cant leave the sodding group. Ive now got a facebook full of bleatings about how sad people are that they've gone. I've been in the pub twice in my life, and hated it both times, and the club ive not been in for twenty years, and even when i did go regularly, between 1985 and 1989, it was always shit. For fuckssakes!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 01 February, 2011, 05:07:17 PM
I hate most of the groups people sign me up to on FB as well.
My minor impediment today is that I went out to catch up on the Invincible trades I haven't read yet, starting with volume 9. Went to Orbital and FP rather than order online as I was too impatient to wait. Guess which was the only volume both shops had sold out of?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 February, 2011, 08:14:55 PM
people can sign you up to groups without your consent? Jeez, that's crap.

Another reason why I'm glad I don't do FB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 February, 2011, 09:07:35 PM
Here's a minor impediment. I found myself agreeing with a Tory cost-cutting policy on education: namely that they want to reduce the number of secondary school teacher training places and scrap the maintenance bursary for everything but maths and science teaching*.

The reasons why I think this isn't anywhere near as evil as most Tory policies are:

1) there are already enough teachers for the time being
2) there are plenty of unemployed teachers because jobs are so scarce
3) by training up yet more teachers, we're denying jobs to people we've already spent money training who may never get their turn to teach
4) a lot of graduates go into teaching because they think they've got few career options, and for no better reason than that
5) most of the opponents of the cut are thinking in terms of students' employment prospects being harmed, but more training doesn't produce more jobs: it just keeps you busy and off the dole for another year
6) the taxpayer doesn't owe under-employed graduates a living
7) people tend to think, when things are good, that things were always the same; they forget that teachers had to pay for their own maintenance under the last Tory government anyway - it was only under Labour that they started funding teacher training properly again
8) there was no catastrophic shortage of teachers the last time the Tories kicked recruitment in the balls: a recruitment drive with incentives under Labour fixed the situation in time, just as the Tories are probably expecting will happen four years from now, unless the gaps are all plugged by the quarter of trainee teachers who graduated without jobs every year for the past several years.
9) lastly, when the Tories are cutting vital services left, right and centre, it doesn't make sense that they would lavish money on topping up the qualifications of graduates who had to borrow the costs of their undergraduate tuition in the first place!


* They're increasing primary school teacher training places at the same time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 01 February, 2011, 09:28:23 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 01 February, 2011, 08:14:55 PM
people can sign you up to groups without your consent? Jeez, that's crap.

Another reason why I'm glad I don't do FB.

you also apparently never leave as i deleted my account yet still recieved emails and freind requests click on the link im still there! i emailed facebook and told them to remove me from their server,they didnt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 02 February, 2011, 04:40:22 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 01 February, 2011, 04:29:38 PM
because i mostly access fb on my phone, i cant leave the sodding group.
You should still be able to access the full version of the site via a link at the bottom of the page on the mobile version and do anything you need to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 February, 2011, 07:14:08 PM
The battery is shagged on my laptop and where the power lead plugs in is a bit flaky.

I spent two hours this afternoon skilfully crafting a stunning work of fiction* entitled January 2011 Mileage Report, only to accidentally knock the laptop power lead out and lose the lot before I even had chance to save it.







*Although it was partly based on a true story.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 05 February, 2011, 11:48:33 PM
I'm anoyed as one of my favourite animas I have been watching for a year now has finished and now I've got to find something else's to watch on a weekly bases as the people I was downloading the series from aren't subbing the next one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 February, 2011, 12:35:16 AM
Girls are better than anime. Anime is what you fall back on if you don't get the girl.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 06 February, 2011, 12:51:37 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 05 February, 2011, 11:48:33 PM
I'm anoyed as one of my favourite animas I have been watching for a year now has finished and now I've got to find something else's to watch on a weekly bases as the people I was downloading the series from aren't subbing the next one.


Look for visual guides on how to woo women while wearing a Gundam suit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 06 February, 2011, 10:22:09 AM
Yesterday, I missed the Ireland match as I attended a self congratulatory wank fest, otherwise known as Lunch With The In-Laws.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 February, 2011, 05:22:08 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 06 February, 2011, 10:22:09 AM
a self congratulatory wank fest, otherwise known as Lunch With The In-Laws.

Oh I do hope not. Especially at the table!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 06 February, 2011, 08:30:20 PM
My in-laws can be so up themselves as well, especially the mother in-law.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 February, 2011, 09:14:48 PM
My own in-laws drive me to distraction (not least because of the deeply hurtful favouritism they endlessly display to their darling son as opposed to my wife), but I have a dear friend whose in-law troubles make mine seem entirely non-existant.  

To hear what my friend's husband's family come out with, you would swear their son had married a feral baby-eating smack-head from a mutated tribe of war-criminals, not the highly intelligent, witty, hard-working woman who manages to also be a published author and loving mother of their two grandchildren.  I'd take her reports with the usual pinch of salt one applies to one-sided domestic accounts, except that she can present the proof of this insanity - her in-laws enjoy sending her long intervention-style e-mails bullet-pointed with invented grievances and ultimata for their redress.   It's painful to watch the effect it has on her husband and herself, and the kids that don't know why their 'other' grandparents never send them birthday cards or come to visit.  Families, I ask you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 February, 2011, 11:18:33 PM
My in-laws are great. I mean the mother and step-father.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 08 February, 2011, 03:57:39 PM
The venue we were going to use for our album launch are now saying that due to noise complaints they probably can't let us play at full strength. Thought it was all sorted, now we need to find somewhere else and for the cost and size I thought we had the perfect deal there. The next possibility is way more expensive and we're trying to keep it a free entry night. Annoyance.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 February, 2011, 04:28:16 PM
-sigh-  A client has finally sent me half the additional tender info I asked for a week ago, 30 minutes before the submission deadline, and I now have to revise my tender with (still) a gigantic amount of guesswork and get it in by 5.  Then I have to drive through rush hour traffic to my night shift. 

Best get on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 08 February, 2011, 11:37:36 PM
I hear you, at work we have consultants constantly spec'ing oddball and  expensive material for government jobs, because they are in the pay of the manufacturers and distributors. When any problems or spares are needed, there is of course a two month wait and costs the earth.
Most of these fittings end up being replaced by off the shelf spurious material, that costs a quarter of the price, has the same compoments, and spares are easily available.
Anyway, works OK otherwise!

David 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 09 February, 2011, 09:47:38 AM
Got a flat tyre last night on the way home - I'd hit something lumpy on the road and discovered my flat a good few miles along, while overtaking a lorry at 70mph. This is the first time I've had to change the wheel on my own car - made all the more difficult in the dark side road I'd hobbled to, as I'd cleared my boot out of useful things, like my torch and hi vis jacket, to cart stuff to the tip last week end. The only person who stopped to offer help, by way of a torch, was a cyclist but I had it pretty much sorted by then.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 10 February, 2011, 09:52:38 PM
I bought a floating silicone cup for egg poaching. I tried it out. It's crap. It takes more than 20 minutes to poach an egg, and the yolk falls right out. Better off just cracking an egg into a frying pan of boiling water.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 February, 2011, 09:59:20 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 10 February, 2011, 09:52:38 PM
I bought a floating silicone cup for egg poaching. I tried it out. It's crap. It takes more than 20 minutes to poach an egg, and the yolk falls right out. Better off just cracking an egg into a frying pan of boiling water.

I bought a couple of those recently and I'm quite impressed. They do take a bit longer, but make perfect eggs. The trick is to rub the inside with a teeny bit of oil or butter so the egg white doesn't stick. The impressive thing about them is that they're so heat resistant you can lift them out of the boiling water with your fingers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 February, 2011, 10:05:43 PM
I find poaching an egg better in a sauce pan with deep boiling water, stir water then crack an egg into the eddy, leave to simmer for 5 to 10 mins for preference.
You could also place a sliver of cling film over a bowl, crack an egg into it, ball and tie off end, place into a saucepan of boiling water and simmer for 4 to 8 mins for pereference.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 11 February, 2011, 09:54:04 AM
Youre all phillistines. You need vinegar in the water to poach an egg.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 February, 2011, 10:39:26 AM
Delia Smith reckons the trick is to break the eggs into simmering water for one minute, not boiling water, to seal them, then take it off the boil and leave the eggs sitting in hot water to set. She doesn't say for how long.

Another of Delia's top tips is to break the eggs one at a time. Clever that. I've never tried to break eggs two or three at a time - I don't have giant hands - but one day I may give it a go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 12 February, 2011, 09:41:04 PM
The cling film version is probably the easiest. I'd never successfully made poached eggs before I discovered that method.

It's interesting that on every geek website I visit we have ALL discussed different methods of making poached eggs. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 12 February, 2011, 09:47:33 PM
dry fry are best if you have a good non stick pan.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 12 February, 2011, 09:54:27 PM
I'm hopeless at poached eggs. They're frustrating. They look like you are doing the right thing then as the yellow cooks to its required level, the white separates.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 12 February, 2011, 10:01:15 PM
maybe some sort of tight meshy "bag" to keep the bugger bound for the couple of mins ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 12 February, 2011, 10:35:15 PM
Eggs are stupid. Are you so fat and lazy that you can't be bothered to walk to get McMuffins, Dr Kernyte?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 12 February, 2011, 11:20:52 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 12 February, 2011, 10:01:15 PM
maybe some sort of tight meshy "bag" to keep the bugger bound for the couple of mins ?
That's all the cling film method is really.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 February, 2011, 07:08:01 PM
I was punching myself in the face and I punched too hard
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 February, 2011, 07:19:16 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 13 February, 2011, 07:08:01 PM
I was punching myself in the face and I punched too hard

Keep up the good work  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 13 February, 2011, 09:26:53 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 12 February, 2011, 11:20:52 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 12 February, 2011, 10:01:15 PM
maybe some sort of tight meshy "bag" to keep the bugger bound for the couple of mins ?
That's all the cling film method is really.





V


ahh,thatll teach me not to read posts properly i thought it was a dangly cling film over edge of pan in which case it would melt :-[

gonna give it a go for tea or whenever. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 14 February, 2011, 09:07:23 PM
Tomorrow is the first day of my new working pattern of midweek 6am starts, so I have to go to bed at 10pm. Also I've got two students I agreed to help by looking at their work and writing them some supplementary notes, but those notes are overdue. Good job both of them have March deadlines for their assignments.

I'm pretty tired. I'll look at it tomorrow when I've got eight hours to spare, and hope they don't get too panicky in the meantime. I'm not doing other people's homework for them on Valentine's Day anyway.

:|


Update: nah, I've had feedback from both of them and they're okay with it. Early night then with a clear conscience.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 15 February, 2011, 01:55:09 AM
This weekend I was given a couple of quid extra change than I should've in a shop. It wasn't an independent shop but a very large chain. If it was an indie, I would've gone back. I had money put back on my Oyster (travel) card as I was recently overcharged. Then I came across an unopened small envelope which I was given as a birthday present – no idea how many years ago. Had a tenner in it.

Flipside: I reminded someone at work by email a few weeks ago that I hadn't paid for Christmas work meal. She was back in today. I owe £45!!! I'll mention that I left a couple of hours before some of the others who carried on drinking but I won't push the point.

Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 03:57:50 PM
Hmmm. Bad move! The smart thing to do would've been to work out your share of the bill and leave that amount of money on the table, rounded up to the nearest fiver to allow for ambiguities.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 February, 2011, 04:09:35 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 03:57:50 PM
Hmmm. Bad move! The smart thing to do would've been to work out your share of the bill and leave that amount of money on the table, rounded up to the nearest fiver to allow for ambiguities.

Plus the extra tenner you always have to put in because one or two unknown people seem to have mysteriously avoided paying any actual cash, despite being ticked off on the 'paid' list.  These are usually the ones that were quaffing brandies all night.  Grumble.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 04:43:39 PM
Nope, no extra tenner from me. I paid before I left!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 February, 2011, 04:44:45 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 04:43:39 PM
Nope, no extra tenner from me. I paid before I left!

For all those brandies?  I think not.  That's the problem with wearing a burgundy frock coat - you're the obvious suspect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 04:45:50 PM
Well I didn't order them! I left before the brandy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 15 February, 2011, 04:55:24 PM
Just came home to some woman watching her dog poop on the pavement in front of my door. I did ask her if she was planning on picking it up but she just looked confused and walked away. Well annoyed me that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 06:04:12 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 15 February, 2011, 04:55:24 PM
Just came home to some woman watching her dog poop on the pavement in front of my door. I did ask her if she was planning on picking it up but she just looked confused and walked away. Well annoyed me that.

You should have followed her home. If she asked what you were up to, you could have said "I want to see if there's dogshit on the pavement outside your house as well."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 15 February, 2011, 07:51:35 PM
Or you could do what my neighbour did, upon someone doing the same thing outside his front step: go and have a blazing row with them, then kick -yes, kick- the splatty pile of dogshit at them. But he is completely mad and has anger management issues.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 16 February, 2011, 01:04:16 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 15 February, 2011, 03:57:50 PM
Hmmm. Bad move! The smart thing to do would've been to work out your share of the bill and leave that amount of money on the table, rounded up to the nearest fiver to allow for ambiguities.
True. I just stuffed my face and scarpered without even thinking about paying. Guess that serves me right.

As for dogs crapping/pissing on walls I had a go at someone who was letting his dog piss up the wall where we live. Me: "Oy!" Him: "What?" "Your dog is pissing on my wall" "So?" "Take it to piss up your own wall" "I do". Can't remember the exact abuse I gave him following that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 16 February, 2011, 07:40:03 AM
Reported.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 16 February, 2011, 07:57:49 AM
spammers jamming up the board.
do they really think flooding a board with nosensical posts with a link on the bottom is actually goiung to get them any extra clicks on their poxy friggen sites.
F$#K OFF.  prom dresses thats really what we'd be looking for on this site, i'd understand if it was something us nerdy types would buy (you know Hot Russian girlfriends or some such) but Prom Dresses come-on.

CU Radbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 February, 2011, 08:27:23 AM
22 changes, amendments and corrections for an A5 leaflet design. Can you tell this one is being run by a committee...(!) Example...

a) get rid of the office number

b) leave the office number

Grrr...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 16 February, 2011, 05:01:46 PM
Tickets for the Carter USM gig later this went on sale today. Sadly I am too skint to buy any at present.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 16 February, 2011, 05:37:32 PM
Got hit with an unexpected £104 council tax bill in the same week I received a £124 income tax rebate. Pissflaps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 16 February, 2011, 10:57:07 PM
To make eldest son happy, i went into whs to buy pokemon cards. £3.99 per pack! starter set £11.99! i remember when cards were 25p for six AND you got gum with them, AND if you were really lucky c3po had a metal cock.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 16 February, 2011, 11:05:39 PM
Ooh, Master luke...


(http://botropolis.com/wp-content/uploads/c3po.jpg)


He's such a whore, he'll sell anything between his legs.


(http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff248/burlearth/2280366334_026bdb32a6.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 17 February, 2011, 06:51:03 PM
The boss has announced that there will be four redundancies out of a work force of eighteen. Cue rabid backstabbing and suddenly discovered work related injuries.  ::)

And the people doing this? The four who've taken the piss for years and know their time is up. What an amazing coincidence. Quite amusing but at the same time a pain in the arse, I'll be glad when it's all done with.

I'll be fine, 'cause I'm awesome.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 February, 2011, 07:12:52 PM
My house has been invaded by a mouse.  :(

I'm 90% certain it's just the one, and fairly certain it's not a pregnant female. Grrr, hassle.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 February, 2011, 07:21:56 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 17 February, 2011, 07:12:52 PM
My house has been invaded by a mouse.  :(

I'm 90% certain it's just the one, and fairly certain it's not a pregnant female. Grrr, hassle.

I also had a mousey vist recently. The bastard chewed the corner off every single stock cube in the box. If it's just finished ONE before unwrapping the next, I wouldn't have minded much!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 17 February, 2011, 08:35:28 PM
I actually like mice!

Not that I'm offering to provide alternate lodgings. I don't think my Dad's wife would appreciate that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 17 February, 2011, 10:54:26 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 17 February, 2011, 07:21:56 PM
I also had a mousey vist recently. The bastard chewed the corner off every single stock cube in the box.

If you're lucky it will die of hypertension or kidney failure before you have to poison it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 18 February, 2011, 12:16:55 PM
I'm in the office so dare not open the 'underware' thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 February, 2011, 12:49:31 PM
Similarly for me. And the News and Weather Presenter thread.



I remember teh Great Mouse War of the Millenium in our house.  You could hear the little sods running up and down the walls there so many of them.   I kept using humane mouse traps (got rid of 14 mice over ten day period) and eventually had to give in and use poison when they started crawling and eating stuff in Tiny Tips cupboard under the stairs crib. Tough decision for a vegetarian.


I have since discovered that you need to take them at least FIVE miles away from your house (not just down the hill and across the burn) to stop the little fekkers coming back.  So I may have taken the same mouse out 14 times.  Oh and use peanut butter in the traps; it's harder for them to pick up and walk off with.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 February, 2011, 02:36:37 PM
Answerphone messages that just say "please give me a call". What is the point?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: satchmo on 18 February, 2011, 02:41:04 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 18 February, 2011, 12:49:31 PM
Similarly for me. And the News and Weather Presenter thread.



I remember teh Great Mouse War of the Millenium in our house.  You could hear the little sods running up and down the walls there so many of them.   I kept using humane mouse traps (got rid of 14 mice over ten day period) and eventually had to give in and use poison when they started crawling and eating stuff in Tiny Tips cupboard under the stairs crib. Tough decision for a vegetarian.


I have since discovered that you need to take them at least FIVE miles away from your house (not just down the hill and across the burn) to stop the little fekkers coming back.  So I may have taken the same mouse out 14 times.  Oh and use peanut butter in the traps; it's harder for them to pick up and walk off with.


FIVE MILES?! Jebus, I was only taking them down the allotments during my own Mouse-o-geddon years ago. I was ejecting the same ones again and again by the sound of that. Mouse infestation isn't much fun. And I'm afraid if you see one, there's very probably a lot more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 19 February, 2011, 07:37:18 PM
I got conned out of a fiver (which I didn't know I had) from a suspected druggie (a drug addict) who claimed he was diabetic on Thursday. It happened outside the City Library in Newcastle (besides the stairs & near the bus stops for all you Geordies) after I had just finished a Confidence class (to help me get a job) and before I was heading to Forbidden Planet/Waterstone's to get Dredd Case Files 17 & the novel version of The Force Unleashed 2 respectively. He even give me a phone number (07979352324 (hey, I never said that I know the first five digits of a mobile phone)) and called himself "Steve". I did catch which bus he got on (39 to Jarrow). I've only told my brother and tomorrow night, I'll tell a friend of mine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 22 February, 2011, 06:19:44 AM
One of my cats got run over yesterday afternoon. Death was presumably instantaneous, so at least he didn't suffer.

Careless bloody drivers on my estate, ugh. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 February, 2011, 08:07:23 AM
Sorry to hear that, Christov. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 22 February, 2011, 08:55:52 AM
Quote from: Christov on 22 February, 2011, 06:19:44 AM
One of my cats got run over yesterday afternoon. Death was presumably instantaneous, so at least he didn't suffer.

Careless bloody drivers on my estate, ugh. 

That's fucking shit. So sorry  :( :( :(

When anything happens to either of my cats I don't think I will deal with it well at all....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 22 February, 2011, 12:33:20 PM
our car's not well,between us we've apparently over egged the pudding,the pudding being the car and the egg being oil...waiting for the brother in law to get off his arse and sort it out for us as we go to york on thursday and dont fancy paying £70 for train fares for the three of us!
  it also means waiting in for him to turnup so thats two days wasted when i could be taking mini out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 22 February, 2011, 12:42:31 PM
I did a massive limpet poo.

Not only gigantic in size but also epic in it's adhesiveness (five flushes failed to dislodge it so I had to get out the brush) and it looked like it came out in two different directions.

I was going to get somebody to look at it because it was so large, sticky and multi-directional that I thought there might be something wrong with me.

And then, as the comedian once said, if I'm getting people to come and look at my poo, there is definitely something wrong with me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 22 February, 2011, 12:44:36 PM
way too much info, its NHS 24 you want...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 22 February, 2011, 12:56:55 PM
my wife and daughter got me a tardis cake once i nearly died when i saw the green poo!
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 22 February, 2011, 12:58:20 PM
Looks like Mog's not the only one who's been over-egging his pudding... :D

Edit: Ha! Beat me to it! I got a TARDIS cake for my last birthday and also observed some... irregularities.

My erstwhile compadre BrianO informs me if you eat enough blue icing, your poo will eventually start coming out blue. Best not to ask, really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 22 February, 2011, 01:04:31 PM
Well if you can't put it on this thread on this forum, where can you put it.

You've got me thinking about experimenting with colour now...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 February, 2011, 02:03:35 PM
Did one this morning and it was really hard going. It wasn't large, it just seemed real reluctant. It was a proper sized affair, so I wasn't willing something that wasn't willing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 February, 2011, 02:07:50 PM
You guys need more fibre! Eat a packet of ryvita or a couple of bowls of all bran and tomorrow's deposit will leave you like a bullet from a gun.

I thought I had a gastrointestinal bleed once till I remembered I'd been eating lots of beetroot.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 22 February, 2011, 02:09:36 PM
I've got a few bottles of food colouring in the kitchen, somewhere... >:D
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 22 February, 2011, 08:12:27 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 22 February, 2011, 02:09:36 PM
I've got a few bottles of food colouring in the kitchen, somewhere... >:D
Are you reading my mind. Start a thread with photographic results. The best one wins a pat on the back.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 22 February, 2011, 09:50:53 PM
This thread has turned to shit!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 22 February, 2011, 09:56:05 PM
If you eat lots of blueberries, you get the fibre, plus the added bonus of the blu-poo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 22 February, 2011, 10:03:53 PM
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 22 February, 2011, 09:56:05 PM
If you eat lots of blueberries, you get the fibre, plus the added bonus of the blu-poo.

When my second son was born, I did a lot of running back and forth to the hospital for a few days, and in that time had no time to eat anything but bananas.Poo came out in tiny little dry pebbles and required next to no wiping.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 February, 2011, 10:06:52 PM
You can get edible glitter for cakes and things - apparently if you eat that your poo comes out all glittery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 February, 2011, 10:08:35 PM
What would you have done if someone had lit a match near you and the elevated potassium content in your blood caused you to explode...






...WHILE YOU WERE HOLDING YOUR INFANT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2011, 02:06:59 AM
Just saw a fox run past the front door, on the other side of the street. Looks like the traps will be out tomorrow!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 23 February, 2011, 09:26:54 AM
Quote from: radiator on 22 February, 2011, 10:06:52 PM
You can get edible glitter for cakes and things - apparently if you eat that your poo comes out all glittery.


Over the Christmas period I changed my youngest daughter's nappy only to find that her poo had tinsel in it, it gave the whole proceeding a nice seasonal theme.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 23 February, 2011, 03:50:49 PM
Because my youngest son smashed my lounge window this morning, necessitating the services of a glazier, and because my wife has fucked off for the day and appears to have taken the laptop with her, for no good reason.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 23 February, 2011, 07:04:42 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2011, 02:06:59 AM
Just saw a fox run past the front door, on the other side of the street. Looks like the traps will be out tomorrow!
I saw two of the buggers on the way to work the other morning....in central Portsmouth!  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 23 February, 2011, 07:25:13 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 February, 2011, 02:06:59 AM
Just saw a fox run past the front door, on the other side of the street. Looks like the traps will be out tomorrow!

hey,when the cats away! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 23 February, 2011, 07:35:14 PM
My wife wants her contraceptive implant taken out and we've hardly used it yet :(

She wants to have a chat about alternatives later, I'm guessing that she wants me to get my tackle decommissioned  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 23 February, 2011, 07:52:04 PM
Ouch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 February, 2011, 12:35:17 AM
My fingers have lots of tiny little needle pricks in them. I have sewn five buttons back on my rather nice Police jacket.  At first I thought theyd fallen off because I am a fatboy and it was bursting at the seams. But no, just shoddy workmanship on the buttons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 25 February, 2011, 12:28:34 PM
Just found out I've been on the wrong tax rate for the last two years - some kind of mix-up between the revenue and the company I work in - which essentially means I havent been paying enough tax since 2009 and am now about to get shit on from a great height. In the seven weeks of this year alone I already owe 300 quid........christ almighty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 February, 2011, 12:41:27 PM
Quote from: Van Dom on 25 February, 2011, 12:28:34 PM
Just found out I've been on the wrong tax rate for the last two years - some kind of mix-up between the revenue and the company I work in - which essentially means I havent been paying enough tax since 2009 and am now about to get shit on from a great height. In the seven weeks of this year alone I already owe 300 quid........christ almighty.

That is a f'ing ghastly situation.  Our company totally cocked up tax for one of our staff last year (entered the wrong credits into the payroll system), but mercifully I caught it while doing  the end of year accounts, so we were able to pay up on her account and let her pay the difference back to us as an interest-free loan over the coming year.  It came to nearly €2K.  

I am however a bit amazed that that this problem could extend over multiple years, since your employer would be sent new tax credit details by the Revenue each January, which means multiple SNAFUs.  From our experience I know the Revenue is utterly uncaring ("it's your responsibility to ensure your own tax is correct", blah blah blah), but your employer should accept some responsibility and extend you some flexibility.  Maybe you could see if the company could do something similar to our loan plan to help spread the pain?    

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: EddieHitler on 25 February, 2011, 01:35:32 PM
Life is riddled with tossers who when using the computer in the library think that we can not hear their crappy music leaking out from their crappy headphones and then take great offence when this is pointed out to them!

May they all die a terrible death!

I feel better now  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 25 February, 2011, 01:49:37 PM
One of the smartest bands in the country, Oceansize have just split up. The selfish bastards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 February, 2011, 04:41:52 PM
In my efforts to track books around my local waterstones, following events on the FLU thread, today i had a browse. Heh. I found:
Charley's War vol 6 in the 'war' section.
JD casefiles 15 in the 'humour' section.
max brooks' world war z in the 'humour' section.
the recent dan dare 'biography' in the 'humour section'.
and still hoo-haa's Flu sits in 'teenage'.
:-/
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 25 February, 2011, 06:25:45 PM
Apparently some scientist or whatever has deemed it unhealthy to eat Red Meat regularly, in moderation is the advice.
Well bollocks to you all. If I listened to all the advice and scare mongering that hits the news that some commissioned group has done I wouldn't eat or drink anything and would be shit scared to leave my home, which also is a death trap.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 26 February, 2011, 02:47:38 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 25 February, 2011, 06:25:45 PM
Apparently some scientist or whatever has deemed it unhealthy to eat Red Meat regularly, in moderation is the advice.

Right! Apparently we're in bigger risk of bowel cancer assuming it's the same source. I heard it from a pretty news lady*. They said the intake should be the equivalent of 2 sausages...

Yeah, I don't worry about that too much.. although it's probably not a bad idea to cut back a bit.

*One for that other thread.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 26 February, 2011, 04:27:52 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 26 February, 2011, 02:47:38 AM
They said the intake should be the equivalent of 2 sausages...

So practically no meat at all, then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 February, 2011, 11:31:50 PM
After the England match I took Sam down to Pizza Hut, that's right folks no cooking for me again. Anyway we sat at our table and waited for over 10 minutes before we were asked what drinks we wanted, so when the waitress came over I put the full order in so as to save delays.
There was only one complicated (not really if you ask me) part. We wanted a large pizza to share but when the mushrooms go on, to put them on 3 out of the 8 slices as that is the part Sam will eat and due to him being 12 he'll be eating less than me.

I heard the waitress give the order to the cretin doing the food, she had to explain that it wasn't a half and half pizza a few times but it was less than half with mushrooms.

When it came to the serving hatch I heard her again saying that this is not what the customer ordered. He obviously took it back and just moved the mushrooms off my part.

The meal then arrives and Sam jumps straight in and starts eating a slice. I on the other hand can see small bits of mushroom all over the fucking thing. I pick them off and place them on Sam's slices. Now comes the worst part, the thing was luke warm! What do I do, get another one and probably have spit mixed in or just eat the thing, especially as Sam was not complaining (not that he would).

I thought, you know what John, just this once eat it and just bugger off without an argument. By the time I ate my last slice it was stone cold and by God I ate fast.

The waitress then returns and says "How was everything Sir?" I looked up at her and (amazingly for me) politely said in hushed tones, so as not to embarrass her. "That was luke warm when I started eating it and stone cold when I started the last slice. When we order a pizza delivery it turns up hotter than that. I also heard you tell that cretin in there what the order was a few times at the window and even when it was ready it was still wrong, yes I heard it all from here." At this point I could see her lip quiver and a tear start to form. I reassured her that I had no problem with her service but the rest of the team had let her down big time and this was the reason I was speaking so quietly as I didn't want her to feel embarrassed from a shouting customer. She couldn't apologise enough and was very helpful the rest of the time and kept apologising. I told her that when they have a team debriefing or whatever they do, they want to have serious words with the so called 'chefs'.

When the bill came she had knocked a part of the bill off and I still gave her a tip as I felt her service was great and like I said she was let down by others.

All in all a great evening out for me and Sam  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 February, 2011, 11:34:50 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 February, 2011, 11:31:50 PMI told her that when they have a team debriefing or whatever they do, they want to have serious words with the so called 'chefs'.

Not done much restaurant work then, CF?   :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 February, 2011, 11:40:02 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 26 February, 2011, 11:34:50 PM
Not done much restaurant work then, CF?   :D

I've eaten in a lot. I suppose you'll be telling me that they don't have such a thing.
You do realise what this means if they don't, I will have to charge into the kitchen and disarm the first chef of his knife and thrust it through his eye. Perhaps that would get the message across  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 28 February, 2011, 05:25:15 PM
Just called up British Gas because my final bill (I've switched to a cheaper supplier) sounded expensive at £420. I went through my previous bills and meter readings with them and it turns out that I actually owe them over £600.
Fucking bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 28 February, 2011, 07:00:17 PM
FUCK YOU ABC I'M OLD ENOUGH TO DECIDE WHETHER I WANT TO SEE WILL ARNETT'S WANG.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cthulouis on 01 March, 2011, 10:07:42 AM
Because today I'm having a wisdom tooth pulled out :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 March, 2011, 05:45:07 PM
I don't currently have £10,000 to spare for this:

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/2000AD-3-FULL-STORY-2ND-JUDGE-DREDD-ORIGINAL-ART-/200575030298?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_3&hash=item2eb334141a

But, at £2,500 per page, I'd say that's a bargain.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 01 March, 2011, 06:06:13 PM
Isn't this about the ten millionth time that's been listed?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 01 March, 2011, 06:17:52 PM
Possibly. But it just goes to show that the bloody thing never sells :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 March, 2011, 06:19:23 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 01 March, 2011, 06:06:13 PM
Isn't this about the ten millionth time that's been listed?

Possibly, but I've not seen it before- or the prog #0 page of Mach One (or "Probe" or "A Man Called PROBE" or whatever).

But this did make me laugh.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Robin-1913-French-Watercolor-Original-Comic-Book-Art-/350279199585?pt=Art_Paintings&hash=item518e446b61

It should I guess go on the Ebay mentalism thread... but it's not really mental, just (in my illeducated art opinion) very, very bad. In fact, I could happily knock you up ten of them over the next hour, if you'd deliver me ten boards, some brushes, a picture of Burt Ward, and a fucking blindfold.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 01 March, 2011, 06:19:46 PM
Work have just asked me to prove what I was doing between the 7th of February 2088 and the 20th of April 2010.

I can't think of a suitable answer that doesn't involve a Tardis, a Delorean or an Einstein-Rosen bridge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 March, 2011, 06:37:35 PM
I have corpse piles for hire, Worldshown.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 01 March, 2011, 06:48:35 PM
That probably would stop them asking any further questions, Roger.

Directly, in any case.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 March, 2011, 06:49:13 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 01 March, 2011, 06:19:46 PM
Work have just asked me to prove what I was doing between the 7th of February 2088 and the 20th of April 2010.

Sounds sinister even with the correct dates. What's it to them anyway?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 01 March, 2011, 07:22:14 PM
It's the joy of working in financial services. You have to prove that you weren't a crook before you joined them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 March, 2011, 08:27:03 PM
Quote from: worldshown on 01 March, 2011, 07:22:14 PM
It's the joy of working in financial services. You have to prove that you weren't a crook before you joined them.

They like a blank canvass to work with, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 02 March, 2011, 12:16:21 PM
Yesterday I went into a bookshop and saw Case Files 17 and Greysuit trades. Only after buying them and walking down the street did i remember that this leaves me with nothing to buy at the meet on Saturday (although I'll find something) and I've also paid full price for them when even Forbidden Planet would have had a few quid off. Silly Colin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 March, 2011, 12:29:06 AM
Opened up my package from the 'zon and the book I had purchased had a yellow post-it with "P18" affixed to the front cover.

The book is Dash Shaw's "Unclothed Man..." You need this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 March, 2011, 02:36:10 AM
System Tool.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 04 March, 2011, 02:38:42 PM
Eh?

Also, what was on page 18?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 05 March, 2011, 01:29:07 PM
My oldest daughter decided that she would wake everybody up about once every hour last night and make unreasonable demands for drinks and food and for the witches and various other supernatural creatures to be removed from her room.

She then decided that 5.30 AM was a good time to get up and drag me downstairs and make me watch Spongebob. Naturally all this has made us both tired, uncooperative and stroppy and an absolute joy to be with.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 06 March, 2011, 03:00:50 AM
After I left Peter Wolf at Victoria I went to see what platform the 21:37 train back home was on, only to find that it was cancelled, so I had to wait for the 22:07. No big deal I thought but the worst was still to come.

I relaxed on a seat as the carriage filled up with quite a few people. I had a look round and saw it was an average bunch of people. This was until we stopped at Bromley, when the drunks and partygoers joined us.

Anyway, three girls sat one row down and across from me, all dolled up and heading to Maidstone for the nightlife. They happily chatted away and then the shits came into the carriage, three loud twats trying to pick the girls up with the strangest method I had ever heard. Whilst they were doing this I noticed that they had clocked my badge on the troop rugby top I was wearing, so they knew what I was!

I sat there while the drunks became more and more disgusting with their chosen phrases and words used. Let's just say I thought it was well out of order and the girls just giggled away but looked a bit nervous (these lads were probably early 20's). I was wondering if yet again I would have to intervene and all hell would kick off.

All of a sudden the two ladies in front of me (I didn't even know anyone was there) asked them to stop their foul tirade in a polite manner. The comeback was unbelievable "Why don't you fuck off down there you stupid c**ts" followed by even louder and more crude suggestions.

At this stage I was thinking, fucking hell John you are gonna have to intervene and sod what might happen. If it all kicks off then surely the rest of the blokes in the carriage will help out. I knew that the two ladies must have wondered why no one else was helping them out as it was horrible.

Bollocks! I stood up and said something along the lines of "Oi, come on now, you're not in a train full of men only. These two ladies have asked you to stop and only after quite a long time of foul and abusive language. There's no need for it!"

Here it comes I thought, get ready for the abuse followed by the fight but no I was stunned.
"Sorry mate, you're right, we'll stop it"  :o :o :o :o :o :o

The two ladies turned around and thanked me, as I was wondering what shit would happen as we bloody well all got off at Maidstone. Amazingly nothing happened and I went home with a smile on my face.

BUT, yet again I have felt obliged to step in when many others have done nothing. I tell you, this is the way I am gonna leave this mortal coil  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 06 March, 2011, 03:07:34 AM
Judge Burdis - He IS the law!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 06 March, 2011, 06:33:15 AM
Good on you CF.
I think that the past 10 years has given the armed forces renewed respect amongst the younger generation. There cant be many youth's that haven't had friends/family currently or recently in the forces and there are so many who have been maimed, which the media should concentrate more on but don't. It is a bad time at the moment and with the Black Watch supposedly on stand by for Lybia (another oil rich country) it can only get worse. [/Rant]





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 March, 2011, 08:53:33 AM
Good man, CF, if only there were more like you.  I was half expecting a re-run of the Lone-Gurkha-versus-40-Rapists incident, but I think it probably turned out for the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 01:09:09 PM
Well done John, it's never easy to speak up in a situation like that. We see enough stories in the media of people attacked and killed all because they intervened to help somebody. In a society that continues to grow with disrespectful young people (that makes me sound old but i'm not, i'm only 38) fuelled by alcohol and a government weak, spineless, afraid of the EU and their limpwristed laws that do nothing to protect the public it falls upon the ordinary man/woman to step in. This in turn leads to untold consequences (injury, imprisonment, bereavement etc) that can effect us physically, mentally and emotionally which can last for a lifetime.

I have been in similar situations before so I know how you feel, hopefully by helping to bring a bit of peace and normality back the young lads will look back at their behaviour with shame and regret and the ladies will not be put off going out again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 06 March, 2011, 01:14:11 PM
Good one CF. Apparently, the more people are around, the less likely someone else is to intervene to help someone out when there are incidents.

A few months back I was on a very crowded bus waiting to leave the station and there was an extremely aggressive bloke who was either out of his head on drugs or with severe mental health issues (or both) who was screaming abuse at passengers and cursing people of (shall we say) a different ethnic group to himself. He terrified one man who left the bus, telling him "I will burn you and your family in your house." I was psyching myself up for my response if he found his way to me at the back of the bus, when security came to get him off. One brave young Asian woman pointed him out to security but other than that no one got involved. Not surprising really as he was so aggressive. Sadly, if things kick off in such situations I think the assumption should always be that one is on their own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 March, 2011, 01:15:10 PM
Quote from: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 01:09:09 PM...afraid of the EU and their limpwristed laws that do nothing to protect the public

Examples, please?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 06 March, 2011, 01:38:21 PM
Good man, John.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 01:47:31 PM
Here it is:-

Any EU citizen is free to seek employment in Britain, and may have a legitimate benefit claim in the UK.

Polish criminal gangs are defrauding the benefits system and conning banks by luring poverty-stricken Poles to Britain with false promises of work and then stealing their identities.

"I just grabbed my child and never went back.

"I left everything in the flat - a buggy, my child's cot and all of our clothes - everything."

Anna - not her real name - is a single mum in her late twenties, from Poland. She anxiously recalls how she fled a criminal gang in London who were using her identity to cheat the benefits system and run up large debts in her name.

In an interview with 5 Live Investigates, she explains that she was lured by a friend who promised her free travel to the UK and work when she arrived - only to discover that her real job was to unwittingly assist the fraudsters.

"The lady, who was a member of the gang, was very nice to me. One day she took me to the Jobcentre and a bank. She explained I needed to apply for a National Insurance number, before I could get a job.

"At the time, when I came to the UK, I was not able to speak or read in English. I had no idea what she, as my interpreter, said on my behalf, and what kind of questions the Jobcentre officer asked her. I had no idea what is legal and what is not.

"The gang applied, on my behalf, for child benefit, working tax credit and child tax credit - and they registered me as self-employed."

Elaborate scam

As a declared self-employed person with a child, Anna was eligible for benefits and tax credits worth up to £7,500 per year if the gang pretended she was working.

Suffice to say, it was the gang who were reaping the rewards since they controlled her bank account and employment returns.

Anna's criminal handlers stole her ID card and her child's passport, and tried blackmailing her to return to Poland to recruit more victims. She was told to lie and tell people she could guarantee them three month's wages.

The day before the gang had planned to fly her back to Poland, Anna found an excuse to leave the home she shared with other migrants.

"I said, 'I want to visit my friend and say goodbye'."

Instead, she ran away.

It is believed the criminal gangs which lured Anna to London are specifically targeting the UK.  Soren Petersen, spokesperson for Europol, the European law enforcement organisation, told 5 live Investigates: "It seems to mainly be a UK phenomenon and the British authorities are aware of it.

"Europol has not received any information or inquiries from other major western European countries concerning the trafficking of people from Poland, or other accession countries, in order to use their identities for credit fraud or to claim benefits."

Need I say more!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 March, 2011, 01:54:33 PM
So the "limpwristed EU law" is the right of freedom of movement and employment between member countries?  What you describe is benefit fraud - which is against the law anywhere in the EU, and has absolutely nothing to do with CF standing up to loudmouth cretins on the train.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 06 March, 2011, 02:03:16 PM
Quote from: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 01:47:31 PM"It seems to mainly be a UK phenomenon and the British authorities are aware of it.


No fan of the EU but the words quoted above say something else. Creating more/harsher laws won't solve a problem like this anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 02:20:34 PM
What i'm trying to say is that our own current legal system is outdated and needs to be reformed, we really don't need any other laws from the EU or anywhere else which in turn erodes and adds to our justice system that currently seems to reward and protects/promotes the criminals and their rights over the victim. The trial of an accused criminal is often delayed for weeks, months or even years. In some cases, the accused is allowed to roam free "on bail" enabling him to commit further crimes before being judged for the first. To add to this the accused can procure the advice and counsel of a solicitor/barrister for the sole purpose of doing everything in their power to set the accused free. How many times has a person with money/celebrity status being freed/fined on a similar or lesser offense against a person of average/poor status who has been jailed. This isn't particulary difficult to do since accused persons are judged before a "jury of their peers"-that is, ordinary people picked at random who have absolutely no knowledge of the legal system and who themselves are open to bribery and corruption. Judges themselves appear to not live in a realistic world and those who wish to hand down tougher sentences on the most violent/sexual of crimes find their sentences reduced on appeal or their hands tied due to outdated laws.

'Crime takes it's toll on the individual which in turn creates an enormous financial burden on the community as a whole. It's our taxes which support criminals once charged and sent to prison. Food, housing, health care and even entertainment are provided by us, the very people criminals vicitimise.

It should be the inmates who bear the cost of their incarceration, prisons should be built by prison labour. Cost of of the materials can be recovered by his/hers possesions such as Property, Vehicles, Money etc and not given back upon release. Prisoners should be making goods which can be sold to cover costs such as utilities and as well as food eaten to be grown by the prisoners themselves. Clothes the prisoners wear could be made and "entertainment" could be restricted to health-related activites as a lot of prisons at home and abroad already provide.

Prisoners should not be paid wages as they currently are but instead upon release receive the equivalent of one month's income based on current mininmum wage standards as well as receiving support and rehabilatation when applying for employment whether they have served six months or thirty years.'

Nuff said!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 06 March, 2011, 02:34:15 PM
Those are societal problems in most western countries and it's more to do with 'root' problems. Locking people up with the worst elements in society doesn't solve the problem either; basically the gist of what you are saying is give criminals jobs, a home and a purpose in life, which really goes back to the root problems of not havng those things in the first place mainly because of the increasingly organized/in-built disparities of western bureaucracies. The prison system favours the rich too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 03:33:09 PM
As a species we are imperfect and have many flaws, these if left ignored or exploited can lead to individuals indeed causing problems within society which can then lead to crimes being committed. Everything we do good or bad leads to positive and negative consequences and it's these negative consequences that people need to be held accountable for through financial penalties/community service or loss of freedom. Criminals once released after completing their penalties/service or unpaid work have as much rights as everybody else seeking financial, physical and emotional support in finding work and a home in order to fit back into society. The important steps to take whilst the prisoner is in prison is improving their mental and emotional well being. Without the help/support whilst inside a prisoner is more likely to re-offend them be grounded upon release and seeking a better life for him/herself. But this doesn't mean that a prisoners life should be easy, the person still needs to be held accountable and that what prison should be for. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 06 March, 2011, 04:20:26 PM
Please take any further discussion of this topic to The Political Thread, because that's what it's there for.

http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,28209.1380.html (http://www.2000adonline.com/forum/index.php/topic,28209.1380.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 March, 2011, 04:47:38 PM
I'm disappointed CF didn't get to punch anyone's nose-bone into their brain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 March, 2011, 04:57:03 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 06 March, 2011, 04:47:38 PM
I'm disappointed CF didn't get to punch anyone's nose-bone into their brain.

Only a matter of time.  I've a tenner on that it happens before the end of the decade.  I stand to win €15!  Problem is hiring these gangs of youfs to hassle those around him isn't cheap.  At least smartphone updates make him easy to track.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 March, 2011, 07:23:34 PM
I finally used up all of my Adidas: Ice deodorant and was looking forward to a good few months of L'oreal, Dove For Men and Gillette deo fun, but there was a another can lurking at the back of my deo pile. Another can of Adidas: Fresh Impact. I can't even spray it where it needs to be.


FUCK YOU ADIDAS.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 06 March, 2011, 07:35:08 PM
Quote from: Judge Palmer on 06 March, 2011, 01:47:31 PM
Here it is:-

Any EU citizen is free to seek employment in Britain, and may have a legitimate benefit claim in the UK.

Polish criminal gangs are defrauding the benefits system and conning banks by luring poverty-stricken Poles to Britain with false promises of work and then stealing their identities.

"I just grabbed my child and never went back.

"I left everything in the flat - a buggy, my child's cot and all of our clothes - everything."

Anna - not her real name - is a single mum in her late twenties, from Poland. She anxiously recalls how she fled a criminal gang in London who were using her identity to cheat the benefits system and run up large debts in her name.

In an interview with 5 Live Investigates, she explains that she was lured by a friend who promised her free travel to the UK and work when she arrived - only to discover that her real job was to unwittingly assist the fraudsters.

"The lady, who was a member of the gang, was very nice to me. One day she took me to the Jobcentre and a bank. She explained I needed to apply for a National Insurance number, before I could get a job.

"At the time, when I came to the UK, I was not able to speak or read in English. I had no idea what she, as my interpreter, said on my behalf, and what kind of questions the Jobcentre officer asked her. I had no idea what is legal and what is not.

"The gang applied, on my behalf, for child benefit, working tax credit and child tax credit - and they registered me as self-employed."

Elaborate scam

As a declared self-employed person with a child, Anna was eligible for benefits and tax credits worth up to £7,500 per year if the gang pretended she was working.

Suffice to say, it was the gang who were reaping the rewards since they controlled her bank account and employment returns.

Anna's criminal handlers stole her ID card and her child's passport, and tried blackmailing her to return to Poland to recruit more victims. She was told to lie and tell people she could guarantee them three month's wages.

The day before the gang had planned to fly her back to Poland, Anna found an excuse to leave the home she shared with other migrants.

"I said, 'I want to visit my friend and say goodbye'."

Instead, she ran away.

It is believed the criminal gangs which lured Anna to London are specifically targeting the UK.  Soren Petersen, spokesperson for Europol, the European law enforcement organisation, told 5 live Investigates: "It seems to mainly be a UK phenomenon and the British authorities are aware of it.

"Europol has not received any information or inquiries from other major western European countries concerning the trafficking of people from Poland, or other accession countries, in order to use their identities for credit fraud or to claim benefits."

Need I say more!

i thought he meant the "human rights "act that allows failed asylum seekers to kill 12 yearold girls while banned then continue to drive regardless.

well done cf i wouldve probably just sunk quietly into my seat and hoped my stop was next but then i'm not a trained killer. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 March, 2011, 08:09:15 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer
Good one CF. Apparently, the more people are around, the less likely someone else is to intervene to help someone out when there are incidents.

Yup - it's known as 'diffusion of responsibility' - if I remember my compulsory Social Psychology module properly, from way back in 1994(!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 March, 2011, 10:27:58 PM
Think I might have owned my laptop. FUCK YOU STOLI.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 March, 2011, 09:40:27 AM
Last night I very suddenly came down with nasty flu-like symptons - twinges, pounding headache, nausea, muscle pains, overwhelming fatigue, shivering one minute, boiling hot the next...

Didn't go into work today, but don't feel up to doing anything at home, so it's likely I'll just loll about on the sofa all day, falling in and out of sleep.  :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 07 March, 2011, 01:10:06 PM
My 32pp A4 booklet Census form has a small code on it which allows me to complete the questionnaire online - therefore wasting the 32pp A4 booklet Census form.

In this age of austerity, it would have been wise to communicate the fact that you could do the Census online in a more cost-effective manner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 March, 2011, 07:22:31 PM
Last year when the wife's car tax was due we decided to just do it for six months so that it no longer came up at the same time as her MOT. It's due at the end of this month, which now coincides with her crippling insurance renewal.
Bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 March, 2011, 08:44:41 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 08 March, 2011, 07:22:31 PM
Last year when the wife's car tax was due we decided to just do it for six months so that it no longer came up at the same time as her MOT. It's due at the end of this month, which now coincides with her crippling insurance renewal.
Bollocks.
Thanx for the tax reminder. I was given the tax disc for my van last week and stowed it away in the glove compartment. Without this I would have totally forgot to put in in the proper place and probably thrown it out when I do my monthly clean out of my van.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 09 March, 2011, 08:48:48 AM
2nd degree sunburn from being an absolute dick and not putting on any sunscreen at all during a 12 hour music festival, serves my freckly arse right if i end up with skin cancer.

CU Radbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 March, 2011, 09:05:53 AM
I got very similarly burnt during donnington monsters of rock, in 1990 (which was bloody awful from start to stop) and passed out during ac/dc's set. So i feel your pain. Calamine, Savlon, cool darkness.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 09 March, 2011, 07:14:43 PM
I was there that year SBT but I was hard core and lasted till the end.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 March, 2011, 07:54:23 PM
got our census,nosy bastards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 March, 2011, 07:59:44 PM
last night i used flora buttery in the making of pancakes only i left it on the heat too long at one point and it ignited i said something like "oops" and when the wife came in she freaked as she saw the two foot flame!it burnt itself out quickly and we still have a house but i may have to try that again next time i cant get the barbeque to light!!! :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 March, 2011, 08:00:34 PM
Bought the IDW/Desperado 'deadworld omnibus 1' today (£14.99, umpteen hundred pages, black and white). Recently, i gave all my old deadworlds to our locusts, having never been a fan particularly, but i had heard good things about these new ones, and thought i'd give it a go.

And yeah, it's really good. Or it is once i got past vince locke's bits.

However, as soon as i did get past the vince locke stuff, the book started to fall apart on me, literally! pages just dropping out en masse, despite careful handling, and now- at the end of the second miniseries- im left with basically a book of loose leaves. This pisses me off no end.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 March, 2011, 08:13:04 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 09 March, 2011, 07:59:44 PM
last night i used flora buttery in the making of pancakes

I think you had a lucky escape.  From eating pancakes made with Flora Buttery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 10 March, 2011, 10:01:39 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 March, 2011, 08:13:04 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 09 March, 2011, 07:59:44 PM
last night i used flora buttery in the making of pancakes

I think you had a lucky escape.  From eating pancakes made with Flora Buttery.

it was either that or extra virgin cyberlea...olive oil...


todays impediment was the fucker who rang froman unavailable number at 4 fucking 30 this morning we dived out of bed thinking my wifes mum was ill as shes nearly 80 ...and i couldn't get back to sleep and paid for it with a blinding migraine this lunchtime.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 March, 2011, 11:35:26 PM
...because I took Cyberleader off ignore to read his post on the "Drokkin' Fantastic" thread only to discover that he hadn't, actually, got laid but was enthusing about getting a cheap satellite feed.

Anyone who thinks that his failure to score on the "Social Life" thread was down to her should probably take note.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 11 March, 2011, 12:30:55 PM
Heh heh. That thought occurred to me as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 11 March, 2011, 12:54:01 PM
Oh and my home PC is gubbed again.

Not the hard drive this time, just the inability of the ten year old mother board to recognise the existence of the hard drive.

I'm beginning to think the idnustry assumes that a PC will turn to crap, become even more out of date and stop working on a regular basis, back up everything I need and buy a new PC every three years. That can't be right, surely.

I couldn't easily find replacement cartridges for my five year old printer recently (checked Asda/Tesco/PC World) and, as we needed to print something urgently, it worked out quicker and cheaper to buy a cheap scanner/printer from Asda (£30 - including a spare black ink cartridge) than to order them online.





Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 11 March, 2011, 01:10:19 PM
I've been told to have All Bran for breakfast by the doctor. All Bran is disgusting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 March, 2011, 01:24:27 PM
He's talking rubbish. You're probably all right eating bran flakes with a handful of raisins.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 11 March, 2011, 01:28:38 PM
I seem to be the only person who likes All Bran. It's my summer breakfast.

My minor impediment is that I've agreed to teach. Why did I do that? I was caught on the hop and I can't be arsed!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 March, 2011, 01:49:18 PM
I don't mind Bran Flakes (I'm a muesli man meself, when I can't/shouldn't get mounds of fried processed meats), but my sproglets love it -they eat it in preference to any of the other morning dross on offer from the own-brand generic dried pulp range, often with a side-order of fruit.  Little freaks - if I'm not careful they'll outlive me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 11 March, 2011, 02:08:21 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 11 March, 2011, 01:49:18 PM
Little freaks - if I'm not careful they'll outlive me.

You should encourage their healthy lifestyle at every turn. Try to think of them less as children, and more as a ready supply of genetically compatible spare parts.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 11 March, 2011, 05:55:10 PM
Well, as a Coco Pops/Weetos kind of guy it's not really starting my day with a taste sensation!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 March, 2011, 07:24:05 PM
Ryvita with jam will give you just as much fibre - mmmmm, sweet'n'crunchy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 11 March, 2011, 07:35:35 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 11 March, 2011, 07:24:05 PM
Ryvita with jam will give you just as much fibre - mmmmm, sweet'n'crunchy!

You know that actually sounds much better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 11 March, 2011, 08:13:22 PM
I usually keep about a dozen different kinds of breakfast cereal on the go. I can't resist cereal that's on special offer, and Tesco value bran flakes are exceedingly cheap full stop. When I was a kid I used to have to finish up a box before going on to the next one. Now I do my own shopping it doesn't matter as long as it gets used up before it goes stale. I don't generally feel like eating bran flakes more than twice a week.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 March, 2011, 04:20:38 PM
We did some shopping near the recycling/dump/tip and so decided to take some large cardboard boxes (the new table and chairs turned up in these) in the car to recycle, two birds, one stone.

Anyway, the queue outside the dump was massive, meaning that there must be at least 30 cars inside! So I decided to park down the road, well out of the way and walk them in. I just about walked onto the site and two tossers stopped me and asked where my car was. I told them it's 100 meters down the road. They said I couldn't come in on foot, due to 'Health & Safety'. I pointed out that there was a footpath behind them that went all the way up to the drop off point and it even has a person painted on it to indicate that. They didn't answer but just looked at me.

I moved up a gear, 'So what you are telling me is that I have to use the earths natural resources and sit in this queue wasting it by constantly turning the car on and off to move a place, so that I can save the earths natural resources by recycling this cardboard. Are you taking the piss?'

Again they just stood there so I finished with, 'I tell you what, I might as well just dump this down the road then if that's what you want but I won't I'll be going to the council and the Kent Messenger about this joke'

I am absolutely stunned. So Maidstone Borough Council will only let people recycle large items (that you can carry) if you use a car!
This is what pisses people off with all this recycling bollocks and before you say it, we do recycle but the more a stick is used the less I will end up doing it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 March, 2011, 04:53:33 PM
Dickheads! You should have fought them. Cardboard??? How could it have hurt anything at all for them to let someone walk onto the site via a footpath carrying cardboard? The fact that it took two of them to tell you you couldn't speaks volumes - maybe there wouldn't have been a queue of 30 cars if the site employees were a bit more active in getting people in and out of there. Please let us know what response you get from the Kent Messenger. I hope you did proceed to the cardboard skip anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 12 March, 2011, 05:33:16 PM
Could also have posted that in "Stupid things people have actually....." CF, it wouldn't have seemed out of place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 March, 2011, 05:41:39 PM
My reaction would probably have been to simply dump the box of rubbish in the path in front of them and walk off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 March, 2011, 09:59:45 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 March, 2011, 04:20:38 PM
This is what pisses people off with all this recycling bollocks and before you say it, we do recycle but the more a stick is used the less I will end up doing it!

Couldn't agree more.  I'm all for recycling and we put a fair bit of effort into it, just seems like a solid concept, but the amount of crapola you run into doing it is incredible.  I particularly enjoyed the bit where the cardboard I'd been carefully separating and recycling was being shipped from Dublin to Essex to be burned in an RDF plant.  Mmmm, environmentally sound.

Quote from: The Cosh on 12 March, 2011, 05:41:39 PM
My reaction would probably have been to simply dump the box of rubbish in the path in front of them and walk off.

Yes, me too.  I fear CF is mellowing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 12 March, 2011, 10:31:03 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 12 March, 2011, 05:41:39 PM
My reaction would probably have been to simply dump the box of rubbish in the path in front of them and walk off.

That would have been quite funny, and logical too, seeing as they were blocking CF's path and they would have had to go back in the direction of the cardboard skip anyway; they might as well have taken his rubbish with them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 13 March, 2011, 04:53:50 PM
i'm in a very angry mood this weekend dunno if its cos ive not taken my tabs for a while but ive been taking it out on the two people i love the most ...i'm a bad grumpy man. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 13 March, 2011, 05:21:12 PM
This is my second grumpy weekend in a row and I'm taking it out on the people I love the most too. It's their fault that I'm so grumpy though, so tough titties to them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 16 March, 2011, 05:44:00 PM
my wife got caught speeding for the first time so rather than the £60 fine and points she opting for the awareness course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 17 March, 2011, 07:34:44 AM
I fell down the last couple of stairs at home yesterday and landed on my back. I thought I had got away with it as I felt OK after catching my breath but I woke up this morning feeling like I've been hit by a bus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 March, 2011, 08:52:49 AM
Time to think about that stair-lift, Rog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 17 March, 2011, 09:05:08 AM
It's 9am and I'm sitting in a 'training centre' being told tyhe correct way to type a letter.

Where to put the date, your name, their name etc. Even, and I swear this is what they are talking about right now as I type, the correct way to space the digits in your mobile no.  Because if they aren't spaced correctly the recipient will throw your letter straight in the bin. No second chances.

This may be the single dullest morning of my life and it's barely started.

Hang on, she's coming over...

Phew, seems I have typed my number correctly. Gold star for me then.

Kill me now. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 March, 2011, 01:03:33 PM
Progless for nearly a month now.

I decided to go digital but my PC keeps breaking down (it is old so I'm thinking of moving on).

So I haven't had my fill of toothy goodness for weeks.


Still, at least I'm not having to escort my family out of Bahrain like my little brother is...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 17 March, 2011, 10:33:08 PM
its comic relief tomorrow and working in a school everyone is expected to join in in fact you feel a bigger pratt if your not in fancy dress so i am joining reluctantly in...on the bright side though it is pirate theme  arrrr.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 March, 2011, 12:54:07 AM
Why have I chosen to watch 2 subtitled films when I'm trying to write the next article for my blog today  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 21 March, 2011, 05:06:12 PM
This morning I walked into work to be greeted with the question "what are you doing here? Don't you have the day booked off?" And I checked my diary and had indeed asked for the day off. So it was back on the bus to go home with nothing planned to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 24 March, 2011, 02:03:43 PM
I have just been waylaid in a second hand bookshop by a French man in his sixties, who proceded to tell me over the course of three quarters of an hour, all about how the ancient Babylonians and Assyrians had spacemen as their gods, how the spacemen's 'watches' worked, how their holograms worked, how it impacted upon their battle plans, why they carried handbags (force fields, apparently) and how this is all backed up in historical record.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Brigantian on 24 March, 2011, 10:25:26 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 24 March, 2011, 02:03:43 PM
I have just been waylaid in a second hand bookshop by a French man in his sixties, who proceded to tell me over the course of three quarters of an hour, all about how the ancient Babylonians and Assyrians had spacemen as their gods, how the spacemen's 'watches' worked, how their holograms worked, how it impacted upon their battle plans, why they carried handbags (force fields, apparently) and how this is all backed up in historical record.

SBT
Sounds like you encountred a Sitchinite. Quite fond of Zach's books myself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 March, 2011, 09:52:04 AM
Quote from: Brigantian on 24 March, 2011, 10:25:26 PM
Sounds like you encountred a Sitchinite. Quite fond of Zach's books myself.

He claimed to have formed these theories "in 1964", and has suffered "decades of ridicule" as a result. Also claimed to have met Isaac Asimov in the seventies and spoken to him about them. He was very serious, but amusing, and owned the shop; so wasn't just a random loon.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 March, 2011, 11:19:35 AM
I slipped and fell downstairs, knocking a picture off the wall which smacked me in the head, and have injured my back, my arm and my ankle as a result. Oh BONKERS! (as my youngest son would say).

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 25 March, 2011, 11:32:16 AM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 17 March, 2011, 09:05:08 AM
It's 9am and I'm sitting in a 'training centre' being told tyhe correct way to type a letter.

Where to put the date, your name, their name etc. Even, and I swear this is what they are talking about right now as I type, the correct way to space the digits in your mobile no.

You have to space them???  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 25 March, 2011, 02:39:34 PM
I have spent the morning being irradiated at the local hospital's X-ray department.

Fear that I now have a healthy glow.

Would make a Japan joke, but don't want to offend anyone.

Want folks to know I could've though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 March, 2011, 05:36:13 PM
Ever tried looking on an image library for a simple straight forward photo? I just need an image of a business man standing looking towards the camera but almost every photographer under the sun seems to think that people only ever need novelty photos. What a bunch of idiots.

Back to work now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 25 March, 2011, 06:36:50 PM
In what is the latest episode in a long series of me eating stupidly spicy things when drunk, I agreed to try one of the worlds hottest chilli sauce's last night.

I am paying dearly for it today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Brigantian on 26 March, 2011, 12:55:26 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 25 March, 2011, 09:52:04 AM
Quote from: Brigantian on 24 March, 2011, 10:25:26 PM
Sounds like you encountred a Sitchinite. Quite fond of Zach's books myself.

He claimed to have formed these theories "in 1964", and has suffered "decades of ridicule" as a result. Also claimed to have met Isaac Asimov in the seventies and spoken to him about them. He was very serious, but amusing, and owned the shop; so wasn't just a random loon.

SBT
Is it a specialist bookshop -eg occult and other weirdness ? Where in this blessed land might it be located ? Also sorry to hear you fell down the stairs but I'm sure I'm not the only to be amused by your pain. You've spread a little joy. Is laughter really the best medicine ? Yup, I feel better, it must be. Thanks Doc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 26 March, 2011, 02:48:38 AM
because my keyboard is fucked. but, i did write an amazing song today. but not "your red china pussy made me blue" ,unfortunately, yap-shop friends.

Plus, as i was reading 'shakara' in this week's prog, everytime i read 'godwave', my brain [such as it is] read 'godpletonwave', which was quite un-nerving.

also,it's taken me at least 15 minutes to write this totallly pointless post with my screwed keyboard. it's friday night - what the fuck?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 26 March, 2011, 09:56:13 AM
Quote from: Brigantian on 26 March, 2011, 12:55:26 AM
Is it a specialist bookshop -eg occult and other weirdness ? Where in this blessed land might it be located ? Also sorry to hear you fell down the stairs but I'm sure I'm not the only to be amused by your pain. You've spread a little joy. Is laughter really the best medicine ? Yup, I feel better, it must be. Thanks Doc.

Heh- no, it's an "antiquarian bookshop" in London Road, St Leonards-On-Sea. One of those fantastic places that has teeny tiny walkways shovelled between cliff-faces of books always in danger of sliding down upon you. Like most of them, the owner seems to have forgotten that people actually need to be able to touch the books without them cascading down. I love places like that.

The last time I went in there, about twenty years ago, I was told by a different man that the books I wanted "would never be in here" because he "only sold collectible and antiquarian volumes", all the while looking at me like I was a piece of poo. Twenty years later, it's got a fairly big sci-fi/ horror section, walls of Beano annuals and a pleasantly mad owner.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 March, 2011, 08:14:28 PM
After getting an email stating that I'm £165 in credit with EON, today I get a letter saying that they are going to increase my direct debit.
Come Monday I shall be on the phone to these twats to have a polite conversation  >:D

Does no fucker in this country do their job properly apart from me  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 26 March, 2011, 08:26:53 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 25 March, 2011, 11:32:16 AM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 17 March, 2011, 09:05:08 AM
It's 9am and I'm sitting in a 'training centre' being told tyhe correct way to type a letter.

Where to put the date, your name, their name etc. Even, and I swear this is what they are talking about right now as I type, the correct way to space the digits in your mobile no.

You have to space them???  :o

Oh yes. Because the human brain is so accustomed to the landline method of 5-3-3 that if you simply put all of the digits together, without spaces, the person reading the letter CAN NOT RECOGNISE THEM AS A PHONE NUMBER. This is apparently a FACT, proven by science.

I tell you, that place is absolute torture on the tongue, the amount of time I spend biting it. Oh for the last day, when my benefits no longer rely on their good will.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 March, 2011, 09:03:36 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 26 March, 2011, 08:26:53 PM
Oh yes. Because the human brain is so accustomed to the landline method of 5-3-3 that if you simply put all of the digits together, without spaces, the person reading the letter CAN NOT RECOGNISE THEM AS A PHONE NUMBER. This is apparently a FACT, proven by science.

How are shooting sprees as rare as they are?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 26 March, 2011, 09:22:30 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 March, 2011, 08:14:28 PM
After getting an email stating that I'm £165 in credit with EON, today I get a letter saying that they are going to increase my direct debit.
Come Monday I shall be on the phone to these twats to have a polite conversation  >:D

EON are constantly trying it on with me in the winter....."your consumption has increased so we will increase your direct debits" and every year i have to phone them and point out that i use less in the summer and it all evens out. they never call at the hiegt of summer to say that im using less and would i like to pay less. Strange that :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 27 March, 2011, 04:06:42 PM
Because I've just been walking around town, in and out of shops, even saw a hot grl I work with...all the while unaware I had a chocalate button smear down my shirt. A brown one.... :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 March, 2011, 04:12:29 PM
Ha! That's nothing- nothing, i say! i once left my flat in dublin on a sunny day, wandered into town, went to several shops, had a drink in a nice pub, spent a pleasant morning all told, then went to meet my wife (then my girlfriend) from work, only for her to notice i had a pair of her bright pink panties stuck to the velcro strap of my new rock boot.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 27 March, 2011, 04:30:21 PM
Quote from: Emp on 26 March, 2011, 09:22:30 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 March, 2011, 08:14:28 PM
After getting an email stating that I'm £165 in credit with EON, today I get a letter saying that they are going to increase my direct debit.
Come Monday I shall be on the phone to these twats to have a polite conversation  >:D

EON are constantly trying it on with me in the winter....."your consumption has increased so we will increase your direct debits" and every year i have to phone them and point out that i use less in the summer and it all evens out. they never call at the hiegt of summer to say that im using less and would i like to pay less. Strange that :)

They're all trying it on.

Last Saturday, I received a bill from British Gas for £230 just a month after paying the winter gas bill. They claimed to have read the meter on Thursday the 10th (unlikely as I was in work and I am the sole occupant of my house) though instead of reading the meter they apparently picked a number at random from the phone book and put that down.

Surprised to find that they didn't deny that their meter reading was probably made up and they took the correct reading over the phone.

Still had to pay £23 about two months before it was due.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Paul faplad Finch on 27 March, 2011, 05:08:13 PM
Many moons ago I was sitting in my house when a knock at the door heralded the arrival of a slightly oily looking young man with a clipboard.

He explained that he and his colleagues were going door to door, explaining to residents about new government legislation which had just come into effect to tackle the dodgy billing methods of many energy companies. He proceeded to show me lots of charts and things, very quickly and without much in the way of comprehensible explanation, and then asked me to sign something so they had a record of my having been informed.

I know, I know, but I was very young and just getting the hang of having my own place and dealing with that kind of thing. So I signed.

A week later I get a letter from an energy company, thanking me for choosing tyo switch to them and informing me of the date they would be taking over my service, etc.  It didn't take me long to figure out what had happened and I was straight on the phone to them.

I expected a big production but no, the person on the line accepted what I said, apologised for 'the confusion' and assured me that the changeover procedure would be cancelled.

Wasn't until I hung up that I realised her complete lack of surprise probably meant that this was a regular thing for them. Presumably they try this kind of thing in the hopes that enough people won't cotton on, or won't complain when they do, that they'll grab a few new customers. I'd imagine some people would be too embarrassed to admit they'd fallen for it.

Have to admire the gall though, of using fake legislation against cons as a cover for their own con.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 March, 2011, 05:22:04 PM
Quote from: Paul faplad Finch on 27 March, 2011, 05:08:13 PM
I expected a big production but no, the person on the line accepted what I said, apologised for 'the confusion' and assured me that the changeover procedure would be cancelled.

Wasn't until I hung up that I realised her complete lack of surprise probably meant that this was a regular thing for them.
It was. Certainly during the big push towards full deregulation of the energy market in the mid to late nineties. Every company that could get into the market had squads of people chapping doors, telling lies and forging signatures for all they worth. Obviously, there were a lot of people who really did want to switch, but there were a hell of a lot who got bumped across in the same way you did because it helped somebody's sales figures and bonus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 March, 2011, 08:54:32 AM
Sneck! i forgot my glasses in the rush to leave this morning. As a result everything's blurry.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 March, 2011, 02:43:19 PM
Just finished on the phone to the nice lady at EON. Even she was confused as to why this had happened but we all know why don't we folks, grab more money off customers who don't check anything!

Instead of raising my direct debit by £7 a month, she said they can lower it by £8 but I said leave it as it is, as then I have a buffer zone as you never know what might happen due to 'cough' climate change  :lol:

When we arrived at the £165 credit being placed into my bank, she was starting to say that they couldn't do this. That was til I butted in and informed her that the company has to refund my money, by LAW!

Anyway it should be in the bank by Friday  :D

Always check everything folks!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 28 March, 2011, 07:05:42 PM
that should pay for some new Dredd tat collectibles   ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 09:29:29 AM
I'm having a colonoscopy tomorrow and cannot eat after 9am today. I don't usually do breakfast, I'm never hungry first thing in the morning, but I've just got up early to stuff as much chicken, potatoes, toast and eggs down my gullet as I can. THink I may go back to bed for a bit now. Looking forward to the delights of a strong laxative this evening!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 March, 2011, 10:34:53 AM
Speaking of unpleasant arse-related procedures, every time I see Greg Land's art on Uncanny X-Men I just can't believe that he still gets work.  Does anyone like those bizarrely static perspective-free montages of barely painted-over photos?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 11:22:36 AM
Right, excuse me while I rant.

I am currently, while typing, watching some godawful reality programme on channel 5 about Brighton beach. It may be called 'Brighton Beach', but I really don't care.

Why do fucking jobsworth little Hitlers take jobs like those protrayed in the programme? Beach Patrol, for instance. In this particular episode, it's a bit windy, so the sea's a bit rough. The squat little nazi in charge of the Beach Patrol is overcome with excitement at the presence of cameras, and rushes down to the beach to order some swimmers out of the water. Gail Porter, on voice over duty, tells us "the red flag has been put up, and it's a stupid risk to swim". hang on a minute. Is it illegal? Don't people have a right to take a few risks- even ones that may end their lives? I don't remember the last programme I watched about mountain climbers having a portentious voice over tutting and declaring it a stupid risk to climb. Nor when the obviously unfit and unprepared celebrities go into the jungle for I'm A Celebrity and then get ill. No, that's funny or dramatic isn't it.

Anyway... little Hitler thinks she can see one of the swimmers "waving". "Yes, that's definately a wave of distress" she cries and orders one of her overweight British baywatch excuses into the water to perform a daring rescue. Oh, but fuck me, the swimmer wasn't in distress at all, and after being pulled back to the shore, tells her so. "Well, don't raise your arms while swimming!" she then lectures. What? WHAT? How does that make any sense whatsoever?

That bit's over now, and we are with the Police Community Support, as they go about harrassing innocents and trying to justify their camera-time.

I'm going to have a little lay down now. I fucking HATE Britian.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 02:12:41 PM
Yeah NAZIS! Next time I'm at the beach and don't notice the warning flag, I hope those FASCIST BULLYBOYS will just stop trampling all over my human rights and let me drown like a free Englishman. Risking death 'cos you're a moron isn't a crime, you JOBSWORTH SCUM!

Oh, for a return to these days, when England was a free country!: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBc02FPSvXc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBc02FPSvXc)

Oh and TB ... nice segue!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 02:46:48 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 02:12:41 PM
Yeah NAZIS! Next time I'm at the beach and don't notice the warning flag, I hope those FASCIST BULLYBOYS will just stop trampling all over my human rights and let me drown like a free Englishman. Risking death 'cos you're a moron isn't a crime, you JOBSWORTH SCUM!

Oh, for a return to these days, when England was a free country!: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBc02FPSvXc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBc02FPSvXc)

Oh and TB ... nice segue!

DDD, swimming while the sea's a bit rough isn't being a "moron", it's FINE! (as David Mitchell might say). What IS being a "moron" is 'mistaking' people who have just watched you stick a red flag up because you're being filmed, then WAVING AT THE CAMERA and shouting "oo-woo!", for drowning swimmers, and forcibly removing them from the sea against their will. And then, when they tell you they were fine (which it looked like they were doing all the way back to shore), trying to tell them off because you're on tv and need to justify your approach to your job.

She was a fucking disgrace of a human being.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 02:50:50 PM
I didn't take into account the "people-acting-like-cocks-cos-they're-on-reality-telly' factor.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 02:52:37 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 02:50:50 PM
I didn't take into account the "people-acting-like-cocks-cos-they're-on-reality-telly' factor.  :D

DOES THIS MEAN I AM RIGHT??? SAY IT DOES OR I WILL FIGHT YOU!!!!

;)

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 04:10:51 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 02:52:37 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 02:50:50 PM
I didn't take into account the "people-acting-like-cocks-cos-they're-on-reality-telly' factor.  :D

DOES THIS MEAN I AM RIGHT??? SAY IT DOES OR I WILL FIGHT YOU!!!!

;)

SBT

Not until I get some sympathy for my starvation and bum-camera ordeal. And it's not just a bum-camera, it's a bum-camera that can CUT THINGS OFF if it don't like the look of 'em!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 04:16:01 PM
You have my sympathy. My friend had that done, and they played the live feed on a screen he could see. He said he kept expecting Tom Baker's face to come zooming up the tunnel.
Although, come to think of it, that may have been when he had a camera forced down his jap's eye.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 29 March, 2011, 04:54:07 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 04:16:01 PM
Tom Baker's face to come zooming up the tunnel
SBT

I think Tom would like that!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 29 March, 2011, 07:31:17 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 29 March, 2011, 04:54:07 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 March, 2011, 04:16:01 PM
Tom Baker's face to come zooming up the tunnel
SBT

I think Tom would like that!


glad it wasnt just me thinking the dr who theme to try and belay the pain...ddd, go for sedation no matterwhat it aint pleasant and the gas and air dont cut it especialy when they find a tricky bit... oh and the moviprep is vile! i didnt drink  both sachets (didnt atually need to ouch!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 29 March, 2011, 07:58:19 PM
Finish work for 5 days and thought it would be a good chance to relax, do some reading and generally do a whole lot of nothing.
Unfortunatlry the house next to me has been sold and people are in ripping it to bits so they can remodernise it.As it is i'm just waiting for a drill bit to appear above the monitor.

So much for a quiet few days ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 29 March, 2011, 09:49:17 PM
A day's work in a supermarket: £50
A day's work providing cover, not teaching, as a supply teacher: £50
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 09:52:02 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 29 March, 2011, 07:31:17 PM
oh and the moviprep is vile! i didnt drink  both sachets (didnt atually need to ouch!!!

Tell me about it - I'm just chugging the last glass of my two litres of the disgusting stuff and it's like Niagara Falls round the back. In the leaflet it says "go to bed when you stop going to the toilet for example at 11 o'clock"  note: it doesn't say you will stop by 11 o'clock!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 30 March, 2011, 10:23:23 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 09:52:02 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 29 March, 2011, 07:31:17 PM
oh and the moviprep is vile! i didnt drink  both sachets (didnt atually need to ouch!!!

Tell me about it - I'm just chugging the last glass of my two litres of the disgusting stuff and it's like Niagara Falls round the back. In the leaflet it says "go to bed when you stop going to the toilet for example at 11 o'clock"  note: it doesn't say you will stop by 11 o'clock!

That's easily the worst part, trying to drink that stuff without puking! I was wretching with every mouthful. I'd bought a can of Fanta and just looked at it every now and then so I knew I had a nice tasty reward at the end.

The actual bumcam ordeal isn't too bad, if they hit a rough patch it can be pretty sore (like really intense trapped wind) but that doesn't last long. Plus the drugs are absolutely fantastic, I'm sure I was watching the screen and babbling something about making an FMV videogame where you have to 'open all the bumdoors'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 30 March, 2011, 12:02:10 PM
Its cheered me up knowing I'm NOT getting this in the near future!!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 March, 2011, 12:25:51 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 30 March, 2011, 12:02:10 PM
Its cheered me up knowing I'm NOT getting this in the near future!!  :D

Yes indeed.  I'm adding this to my Reverse-Bucket List, along with felching and Eat Pray Love.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 30 March, 2011, 06:16:15 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2011, 09:52:02 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 29 March, 2011, 07:31:17 PM
oh and the moviprep is vile! i didnt drink  both sachets (didnt atually need to ouch!!!

Tell me about it - I'm just chugging the last glass of my two litres of the disgusting stuff and it's like Niagara Falls round the back. In the leaflet it says "go to bed when you stop going to the toilet for example at 11 o'clock"  note: it doesn't say you will stop by 11 o'clock!

heh, i was still at it half an hour before the procedure!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 30 March, 2011, 06:20:28 PM
...oh and minor impediment is mini came home with a rash yesterday we thought it was insect bites as shes started a mini beast club at school which involves crawling in bushes looking for insects...but the wife has broke out today so a trip to the dr has revealed chicken pox... thats 3 times shes had it now and mrs mog has had it before so its looking like she might be shingly... this on top of a wierd do of her blood pressure plummeting and her heart rate racing causing her to collapse last week (mini did a sterling job looking after mummy gave her a pillow and took her temp and phoned nanna) shes had to have an ecg and a chest xray today....

impediments? check
procession? oh yes!

just hope its not me next a) just gone back after a couple of days off for puking
                          b) a colleague has just gotten pregnant after her and her hubby have been going hell for leather with ivf....

itchy...scratchy....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 31 March, 2011, 08:19:20 AM
Well the bum-cam was a fuss over nothing. The fasting and laxative were by far the worst part. The hospital was like a swish hotel and the sedative knocked me right out. That's the 2nd minor procedure I've had recently under sedation and both times I was out like a light - maybe my brain's just accustomed to slipping easilly into a drug-induceed amnesiac stupour!

They even gave me a souvenir photo of my colon to take home, which I now have 2 weeks to fret over ("should that bit look like that? Is that colour normal?") until I get my results.

Sorry to hear about the spotty family Mogz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 March, 2011, 08:58:25 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 31 March, 2011, 08:19:20 AM
The fasting and laxative were by far the worst part.

You know what they say:  the bottom falls out of your world when the world falls out of your bottom. 

Best of luck with the results, DDD. 

And Mogz - that sounds poxy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 31 March, 2011, 07:16:08 PM
the little mite started up chucking today so mrs rang the dr and the dr said no more monkeys bounc...no wait.... " we'll have to see her in the car as shes infectious"

  so fucking patient dignity and confidentiality are out the fucking window cos shes 5 is it? consultations in car parks eh? what if my wife didnt drive? on tuesday they were made to wait in a corridor as it was which upset mini mogz no end...

i feel a complaint to the trust coming on even the two pregnant nurses werent worried about me possibly being a carrier today so why does a dr think he can treat my family like lepers?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 31 March, 2011, 08:25:01 PM
For Fucks Sake!

I had written about 90% of a rather long email to someone, with reference to a future commission and I decided that I needed a coke, so I popped into the kitchen to get one. As I returned to the computer I heard Sam say "Hotmail" and when I looked at the screen, he had deleted the whole bloody thing  >:(

It's a good job I love the little sod  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 01 April, 2011, 12:16:43 AM
Some twit upstairs or downstairs has a voice like a fucking foghorn.

On the go headphones and I sleep with earplugs every night.

God, when can we get out of this flat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 April, 2011, 09:25:24 AM
Because our interior door's catch jammed this morning, five minutes before school. Meaning we couldnt get out of the house, without climbing out the front window. And now i have managed, flukily, to open it, so ive got the handies and mechanism off (scraping off fifty years of paint to do so) so i have to replace that today. Arses!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 01 April, 2011, 09:32:10 AM
Becuase in Windows 7 you can't just receive a file via Bluetooth, you have to select a menu option saying "Recieve a File". Kind of defeats the purpose if you ask me, and took me an hour and a half to figure out. Grr...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 April, 2011, 01:28:50 PM
Because middle age hit hard today, as i was walking around the underwear section of a department store with my wife and found myself sporting an engorged member. Oh dear.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 01 April, 2011, 03:28:21 PM
Well... on the plus side, I've heard the older you get, the harder it is to get.. well... harder. (That looked more like a teenage reaction to me!)

Not speaking from experience of course. (Spending a life of almost celibate singleness seems to create laws of it's own.)

Slightly miffed that I put my glasses down somewhere last night and now I can't find them. Not that big a deal, I suppose,  I can get by without them. Makes watching the telly a nuisance though.  My glasses case isn't in my jacket pocket and that thing's quite big and stands out. It's if they're outside...the whole metal frame thing renders them almost invisible.

And I can't try phoning them like I would my mobile. (Mind went to a silly place there!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 01 April, 2011, 05:35:40 PM
Because my one year old daughter has started removing her own nappy, usually just after she does a poo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 01 April, 2011, 07:07:35 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 01 April, 2011, 05:35:40 PM
Because my one year old daughter has started removing her own nappy, usually just after she does a poo.

Ours started doing that around then (12 years ago)..  not the nicest phase it must be said.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 01 April, 2011, 07:20:35 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 01 April, 2011, 01:28:50 PM
Because middle age hit hard today, as i was walking around the underwear section of a department store with my wife and found myself sporting an engorged member. Oh dear.
SBT

I can see three things in that sentence to be chuffed about, think yourself lucky!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 April, 2011, 09:51:15 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 01 April, 2011, 05:35:40 PM
Because my one year old daughter has started removing her own nappy, usually just after she does a poo.

Well when else would she want to do it?  :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 April, 2011, 12:55:53 AM
I'm on the outskirts of SBT's town with supplies to feed him and his family and there is a crash blocking the road off.
No fatalities but an impressive crash still.
It looks like I will be here a while and the nice policeman said he would wake me when the road is clear.
Night, night everybody!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 April, 2011, 12:58:32 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 April, 2011, 12:55:53 AM
I'm on the outskirts of SBT's town with supplies to feed him and his family

You have a consignment of nipple tassels and horror videos?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 02 April, 2011, 01:00:25 AM
Not an impediment as such,more a mile round trip to get a better look and irony.

A house close to me has been sealed of and the forensic peeps involed. Been sealed up like a ducks arse for 2 days. Passing it today the wife (whose a bit of a crime nutter)..just had to go past it about 3 times to check it out.

turns out its a suspected bomb factory.....the irony is i'm from Norn Iron and thats the closest i've come to such a thing(far as i know) :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 April, 2011, 08:13:18 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 01 April, 2011, 09:51:15 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 01 April, 2011, 05:35:40 PM
Because my one year old daughter has started removing her own nappy, usually just after she does a poo.

Well when else would she want to do it?  :rolleyes:

It's not entirely restricted to when she's done a poo, she's quite the little naturist and can strip off faster than Superman can change in a phone box the second you take your eye off her. But couple that with her ability to do virtually odourless stealth poo's and things can get very messy, very quickly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 08 April, 2011, 09:36:19 PM
Because I've just dropped my almost finished bag of prawn crackers on the floor and now the carpet of the library is covered in a coating of fine crumbs.  I think I'll wait until I need to go make another cuppa before getting the hoover.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 08 April, 2011, 09:50:47 PM
I really cant feel upset for a man with his own library :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 08 April, 2011, 10:00:01 PM
It's somewhere where I can hide from the domestic staff  :).  Actually it's just the former small bedroom, but what else could you call a (10'x7') room with six bookcases and a computer desk (apart from slightly cramped).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 08 April, 2011, 10:02:00 PM
I call it an office(makes me sound like i do some work in it) :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 09 April, 2011, 10:12:51 PM
I am starting to pile on the pounds again. Although during the day at work I don't eat anything when I get home I have a hearty dinner and tend to snack till I go bed. I know I am doing it but cant be bothered to halt or cut down the snacking.
Ah well, I have just eaten a packet of Pom Bear prawn cocktail (The Teddy Shaped Potato Snack) and about to chomp on some peanut butter sandwiches. Then its off for a few hours of Star Wars Lego on the PS3 before bed. See you in the morning when either Robbie or Sophie drag me out of bed at 6.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 10 April, 2011, 10:37:26 AM
I had my first experience of actual teaching this past week. I've taken groups on jolly geologizing trips plenty, but the groups are generally interested adults not students who are supposed to learn something.

The last lecture was on Thursday afternoon. Some of the students were actually asleep, bless their little loans. Now, either I have a pleasantly sonorous speaking voice, they had no interest in the exciting topic at hand or they're working too hard. Hmmm...

The real minor impediment is that I've now a pile of work to mark.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 April, 2011, 02:35:43 PM
Had a bank statement this morning and as strange as it was for me, I had no money in my current account.
I then looked at the account number and it's not mine but why my name??????

Best I pop in on Wednesday and drop this off with them saying 'Get back to me explaining what's gone wrong in a letter and I won't be paying for that' obviously my time is money and I won't hang around for those twats  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 April, 2011, 10:21:52 PM
After nearly 9 years of reliable service, my Nokia 6310i today fell under the remorseless tracks of a bulldozer and perished utterly, proving, if proof was needed, that time spent stitching a hole in my work jeans pocket would have been time well spent, regardless of the weather at the weekend.  Interestingly its immediate predecessor, some Ericsson thing I'd had from 1997 to 2002, expired almost exactly the same way (it was crushed a 360 degree excavator, but the principle of the holey pocket remains the same).  And so the search for Phone Number 3 begins, although as my budget is €0.00, I suspect it'll be whatever leftover I can cadge from family or friends.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 12 April, 2011, 07:33:14 PM
Failed utterly (again) to organise a piss up in a brewery so am sat in The Drum & Monkey nursing a pint of Peroni feeling sorry for myself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 12 April, 2011, 07:46:21 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 12 April, 2011, 07:33:14 PM
Failed utterly (again) to organise a piss up in a brewery so am sat in The Drum & Monkey nursing a pint of Peroni feeling sorry for myself.

In Glasgow? If I wasn't stuck at work being miserable I'd have popped in to feel sorry for you too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 12 April, 2011, 08:24:20 PM
Yeah. Am on my way home now though.

And I was shit at 5-a-side (despite a couple of goals and a great save). Only some cheese based snacking, a large whisky, an episode of Star Trek or a blow job can cheer me up now. 

(I'm a realist though so 3 out of 4 will do) 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 12 April, 2011, 09:00:56 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4vXFB0J4cM&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4vXFB0J4cM&feature=related)

Wee beggar somehow managed to trip a trap without getting caught
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 April, 2011, 10:30:19 PM
My graphics card packed up over the weekend and I had to order a new one. While the upgrade is nice it couldn't have come at a worse time financially, but I can't afford to be without my PC.

To make matters worse I spent hours tonight trying to get the new one working, the PC wouldn't boot after I fitted it because I had unseated a stick of ram while I was tidying up the power cables inside the case  :-[.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 April, 2011, 11:03:02 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 12 April, 2011, 07:46:21 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 12 April, 2011, 07:33:14 PM
Failed utterly (again) to organise a piss up in a brewery so am sat in The Drum & Monkey nursing a pint of Peroni feeling sorry for myself.
In Glasgow? If I wasn't stuck at work being miserable I'd have popped in to feel sorry for you too.
And if I'd only read this post before heading home from the bus station I'd've stopped off for a swift half.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 13 April, 2011, 07:31:09 PM
Finally got the wee bastard of a mouse that forced me to throw out an entire cupboard's worth of food. Unfortunately, the mouse trap didn't actually trap him, it just mortally wounded him. Imagine my delight when I got home from work to discover he'd trailed blood all over the kitchen floor. It looks like a Tarantino film in there. If Tarantino made a film about rodents.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 14 April, 2011, 05:48:25 PM
My car is poorly and I was waiting in this morning for a hire car to be delivered.

I bolted downstairs to the door when the bell rang, thinking that it had arrived, only to be greeted by a gaggle of glassy eyed, grinning Jehovah's witnesses who ended up forcing me to be to be impolite by not taking the hint that they were about as welcome as a turd in a swimming pool.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 15 April, 2011, 09:02:08 PM
I got a message from a company so called 'ELT' the other day. I found it in my spam box, but it sounded promising being home based office work. I replied to it and I was sent another mail yesterday offering me a job on a one month trial basis.

It looked good, but I was a bit suspicious. The wages offered looked way too good for part time work (more than I used to earn as a Software Engineer but that was back in 2001). I was seriously considering returning the form with my details anyway, but I did a search for the company on the web first. (They didn't include a web-site link on their letter.)

Turns out it was a scam.

Still, better to learn now rather than later. So maybe this isn't really an impediment as I'm not really any worse off than I was before. Kind of relieved really, at least I know.

If you get a message from a company called ELM or ELT offering Administration/Sales work, delete it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 17 April, 2011, 09:45:23 AM
A major impediment really. While browsing the forum yesterday afternoon I got a page saying I was BANNED! Innocent little me, surely not.  :o

Many thanks to Richmond Clements and Emperor for sorting it out. It's good to be back
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 17 April, 2011, 11:15:53 AM
Because for the first time in nearly a decade I have no beard of any kind whatsoever. Shaved it all off on a whim last night- but not before amusing my family with the inbetweeny stages of "handlebar gay biker", "old man/ slug balancer" and "Hitler".

Now I am completely clean shaven. And I don't like it. The regrowth starts here!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 18 April, 2011, 07:25:31 PM
I believe I mentioned in this thread (at least I think it was this one...) a while back about a certain friend of a friend who calls herself an 'illustrator', and an 'artist', despite that fact she has zero talent, and that her entire portfolio is simply pictures of celebrities scanned in from fashion magazines, which she then crudely doodles over and applies various filters to in Photoshop. I always have to bite my tongue when people fawn over her work - and even buy prints from her. To be frank, I consider it an insult to real hardworking illustrators.

Well, I have an update - following an exhibition of 'her' 'work', she has been threatened with legal action by representatives of one of the celebrities whose image she used without permission.

While I genuinely hope that nothing more than a simple cease and desist comes of this, I can't deny that I felt a huge surge of satisfaction on hearing the news.

Does that make me a bad person?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 April, 2011, 07:27:38 PM
No, you should be laughing and pointing at her, the thieving cow  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 18 April, 2011, 07:34:00 PM
Quote from: radiator on 18 April, 2011, 07:25:31 PM
I believe I mentioned in this thread (at least I think it was this one...) a while back about a certain friend of a friend who calls herself an 'illustrator', and an 'artist', despite that fact she has zero talent, and that her entire portfolio is simply pictures of celebrities scanned in from fashion magazines, which she then crudely doodles over and applies various filters to in Photoshop. I always have to bite my tongue when people fawn over her work - and even buy prints from her. To be frank, I consider it an insult to real hardworking illustrators.

Well, I have an update - following an exhibition of 'her' 'work', she has been threatened with legal action by representatives of one of the celebrities whose image she used without permission.

While I genuinely hope that nothing more than a simple cease and desist comes of this, I can't deny that I felt a huge surge of satisfaction on hearing the news.

Does that make me a bad person?

Shouldn't this be known as 'Pulling a Robert Granito' these days? I don't think you're a bad person.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 18 April, 2011, 07:43:55 PM
I should stress that this is most definitely not Warholesque artistic, deliberate, satirical re-appropriation of celebrity images - this is literally typing a celebrities name into Google Images, nabbing the first image you find, dicking around with it in Photoshop, and passing it off as an original piece of art.

What makes it worse it that the photos she uses aren't stock shots, they are generally posed portraits from magazine shoots, so she's ripping off the photographer, the publication and the celebrity themselves, as well as the person she is selling the 'artwork' to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 18 April, 2011, 07:47:37 PM
Quote from: radiator on 18 April, 2011, 07:25:31 PMDoes that make me a bad person?

Yes, but if we're ever at the same dinner party please sit next to me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 18 April, 2011, 08:24:14 PM
I can see many holiday problems at work over the next month or so.

We've all voted on 5 different shift pattern changes and two are surging ahead. This all ended over two weeks ago and still we have no idea which won and what shifts we have. The problem is that all the changes take place on the day of the Royal Wedding, as our place shuts down for the day.

Well I have had to put holidays in for Demoncon and Judge Minty filming in May. The thing is, instead of putting 4 days in I only had to put 1 in, as we can move rest days about, thus enabling us to save as much holiday as we can.

Obviously with the changes coming I need to know what the hell is going on, as I'm gonna have to alter the holidays and rest dates as it's all gonna change.

I can see a LOT of angry people if it ain't sorted soon!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 18 April, 2011, 10:46:40 PM
....turns out it was just a C&D, but now she's bleating on facebook about how unfair it all is, claiming that she only used the original image for 'taking inspiration and paying homage', that she creates her images 'from scratch' (lie),  and providing links to an article that discusses the rights and wrongs of comic artists who do take commissions to draw licensed characters as if that situation bears one iota of resemblance to her own.

Seriously having to force myself not to chime in with a comment to the effect of: "I'm on the movie people's side!".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 April, 2011, 06:59:55 PM
After 6 weeks of email tennis with senior management and our logistics department, I finally convinced them that I had a business case to replace my five year old safety shoes (even though I am supposed to get a new pair every six months).

I think it was me threatening to go to a customer review meeting in my slippers that finally tipped the balance in my favour.

They insisted on ordering them for me, they even chose them. I got home today to find a package on my doorstep containing a pair of safety trainers that I can't wear because they don't comply with the company dress code. Twats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 21 April, 2011, 07:12:03 PM
We were supposed to be supporting Sprinbok Nude Girls next month but they've cancelled the tour. Dunno why. I'd never actually heard of them but they're a South African band and our bassist is from that neck of the woods and a big fan so he was pretty pumped about it. We'd sold a few tickets for it so now we'll have to refund people. Annoying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 22 April, 2011, 04:15:01 PM
I've been learning the piano for three weeks now & I've only managed to progress from 'drunk gorilla wearing boxing-gloves' standard to 'sober gorilla wearing boxing gloves' standard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 22 April, 2011, 06:42:10 PM
Pops: 2
Mice: 0

(yes, yes they do shat themselves when they die)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 22 April, 2011, 08:29:00 PM
Quote from: pops1983 on 22 April, 2011, 06:42:10 PM
Pops: 2
Mice: 0

(yes, yes they do shat themselves when they die)
We have one scratching away behind (in) the living room wall as I type. We had a lot of the bleedres a few years ago, but none since. Looks like it's time to reset the traps!  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 23 April, 2011, 09:54:51 AM
I've burnt my hand on my own breakfast.  :-[ Even my breakfast is against me. I scoffed the bacon and eggs and yummy fried bread anyway so it wasn't wasted. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 April, 2011, 01:33:04 PM
Today, i went up to the archive to return some progs that i'd taken to work the other day. While putting them back, i found- shock, gasp!- a whole batch missing! panic! turned the archive upside down looking for them... Only to discover them, twenty stressful minutes later, on the bed. Where i'd put them. When i brought them upstairs to put them back. Yes, it was the same ones.

Arsebiscuits.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 April, 2011, 09:52:01 AM
It's very hard to work with a kitteh on your lap...(!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 April, 2011, 10:31:10 AM
The double bank holiday causes untold woe in hastings, as neither the prog nor the meg appear in the shops today.

Flapcheese.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 27 April, 2011, 12:21:02 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 27 April, 2011, 10:31:10 AM
The double bank holiday causes untold woe in hastings, as neither the prog nor the meg appear in the shops today.

Flapcheese.

SBT

Same here in Middlesbrough  :'( and I went into town especially for them
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 27 April, 2011, 12:32:36 PM
That's what has happened to me in London as well. The WH Smith where I buy the prog never has it until Thursday whenever it's a Bank holiday weekend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 April, 2011, 02:19:39 PM
Thanks for the heads up chaps!
I just rang the Grinning Demon and my stuff is in, which means the I have to get out of bed now  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 27 April, 2011, 03:24:04 PM
Whsmiths in county durham doesnt have this weeks prog or meg in yet :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 28 April, 2011, 04:49:10 PM
One wall in my lounge was starting to look a bit grotty (it's where the kids toys are piled/stored) and knowing I had half a big tub of the paint left I filled and sanded it and prepped it for decorating.

I retrieved the paint from the shed and it's gone weird and smelly and won't mix back together properly. I checked with Wickes and they no longer do it, so I now have to do the whole bloody room in a different colour.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 29 April, 2011, 12:00:13 AM
Thats a general problem with a little painting...you tend to see how grotty everything else is and before long yer redecorating the whole house :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 May, 2011, 09:22:03 PM
Okay, this is just about as minor as impediments get - I've updated to the latest version of Firebox and for some inexplicable reason they've swapped the order of the 'open in new tab' and 'open in new browser widow' options when you right click on a link. So while I usually open lots of tabs and then read them, I keep finding myself pointlessly opening new windows all the time. It's bugging me probably more than it merits.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 02 May, 2011, 09:25:14 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 May, 2011, 09:22:03 PM
Okay, this is just about as minor as impediments get - I've updated to the latest version of Firebox and for some inexplicable reason they've swapped the order of the 'open in new tab' and 'open in new browser widow' options when you right click on a link. So while I usually open lots of tabs and then read them, I keep finding myself pointlessly opening new windows all the time. It's bugging me probably more than it merits.
No. This infuriated me for at least a week after I upgraded.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 02 May, 2011, 09:26:33 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 May, 2011, 09:22:03 PM
Okay, this is just about as minor as impediments get - I've updated to the latest version of Firebox and for some inexplicable reason they've swapped the order of the 'open in new tab' and 'open in new browser widow' options when you right click on a link. So while I usually open lots of tabs and then read them, I keep finding myself pointlessly opening new windows all the time. It's bugging me probably more than it merits.



Click on links with both mouse buttons simultaneously. Opens them in new tabs. Does for me anyways. Doesn't work on the the girlfriends laptop though, so, no guarantees
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 04 May, 2011, 12:59:01 PM
My bro lives in Canada and his girlfriend got him tickets to see Mogwai tomorrow for his birthday. He never managed to see them when he lived in Scotland so it would have been a nice wee taste of home for him, but they've gone and buggering cancelled on him because of Visa problems or summink. Gutted for him, and also I'm now not sure if my present to him (Mogwai live album/dvd) will seem like a nice consolation or a kick in the balls. Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 05 May, 2011, 07:08:05 PM
I managed to drop my crappy mobile onto a train line,the LT staff leapt into action bless 'em and retrieved it after much embarrassed whining from myself.

:-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 06 May, 2011, 12:52:12 AM
2 years I hade them 2 long years ive been meaning to open theas dam toys box and Ive got my back log of stuf out of the way but mum say to wait 13 day till the windows have been replasede so I stupidily say ok what happens the figeres during the house cleaning get put by a door way I trip over hiting the door and the box in qustion is crushed O and heres the kicker its one of thros boxies desined to be used as a display cases if you wish to arrrrrrrr if I had just opened the box then put it into storge with the outher rare emptey boixies this wouldn not have happened but o no it did why does the universes hate me
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 08 May, 2011, 11:33:56 AM
This was due to my 40th birthday weekend and the wife had a lovely stay in a hotel and meal with friends etc planned.  All had to be cancelled as I went down with an absolute stinker of a head cold last Tuesday and am stil not any better.

Looks like a very sober 40th for me tomorrow.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 08 May, 2011, 10:43:02 PM
Thats crap fishy, Ive just wished you a happy one over on the other thread :o

Im starting my three day week tomorror, and have to sign on, I was feeling a bit pissed at it, and for some reason a bit ashamed at having to sign on, no good reason for this I know, I have signed on before, but a long time ago.

Still im looking at the bright side, I have two days off to get things done that I have been meaning to get to, I started the garden today and put in a lazy bed of onions, and I have another 3 beds to put inI now have time to do it, I stripped the strimmer today, and I have the time to buy the parts tomorrow, and I at long last bought the polish for the hall floor, that pencilled for tuesday,
silver linings etc.

David
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 08 May, 2011, 10:44:37 PM
Thanks mad.. nah it's nothing hence me considering it minor.  The good outweighs the bad for sure, its just a grumble.

sorry to hear about your changes but , at the same time, congrats on such a positive approach to it. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 09 May, 2011, 12:03:16 AM
Bah.  An extra £90 on the phone bill this month.  Somebody has been calling 0906 numbers.  It looks a well dodgy loan company out of Stockpart (CDF or Horizon or something).  Nobody in the house owning up to it (yet) - maybe they just got a phone call saying please call this number and fell for it.

Anyway, it's going to be a hassle trying to get the money back from either my crap phone company (pipex - just about impossible to talk to a human) or from this company (mainly because everything I see looks dodgy and I don't want to email them even more personal details in an attempt to get my money back just in case all of teh Helpful web pages are part of a meta-scam).

Either way, it looks like I'll be spending some time on the net and then the phone trying to contcat somebody who really doesn't want to be contacted or to give me back my money.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzillazarus on 15 May, 2011, 11:29:25 AM
had a distinct lack of sleep this weekend ,mini mog woke up around midnight friday night and proceeded to fill her bed with her dinner tea and inbetween snacks drinks etc ...so spent all day washing .then some kids had a majorly loud party further round the eastate but they might as well have been next door it was that loud with screaming shouting etc ...then this morning theres a fucking bouncy castle up!   >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 15 May, 2011, 11:34:02 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 15 May, 2011, 11:29:25 AM
some kids had a majorly loud party further round the eastate but they might as well have been next door it was that loud with screaming shouting etc

Snap! Where I am woke me up at 3AM. It sounds like an old man's grumble but it really is no fucking respect for your neighbours. Why don't some people see this , I do not know!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzillazarus on 15 May, 2011, 11:38:01 AM
Quote from: strontium71 on 15 May, 2011, 11:34:02 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 15 May, 2011, 11:29:25 AM
some kids had a majorly loud party further round the eastate but they might as well have been next door it was that loud with screaming shouting etc

Snap! Where I am woke me up at 3AM. It sounds like an old man's grumble but it really is no fucking respect for your neighbours. Why don't some people see this , I do not know!

i even had a temazepam for my constant insomnia to no avail ended up on the couch til the wife woke me at 4 to let me know theyd shut up...

  i actually wished i'd still had my air rifle i had a perfect sniping position and they wouldnt have heard.... :angel:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 15 May, 2011, 12:25:16 PM
Ha ha I know what you mean about the air rifle - mine was very accurate but I sold it. The temptation to fire one is very strong I have to admit..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzillazarus on 15 May, 2011, 03:09:43 PM
i had a really cheap relum .22 with a slightly bent barrel but i used to go to a disused hospital and shoot old deo cans and could split a twig from 50m or more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 16 May, 2011, 05:16:19 PM
procession's the word,i'm now having a puky virally thing ,feel like crap/lead slept all day and probably pissed the boss off... :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 May, 2011, 09:37:52 PM
Turns out my middle finger is broken after all.

This explains the pain whenever I've tried to grip something tight with my left hand over the past five weeks.  Which I did a lot while laying the slabs around the greenhouse, decorating and tiling the floor of the utility room and taking a sledge hammer to the old woden frame and canopy outside the back door.

Oh well. I have some exercises to help it get better now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 19 May, 2011, 10:08:50 AM
My thick as shit neighbour regularly walks across my garden to get to the next house along from us as he is too lazy and stupid to walk ten feet up his path on to the pavement.
This morning he did it while I was standing by my front door. I said to him "Do you have to keep walking across my garden?"
His reply to this was to have a go at me for looking at him funny the other day when I pulled in to my drive when he was standing on it with his girlfriend and kids!

Some people are just so thick and have no respect for people around them. These people really should be put out of my misery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: W. R. Logan on 19 May, 2011, 10:31:40 AM
Put a water sprinkler on the garden and attach a motion sensor 8-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 May, 2011, 01:45:39 PM
I was on holiday from work this week and looking forward to attending a friend's wedding today. About 36 hours ago, I discovered the wedding is actually next Thursday, so now I'm in the office without a full week off. Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 19 May, 2011, 02:58:32 PM
My 4 year old has butchered my GTA san andreas ps2 disc :( fortunatly ebay is at hand :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 May, 2011, 05:14:04 PM
Have you tried gently rubbing it with a soft cloth with Brasso?

(I'm not telling you which impediment this solution relates to).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 21 May, 2011, 04:31:29 PM
Today I bought a bottle of (Harvey's) Amontillado and discovered I don't like it and would rather be drinking Harvey's Bristol Cream.


It gets worse. Deborah laughed and said "but you didn't like it last time you bought a bottle, about six years ago." She has a longer memory than I do!

Then I checked the receipt. The shelf-edge label gave the price as having £1.56 off, but it went through the till at full price. If it hadn't been for the special offer price I wouldn't have been tempted to splash out and I would've saved my money instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 21 May, 2011, 05:17:57 PM
I assumed the Heineken cup final would be on the RTE. Curse you Rupert Murdoch. Curse your black and shriveled heart.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 May, 2011, 08:45:33 PM
Bollocks. Just crashed the car. Front end all bashed in and waiting for recovery van in pissing rain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 May, 2011, 08:52:59 PM
Bugger!  Hope no injuries.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 May, 2011, 07:22:18 PM
My Bluetooth dongle keeps uninstalling itself from my desktop PC so today I updated the BIOS hoping this might sort it. It didn't, and now the machine won't boot into Windows properly. Hopefully the warranty covers this kind of mishap.

I got out my old PC to get that back up-and-running, and the power supply went as it was booting. I think the motherboard might have had it too.

So, I've killed two computers today - one temporarily (I hope) but the other beyond repair. It's a wonder the Missus is letting me use her laptop to type this(!)

Thankfully, I have three (count 'em) up-to-date backups from yesterday so the data is fine. Still, when your livelihood depends on your computer, this is a bit of a pain...

...sigh....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 May, 2011, 08:35:07 PM
Having a great last few weeks.

Firstly I've been sent a PCN for parking in the company car park, even though I have a company parking permit on display above the tax disc. It's been two weeks of emails back and forth and still I am no nearer to having it binned. Automated shit stinks. I hope tonight when I go in that it will be all over as my manager has sent an email with all the info now. If not I'll just go mental  >:D

Also Laptop is on it's last legs, many things wrong with it but now the fan doesn't work, so it cuts out after an hour!

I had to bring the brand new PC up from the cellar (only used it to check it works and do a few things on that the laptop couldn't do any more) and now the screen is locked in safe mode bollocks. Bods are coming tomorrow to take screen away, bang goes my bloody sleep.

Went down town today to upgrade my phone to the HTC Desire HD, did all the paperwork and when they went out back to get the phone, there were none in FUCKING stock  ::)

The worst bit out of all this was that I was going to chop up the Hi-Ex! 2010 2000AD panel and post it onto youtube but that will have to wait now. Yes I was finally getting round to it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 23 May, 2011, 09:05:49 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 May, 2011, 08:35:07 PM
It's been two weeks of emails back and forth and still I am no nearer to having it binned. Automated shit stinks.

It's begun......our hubris will be our downfall...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 23 May, 2011, 10:39:51 PM
Five hours later I'm still not home from work. And I was supposed to be seeing Emeralds tonight.
Fucksticks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 25 May, 2011, 11:57:50 AM
Due to a change in my work routine it may now be Thursdays before I can get round to buying the Prog. It'll be difficult to handle this, as I've grown used to getting it on a Tuesday when the good old WH Smith staff would often put it on the shelves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 May, 2011, 12:34:52 PM
Gah!  It turns out the car is an insurance write-off.  That is inconvenient.

Where can I get a reasonable valuation just so the insurance company don't try and stiff me? (Heaven knows that would be quite out of character for them).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 25 May, 2011, 03:42:52 PM
I'm inches away from taking a baseball bat to a client for not paying (since january).. I'm getting very tempted to round up some blokes from the shady side of my circle of friends and pay them a visit.. Disgusting how artists are treated.. Do they assume we all have a rich parent that covers our rent?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2011, 06:35:05 PM
Quote from: Michaelvk on 25 May, 2011, 03:42:52 PM
I'm inches away from taking a baseball bat to a client for not paying (since january).. I'm getting very tempted to round up some blokes from the shady side of my circle of friends and pay them a visit.. Disgusting how artists are treated.. Do they assume we all have a rich parent that covers our rent?

Have you been ignored by your client so far ? if so then your client is very stupid and is asking for it.

I know exactly how you feel being self employed and its something i dont tolerate as its simply theft.If presumably there is no reason not to pay except for the clients deviousness then it makes me see red and i struggle to understand how anyone can actually deliberately not pay who they have hired to work for them and live with themselves as its all about trust and betrayel of but unfortunately it takes all sorts in life.

It involves reading the client to see if you think its likely that they will try to rip you off as they can give themselves away sometimes what their intentions are.

Its worth trying out the Small Claims Court or whatever the alternative to that is in SA if there is one as its very likely that if you are in the clear and you have it all on paper that the court will rule in your favor.

Violence and threats of violence should always be an absolute last resort though but if it came to it and i was ripped off for thousands in unpaid invoices then i would find some way to fuck them up while not incriminating myself as they are not worth getting into a spot of bother over.If you have no choice then if you can leave it for 6 months to year then it gives the bad payer a false sense of security which means when they are done over they are much less likely to associate it with yourself.


Be careful and be clever about it as these types will run to the police.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 25 May, 2011, 08:11:56 PM
I just went outside to see why a group of lads were laughing and pointing at my car only to find a dead blackbird wedged arse first into the front grille.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 25 May, 2011, 08:19:36 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 May, 2011, 08:11:56 PM
I just went outside to see why a group of lads were laughing and pointing at my car only to find a dead blackbird wedged arse first into the front grille.
You murderer. Poor innocent birdie. I bet you had to swerve a few times before you hit it.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2011, 08:32:00 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 May, 2011, 08:11:56 PM
I just went outside to see why a group of lads were laughing and pointing at my car only to find a dead blackbird wedged arse first into the front grille.

I dont quite get why anyone would want to laugh and point at that.  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 26 May, 2011, 09:54:54 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2011, 08:32:00 PMI dont quite get why anyone would want to laugh and point at that.  :-\

They just happened to be our village's allocation of idiot chavs who were passing at the time.

Quote from: vzzbux on 25 May, 2011, 08:19:36 PMYou murderer. Poor innocent birdie. I bet you had to swerve a few times before you hit it.

Thanks for that, I hate hurting anything and I always end up feeling bad about stuff like this, I have an image of a nest of baby blackbirds saying "Where's Mummy, she's been such a long time, I'm so very hungry"  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 May, 2011, 12:22:42 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 26 May, 2011, 09:54:54 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2011, 08:32:00 PMI dont quite get why anyone would want to laugh and point at that.  :-\

They just happened to be our village's allocation of idiot chavs who were passing at the time.



Enough said  ::) but they are kids which means you have to make allowances to a certain extent which i didnt think of before.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 26 May, 2011, 09:52:45 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 25 May, 2011, 06:35:05 PM
Quote from: Michaelvk on 25 May, 2011, 03:42:52 PM
I'm inches away from taking a baseball bat to a client for not paying (since january).. I'm getting very tempted to round up some blokes from the shady side of my circle of friends and pay them a visit.. Disgusting how artists are treated.. Do they assume we all have a rich parent that covers our rent?

Have you been ignored by your client so far ? if so then your client is very stupid and is asking for it.

I know exactly how you feel being self employed and its something i dont tolerate as its simply theft.If presumably there is no reason not to pay except for the clients deviousness then it makes me see red and i struggle to understand how anyone can actually deliberately not pay who they have hired to work for them and live with themselves as its all about trust and betrayel of but unfortunately it takes all sorts in life.

It involves reading the client to see if you think its likely that they will try to rip you off as they can give themselves away sometimes what their intentions are.

Its worth trying out the Small Claims Court or whatever the alternative to that is in SA if there is one as its very likely that if you are in the clear and you have it all on paper that the court will rule in your favor.

Violence and threats of violence should always be an absolute last resort though but if it came to it and i was ripped off for thousands in unpaid invoices then i would find some way to fuck them up while not incriminating myself as they are not worth getting into a spot of bother over.If you have no choice then if you can leave it for 6 months to year then it gives the bad payer a false sense of security which means when they are done over they are much less likely to associate it with yourself.


Be careful and be clever about it as these types will run to the police.

However tempted, I'm not daft enough to actually do anything silly.. Regardless that I know of a perfect way to get rid of bodies here (we have sharks.. Massive, massive sharks..)..

These cnuts are notorious bad payers.. They will absolutely take every opportunity to shaft you. They're an ad agency after all..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 26 May, 2011, 10:16:11 PM
You have to feed them live to the Great Whites  :D

I got a bit carried away there as i have had the same problem very recently and i finally called them up this evening and exactly what i expected to happen happened as in the response i got but i wont bore anyone with it apart from  to say i left the most difficult part of the job unfinished and 2 weeks later its still not finished  :lol:

Hope you get things sorted though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 26 May, 2011, 10:26:44 PM
Why is it when you point things out to women its your fault.

When I was a house husband we never ran out of the basics. But since my wife took over the reigns we do tend to run low on Milk, Marge/Butter and Bread (not on a regular basis but enough to annoy me). I have just tried to make myself some cheese sarnies but we have no Marge at all so I am munching on dry bread and cheese. We are low on milk so I will have to forfeit my cereal in the morning so the kiddies can have theirs. When I ever mention this she just moans and shouts that I don't do enough round the house and tries to turn the discussion at me.

Just fucking annoys me that's all.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 26 May, 2011, 10:32:32 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 26 May, 2011, 10:26:44 PM
Why is it when you point things out to women its your fault.

When I was a house husband we never ran out of the basics. But since my wife took over the reigns we do tend to run low on Milk, Marge/Butter and Bread (not on a regular basis but enough to annoy me). I have just tried to make myself some cheese sarnies but we have no Marge at all so I am munching on dry bread and cheese. We are low on milk so I will have to forfeit my cereal in the morning so the kiddies can have theirs. When I ever mention this she just moans and shouts that I don't do enough round the house and tries to turn the discussion at me.

Just fucking annoys me that's all.




V

heard that one! also, when i bottom the house its "not as good as i do it"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 26 May, 2011, 10:50:58 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 26 May, 2011, 10:16:11 PM
You have to feed them live to the Great Whites  :D

I was thinking semi conscious, but live would be more fun..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 May, 2011, 11:30:12 PM
The wifes Dad has had to go into hospital with breathing problems.

It's more of a worry as he's 83 and been pretty ill a few years back with cancer.

Weekend plans of course all off (quite rightly).

Hoping all is ok, my Dad's already gone so we certainly don't want to lose him too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 27 May, 2011, 10:44:00 AM
Better news on the father in law.  Seems nothing too serious at the mo so just being checked over, rested and pumped with drugs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 27 May, 2011, 11:43:08 AM
Nice one Fishy! Having the uncertainty of hospital visits for older rellies is crap. You never know if 'this is it'. Anyway, glad it was a false alarm.

Quote from: mogzilla on 26 May, 2011, 10:32:32 PM
also, when i bottom the house its "not as good as i do it"

Maybe I'm missing something, but you do what to the house? How?! [spoiler](via the tradesman's entrance I presume!)[/spoiler] And your wife is better at it? Hoookayy...

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 May, 2011, 01:09:48 PM
It's a northern thing - it means clean the house top to bottom. I remember being puzzled as a child when my gran said someone's house needed a good bottoming!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 May, 2011, 02:26:27 PM
I shall be suggesting this to the wife of my bosom tonight.  "Wife", I'll say, "the time has come for a good bottoming.  All the online comics nerds are doing it these days".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 27 May, 2011, 06:21:37 PM
ee by bgum ;)

  i thought everyone knew what that was, the nort south divide eh?tsk

and yes,chips and gravy....which after typing i now want...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 27 May, 2011, 06:35:04 PM
It took an hour and a half to get home from work. Thanks very much dissidents, can't wait to wake up in a united Ireland tomorrow
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 May, 2011, 06:45:42 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 27 May, 2011, 06:21:37 PM
ee by bgum ;)

  i thought everyone knew what that was, the nort south divide eh?tsk

and yes,chips and gravy....which after typing i now want...

I always thought it was EE BA GUM and it was funny because backwards its Mugabe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 27 May, 2011, 07:01:00 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 27 May, 2011, 11:43:08 AM
Nice one Fishy! Having the uncertainty of hospital visits for older rellies is crap. You never know if 'this is it'. Anyway, glad it was a false alarm.

Quote from: mogzilla on 26 May, 2011, 10:32:32 PM
also, when i bottom the house its "not as good as i do it"

Maybe I'm missing something, but you do what to the house? How?! [spoiler](via the tradesman's entrance I presume!)[/spoiler] And your wife is better at it? Hoookayy...

M.

Thanks Mikey.  Yep spot on there, that's the worry you have that's not there normally for younger folk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 27 May, 2011, 09:30:34 PM
Up this morning for my Coffee. Wifey says "Go have your cerial the kids can have toast".
"No Marge" >:( (but I left it at that).

Installed a customer with TV Phone and Broadband. Two hours later I get a call from Customer Services saying said customer had no dial tone (I always ring test before I leave properties).
Arrives at customers house to find that he unplugged his power unit from the wall and forgot to put it back in.
Waste my time fucking prick. Who say's the customer is always right. Wankers.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mudcrab on 27 May, 2011, 10:43:35 PM
Binmen came early. Blur of course flew into my head even though it was Friday.

Neighbour comes home, somehow miraculously manages to put his bin away and leaves stuff that was too late to be picked up sitting on the fucking pavement, bin bags and poisonous nutty cornflakes and shit. (not literally shit, been watching a lot of The Wire yo). What, you going to leave it there for 2 fucking weeks? Grud on a greenie!

Local Magpies (bless 'em) start picking at bins and start spreading shit everywhere.

Muggins here grabs wheelie bin and deals with neighbours' shit.

Complain you say? I don't even want to converse with that kind of mink. That's ned, or chav, depending how souther you are.

Fuckers could do with some weedkiller too.

My thanks for this therapeutic thread. No disrespect intended towards binmen at all. Or Magpies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 28 May, 2011, 12:15:31 AM
Damn. I just wrote "pretty thing" when I meant " pretty lass". And i can't find edit on this phone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 May, 2011, 10:18:39 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 27 May, 2011, 09:30:34 PM
Up this morning for my Coffee. Wifey says "Go have your cerial the kids can have toast".
"No Marge" >:( (but I left it at that).

Installed a customer with TV Phone and Broadband. Two hours later I get a call from Customer Services saying said customer had no dial tone (I always ring test before I leave properties).
Arrives at customers house to find that he unplugged his power unit from the wall and forgot to put it back in.
Waste my time fucking prick. Who say's the customer is always right. Wankers.




V
are you a telecomms engineer?

that's a job i'd like to have done in a different life.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 May, 2011, 05:42:37 PM
I work for Virgin Media providing all the lovely people with all our great services.
We also provide it to all the smeg and scum.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 May, 2011, 05:44:13 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 28 May, 2011, 05:42:37 PM
I work for Virgin Media providing all the lovely people with all our great services.
We also provide it to all the smeg and scum.

Ah Vzzbux, ain't it always the way! :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 28 May, 2011, 06:38:03 PM
Local whsmiths has either sold out of or not recieved prog 1734 and megazine 311 there's no where else local that sells them so it appears im fucked

What a crap start to my weekend :( not sure what the hell im going to do now.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 29 May, 2011, 11:15:01 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 28 May, 2011, 05:42:37 PM
I work for Virgin Media providing all the lovely people with all our great services.
We also provide it to all the smeg and scum.






V

I can relate to that after being in the IT team of a social housing trust for many years.  You get both.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 29 May, 2011, 11:34:14 AM
Quote from: klute on 28 May, 2011, 06:38:03 PM
Local whsmiths has either sold out of or not recieved prog 1734 and megazine 311 there's no where else local that sells them so it appears im fucked

What a crap start to my weekend :( not sure what the hell im going to do now.....

Can you not phone Denise to send you them?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 May, 2011, 12:37:05 PM
I bought a very nearly new Specialised Rockhopper and there is a problem with the back wheel as the spokes on the wheel keep snapping and now the wheel is out of true.I do not know why this is happening as i have never had this problem with any bike i have had in the past so i am at a loss to explain it other than to say the spokes on the wheel are cheap crap or its my weight on the bike that is stressing the wheel as i weigh in at about 17 stone.

It looks like the back wheel is going to have to be replaced.Its like whenever i get a flat tyre its always the back wheel that gets a puncture and never the front.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 May, 2011, 01:16:31 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 May, 2011, 12:37:05 PM
...i weigh in at about 17 stone.

That's hardly excessive for someone your height, and therefore frame-size - should be the lower end of design limits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 29 May, 2011, 03:37:31 PM
Quote from: strontium71 on 29 May, 2011, 11:34:14 AM
Quote from: klute on 28 May, 2011, 06:38:03 PM
Local whsmiths has either sold out of or not recieved prog 1734 and megazine 311 there's no where else local that sells them so it appears im fucked

What a crap start to my weekend :( not sure what the hell im going to do now.....

Can you not phone Denise to send you them?

Going to have another look on passing from work tomorrow if i still have no luck then thats what i'll do the upside to this is that,either throught stupidity or pure ignorance i had neglected the back issue section.

Which brings me to the question im after the brit cit babes GN that comes free with 299 megazine.

Would this be included with the megazine if i buy it from the back issues section?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 May, 2011, 04:12:28 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 May, 2011, 12:37:05 PM
I bought a very nearly new Specialised Rockhopper and there is a problem with the back wheel as the spokes on the wheel keep snapping and now the wheel is out of true.I do not know why this is happening as i have never had this problem with any bike i have had in the past so i am at a loss to explain it other than to say the spokes on the wheel are cheap crap or its my weight on the bike that is stressing the wheel as i weigh in at about 17 stone.

It looks like the back wheel is going to have to be replaced.Its like whenever i get a flat tyre its always the back wheel that gets a puncture and never the front.

Ah, designed obsolescence. Don't you just love it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 30 May, 2011, 07:43:36 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 30 May, 2011, 04:12:28 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 May, 2011, 12:37:05 PM
I bought a very nearly new Specialised Rockhopper and there is a problem with the back wheel as the spokes on the wheel keep snapping and now the wheel is out of true.I do not know why this is happening as i have never had this problem with any bike i have had in the past so i am at a loss to explain it other than to say the spokes on the wheel are cheap crap or its my weight on the bike that is stressing the wheel as i weigh in at about 17 stone.

It looks like the back wheel is going to have to be replaced.Its like whenever i get a flat tyre its always the back wheel that gets a puncture and never the front.
Ah, designed obsolescence. Don't you just love it?
In this case it's probably more to do with simple physics. Friction, wear and unevenly distributed strain across the load-bearing structure.

Mr Wolf, I sympathise with your predicament but there might be a couple of clues in your original post. How "nearly" new is the bicycle in question? How many times have you had to replace spokes and true the wheel since you got it? Spokes do break from time to time but if you don't get the wheel sorted as soon as possible (and sometimes even when you do) the remaining spokes are damaged by compensating for the missing ones and then some break shortly after you get the first ones replaced. The cycle then repeats so sometimes you need to either get the wheel completely rebuilt (probably not economical given that I assume these aren't top end wheels) or buy a new one.

If you are getting a lot of punctures in the same wheel, check the inner surface of the rim (as well as the inside of the tyre, obviously) for remaning sharp bits, make sure the rim tape is properly covering all the spoke ends and invest in a proper pump so you know you're inflating it to the right pressure. That alone will save you from about 75% of punctures.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 30 May, 2011, 10:19:54 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 30 May, 2011, 07:43:36 PM


Mr Wolf, I sympathise with your predicament but there might be a couple of clues in your original post. How "nearly" new is the bicycle in question? How many times have you had to replace spokes and true the wheel since you got it? Spokes do break from time to time but if you don't get the wheel sorted as soon as possible (and sometimes even when you do) the remaining spokes are damaged by compensating for the missing ones and then some break shortly after you get the first ones replaced. The cycle then repeats so sometimes you need to either get the wheel completely rebuilt (probably not economical given that I assume these aren't top end wheels) or buy a new one.

If you are getting a lot of punctures in the same wheel, check the inner surface of the rim (as well as the inside of the tyre, obviously) for remaning sharp bits, make sure the rim tape is properly covering all the spoke ends and invest in a proper pump so you know you're inflating it to the right pressure. That alone will save you from about 75% of punctures.

Thanks for the reply.

First of all 2 spokes went on the wheel so i took the wheel to a repair shop who replaced them and straightened the wheel so i thought that would be the end of it but from what i recall a short while later the same thing happened except that 6 - 8 spokes just seemed to snap all at once.I havent been doing anything excessive with it and the tyres were inflated hard.Some spokes snapped next to the wheel rim and others snapped next to the chainset.A total of 10 spokes have snapped now.

The bikes is approx 1 yr old that had hardly been ridden when i bought it but i dont have any paperwork.The wheels are what came with the bike originally and are not top end and not worth rebuilding which is a shame as it creates waste.I will have to replace with something that is better quality and not flimsy crap.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 30 May, 2011, 10:24:02 PM
Poop.

Was gonna register on the Millarworld forums, so as i could offer my above-average lettering services for pitches, paid projects and such. But the sign-up requires me to give my real name.

Uh-uh. No way. Not gonna happen. I am THAT much of a privacy freak.

Still, at least my slender grip on the pro circuit means I can register with Comic Art Auctions instead. Huzzah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 30 May, 2011, 10:29:37 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 21 May, 2011, 04:31:29 PM
Today I bought a bottle of (Harvey's) Amontillado and discovered I don't like it and would rather be drinking Harvey's Bristol Cream. Then I checked the receipt. The shelf-edge label gave the price as having £1.56 off, but it went through the till at full price.

Sometimes there is a happy ending!  :D

I took my receipt back to the supermarket yesterday and pointed out the error. The incorrect price ticket was still on the shelf, advertising the non-existent special offer. Not only did I get my £1.56 overcharge refunded, but they also gave me a quite unecessary but very welcome £2.00 gift card as a goodwill gesture, so the bottle ended up costing me less than a fiver. I've also acquired a taste for Amontillado and have drunk half the bottle already! I think I'll make it my last though: I've got better than that in my booze cupboard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 31 May, 2011, 12:21:39 AM
I would have thought you'd have casks of the stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 May, 2011, 06:50:21 AM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 31 May, 2011, 12:21:39 AM
I would have thought you'd have casks of the stuff.

For the love of God, Montressor!


(Well played, Sir).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 31 May, 2011, 12:08:23 PM
Because I went to make my morning cuppa today and my kettle was broken. Some weird fuse problem or something I suppose. The rest of the day has just gone downhill from that, being an ongoing succession of mishaps, bad timings and general annoyances and inconveniences. There's probably some old Chinese saying that goes something along the lines of: "Beware when kettle breaks because rest of day will be shit!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 31 May, 2011, 05:15:30 PM
My pull-cord shower switch doesn't work. I'm sure it's the fourth one we've had in eight years. I am not looking forward to having that apart, buying another one or doing all that fiddling about with wires to replace it again.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 31 May, 2011, 06:07:44 PM
Last July - Bought ticket for The Wonderstuff in Cooper's Field. Venue closed

Last September - Went to buy ticket for Fenech-Soler at Cardiff Barfly. Venue closed

Today - Have ticket for We Are Scientists at the Millenium Music Hall. Go on. Guess.

Looks like I'm the kiss of death for any music venue in Cardiff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 31 May, 2011, 06:14:36 PM

Quote from: paddykafka on 31 May, 2011, 12:08:23 PM
Because I went to make my morning cuppa today and my kettle was broken.
You have no saucepans? Mankind did boil water before the coming of St Morphy of Richards!

Quote from: worldshown on 31 May, 2011, 06:07:44 PM
Looks like I'm the kiss of death for any music venue

If you're ever up north, please go nowhere near The Band on the Wall or Hebden Bridge Trades Club as they're cracking venues.

I'm still mourning the sad demise of Jilly's Rockworld - it's a friggin' Tesco now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 31 May, 2011, 08:15:07 PM
My sofa is starting to fall to bits.

Going to have to buy one some time soonish.  Bummer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 31 May, 2011, 10:14:10 PM
had our first nutter on ebay...sold a freeloader for the gamecube and sent it in bubble wrap in its tin ,he now says (several days later) its not working "badly scratched" and he had it professionally cleaned and its still not working ...i reminded him how it was packed and it was fine when it left me,any minor marks were certainly not "badly scratched" i also pointed out we dont offer returns ...got another message from him (again,days later) basically going off on one saying i'm a shit and "keep the money fool" i was wondering if it was mr t but his spelling was more cyberleader than ba baracus.

we shouldve done a car boot less hassle. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 31 May, 2011, 11:01:18 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 31 May, 2011, 05:15:30 PM
My pull-cord shower switch doesn't work. I'm sure it's the fourth one we've had in eight years. I am not looking forward to having that apart, buying another one or doing all that fiddling about with wires to replace it again.

>:(

Our pull-cord died last year, fortunately my brother is a bit of an electrician so he fixed it for us.  Do you leave your shower switched on when its not in use? (I mean the power, not the water) because Mark (my bro) reckons that's what buggered ours, it causes some sort of welding effect on the circuits inside the switch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 June, 2011, 12:24:16 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 31 May, 2011, 10:14:10 PM
had our first nutter on ebay...

My missus got into eBay selling in a big way while on maternity leave - she's a crafty type (both senses) and started off making and selling stuff, then pleased with her success but lacking the time for the 'making' part she started flogging our possessions.  Then she had a brainwave, and decided to start selling broken crap she'd pick up for nothing at recycling centres and the last hour of parish sales.  Sometimes she breaks it down into spare parts (particularly for prams and baby buggies), sometimes she just takes a photo, says how it's broken, and waits.  The nutters she attracts are simply unbelievable, as are the prices she sometimes commands (example: a handful of small plastic dogs - a bidding war took them up to €20.00; a single clip for a rain cover for a buggy: €15.00; €27 for a single buggy wheel).  

Most recently she sold a crappy plastic toy horse.  It was broken off its stand, and missing an ear, actually a casting mistake rather than a breakage, and she included a photo and an 'item as shown' disclaimer, and noted the mistake and other damage etc.  She received a tirade of abuse from the buyer, "this horse is missing an ear, I have never been so disgusted or disappointed".  She explained that the listing had made that clear, more abuse came back.   Exasperated she offered a full refund (it was after all, some worthless crap she was chancing her arm with),  more abuse came back.  Then suddenly:  "I have fallen in love with this horse.  I'm going to try to repair its ear, but it gives it such character.  Thank you very much for this lovely piece".  

What.  The.  F**k.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 June, 2011, 08:33:20 AM
My mum was 80 in March and my dad will be 80 in November, so they're having a joint birthday garden party/barbecue in July. They asked me and my brothers what hols we had booked , and I said any weekend was fine except the 16th, when my best friend turns 50 - she's hosting a camping weekend for dozens of friends at Shell Island in Wales. The parent's do was therefore arranged for 23rd.

My friend has now moved her birthday bash to the 23rd to fit in with school hols for people who are bringing kids, meaning I can't go. I'm gutted - would have been a fantastic drink'n'drug fuelled weekend of nostalgia with lots of mates I haven't seen for ages.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 01 June, 2011, 08:59:01 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare
...would have been a fantastic drink'n'drug fuelled weekend...

You could perhaps try to turn the 80th Birthday Garden Party into the same kind of event...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Keef Monkey on 01 June, 2011, 10:19:44 AM
I ordered a couple of dvds from Amazon.com (you can't seem to get them over here in the UK), paid for the dvds and international shipping, and just had a card from the postie saying they're holding the package until I pay a £12.99 customs charge because the postage was underpaid. Surely that sucks?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 June, 2011, 10:24:36 AM
Quote from: Banners on 01 June, 2011, 08:59:01 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare
...would have been a fantastic drink'n'drug fuelled weekend...

You could perhaps try to turn the 80th Birthday Garden Party into the same kind of event...?

:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 02:00:40 PM
Quote from: Tombo on 31 May, 2011, 11:01:18 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 31 May, 2011, 05:15:30 PM
My pull-cord shower switch doesn't work. I'm sure it's the fourth one we've had in eight years.

Do you leave your shower switched on when its not in use? (I mean the power, not the water) because Mark (my bro) reckons that's what buggered ours, it causes some sort of welding effect on the circuits inside the switch.

No. We always switch it off. My partner wondered if that was the problem - that we'd overworked the switch! I did notice when I took the last broken switch off that some metal component had melted to slag. I may as well buy the next replacement before investigating what happened to this one. I very much doubt it's fixable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 02:04:43 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 01 June, 2011, 08:33:20 AM
My friend has now moved her birthday bash to the 23rd to fit in with school hols for people who are bringing kids, meaning I can't go. I'm gutted - would have been a fantastic drink'n'drug fuelled weekend of nostalgia with lots of mates I haven't seen for ages.

That kind of diary clash is terrible bad luck. I hate it when that happens.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 01 June, 2011, 03:37:36 PM
Quote from: Keef Monkey on 01 June, 2011, 10:19:44 AM
...holding the package until I pay a £12.99 customs charge because the postage was underpaid. Surely that sucks?

Be thankful you're not being charged VAT for import and a handling fee for them keeping it for you. Sounds a bit odd that the PO are asking too - surely that would have been obvious to the USPS or whoever as it left the states.

My minor impediment is Castlewellan Gold trees. Specifically the stumps. There were a row of three in our garden, they were cut down around 3 years ago and I treated the stumps. We're going all outdoors an shit and getting a deck, so the overgrown area where the trees were needed clearing out. It took me total of around 12 hours to remove the stumps - and that was just leveling them to the existing garden surface. They were like 3ft fuckin dart boards - they hadn't began to rot, but had soaked up all moisture that came their way so wouldn't split when I axed the buggers. Had to saw through sections of sodden wood, which is not easy let em tell ye, then blatter off sections with a lump hammer and a hatchet. The roots were so well established I suspected if I removed the stump, the world would be sucked into the hole. My knees are killing me! If I ever meet the fella that planted them I'll punch him onna nose!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 June, 2011, 03:40:21 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 02:00:40 PM
No. We always switch it off.

Probably should stop using it for your autoerotic asphyxiation needs, convenient though it obviously is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 04:58:40 PM
I'll have you know I also refuse non-reusable carrierbags at the supermarket on planned shopping trips (but there are always oranges in the fruit bowl, and lemons in the fridge, and now and then satsumas).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: dangermouse3597 on 01 June, 2011, 04:58:59 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 02:00:40 PM
Quote from: Tombo on 31 May, 2011, 11:01:18 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 31 May, 2011, 05:15:30 PM
My pull-cord shower switch doesn't work. I'm sure it's the fourth one we've had in eight years.

Do you leave your shower switched on when its not in use? (I mean the power, not the water) because Mark (my bro) reckons that's what buggered ours, it causes some sort of welding effect on the circuits inside the switch.

No. We always switch it off.

Check that the switch is actually a large enough current rating for the shower cos it sounds as if it isn't up to the job. You may need to upgrade the switch especially if your shower has been enlarged (assuming it's an electric shower not just a power shower)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 05:04:35 PM
Quote from: dangermouse3597 on 01 June, 2011, 04:58:59 PM
Check that the switch is actually a large enough current rating for the shower cos it sounds as if it isn't up to the job. You may need to upgrade the switch especially if your shower has been enlarged (assuming it's an electric shower not just a power shower)

Top tip! I'd assumed my electrician knew what he was doing when he wired in the thing. I will check the current rating of both the old and the next switch on Friday before tackling the job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: dangermouse3597 on 01 June, 2011, 05:14:53 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 05:04:35 PM
Quote from: dangermouse3597 on 01 June, 2011, 04:58:59 PM
Check that the switch is actually a large enough current rating for the shower cos it sounds as if it isn't up to the job. You may need to upgrade the switch especially if your shower has been enlarged (assuming it's an electric shower not just a power shower)

Top tip! I'd assumed my electrician knew what he was doing when he wired in the thing. I will check the current rating of both the old and the next switch on Friday before tackling the job.

You'll need to check the shower current or the KW rating as well just to be on the safe side.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 June, 2011, 07:37:31 PM
I reckon it's 9.5 kw. I'm on it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 June, 2011, 07:49:48 PM
Ah electricity and water, was there ever a more fun mix?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: dangermouse3597 on 01 June, 2011, 07:57:43 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 June, 2011, 07:49:48 PM
Ah electricity and water, was there ever a more fun mix?
Yup how about electricity, water and gas? Sometimes my job even scares me....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 June, 2011, 08:04:47 PM
Bush & Button?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 01 June, 2011, 08:11:39 PM
I dont get the purpose of electric showers and if your shower doubles up as a bath [over the bath] then just run the shower off the hot and cold water as you dont have electric baths.

Perhaps someone knows better than i do even though i have refurbished various flats and houses ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 01 June, 2011, 08:35:12 PM
I recently fitted an electric shower over my bath and it is fine. I replaced our very old one. With the electric shower you don't have to have you boiler on as it gives you instant hot water. Thermostats are a wonderful thing.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 01 June, 2011, 09:04:39 PM
FARCRY 2 's interact button 'e' doesn't work. I can't go on in the game and I'm barely in the first episode. I can't pick up the health pack and the UBisoft patch won't load up aborting itself with an error message. My machine has Malaria more than the Merc Scum I was playing as.

Alright it was only £7 from STEAM but you know-frustrating! Don't see a fix for this one it's another Call of Cthulu moment. My Graphics card did for that one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 02 June, 2011, 07:18:54 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 01 June, 2011, 08:11:39 PM
Perhaps someone knows better than i do

You may be onto something there.

The great advantage of an electric shower is that the water temperature is constant and instantly adjustable. Another advantage is the water pressure. I once rented a house with a shower over the bath - a shower was a prerequisite for me when choosing a place to rent - but when I moved in I found that because the immersion tank was in the bathroom and lower than the shower it was impossible to get a sufficient flow of hot water to the shower. I told the landlady, who replied "Oh, we didn't put the shower in - the previous tenant did." So that's alright then.

A third advantage of an electric shower, if you live with other people, is that it stays hot even if someone decides to run a tap in the kitchen while you're showering. It doesn't suddenly go freezing cold then scald you because the flow of hot water from the tank has been interrupted.

Also I am told that showering electric is cheaper in the long run than showering from a hot water tank because of the volume of water that has to be heated all in one go to fill a tank. Maybe you can get a satisfactory shower just as cheaply from a mixer tap if you have a combination boiler. I don't see why not but I haven't put it to the test.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 June, 2011, 07:20:47 PM
Quote from: IAMTHESYSTEM
FARCRY 2 's interact button 'e' doesn't work.

I wouldn't bother. Far Cry 2 is by far the worst game I have had the misfortune to buy in recent memory. As bad as it is now, it won't get any better...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 02 June, 2011, 07:41:18 PM
Ah well. Cheers for the reply Banners. It seems I'm not missing out on much but I always enjoyed the original FARCRY so hoped this would be good too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 June, 2011, 10:02:38 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 01 June, 2011, 08:11:39 PM
I dont get the purpose of electric showers and if your shower doubles up as a bath [over the bath] then just run the shower off the hot and cold water as you dont have electric baths.

Perhaps someone knows better than i do even though i have refurbished various flats and houses ?

We have one as we have no Gas or Oil and thus only heat the main tank at night with electric.  To run our showers would empty it really quickly I think so we have a seperate electric shower.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 02 June, 2011, 11:54:12 PM
Thanks for the replies as i have only ever run straight off the hot/cold from combi boilers and you can compensate for the loss of hot water if its used by others with a thermostatic mixer tap.A couple of flats i refurbed had constant hot water from a very large communal boiler or tank or whatever it was as they were in a block of flats and not only that the pressure of both the hot and cold was very high so you had the kind of shower that blasts you with water so hard it almost hurt the skin.No idea how that was possible.

I havent seen an immersion heater for years either.

Other than that i dont know very much as i dont get involved in plumbing as its someone elses job and what i mean by that is for example you never see electric showers in wet rooms as its always run from the hot and cold with thermostatic mixers but i have no idea why.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spaceghost on 03 June, 2011, 08:40:35 AM
I cut my finger open quite badly on the grill from a disposable barbecue whilst away camping at the weekend.

It bled for ages and is now sloooowly healing. I'm on antibiotics in case it's infected and it keeps hurting like buggery. Not only that but I've lost all feeling in the tip of my finger. Don't know if this is temporary or not.

And, to add insult to injury, It's my index finger on my drawing hand so all these art projects I'm (supposed to be) working on, which I'm already behind schedule on, are to going to be delayed by a further couple of weeks at least.

Shit and buggeration.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 03 June, 2011, 09:54:39 AM
I had to bribe a bouncer a tenner to let me and a mate into a bar last night. He wasn't going to let us in as there was a 21st birthday party going on. I'm only 30, but it was the first time in my life I've been the oldest person in a pub/bar. And now just to make feel even older I've got a rotten hangover.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 June, 2011, 10:18:02 AM
Could you not just have gone to a different bar?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 June, 2011, 10:20:38 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 03 June, 2011, 10:18:02 AM
Could you not just have gone to a different bar?

He'd still have the hangover if he'd gone to a different bar. And this one was full of nubile 20-year-olds. QED.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 03 June, 2011, 10:30:17 AM
It was the only place open at the time I went in. The moment when I realised that I was a bit out of place was when I got talking to a woman and the only thing we had in common was doing English Literature at A Level. The difference being that while she finished hers two years ago, I finished mine about 11 years back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 03 June, 2011, 11:41:46 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 03 June, 2011, 10:30:17 AM
I got talking to a woman and the only thing we had in common was doing English Literature at A Level

You smooth operator! A-level talk. The chicks totally dig that.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 June, 2011, 06:04:34 PM
Quote from: Banners on 02 June, 2011, 07:20:47 PM
Quote from: IAMTHESYSTEM
FARCRY 2 's interact button 'e' doesn't work.

I wouldn't bother. Far Cry 2 is by far the worst game I have had the misfortune to buy in recent memory. As bad as it is now, it won't get any better...

I have started playing FarCry 2 and i am liking the African setting so what is so terribly bad about it  ?


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 June, 2011, 09:22:49 AM
Shower's fixed. I still don't know what the trouble was.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 04 June, 2011, 09:39:47 AM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 03 June, 2011, 06:04:34 PM
Quote from: Banners on 02 June, 2011, 07:20:47 PM
Quote from: IAMTHESYSTEM
FARCRY 2 's interact button 'e' doesn't work.

I wouldn't bother. Far Cry 2 is by far the worst game I have had the misfortune to buy in recent memory. As bad as it is now, it won't get any better...

I have started playing FarCry 2 and i am liking the African setting so what is so terribly bad about it  ?





Long travel times and re-spawning enemies at checkpoints you already cleared seem to be the biggest complaints, I picked it up myself in a Steam sale for a couple of quid but have yet to play it because of those annoyances.


My impediment is that my new fake dog poo (trod in style) doesn't quite sit right on the floor which ruins the effect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 June, 2011, 10:10:08 AM
Quote from: Peter WolfI have started playing FarCry 2 and i am liking the African setting so what is so terribly bad about it  ?

As far as I remember, it was the respawning enemies, the way that convoys just went around in a circle and that for some reason (can't remember now) the way you had to keep your eyes on this flashing green dot in one corner of the screen rather than actually enjoy the graphics which did it in for me.

Maybe I was a being a bit harsh - it was certainly fun for a while.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 04 June, 2011, 12:52:20 PM
Herself's cat was put down yesterday.. Poor girl's devastated..


On the subject of Farcry 2.. Living in Africa I can confirm that it actually does look like Africa..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 04 June, 2011, 12:58:27 PM
Poor pussy cat.

I've asked for a refund since I can't play the Game.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 04 June, 2011, 03:10:51 PM
Good on ya, IATS. Condolences Mike.

Now, my blooger is really shit. I can't comment on my or other's blogs. It won't let me choose a profile, it just orders in belligerent red font, "Choose a Profile." And half the time it doesn't have the option of uploading images.   

Blogger, you are shit
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 04 June, 2011, 04:03:29 PM
Quote from: Krombasher on 04 June, 2011, 03:10:51 PM
Good on ya, IATS. Condolences Mike.

Now, my blooger is really shit. I can't comment on my or other's blogs. It won't let me choose a profile, it just orders in belligerent red font, "Choose a Profile." And half the time it doesn't have the option of uploading images.  

Blogger, you are shit
Blogger maybe playing up then. This morning it wouldn't let me sign in to comment. Kept making me go round in circles. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 04 June, 2011, 04:35:08 PM
Probably, and waiting forever for the page to load too. On a friends land line its much easier going, but I suspect the wi-fi causes a lot of my grief, therefore my fault for refusing to pay corporations ridiculous stand out charges and spending a lot more on flipping dongles :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 04 June, 2011, 06:27:40 PM
I was in the vicinity of my favourite second hand bookshop today so I thought I'd pop in for a browse, only to find that it's now a shoe shop.
Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 04 June, 2011, 06:31:50 PM
Bike nicked.
Turned down for an ASDA job , which was to supplement my main job.
Can't get BT Vision to record - again.
Have got a spot.
Can life get any better than this? I think not.. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 04 June, 2011, 07:55:54 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 04 June, 2011, 06:27:40 PM
I was in the vicinity of my favourite second hand bookshop today so I thought I'd pop in for a browse, only to find that it's now a shoe shop.
Bugger.

How far exactly into the shop were you before i dawned on you?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 June, 2011, 08:18:51 PM
Quote from: Banners on 04 June, 2011, 10:10:08 AM
Quote from: Peter WolfI have started playing FarCry 2 and i am liking the African setting so what is so terribly bad about it  ?

As far as I remember, it was the respawning enemies, the way that convoys just went around in a circle and that for some reason (can't remember now) the way you had to keep your eyes on this flashing green dot in one corner of the screen rather than actually enjoy the graphics which did it in for me.

Maybe I was a being a bit harsh - it was certainly fun for a while.

I havent got that far with the game as its on hold until i have the spare time to devote to it [i am saving all my gameplay until the autumn/winter when its likely i wont have any work] but i will look out for that but its not good news as i had high hopes for it.


I was asked to leave a pub i was drinking in which is a first as i have never been kicked out of a pub before.I was having a drink with my mum and dad in a pub just around the corner which i thought was a half decent pub but it turns out i was wrong.It started because i pointed out to the bubble head barmaid that it was rude to snatch my mums glass off the table without asking if it was finished with particularly as it still had drink and ice in it.As it was the third time this happened i decided to say something but some people cannot be told anything and they dont like being told.Then some drunk piece of trash was listening into our conversation and decided to act in a belligerant manner and comment on it when it was none of her business so i had to tell her to shut her mouth.

She shouted "YOU THINK YOU ARE SUCH A HE-MAN !!"  :lol: :lol:


We were then asked to leave.

Just for the hell of it after i left i went back in again and the barmaid said "I thought i asked you to leave ?" so i said you did but now i am back !  :lol:

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 June, 2011, 01:19:01 AM
One of my gerbils jumped out of my hand as I was lowering her to the floor in the hallway and she landed horribly with most of her weight on one front paw. She also bashed her nose a bit. I thought she was having a stroke or a fit and was going to die but she was just panicky and trying to get up and run with only three legs working. It took ages to calm her down and recapture her and it was quite upsetting for us as well as her. I feel guilty about it because she didn't need picking up in the first place as she had only just been let out for exercize. I have every confidence she will survive the night and make a full recovery before Monday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 June, 2011, 08:16:47 PM
I feel that my unblemished record of never missing a working day in my life may be near an end, due to feeling shit for the last month or so. I've tried to let my body battle whatever is wrong with me but I may have to finally admit defeat and go see the doc!

Even though I know I need to go and get checked out, my bloody work ethic is stopping me, as I feel that the possibilty of missing work for an illness is not a good enough reason. How mad am I  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 June, 2011, 08:55:13 PM
My Dad hardly ever missed a day's work in his life. He died at sixty, leaving nothing because he had nothing. How I wish he'd skived off a day or a week or two here and there to spend with my brother and me rather than buying into this pathetic Working Class Hero bullshit. His tombstone should read "Absent Father But Excellent Slave."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 June, 2011, 09:20:03 PM
That's why everyone should work nights, I have messed about with Sam every day of his life except when I go to cons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 07 June, 2011, 09:29:55 PM
More 'Life Spugs' than minor impediments, but I am currently having to get up at 5.00am to go to work for £30 a day to do a job that produces the same stock availability data day in, day out.

The data is discarded daily without it generating any additional sales. At the same time, stock languishes on shelves upstairs in the warehouse, but it's not my job to touch it, and if I got involved in replenishment I wouldn't have time to gather the useless information on what we are not selling. I've tried telling them I'd be better deployed on replenishment than auditing but they won't listen. I came home from work today and slept for seven hours due to lost sleep.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 07 June, 2011, 09:52:18 PM
Sympathy HoU. I used to get up at 5.00 AM, then 5.30 Am when I got my car- for SEVEN years!

Hopefully you won't have to it for that long.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 June, 2011, 04:39:17 PM
My nearly two year old daughter has recently discovered the delights of Play-do.

She calls it pea-do though, which didn't really click until I was pushing her along in the supermarket trolley earlier and she spied some on the shelf of Asda's toy section and started shouting "Daddy pea-do, Daddy pea-do" at the top of her voice :-[.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 12 June, 2011, 06:30:23 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 12 June, 2011, 09:02:18 PM
"pea do" as its now known is hell to shift from the carpet if it gets in there!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 12 June, 2011, 09:11:24 PM
i'm on a safeguarding course tomorrow morning which is good despite the fact itll play heck on my hip/back sitting for hours. just the pain of getting back to preston on public transport so in the event the buses are on time/no hold ups i'll be in work 1 - 1 1/2 hours
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 12 June, 2011, 09:23:29 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 12 June, 2011, 09:02:18 PM
"pea do" as its now known is hell to shift from the carpet if it gets in there!

You're on about pea-doh stains are you?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 13 June, 2011, 12:08:44 PM
a box containing cutlery and mugs seems to have gone AWOL during our move... strange its just that one that is missing, still might mean I HAVE to buy the new JD mug
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 13 June, 2011, 05:48:20 PM
had a really good morning on a course and had to go back to work cue hour and a half bus ride with a quick stop for a butty to take in ...i ate the butty when i arrived then got told off for it! apparently i should have eaten it on the bus as she expects me to start as soon as i came in...if id have known that id have had a very long lunch out as the bugger would never have known how long the buses took.
  then due to a heavy workload i havnt been up to date weighing some kids due to the 2-3 clinics a week so shes going to have a word about that on wednsday and to top it all im being blamed for the room being left a mess after the last clinic which i know it wasnt so some one has mucked it up from friday afternoon to whenever she found it and again i get the blame...  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 14 June, 2011, 04:25:42 PM
No money in to the bank account till thursday so wednesdays prog will have to wait till then or friday :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 14 June, 2011, 05:29:47 PM
Now the headset has gone on this POS bike that i bought or whatever the part is that turns the front wheel.It puts up resistance when i am turning which is unsafe plus it makes a horrible creaking noise and it went without warning.

I am sick of all this fucking shit that is built in SE Asia and China[because of Globalism >:(] because as if reducing labor costs down to a negligable amount isnt enough the manufacturer cuts corners on the build quality yet there is no reduction on what you pay for it but you get third rate fucking shite.

It pisses me right off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 14 June, 2011, 10:41:45 PM
So I was digging a hole in the flowerbed where we're going to plant a sapling. Suddenly, the shovel hit something solid, and I discovered an old metal tin taped up tightly with gaffer tape. "How exciting!" I thought, "this must be some kind of time capsule!"

My mind started wondering about old newspaper clippings, photos - maybe a handwritten note from many, many years I go, that would be hidden inside. I summoned the Missus and we huddled over the box ready to open it - excited and eager to discover the rare and valuable treasures within. So what was in this 'box of delights'...?

Turned out to be some kind of decomposed green gerbil. Quite possibly the worst and most unholy thing I have ever cast eyes upon...

Urgh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 June, 2011, 10:48:40 PM
Best burn it. The last thing you need is a zombie gerbil scuttling about the place while you're trying to get some sleep.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 15 June, 2011, 08:15:20 AM
Ow.  My pinkie was trod on last night so I think I have my second broken finger in as many months.

And worse, some bloke came to remove our old white meter for the electricity (so we can switch "I'm sorry, our systems can't handle two meters") but in the process he somehow seems to have disconnected our TV aerial.

I'm struggling to see how this can happen especially as it has also affected the neighbours who get their feed from the aerial on our roof top. I can't imagine way anything being cut inside the house would affect what was going on outside the house or why the TV aerial would go anywhere near an electricity meter in the first place.

Or well, it's DVDs only for us until we get it sorted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 June, 2011, 10:42:55 PM
Tips. If you have a booster in you attic and is being fed by your electric then there may have been a power surge when he switched you meter thus blowing you booster. Get the bastards back out to have a look who knows what other damage they may have caused.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 16 June, 2011, 12:48:37 PM
No boosters in the attic. And the freeview signal magically came back last night and is gone again this morning so I haven't a clue what is going on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 18 June, 2011, 06:15:08 PM
If both yours and you neighbours are doing the same and are running off the same antennae the only thing I can think of is that your roof antennae may be loose/knackered or there is a dodgy F connection on the coax feed.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 18 June, 2011, 09:34:27 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 15 June, 2011, 08:15:20 AM
Ow.  My pinkie was trod on last night so I think I have my second broken finger in as many months.

Are you getting enough calcium?  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 18 June, 2011, 09:55:48 PM
I was supposed to be supervising today, just filling in as one had the day off but the work load was too heavy which but a stop to that. I have been waiting quite a while for that opportunity just to have it snatched from under me.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 19 June, 2011, 07:28:07 PM
...I finally caved in and got a LoveFilm subscription (using the 30 day free trial) - primarily to use the 'Watch Now' streaming function via the PS3 - but my word, what a fucking terrible selection of films they have! I'm actually shocked - literally 90% of it is unwatchable garbage, and there's nothing more recent than 2009 as far as I can tell. Will definitely be cancelling before the 30 days is up. As things are, it's certainly not worth £10 a month - and I could never be arsed with all the faffing about of posting discs.

They're going to have to come up with something better than this if they want to offer a viable legal alternative to torrents! Why oh why can't we have Netflix in the UK?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 19 June, 2011, 08:57:15 PM
Wetherspoons had "run out of" Welsh rarebit.

How do you do that, then? Had the guy who grates the cheese and mixes it with beer or mustard gone home already? We were offered "just cheese on toast" as a substitute at the same cost. "What about cheese on toast plus some of that stilton and spring onion sauce for us to try?" I suggested. "I'll ask," he replied. I had to ask a second time when they brought the food.

Bloody good job too they brought us some warmed up stilton sauce: their idea of cheese on toast involved a cheese single on a slice of bread under a grill until the bread blackens - not quite a substitute for a named vintage cheddar mixed with some fancy real ale.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 19 June, 2011, 11:38:32 PM
My Xbox Live Gold Account has lapsed because my bank card expired. I'm fine with this, because I never use it and had been meaning to downgrade to silver. But logging on today I realised that rather than allow the account to revert back to silver - as it used to - Microsoft have suspended my entire account, blocking me from even logging in. The only way I can sort it is by calling their (US-based) 'support centre' at international rates, when of course they could just put a simple button on the Xbox dash, or the Xbox website, to do this.

I hate it when companies are so nakedly greedy and grasping, clinging on to you cash or details like that. I know I shouldn't expect any better of Microsoft but there you go.

I had a rather unpleasant exchange the other day with some call-centre type. I phoned to activate my new credit card, and suddenly found myself being sold insurance for it. I very firmly but politely told the guy on the other end that I wasn't interested and was calling to activate my card, not to buy anything. He kept asking me why I didn't want the insurance. I got increasingly frustrated with this, and in the end had to resort to being pretty harsh and rude to get him to shut up and end the call - I felt a little ashamed that I had lost my cool, but he was so damn persistent I was left with little choice. Things like that really sour me against companies who treat their customers in this way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DrJomster on 19 June, 2011, 11:43:28 PM
Radiator: lovefilm's ok for hacking through tv series.

The evidence. We own Oz up to season 5 but have stalled on 3. Whereas we're working our way through season 4 of the Wire quite nicely. Both are good tv.

But yeah, the "free" stuff... Well, that tells you why it's free! ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 June, 2011, 12:03:42 AM
The thing is, I know that i could never be arsed with posting DVDs back and forth. I'd rather just buy or download films. I'm pretty sure that lovefilm's business model is dependent on a percentage of customers who join but then let their usage lapse through laziness and never get round to cancelling their direct debit, and I don't want to be one of those people!

Online streaming really does appeal, and is surely the future, although it would seem that there is not a decent option for people in the uk as yet. The selection of streaming content that lovefilm offer (which is the same for all subscribers regardless of the free trial period) is laughably poor.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 20 June, 2011, 05:27:02 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 19 June, 2011, 08:57:15 PM
Wetherspoons had "run out of" Welsh rarebit.

How do you do that, then? Had the guy who grates the cheese and mixes it with beer or mustard gone home already? We were offered "just cheese on toast" as a substitute at the same cost. "What about cheese on toast plus some of that stilton and spring onion sauce for us to try?" I suggested. "I'll ask," he replied. I had to ask a second time when they brought the food.

Bloody good job too they brought us some warmed up stilton sauce: their idea of cheese on toast involved a cheese single on a slice of bread under a grill until the bread blackens - not quite a substitute for a named vintage cheddar mixed with some fancy real ale.

For years and years and years i thought it was called Welsh Rabbit.

Anyway let that unfortunate episode be a lesson to you as i am shocked and saddened that someone of your taste and refinement would even set foot inside a Wetherspoons.

There is a depression going on but things cant be that bad can they ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 June, 2011, 06:17:46 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 20 June, 2011, 05:27:02 PM
For years and years and years i thought it was called Welsh Rabbit.

You're not alone there, squire - particularly as it's still often spelled that way.  When (as a vegetarian stoodent) I finally discovered the happy truth, I started mainlining it, embarked on a long and fruitful project of perfecting my own recipe.  At one time most of my bedsit kitchen was given over to tabasco, paprika, mustards, beer, sometimes eggs and various cheeses as budget allowed. 

At some point I realised I was basically living on cheese on toast, but they were happy days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 June, 2011, 07:15:13 PM
tHANKS vzz, EVERYTHING IS ok NOW and has been for several days so fingers crossed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 June, 2011, 10:27:37 PM
Why do people who have sent emails from their iPhone feel the need to tell me about their chosen means of communication with the little "Sent from my iPhone" signature at the bottom of their messages? Do I put "sent from my crappy old laptop" at the foot of my emails...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 20 June, 2011, 10:30:50 PM
Annoyingly smug as it is, I don't think they can do anything about it.. I think it's nailed into the iPhone's email app..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 20 June, 2011, 11:00:53 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 20 June, 2011, 05:27:02 PM
For years and years and years i thought it was called Welsh Rabbit.

You're not wrong there, Squire!

I found out last night (yes, via wikipedia!) that it was indeed called 'Welsh rabbit' from its first appearance c.1724 up until the nineteenth century when the 'rarebit' variation was invented. Whichever way you look at it, it's a slur on the Welsh: it either means that rabbit is the poor Englishman's meat and the poor Welshman's rabbit is cheese, or it means Welshman are inept hunters; if a Welshman goes out hunting rabbit, he's going to end up with cheese on toast for dinner.

At its most benign, 'Welsh rabbit' is gentle mockery of the Welsh having a renowned fondness for cheese, going back many hundreds of years, at least as far as Tudor times. The implication would be that the Welsh would just as happily eat cheese as freely available meat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 June, 2011, 11:12:56 PM
Cheese-eating choir monkeys?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 June, 2011, 09:27:10 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 20 June, 2011, 11:00:53 PM
it either means that rabbit is the poor Englishman's meat and the poor Welshman's rabbit is cheese, or it means Welshman are inept hunters; if a Welshman goes out hunting rabbit, he's going to end up with cheese on toast for dinner.

See, this forum wasn't the first to discover the Universal Fixit:

"I've had a crap day's hunting, I can't seem to catch anything"
"Have you tried cheese?"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 21 June, 2011, 09:33:34 AM
Quote from: Michaelvk on 20 June, 2011, 10:30:50 PM
Annoyingly smug as it is, I don't think they can do anything about it.. I think it's nailed into the iPhone's email app..

It does it itself! Nothing to do with me!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 June, 2011, 10:39:13 AM
You can turn it off in the iPhone settings.

And yes, it is annoying - when iPhones first came out it took me a while to figure out that people weren't typing it themselves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 21 June, 2011, 10:43:37 AM
QuoteYou can turn it off in the iPhone settings.

Ah-ha! Nice one- just did it, thanks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 June, 2011, 11:21:55 AM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 21 June, 2011, 10:43:37 AM
QuoteYou can turn it off in the iPhone settings.

Ah-ha! Nice one- just did it, thanks!

And with a single post, Radiator stripped RAC of his carefully-crafted public expressions of self-worth...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 21 June, 2011, 11:32:02 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 21 June, 2011, 11:21:55 AM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 21 June, 2011, 10:43:37 AM
QuoteYou can turn it off in the iPhone settings.

Ah-ha! Nice one- just did it, thanks!

And with a single post, Radiator stripped RAC of his carefully-crafted public expressions of self-worth...

*Sob* it's true...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 23 June, 2011, 05:58:47 PM
Got a hero prop that has to be delivered on monday. The 3d model has been struggled with at the rapid prototypers since tuesday evening.. It's unlikely that the latest files that I've sent will work either.. I'm going to have to find a place in the world capitol of lazy fucks (Cape Town), on a friday (everyone fucks off at 1400), another method of actually getting the bloody thing done. This will probably ruin my weekend plans which have been in place for well over a month. I'm not being paid nearly enough for this..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 23 June, 2011, 06:43:38 PM
..it's off.. It's working.. Fingers crossed it comes together on time..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2011, 06:48:42 PM
The Middleton family.There is just something about them all which i find very annoying.After the respite from endlessly hearing about Kate MiddleClasston its now Pippa this Pippa that and "what will Pippa do next ?" and "What will Pippa do with her life ?"

Even the name Pippa is annoying.

I wish they would all Fuck Off

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 23 June, 2011, 06:49:27 PM
Where's Dog Deever?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 23 June, 2011, 10:06:08 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 23 June, 2011, 06:48:42 PM
The Middleton family.There is just something about them all which i find very annoying.After the respite from endlessly hearing about Kate MiddleClasston its now Pippa this Pippa that and "what will Pippa do next ?" and "What will Pippa do with her life ?"

Even the name Pippa is annoying.

I wish they would all Fuck Off

>:(

oh Pippa, Pippa Pippa Pippa


she of the 20 something arse and the 40 something face.  What an enigma.

LIke you, I am sick of the sight of the spoiled cow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 June, 2011, 10:13:26 PM
Just for you Pete.

(http://cdn.stylishandtrendy.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Kate-Middleton-and-her-sister-Pippa-Middleton-2.jpg)





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 23 June, 2011, 10:16:37 PM
Ah , but you would though , wouldn't you? And both at the same time too..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 24 June, 2011, 07:24:47 AM
Isn't 'pippa' Greek for oral sex or something?

It would explain why Prince Philip was smiling at the wedding.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 June, 2011, 08:28:28 AM
Oh, that's who Pippa is.  I'd taken my eye off the media for a while and couldn't quite figure out who the Pippa on all of the newspaper and magazine headlines was.  I'd assumed she was from some TV show like TOWIE or something.  And she has a nice arse you say?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 24 June, 2011, 09:05:06 AM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 23 June, 2011, 10:06:08 PM

she of the 20 something arse and the 40 something face.  What an enigma.

Over here in the Emerald Isle (and maybe other places) she would be described as a "1690" - 16 from the back, 90 from the front. It's also significant date for those interested in 17th Century politics...

M.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 24 June, 2011, 09:19:57 AM
Well.. I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 24 June, 2011, 09:58:08 AM
Just turn her over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 24 June, 2011, 10:28:08 AM
Quote from: Mikey on 24 June, 2011, 09:05:06 AM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 23 June, 2011, 10:06:08 PM

she of the 20 something arse and the 40 something face.  What an enigma.

Over here in the Emerald Isle (and maybe other places) she would be described as a "1690" - 16 from the back, 90 from the front. It's also significant date for those interested in 17th Century politics...

M.

:lol:  Funny phrase.

Yep, aware of the year (if we're talking about the Boyne?). I did the touristy thing and went there when on hols once.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 24 June, 2011, 10:36:32 AM
I'm slightly irritated becasue I had managed to avoid any contact with this person, and now I have seen a photo thanks to this thread!
Thankfully though, I have never seen its arse, and am not sure if she is the creature on the left or right of the picture.

(Trying really hard not to rant about over-privileged shits)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 June, 2011, 10:53:21 AM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 24 June, 2011, 10:36:32 AM... am not sure if she is the creature on the left or right of the picture.

Phew, glad it's not just me that couldn't pick either of them out of a line-up.  Last I looked 'Pippa' was a foster mother on Home and Away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 24 June, 2011, 11:21:58 AM


(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/__-Af3PpH1lU/TU_ZeZir7aI/AAAAAAAACB0/l6TQJuaeWAk/s1600/_40867353_rikyoungones203.jpg)

boooorrrrringggggggg!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 24 June, 2011, 11:29:27 AM
I ordered a CD online from Amazon.co.uk over four weeks ago. I received an email from them a couple of weeks later to confirm that it had been shipped out to me, followed a couple of weeks after that by another email asking me to rate the product. Problem is: I never received it! I've already checked with the postal sorting office and they were unable to help me. I've now come to the conclusion that some miscreant in the building in which I live is stealing people's post, that is anything which looks like it could be sold.

Not only that, but one of the lads in the flat above me received a bank debit card in the post - which he never applied for in the first place! - but no follow on letter giving the PIN number for the card. We can only assume that somebody in the building tried to pull a fast one by falsely applying for the card on his behalf, and it's only dumb luck that my mate intercepted the card leaving the scumbag with just the Pin number and nothing else.

Our suspicions at the moment are centred on a new bloke who moved into the building a few weeks ago. This is down to the fact that prior to him moving in we never had any problems like this, and also the guy has "DODGY MOTHERFUCKER" written all over him.

Now I'm a fairly liberal, easy-going, live-and-let-live kind of chap for the most part, but when it comes to stealing people's post, well frankly, I think it's a hanging offence and anyone who engages in such activities is about the lowest, most miserable piece of pond-life that you can get. Thing is though, how do we actually prove that he's the villain in question? I'm generally in work when the post does arrive so it's not as if I can actually stake out the letter-box and hallway in the hope of catching him out. One possible I idea that comes to mind is to ask the Landlord to install some sort of hidden camera in the hallway, but I'm not sure how he'd react to that. Suggestions from the board much appreciated!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 24 June, 2011, 11:37:38 AM
@Paddykafka-

Carefully place a dog turd in a plastic container within a box and jiffy bag that up, post it to yourself and chuckle when it never arrives.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 June, 2011, 11:51:25 AM
Quote from: paddykafka on 24 June, 2011, 11:29:27 AM
and also the guy has "DODGY MOTHERFUCKER" written all over him.

Now THAT's an inadvisable tattoo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 24 June, 2011, 11:51:48 AM
Post Office keep safe service, a word with the postie snd a baseball bat? 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 24 June, 2011, 01:55:41 PM
I have each and every issue of 2000AD, the megazine, crisis, starlord, tornado, scream, the sci fi specials, winter specials, annuals, yearbooks, posterprogs, toxics, plus near complete runs of battle, eagle, bullet, and piles of warlords, victors, rangers, look & learns, jets, and tigers. And yet i can find nothing to read. How is this possible?

Plus, a short shufty through the piles of books on, around and on top of the bookcase in the dining room revealed one hundred and thirty six hardback or paperback collected editions of 2000AD/battle stuff i already have in their original format upstairs. Not a good time for my wife to casually ask if i really need all of them.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 24 June, 2011, 04:30:24 PM
You need a nice health purge!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 June, 2011, 05:45:26 PM
The book I have been eagerly anticipating all week arrived today, I bought it from an Amazon market place seller who described it's condition as "Very Good"

I would describe it's condition as "Minging Biohazard"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 24 June, 2011, 06:08:00 PM
Cars been in the garage for 2 weeks cus the dolts keep ordering the wrong part. The courtesy car they have blessed me with is a bloody Panda and to add insult to injury some daft twat has just went into the back off it. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 June, 2011, 06:26:24 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 24 June, 2011, 01:55:41 PM
I have each and every issue of 2000AD, the megazine, crisis, starlord, tornado, scream, the sci fi specials, winter specials, annuals, yearbooks, posterprogs, toxics, plus near complete runs of battle, eagle, bullet, and piles of warlords, victors, rangers, look & learns, jets, and tigers. And yet i can find nothing to read. How is this possible?


SBT

I have the same problem sometimes with what music to listen to.Stacks and stacks and stacks and stacks of CDs yet i dont want to listen to any of them yet i want to listen to something yet i dont know what*.

*I dont know what i want but i want it now.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 24 June, 2011, 06:43:14 PM
Quote from: judgefett on 24 June, 2011, 11:37:38 AM
@Paddykafka-

Carefully place a dog turd in a plastic container within a box and jiffy bag that up, post it to yourself and chuckle when it never arrives.

That's going a bit far. I would suggest a more calm and measured approach, such as writing a letter to yourself, a letter containing a random piece of text translated into Arabic Abjad, then sign it off in English with the phrase 'DEATH TO THE WEST'. Sprinkle some talcum powder/salt/flour/all 3 in the envelope, that will put the sh*ts up him. Bait your letter with an old USB key on which you've installed a virus.

I learned that last bit when I did a year working for a Large Online Retailer's Fraud Department. Needless to say I thoroughly I despise flim-flam's and scheisters
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 24 June, 2011, 07:04:57 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 24 June, 2011, 11:29:27 AM
Suggestions from the board much appreciated!

I would have a would with him about it and act as though you are not suspicious of him and ask him if he has lost or not received any post lately.That way you are not making any accusations but i would watch his reactions very closely for signs of guilt and see if he is lying.

If you wanted to go further than that i would go on to say that there used to be a problem with post going missing in the building and the culprit who was a resident was dealt with severely so warn him to be careful of his post going missing.

The vast majority of people are not able to hide guilt and are terrible liars.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 June, 2011, 10:21:01 PM
Quote from: Emp on 24 June, 2011, 06:08:00 PM
Cars been in the garage for 2 weeks cus the dolts keep ordering the wrong part. The courtesy car they have blessed me with is a bloody Panda and to add insult to injury some daft twat has just went into the back off it. ::)

Surely that can only improve a Panda?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 25 June, 2011, 01:35:01 AM
my cars not the bloody panda...thats the shite they have me roamong about in
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 25 June, 2011, 01:37:57 AM
Improves th Panda...Not neccesarily my shoulder...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 June, 2011, 09:04:50 AM
I've had to drive a Panda on a number of occasions and they truly are awful things - the handling of a shopping trolley with the engine out of a Lego train.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 June, 2011, 03:22:01 PM
After an expensive phone call to the Talk Talk helpline, I've been advised that I can no longer view my e-mails with Firefox, I have to use Internet Explorer, which is a pain in the arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 June, 2011, 03:28:59 PM
How about using Thunderbird, the Mozilla email client?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 June, 2011, 03:31:12 PM
How does that work then - would it mean a new e-mail address? I use the email on my ISP (...@tiscali.co.uk) and it's shit but I've no idea how to set up a different one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 June, 2011, 03:35:55 PM
Nope, you download and install Thunderbird and then set it up to automatically download your emails for you - you'll never have to visit your Talk-Talk or Gmail page ever again! (I'm actually writing this in the browser window of Thunderbird right now.)

http://www.mozilla.org/#feature-thunderbird

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 June, 2011, 03:57:11 PM
Cool, I'll look into it, cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 26 June, 2011, 08:57:29 PM
My brother started mowing the lawn only for an entire family of partly shredded mice to drop out of the mower. Swallowing back our revulsion/horror, we finished off the twitching survivors with a hammer, cleared away the bodies and while I finished the grass he changed his bloody clothes and took a shower. Said shower backed up our dodgy drains and within minutes the front porch was flooded with stinking sewage water. NO cleaning stuff in the house (the day of 'the big shop' is tomorrow) so I trudged to Co-Op for rubber gloves and cloths, surrounded by smug, smiling people getting in beer for their evening BBQs. Forty minutes of rather revolting cleaning followed, in the baking sun. Both sweating buckets by the end but unable to take a shower - oh the irony!

But my ear finally popped today after days of tinnitus brought on by a head-cold, so I can't help being in a good mood regardless.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 June, 2011, 09:47:00 PM
Jeezus, where the Hell do you live? The Ravenglade Estate??? :-&
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 27 June, 2011, 11:19:09 AM
It's going to be 35 degrees centigrade [or is it Farenheit] where I work today. Sweatsville or what? Not looking forward to work today but who does?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 27 June, 2011, 11:50:14 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 26 June, 2011, 09:47:00 PM
Jeezus, where the Hell do you live? The Ravenglade Estate???

Thats what I was thinking  :o

had to stop stripping bloody woodchip of the ceiling four fifths of the way through as it was sooo late last night and I had to get the car and stripper (oooh-er!) back for this morning...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 June, 2011, 03:31:47 PM
Can someone explain why denim jeans, which are pretty much the most durable, long lasting bit of everyday clothing we wear, have pockets made from fucking tissue paper? I've had a pair about two weeks and already small change is sliding down my legs at the checkout. Ridiculous.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 June, 2011, 03:43:53 PM
Cut your nails and stop playing with your balls. Sorted.

But yes, i have the same problem at the moment.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2011, 03:53:55 PM
Change, pah! you should throw that away and just keep crisp notes  ;)

I just went down town to collect two printed T-Shirts from a new shop that I have found, only to see that they have printed the designs onto the wrong sized shirts. I was not impressed, especially as it's so bloody hot.

I also had another episode in Smiths, when I collected the latest issue of Comic Heroes. It wasn't on the shelves and so I had to get the manager out, AGAIN! Luckily for him, before it heated up a customer had heard what was going on and had seen it on the shelves. Guess where it was............................that's right with the toddlers fucking comics! What a FUCKING JOKE  >:D


P.S. with a bit of luck when I collect the corrected tops in the week they might give me the wrong tops for FREE. Every cloud and all that!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 June, 2011, 04:06:54 PM
I meant to text you about comic heroes yesterday, cf, as it was in my whs. That's right, on a sunday. And it was in with the younglings comics too- and they still had two copies of the last one on the shelf in the proper place. Jock Dredd poster with this one, chaps.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2011, 04:12:00 PM
Do you walk down all those steps to get yours, you know the steps I mean  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 June, 2011, 04:20:59 PM
What, you mean that little flight of steps that i run up and down every morning and night, barely getting out of breath, but which you found so difficult? Yes, actually i hop up and down them.

Actually, im not sure which ones you mean, as there are two sets of steps down to the old town. The first is down besides the caves and you'd have to walk up over the west hill to get to mine, and the second lot are treacherous underfoot, smell of piss, and youre likely to get stabbed if you brave them at night. They come out by the cafe and lift, sort of.

But no, i walk into town the other way.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2011, 04:23:30 PM
The ones that go down to Morrisons. Nice and dark with lots of overhanging bushes!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 June, 2011, 04:30:42 PM
Oh, those! 'dogshit steps', they're known as. Yes, they're a bastard, and no i avoid them if at all possible. Did the mental dog in the garden on your right (as you go up) try to kill you?
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2011, 04:33:15 PM
It was at 03:50'ish that day so it may have been asleep, just like you  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 27 June, 2011, 06:07:13 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 27 June, 2011, 04:30:42 PM
Oh, those! 'dogshit steps', they're known as. Yes, they're a bastard, and no i avoid them if at all possible. Did the mental dog in the garden on your right (as you go up) try to kill you?
SBT

Those are the steps that i had to run up as fast as possible as i was being chased by half a dozen geezers when i was about 16.

Those are nothing compared to running up an escalator that was going down in the London Underground.Thats what i did once and it was a long escalator and for a minute or two i was running on the spot which was neither up or down.

Today where i was working the neighbours on one side were sunbathing on their patio and listening to music which unfortunately was Beyonce.I didnt know who it was at first but it was fucking awful and it sounded like someone you get on a TV talent show of the kind where they get voted off.Terrible but luckily it only went on for 45 minutes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 June, 2011, 06:12:47 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 June, 2011, 06:07:13 PM...which unfortunately was Beyonce.I didnt know who it was at first but it was fucking awful and it sounded like someone you get on a TV talent show of the kind where they get voted off.T

Too bootilicious for you?  You could do worse than Beyonce.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 June, 2011, 09:14:38 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 27 June, 2011, 06:12:47 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 27 June, 2011, 06:07:13 PM...which unfortunately was Beyonce.I didnt know who it was at first but it was fucking awful and it sounded like someone you get on a TV talent show of the kind where they get voted off.T

Too bootilicious for you?  You could do worse than Beyonce.

Yeah, I saw her Glasto set on telly and it was okay. You've really got the daggers out for ol' Bouncy!

(I would have posted this after your Glastonbury comment, but I made the mistake of coming out of that thread and now I can't find it again, as it disappears from the active topics list. Grrr!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 27 June, 2011, 10:00:33 PM
....because for the last few years each time we have a week away we come back to bad news. I think I might give up on holidays.

This time we got back to find out that Mrs Albions brother is in hospital and it doesn't sound too good and my best mates Mum, who has been fighting cancer for a while, has just been told there is no more they can do for her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 27 June, 2011, 11:05:51 PM
the post ofice is scruing with me I know my mum says Im mad but they fucking are I order 6 games all on the same day I apereachit that they were all sent out on dirfent days but its now been over a weak sins I recived the post and Im missing 2 of my games and whats worse this is not a first the post ofice does this all the time I knwo they stock pile my packages as they only ever come on fridays and teuesdays which is realy odd when you sart recive ing 8 dirfent packagies ordered some time on dirfent weaks and days all arive at once if I get them all turn up tomoro Im going to scream at my postman as this is geting very anoying. ARRRRRRRR >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 28 June, 2011, 12:16:52 AM
I had gotten to the bottom of the six flights of stairs this morning before I noticed that my front tire had suffered a quite extraordinary blowout over the weekend while it was sitting in the hall.

And it's only know that I've realised I haven't changed it yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 28 June, 2011, 02:57:55 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2011, 03:53:55 PM

I also had another episode in Smiths, when I collected the latest issue of Comic Heroes. It wasn't on the shelves and so I had to get the manager out, AGAIN! Luckily for him, before it heated up a customer had heard what was going on and had seen it on the shelves. Guess where it was............................that's right with the toddlers fucking comics! What a FUCKING JOKE  >:D

I had something similar happen when picking up 2000 AD today. They were'nt in their usual place, so I thought maybe they'd all been bought, what with being out for 6 days, etc. I went off for a wander and turned round, and... there it was. On a completely different shelf. Not the ones on the sides of the shop but a small rack...

Not much of an impediment, because at least I found it. It doesn't really help draw readers doing that though. I wouldn't have thought to look on that particular rack. I found it completely by accident.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 June, 2011, 11:22:39 AM
Not really an impediment, but we dont have a thread for things that just make you go :/

Ive just found out that the house me and my lady lived in, in dublin, was sold a year after we moved out, for €9.3m, and made all the papers. Halcam court on pembroke road, and it's now luxury apartments.

When we lived there it was a damp, dark, lunatic-infested hellhole, and i now regret all the work i did on it to improve it for whoever came after us.

It was just across the road from andrea corr though.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 June, 2011, 01:00:39 PM
QuoteIve just found out that the house me and my lady lived in, in dublin, was sold a year after we moved out, for €9.3m, and made all the papers. Halcam court on pembroke road, and it's now luxury apartments.

I wouldn't fret too much - it was bought by Gerry Gannon, the 'man in the hat', who owes NAMA (the state (mis)managed 'bad bank' agency for property loans in default) €1 billion last I looked, and Halcom Court probably worth a third of what he paid for it, has likely been mysteriously transferred to his wife's name, and is probably heading towards one of the ever-increasing numbers of profitable fires round that way.  Poor sod had to sell his jet and his helicopter, I ask you what kind of life is that for a man. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 29 June, 2011, 06:37:23 PM
The problem i have which has been an annoyance for while now is that i cant find a knife that i have had for a very long time.It is a diving knife that has a 9.5 " inch long blade with a serrated edge.It hasnt left the house recently or not for a good while and it has vanished or else it is somewhere that i havent looked yet but where that place is i have no idea as i have checked everywhere.As far as i knew it was always kept in the drawer in the kitchen along with cooking knives and various cooking utensils.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 June, 2011, 09:45:32 PM
My Mother had her Email account "Hacked" and could access it.

I went round earlier tonight to try and sort it out for her and it seems that all you need to know to access and reset the password for a Talk Talk / Tiscali account is the account holder's email address and date of birth :o.

Thoughtfully, they will send you an email telling you that your account password has been reset, but as you have already lost the account by that point and can't actually access your email...... ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 June, 2011, 10:00:37 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 28 June, 2011, 12:16:52 AM
I had gotten to the bottom of the six flights of stairs this morning before I noticed that my front tire had suffered a quite extraordinary blowout over the weekend while it was sitting in the hall.

And it's only know that I've realised I haven't changed it yet.
And then! When I got round to changing it, it turns out the spare inner tube I've been riding around with for the last six months has a bloody great hole in it. Of course I only find that out after I've put it all back together.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 29 June, 2011, 10:07:09 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 29 June, 2011, 06:37:23 PM
The problem i have which has been an annoyance for while now is that i cant find a knife that i have had for a very long time.It is a diving knife that has a 9.5 " inch long blade with a serrated edge.It hasnt left the house recently or not for a good while and it has vanished or else it is somewhere that i havent looked yet but where that place is i have no idea as i have checked everywhere.As far as i knew it was always kept in the drawer in the kitchen along with cooking knives and various cooking utensils.

Ye could build a super-powerful-electro-magnet,  strap it to the top of a remote-controlled car, then rally that bitch 'round yer gaff. Ye'll find it in no time

Or ye could pray to St. Anthony

....I'm not really helping am I?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 June, 2011, 12:27:56 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 29 June, 2011, 09:45:32 PM
My Mother had her Email account "Hacked" and could access it.

I went round earlier tonight to try and sort it out for her and it seems that all you need to know to access and reset the password for a Talk Talk / Tiscali account is the account holder's email address and date of birth :o.

Thoughtfully, they will send you an email telling you that your account password has been reset, but as you have already lost the account by that point and can't actually access your email...... ::)

That's worrying. I took Shark's advice and downloaded Mozilla Thunderbird as Talk Talk's e-mail won't work on the latest Firefox (Thanks again BTW - works great!) but worryingly I got this message during installation:

"WARNING:
IMAP.TISCALI DOES NOT USE ENCRYPTION
SMTP.TISCALI.CO.UK DOES NOT USE ENCRYPTION
Thunderbird can allow you to get your mail using the provided configurations. However, you should contact your administrator or email provider regarding these improper connections."

Further emails to the support people just generate standard replies about "so, you're having trouble accessing your e-mail account..."

Seems like security isn't their strong point. Should I be worried? There's nothing useful in my emails but I'm concerned about Paypal

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 June, 2011, 12:42:36 AM
DDD, there are many email alternatives. You don't have to stick with what your ISP gives you. Some good alternatives here:

http://email.about.com/od/freeemailreviews/tp/free_email.htm

Use one of these for Paypal and such and your Talk Talk thing for stuff that doesn't matter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 01 July, 2011, 10:23:48 PM
Fucking buggeration. Both my kids have headlice; which we discovered at 9:45 tonight when they came down moaning they couldnt sleep because they were itchy. So annoyingly, we have to apply nytol and change all the bedding. Then we sit down to watch psychoville series two, and find the dvd player is knackered and wont work. It's been on the blink for ages, but has finally died. Shitballs.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 01 July, 2011, 10:36:32 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 01 July, 2011, 10:23:48 PM
Then we sit down to watch psychoville series two, and find the dvd player is knackered and wont work. It's been on the blink for ages, but has finally died. Shitballs.
SBT

Thats the most annoying thing ever and its always at the worst possible time.I had a portable stereo and a DVD player that had minds of their own as in when they wanted to function properly and they both met a very unpleasent end as i ran out of patience with them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 02 July, 2011, 08:04:22 AM
And to make it immesurably worse, I wake up this morning and tell my eldest that he won't be able to watch DVDs this weekend, and he just gives me THAT LOOK and says "It's okay daddy, I'll just watch them through the PS3".

Why the SPUG didn't I think of that? ARGH.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 03 July, 2011, 05:51:13 PM
I dreamt that i was talking to Tony Blair this morning.I cant recall what the context was or what was said but Blair was sort of oily or sweaty and his voice was exactly the same as in reality along with him grinning again exactly the same as in reality.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 01:49:33 AM
I've known for some time that the roof was missing a few slates at the back of the house and that I would eventually have to get it fixed because sooner or later the roof would start leaking; I just didn't know where I was going to find a few hundred quid to get the job done. Well, it can't be put off any longer: a water penetration stain has now appeared on the landing ceiling and in the corner of the guest bedroom. A visual inspection of the problem carried out from atop a neat pile of bricks at the end of the neighbour's garden reveals that there is a gap in our roof which resembles a letter box. No wonder there has been rain coming in. I'm sure it wasn't like that when we first noticed the problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 July, 2011, 01:54:46 AM
Bung up the hole with cheese.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 July, 2011, 02:04:19 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 01:49:33 AM...there is a gap in our roof which resembles a letter box.

Once a postman....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 July, 2011, 02:15:14 AM
Have you checked your attic for immigrants?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 11:03:07 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 04 July, 2011, 02:04:19 AM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 01:49:33 AM...there is a gap in our roof which resembles a letter box.

Once a postman....

It's like you can see into my very soul.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Peter Wolf on 04 July, 2011, 06:22:56 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 01:49:33 AM
I've known for some time that the roof was missing a few slates at the back of the house and that I would eventually have to get it fixed because sooner or later the roof would start leaking; I just didn't know where I was going to find a few hundred quid to get the job done. Well, it can't be put off any longer: a water penetration stain has now appeared on the landing ceiling and in the corner of the guest bedroom. A visual inspection of the problem carried out from atop a neat pile of bricks at the end of the neighbour's garden reveals that there is a gap in our roof which resembles a letter box. No wonder there has been rain coming in. I'm sure it wasn't like that when we first noticed the problem.

It shouldnt cost you a few hundred quid to replace a few missing/broken slates as slates/tiles are cheap and it shouldnt take anyone more than an hour or two to replace them presuming that its accessable by ladder.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 04 July, 2011, 06:31:34 PM
Quote from: Peter Wolf on 04 July, 2011, 06:22:56 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 01:49:33 AM
I've known for some time that the roof was missing a few slates at the back of the house and that I would eventually have to get it fixed because sooner or later the roof would start leaking; I just didn't know where I was going to find a few hundred quid to get the job done. Well, it can't be put off any longer: a water penetration stain has now appeared on the landing ceiling and in the corner of the guest bedroom. A visual inspection of the problem carried out from atop a neat pile of bricks at the end of the neighbour's garden reveals that there is a gap in our roof which resembles a letter box. No wonder there has been rain coming in. I'm sure it wasn't like that when we first noticed the problem.

It shouldnt cost you a few hundred quid to replace a few missing/broken slates as slates/tiles are cheap and it shouldnt take anyone more than an hour or two to replace them presuming that its accessable by ladder.


Have you checked to see if this is covered by your home insurance?

I lost a couple of slates from my last house and I was covered, they even arranged for the roofer and plasterer to come out and do the repairs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 04 July, 2011, 08:21:38 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 04 July, 2011, 01:49:33 AM
I've known for some time that the roof was missing a few slates at the back of the house and that I would eventually have to get it fixed because sooner or later the roof would start leaking; I just didn't know where I was going to find a few hundred quid to get the job done. Well, it can't be put off any longer: a water penetration stain has now appeared on the landing ceiling and in the corner of the guest bedroom. A visual inspection of the problem carried out from atop a neat pile of bricks at the end of the neighbour's garden reveals that there is a gap in our roof which resembles a letter box. No wonder there has been rain coming in. I'm sure it wasn't like that when we first noticed the problem.

Probably the work of Magpies. The house opposite us had about six of the bastards vandalising the tiles a few years ago. It was amazing to watch though.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 July, 2011, 08:48:03 PM
Dammit, just did my first VAT Return wrong. It's all too clever for me - turns out that input actually means money that's gone out and output actually means money that's come in. Am I facing a fine, or might I even go to prison?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 04 July, 2011, 09:32:54 PM
Twenty years, creep!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 05 July, 2011, 01:34:11 PM
If you've seen the film "Brazil" then you'll know to anticipate a large, circular hole being drilled into your roof and Tax Inspector shock-troops leaping down from it into your living-room to arrest you. Be sure to ask for a receipt for your receipt and make bloody sure that your sirname is not "Buttle" nor, for that matter, "Tuttle".

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 05 July, 2011, 04:25:51 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 04 July, 2011, 06:31:34 PM
Have you checked to see if this is covered by your home insurance?

Thanks. I've looked into it. It's not covered. It'd be a gamble on a surveyor agreeing it's storm damage and not slippage. If he disagrees that's a £160 surveyor's fee on top. I think I can get it done fairly cheaply through contacts in the building trade. There are four separate roofing jobs I need to get looked into anyway. May as well get them all sorted out together.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 July, 2011, 12:50:22 PM
I was thinking of heading into town to see Akira at the pictures but it turns out it starts at one and no half past as I thought. To get there in time I'd have had to cycle but it's pissing down.

Oh well, I can stay in read SVK and watch the Tour de France instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 July, 2011, 04:06:30 PM
Had a letter from EON today saying that they wanted to put my direct debit up from £70 to £88 a month. Obviously I got straight on the phone and asked them why they thought this was going to happen, especially as they had only just paid me back over £150 due to being in credit so much. The woman on the phone said they can't reduce it anymore (like they have had to do every year since I have been with them), as it's new company bollocks. So I said, "I tell you what, just cancel my direct debit, I'm gone. Each time a firm like yours messes me around, especially as it's no fault of mine I leave and I can guarantee you I won't ever be back, even if I have to pay more at another firm!"

I honestly can't believe it, greedy fuckers. I had to explain to her that with the money handed back to me already and the new extra added onto the DD, I would be paying over £370 extra a year. That's well over a third of my bill now and even with the rises due I would be nowhere near that. She couldn't grasp simple maths and so I felt my time with eon was at an end. It seems as if my password was true in the end.....ripoffmerchants  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 July, 2011, 04:20:20 PM
I just logged onto my account to get the usage and all that bollocks to help with who I switch to and I've noticed that my energy consumption has gone down by 28.7% in total comparing 2011 to 2010. I wish I had looked at that before my phone call  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 July, 2011, 08:35:28 PM
I had to join itunes today, just so Caz can watch the Foo Fighters at 21:00 tonight  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 11 July, 2011, 08:42:31 PM
I  missed University Challenge tonight and I'll have to wait some hours until it's on iPlayer. Life is hard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 July, 2011, 08:57:39 PM
My Daughter's class were shown a video today about the dangers of playing on building sites and now I can't get her to go to sleep because she is traumatised by images of heavy machinery and kids falling off ladders.

Just how big a problem do we have with four and five year olds getting injured playing on construction sites anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 11 July, 2011, 09:04:31 PM
No way. That's terrible. Reminds me of the old safety ads that were on tv when I was a kid, about the little boy falling into a barrel of water on his grandad's farm and drowning, or the kid climbing the pylon to get his football back and getting electrocuted. They were scary ads man!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 11 July, 2011, 09:12:04 PM
Reminds mw off an add in the 70's in Norn Irland with a couple of kids playing on waste ground, finding a rattling thermos flask and open it ....BOOM...now that was a H&S advert!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 11 July, 2011, 09:18:17 PM
Quote from: Emp on 11 July, 2011, 09:12:04 PM
Reminds mw off an add in the 70's in Norn Irland with a couple of kids playing on waste ground, finding a rattling thermos flask and open it ....BOOM...now that was a H&S advert!


Remember that too, a warning about unexploded ordnance, had a bomb disposal bloke in a crater at the end didn't it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 11 July, 2011, 09:19:46 PM
Went looking for some of those ads on youtube and found this one...I remember this used to scare the bejesus out of me...! Still does!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sg6IVUvVsAs
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 11 July, 2011, 09:20:42 PM
Think so all i know was i never picked up a thermos that was laying about....EVER!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 11 July, 2011, 09:26:12 PM
There was also one of some guy supposed to be death watching a bloke stagger out of a pub and drive home.......can't find it or the Dave Allan sketch that parodies it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 11 July, 2011, 09:26:55 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 July, 2011, 08:57:39 PM

Just how big a problem do we have with four and five year olds getting injured playing on construction sites anyway.

Quite big - I live on a building site at the moment as it's an ongoing build , and almost every evening there are kids playing on the site. The eldest being maybe 10 and the youngest around 4 or 5. The little fuckers are just asking for something to happen to them but in all honesty , it'll serve them right. The older kids should know better , let alone bring their younger siblings.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 11 July, 2011, 09:37:46 PM
Thinking back now, I remember when I was akid, a bunch of us used to go and fuck around in the lower half of our estate, which was only being built at the time. Climbing the scaffoldings, walking along the tops of the walls of house shells, right where the roof was going to go....mad stuff actually, now I think about it. I wouldnt do it now!Also, I remember messing around there on my own one night and having a fall into the foundation area of a new house, rightly fucked myself up. It got very dark very quick and I had to try and drag myself out of there and hobble home, crying the whole way. That was absolutely shit and I'd forgotten all about it til now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 11 July, 2011, 09:44:27 PM


Same thing happened to Rico(1) Dredd.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Misanthrope on 11 July, 2011, 10:00:34 PM
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 11 July, 2011, 09:44:27 PM


Same thing happened to Rico(1) Dredd.

What, he injured himself playing on a building site? Was it when they were building MC 1?

(I do know what you are talking about, really.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 11 July, 2011, 10:14:08 PM
HISTORY LESSON:

BLOOD CADETS


(http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff248/burlearth/DREDD05.jpg)

(http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff248/burlearth/DREDD06.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 July, 2011, 10:22:26 PM
I often forget just how much I love Simon's art on Blood Cadets - absolutely superb.  And that line: "We better go report ourselves for fighting". What a great story that was.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 11 July, 2011, 10:24:06 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 July, 2011, 08:57:39 PM

Just how big a problem do we have with four and five year olds getting injured playing on construction sites anyway.

I was in school with someone who, at the age of seven, broke into a building site to play and lost a toe when a pile of bricks collaped onto his foot.

Got a sizeable compensation from the builders, and his parents eventually moved onto that estate too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 11 July, 2011, 10:26:49 PM
David Mitchell's younger than me. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 14 July, 2011, 10:36:49 AM
The guy who sits at the desk next to me at work is constantly cracking his knuckles. My word it's annoying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 14 July, 2011, 12:35:53 PM
Work now owe me almost £500 in unpaid expenses, the twats have been fobbing me off for weeks saying that they are being processed but have now finally admitted that they have lost them and I need to start the whole sorry, drawn out process of claiming them from scratch.

I am about to go away with work for another 2 weeks and will probably run up another £1500 on top of that, cue more misery trying to get it paid back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 July, 2011, 01:10:47 PM
Stay home and tell them you lost the instructions telling you to go away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 14 July, 2011, 07:55:50 PM
After a minor car accident about 3 weeks ago, the insurance company now tell me my car is a 'Class C Write-off'. The damage didn't look too bad to me, so I may look into getting it repaired myself, if possible. Anyone with any experiance of such matters...? :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 14 July, 2011, 08:10:12 PM
Would that not make your car uninsurable though, just a thought!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 16 July, 2011, 03:16:16 PM
Underwriting head on...

Category C means that the insurance company do not believe that it is economical for them to repair the car. If you request the salvage and repair the vehicle yourself it will be insurable, though check with the insurers if they would require sight of a new MOT following repairs. Most insurers will accept category C.

Category A (desctruction required) and Category B (spares only) are the uninsurable ones.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 16 July, 2011, 03:50:57 PM
Yep.  The repair centre have said its OK to drive, but unsecurable, as the boot no longer locks. It looks like I may scrap the bleeder and get another anyway. Put the grand or so they have given me towards something else.  Maybe get part finance? ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 21 July, 2011, 04:19:40 PM
our recliner broke ages ago ,a wire came out at the bottom of the motor so we contacted the insurance after much faffing we contacted dfs who didnt give a shit no surprise there... the insurance have been messing ages and wanted us to pick oone from their choice of shop. we didnt like so the wife asked if we could just have the money thankyou...they said yes £400 thankyou very much, now i get a phone call saying cos it looks like a manufacturing fault we'd have to pay and basically they wont... i explained theyd had all this information months ago and we'd been promised the money...
so,i'm stuck with a recliner that wont and has a split in the front (another fault) they havent even adressed.
time to look at changing insueres methinks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 21 July, 2011, 04:28:48 PM
... because due to needing a specific set up for my internet access at work I am being steadily left behind when it comes to using things. I tried to upgrade the browser last week so I could use Google plus but it royally knacked a few things so I was ver yhappy to be able to restore my older version. Now it looks like Blogger is no longer displaying properly when it comes to writing posts. I can't add links or pics or anything. Big bags of Bum! Reckon I'm going to be forced into getting a smart phone and using that for it in the near future.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 July, 2011, 10:44:49 PM
Because I can't find the "Things that make you :-/" thread, and because I've just seen the advert for the new series of Dragon's Den.

WHAT THE FUCK is that new woman in it?? What are those RIDICULOUS shoulder pads and face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle all about?? And that wig?? Jesus CHRIST!! She hasn't said a word yet and I already want to see her committed.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 July, 2011, 09:50:51 AM
On these automated Customer Service numbers, you have to use the keypad to input your account number, customer number, reference number, date-of-birth and password before speaking to anyone. Once you get through to someone, they ask you for all the same info all over again. Gah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 July, 2011, 12:06:38 PM
Just write to them instead.

Here's a good tip for annoying people who ring you up and ask you "security questions". Ask them security questions first. (What's your full name; job title; direct contact number; line manager's full name; line manager's job title; line manager's direct contact number; name of the department you're working for; contact number of same, etc., etc.). Then politely say "thank you for that, now how can I help you?", when they then try to ask you security questions just say "I'm sorry, I don't discuss sensitive information over the telephone but if you'd like to write me a letter I'll certainly read what you have to say. My address? Well, if you haven't got that already you shouldn't be contacting me, should you? Good day."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 22 July, 2011, 12:18:15 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 July, 2011, 12:06:38 PM
Just write to them instead.

Here's a good tip for annoying people who ring you up and ask you "security questions". Ask them security questions first. (What's your full name; job title; direct contact number; line manager's full name; line manager's job title; line manager's direct contact number; name of the department you're working for; contact number of same, etc., etc.). Then politely say "thank you for that, now how can I help you?", when they then try to ask you security questions just say "I'm sorry, I don't discuss sensitive information over the telephone but if you'd like to write me a letter I'll certainly read what you have to say. My address? Well, if you haven't got that already you shouldn't be contacting me, should you? Good day."

Unfortunately they ask you all that stuff only when you want something, so cowed we must fall into line  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 July, 2011, 12:38:55 PM
I generally find that I don't want anything so badly that I can't get it by letter. At least with a letter you have a record - unless you record your own 'phone calls. They sometimes get very uncomfortable if you tell them that you're recording the call for security purposes as well.  And you can still ask your security questions.

Use their own tactics against them (put them on hold while you put the kettle on, about 3 minutes is about the limit) just for fun.  Impede the buggers back, I say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 22 July, 2011, 02:34:54 PM
You know, just to bounce off the last half dozen posts, we've been getting an aaaawful lot of telesales calls lately.

I know they're bogus, because the caller asks for me by name, then says 'you recently completed a market research survey for us--' at which point I cut them dead and say (truthfully) 'No I didn't', before simply putting the 'phone down.

We had about three calls form the same people like that. After the last one, I expanded my response to 'No I didn't. Don't call us again.'

And ever since, it's been nice and quiet...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 July, 2011, 03:43:50 PM
"If you telephone me or my family again I will report you to the police under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 23 July, 2011, 11:45:26 AM
Since my guys are out, i just jumped into the shower at work, to save myself a bath tonight. Was wash wash, shave shave shave. However, just as i'd begun to shave my head (four days since last one, beginnings of a frasier crane), i remembered i didnt have any balm with me. Bugger. However, now im out and running a hand up my neck to my hairline, i appear to have accidentally given myself the beginnings of a david sourbutts. Shit!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 23 July, 2011, 07:55:44 PM
Prompted by a posting on here I decided to get my cholestorol tested, having been high ten years ago but done nothing due to being alergic to statins.

Glad i did, turns out my BP is too high, pre hyper-tension, apparently and my chol has risen far too much.  Gotta be seen by heart person now and be under the heart nurse at the docs to get proper medication for both BP and chol.  It's annoying. I'm not overweight, i have a reasonably good diet (but like a few treats i guess) and I keep fit and exercise pretty much every day in some way.  I guess none of it can entirely change things if you have a tendency to this.

Not good but then, better to sort it now than die in 10 years time, as a friend of mine sadly did.

Thanks for prompting me to do so Rog69.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 23 July, 2011, 08:15:17 PM
Hrmph. Going to have a pleasant hangover this afternoon, when a blow a fuse at my mate over tobacco. I was after him all day the other week and he was avoiding me or had no time. He finally tells me he's got none. I feel cheap. I tell him its okay. I should really be dependent on him anyway. Slightly huffy but it was a way of getting over it. I needed a smoke at the time, see?

So he sends me a text yesterday.  I ignore it. He calls me today all upset about the dependency remark. Its not his fault, he had none.  Brings up his girlfriend. I did not want to talk about his girlfriend. I say I don't care about his fucking girlfriend.

"Nah, you don't care about anyone nor anything," he says.

He calls me up to have a go about not picking up tobacco off him. I say I'll pick it up from a shop from now on. More reliable like British gas costs more but is more reliable and I'm independent. He ends up characters assassinating me over the phone!  I said vI didn't care about his girlfriend and he puts that out as I don't care about anything or anyone. Makes me feel even more cheap! I have to play nice 'cos the old cun* plays music on a wednesday night with me at the pub. Its a spiteful person I'm dealing with here and I end the phone call showing my true colours. Asking him, how does he like my true fucking colours? Don't deal with black market bums kids, they'll have you  looking like a bitch when you've got a problem about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 23 July, 2011, 09:55:34 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 21 July, 2011, 10:44:49 PM
Because I can't find the "Things that make you :-/" thread, and because I've just seen the advert for the new series of Dragon's Den.

WHAT THE FUCK is that new woman in it?? What are those RIDICULOUS shoulder pads and face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle all about?? And that wig?? Jesus CHRIST!! She hasn't said a word yet and I already want to see her committed.

SBT

:lol: :lol: :lol:
I saw the trailer too and wondered what the hell was that?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 24 July, 2011, 03:54:55 PM
Aaaaaaaaaand that is the last straw with the window cleaner. He is no great shakes on the fundamental aspects of his job (and it is bordering on charity now), he even once turned up without a bucket because someone had stolen his and he'd never got round to buying a new one, but since splitting from a more competent team he has been relying on his idiot son who keeps trying the brilliant scam of coming around to collect the window cleaning money, despite his dad telling us not to pay him since he managed to pull this off the first time and went and drank all the money. Giving him the knockback again today I go out to the car and find it has been keyed right down the pavement side and is the only car to have got that treatment in the road. No one saw him doing it (that I know of) and it could, conceivable, happened this morning but this pushes things just far enough that it is time to look for a new window cleaner, preferably one that knows how to clean windows properly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 25 July, 2011, 07:14:16 PM
I coulda bought a copy of Asylum (from Oxfams) I could have been a contender. Instead all I have is an empty shelf and the thought of what might have been if I wasn't such a stingy git.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 25 July, 2011, 07:21:23 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 25 July, 2011, 07:14:16 PM
I coulda bought a copy of Asylum (from Oxfams) I could have been a contender. Instead all I have is an empty shelf and the thought of what might have been if I wasn't such a stingy git.
Look on the bright side. You could've bought a copy of Asylum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 25 July, 2011, 07:24:51 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 25 July, 2011, 07:21:23 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 25 July, 2011, 07:14:16 PM
I coulda bought a copy of Asylum (from Oxfams) I could have been a contender. Instead all I have is an empty shelf and the thought of what might have been if I wasn't such a stingy git.
Look on the bright side. You could've bought a copy of Asylum.

I've never actually read it. Oxfam did have a copy of Red Seas -perhaps I should have got that as I always like B&W art. But now they're gone ! Gone! Like tears in rain-oops wrong universe. :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 July, 2011, 08:05:14 PM
All these moments will be lost, in time... like GNs in Oxfam.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 25 July, 2011, 08:21:29 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 24 July, 2011, 03:54:55 PM
Aaaaaaaaaand that is the last straw with the window cleaner.

Speaking as somebody who has worked in this field...

Entirely justified. There's two types of window cleaners. Bluntly thse fall into the category of 'legit' and 'chancers'.

The chancers are usually easy to spot. If your guy has no transport, does a bad job, has a slow work rate and is cheap, then something ain't right. During my time in that line of work, I spotted a number of these sorts dawdling about trying to earn easy beer money.

Honestly - and don't take this as a dig at your good sef, Emp, because you gave the guy a chance - I'm amazed that people take these types on in the first place.

The sad truth is, if you want quality work from your window cleaner, you DO have to shop around for someone who's trustworthy and be prepared to pay more than you might expect. Also, DON'T look for somebody on the basis that they will be regular as clockwork. Because NOBODY in that line of business can be. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 25 July, 2011, 08:33:16 PM
Also, my life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments because of this expensive keyboard that doesn't register all of my keystrokes. Apologies for the typos, folks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 26 July, 2011, 04:57:34 PM
one of my neighbours is over doing the happy grass! every day when i walk past i'm getting the stink of it ,not too long ago he was arrested for a property of his he "alledgedly" let out was being used to grow the stuff , but the weathers lovely and i feel i cant open minis window ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 26 July, 2011, 08:39:14 PM
That does indeed suck, Mogzilla.

I have new neighbours, who can't go a single day without standing outside (underneath my bedroom window) and smoking what seems like a whole pack of regular cigarettes. Being a devout non-smoker, it puts me off opening my window, as the stench makes me feel physically ill.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 27 July, 2011, 01:32:55 PM
Quote from: HdE on 26 July, 2011, 08:39:14 PM
I have new neighbours, who can't go a single day without standing outside (underneath my bedroom window) and smoking what seems like a whole pack of regular cigarettes. Being a devout non-smoker, it puts me off opening my window, as the stench makes me feel physically ill.

Simple - just start emptying your chamber pot out of the bedroom window!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 27 July, 2011, 05:54:33 PM
An elegant solution - I like it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 July, 2011, 05:57:01 PM
"Gardyloo!"  :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 29 July, 2011, 09:29:17 PM
Had the docs appt. Cholesterol far too high.

Weight very healthy, well within the "ideal" bmi, fitness v good and no smoking, low drinking and diet generally fine.

So basically several risk factors low but because my Dad died of heart probs and mum has heart disease i'm still a high risk so statins it is.

Better to sort it now and 40 than to have heart attack at 50 i reckon (might anyway but have to try).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 31 July, 2011, 11:34:29 PM
I had the whole day off so I thought I'd do some gardening. I started with sawing off the fuchsia stems the harsh winter killed off. A couple of plants into it the saw bounced across the back of my hand and almost cut it open: a nice big, deep, curved scratch. I was able to finish the job. There was very little blood, it clotted very quickly and I still haven't felt any pain from it. I've had a dressing pad on it all day and I daren't get my hand wet before tomorrow.

I know I should have worn gloves, but it was only a 10 minute job. There is a lesson there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 01 August, 2011, 02:07:13 AM
Cholesterol is a funny thing, high fibre diet is the best for it apperantly, so long as you are connected to  a public sewer and not a septic tank!
My brother in law and Dad in law both have stints in. My bro in Law was only 40 when he got his, very fit, UEFA coach, mad into soccor, reasonably healthy lifestyle, but he smoked. Doc says the  smoking is no help, but its in his genes.
The flipside, my Dad is 73, he eats about a pound of butter(no joke) a week, fatty hairy boiled bacon, 3 spoons of sugar in his tea, and works the farm like a 20 year old, he gave up drink and cigs 40 years, his cholesterol is 3.7( the irish classification is the same as the UKs afaik).

What sort of saw were you using Ush, if it was a bushman and sharp, the blade shouldnt have slipped, unless there was some small ivy or briars in the way.  A bushman blade can be bought cheaply, and makes life a lot easier.

David

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 01 August, 2011, 07:52:54 AM
Quote from: maryanddavid on 01 August, 2011, 02:07:13 AM
Cholesterol is a funny thing, high fibre diet is the best for it apperantly, so long as you are connected to  a public sewer and not a septic tank!
My brother in law and Dad in law both have stints in. My bro in Law was only 40 when he got his, very fit, UEFA coach, mad into soccor, reasonably healthy lifestyle, but he smoked. Doc says the  smoking is no help, but its in his genes.
The flipside, my Dad is 73, he eats about a pound of butter(no joke) a week, fatty hairy boiled bacon, 3 spoons of sugar in his tea, and works the farm like a 20 year old, he gave up drink and cigs 40 years, his cholesterol is 3.7( the irish classification is the same as the UKs afaik).

What sort of saw were you using Ush, if it was a bushman and sharp, the blade shouldnt have slipped, unless there was some small ivy or briars in the way.  A bushman blade can be bought cheaply, and makes life a lot easier.

David

Yep. Doc tells me diet would have only a little influence on mine.  I'm pretty careful anyway. I don't smoke or drink much and i'm reasonably fit.  I just have a tendency to it  My Dads death was directly caused by blockage at 65 so i definitely want to be careful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 August, 2011, 06:22:06 PM
Congratulations to House of Usher for being in the tiny minority of people who spell FUCHSIA correctly. (go on - ask someone - bet they get it wrong!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 01 August, 2011, 06:35:12 PM
My grandmother was growing them all around her rose garden before I was born, and then I read Titus Groan, so I'm quite familiar with the beasts.

:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 05 August, 2011, 04:50:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 06 February, 2011, 09:14:48 PM
My own in-laws drive me to distraction (not least because of the deeply hurtful favouritism they endlessly display to their darling son as opposed to my wife), but I have a dear friend whose in-law troubles make mine seem entirely non-existant. 

To hear what my friend's husband's family come out with, you would swear their son had married a feral baby-eating smack-head from a mutated tribe of war-criminals, not the highly intelligent, witty, hard-working woman who manages to also be a published author and loving mother of their two grandchildren.  I'd take her reports with the usual pinch of salt one applies to one-sided domestic accounts, except that she can present the proof of this insanity - her in-laws enjoy sending her long intervention-style e-mails bullet-pointed with invented grievances and ultimata for their redress.   It's painful to watch the effect it has on her husband and herself, and the kids that don't know why their 'other' grandparents never send them birthday cards or come to visit.  Families, I ask you.

Perhaps she should do what that brideto be did with that moaning letter from her soon to be mother-in-law...

PUBLISH IT ON FACEBOOK... and watch them squerm.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 08 August, 2011, 11:50:45 AM
I submitted some work on Friday, but then the client ignored all my emails, neglecting to give me feedback or approve the work before leaving the office early. Obviously I couldn't send the work until it got approved, so I waited around like a mug until 7pm just in case anyone on their end got in touch.

...So now it's Monday morning and of course they NEED EVERYTHING NOW! This particular guy is also making very unreasonable (and technically impossible) demands and getting tangibly shirtier with every email. To make matters worse the client handler who could sort the situation out is away on holiday! I'm also stuck working at home, because I can't be away from the computer in case he asks for something else, and it takes me a good hour to get from here to the office.

If it's so important mate, maybe you should have done your work on Friday, rather than fucking off to the pub at 4pm!

I hate being made to feel as if this is somehow all my fault when the problem is their disorganisation! I've worked my arse off for them and been totally professional.

Clients, eh? Don't you just hate 'em?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 08 August, 2011, 12:42:42 PM
got the new Oz Empire today and there was no Dredd in it :'(

CU Radbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 August, 2011, 03:14:12 PM
At 03:41 today I nearly killed an idiot on the road!

I was driving along the A406 (the North Circular in London) at 50 mph, towards the Tottenham turn off. The road has a slip road joining it and then another exiting it, protecting these two slips is a massive concrete wall. As I approached the end of the wall, as the slip joins the main road, a person stepped out right in front of me and didn't even look in the direction of the oncoming traffic and he was wearing his hood up, Bugger  :o

I was probably less than 40 feet from him when I sounded my horn, slamming on the brakes (the road was wet from a recent downpour as well) and deciding which direction to turn to try an avoid him. The twat only goes and does a comedy fall in the middle of my lane. I turned the wheel to go left and hoped that I would mount the small kerb before the wall and not bounce back into the figure on the floor.

By some amazing luck he managed to scramble to the right and get out of my way by inches as I thundered past him. I looked in my mirror and saw him run to the central reservation, then run back the way he came and then vanish!

I wasn't bothered about killing him, as it would have been his fault (I'm a cold hearted bastard) but I had to get down the town today and buy Carolyn a present and card for her 40th tomorrow and didn't want to spend all day being interviewed by the police about what could have happened.

I reckon he was one of the sods from all the trouble in London last night, as the direction he came from was one of the areas smashed up!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 August, 2011, 03:16:46 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 08 August, 2011, 03:14:12 PM

I wasn't bothered about killing him, as it would have been his fault (I'm a cold hearted bastard) but I had to get down the town today and buy Carolyn a present and card for her 40th tomorrow and didn't want to spend all day being interviewed by the police about what could have happened.

If that isn't the plot of a Dredd one-off...

Lucky escape for both participants, all the same. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 08 August, 2011, 04:41:26 PM
the fact that he ran back the way he came suggests hes dodgy perhaps you should havesquashed him...

   my minor impediment is now my bad back and shoulder  after years nagging the wife we need a skip to do the attic mini mogs toys etc and every time getting an"i'll ebay it" (she never.) i have filled a skip with 13 years of crap and that only makes up half the space of the attic! we have 6 bin bags of cuddly toys to sell/charity sho[p 7 nappy boxes full of baby/toddler clothes and about the same in bin liners (her nephews just had a kid so we can palm some off on him! a rocking horse and the back wall of the attic is full of xmas decs 4 boxes and several bags! my wife goes a bit ott!!!!


oh, and we had a tramp going through ripping the bags while waiting for the skip to arrive but he did take the naff 5ft inflatable xmas tigger i refused to let them put out!


  gonna be sore in the morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 08 August, 2011, 06:05:46 PM
My mother in law organised a guy to do our bathroom as a christmas present.......said guy seems to have given us the run around he's supposed to start work on our bathroom monday coming up.

Currently there's no sign of life from this hillbilly cowboy and we now have tiles,bath, toilet etc littering various rooms in the house and by the look's of things nobody to do said work.

I'm frustrated that the guy can't just be man enough and say he didn't want to do the work/took on more than he could handle.I don't know but atleast grow a set of ball's and say your not coming.

If it's not one thing its another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 08 August, 2011, 08:38:20 PM
we use a reliable guy i can pm his details if you want but he's in preston.dunno if thats any good.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 08 August, 2011, 10:08:51 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 08 August, 2011, 08:38:20 PM
we use a reliable guy i can pm his details if you want but he's in preston.dunno if thats any good.

I suspect were to far north unfortunately thanks anyway
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 August, 2011, 07:51:28 PM
the shitty city rover failed its mot on its indicator stalk! then the replacement we got was broke so we have to wait again for the replacement to come...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 09 August, 2011, 07:53:55 PM
Evacuated from work before the riots kicked in big in Birmingham. Shitting bricks about the trains tomorrow, as I will not be walking an hour and a half to the pissing Metro station.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: klute on 09 August, 2011, 09:17:47 PM
Quote from: klute on 08 August, 2011, 06:05:46 PM
My mother in law organised a guy to do our bathroom as a christmas present.......said guy seems to have given us the run around he's supposed to start work on our bathroom monday coming up.

Currently there's no sign of life from this hillbilly cowboy and we now have tiles,bath, toilet etc littering various rooms in the house and by the look's of things nobody to do said work.

I'm frustrated that the guy can't just be man enough and say he didn't want to do the work/took on more than he could handle.I don't know but atleast grow a set of ball's and say your not coming.

If it's not one thing its another.

Just an update the guy has been in touch BUT i suspect the only reason is because his company sent him back to check work at my inlaw's house he's supposed to pop over to our house tomorrow according to him so i'll have to wait and see what tomorrow brings.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 10 August, 2011, 10:34:13 PM
...because I am sick to death of staring up Anderson's nose every time I log on to this forum! It's distracting and gross.  :-\

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 August, 2011, 10:35:40 PM
There seem to be fewer and fewer yappers every week. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: flintlockjaw on 11 August, 2011, 12:43:06 AM
I'd yap...but the time difference is too much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 August, 2011, 01:02:31 AM
We're still open.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 12 August, 2011, 01:49:02 PM
Now I've lost my damn wallet, can life not get any worse!?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 August, 2011, 07:05:16 PM
Earlier on I was wandering down the town to put 3 T-Shirt designs in to be embroidered and then collect the Fish & chips (it is Friday) and while I was doing this I was reading some tweets. Now this is the weird bit, I had just read how Mike Donachie had had an altercation on the footpath with someone, when, you guessed it, I had a similar thing.

I was walking along the path minding my own business when two 20 somethings bumped their bikes off the road and onto the path right in front of me and then just stood there blocking my route. I was about 10 foot away and they still hadn't moved. Now the problem is that the road is part of the one way madness that causes hell in the town and so it's always busy, do I walk into the road or do I wait for them to move.

I looked at both of their faces to see if they would realise that they were blocking the path and then move out of the way. The look back was a no, so onwards I went  >:D

I caught the first bike's rear wheel with my left shin and then used the forward movement of my leg to push the bike over with the rider still on. Before the second rider could move I had placed my foot onto the rim of his rear wheel, bending a few spokes and then as my body passed the bike my foot dragged the wheel along with me until my foot came out (only one pace).

Both the tits started to shout abuse but I had a mission to do, so I couldn't be bothered having some more fun. As I passed a bloke stood outside the hairdressers, he said to me something along the lines of 'well done mate' as he had watched the whole thing.

I'm sure they thought I was going to have to walk into the oncoming traffic to get around them because they think they own the place. Think Again!

The spirit of Donachie was with me  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 13 August, 2011, 09:57:45 AM
System and I just had a lovely confrontation between us two and four drunken/stoned prats  in their early twenties-swilling cans of lager at 9.30am in the morning!

I'm happy to say we told them to fuck off! and after some more verbal off they went.




Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 13 August, 2011, 10:29:31 AM
Very strange encounter indeed. I heard the voices first and I must admit I thought nothing of it but when we walked round the corner from the Station I saw them and that swagger of the totally faced. The guy who spoke the most put his arms out carrying the bottle of bright Pink 'Wicked ' drink or some such blurb but I think it was mostly bravado showing off to his friends shouting 'Come on then, lads what yah got?'

I murmered some reply like 'Look what you've got?' pointing at the bottle drink trying to make a bit of a joke but I must admit the Adrenaline rush began to kick in a bit and I realized that we had walked between them a bit of a bad position to be in since we were outnumbered, 2 of us 4 of them.

Zarjazzer however eyed the Guy down telling him forcefully to back away and Fuck Off. We we're now walking away from each other they [I assume] to the Station and that was it but they were steaming, really drunk. Anyway I doubt they'll get to where ever they were planning to go not in their condition. Only 9:30AM a not very happy start to Saturday!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 15 August, 2011, 10:14:25 AM
i did my back in tackling the 13 year dumping ground that is the attic...it was 98% better then yesterday i coughed....back to square drokking one! ouchy!!!!! >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 15 August, 2011, 12:59:31 PM
I once put my back out on account of a lorry-load of Christmas trees and a pillock. Ouchy indeed - hope it clears up soon, Mogz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 17 August, 2011, 04:34:27 PM
my fricken recliner sofa is fucked...was "zooping" it back to get up and do summat when there was a bang and it stopped working...the metal frame is sheared off and twisted so i've got to wait in friday for DFS to come and not accept ant responsibility for it...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 August, 2011, 06:48:50 PM
Went canoeing this afternoon with Sam and had great fun, only one slight problem though!

The Medway near Maidstone has claimed 3 lives this year alone (this is the river we were on) mainly due to people messing about and not wearing the correct kit. Well as I was finishing getting the craft ready and talking to a mate who had come down to have a chat about the whole canoe thing, Sam decided to take a running jump into the bloody river. I dropped everything and sprinted over to were he had entered the water and fished him out, all the while he kept saying "sorry dad!"

My mate then understood why I said he should buy life preservers for all who go on the water with him and Sam was all the proof that he needed to settle the cost matter. He also said he just froze as he watched Sam start his jump and watched me sprint off, I told him that it's all part of living with Sam.

After I had dragged buggerlugs out, I took his life preserver off and his T-Shirt and put my one on him to keep him dry and warmish. We then set off on our journey, me topless and Sam damp, what a pair.

Obviously I told Carolyn, as when we arrived back at our launch site she was sitting there, after finishing work  :wave:

Remember folks, when messing about on the water wear the proper kit, as I won't be there to save you when things go wrong  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 17 August, 2011, 07:59:15 PM
Since having our first child nearly six years ago my wife hasn't been back to work, I've managed to support us so that she can stay at home and look after the kids.

It's been a struggle and we are really feeling the pinch at the moment so it's looking like her indoors might well have to go find a job soon.

I came home today to find her in a shitty mood because the kids have been doing her head in all day and I overheard her say to my eldest "If you don't start behaving, I'll go back to work and you will have to go to a childminder".

The stupid cow now has my five year old thinking that a childminder is something like the child catcher out of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, which is going to cause no end of headaches for us when she inevitably does have to go.

Honestly, for a supposedly intelligent adult my wife is as thick as shit sometimes >:(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 17 August, 2011, 08:53:33 PM
I am with you there Rog69.
Sometimes after a long day's work I come home to a wife in a shitty mood and she has the gaul to say that I should do more work round the house and help her more. All my spare time is dedicated to the kids (which is my choice as should be with any parent) and she says I don't do enough.
While I am at it. The wife has been harping on about me getting tickets sorted to see Rammestein in Feb. I obviously have been pretending to drag my arse about sorting it out. I ordered the tickets, They came addressed to me and she openes them. I explain they were going to be given to her for her birthday and she goes off on one saying I am unimaginitive .
It's weird how this breed can turn something round to make it your fault.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 August, 2011, 08:52:44 AM
Our latest wine-making endeavour went tits-up last night.   We came down this morning to find that our newly-fermenting blackberry-apple-gorse flower wine had literally exploded, coating the entire room from ceiling to floor, wall to wall, with purple-stained flower petals and dried pulp.  Apparently we should have left the mash fermenting in the bucket for a bit longer before transferring it to the fermenter proper, because the pulp blocked the airlock and -KABLOOEY-, our kitchen is like a scene from Killing Time.  An applicé flower petal motif has now eaten through the paint on the walls, the ceiling, the kids paintings, books... it's hard to imagine the force that coated the walls 4m away, and left fist sized clumps of pulp hanging from the ceiling.  That's sugar and yeast for you. 

And that was the scraping of that day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 August, 2011, 12:14:53 PM
Jeez, it's a good job you never drank any...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 August, 2011, 12:25:20 PM
Chance would have been a fine thing - if you knew how long it took to gather those gorse flowers in the first place!  Overconfidence, that's the problem - we'd just debuted our successful 4th batch (based on simple grape concentrate, but aged 6 months) while camping at the weekend, and it had gone down very well with friends (too well, 6 bottles gone!), and so on our return launched straight into our most ambitious blend yet... but we got something badly wrong with the mix!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 August, 2011, 12:49:03 PM
"Tordel's TNT Tipple" - at least now you've got a name for it  ;)

I know I made light of your mishap (not in a bad way, honest) but that's an awful lot of cleaning up you've got to do there. Hope it doesn't take too long and that your next batch is arsom.

Of course, it could have been a lot worse...

(http://www.hna.de/bilder/2010/05/12/759882/1047651555-getraenke-lkw-ladung-abfahrt-kassel-nord-flaschen.9.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 18 August, 2011, 01:54:39 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 18 August, 2011, 08:52:44 AM
Our latest wine-making endeavour went tits-up last night.

Do you use a hydrometer in wine making?
I use one for brewing to check the fermentation has stopped and have never had a bottle bomb yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 August, 2011, 03:30:11 PM
Quote from: Albion on 18 August, 2011, 01:54:39 PM
Do you use a hydrometer in wine making?

We did when we started out (although this was long prior to bottling, just first fermentation), but alas!  After reds, whites, grapefruit, pineapple, earl grey, green tea, blackberry, we thought we knew it all!  CSI report suggests that t'would have been fine but that the flower petals bubbled to top of the fermenter and blocked the airlock, which is why we should have let the mash sit longer to degass a bit...

Anyway, my brother has gifted us two tickets for Planet of the Apes tonight, and my parents have agreed to babysit, so some ape-on-human action will put this sorry tale of scientific hubris out of our minds!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 August, 2011, 03:38:28 PM
@TLS:  No worries, to be honest we've had better laughs out of this than anything for ages.  Well, at least since last week when my 2 year old did her best Peppa Pig 'jumping in muddy puddles' routine... in what we subsequently discovered was a pool of urine left behind by my 'I couldn't hold it so I went in the garden' 5 year old. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 18 August, 2011, 04:33:41 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 17 August, 2011, 08:53:33 PM
I am with you there Rog69.
Sometimes after a long day's work I come home to a wife in a shitty mood and she has the gaul to say that I should do more work round the house and help her more. All my spare time is dedicated to the kids (which is my choice as should be with any parent) and she says I don't do enough.

I get this a lot too, it drives me nuts because although my wife does do a lot with the kids and all of the cooking and laundry, she actually makes more mess and work around the house than she actually does!

I probably work around 50-60 hours a week and still have to spend a lot of my precious time off actually tidying up after her but it's an impossible task, she has no idea when it comes to tidiness and hasn't a clue when it comes to basic aesthetics, she is just blind to mess. On a daily basis I have to clear up crap that she just leaves around everywhere, windowsills and staircases seem to be her favourite storage areas and her idea of tidying something away is to stuff it in a carrier bag and leave it in a corner or on the landing floor.

I swear if anything ever happens to me you will see her on one of those life of grime type programmes, quietly sobbing as the authorities search for my body buried deep beneath bin liners full of old coat hangers and old clothes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 August, 2011, 04:37:03 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 18 August, 2011, 04:33:41 PM...when it comes to tidiness and hasn't a clue when it comes to basic aesthetics, she is just blind to mess. On a daily basis I have to clear up crap that she just leaves around everywhere, windowsills and staircases seem to be her favourite storage areas and her idea of tidying something away is to stuff it in a carrier bag and leave it in a corner or on the landing floor.

It's a good job we never got hitched, Rog, 'cos you're describing me! 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 18 August, 2011, 08:01:58 PM
ahhhh..but does anyone have one that when you do tidy up its "never as good" as she'd do it..."you dont do it right"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 18 August, 2011, 08:20:48 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 18 August, 2011, 08:01:58 PM
ahhhh..but does anyone have one that when you do tidy up its "never as good" as she'd do it..."you dont do it right"
Bingo. "And you never pu it in the right place". AHHHH married blisssssssssssssss.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 August, 2011, 08:22:41 PM
I had one of those. The wheels fell off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 18 August, 2011, 11:09:01 PM
the daftest thing about it is we have a six year old girl in the house! the place will never be tidy again!!! you think she'd a learned by now ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 19 August, 2011, 12:52:45 PM
Freaky morning here. Starts off with someone on facebook bombarding my wife with mentalisms- porno videos he's shot, talk about 'psychic vampires' attacking people, comments that he 'knows her from somewhere', etc. I check out his page, seems he's a 'filmmaker and martial arts instructor' from up north who enjoys 'selling drugs to small children'. Now, that's obviously an 'oh look at me, im so funny' comment, but fuck me that winds me up, the shit. He then makes a number of comments on her wall that could be taken two ways. My natural inclination to let her deal stops dead when he mentions 'putting spiders into the hands of rosy cheeked small blonde boys'; of which we have two. So, i send him a reasonably- reasonably i say- polite message, telling him to stop. And no, by the way, she doesnt want to be in any video project of yours, thanks awfully.

Predictably, all hell breaks loose and he's messaging, sending her emails, messaging me- despite being deleted and blocked. Anyway, i've reported him, and each individual thing he's done, and so has she. He is, in one way, quite amusing in his thickheaded verbal abuse and 'youve got me all wrong' juxtaposition.

Anyway.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 August, 2011, 03:54:51 PM
The manager of our department (one of the campest men I have ever met) has truly awful taste in loud multicoloured shirts. as it's 'casual Friday', I'm wearing my new Dredd subscription Tee (which finally arrived weeks after I'd forgotten all about it). The Tasteless One just walked past and said "oooh, I like your tee-shirt" but turns out he has no interest or knowledge of Judge Dredd, he just likes the shirt.

I'm now worried.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 August, 2011, 03:57:54 PM
Gaze into the fisting of dread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 August, 2011, 09:12:24 PM
This isn't related to anything that has happened to me recently. But it happens to me again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again. Fixing other peoples computers for them. Giving up your free time to help someone and getting nowt but hawk-shite in return. This article explains exactly what I'm talking about (http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-reasons-guy-whos-fixing-your-computer-hates-you/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 August, 2011, 09:16:09 PM
sbt, hope that crap works out ok...theres so many nutters out there,especially worrying if its hinting at your boys...


   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 August, 2011, 10:14:54 PM
Ah Pops, thanks for that link, it left the wife and I sobbing with laughter - we're both the Computer People in our respective workplaces and families, despite being pretty clueless, and that pretty much describes the last 20 years of our lives.

And SBT:  Jeebus fapping crust, and pass out the baseball bats. Hope that fucker gets the message.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 21 August, 2011, 12:36:24 AM
Just spent 5 hours at a wedding reception party where i knew the bride and groom (barely..met em for 1st time bout 2 months ago) and me missus. So a long night listening to tunes i wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

Things you have to do....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 August, 2011, 05:17:42 PM
Easyjet are stingy robbing smugfunts!

I booked cheap(ish) flights to Amsterdam, including an extra £20 for one piece of hold luggage up to 20kg. I wasn't sure how much this was, but had a sneaky suspicion they may peg it at just-below-average to catch as many people as possible, so I bought a cheap luggage scale - good job because I was at least 5kg over. Aha, thinks me - best avoid hefty surcharges at airport by increasing my allowance online - turns out this would cost a whopping £84 for just 6 more kilos, plus 'change fee' of £35 - each way - £238 to stick a measly extra 6kg in the hold. Apparently it would have been cheaper at the time of booking, but who the hell packs and weighs their luggage before they even book the flight?

So I've had a frustrating day paring my camping gear back to the bare minimum (leave the sun cream, lose a jumper and the spare torch etc) and moving anything heavy in to my hand luggage - which has a size limit but no weight limit - go figure. I how have a rucksack that weighs 19.5kg and a small backpack that I can barely lift.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 August, 2011, 05:30:51 PM
Good job you cottoned to that, DDD.  Sounds like the O'Leary Method is spreading...

However, be absolutely certain that there's no weight limit on your carry-on as well (usually 10kg).  We got caught in Budapest a few years back, where they'd let us take our single bag over no problem, but on the way back, even though our carry-on bag contained exactly the same stuff, we were somehow 2kg over.  Cue amusing scene where we put literally all of our clothes on, had the bag reweighed and passed, walked through check in, took our excess layers off and put them back in the bag, in full view of the desk.   

We were planning on flying and camping (with 2 kids) last year, and just couldn't make the weight allowance work, even spread across four.  It worked out cheaper to put the car on the boat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 August, 2011, 05:46:43 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 August, 2011, 05:30:51 PM
Good job you cottoned to that, DDD.  Sounds like the O'Leary Method is spreading...

However, be absolutely certain that there's no weight limit on your carry-on as well (usually 10kg).

QUOTE: "No weight restriction applies within reasonable limits — i.e. a you  must be able to place the piece of luggage safely in the overhead storage bins without assistance." - I WILL get that bastard up there, even if I give myself a hernia!

Easyjet used to be a lot more reasonable than that prick O'leary, about these sort of things, but it seems they've picked up a few tips. £20kg isn't very heavy at all for a rucksack or suitcase.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 22 August, 2011, 07:10:38 PM
QuoteWe got caught in Budapest a few years back, where they'd let us take our single bag over no problem, but on the way back, even though our carry-on bag contained exactly the same stuff, we were somehow 2kg over.  Cue amusing scene where we put literally all of our clothes on, had the bag reweighed and passed, walked through check in, took our excess layers off and put them back in the bag, in full view of the desk.   

A workmate of mine did this with his ski boots at checkout once.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 22 August, 2011, 07:36:52 PM
Only two of us turned up for work today.

Tired... very.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 August, 2011, 10:41:33 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 August, 2011, 05:46:43 PM
20kg isn't very heavy at all for a rucksack or suitcase.

NUMPTY ALERT ... you know when a set of scales is marked in pounds AND kilograms ...?  :-[

Still good news - I can put a whole load of shit back now!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 23 August, 2011, 11:16:30 PM
I stopped a shot at five a side tonight with my jaw. It was so powerful it lifted me off my feet and it really, really hurt.   Forunately, two minutes later, I stopped a shot of equal power with my testicles. The pain from that drowned out the pain from my jaw.  Win-Win I say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 August, 2011, 11:19:16 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 23 August, 2011, 11:16:30 PM
I stopped a shot at five a side tonight with my jaw. It was so powerful it lifted me off my feet and it really, really hurt.   Fortunately, two minutes later, I stopped a shot of equal power with my testicles. The pain from that drowned out the pain from my jaw.  Win-Win, I squeak.

Fixed that for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 24 August, 2011, 11:18:55 AM
I've heard of talking bollocks, but this is ridiculous!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 25 August, 2011, 07:03:44 PM
Got on a reasonably crowded train today - not packed, but every available seat required sitting next to someone else. I found a table with just one girl sitting on it and thought 'this'll do' and sat opposite her. She looked up as I sat down, smiled and leaned forward. 'Could you sit somewhere else, please?' she asked, sweetly.

'Oh. Sorry.' Hating to be a bother to anyone I look around, assuming I've just taken the seat of her friend/boyfriend/child or something. 'Why's that?' I ask pleasantly, as I start to gather my stuff up again.

'Could you sit somewhere else, please?' she repeats, still very nicely, still smiling.

'Why's that?' I repeat. She obviously didn't hear me.

The smile has frozen tightly in place. 'Can you sit somewhere else?' The 'please' has been dropped, I note.

'Why?' I insist, stubbornly. This is getting weird now, and I'm not moving until she gives me a valid reason.

She repeats her demand yet again, and yet again I ask why. She stares long and hard at me with barely hidden dislike, the smile now a slightly manic rictus, and abruptly announces that she's going to sit somewhere else, then. She grabs all her bags and stuff together, stands up, grandly announces 'I object to males. Nothing personal,' and flounces off down the carriage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 07:37:51 PM
Well done for standing up to the pushy looney Dark Jimbo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 August, 2011, 07:55:03 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 07:37:51 PM
Well done for standing up to the pushy looney Dark Jimbo.

Yeah, you go girl!  If you don't want that pushy looney Dark Jimbo sitting opposite you, that's your right, and he was way out of line looking for an explanation.

;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 August, 2011, 08:00:17 PM
She didn't by ant chance have a lazy eye and a piece of her ear missing, did she?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 August, 2011, 08:09:41 PM
I love train nutters. My wife and i were coming back from a show recently, in an empty carriage. We were sitting at a table, and had her huge suitcase on the seat next me, when a middleaged woman dressed as an old lady got on. She had an old lady hat, big coat, pebble glasses, the works, yet clearly was only about 45. She walked down the (as i say, empty) carriage, stopped by us and said to me, "can you move your bag please, i want to sit down."

My wife and i looked at each other, looked at the (empty, did i say?) carriage and i said "cant you sit somewhere else?".

"No." she said, "I want to sit there."

Im afraid, while im generally nice to people, i just told her to fuck right off, and she did. Some people only respond to abuse, unfortunately.

And then there was the pissed 'lad' who tried to introduce himself to us on the way home from london, and who wouldnt go away til 'i shook his hand'. I didnt shake his hand, but he went away, with a bit of forceful coaxing.

As i say, i love train nutters. But yours was exceptional! Well done!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 08:14:06 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 25 August, 2011, 07:55:03 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 07:37:51 PM
Well done for standing up to the pushy looney Dark Jimbo.

Yeah, you go girl!  If you don't want that pushy looney Dark Jimbo sitting opposite you, that's your right, and he was way out of line looking for an explanation.

;)
Ow! me bad. I meant of course that DJ was in the right and looney lady was a keyboard full of wrong. :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 25 August, 2011, 08:17:56 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 25 August, 2011, 07:03:44 PM
She grabs all her bags and stuff together, stands up, grandly announces 'I object to males. Nothing personal,' and flounces off down the carriage.


d'Little tease, everyone knows that 'no' means 'yes'. You should have chased.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 25 August, 2011, 08:46:23 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 08:14:06 PM
Ow! me bad. I meant of course that DJ was in the right and looney lady was a keyboard full of wrong. :-[

Backpedalling won't help you now, Zarjazzer. You've just made my 'list', boyo.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 09:01:44 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 25 August, 2011, 08:46:23 PM
Quote from: Zarjazzer on 25 August, 2011, 08:14:06 PM
Ow! me bad. I meant of course that DJ was in the right and looney lady was a keyboard full of wrong. :-[

Backpedalling won't help you now, Zarjazzer. You've just made my 'list', boyo.  ;)

Pick a number punk! I've faced ninja death squads and Satans hordes with pointed sticks.  Oh wait a minute no I haven't, help!



:)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 25 August, 2011, 09:10:44 PM
On the way back from Bromley yesterday (I often walk) I was entering the local shopping area in Downham (my home town).  I was just considering buying some fried chicken for dinner (well supper at that time but I hadn't eaten yet)  and a young bloke stands in my way and says, "Can I speak to you a moment."

I'm a bit nervous. Some of you might remember I got mugged over the Christmas period by two lads, so I'm naturally a bit wary. I think he saw something in my eyes so he said "Don't worry, I'm not gonna mug you of nuffin'" (or words to that effect). "I just need to get home." He asked me if I could help him out with some money.

Well, I figured, I didn't really need the fried chicken, I could eat something at home, and I didn't like to think the lad getting stranded at night so I gave him my change. (Wasn't much really, around 2-3 quid. All I had on me, but it should help him with a bus fair, I thought.) When he saw I was willing to help he was a bit demanding though, "Yeah help us out with the change," and pretty much demanded it all. (I was a bit bemused but had planned to give him a couple of quid anyway so giving him the rest wasn't that big a deal, from a monetary point of view... it was just the cheek of it.)

As I walk off, he decides to walk along besides me. "Can we speak!" he says loudly, 2 or 3 times, while I try to get away. "Go on then," I says. (I know, I should have told him to get lost, but I seldom allow myself to get aggressive unless I'm really pushed to it.)

"Can you give me more? Give me your number, I'll pay you back tomorrow. Go on, give us a score."

"I don't have anything more," I said, not that I would have given it if I had. I'll give a pound or two if people ask, but not usually more than that. "You can go to a cash point," he says.

When I told him I had nothing as I hadn't been paid yet (the truth, not that I would have done that anyway, I just wanted him to buzz off, without starting a fight), he says "alright then" and quickly leaves. No thanks, just goes, no doubt looking for another sucker.

Okay I didn't spend much, and he wasn't violent but it irritates me that he takes liberties with my generosity.

Things could have been worse though. One of the lecturers at the college where I work was mugged on the way in today. I think he was more shaken up than anything, although he did ask for painkillers from the first aid box. (Which we didn't have.) He still took his lessons though, (what a trooper) and didn't call the police (what a wally). Maybe he did when he got home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 25 August, 2011, 10:14:18 PM
My browser seems to have forgotten all of my saved passwords today for the may forums and sites I waste time on, the only one I can remember is this place.

At least I can log in here and moan about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 August, 2011, 11:50:20 AM
No Prog for the first Saturday in months. Why now Tharg? WHY?!

The absence is made worse by the vague memory of a horrendous, insistent buzzing noise at around five past seven this morning. By the time I'd figured out what it was and made it to the fron door, whoever it was had buggered off. NOOOOO!

On the bright side, at least I have a sporting chance of getting it on Monday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 August, 2011, 12:24:44 PM
Cosh, isnt it a bank holiday monday?
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 August, 2011, 12:34:03 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 27 August, 2011, 12:24:44 PM
Cosh, isnt it a bank holiday monday?
SBT
Not in Bonnie Scotchland.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 August, 2011, 02:44:46 PM
I'm in the dog house.

There was a carrier bag full of rather ropey looking vegetables hanging around on our kitchen worktop for a few days so I took the initiative and bunged them into the recycling bin.

Turns out it was some overpriced organic veg that her indoors bought.

Oops.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 August, 2011, 12:37:21 PM
For the past three days my neighbour has been having sex at five o'fucking clock in the morning. Very loudly, with a woman who squeaks. Squeaks i say.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 29 August, 2011, 12:38:56 PM
She shouldn't squeak unless she needs oiling...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 29 August, 2011, 12:43:33 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 27 August, 2011, 12:24:44 PM
Cosh, isnt it a bank holiday monday?
SBT

aye Cosh, its an English Bank Holiday so work and no Prog til mid-week for us!!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 August, 2011, 12:44:07 PM
URGH!-EEE!-URGH!-EEE!-URGH!-EEE!-URGH!-URGH!-URGH!-EEE!-EEE!-EEEEEE!-URGHHH!
repeat ad nauseum.
Either that, or a female tennis player has moved in and is practicing her serve, with a mouse.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 August, 2011, 12:47:07 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 29 August, 2011, 12:43:33 PM
aye Cosh, its an English Bank Holiday so work and no Prog til mid-week for us!!
I'm off today and the postie came, but he still didn't bring any bloody Progs. What the fuck is wrong with Broken Britain?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 29 August, 2011, 03:29:58 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 29 August, 2011, 12:47:07 PM
What the fuck is wrong with Broken Britain?!

and where are these East Europeans coming from?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 30 August, 2011, 12:10:32 AM
found the prog in whsmiths on a bank holiday ....so wrong thread really ;) :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 30 August, 2011, 01:09:36 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 August, 2011, 12:37:21 PM
For the past three days my neighbour has been having sex at five o'fucking clock in the morning. Very loudly, with a woman who squeaks. Squeaks i say.
SBT
I've had a similar problem with neighbours in the past.

My solution? As SOON as there's a hint of any south-of-bellybutton type activities going on at an unacceptable volume (and if you can hear it, it's sodding well unacceptable!) make a point of doing something EQUALLY LOUD. That generally sends the message that if they can hear you, you can hear them.

My preferred technique has been to get up and make a cup of tea. The racket out kettle makes is enough to make the paper thin walls in our gaff positively rattle.

Loudly saying 'AH! THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED! A NICE CUP OF TEA TO CALM MY NERVES AFTER BEING SUBJECTED TO MY NEIGHBOURS SEX LIFE!' also serves to underscore the point.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 30 August, 2011, 09:43:06 AM
Quote from: HdE on 30 August, 2011, 01:09:36 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 August, 2011, 12:37:21 PM
For the past three days my neighbour has been having sex at five o'fucking clock in the morning. Very loudly, with a woman who squeaks. Squeaks i say.
SBT
I've had a similar problem with neighbours in the past.

My solution? As SOON as there's a hint of any south-of-bellybutton type activities going on at an unacceptable volume (and if you can hear it, it's sodding well unacceptable!) make a point of doing something EQUALLY LOUD. That generally sends the message that if they can hear you, you can hear them.

My preferred technique has been to get up and make a cup of tea. The racket out kettle makes is enough to make the paper thin walls in our gaff positively rattle.

Loudly saying 'AH! THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED! A NICE CUP OF TEA TO CALM MY NERVES AFTER BEING SUBJECTED TO MY NEIGHBOURS SEX LIFE!' also serves to underscore the point.

...that or just start singing at the top of your voice, something like 'Rosemarie' or 'shutupayou face' should do the trick
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 August, 2011, 10:33:54 AM
Quote from: HdE on 30 August, 2011, 01:09:36 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 August, 2011, 12:37:21 PM
For the past three days my neighbour has been having sex at five o'fucking clock in the morning. Very loudly, with a woman who squeaks. Squeaks i say.
SBT
I've had a similar problem with neighbours in the past.

My solution? As SOON as there's a hint of any south-of-bellybutton type activities going on at an unacceptable volume (and if you can hear it, it's sodding well unacceptable!) make a point of doing something EQUALLY LOUD. That generally sends the message that if they can hear you, you can hear them.

As I may well have noted on here before, we had a similar problem with loud and bizarre squeaking in our last place, so much so that we took to calling our downstairs neighbour's girlfriend Squeak - once inadvertently to another flatmate's face.  The first time we heard it, we actually didn't know what was going on - was it an animal in pain, was a gerbil training for the wheelspinning olympics, was it someone being slowly murdered (but clearly not strangled)?  When eventually there was a loud masculine grunt and the squeaking stopped we copped.  I've been exposed to my share of vocal ladies (blows on fingernails, rubs them on lapel in unconvincingly nonchalant fashion), but this was outside all human experience... And I've had broadband for a while now.

At first it resulted in some late-night giggling, but after a week or two of broken sleep (and you really couldn't sleep through it), we took to getting out of bed and stomping around talking loudly in that "did you hear a noise?" fashion.  All this achieved was that the squeak sessions were subsequently accompanied by loud (but not loud enough) music, which had the added annoyance of signaling that the squeaking was about to commence in an unspecified number of minutes.  The album of choice was the Pulp Fiction soundtrack, incidentally.  "Girl SQUEAK you'll be a SQUEAK woman SQUEAK soon GRUNT..."

As I may also have related here, the squeaking was ultimately replaced by something even worse - after a bad break-up, our nights were instead broken by less-than-manly sobbing and repeated, endless playing of ghastly 90's tearfest compilation A Woman's Heart.  "My heart SOB is low SOB My heart SOB is soooo SOB looow....". 




Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 30 August, 2011, 10:51:21 AM
you don't live above Cyberleader do you?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 August, 2011, 10:54:36 AM
You mean the squeaking could have been late night Transforming sessions?  You'd think a serious collector would invest in some WD-40...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 August, 2011, 04:04:42 PM
I got back from holiday today, but my luggage didn't. Hopefully another schlep to the airport tomorrow will be all that's needed....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 30 August, 2011, 07:36:16 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 30 August, 2011, 09:43:06 AM
Quote from: HdE on 30 August, 2011, 01:09:36 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 August, 2011, 12:37:21 PM
For the past three days my neighbour has been having sex at five o'fucking clock in the morning. Very loudly, with a woman who squeaks. Squeaks i say.
SBT
I've had a similar problem with neighbours in the past.

My solution? As SOON as there's a hint of any south-of-bellybutton type activities going on at an unacceptable volume (and if you can hear it, it's sodding well unacceptable!) make a point of doing something EQUALLY LOUD. That generally sends the message that if they can hear you, you can hear them.

My preferred technique has been to get up and make a cup of tea. The racket out kettle makes is enough to make the paper thin walls in our gaff positively rattle.

Loudly saying 'AH! THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED! A NICE CUP OF TEA TO CALM MY NERVES AFTER BEING SUBJECTED TO MY NEIGHBOURS SEX LIFE!' also serves to underscore the point.

...that or just start singing at the top of your voice, something like 'Rosemarie' or 'shutupayou face' should do the trick


shout .....or even better get domino to shout " she's faking it!" that'll stop 'em as they start arguing.. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 30 August, 2011, 07:43:39 PM
Thankfully, it may only have been because of the long weekend, as this morning they were silent. Who has sex at five in the morning three days running? They're both in their fifties too. It would be sweet, if he wasnt such an absolute shithead.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 30 August, 2011, 08:14:49 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 29 August, 2011, 12:47:07 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 29 August, 2011, 12:43:33 PM
aye Cosh, its an English Bank Holiday so work and no Prog til mid-week for us!!
I'm off today and the postie came, but he still didn't bring any bloody Progs. What the fuck is wrong with Broken Britain?!
Okay, this is now stretching the definition of "minor impediment."

As for loud shaggers, I get my own back by waiting until maybe half an hour after they've finished before treating myself to a particularly energetic wank. With the volume on full. Then shouting "That's what it should sound like!" at the top of my voice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 30 August, 2011, 08:24:55 PM
Fucking hell cosh, even i dont have a volume control on my wanking apparatus. Perhaps i should invest in an amplifier!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 August, 2011, 08:47:08 PM
You Victorian prudes :-X

You need to bang that headboard, crack that whip, rattle those chains and scream & shout as loud as you can for at least two minutes to show those fuckers who is THE MAN  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 30 August, 2011, 09:04:48 PM
SBT if they start up again just shout out "the mood is set, the tone is right, now for my morning wank. Thank you (insert neighbours names here)".





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 August, 2011, 09:12:39 PM
Record it, then play it back to them full belt at 3am every morning for a month.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 30 August, 2011, 10:27:47 PM
Have returned to work after a lovely family holiday.  Bummer but at least i'm working.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 31 August, 2011, 12:49:51 PM
Football resulted in two shots blocked by my testicles this week.  First right and then left.  Fortunately, the impact was partially absorbed by my inner thigh on both occassions.

That's two weeks in a row I've taken shots in the noodles. And two weeks in a row we've won.  It's becoming a lucky charm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 31 August, 2011, 12:52:45 PM
Oh and...

Did I really see an entire magazine called KATIE on the newstand at WH SMITHS devoted to the goings on of Katie Price?  Really?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 August, 2011, 01:02:13 PM
We can only hope not. Hopefully it was just a hallucination brought on by testicular trauma...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 31 August, 2011, 02:00:22 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 31 August, 2011, 12:52:45 PM
Oh and...

Did I really see an entire magazine called KATIE on the newstand at WH SMITHS devoted to the goings on of Katie Price?  Really?

Yes. I saw that somewhere too. Is it really all just about her?   :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 07 September, 2011, 05:13:48 PM
Mruh.

Logged into my DA account today, and found that somebody has set up another page using MY pseudonym. Checking the page, it's completely empty so far, so it's hard to jusdge whether there's any monkey business going on, or whether this is  asimple blunder on somebody's part and they've scurried off to set up another page elsewhere.

But still.. who the hell wants to be ME?  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 06:02:03 PM
Tidying up I found some mystery DVDs - all just the discs,* most unmarked but one had a name on it "Black Devils," which sounds like an interesting Euro horror film, with an unfortunately translated name, that I couldn't remember seeing.

So I Googled it and found nothing. However, it does have some German text on it along with the title, so I asked my Dad who taught German but he couldn't figure out one of the words. So back to Google I went refining the search terms until I finally found the cover to the video and realised I'd dodged a bullet there - it is German interracial porn with more giant dicks on the cover than a photo of Cameron's cabinet. My brother was going away on a length overseas business trip and some colleagues had decided he should go well supplied so snuck a handful of mucky films into his bag, he panicked and handed them over to me (I think this is also the trip where I had to clean his works laptop up and found a copy of the Anarchist's Cookbook on there for no good reason but with the potential to make Customs very interested in you). I'd not known what to do with them and thrown them in the back of a cupboard to confuse and upset any releatives cleaning up after my death, and only succeeded in confusing myself.

Now I've got to hunt down all the other unmarked discs, find a way to dispose of them that doesn't result in some variety of accidental discovery and hope that there isn't a rogue disc shuffled in with my other DVDs and CDs that will turn up at just the wrong moment and cause major embrassment (like if it got swapped in with my brother's wedding video by some farcical quirk of fate). Now I know how the nuclear waste disposal industry feels, kinda.

* not much of a surprise as I get sent a lot of screeners, so many I may have to offload some to anyone who is interested here at some point
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 September, 2011, 06:21:38 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 06:02:03 PMMy brother was going away on a length overseas business trip and some colleagues had decided he should go well supplied so snuck a handful of mucky films into his bag, he panicked and handed them over to me...

Must remember that one, it's almost believable...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 07 September, 2011, 07:38:19 PM
That reminds me of a porn mag that a friend of mine acquired that featured some very ropey looking old women. We ended up in a tit for tat war where we would alternately try to secrete the publication in each others houses hoping that it would be found by someone and cause much embarrassment.

Years later I had forgotten about the damn thing until I was taking delivery of a new bed and my wife found it in the divan drawer on my side  :-[.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 September, 2011, 07:46:12 PM
That War should have been called 'Tit for Twat' if you ask me  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 07 September, 2011, 07:56:23 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 06:02:03 PM
so I asked my Dad who taught German but he couldn't figure out one of the words.

or was to  :-[ to say???
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 08:17:26 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 07 September, 2011, 06:21:38 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 06:02:03 PMMy brother was going away on a length overseas business trip and some colleagues had decided he should go well supplied so snuck a handful of mucky films into his bag, he panicked and handed them over to me...

Must remember that one, it's almost believable...

Be warned, this only works with male family members and close friends, it is not effective against wives/girlfriends or the police/customs.

Quote from: Proudhuff on 07 September, 2011, 07:56:23 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 06:02:03 PM
so I asked my Dad who taught German but he couldn't figure out one of the words.

or was to  :-[ to say???

Well perhaps, bt it might be a little obscure, as it wasn't in a German dictionary either. It translated as "filthpigs".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 September, 2011, 10:23:57 PM
I attempted to start a witty thread on which Boarders could post amusing imaginary posts that they'd lost in the server move but it got locked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 September, 2011, 10:40:39 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 07 September, 2011, 10:23:57 PM
I attempted to start a witty thread on which Boarders could post amusing imaginary posts that they'd lost in the server move but it got locked.
That's because I started just such a thread last Saturday night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 07 September, 2011, 10:57:28 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 07 September, 2011, 10:40:39 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 07 September, 2011, 10:23:57 PM
I attempted to start a witty thread on which Boarders could post amusing imaginary posts that they'd lost in the server move but it got locked.
That's because I started just such a thread last Saturday night.

Or because a stupid moderator skimmed the thread and misunderstood its intent. It should now be open again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 09 September, 2011, 04:26:29 PM
Once again, I've failed my Driving Test!!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 09 September, 2011, 04:53:09 PM
Be grateful your not in Germany. If you fail your test 3 times they send you for phsicological testing to see if you have a problem... If you do, the forbid you to attempt to learn to drive. The result? Germans come HERE to take their tests where it's conciderably easier...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 September, 2011, 07:15:37 PM
Unlucky BSC  :'(

Did the tester tell you where you went wrong, so you can do some extra lessons on those areas!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 09 September, 2011, 10:28:21 PM
1) A car nearly reversed into me when I left the DSA car park (I failed to spot the damn car in time).

2) When approaching a medium to large roundabout, I entered said roundabout in 2nd Gear (even though there was just a mini approaching the roundabout from the opposite, I "should have stopped at the roundabout since the mini was halfway round the roundabout").
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 10 September, 2011, 08:35:36 AM
My girlfriend is working today, so I have the flat to myself, some beers, and a copy of Warhammer 40000: Space Marine. Unfortunately, I now also have to work, so there goes that idea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 10 September, 2011, 08:21:04 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 09 September, 2011, 10:28:21 PM
1) A car nearly reversed into me when I left the DSA car park (I failed to spot the damn car in time).

I hit the gatepost when driving out of the test centre (didn't count as I hadn't actually started the test). I completely cocked up other bits and got a verbal warning for driving on the wrong side of the road when there was a vehicle approaching from the other direction (it was miles off, the pussy), but still passed first time. The only explanation my instructor could come up with was that the guy doing the test was "Nervous" Norman and I'd scared him so much he passed me so he wouldn't have the prospect of getting in the same car as me hanging over him. Soooooooooo try driving like a maniac or offer them sex.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 10 September, 2011, 08:35:50 PM
Up before 7am on a Sunday to drive my brother to the airport, the penny only dropped though - tomorrow is the 10th anniversary of 911 and he is flying into the NE of the US (Boston not NY). Granted you are probably about as safe as you can be flying tomorrow (unless you are a swarthy gentlemen) and I don't buy the chain letters doing the rounds (asking you to send them to friends in NY telling them to leave town tomorrow*) but it does bring it all very much into focus.

* Probably originated from the Union of New York Burglars.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 11 September, 2011, 10:58:44 AM
I dropped him off at the airport and the first person to walk passed the car was wearing long Islamic robes and was sporting a big beard. I hope he was picking someone up because he otherwise I'd imagine he is going to have a much more awkward journey.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 11 September, 2011, 05:40:36 PM
While Mrs Tips was away overnight I managed to fix the overflowing gutters (there was a tennis ball blocking the drain) and replace a leaking valve on one of the radiators (drained the system and everything).

But now the central heating pump is making that groaning grinding sound that meansa trip into the tiny loft space to get rid of an airlock. Ho hum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 12 September, 2011, 08:49:43 PM
Sent our truck in to the mechanic's for our version of the MOT. The truck was supposed to be ready Friday. Still waiting. Funt.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 September, 2011, 12:57:45 PM
My shiny new Blu Ray Player arrived yesterday.  But sadly, the HDMI cable didn't.  So I can't play with it and see lovely Hi-Def pictures on my TV yet.*



* That and the fact I don't actually have any Blu Ray discs - but my plan is to mainly use it for upscaling DVDs and watching iPlayer HD and streamed movies from it,
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 15 September, 2011, 12:04:37 AM
Fuh.

I spent bits of the last day and a half arguing with some obnoxious knob online over his aggressive, unfriendly reaction to a fan comic somebody posted on Deviant Art.

Yeah. I should know better. But it's a long-standing bugbear among the online community that this fella is so frequently blunt and rude about stuff he sees and doesn't like. I noticed somebody posting a comment that said 'Why are you being so nasty about somebody's creative efforts?'

He responded by saying that he considered that post offensive to him personally. At that point, the red mist descended and I did the online equivalent of grabbing him by the ankles, holding him upside down and tanning his ass with an iron rod.

(Amazing what the shift key will do!)

Naturally, this led to an ongoing back-and-forth which sees me labelled as some horrible bastard for reminding him that he needs to USE HIS WORDS when he talks to people about their work, and please NOT be an ignorant little twat about it.

Dear lord. The stuff I've heard back. 'I'm only being honest'. 'He won't learn unless I tell him'. 'I see nothing of merit here.' This stuff REALLY annoys me. It's so lazy. I can't believe people are this stupid.  The part that took the biscuit was when he said to me, indignantly 'THIS IS AN ART COMMUNITY.'

Which means what, exactly?

Jeez. This stuff makes me despair for the human race.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 15 September, 2011, 09:57:00 AM
Some cunts just need bandying around the head with a plank called reality HdE.

Last night it was my birthday and I invited some new people back to my grand Palace. I'd flooded the bathroom earlier with my yearly bath running, (thankyou LoD), and that was the only thing I was conscious of until they all left at once, after doing some cocaine and accusing me of " laughing" at them. Some people make up their own minds sometimes. And they are fucking wrong!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 16 September, 2011, 09:21:58 AM
Because my local whsmiths finally allows me the opportunity to buy a copy of the second Tour of Duty trade, after not seeing a copy anywhere except fp on release day. In itself annoying because i dont have a points card for whs, and i do for waterstones. However, i can live with that. I pick it up, take it to the counter and as im about to pay... When my wife phones me to say a massive bill has arrived and im not allowed to spend any money.

Balls.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 16 September, 2011, 02:28:49 PM
If that happened to me I'd pretend that she called just a few minutes too late and had already paid for it. Which probably explains why I'm so bad with money and don't have any.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 16 September, 2011, 08:25:24 PM
completely forgot my dad's birthday on tuesday! :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 18 September, 2011, 11:05:03 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 16 September, 2011, 02:28:49 PM
If that happened to me I'd pretend that she called just a few minutes too late and had already paid for it.

bad bad bad...  in my experience im guessing his wife would have asked to see the receipt and compare the time of the call against the payment. women are like that. they cant walk past a shoe shop without turning into zombies but they turn into Sherlock Holmes if they suspect youre lying to them. And youll never be allowed to forget it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 18 September, 2011, 04:21:13 PM
unless they do it first! my wife always knocke a tenner off the price of anything she bought til she left the receipt on the bathroom shelf and the condensation tatood the price on the tiles!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 September, 2011, 01:09:36 PM
Ooh me back.

Slipped carrying a big bag of heavy wet sand and now I am in a bit of discomfort and pain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 September, 2011, 08:11:04 PM
since all ive had to eat today was a bit of left over trifl, i have scoffed a packet of 14 fish fingers and now feel a bit sick. :sick:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 September, 2011, 08:33:27 PM
I'm moving Carolyn's crime books off one of the bookcases in the dining room and replacing them with a load of 2000 AD stuff. This means it will all be right next to the computer, handy reference location. The thing is I've moved her stuff to the attic, I wonder how long it will be before she notices what I've done and tells me off.
I shall explain to her that she has read all her books and will 'never' read them again, I on the other hand will delve into my stuff all the time. Let's hope she understands that I am correct and I'm allowed to keep my books here, or it's back to the cellar with them  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 September, 2011, 01:34:44 AM
They have a new cut-price version of the Tenori-On which is only like two hundred quid. One of the only things it doesn't have that the real one does is the ability to run off batteries. And they don't have plugs on the bus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 September, 2011, 05:16:26 PM
I am so out of touch, I don't know what this is: Tenori-On
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 September, 2011, 09:09:03 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 20 September, 2011, 05:16:26 PM
I am so out of touch, I don't know what this is: Tenori-On
Just think of it as a sixteen track Kaossilator. With a lot more nifty tricks.  ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzcpTMO0CrI
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Robert Frazer on 27 September, 2011, 01:27:23 AM
Traffic lights that turn green just as you've drawn to a stop; that's a pheneomenon that's been pricking at my patience lately.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 27 September, 2011, 09:41:10 AM
I have managed to contract conjunctivitis with a pulled abdominal muscle all at the same time. Thank you nature. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 28 September, 2011, 02:17:34 PM
i got a puncture some where near walmer bridge yesterday , the wife picked me up but as we were getting the bike out of the car we found an inch long thorn in the other tyre !   so i am fixing two punctures today!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 September, 2011, 02:31:08 PM
My DX:HR Collector's Edition is broken. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 September, 2011, 03:04:07 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin
My DX:HR Collector's Edition is broken. :(

Never mind that, what was that love song (http://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php/topic,34348.msg628855.html#msg628855)?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 September, 2011, 12:00:23 AM
Sometimes manky bastards leave their binbags inside the back door of the close rather than undertake the gruelling ten yard walk to the actual fucking bins. Sometimes, when they do this, septic bin juice starts to leak out all over the floor. Sometime, when that happens, people coming home slip in said septic bin juice and fall flat on their arse.

Sometimes other people probably complain about the extremely loud swearing at this time of night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 29 September, 2011, 07:23:43 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 29 September, 2011, 12:00:23 AM
Sometimes other people probably complain about the extremely loud swearing at this time of night.


Oh yes. The butterfly effect  :-*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2011, 10:09:42 AM
I only had 2hrs sleep last night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 02 October, 2011, 03:21:22 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2011, 10:09:42 AM
I only had 2hrs sleep last night.

Luxury I say, luxury. This Rugby World Cup is really screwing with my body clock. That and bloody 12 hour shifts.

Not only does this T4 nonsense interrupt my enjoyment of classic Simpsons, it makes the young people look like banal idiots.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 09 October, 2011, 03:47:30 AM
whilst preparing precious items for the move to the new home,the shortest member of the household whom is 3 years old, helped with my Robert Harrop Dredd statue. which means there is now ONE LESS of this limited edition statue in the world.

on the positive side, I have/had two, but its not the point is it.  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 October, 2011, 09:15:54 AM
Went to the RSC yesterday with m'lady. We entered the theatre separately as I had gone to park the car and she wanted to get something to eat. Unfortunately she was shown to the wrong seat, so whilst she watched the play from Gallery 1, I was watching it right above her in Gallery 2. Oh well...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 09 October, 2011, 03:09:30 PM
Went to see Seasick Steve at Hammersmith Apollo last night. But the venue was closed due to problems with water mains. I looked online before we set off to check directions but didn't see anything on their website saying it was postponed. Looking at their website now and their Twitter page there is no mention of this. What a bunch of useless idiots.

I wasn't that bothered about the concert – it was the Mrs that was keen and she booked vickets, but pissed off at waste of time and travel money. It's not cheap for four people to travel on bus, 40mins on tube and then to come straight back. Was worse for some though – we chatted briefly to some people who came from Scotland for concert.

Oh well, The Horrors on Wednesday. That I am looking forward to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 10 October, 2011, 08:49:31 PM
I am two weeks overdue for a haircut, the wife's bout of sinusitis is now in it's third week which is keeping me awake at night because it makes her snore like someone cutting corrugated steel with a rusty chainsaw.

I have just had a zit the size of Switzerland pop up on my chin, all this is making me look like an extra from the walking dead and I have to go and have a photo taken for a new security pass in the morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 October, 2011, 09:01:08 PM
Because Steps have got back together again. What a TRAGEDY to the world.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 11 October, 2011, 08:18:10 AM
Steps back in amazement!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 October, 2011, 10:15:21 PM
Tomorrow I am off to the hospital for a small operation, for which I expected to have a local anaesthetic. It turns out I'm having a general so if I'm not back online in the evening I may be dead.
I had to laugh at one line in my letter from the hospital that mentioned the risks include death  :o
It's these general anaesthetics that get people!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 12 October, 2011, 02:06:01 AM
All the best CF. And see you back online in the evening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 12 October, 2011, 11:06:40 PM
Hope it went OK.

Not wrong about Generals.

I thought i'd leave it until now to mention as it went badly for me last time.


Hope you are OK now and came through well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 12 October, 2011, 11:34:45 PM
Cheers, I went up for 08:00 and was second in the theatre at 09:30. The first bloke came back in shit state, seemed a bit affected by the general. I wandered in and had a chat with the team and just clocked the time before they put me under at 09:45.
The next thing I knew, it was 10:30 and I was in recovery and the surgery had gone well. I was pushed back to the ward and waited for the all clear but I couldn't leave until Caz could get me at 14:30. I just spent the time reading and being on the net.
I've not taken any of the painkillers, as I haven't felt any yet and the weird thing is they used glue instead of stitches.
When I left they offered to push me to the hospital entrance in a wheelchair but I could not have my manhood dented like that and I walked but I had to let the missus carry my daysack, rules!

I'm lying in bed now with my surgical bloody stockings on, I'm dead sexy I am!

I've also been told that I can have 28 days sick and more if I need it. I only booked two days holiday as well. They did day that I will need a minimum of a week before I can drive, so I will be on the sick for the first time in my life as I need my holidays for a few future exciting things. Plus Carolyn has told me to take a week off or else  :-\

I will have to ring work tomorrow and see how I go about this and get my sick note to them!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: betel_uk on 12 October, 2011, 11:41:39 PM
Good to hear it all went well... :)

Take the sick leave! When your time comes, I can guarantee you won't be thinking "I wish I'd spent more time at work"!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 October, 2011, 01:44:41 PM
Glad you are OK mate.

I didn't say much as i have nearly died twice under general.

The second time was because they ignored my notes and gave me opiates again.

Last time was especially bad with lungs and heart stopping.  2 hour op ended up being most of the day after having to stop for resus.  Nearly ended up with a puncture in my kneck due to vocal chords collapsing.

I came through though in the end. 

I thought i'd tell you about that afterwards though  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 15 October, 2011, 11:56:20 AM
My DVD recorder has died after less than six months so I have to take it into work today to get it replaced.  It's not all bad though as the replacement will be a better model with a hard drive which is on sale at the moment.  I had planned to buy the more expensive one originally but thanks to a dentists bill it was just too much for my bank balance at the time, now its actually a tenner cheaper than my current one  :)

Still going to now have to spend ten minutes or so un-knitting all the cables so I can take it in  :( 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 October, 2011, 09:01:48 PM
Thurston Moore and Kim Gordon are getting divorced.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Christov on 17 October, 2011, 07:47:05 AM
Food poisoning. Never ending river of sick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 19 October, 2011, 07:00:13 PM
I had forgotten until this afternoon just how horrible painting ceilings was.

To make matters worse, my paint pad has been eaten by mice in the shed so I had to use a brush and I've just been in and taken a look at how it's all drying and it looks as patchy as hell.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 October, 2011, 07:40:08 PM
#Something Fishy, pretty intense stuff there, you could have told me all that before as I love that sort of stuff.

I'm bored stiff with this enforced sick leave bollocks, I don't know what the unemployed do all day and night. Anyway, I went into the doctors on Monday to hand a letter in from the hospital and also book an appointment on Friday to get signed back on to work. The woman on the desk goes 'that's fully booked up, so if you ring up on that morning at 08:00 we'll see if anyone drops out and we can fit you in'.
I replied, 'I need to get signed back on. Unlike all these malingerers and wasters in here I actually want to work and this is the only thing stopping me'. She looked at me in shock and then gave me their phone number.

I just pissed off with the number thinking to myself 'this is another reason why our country is SHIT'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 October, 2011, 08:07:40 PM
My hands are going to stink of kerosene for the next three days and the boiler still isn't working. I've done everything I can short of taking the thing apart and the last time I did that I accidentally changed the fuel:air ratio :-[. Now, I have to get a man in tomorrow to fix it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 October, 2011, 08:29:15 PM
I have to take the stupid cat to the vet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 19 October, 2011, 09:23:14 PM
Went to view THE perfect flat yesterday - lots of interest though apparently so we probably won't be in with a chance of getting it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 October, 2011, 04:22:39 PM
£7.60 for a cinema ticket! Been out of the game for a while - is that about right...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 23 October, 2011, 05:06:07 PM
Quote from: Banners on 22 October, 2011, 04:22:39 PM
£7.60 for a cinema ticket! Been out of the game for a while - is that about right...?
Yep. About a tenner if you opt for 3D. Then there's your popcorn....drinks.....  :(

My minor impediment....the bloody washing machine decides to give up the ghost just after I've just spent my annual bonus on doing the bedroom up. Bastard electrical devices!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 October, 2011, 12:34:51 PM
Was hoping for a pre-Christmas release, but apparently Game of Thrones isn't out on DVD/Blu-Ray until March 2012...

What is that about?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 24 October, 2011, 03:14:55 PM
HBO tends to release DVDs a year after airing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 October, 2011, 03:29:26 PM
That is mental in this day and age, if you ask me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 24 October, 2011, 03:36:13 PM
Quote from: radiator on 24 October, 2011, 12:34:51 PM
Was hoping for a pre-Christmas release, but apparently Game of Thrones isn't out on DVD/Blu-Ray until March 2012...

In the meantime you can satiate your thirst by filming your own episodes with a webcam, a fur coat and a rented butcher's shop.

Write a script involving bearded people wearing crowns and having sex with a horse, and then chopping the horse's head off.  People will be hard-pressed to tell the difference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buddy on 24 October, 2011, 03:56:21 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 19 October, 2011, 08:29:15 PM
I have to take the stupid cat to the vet.

In the past couple of weeks I've had to take the cat (very nasty cut on head), and the dog (hysterectomy, removal of possible cancerous lump with follow up examination and then a week later an unrelated blood in poo and vomiting incident).

Running total is well into the hundreds of pounds... and I don't have pet insurance (idiot!).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 27 October, 2011, 01:01:26 PM
I have all this to look forward too again as the wife and son have got us two new kittens.

I thought my pet days were over when old Titch died early last year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 27 October, 2011, 01:27:43 PM
Despite (or maybe because of) being a vegetarian, I can't stand pets.

And somewhow we've ended up with FOUR cats in the house.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 27 October, 2011, 01:47:38 PM
Pets are great, but these days I tend to think that they're one of those things that are better in theory than in practice.

The downsides - the vet bills, the constant cleaning up of slobber/vomit/poo or worse, the noise, the potential damage to your furniture, the responsibility (having to plan holidays and nights out around them) and in the case of dogs, the fact that your house will forever have that doggy smell - mean that much as I'd love one, I probably won't get a pet in the future.

We have the best of both worlds though - my girlfriend's mum has a lovely big dog called Clive, and we look after him when they go away or have a night out. Always a treat to have him, but it's always nice to give him back too!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 27 October, 2011, 07:32:38 PM
Ever hear the saying "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions"? Found that out today the hard way after I thought I was doing a favour, ended blowing up in my face. And some other people caught in the blast. Great.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 27 October, 2011, 10:13:57 PM
Yeah your probably right radiator.. but we've gone and got them anyway. doh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 October, 2011, 10:28:55 PM
Sentimentality towards pets totally brings out the sociopath in me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: O Lucky Stevie! on 28 October, 2011, 06:00:05 AM
So why is it that people become so agitated whenever you discuss eating their pets & children?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 October, 2011, 07:27:05 PM
My girlfriend bought me a couple of concert tickets for a gig in Manchester tonight. As per fucking usual, my mates have let me down and I'm standing in a queue on my own, refusing to sell the spare to the touts. Arsebiscuits.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 October, 2011, 07:58:09 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 28 October, 2011, 07:27:05 PM
refusing to sell the spare to the touts. Arsebiscuits.

Why? unless there's a hot ticketless girl in the queue, you may as well score some beer money for the gig!
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 October, 2011, 08:24:42 PM
They weren't offering enough to cover the cost of a pint. Told 'em to stick their two quid where the sun don't shine.

In other news, the PA's gone tits up now, so I'll be lucky to see much of Black Spiders this evening. Pissflaps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 October, 2011, 08:28:34 PM
Two quid? I always wondered what those hordes of vultures offered but that's taking the piss.

I just googled/youtubed black spiders in the hope of making some sarcastic comment about you being lucky, but they're actually not half bad!
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 October, 2011, 08:54:56 PM
Well, they managed to get through three songs in what time they had left. Good stuff, but their support slot was knackered by technical issues. The band looked even more pissed off about it than me. I just hope the headline band are worth watching. Can't say I've ever heard of Volbeat...
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 October, 2011, 10:07:29 PM
In a not entirely shocking twist, Volbeat turned out to be a bit shit. I literally cannot remember the last time I walked out of a gig before the end. Still, I snagged a couple of Black Spiders CDs to listen to on the way home, so there's that, I guess...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 October, 2011, 05:52:51 PM
Slept in.

Road to Tae Kwon Do closed with NO diverson sign so had to find our wn way down country lanes past blokes with shotguns

Half hour wait for food at Morrisons.  Then the special offer on Quorn never rang through so 15 minutes waitng for custmer service to give us our extra quid off.

Big lorry spashes stone from puddle into our windscreen and chips it - crack is big enough that whol windscren needs replacing. (£75 excess).

Evidence that Teenage Tips is hotknifing in his bedroom.

Have to go to a Racenight that I can't really be arsed with.

And still got four fucking cats in the house!


Aaah - that feels better now that's all out in the open.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 01 November, 2011, 11:01:16 PM
Called back into work for some bullshit meeting. I've a feeling someone's going to piss down my neck and tell me it's raining. Bollocks.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 01 November, 2011, 11:05:48 PM
Zooey and Ben have divorced. What hope is there for this world?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 02 November, 2011, 10:22:08 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 01 November, 2011, 11:05:48 PM
Zooey and Ben have divorced. What hope is there for this world?
More hope for all the single men of the world
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 04 November, 2011, 12:09:25 PM
Every time I try and sell something on eBay I'm reminded what a time-consuming pain in the arse it is, swear to never use it again, then a few months down the line I've blocked out the previous experiences enough to try again.

Twats who email to tell me they can't afford to pay for the item they have successfully bidded on, meaning I have to relist and start the whole sorry process again (gradually chipping away at my eventual profit in the process), pricks from other countries who bid despite the item being clearly listed as 'UK Postage Only', people who don't pay for items promptly, meaning I have to wait until I can send it. Other pricks harassing you with aggressive 'WHERE IS MY ITEM?!?!' emails 24 hours after winning the bid....

AAARGH!

Have just beefed up my buyer preferences, hopefully that should block the majority of the morons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 04 November, 2011, 02:13:35 PM
Quote from: radiator on 04 November, 2011, 12:09:25 PM
Every time I try and sell something on eBay I'm reminded what a time-consuming pain in the arse it is, swear to never use it again, then a few months down the line I've blocked out the previous experiences enough to try again.

Twats who email to tell me they can't afford to pay for the item they have successfully bidded on, meaning I have to relist and start the whole sorry process again (gradually chipping away at my eventual profit in the process), pricks from other countries who bid despite the item being clearly listed as 'UK Postage Only', people who don't pay for items promptly, meaning I have to wait until I can send it. Other pricks harassing you with aggressive 'WHERE IS MY ITEM?!?!' emails 24 hours after winning the bid....

AAARGH!

Have just beefed up my buyer preferences, hopefully that should block the majority of the morons.

You forgot the two main ones that completely stopped me from selling.
There is the "This item has been used, I thought it was new, i want my money back" email which I received after id posted the 'Original 1970s Action Man' (of course its been frickin used)

And the "This doesn't look like the item i bid on" from someone who bought a Steve Austin 6 Million Dollar Man. But they didn't say why.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 04 November, 2011, 02:54:10 PM
I have been away on fieldwork for the last while. Well, the first 3 weeks of October actually, but the minor impediments were the Biblical flooding, ignorant feckin landowners and aggressive livestock meaning I didn't even reach half my proposed sample number.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 November, 2011, 04:10:22 PM
I popped up to the supermarket earlier to get two loaves of bread, £63 later I was home.

WTF  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 November, 2011, 04:16:33 PM
Was it Dreddbread?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 November, 2011, 04:19:33 PM
If only they did such a loaf. Just imagine at cons with your Dredd sarnie  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 November, 2011, 11:57:15 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 07 November, 2011, 04:19:33 PM
If only they did such a loaf. Just imagine at cons with your Dredd sarnie  ;)
I prefer an old cucumber.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 08 November, 2011, 07:15:06 PM
Severe Weevil infestation in the kitchen thanks to an old bag of flour (little moths everywhere), resulting in us having to chuck out pretty much all food in all the cupboards, and me spending the last 6 hours blitzing every inch of the kitchen and scrubbing with bleach.

Let's see the little fuckers survive that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 08 November, 2011, 08:07:14 PM
You got Weevils, as in Torchwood Weevils??? :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 09 November, 2011, 11:03:39 AM
Might I suggest that, in giving the kitchen a clean-up, you were simply choosing the lesser of two weevils?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 November, 2011, 02:00:17 PM
One of mum's childminded childs tipped a plant pot over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 09 November, 2011, 03:52:08 PM
I've spent so long on the phone to those incompetent fuckwits at British Gas over the last two months that I can no longer stand what was previously my favourite Blur song.

On the upside I got £30 out of them for my trouble.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 09 November, 2011, 04:39:13 PM
Yesterday: finally got confirmation that we have secured our dream flat in London. Mortgage all ready to go, hope to move in asap. Happy days.

Today: Asked if I would consider relocating to a lovely part of America for a (potentially) amazing career opportunity.

As problems go, it's not a bad one to have (and nothing may actually come of it), but still....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 November, 2011, 05:20:07 PM
Stupid cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 November, 2011, 05:32:55 PM
Quote from: radiator on 09 November, 2011, 04:39:13 PM
Yesterday: finally got confirmation that we have secured our dream flat in London. Mortgage all ready to go, hope to move in asap. Happy days.

Today: Asked if I would consider relocating to a lovely part of America for a (potentially) amazing career opportunity.

As problems go, it's not a bad one to have (and nothing may actually come of it), but still....

Oy, that I should have such problems!

As someone who considers "dream flat in London" to be an oxymoron, I'd say Go West, young man!  - you'll always wonder "what if.." otherwise.

Or buy the flat and rent it out for a year or two - it's unlikely to go down in value while you're following the American Dream and learning to spell things wrong.

Anyway, if you can afford to buy property in London now, you could probably go tits-up in the States and still afford to live in a proper part of the country when you come back!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 09 November, 2011, 05:40:24 PM
The flat is part of a part rent/part buy scheme (you have a mortgage for a share of it, and pay rent on top). We could just about afford to just buy a flat of our own, but would have to severely compromise on size and location. Shared ownership increases your buying power a lot and is far cheaper than just renting (we couldn't afford to rent where we are moving to), but the drawback being...

Quotebuy the flat and rent it out for a year or two

...you're not allowed to sub-let because you don't fully own the property.

Hence the dilemna...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 09 November, 2011, 06:48:52 PM
Quote from: radiator on 09 November, 2011, 05:40:24 PM

...you're not allowed to sub-let because you don't fully own the property.


At least not officially  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 10 November, 2011, 12:11:28 AM
minis got a snuffle and cough so shes off school for a couple of days hopefully well enuff for our jaunt to liverpool and dinosaurs! (and kfc and worlds apart) and weve had to add to the spugs thread...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 14 November, 2011, 09:43:47 PM
My daughter texted me and told me that her mum (My EX) may be doing a house swap on the same road as me. At the moment she lives on the other side of Leicester which is fine with me. If she does move this will deffo end up in the spuggs thread.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 November, 2011, 10:36:32 PM
Or YouTube.

That sucks. If my ex moved anywhere near me I'd need a funting harpoon.

And a good lawyer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 November, 2011, 11:21:20 PM
Dinner was served with sprouts. They taste like farts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 14 November, 2011, 11:33:36 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 November, 2011, 10:36:32 PM
Or YouTube.

That sucks. If my ex moved anywhere near me I'd need a funting harpoon.

And a good lawyer.
The worst thing is it seems she seems to have totally forgiven me and is very amicable towards me.
On the other side I still cant stand the sight of her. I do still feel guilty for the way I treated her but she bought it on herself (That is another story which I don't intend to go down on the internet).




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 November, 2011, 11:51:50 PM
The amicability of exes is, in my experience, a trap. The fairer sex are subtle and quick to anger.

I saw my tyrannosaurus ex the other day. She was working as a part-time scaffolder for the firm renovating the local abattoir. I could tell it was her because the rest of the men were on fire, and not in a good way. I saw two of them nearly fall through scratching. She wolf-whistled me, just to make feel small, as exes are wont to do. But I remained aloof, ignored her and the sudden onset of dogs and carried on my way. She thinks that if she's nice to me I'll contribute to her legal fund after she got caught repeatedly glassing a Rumanian sailor in a scrapyard, but I'm nit that stupid, oh no.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 15 November, 2011, 08:09:30 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 14 November, 2011, 11:33:36 PM
(I don't intend to go down on the internet).




V

vzzbux.... How on earth is that achievable?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 November, 2011, 09:25:59 AM
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 15 November, 2011, 08:09:30 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 14 November, 2011, 11:33:36 PM
(I don't intend to go down on the internet).

vzzbux.... How on earth is that achievable?

The first person to work that one out will be rich beyond the nightmares of Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 15 November, 2011, 11:00:56 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 15 November, 2011, 09:25:59 AM
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 15 November, 2011, 08:09:30 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 14 November, 2011, 11:33:36 PM
(I don't intend to go down on the internet).

vzzbux.... How on earth is that achievable?

The first person to work that one out will be rich beyond the nightmares of Sharky.

Actually, ive just realized Mark Zuckerberg has already done it..... :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 15 November, 2011, 12:46:09 PM
the amount of scams for dogs , so far one buisnessman and his dr wife in isle of man who can arrange "delivery" for £250 ...my bro in law fell for that thinking he was buying a parrot...

  and two new ones both from people on trining courses in scotland (dundee and garvin) before they start a new job in the usa (one being a missionary!) who can arrange delivery... ::)


   we have one promising "lead" bum bum! so wwere chasing that up ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 November, 2011, 07:19:35 PM
I saw the advert for "Mario and Sonic at the London Olympic Games" and thought that Klonoa was in it for a second, but then it occurred to me that it was much more likely to be *sigh* Blaze the Cat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 November, 2011, 08:00:48 PM
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 15 November, 2011, 08:09:30 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 14 November, 2011, 11:33:36 PM
(I don't intend to go down on the internet).

vzzbux.... How on earth is that achievable?
It's those fibre optic pubes that tend to put me off.


V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 16 November, 2011, 10:46:53 AM
I'm a bit bored and fed up.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spaceghost on 16 November, 2011, 11:11:19 AM
Quote from: Mikey on 16 November, 2011, 10:46:53 AM
I'm a bit bored and fed up.

M.

Me too.

I'm at work, what's your excuse?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 16 November, 2011, 11:29:31 AM
Yeah, pretty much the same but different. Except I'm living off your tax these days. Thanks for that, UK workers!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 23 November, 2011, 11:19:37 AM
No heating or hot water since Saturday. I'm very cold and starting to smell (more than usual, anway).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 23 November, 2011, 02:11:06 PM
Look on the bright side. Few more days of no washing and you really will be a "Dark Jimbo" ! lol
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 23 November, 2011, 02:20:20 PM
No prog in the comic shop AGAIN! Owner rang Diamond and they said it wasn't sent to them on time. I love British service  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: worldshown on 23 November, 2011, 05:57:05 PM
Time to update your anti-viruses and malware removal kits again, folks.

Bloody "Privacy Protection" infection just wasted the last five hours of my life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 November, 2011, 12:35:48 PM
I've just had my PC overhauled and a new copy of windows installed. Performance has improved, but it seems that some of my problem are hardware related rather than software, as we'd thought. I backed up all my essential stuff but I've lost all my internet bookmarks and i-tunes playlists, and every day I keep finding new settings to adjust or programmes that need to be re-installed.

Also, I'm being plagued by cold-callers, despite being in the Telephone Preference Service. I'm getting about 10 requests a day to complete a "brief customer survey", all from people with strong Indian accents who claim to be called "David Robinson" or "Susan Smith" - why do they do that? it's such an obvious lie, it puts me off doing business with them even if I wanted to. I've tried not answering, politely asking to be removed from calling lists, shouting and swearing, or simply saying "hang on, I'll get him for you" and walking away until they give up and hang up. Getting witheld numbers barred by BT costs £3 a month, so sod that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 November, 2011, 03:14:39 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 24 November, 2011, 12:35:48 PM
Also, I'm being plagued by cold-callers, despite being in the Telephone Preference Service. I'm getting about 10 requests a day to complete a "brief customer survey", all from people with strong Indian accents who claim to be called "David Robinson" or "Susan Smith" - why do they do that? it's such an obvious lie, it puts me off doing business with them even if I wanted to. I've tried not answering, politely asking to be removed from calling lists, shouting and swearing, or simply saying "hang on, I'll get him for you" and walking away until they give up and hang up. Getting witheld numbers barred by BT costs £3 a month, so sod that.

I like to have fun with these people sometimes. Firstly, I never reveal my name and second, I take charge of the call.

Eg: Bring-bring, bring bring.

ME: Hello?
THEM: I'd like to talk to Mr Shark/Is that Mr Shark?
ME: Who's calling please?
THEM: I'm calling from BT/Your Bank/Nigeria. Is Mr Shark there?
ME: I'm sorry, I never give out personal information over the telephone. If you are desperate to contact me, please do so in writing. Goodbye.

This way, you never even get to their sales pitch or security questions. That said, if you're feeling playful, there's nothing to stop you asking security questions too! The moment they ask if they can ask you some security options I say sure, but first I have some questions of my own. I then ask them a list of questions like their full name, job title and direct works contact number and the same details for their line manager and the contact numbers of the customer services/legal and financial departments - whatever springs to mind. Sometimes they answer and sometimes they don't (it's funny to hear them at the other end sometimes trying to find some of this stuff out!). When I've finished asking my questions they then ask their first security question to wich I reply that I never give out personal information over the 'phone and that if they want to contact me about something important to please do it in writing. If they're genuine they'll know your address anyway but, as with your name, never give it out or confirm or deny or correct it.

If they tell you that the call may be recorded for whatever reason, you can say "I do not consent to having this or any telephone calls to my private home number recorded. Please disist or I shall have no option but to discontinue this call." If they give you some waffle about them having no control over the recordings and that it's not a big deal anyway or whatever, simply politely apologise, advise them to contact you in writing if it's urgent or important and then hang up.

If you start getting called repeatedly by the same firm or government agency or whoever (and provided you've gone through step 1 at least twice with said problem caller), have a little speech handy: "This is the nth unwanted 'phone call I have received from your company. Please be advised that if this continues, I will be reporting you personally and your company in general for harrassment under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997 (http://www.yourrights.org.uk/yourrights/privacy/harassment-unwanted-letters-and-telephone-calls/index.shtml).

I also saw a thing on telly about a guy who just strikes up weird conversations with these telemarketers:

Ring Ring: "Hello, hello? Are you the ambulance people?"
"Er, no, I'm Dick and I'm calling from American Express..."
"Oh good, good, you're not the ambulance, then? Do you know when it'll be here, only there seems to be an awful lot of blood coming out of it at the moment..." Sometimes he pretends to be suicidal, that his wife's just left him that very night and he needs someone to talk to.

In short, it's your telephone - take control of it. Nobody, not even an official, can force you to talk on the phone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 24 November, 2011, 05:08:02 PM
Shark, i love that. brilliant. I'm not going to be afraid of the phone again. However can i just point out that when you say you don't give out your name and that they must write to you instead, your acknowledging that they have the right person. But I'm definitely going to use the ambulance routine next time. lol
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 24 November, 2011, 05:31:31 PM
Those are good ideas, however I tend to use the Fawlty Towers Manuel approach. Que? Que?

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 November, 2011, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 24 November, 2011, 05:08:02 PM
However can i just point out that when you say you don't give out your name and that they must write to you instead, your acknowledging that they have the right person.

No, you're not acknowledging anything. You haven't given your name so, even if they do write to you, they have no idea who they talked to on the 'phone. (You offer the option of writing to you in case you need to take this to court in the future - your suggestion that they write is a counter-offer to their offer to have yiu deal with them in the first place. This covers you in case it is something important they need to contact you about. If that makes sense!)

It's all about contract law, boringly. Thr thing to remember is that people like this who ring you up, whether they be from a bank, a soliciter or even the government or police; they're tying to make a contract with you - and legally, nobody can be forced into a contract against their will. Admit nothing and agree to nothing and you'll never get yourself in the doodoo over a phone call again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 November, 2011, 06:25:15 PM
I had a funny exchange with a cold-caller from BT the other day.

BT: In addition to our other services, we have a service that helps stop nuisance callers. Do you have a problem with nuisance calls?

Me: What, like this one?

BT: (awkward laughter) Er, yeah.

Frankly, I don't feel any need to be polite to these people (though I am never outright rude or nasty) - and will simply hang up most of the time. In fact I hardly ever bother to answer my landline if it rings during the day, as 9 times out of 10 it is a cold-caller. Doubt I'd bother having a landline at all if I didn't need broadband.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 24 November, 2011, 07:43:53 PM
BT called me a few times trying to sell me services. I always ask if they actually are BT or are working for BT and it is always the latter. I know that if I had all my services with BT I'd get a better deal but I haven't had calls from them since I said "Look, I never buy anything from anyone who telephones me."

Was shocked earlier this year when I was looking at different company websites for a mobile phone. I briefly entertained the idea of switching broadband to see if I could get a mobile/broadband/phone package. I had a call from 02 saying that they were aware that I had looked at their broadband website and am I interested in their services!!!! I put the phone down and then thought – hang on, so they have worked out my phone number from my IP address or something and telephoned me to flog their shit? Is that allowed?! I should have made something of that really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 November, 2011, 07:46:14 PM
I teabag the phone while they're still on the line.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 November, 2011, 07:47:19 PM
You evil bastards, these are just ordinary people in the private sector trying to earn a living and you treat them like this, I am absolutely disgusted. I suppose you want to see them unemployed, lose their homes and out on the streets starving  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 24 November, 2011, 07:58:18 PM
Actually I was going to say I'm always polite to them as they are just people trying to earn a living etc but I didn't want so come across all softy. 

While we are on this cold calling, sales topic: weren't some of the energy companies fined recently for putting enquiries through the system as a 'yes' and even forging signatures.

I have had conversations with chuggers and I've said: "I agree with the work, would be more than happy to make a one-off donation, but if you think I am going to give my bank details to you here on the street, no."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 November, 2011, 08:01:59 PM
"I got some bank details for ya right here, baby."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 November, 2011, 08:05:05 PM
I find a simple and polite "I'm sorry, we are on the telephone preference list" stops the call dead with a simple apology from them and wastes nobodies time.  And it works even if you aren't on the telephone preference list.  Poor blighters are just trying to earn a crust, we shouldn't be giving them hassle.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 24 November, 2011, 08:08:49 PM
All you have to do to be on the list is register HERE (http://www.tpsonline.org.uk/tps/index.html). It only takes about 30 seconds at the most, so why not do it  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 November, 2011, 08:11:51 PM
My wrist scars aren't itchy anymore so what am I supposed to do with all this E45 I have left.


And then when I need it again it'll turn out that I had less than I thought I had and I'll have to get some more and inflation will have made it more expensive and I will probably have a legitimate unwanted surplus of E45.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 24 November, 2011, 11:19:01 PM
My day by Dr X.

GOOD: FTL accepted a story that's been done by me and Malicious off this board.

BAD: I had to do an important tender document for my work - meeting the Big Boss about it at 9.30 tomorrow

GOOD: I got to work at home to do it

GOOD: I was using my own PC and not the work laptop; nice big screen and ergonomic keyboard

BAD: I was up to 1am last night working on it

GOOD: I finished it at 1pm

BAD: When I came back from making lunch, my 14 month old PC had blown up

BAD: There is no guarantee

BAD: I hadn't backed the damn thing up

BAD: I caused the damage accidentally and the cooling leaked everywhere

GOOD: My insurance will cover it

BAD: But it will be January before I get a repair/ replacement

GOOD: It means I have to play Mass Effect 2 on the Xbox.

BAD: I need to re-do the whole document before going to bed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 25 November, 2011, 06:53:30 PM
The airline have canceled the flights for our honeymoon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 November, 2011, 07:20:05 PM
Oh Banners, that just sucks.

Still, honeymoons is all about the luurve, right?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 November, 2011, 08:54:31 PM
Ouch Banners, that's rough.  Hope you get something sorted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 November, 2011, 07:36:30 PM
Cheers, Fella. It's not 'til August next year so we should be able to sort something. It will probably cost a bit more though. Oh well...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 26 November, 2011, 07:39:38 PM
Jesus Christ, it's not till August and they've cancelled. I'd get in touch with Watchdog and get yourself on telly, I can see the headline now, 'Honeymoon couple left stranded in shithole of a country' (that's this place by the way ;))
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 28 November, 2011, 10:39:19 PM
I have spent the last three evenings re-installing Vista and all of her software on my Mothers laptop after it was boned by fake antivirus Malware.

Why is it that whatever security you set up on non-techie peoples PC's, they always find a way to disable/un-install/bypass/subvert it and then top it off by reverting back to an old version of internet explorer from the fully pimped out copy of Firefox you install for them.

I have to take it back to her tomorrow evening and pull my hair out while she tries to remember her passwords for he email account and Skype etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 29 November, 2011, 01:00:03 AM
Rog, I know exactly what you mean. Everyone with the slightest bit of computer know-how knows exactly how frustrating techno-phobes can be. I posted this article before (http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-reasons-guy-whos-fixing-your-computer-hates-you/), but it does sum it all up beautifully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 November, 2011, 08:46:17 AM
I have the week of work and this morning I get a phone call asking me where I am.
I just replied "I booked it months ago through three different people just to make sure so I will see you Monday".
The reply was "OH sorry, OK then".

Fucking idiots.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 29 November, 2011, 09:49:26 AM
Quote from: Rog69
I have spent the last three evenings re-installing Vista and all of her software on my Mothers laptop after it was boned by fake antivirus Malware.

On Sunday, I set my Dad up on the first computer he's ever had. It was quite scary seeing how little he knew - or rather, how much I take for granted. Things like maximising the window, typing into boxes or even clicking on something with the mouse were all alien concepts to him. I tried as best as I could, but after a while he was just nodding and not really getting it. Good on him for trying though...

My own PCs are always supplied with a vanilla Windows installation, so I was surprised that what made things far more confusing was the amount of pre-installed 'bloatware' that came on his machine. All manner of things were popping up and demanding attention. I guess it subsidises the price, but it's a bloody pain - especially the partition manger. The highly technical language was confusing enough for me, goodness knows what the uninitiated make of it(!) Microsoft can spend all they like on marketing Windows 7, but when the initial experience is full of tacky pop-ups it's very off-putting. And is it really necessary to have to reboot THREE times before getting to the desktop on a brand new machine?

After explaining all about Google and how people 'search' for things on the web, my dad phoned me yesterday whilst on his laptop - to ask for the web address for O2. I expect a few more 'support calls' in the days, months, years ahead...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 November, 2011, 10:28:06 AM
Yes, the bloatware is a major pain. I re-installed my mums laptop from it's own restore partition and it probably took a good couple of hours to remove all of the crap like Norton and all of Compaq and HP's registration nagware and get it back to a nice clean install.

Pops, check out this link to, it makes a nice companion piece to you'rs - http://theoatmeal.com/comics/computers (http://theoatmeal.com/comics/computers)  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: davethomson on 29 November, 2011, 10:32:55 AM
Quote from: Banners on 29 November, 2011, 09:49:26 AM
On Sunday, I set my Dad up on the first computer he's ever had. It was quite scary seeing how little he knew - or rather, how much I take for granted. Things like maximising the window, typing into boxes or even clicking on something with the mouse were all alien concepts to him. I tried as best as I could, but after a while he was just nodding and not really getting it. Good on him for trying though...

I think it is something all of our generation has had to go through, Banners :lol:

My mother, sick of being behind the technological curve compared to my father and I, went to one of these beginners computer courses at our local college and passed it with flying colours. The very next day she was on the phone to me, in tears, about how she had broken the family computer (more specifically, my dads PC, his pride and joy in life) so I drove across town to fix it.

When I arrived she was still in tears exclaiming nothing she was doing could get it power up. I pressed the power button on the tower and it turned on normally. :|

Turns out the college course taught her how to use a PC in their library where they turn on all the PCs in the morning before anyone arrives, conveniently allowing them to skip over the most important lesson in computer usage. Turning the damn things on.

My mother had spent the morning clicking the mouse buttons and saying "On" at the tower, working herself into a frenzy worrying about the damage she had wrought upon the PC. So traumatized was she by this experience she has never used a computer since.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 November, 2011, 05:04:18 PM
My dad can be very frustrating to teach PC stuff to as he insists on reading EVERY word on the page before clicking on ANYTHING. A simple installation wizard can take hours!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 29 November, 2011, 06:05:47 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 November, 2011, 05:04:18 PM
My dad can be very frustrating to teach PC stuff to as he insists on reading EVERY word on the page before clicking on ANYTHING. A simple installation wizard can take hours!

You're bloody lucky!  My dad doesn't read anything, just forges ahead regardless.  Three guesses who has to sort it out when he makes a balls up, and the first two don't count.  Thank god he's planning on dropping his subscription to Web User magazine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 29 November, 2011, 07:28:45 PM
My mum is now sufficiently experienced that she is able to provide first level support to my auntie. Which is a blessing as I'd end up killing her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 November, 2011, 07:53:07 PM
Yeah, after many years of complaining about giving my mother a computer being like giving a chimp a machine gun (sorry mum) punctuated by endless baffling phonecalls and dispiriting weekend-long anti-virus sessions, she now troubleshoots her own skype conversations, books obscure holdiay deals online and disapprovingly tracks her entire brood's doings on Facebook.  I'm so proud!

My Dad, on the other hand, still needs me to find the 'print' button...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 29 November, 2011, 07:58:13 PM
My father in law was doing a course at the local tech thingie and had an assignment - and was able to type it up on his laptop ok, but disaster struck! His printer was out of ink and the assignment was due that afternoon! What to do? "Email it to me da and I'll print it off", quoth Mrs Mikey, thinking she'd have to go through a step by step guide to email. But the first thing he said was "Would it get there in time?" Oh, how we chuckled at how his perception of 'mail' was so antiquated!

So, when does it happen to us? For a while there I couldn't work out how to record things from the telly. it starts...

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 November, 2011, 08:30:26 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 29 November, 2011, 07:58:13 PM
So, when does it happen to us? For a while there I couldn't work out how to record things from the telly. it starts...

For me, it already started: smart phones, 'apps' and all ipadish things.  No clue, ladies and gentlemen, no clue at all.  Touch screens, brrrr.

More seriously, I've been doing a series of GIS courses recently, in conjunction with updating my surveying and draughting skills and shifting all my computer use over to opensource freeware.  I was sitting in a darkened room doing unspeakable javascript and PHP things to customise a web-GIS interface and the thought struck me:  "if I miss one sentence of this class, one single sentence, I'm completely and utterly lost".  There were so many things I simply didn't understand, I was literally hanging on by my fingernails, and yet this was something I actually did (in its then form) for my BA dissertation 20 years ago.  It was a scary feeling of there being just too much new since then for me to come to terms with. 

I fear this was the beginning of the feeling of bewilderment that will dog my remaining years...


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 November, 2011, 08:44:26 PM
Most compu speak is white noise to me. I fear I got left behind long ago. I kind of blag it in my job and learn stuff from customers when it comes to sorting out internet connection problems. We don't get put on courses.
For our TIVO induction it was half a day in a room watching slides and videos, Half hour to play one one then its every man for himself.
Installing is a nightmare. For a standard DIGI to V+ upgrade you are talking 15 mins. A V+ to TIVO upgrade you are talking 1 hr plus change. NO EXTRA PAY.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 29 November, 2011, 08:49:34 PM
GIS fuckin rules. From simple mapping onward, there's so many cool, er, I mean useful  things you can do with it. Not that I'm an expert or anything, but I can confess that creating a 3d fly through of a landform map with orthophotography and my crazy assed results layered on made me feel like I was a Mind. Fuck you, Pong!

And you can look at your house. From above!

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 November, 2011, 09:10:04 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 29 November, 2011, 08:49:34 PM
GIS fuckin rules.

While it has used up every weekend for most of the past two months, which has been hard on the family, and the codier stuff has been more than a bit overwhelming, each day of the course did have a "seriously, you can do that?" moment which made it all worthwhile.  The funniest bit was tea-break on the first morning, when I realised we'd done in 2 hours what had taken young me an entire academic year in the days before GUIs and WYSIWIG digitising.

Of course what's made this possible is the development of really slick open source, such as the QGIS frontend for GRASS - the cost of getting and maintaining ArcGIS and other overpriced Esri stuff has made it impossible to stick your toe in the water commercially.  Now I have the opportunity to get back into the game even though I'm out of work - if only my brain hadn't ossified!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 29 November, 2011, 09:14:44 PM
I was feeling all smug that I could follow this conversation until I totally lost track of it several posts ago.

Bastards. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 November, 2011, 09:37:06 PM
I made the formal decison on my last birthday (44) that henceforth I just can't be arsed learning any more new shit. I can do PCs and not-so smart mobiles, that'll do for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 29 November, 2011, 09:49:42 PM
I've only really used Arc and other ESRI loaded GPS (fuckin sub metre accuracy before post processing!:-o) as an end user- but i've never had to pay for or programme it,which makes a difference.

But yeah Dan, there's only so much you need to keep up with-a lot of it's balls at the end of the day.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 November, 2011, 09:59:04 PM
Quote from: King Trout on 29 November, 2011, 09:14:44 PM
I was feeling all smug that I could follow this conversation until I totally lost track of it several posts ago.

Bastards. ;)

^ this ^


An old duffer I know once turned up on my doorstep with his very first (and very second hand) pc under his arm and desperation in his voice. His explanation went something like: "When I switched it on it used to stick. I tried to fix it, bit now it won't start up at all! The novel I'm writing! My accounts! Aaaargh!" and so forth and on.

So, I plugged his pc into my monitor and such and... nothing. Not even a boot screen. "This is a hardware problem," I mused aloud, to which came the worrying answer "I know."

Off came the back of the computer and the problem was revealed - he'd ever so carefully taken each card out one by one (motherboard, processor, graphics card, RAM - everything), sprayed each one with WD40 and then replaced them all. Against all reason, wiping the thing clean actually worked - then came the usual campaign to banish 60 million unnecessary things all competing for processor time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 29 November, 2011, 10:03:06 PM
Grr. After looking forward to a day off tomorrow the boss has only just sent me a text message asking me to come in. I know most people work full time anyway, (and I've done that myself... even put in hours of overtime a couple of weeks back clocking up 13 hours at one point) and I'll obviously get paid for it, it's just finding this a few minutes ago when I'm all set to relax for tomorrow. Again. Grrr. And this is after term as well, when everything has quietened down these last two weeks. He has an assignment for us apparently. I doubt it's that urgent it couldn't wait, but...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 November, 2011, 10:18:52 PM
"I conditionally accept your invitation on proof of claim that this is an urgent and important project. Please understand that I will be billing you an extra £15 per hour for all work done on non-essential projects. If I don't hear back from you within one hour, I will assume that the invitation is revoked."

Wait 1 hour.

Get hammered.

Enjoy your day off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 29 November, 2011, 10:20:37 PM
Apologies, my above post was rather petulant considering a couple of our lads have just lost their jobs, and I'm complaining about being asked to work tomorrow!

All the best guys, I've been there too.  I am certainly thankful of my job now after a long time unemployed. I was just venting a bit as it was a bit out of the blue and I'm feeling tired. When I actually go in tomorrow it wont be a big deal.

EDIT- Thanks Shark, that made me chuckle.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 November, 2011, 10:28:11 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 29 November, 2011, 10:03:06 PM
Grr. After looking forward to a day off tomorrow the boss has only just sent me a text message asking me to come in. I know most people work full time anyway, (and I've done that myself... even put in hours of overtime a couple of weeks back clocking up 13 hours at one point) and I'll obviously get paid for it, it's just finding this a few minutes ago when I'm all set to relax for tomorrow. Again. Grrr. And this is after term as well, when everything has quietened down these last two weeks. He has an assignment for us apparently. I doubt it's that urgent it couldn't wait, but...
My work tried that with me this morning.
Quote from: vzzbux on 29 November, 2011, 08:46:17 AM
I have the week of work and this morning I get a phone call asking me where I am.
I just replied "I booked it months ago through three different people just to make sure so I will see you Monday".
The reply was "OH sorry, OK then".

Fucking idiots.
Be firm with them.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 November, 2011, 11:24:11 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 29 November, 2011, 10:28:11 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 29 November, 2011, 10:03:06 PM
Grr. After looking forward to a day off tomorrow the boss has only just sent me a text message asking me to come in. I know most people work full time anyway, (and I've done that myself... even put in hours of overtime a couple of weeks back clocking up 13 hours at one point) and I'll obviously get paid for it, it's just finding this a few minutes ago when I'm all set to relax for tomorrow. Again. Grrr. And this is after term as well, when everything has quietened down these last two weeks. He has an assignment for us apparently. I doubt it's that urgent it couldn't wait, but...
My work tried that with me this morning.
Quote from: vzzbux on 29 November, 2011, 08:46:17 AM
I have the week of work and this morning I get a phone call asking me where I am.
I just replied "I booked it months ago through three different people just to make sure so I will see you Monday".
The reply was "OH sorry, OK then".

Fucking idiots.
Be firm with them.



V

I booked a day's leave for today. I don't have the option of striking, but I simply couldn't work on the day of a national strike, it would just feel so wrong.

Up the workers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 02 December, 2011, 11:30:34 AM
after 6months of being off with "low mood" i am getting ready to get back into it .work is making me do a phased return which in the past involved doing 2 days a week then 3....for a month.they now want me to work reduced hours every day so i'll be in 2 hours a day for the first week then 3 then 4 then 5 then back to normal ....this is a bugger as i'm on half pay and it costs a fortune on the buses of which i have to get two to work and it takes an hour gettin in! adding my financial worries which will be exacerbated with this ....i will be telling the wife to not get me anything for xmas  :( and the fucking water bill's just come! >:(



but minis getting her early xmas pressy off nana tomorrow so all the puppy poo will take my mind off things ....i'll then have to look in to any benefits i can claim to help with the reduced income period/travel expenses ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 December, 2011, 02:14:53 AM
I was never really keen on Time Bandits. I caught the last twenty minutes tonight and it was total shite. With the possible exception of the cow-headed things that look like Nazgul.

I never much liked Brazil (the film, I loved the country) either yet I love The Fisher King. What's a boy to do?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 03 December, 2011, 02:37:38 AM
I got an official talking too from HR., for bringing the team into line.
Tharg . Listens to those that tell him things, but rarely checks with the accussed.
it is said in this region. when in a room with a venomous snake and one of the locals, the snake may be your friend.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 03 December, 2011, 09:11:28 AM
Don't you just hate it when you fart and follow through. Dodgy tummy and squidgy bum today.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 December, 2011, 11:07:19 AM
I lost my USB stick that had only just turned up again after being missing for over a year.

Our washing machine decided to go tits up yesterday in an effort to scupper my careful Yuletide survival budgeting, I checked it last night and I can't get the filter out because something seems to be jammed in there.

I suspect that my two impediments may well be linked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 03 December, 2011, 11:23:01 AM
Cthulhu attempted to return today but I beat him off with my rolled up prog. Thank goodness I'd already read it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 03 December, 2011, 03:42:59 PM
The guy I am working with today looks as though he is naked under his boiler suit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 03 December, 2011, 06:39:41 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 03 December, 2011, 03:42:59 PM
The guy I am working with today looks as though he is naked under his boiler suit.

Like a kind of crap zentai ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 December, 2011, 11:24:44 PM
I know I'm going to regret saying this, but a hot sausage just spat right in my eye and now I can't stop crying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DoomBot on 03 December, 2011, 11:38:59 PM
I drove for an hour today to get to Ikea to buy a bookcase.

First, I hate Ikea

Second they were out of stock

Aargh !
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 03 December, 2011, 11:47:58 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 03 December, 2011, 11:24:44 PM
I know I'm going to regret saying this, but a hot sausage just spat right in my eye and now I can't stop crying.

I had no idea that you knew Peter North.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 04 December, 2011, 01:12:13 PM
A good friend and collogue of mine moved abroad this weekend. While it's not like I won't ever see him again, I now need to find someone else to phone up every couple of days to talk about pointless, stupid and occasionally perverted bullshit while laughing like drains in an attempt to preserve my sanity.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 04 December, 2011, 09:04:23 PM
i missed last weeks prog with the conclusion to low life! :( if anyone is getting rid of a copy i'll gladly recycle it.. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 December, 2011, 12:08:08 PM
Damnit! I actually tidied up this week. If my rooms had been in their usual state of chaos you'd have had several week's worth to chose from.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 December, 2011, 11:23:15 PM
ah well i'm sure ill track a copy down.

merlin the maniacal puppy had his first jab today and did a nice sloppy poo in the kitchen which i trod in...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 December, 2011, 01:40:13 AM
Stupid solitaire won't let me join cards onto each other unless they're in play. THEY FIT AND THEY WANT TO BE TOGETHER BUT YOU WON'T DO THAT BECAUSE YOU ACT LIKE A MACHINE.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 10 December, 2011, 11:21:15 PM
arrrrrrrrrrrr a month ive been pl;aying dead rising 2 a whole fucking month im like 4 trophys away from geting a platinum ive put off 6 games in foavor of finishing it 100% and now I have to start again because i some how managed to corept my game ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 15 December, 2011, 07:15:12 AM
My LEADER, has decided to have a one on one meeting, with me three hours before i leave for my first festive leave in 22 years!!! a time for joy and smiles, what can be gained by this, he is the negative type,whom cannot be satisfied unless you offer your first born son, whilst paying homage.

spend and hour, knocking me, telling me what i am doing wrong, and so forth, the normal style such meeting take with him :(. New year will represent the need to update the resume.

some facts you just to have to accept i guess.  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 18 December, 2011, 07:24:32 PM
My sister in law informed me today that she is bringing her faulty laptop for me to "have a quick look at" on Boxing day. I asked her if she could pop it over to me sooner so I didn't have to spend my Boxing day shovelling spyware and re-installing all of the security software that will have mysteriously disappeared since last time, but she's far too busy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 18 December, 2011, 08:42:17 PM
Give it a quick look, have a few deep tuts then say you will need to keep it a while to sort it out.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 December, 2011, 02:40:53 PM
Michael Bublé's bloody Christmas CD is on in every shop, pub and restaurant I've been to in the last week - and now the other half has bought a copy. Argh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 December, 2011, 02:45:04 PM
The closest album chart battle in US history was a couple of weeks ago between Buble and Nickelback.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 23 December, 2011, 07:00:39 PM
I had a rubbish end to the year at work before leave too DD.  Was due to be off for 15th wedding anniv on Wednesday then in Thursday for what was a half day shutdown for everyone.

Boss decides to send me a shitload of stuff late Tuesday, knowing a half day thursday was never enough.. so i drop my wednesday and come in to find he has pissed off on leave himself.

yes, i shall also be moving on again next year.  Actually i'm talking about going freelance and working with an old uni friend on his start-up that really needs someone to take on project co-ordination. I've been management too long to enjoy this code monkey business so I think i'll go for it.  Yes it's a risk but without any debts or mortgage i can afford to have the odd month with nothing and then other months that are bigger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 December, 2011, 08:33:01 PM
We set about making most of our pressies again, for all sorts of reasons, this year adding the kids to the mix.  This turns out to be a game changer.  Unlike adults, who dutifully accept that the vaguely crappy thing they are getting is a token into which one has put thought and time (although I have to say the wife's production line is turning out some truly beautiful stuff), kids' pressies need to be functional and (preferably) non-toxic. 

As a result, I am now approaching hour 40 of night-time labour on The Boy's present, a stackable modular base for his Clone Wars figures, and seem to have spent twice as much on materials as I would have spent on retail in a normal year, despite scrounging most of the wood from skips and  building sites.  I'm sure I'll feel great when this is done, but right now I'm completely sick of it.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 24 December, 2011, 11:49:36 AM
What a fantastic thing to do for him Tordel  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 24 December, 2011, 02:32:44 PM
I agree! That's a really thoughtful, fantastic present you're cooking up, there!

And how's this for a little morale booster:

I've been a chronic insomniac since childhood. Even when I was a wee littel sproglet, I could never get to sleep at nights. So, way back at the dawn of the 1980s, my fatehr, who was out of work at the time, spent a coupel of days making me a little cardboard contraption. It was basically an open ended box decked out inside to look like the cockpit of a super whizz-bang spaceship. The thinking was that I'd sit in that in bed and it would help me to relax into sleep.

It never worked, and never actually got used for its intended purpose more than once. Pretty sure my pa felt despondent about the time he'd put into it, as a result. But the point is, 30 years later, I still remember it, and I'm fortunate that I can have a laugh and fondly reminisce about it with the old man.

He's of the opinion that it was totally worth the effort, because it gave both of us a great memory, and something we can talk about happily in later life.

Pretty sure your efforts will be rewarded, Tordelback. One way or another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 24 December, 2011, 05:21:08 PM
The sore throat I've had for a few days seems to be developing into a cold, I can feel my appetite and energy dropping so have quickly Lemsipped myself up. I am cooking Xmas dinner tomorrow and, while I've nearly finished tidying up so most of my work is done tonight (beyond some preparation and the construction of the salmon gateau), I can't really afford to be too below par as I'm going to be busy and there'll be lots to eat. I have had my annual flu jab (and the swine flu one last year) so it isn't going to be anything major, I just need to try and shunt it over into Boxing Day if possible.

Ah well, these things are sent to try annoy us.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 December, 2011, 03:58:44 PM
My legs are still tired from yesterday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 25 December, 2011, 06:26:58 PM
I spent an hour and a half building a radio controlled Meccano car only to find that when I put the batteries in it doesn't work.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 December, 2011, 06:40:32 PM
William Fichtner, Gary Cole and Kevin Sorbo, I've called you in here because you all look the same and it's getting too confusing. Two of you are going to have reconstructive surgery paid for by me and I'm sorry Billy, but if you ever choose to have this procedure you will have to pay for it yourself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 25 December, 2011, 08:40:38 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 25 December, 2011, 06:40:32 PM
William Fichtner, Gary Cole and Kevin Sorbo, I've called you in here because you all look the same and it's getting too confusing.

Apparently Barry Foster (of Van Der Valk fame) used to actually get acting jobs because people thought he was Jon Pertwee, due to their remarkable visual similarity.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 December, 2011, 01:54:01 PM
Cooking Christmas Dinner on Stephen's Day for the in-laws.  Stephen's Day (Boxing Day to you servant-botherers) is for playing with the kids' loot and eating leftovers.  I love having in-laws, and mine are relatively inoffensive, but I do wish they'd come on Christmas Day when I'm in a turkey-roasting humour, and didn't yet have a Rebel Fleet Trooper I was itching to open. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 26 December, 2011, 04:06:12 PM
I got my long-coveted copy of Skyrim, but I can't install it because my girlfriend killed my DVD drive trying to burn a copy of a Michael Bloody Boob-a-lay album!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 December, 2011, 05:17:59 PM
Use your game key with Steam and download it?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 27 December, 2011, 02:20:03 PM
Did consider that, but wasn't sure how to go about it. Admittedly, I didn't spend very long looking...
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 December, 2011, 04:46:22 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 27 December, 2011, 02:20:03 PM
Did consider that, but wasn't sure how to go about it. Admittedly, I didn't spend very long looking...


It's pretty straightforward, here's a link to the Steam support page that guides you through it.

https://support.steampowered.com/kb_article.php?ref=5414-TFBN-1352 (https://support.steampowered.com/kb_article.php?ref=5414-TFBN-1352)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 December, 2011, 12:43:17 PM
Ive been on holiday for eight days, and on six of those days (all bar xmas day and boxing day), my work has seen fit to either phone or text me with questions or requests. Most notably, on xmas eve, when they asked me to go in to make a phone call and then became annoyed when i refused. As a result of this, my holiday has been less than relaxing and my body has collapsed- ive come out in a rash and cant seem to keep awake. Ive half a mind to go see the doctor and get signed off for a week, as at this rate when i go back to work in a few days im going to keel over and die.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 29 December, 2011, 06:56:08 PM
Do they give you a work mobile? Sounds like you should have one which you can switch off and then block them on your home phones. Or raise a grievance when you get back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 December, 2011, 08:29:10 PM
Send the buggers an invoice - £25 for every out of hours phone call you're invited to deal with. When you're at work, you abide by their rules - when you're at home, they abide by your rules.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 30 December, 2011, 04:14:56 AM
i got called to the office on the day my holiday was about to begin, i was leaving at 3pm,was called in at 1pm.for 12 days off,
back to the UK for christmas, the WxxxkXR in charge, informed me i was to have my contract terminated.

It was a spiteful attempt to ruin my holiday. which it did not, but the fact remains, he gained nothing from action, he could have awaited my return to inform me.

I may be posting in LIFE IS DROKKING FANTASTIC soon, I hope to at least.  got a good follow up next week, with a potential post.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 December, 2011, 08:38:36 AM
That's a bummer DD - hope the new post works out.

I'm hacked off 'cos everybody I know seems to be getting unexpected cheques from the taxman. These are refunds from some computer glitch dating back to 2007 and before - my friend at work got £780, my flatmate got £1100 and another friend got three drokkin grand. I want some free money!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 30 December, 2011, 08:45:51 AM
I got a letter from taxman. apparently i didnt pay enough therefore owe them £250
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 December, 2011, 09:43:36 AM
well,  at least that makes me feel better!  ;)

Apparently about 6 million people got rebates averaging £400, while a million got bills averaging £600. HMRC - more of a gamble than the national lottery!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 30 December, 2011, 10:01:06 AM
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 30 December, 2011, 08:45:51 AM
I got a letter from taxman. apparently i didnt pay enough therefore owe them £250

The exact same thing happened to me about 3 months ago and when I chased them up for an explanation it turned out that they owed me about £1200. Fingers crossed they've made the same error with you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 December, 2011, 10:02:15 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 30 December, 2011, 09:43:36 AM
...HMRC - more of a gamble than the national lottery!

And every penny of tax you pay goes into paying off the National Debt created by private banks. Shall I say it again? I'll say it again: The Government doesn't need to borrow private debt, it's entitled (and morally obligated) to create and control the country's money supply.

Banksters Economy vs Mathematically Perfected Economy  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gakViVaiA28) (YouTube, 2m 42s)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 04 January, 2012, 12:18:56 AM
I turned 45 today and it was un-spectacularly uneventful
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 04 January, 2012, 12:21:36 AM
Never mind. Happy birthday anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 04 January, 2012, 03:56:12 PM
I'm a little bit down over the apparent demise of anime in the west right now.

Some of you folks may have spotted that Bandai Entertainment are withdrawing from production of DVDs (and books) in the North American market. The decision-making seems to have been done in Japan, and I hear rumours that Beez Entertainment, the European distributor for Bandai's stuff, may be about to disappear as well.

That's gonna be a huge blow. I'm gutted. I've loved this stuff ever since Clive James started talking about it on TV. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 04 January, 2012, 03:56:53 PM
My return to work after the Christmas Hols has been delayed. Due to having Diarrhea and sickness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: James Stacey on 04 January, 2012, 04:07:03 PM
Quote from: HdE on 04 January, 2012, 03:56:12 PM
I'm a little bit down over the apparent demise of anime in the west right now.

Some of you folks may have spotted that Bandai Entertainment are withdrawing from production of DVDs (and books) in the North American market. The decision-making seems to have been done in Japan, and I hear rumours that Beez Entertainment, the European distributor for Bandai's stuff, may be about to disappear as well.

That's gonna be a huge blow. I'm gutted. I've loved this stuff ever since Clive James started talking about it on TV. :(
Pah I remember when anime came on 7th gen VHS cassettes complete with photocopies of the script, fan translated, to use in lieu of subtitles. People today don't know they are born.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 04 January, 2012, 08:35:25 PM
Oddly enough, some peopel are still getting their anime in a fashion that isn't a million miles removed from that - and they're the ones killing the industry.

Zing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 06 January, 2012, 11:59:35 AM
I fell of a ladder at work yesterday and gave myself some bruised ribs which hurt quite a bit.

Ok truth be told I "fell" about 20cm - I missed the bottom rung and somehow twisted round and banged my side against the conveyor belt.  Any other place in the shop I would have fallen on my well padded arse and everyone (myself included) would have had a good laugh about it.  Instead I had to visit A&E for a quick check up and am now going to be spending my three days off with a lovely L-shaped bruise and a stiff back and side.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 06 January, 2012, 04:26:06 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 24 December, 2011, 05:21:08 PM
The sore throat I've had for a few days seems to be developing into a cold, I can feel my appetite and energy dropping so have quickly Lemsipped myself up. I am cooking Xmas dinner tomorrow and, while I've nearly finished tidying up so most of my work is done tonight (beyond some preparation and the construction of the salmon gateau), I can't really afford to be too below par as I'm going to be busy and there'll be lots to eat. I have had my annual flu jab (and the swine flu one last year) so it isn't going to be anything major, I just need to try and shunt it over into Boxing Day if possible.

Ah well, these things are sent to try annoy us.

Well thanks to the power of Lemsip I delayed the lurgy and pulled off another Christmas dinner triumph but only by a day and have been producing hellish amounts of mucus since (one year I'm going to find a way to weigh it) and that triggered a chest infection I am still trying to shift now (the cans and bottles recycling this week was 1 can of soup and 2 bottles of Benylin, crazy times at Chez Emps). I haven't really been out and about unless I had to as, with my asthma, I've got to be careful (I was once hospitalised and had to get my lungs built back up using steroids which was no fun, partly my own fault as I wasn't exactly taking good care of myself at the time). Which means I've not seen my mates much (enough to find out one of my best mate's 40th is not only looming but his missus has assumed we were organising something when we assumed she was, only 2 weeks to go...) and not even really had the energy to go through my Christmas haul ("hall"?) - its never a good sign if you can't get up the energy to tear cellophane from DVDs. Still, it is on the way out now and I won't have to see the Doctor, which is good as I suspect there will have to be quite a bit of mad running about to be done sorting out a birthday party. Still I was hoping for a more energetic start to the year after the quagmire 2011 turned into, however, coming out the other side of some lurgy usually imparts some forward momentum. I hope so as there is a mounting backlog of things that need doing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 January, 2012, 01:12:19 AM
Mother served Quorn casserole. It turns out that Quorn explodes in the microwave.



What the fuck, vegetarians? Why does your stupid fake meat explode when exposed to heat? You are all stupid jerks. You can clean up the mess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 January, 2012, 07:47:19 PM
I saw a potato in the kitchen and it had a protrusion on it that made it look like a lemon. There was not a similar protrusion at the other end.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 January, 2012, 08:16:18 PM
Possibly a result of mutagenic radiation from the recent microwave explosion?  Keep us informed of any beneficial alterations you yourself develop. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 10 January, 2012, 09:37:59 PM
Back in hospital again with my second girl, hope they get to the bottom of it and it is minor.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 January, 2012, 12:11:56 PM
Fingers crossed that it's nothing serious.


I worked a 12 hour day yesterday and the got called out last night after only an hour in bed and ended up not getting home until 7.00 this morning.

Today is now supposed to be a rest day and despite being pretty damn tired I can't sleep. The wife just found a key in my pocket that I forgot to hand back to the customer that called me out last night  >:( so now I have to drive 50 miles to take it back.

Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 January, 2012, 02:03:14 PM
Best of luck with the little 'un, maryanddavid - may her problem be small and easily rectified.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 11 January, 2012, 03:50:59 PM
Yes, here's hoping she's in and out in no time and all's well. All the best to all of you, David.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 11 January, 2012, 04:41:22 PM
Hope it gets sorted out soon, David. Such medical things can be a bit annoying but they'll nail it down in the end I'm sure.

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 January, 2012, 07:47:19 PM
I saw a potato in the kitchen and it had a protrusion on it that made it look like a lemon. There was not a similar protrusion at the other end.

It is so your mom can tie some string round it, so it doesn't get "lost."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 January, 2012, 06:45:58 PM
Hope all gets sorted, David.  There's nothing worse than worrying about a sick kid. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 14 January, 2012, 05:35:57 PM
My 5 year old daughter just got back from her dance lesson and sat on my knee, after a few minutes I start to feel a cold, clammy dampness on my leg.

It turns out that she went to the loo at dancing and left her leggings on the toilet floor in a puddle of someone else's urine and then put them back on before sitting in the wife's car and then coming home and sitting on me.

Kids are gross.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 15 January, 2012, 08:41:25 PM
Do you know when your toe nails are getting a bit long and you think "I should clip them" but you can't be bothered going to find scissors so you just try and do it with your fingers and you accidentally rip off a gigantic big chunk leaving raw toe exposed and bleeding and hurting everytime your toes so much as touch your socks or shoe?

That.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 January, 2012, 08:49:49 PM
See Roger, now you're Boarder of the Year you've even got your own fan-fic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 15 January, 2012, 08:54:04 PM
Look At It This Way, Its All In Front Of You Just Like A Wheelbarrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 16 January, 2012, 07:51:13 PM
My shoelace has just broken. Bang goes my evening jog. Looks like i'm out of loo roll as well. Bang goes part 1 of Robo-Hunter!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 16 January, 2012, 07:53:06 PM
I opened a door into my own face today.  It was slightly annoying.

The laughter of my colleagues was the main annoyance  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 17 January, 2012, 12:09:08 PM
...just swallowed a chewing gum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 January, 2012, 12:30:30 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 16 January, 2012, 07:53:06 PM
I opened a door into my own face today.  It was slightly annoying.

The laughter of my colleagues was the main annoyance  :lol:

The idea that you even have a door into your face is rather surreal, but on a metaphysical level, I'd never advise opening it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 17 January, 2012, 01:49:31 PM
 :lol: it does read rather funny when you look at it like that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 17 January, 2012, 02:20:31 PM
Trod is some dog muck walking home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 17 January, 2012, 07:07:24 PM
...gotta bogi stuck up me nose
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 17 January, 2012, 08:42:33 PM
Quote from: wonkychop on 17 January, 2012, 12:09:08 PM
...just swallowed a chewing gum.
Careful it might stick to your heart.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 17 January, 2012, 08:46:14 PM
Quote from: wonkychop on 17 January, 2012, 07:07:24 PM
...gotta bogi stuck up me nose

where do you normally keep them?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 January, 2012, 09:03:14 PM
mY TOE REALLY SODDING HURTS NOW. i THINK IT'S INFECTED.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 17 January, 2012, 09:09:59 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 17 January, 2012, 08:46:14 PM
Quote from: wonkychop on 17 January, 2012, 07:07:24 PM
...gotta bogi stuck up me nose

where do you normally keep them?

...in me trouser turn-up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 17 January, 2012, 09:32:53 PM
The scientist and astronomers on BBC2's Stargazing keep saying Betelgeuse is dying. Good job Tharg came to Earth. Shame for his race though.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 17 January, 2012, 09:59:02 PM
And they keep pronouncing it 'bettle-gerz', which is JUST TOTALLY WRONG, MAN, AND IS FREAKING ME OUT!

Or maybe tim burton doesnt know shit.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 19 January, 2012, 08:11:51 AM
...come on lets be be sirius now!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 January, 2012, 06:44:04 PM
I thought it was Wednesday when it is in fact Thursday. On the bright side the weekend is one day closer
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 20 January, 2012, 10:40:48 AM
I got a shaving rash.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2012, 12:29:12 PM
And I did some rash shaving.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 20 January, 2012, 12:33:48 PM
It's Friday today. Huzzah! Just told I have to come in to work tomorrow. Shit.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 20 January, 2012, 01:10:04 PM
My boomerang won't come back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2012, 01:27:58 PM
Quote from: Judge von Boom on 20 January, 2012, 12:33:48 PM
It's Friday today. Huzzah! Just told I have to come in to work tomorrow. Shit.

JvB

(http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/lifehacker/2012/01/no-work.jpg)

We should learn to say 'no' more. Lifehacker (http://lifehacker.com/5875337/how-to-say-no-without-being-an-asshole) and Chris Brogan (http://www.chrisbrogan.com/how-to-say-no/) can help!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 20 January, 2012, 06:43:51 PM
Sometimes my life is just like Office Space.

PC load letter, what the fuck?

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 20 January, 2012, 07:17:58 PM
Moggie gone missing. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 January, 2012, 08:17:55 AM
Well I just love receiving an emergency callout on a Friday night, driving for an hour to the customer's site only to find that they have all fucked off home when I get there.

Just what I needed when I had to be up at 5.30 this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:05:03 PM
omg never again am I makeing a cockney rhyming slang joke to a amerakin.
I just spent 2 hours trying to explain the joke to him and he sill dosnet get it arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
It was in a chat room he came back and said god you relay dont want to know what ive just been doing so I said sherman tank not only did he not gete this he then started going on about sherman tanks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 January, 2012, 11:09:17 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:05:03 PM
I just spent 2 hours trying to explain the joke to him and he sill dosnet get it arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Was this chat room by any chance one of the text-only variety?   :-X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 22 January, 2012, 11:11:00 PM
Seeing as he`s a yank that works on two levels  :lol:

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 22 January, 2012, 11:23:04 PM
Try explaining britney spears to the unenlightened next time your down the pub,

Complete day horse  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:34:09 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 January, 2012, 11:09:17 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:05:03 PM
I just spent 2 hours trying to explain the joke to him and he sill dosnet get it arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Was this chat room by any chance one of the text-only variety?   :-X

yes but you can make outheres watch youtube clips by bordcasting them its Xat we uses
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 January, 2012, 11:37:13 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:34:09 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 January, 2012, 11:09:17 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:05:03 PM
I just spent 2 hours trying to explain the joke to him and he sill dosnet get it arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Was this chat room by any chance one of the text-only variety?   :-X

yes but you can make outheres watch youtube clips by bordcasting them its Xat we uses

-sniffs- I... love you, man. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 23 January, 2012, 05:08:11 AM
The new roof over the terrace upstairs has leeks!!!!water when it rains  not the highly desirable welsh lapel decorations sort of thing.  not paying until its ripped off and redone.
small but annoying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 23 January, 2012, 07:34:04 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 22 January, 2012, 11:05:03 PM
omg never again am I makeing a cockney rhyming slang joke to a amerakin.
I just spent 2 hours trying to explain the joke to him and he sill dosnet get it arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
It was in a chat room he came back and said god you relay dont want to know what ive just been doing so I said sherman tank not only did he not gete this he then started going on about sherman tanks.

Get a webcam, show him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 January, 2012, 07:46:17 AM
Quote from: Devons Daddy on 23 January, 2012, 05:08:11 AM
The new roof over the terrace upstairs has leeks!!!!

Mmmmmm, leeks.  Have you tried adding cheese?  http://britishfood.about.com/od/start3/r/leekstilsoup.htm
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 23 January, 2012, 09:45:10 AM
did someone just mention cheezy puffs?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 23 January, 2012, 11:20:13 AM
Sure i heard wotsits?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 23 January, 2012, 11:44:59 AM
Because I've still got this fucking cold, an entire week after getting it, and what's more, I actually feel worse today than I have since it began.

I've had to sleep sitting up the last two nights because lying down sends me into coughing fits.

AAARGH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 23 January, 2012, 11:51:20 AM
Feel for you mate, Get a flu jab next year, Had no side effects on me yet,
Was hoping it would turn on my x_genes, But no such luck, Still cant fly?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 January, 2012, 12:39:06 PM
The man has a cold-slash-cough.  All a flu jab is going to do for him is add a sore arm to his problems. 

Not that I'm knocking the flu-jab, I get it myself.  Also, colds.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 January, 2012, 12:48:07 PM
I'll never get a 'flu jab (do you know what they put in that crap?). I have a really cool immune system that generally does the trick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 January, 2012, 12:48:18 PM
Flu jabs give you wings.


I'll get my coat.






V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 23 January, 2012, 12:58:05 PM
A couple of times in recent years (once in 2008, and again last year) I've had what I assumed to be the bona fide flu - all the usual cold symptons plus extreme fatigue leading to being practically bedridden for a week, all over muscle pains, light fever (especially at night where I was plagued by psychedelic nightmares to the point where I didn't want to sleep), not to mention nausea, migraines, loss of appetite and a truly epic case of the shits.

But when at the time I told people I had the flu, almost everyone - not least my work colleagues - responded with a roll of the eyes. I think 'flu' has become such an overused and misappropriated term that people just assume you have a heavy cold, being a baby about it and skiving off work. It's extremely irritating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 23 January, 2012, 01:08:58 PM
I get mine for Alpha Group reasons, No point in me being sick,
But lets not get in to that just now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 23 January, 2012, 01:33:30 PM
Influenza Inoculation ! Does that sound better?  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 23 January, 2012, 02:27:08 PM
Woke up with a sinus cold.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 23 January, 2012, 02:48:11 PM
....got those sinus cold blues... I got those sinus cold blues.. I got..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 23 January, 2012, 08:49:01 PM
Quote from: wonkychop on 23 January, 2012, 02:48:11 PM
....got those sinus cold blues... I got those sinus cold blues.. I got..

Personally, I've got those can't-get-enough-of-them Blue Riband blues.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 23 January, 2012, 09:29:34 PM
 :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 January, 2012, 10:27:04 PM
This week is enrolment week at the college where I work as an administrator. While I have enrolled individuals before, it's one of the aspects of the job I'm not all that comfortable with particularly as there will be new aspects, and I might be alone tomorrow! (I didn't have experience with it today as my working week starts Tuesday. One perk - long weekends and another break on Wednesday.)

One of the ladies who is usually off today told me she'd try to come in for 2-3 hours, but that's not certain at all.

Of course I'm probably fussing over nothing and there might not be that many people at all. (We have an entire week of enrolment when students pretty much turn up when they want.)

Don't mind me I can be a bit of a worrier over silly things*. (That's 'worrier' not 'warrior'.) I'd much rather have a job where I'm just given something to do in a corner somewhere away from students/customers.

I know. I'm a big girl's blouse, and often things turn out not to be as bad as I think they'll be. Mind you, sometimes they're worse.

*Like if I do things wrong, what does it matter? Learn and do it right next time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2012, 01:16:10 AM
For reasons too boring to mention, I had to telephone my bank to order a statement (I know, I know - even I have a bank account).

All the usual questions - name, address, numbers etc., etc. The guy on the other end then said he'd have to ask me some security questions. He asked me two questions and then the following conversation ensued:

"I'm sorry, but I can't help you today."
"Eh? Why not? Did I get the answers wrong?"
"No, but you've only answered two security questions."
"You only asked me two."
"I know, but you need to answer four."
"Then ask me two more."
"I only have the two I already asked you."

Thus began a frustrating circular argument which led to me demanding to speak to his supervisor - which followed much the same pattern - and then demanding to speak to the next supervisor up.

Tempers freyed but eventually we agreed to agree that it was the bank's fault for not asking me enough questions when I first signed up for the account. All was ultimately resolved and I got my statement (which I resolutely and successfully achieved without having to pay for it) but Jovus wept. Anybody would think they read my posts in the "Truth?" thread...


Um...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 24 January, 2012, 04:01:04 PM
I blame solar flares!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 24 January, 2012, 04:32:04 PM
The website I frequent when I am supposed to be working appears to have had a sudden infestation of complete bellends that need to post in every single thread.

Ho-hum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 24 January, 2012, 04:52:09 PM
Quote from: The Satanist on 24 January, 2012, 04:32:04 PM
The website I frequent when I am supposed to be working appears to have had a sudden infestation of complete bellends that need to post in every single thread.

Ho-hum.

I think you meant to say Bellend Flares, or perhaps Bell Bottoms as they used to be called in the seventies
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 January, 2012, 06:11:41 PM
STUPID OSCAR COMMITTEE
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ICONIC_TM on 24 January, 2012, 06:19:25 PM
Pod People!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 January, 2012, 10:51:01 PM
I encuntered similar flu reactions so I took to saying to people that I had 'discovered that previously, i have only ever had heavy colds because I now know what flu really is. and you can understand how it kills old people.'  That seems to elicit the desired sympathetic response.

Satanist, I feel your pain.  I used the ignore function when that happened on a forum i frequent when the wife thinks i'm just taking a very long dump.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 January, 2012, 11:09:19 PM
Cool typo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 26 January, 2012, 11:46:38 AM
I have just come back top work after 3 days off due to a heavy cold and it completely totalled last weekend. I had a cough for a month beforehand so I am calling it my backwards cold. I still feel crappy but slightly better and I have every sympathy for anyone who is currently suffering from this variant. It is shit.

And worse. I am a day late picking up my 2000AD because I couldn't get out yesterday for feeling too wobbly. ARHGHGHGHH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 26 January, 2012, 05:50:20 PM
Pretty much everyone i know has had a dose of this bugger. Still got the cough as well, three weeks after the cold finally cleared up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 26 January, 2012, 05:56:06 PM
Yep, though I'm over the worst of it now, I still feel absolutely wretched in the mornings, and still have a nasty cough over ten days after getting ill.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 26 January, 2012, 06:45:05 PM
Ditto.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 January, 2012, 06:55:25 PM
Sharing a bed with one of the Infected, I knew it was only a matter of time before I too became a shambling moaning thing trailing vital fluids hacking my way through the night.

This really is a stinker of a cold - I've made serious inroads into the world's supplies of paracetemol, caffeine, ginger, orange and honey with no obvious result. The missus is still feebly coughing after two weeks, and I'm only a few days into the meat of it... not looking forward to the remainder.   Why are children so infernally loud and energetic?

My only comfort is that she's also apparently given it to her shite of a boss... although now I think of it that's not entirely a comfort... :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 26 January, 2012, 07:29:43 PM
Always an excuse for whiskey! Or something stronger if your lucky enough to have it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 26 January, 2012, 08:12:34 PM
Hot tea. Lemon. Honey. Shot of vodka. Stir, drink, and off to bed with any of you feeling ill. Repeat until well.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 January, 2012, 08:55:43 PM
Quote from: maryanddavid on 26 January, 2012, 07:29:43 PM
Always an excuse for whiskey! Or something stronger if your lucky enough to have it.

Not a drop left in the house. -shakes head sadly at the state of the world-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 January, 2012, 09:59:57 PM
There are at least three bottles in my house.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 January, 2012, 10:04:56 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 26 January, 2012, 09:59:57 PM
There are at least three bottles in my house.

Oh there's plenty of bottles here too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 26 January, 2012, 10:24:55 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 26 January, 2012, 06:55:25 PM
Sharing a bed with one of the Infected, I knew it was only a matter of time before I too became a shambling moaning thing trailing vital fluids hacking my way through the night.

This really is a stinker of a cold - I've made serious inroads into the world's supplies of paracetemol, caffeine, ginger, orange and honey with no obvious result. The missus is still feebly coughing after two weeks, and I'm only a few days into the meat of it... not looking forward to the remainder.   Why are children so infernally loud and energetic?

My only comfort is that she's also apparently given it to her shite of a boss... although now I think of it that's not entirely a comfort... :-\

Just when does phlegm and mucous count as vital fluids Tordle? You've either been bleeding all round the house or dribbling out the "other" vital fluids. :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 January, 2012, 02:23:38 AM
Dredd fans contract sympathetic Chaos virus from unsanitary plastic Prog holsters.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 January, 2012, 02:29:34 AM
Quote from: George Dread on 26 January, 2012, 10:24:55 PM
Just when does phlegm and mucous count as vital fluids Tordle?

Say what you will Krom, I'd be lost without 'em!  Mind you, I seem to have plenty of both at the moment. -hauk- gagg- splutter

Quote from: The Cosh on 27 January, 2012, 02:23:38 AM
Dredd fans contract sympathetic Chaos virus from unsanitary plastic Prog holsters.

Quick dash to the bathroom mirror to check the capillaries in my eyes...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 27 January, 2012, 08:17:59 AM
....because I have a rare day off work today and have woken up with a stiff neck. I said neck.  :D I will now spend the rest of the day walking around looking like I'm searching for something on the floor.

Quote from: The Cosh on 27 January, 2012, 02:23:38 AM
Dredd fans contract sympathetic Chaos virus from unsanitary plastic Prog holsters.

Oh nooooo!  :lol: I've had that cold/cough...thing for a few weeks. Starting to get on me nips, truth be told.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 January, 2012, 04:04:12 PM
Just recovering from my cold but now I have a vitamin tablet stuck in my throat (just like LAST Friday.)!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 27 January, 2012, 07:21:46 PM
I collect vintage horror movie posters. I had them all framed very nicely, and they'd been in the same frames for years.

In my move from the States the glass in several of the frames was broken. The movie company paid for me to get new ones, so I decided to reframe the lot of them (even the ones without broken glass).

Today I picked them up from the framers and had them all leaning against the walls as I decided how to arrange them. Took a quick lunch break - while I had my head in the fridge, I hear a bang and a smash and look up in time to see my two cats run past, tails poofed up.

Sure enough, while playing they ran behind my frames, knocking three over and smashing the glass.

Sigh.

And to think I went through all that trouble to bring the from England with me. Any of you want them?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 January, 2012, 07:41:04 PM
Broken glass, cats or posters?

If posters, yes please- our lounge currently has framed masque of the red death and land of the dead, but could do with more. What are they?

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 27 January, 2012, 07:48:45 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 27 January, 2012, 07:41:04 PM
Broken glass, cats or posters?

That'd be the cats  :D.

The posters that fell victim to the rascally little runts were my German 'Tombs of the Blind Dead', 'Return of the Blind Dead' and 'Ghost Galleon of the Blind Dead'. Posters were okay, though.

Other posters I have (all are original movie one-sheets): 'Zombie' (Zombie Flesh Eaters for you guys), 'Suspiria' (American Video Release Poster), 'The Beyond' (Grindhouse Rerelease), 'Night of the Seagulls' (4th Blind Dead Film), 'Horror of the Zombies' (Ghost Galleons American Video Title) 'Cannibal Holocaust', 'Return of the Living Dead', 'Meet the Feebles' and 'Re-Animator' (half-sheet).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2012, 07:50:55 PM
One of the shop stewards at work has been trying to get me to join the union for the last week (he eventually figured out I wasn't in it). After he couldn't answer any of my questions I told him 'there's your answer to why I won't be joining' and I just gave him a knowing smile  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 January, 2012, 08:34:33 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2012, 07:50:55 PM
One of the shop stewards at work has been trying to get me to join the union for the last week (he eventually figured out I wasn't in it). After he couldn't answer any of my questions I told him 'there's your answer to why I won't be joining' and I just gave him a knowing smile  :)

Good for you, but don't expect any support (or legal counsel) if you ever find yourself top of the redundancy list, have your hours, wages or pension fucked about with, or get unjustly disciplined. Knowing eight ways to kill someone with  a biro is little use against corporate twattery.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2012, 09:07:34 PM
But you see many years ago when something really bad happened, I represented myself in court and used my brain power to prove that I was innocent and the local council over there was guilty and I didn't do it for monetary gain. In the end all I wanted was my costs and the rest I gave to charity. If I had lost I would have lost everything  :'( but I knew I was in the right and they were in the shite!

If people want to join a union, good for them (I have been a shop steward once, long story short. At my old place the shop steward was shite (in it for his own game) I joined the union because everyone wanted me to be the shop steward. I ousted him and from then on led the bosses of our depot on a merry dance as I got everyone off everything. I did that just to prove a point).

As far as I'm concerned if you have a brain in your head and you know you are in the right you have nothing to be scared of. I have been made redundant, didn't bother me as I walked straight into another job which is even better, while still on gardening leave. I don't intend to have my wages cut (due to everyone in this country needing to eat) and definately don't care about the amount of hours that I work, as I try to do basic hours every day. In fact I'm probably on the least amount of wages out of all our drivers due to hardly doing any overtime.

I can do all that and still easily pay my mortgage and spend my wages like money is going out of fashion and still live within my means. How do I do this, you may ask. I've stupidly followed all the rules and luckily for me managed to achieve my childhood ambition already, so don't have a craving to reach a goal that I've already done. Above all, so long as my family are okay then I'm happy.

Seeing as I'm in the private sector I expect to have my pensions robbed, hang on, they have already by Gordon. So when I'm knackered I've told Carolyn to leave me outside Kent County Council with a note saying 'He's all yours now!'

I suppose leaving the forces would be classed as being made redundant as well, so make that twice and I didn't care that time either as I signed on for 9 as that was all I wanted to do!

P.S. I was never taught how to kill with a biro, it was a Papermate  ;)

P.P.S. I won't be able to reply now, as I'm off to work my unsociable hours  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 January, 2012, 09:17:31 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 January, 2012, 09:07:34 PM

P.S. I was never taught how to kill with a biro, it was a Papermate  ;)

Ooooh, officer class!

Fair do's - unions are an excellent idea in principal, but often flawed. I will NEVER cross a picket line, it just goes against my core beliefs; I'll instictively side with the union over the bosses in any dispute, but even I think that Bob Crow & the tube drivers are starting to take the piss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 27 January, 2012, 10:41:42 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 27 January, 2012, 09:17:31 PM
unions are an excellent idea in principal, but often flawed.

Well, thats the problem right there. Always been in the union with all my jobs except the one im presently in. My last job, when the place was shutting down, and we was genuinely being fucked about by the company, the top union guy had a rush of blood to the head and took our plight as his crusade and launched an almost personal vendetta against the man at the top. All this achieved was we came within a whisker of losing a good chunk of our redundancy package. Whether this would really have happened i dont know, but legally they could have done it.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 28 January, 2012, 01:47:58 PM
Whereas my union is fantastic, democratic and acts on members's views. The leader of it talks to ordinary members about pretty much anything instead of being surrounded by a barrier of PR and policy wonks (he happily talked about footie to my mate's little kid when we were on a march recently.) The local reps are very active whilst I've heard of other branches and unions where they can be a bit wet. They've got a good relationship with our management too, sometimes their suggestions save the bosses a bit of money or help make processes more efficient whilst remaining humane.

When my dad died in an accident at work his union helped us take his employers to court to take them to task over the H&S rules that had been breached and we got a settlement that helped me and my brother finish school, go to college/uni and graduate which we would have struggled to do otherwise.

But there you go, I was already brainwashed to be a union girl by my grandad from an early age. The union helped him learn to read and write better when he came to Britain. They especially do a lot for people who have got nothing and no schooling (thanks to learning reps) and now some of them have set up credit unions so that people can save and get low cost loans.

My family has done all right out of unions but I respect people who have the nous and courage to go it alone. They must always have that choice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 January, 2012, 02:10:18 PM
Whilst unions are a great idea and undoubtedly do a lot of good, there is a danger that they can become Controlled Dissent. That is, it's easier for companies/corporations and governments to deal with a single representative than 10,000 members. So long as your union leader isn't being somehow controlled (by bribery, threats etc.) then all can go well.

I will just point out here that Brendan Barber, General Secretary of the T.U.C., has been on the Court of Directors of the Bank of England (http://www.bankofengland.co.uk/about/people/court.htm#photo) since June 2003. I wonder how much of that time he's spent trying to persuade his fellow directors to bail out the workers rather than the banks?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 28 January, 2012, 02:15:11 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 28 January, 2012, 01:47:58 PM
Whereas my union is fantastic, democratic and acts on members's views.

It's very cheering to hear your experiences -- too often all people hear about is political power-plays at the expense of workers' pockets and customers' needs.

Unions should be all about fairness & reason: they're there to keep management from behaving unfairly & unreasonably; it's also vital that the union itself behaves fairly & reasonably.  There are a lot of good unions out there but sadly it only takes a few militants to bring the whole thing into disrepute.

I found the whole British Airways thing incredible.  Here's a company where the majority of their staff have such low morale they're prepared to lose their own money to protest the unfairness of management policies, yet the bosses waste eveybody's time issuing legal challenges instead of talking constructively with unions to fix a ticking time-bomb.  No wonder the economy is in such a mess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 28 January, 2012, 03:25:22 PM
.......because I forgot to email Denise at 2000AD Subs until today. When my prog failed to arrive.  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 January, 2012, 09:36:32 PM
Really suffering from my cold at the moment. A full on dizzy spell last night. Still working through it though, I must be fucking stupid. If I don't get any better I don't think the missus will let me go into work come Tuesday.

On a positive not I got my union membership number throught yesterday. My company had better watch their backs. If they carry on treating us like shit there is enough of us now in the union to make waves.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 January, 2012, 10:25:26 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 28 January, 2012, 09:36:32 PM
Really suffering from my cold at the moment.

If you gents are labouring on with the same cold I have (and it certainly seems like it), may I endorse Sudafed decongestant?  It's the only thing that's even put a dent in it for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 28 January, 2012, 10:55:40 PM
Someone is trying to make it more difficult for me to cook crystal meth by encouraging more widespread consumption of a base ingredient. >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 29 January, 2012, 07:47:01 AM
The boilers packed up so there is no heat in the house until Wednesday probably.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 29 January, 2012, 09:46:34 AM
There's a strange person in the bathroom. Someone my sister brought home with her last night - I'm going to have to use a bucket if she doesn't hurry up and get out of that frigging bog!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 29 January, 2012, 09:04:53 PM
Re that nasty cold/flu that some of the squaxx seem to have come down with: Years and years ago, I came down with something nastily similar and, in an inspired moment of self-medicating brillaince - as you do - I bought myself 3 litres of the finest Irish Whiskey money can buy and retired to me bed for three days straight, sipping gently away at the rate of a litre a day.

The bedsit I was in at the time was overlooking a park, and by the third day, one of the trees had uprooted itself and toddled over the road to rap it's branches against my window and have a conversation with me.

I can't really remember what we talked about - for obvious reasons! - but by God, those nasty flu germs were sent packing. Maybe not a cure for everyone but hey, it worked for me. Anyhow, hope all those of you who are currently under the weather will recover soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 29 January, 2012, 09:34:39 PM
I was that tree.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 January, 2012, 09:45:00 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 29 January, 2012, 09:34:39 PM
I was that tree.
This tree?
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ZGrx2SwpQ4Q/S0pTm-8cXuI/AAAAAAAABBE/cPMiMfv1CK8/s400/234956079_65ad8de465.jpg)





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 January, 2012, 10:04:18 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 29 January, 2012, 09:45:00 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 29 January, 2012, 09:34:39 PM
I was that tree.
This tree?
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ZGrx2SwpQ4Q/S0pTm-8cXuI/AAAAAAAABBE/cPMiMfv1CK8/s400/234956079_65ad8de465.jpg)

I'd say that's more a 5-litres-of-whiskey tree.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 January, 2012, 10:31:43 PM
I started my weekend by downloading our team's work schedule for the next few weeks, just to see what everyone else is up to, only to find that from later next week I have been put on a 2 shift pattern for the next few months, so instead of my normal hours I can look forward to getting up at 4.30 or getting home at 23.30  :(.

Now I'm pretty flexible when it comes to the hours that I work (I have to be in this job) but this change has come without any warning or consultation, they didn't even have the courtesy to tell me this was on the cards, so I was pretty pissed off and sent my manager an email telling him as much.

The whole thing has made me a grumpy bugger and cast a cloud over my entire weekend, my first one off this year. I have the wife's 40th and my Daughter birthday in that period and it looks like I can kiss goodbye to having any time off as there is nobody else who can do this role because the same corporate robot drone who is responsible for this has also fucked up by not getting enough people trained for this project.

I could always raise a grievance with HR I suppose, thus securing my place in the next annual redundancy brushfire.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 30 January, 2012, 07:40:07 AM
That sounds like a real p###take Rog from your employers. If you do complain you'll more than likely get the "if you don't want to do it I can easily find someone who will" answer. It's a horrible experience when you feel you are being taken for a ride, I know. Talking of which....

ordered 30 quids worth of music from someone on the internet 2 months ago. Did the records turn up? Nope. Did paypal get my my money back for me? Nope.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2012, 12:39:49 AM
Why do things smell like things? Yesterday the bread that my dad made smelt like the inside of a Burger King. Then just now my mum's fried eggs sounded like chips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 12:45:31 AM
I met the most fascinating person in the Social Welfare office today, with the hilarious (in retrospect) title of Jobs Facilitator.

I had specifically arranged an interview with her to see what supports might be available, or consequences incurred, in coming off the dole and starting and developing a new business, since I have a few half-decent ideas, and am getting nowhere finding regular work that'll cover both my mortgage AND my childcare, and am sick to the drokking back teeth of my current existence (although more time with the kids has been an unexpected blessing).  Reason I'm looking for some sort of support is that I have no capital of any kind, and will still have to feed my kids and the bank while getting set up.  Not unreasonable, I thought.

In between scowling at me, taking phonecalls, speaking in an unvarying terse monotone, spewing a stream of departmental- and scheme-acronyms at me (actual example: "if you want to know what level of JSA you'd get on a STEA you you'd have to talk to the CW officer in the HSE"), and calling me her 'client' (if used in the usual sense of the word, that's a relationship that would have lasted all of 15 seconds), she managed to impart this wondrous piece of advice:  my best option would be to remain on the dole for another 7 months, and then look into the business thing, as then i could reapply immediately if the business failed (as one of the 'long term unemployed'), whereas if I did it within the first year of unemployment I'd be completely screwed, as a self-employed person with no meaningful tax contributions.   

Severed from the appalling manner of its delivery (which included remarking that my wife's take-home pay was greater than her own and she had three children, as if by way of saying I should be happy with my lot - I'm not sure there's any way to see this as appropriate), this was actually remarkably helpful advice, coming from someone whose job it is to facilitate me getting back into gainful employment. 

So there you go, that's apparently the State's policy on digging us out of this recession: I should sit on my arse getting the maximum dole I can until it runs out, and be glad of it, and THEN try to get back on my feet.  Sure why don't I put my feet up while I'm at it, and pen a little note to the bank explaining that on the advice of the Department of Social Protection, I won't need to make any more mortgage payments until Saturn is in Gemini, and the omens propitious for my glorious return to the world of work.

(Yes, I realise that I'm the walking caricature of a middle-class middle-aged nob finally exclaiming in horror at what the Morlocks have to put up with day-in day-out). 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2012, 12:49:47 AM
What you need is a hobby.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 12:53:03 AM
Haven't got time, too busy posting drivel on comics forums.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 31 January, 2012, 12:57:10 AM
You're living in the Hoop.


Keeping so many on the dole, keeps them from marching the streets. It's a cheap bribe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2012, 01:03:10 AM
Maybe you need a change of scenery. Let me tell you a little about how I was raised...

I was born in the wagon of a travellin' show
My mama used to dance for the money they'd throw
Papa would do whatever he could
Preach a little gospel, sell a couple bottles of
Doctor Good

Gypsys, tramps, and thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call us Gypsys, tramps, and thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

Picked up a boy just south of
Mobile Gave him a ride, filled him with a hot meal I was sixteen, he was twenty-one
Rode with us to Memphis
And papa woulda shot him if he knew what he'd done

I never had schoolin' but he taught me well
With his smooth southern style
Three months later I'm a gal in trouble
And I haven't seen him for a while, uh-huh I haven't seen him for a while, uh-huh

She was born in the wagon of a travellin' show
Her mama had to dance for the money they'd throw
Grandpa'd do whatever he could
Preach a little gospel, sell a couple bottles of
Doctor Good


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2012, 01:04:51 AM
Seems there's only one way to get ahead in this world.

Cheat.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 01:06:43 AM
Haven't got the hips for it.  The tits, maybe.

EDIT:  That was in response to Roger's post, but it works equally well for Sharky's.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2012, 01:09:48 AM
Maybe start small, work 'under the books' or barter. Ain't no tax on barter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 01:19:15 AM
Oh I'm going ahead anyway, and starting small is the only way to go - in between tech training courses, I've been doing bits and bobs for no pay to maintain and build up relationships and skills, and keep up on rumours and developments,  and I've been accepting lunch, beer, leftover equipment and promises of future help in return for labour  That's about the only thing that's stopped me taking the old winchester up the clock tower, and it's been pretty heartening to find that I'm still of some use.  Still, it's hard to climb down from 60+ hours a week to a day here and there.   

I just thought the official position, and the embittered creature they hired to impart it, was amusing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2012, 02:16:49 AM
Good for you, Tordels - I wish you every success.

On an unrelated note, I can understand how these poor officials become so embittered. I imagine starting out in a job like that with every intention of helping everyone you can but being constantly frustrated by the system and seeing your optimism crushed and your humanity shrivelled. These people are to be pitied as much as the poor sods who rely on them for help. Goddam system - almost as if its very purpose is to keep us all down...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 02:26:26 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2012, 02:16:49 AMI imagine starting out in a job like that with every intention of helping everyone you can but being constantly frustrated by the system and seeing your optimism crushed and your humanity shrivelled.

In fairness to her, she was being helpful, and disarmingly honest - I was just pretty pissed off that this was the best advice she could offer, and wound-up by her simply incredible flatly hostile manner, unmatched in my experience (and I've been to France).  And you're not wrong - I'm only in that building a few times a week at most, and it depresses the hell out of me.  A career of it, with endless rounds of cuts, and ever-increasing workload... ouch. 

However, a lot of people work there, and the vast majority I've encountered are polite and professional, at least to your face (losing your paperwork as soon as you walk out the door, mind).  She just stood out by being none of those things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2012, 02:29:52 AM
Take her a cake with a bunch of antidepressants mixed in with it next time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 02:31:11 AM
Go to bed man, you have a job!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2012, 03:19:41 AM
Didn't mean any criticism of you there, Tordels. Just my half-arsed late night pontificating - as opposed to my usual half-arsed pontificating  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 11:20:42 AM
Careful now, or I'll accuse you of attacking boarders' personal integrity.  I have a history of this sort of thing.

-yawn - I've now been up all night doing tech-support for my brother, who's currently in Oz for work, but needs an unbelievably complicated video analysis setup assembled, packed and shipped to Kenya, where he'll intercept it in a fortnight (how Sprawl are we). 

I say 'doing', when what I mean is 'waiting around' while things don't download and then don't install properly, and the software guys in India who are supposed to be doing various fiddly things remotely don't get back to me.  Best of all I'm missing exactly one critical adapter from the spider's web of camera feeds and multiple screen outputs, and I can't even give out to the supplier because nothing in the brief suggested I'd ever need a 9-conductor-to-4-conductor firewire.  A great thing to discover at 2am.

At one point I drifted off and vividly dreamed that 9 demonically possessed babies were peering at me through 9 separate Skype windows.  And they call Shark mad.

The (large) compensation is that I'm getting to paw two magnificent virginal 17" MacBook Pros, to whom dualboot is as natural as whirring.

Now please excuse me, I must get back to sitting around at the taxpayers' expense.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 31 January, 2012, 11:23:49 AM
The last three episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic have all centered around the Applejack continuum. Sort it out, guys.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 31 January, 2012, 05:52:33 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 31 January, 2012, 02:26:26 AM
her simply incredible flatly hostile manner, unmatched in my experience (and I've been to France). 

:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 01 February, 2012, 07:17:46 AM
The alarm clock this morning. C.c.c..oo..old. Didn't want to get out of bed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 February, 2012, 01:13:34 PM
I used to work in a jobcentre and it is easily the worst work I ever did in my life. You accept the job because they hire you off the dole and you can't say no. Then you will know how unhelpful the system is to the jobhunters in the UK and Ireland. On top of that is an autocratic management style, fewer benefits than the rest of the civil service and tons of abuse and threats from some of the more violent members of the public. If you're not careful you get institutionalised and start treating all claimants as scum thereby mistreating some of the most vulnerable, honest and honourable people you are ever likely to meet. It is so depressing and I only lasted 8 or 9 months.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 01 February, 2012, 09:43:17 PM
Oh dear - it appears Ebay is refusing to recognise my user ID or password.

Kinda worried about that. I can't even contact Ebay about it because I need to use my ID and password to do it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2012, 09:45:43 PM
Try re-setting your password with the "Forgot My..." button?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 01 February, 2012, 11:36:56 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2012, 09:45:43 PM
Try re-setting your password with the "Forgot My..." button?

Yup - tried that. However, it kept taking me back to the log-in page.

In a bizarre turn of events, though, after failing to recognise my log-in details after several re-boots and a change of browser, it's working just fine now. Weeeeeirrrd... 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2012, 11:45:35 PM
Maybe try clearing out your cookies?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 01 February, 2012, 11:47:08 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2012, 11:45:35 PM
Maybe try clearing out your cookies?

Naw. If I eat at this hour, i'll get terrible indigestion!

B-dum tssh!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 February, 2012, 11:04:05 AM
Day 3 (...4? I don't know anymore) of my unpaid nocturnal tech-support gig and my sleep-deprived brain is losing the few beermat scratchings of a plot it once had.  After bashing our collective heads against the wall it turns out that a critical bit of proprietary database software just will not run on 64 bit Windows.  At all.  So now I have to somehow find, buy and get a 32 bit version of Windows installed on 2 shiny new MacBooks and do the whole painful installation process of half a dozen odd bits of analysis software again, before tomorrow when I have to pack and ship the whole setup.

I've been on Skype to a crowd in Mumbai for what seems like weeks now, and have developed a particular hatred for the hoover that drones and whines through their office at about 5pm their time, signaling as it does their imminent lack of interest in anything but the homeward journey.   This sort of all-night thing was more fun when I could sleep when I found the time, but my children are strangely unsympathetic for people that share 50% of my DNA.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 02 February, 2012, 12:06:48 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 February, 2012, 11:04:05 AM
my children are strangely unsympathetic for people that share 50% of my DNA.

Oh, I understand that. The happy noises of playing children are hell for the exhausted dad.

Try 10-minute naps, sitting upright in a chair. I've found them refreshing, and you can maintain some level of supervision even as you snooze. I'm not kidding.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 02 February, 2012, 01:15:26 PM
Unless, as happened to me once when Tiny Tips was about 3, I woke to find him stood on the top of the back of a chair, arms outspread and shouting "To infinity and beyond...".

Fortunately, he didn't launch himself off head first as it looked like he was going to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 February, 2012, 01:33:09 PM
My favourite example of combining a nap with parenting was when my eldest was about six months.  I'd taken him to a caravan by the sea to give his mother a break from his non-stop nocturnal wailings, and set the two of us up lying on a blanket under a sun shade for a nap after a long sleepless night.  He miraculously fell asleep on my chest, and I soon followed.

I awoke to find my chest unusually light.  He was gone.  I did a 360 from my lying position, but could see no sign of him on the ground anywhere, and I could see right under the caravan and car.  How the hell could he have crawled out of sight in the (surely) 10 minutes I'd been asleep?  I leapt to my feet and ran around the sand-dunes screeching like a madman.  No sign.  Turning back towards the caravan, and in the real horrors now, I espied my son and heir grinning at me, perched high on the caravan's tow hitch not 10 feet from where I'd been lying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 02 February, 2012, 02:04:13 PM
Bah. This is why I don't use ebay much anymore:

I bought three back progs from ebay a few weeks back. Now, I confess I was a little late paying for them, as it slipped my mind, but I noticed a few days later and paid via Paypal.  Over two weeks later and no sign of my comics. A quick check of Paypal confirms the money has been taken. I contacted the seller to ask what was going on and he suggested I "Fuck off".

Charming.

So, today begins the tedious process of keeping track of three different ebay disputes. Fantastic.

My advice? Steer clear of merlinmerchants. It would seem he's a bit of a cock.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 02 February, 2012, 03:30:52 PM
I just had my first bad experience with ebay (perhaps a sign of things to come). Bought and paid for a couple of comics in Nov. About three weeks later got an email saying the guy's employee was sticking it to international customers by pocketing the shipping money and tossing the product. Sad, but the guy at artifexgamescardscomics said he would make good and ship all outstanding orders as soon as.

Waited until the new year and nothing. Contacted the seller and he said he'd ship immediately. That was a month ago. I just went to leave negative feedback and the store is pretty much out of business. I didn't lose much, but I would have liked to have left a negative rating at least.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 February, 2012, 04:18:21 PM
I rarely use eBay so excuse my ignorance, but is there really nothing else can be done when people pocket your money without sending goods but leave poor feedback? I know that if you buy stuff by credit card the credit card company insures the purchase and can get your money back - if you have logged credit card details with paypal, could you maybe get your money back that way?

otherwise it seems like the perfect scam with no comeback for the scammer, just collect money with no intention of sending goods and no way of being forced to refund. Hmm, may try that myself ....  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 February, 2012, 04:27:23 PM
If the seller doesn't have proof of delivery - ie. not just proof of postage - PayPal will give the buyer their money back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 02 February, 2012, 04:39:04 PM
Unfortunately you only have 45 days to dispute the claim. I waited too long to start a case so I'm screwed on that front.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 02 February, 2012, 09:12:04 PM
I know the feeling. I'm never going to order anything out of the U.K. again. By the time you've allowed for postage from another continent to kick in, and contact the seller and wait another two weeks, the months up and you've lost your claim. It just sucks man!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 03 February, 2012, 12:53:43 PM
Oh, for god's sake. Now he's making out I'm trying to defraud him.
To the tune of three back progs, the most expensive of which was £1.45 (plus p&p).
What would be the point? It's not exactly heist of the century, is it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 February, 2012, 01:07:50 PM
It'd drive you mad, the whole thing.  My wife is a devoted eBay seller, and supremely careful in her dealings, but the hassles we have had even so... One parcel to the Ukraine saw a case taken against us for 'non-delivery'.  When the delivery confirmation was produced, they changed it to 'item not as described'.  And Paypal still yanked the cash back out of our account.  Again.

Another classic was someone who took a 'not as described' case over a €1 doll's blanket - because it wasn't big enough for a baby, even though the measurements and a photo of the blanket with a doll, were in the listing.

One of my personal favourites was a guy who was bleating non-stop about late delivery from the day after the sale (despite the terms on the item being 10 days from payment), so to shut him up I drove all the way to his office in another town and hand-delivered the damn thing, only for him to then go back on line and complain that he'd paid for postage (because my time and petrol is free, obviously), and (get this) that the item hadn't been packaged properly (even though it was actually nicely padded with bubble wrap and wrapped in brown packing paper).  What additional precautions does one need to take when you are handing the item to someone?

People, let us be clear, are gits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 03 February, 2012, 03:12:33 PM
What a total Tosser. It's for these very reasons that I tend to steer clear of ebay. Waaaaay too much hassle for me!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 February, 2012, 05:06:26 PM
as a seller, can you blacklist buyers who've messed you around in the past, or refuse to accept orders from someone with a poor feedback rating?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 February, 2012, 05:17:39 PM
You can indeed block specific buyers, and you can set rules for blocks of buyers too, but i forget which criteria you can use. 

There's no official way of blacklisting them or leaving negative feedback (because this could be seen as a way of strong-arming positive feedback from buyers, which makes sense), but there are all sorts of unofficial blacklists, which can be googled.

EDIT:  The wife maintains that almost all 'bad' buyers are complete noobs, and thus probably just don't know how to behave or are suffering buyer's remorse after a stupid bidding war, but she also notes that almost all ridiculously profitable sales are also to complete noobs, so if you do enough selling it balances out.  Those who are actually determined to be jerks are few and far between, she claims.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 04 February, 2012, 08:23:46 PM
I probably have worms.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 04 February, 2012, 10:40:21 PM
Are you sure they're not maggots Rog?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 05 February, 2012, 02:58:30 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 03 February, 2012, 05:17:39 PM
The wife maintains that almost all 'bad' buyers are complete noobs, and thus probably just don't know how to behave or are suffering buyer's remorse after a stupid bidding war, but she also notes that almost all ridiculously profitable sales are also to complete noobs, so if you do enough selling it balances out.  Those who are actually determined to be jerks are few and far between, she claims.

There's truth in that, but I'm also a little dubious of that as a 'catch all' explanation.

I had an experience recently where a piece of outboard guitar processing gear I was selling took a bid, but no payment was forthcoming. The buyer contacted me about three days after I emailed him enquiring after payment, only to say 'sorry man, I'm not in the country anymore, so I don't want the kit.'

Well why the bleedin' hell did you BID ON IT, you friggin' idiot?!

I call wilfull arseholery on that one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 05 February, 2012, 10:15:31 AM
1st rule of selling - the customer is always right.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 05 February, 2012, 10:32:30 AM
Quote from: wonkychop on 05 February, 2012, 10:15:31 AM
1st rule of selling - the customer is always right.

1st rule of working in retail - the customer always thinks they're right (and usually they're not)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 February, 2012, 11:28:15 AM
1st Rule of working in retail - never work in retail.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 05 February, 2012, 12:54:21 PM
It's like I went to argos just to buy a kettle, and came out with an "opera kettle" with an "ergonomic handle". All I want is a flipping brew. Light bulbs, try buying a simple light bulb nowadays, impossible there's about 2000 varities to choose from. I play safe and go for the eco classic. Don't ask me what an eco classic is because I ain't got a clue.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 05 February, 2012, 05:14:09 PM
Quote from: Tombo
1st rule of working in retail - the customer always thinks they're right (and usually they're not)

From the customer end:

I've been waiting for an item for a while. It's taken longer than normal so I sent a polite message to the seller last night just to make sure it had been sent.* I got a reply today which was rather catty:
"your item was sent ,AS ALWAYS, within one working day of your payment on 24th january."

AS ALWAYS? It's not as if I know the guy, right? I meant no insult, I know how people with good intentions can sometime forget things. It happens to all of us.

"i have done my bit as promised, but the one thing i cannot control is the postage."

Erm, I never said he could. I merely contacted him to makes sure he had done the first bit. As I said, I don't know him, but I don't think the tone of my enquiry was negative at all.

To his credit he did suggest I give it until Wednesday as that will be the 15 day period the Royal Mail allows before an item is considered lost and to contact him for a replacement if it hadn't arrived. I'm happy to do that. Smeg, I'll leave it until next Saturday, it's no big deal to me.

*I probably would have left it even longer if it were an item for me, but I'm actually ordering for a mate and he was getting a bit impatient. I'm happy to help out computer illiterate people but it can be a bit of a pain being the go-between sometimes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 06 February, 2012, 11:38:56 PM
Slipped over in some dog turd.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 07 February, 2012, 02:18:22 PM
I have lost weight and my trousers are too big. This could all go a bit Pete Tong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 February, 2012, 02:21:32 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 07 February, 2012, 02:18:22 PM
I have lost weight and my trousers are too big. This could all go a bit Pete Tong.


(http://www.beltme.co.uk/belt-blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/Halloween-Animal-Print-Belt.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 08 February, 2012, 10:21:48 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 07 February, 2012, 02:18:22 PM
I have lost weight and my trousers are too big. This could all go a bit Pete Tong.

(http://i.imgur.com/dy8Jg.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 February, 2012, 12:43:20 PM
I was reading the ebay related posts on the previous page of this thread last night and thinking how lucky I've been so far not to run into any serious issues myself. This morning the laptop that I took delivery of yesterday from an ebay seller packed in. FFS.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 08 February, 2012, 12:53:50 PM
What's the laptop doing? There's a few tek-squaxx on here that might be able to help (me, f'rinstance).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 February, 2012, 01:02:52 PM
Thanks Noisy, the problem appears to be the graphics card / chipset, I get screen artefacts after the machine has been on for a while and it soon gets to the point that it's unusable. It could well be a cooling issue but I only took delivery of it yesterday and I've had about three hours use from it, so back it goes :(.

I've started the returns process, I'm just hoping the seller doesn't choose to be a twat about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 09 February, 2012, 01:54:46 PM
I tied my belt tighter with a knot instead of using the holes and ate a packet of fig rolls. Thanks so much for your extremely helpful suggestions! *hugs*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 09 February, 2012, 11:49:02 PM
ok today I compleated step one of geting my life back on track today I went to a aperentship fair I looked round I got some good advise and saw some relay interesdting job ideres the only down side was that it was also opens to schools and collages so I was there for about a hour and a half befor the bus loads of kids went away and I could get nere the booths still not to bad I also got some realy good freebies for some reason GCHQ's freebies way way way outclassed all the outheres there.

any way my perents had droped me off so I was on my owen wilst they went to meat the assement oficer assing my bruotheres care needs or something like that im not very clere on this so I have to wait to be picked up so I decided to walk into town center and look round the shops still not bad except I carnt find the DVD I want any where eventily 5 hours arfter being droped off my perents come and pick me up now this is the problrm in that entire time I did not get a charnce to sit down not once and when I got home and I got out of the car my legs hert and now they still bloody well heret dam you sedterey life style.

so in short my knees and ankiles heret and I was unable to get the dvd set I want I know its a petery thing to mone about and partley my falt for being fat but dam it im not happy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 February, 2012, 09:23:18 AM
Valuable extra careers lesson there, Cyberleader:  the non-supermarket retail and food prep sectors are not for you.  Nary a chair to be seen for 8-12 hours.  Creating unbreakable ciphers, on the other hand... 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 February, 2012, 09:26:12 AM
Quote from: TordelBackCreating unbreakable ciphers, on the other hand...

--- Applause! ---
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 11 February, 2012, 12:50:57 AM
Quote from: Banners on 10 February, 2012, 09:26:12 AM
Quote from: TordelBackCreating unbreakable ciphers, on the other hand...

--- Applause! ---

lol

now onto anouther thing I swerre I must have broken a mirror or something as I keep geting blocked or made to shell out more money its geting redikilus first it was code geass season 2 geting cansled so I was forsed to get full price edichion then I have to buy 2 out of the 5 figeres I want off expensive webpages and just now I got a email for a dvd set I ordered from the usa 1 and a half weaks ago saying sorie were temporily out of stock it was £27 the next cheapest is £34 I tell you its a conaspericy im sick to death of evey thing I want to buy at the moment ending up costing me more money you know what I bet tomoro or some time next weak I will be moneing because customs will problay want to rip a lod of money out of me for a figer I ordered.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 February, 2012, 01:28:44 AM
I'm still not entirely sure that Cyberleader2000 isn't a ficticious persona created by Roger Godpleton to fuck with our heads.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 11 February, 2012, 06:36:50 PM
Definitely summat dodgy about 'im.

Slipped on ice and am just about crippled. The roads are clear - pavements like fucking ice rink!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 11 February, 2012, 08:08:55 PM
The match has been cancelled. Bloody useless Frenchmen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 12 February, 2012, 01:23:33 AM
Quote from: pops1983 on 11 February, 2012, 08:08:55 PM
The match has been cancelled. Bloody useless Frenchmen.

I remember our school's PE teacher making us play rugby in a hailstorm.  Something about building character.

Mind you, maybe he was onto something.  He also ran a black market in cheap kit, and the rest of the sports staff consisted of one who could only talk in mock Cockney-Italian ("You are the Mars-a-bar! The Numero Uno!") and another who spent most of his time rotating his penis with his spare hand via his trouser pocket.

Characters they certainly were.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 12 February, 2012, 07:26:49 AM
Those two were at my school as well, except one was a science teacher and would rub it through his trousers on the edge of the bench. It makes you wonder if these reports of time travel is true, and it's the same people? Should be on the life is so fortean thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 12 February, 2012, 08:42:20 AM
Quote from: A.Cow on 12 February, 2012, 01:23:33 AM
I remember our school's PE teacher making us play rugby in a hailstorm.  Something about building character.

Mind you, maybe he was onto something.  He also ran a black market in cheap kit, and the rest of the sports staff consisted of one who could only talk in mock Cockney-Italian ("You are the Mars-a-bar! The Numero Uno!") and another who spent most of his time rotating his penis with his spare hand via his trouser pocket.

Characters they certainly were.

Our PE teacher made us play hockey on a frozen solid feild. Before the game he said that he didn't want to see anyone flick the ball up. Ten minutes later, he flicked the ball....into my face. Spent the afternoon in hospital. :-/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Pete Wells on 12 February, 2012, 10:50:16 AM
Bah, the missus was taking the two kids to Edinburgh Zoo today with her family and staying overnight, leaving me with a pile of horror/sci fi DVDs to watch as well as a world of Internet 'gentleman's entertainment.'

However, this morning, the eldest has decided he's staying home with me. FFS, for once can I not just watch porn with the sound on!?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 04:45:25 PM
I'm putting this in here because I promised myself I wouldn't derail the movie thread any further- but Mr Lee Bates, a gentleman of otherwise unimpeachable loveliness, did cast aspersions upon my behaviour, basically claiming that I was in effect trolling, and asking why I would be watching clips and reading a thread from and about a movie I have no intention of seeing. This classes as a "minor impediment" and I demand my right to reply (even though I feel sure we've gone over this before)- and my right to punch said Mr Bates right up the bottom with my growling Incredible Hulk Hands should our paths ever cross.

It's really easy: I'm just not that into films. For me, it's all about the comics. In exactly the same way that I really don't give a fig about the various videogames that feature 2000AD characters, or the other other comic characters I enjoy, the upcoming Dredd movie is, for me, just another bit of merchandise.

However, of course I enjoy looking at the clips online, and the pictures and wotnot- it being related to 2000AD, it's all catnip to me. In much the same way that I can't not read those Down The Tubes Tributes or Front magazine- or laugh heartily at pictures of the Lizard from the upcoming Spider-Man 4. In the end, none o it matters, because I don't feel any overpowering need to see these movies. The Avengers looks great as a trailer- but the chances of me seeing it are 50/50 depending on whether my wife or I are free the day we take the boys. Actually less than that, because the boys may not want to see it. I'll probably go to the new Spidey movie, despite not really wanting to, as I'm sure they'll be chomping at the bit, and I expect my wife will draw the line at Andrew Garfield fighting a green potato for two hours.

But these days, unless I take the kids, I never go to the cinema. The exceptions to this are if I go with a client (like to The Inbetweeners) or if it's something very special, like Rise of the Planet of the Apes- a movie I absolutely loved... but won't be buying the DVD until I find it for £3 somewhere. The wife and I hardly ever watch movies in the evening anymore- and when we do it's either something we both are very excited about, or something with Vincent Price, Peter Cushing, or some horror anthology from the 60s or 70s.

The days of me seeing film as anything important are long, long gone. The Dredd movie to me, is less exciting than if they were releasing an original comic story for sale in shops (a "graphic novel" if you like, but lets not go there), or than if there was a new novel coming out. Films, like games, are something I just can't raise any enthusiasm about. Ages ago, someone posted a picture of an unofficial Judge Dredd bouncy castle- I see the new film as being like that. And just as I lapped up those pictures of the bouncy castle, and enjoyed the experience without ever once feeling the need to track it down and have a go on it, so I can look at pictures from the movie without ever once feeling the need to buy a ticket.

I like Judge Dredd as a comic strip. If the movie resembled the comic strip, I might be a little more enthusiastic- but as it stands, well, Ive seen Children of Men and Mad Max, I don't need to see them again.

So- everyone as they were! And thanks. Now, Mr Bates- watch out for my big green fists!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2012, 04:52:52 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 04:45:25 PM
It's really easy: I'm just not that into films.

That's not quite true though, is it?  From your posting here you love films, and have strong thoughtful opinions on them, to judge by your passion for some truly dire and pretty obscure ones (sorry!), and your strong dislike for many great ones (sorry again!).  What appears closer to the truth is that you, not unlike me, really don;t care about film (or game) adaptations of properties you enjoy in other media: it is indeed "all about the comics".   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 05:04:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 12 February, 2012, 04:52:52 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 04:45:25 PM
It's really easy: I'm just not that into films.

That's not quite true though, is it?  From your posting here you love films, and have strong thoughtful opinions on them, to judge by your passion for some truly dire and pretty obscure ones (sorry!), and your strong dislike for many great ones (sorry again!).  What appears closer to the truth is that you, not unlike me, really don;t care about film (or game) adaptations of properties you enjoy in other media: it is indeed "all about the comics".

Not really. If I am able to speak about films at all, it's because I spent the years 1985-2000 absolutely dripping in them. I made them for my own pleasure, I studied them at college and university, I reviewed them, I worked on proper films in various capacities, spent my time reading about them, had subsciptions to Fangoria, Film Review, Sight & Sound, The Dark Side, etc etc- but then I just fell out of love with the whole industry. I saw too many promising ideas screwed up by shitty productions and then lauded to the skies, and just realised I wasn't getting anything out of them anymore. I still enjoy the films I've always liked- and am lucky enough that I wasted so much time watching utter crap that there's still a few from the periods and genres I enjoy to keep me going. Of new films I see (maybe ten a year, in a busy year) I may enjoy two. This compares unfavourably to, say, 1986, when I saw absolutely everything that my local three screener showed at least once plus rented on average about four a week on VHS. That's hundreds of the buggers. These days a couple of months can go by without me seeing anything. For instance, the only film I've seen this year is, I think, Flash Gordon, yesterday- and that was only to keep the kids quiet.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 12 February, 2012, 05:14:39 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 04:45:25 PM
For me, it's all about the comics. In exactly the same way that I really don't give a fig about the various videogames that feature 2000AD characters, or the other other comic characters I enjoy, the upcoming Dredd movie is, for me, just another bit of merchandise.

Totally agree - no comment on any aspect of the film itself, but I just can't muster any enthusiasm for it, any more than I can for tie-in novels of my favourite tv series. I want my comics to be comics.

Also - and I may be alone here - the fact that it's going to take it into the mainstream puts me off. I like the fact that 2k is niche and somewhat under-the-radar and requires the man on the street to do a bit of legwork to find out about it. I can imagine nothing worse than a world where everyone on a high street was wearing Stronty Dog t-shirts and doing 'hilarious' impressions of Judge Death. I'd think 'Fuck off, leave my interests alone - I've been into 2000AD for years, you don't get to just come along and jump on the bandwagon.'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 12 February, 2012, 05:48:25 PM
SBT is in denial.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2012, 06:24:49 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 05:04:47 PM
If I am able to speak about films at all, it's because I spent the years 1985-2000 absolutely dripping in them.

Fair enough!  I'll amend that to 'you loved films'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 12 February, 2012, 06:32:55 PM
Comics and films are just a part of the entertainment industry. This Dredd film is just meant to keep people entertained for a couple of hours. It's not going to change the world. Why worry over it SBT?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2012, 06:34:19 PM
Quote from: wonkychop on 12 February, 2012, 06:32:55 PMWhy worry over it SBT?

I think the point is that he isn't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 12 February, 2012, 07:10:44 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 12 February, 2012, 05:14:39 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 04:45:25 PM
For me, it's all about the comics. In exactly the same way that I really don't give a fig about the various videogames that feature 2000AD characters, or the other other comic characters I enjoy, the upcoming Dredd movie is, for me, just another bit of merchandise.

Totally agree - no comment on any aspect of the film itself, but I just can't muster any enthusiasm for it, any more than I can for tie-in novels of my favourite tv series. I want my comics to be comics.

Also - and I may be alone here - the fact that it's going to take it into the mainstream puts me off. I like the fact that 2k is niche and somewhat under-the-radar and requires the man on the street to do a bit of legwork to find out about it. I can imagine nothing worse than a world where everyone on a high street was wearing Stronty Dog t-shirts and doing 'hilarious' impressions of Judge Death. I'd think 'Fuck off, leave my interests alone - I've been into 2000AD for years, you don't get to just come along and jump on the bandwagon.'

I kind of know how you feal back when I was litile bout 5 I saw star trek my mum saw I fell in love with si-fi (is that spelt right) and decided to expose me to doctor who for years people I knew never knew what I was on about when talking about then doctor who reapaired back on tv and bam everone thinks its cool it was nice they were taking a interest but it felt kind of fack as none of them knew any thing about the clasick series what was worses was people keept telling me about stuf I had allredy knowen about for months.

just a side not in 2008 I met a teacher at collage know for being a doctor who nut fan of bouth new and old watched it when it was on tv originily this was during a collage holiday when some of us came in to cach up on corse work any way one of my friends said about this teacher so I went to meat him fue minits later everone one on the flor had left there class rooms and had gaveres at the staff room and were watching in amazment as we went head to head in doctor who knolage as we tried to out fox each outher by firing obscoure doctor who knloage qustions at each outher I eventily beat him with one qustion spent the next collage year being know as the guy who beat the teacher in knolage. im geting off point here ant I

any way my point is I get the whole down side to this movie its also like transformeres I was into it 2 years befor the 2007 movie came out and all thros movies have done yes they have made more people awere but just made us proper fans have a much harder time as all its seams to have done is increases the prises we have to pay and made it a huge market for knock off Produts. I do hope thats the dredd movie dose not have the same efect on 2000AD
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 12 February, 2012, 11:27:59 PM
You mean "Sci-fi", Cyberleader?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 13 February, 2012, 12:08:44 AM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 12 February, 2012, 11:27:59 PM
You mean "Sci-fi", Cyberleader?

thank you
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 13 February, 2012, 04:29:17 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 05:04:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 12 February, 2012, 04:52:52 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 12 February, 2012, 04:45:25 PM
It's really easy: I'm just not that into films.

That's not quite true though, is it?  From your posting here you love films, and have strong thoughtful opinions on them, to judge by your passion for some truly dire and pretty obscure ones (sorry!), and your strong dislike for many great ones (sorry again!).  What appears closer to the truth is that you, not unlike me, really don;t care about film (or game) adaptations of properties you enjoy in other media: it is indeed "all about the comics".

Not really. If I am able to speak about films at all, it's because I spent the years 1985-2000 absolutely dripping in them. I made them for my own pleasure, I studied them at college and university, I reviewed them, I worked on proper films in various capacities, spent my time reading about them, had subsciptions to Fangoria, Film Review, Sight & Sound, The Dark Side, etc etc- but then I just fell out of love with the whole industry. I saw too many promising ideas screwed up by shitty productions and then lauded to the skies, and just realised I wasn't getting anything out of them anymore. I still enjoy the films I've always liked- and am lucky enough that I wasted so much time watching utter crap that there's still a few from the periods and genres I enjoy to keep me going. Of new films I see (maybe ten a year, in a busy year) I may enjoy two. This compares unfavourably to, say, 1986, when I saw absolutely everything that my local three screener showed at least once plus rented on average about four a week on VHS. That's hundreds of the buggers. These days a couple of months can go by without me seeing anything. For instance, the only film I've seen this year is, I think, Flash Gordon, yesterday- and that was only to keep the kids quiet.

It sounds like you've burnt yourself out on films, and possibly got to "see too much." They are still making decent films within the mainstream movie industry and beyond that I suspect you'd like. For various reasons I didn't watch many films last year unless they happened to be on TV, so I got a Love Film subscription to get me back into the swing of things, as it would be a waste of money not to try and watch as many films as possible. So perhaps one day you might find yourself getting sucked back into movie going again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 13 February, 2012, 12:27:14 PM
QuoteAges ago, someone posted a picture of an unofficial Judge Dredd bouncy castle- I see the new film as being like that.

That is a very logical way of looking at things - unfortunately I'm not sure a lot of people can apply logic to film adaptions.

I'd be interested to know which Dracula you put as the golden source and which you view as the bouncy castle. And how would you view a new dracula movie. (Not trying to trip you up, just understand how you reconcile things).

[/Godpleton mode engaged]
I see your Mom as being like that bouncy castle.
[/Godpleton mode disengaged.]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 13 February, 2012, 12:45:27 PM
Ah, Tips- that's a bloody good question. I'd have to say something like "I saw a Dracula movie before I read the book- or even knew it was a book, so in my head the Christopher Lee version (or possibly Scars of Dracula, as I think it was that one) would be my 'source'". But you're absolutely right, probably. I'd also have to say that I'm still at least notionally interested in horror films. If this Dredd flick had been a balls-out adaptation of Judgement Day, with wall-to-wall zombies, it would have engaged my enthusiasm- because zombie movies are my little nuggets of love. It's the styling as a 70s action movie that's killed my interest stone dead, I'm afraid. In much the same way as I've never been interested in the cinematic or straight to video adventures of Messers Schwarzenegger, Van Damme, Seagal, Chan, Stallone or Norris, except when they happen to cross over with my preferred genres (Predator, etc). I have, for instance, never seen Commando, or Cobra or Missing In Action 2: The Beginning, or Under Siege, or The Expendables.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 13 February, 2012, 01:05:02 PM
And I just realised I didn't answer your question.

Source: Lugosi and Lee. Maybe Shreck at a pinch.

Bouncy Castle: Langella and his wobbly eyes/ sausage fingers/ massive hair, Jack Palance, the BBC one with that bloke from Hustle in it, Louis Jordan, Udo Kier.

Gary Oldman's version gets a pass at my house because, while being a nonsensical pile of old shit, it has the decency to look better than any movie before or since.

Any new versions would be judged on the talent involved, how closely they stuck to the novel (or the post-novel iconography) and whatever odds and sods made them stand out.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 13 February, 2012, 01:40:07 PM
Zombies and vampires might appear as a bit old hat in the new Dredd film. We don't know yet, but maybe a stripped down version of Dredd without any frills might make a refreshing change to us brought up on the fantastic elements of the comic strip. It's hard to tell what the film's going to be like, but I'm not going to write it off due to lack of monsters.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 February, 2012, 02:03:08 PM
I think I get where SBT is coming from. I used to love seeing the latest films, but parenthood and related problems have killed that. I miss it, but it's not the end of the world.

As for comics-to-film, I'm just not bothered. Sometimes I see a comics-related DVD and enjoy it, but I certainly never feel huge emotions about this or that property being filmed. I just don't care.

My apathy for the Dredd film is overwhelming. I will see it, and if it's good I'll enjoy it, but I can't bring myself to get involved in a message board thread about it. I certainly cannot be arsed with the mahoooooosive discussions about it on here. Away and do the dishes, you fools. Stop slavering for a film that's months away.  :)

I like the comic, and that's enough.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buddy on 13 February, 2012, 02:30:18 PM
I'm skint!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 13 February, 2012, 03:36:18 PM
You wouldn't be able to afford a dishwasher then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 13 February, 2012, 08:35:16 PM
because twitter are stupid idiouts there web sight is broken again it wouint lket me tweat anything or direct message which means im now forsed to uses there phone app now this is not bad but its anoying as hell when im atachily sat infrount of the computer and have to uses a touch screan to type out tweats
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 13 February, 2012, 09:54:44 PM
life's a bitch at times
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 14 February, 2012, 12:13:50 AM
It's Valentine's Day again!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 14 February, 2012, 10:24:42 AM
I know it's a pain in the arse! Been sitting here opening cards and just realised the morning's almost gone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 14 February, 2012, 11:36:01 AM
Client: Please can you send me the stock image you have used.

Me: We're not allowed to give away or share stock images we have licensed, but you can download it here for a couple of quid...

Client: If you're going to be awkward, we won't work with you again. Just send me the image.

Me: ~whimper~

It's so difficult to do the right thing sometimes...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 14 February, 2012, 12:28:16 PM
Thats it The post ofice is scruing with me again theas boxies were dispached 2 weaks apart and they arive bouth on the same day year Im sick to death of the post ofice hording my packigies then they all arive at one some of my orderes are test orderes I need them quick im going to fila a complaint as this has to stop.

and befor you ask me what a test order is its where I order a chep japnises figer (or on ochion outher type of figer) from a set of figeres ive never ordered befor to see if I like them enouth to get the more expensive ones.

(http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/1783/postoficeisscureingwith.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 February, 2012, 06:51:39 PM
When I went to McDonald's today my coke was flat and towards the end of the cup it tasted of gas.

Prior to this, I attempted to pay for my meal using the touchscreens but they said my choice was sold out even though it wasn't when I asked the girl who I had been forced to talk to.

I wanted to see The Muppets Part 7: The Muppets but I forgot it was half term so even if it wasn't sold out I would still have been surrounded by stupid fucking kids.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 14 February, 2012, 11:45:39 PM
^ Cool Valentines day, Bro.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 15 February, 2012, 10:00:45 AM
not
(http://i.imgur.com/1mSH5.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 15 February, 2012, 05:31:44 PM
....snap
(http://i.imgur.com/BRDbC.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 February, 2012, 06:53:35 PM
Man, Rebellion are going to be breaking new ground with this court case!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 16 February, 2012, 11:30:14 AM
...my girlfriend has run into her very own personal Sc*j*...

http://geofferycrescentreviews.blogspot.com/2012/02/review-dark-trash-theatre-by-david.html

read the comment - this morning she also received a seven page e-mail describing what was wrong with her review, taking it apart sentence by sentence and telling her resolutely how ill-informed she was.

I thought she was being far too fair in her review....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 16 February, 2012, 11:54:26 AM
The telling line comes at the end of his reply, I think - ''there are many levels of complex meaning which you have missed, no doubt you were put off by the cynical brutality of the piece... I think few people will understand what is really going on with this book... maybe very few - I wrote it for the few, not the many...''

So she didn't like it because she didn't understand it, and (by implication) anyone who else who doesn't like it just isn't intelligent enough to understand it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 16 February, 2012, 12:59:27 PM
I kind of despair at that sort of reaction to honest critical appraisal.

If the audience doesn't get it, they don't get it. End of. If you're pitching a product to the perceived super-intelligents of the world... get ready for abysmal sales. if you have to explain it to your readers after they've read it, you're not doing your job properly.

So sick of seeing that sort of nonsense.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 16 February, 2012, 02:05:36 PM
Been off work for the last couple of weeks with some hideous cold/cough combo. Been feeling slightly better the last day or two, but the cough remained and with it, an aching chest. Just got back from the doctors....I now have a chest infection and she's signed me off for a further week. My employers will be overjoyed.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 16 February, 2012, 04:23:32 PM
My parakeet has learned how to mimic the little squeak our back door makes when it's pushed open, it's very off putting when you have the house to yourself and are engaged in some special alone time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 16 February, 2012, 05:08:05 PM
Shouldn't that be "my better half has taught the parrakeet..."?

Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 16 February, 2012, 11:30:14 AM
...my girlfriend has run into her very own personal Sc*j*...

Only if Sc0j0 was John Wagner, which is one of the less popular theories...

Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 16 February, 2012, 11:30:14 AMhttp://geofferycrescentreviews.blogspot.com/2012/02/review-dark-trash-theatre-by-david.html

read the comment - this morning she also received a seven page e-mail describing what was wrong with her review, taking it apart sentence by sentence and telling her resolutely how ill-informed she was.

I thought she was being far too fair in her review....

I like this:

Quotealso the book IS thin - but not because I only have a small amount of poetry - but because it was designed to be very thin

If only that'd work in school:

"Why is this essay only half a page"

"I had more I could have written, but I deliberately went for half a page. I see it as a statement about trying and failing to analyse the human condition"

"It was an essay about photosynthesis"

"I wrote it from the plant's point of view, horrified about the waste of paper, a product created through the industrial scale murder of its own kind"

"Get out before I slap you"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 16 February, 2012, 05:29:10 PM
I think you lot are quite fond of this person, and secretly miss him...........
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 16 February, 2012, 09:18:01 PM
My impression too. He's mentioned all the time. It's unhealthy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 16 February, 2012, 09:53:41 PM
He's like a scab people keep on picking at
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 February, 2012, 12:00:27 AM
Watched a lady beside me trading in games for cash in a major chain toy shop today.  She had a stack of about 30 brand-new titles, most for multiple platforms, including Darkness 2 for PS3 and X-Box.  That one came out last week.  Handling stolen goods is a crime, right? 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 17 February, 2012, 09:32:02 PM
People have got earn a living. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 17 February, 2012, 09:54:37 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 February, 2012, 12:00:27 AM
Watched a lady beside me trading in games for cash in a major chain toy shop today.  She had a stack of about 30 brand-new titles, most for multiple platforms, including Darkness 2 for PS3 and X-Box.  That one came out last week.  Handling stolen goods is a crime, right?

Which ones did you buy then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 February, 2012, 09:55:13 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 February, 2012, 12:00:27 AM
  That one came out last week.  Handling stolen goods is a crime, right?

Whenever I pop into Cash Gnerator to check for a bargain I always wish I'd brought popcorn and a folding chair to watch the selling queue. Its like a casting call for Shameless.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 February, 2012, 10:09:26 PM
Quote from: The return of Judge Jack on 17 February, 2012, 09:54:37 PM
Which ones did you buy then?

I tell you, it made me think twice about visiting the used games section there again.  Had the same problem with a secondhand bookshop in the Blackberry Market in Rathmines when I used to live there - I was completely in love with the place and its amazing selection until I noticed that it could be guaranteed to have multiple pristine hardback copies of pretty much any new release.  My run of dustjacketed Iain Banks stopped abruptly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 February, 2012, 10:12:08 PM
When there's a big queue at the supermarket and they open up an additional lane, it's always the people at the back who have been waiting in line for the least time who get served first at the new checkout.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 17 February, 2012, 10:28:44 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 17 February, 2012, 10:09:26 PM
I tell you, it made me think twice about visiting the used games section there again.  Had the same problem with a secondhand bookshop in the Blackberry Market in Rathmines when I used to live there - I was completely in love with the place and its amazing selection until I noticed that it could be guaranteed to have multiple pristine hardback copies of pretty much any new release.  My run of dustjacketed Iain Banks stopped abruptly.

I can see, though dont condone, why some smaller out of the way shops would turn a blind eye to this sort of thing, all those places with Ca$h in the title couldnt exist without it i guess. But im suprised by how widespread it seems to be getting, and how its moved more into the high street.

Quote from: Dandontdare on 17 February, 2012, 09:55:13 PM
Whenever I pop into Cash Gnerator to check for a bargain I always wish I'd brought popcorn and a folding chair to watch the selling queue. Its like a casting call for Shameless.

Yep, or alternatively, its what currys would look like 50 years after a nuclear war
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 18 February, 2012, 07:46:01 AM
I blame it all on the politicians and bankers and the culture of greed generally. Empty materialist values.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2012, 09:26:56 AM
Crom defend me from Bey Blades.  'Spinning tops', I thought naively, 'that looks like harmless sociable fun, positively traditional'.  But not only do they cost a fortune I do not have, not only do they form a foot-brutalising minefield the length of the Boy's bedroom, not only do they blast from my telly in a 'cartoon' where every character, even the narrator, screams non-stop, but they're on the bloody internet too - and unlike Nick Jr. that must be supervised at all times, even a pre-dawn Sunday (I ask you, what self-respecting paedo is going to be on online patrol at that hour?).  Online top-building and unending battles with American spodes who really should be in bed at 6am GMT.  But at least I haven't been asked to 'top up' in-game credits yet - which puts it ahead of the (-cough-) free Clone Wars MiniMMO, which was the Boy's last online obsession.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 19 February, 2012, 01:00:22 PM
I have been banned from befriending people on FaceBook for a WHOLE week, just as I was about to add Tordleback!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2012, 01:23:19 PM
Phew, lucky escape!   ;)



Nah, by all means add away when your time in the cooler is served.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 19 February, 2012, 02:02:06 PM
OK, I'll PM you as well!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 19 February, 2012, 02:46:06 PM
After a week covering a colleague's shifts while she is away on holiday, I was looking forward to Monday off.

Trouble is, due to the start of term and the fact that people keep giving us other work to do we're behind in our usual work, and there's a massive backlog of filing and other stuff to do.

I could sense the girl working with me was considering asking me in on Monday.... but she didn't and I left on Friday hoping I'd dodged it.

Then she called me today. "Are you available on Monday?"
"I... can be."
"That means you are then."
Gnnnn.

I know. Most people work five days a week anyway (and hopefully I'll still be off Wednesday) so I guess it's not a big deal really. It's not as if I won't be paid. It's just irritating when you're anticipating Monday free and making plans, etc.

I just hope I'm left to do the work I need to do. It's never that simple in a college though as you can just be getting into a job and then the phone rings or a tutor asks you to print or photocopy something, or a student requires something, etc, etc. I might just put my foot down if someone tries to rope me into something else. (That'll work.)

Hopefully that other girl is back now so they can cover that stuff. Or maybe I was called because she won't be in...

Gnnnn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 February, 2012, 06:44:20 PM
Beyond. Parody. http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2012/feb/19/richard-dawkins-disbelief-slave-trade-ancestor
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2012, 08:20:04 PM
Thanks for that Roger, it quite made my evening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 February, 2012, 05:36:59 PM
I've been thoroughly enjoying my rewatch of the first series of Buffy. To the point where I was looking at buying the rest and going for a full run. In between searching for it and putting a copy in my basket the complete box set went from £38 to £49. It's still bloody cheap, but it's still cost me an extra tenner. Bah!

Also I forgot to buy bog roll when I was at the shop earlier.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 20 February, 2012, 05:48:14 PM
Ho,ho, nice one Cosh! Do you need it now you've got us?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 20 February, 2012, 05:51:33 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 20 February, 2012, 05:36:59 PM
I've been thoroughly enjoying my rewatch of the first series of Buffy. To the point where I was looking at buying the rest and going for a full run. In between searching for it and putting a copy in my basket the complete box set went from £38 to £49. It's still bloody cheap, but it's still cost me an extra tenner. Bah!

I've been trying to convince sharky to watch it - he has seen and enjoyed Serenity/Firefly and Dollhouse, it strikes me as madness that he hasn't seen Whedon's magnum opus. Have words with him about this in Wednesday chat.

Quote from: The Cosh on 20 February, 2012, 05:36:59 PMAlso I forgot to buy bog roll when I was at the shop earlier.

See you over in the "wipe" thread later then.

Quote from: TordelBack on 17 February, 2012, 12:00:27 AM
Watched a lady beside me trading in games for cash in a major chain toy shop today.  She had a stack of about 30 brand-new titles, most for multiple platforms, including Darkness 2 for PS3 and X-Box.  That one came out last week.  Handling stolen goods is a crime, right?

It might have been CL2K's mum:

http://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php/topic,35360.msg652648.html#msg652648
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 February, 2012, 06:05:15 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 20 February, 2012, 05:51:33 PM
It might have been CL2K's mum:

Possibly, but she didn't have the harried look of a woman the mass composition of whose home is 93% Transformer, which I imagine to be an oriental version of the 'Mrs. Burdis'. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 February, 2012, 10:15:41 PM
DVD drive on my PC appears to have stopped working.

The PC appears to recognise the drive exists but the drive itself doesn't seem to read any CD, DVD or whatever I put in it.

Still, the PC isless than a year old (just) so I should get PC World to fix it under warranty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 February, 2012, 10:16:35 PM
Oh, and all those people that I'm having to add to my ignore file.  It's getting crowded in there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 20 February, 2012, 10:17:42 PM
If you ignore folk do they still see your posts?




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 20 February, 2012, 10:35:34 PM
Yes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 February, 2012, 10:38:06 PM
You also still see that they have made a post which has always made it rather pointless for me as I can't resist looking to see what they've said now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 20 February, 2012, 11:40:23 PM
Plus, the ignore function doesnt work on the mobile web version of the site, so if you use that to access it via your phone at all (like i do 99% of the time), you see all the posts anyway.

But yeah, the amosphere is changing in here. Id suggest using the report button a lot- sadly, you cant do that on the mobile version either.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 21 February, 2012, 12:23:47 AM
How do you ignore someone? I fear I'm being thick and blind
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 21 February, 2012, 12:44:52 AM
Quote from: pops1983 on 21 February, 2012, 12:23:47 AM
How do you ignore someone? I fear I'm being thick and blind

Here:
http://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?action=profile;area=lists
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 21 February, 2012, 12:45:16 AM
Who said that?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 21 February, 2012, 01:06:22 AM
Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 February, 2012, 06:28:20 AM
It's been many a long year since the ignore button beckoned, but I'm sorely tempted at the moment.  Reporting is all very well, but other than incessant pointless swearing and relentless knobbery, there's not much actionable going on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 February, 2012, 01:09:44 PM
Quote"other than incessant pointless swearing and relentless knobbery, there's not much actionable going on"

Yes, that was my thinking.  We can't really report someone for being annoying. So rather than report swearing (which can be a grey area anyway), I thought I'd ask the person doing it to cut it back.  That went well.

Everybody annoying is in my ignore file now so as long as I can resist the "Show me this post" button (which let's face it is quite easy once you realise there is never anything of value hidden), I shall be OK.

If you are reading this and proud that you've annoyed people, I suggest you take a good look at yourself and your behaviour and, maybe, I dunno, grow up.

If I see something dubious when someone quotes these muppets, I'll politely request they cut it out as well.

It's not a perfect solution but it works for me.

But I am miffed that they've tainted the purity of the COSPLAY and UNDERWARE(sic) threads.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 21 February, 2012, 01:35:17 PM
If you add someone to your ignore list, and then someone else quotes them in a post, do you see the quote or is also ignored?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 21 February, 2012, 02:17:24 PM
I'll tell him to go for the knob gag next time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 21 February, 2012, 03:00:41 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 21 February, 2012, 01:09:44 PM
Quote"other than incessant pointless swearing and relentless knobbery, there's not much actionable going on"

Yes, that was my thinking.  We can't really report someone for being annoying. So rather than report swearing (which can be a grey area anyway), I thought I'd ask the person doing it to cut it back.  That went well.

We are aware of it and have asked him to tone it down. We've also removed a few posts. Just reporting general posts at this stage would be a waste of everyone's time but if there is something offensive that might need removing then feel free to flag it up.

Quote from: Tiplodocus on 21 February, 2012, 01:09:44 PMBut I am miffed that they've tainted the purity of the COSPLAY and UNDERWARE(sic) threads.

There is only one solution get your head down and keep your pecker up, the threads will soon get through this damp patch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 21 February, 2012, 08:55:25 PM
keeping your pecker up always comes before the damp patch
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 22 February, 2012, 11:59:59 AM
what comes after?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 February, 2012, 12:19:46 PM
Snoring, usually.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 22 February, 2012, 12:22:45 PM
not if your'e way over on the damp side of the bed
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 February, 2012, 12:24:12 PM
Actually, I sometimes find the snoring precedes the damp patch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 22 February, 2012, 12:34:46 PM
True. I used to have dreams like that all the time once. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 22 February, 2012, 09:17:42 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 21 February, 2012, 03:00:41 PM
.... if there is something offensive that might need removing then feel free to flag it up.

Okay

Quote
There is only one solution get your head down and keep your pecker up, the threads will soon get through this damp patch.

How offensive! Reported!


Not really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 23 February, 2012, 06:53:26 AM
My APPLE TV packed up,
called apple,
NO PROBLEM SIR BRING IT TO THE NEAREST APPLE RETAILER
WE WILL REPLACE IT WITH A NEW ONE!!! :P
WOW,  :o :)

minor Impediment,
NEAREST APPLE RETAILER (not reseller please note)
HONG KONG!!!!  :'( :(

I live in Singapore.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 23 February, 2012, 04:14:19 PM
I feel your pain DD. Just this moment had a power cut while discussing the god particle on the science thread. I knew it was going to be one of those days today when I went to the cupboard this morning and found all I could have for breakfast was a bowl of dried twigs instead of my usual fry up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 25 February, 2012, 05:42:47 PM
3 weeks before moving to Japan, with a load of stuff still to do around the house, I come down with a case of....Shingles. Feckin' shingles. What is this the 19th century? Who gets shingles? (Me, obviously).

It's bloody sore and could hang around for months seemingly. Lovely.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 25 February, 2012, 06:30:21 PM
I had shingles. If youve had chicken pox you can get it at any time you are rundown.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 25 February, 2012, 06:55:47 PM
That's right. Becuase you've had chicken pox it doesn't mean you can't get shingles as the virus lays dormant in the nervous system after you've had chicken pox, you just won't "catch it of someone else; shingles is only contagious if you've not had chicken pox.

Looks like you might have to delay your journey to Japan van Dom. Sorry to hear it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 25 February, 2012, 11:07:39 PM
Must admit I didn't know you could catch it but it makes sense.

I just knew it could sit in you and wake up later on after the pox.  Docs told me that at the time I think.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 25 February, 2012, 11:52:50 PM
Because this has been a problematic week, both at work and in the far more important sphere of the comics i read. Not only could i not find the alt.cover of this week's prog and had to beg the kind help of a friendly boarder across the water, but last week i ordered four titles from various online shops- in an effort to save myself train fare to the comic shop. While it's been a pleasure to come home most days and find a new comic waiting for me (swamp thing #6 monday, frankenstein #6 tuesday, prog wednesday obv, and today the witch doctor one-shot), im still waiting for the new walking dead- which i was particularly looking forward to. And i havent yet found time to read the birth of venom collection that i picked up thursday. Bah.

SBT

Edit: but at least i dont have shingles. Sorry to hear that mr van dom, and hope youre better soon and in time for japan.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 26 February, 2012, 01:40:01 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 25 February, 2012, 11:07:39 PM
Must admit I didn't know you could catch it but it makes sense.

I just knew it could sit in you and wake up later on after the pox.  Docs told me that at the time I think.

Chicken pox is what you catch from a person with shingles.

http://www.medicinenet.com/shingles/article.htm (http://www.medicinenet.com/shingles/article.htm)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 26 February, 2012, 09:19:36 PM
Update: Shingles fucking sucks.
I've got three patches of them, one on my back, one on my side, one on my chest. Feels like I'm sweating Deep Heat all the time. Good thing it only affects one half of your body.....what a clever (or dumb) illness. The human body is wierd.
Had to get FIVE lots of tablets for this. I'm gonna be a junkie by the time it clears up!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 26 February, 2012, 09:32:05 PM
Thats crap Van, my Dad had those years ago and he was very sick with them.

Hope they clear up quick.

David

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 February, 2012, 09:46:19 PM
Aye, my mother had them too, and they were bloody awful.  Get well soon Dirk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Van Dom on 27 February, 2012, 09:10:39 AM
Thanks lads. Lucky I don't have a job to go to, what? Otherwise known as, if I WAS going to get this, why didn't I get it when I HAD a job to go to, so I didn't have to go!!!
I prescribe myself a day in front of the telly I think...well, I say that, but I'll get bored in about an hour. Never was able to do that whole vegging out thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 27 February, 2012, 09:24:31 AM
Well I must say your stoicism is admirable, if I was in your shoes, thank heaven's I'm not, I wouldn't be seeing it as "minor impediment", more as a major catastrophe. But then I've always been a bit of a pansy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 28 February, 2012, 12:18:18 PM
mY SHOULDER STILL HURTS
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 28 February, 2012, 12:20:29 PM
My sympathies, Tips. Mine too. In my case due to a long stint in a bad posture at computer, falling asleep on sofa, getting it yanked about in training and 40-something syndrome.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Third Estate Ned on 28 February, 2012, 09:01:49 PM
Came home today to find out my wife had parked in a restricted area and the car has been towed away. The only way to resolve this situation is to now fork out 120 cold, hard-earned and wasted Euros. It's hard not to estimate the financial worth of the worst moments recently endured at work and translate them into the money lost.

Also, it was interesting that in her telling of the tale the sum gradually increased, as if feeding it to me in doses would render me immune to the impact.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 29 February, 2012, 06:22:47 PM
It's leap year day. This year we get an extra day to make a bollocks of things. Grand.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 29 February, 2012, 10:19:33 PM
An extra unpaid days work.

But we get a day back for the queens shindig I guess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 01 March, 2012, 06:09:40 PM
What they give with one hand they take with another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 01 March, 2012, 07:52:38 PM
A sudden, intense stabbing pain in my ribs this morning and then twinges of agony throughout the day every time I twist or move suddenly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 01 March, 2012, 10:39:07 PM
Quote from: Van Dom on 26 February, 2012, 09:19:36 PM
Update: Shingles fucking sucks.
I've got three patches of them, one on my back, one on my side, one on my chest. Feels like I'm sweating Deep Heat all the time. Good thing it only affects one half of your body.....what a clever (or dumb) illness. The human body is wierd.
Had to get FIVE lots of tablets for this. I'm gonna be a junkie by the time it clears up!

Weirdly, I can vividly remember having shingles as a kid - I have some small scars on my chest as a reminder. Thing is, I could only have been 4 or 5 at the time, and as I understand it only adults can get it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 02 March, 2012, 03:15:15 AM
I just woke up in the computer chair ive been asleep for about a hour and my neck and back heret I hate it when I go to sleep here
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 March, 2012, 09:22:30 AM
I almost pooed myself yesterday. I've been doing a week of early starts and to maximise my sleep time I have been waiting until I get to work before I drop the kids off at the pool.

Yesterday was really foggy and it took me an extra 30 minutes to get in, by which time I was so desperate to go that I didn't think I could get out of the car and stand up. I took a chance on a fart to relieve some pressure and got away with it, but I was almost bent double by the time I had covered the 50 meters from the car park to reception.

When I got there there was a sign on the door from the security guard saying that he was on patrol for 10 minutes  :o.

I was trying to decide if I was better of just going in my pants or dropping a log in the big flowerpot by the door when I spotted the cleaner passing through reception and luckily he recognized me and let me in, lucky for him too I guess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 March, 2012, 09:50:46 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 02 March, 2012, 09:22:30 AM
I almost pooed myself yesterday.. [...] ..lucky for him too I guess.

Harvey Pekar lives!  I could actually see the Crumb-illustrated American Splendor strip as I was reading that, right down to the Pekaresque punchline...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 02 March, 2012, 12:57:55 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 02 March, 2012, 09:22:30 AM
I almost pooed myself yesterday. I've been doing a week of early starts and to maximise my sleep time I have been waiting until I get to work before I drop the kids off at the pool.

Yesterday was really foggy and it took me an extra 30 minutes to get in, by which time I was so desperate to go that I didn't think I could get out of the car and stand up. I took a chance on a fart to relieve some pressure and got away with it, but I was almost bent double by the time I had covered the 50 meters from the car park to reception.

When I got there there was a sign on the door from the security guard saying that he was on patrol for 10 minutes  :o.

I was trying to decide if I was better of just going in my pants or dropping a log in the big flowerpot by the door when I spotted the cleaner passing through reception and luckily he recognized me and let me in, lucky for him too I guess.

Age comes to us all.

I suppose you could have wiped with a slug.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 02 March, 2012, 01:01:59 PM
They keep playing that new single by Dappy on the radio.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 March, 2012, 02:02:56 PM
 :lol: at the poop story.

We take this stuff for granted when young.  It all becomes a major concern as we age.  Tis not good.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 03 March, 2012, 06:11:59 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 02 March, 2012, 09:22:30 AM
...drop the kids off at the pool.

I've never heard it called that before.

Sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 03 March, 2012, 03:27:46 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 02 March, 2012, 09:22:30 AM
I almost pooed myself yesterday. I've been doing a week of early starts and to maximise my sleep time I have been waiting until I get to work before I drop the kids off at the pool.

Yesterday was really foggy and it took me an extra 30 minutes to get in, by which time I was so desperate to go that I didn't think I could get out of the car and stand up. I took a chance on a fart to relieve some pressure and got away with it, but I was almost bent double by the time I had covered the 50 meters from the car park to reception.

When I got there there was a sign on the door from the security guard saying that he was on patrol for 10 minutes  :o.

I was trying to decide if I was better of just going in my pants or dropping a log in the big flowerpot by the door when I spotted the cleaner passing through reception and luckily he recognized me and let me in, lucky for him too I guess.
Shouldn't this be in the 'how do you wipe yours' thead?



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 03 March, 2012, 06:54:28 PM
Some people just can't get enough of the bog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 March, 2012, 07:13:27 PM
I've managed to put part two of the 2000AD panel from Cardiff onto youtube (It's on private at the moment before you look) but part one won't bloody load, aaargh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 03 March, 2012, 10:49:04 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 03 March, 2012, 06:11:59 AM
I've never heard it called that before.

Sorry.

You never read Viz before, have you?  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 04 March, 2012, 07:14:56 AM
It's lucky for some. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 04 March, 2012, 12:01:23 PM
Set my alarm for the middle of the night to catch a US listing on E-Bay, but didnt wake up till 10 mins after it had ended. Dang.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 12:15:03 AM
I worked 11 hours today, and when I finished I wanted dinner. For the first time in a while I enjoyed a cheeseburger with chips from my local kebab shop. This endeavour started off well when I saw that this meal cost the same as it did in 2008. This auspicious start lead to even greater pleasure when I started putting food into my mouth. The chips, cut into the french fried style were crispy and taut, a better chip than in any of the major fast food chains. The burger itself was as good as could be found in a kebab store type of environment. The decision to toast the buns really elevated the whole composition to a premium level of culinary poise and coherency. I did not regret spending money for this meal and would certainly not have resented paying more.

Then I washed this all down with the can of Dr Pepper I had purchased from said establishment. I must stress that I do not hold the proprietors of Sunat's responsible for this minor impediment and that blame lies with the Coca-Cola company. This can of Dr Pepper was not very good. Inspection of the can turned up the phrase "Now with less sugar." What kind of shit is this?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 05 March, 2012, 12:32:00 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 12:15:03 AM
The burger itself was as good as could be found in a kebab store type of environment.

I like the burgers from kebab shops. I generally prefer them to McDonalds, although the fact they don't come with the green pickle is a shame. I like that pickle, one of the things McDonalds got right.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 12:51:13 AM
It's called "gherkin."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 March, 2012, 01:16:02 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 12:15:03 AM
This can of Dr Pepper was not very good. Inspection of the can turned up the phrase "Now with less sugar." What kind of shit is this?

Aspartame. (http://www.naturalnews.com/034320_aspartame_sweetener_side_effects.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 02:06:04 AM
You ruin everything.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 05 March, 2012, 01:01:11 PM
I did a 12 hour night shift last night, I've only managed about 3 hours sleep and I have to do it all over again tonight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 05 March, 2012, 05:42:07 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 12:51:13 AM
It's called "gherkin."

I know. I went the descriptive route. Although I suppose it's sort of white a well as green
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 06 March, 2012, 08:17:38 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 05 March, 2012, 05:42:07 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 March, 2012, 12:51:13 AM
It's called "gherkin."

I know. I went the descriptive route. Although I suppose it's sort of white a well as green
Onion?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 06 March, 2012, 11:38:37 AM
What is the vegetable they put in kebabs?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 March, 2012, 12:24:34 PM
Lamb.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 06 March, 2012, 01:41:19 PM
cats
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 06 March, 2012, 02:10:26 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmxsYtIAqgQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmxsYtIAqgQ)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 06 March, 2012, 04:16:17 PM
Well whatever it is you only eat it when pissed up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 March, 2012, 03:28:11 AM
Turns out I can no longer fuel a late night working session with coffee and cheese and expect to go to sleep afterwards, despite plenty of exercise earlier in the day.  I generally do my best work between 9pm and 2am, but I can usually shut down immediately after and still get a reasonable snooze.  Is this what my rapid decline into old age means?  'Cos if so, quite frankly, it's rubbish
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 07 March, 2012, 06:40:08 AM
Going to bed on coffee and cheese will give you nightmares and your screams will wake everyone else up in your house. Try warm milk and Hob Nobs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 March, 2012, 08:12:07 AM
Quote from: fonky on 07 March, 2012, 06:40:08 AM
Going to bed on coffee and cheese will give you nightmares...

I'd have to sleep for that to happen. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 07 March, 2012, 10:18:38 AM
Porcupine Tree and Radiohead? Listen to one of their albums. It usually puts me to sleep. That or Ricky Gervais.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 March, 2012, 10:35:33 PM
Tesco's cashpoints have started to ask me if I'm considering buying Coco Pops.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 08 March, 2012, 11:02:42 PM
St Patricks day is coming, I love it in all its Paddywhackery glory, BUT the kids are in the local Parade, and If I hear ODonnell Abu badly played on a tin whistle again Ill crack up! They have been practising since the first of feicin Febuary!

David
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 09 March, 2012, 01:05:00 AM
I got so absorbed in a crossword on the train home from work that I didn't realise that I was on the wrong train! By the time I realised it was too late and I was stranded in the middle of nowhere. Had to shell out £20 for a cab home!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 09 March, 2012, 01:47:01 AM
Did the same thing on Monday and ended up in Woburn Sands. Some nice restaurants there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 09 March, 2012, 08:39:05 AM
I thought you were only interested in McDonalds and gherkins. Find any decent kebab outlets in Woburn?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 09 March, 2012, 11:59:13 PM
Half an hour ago, my girlfriend (who has clearly lost her mind) decided to tell my mum a humorous anecdote involving me and an overly strong hash cake, then took the royal hump when my mum didn't look amused. I'm now at home typing this, rather than drinking beer at my auntie's 80th birthday party. Arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 10 March, 2012, 01:46:59 PM
I have decided to cut out sugar from my diet and overall try and eat a bit less/healthier overall. I've always had a terrible sweet tooth a poor diet and it's about time time I did something about it.

Four days on, and last night I was literally dreaming about Cadburys Creme Eggs and Pop Tarts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 10 March, 2012, 02:09:47 PM
Had a blood pressure check at work, that showed that mine was a little high, so cutting crap out of your diet, and eatin healthier is maybe summat we all should be doing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SpetsnaZ99 on 10 March, 2012, 03:37:10 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 10 March, 2012, 02:09:47 PM
Had a blood pressure check at work, that showed that mine was a little high, so cutting crap out of your diet, and eatin healthier is maybe summat we all should be doing.

Eh! cos you have high blood pressure we all need to eat tofu... dont think so mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 10 March, 2012, 03:41:48 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 09 March, 2012, 11:59:13 PM
Half an hour ago, my girlfriend (who has clearly lost her mind) decided to tell my mum a humorous anecdote involving me and an overly strong hash cake, then took the royal hump when my mum didn't look amused. I'm now at home typing this, rather than drinking beer at my auntie's 80th birthday party. Arse.

Maybe she's pissed off with you not giving her the recipe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 10 March, 2012, 03:50:12 PM
I'm in the dog house.

The wife took my eldest daughter off to her ballet lesson and left me at home with our two year old.
They returned home a couple of hours later to find me sound asleep on the sofa, covered in gold star stickers in a lounge that looked like someone had nuked a branch of Toys R us and then walked playdoh all over the rubble.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 10 March, 2012, 06:47:49 PM
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 10 March, 2012, 03:37:10 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 10 March, 2012, 02:09:47 PM
Had a blood pressure check at work, that showed that mine was a little high, so cutting crap out of your diet, and eatin healthier is maybe summat we all should be doing.

Eh! cos you have high blood pressure we all need to eat tofu... dont think so mate.

Eh! Well, my comment was primarily aimed at Radiators post, though eating healthier is something we all could do, yes?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 13 March, 2012, 06:28:55 AM
Yeah it was on the news this morning, again. Bacon and sausages are bad for you, nearly as bad as smoking or radioactive fallout.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 March, 2012, 01:59:10 PM
E4 are no longer showing Gilmore Girls on infinite loop. What am I supposed to do with my two weeks off work now?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mudcrab on 13 March, 2012, 02:55:53 PM
Quote from: fonky on 13 March, 2012, 06:28:55 AM
Yeah it was on the news this morning, again. Bacon and sausages are bad for you, nearly as bad as smoking or radioactive fallout.

Yet here they are extolling the virtues of disgusting long-forgotten things that deserve to be forgotten and that shouldn't be fed to stray dogs, never mind people (you'll know the ones I mean, some are obviously sane enough). I feel quite sick after reading that...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-17337689

Minor impediments? Reading the right hand side of the BBC website. I need to learn to avoid it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 13 March, 2012, 06:12:15 PM
I've made an epic balls of something that should be simple - posting a letter. First I was out of stamps and it was too late to go to the shops, then I turned up at the Post Office after it shut, I went to the supermarket around the corner and they only had £1 stamps. Eventually I got some rather unpleasant looking Olympic stamps (after about 3 days of arsing around by this point) and I was just posting it when I noticed I'd put the stamp on the top lefthand corner.

I told my dad whose summary was "lacks social graces" but really I need a PA (or a "helper" I'm not sure which). ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 13 March, 2012, 10:41:17 PM
Tripe. They are always on about bringing tripe back. It even looks disgusting. Yuk.

Sod it! I'm off out for a kebab.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 13 March, 2012, 11:02:51 PM
last month, one of my day job customers had this to say:

'Sorry to hear about the stuff at home. That's really grim. We went through that with my mother. It's horrible. if we can do anything to help, let us know.'

To which I replied: 'Well, could you maybe post payment to me in future? (I usually have to collect money on foot - a tiresome, time consuming effort) it'd save me a lot of time, you see.'

'Sure buddy! We can do that!'

So, this month, I did the job, and two weeks later, the money arrives through my letterbox, in an envelope marked 'We don't need you any more.' Nothing more, nothing less.

Two-faced bastards.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 March, 2012, 11:09:22 PM
What absolutely charming people. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 13 March, 2012, 11:14:33 PM
Quote from: fonky on 13 March, 2012, 06:28:55 AM
Bacon and sausages are bad for you, nearly as bad as smoking or radioactive fallout.

I suspect that's more down to the shite that is fed to pigs in the insane, yield-obsessed meat industry.

To quote Noel Coward: "Shite in, shite out."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 13 March, 2012, 11:20:22 PM
Quote from: fonky on 13 March, 2012, 10:41:17 PM
Tripe. They are always on about bringing tripe back. It even looks disgusting. Yuk.

One of my childhood memories if of my Granddad eating raw tripe floating in a bowl of vinegar and once he finished he drank the vinegar.  :sick:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 14 March, 2012, 06:27:46 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 March, 2012, 11:09:22 PM
What absolutely charming people.

It's actually becoming quite a common occurence lately. I seem to get one of those every month, which is slowly chipping away at my daily income. And there's little to no new work coming in.

I'm getting really pissed off with my day job now. When it's going okay, it's easy. But when customers create a fuss like this, it's quite demoralising. Thank God I seem to have more comics work in the pipeline!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 14 March, 2012, 10:51:11 AM
Quote from: A.Cow on 13 March, 2012, 11:14:33 PM
Quote from: fonky on 13 March, 2012, 06:28:55 AM
Bacon and sausages are bad for you, nearly as bad as smoking or radioactive fallout.

I suspect that's more down to the shite that is fed to pigs in the insane, yield-obsessed meat industry.

To quote Noel Coward: "Shite in, shite out."


Well if you are a vegetarian you don't escape, because it's recently been found out that no matter how much you wash them before cooking, they still keep the crap on them that the farmers use to ward of pests and insects and whatever they stick in the ground nowadays to make them grow. Fruit's the same.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 14 March, 2012, 11:05:04 PM
I noticed today after dinner that a chip* has broken off of one of my teeth.

It didn't hurt at all, I didn't even notice it. What mildly worries me though is... where did that chip go?

Heh.

*By 'chip' I mean a tiny piece of the tooth itself, rather than a chip of the potatoey kind which is supposed to be broken with teeth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 March, 2012, 02:10:12 AM
Luck got cancelled.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 15 March, 2012, 07:16:45 AM
I'm not getting my end away enough.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 15 March, 2012, 10:00:15 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 15 March, 2012, 02:10:12 AM
Luck got cancelled.

Well this is a moral dilemma. David Milch is one of my favourite television writers, having created the unparalleled Deadwood - and Luck was a potential successor to Deadwood's crown being as it was full of intricate character drama and sweary sweary folk. However the nature of the sport means that some horses were badly injured during filming and euthanised. Three horses in fact. You'd think after the second unnecessary horsedeath they'd have plumped for some manner of tv trickery....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 March, 2012, 06:38:33 PM
Who gives a shit about a few stupid horses? Back in the day, if they wanted to make it look like Zorro had narrowly escaped from a carriage plummeting from a cliff they just drove a carriage load of horses off a cliff and had him jump out at the last minute.

I mean, it's not like they stopped making shitty emo action thrillers just because Brandon Lee died.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 March, 2012, 06:43:06 PM
PETA are total dickbags about this type of thing and have the means to make a whole load of trouble for everyone involved. I think they had just started filming the second season and it was easier for them to shut the whole thing down.

Also David Milch really, really, really likes horses.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 March, 2012, 06:47:48 PM
I don't. I think they're stupid and they shit in the street outside my mum's house.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 March, 2012, 06:50:50 PM
You should follow Steve's example as payback.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 16 March, 2012, 03:09:48 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 15 March, 2012, 06:47:48 PM
I don't. I think they're stupid and they shit in the street outside my mum's house.

Too right.  Dogs are the same.  Can't kick them far enough, in my opinion.

Cows, on the other hand, have the common decency to do it in fields -- out of the way of 'normal' folk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 17 March, 2012, 12:31:09 AM
bloody postman again im still anoyed over it ok the post ofice may be anoying as hell hording my post only delivering my packages on tuesday and friday but least the have they have the commen sens to put it in oure porch when were not in we leave it unlocked for that reason and the bloody temp postman left me a god dam card ive been waiting nerily a month for this boxset and he leaves a god dam card whats so hard about checking the fucking door handle we leave the inter door locked so they can leave the post in the porch whats so hard about that consept but noooooooooooo I now have to get up tomorow spend the morning trying to geting my dad to get up and go down the the post ofice as the package is in his name to pick up my boxset I wanted to spend the day in bed tomoro as ive had litile to no sleep this weak and have done 600 times more walking that I usichily do so feet and legs are killing me but noooooooooo can I have a lie in tomoro nooooooo and why caus the temp postman is a moron its unhelpfule sods like that who need to be shot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 17 March, 2012, 12:34:33 AM
Leave a note of your own for the postman?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 March, 2012, 12:48:09 AM
Quote from: SquashedFly on 17 March, 2012, 12:34:33 AM
Leave a note of your own for the postman?

:-X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SquashedFly on 17 March, 2012, 12:53:01 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 17 March, 2012, 12:48:09 AM
Quote from: SquashedFly on 17 March, 2012, 12:34:33 AM
Leave a note of your own for the postman?

:-X


He could kill two birds with one stones. Have the Postal issue sorted, and get his end away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 March, 2012, 12:53:56 AM
Walk more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 March, 2012, 01:00:05 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 17 March, 2012, 12:53:56 AM
Walk more.

Like you'd know about walking. Even your avatar's in a wheelchair...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 March, 2012, 10:10:07 AM
At least your postman tried. We've had DPD lose four extremely urgent and valuable consignments upgraded at some expense to a Saturday AM delivery. And is any bugger answering the phone or likely to help on a Saturday? Of course not...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 18 March, 2012, 09:02:17 PM
arrrrrrrrrrrrrr my day has gone from bad to worse first off I wake up late second I have to go help my dad move furnicher round at my dead uncle's house and wilst doing that I hurt my back I come home to find my recorderes hard drive is corepted so i have to format it loosing all the 12 films I was planning to watch this weakend and what finily kills my day I find that my thread got hijacked over a horibile argument and locked come guys its rule one if you have to argue do it in privet dont hijack outheres threads arrrrrrrrr >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 18 March, 2012, 09:58:41 PM
Hi Cyberleader. Have you managed to score yet? Or do the laydeez actively avoid you like they do me, as I'm a social outcast?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Judo on 18 March, 2012, 10:02:33 PM
yeah what happened? better than hollyoaks x
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 19 March, 2012, 01:58:38 PM
Answer: 20

Question: [spoiler]If it takes an infinite number of monkeys an infinite amount of time to write Shakespeare, how long does it take two monkeys to write Hollyoaks? - Frankie Boyle[/spoiler]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 March, 2012, 10:27:50 AM
Been up half the night puking my guts up. Good news is that I have taken a sicky. Bad news is that I still feel shit.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 29 March, 2012, 11:27:59 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 29 March, 2012, 10:27:50 AM
Been up half the night puking my guts up. Good news is that I have taken a sicky. Bad news is that I still feel shit.V


You might not want to hear this Vzzbux but it might be the Norovirus. :sick:

It's pretty bad I'm afraid, highly infectious. Much worse than the usual stomach upset.

Basically keep taking fluids but you'll properly feel very restless and uncomfortable for 2-4 days. Lack of sleep, aching limbs are fairly common.  Wash your hands a lot since it's pretty easy for others to catch.

Sorry to say it can only be endured. Had it twice myself so basically hunker down and DON'T go back to work to soon.   

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 29 March, 2012, 02:08:11 PM
Due to being too busy at work and in the evenings I wasn't able to get last week's prog until Friday, and it looks like it'll be the same this week.

And England lost the Test match today. It's now four defeats in a row which I think is the first time since the 2006 tour to Australia that didn't actually take place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 29 March, 2012, 02:27:53 PM
Masses and masses of faff today as my brother mailed me his smartphone to use for photos and 'net access up at Hi-Ex (my own phone got bust and I'm waiting on a contract upgrade).

Foolish foolish PRICK of a human that I am, I assumed when the inevitable "locked network" bullshit occurred I could get round it using my wily trickster ways. Un-fucking-fortunately it didn't work. And I don't want to pay some suspect individual £30 to potentially break my brother's phone. So I'm bringing my shite £5 phone and a giant useless brick of a smartphone to the con. Just as a camera. Sigh.

ON THE OTHER FOOT, Leigh Gallagher gave me a free sketch 'cos I was his two hundredth twitter follower. CRIKEY MATE!

(http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/535026_10151454927040187_766750186_23659843_1798959543_n.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 29 March, 2012, 03:19:32 PM
There are plenty of online places which purport to send you an unlock code, some even have a money back guarantee. Goodness knows if they work though...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 30 March, 2012, 08:46:42 AM
Another sick day today. Yesterday had a migaraine on top of the puking. Think it was food poisoning (The missus finally trying to bump me off, I am worth more dead than alive.)
A days rest for today and back to work tomorrow.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: the 'artist' formerly known as Slips on 30 March, 2012, 09:43:32 AM
I have had a shoulder niggle for nearly 3 weeks.  It means I can elongate my arm perpendicular to my body, not normally a problem, but I cycle so Ive been unable to cycle to and from work for that period and now have to use the car and changing gear isnt easy when you cant extend arm. 

Plus my shoulder was fine on wednesday so I cycled again and today its gone all sore again....  Fek! Grrr!  :crazy: :eh:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 30 March, 2012, 03:22:29 PM
Popped off to Forbidden Planet during my lunchbreak today to buy the prog but they didn't have it and appeared to sold out. It's good if they were, but means I have to go to another shop on my way home from work tonight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 30 March, 2012, 11:57:55 PM
Quote from: the 'artist' formerly known as Slips on 30 March, 2012, 09:43:32 AM
I have had a shoulder niggle for nearly 3 weeks.  It means I can elongate my arm perpendicular to my body, not normally a problem, but I cycle so Ive been unable to cycle to and from work for that period and now have to use the car and changing gear isnt easy when you cant extend arm. 

Plus my shoulder was fine on wednesday so I cycled again and today its gone all sore again....  Fek! Grrr!  :crazy: :eh:

Have you seen a doctor about this?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 31 March, 2012, 02:53:45 AM
Phone call 11.20pm
Boss heavy breakfast in the morning, 400 guests,
hotel want to burrow 50 of our chairs, cannot boss how?

Me, tell them sorry, we can't help this time.

Phone call 7am
hello, this is XYZ hotel, those 50 chairs your staff refused to give us THEY ARE OURS!!! your staff borrowed them last week.

things to do list, SPEAK TO STAFF ABOUT COMMUNICATION>>>>
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 01 April, 2012, 12:25:24 AM
Cos when you're trying to fight crimes it always stand to your cop buddies coming along trying to make you look uncool.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-17564941
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 04 April, 2012, 01:12:41 AM
Here it is folks, the death of Western Civilization: http://www.buzzfeed.com/katienotopoulos/iphone-users-disgusted-by-android-instagram
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 April, 2012, 01:24:35 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 04 April, 2012, 01:12:41 AM
Here it is folks, the death of Western Civilization: http://www.buzzfeed.com/katienotopoulos/iphone-users-disgusted-by-android-instagram

Sometimes you bring an unholy amount of joy into my drab life, Mr. W. 

That was truly great, and may well be one of the first really successful translations of the Linear A tablets from Akrotiri, although I question the use of the word 'instagram' to represent 'full syllabary' and 'Android' for 'palace seals'.  Other than that, spot on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 04 April, 2012, 01:30:51 AM
Glad I don't know what an instagram is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 05 April, 2012, 07:13:31 PM
I bought some cheapo jeans from Asda, they were a very strange fit and I couldn't get my hands in the pockets.

In future I really should check that the details on the hanger match the label on the jeans and I also noted for future reference that I ever decide to have a sex change, I appear to be a size 14.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 05 April, 2012, 11:11:12 PM
Failed to bake two cakes for Mrs Tips birthday today.  Managed (with daughter's help) to salvage one of them into ramekins and cover with chocolate sauce.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 05 April, 2012, 11:29:26 PM
Injured my elbow, painful and keep getting shock feelings in my hand.

No idea what I did , was just sitting down with hands gripped together, had been swimming and Badders in previous days though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DoomBot on 05 April, 2012, 11:31:26 PM
Power failure as my PC was booting. Now I have a corrupt registry and need to rebuild it.  Crappy pathetic windows 7 with all the robustness of a wet tissue. I should go back to Linux and stay there. Most unhappy today...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 April, 2012, 10:26:31 AM
I have to go to work today, when Jesus is out there dying. He needs me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 April, 2012, 10:46:17 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 April, 2012, 10:26:31 AM
I have to go to work today, when Jesus is out there dying. He needs me.

You just want first dibs on those sweet hipster sandals.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 06 April, 2012, 01:20:49 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 April, 2012, 10:26:31 AM
I have to go to work today, when Jesus is out there dying. He needs me.

Take no notice -- he does the same thing every year.  He's just an attention seeker.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 06 April, 2012, 03:31:27 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 06 April, 2012, 10:26:31 AM
I have to go to work today, when Jesus is out there dying. He needs my mom.

FTFY
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 April, 2012, 10:13:30 PM
Why isn't there any gum-based easter eggs? People like gum and they like chocolate. I know I would buy an Orbit easter egg and I think other people would appreciate getting 40 or so sticks of Doublemint in April.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 08 April, 2012, 06:16:19 AM
It's bitching time!

Last night while using a pub's wifi to check my e-mails, some drunken arsewipe approached me and told me I was a machinehead, obsessed with technology, and should interact with real people.  I told him he was making a ridiculous judgement about someone he didn't even know, he then told me he was joking and left.

I then listened to him not three feet away telling another guy at length how my generation, unlike his, has grown up without any sense of reality, and technology has made us 'too nervous to talk to real people in bars'.  This went on for some time till I left my e-mails and questioned him about it, he turned out to be 42, all of 5 years older than me.

The guy he was talking was 57 and very pleasant, and also very appreciative of technology and how it has made his life easier.  We let the other man rant on, and on, and on, and finally both left him to it.  I put the laptop away first though, telling him I knew it was upsetting him (oh, the guilty joy of petty digs).

Later on the first Harry Potter film (very popular here in Thailand) came on the telly and his rant turned to how this was 'propogating the idea that Eton-type public schools are superior to normal schools'.  I tried to tell him that it was a fun movie aimed at kids, but it didn't register with this master of real-life conversation, who came from Oxford and therefore 'has seen what it's like'. 

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 09 April, 2012, 10:54:22 AM
I have this week booked off work and we had planned on having a few fun days out with the kids because for once we're not completely broke thanks to my recent tax rebate.

My boiler has gone kaput and because of the bank holiday weekend I'm having trouble getting anyone out to look at it, so aside from the inconvenience of having no hot water and heating I also can't justify spending money going out on day trips because I have no idea how much I am going to have to pay out to get the boiler running again.

Bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 10 April, 2012, 07:29:06 PM
My missus has utterly, utterly, knackered her back. By which I mean, she is unable to walk more than two or three steps without needing to rest for 10-15 minutes. She's spent the last three weeks on a sun lounger in our living room (the angle slightly reduces the pain) off her face on severadol (tablet morphine) and a variety of other pain-killers.

This after being in hospital for a week in March, where the consultant said (and I paraphrase): "no idea what's wrong with you, please bog off."

So. She's not working, I'm burning up a week of holidays looking after our three kids and I'm very, very grumpy about having to do everything in the house - from cleaning bogs to making food to ironing - plus doing the day job.

And there's no diagnosis, never mind prognosis.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 10 April, 2012, 07:48:27 PM
Backs are tricky. When I put my back out the doctor (I use the term loosely) told be essentially the same thing, although he showed me one thing that worked for me and eventually helped me recover.

When your wife lies down she should put rolled up blankets/towels under her knees. Her legs should make a 45 degree angle and her full weight should rest on the roll. This kept me from turning in bed and relieved the pressure on my back allowing me to sleep and heal.

I don't know if this will work for your missus, but it's worth a try. Hope things get better for you both soon.

JvB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 10 April, 2012, 08:02:05 PM
Memory foam mattress can make a huge difference to back pain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 10 April, 2012, 08:02:05 PM
Yes, christ yes, hope she's better soon. I suffer from my back too, after being lamped by a gentleman having a psychotic episode eight years ago, ging me whiplash. It recurs each year, necessitating volterol and/or diazepam and co-codamol and three days off work in agony. All the best to her, and you!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 April, 2012, 08:15:02 PM
Rick Santorum dropped out  :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 10 April, 2012, 08:44:59 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 10 April, 2012, 07:29:06 PMThis after being in hospital for a week in March, where the consultant said (and I paraphrase): "no idea what's wrong with you, please bog off."

Sorry to hear that - my brother has just been hammered by sciatica and, despite not being quite as bad as your wife sounds, the hospital did all sorts to try and fix it: they had him strapped up, gave him pain killers, sent him off for nearly daily physio and took an X-ray of his spine. It sounds to me it might be an idea to go back to the doctors and strongly insist something more be done.

On the bog cleaning - I gave up using those foaming cludgie cleaners as squirting a bit of bleach around has the same effect unless you are heavily soiling the pan. Just do it before going to bed and remember to flush in the morning especially if you are planning number twos, as a free anal bleaching can occur.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 April, 2012, 08:54:27 PM
There's no such thing as a free anal bleaching. There is always a price to be paid.

Always.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 April, 2012, 08:59:53 PM
According to Ricky Santorum, anal bleaching is MURDER.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 April, 2012, 09:03:04 PM
Well, it's certainly no picnic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Greg M. on 10 April, 2012, 09:42:24 PM
Bother, appears my email's been hacked or something. (This seemed the right place for that sort of impediment.) Apologies to anyone on the forum who gets some weird spammy mail from me, 'tis not of my volition. Not entirely sure of how to remedy this, mind.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 11 April, 2012, 12:02:10 AM
Start by changing your password.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 11 April, 2012, 01:40:13 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 April, 2012, 09:03:04 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 April, 2012, 08:59:53 PM
According to Ricky Santorum, anal bleaching is MURDER.
Well, it's certainly no picnic.

I've clearly been doing picnics wrong all these years.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 11 April, 2012, 08:14:33 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 08 April, 2012, 06:16:19 AM
It's bitching time!

Last night while using a pub's wifi to check my e-mails, some drunken arsewipe approached me and told me I was a machinehead, obsessed with technology, and should interact with real people.  I told him he was making a ridiculous judgement about someone he didn't even know, he then told me he was joking and left.

I then listened to him not three feet away telling another guy at length how my generation, unlike his, has grown up without any sense of reality, and technology has made us 'too nervous to talk to real people in bars'.  This went on for some time till I left my e-mails and questioned him about it, he turned out to be 42, all of 5 years older than me.

The guy he was talking was 57 and very pleasant, and also very appreciative of technology and how it has made his life easier.  We let the other man rant on, and on, and on, and finally both left him to it.  I put the laptop away first though, telling him I knew it was upsetting him (oh, the guilty joy of petty digs).

Later on the first Harry Potter film (very popular here in Thailand) came on the telly and his rant turned to how this was 'propogating the idea that Eton-type public schools are superior to normal schools'.  I tried to tell him that it was a fun movie aimed at kids, but it didn't register with this master of real-life conversation, who came from Oxford and therefore 'has seen what it's like'.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that I personally am a bit of a gobshite too.  I met the same guy the other night, and without so much booze on him he's actually not a bad guy.  He said he understood that I was only getting in touch with my family at home and just wasn't very technically competent himself.  Ended up having a nice long chat with him about many interesting things.

Perhaps it's not him who shouldn't make huge judgements about people he hardly knows  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 11 April, 2012, 08:23:01 AM
Some people like to act an asshole when they are drunk. In a very ironical way. It seems to ignite a funny nerve in them. But they have to watch it. Do it too many times and the wind will change and they will stay that way.

He knows his failings now but age can erode such self awareness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 08:24:39 AM
I got some books from the Cinebooks stand at Hi-Ex.
I've started reading Aldebaran.
As soon as I opened the book the cover came away from the spine and the pages started falling out.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 11 April, 2012, 09:15:44 AM
Quote from: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 08:24:39 AM
I got some books from the Cinebooks stand at Hi-Ex.
I've started reading Aldebaran.
As soon as I opened the book the cover came away from the spine and the pages started falling out.  :(

WTF? That's terrible! The books I bought are OK.

You should email them and ask for a replacement.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 April, 2012, 09:31:13 AM
Perhaps if you hadn't buggered off early you may have looked at one in the hall and seen this defect and then exchanged it on the spot  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 09:54:04 AM
Quote from: Trout on 11 April, 2012, 09:15:44 AM
WTF? That's terrible! The books I bought are OK.

You should email them and ask for a replacement.

I'll be emailing them soon. Just unlucky with that one I guess. The other six books are fine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 09:57:41 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 11 April, 2012, 09:31:13 AM
Perhaps if you hadn't buggered off early you may have looked at one in the hall and seen this defect and then exchanged it on the spot  ;)

:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 11 April, 2012, 11:40:56 AM
Quote from: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 09:54:04 AM
Quote from: Trout on 11 April, 2012, 09:15:44 AM
WTF? That's terrible! The books I bought are OK.

You should email them and ask for a replacement.
I'll be emailing them soon. Just unlucky with that one I guess. The other six books are fine.
I thought this was a pretty common complaint with all Cinebooks stuff? Not that that means you shouldn't complain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: the 'artist' formerly known as Slips on 11 April, 2012, 12:56:48 PM
2 things this week so far....

1.  Your lack of planning and forethought, does not make it a panic on my behalf
2.  Who managed to patch racks of servers without following those little cable tidy things that are conveniently put down the side for such a purpose /rhetorical
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 01:14:10 PM
Quote from: Albion on 11 April, 2012, 08:24:39 AM
I got some books from the Cinebooks stand at Hi-Ex.
I've started reading Aldebaran.
As soon as I opened the book the cover came away from the spine and the pages started falling out.  :(

I sent Cinebooks an email this morning. They replied very quickly and are sending me a replacement. Well done Cinebooks.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 11 April, 2012, 04:18:34 PM
Quote from: George Dread on 11 April, 2012, 08:23:01 AM
Some people like to act an asshole when they are drunk. In a very ironical way. It seems to ignite a funny nerve in them. But they have to watch it. Do it too many times and the wind will change and they will stay that way.

He knows his failings now but age can erode such self awareness.

True enough.  Personally, I don't like to act like an asshole when I'm drunk. But sometimes, act like an asshole when drunk I do regardless.  The solution - don't get drunk as often.  I'll see how it goes  :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 13 April, 2012, 12:25:38 PM
It's Friday 13th, and although I don't consider it unlucky I'm a bit disappointed to see that the BBC no longer show one of the Friday 13th films to mark this. It was through the BBC doing this that I was lucky (?) enough to first see parts 6-8 during my teens. It's a shame that other kids aren't able to do this now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 13 April, 2012, 06:42:18 PM
Can't make a poll.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 April, 2012, 06:47:01 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 13 April, 2012, 06:42:18 PM
Can't make a poll.

Some ginseng tea and a peek at the Underware thread usually sorts me out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 15 April, 2012, 05:53:12 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 April, 2012, 06:47:01 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 13 April, 2012, 06:42:18 PM
Can't make a poll.

Some ginseng tea and a peek at the Underware thread usually sorts me out.

He shoots, he scores.

Had great fun today taking part in a city-wide water-fight in Chiang Mai today.  Later realised the 'waterproof' bag I got for my new Samsung smartphone was full of water, and the phone not working.  I really, really hope it works when it's dry
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 15 April, 2012, 06:00:21 PM
Put it in a bowl full of rice. It'll dry out faster
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 15 April, 2012, 06:08:33 PM
Really? Or am I just being very gullible?  Actually it's so hot here it'll probably dry out in no time.  Whether it works or not remains to be seen :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 15 April, 2012, 07:18:17 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 15 April, 2012, 06:08:33 PM
Really? Or am I just being very gullible?  Actually it's so hot here it'll probably dry out in no time.  Whether it works or not remains to be seen :(

I've heard of the rice thing.

Main thing is to take everythign apart, phone, battery and sim card give 'em a wipe and and let them all dry out. That's worked for me when the phone jumped out of my shirt pocket into the toilet. (I think I'd just used it too. Fortunately no solids.)

Mind you, I fished it out sharpish, and speed is quite important. I suspect your phone will work after  a water gun drenching though... but don't hold me to that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 15 April, 2012, 07:31:07 PM
it'll be fine. My old Nokia 3310 went through a washing machine and came out working.

Life is riddled with etc and so forth......because this is the second time today that I've had to charge my current phone. That old Nokia only needed charging once a week
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 16 April, 2012, 11:13:45 PM
I realy have to stop saying to the charity shop manager "anything interesting come in" every time I do she finds something that I want to buy and im trying to cut down as I just spent loads online
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 16 April, 2012, 11:28:13 PM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 16 April, 2012, 11:13:45 PM
I realy have to stop saying to the charity shop manager "anything interesting come in" every time I do she finds something that I want to buy and im trying to cut down as I just spent loads online

You're just waitin for the day she says "you" and strips off like a love-starved Bond girl!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 17 April, 2012, 12:07:31 AM
I have some sort of nostril zit. I shall spend a large amount of time convincing myself that this is actually the cans-cer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: the 'artist' formerly known as Slips on 17 April, 2012, 07:16:30 AM
Rain when you mostly cycle to work! :S  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 18 April, 2012, 03:38:18 PM
I've been feeling achy for a few days (like flu without all the coughing and sneezing) the last night I suddenly felt dreadful - a lump came up in my neck (lymph node I assume) just below my ear and the ear itself was sore (making if painful to sleep on that side). I was a hair away from hallucinating and only being able to drag myself up the stairs, so I necked a Lemsip (the only thing I could find with Paracetamol in it) and went to bed.

This morning I feel better and am... functional (thanks partly to some ibuprofen) but I've still got the lump and the on inspecting it in the mirror I can see the bottom of my ear lobe is impressive swollen - red and sore, like an insect bite (except the antihistamines I'm on stop insect bites from swelling up and itching most of the time, might slap some antihistamine cream on just in case).

It is all really annoying. I assume it is a virus and I'll just have to sit it out but I've got things to do now I can't really focus on and at the weekend it is a friend's birthday, plus I'm hoping to go to the Sea Odyssey event in Liverpool this weekend a few times (I went to the spider one they had a few years back and this looks even better):

www.visitliverpool.com/whats-on/search/sea-odyssey-p304651
www.guardian.co.uk/stage/2012/apr/17/sea-odyssey-giant-spectacular-liverpool

I'll be well miffed if I have to miss either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 18 April, 2012, 04:16:07 PM
I managed to track my Dad down to look at it and he diagnosed it instantly, as he has the same thing 30 years ago - red ear syndrome (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_ear_syndrome) (rubbish name!!). Interestingly it says it can be linked to trigeminal neuralgia, which I have and am being successfully treated for, it just happens my pills ran out a few days ago and I've not had time to pick up my prescription from the chemists. So I'm off to sort that out now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 April, 2012, 12:39:39 PM
I got a dead leg at fives on Tuesday night and it still hurts.

I was closing a window last night and the latch bit flipped out just as I was closing it and poked me in the eye.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 20 April, 2012, 02:52:11 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 18 April, 2012, 04:16:07 PM
I managed to track my Dad down to look at it and he diagnosed it instantly, as he has the same thing 30 years ago - red ear syndrome (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_ear_syndrome) (rubbish name!!). Interestingly it says it can be linked to trigeminal neuralgia, which I have and am being successfully treated for, it just happens my pills ran out a few days ago and I've not had time to pick up my prescription from the chemists. So I'm off to sort that out now.

Still no joy on the ear front so I'm going to drag it down to the doctor's for him to take a look at, once I can find a bag for my head, so I don't scare anyone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 20 April, 2012, 03:14:48 PM
This thread is better than Eastenders anyday  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 April, 2012, 04:41:01 PM
I hear a number of the writers are lurkers.  Remember the time Ian Beale wiped his arse with a slug?  No coincidence.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 April, 2012, 12:06:15 AM
Because im two fifths of the way through Black Hawk The Intergalactic Gladiator, he's just been zapped off to the alien arena and is about to fight the ravenous bugblatter beast from traal or whatever- a space dinosaur drawn by fill-in artist ramon sola- and yet i cant for the life of me forget the heartfelt and confused "Skree? Skree?" uttered by his poor, abandoned, bird as she flew in little circles around the place her nubian gladiator pal had been until a moment ago.

I cant remember anything about this strip- do black hawk and his hawk ever get back together? Their parting left me quite sad.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 21 April, 2012, 12:10:14 AM
Not that I can remember. I too feel your pain as far as the Hawk's departure was concerned.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 April, 2012, 01:13:06 PM
Another hour on the phone to TalkTalk customer services.  The individuals genuinely do seem like they are trying to help but they are backed by systems and scripts that don't appear to be able to deal with the slightest variation from the norm.  I'd have never willingly joined them but when they swallowed Pipex(almost as bad) we got pulled across.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 21 April, 2012, 01:50:04 PM
I hope Emp's ear is getting better. That sounds horrid.

I have been trying to build a new bicycle. It's a bottom of the line folding bike and the instructions are for an entirely different type of bike completely. I've used a lot of lateral thinking and I've almost got to the end. I just have to fix the lights, check the breaks and figure out the foldy mechanisim. I have NO idea how the bike is supposed to fold and the instructions are for a non-folding mountain bike.

I had to stop because my back felt like it was going to snap in two and my head was thumping. The air had turned blue too. I'll have another go at finishing tomorrow.

(It's quite cute - a silver colour. I've called it Frankie after Frankie Valli. He did a song called Silver Star in the 70s which occasionally occupies my brain and refuses to leave.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 April, 2012, 04:28:45 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 21 April, 2012, 01:13:06 PM
Another hour on the phone to TalkTalk customer services.  The individuals genuinely do seem like they are trying to help but they are backed by systems and scripts that don't appear to be able to deal with the slightest variation from the norm.  I'd have never willingly joined them but when they swallowed Pipex(almost as bad) we got pulled across.

I'm a customer of theirs too (unfortunately they are the only ADSL2+ provider on my exchange) and I've always found their support forums are a better way to contact them for technical help, it seems to bypass the first line support completely.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 April, 2012, 01:18:38 PM
This is not an anti-kickstarter project rant - I'm not opposed to the idea in the least.

But I drew one illustration for a short-story anthology. It's got to be eighty pages max, black and white. The author has suggested it will cost $4000 dollars to print.

"The funds raised through Kickstarter will be broken down accordingly:

• $3,370 will go towards printing the books (500+), shipping and handling, and setting up distribution.
• $750 will go toward promotional items (bookmarks, t-shirts and posters).
• $130 will go toward setting up Hance LLC as a legal entity." Wait, WHAT?

He's e-mailed all contributors every day since he set it up - unfeasibly it's already got $2000. I've written to him saying "good luck, please remove me from your mailing list I don't need to hear about this every day." He said fair enough. I'm still getting them - I've even routed his address straight to my rubbish folder.

I'm partially bitter of course, but I couldn't bring myself to beg like that about something that wasn't for charity or something. Just strikes me as outrageously greedy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 23 April, 2012, 04:56:34 PM
I've just said no to an art gig and feel bad. He was even offering to pay too (and has already paid for me for another job) but I haven't touched my own comic since November. I wish I had more energy and could draw faster. He's a good bloke and I feel bad about letting him down. Gah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 April, 2012, 05:08:41 PM
It is better to say no than to promise something you won't have time to deliver. Don't feel bad - feel good for being honest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 23 April, 2012, 06:39:23 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 April, 2012, 01:18:38 PMI'm partially bitter of course, but I couldn't bring myself to beg like that about something that wasn't for charity or something. Just strikes me as outrageously greedy!

It's a tricky one.

I think there is some resistance to this kind of thing on our side of the Pond as it just doesn't feel very... British ;) However, I have got over that and think that projects like Kickstarter are very important.

If we look at comics, you could, for example, use this for a pre-sales system (as seems to be the case here), which allows you to fund the printing in the knowledge that you have guaranteed sales. If people are interested in some of the extra incentives (like getting your name in the book or some merchandise) then no one is twisting their arm. I look at projects like Gutsville and Phonogram, and think how Kickstarter would have helped keep the wheels on such efforts, which in turn, helps sales.

It is even more important in film these days - at this year's Sundance Festival Kickstarter has funded 17 of the films being shown there (http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2012/apr/18/online-copyright-war-internet-hit-back), which shows how important it is for independent cinema (which is great in this era of blockbusters demanding 100s of millions of dollars to hammer out dull sequels). Back in the day the makers of small films would have ask around friends and family and/or to bust their hump to track down the individuals with disposable income they'd be up for risking on a film (dentists and doctors were popular - Evil Dead was funded by them (http://www.contactmusic.com/news-article/dentists-funded-horror-classic-the-evil-dead), for example) or do riskier things like take out a bunch of credit cards and max out the credit or test drugs on yourself:

www.totalfilm.com/features/7-weird-ways-to-fund-a-low-budget-movie

The beauty of crowd sourcing your funding is that you get access to more people who might not want to contribute as much as the backers from years ago but you make up for that in the numbers. So I can't see Kickstarter's importance fading any time soon, although I do wonder about "Kickstarter fatigue", however, each new project drags in new people so it keeps snowballing.

Of course, it isn't for everyone so I'm not trying to argue you round but it does make funding worthy projects easier and is only going to become more important in the future, so it isn't going away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 April, 2012, 08:35:05 PM
All I'm saying is that with that particular project it seems like he's asking for a lot and QUITE A LOT - I'm not arguing against kickstarter it's a bloody marvellous idea.

If I had the stones to do it I would... $2000 would pay for... five hundred or so issues of Dr WTF :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 April, 2012, 04:29:05 PM
I've ended up quasi-compulsorily on one of those there unemployment courses, allegedly aimed at improving my whoring skills (with the-piss-artist-formerly-known-as-FÁS, for my Irish chums).  This means, somewhat inevitably, that I spent the morning explaining what I thought my strengths (lovemaking of unusual intensity and duration, obviously) and weaknesses (no discrimination with the distribution of said lovemaking), and the afternoon ranking items in order of importance to jungle-plane-crash-survival (nobody else felt the rum should be No. 1).  Oh, and three trips to the subsidised canteen. 

Meanwhile, childcare for the day cost me €50 for one kid and invaluable grandparent goodwill for the other.  It's a day a week for 8 weeks, so that's €400 minimum, and unspecified amounts of domestic labour, it's going to cost me.  I'm unemployed for f***'s sake - indeed I had to be for at least 6 months to qualify.  My dole is €12 short of my half of the mortgage every week as it is. 

If I'm paying that kind of money I want more than 20 idiots preparing for a debate on why the second mouse is wiser than the early bird.  I want something that'll get me a f***ing job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 April, 2012, 04:34:54 PM
Do not question the indoctrination.
Embrace the mindset.

Be pliant.
Be durable.
Be productive.

And Above All: Consume.

Right, now back to work the lot of you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 24 April, 2012, 06:17:29 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 24 April, 2012, 04:34:54 PM
Be pliant.
Be durable.
Be productive.

You sound like an alternate universe Torquemada.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 April, 2012, 06:21:58 PM
Sharkamada to you, minion.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 24 April, 2012, 06:57:24 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 24 April, 2012, 04:29:05 PM
I've ended up quasi-compulsorily on one of those there unemployment courses, allegedly aimed at improving my whoring skills (with the-piss-artist-formerly-known-as-FÁS, for my Irish chums).  This means, somewhat inevitably, that I spent the morning explaining what I thought my strengths (lovemaking of unusual intensity and duration, obviously) and weaknesses (no discrimination with the distribution of said lovemaking), and the afternoon ranking items in order of importance to jungle-plane-crash-survival (nobody else felt the rum should be No. 1).  Oh, and three trips to the subsidised canteen. 

Meanwhile, childcare for the day cost me €50 for one kid and invaluable grandparent goodwill for the other.  It's a day a week for 8 weeks, so that's €400 minimum, and unspecified amounts of domestic labour, it's going to cost me.  I'm unemployed for f***'s sake - indeed I had to be for at least 6 months to qualify.  My dole is €12 short of my half of the mortgage every week as it is. 

If I'm paying that kind of money I want more than 20 idiots preparing for a debate on why the second mouse is wiser than the early bird.  I want something that'll get me a f***ing job.

I realise the answer is almost certainly no, but is there no subsidised childcare? That's mental.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 24 April, 2012, 08:56:27 PM
Quote from: Albion on 24 April, 2012, 06:17:29 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 24 April, 2012, 04:34:54 PM
Be pliant.
Be durable.
Be productive.

You sound like an alternate universe Torquemada.  ;)

We all know a modern day Inquisition would be working at the Job Centre, just underpaid and understaffed.

(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dSRG0yVy1_U/So_nL80I3QI/AAAAAAAAAiI/EiVvSvgV1g8/s400/The+Egregious+Pauline.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 April, 2012, 12:38:28 AM
Quote from: Trout on 24 April, 2012, 06:57:24 PM
I realise the answer is almost certainly no, but is there no subsidised childcare? That's mental.

The many, many official people I pestered on this subject were very sympathetic, but no, nada, nowt, nuffink. 

Despite a personal horror of asking for help, I'm actually going to go to the local Community Welfare Officer tomorrow and plead hardship  - if they can (allegedly) pony up €300 for kids' First Communion dresses, they can give me something towards creche fees (I've previously thought of asking for money for a chemistry set, a microscope or a telescope for my kids because I don't see the fecking difference... but I digress).  Of course the reason they won't give me anything is because my wife has a job.  Ignoring the fact that that I'd hardly need bloody childcare if she didn't.

I mock the predictable stereotypical group-encounter shite we were handed today in the name of 'career options development', but I really do need to do this course, and I really can't afford it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 25 April, 2012, 11:10:09 AM
Sorry to hear about that, Tordel. Really does show just how fucked up the whole system is in this country. Hope the course goes well for ye anyway. On the bright side, I'm assuming the tutor hasn't given you a banana and asked you to pretend that it's a phone so that you can have a conversation with an imaginary prospective employer? (I'm long enough in the tooth to remember when they actually used to inflict things like that on people doing FAS courses!). Best of luck to ye!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 25 April, 2012, 11:40:44 AM
Take your kids with you - sounds like they're not making you do anything worthwhile that they could get in the way of...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 April, 2012, 12:10:07 PM
Apologies for the pointless self-pitying whining there, people. 

Was in a deeply irritated humour yesterday:  I've been on a waiting list for over three months for this course (which has been postponed twice), and had understood (from my original application meeting) that I was going to get some form of childcare, so it was frustrating to discover that the course so far was just the usual 'group interaction' bollocks I've done several times before and I was going to be seriously out of pocket.  I found myself sitting opposite a guy from Rwanda who spoke six languages fluently and had a physics doctorate and 12 years experience in component testing and quality control reporting, and I couldn't help thinking "what this man needs is a job in his field, not re-training to be a receptionist or salesman'. 

It truly is a very minor impediment, just a niggle, at least from the other side of a night's sleep and cup of tea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 25 April, 2012, 12:14:45 PM
I just reached into my shirt pocket to get change and somehow pinched my right nipple between 2 coins. It was agony.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 April, 2012, 12:18:13 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 25 April, 2012, 12:14:45 PM
I just reached into my shirt pocket to get change and somehow pinched my right nipple between 2 coins. It was agony.

Intelligent design me arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 April, 2012, 12:26:13 PM
Tordels, you should set up a child-minding business for people who have to go on government courses...

But yeah, take the kids with you. If they refuse to let you in with them, make the course manager to put down in writing why they are refusing you entry. Repeat every time you have to attend. If they say you can't bring them, just say "I don't understand" (that's all, you've no need to give a reason) and keep on taking them anyway. Tell the kids to be naughty and run around the office. Make sure the office's insurance policy covers you and your kids while you're in attendance, if it doesn't, demand that it will. Get your fellow inmates to do the same with their kids. If the Gov aren't going to pay you the childcare, they should also have to deal with the consequences.

The Gov works for you, not the other way around, so approach these schemes on your own terms.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 25 April, 2012, 02:19:44 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 25 April, 2012, 12:18:13 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 25 April, 2012, 12:14:45 PM
I just reached into my shirt pocket to get change and somehow pinched my right nipple between 2 coins. It was agony.

Intelligent design me arse.

This made me guffaw. Until now, I thought guffawing was something that only happened in children's comics, so I am pleased to confirm it exists.

All the best, Turdelbonk. You deserve a break.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 26 April, 2012, 02:53:49 PM
I just got my smartphone fixed for free by my local Samsung customer service place - and have now lost most of the hearing in my left ear and a bit in my right so only get less than half of the stereo effect.
Nothing serious, I'm on a course of eardrops and pills to sort it out, but a bit of a pisser.

Tordelback, now your story is a proper pisser. Hope things start going your way soon. Pity there isn't a job vacancy for expert crossword solvers or highly effective point-arguers, you'd walk it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 26 April, 2012, 03:17:41 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 25 April, 2012, 12:26:13 PM
Tordels, you should set up a child-minding business for people who have to go on government courses...
He'd need to take a few courses before he'd be allowed to do that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 27 April, 2012, 12:24:22 AM
Went looking for my first ever flat to rent today in Bristol. I was mesmerised by the letting agent's ability to exude stupidity and also - at the same time - make me feel ridiculously naive.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfEra7DCClY&feature=youtu.be
<-- it was literally this
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 April, 2012, 12:58:38 AM
Two hues  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 27 April, 2012, 01:41:07 AM
TB: I know you mentioned wanting the course in the first place, but if it's of a compulsory nature, have the grandparent invoice the dole people, though you won't get professional rates unless they're a certified childminder.

I've been on a few of those courses, now, and the easiest one was when the person taking it told us to just amuse ourselves for the fortnight as best we could seeing as she wasn't actually qualified to teach anything, though the last one upped the ante through government decree that no-one was actually allowed to learn anything on the course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 28 April, 2012, 10:05:32 AM
Stupid postie is playing mind games with me. He delivered my last prog a day early last Friday and then just goes and walks right past my house this morning without delivering anything.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 03 May, 2012, 03:16:05 PM
I had a dream last night where McDonald's were selling Chocolate Omelettes. It was a square of egg with bits of chocolate in it that formed a smiley face. Then I woke up and it didn't exist. What is the real nightmare?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 04 May, 2012, 02:55:46 PM
We're having a new database set up for work. As I somehow pulled the plum task of being the staff liason with the people creating it, I've just sat through a three hour meeting going over the set up point by point.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 07 May, 2012, 08:40:33 PM
This crazy guy keeps sending me Ron Paul propaganda :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 May, 2012, 08:50:00 PM
It was Pokemon propaganda, you muppet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 08 May, 2012, 06:22:45 PM
I forgot to put the stew on. It's too late now. Fish fingers it is then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 May, 2012, 06:24:22 PM
mmmmm  fishfingers..... :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 May, 2012, 09:04:06 PM
I've just had fish fingers for my tea. I don't usually buy them as I don't have freezer, but I've been craving golden fishy goodness since you put the idea in my head.

I got good quality ones and I had 'em with crinkle-cut chips (proper, not out of a bag) and beans, with 2 slices of bread'n'butter and a big glass of Ribena. If only it was Six Million Dollar Man on the telly tonight, it'd be perfect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 09 May, 2012, 10:04:04 PM
My very favourite meal is fish finger and ketchup sandwiches with a nice bottle of red wine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 10 May, 2012, 11:32:15 AM
I got in to find the humus I was under the impression I'd picked up was actually non other than my nemesis Onion, Garlic and Herb dip.


Bloody Nora!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 May, 2012, 12:23:52 PM
Oh would you bloody stop raining, it's May now and I think the waterproofing's come off my skin at this stage.  My eyebrows are retaining water and that's just not right. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 10 May, 2012, 11:23:03 PM
There was chocolate in the cupboard so I took it. I thought that chocolate was chocolate. It was Tesco Value Plain Baking chocolate ergo bitter and gross.

Also it looks like The Cleveland Show is getting cancelled. It is my favourite comedy of all time. Why hast thou forsaken me, Fox?  :( :( :( :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 11 May, 2012, 09:37:01 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 10 May, 2012, 11:23:03 PM

Also it looks like The Cleveland Show is getting cancelled. It is my favourite comedy of all time. Why hast thou forsaken me, Fox?  :( :( :( :(

But on the plus side Community has been picked up for a fourth series. Hurroo!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 11 May, 2012, 10:40:40 AM
Thats good news indeed! Wasnt sure at the start but its grown into one of my fave shows. On the downside 30 Rock has been pish of late, much like the weather here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 May, 2012, 06:09:01 PM
So the tally this week:  started off with a broken car (gearbox shot, no money to fix), proceeded with a dead cat (addressed elsewhere), moved on to a broken tumble-drier (which I can't seem to diagnose despite hours of ploughing through a Haynes trouble-shooting manual with circuit tester in hand), and then developed into a full-blown non-functioning laptop (seems like logic board problem, feck) which I need for a critical meeting tomorrow.

And then to cap it all off, while round in my brother's house frustratedly trying to use his impressive computery setup to help fix said laptop I get into a stupid red-mist sweary storming-off fight with him right in front of his girlfriend, and say all sorts of untakebackable things.  Aargh, why do I only ever lose my temper and get creatively nasty with the handful of people who are actually on my side, instead of all the bastards that thoroughly deserve it.  It's like some bloody self-destruct button I can't help pushing.

So many impediments, all so very very minor, but in aggregate:  GRRRRRRRRRRR.

Beer me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 May, 2012, 06:14:07 PM
I reckon he'll understand you're going through a tough time. Beer is, however, an acceptable solution for the short term.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 13 May, 2012, 07:42:39 PM
... because even as one of Boko Haram (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-17790002)'s bad guys is taken into custody (probably (http://www.aljazeera.com/news/africa/2012/05/2012512134929196972.html)), Mexico (http://www.foxnews.com/world/2012/05/13/mexican-officials-report-dozens-bodies-dumped-on-highway-near-northern-city/) proves you really can't value the rule of law and integrity among public officials highly enough.  European liberal democracies rock.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 14 May, 2012, 04:35:35 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 May, 2012, 06:09:01 PMAnd then to cap it all off, while round in my brother's house frustratedly trying to use his impressive computery setup to help fix said laptop I get into a stupid red-mist sweary storming-off fight with him right in front of his girlfriend, and say all sorts of untakebackable things.  Aargh, why do I only ever lose my temper and get creatively nasty with the handful of people who are actually on my side, instead of all the bastards that thoroughly deserve it.  It's like some bloody self-destruct button I can't help pushing.

You aren't my brother are you?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 14 May, 2012, 06:13:55 PM
We didn't get into Berghain, so we went to Tresor instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 May, 2012, 06:27:53 PM
Quote from: Emperor on 14 May, 2012, 04:35:35 PM
You aren't my brother are you?

We'd have to ask Roger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 May, 2012, 01:19:36 AM
The most grittiest, realisticingist drama of all time, CSI Miami has been cancelled.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 15 May, 2012, 11:06:33 PM
I had to buy some pens so I went into the local art supplies shop.They had some rad Stabilo Fineliner pens priced at 95 pence and they even had a trial pad of paper out so I could test out just how smooth these pens handled. But I opted to buy a pack of six boring pens priced at 99 pence because they were for work and I would probably lose a nice pen at work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 15 May, 2012, 11:10:33 PM
That is just the kind of post that expresses the inherent melancholia of the minor impediments thread perfectly.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 18 May, 2012, 02:51:26 PM
I somehow failed to notice a fourth page of comic script to the story I am illustrating and now have a rush job on my hands. Gah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 May, 2012, 12:26:01 PM
The massage place I have booked for this afternoon (anniversary treat) can't be contacted by phone (disconnected) and their Facebook page shows suspiciously little activity for the last two months.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 May, 2012, 06:15:28 PM
My truly excellent night out was followed with grim inevitability by an afternoon spent in a small concrete-walled room in the company of twenty 6-year olds hyped up on sugar and (most likely interpretation) high-grade amphetamines.  By the end, my attempts to prevent internicene occular and cranial injury  during their ritual disembowelling of my lovingly-crafted pinata were half-hearted at best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 19 May, 2012, 10:21:20 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 11 May, 2012, 09:37:01 AM
But on the plus side Community has been picked up for a fourth series. Hurroo!

Dan Harmon has had to go because his planet needs him!!!!

Also some Mormons accosted me when I was at the shopping centre. I just walked straight past them and I didn't even have the gumption or nerve to shout a pithy rejoinder such as "HERETICS" or "FUCK ROMNEY" at them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 19 May, 2012, 11:48:37 PM
Quotegrim inevitability by an afternoon spent in a small concrete-walled room in the company of twenty 6-year olds hyped up on sugar and (most likely interpretation) high-grade amphetamines.

Once kids appear, this will ALWAYS happen after a good night out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: locustsofdeath! on 22 May, 2012, 06:43:44 PM
...because I can get the Meg (albeit two months late) at my Barnes & Noble - but they insist on stamping a price sticker on the bottom corner of every issue. Not on the plastic cover, mind - ON THE F'ING MEGAZINE ITSELF!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 22 May, 2012, 11:06:17 PM
My brother moved house at the weekend and it was my job to sort out the TV and computers. Unfortunately, the previous owner had taken the jacks from the end of cables from the satellite dish. This lead to a day and half of pissing around trying to find the relevant F connectors (it also included a crash course in TV cable terminology), not helped by the fact the cable was the cheap 4.5mm variety. I feel like I've driven the equivalent of here to Carlisle and back (which, unless you live in Carlisle, is always going to be guaranteed to be a long haul ;) ). Then they didn't want the TV where the cables come in and running an extension wasn't viable, so I had to work out how to set-up wireless TV with an off-the-shelf solution. If they'd left the connectors it would have taken me less than an hour but that was clearly not to be. However, although the chappie at the specialist audio visual seemed to consider it bizarre (after all they are only a quid each and you'd imagine they'd be fitted to the cables at the other end) I can't throw stones - when my folks moved out of their first house my (notoriously tight) granddad offered to lock up the house so they could start getting set-up at the other house, but when my parents spoke to the woman who bought the house they found out he'd made off with all the lightbulbs in the house. It was made worse by the fact that the lady was moving out of a battered woman's shelter and she'd clearly wanted as stressfree a move as possible, rather than having to spend the first night trying to cook in the dark.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 May, 2012, 11:10:43 PM
I remember when you made us all post in the dark.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 22 May, 2012, 11:20:03 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 22 May, 2012, 11:10:43 PM
I remember when you made us all post in the dark.

I still can...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 22 May, 2012, 11:21:11 PM
dare.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 22 May, 2012, 11:22:00 PM
Only if "Big Daddy" says you can.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 May, 2012, 05:09:58 PM
... my internets gone funny. Strangely it works okay here (although when I first tried to access the forum I got an error) but google doesn't work! (Basically I can't search for stuff. Some of my bookmarks don't work either.)

I'd imagine it's a server error their side, but I'll try the old 'switch the router off and on again' trick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 23 May, 2012, 07:27:35 PM
'cos I lost my beautiful Planet replicas Dredd badge. It's been on a shelf since Hi-Ex but a couple of weeks ago I decided it just looked too damn good on my leather jacket, so started wearing it - this also sparked a couple of surprise conversations with random Dreddheads. Today it is gone.

My biggest fear was that a bag-strap or some-such would ping the badge off the pin, but the whole lot's gone. So either: It dropped off on the way to work this morning - which is surprising cos it's a proper brooch clip with the swivel-locky thing; Or someone at work nicked it from the back of my chair, which I find even harder to believe.

All in all though - ARSEBISCUITS! It was one of the lovely matt-finish ones  as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 23 May, 2012, 08:30:34 PM
Dandontdare, that is a tragic story.  I feel your pain.
I got me one of those at Hi-Ex too and I haven't worn it yet, and probably never will. It's too good for wearing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 May, 2012, 09:43:34 PM
@ Emperor.
Should have PMed me. Best cable to use is RG6 with dielectric core not honeycombe. Most electrical shops would know the relevant f connectors you would require.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 May, 2012, 09:23:14 PM
I forgot to shave this morning so I bought the cheapest disposable razors I could find in Boots. I may as well have used glasspaper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 24 May, 2012, 09:27:29 PM
You need to shave more, bitch-face.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 24 May, 2012, 09:40:47 PM
When I practiced on your mom's pussy I accidentally lopped off her clit. :-\

It all turned out for the best though, as now she can call me when she needs a pick me up because I can stimulate her from thousands of miles away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 25 May, 2012, 11:31:33 PM
Now I love warm weather and I think that people who complain about it are dumb and gay, but a couple of things I'm not crazy about are:

1). Nipple chafing. I'm wearing polyester blend all day at work and things can get pretty scratchy.

2). Bugs all up in my shit. I have a giant bite on my left buttcheek, elbow and shoulder and I don't want to be in a position where I can't bite my fingernails. EDIT: And also on my back, I would guess next to the fourth link on my spine. I have to use a pen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 26 May, 2012, 12:04:32 PM
Are there swamps in Milton Keynes?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 26 May, 2012, 12:08:04 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 25 May, 2012, 11:31:33 PM
Now I love warm weather and I think that people who complain about it are dumb and gay, but a couple of things I'm not crazy about are:

1). Nipple chafing. I'm wearing polyester blend all day at work and things can get pretty scratchy.


I blame the moobs rather than your polyester fetish.



Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 25 May, 2012, 11:31:33 PM
2). Bugs all up in my shit. I have a giant bite on my left buttcheek, elbow and shoulder and I don't want to be in a position where I can't bite my fingernails.


Keep your shorts on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 26 May, 2012, 05:09:27 PM
My current minor impediment: The fist few continuous days of warm weather have prompted something into sending out great waves of pollen and so, despite the allergy medication, my nose and eyes are streaming - it looks like I've been watching a sad film probably one featuring a lovable animal dying of some terrible disease. Experience suggests my body'll rebalance in a day or so but until then I am producing my own weight in snot a day. Which seems like a wasted resources, could it not be made into food? What is the nutritional value of boggies? Is that what Soylent Green really is? To the Internet machine...

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 25 May, 2012, 11:31:33 PM
2). Bugs all up in my shit.

This will teach you a lesson for hoarding it around the house.

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 25 May, 2012, 11:31:33 PMI have a giant bite on my left buttcheek, elbow and shoulder and I don't want to be in a position where I can't bite my fingernails. EDIT: And also on my back, I would guess next to the fourth link on my spine. I have to use a pen.

Take an antihistamine and/or use some antihistamine cream.

Quote from: vzzbux on 23 May, 2012, 09:43:34 PM
@ Emperor.
Should have PMed me. Best cable to use is RG6 with dielectric core not honeycombe. Most electrical shops would know the relevant f connectors you would require.

Cheers. I had a word with my friend who knows a lot about it and he was rather disparaging about the quality of cable used too, barely adequate for normal satellite TV and really not up to HD. So it sounds like they might need to get it rewired at some point but as they've just moved and they've got a 1-year-old it might have to wait quite a while.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jon on 26 May, 2012, 09:40:30 PM
I managed to take a dive down a short flight of concrete steps in my back garden. Grazed most of my face and smashed out a crown. Luckily the dentist managed to glue that back in for a mere £75, but now my right eye is purple and swollen shut, my right arm seems effectively disabled and I can only turn my neck by about 5 degrees.

To add insult to injury there appears to be a colony of bees nesting underneath the bottom step and, by the feel of it, a few of them put the boot in while I was down.

Do I qualify?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 26 May, 2012, 10:40:49 PM
Yowch!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 May, 2012, 09:07:21 AM
What with old queenie having two bank holidays next week, we may not see the prog on our shelves til next friday. :-/

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 28 May, 2012, 09:51:42 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 28 May, 2012, 09:07:21 AM
What with old queenie having two bank holidays next week, we may not see the prog on our shelves til next friday. :-/

And the way the "same week digital" thing is going us digital readers might not see it until August.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 28 May, 2012, 09:52:28 AM
It cost me £20 to park in Brighton last night.
I parked the car at 5.55. If I had got there at 6.00 it would have cost the evening rate of £4.50.
Bastards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 May, 2012, 09:55:46 AM
If you'd've used the extra five minutes to send someone into a shop to buy the prog while you drove around the block, you would have saved yourself £13.15. Proof positive digital progs are a false economy.

SBT
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 May, 2012, 09:56:35 AM
It looks like I may have fractured my wrist last weekend. In my defence, I was running away from a zombie...
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 May, 2012, 10:56:35 AM
Just out of A&E. Happily, nothing seems to be broken. On the down side, I may have torn a ligament
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 May, 2012, 11:39:21 AM
Ouch and double ouch Jon and Noisy! 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 May, 2012, 02:53:21 PM
They're putting up bunting outside my house in preperation for the upcoming celebrations in honour of the Arch Traitoress. Bunting indeed. Grr.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 29 May, 2012, 09:12:08 PM
The guy I've been working with for the past 6 months is a real hero when it comes to not having sickies, he reckons he's not taken a day in the last 12 years.

The problem is he was coughing and spluttering all over the place at work last week, hence why I am off sick today with a nasty little virus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 03 June, 2012, 07:15:28 PM
Oh I hate that. It's all right for them being so tough but any one with a compromised immune system is f***ed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 05 June, 2012, 08:56:06 PM
FUCKING CLOUDS

The bane of all budding amateur astronomers.

And also amateur astrologers, but fuck those guys
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 05 June, 2012, 09:36:34 PM
FUCKING CLOUDS, HOW DO THEY WORK?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 05 June, 2012, 09:47:41 PM
Quote from: pops1983 on 05 June, 2012, 08:56:06 PM
FUCKING CLOUDS

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 05 June, 2012, 09:36:34 PM
FUCKING CLOUDS

Rule 34.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 05 June, 2012, 11:23:24 PM
Tonsil cheese / Tonsil stones.
Why the f--- do I have it? How the f--- do I get rid of it? Goddamn it...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 06 June, 2012, 02:03:07 AM
E3 sure was a barrel of fun this year, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 06 June, 2012, 09:09:43 AM
Throwing common sense to the wind and not wanting to disappoint the kids, I went camping over the long weekend while still suffering from the aforementioned nasty bug.

I got soaked to the skin helping a friend put his tent up and then spent three nights sleeping in the cold and damp before getting another soaking while taking my tent down.

I feel like shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 June, 2012, 11:44:49 AM
The floor next to my bed is always covered with progs, graphic novels and other comics and papers. last night I knocked a big class of coke all over them. I suppose it was an accident waiting to happen, but now I've got a lot of sticky comics.

And what's with this new paper they're using on the prog? Any drop of moisture and it wrinkles up like Norah Batty in a sauna!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 07 June, 2012, 02:45:00 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 07 June, 2012, 11:44:49 AM
but now I've got a lot of sticky comics.

C'mon. Those comics were sticky before the coke. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 07 June, 2012, 08:57:56 PM
Because shit broke down in work today and what I thought were spare, replacement components turned out to be broken components that my predecessor had gone to the trouble of neatly boxing up again. Why?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 08 June, 2012, 06:05:48 PM
I'm in the doghouse with Mrs Tips for not wanting to go see the Olympic Torch as it passed 500 yards from the bottom of our road and I was working from home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 08 June, 2012, 09:07:21 PM
I hope your lighter ran out of fluid right after it passed and that you couldn't use the stove either, you unpatriotic brigand.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 June, 2012, 10:21:00 PM
Went for a walk in the local woods yesterday and spent most of the time swatting mozzies the size of bi-planes. I seem to have been bitten several times on my head and they have all swollen up quite badly.

I now bear more than a passing resemblance to Middenface Mcnulty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 June, 2012, 10:22:52 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 June, 2012, 10:21:00 PM
...spent most of the time swatting mozzies the size of bi-planes....

I now bear more than a passing resemblance to Middenface Mcnulty.

Surely you mean King Kong?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2012, 10:27:29 PM
He's not swatting them away right this moment, is he?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 June, 2012, 10:31:08 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2012, 10:27:29 PM
He's not swatting them away right this moment, is he?

I think it highly unlikely that he has shrunk in the interim, not while parts of him are described as swelling up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 June, 2012, 10:36:23 PM
Maybe it's quantum swelling.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 June, 2012, 10:50:07 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 11 June, 2012, 10:36:23 PM
Maybe it's quantum swelling.

The minimum amount of swelling that produces any measurable effect?  That's more Roger's thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 11 June, 2012, 11:06:05 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 11 June, 2012, 10:50:07 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 11 June, 2012, 10:36:23 PM
Maybe it's quantum swelling.

The minimum amount of swelling that produces any measurable effect?  That's more Roger's thing.

The board is on very good form today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2012, 11:07:17 PM
I saw a Porsche in the car park outside the store where I work, but it was painted red like a Ferrari. All day I've been wondering about how this came about. Could they not get a Ferrari and so had to disguise their Porsche? Do they find Ferrari's gaudy except for the bright red colour? What a conundrum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 11 June, 2012, 11:47:17 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 11 June, 2012, 11:07:17 PM
I saw a Porsche in the car park outside the store where I work, but it was painted red like a Ferrari. All day I've been wondering about how this came about. Could they not get a Ferrari and so had to disguise their Porsche? Do they find Ferrari's gaudy except for the bright red colour? What a conundrum.

Are you sure it was really red? If the name badge of the Porsche read 'Cayenne', you may be suffering from a hypostatizational psychological condition.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 11 June, 2012, 11:49:56 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 11 June, 2012, 10:50:07 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 11 June, 2012, 10:36:23 PM
Maybe it's quantum swelling.

The minimum amount of swelling that produces any measurable effect?  That's more Roger's thing.



Only measurable by Large Hardon Collider.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 June, 2012, 12:58:26 AM
There are some really weird noises coming from downstairs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 June, 2012, 01:05:17 AM
Biologically or metaphysically?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 12 June, 2012, 07:14:07 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 12 June, 2012, 01:05:17 AM
Biologically or metaphysically?

HA!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 14 June, 2012, 09:13:18 PM
I believe my wife is trying to kill me. Yesterday My chicken wasn't cooked through which has left me shitting water all day. A few of my customers have had their pans splattered.
To top it off I made myself some cheese cobs and they didn't taste quite right. looked at my second one and it had mould on it.
If I am not on the board next week contact the police to investigate my wife.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 14 June, 2012, 10:49:53 PM
R. Kelly owes The Man $4.8 million. :(

Please don't send R.Kelly to jail. :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 14 June, 2012, 11:29:47 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 14 June, 2012, 10:49:53 PM
R. Kelly owes The Man $4.8 million. :( Please don't send R.Kelly to jail. :'(

In the pokey, R Kelly will come to reconsider his opinion that There Ain't Nothin' Wrong With A Little Bump 'n' Grind (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAXxkNaRkp8). You know what they do to nonces in prison, don't you?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 19 June, 2012, 10:50:31 PM
A procession of minor impediments indeed:

Next door were broken into very noisily the other night (a lump hammer to the backdoor will do that) and, even though I was awake and only feet away at some points, I missed the whole thing, including my neighbour shouting at them and three police cars turning up. Which was all very disappointing. Then it turns out they'd gone over the back garden walls and had a nose around quite a few of the houses including mine (my being up seems to have put them off completely but they gave another neighbour's house a go despite them being in too). Nothing stolen and everyone is OK, if a little shaken, but it does also mean I'm going to have to do a round of updating the security, I might end up helping the burgled neighbour too as they aren't very handy.

Also ZoneAlarm insisted on my updating to including an anti-virus as well as firewall, although you can switch the AV off. At least until it turned itself on, decided a vital component of AVG (the anti-virus I was using) was a virus and removed it, causing further errors to crop up, and there appears no way to fix AVG other than reinstall it, but then ZA will just remove it. As it is ZA being naughty then it looks like that'll have to go. Which is going to be more time down the drain.

In addition I seem to have managed to do my lower back in, whilst asleep. God knows how I managed that. Perhaps sleepwalking and kicking my neighbours door in?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 19 June, 2012, 10:58:02 PM
Lets just pretend I made a joke that involved hammering at your neighbour's back door, doing your back in, being 'burgled', and getting a virus, Emperor.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 20 June, 2012, 03:33:22 AM
Quote from: bikini kill on 19 June, 2012, 10:58:02 PM
Lets just pretend I made a joke that involved hammering at your neighbour's back door, doing your back in, being 'burgled', and getting a virus, Emperor.

Perhaps I should have started a new thread"Life is riddled with a procession of minor innuendos." I suspect if I examined my life it'd probably boil down to that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 June, 2012, 11:34:58 AM
This may help, Emps:

http://forums.avg.com/ww-en/avg-forums?sec=thread&act=show&id=40485

also:  http://forums.zonealarm.com/showthread.php?t=73429
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 21 June, 2012, 01:32:28 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 June, 2012, 11:34:58 AM
This may help, Emps:

http://forums.avg.com/ww-en/avg-forums?sec=thread&act=show&id=40485

also:  http://forums.zonealarm.com/showthread.php?t=73429

Thanks sharky but they are from 2010, this is a pretty recent problem I believe, since they forced people to upgrade to the firewall + antivirus.

http://moralde.com/zonealarm-deemed-avgs-avgcorex-dll-a-high-risk-virus/
http://forums.avg.com/us-en/avg-forums?sec=thread&act=show&id=209195
http://blog.zonealarm.com/2011/11/new-zonealarm-free-firewall-2012.html#comment-3789
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 June, 2012, 11:01:32 AM
I don't think the annoying pigeons that have been trying to roost on my balcony will be back - came back last night to find a half-eaten pigeon and veritable blizzard of feathers, which are a pain in the arse to clean up. Either the squirrels have turned carnivore, or the neighbourhood cats have worked out how to get up the scaffolding that's up at the moment. Cats: 1, Pigeons:0 maybe this should've been in the "sometimes sort of okay" thread instead!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 26 June, 2012, 11:49:05 PM
Stabbed myself in the hand with a pen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 26 June, 2012, 11:53:34 PM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 26 June, 2012, 11:49:05 PM
Stabbed myself in the hand with a pen.

I would advise the imeadiate draughting of a contract with Beelzebub, written in your own blood (or whatever courses through the Godpleton veins) granting you impossible skillz on the guitar.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 27 June, 2012, 12:29:22 AM
Got a piece of apple skin trapped down the gum of my wisdom tooth. Prodding at it only seems to make it worse, so I'm opting for painkillers to take away the pain and hope it sorts itself out (I've had toothbrush bristles and rogue whiskers caught in my gum before but they've usually come out quickly).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: exilewood on 27 June, 2012, 12:33:36 AM
Eeh, by gum...."Down the gum", "In my gum", what is it with Northerners and gums?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 27 June, 2012, 12:41:07 AM
Quote from: exilewood on 27 June, 2012, 12:33:36 AM
Eeh, by gum...."Down the gum", "In my gum", what is it with Northerners and gums?

Because, unlike soft southerners, we eat our fruit with their skins on. Including bananas and pineapples.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roger Godpleton on 27 June, 2012, 12:47:03 AM
Emperor will use any piffling incident to justify his prodigious painkiller intake.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 27 June, 2012, 02:35:00 AM
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 27 June, 2012, 12:47:03 AM
Emperor will use any piffling incident to justify his prodigious painkiller intake.

I have to get an opium enema before reading your posts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 June, 2012, 10:34:31 PM
Because ive had to have two days off work due to extreme back pain. Went to the doctor today, and was immediately sent to the hospital for an xray, with suspected cracked scapula. I have diazepam and tramadol to take in the meantime.

Tomorrow i have a camera shoved up my arse, so have d to spend the evening on my first course of movelat, and as a result hosing on the toilet. Have to do it again tomorrow morning- and i havent been allowed to eat anything since a bag of chips at lunch. Next food to pass my lips will be 6pm tomorrow.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 28 June, 2012, 10:51:38 PM
Blimey, I think that qualifies for "Life Spugs" as none of that is a minor impediment even if it happened by itself (other than eating chips).

My only thought is shoving a camera up your arse is an unusual treatment for a cracked scapula but I'm sure the doctor knows best.  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 June, 2012, 11:00:59 PM
Who knows them might tickle your G-spot.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 June, 2012, 11:10:58 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 28 June, 2012, 10:34:31 PM
Tomorrow i have a camera shoved up my arse, so have d to spend the evening on my first course of movelat, and as a result hosing on the toilet. Have to do it again tomorrow morning- and i havent been allowed to eat anything since a bag of chips at lunch. Next food to pass my lips will be 6pm tomorrow.

I had that last year - that Movelot stuff certainly works. Do not stray more than 20 yards from a loo for the next few hours. On the upside, the sedative they give you is bloody lovely. As they injected it, I remember saying "ooh that's nice - can I have some to take home?" before waking up back in my bed two hours later. Apparently I was awake and talking during the procedure, but it's like medicinal Rohypnol, I don't remember a thing.

I did awake to find a hideously colourful photo of my colon by the bed though, like I'd been on a ride at Alton Towers. I was then left to fret for two weeks till my follow up consultation as to whether that bilious vista was normal or a sign of terminal lurgy. (Luckily I have a very fine colon for a man my age, apparently).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 29 June, 2012, 02:05:53 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 28 June, 2012, 11:10:58 PMI did awake to find a hideously colourful photo of my colon by the bed though, like I'd been on a ride at Alton Towers. I was then left to fret for two weeks till my follow up consultation as to whether that bilious vista was normal or a sign of terminal lurgy. (Luckily I have a very fine colon for a man my age, apparently).

Sow us the photo or it never happened.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 June, 2012, 07:54:32 AM
Sadly, the one im having done is without anaesthetic. Or even an anusthetic, mores the pity. The movelat is effective, yet horrendous and im now on my second dose. Ahead of me i have an enema in six hours, then something probably the size of a 3D panaflex camera is going to zoom in for a looksee up my harry chuffer. Really looking forward to today! :thumbsup:

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 June, 2012, 08:27:32 AM
Sounds like a right spugarama to me SBT - the very best of Betegeusian with all that.   :thumbsup:

Maybe Michaelvk or Joe Soap could advise on the most comfortable rig for a Red One camera?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 29 June, 2012, 10:39:35 AM
Hi SBT! Perhaps you could quote Betty Davis' final line from "All About Eve" to your surgeon: "I'm ready for my Close-Up, Mr De Mille!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 29 June, 2012, 02:03:41 PM
Yowza, SBT – cracked scapula. Sounds off the scale painful.

Shoulders are complicated things. I have a recurring problem with mine which I made worse back in November and it's still giving me jip. I was supposed to get a letter for physio two weeks after I saw the doc but alas, no letter. Must get round to calling them.

I hope all went well today. As well as that kind of thing could go. Do they do it in 3D nowadays? (Sorry, shouldn't jest)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 June, 2012, 03:49:23 PM
Ive been here (posting from my private room, no less) for two hours and am due to go in soon. Avoided the enema, which was lucky.

Avoided as in 'dont need one', not 'stepped out of the way'.

I just want to eat something! It's been nearly 27 hours! Not even allowed a cup of tea! Right now id happily allow an entire bbc film crew, led by jeremy clarkeson access to my bowels, if they'd give me sausage and mash.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 June, 2012, 08:25:45 PM
I had that the other year SBT and I found the way they put the TV monitor right in front of my line of vision very interesting. You watch the camera approach and brace for impact and before you know it you are watching one of those programmes on the tv but it's not, it's your arse and bowels. Before I knew it, it was all over and I had the all clear. I suppose I should have asked for a copy to show at family gatherings  :lol:

I decided upon no drugs, as I just wanted to get back home before the rush hour traffic (I was seen at Tonbridge Wells, Drokk knows why).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Steve Green on 29 June, 2012, 08:32:26 PM
When I get that done, I'm going to have the music when they do the trench run in Star Wars.

Hope you're feeling better soon Steev...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 June, 2012, 08:49:04 PM
Quote from: Steve Green on 29 June, 2012, 08:32:26 PM
When I get that done, I'm going to have the music when they do the trench run in Star Wars.

"They came from... behind".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 29 June, 2012, 09:15:53 PM
I think we'll all be thinking about you SBT as you endure your own Trench run. Let's hope they don't bulls eye your exhaust port setting off a cataclysmic explo..sorry, sorry SBT got carried away there.

Hope it's not too awful and your well again soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 29 June, 2012, 09:19:59 PM
Cheers for the good wishes, folks. Yeah, I went without the drugs too, as i didnt want to faff about with recovery times and just wanted to get home as soon as possible. All went fine, and I'll get the results back in a week or so- but looking at the video, all looked healthy to my untrained eye. Amazingly I didn't even feel it when they snipped bits out of me for the biopsies.

If you will allow me one tale of nauseating disgust, that I found (after the event) quite amusing: They don't let you eat for over twenty-four hours, and clear you out using MoviPrep http://bkirkeby.blogspot.co.uk/2008/08/there-is-life-after-movi-prep.html , as a result of this, when the doctor greases you up and inserts the camera, you really don't have anything left in your intestines except air and some liquid. He explains that afterwards you will feel some bloating as he's forcing air in with the camera, to open the bowel. You'll want to fart, he says, so do it.

Post-procedure, back on the ward, you are very farty indeed. Then you are offered a drink and a biccy. Great! I went for a banana milkshake, and it was delicious. However, on the way back to the bus stop, I was still immensely farty, and thought I'd let a sneaky one out. No harm could possibly come of it- there's nothing up there to come out, surely? A-ha, no. If you remember nothing else you've been told today, remember this: When there is nothing in your body and you drink banana milkshake, said banana milkshake is processed very quickly. Twenty minutes after drinking it, I farted at the bus stop and hosed banana milkshake into my undercrackers.

Thankfully, I had the bus more or less to myself on the way home.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 29 June, 2012, 09:25:47 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 29 June, 2012, 09:19:59 PMThankfully, I had the bus more or less to myself on the way home.

Even though it was crowded when you got on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 29 June, 2012, 09:35:10 PM
I'm the one feeling unwell now. :o

Well that didn't sound to bad. SBT merely spray shat in his undies in public. What could be upsetting about that?

My heart goes out to you SBT.  Awful! I take back my crass joke immediatly. AWFUL!  :o :o :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 June, 2012, 10:19:15 PM
That's one milkshake that won't be bringing any boys to the yard.

You poor bastard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 June, 2012, 11:12:05 PM
Brilliant!

That nearly beats the slug  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 30 June, 2012, 07:47:22 PM
I am so glad I just had the cup of tea when I had mine now  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 July, 2012, 02:41:19 PM
I'm glad I wasn't drinking my tea when I read Tordelback's response else my screen would be wrecked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 01 July, 2012, 04:46:54 PM
Should we be a starting a new thread for ill board members? Lot of members not well these days, hope ye get better soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 01 July, 2012, 06:26:26 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 01 July, 2012, 02:41:19 PM
I'm glad I wasn't drinking my tea when I read Tordelback's response else my screen would be wrecked.

If you're suffering from the same explosive diarrhea as SBT you should try to face away from the screen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emperor on 05 July, 2012, 06:15:04 PM
I decide to stick a rocket up the arse of a seller on eBay after my order hadn't turned up in over week. Checking to see who it was I find that in fact I never did make the order. Apparently not every part of the Internet is thought-controlled, although this is probably for the best but still... I order it and they refunded my money. Apparently this is not meant to be. Clearly the Internet is being very badly behaved and we will need to have words, I just have to go and stick a rocket up my arse, then go to hospital. My bottom will probably still be better off than SBT's.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 07 July, 2012, 09:28:32 AM
... because this article turns out not to be providing a suggestion for the ideal holiday destination

NICOTINE, VALIUM, VICODIN, MARIJUANA, ECSTACY AND ALCOHOL (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-18736585)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 08 July, 2012, 09:20:25 AM
Guess who forgot his 11th wedding anniversary?
OOOOOOOP's.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin MacNeil on 08 July, 2012, 10:01:57 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 08 July, 2012, 09:20:25 AM
Guess who forgot his 11th wedding anniversary?
OOOOOOOP's.

I was going to say that I was having a crap evening after driving a screw through a water pipe under the floor leading to copious amounts of water flooding down through the downstairs ceiling, however after your problems Vzzbux I don't feel so bad any more.

I feel lucky in comparison to you. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 09 July, 2012, 11:12:32 PM
It's not that bad Colin although I am sleeping with one eye open. The missus seems pretty fine about it. I have not long bought her a motorola tablet so that may have sweetened it a little.
Other to note my eldest is 16 tomorrow. God I feel old.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 July, 2012, 02:35:01 PM
I reluctantly agreed to do 3 hours of "essential" training as overtime as they don't have enough bodies to take us all off the phones during our normal shifts. So today I'm supposed to be working 8-4:30, with training 5-8, but they've just told us that both people on the late shift are off sick so could we just work through?  12 bloody hours!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 July, 2012, 10:22:31 PM
Funny that our company I work for likes to move the goal posts like that.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 14 July, 2012, 12:23:37 PM
Because it's half twelve and there's no prog 1792 thread. Im tempted to start one just to bemoan this fact, but feel thse who take that kind of behaviour far too seriously may have heart attacks.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 31 July, 2012, 05:57:41 PM
BT have decided to fuck up my e-mail . That's just what I pay you for you fucking clowns.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 31 July, 2012, 06:18:54 PM
Last week I also had the camera shoved up the poop-pipe and I can confirm the drugs they give you are fantastic, though unhelpfully they choose to tell you the results of your exam while you're still under the effects so all I can remember is being a room with the Clangers.  Movicol was the stuff they gave me to clear me out the day before and I'm surprised SBT doesn't mention the best part of that experience, when the acid in your stomach juices starts burning the skin off not just your ringpiece but the arse cheeks as well.  Horrible, but now at least I can say I've had the endoscope hat-trick of having a camera jammed into my stomach, urethra and bowels - in that order, thankfully.  Never go ass to mouth!

Also Blue Balls, which I can confirm is a real thing.  A really, really painful thing which felt like a pained meatball-sized lump in my left knacker for about a day that's left me with a limp even after the meatball in question disappeared suddenly, prompting my GP's professional opinion of "just one of them things."
I am considering if it is worth seeking a second opinion.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 31 July, 2012, 07:06:28 PM
Ooh, movelat didnt do that to me. I hope you mentioned that to the doctors, as it sounds like you may have a very sensitive anus- which may explain why we never see you at commando forces' organised get-togethers, winky winky.

Hope all better now though- it ain't pleasant, that's for sure.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 31 July, 2012, 07:35:10 PM
He has an open invitation any time  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 31 July, 2012, 07:57:54 PM
Edinburgh Fringe, nuff said
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 July, 2012, 11:18:53 PM
Extracted from the attic and plugged in my very old (bought 1997, last used 2003) PC today to try to find some old files which seem to have vanished from my backup disks.  Very loud bang, lots of smoke, totally dead.  Ehh?  Investigating I found a teeny tiny red switch on the back which I had never noticed before.  It was set to '115'.  The other setting was '230'.  Yes, you guessed it, my PC had a switch to allow it work on the US domestic power supply without an external transformer.  A switch that was obviously capable of being flicked accidentally at some point in its journey to or from the attic.  This is the stupidest piece of design I have ever encountered, and my country has trains where you have to lean out of the window to open the door because they only have handles on the outside.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 03 August, 2012, 08:41:40 PM
To found out my year work contract ended last Tuesday, didn't get paid month wage too! Been work for free there!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 04 August, 2012, 06:56:26 PM
I have only just discovered the forum's back online, and apparently has been for days.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 04 August, 2012, 07:33:08 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 03 August, 2012, 08:41:40 PM
To found out my year work contract ended last Tuesday, didn't get paid month wage too! Been work for free there!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wlw_v6v4O4 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wlw_v6v4O4)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 04 August, 2012, 07:54:42 PM
Because ive just spent the best part of three hours waiting for and then watching the most insipid and pathetic carnival in carnival history. Again, it was full of boring bloody pirates- because that's all our town can bloody do these days- meaning lots of overweight drunks in fake dreadlocks, eyeliner and plastic earrings shouting 'arrr' and seeing it as an excuse to 'act badly'. They are all wankers, and i loath the lot of them. The highlight was a majorette display team that looked like someone had taken the berserkers from clive barker's nightbreed, stuffed them into jumpers, and given them pompoms. Their utter lack of enthusiasm had my wife and i in stitches.
I am now watching bugs bunny on dvd, while waiting for the firework display to start.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 05 August, 2012, 11:03:45 PM
Broke my big toe on holiday. Its in a cast, for a toe. Ah well at least I can look foreward to 6 weeks of work.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 10 August, 2012, 11:49:19 PM
I just accidentally made a triple-decker peanut butter and Branston pickle butty. The branston and the raspberry jam were in very similar-shaped jars in the fridge. And I'm drunk.

If anyone out there thinks this may actually work - no. It doesn't  :sick:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 11 August, 2012, 12:14:28 AM
To be fair, it couldn't have been much worse than what you were trying to make in the first place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 August, 2012, 12:54:10 AM
Fie on you. Version 2.0 was delicious.  : PB + J ROX! (http://www.collegehumor.com/video/40471/pbj-on-family-guy)
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 11 August, 2012, 11:47:11 AM
I climbed up Snowdon yesterday and now my legs don't work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 11 August, 2012, 12:01:32 PM
Will one of those timewasting bastards please BUY MY FUCKING CAR?

Frustrating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 August, 2012, 11:35:44 PM
We got home from a week away this evening and realised that before we left we forgot to start the dishwasher up which was full of dirty pots and pans.

Combined with the liquefied lemon in the fruit bowl, the house now smells like a compost heap.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 15 August, 2012, 10:34:38 PM
My daughter trod fully on my broken toe today. Fucking ouch.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 20 August, 2012, 08:32:30 AM
Mrs Tips has gone to work and taken MY front door keys locking me in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: W. R. Logan on 20 August, 2012, 09:14:46 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 20 August, 2012, 08:32:30 AM
Mrs Tips has gone to work and taken MY front door keys locking me in.

So you're locked in with no one but Kelly for company 8-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 20 August, 2012, 10:38:44 AM
Tried buying jeans in the high street lately? Are we all supposed to have legs like Judge Death to get into them?

Sssspraaaay on ssstretch ssskinny jeansssssss my arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 20 August, 2012, 12:56:47 PM
Over the last few days, I've developed a large lump in the side of my neck. It's not especially painful, but slightly tender to the touch. Off to the doc's later this afternoon to get it checked out. Of course, this will mean I owe work two hours...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 20 August, 2012, 03:36:26 PM
Fingers crossed that its just a big zit or something.

I just went back to work today after a two week break. Work has been a bit stressful of late so I took the decision to switch off my work phone, laptop and Ipad for the duration.

I switched it all back on this morning and work hadn't even tried bothering me but I did miss a text offering me an extra ticket to go and see the new batman film on Imax and another inviting me to a party.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 20 August, 2012, 04:01:33 PM
Theory is it's a swollen gland. Question is, why?
Blood tests will ensue - booked in for Wednesday morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 24 August, 2012, 02:01:49 PM
There's lymph gland round about there. Mine swells up all the time when fighting minor infections - always when I get a cold. They are probably just being careful if yours has swollen especially large.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 24 August, 2012, 06:23:54 PM
Grin and bear it, Noisybast - I've had that happen as well. I'm sure it'll be nothing to worry about.

Meantime, I had to sacrifice a big chunk of my day to compose a letter of complaint to a convention organiser about the behaviour of one of his underlings.

I HATE doing this sort of thing, but I feel it's necessary. Said underling has been abusing his position in attempts to secure pro work in comics - an aim which has also seen him resort to telling outright lies and treading all over other hopefuls to get where he wants to be.

The situation makes my blood boil, but I wouldn't be posting this unless I was fairly certain his goose was finally cooked. He's got away with this behaviour for a few years, but not any more.

I just hate that it's taking up my time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: WhitBloke on 25 August, 2012, 08:28:30 AM
Just got myself feeling really settled in the new WhitCave, got everything either how I like it or how I can put up with it until I can be bothered to change it, say, after the Olympics... yes, the next Olympics, knowing me... even finally treated myself to a very pleasing vintage ring-dial wall-hanging telephone with the most beautiful old black GPO sheen... the WhitPhone, if you will... private number, just for close friends and family, nobody else, certainly not work, ever... oh, and Commissioner Gordon when I become a billionaire vigilante... and now the damn thing's going off every sodding night at times like 2.30, 4.30, 5.45 thanks to a series of different-each-night robo-numbers seemingly way up in bastard Leicester.  (Actually, I've got nothing against Leicester per se; great bookshop, genial tramps as I recall, but been some years and they might be closed and dead.)
I 1471 the buggers and all I get is some ringing and beeping.  Wrong numbers I can handle.  Prank callers can at least be immediately called inventively vicious names.  This isn't even cold calling crap.  This is something else.  Nobody I don't love had this number.  It's a faceless auto-telephonic night-siege and you wouldn't believe how irritable it's leaving me as a res... 

...shit...

Just realised... on top of realising it's left me more irritable than capable of the simplest waking thought...  I'm taking it off the hook when I go to bed and trusting the mobile for whatever the next legitimate emergency is.  And solution or not, that's irritating, too.  And so will the undoubtedly bureaucrapic process of finding some way of stopping all this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 August, 2012, 08:52:26 AM
sign up your number to the Telephone Prefernce Service - this should mean that you don't get cold-callers. Doesn't always work, and there's nothing to stop companies ringing you if the number's in the phone book, but it should cut down the calls. And if any do get through, just mention the TPS and they hang up pretty quickly. Or if it's the same number, get BT to block it (but there's a fee for this)

I'm getting plagued by "claiming for mis-sold PPI" calls on both my landline and mobile at the moment. One of the chaps was very helpful though, saying I should only be on his list if I'd taken a mortgage, loan or credit card which I've never done. I think I'd better do a credit check to see if anyone's using my details.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: WhitBloke on 25 August, 2012, 10:24:26 AM
You diamond!  Sounds just the ticket, Dandontdare.  I'd forgotten that TPS thing.  Thanks.  Oh, and best of swift luck with sorting your own handset hardships.  I know a little of how the "Listen, please, for the last time: I've never wanted a loan, that's why I've never taken one or should be claiming PPI, so now it's loud swearing time, right in that poncy little headset of yours!" routine plays out.  Stupid me, I guess the TPS for this new line just hadn't occurred.  Must be the lack of sleep.  (Well, that's my excuse...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 25 August, 2012, 10:56:38 AM
I'm on my way to a wedding, it's for friends of my girlfriend, and while they're nice people, en masse they can be a nightmare.

I only know a handful of people that are going, and even then they'll only be lucid for an hour or two before everything inevitably spirals put of control.

I'm heading straight for the booze.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 25 August, 2012, 06:54:26 PM
Quote from: WhitBloke on 25 August, 2012, 08:28:30 AM
... all I get is some ringing and beeping.

Actually, I'm not sure TPS will help.

If it's just beeps it's likely a fax or modem at the other end.  Somebody thinks your number is also a machine.  Probably an embedded data reporting system, if the calls are at the same time each night.

In that case your only solution is to get the phone company to track the source.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 August, 2012, 08:23:56 PM
a lot of cold-calling companies will use auto-diallers that call, say 100 number simultaneously. They may only have 20 operators, so if 30 calls are answered, 10 will just hear a beep and then silence. I complained to BT once cos I thought I had a 'silent-caller' stalker, but they said it was almost certainly this. Joined the TPS on their advice and they stopped.

Can't get rid of these PPI drokkers though!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 26 August, 2012, 11:33:14 AM
If the beepins is continuous then that does soun d like some kind of fax or data link. The telephone company might be able to do a trace and block.

If it's one beep then silent that's the auto-dialler for the cold calling companies. It's illegal in this country (some companies ignore) but not in forrin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 02 September, 2012, 10:24:04 PM
Check up on my broken big toe tomorrow. TBH I don't think it has healed. Already had 6 weeks off Stat sick pay, I don't mind being off work as it coincided with the kids being off school but such a shit weekly pay out is a bit of a downer.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 05 September, 2012, 02:44:47 AM
Stuck at work on a night shift for at least another 6 hours and both stalls in the gents look like somebody locked a doubly incontinent zoo animal in them all day and I'm touching cloth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 05 September, 2012, 11:16:20 PM
"Read the all-oo-min-um sign."

"Aluminium. It's got a 'u' in it."

Excuse me, am i going mad? Surely the 'problem' with american pronunciation of 'aluminium' isnt that it's missing the 'u', but that it's missing the second 'i'?

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 06 September, 2012, 10:41:57 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 05 September, 2012, 11:16:20 PM
"Read the all-oo-min-um sign."
"Aluminium. It's got a 'u' in it."
Excuse me, am i going mad? Surely the 'problem' with american pronunciation of 'aluminium' isnt that it's missing the 'u', but that it's missing the second 'i'?

If I understand correctly, it's we Brits who get it wrong.  Apparently it was originally 'aluminum' without a second 'i'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 06 September, 2012, 10:55:49 PM
Yeah- but the advert still makes no sense, does it? I'm genuinely tying myself in knots over this- and it's hurting my head. Of course, if you've not seen the ad, you won't know what I'm talking about...

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 06 September, 2012, 11:34:45 PM
It might surprise you to learn that the people who write adverts are lazy hacks
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 September, 2012, 09:52:26 AM
I have just lost 5 hours of my life to a pile of digital excrement called Games for Windows Live.

My god, this is the worst piece of software ever, it offers no tangible benefit to PC gamers, it has no good reason to exist and probably wouldn't if it had to stand on it's own feet instead of being forced on users as a compulsory install with certain games.

I won't go into the details of all of the hoops I had to jump through to get it working but my particular highlights were the installer that quits before the install is complete without telling you why (and then requires you to manually edit your registry and delete files to get it to work) and the account creation process that tries to force you into using internet explorer and then won't actually work with it.

This is all to sign up to a Microsoft service using Microsoft software running on a Microsoft OS.

All I wanted to do was activate the DLC I bought for Batman - Arkham City, no wonder people pirate so much stuff if companies make it this difficult for legitimate customers to access content they actually paid for.

I won't touch another game infected with this crap.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWFglztLeDc (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWFglztLeDc)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 08 September, 2012, 07:42:42 PM
Because for reasons already discussed elsewhere I am moving on from the prog and shall no longer be signing in here.

Farewell to all the great people I have met here over the past 11 years, it's been fun.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 08 September, 2012, 09:43:01 PM
No offence, old bean, but you're taking it way too personally. The unfortunate machinations of the film's distribution in terms of your regretable circumstances, should in no way affect your love for the Prog. Will be sad to see you leave, so please don't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 08 September, 2012, 09:45:19 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 08 September, 2012, 07:42:42 PM
Because for reasons already discussed elsewhere I am moving on from the prog and shall no longer be signing in here.

Farewell to all the great people I have met here over the past 11 years, it's been fun.

At the risk of being offensive, please just grow up.  You've ignored every positive suggestion offered by forum members.

Just butcher two pairs of 3D glasses and put a right eye lens on both eyes.  You will see a monoscopic image -- exactly the same one that audiences watching the 2D version in other cinemas will see.  Even the light levels should be about right, because they use a brighter image for 3D to compensate for the clockwise & anti-clockwise polarisation of the glasses.

Better still, why not start up a business selling ready-built 3D-to-2D movie glasses to help others like yourself, rather than just hitting out illogically at Rebellion.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 08 September, 2012, 09:49:28 PM
(Cough)

http://www.2d-glasses.com/ (http://www.2d-glasses.com/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 08 September, 2012, 10:01:21 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 08 September, 2012, 09:45:19 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 08 September, 2012, 07:42:42 PM
Because for reasons already discussed elsewhere I am moving on from the prog and shall no longer be signing in here.

Farewell to all the great people I have met here over the past 11 years, it's been fun.

At the risk of being offensive, please just grow up.  You've ignored every positive suggestion offered by forum members.

Just butcher two pairs of 3D glasses and put a right eye lens on both eyes.  You will see a monoscopic image -- exactly the same one that audiences watching the 2D version in other cinemas will see.  Even the light levels should be about right, because they use a brighter image for 3D to compensate for the clockwise & anti-clockwise polarisation of the glasses.

Better still, why not start up a business selling ready-built 3D-to-2D movie glasses to help others like yourself, rather than just hitting out illogically at Rebellion.

I haven't ignored the positives, I've responded to a few so apologies if I missed yours.

The glasses are a good idea thought obviously you lose some brightness and clarity from the real image.

And telling a 41 year old who's slowly going blind and upset at this decision to grow up because of those feelings is a little off to be honest.  I'm perfectly grown up.  I consider excluding a bunch of people when they really had no need to pretty bloody immature and it has upset me.

Anyway, enough said.  Your idea is interesting and I will see if this works for me and my particular functional problems but I will wait until I can watch a friends 3d telly and tr it free.  Not pay and reward someone for pushing a format like this.

But I was saying goodbye to the folks here that I've chatted to over many years, some of which I used to chat to loads and it's them it's addressed to.  I've said enough about the other issue elsewhere?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 08 September, 2012, 10:16:09 PM
I understand your anger, but, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 08 September, 2012, 10:26:41 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 08 September, 2012, 07:42:42 PM
Because for reasons already discussed elsewhere I am moving on from the prog and shall no longer be signing in here.

And now you're into "I'm going now. Don't try to stop me. No, really, I'm going. Forever. Really." territory.

I'm honestly sorry you're upset. I'm sorry you have these truly horrible sight problems, but neither this forum nor the comic has done anything to earn your ire, so write a stiff letter to the film's distributor and take the right  people to task. Or, y'know, stop telling everyone that you're leaving and go.

Bah.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 09 September, 2012, 04:11:45 PM
I'm not very good at DREDD vs. ZOMBIES.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 11 September, 2012, 07:44:38 PM
If my two visits to Dredd are anything to go by, we're going to have to watch that fucking Sweeney/Orange advert every time we visit the cinema for the next few months. The Expendables one was mildly amusing the first couple of times, but this got on my tits from the very first frame.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 11 September, 2012, 08:29:19 PM
After six weeks off work on the sick, today was first day back. God I hate work.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 12 September, 2012, 02:01:50 PM
Is it just me, or are any other boarders utterly pissed off with all those poxy automated telephone lines that seem to be ubiquitous in just about every area of life these days?

A perfect example is the one for the Odeon Cinema in Point Village, Dublin. I've tried three times now to make my way through their 1520880000 number and I can't even get to the point of hearing details for the Dredd 3D movie. Instead, I keep getting the same robotic cunt's voice repeating: "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you correctly. Was that..?" etc, et fucking cetera!

Now just to clarify things: I don't have any sort of speech impediment; I wasn't speaking in Swahili; I wasn't lorrying back a pint of ale while speaking at the same, nor for that matter, gobbling on a giant size bread roll.

I'm not asking for much, really. I'd just like to speak to a human fucking being who can answer a few simple questions such as: "At what time is it on in the Biggest Screen in the cinema?"; "As I don't have a credit card to book online, are there still tickets available for the screening if I just walk in off the street, as it were?" "Will I be able to choose any seat?"; "What time does the actual movie itself, start at?"

But no, instead I keep getting the run-around from the Irish equivalent of Hal 9000.

Stop Press!

Finally got through on my fourth attempt, but once again have found myself in Automato-land! No facility to speak to someone who can deal with my queries. Just the same shite as before.

End result - they've just lost a potential customer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: johnnystress on 12 September, 2012, 02:05:25 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 12 September, 2012, 02:01:50 PM

Now just to clarify things: I don't have any sort of speech impediment; I wasn't speaking in Swahili; I wasn't lorrying back a pint of ale while speaking at the same, nor for that matter, gobbling on a giant size bread roll.


;)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FFRoYhTJQQ
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 September, 2012, 02:55:17 PM
If the cinema is in a mall or leisure complex at all, try to find the management number for that. I lost my wallet in the cinema a while back and couldnopt find a direct number to call them and speak to a human. Eventually, I found the emergency number for the Printworks compolex, the duty manager there gave me a contact number for the cinema manager, who found my wallet and left it to be collected
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 12 September, 2012, 09:01:25 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 12 September, 2012, 02:01:50 PM
Is it just me, or are any other boarders utterly pissed off with all those poxy automated telephone lines that seem to be ubiquitous in just about every area of life these days?

I got a text from a debt collection company yesterday asking me to call them.

I got a bit paranoid on my way home second-guessing myself as to whether or not I'd made the latest payment. I couldn't quite remember, but on checking my records and my bank balance, it seemed I had.  Fair enough, they weren't calling for that reason then.

I decided to call them today anyway if only to tell them "My circumstances haven't changed so I won't be increasing payments, but of course I'll continue the amount agreed last time."

I got one of those automated replies followed by some (to be fair pleasant) classical music. They left me waiting for quite a while, then I thought, what am I doing? They want me to call them? If they really want to contact me, why can't they call me?

Anyway I put the phone down after that. To be fair I wasn't really annoyed, just a bit bemused. I didn't really want to speak with them anyway, but it was a bit irritating asI don't want them accusing me of being uncooperative and taking action after all.  I'll probably give it another go tomorrow, but if they keep me waiting I'll hang up. Phone calls cost money too after all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 13 September, 2012, 01:28:50 PM
Phone calls to those manky s.o.bs often costs quite a lot. I hope they aren't hassling you. Often they require being told off by someone from CAB or the credit counselling service to stop as it's illegal but they don't give a rat's arse. I am so glad I have finished paying off my debts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 13 September, 2012, 04:42:20 PM
So there i was, on my way home from work, trying to pick up a Beano for my son. Different series of newsagents to my usuals- four of them. No Beano in any of them. 2000AD and the meg in two. In the fourth i was told quite categorically by some in-her-20s know-it-all that the beano had been cancelled and "all they do is beano max". Naturally, i said otherwise, causing her to become quite irate and to claim that 'the comic man told me last week'. I then asked her, for a laugh about the prog and the judge dredd megazine and she said- and i fucking quote this verbatim- "the comic man told us we arent allowed to sell that because it was banned."

There's only so much knowledge about british comics you can display to a fucktard girl in a shop before she calls the police i reckon, so i left. Im on my way to the newsie round the corner from my house now, to hopefully pick up a beano- but id advise you to put your progs away lads, in case the 'comic man' catches you.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 13 September, 2012, 04:53:26 PM
I've now got a mental image of five or six thrillsuckers stood on each other's shoulders, inside a long trenchcoat with a slouch hat on, soberly telling the checkout girl, 'Hello. I am... er, 'the comic man', and I'm here to inform you the prog has been banned and must not be sold.'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 September, 2012, 05:14:06 PM
Cool. Banning them just makes them that much more valuable and 'leet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 18 September, 2012, 07:37:12 PM
Because this morning i had to turn down two shifts as they were too far away for me to get to, which depressed me somewhat. I did joke though that -haha- im sure they'll phone back this evening and book me a twelve hour waking night somewhere ive never been before, haha oh my sides.

Yes, well. Im now working from 9pm tonight to 9am in a home that ive never so much as stepped inside. I know nothing about the service users; or even how many there are. But needs must...

I'll be hereabouts all night though, id imagine, trying to stay awake!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 21 September, 2012, 12:33:01 AM
I was handed an All Ireland Ticket for the football final this Sunday, hens teeth and all that, and I had to say no. Just couldnt afford it, not the ticket, but the whole day out and associated expences  :(

On a brighter note we booked a babysitter, so win, lose, or draw, I'm in a pub on Sunday night :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 September, 2012, 11:22:58 AM
You do know that there are currently about a squillion Mayo and Donegal GAA fans who would gladly swim through blood, eat their own entrails and lick battery acid from your boots if it meant getting their mitts on an All-Ireland ticket? Not to mention a certain 2000AD forum member, < cough, cough, ahem! > !

Cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 21 September, 2012, 12:26:32 PM
My Brother snapped it up!  Its mental here(Mayo) all talk of the weather, recession,house prices has been replaced with, Have ya a ticket!  My fater-in-law flew in from Seattle yesterday for the feicin match!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 26 September, 2012, 12:27:50 PM
BAH! The calculator I've owned since I was fifteen has finally given up the ghost. The ones one my phone and laptop are bleedin' useless at scientific notation. Now I have to learn how to use one of these new fangled ones.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 26 September, 2012, 01:13:12 PM
Quote from: pops1983 on 26 September, 2012, 12:27:50 PM
BAH! The calculator I've owned since I was fifteen has finally given up the ghost. The ones one my phone and laptop are bleedin' useless at scientific notation. Now I have to learn how to use one of these new fangled ones.

I bet eBay would replace your old one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 September, 2012, 01:18:27 PM
I had a day off yesterday and was expecting the postie to bring me this week's (late) prog, plus  Complete Nemesis vol1 and a Pertwee Dr Who DVD, both of which Ebay tells me have been dispatched.

All that came through the letterbox to keep me amused during a truly sodden day was a snarky note from the housing association telling me to move some stuff off the landing, and my New Internationalist (which I barely even flick through nowadays, I just haven't the heart to cancel my sub).

very disappointing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 26 September, 2012, 01:46:58 PM
Quote from: Trout on 26 September, 2012, 01:13:12 PM
Quote from: pops1983 on 26 September, 2012, 12:27:50 PM
BAH! The calculator I've owned since I was fifteen has finally given up the ghost. The ones one my phone and laptop are bleedin' useless at scientific notation. Now I have to learn how to use one of these new fangled ones.

I bet eBay would replace your old one.

Good call Mr.Trout, thanks
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 28 September, 2012, 03:29:47 PM
Had to replace my broken down mobile phone. Replaced it with a cheap secondhand model but all of my contacts were somehow deleted. Now having to send people various messages through email or Facebook chasing their numbers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 28 September, 2012, 03:35:18 PM
Can't really get used to the single life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 28 September, 2012, 07:41:04 PM
One of my day job clients - unsurprisingly - is being a complete prick.

She owes me for two lots of fees, which I've told her I'll come and collect from her. Each time I call, she claims to have no money, and tells me 'call back on Friday'.

So, this being FRIDAY, I went to collect from her. 'Oh, I meant the Friday after next,' she says.

BOLLOCKS YOU DID! I was listening VERY intently to what you told me, and you simply don't want to pay me! Furthermore, you STUPID COW, * I * decide when I'll come and collect money from you, and you'll DAMN WELL HAVE IT READY! That's how it works when you pay somebody for their services - we do the job, and we get paid.

For the amount of money involved, this is - as you can tell - REALLY frustrating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 28 September, 2012, 10:06:48 PM
HDE. If it is possible try and reverse the work you have done, she will soon pay up. My uncle is a landscaper and when customers drag their heels over payment he tells them he will rip out all work he has done. Works every time.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 29 September, 2012, 12:12:53 AM
Glad you can see it as a minor impediment Richmond-per ardva ad astra!

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2012, 08:39:19 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 29 September, 2012, 12:12:53 AM
Glad you can see it as a minor impediment Richmond-per ardva ad astra!

M

Yeah - apart from the cold dark hole where my heart used to be, and the total loss of trust in anyone ever, it's all good!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Large48 on 29 September, 2012, 08:40:26 PM
Wanted to try and get to Brighton to see a certain show (SBT knows what I mean) but that went out of the windows......... :(

Rich time to buy a new shirt!  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2012, 08:44:07 PM
QuoteRich time to buy a new shirt! 

I'm on it, man!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 29 September, 2012, 09:31:20 PM
Aaah, Rich - say it ain't so...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2012, 09:34:38 PM
Quote from: Banners on 29 September, 2012, 09:31:20 PM
Aaah, Rich - say it ain't so...?

'Fraid so...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 29 September, 2012, 10:31:44 PM
Keep 'er lit fella. I'm sure that's little comfort but my heart goes out to you.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 September, 2012, 10:33:00 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 29 September, 2012, 10:31:44 PM
I'm sure that's little comfort but my heart goes out to you.

What Mikey said.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2012, 10:48:59 PM
Thanks, guys.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 30 September, 2012, 05:21:47 PM
I've nothing further to add to what folks have said, Rich, so...

[Slides a beer down the bar.]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 30 September, 2012, 07:09:54 PM
Fucking fuckitty fuck, Rich. I mean, fuck. Like everyone else, I got nothing to offer that's going to help, but I'm here in the unlikely event that you think of anything I can do that will...

Fuck.

Jim

(Did I say "fuck"?)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Kerrin on 30 September, 2012, 07:32:16 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2012, 09:34:38 PM
Quote from: Banners on 29 September, 2012, 09:31:20 PM
Aaah, Rich - say it ain't so...?

'Fraid so...

Shit. Really sorry to hear that Rich.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 03 October, 2012, 08:54:45 AM
Thanks guys.
Seriously - it means a lot!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 October, 2012, 08:04:06 PM
My sympathies, Rich.
___

Last weekend in a bar some moron had some sort of macho man delusion that was going to bully me. First time I let it go. Soon after he continued, so very nearly degenerated into argy bargy. Very, ahem, 'colourful' language from me, raised hand which trapped his, more colourful language from this poster and moron was on his way with tail between legs.

Why oh why do some people think they can just choose someone at random and play tough? Not nice having to rear up like that. So unnecessary.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 03 October, 2012, 09:31:06 PM
Quote from: Kerrin on 30 September, 2012, 07:32:16 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 September, 2012, 09:34:38 PM
Quote from: Banners on 29 September, 2012, 09:31:20 PM
Aaah, Rich - say it ain't so...?

'Fraid so...

Shit. Really sorry to hear that Rich.

Gutted for you Rich
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 04 October, 2012, 09:04:49 PM
I was out walking the dog and passed a gang of four scumbag teenagers acting the maggot, one of whom tried to swing a small kick at the dog while passing. I stopped, turned around and confronted them, three of them legged it up the street and the fourth (the smallest one) was saying "It wasn't me who tried to kick the dog, like". 

Par for the course living in Ireland, unfortunately.

The local paper today also reported a black swan that moved into the area recently was found dead with rope tied around it's neck, scumbags tried to kill it last year with pellet guns, what is it people having to hurt animals for kicks?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 04 October, 2012, 10:09:15 PM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 04 October, 2012, 09:04:49 PM
I was out walking the dog and passed a gang of four scumbag teenagers acting the maggot, one of whom tried to swing a small kick at the dog while passing. I stopped, turned around and confronted them, three of them legged it up the street and the fourth (the smallest one) was saying "It wasn't me who tried to kick the dog, like". 

Par for the course living in Ireland, unfortunately.

The local paper today also reported a black swan that moved into the area recently was found dead with rope tied around it's neck, scumbags tried to kill it last year with pellet guns, what is it people having to hurt animals for kicks?

Don't even try to get your head around it man, little scrotes like that don't even live in the same version of reality as you do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 October, 2012, 04:28:44 PM
Commiserations, Rich - hope you're okay.

--

Star Wars Angry Birds.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 October, 2012, 04:33:08 PM
I'm now deeply engaged in the first stage of penance for my past misdeeds and omissions, and slowly beginning to feel out the scale of the pit I've dug for myself.  Bloody hell, I can't even see the walls, never mind the sky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 06 October, 2012, 12:31:41 PM
Sorry to hear that, Tordel. Can only hope that things work out for you and I wish you the best with whatever it is you're going through. Cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DrJomster on 07 October, 2012, 09:29:35 AM
Hang on in there all you good people!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 08 October, 2012, 10:29:27 PM
Even though I find it utterly bewildering (and now rather circular) I can't stop myself from clicking on the "Dredd box office" thread every time it lurches to the top. Is this what X Man forums have been like for the last fifteen years?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 October, 2012, 10:33:45 PM
I hear ya, McCosh, my relationship with that thread is like picking at a scab.  Made all the more odd since I'm ignoring a significant portion of the posters!

Oh and don't mind me, paddykafka, I'm just slowly coming to terms with the distance I still have to go just to get back to Square One.  'S only a very minor impediment in the scheme of things, and journeys bring their own rewards.

More to the point: Aaargh, it's still Monday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 12 October, 2012, 10:07:36 PM
Glad to hear you're taking the philosophical approach to your problems, Tordelback. that will see you through it, I have no doubt.

Myself, I've had a real stinker today. A really annoying, needlessly frustrating day. The sort that makes you get in the front door and say 'Eh. The human race can go screw itself.'

I DID score a Judge Dredd coffee mug, though!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 13 October, 2012, 07:11:04 PM
Fook me, replacement laptop batteries are expensive, arent they.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 13 October, 2012, 09:11:06 PM
Saturday eve torture tv. That God forsaken dancing programme and then X-factor. Always better tv on week days - documentaries and stuff. 'Spose I could get on with massive backlog of drawing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 13 October, 2012, 09:22:02 PM

Quote from: SuperSurfer on 13 October, 2012, 09:11:06 PM
Saturday eve torture tv.

Thank Grud for the various i-players.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 13 October, 2012, 09:25:03 PM
Saturday night tv is designed to make creative types cringe ans wonder what happened to scripts,actors direction etc etc.
After 7pm BBC/ITV have decided that programming should involve the hasbeens, neverweres and never will bes.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 13 October, 2012, 10:07:26 PM
Quote from: Emp on 13 October, 2012, 09:25:03 PM
Saturday night tv is designed to make creative types cringe ans wonder what happened to scripts,actors direction etc etc. After 7pm BBC/ITV have decided that programming should involve the hasbeens, neverweres and never will bes.

You just missed The Thick Of It on BBC2. It'll be on iplayer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 October, 2012, 11:31:17 PM
Quote from: HdE on 13 October, 2012, 11:09:24 PM
This is NOT how we do things in comics, kids!

Rampant egotism and over-inflated sense of self importance leads to ill-will, bad feeling and recriminations? I think you'll find that's EXACTLY how we do things in comics! :-)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 October, 2012, 10:45:32 AM
If you think that's bad, try the Stand Up Comedy circuit.

I like Strictly - you actually see people genuinely learning stuff and the good dancers are a genuine joy to behold- no autotune going on there. And the professional dancing girls and boys are works of art.

Plus we also get kicks out of Merlin in the Tips household. So Saturday night TV not too bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Gonk on 14 October, 2012, 12:04:48 PM

It hurts when I laugh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: strontium71 on 14 October, 2012, 12:48:10 PM
Don't laugh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 14 October, 2012, 12:59:26 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 13 October, 2012, 11:31:17 PM
Rampant egotism and over-inflated sense of self importance leads to ill-will, bad feeling and recriminations? I think you'll find that's EXACTLY how we do things in comics! :-)

Quote from: Tiplodocus on 14 October, 2012, 10:45:32 AM
If you think that's bad, try the Stand Up Comedy circuit.

...and in archaeology!! People are like that wherever you go - especially where it involves competition. I say try and focus on collaborators who have served y'well - I HAVE A LIST.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 14 October, 2012, 05:28:41 PM
QuoteWhat sort of galls me in this case is that the guys making trouble are - to be blunt - nobodies.

This is, sadly, usual.
You'll find it is always the newbies who have not learned to say "I will never altar my artistic vision and change the script I have submitted as per the editor's requests, even though you are actually the one paying to have it printed."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 14 October, 2012, 09:21:49 PM
None of the breakdown services I apparently have included home breakdowns (or breakdowns outside of the Netherlands) so I ended up being shafted by the AA..

Because of a fucking interior light being left on..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 October, 2012, 09:25:37 PM
I could only ever do two impressions; Jimmy Saville and Frank Spencer. Knowing my luck, next they'll discover that Michael  Crawford is a member of Al Qaeeda
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 15 October, 2012, 11:21:23 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 14 October, 2012, 09:25:37 PM
I could only ever do two impressions; Jimmy Saville and Frank Spencer. Knowing my luck, next they'll discover that Michael  Crawford is a member of Al Qaeeda

"Ooh, Betty!  Dog's just done a whoopsie all over the Improvised Explosive Device!  Infidel!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 October, 2012, 04:50:37 PM
I am going to track down and strangle whoever it was that invented hold music.

Having just been forced to listen to the same song 7 times in a row while on hold to Eon, I'm genuinely now wondering if companies deliberately misuse it to get you to hang up.

I have a bit of a problem with music, meaning that thanks to my overactive brain, songs get firmly lodged in my head very easily, and subsequently drive me absolutely fucking mental when I'm trying to get to sleep at night.

I had a similar experience when trying to get through to another company recently, and had to endure the same 10-second snippets of the same three or four songs over and over and over and over and over for 25 minutes (one of which was 'She's So Lovely' by Scouting for Girls - officially one of the shittest, most grindingly irritating songs ever written. Surely only some sort of fucking sadist could devise that system? Seriously, at least have something subtle and nondescript, like muzak or a quiet classical piece. I actually lost my temper and ended up having a bit of a go at the poor bloke who eventually picked up the phone about it, to my shame.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 16 October, 2012, 08:40:44 PM
I foolishly let Mrs Tips do the shopping last weekend and she bought tins of whole plum tomatoes rather than chopped tomatoes.  Cue frantic attempt to chop them very carefully in the non-stick pan.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 16 October, 2012, 08:43:41 PM
Use a wooden spoon to chop them and give them about 15 minutes longer to cook down. You'll be all right.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 18 October, 2012, 02:40:36 PM
Just got a spot of ink on my shirt front at work and no tie to cover it. I look like an almight plank. (Well at least more so).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 18 October, 2012, 02:58:10 PM
Quote from: Judge von Boom on 18 October, 2012, 02:40:36 PM
Just got a spot of ink on my shirt front at work and no tie to cover it. I look like an almight plank. (Well at least more so).
Shouldn't have let Lee wank on it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 18 October, 2012, 03:44:47 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 18 October, 2012, 02:58:10 PM
Quote from: Judge von Boom on 18 October, 2012, 02:40:36 PM
Just got a spot of ink on my shirt front at work and no tie to cover it.
Shouldn't have let Lee wank on it.

I'm not wearing a tie either - at first I thought this was because I'm working from home. Now I know who to really blame. Where can I send Lee my bill?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 18 October, 2012, 04:47:50 PM
Lee's wanking powers are prodigious indeed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 October, 2012, 05:05:28 PM
it's the steam powered gauntlet of course!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 19 October, 2012, 06:22:16 AM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 18 October, 2012, 03:44:47 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 18 October, 2012, 02:58:10 PM
Quote from: Judge von Boom on 18 October, 2012, 02:40:36 PM
Just got a spot of ink on my shirt front at work and no tie to cover it.
Shouldn't have let Lee wank on it.
I'm not wearing a tie either - at first I thought this was because I'm working from home. Now I know who to really blame. Where can I send Lee my bill?

Careful now!  If he pays up then, legally, you become his pimp.

It's, like, part of the Geneva Convention or something, man.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 19 October, 2012, 03:28:51 PM
Since this thread has become my stand-in for the old 'pet hates' thread, I just wanted to have a rant about people who use Twitter hashtags - specifically meaningless, colloquial or 'jokey' hashtags. And doubly so if you're using them on facebook, or worse still, real conversations.

Quite simply, it makes you look like a smug arsehole (the same way using 'lol' excessively makes you look like a dimwitted teenager), and if an observation isn't clever or funny, putting a #infrontandwritingallthewordswithnospacesbetweenthem doesn't somehow elevate it into being so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 19 October, 2012, 04:18:12 PM
Quote from: radiator on 16 October, 2012, 04:50:37 PM
I am going to track down and strangle whoever it was that invented hold music.

When I phone store support from work I am "treated" to one of three options regarding music:-

1 - A slightly tinny (but still pleasant) CD of classical music,
2 - An operatic version of "Flying without wings", or
3 - Something that sound like it was done by a child on a Rolf Harris Stylophone

This does not improve my customer service skills one bit
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 19 October, 2012, 04:21:31 PM
Quote from: radiator on 19 October, 2012, 03:28:51 PM
Since this thread has become my stand-in for the old 'pet hates' thread, I just wanted to have a rant about people who use Twitter hashtags - specifically meaningless, colloquial or 'jokey' hashtags. And doubly so if you're using them on facebook, or worse still, real conversations.

Quite simply, it makes you look like a smug arsehole (the same way using 'lol' excessively makes you look like a dimwitted teenager), and if an observation isn't clever or funny, putting a #infrontandwritingallthewordswithnospacesbetweenthem doesn't somehow elevate it into being so.

#firstworldproblems
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 19 October, 2012, 04:30:42 PM
Quote from: radiator on 19 October, 2012, 03:28:51 PM
...I just wanted to have a rant about people who use Twitter hashtags - specifically meaningless, colloquial or 'jokey' hashtags. And doubly so if you're using them on facebook, or worse still, real conversations.

Is THAT what those are?!?! Been wondering for ages who started this trend of glib little remarks preceeded by # symbols but they suddenly seemed so bloody ubiquitous I didn't like to ask.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 19 October, 2012, 04:36:29 PM
I also find the phrase 'first world problems' to be smug and a little patronising too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 19 October, 2012, 04:37:44 PM
Quote from: radiator on 19 October, 2012, 04:36:29 PM
I also find the phrase 'first world problems' to be smug and a little patronising too.

There, there. There, there.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 24 October, 2012, 12:36:13 PM
Bloody buggering hell!

Woke up this morning to find both my knees had swollen up like grapefruit - and with the same slightly-squishy-to-the-touch consistency.

Bit concerned, as this is accompanied by a dull ache, and it puts me in mind of the swollen-leg problem I had back in May. Actually starting to think this could be a bit serious now. Although, that said, my knees have deflated a fair bit as the day has worn on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 October, 2012, 03:49:42 PM
Quote from: HdE on 24 October, 2012, 12:36:13 PM
Woke up this morning to find both my knees had swollen up like grapefruit - and with the same slightly-squishy-to-the-touch consistency.

Mind yourself there, HdE - IaNaDr, but sounds akin to the symptoms of thiamine deficiency (aka Beriberi), which is very unlikely unless you like the sauce a lot too much.  However if I'm remembering correctly, the swollen-leg symptom is linked to the cardiovascular effects of thiamine deficiency, so for goodness sakes get it checked out in case it's a similar type of problem from a different cause.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 24 October, 2012, 04:29:19 PM
Am one-hundred percent on that. Doctor's appointment tomorrow.

Weirdly, though, both knees have now deflated to (almost) normal size, and there's no pain whatsoever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 26 October, 2012, 01:51:09 PM
Don't know if it affects any other countries or not, but Apple have increased all App & in-App-purchase prices by appox 15% in ROI.
Bloody rip-off c*nts. The kinda cynical move that drives people to illegally download comics in my opinion...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 26 October, 2012, 07:54:17 PM
Hope all is well HdE. Few years ago I woke up with a phenomenally painful ankle. NHS Indirect said it was a sprain when I knew it wasn't. In one week it swelled up so much I almost felt like I needed to prick the skin to relieve the pressure. So went to the doc much later than I should've. Turned out it was an infection. Obviously not the case with your knees but hope you can get treatment promptly.

After a kickabout footie injury and two decades of martial arts my knees are knackered.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 26 October, 2012, 09:51:51 PM
Cheers for that, Surfer Dude!

As of now, my knees have returned to normal. Doctor thinks it might be a stress related condition (and god alone knows, I've had plenty of that in the last fortnight) but he's also considering the possibility that there's something funky in either my foot or my legs that's precipitating these reactions.

Am scheduled for a blood test, so that should rule out any seriously nasty stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 October, 2012, 11:36:29 PM
I'm having another crisis of confidence but this one seems a bit deeper than most. I'll get over it though - I am at least fairly confident about that. I think.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 October, 2012, 11:46:25 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 30 October, 2012, 11:36:29 PM
I'm having another crisis of confidence but this one seems a bit deeper than most.

Confidence is just another kind of self-delusion, heavens know why the ladies allegedly dig it so. Never had any truck with it myself.  Push on through this crisis to the truth.

Flippancy aside, hope the clouds part by morning.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 October, 2012, 11:49:35 PM
Thanks, Tordels. You are wise and made me smile :)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 01 November, 2012, 08:31:59 PM
Lifting my 3 year old into bed the other night - ouchie.
That will be a hernia then, confirmed with Dr today.

The Hivemind is falling apart.
As we continue to age and deteriorate we should have a dedicated thread for each medical condition.
Bagsy my place in the bad back and slightly senile threads.
I'm only 38  :(
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 02 November, 2012, 10:41:09 AM
Trouble at work.

I work forty miles away from where I live. It takes an average of 1h 15m to get to work in the mornings.
I leave a good margin for error and I'm usually between ten and thirty minutes early for work.

Fairly regularly, something will cause a delay (accidents, bad weather, traffic - the usual) and I'll be slightly late (generally 5 minutes or so). I always stay back to work any time owed. So far, this has seemed a satisfactory arrangement.

Yesterday I was 8 minutes late, and I'm being offered a new, frankly shit, deal. If I can't guarantee to be in for 8am, I get to choose between permanent late shifts or disciplinary action.

As I'm trying my damnedest to find a job in another NHS trust closer to home, I could really do without the threat of disciplinary action hanging over me. It's easy for my manager to say "leave earlier", but a) I'm already setting off at 6:40 and b) if I leave ten minutes earlier, I'll be getting in before 7:30 every day, and I'm willing to bet the little fucker won't be letting me leave early...
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 02 November, 2012, 10:42:29 AM
Oh, and the minor impediment is that I can't find the "Life Spugs" thread...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 November, 2012, 11:14:24 AM
Tell your boss that if she/he doesn't treat your situation with reasonable flexibility that you'll enlist the help of a tribunal, union or soliciter to sue him/her for bullying. If he/she wants guarantees, then he/she must be prepared to pay for it - by providing you with a taxi to work every morning. If he/she is not prepared to do this then the demand of a guarantee is neither serious or reasonable and the current imperfect but workable situation must stand.

We live in a free country, after all, not a dictatorship - and in free countries, sh*t happens on the way to work sometimes. Stand your ground and the Devil take the consequences.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 02 November, 2012, 11:54:31 AM
Yes, that's awful behaviour. You need to request a supervision immediatey expressly about this and put it in the same terms as you did here. Get it logged and noted. do NOT mention you discussed it on an internet message board, or you will be disciplined. Get advice from your union rep and be ready to put in a grievance against this person. Read your companies timekeeping and grievance policies immediately. And good luck!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 12:31:03 PM
Aye, do what SBT said.  Transport inconveniences affect everybody, what with us all being human.  If you are only a matter of minutes late once a month or so, and more regularly early, there is no way that this can be an issue of this magnitude.  There is always an onus on an employer to act in a reasonable manner.

I had to deal with timekeeping issues in my former life as an employer, more than any other single issue in fact since we billed in 15 minute increments, and what I wouldn't have given for an occasional 8 minutes to be worthy of my notice!  Try the lad who was up to an hour late to clients' sites at least once a week - we went through innumerable informal and about 5 formal warnings before he mercifully headed off on his travels.

'Course, we went bust, so YMMV.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 12:42:42 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 12:31:03 PMThere is always an onus on an employer to act in a reasonable manner.
In a moral or humane sense maybe, but legally? I'm not sure. It's hardwired into the DNA of bosses to act unreasonably at least 50% of the time!

Be thankful that in the public sector you have unions and grievance procedures that allow you to challenge this. Where I work (and in the majority of workplaces), I simply have to be at work on time, end of story. It's my responsibility to do so, and if I'm even a minute late, I get a file note, three of those within a certain period and I'm out. "Leave earlier" would be the same advice I would be given (Christ, I need a new job. Life as a battery chicken sucks)

Oh, and I wouldn't bother demanding taxis though, as I think that's a tad unrealistic!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 November, 2012, 01:45:15 PM
The demand for taxis isn't meant to be an actual goal, but a feint. It gives you the opportunity to frame the issue in your own way, puts a chip on the table that you don't mind losing and emphasises the absurdity of the boss' position: "We can't pay for you a taxi, that's unreasonable" - "so are your demands" kind of thing.

It might also be an idea to get your boss to put his/her demands in writing for you to 'refer to in future proceedings' and attach to it the personnel report demonstrating your timekeeping record upon which your boss presumably based these current demands. Make sure to let your boss know that you expect him/her to be acting upon established internal procedures and not acting on a whim. If he/she cannot or will not produce this documentation then mention of something like 'Protection from Harassment Act 1997' might just make this go away.

In special forces parlance; always attack an ambush.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 02:08:00 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 12:42:42 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 12:31:03 PMThere is always an onus on an employer to act in a reasonable manner.
In a moral or humane sense maybe, but legally? I'm not sure.

Can't speak for the Queen's subjects (that's her job after all), but here in the Banana Republic the answer is 'yes' - once you've employed someone for more than a year, you must be able to show that you have taken all reasonable steps to resolve problems prior to undertaking major disciplinary actions or dismissals. 

Going beyond internal best practice in HR (which is where the moral and humane senses should come into play), the problem is always where that legal responsibility is enforced.  Taking an unfair or constructive dismissal case is a colossal pain in the arse, and the first-hand reality of the matter is that people are unwilling to do so because of how long the procedure takes, and what it does to their future employment prospects.  It is very seldom worth it, unless the treatment was really appalling or you have a point you feel compelled to make.

There's also the painful fact that the penalties are relatively minor for a company of any size, and many companies feel it's easier to take the occasional hit rather than have their working practices dictated by legally-mandated decency.  However, you should always pursue all the channels open to you as an employee, in a polite and reasonable matter.  We really aren't battery hens, for all that it is the fervent desire of many employers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 02:19:11 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 02:08:00 PM
once you've employed someone for more than a year, you must be able to show that you have taken all reasonable steps to resolve problems prior to undertaking major disciplinary actions or dismissals. 

I think that the fact they have been flexible up until now and have not disciplined him for previous lateness would count as 'reasonable steps'. I think that unless you can clearly show a direct breach of a specific written rule or agreement, no tribunal or grievance board is going to consider 'being on time' to be an unreasonable demand from an employer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 November, 2012, 02:20:36 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 02:08:00 PM
...always pursue all the channels open to you as an employee, in a polite and reasonable manner.  We really aren't battery hens, for all that it is the fervent desire of many employers.


Hear, hear.

Four rules I try to stick to in arguments like this which may help are:

1: Be impeccable with your words and facts (research is King, brevity is Queen).
2: Don't take it personally (can be the hardest thing to do but vital if you're to keep yourself calm and even).
3: Don't make any assumptions.
4: Always do your best to resolve the issue in question (don't be distracted by side-issues).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 02:44:35 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 02:19:11 PM
I think that the fact they have been flexible up until now and have not disciplined him for previous lateness would count as 'reasonable steps'. I think that unless you can clearly show a direct breach of a specific written rule or agreement, no tribunal or grievance board is going to consider 'being on time' to be an unreasonable demand from an employer.

You're probably entirely correct in this, and while the manner in which things are done is still important, in the unlikely event you ever actually get to the labour courts (or jurisdictional equivalent), it's almost certainly trumped by a good paper-trail of following written protocol.  Even so, keeping good notes and following up all available procedures is equally important for the employee, as is making every effort to arrive on time.  Obviously if your job requires you to be there at a specific time and you can't do that, then no power on earth is going help you.

However, no-one, not even Commando Forces, can guarantee being on time every day for ever, and the aggregate pattern of time-keeping is important.  I've uttered the 'then leave earlier' line myself, and meant it too, but only where the pattern of lateness warranted it.  It was my experience that people who travelled a long way to work, and had complex external commitments, were usually the people whose time-keeping was most impeccable, except for those few occasions when unepected weather, accidents and other impediments screwed them over.  The free-and-easy types who lived just down the road were far more likely to show up 15 minutes late once a week looking a bit rough, and I suspect it's them I reserved most of my attention for.  There's no point screwing over a good employee for minor issues that are beyond their control, unless that's how you get your jollies or make yourself look good.

But then, as I said, the record plainly shows that I was Doing It Wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 02 November, 2012, 02:50:56 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 02:44:35 PM
It was my experience that people who travelled a long way to work, and had complex external commitments, were usually the people whose time-keeping was most impeccable...  The free-and-easy types who lived just down the road were far more likely to show up 15 minutes late once a week looking a bit rough.

This is exactly right. During the first of those bad winters we had, I spent hours - literally hours - struggling through snow to reach work on time and was amazed to be there before people who lived a short walk away. I even heard complaints like "They haven't gritted my street". For 10 days, my entire life outside work amounted to sleeping, shovelling snow and getting to work. I was living off a multipack of crisps on the passenger seat of my car. Sometimes people's sense of entitlement is astonishing.

Anyway: Noisy, you need to get up earlier.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 02:59:27 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 November, 2012, 02:20:36 PM
Four rules I try to stick to in arguments like this which may help are:

1: Be impeccable with your words and facts (research is King, brevity is Queen).
2: Don't take it personally (can be the hardest thing to do but vital if you're to keep yourself calm and even).
3: Don't make any assumptions.
4: Always do your best to resolve the issue in question (don't be distracted by side-issues).

Excellent advice and good rules to live by. I'd add another - RECORD EVERYTHING - Even if it's impractical to do everything in writing, kep a log of conversations and discussions, plus copies of any letters or e-mails. If it ever does come to any kind of hearing, "But he said..."  carries little weight without backup.

And Tordelback -yes, you sound far too sensible and reasonable to be a boss!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 November, 2012, 03:15:09 PM
Yep, RECORD EVERYTHING is excellent advice. I've got into the habit of recording all my conversations with officialdom and such on my phone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JPMaybe on 02 November, 2012, 03:19:33 PM
 Hope things work out for you Noisybast. Definitely only a minor impediment, but today the first thing I had to do was mop up a puddle of radioactive piss. And then again half an hour later because of the same poorly aiming gent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 02 November, 2012, 04:11:46 PM
i work for an nhs trust too and they are becoming more and more arsey about everything!  thank god i had cancer when i did or i'd be time owing them for the op,and every 3-4 hour hospital visit i had every month for after care ... if your staying a bit later to make up the time whats their problem?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 02 November, 2012, 04:26:42 PM
tHE PRICE OF NEW SPECS!! :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 November, 2012, 04:55:56 PM
I was only late for work once and that was when the stupid southerners couldn't drive in the snow a couple of years ago. There are two routes into work, apart from driving along country lanes. One was closed by the police and the other was full of abandoned cars. It was like the retreat from Moscow up Bluebell Hill. I engaged second gear, in my piece of shit and made it into work.
I was one of the few who made it in on nights and was rewarded with a free meal and hot drinks. I then went out and did a delivery but I didn't have to. Going back home was easier, due to mostly being down hill but that has its own dangers.
So out of nearly 30 years of work I was late once and that was because of Southerners.

I prefer to set off 40 mins before my arrival time for a 20 minute journey, as it's my duty to be on time and not my employers.
I'm only saying this as I was mentioned.

I could talk about a bloke who works in my wifes place in the NHS, who is late every other day but nothing ever happened due to his mam being high up in the trust. He's gone now, so Caz is happy but he wasn't sacked, he moved on. Now he was a lazy twat!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 04:58:35 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 November, 2012, 03:15:09 PM
I've got into the habit of recording all my conversations with officialdom and such on my phone.

only legal if you tell them you're doing it.... just put on a fake-recorded message voice saying "all calls may be recorded for training and security purposes"

EDIT - just thought I'd double check that and turns out it's not true- From Ofcom:

QuoteCan I record telephone conversations on my home phone?
Yes. The relevant law, RIPA, does not prohibit individuals from recording their own communications provided that the recording is for their own use. Recording or monitoring are only prohibited where some of the contents of the communication - which can be a phone conversation or an e-mail - are made available to a third party, i.e. someone who was neither the caller or sender nor the intended recipient of the original communication. For further information see the Home Office website where RIPA is posted.

Do I have to let people know that I intend to record their telephone conversations with me?
No, provided you are not intending to make the contents of the communication available to a third party. If you are you will need the consent of the person you are recording.
I suppose a tribunal or any kind of official body would count as a third party though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 November, 2012, 05:04:07 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 November, 2012, 04:55:56 PM
I'm only saying this as I was mentioned.

Only as a salutory example of the kind of man who is never late - except that one time. Your story is exactly what I'm talking about.  It happens, even to the very best of us.

Not arguing with your thesis there either, CF - I wrote a company 'best practice' manual thingie for out-of-office work that I was quite proud of (-deep sigh-), and the first point was "To do your job, first you have to be there".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 November, 2012, 08:28:46 PM
Just reading back, I realise that I may have come across as dismissive of Noisybast's situation, or siding with his bosses. I hope not, cos you are obviously being treated shitilly NB, and I wish that ordinary folk really did have the power to challenge shit like this. I was trying to be realistic and play devil's advocate, but I don't think it came across.

Up the workers! Hope it works out mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 02 November, 2012, 09:00:58 PM
To change the subject from noisy's shitty predicament- ive just finished a very long day, which consisted of 6.5 hours at my favourite job and 5 hours at my second favourite job... But then i left work, and attempted to walk up the steps home (cf knows these steps- he lovs them) and got halfway up only to realise id in fact accidentally walked up the wrong set of steps while speaking to my wife on the phone and had to go back and start again... Which a lot like completing two thirds of the maze of zagor and having to start over. And to make matters worse, as it's pitch black and ive been typibg this as i walk, ive just fallen over and then walked into a bush.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Greg M. on 02 November, 2012, 09:05:42 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 02 November, 2012, 09:00:58 PM
Which a lot like completing two thirds of the maze of zagor and having to start over. And to make matters worse, as it's pitch black and ive been typibg this as i walk, ive just fallen over and then walked into a bush.


Bizarrely, I was just reading something about the Maze of Zagor today. Ah, synchronicity. And much as I would like to offer sympathy for your bush/self interface scenario, the visual image it supplies is just too amusing to regret your accident. Sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 02 November, 2012, 09:44:53 PM
I weep for SBT and his Steps of HELL mistake :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 02 November, 2012, 11:31:18 PM
hey at least he got some bush at the end of it ;)
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 03 November, 2012, 11:15:09 AM
Wow. I take my eye off the board for a few hours..

I'm hoping to avoid any messy disciplinary / tribunal type shenanigans in the short term and concentrate my energies on looking for a job at least twenty miles closer to home. I guess I'll just have to suck it in and start leaving home at 6:30 in the meantime.

I have, however, contacted the union for some advice - just in case. As I have tried to explain to my manager: it doesn't really matter how early I leave - it's a forty mile drive with at least two major choke points. *Anything* could happen to slow me down and then I'm screwed.

So, on Monday morning I'll have at least half an hour to kill before my shift starts. Since I won't be sleeping, I might as well bone up on Trust policies...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 04 November, 2012, 05:28:35 PM
Remember you are entitled to have a rep accompany you in disciplinary meetings and that the whole process is expected by Employment Tribunals to follow the Acas Code of Practice for Discipline & Grievance  (http://www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=1774)unless it's an exceptional circumstance (although that's covered by the code too, really.) Capability procedures also fall within this Code.

You could always take out an official grievance if you feel this manager is being unfair although I appreciate your preferred option is to find a job that is more suitable for you and I personally think that's the best option to resolve the problem at source, really. Cutting out commuting time where possible is always a good thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 10 November, 2012, 12:57:35 PM
Harrumph.

A friend of mine has started a kickstarter for his next graphic novel. I'm sort of getting over it now - people getting funding for their stuff, but this guy has got a publisher already. What he wants the TEN THOUSAND POUND target for is to "live on". He wants people to pay him to go full time.

He wants HIS FRIENDS to pay him to work. It's not for printing, it's not for resources his PUBLISHERS are fielding that presumably.

I just... it I just CAN'T. I... WHAT!??! I'm friendly with him but after this... like, I don't know. I just don't know. The CHEEK of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 10 November, 2012, 01:26:34 PM

I guess if he gets the money, and that's a big if, he's convinced enough people that he's creating an original story with a unique[ish] selling point and that he is the artist/writer capable of delivering this product on time.

Don't be too shocked at the Mercenary attitude CFM  it's just business.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 November, 2012, 01:54:47 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 10 November, 2012, 12:57:35 PMHe wants people to pay him to go full time.

Obviously don't know the details, but aren't the 'people' in question actually his customers, rather than just his friends?  Presumably they get a copy of the book they're funding, plus seductive extra goodies if they pledge, and equally presumably he'll have to pay the publisher/printer for their cut of the copies he gives out to backers?  Rather than seeking charity, doesn't it just mean he's selling to them direct, but in advance?  I'm probably missing something here.

There's a very interesting discussion thread over on the Minis site FrothersUK (http://www.frothersunite.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=40380) (http://www.frothersunite.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=40380)) which puts forward some pretty good arguments against KS, but I have to admit I'm still largely in favour - as long as the projects deliver, it still seems like a clever way to a ensure that stuff you're interested in gets made and gets into your sweaty little hands, frequently at a discount or with juicy extras.  Obviously I'm coming at it as a consumer rather than producer, but that's where I see the benefits.

Obviously if your model is just to blackmail your friends into becoming backers that's a pretty shite way  to go about things, but I'd be surprised if you could reach too many significant targets that way. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 November, 2012, 02:20:32 PM
There's a saying in the west of Scotland: shy boys get nae sweeties. It's mostly used by cunts to describe their sexually aggressive mating behaviour but it does have a broader metaphorical application.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 10 November, 2012, 02:36:03 PM
Not only his friends, but his customers. The guy already has a publisher. He wants people, regardless of their affiliation to pay his living costs while he comes out with the graphic novel. As a consumer, of course there's no difference, you donate however much - get your copy in and the knowledge you're helping someone out. Whatever.

As a creator though, whether this is just bitterness or jealousy - the guy already HAS a publishing deal. Your donation isn't going to the printing, it'll go to like - well whatever you spend your wages on.

My point with this is not really what kind of deal a customer gets - but how it looks to other creators in the same boat. Cheeky. It looks f'cking cheeky. I'm not saying he's not worthy, he's not talented or admirably tenacious, but it IS cheeky.

I only wrote it in this section because it's frustrating - do I heartily slap him on the back and say "I'M NOT DONATING BECAUSE I THINK IT'S A COMPARATIVELY FATUOUS KICKSTARTER APPEAL AND YOU'RE OUTRAGEOUSLY RUDE TO ASK BUT I ADMIRE YOUR BALLS" and carry on as before? I want to, but I also have the overwhelming urge to hate him for it. Hate him and pity myself for not having the guts to put creative determination before fear of judgement.

Harrumph. As I said at the start.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 November, 2012, 03:43:17 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 10 November, 2012, 02:36:03 PM...but how it looks to other creators in the same boat.
...
I only wrote it in this section because it's frustrating...

I can certainly see how that'd be the case!  Not questioning your reaction at all, just curious as to the specifics of the irritation, and put like that it's certainly completely understandable.  Harrumph indeed!

From my own entirely non-creative perspective I can't help but see a funded KS as functionally no different to getting a business loan (the bulk of which frequently cover salaries and other overheads while projects are completed), with the important exception that there's some hope of actually getting one, and you are pitching your idea to what is hopefully a more informed audience than your average loans officer. 

One of the more interesting arguments on the Frothers thread (aside from the general crapness of some bewilderingly successful projects) was about the central notion of 'cutting out the middle man', and what that actually meant when the middlemen in question were model/gaming shops and comics shops, and in the case of these big Minis KS projects, what it means for the industry as a whole when customers are spending $100-300 in one go, and getting a zillion minis.  How likely is that backer to spend any more dosh on minis anywhere else in the near future?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 10 November, 2012, 04:12:55 PM
What strikes me as wrong, cfm, is that you quite obviously have enough talent to make it but seem to lack the confidence. Youre a good colourist and you have an art style unlike anyone else ive seen. Im sure you could make the one your main source of comics-related income, while building up your portfolio of the other.

I dont know who your friend is, but i see absolutely nothing wrong with what he's doing, and would suggest you stop nambying about it, have a bit of confidence in your own abilities and get on with it.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 10 November, 2012, 04:19:30 PM
Nah, I agree with him. Kickstarter seems at its most honest when it's directly linked to a purchase. Asking for money for "development" is when I get uncomfortable, and this goes that bit further. IMO unless you're an established comics pro you should be presenting something tangible before you ask for investment.

But I agree with this sentiment: draw stuff, CFM. Your art is great.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 10 November, 2012, 06:24:20 PM
CrazyFox, best advice I can offer is:

Don't worry about it. I can understand why it sits ill with you, but at the end of the day, agonising over it isn't going to help you much.

Something I've tried to do since I started touting for and getting paying gigs is to keep to a mindset of 'worry about what I do, be uninterested in what others do'. That's a challenge for me, because if I'm honest, it's not my natural temperament.

In my current situation, I'd like to be doing a HELL of a lot more in comics than I already am. There's literally a dozen things that conspire to take my time away from that.

But I seem to be perpetually yanking my day job out of trouble. I'm also caring for a seriously ill relative who needs to have oxygen and medication administered sometimes well into the early hours of the morning. So I wake up each morning feeling absolutely slaughtered. I've also had some potentially serious health problems of my own (now thankfully looking as if they're addressed) not to mention financial worries.

It's hard enough for me to find time and the inclination to be creative and get anything done with all this on my mind at any one time. If I focused too much on some of the stuff I see going on around me in comics circles that does my crust in, I'd not only be getting next to nothing done - I'd go crazy. As it is, I've just come through one monumental pile of nonsense that could have been easily avoided - and take it from me, it's just not worth the anxiety.

The best thing to do is just knuckle down, be productive, and have fun with it. This is how I've handled things. Last weekend I sat down to draw a one-pager, witht he intent that it would be the most ambitious thing I've ever drawn. I've been so busy with it that I've just not had TIME to dwell on anything that's getting me down - even though I'm certainly still living with those things. The result? I have work that I'm proud of, that I'm having fun creating - and I'm much, much happier for having ploughed my energies into it.

Not meaning this as a 'pull yer knickers up' sort of post, CrazyFox. I'm just saying, you can get frustrated at this stuff really easily, but it doesn't really do anything to further your own aspirations.

Keep busy, keep productive, and forget everything else. It's the only way forward, really.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 06:39:50 PM
See, this exactly how the banks work.

When you get a loan, they're not lending you actual money, they're lending you credit. A promise to pay.

Specifically, your promise to pay. So they're actually lending you your own credit, which is cheeky. Cheekier still, they charge you interest for using your own credit. At least your friend isn't doing that, Foxy.

And yeah - your art is coming along a treat. Focus on that, not stuff you have no power over. And if you don't want to contribute then don't, there's no need to fall out with your mate over it. Besides, money and mates rarely mix well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 November, 2012, 07:25:09 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 06:39:50 PM
When you get a loan, they're not lending you actual money, they're lending you credit. A promise to pay.

Specifically, your promise to pay. So they're actually lending you your own credit, which is cheeky. Cheekier still, they charge you interest for using your own credit. At least your friend isn't doing that, Foxy.
Okay, you're going to have to explain that first part to me again more slowly. I'm fairly certain they lend you actual money because no amount of semantics changes the fact that you can take it all home with you and put it in a shoebox behind the air vent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 November, 2012, 07:26:43 PM
Noooooooooooooooo :o

You've done it now Cosh :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 10 November, 2012, 07:44:06 PM
I believe the idea is that money is an abstract concept. More "promises" - ie banknotes with said promise printed on them - exist than actual assets, like gold. Therefore banks are built on shaky foundations.

Shock fucking exclusive, that.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 07:45:10 PM
On a £5 note it says 'I promise to pay the bearer, on demand, the sum of five pounds'.

It does not say 'I promise to redeem this note for 5lb of gold'.

We use currency (a promise to pay) and not money (a promise to redeem). Whether you keep the promisary notes in a shoebox or a digital form is irrelevant, they are still backed only by promises to pay in the future.

Yes, you can buy gold with currency - which at present is probably a wise thing to do - but neither governments or banks are obliged to redeem currency for gold. This is why they can issue as much currency, and demand as much interest, as they can mathematically create. This leads to inescapable debt and inflation. Simples!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 10 November, 2012, 07:49:09 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 10 November, 2012, 07:25:09 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 06:39:50 PM
When you get a loan, they're not lending you actual money, they're lending you credit. A promise to pay. Specifically, your promise to pay. So they're actually lending you your own credit, which is cheeky. Cheekier still, they charge you interest for using your own credit. At least your friend isn't doing that, Foxy.

Okay, you're going to have to explain that first part to me again more slowly. I'm fairly certain they lend you actual money because no amount of semantics changes the fact that you can take it all home with you and put it in a shoebox behind the air vent.

The banks or credit card companies don't actually have your hundred quid sitting anywhere. If the world's financial institutions tried to realise their assets it wouldn't meet the value of all the credit in play around the world today. They invent and imagine some theoretical money based on their expectations of your future ability to earn more imaginary money to make good on their imaginary debt. That money you stuff in the shoe box only has any value as long as folk believe it does; if they stop believing in it (or you) you might as well be hoarding your own shite (see Zimbabwe).

The world's financial systems work for the same reason that Santa's sleigh can fly and Tinkerbell is brought back to life in stage versions of Peter Pan. Every now and again the sleigh dips low in the sky, Tinkerbell starts to look peekit, and everyone has to screw up their eyes and really believe so that everything can carry on as before.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 November, 2012, 08:13:13 PM
Money is an abstraction we collectively agree upon in order not to have to carry x number of pigs and eggs around with us. This much I get. Why is one amount of this abstraction different from another (specifically referring to TLS' original bit about "When you get a loan, they're not lending you actual money, they're lending you credit." here) in any meaningful way. And why does it matter if the basis of the abstraction is notionally tied to quantities of one substances (whose own inherent value is just as much of an abstraction when it comes down to feeding a family) or not?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 November, 2012, 08:18:19 PM
We could all go back to the barter system!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 08:44:33 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 10 November, 2012, 08:13:13 PM
Money is an abstraction we collectively agree upon in order not to have to carry x number of pigs and eggs around with us. This much I get. Why is one amount of this abstraction different from another (specifically referring to TLS' original bit about "When you get a loan, they're not lending you actual money, they're lending you credit." here) in any meaningful way. And why does it matter if the basis of the abstraction is notionally tied to quantities of one substances (whose own inherent value is just as much of an abstraction when it comes down to feeding a family) or not?

Excellent question.

I reckon that we're going to start hearing a lot about returning to the Gold Standard pretty soon. That is, directly backing currency with gold. (As a heads-up, don't go for it - because he who controls the gold controls the Standard and at the moment the ones who own the most gold are private corporations.) But anyway.

With classical money, there can only ever be so much money because there can only ever be so much gold to back it. The actual material backing money isn't important, as Sauchie pointed out, it's our faith in it. Gold and silver were traditionally used because they are both relatively uncommon metals and it's easy and convenient to strike them into coins. So long as there are enough coins circulating throughout a society then everyone should have access to at least basic provisions (in an ideal world).

I think that this is a fair representation of what everyone believes money to be.

In the 1600's a family of goldsmiths hit upon a marvellous scheme. As goldsmiths, they had the best safes and so agreed to look after other people's gold for them. If someone deposited five pieces of gold in the goldsmiths' vaults, they would be given notes to the same value. Soon, people found it easier to trade with these notes than with bulky gold coins.

As time went on, the goldsmiths noticed that more gold was being deposited than was being withdrawn and hit upon a cunning plan - which they would call 'fractional reserve lending' and I call 'theft'. They began to issue more notes than they had gold. These notes were issued as loans which were redeemable in gold. That is, you could pay the goldsmiths back with gold or more notes - which you'd have to earn, steal or borrow. Just like today.

Eventually, the goldsmiths gave up goldsmithing and became international bankers, lending to princes, kings, emperors, presidents, corporations, warmongers, pacifists, churches, governments and you and me.

The answer to the vast majority of the world's problems today is to take away the goldsmiths' power to issue those notes and return that privelige to the people, where it properly belongs. When this happens, it doesn't really matter how or what a currency is tied to or backed by. It's your faith in it that counts, just like today. The crucial difference will be that publically created money can be spent into society exactly the same way as it is today (paying for public goods and services) with no need for any interest or, indeed, repayment. (It's a little more complicate than that, but I'm conscious that I'm ranting about an ostensibly boring subject in completely the wrong thread...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 10 November, 2012, 08:47:41 PM
Aaaaaaaaaaanyway... I like sweeties. There's a marvellous shop near us that specialises in old-fashioned ones. I like the aniseed balls.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 09:03:04 PM
When it comes to balls, there's only one winner...


Now there's a place in Wigan a place you all should know
A busy little factory where things are all the go
They don't make Jakes or Eccles Cakes or things to stick on walls
But night and day they work away at Uncle Joe's Mint Balls

Chorus (to be sung after each verse)

Uncle Joe's Mint Balls keep you all aglow
Give 'em to your grannie and watch the beggar go
Away with coughs and sniffles, take a few in hand
Suck 'em and see, you'll agree
They're the best in all the land

Me dad has always wanted curly hair on his bald head
Suck an Uncle Joe's Mint Ball that's what the doctor said
So he got an Uncle Joe's Mint Ball and sucked it all night long
When he got up next morning, he'd hairs all over his tongue

Me uncle Albert passed away from ale upon the brain
The doctors said that he were dead and would never walk again
So they gave the corpse an Uncle Joe's and then stood back aghast
Cos the corpse jumped up and ran to the pub and spent the insurance brass

Me granny said me granddad 'e were gettin' old and slow
And fire in grandad's boiler 'ad gone out long ago
So 'e got an Uncle Joe's Mint Ball, sucked it all the night
But his hot breath singed her vest and set the bed alight

We 'ad a pigeon it were bald and couldn't fly too fast
Never won places in the races, always come in last
Though it were bald, no feathers at all it won a race one day
We give it an Uncle Joe's Mint Ball and it ran al't bloody way

I had a girl her name was May in passion she were lackin'
Fed 'er with whisky to make 'er frisky, still she wouldn't get crackin'
So I gave her an Uncle Joe's Mint Ball to get 'er all aglow
Now she combs the streets of Wigan, looking for Uncle Joe!

We gave some to the coalman's 'orse as it stood in the road
It gave a cough then beggared off with it's cart an' load
It ran onto the racecourse going like a bird
Covered the track with nutty slack and came first, second and third

The RSPCA have bought six tons of Uncle Joe's
To give to all the animules to keep 'em all aglow
Our budgie now is six foot tall, the cat is eight foot three
And all the poor brass monkeys are as happy as can be.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 10 November, 2012, 09:13:26 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 08:44:33 PM
In the 1600's a family of goldsmiths hit upon a marvellous scheme. As goldsmiths, they had the best safes and so agreed to look after other people's gold for them. If someone deposited five pieces of gold in the goldsmiths' vaults, they would be given notes to the same value. Soon, people found it easier to trade with these notes than with bulky gold coins.

Goldsmiths (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Goldsmith#Early_life_and_family_background), eh? What did a Rothschild make in the olden days?

Quote from: Trout on 10 November, 2012, 08:47:41 PM
Aaaaaaaaaaanyway... I like sweeties. There's a marvellous shop near us that specialises in old-fashioned ones. I like the aniseed balls.

Aniseed balls are an abstraction, if all the supposedly aniseed balls in circulation today ....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 November, 2012, 09:58:10 PM
I've just realised that a minor impediment in my own life is that The Legendary Shark doesn't drink in my local.  It would elevate those setting-the-world-to-rights high-stool sessions to a whole new level.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 November, 2012, 10:00:50 PM
And fisticuffs.

Never forget the fisticuffs ;)








(I think that my minor impediment is that I don't know when to shut up.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 10 November, 2012, 11:40:27 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 November, 2012, 09:58:10 PM
I've just realised that a minor impediment in my own life is that The Legendary Shark doesn't drink in my local.  It would elevate those setting-the-world-to-rights high-stool sessions to a whole new level.

Yup.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 11 November, 2012, 03:43:28 AM
My minor impediments today were that a bank machine gobbled up my debit card when I attempted to withdraw a tenner. (It didn't give me the tenner either, the greedy little blighter!)

Then when I called the 'missing card' number* they asked me for three digits of my security number. I couldn't remember it as I hardly use it. (I tend to use internet banking and it's not he same as my internet banking ID number. I think I had to use it when I first set up internet banking, but after that I use different codes.) I tried the one on my secure key card, but that didn't work. Three tries later... the code is locked. Grrrr!  And I'm going out to dinner next Tuesday...

Anyway, I should be off Monday so I guess I can sort it out then. Although it's doubtful the card will arrive in time for Tuesday, but I'm hoping that I will be able to withdraw cash with my knowledge of sort code and account number.

Except.... my branch is closed for refurbishment, and I think other branches need a guarantee card (which happens to be the same thing as the debit card) to do that... Maybe I'll have to just use the credit card.

So annoying. And I'll admit, a bit amusing. A little bit.

*It's actually the one for when your card is actually lost or stolen. I'm not sure it's the correct one to call, but I didn't see any 'machine ate my card' numbers on the website.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 November, 2012, 05:04:04 PM
See, this is what happens when you rely on imaginary money looked after by pirates.



Sorry, I just had to.


I resisted for hours, honest I did.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 November, 2012, 05:50:52 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 11 November, 2012, 05:04:04 PM
...looked after by pirates.

If only!

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xkzip3_the-crimson-permanent-assurance-part-2_shortfilms (http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xkzip3_the-crimson-permanent-assurance-part-2_shortfilms)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 11 November, 2012, 06:38:09 PM
QuoteI resisted for hours, honest I did.

As I see when comparing posting times.  :lol:

Anyway, a call later and all sorted.

I was told 3-5 days for the card, which seems normal. Looks like I'll have to use the credit card for that dinner on Tuesday... (A bit awkward in these group affairs when bill tend to be sorted in one go.)

A small small issue in the scheme of things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 11 November, 2012, 07:25:12 PM
Tsk! One of my Cabbalistics pages has slipped in it's mount. I'll be going to the framers this week sometime for something else so I'll see if they'll rectify it for free. It's annoying as it's the last page of a whole episode I have going up the stairs, so it's just at the top of the stairs and ruins the whole flow.

Plus I didn't get my comic yesterday - it'd better turn up tomorrow or I'll be off to the 'Life spugs' thread.

M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 November, 2012, 11:33:36 AM
two irritations today: My copy of Aaaiiee was too big for letterbox, so I arranged redelivery to my local post office for today - turned up and was told it wouldn't be there till after 1.30, which means it'll be another week before I can collect it.

Also, I bought my Thought Bubble ticket weeks ago and put it somewhere safe - I now have no clue where it is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 November, 2012, 12:47:25 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 14 November, 2012, 11:33:36 AM,,,which means it'll be another week before I can collect it.

You poor sod - it's ace!

Similarly, my newsagent finally decided to start stocking 2000AD again after a month of sour mutterings from me (yay!), but they've shifted to a Thursday delivery (boo!).  Why, Grud, why!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 16 November, 2012, 11:10:47 AM
In the most predictable turn of events England are already three wickets down in the Test match with India and clearly going to lose. Unless it rains for the next three days or we somehow learn how to play spin bowling overnight.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 16 November, 2012, 12:20:29 PM
Just got the word from my employer. I have to work tomorrow. Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 17 November, 2012, 07:22:14 PM
I recently mislaid my mobile phone on the way home.

Then found I couldn't find the charger for my spare.

On the plus side I have another spare* which I thought had stopped charging, but I left it on overnight and it was alive to greet me this morning. (The reason I though it woudn't charge was because when the battery is flat I will sometimes plug it in and switch it on the mains if I wish to use it there and then. This wouldn't turn on for some reason. After some juice it seems to be fine though.)

It's just a cute little Samsung with few extras (not that any of my phones to date have been that spectacular) but I'm fond of it. My replacement sim card came in the post yesterday so now it has a new home. Until/if I upgrade anyway.

*Why so many phones?** A long story, but I didn't collect that many intentionally.

**Actually there's one other too which works, but the back cover has broken off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 21 November, 2012, 04:49:22 PM
As today has been the wettest and most miserable day for ages, now would be a good time for my boiler to pack up. Which, indeed, it has.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 23 November, 2012, 05:07:03 PM
Some just came to my door to show me that my car was damaged. Some prick smashed into the back of my parked car wrecking the back and window. What a dick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 23 November, 2012, 07:45:55 PM
Quote from: Judge von Boom on 23 November, 2012, 05:07:03 PM
Some just came to my door to show me that my car was damaged. Some prick smashed into the back of my parked car wrecking the back and window. What a dick.

Arse.
Sorry VonB, hope the insurance covers it and it works out in your favour.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 25 November, 2012, 11:56:58 PM
Cause it seems like these days,  every damn time I have more than a couple of days off work and am going away somewhere, I will without fail come down with a cold.

I also now seem to not get conventional colds any more, but meta-colds that seem to strike me down for 24 hours, then immediately go away, then return with a vengeance 10-14 days later.

Is this an immune system thing (you relax as soon as you have a few days off so your immunity lets its guard down), one of those things that happens as you get older that no one warns you about?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 November, 2012, 08:04:06 AM
Quote from: radiator on 25 November, 2012, 11:56:58 PM
Is this an immune system thing (you relax as soon as you have a few days off so your immunity lets its guard down), one of those things that happens as you get older that no one warns you about?

The former, from my own experience with similar.

Back when I had regular work+holidays the same thing used to happen to me.  I'd be working through the night for a few days before I headed off, then frantically dealing with e-mails in ferry port internet cafes and writing quotes in my tent, and then when I was a few days into the break it'd all be as done as it was going to get, I'd have a day or two of blissful holidayness and actually relax, and whomph, I'd be stretched out shivering with a chest infection or suchlike unpleasantness.  Regular as clockwork.  Last year, the first year of my quasi-/unemployment, despite all the stresses that entails, was the first year I can remember that I didn't fall ill between Christmas and New Year.  Whether that was because I have no excuse to ever relax anymore, or the pattern of intensity/relaxation is broken, I don't know.

And I was a youngish fittish man back then, not the shambling wreck you see before you.  And all for nothing, nothing at all!  Beware oh youth, gather ye rosebuds while ye may! 

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 26 November, 2012, 09:01:20 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 26 November, 2012, 08:04:06 AM
And I was a youngish fittish man back then, not the shambling wreck you see before you.  And all for nothing, nothing at all!  Beware oh youth, gather ye rosebuds while ye may!

Right, I have a bag full of rosebuds, much to my neighbour's disquiet.
What do I do now TB?

A lithe and vigorous 38 year old Minky
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 November, 2012, 12:38:15 PM
Check your food labels for things like aspartame (http://www.holisticmed.com/aspartame/recent.html) (which is found in diet pop, chewing gum, yogurt, cooking sauces, crisps, artificial sweeteners, sugar-free products and cereals, to name but a few) and cut them out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 26 November, 2012, 12:50:41 PM
Yep Tordel you're right, come to think of it i seem to have a cold on at least half of all Christmas Days!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 November, 2012, 01:11:25 PM
Quote from: Minkyboy on 26 November, 2012, 09:01:20 AM
Right, I have a bag full of rosebuds, much to my neighbour's disquiet.
What do I do now TB?

I think it's a metaphor for nipples, so just do what feels best. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bEGLbCNRqw (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bEGLbCNRqw) (Stick with it, it's genius).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 26 November, 2012, 07:27:01 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 26 November, 2012, 12:38:15 PM
Check your food labels for things like aspartame (http://www.holisticmed.com/aspartame/recent.html) (which is found in diet pop, chewing gum, yogurt, cooking sauces, crisps, artificial sweeteners, sugar-free products and cereals, to name but a few) and cut them out.

I prefer ostentatiously covering my mouth and nose when some prick is ignorant enough to sneeze or cough in my vicinity without doing the same. It makes you look like an idiot, but it's worth it not to spend your weekend feeling rotten. Why haven't folk got the hang of acting on a simple principle that's been a mainstay of public health campaigns (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W728NGYhmmQ) for almost a century?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 26 November, 2012, 10:35:02 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 26 November, 2012, 12:38:15 PM
Check your food labels for things like aspartame (http://www.holisticmed.com/aspartame/recent.html) (which is found in diet pop, chewing gum, yogurt, cooking sauces, crisps, artificial sweeteners, sugar-free products and cereals, to name but a few) and cut them out.

Okay TLS, I cut out Aspartame out of all the food labels, now what do I do?  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 27 November, 2012, 02:39:01 PM
My immune system was quite awful for a while because I was stressed. Since my job got more interesting I stopped getting a cold as soon as the holiday started. Having said that it's probably a cert for Xmas.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 27 November, 2012, 07:55:48 PM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 26 November, 2012, 10:35:02 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 26 November, 2012, 12:38:15 PM
Check your food labels for things like aspartame (http://www.holisticmed.com/aspartame/recent.html) [...] and cut them out.
Okay TLS, I cut out Aspartame out of all the food labels, now what do I do?  :D

You stick your own mini-label in the gap -- featuring some vaguely sugary-sounding crap, like 'sucralose' -- and cynically hope that you can confuse cutomers into thinking that you've stopped adding artificial sweeteners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 29 November, 2012, 06:35:44 PM
Turned a customers front room into a swimming pool today. Why O Why do they cover the copper piping with a plastic sheath that prevents a pipe detector from doing its job.
At least I won't be getting a hefty bill for the damages.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 30 November, 2012, 08:38:12 PM
Blank screen of death on my Iphone. Now I have to use an old brick for calls and god knows where my old CDman is. O the bright side, my old Nokia only needs charged once a month, and I'll eventually get the newer model of Iphone in the same fashion as I got this one; wait for one of my sisters to get an upgrade. It's how I've procured every phone I've ever owned.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 01 December, 2012, 11:01:19 AM
It's Baltic up here in calhab and a slight thaw yesterday means a thin veneer of ice everywhere today. I'm just heading down the hill to start spreading salt and grit.

Even then, my previously completely capable wife and daughter will find it impossible to walk up and down the hill unaided until around February.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 01 December, 2012, 11:25:33 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 01 December, 2012, 11:01:19 AM
It's Baltic up here in calhab and a slight thaw yesterday means a thin veneer of ice everywhere today. I'm just heading down the hill to start spreading salt and grit.
Evil Tips. Ruining winter for small boys everywhere.

My minor impediment for the day is that for the past couple of months my Prog has arrived between 12 and 12:30 on Saturday. Today, I have to be at the airport for 1.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 01 December, 2012, 11:57:57 PM
Motorcycle - emergency stop fail - me now wearing enough bandages (ok tubigrip) to be right side of the invisible man :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 02 December, 2012, 01:52:35 PM
That's terrible Emp. I hope your injuries are only minor and heal quickly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 December, 2012, 03:23:09 PM
Not good Emp!  Glad you came out of it more or less intact.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 03 December, 2012, 09:48:21 AM
because I've come to work without my flash drive...

So all the script feedback, new scripts in and pages delivered over the weekend will have to be unlooked at till tomorrow and I may even have to actually... work today.

Bah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2012, 03:39:36 PM
Just had one of those shop variant IDW Dredds turn up from the US and now I know why the postage and packaging is so drokkin' high!

(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/A9M1wpSCIAIP5wG.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 03 December, 2012, 03:41:13 PM
Bloody hell!

That's really big waste, CF?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2012, 03:43:36 PM
I wondered what it was at first (so many items bought in the last few weeks) and when I opened it up I was gobsmacked. Why can't they use one of those photo - Please do not bend - envelopes. It would be a LOT cheaper  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 03 December, 2012, 03:49:05 PM
They probably realised who they were shipping to and didn't want an international incident CF.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 December, 2012, 03:54:42 PM
I think a lot of postie's view "PHOTOGRAPHS DO NOT BEND" as an inaccurate statement of fact, rather than an instruction, to which their response is "Oh yes they do!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 03 December, 2012, 04:22:24 PM
I am sure an environment agency would like to see that picture.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 03 December, 2012, 06:20:07 PM
Certainly O.T.T for a comic, but ill take 'packaged so securely that it takes 10 minutes to open' any day.
Ive seen photos of an expensive 2000ad original art page crumpled almost beyond recognition, due to flimsy packaging. Shudder.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 03 December, 2012, 07:28:24 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 03 December, 2012, 03:54:42 PM
a lot of postie's view "PHOTOGRAPHS DO NOT BEND" as an inaccurate statement of fact, rather than an instruction

Arf!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 03 December, 2012, 07:31:00 PM
Don't get me going on posters being bent in the post  >:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 December, 2012, 04:02:59 PM
My computer died so I had to Frankenstein one together out of three old ones, re-format my drives and reinstall Windows. I've lost all my emails since April. I can't remember the name of that really useful little add-on that I like. Microsoft Update won't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 04 December, 2012, 04:26:05 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 04 December, 2012, 04:02:59 PM
Microsoft Update won't.

Probably for the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 December, 2012, 04:53:31 PM
Quote from: Judge von Boom on 04 December, 2012, 04:26:05 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 04 December, 2012, 04:02:59 PM
Microsoft Update won't.

Probably for the best.

It did and it wasn't.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 05 December, 2012, 07:00:54 PM
Tube up the spout north of rickmansworth lovely freezing coldd & no info train finally arrived now crawling home will take maybe another hour. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 05 December, 2012, 11:45:17 PM
I still have a dead leg from footy on Tuesday night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 06 December, 2012, 10:52:21 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 05 December, 2012, 11:45:17 PM
I still have a dead leg from footy on Tuesday night.

I broke my leg in three places playing footie nearly 2 years ago and it still ain't right. Just saying.

As for me: this is the busiest time of year. 3 week month, but 3 months of work = 80+ hour weeks. Working 8.30am - 3.00am today. Yay!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 December, 2012, 03:43:12 PM
My 92 year old granddad gave us a big scare today. He had been up half the night coughing really bad not getting much sleep. He rang my mum saying he wasn't feeling too well. I took her round this morning. When he didn't answer the door I looked through the window and he was slumped in his chair. I was seconds from kicking the front door in when he got up and answered.
Doctor eventually came round and has put him on antibiotics for a chest infection. The blood he was coughing up was probably from all the hacking from his restless night.
He was very disoriented this morning but seem better now and wants to change his doctor as the one that came round is lovely. His words not mine.




V




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 13 December, 2012, 01:35:01 AM
Just logging off work for the night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 December, 2012, 12:01:59 PM
I finished at 4.30am. I was supposed to finish at 11.30pm. Urgh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 13 December, 2012, 12:12:27 PM
Back at work today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 December, 2012, 04:32:42 PM
Dislocated my shoulder. It hurt like hell and worse putting it back. Now it's throbbing dully. Feck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 13 December, 2012, 05:26:09 PM
I dislocated my shoulder a couple of years back by falling off a bicycle. luckily I was absolutely hammered when it happened* so didn't feel the pain as badly as i could but it still wasn't much fun.

*I realise my drunkeness almost certainly caused the accident as well as acting as a painkiller.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 December, 2012, 06:17:10 PM
ouch! I once dislocated my elbow falling over when very drunk (which the A&E doc said shouldn't be possible). Tried to get up for about 20 minutes without realising why my arm kept giving way under me. After  a brief nap on the pavement, I managed to get up by rolling over and sitting up. I staggered home and would've gone to bed if my flatmate hadn't noticed the alarming angle of my elbow joint and taken me to hospital. Didn't hurt at all at the time, but was bloody agony for the next couple of weeks. I feel for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 December, 2012, 07:05:41 PM
I wish I'd been drunk at the time, then I wouldn't feel such a complete plank. Wet floor + old Docs = painful embarrassment.  :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 17 December, 2012, 09:56:52 PM
Are any of you finding that things aren't as good as they used to be.
My lad recieved an Airfix model of a Red Arrows Gnat for his birthday. The actual model cut seemed substandard, The pilot was barely recognisable as a figure with very little detail and it took four coats of the provided paint to get a semi decent finish on the red.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 December, 2012, 01:04:24 PM
Because the stupid bitch who lives upstairs from us had another passive-aggressive pop at me yesterday about a housewarming party we had a couple of months ago, muttering vague threats about the housing association.

Granted, it went on very late and yeah - we probably made a load of noise. We won't be having a party like that again. We did, however, send out an advance warning/apology, and invited all of the residents to come and join us for a drink.

And at the end of the day - people have parties. That's a thing that happens, especially around this time of year. If we were having parties or playing loud music late into the night every single weekend and on weeknights, I could sympathise with her whinging - but we've had precisely two parties in the six months we've lived there, which isn't unreasonable imo. This silly cow keeps banging on about the fact that families and children live in our flats, which imo is typical of this silly modern attitude that we should all fucking bow down to parents and their wonderful, special children. If that's the way she feels then maybe the edgy, noisy, young, vibrant part of East London we live in perhaps isn't the best place to raise little Barney and Trixibelle? As I pointed out to her, some of us don't have children.

I'm trying to work out if this woman's feelings are indicative of the rest of the residents and they all secretly hate us or if she's just a lone weirdo busybody - the last time she had a go at us for making noise was on a night we had four people round for drinks, and they all left before midnight, and that was on a Saturday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 24 December, 2012, 11:12:49 AM
misery guts and her hubby from next door are playing a game of how childish can they be... we broke up an old cupboard from our daughters room and put the bits out for the council with a few others it not being on the list the council propped the bits neatly against the halfway down the drive naff iron fence . the next day it had been pushed over also knocking my wifes japanese maple pot over i stood them up again only for it to happen again!  last night i stacked them neatly inches away from the fence of naff and lo and behold! again so ive tried again and wedged another pot in os the cow better leave them alone .

  this is the nutter who had a phase of lettin ours and a neighbours tyres down on a regular basis obviously going out at stupid o clock to do it tho we could never prove it when my neighbour put cctv on his garage to view the drives it stopped and she erected n other fence between the two drives agin halfway down!


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 December, 2012, 12:42:28 PM
QuoteMy lad recieved an Airfix model of a Red Arrows Gnat for his birthday.
I've asked for a Bristol Beaufighter for Christmas so I hope it's not all covered in flash and stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 24 December, 2012, 02:21:10 PM
My car's clutch has died. After 22,500 miles!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 27 December, 2012, 01:55:43 PM
Yesterday i came down with some yucktastic illness, sending me to bed for most of the day- and when i wasnt in bed i was being disgustingly sick down the bog. This is in addition to my double trigger-finger (both hands) which means i wake up in agony each day and unable to move my fingers. Oh, and my spinal damage- the MRI results of which i am still waiting for.

Today my wife buggered off to Germany for a tour and isnt back til New Year's Day, and ive got two kids bouncing around demanding entertainment despite having received a fortune in cool stuff not two days ago.

Excuse me while i lay here and quietly die.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 27 December, 2012, 09:26:22 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 27 December, 2012, 01:55:43 PM
ive got two kids bouncing around demanding entertainment despite having received a fortune in cool stuff not two days ago.


I hear ya!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 29 December, 2012, 07:59:59 PM
I hope you feel much better soon SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 January, 2013, 03:04:48 PM
First day of work, first cold of the year. Great.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 03 January, 2013, 03:31:32 PM
Thats a stinker alright. The previous two years ive got all the way through Christmas only to come down with summat when it was time to go back to work. And last years was a right bastard.
So was quite pleased when my xmas cold happened just as i was finishing work, and was pretty much gone by the 26th/27th.

Hope yours soon passes, SuperSurfer
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 January, 2013, 04:03:24 PM
Me too! It's my birthday today, work is particularly shit and stressful today and I feel like death warmed up. Scratch that, I don't even feel warmed up. I'd be at home if I hadn't taken too many sick days last year!

I blame it on all that midnight germ-swapping on Monday night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 03 January, 2013, 06:26:41 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 03 January, 2013, 04:03:24 PM
Me too! It's my birthday today, work is particularly shit and stressful today and I feel like death warmed up. Scratch that, I don't even feel warmed up. I'd be at home if I hadn't taken too many sick days last year!

I blame it on all that midnight germ-swapping on Monday night.

Ah, happy birthday anyway. :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 January, 2013, 07:01:38 PM
Thank you. The day was somewhat improved by the nice bottle of Jura malt that my colleagues gave me from the obligatory team whip round. I'm home now so it's a hot toddy and an early night!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 04 January, 2013, 01:38:42 AM
Thanks Judge Jack. At the moment it's just a regular cold but still a pain. Think I went a whole year without a bad cold or cough.

Hope you had a good birthday DDD.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 04 January, 2013, 10:19:59 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 03 January, 2013, 04:03:24 PM
Me too! It's my birthday today, work is particularly shit and stressful today and I feel like death warmed up. Scratch that, I don't even feel warmed up. I'd be at home if I hadn't taken too many sick days last year!

I blame it on all that midnight germ-swapping on Monday night.
I forget we share the same birthday. I also had a shitty birthday but mine kind of extended from before the new year and at the moment I am still feeling shit. At least I took the week off work though.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 January, 2013, 05:34:46 PM
Been sitting in all day, screwdrivers at the ready, waiting for all the bits to build a new PC. Fucking useless DPD couriers clearly aren't going to turn up now. No notification, no update of tracking status on their site. Wankstains.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 06 January, 2013, 01:21:18 PM
All good things must come to an end, i guess, as its back to work for me tomorrow,  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 06 January, 2013, 02:01:35 PM
Yep, work for me tomorrow too and we've got to take down the decorations and pack them off for another year.  Misery Sunday :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 07 January, 2013, 11:54:16 AM
because I get to work and discover my flash drive is still in the home PC. That means no scripts being read today and I can't hassle a certain retail establishment for comics they have had for nearly 8 months and not yet paid as I can't provide the evidence I sorted yesterday. SharkBah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Radbacker on 07 January, 2013, 11:58:43 AM
I work in Air-conditioning, tis rather hot, tis also ridiculously busey.
Its 8pm and still 41 degrees (centigrade no idea what that is in the old out of date scale the US uses)down from a high of 45, gonna be a wonderful balmy 46 tommorow and the next day, been 40+ for about a week our hottest run of weather for several years.

CU Radbacker
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2013, 12:02:09 PM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 07 January, 2013, 11:54:16 AM
because I get to work and discover my flash drive is still in the home PC. That means no scripts being read today and I can't hassle a certain retail establishment for comics they have had for nearly 8 months and not yet paid as I can't provide the evidence I sorted yesterday. SharkBah!

Ah! This explains the lack of emails this
Morning...!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 07 January, 2013, 12:15:42 PM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 07 January, 2013, 11:54:16 AM
SharkBah!

FTFY.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 07 January, 2013, 01:01:46 PM
Quote from: Bolt-01
because I get to work and discover my flash drive is still in the home PC.

Have you thought about using Dropbox or Skydrive et al?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2013, 01:14:03 PM
Aye, Dropbox changed my working patterns completely.  As a non-smartdevice person, being freed from having to use a specific computer or remember to bring my storage devices everywhere was a godsend.  Now a few minutes free time anywhere there's a willing computer with an internet connection means I can pick up my work exactly where I left off, and share/send anything I want just by mailing a link (although not being entirely trusting of Google Apps I do tend to create a trail of Open/LibreOffice installations in my wake... but I think of it as leaving a little present for the system).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 07 January, 2013, 01:31:40 PM
Dropbox is indeed wonderful, and I do use it increasingly, but I've not got it on the PC at work and I'm not about to add it. Works PC and all that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2013, 01:43:47 PM
Ah, but you don't need to add the app, that's the real beauty of it!  You can just access your files through pretty much any browser.  No more dog-ate-my-homework for you, sonny!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 January, 2013, 01:52:47 PM
Quote from: TotalHack on 07 January, 2013, 01:43:47 PM
Ah, but you don't need to add the app, that's the real beauty of it!  You can just access your files through pretty much any browser.  No more dog-ate-my-homework for you, sonny!
Unless your work's web security policy blocks the site.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 January, 2013, 02:07:27 PM
Indeed, but isn't a workplace so-inclined going to have a USB Key ban too?  ;)

But I take your point, if it's non-work work you don't want to be leaving muddy Small-Press-size footprints all over the use logs.  Looks like it's Suduko for you today, Bolt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 07 January, 2013, 02:25:11 PM
Nah I'm actually working! Well, mostly...

I have started on my entry for the art comp :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2013, 02:31:37 PM
Bought a pair of shoes yesterday. Go to put them on this morning to find they gave me the wrong left shoe, which is lighter grey than the right. I now have to find the time this week to go back into central London to exchange it.

I suppose you could say I should have checked them myself before leaving the shop, but I had this crazy idea that checking you're putting the correct pair of shoes in the box is the absolute minimum of what you should be capable of if you work in a shoe shop. For fuck's sake.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 07 January, 2013, 02:37:17 PM
If I was you I'd phone them and demand they sort it out. The least they should do is give you a voucher as an apology.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 January, 2013, 02:45:59 PM
Nah, that would involve confrontation, and I'm English.

I should have known - the staff all looked about 12 and were all mucking around in the shop, not a care in the world. Doubt I'll even get an apology - it probably happens all the time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 January, 2013, 02:52:02 PM
While Christmas shopping, I treated myself to a pair of Batman cufflinks (as nobody I know would be savvy enough to get me anything so cool).

I wore them on NYE and chucked the shirt in the washing basket. Just called the laundrette and confirmed that i forgot to remove them when I dropped my washing off the other day - I was too late to prevent them going through the machines, but the kind lady dug out my bag and found one intact and the broken back off the other. *sigh*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 07 January, 2013, 03:09:56 PM
poop
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 08 January, 2013, 10:49:41 AM
Car has just failed MOt in spectacular fashion. Now I need to find money I do not have to buy another one... Like now.

Happy New Year!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 10 January, 2013, 11:17:05 AM
Lost out on some art on ebay which made my son cry and in turn left me more upset than it really should  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 12 January, 2013, 11:23:33 AM
Whanged my bloody shin drunkenly leaping up the garden in a cider-fuelled attempt to imitate Mario. Now I have a big swollen cut and a hangover. ALSO THE MEG IS DUE TO ARRIVE TODAY WITH AMERICAN REAPER IN IT. FML.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 14 January, 2013, 09:04:04 PM
No fucking postie today = No Dredd 3D. It's only a little bit of snow. Pussy.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 06:30:16 PM
We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 15 January, 2013, 09:17:55 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 06:30:16 PM
We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 09:20:04 PM
Quote from: Supermarine Troutfire on 15 January, 2013, 09:17:55 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 06:30:16 PM
We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

......yes. Yes he did.  :-/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 15 January, 2013, 10:26:08 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 09:20:04 PM
Quote from: Supermarine Troutfire on 15 January, 2013, 09:17:55 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 06:30:16 PM
We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

......yes. Yes he did.  :-/

What a wanker!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 15 January, 2013, 11:26:07 PM
Quote from: Supermarine Troutfire on 15 January, 2013, 10:26:08 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 09:20:04 PM
Quote from: Supermarine Troutfire on 15 January, 2013, 09:17:55 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 15 January, 2013, 06:30:16 PM
We have a new manager at work. This morning he rounded us up for a daily pep-talk and used phrases like "touch base". Ugh. :-/

Did he say "going forward"? That's the new phrase they're all using. I used to ignore that sort of thing but recently I was promoted to management myself, which means I can tell people to fuck off when they say stupid things.

......yes. Yes he did.  :-/

What a wanker!

Pfft, You all need to "think outside the box" so we can "raise the bar" and "slice and dice" the facts to find out if "we're all singing from the same hymn sheet".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 16 January, 2013, 07:52:33 AM
Sooner or later, one of them is going to say "Thinking outwith the box", and then I shall kill.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 16 January, 2013, 01:03:24 PM
Heh, had a bit of a run in with him this morning. Every time I went to answer him, he put his hand up to shoosh me. I said "look, we can either have a conversation, or you can just carry on talking AT me." He carried on talking at me. It's going to be lots of fun working with this prat.  :/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 16 January, 2013, 01:16:19 PM
You may find it more fun if you print out bullshit bingo cards and see which of your team gets there first...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 16 January, 2013, 10:34:51 PM
Going forward? Have we recently invented a time macine? No, in which case, in which other direction did you think we could do them?


Watch out for " in the <insert noun> space".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 18 January, 2013, 12:29:13 PM
I was at a meeting recently where someone was asked to "capture the information going forward." Which meant they had to take the minutes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 18 January, 2013, 12:38:07 PM
I hear that one all the time, Colin. Absolute nonsense.  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 19 January, 2013, 08:24:13 AM
Until recently I used to work with a real bell-end of a management drone who would take great delight in using the full range of corporate wank-words at any opportunity, he seemed to pick up a new one every week but would nearly always use them out of context.

A couple of colleagues and I set out to try and install the phrase "Boston Steamer" into his vocabulary by using it in a positive way whenever we spoke to him in the hope that he will use it in a meeting or something.

Sadly I left the job before I could enjoy the fruits of our labour.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 19 January, 2013, 10:53:04 AM
I can NEVER find a clean spoon when I need one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 19 January, 2013, 08:15:16 PM
Despite making it through xmas largely cold free (i did catch a sniffle, but it dint really come to owt), ive have now caught a bit of a stinker.
Dang. And Dang again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 January, 2013, 03:04:13 AM
Drokk! I've woken up after 3 hours sleep and feel refreshed. I don't know what to do!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 20 January, 2013, 02:05:00 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 January, 2013, 03:04:13 AM
Drokk! I've woken up after 3 hours sleep and feel refreshed. I don't know what to do!

You could do some of my marking for me.  I'm drowning under student submissions.   :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 January, 2013, 08:04:05 PM
Sorry! I watched telly instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 January, 2013, 06:27:21 PM
I'm at the airport and delayed by an hour and ten minutes. And you only get thirty minutes free Wi-Fi.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 25 January, 2013, 06:33:56 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 25 January, 2013, 06:27:21 PM
I'm at the airport and delayed by an hour and ten minutes. And you only get thirty minutes free Wi-Fi.

I am too for the past 2 hours, but have just (ingeniously) used friends mobile numbers to start a new free 30 min cycle if necessary.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 27 January, 2013, 11:51:37 AM
We've problem with the plumbing today so there's no water until it's fixed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: House of Usher on 27 January, 2013, 12:27:56 PM
I really hate 'going forward.' I much prefer 'from now on,' which is plainer English.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 30 January, 2013, 03:55:13 PM
I just had a packet of crispy bacon wheat crunchies.

There were precisely twelve crisps in the packet.

What kind of horseshit are they trying to pull here?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 30 January, 2013, 04:09:10 PM
They were Wheat Credit-Crunchies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 30 January, 2013, 04:56:19 PM
Because my right eye's has gone a bit gammy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 30 January, 2013, 04:57:03 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 27 January, 2013, 12:27:56 PM
I really hate 'going forward.' I much prefer 'from now on,' which is plainer English.
Henceforth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 30 January, 2013, 04:57:21 PM
Quote from: JamesC on 30 January, 2013, 04:09:10 PM
They were Wheat Credit-Crunchies.

:lol: Bravo, sir.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 02 February, 2013, 08:12:13 PM
For the past three days, I have received the exact same junk mail, a flyer for specsavers (I don't wear glasses), an offer for cheap internets (from the provider I already use, from whom I'm getting a cheaper price than the offer on the leaflet), a gas supplier (same situation as the internet) and a mini catalogue of Eurospar offers (there isn't a Eurospar 'round here for miles). The same fucking unnecessary fucking wastes of fucking paper, every fucking day for three fucking days. The fucking environment is fucked so it is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 02 February, 2013, 09:26:53 PM
we was really looking forward to a chinese tonight so went on just eat and booked one at 6.30 with our slot for 7.25   we then waited and waited and then i rang them up and i swear the place must be doubling as a taxi rank as i got the "it on its way" she then hung up as i was still taliking at 8.15 the wife rang she being more patient than i and was told it would be another 15-20 minutes!!!! it would have been quicker to walk down and queue so we had bacon butties instead  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 February, 2013, 09:50:56 PM
Quote from: El Pops on 02 February, 2013, 08:12:13 PM
For the past three days, I have received the exact same junk mail, a flyer for specsavers (I don't wear glasses), an offer for cheap internets (from the provider I already use, from whom I'm getting a cheaper price than the offer on the leaflet), a gas supplier (same situation as the internet) and a mini catalogue of Eurospar offers (there isn't a Eurospar 'round here for miles). The same fucking unnecessary fucking wastes of fucking paper, every fucking day for three fucking days. The fucking environment is fucked so it is.

Having recently left the mailing sector of the print industry I can assure you that the environment is the least fucked of the two sides  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 02 February, 2013, 11:23:42 PM
I made the mistake of listening to a double glazing salesman (Safestyle ) in early December and although he never got in the door and i told him that if we were interested we would let them know they have been on the phone every other week. Things came to a head today when i told them that if i ever was going to get new windows they'd be the last bastards i call and if they phoned again i would be reporting them to trading standards.

They couldn't apologise enough after that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 February, 2013, 11:55:26 AM
I'm sat up Samuels school at the moment with Caz. We're up for nothing bad, it's one of those progress and where we'd like to see him heading over the next few terms thingies (Caz knows the official name). So that's me up extremely early for this and Caz has taken time off from work. We arrived 15 minutes early to make sure we didn't get held up in traffic. Bang on 11:30 when the meeting is due a call to reception informs us that the meeting is put back 30 minutes. Drokkin' typical
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 04 February, 2013, 01:12:26 PM
This thread was started for entertainment, not for complaining. Its early posts were ironic.

Ironically, this annoys me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 February, 2013, 01:24:20 PM
I always thought it was things that genuinely annoyed you a little even though you knew they really weren't worth bothering about. Turns out I've been misunderstanding for three and a half years. Which feels like a minor impediment to me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 04 February, 2013, 01:53:15 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 04 February, 2013, 01:24:20 PM
I always thought it was things that genuinely annoyed you a little even though you knew they really weren't worth bothering about. Turns out I've been misunderstanding for three and a half years. Which feels like a minor impediment to me.

It is ironic that you are still doing it wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 04 February, 2013, 02:39:03 PM
One of the sprogs in the locality of the community centre where I work, is seriously cruising for a bruising. He seems to get great enjoyment out of whacking his football off the walls of the building and he's come close to putting in the windows of the front door on several occasions. Quite aside from the noise nuisance that he's causing, we are a non-profit service for the community and simply don't have the €300 to spare that it would cost to replace any broken panes.

I've tried explaining this to him as firmly but politely as I can without coming across as the curmudgeonly, middle-aged, kid-free bachelor that I am, but it's made no difference. The little bastard not only doesn't give a shit, he actually takes pleasure in being a nasty, ignorant prick. He's about ten years old so he should definitely know better.

Not sure what I should do now, as trying to be nice and conciliatory clearly hasn't worked.

Where's Dredd when you need him, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 04 February, 2013, 03:58:54 PM
go round his house and put his windows in.

OR more seriously, if he deliberately causes damage that his parents won't pay for when he's been repeatedly told, ban him or threaten to report him to the police for criminal damage. Services must be initially available to all, but if he constantly pisses on that oportunity, you must protect the service for the benefit of other users.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 04 February, 2013, 08:22:26 PM
Paddykafka, is there a community police service where you are based?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 04 February, 2013, 09:54:00 PM
Isn't this the area that the police said they were going to clamp down on last year, due to the untold misery that it causes!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 05 February, 2013, 05:48:37 PM
Having finished work at 4pm, I decided to top my oil up before driving home (some eagle-eyed readers may recall I work forty miles away from home). The oil cap fell into the darkest recesses of the engine and I've been unable to retrieve it. I'm still here, an hour and a half later. Looks like I live in Manchester now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 05 February, 2013, 08:00:45 PM
dan dont dare'll let you move in then you can post the humurous goings on like a northern two and a half men
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 February, 2013, 09:07:32 PM
haha - but who's the half?

If you are genuinely stuck in Manchester you could certainly crash here, I'm close to the city centre
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 05 February, 2013, 10:54:27 PM
Cheers DDD. Finally made it home, after dragging my girlfriend all the way to darkest Didsbury so she could be Mrs Huhne and call out the RAC. They had to open the bumper up to get the oil cap out - no way I'd have managed that on my tod and tool-less!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 February, 2013, 07:25:54 PM
Mrs Tips has buggered off to Belgium for five days. She's accidentally taken my 3DS charger with her.

So I'm not getting a shag until Monday, but worse I can't play Resident Evil.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 07 February, 2013, 08:06:48 PM
If you hang around an amusement arcade for long enough, you'll probably get one or the other...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 February, 2013, 09:35:52 PM
Why does Apple insist on making every iteration of iTunes more clumsy and infuriating than the last?

All I want to do is quickly and easily drag and drop individual podcasts and music tracks to my iPhone. i used to be able to do this just fine but sadly it seems to become more difficult with each update to the point where it seems to be beyond the capabilities of iTunes 11. No, Apple seem to be ever more aggressively trying to force me to instead 'sync' all my content across various devices. Why in the name of fuckery would I want to do that? I have infinitely more content in my iTunes library than can physically fit on my iPhone!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 14 February, 2013, 11:55:46 AM
Apparently, I don't get a Valentine's Day card now we're married. ~harumph!~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 February, 2013, 12:54:28 PM
Quote from: Banners on 14 February, 2013, 11:55:46 AM
Apparently, I don't get a Valentine's Day card now we're married. ~harumph!~

That's not all you don't get any more mate.   

In an effort to improve my own odds in that department, I set about making a Tiramasu* for our Valentine's meal (aka something to soak up the wine while watching Breaking Bad, ah true love), but despite my best efforts, I don't think the folded-in-egg-white had the desired en-fluffening effect.  It's too late now for this round, but is anyone any good at that bit?  I whisked the egg whites until they were peaked, and folded them v-e-r-y gently into the cheese mix, but by the time I'd ladled the combined goop on to the sponge it had all the lightness of polyfilla.  Should I have keep whisking the eggs longer?  Should I just have dolloped the two bits together?  Damnit, I despair of the dessert station - any dish you can't fix by adding cumin and pepper is beyond me. 

Wait, this is the Threadjacking thread, isn't it?



*had one as our wedding cake, I'm well romantic me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 14 February, 2013, 01:48:16 PM
had an interview for a promotion at work today. Wasn't really expecting to get the job and have now found out that i didn't. Hopefully the date i'm on tonight will go a bit better, although the fact that I managed to arrange it for Valentine's day without realising isn't really the best possible start.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 14 February, 2013, 05:53:48 PM
Any boarders from the South Yorks/Humber region will know that the line from Sheff to Megs is always been plagued with some kind of minor woe that grinds travel to a halt, but it looks like theyve an excuse this time...

(http://i.imgur.com/TZVIozw.jpg)

Normal service may not be ressumed for a while.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 14 February, 2013, 11:16:26 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 14 February, 2013, 05:53:48 PM
Any boarders from the South Yorks/Humber region will know that the line from Sheff to Megs is always been plagued with some kind of minor woe that grinds travel to a halt, but it looks like theyve an excuse this time...

(http://i.imgur.com/TZVIozw.jpg)

Normal service may not be ressumed for a while.

I can't wait for the Hornby/Aurora AFX crossover set for recreating this!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 15 February, 2013, 11:03:56 AM
Went to an Italian restaurant for Valentine's Day.
Italian food is overrated and I don't like restaurants (except Indians). If I want another drink I want it straight away, not 10 minutes later when I've managed to get the waiter's attention. Everything in restaurants is to serve the restaurant's convenience rather than the customers and everything goes at their pace.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 15 February, 2013, 02:45:13 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 14 February, 2013, 12:54:28 PM
Quote from: Banners on 14 February, 2013, 11:55:46 AM
Apparently, I don't get a Valentine's Day card now we're married. ~harumph!~

That's not all you don't get any more mate.   

Confirmed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 15 February, 2013, 03:49:15 PM
The hamster that runs my wheel seems to be asleep since I seem to making nothing but stupid, small mstakes today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 18 February, 2013, 09:20:39 PM
cos its my week off and i'm decorating the little uns bedroom only the "one coat" lilac paint doesnt like the previos lemon scheme and ive had to go over it... i am supposed to be building ikea stuff as well but i cant be arsed as long as the painting is slapdashed done and the room is reasonably tidy i'll postpone the rest...and the wife is having a lumbar puncture on thursday so i'll be busy looking afetr her as well,busy busy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 05:56:38 AM
Ugh. I'm in America, suffering from SEVERE jet lag and disorientation. Ive never travelled outside of Europe before and really wasnt prepared for it at all. Suffering from crazy mood swings, anxiety, despair, homesickness, fatigue, loss of appetite, even an upset stomach.

I was really looking forward to the visit, but i feel like I'm having some sort of allergic reaction to the place and kind of just wish I was at home right now. And I'm stuck here for the next ten days!

My girlfriend is dealing with it the same as me, if not worse.

I really hope our negative attitude is just a result of the jet lag...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: blackmocco on 20 February, 2013, 06:20:41 AM
It's jet-lag, Radiator. Give it a chance. Your body's freaking out because your time-zones are all fucked up. Happens to me every time I go home to Dublin and then every time I come back here to LA. Seems to get worse as I get older too, sadly. You'll be alright. America is completely overwhelming on a first visit. Where are you in the US?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 06:59:03 AM
Portland, Oregon.

I'm pretty staggered by how culture-shocked I feel, having always assumed I'd fit right in here being so familiar with the language and culture and all that. I grew up in awe of America, and now I'm experiencing it for real it's really quite disconcerting how alien and weird it all feels. I never thought in a million years my initial reaction would be one of mild revulsion and the urge to leave and go home.

It's hard to describe, but everything feels a bit off, a bit unreal. The streets are wide but largely deserted, in a slightly unsettling 28 Days Later kind of way. The buildings are huge but I'm beginning to suspect they're all made of MDF and hollow inside. There are a million little things, really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: blackmocco on 20 February, 2013, 02:49:05 PM
You'd probably have felt more at home, weirdly enough, in one of the bigger cities like LA, San Francisco or New York. I hear Portland's beautiful. Haven't been yet. This'll pass. American culture is a lot different than what we're used to and the first order of business is that everything's much bigger so people drive everywhere. Takes a bit of getting used to. Are you actually in the city or are you a bit out...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 04:06:40 PM
In the city, about a ten minute walk from downtown. I don't know if I'd describe it as beautiful tbh, the surrounding landscape maybe. I'm going to try and explore some of the trendier neighbourhoods today because so far I've seen very, very little to justify the city's reputation as being this hip and alternative idyll.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 20 February, 2013, 04:13:40 PM
Why're you there in particular if I may ask, Rad?

It's an interesting place to single out if there isn't a familial reason. I've heard a lot about Portland from TV shows and whatnot but obviously no place is like it's depicted on that glowing thing. Like, for example Baltimore is probably quite charming.

Now if Treme is to be believed New Orleans is a sparkly, violent, cynical and magical type of place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 04:41:03 PM
We're supposed to be moving here for work in the summer, and we came here to check it out, but now we're starting to desperately back-pedal on that idea.

I've actually always wanted to visit Portland though as I've long been interested in the alternative scene and people seem to really love the city. Plus I like rain, coffee, beer and indie music which the city is famous for. The fact that its a hours drive from both mountains and coast is also a massive bonus.

I really wasn't expecting it turn out to be a slightly depressing ghost town, but that's exactly what it feels like, especially compared to East London, which genuinely is vibrant and bustling and trendy. As I said, we're checking out some of the trendier parts and surrounding areas the next few days, but they're going to have to be pretty damn spectacular to win us round now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 20 February, 2013, 05:29:29 PM
Quote from: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 04:41:03 PM
Plus I like rain, coffee, beer and indie music which the city is famous for.

Oddly enough I recently met a chap from Seattle who claimed that his city was famous for exactly the same reasons :O
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 20 February, 2013, 05:33:44 PM
Quote from: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 06:59:03 AM
It's hard to describe, but everything feels a bit off, a bit unreal. The streets are wide but largely deserted, in a slightly unsettling 28 Days Later kind of way. The buildings are huge but I'm beginning to suspect they're all made of MDF and hollow inside. There are a million little things, really.

That's exactly how I've felt every time I've been to America. Whole place seems like a semi-abandoned industrial estate!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 20 February, 2013, 05:49:40 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 20 February, 2013, 05:33:44 PM
That's exactly how I've felt every time I've been to America. Whole place seems like a semi-abandoned industrial estate!

My brother spent months riding greyhound buses around America and said that long stretches of his trip - especially in The South - felt like touring a third world nation, which made for a profoundly depressing experience. He also hooked up with a former stripper, whose previous employment was in a joint called BAZOOKAS, and gave the free all-you-can-eat buffets in Las Vegas a run for their money. Swings and roundabouts, I suppose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 05:53:55 PM
Ha, yeah.

What's weird is that there are plenty of wrong 'uns in London, but as it's always so busy you don't really notice them or feel threatened, but here, if you encounter a dodgy type in the street it feels quite threatening because there's usually not many other people around.

That and the possibility that they might have a gun of course.

I'm also really staggered by the inequality on show. Extravagant wealth living literally a block or two away from real poverty and deprivation. I know London can be a bit like that but in my personal experience it usually looks a lot worse than it is, and even 'poor' or 'rough' areas are generally very culturally and socially diverse. Here it seems almost segregated - poor areas are just cut off and no one goes there if they can avoid it.

I'm sorry to the US boarders, I don't mean to disrespect, I'm sure there are a lot of great qualities too. Just being honest about my first impressions, and they are just that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: blackmocco on 21 February, 2013, 03:31:46 PM
Ha! When I first moved to the US, I spent eleven months in Phoenix, AZ. The biggest shithole I've ever been to. If anything, it helped me out with living somewhere else because wherever else I lived, it couldn't be as utterly shite as Phoenix was. LA's way more my scene but even then, it's not always obvious entertainment. You do have to scratch the surface a little to find the things you like.

What everyone needs to understand about the US is that people's entertainment here isn't localized like it is back home. People have no problem driving big distances just for a night out and rarely stay in just one place even then. I've always found it quite maddening myself.

Unfortunately Radiator, I think you've been a little misinformed about Portland. Portland's a pretty quiet city and it's a place people tend to move to when they want to get away from noisy big cities like Los Angeles or San Francisco.

I would say come back for the summer by all means. Just go to a different city. You'll have a far different experience.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 February, 2013, 04:15:46 PM
We've explored a bit more of the city now, including the upmarket and shabby/trendy districts, and though these areas are really nice (and are much more of what I thought it would be like here) they represent tiny pockets of civilisation in what is mostly quite a drab place, and the roving packs of homeless people and crackheads (of which there are many) kind of take the shine off the nice parts tbh.

To clarify, I knew Portland wouldn't be as vibrant as London, I knew it would be much smaller. But I did think it would be a lot nicer!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 25 February, 2013, 12:29:11 PM



...cos i spent last night in a & e thinking i was having a heart attack but lucily im not, hearts fine so's i can carry on abusing it and i dont haqve a blood clot in my lung so apart from the white hot pain keeping me awakes im fine! yay!








...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 25 February, 2013, 12:35:19 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 25 February, 2013, 12:29:11 PM



...cos i spent last night in a & e thinking i was having a heart attack but lucily im not, hearts fine so's i can carry on abusing it and i dont haqve a blood clot in my lung so apart from the white hot pain keeping me awakes im fine! yay!








...

Jeez Mogzilla...hardly one for the '...minor impediments' thread.
Get well soon dude.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 25 February, 2013, 01:19:30 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 25 February, 2013, 12:29:11 PM...cos i spent last night in a & e thinking i was having a heart attack but lucily im not, hearts fine so's i can carry on abusing it and i dont haqve a blood clot in my lung so apart from the white hot pain keeping me awakes im fine! yay!

Bloody hell Mogzilla glad you're okay :O Frustrating to be told "it's nowt go away and suffer" but surely much better than actually having a buggered heart - !
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 25 February, 2013, 02:19:55 PM
Scary stuff mogz. Be well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 25 February, 2013, 02:37:05 PM
'kin 'ell Mogz they tell you what was up with you before they sent you packin? I thought I was having a heart attack once, it was pleurisy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 25 February, 2013, 02:45:26 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 25 February, 2013, 12:29:11 PM...cos i spent last night in a & e thinking i was having a heart attack but lucily im not, hearts fine so's i can carry on abusing it and i dont haqve a blood clot in my lung so apart from the white hot pain keeping me awakes im fine! yay!

Scarey shit, Mogz.  Stay well.

If it helps, I don't think your doctors are being callous or anything, it's just that stomach problems from acid reflux to stress pains can cause pain all over the body that borders on unreal, and they're hard to call because there's technically not anything wrong with you as it's just the body doing what it does normally,  only turned up to 11.  A mate had symptoms that mirrored a heart attack but it was just trapped wind - it might feel like hell but you should try to relax if you can.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 February, 2013, 03:31:41 PM
This thread got dark. Hope you get well Mogz.  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 25 February, 2013, 05:40:19 PM
Aye take it easy, and get well soon Fella.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 February, 2013, 09:36:29 AM
Quote from: radiator on 20 February, 2013, 06:59:03 AM
I'm pretty staggered by how culture-shocked I feel, having always assumed I'd fit right in here being so familiar with the language and culture and all that. I grew up in awe of America, and now I'm experiencing it for real it's really quite disconcerting how alien and weird it all feels.

Fascinated to hear that Radiator, I've only been in the States once myself, and that was almost exactly my reaction.  Part of it was definitely jet-lag (my mother, a seasoned traveler from visiting family spread all over the globe, denies its existence when 'going the right way', but urrgh) which I found very unsettling, but part of it was genuine culture-shock - from expecting the familiar but finding the alien. I did end up thoroughly enjoying my travels there, and became very well-disposed to the polite, friendly and overwhelmingly helpful people Americans turned out to be, but the initial impression was... weird.  I'm no globetrotter myself, but I've traveled a fair bit in Europe since, as far as Turkey, Slovenia and Hungary, and the US was by far the most foreign place I've been.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 26 February, 2013, 04:45:54 PM
Hope you are on the mend, Mogzilla.

Regarding the discussion about the US – quite the opposite experience for me. I've been there three times (on all occasions to Washington DC and NYC). I felt completely at home in New York which in many ways I found similar to London in terms of the hustle and bustle, the mix of people, the variation from area to area. It had a familiarity about it, no doubt due to having spent my life exposed to so many US films and tv programmes. It felt surprisingly European and is one of the few places I've been to where I have felt that I could live. No doubt a totally different vibe though in smaller towns or perhaps more inland.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 February, 2013, 05:11:02 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 25 February, 2013, 12:29:11 PM
...cos i spent last night in a & e thinking i was having a heart attack but lucily im not, hearts fine so's i can carry on abusing it and i dont haqve a blood clot in my lung so apart from the white hot pain keeping me awakes im fine! yay!

Missed your post completely Mogz - that sounds like a f'ing ghastly experience.  Hope you are recovering.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 26 February, 2013, 05:25:41 PM
thanks all, doing well its gone from full scary to twinge and i cant sleep on my left side at the moment but i can go back to wqork tomoz
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 26 February, 2013, 07:44:35 PM
Be well Mogzilla. Bit of a shock. Still it put my would be rant about being held up in traffic into perspective.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 26 February, 2013, 08:13:55 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 26 February, 2013, 05:25:41 PM
thanks all, doing well its gone from full scary to twinge and i cant sleep on my left side at the moment but i can go back to wqork tomoz

This may sound silly mogz, but be sure to drink lots of water, 1 - 2 litres a day, and see if that helps. Sometimes dehydration of the heart/lung area can feel like a heart attack/angina.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 February, 2013, 09:17:05 AM
My landline is out so no home internet - I can catch up at work, but I can't see most of the pictures - boo! Apparently BT are "on the case", but Grud knows what that actually means.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 28 February, 2013, 10:48:00 AM
No pictures? And I am about to turn the calendar over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 28 February, 2013, 11:20:41 AM
Moving house is a bitch
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SKD on 28 February, 2013, 07:22:53 PM
 Computer keeps freezing or display driver stops working. >:( We also have mice in the walls/floor, we have 'caught' three already and found another one dead in the bedroom.

Stew.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 February, 2013, 09:33:14 PM
Quote from: SKD on 28 February, 2013, 07:22:53 PM
We also have mice in the walls/floor, we have 'caught' three already and found another one dead in the bedroom.

Stew.

Rest assured SKD, there are more of the little shits.
'In the walls' is a call the professionals moment I think!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 28 February, 2013, 09:33:14 PM
Quote from: SKD on 28 February, 2013, 07:22:53 PM
We also have mice in the walls/floor, we have 'caught' three already and found another one dead in the bedroom.

Stew.

Rest assured SKD, there are more of the little shits.
'In the walls' is a call the professionals moment I think!

Saw a way of using mouse paper that doesn't end up with you having to stove the caught mouse's head in afterwards if yer one ah they peacenik do-gooders. You drizzle some olive oil on their trapped legs and wait patiently while they work themselves free. It's that or the breakbacks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 February, 2013, 09:58:40 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM

Saw

Fan of that movie, eh Judda?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 10:04:58 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 28 February, 2013, 09:58:40 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM

Saw

Fan of that movie, eh Judda

For a moment I thought I'd posted in threadjacking to elicit that response, then I realised my post was unintentionally grim. In retrospect I'd suggest Rodentine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 10:06:21 PM
Can't say I'm a fan of Saw either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 February, 2013, 10:19:11 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 10:04:58 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 28 February, 2013, 09:58:40 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM

Saw

Fan of that movie, eh Judda

For a moment I thought I'd posted in threadjacking to elicit that response, then I realised my post was unintentionally grim. In retrospect I'd suggest Rodentine.

Ha, and I really thought you were messin too! :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 10:38:58 PM
Heh, no I was being serious.  :o I saw a big rat using olive oil to free himself from mouse paper. Also if you put a bowl down with some way for the mice to get in and coat the bowl in olive oil they fall in and can't get out. You should release them over a mile away apparently as they're bastards for finding their way back (back of the lane won't cut it).
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 February, 2013, 11:35:01 PM
I've just managed to break my recently constructed HTPC by not paying enough attention whilst installing a quieter CPU fan. Now I need to buy a 2nd hand motherboard.  Bum...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 28 February, 2013, 11:57:01 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM
Saw a way of using mouse paper that doesn't end up with you having to stove the caught mouse's head in afterwards if yer one ah they peacenik do-gooders.

If you've ever had to listen to a mouse smother itself to death in mouse paper, you'd know it's not just hippies that don't want to use that shit.  It's horrific, and they can take hours to die, terrified and screaming the whole time.
Let nature take its course and borrow a mate's moggy or a small dog - most of the smaller breeds have ratting hardwired.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:53:30 AM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 28 February, 2013, 11:57:01 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM
Saw a way of using mouse paper that doesn't end up with you having to stove the caught mouse's head in afterwards if yer one ah they peacenik do-gooders.

If you've ever had to listen to a mouse smother itself to death in mouse paper, you'd know it's not just hippies that don't want to use that shit.  It's horrific, and they can take hours to die, terrified and screaming the whole time.
Let nature take its course and borrow a mate's moggy or a small dog - most of the smaller breeds have ratting hardwired.

Just incase anyone gets it twisted I'm all about humane and non lethal ways to get shot of the buggers. I pointed out a way you can free rodents from mouse paper. Also dogs are infinitely quicker at dispatching rodents than cats if you go that route.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 March, 2013, 09:49:42 AM
Quote from: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:53:30 AM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 28 February, 2013, 11:57:01 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 28 February, 2013, 09:54:12 PM
Saw a way of using mouse paper that doesn't end up with you having to stove the caught mouse's head in afterwards if yer one ah they peacenik do-gooders.

If you've ever had to listen to a mouse smother itself to death in mouse paper, you'd know it's not just hippies that don't want to use that shit.  It's horrific, and they can take hours to die, terrified and screaming the whole time.
Let nature take its course and borrow a mate's moggy or a small dog - most of the smaller breeds have ratting hardwired.

Just incase anyone gets it twisted I'm all about humane and non lethal ways to get shot of the buggers. I pointed out a way you can free rodents from mouse paper. Also dogs are infinitely quicker at dispatching rodents than cats if you go that route.
I dispise Mouse paper. Horrible, inhumane way to kill other life. My cat's at least dispatch with them quickly and (comparatively) painlessly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 March, 2013, 10:00:56 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 01 March, 2013, 09:49:42 AMMy cat's at least dispatch with them quickly and (comparatively) painlessly.

I think you have discovered a new species of cat!  All the ones I've ever served have been torturers the Vatican would be proud of.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 March, 2013, 10:55:00 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 March, 2013, 10:00:56 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 01 March, 2013, 09:49:42 AMMy cat's at least dispatch with them quickly and (comparatively) painlessly.

I think you have discovered a new species of cat!  All the ones I've ever served have been torturers the Vatican would be proud of.
Mine quite litteraly lunge on the and snap down on the things neck with there mouth. Never miss, dead before they even realise they where hunted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 March, 2013, 11:23:02 AM
Not to go all Bradley Manning here, but I'm afraid all mine are of the catch-maul-release-wait-wait-chase-catch-maul-release-wait-wait-chase... until we manage to get to in between and put out/out of its misery.  Can you hear it, Clarice, the screaming of the mice?  Happily all my surviving cats are now too aged and lacking-of-limb to torment much more than spiders, and those guys are no saints themselves.  Although there is a feisty wee ginger that I have my eye on that might skew the demographic back towards regular rodent waterboarding...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 01 March, 2013, 11:51:23 AM
Quote from: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:53:30 AMJust incase anyone gets it twisted I'm all about humane and non lethal ways to get shot of the buggers. I pointed out a way you can free rodents from mouse paper.

I wasn't implying anything, JF, I was just chipping in that it's not just stinky hippies like us who despise mouse paper.

Also, the most inhumane way to kill rodents is BY DEATH GUARD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCzckeou9Os
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 01 March, 2013, 11:57:42 AM
Two phonecalls in the space of five minutes

Call 1
Is that Mr Burdis?
Yes!
Can we ask you a few questions?
Yes!
Are you in your 40's?
Yes!
Would that be early or late?
Mid!
Was that 30?
No, mid 40's!
What is your first name?
John!
Does that begin with a C?
CALL TERMINATED

Call 2
Can I speak to Mr Burdis?
Speaking!
Is that Mrs Burdis?
Do I sound like a woman?
CALL TERMINATED
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 March, 2013, 11:58:10 AM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 01 March, 2013, 11:51:23 AM
Also, the most inhumane way to kill rodents is BY DEATH GUARD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCzckeou9Os

There's nothing inhumane about Tanya Roberts' thighs in that clip (they can crush my rodent any etc.), but it is a Minor Impediment that I didn't grow up to marry her.  Gordon Bennett that's a pair of pins... I think it's time for a re-watch of Beastmaster.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:00:36 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 01 March, 2013, 11:51:23 AM
Quote from: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:53:30 AMJust incase anyone gets it twisted I'm all about humane and non lethal ways to get shot of the buggers. I pointed out a way you can free rodents from mouse paper.

I wasn't implying anything, JF, I was just chipping in that it's not just stinky hippies like us who despise mouse paper.

Also, the most inhumane way to kill rodents is BY DEATH GUARD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCzckeou9Os

No worries Prof, was just making sure no one thought I was an absolute [spoiler]cunt[/spoiler]  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 01 March, 2013, 12:08:03 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:00:36 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 01 March, 2013, 11:51:23 AM
Quote from: judda fett on 01 March, 2013, 12:53:30 AMJust incase anyone gets it twisted I'm all about humane and non lethal ways to get shot of the buggers. I pointed out a way you can free rodents from mouse paper.

I wasn't implying anything, JF, I was just chipping in that it's not just stinky hippies like us who despise mouse paper.

Also, the most inhumane way to kill rodents is BY DEATH GUARD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCzckeou9Os

No worries Prof, was just making sure no one thought I was an absolute [spoiler]cunt[/spoiler]  ;)

Don't worry - we know there are no absolutes...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SKD on 01 March, 2013, 08:54:39 PM
 Thanks for the advice guys. My neighbours cat would leave the mutilated remains of her prey on the crisp, clean white sheets of their double bed, this is after playing catch on their lovely cream carpet. My big worry here is the mice getting at the 40 years worth of comics I have in the spare room, so I've gone down the 'Little Nipper' route. Not ideal I know, but...

Stew.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 March, 2013, 09:26:09 AM
£22 for two tickets to Wreck-It Ralph last night! Blimey.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 02 March, 2013, 11:41:41 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 March, 2013, 11:23:02 AM
Not to go all Bradley Manning here, but I'm afraid all mine are of the catch-maul-release-wait-wait-chase-catch-maul-release-wait-wait-chase...

Heh. We used to have a sweet natured Perian/Tortoiseshell cross called Lizzie. Sweet natured except where small animals were concerned. She used to do the pounce release thing. She'd actually periodically look in a different direction too, like: "Hey look! My attention is elsewhere! I can't see you...." Mouse runs. POUNCE. Repeat, etc.

She'd have a go at our dog too. Mind you as a puppy he used to grab her by the head and pull her* around so it's understandable that she'd plant one on his nose. He learned to protect his nose by backing into her presenting his hind quarters as a shield before spinning round and making a lunge at her. Such a comical thing to see.

She was the dominant one out of that pair though, even when he grew to five times her size. It wasn't all aggression though they'd often share her bed and she'd clean him. Until he moved then the lick could turn into a nip... Little bully.

*It was play for his point of view and they never hurt each other badly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 07 March, 2013, 06:46:14 PM
my daughter's dog (see pets thread) has eaten some hubba bubba -the sugar filled kind one day something will kill him he once ate a tube of teething gel
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 07 March, 2013, 06:58:58 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 07 March, 2013, 06:46:14 PM
my daughter's dog (see pets thread) has eaten some hubba bubba

Please tell me it blew a bubble out its arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 09 March, 2013, 11:08:56 AM
The old faithful rust bucket has conspired against me and failed on 5 points of its MOT. Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 09 March, 2013, 04:05:48 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 09 March, 2013, 11:08:56 AM
The old faithful rust bucket has conspired against me and failed on 5 points of its MOT. Bugger.

Crap news Iain...if only you hadn't spent all that car service cash on pieces of paper! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 11 March, 2013, 01:58:33 PM
The skin of my hard-boiled egg is stuck to the white, making it very difficult to peel off the shell, while maintaining the structural integrity of the tasty morsel inside.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 11 March, 2013, 02:06:18 PM
Quote from: El Pops on 11 March, 2013, 01:58:33 PM
The skin of my hard-boiled egg is stuck to the white, making it very difficult to peel off the shell, while maintaining the structural integrity of the tasty morsel inside.

You need to plunge the egg into an ice bath for a minute as soon as you stop boiling it. This creates a layer of steam between the white 'skin' and the egg and should peel quite easily. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 13 March, 2013, 07:51:31 PM
   went to get my back and sides trimmed ,and told the girl do not touch the top at all!!! or front however she finished the back then before i knew what ws happening cut two inches off the front !!! i asked her what she thought she was doing but got a blank look i'd been trying to grow my hair out on top for a while following a recent bout of stress and now look like ive been scalped i refused to pay and walked out the owner,a dodgy bloke with gol teeth followed me and tried to get me back in the shop to "sort " it out i refused telling him i had been butchered basically he then started threatening me!!! so i told him i'd call the police and i walked away to a string of abuse then found a proper barber who fixed the long bit at the back shed totally missed for free! i'll be using him next time (well, in a few weeks when my hair has grown back...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 March, 2013, 08:09:25 PM
Perfect clear night, tiniest 2-day old moon, went out to look for PanSTARRS.  Could I find it?  Could I feck - couldn't see a single star in Pisces, never mind a Magnitude 2 comet.  When I'm Dictator for Life I will ban street lights outright.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 13 March, 2013, 10:16:02 PM
In so many ways, in so many things, I just feel thwarted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 March, 2013, 08:33:23 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 March, 2013, 08:09:25 PM
Perfect clear night, tiniest 2-day old moon, went out to look for PanSTARRS.  Could I find it?  Could I feck - couldn't see a single star in Pisces, never mind a Magnitude 2 comet.  When I'm Dictator for Life I will ban street lights outright.
This. Seriously, a good black out is what we need. As soon as people realise how beautiful the night sky can be maybe we'll all actualy agree on something for once.  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 14 March, 2013, 08:36:44 PM
Mrs Albion went home at lunchtime and there was a letter for her saying that Churchill Insurance wanted £4300 within the next 14 days or they would take court action against her.

She was in an accident 9 months ago. The other car was insured by Churchill, we are not.
Churchill say that they haven't received the money from our insurer so they sent this letter to us. Arseholes.

I called our insurer, I'm the policy holder, Mrs Albion is a named driver. They say they are disputing some costs that Churchill want but it's nothing to do with us and they will handle it. Churchill are just trying it on and it's a load of hot air apparently.

Not happy about them causing us stress and worry over something that is between them and not us.   >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 14 March, 2013, 08:54:18 PM
Quote from: Albion on 14 March, 2013, 08:36:44 PM
Mrs Albion went home at lunchtime and there was a letter for her saying that Churchill Insurance wanted £4300 within the next 14 days or they would take court action against her.

She was in an accident 9 months ago. The other car was insured by Churchill, we are not.
Churchill say that they haven't received the money from our insurer so they sent this letter to us. Arseholes.

I called our insurer, I'm the policy holder, Mrs Albion is a named driver. They say they are disputing some costs that Churchill want but it's nothing to do with us and they will handle it. Churchill are just trying it on and it's a load of hot air apparently.

Not happy about them causing us stress and worry over something that is between them and not us.   >:(

Complain to the Insurance Ombudsman.

http://www.financial-ombudsman.org.uk/publications/technical_notes/motor-insurance.html (http://www.financial-ombudsman.org.uk/publications/technical_notes/motor-insurance.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 14 March, 2013, 08:57:37 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 14 March, 2013, 08:54:18 PM
Complain to the Insurance Ombudsman.

http://www.financial-ombudsman.org.uk/publications/technical_notes/motor-insurance.html (http://www.financial-ombudsman.org.uk/publications/technical_notes/motor-insurance.html)

I've just been looking into it and may well do so very soon. Churchill claimed it was a standard letter to get us to contact our insurer. If they have a problem why don't they sort it out instead of dragging us in to do their work? Fools.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 14 March, 2013, 09:13:10 PM
Be sure to bill them for your time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 14 March, 2013, 09:23:36 PM
Quote from: Albion on 14 March, 2013, 08:36:44 PM
Mrs Albion went home at lunchtime and there was a letter for her saying that Churchill Insurance wanted £4300 within the next 14 days or they would take court action against her.

She was in an accident 9 months ago. The other car was insured by Churchill, we are not.
Churchill say that they haven't received the money from our insurer so they sent this letter to us. Arseholes.

I called our insurer, I'm the policy holder, Mrs Albion is a named driver. They say they are disputing some costs that Churchill want but it's nothing to do with us and they will handle it. Churchill are just trying it on and it's a load of hot air apparently.

Not happy about them causing us stress and worry over something that is between them and not us.   >:(




Wow,  :o
That sounds incredibily like bullying tactits, and the use of intimidation, to me. Id definitely complain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 14 March, 2013, 10:06:06 PM
Quote from: Albion on 14 March, 2013, 08:36:44 PM
Mrs Albion went home at lunchtime and there was a letter for her saying that Churchill Insurance wanted £4300 within the next 14 days or they would take court action against her.

She was in an accident 9 months ago. The other car was insured by Churchill, we are not.
Churchill say that they haven't received the money from our insurer so they sent this letter to us. Arseholes.

I called our insurer, I'm the policy holder, Mrs Albion is a named driver. They say they are disputing some costs that Churchill want but it's nothing to do with us and they will handle it. Churchill are just trying it on and it's a load of hot air apparently.

Not happy about them causing us stress and worry over something that is between them and not us.   >:(

Churchill? Arseholes? Oh yess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 14 March, 2013, 10:25:37 PM
I work motor insurance claims manager with Aviva, and you see this a lot. Reading between the lines Churchill have probably had no joy from your insurer and the best way to gee them up is to send a threatening letter to you which causes you to chase down your insurers into action. Grubby tactics but if your insurance is valid Churchill will have no claim against you as you have an insurer contracted to take on your RTA responsibilities.

The worst that could happen is that Churchill take you to court and they then enforce the judgement against the insurer. As the insured the judgement will be against you and it could in theory result in a CCJ against you - if this happens you can go to the Ombudsman to get compensation and have your insurer compelled to get it reversed. Essentially once they threaten litigation and you complain your insurer should wake up and resolve the matter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 14 March, 2013, 10:38:53 PM
Thanks Buttonman.

My insurer says that they are disputing some costs with Churchill and that if we get another letter I should scan it and email it to them and they will deal with it. They say it is just a lot of hot air to get a reaction.
My insurers are disputing a claim for payment of a hire car for the other party that went on for longer than my insurer deemed necessary and that's why they haven't paid Churchill yet. They hope to settle it shortly.
It really is grubby tactics as it is nothing to do with us now as far as we are concerned. We paid our insurance and as far as we knew it was dealt with nine months ago. It causes stress and anger for us when really it is between them. They are just scaring us into doing part of their work for them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 15 March, 2013, 06:55:53 PM
Sliced into a fresh loaf of bread only to find it was essentially hollow. So I paid for what amounts to a loaf of air. Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 March, 2013, 07:49:30 PM
was theer a satisfied looking mouse in the middle?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 15 March, 2013, 11:09:24 PM
My wife proudly told me that she bagged a "bargain" on Ebay today when she won an auction for a cabin bed for my daughter.

I've pointed out to her that it's not a bargain because I will have to hire a van to go and collect it and it's 2 hours away. Naturally the whole situation is now all my fault for pointing out these facts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 15 March, 2013, 11:22:17 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 15 March, 2013, 11:09:24 PM
Naturally the whole situation is now all my fault for pointing out these facts.

A rookie error Rog. ;)

As for my minor impediment of the day...my 'sometimes a bit of a prick' boss has insisted I work on Monday (y'know bank holiday in the Emerald Isle for the patron saint of malt liquor) on, from what I gather, nothing more than a spiteful whim.
And I don't get paid any extra or get a day in lieu for bank holidays. Hrrrrmmmmmm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 March, 2013, 07:29:12 AM
Last night I managed to obtain a paper cut from a roll of Christmas wrapping paper while in the attic looking for a bag for Carolyn  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 18 March, 2013, 05:19:50 PM
I've just got a new iphone and I thought I'd test out Siri.
I asked it 'What is Judge Dredd?' and it gave me loads of info about the '95 Stallone film! >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 18 March, 2013, 05:21:40 PM
Quote from: JamesC on 18 March, 2013, 05:19:50 PM
I've just got a new iphone and I thought I'd test out Siri.
I asked it 'What is Judge Dredd?' and it gave me loads of info about the '95 Stallone film! >:(


Try Dredd?  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 19 March, 2013, 06:14:31 PM
I'm still at work. Not actually working mind (my hours are over now) but this lecturer is still taking a class over an hour after they're supposed to finish! And I'm not sure I can just leave cos it looks like I'll be the lock-up person. Or contacting the lock-up person. Gnnnn,.* I only get paid until 5.

I actually do often intentionally work late, but I wasn't really planning on doing that today. Not that I am really working but I am hanging around.

*Of course I could just stick my head in the room and tell them but...
Oh okay. Looks like they're leaving now. Thank goodness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 19 March, 2013, 10:23:58 PM
A large section of one of my molars has just fell away. Fuckity fuck fuck.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 19 March, 2013, 11:03:06 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 19 March, 2013, 10:23:58 PM
A large section of one of my molars has just fell away. Fuckity fuck fuck.





V

Happened me in January. One of the most depressing Brundle-Fly moments of my life.
The reconstructive fillings are cheap enough these days though...€150 quid should sort it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 March, 2013, 04:53:51 PM
that happened the day before my wedding!


   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 March, 2013, 08:13:24 PM
Pushing the boundaries of a 'minor impediment', it turns out am still a complete f'ing idiot

My 6yr-old son's swimming lesson this evening was a bloody disgrace.  The (new, very nice, but rather hopeless) instructor was paying no attention to the pushing and shoving that was going on every time she turned her back, one lad and one lass in particular acting the maggot and generally distracting everyone.

Out of the blue the pushy girl's father goes over to the line and rather than bringing it to the instructor's attention, which I had been on the verge of doing, starts giving out to the main offending boy and to my son, the only other boy in the 11-strong class, and who (for once, being very serious about his swimming) had not been involved.  I was in swimming with my daughter at the time, and swam over to the side to ask him what the problem was.  He said 'the boys are pushing the girls', I replied 'and vice versa', he said 'well I told the boys to go the back of the line and let the girls go first'.  I told him if he had a problem with the way the class was organised he should talk to the instructor about it, and not to my son, who by this point was standing at the back of the line looking utterly miserable. 

He replied that he hadn't talked to my son, which he blatantly just had, and I lost my temper completely, saw only red mist and shouted, very loudly, at him that if I saw him ordering my son around again during his swimming lesson he would have a serious problem with me.  He slunk off.  If he hadn't I think I'd have hit him right there and then.

What a stupid bloody thing to lose my temper over, standing there dripping wet in front of a pool full of kids and parents shouting at a fat git like the fucking idiot I am.  I'm in my 40s.  You think I'd have learnt some bloody sense by now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 20 March, 2013, 08:49:50 PM
The emigration roundup:

Nobody can cope with life in Canada unless they have a car. It's torture.
To buy a car, you need insurance.
To get insurance, you need a Canadian licence.
To swap your UK licence for a Canadian one, you need to go to the test centre.
To get to the test centre... Yep. You need a car.

That's just a small sample of the frustrations and difficulties of starting afresh in a new country. I realise these are the epitome of first world problems, but after a week I'm going a bit mad.

Yes, I have hired a car now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 March, 2013, 08:50:18 PM
TordleBack ,dude, i'm sure I would have done the same. I'm extremely protective of my siblings (to the point where I feel shame when they misbehave and rage when there made to cry) and from what you've said this guy was way out of line. It's the instructors duty to make sure the children keep in line during the lessons, not his. You had every right to lose your rag with him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 20 March, 2013, 10:18:53 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 20 March, 2013, 08:13:24 PM
He replied that he hadn't talked to my son, which he blatantly just had, and I lost my temper completely, saw only red mist and shouted, very loudly, at him that if I saw him ordering my son around again during his swimming lesson he would have a serious problem with me.  He slunk off.  If he hadn't I think I'd have hit him right there and then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=pIT1u9CXHR4#t=9s (https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=pIT1u9CXHR4#t=9s)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 21 March, 2013, 09:23:44 AM
Quote
He replied that he hadn't talked to my son, which he blatantly just had, and I lost my temper completely, saw only red mist and shouted, very loudly, at him that if I saw him ordering my son around again during his swimming lesson he would have a serious problem with me.  He slunk off.  If he hadn't I think I'd have hit him right there and then.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=pIT1u9CXHR4#t=9s

:lol: Nice one sauchie!

But TB, don't put yourself down for it. It happens to everyone and you won.


M.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 March, 2013, 09:26:03 AM
Man, how fucking crap is the Dark Horse comics App?

Comics you've bought completely fail to download, unattractive and confusing interface, frequent crashes...

Sort it out!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 21 March, 2013, 09:39:25 AM
Quote from: radiator on 21 March, 2013, 09:26:03 AM
Man, how fucking crap is the Dark Horse comics App?

Comics you've bought completely fail to download, unattractive and confusing interface, frequent crashes...

Sort it out!

iOS Dark Horse update released today...did you have the problem before or after? (I know sometimes the bloody updates casue more problems than fixing them)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 March, 2013, 10:04:18 AM
Oh, that's interesting. I haven't updated yet, but when I did some angry Googling/reading of App Store reviews I got the impression that these problems have persisted since the App launched and have so far not been fixed by updates.

It's a pain, because Comixology is so lovely to use - I actually (despite a few occasional issues I have with their pricing) like buying stuff from them because the process is so smooth and user friendly, and the presentation is fantastic. Shame the same can't be said for DH - I bought Lone Wolf and Cub Volume 1 and it resolutely fails to download fully, disappearing from my shelf every time I re-open the App. I also really don't like the layout or design. What is a 'Collection' and why is that different from the 'Bookshelf'? Why do they keep trying to get me to download comics I have no interest in? They can't even get the page-turning mechanic right!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 March, 2013, 10:45:05 AM
Why can't they just leave things alone? A recent Gmail app update basically buggered my phone. You get everything just right how you want it, and then an update comes along and ruins everything.

On a related issue, Google have agreed to send a replacement phone as my current handset no longer charges via USB. However, I need to use my credit card as security before they send it and, unfortunately, Google Wallet doesn't accept UK credit cards. So, I'm a bit stuffed...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 March, 2013, 10:59:02 AM
QuoteWhy can't they just leave things alone? A recent Gmail app update basically buggered my phone. You get everything just right how you want it, and then an update comes along and ruins everything.

I feel this way about iTunes. I own two computers - one at work, one at home. I used to be able to simply drag and drop songs/podcasts etc onto my iPod/iPhone at leisure. But every time they update iTunes it buggers it all up, forces me to 'sync' each device to each computer (WHY?!?!?!), wipes all podcasts off a device etc etc. Why is it so difficult to just do something so basic such as drag and drop? I also hate the new iTunes layout and interface - it wasn't broken, so why fix it?

And don't even get me started on the new Podcasts App....

I also, in all honesty, preferred Facebook circa 2007, when it was more like MySpace - basically like having your own little personal, customisable website, rather than forcing you to 'share' everything with everyone, all the time. Um, I don't really want to 'share' nerdy conversations about comics and stuff with all my friends and family.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 21 March, 2013, 11:48:13 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 20 March, 2013, 08:13:24 PM
He replied that he hadn't talked to my son, which he blatantly just had, and I lost my temper completely, saw only red mist and shouted, very loudly, at him that if I saw him ordering my son around again during his swimming lesson he would have a serious problem with me.  He slunk off.  If he hadn't I think I'd have hit him right there and then.
The spirit of SBT lives on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 21 March, 2013, 01:18:02 PM
Just found a hole in my sock and now my toe is sticking through and rubbing against the inside of my shoe.

Oh, and welcome to Canada Troutfire.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 March, 2013, 02:45:14 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 21 March, 2013, 01:18:02 PM
Just found a hole in my sock and now my toe is sticking through and rubbing against the inside of my shoe.

Oh, and welcome to Canada Troutfire.

Thank you! Are you in Canada? I may need to borrow money. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 21 March, 2013, 03:38:03 PM
Quote from: Supermarine Troutfire on 21 March, 2013, 02:45:14 PM

I may need to borrow money. ;)

:lol:

I'm in Ottawa.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 March, 2013, 03:51:21 PM
Client asks for a design for a "folder" - which I took to mean something you insert individual sheets into. You know - you've seen them before. They're those things that people call a "folder".

So, I've spent a few hours on that. Quite a nice design. Now it turns out what they really meant was a design for a folded leaflet ie. an sheet A4 folded once to A5. Who the heck calls a folded leaflet a "folder"...!?!

What next? I'm going to have to check...

"So, madam. When you say you want a "poster", do you mean a printed sheet suitable for displaying on the wall? Or, do you really mean that you want TordelBack...?"

~mumble, mumble~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 March, 2013, 08:05:06 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 21 March, 2013, 03:38:03 PM
Quote from: Supermarine Troutfire on 21 March, 2013, 02:45:14 PM

I may need to borrow money. ;)

:lol:

I'm in Ottawa.

I'm on my way! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 21 March, 2013, 08:10:07 PM
Just got my old stuff from my ex in the post... even we finished before xmas.... still no sight of my real human heart in the package!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 22 March, 2013, 03:48:06 PM
I just freshened up the inside of my work shoes with oven cleaner.

In my defence, the squirty bottle of Febreeze is remarkably similar to the squirty bottle of oven cleaner, especially to a tired dimwit who left his glasses in the car.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 23 March, 2013, 11:53:54 PM
I have just finished working for the day. I am working again tomorrow, meaning I will have worked around 110 hours this week.

I am...tired.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 24 March, 2013, 06:32:03 PM
My 7 year old came home on friday and told us that a teaching assistant had had the class in tears telling them to think about someone they loved who had died...are they allowed to do that? surely if something like that was on the curriculum parental permission would be sought ? needless to say we arent happy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 24 March, 2013, 09:20:24 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 24 March, 2013, 06:32:03 PM
My 7 year old came home on friday and told us that a teaching assistant had had the class in tears telling them to think about someone they loved who had died...are they allowed to do that? surely if something like that was on the curriculum parental permission would be sought ? needless to say we arent happy.

That looks more like the type of thing appropriate to a drama class under 'how to induce a strong emotion'. An ADULT drama class, I hasten to add.

Yeah, out of order.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 24 March, 2013, 10:27:28 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 23 March, 2013, 11:53:54 PM
I have just finished working for the day. I am working again tomorrow, meaning I will have worked around 110 hours this week.

Aye, but you'll bill the client for 180 hours.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 March, 2013, 08:39:10 AM
Due to go camping at Easter.  Extra sleeping bags packed in case it's cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 25 March, 2013, 12:55:10 PM
Feel proper rough. Yesterday was a day long endurance test, and thats no lie.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 25 March, 2013, 01:43:53 PM
A totally random little 'water blister' is forming under my tongue every time I eat something.
Annoying as F*CK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 25 March, 2013, 01:55:50 PM
Pinched my finger in a door and have a blood blister forming under this skin. Painful bloody thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 March, 2013, 08:08:13 PM
I managed to take a wrong turn while out on my bike today and managed to end up miles from anywhere in the middle of the worst snow shower of the day with a massive hill to climb. On the bright side, if I hadn't done that I wouldn't have passed a place called Threepwood Farm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 March, 2013, 08:19:19 PM
My email account was hacked last night, while I was at work and what a fiasco. I kept getting email, text and pm alerts to tell me but by the time I could do anything about it my phone was nearly dead and I'd forgot to bring my lead to charge the drokker with (which I always do). I had to quickly log into the account, go to the desktop version and change the password before my power went and luckily I did it before the thing switched off!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 27 March, 2013, 08:34:04 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 27 March, 2013, 08:08:13 PM
I managed to take a wrong turn while out on my bike today and managed to end up miles from anywhere in the middle of the worst snow shower of the day with a massive hill to climb. On the bright side, if I hadn't done that I wouldn't have passed a place called Threepwood Farm.

I've seen at least three horror movies that started with that synopsis.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 27 March, 2013, 11:02:51 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 March, 2013, 08:19:19 PM
My email account was hacked last night, while I was at work and what a fiasco. I kept getting email, text and pm alerts to tell me but by the time I could do anything about it my phone was nearly dead and I'd forgot to bring my lead to charge the drokker with (which I always do). I had to quickly log into the account, go to the desktop version and change the password before my power went and luckily I did it before the thing switched off!

Wasn't a Yahoo email account was it?  They're getting hacked every five minutes at the moment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dredd Head on 27 March, 2013, 11:32:05 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 27 March, 2013, 08:34:04 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 27 March, 2013, 08:08:13 PM
I managed to take a wrong turn while out on my bike today and managed to end up miles from anywhere in the middle of the worst snow shower of the day with a massive hill to climb. On the bright side, if I hadn't done that I wouldn't have passed a place called Threepwood Farm.

I've seen at least three horror movies that started with that synopsis.

Yea you know it aint ending well
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 28 March, 2013, 09:47:08 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 27 March, 2013, 11:02:51 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 March, 2013, 08:19:19 PM
My email account was hacked last night, while I was at work and what a fiasco. I kept getting email, text and pm alerts to tell me but by the time I could do anything about it my phone was nearly dead and I'd forgot to bring my lead to charge the drokker with (which I always do). I had to quickly log into the account, go to the desktop version and change the password before my power went and luckily I did it before the thing switched off!

Wasn't a Yahoo email account was it?  They're getting hacked every five minutes at the moment.

I don't keep any names in my address book any more so that if my account gets hacked some of my more vulnerable relatives don't get e-mails...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 28 March, 2013, 10:21:13 PM
Nah! It was my behind the times hotmail account :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 28 March, 2013, 11:13:37 PM
When you accidently sign up to Amazon Prime and find yourself £40 out of pocket when you need that money the next day. Fuck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 March, 2013, 12:54:44 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 March, 2013, 08:19:19 PM
My email account was hacked last night, while I was at work and what a fiasco. I kept getting email, text and pm alerts to tell me but by the time I could do anything about it my phone was nearly dead and I'd forgot to bring my lead to charge the drokker with (which I always do). I had to quickly log into the account, go to the desktop version and change the password before my power went and luckily I did it before the thing switched off!

Yes I got an email from you - didn't click it but googled the name in the link and it seems to be a realtor in Kansas City!  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 29 March, 2013, 12:58:54 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 27 March, 2013, 11:02:51 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 March, 2013, 08:19:19 PM
My email account was hacked last night, while I was at work and what a fiasco. I kept getting email, text and pm alerts to tell me but by the time I could do anything about it my phone was nearly dead and I'd forgot to bring my lead to charge the drokker with (which I always do). I had to quickly log into the account, go to the desktop version and change the password before my power went and luckily I did it before the thing switched off!

Wasn't a Yahoo email account was it?  They're getting hacked every five minutes at the moment.


mine was the other day!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 March, 2013, 12:49:24 AM
I realised just before I went to work this evening that I've forgotten to buy Caz and Sam an Easter Egg. Now the thing is, I'm up Redhill all day today as Judge Burdis to man an event to help launch Autism Awareness month. It seems that I'm gonna have to buy those eggs as the Law, which should be interesting!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 30 March, 2013, 09:56:42 AM
Burdis, from the bottom of my rotten half decomposed heart, thank you. Lack of knowledge on autism is one of my lifes major impediments and every little thing to awarenes is valued IMHO. Hope you get the eggs and love to hear how the shop keeper reacts. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 30 March, 2013, 10:37:51 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 March, 2013, 12:49:24 AM
It seems that I'm gonna have to buy those eggs as the Law, which should be interesting!

80g refined sugar....you're looking at 4 years on Titan creep!

PS- fair play.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 30 March, 2013, 11:22:33 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 March, 2013, 12:49:24 AM
It seems that I'm gonna have to buy those eggs as the Law, which should be interesting!

Hi-eggs! And, to a lesser extent, standard eggsecution, rapid fire. Are either the Easter Bunny or Jesus on the long list of fictional/mythological characters whom Dredd has busted over the years?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 30 March, 2013, 12:49:27 PM
I suspect CF is in cahoots with somebody - on some obscure forum somewhere, to produce a Dredd easter egg..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 30 March, 2013, 12:59:56 PM
Pity the O. His missusususss's''s mother has invited herself over FOR THE WHOLE OF EASTER.

WHY

WHY
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 30 March, 2013, 01:23:13 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 30 March, 2013, 12:49:27 PM
I suspect CF is in cahoots with somebody - on some obscure forum somewhere, to produce a Dredd easter egg..

CF already has his own Easter Egg in the film. You cannot overestimate the disappointment I felt when I bought a DVD player and discovered that the discs didn't come packaged with free creme eggs.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 31 March, 2013, 09:47:32 AM
So CF was it an eventful purchase of those Easter Eggs?





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 02 April, 2013, 02:20:07 PM
My toast fell jam side down.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 April, 2013, 08:50:18 PM
I've now got used to the fact that half the clocks in the house go forward automatically, and I thought I'd reset the rest - all but my phone apparently, which I assume would be one of the self-adjusting ones but nooooo - which meant as it's also my alarm clock, I was late for work after no breakfast and a very unsatisfactory shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 April, 2013, 05:50:12 PM
My favourite pub is letting all sorts of arseholes in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dredd Head on 03 April, 2013, 05:55:46 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 03 April, 2013, 05:50:12 PM
My favourite pub is letting all sorts of arseholes in.

That's usually the reason I dont drink in pubs, It seems that some people like to cause fights and trouble wherever you go
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 April, 2013, 06:12:33 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 03 April, 2013, 05:50:12 PM
My favourite pub is letting all sorts of arseholes in.
I thought it was a vegan place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 03 April, 2013, 07:35:18 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 03 April, 2013, 05:50:12 PM
My favourite pub is letting all sorts of arseholes in.

Would they let me in? :-*
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 04 April, 2013, 06:28:54 PM
Imagine a world where every time something positive happens - say, for example, getting a new job and ending your first month *slightly* less in debt than previous months - something terrible always happens to remind you of your place -  like a pavement-cycling teenage scrotebag crashing into your car and fucking the passenger door right up.

Needless to say, I'm now looking for a good car body shop who can get the job done before it rains. Fucksticks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 11 April, 2013, 06:37:39 PM
Because some prick tore my girlfriend's wing mirror off in a road rage incident.

The annoying thing is, she can be an extremely aggressive and vocal driver herself, and something like this was bound to happen eventually.

I've cautioned her many times not to let herself get so wound up, but as I don't drive she just dismisses my objections. Sometimes you really want to say "I told you so"...

Going to cost £250 to repair apparently.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 11 April, 2013, 08:09:42 PM
Quote from: radiator on 11 April, 2013, 06:37:39 PM
Because some prick tore my girlfriend's wing mirror off in a road rage incident.

The annoying thing is, she can be an extremely aggressive and vocal driver herself, and something like this was bound to happen eventually.

I've cautioned her many times not to let herself get so wound up, but as I don't drive she just dismisses my objections. Sometimes you really want to say "I told you so"...

Going to cost £250 to repair apparently.
I often warn both my wife and my sister about this. One day they will shout back at the wrong man and end up with a baseball bat across the wind screen.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 12 April, 2013, 07:37:29 AM
Cause I'm awake an hour before my alarm is due to go off, coughing my guts up.
I swear to a god, 85% of the people I know have a cold or flu at the moment...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 April, 2013, 01:36:11 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 12 April, 2013, 07:37:29 AM
Cause I'm awake an hour before my alarm is due to go off, coughing my guts up.
I swear to a god, 85% of the people I know have a cold or flu at the moment...
Isn't this how Aquila started?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 12 April, 2013, 02:07:05 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 12 April, 2013, 01:36:11 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 12 April, 2013, 07:37:29 AM
Cause I'm awake an hour before my alarm is due to go off, coughing my guts up.
I swear to a god, 85% of the people I know have a cold or flu at the moment...
Isn't this how Aquila started?

Captain Trips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 April, 2013, 02:11:00 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 12 April, 2013, 02:07:05 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 12 April, 2013, 01:36:11 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 12 April, 2013, 07:37:29 AM
Cause I'm awake an hour before my alarm is due to go off, coughing my guts up.
I swear to a god, 85% of the people I know have a cold or flu at the moment...
Isn't this how Aquila started?

Captain Trips.
True.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 April, 2013, 04:52:04 PM
Put my prog up out of the way of the kids because of this weeks cover and I can't bloody find it now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 12 April, 2013, 05:49:44 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 12 April, 2013, 07:37:29 AM
I swear to a god, 85% of the people I know have a cold or flu at the moment...

Yep.
And i feel your pain Rich - Ive had four(!) colds since Christmas. What the fook's that all about?

Shocking, but not as shocking as asbent mindedly pouring a good quarter of a bottle of vineger onto a fish n chip tea - like what ive just done. I persevered with eating it, but lord it was foul.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 12 April, 2013, 06:08:22 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 12 April, 2013, 05:49:44 PM
What the fook's that all about?

Wish I knew old bean.
What I do know is that my misery increased exponentially as the day went on, and I had to chair a meeting at 2pm looking EXACTLY like Odo from Deep Space Nine that time he caught the ol melty virus.

A hilarious time was had by all attendees.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 14 April, 2013, 09:46:18 AM
Think I might start requesting no birthday or xmas gifts from now on, or perhaps stipulate nothing that isn't edible.

Not to be totally ungrateful or anything, but I'm completely baffled as to what my friends thought i would want to do with a Lego X Wing....

Do they actually know me at all?

Now I'm in an awkward dilemma of what to do with the bloody thing. Is it wrong to put it straight on eBay?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 14 April, 2013, 11:36:59 AM
Sounds like it's that or the charity shop. You might as well at least get some beer money out of it.

The 32gb microSD card in my phone has failed for the second and apparently final time. I only bought it about six months ago. Cheap tat...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 April, 2013, 10:09:14 PM
Be kind hearted and assume it was a drunk purchase. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 April, 2013, 04:44:26 PM
Anyone else here live with a borderline hoarder?

I used to just think my girlfriend was just a bit disorganised/untidy in a charming sort of way, but these days I'm beginning to wonder if she is actually showing early signs of that worrying hoarder mentality, and might end up like one of those people you see on TV with old matresses blocking the doorways and rotting cat carcasses buried under mounds of junk.

Basically, she never gets rid of anything without a fight. I have to wage a constant battle to keep the living room in some sort of presentable order (I simply cannot work or create in a messy environment), but long ago had to cede the rest of the flat to anarchy. I sometimes feel that I must be the only person in the world who routinely gets a bollocking for tidying the flat while their partner is out.

Once in a blue moon she relents and agrees to spend an afternoon with me tackling the torrent of crap that threatens to overwhelm the flat.... but while I find a good spring clean calming and enjoyable, for her it is like pulling teeth, and she spends so long agonising over what to do with every single useless piece of junk that after a few hours we have barely scratched the surface of the problem and then she's bored, and that's that for another six months. It's always "We'll get this sorted next week/month", but the day never arrives.

Has anyone else had to deal with this sort of thing, or is a hoarder themselves? I'm seriously considering going on a complete housework strike from now on and seeing how bad is has to get for her to realise there's a serious problem. Moaning/talking about it is utterly futile and generally just leads to arguments.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 April, 2013, 05:02:45 PM
Quote from: radiator on 15 April, 2013, 04:44:26 PMI'm seriously considering going on a complete housework strike from now on and seeing how bad is has to get for her to realise there's a serious problem. Moaning/talking about it is utterly futile and generally just leads to arguments.

hmm - I reckon you'd crack before she does, this sort of tactic rarely works, she'll just think you've come around to her way of thinking.

I'm a bit of a hoarder myself, but you need to have the space and I do enjoy a big sort-out and clearance now and then, but I'm just too lazy to do it often.

You need to discuss some ground rules - maybe one area, a table or corner where stuff can be dumped - if it's full, then it must be cleared before adding any more junk; or a monthly 'tidy up' day linked to something nice, a meal out perhaps.

Or simply pile everything in a big heap in the front garden and refuse to let it back int he house!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 April, 2013, 05:35:48 PM
QuoteI'm a bit of a hoarder myself, but you need to have the space and I do enjoy a big sort-out and clearance now and then, but I'm just too lazy to do it often.

Don't get me wrong - I own a lot of stuff too, but it's all so organised and tidy it doesn't really take up much space in the flat - for example I own a lot of graphic novels, but they are all neatly contained on one bookshelf, likewise DVDs etc. I have regular clear outs and get rid of anything I haven't used for a couple of years - you have to, or it gets totally overwhelming, very quickly - especially stuff like paperwork/bank statements etc. I am quite ruthless, and have just a single shoebox which has all my things with 'sentimental value' in. I think the problem is that everything my girlfriend owns seems to have sentimental value to her.

I thought when we moved into our new flat things would improve as we have a lot more space now, but all it means is there's more space for her junk. She used to claim that the reason for her mess was that she didn't have any place to store her stuff, so I bought her some storage units and chests of drawers... which were promptly stuffed full of useless junk.

QuoteOr simply pile everything in a big heap in the front garden and refuse to let it back int he house!

I have actually fantasised about waiting til she goes away for a weekend, and essentially doing this. I'd be in a whole world of pain when she got back of course, but man it'd be worth it!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 15 April, 2013, 05:52:50 PM
I suggest moving. I've never considered myself a hoarder, but after 12 years in the same place I couldn't believe the amount of useless junk I was holding onto. It's much easier to part with things than moving them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 15 April, 2013, 07:13:03 PM
Just dropped my ipad. Dented the corner, but hasn't affected anything else.
The urge to SCREAM is so intense that I'm worried I'd keel over dead after letting it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 15 April, 2013, 09:43:34 PM
Quote from: radiator on 15 April, 2013, 04:44:26 PM
Anyone else here live with a borderline hoarder?

Yes, you are not alone Radiator, I could have written your post word for word about my wife.

I wish I could offer some advise but I am at a loss myself, I have no idea how to get her to change her ways and believe me I have tried but she just doesn't realise she has any kind of problem. Her Sister and Mother are exactly the same as her too.

It's very frustrating to live with someone like this, anything that isn't obvious rubbish can be a real challenge to get rid of.

My wife will put a kind of preservation order on things we don't need any longer, for example there is a pushchair that is taking up half of the porch, my youngest has been walking for over two years now but every time I mention getting rid of the buggy she will suddenly think of someone who is expecting who might want it, but it never gets any further than that. There is a similar story for all of the crap in my house.

The other fight I constantly have is the way she stores stuff, she has no concept of what is an appropriate place to keep something long term, I am forever clearing stuff of window sills, staircases and worktops that would just stay where it was otherwise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 April, 2013, 10:02:31 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 15 April, 2013, 09:43:34 PM
Quote from: radiator on 15 April, 2013, 04:44:26 PM
Anyone else here live with a borderline hoarder?

Yes, you are not alone Radiator, I could have written your post word for word about my wife.

I wish I could offer some advise but I am at a loss myself, I have no idea how to get her to change her ways and believe me I have tried but she just doesn't realise she has any kind of problem. Her Sister and Mother are exactly the same as her too.

It's very frustrating to live with someone like this, anything that isn't obvious rubbish can be a real challenge to get rid of.

My wife will put a kind of preservation order on things we don't need any longer, for example there is a pushchair that is taking up half of the porch, my youngest has been walking for over two years now but every time I mention getting rid of the buggy she will suddenly think of someone who is expecting who might want it, but it never gets any further than that. There is a similar story for all of the crap in my house.

The other fight I constantly have is the way she stores stuff, she has no concept of what is an appropriate place to keep something long term, I am forever clearing stuff of window sills, staircases and worktops that would just stay where it was otherwise.

Oh yes, all so true! Glad someone else understands.

There are particular things that seem to accumulate. I can remember one time I tidied the flat and found 7 empty mineral water bottles scattered around the place. After much negotiation, I was allowed to get rid of 5 of them. Old newspapers and magazines are another one. Also: bags. Bags everywhere. Bags hanging off every door handle. Bags within bags.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 16 April, 2013, 07:05:54 AM
We have the bags too. They seem to contain mainly old clothes and shoes belonging to her and the kids, each one is overfilled to bursting point and usually has a coat hanger jutting out of the side.
I have actually made some progress with the bags recently and managed to sort through most of them and drop the stuff off to the charity bins at the supermarket.

I try to stay vigilant and get on top of them as soon as they appear now, it seems to be easier to get rid of stuff sooner rather than later, I also try to pre-empt which items might be about to get the preservation order treatment and try to get rid of them before she has a chance to think about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 April, 2013, 09:02:28 AM
Jeez, sounds like you have it a lot worse than me!

As I said I manage to keep the living room/kitchen fairly tidy, but it's a constant struggle, and she usually insists on keeping a bit of mess intact, almost as a protest. She has the mentality that - because we use something regularly, say the Hoover, there is no point in ever putting it away and will happily leave it strewn across the living room floor.

One tactic I've found that works is to get rid of the really useless little things bit by bit and hope she doesn't notice (and to nip things in the bud as you say, before they get 'settled'), or to group things together in neat piles (like receipts, which are always all over the bloody place).

Another frustrating thing she does is to kick off and prevent me from tidying and insist on doing it herself, but she always does a really half-assed job. There are also things like decorating and DIY - I have to really push for months to get things like that done because she always comes up with an excuse for why we can't do it (or again, why we should leave a job half-finished), but if I didn't nag we'd still be sitting in an in decorated flat now!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 April, 2013, 09:13:43 AM
they are probably both on other forums moaning about OCD husbands who keep moving their stuff!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 April, 2013, 09:42:27 AM
In fact this is just it - for years it has been ME with the problem. It's only after a few recent incidents I have started to worry that her behaviour shows real signs of that hoarder mentality and is actually more serious than my mildly obsessive fastidiousness. She seems to have a definite problem when it comes to dealing with change and letting stuff go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 16 April, 2013, 12:49:02 PM
If it's not in bad taste, you could direct her to the story in the link below. It might give her pause for thought, a chance to reflect on what she's doing and maybe change her hoarding ways.

http://www.independent.ie/world-news/americas/hoarder-missing-for-two-months-found-mummified-under-pile-of-rubbish-29200282.html

It's a long shot, I know, but hope it's of some help to you both. (And I speak as someone with a bit of a hoarding habit myself!)

Cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 19 April, 2013, 06:28:19 PM
This kind of hoarding starts when there is some kind of underlying emotional problem from a person's past which means they cannot let go, or they are scared to. Obviously older people who were subjected to the trauma of WW2 and the instructions from the government to 'make, do and mend' have an awful time because in their mind, their refusal to stop saving things has been officially sanctioned.

We have tendencies in our family and it is nearly always because the person concerned doesn't want to admit that time has passed, or they don't want to look at things which remind them of someone who they miss or who hurt them. They may have once been appallingly hard up and can't get over the idea that they are comfortable and safe enough to chuck things now and could buy replacements later if they made a mistake.

I occasionally start doing it myself and then blitz everything when I'm feeling better again. Luckily my downtimes don't last so long nowadays.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 April, 2013, 08:12:15 AM
That's an interesting point, My wife's Mother grew up as part of a big family who had very little when they were kids just after WW2 and you can see signs of hoarding all down that side of her family, its almost as though once it starts it becomes a gene that is passed down the generations.

Her Mum is pretty bad but my Father i Law keeps it in check quite well, my Sister in law is even worse than my wife and she has an Uncle (Mum's Brother) who lives in Canada that would be a candidate for one of those TV shows.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 27 April, 2013, 11:00:23 AM
Where do people draw the line between "Collecting" and "Hoarding"?  :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 27 April, 2013, 11:50:53 AM
I think for my girlfriend its more out of laziness/an almost pathological hatred of sorting and organising. She once put off buying a new phone for over a year, even though her current one was falling apart and needed to be charged twice a day - PURELY because she couldn't face the prospect of entering in all of her numbers to a new phone. Madness.

Having said that, she does seem to place sentimental value on the weirdest things.

I feel like I may have oversold the problem as I was more narked than usual when I posted. The problem isn't that bad really, I just sometimes suspect that she shows early signs of these worrying tendencies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 April, 2013, 12:31:35 PM
Quote from: radiator on 27 April, 2013, 11:50:53 AM
I feel like I may have oversold the problem as I was more narked than usual when I posted. The problem isn't that bad really, I just sometimes suspect that she shows early signs of these worrying tendencies.

Catching up on this thread, I regret to report that both my wife and I suffer from these 'tendencies'.  Early in our relationship I had thought that it was my bad influence (e.g. 24 years on, I retain the tag from a box of Roses that we shared on our first 'date', tied to a cork net float found while scavenging driftwood from our first beach bonfire... and it doesn't stop there... I have the tickets to every single museum and attraction I've ever visited, and since they started printing the names of the film, every cinema ticket), since her parents' house was a temple to white-brick minimalism, until I chanced to open a random cupboard there and discovered that every single concealed space in the building was crammed to bursting with every variety of kipple, indicating a combined genetic/upbringing component.

I have got a bit better since I now spend the majority of my days in the house, but I still cannot suffer a piece of scrap wood or computer hardware to be discarded: a behaviour that is tragically reinforced every time I discover I have 'the very thing for that'. 
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 27 April, 2013, 08:02:35 PM
It was only after a lot of soul-searching that I recently tossed out about 85% of the contents of my Big Bag of Cables. Obviously, since then I've needed (and no longer owned) a VGA lead and a 56k modem cable.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 April, 2013, 09:50:04 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 27 April, 2013, 08:02:35 PM
Obviously, since then I've needed (and no longer owned) a VGA lead and a 56k modem cable.

See? See?

My worst affliction in this regard is my Giant Box of Old Glues.  You never know when you'll need a flexible epoxy with good lateral strength that dries clear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 28 April, 2013, 10:06:43 AM
Well, if we are talking about big boxes of cables then I am guilty as charged too, I'm just looking up at mine as it sits on the big shelf above me and it's like a bloody snake's wedding in there.

I do have a rule though, if I can't get the lid on the box when I add something then I have to throw something else away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 28 April, 2013, 06:41:37 PM
No second trip to Wembley, and non league footie, again, next season.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 28 April, 2013, 09:13:19 PM
Burnt a CD of three songs for a funeral today and it killed my CD/DVD writer!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 01 May, 2013, 07:05:38 PM
I am INCREDIBLY pissed off today.

Some of you guys may have seen me post about this on Facebook.

A few weeks back, we got a visit from some guys in a South West Water van, who informed us that there was a 'major issue' with the waterworks under the block of properties where myself and my ailing grandmother live.

the 'issue' was a massive leak in the pipeworks. However, the pipework is so convoluted and badly maintained that there is apparently no way to ascertain the source of the leak.

It quickly became clear that all South West Water were interested in was finding out who to bill for the gallons of water being lost every day.

TODAY, two letters from South West Water, one addressed to my grandma, and one addressed to the couple running the shop below her flat, revealed EXACTLY who they intended to charge.

The shop has been stuck with a £1,000 bill, while my gran has been stuck for £899.

Except... water rates are supposed to be inclusive of her rent.

There is NO FRIGGIN' WAY this bill is getting paid. So, instead, we look forward to the inevitable wrangle between the water provider, the landlord, the agents... and it all smacks of somebody being pressured into finding someone to bill ASAP.

NOT impressed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 May, 2013, 12:01:02 PM
The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things:
Of shoes, and ships, and sealing-wax, and motherdrokking banks.

So we're behind in our mortgage, yeah yeah sing me that old number, and we've been begging thm for some sort of interest-only deal while we find our feet, but there's a queue and they're considering our appeal, and they'll get back to us, and all the while the arrears and the charges grow, and then out of the blue, instead of giving us an answer, the bank send this thug-in-a-suit debt collector from a collections agency guy round, all unannounced like. 

To my house.

So I say, how do I know this guy is a real guy, seeing as the bank has spent a lot of its time and my money telling me !beware! it will never contact me unsolicited, or through a third party, and this here is both.  All he has is an unaddressed, unsigned, generic lump of boilerplate on some laser-printed letterhead telling me he is who he says he is.  You might say I'm being disingenuous here, and you might be right, but I've had a lot of dealings with collections from both side, and I know they/we thrive on attention, and this the first peep out the Bank in months and it's not even them so feck it.

So I ignore the guy and write to the Asst Manager who has previously been our mortgage person but seems to be ignoring me now, to ask is this guy a guy and what happened man you used to be cool?  Nothing.  So the guy comes back, and I write again.  Nothing.  So I call my branch, and no-one that will answer a phone has ever heard of their Asst Manager, who apparently left at some point over the last few months.  So I explain my situation, and ask who I should speak to now, so they give me a name, but she isn't in, so I write to her.  And nothing.  And the guy comes back, and I write again, and nothing.

Then, halleluljah!  The fifth trumpet sounds! And lo, a letter from the bank arrives!  They do exist!  They do remember me!

And I crack the wax and hold my breath, and.

It's a form letter telling me how much more I now owe every month, because they've increased the variable rate even as the ECB rate has been reduced.

"Oh oysters," said the Carpenter, "You've had a pleasant run!"
"Shall we be trotting home again?", but answer came there none.
And this was hardly odd, because they'd eaten every one.

Ah I feel better with that off my chest.

TL;DR: WANKERS, ombudsman, bah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 04 May, 2013, 01:35:53 PM
We had nasty threatening letters from nPower and their bailiffs which were terrifying enough, but I can't imagine how scary it must have been to have had a debt collector at your door. You're one of the good guys, TB - I hope it all works out for your home and your family,

(As an aside, nPower recalculated and ended up applying £6.24 credit, so it was complete bollocks all along).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 May, 2013, 03:28:58 PM
Ah, just venting my frustration really, which did the trick oh virtual confessors - I've dealt with sheriffs and bailiffs in the business world, so I'm not that bothered beyond the rudeness of it all.  It seems like almost unimaginable stupidity that a bailed-out bank could afford to commission a third party to go door-to-door seeking blood from a stone, but can't manage to notify us in advance, or tell us that our regular contact over several years has left the company, or answer ANY of their correspondence over a 5 month period.  No wonder they effectively went bust, any business that carried on that way would.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 06 May, 2013, 07:20:44 PM
Which bank?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 06 May, 2013, 08:37:34 PM
Hang in there, Tordel. We're all rooting for you.

I doubt that helps much, but I wanted to say something supportive and I don't really do sincerity very well.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 May, 2013, 09:18:09 PM
Cheers Trout, it is however only a very minor impediment: unlike being an unemployed journo who can't do sincerity!

Tips:  it's AIB, FWIW.  SNAFU.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 06 May, 2013, 09:30:17 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 04 May, 2013, 12:01:02 PM

WANKERS

I'll leave it at that succinct quote Tordel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 08 May, 2013, 04:21:49 AM
Because it's 4:15 in the morning and I'm still wide awake thanks to coming down with a nasty cold yesterday and the accompanying sore throat - which is so severe and painful it is making sleep impossible. Never experienced anything quite like it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 May, 2013, 07:09:55 PM
We have an urgent delivery being sent via UPS which has been picked up today. I just checked and the address shown on their system is wrong (I did give the correct address to the sender three times) so the delivery tomorrow will fail. Having just phoned UPS to give them the correct address, they are unwilling to change it until a failed delivery is made tomorrow.

So, the driver is on a fool's errand. Time, money and petrol are all wasted and - most significantly -the already overdue package won't get delivered until next week, all because of words like "system" and "contract". Why can't UPS behave like nice, decent people and help. Let's get things done right, instead of being unconstructive, capitalistic and inhuman.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 May, 2013, 01:39:20 PM
I got a parking ticket from one of those cowboy private parking firms last week. I was parked in a hospital loading bay on urgent business and not causing any kind of obstruction. I had a sign in my windscreen saying who I was and what I was doing but they gave me a ticket.

It's not a real ticket, just an invoice, and there is actually no legal requirement for me to pay it so normally I would just ignore it and the stream of letters that follow until they give up, but unfortunately I will have to pay it because I was in a hire car so the fine will go to the hire company and under the terms of the contract they will pay it and then invoice me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 11 May, 2013, 05:09:28 PM
Fell off my bike at the decent at Winter Hill this morning and broke my left shoulder, so i'm gonna have an excruciating first week of A-level examinations with it in a full arm cast. Oh, and £60 worth of repairs to the bike to. Fuck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 May, 2013, 05:23:40 PM
Oh that is cruddy luck there Hawkmonger.  Ouch, double ouch and feck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 12 May, 2013, 03:38:43 AM
Yeah that's nasty, sad to read that hawkmonger. On the other hand you posted a broken shoulder in the 'minor impediments' thread so you must be a bit of a hard nut.

Joking aside I hope you feel better soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 12 May, 2013, 08:16:29 AM
Can anyone explain why a cold used to come and go in 2-3 days, but now the whole process seems to spread out over weeks, with the symptoms disappearing entirely for days at a time only to return with a vengeance?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 May, 2013, 11:08:30 AM
Thanks Tordle, Mardroid. I've opted not to take pain killers during the exams as I don't want something else to worry about, as i'll have to take them half way through which will detract from my exam time. Should be right as rain in a month or so though so no problems...excpet for by bank balance.

Quote from: radiator on 12 May, 2013, 08:16:29 AM
Can anyone explain why a cold used to come and go in 2-3 days, but now the whole process seems to spread out over weeks, with the symptoms disappearing entirely for days at a time only to return with a vengeance?

My whole family came down with it a few weeks ago, litteraly only just got over it. It's true what they say, the micro-organisms around us are getting stronger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 12 May, 2013, 12:50:19 PM
Annoying thing is I have tickets booked for Star Trek later, so I'm going to be that guy in the cinema, sniffling, sneezing and coughing through the film.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 13 May, 2013, 08:18:23 PM
Yikes, Hawkmonger - I hope your recovery time flies by.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 13 May, 2013, 10:49:54 PM
Quote from: radiator on 12 May, 2013, 12:50:19 PM
Annoying thing is I have tickets booked for Star Trek later, so I'm going to be that guy in the cinema, sniffling, sneezing and coughing through the film.

One to beam up....into the heart of the f*cking sun!

Had the same dose a few weeks ago Radiator. My life was like an excerpt from 'The Stand'. Bad strain goin round I think.

And Hawk...sorry to hear bout that Winter Hill of discontent, best of luck with the exams.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 14 May, 2013, 01:28:52 PM
I do hope the poorly people get better soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 May, 2013, 05:20:48 PM
Thanks to everyone who wished me well, arms getting along dandy if a bit sore.
My exam on the other hand....feck is the most colloquial I can phrase. Ever made a really big mistake that you don't realise until the last moment? Yeah, that kinda mistake.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 15 May, 2013, 07:48:30 PM
Very sorry to hear about your worries and Troubles Tordels.  I really hope it all works out and you guys can get back on your feet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 May, 2013, 08:21:17 PM
Cheers, Fishy, although as noted these are indeed very minor impediments.

By way of an update, for those still conscious, today we finally got to speak to a human (or Turing-compliant facsimile) from our branch.  Who told us that our mortgage contact person had in fact taken early retirement, and they couldn't find any of our paperwork or correspondence, or any reference to the several meetings we'd had with her or pending appeals or payment  proposals or any of that stuff that we had sweated blood over.  Furthermore, they had never heard of our debt-collector friend or his company, and advised that we ignore him completely.  Which we had of course been doing. 

Of course I fully expect all this to be reversed in a matter of days when the left hand eventually has a chat with the right hand, and discovers that this is all some automated process from head office, but I'm pretty happy that this kind of FULLY DOCUMENTED FROM OUR END IN THE WAY ONLY AN ANAL RETENTIVE PARANOID FREAK CAN cock-up can only work in our favour in any future dealings, or grud forbid, court proceedings.  Certainly takes a bit of pressure off anyway.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 15 May, 2013, 10:17:05 PM
Christ, man. It's like Terry Gilliam's Brazil. You poor sod! :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 16 May, 2013, 02:06:18 PM
Good lord, it sounds like a shambles of a business.

So lucky to have escaped all that.  I know how fortunate we are that's for sure.

You have a good. Head on your shoulders Tordels.  I think it's more than a small impediment and it speaks volumes for you that you can take it on your stride.  Really hope you sort it all out.

As for me, been pretty poorly since the end of last year and had big struggles , related to the white cell flaw my dear daddy passed to me, but on a plus note it seems To be settling again for now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 19 May, 2013, 07:46:06 PM
I am sorry to read that Fishy, I hope your health improves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 23 May, 2013, 10:31:38 PM
I was told today that the issue with the MASSIVE water bills we all received here has taken a new and unpleasant twist.

We'd queried with the agency that, as far as we were aware, water rates were inclusive in our rent. We were told 'okay, fair play.'

Yesterday, we received a snotty letter from the agency telling us my grandma is in the clear, but our contract has apparently been 'deliberately re-worded so as to indicate that you are responsible for paying all water rates.'

One problem: we have a copy of our contract, and NO IT BLOODY WELL HAS NOT.

So, looks like we face the prospect of a drawn out wrangle with the agency. Either that, or the pay for the last four comics I've lettered gets ploughed into it... and then we get a nice shiny water meter into the bargain.

Nice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 24 May, 2013, 12:27:16 PM
(http://www.getgreatcodes.com/graphics/funny/16/funnypic171.gif)

I feel your pain HdE. Hope it works out in the end for you and your gran.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 May, 2013, 02:35:10 PM
Quote from: HdE on 23 May, 2013, 10:31:38 PM...but our contract has apparently been 'deliberately re-worded so as to indicate that you are responsible for paying all water rates.'

One problem: we have a copy of our contract, and NO IT BLOODY WELL HAS NOT.

Mind-numbing.  All people, everywhere, should be shot immediately, present company excepted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 24 May, 2013, 02:36:35 PM
Tordel, please don't post on this thread unless it's an update. When I saw your name as last poster, I thought: "Oh crap. What NOW?"

I thought some men had turned up at your door to remove your internal organs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 May, 2013, 04:08:24 PM
I like to keep you on your ventral fins, oh Trout.  Not every episode of Tordenders features someone getting pushed into Phil's inspection pit.  That's mainly the Christmas specials.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 24 May, 2013, 05:35:18 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 24 May, 2013, 12:27:16 PM
I feel your pain HdE. Hope it works out in the end for you and your gran.

Cheers, m'duck. As things presently stand, my gran's in the clear. We just have the wrangle over our own contract to endure.

Still at least we don't have the enormous amount of cash that was originally quoted hanging over our heads now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 24 May, 2013, 10:03:32 PM
WTF is this agency's game?  :-*
Hope all's sorted out soon hde, sounds like a right pain in the arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: michael kennedy on 25 May, 2013, 12:16:54 PM
spent hours attempting to set up wordpress.org yesterday (they claim it can take five minutes)

missed 'would i lie to you' and 'have i got news for you'

caught the graham norton show though

(http://25.media.tumblr.com/7e0630583d654a7acc27b79e82d8e783/tumblr_mncpuvAMDT1sp0kzeo1_500.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 25 May, 2013, 06:51:02 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 24 May, 2013, 10:03:32 PM
WTF is this agency's game?  :-*
Hope all's sorted out soon hde, sounds like a right pain in the arse.

Cheers for that, Hawky.

Latest development is, we have a meeting scheduled with the agents on Tuesday. We received a letter from the water provider today reminding us that payment was 'overdue'. This leads us to believe that the agency hasn't been as honest about their promise made earlier in the week to communicate with them as they'd like us to believe.

It's gonna be interesting, that's for sure.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 26 May, 2013, 11:40:14 AM
My flippin' front tooth fell out this morning!!

(Ill add its a bridge, before anyone thinks my teeth are as English as the rest of me, that's lasted a good five or six years since i last had it done. But still, it would choose to come out over the Bank Holiday, wouldnt it....  ::))
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 27 May, 2013, 04:56:49 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 26 May, 2013, 11:40:14 AM
My flippin' front tooth fell out this morning!!

(Ill add its a bridge, before anyone thinks my teeth are as English as the rest of me, that's lasted a good five or six years since i last had it done. But still, it would choose to come out over the Bank Holiday, wouldnt it....  ::))

Lets hope you don't have a Chris Benoit temperament to go with your matching smile!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 27 May, 2013, 08:57:52 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 27 May, 2013, 04:56:49 PM
Lets hope you don't have a Chris Benoit temperament to go with your matching smile!  :D


I do have a Kill list Link, but dont worry, your not on it,  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 27 May, 2013, 09:30:52 PM
Developed a frozen shoulder today. Very painful. To cap it off, in my factory based dayjob, our three man team is down to two for the next couple of weeks, so taking it easy isn't much of an option. :-/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 28 May, 2013, 01:10:54 AM
I share your pain Darren. I have a problem with a frozen shoulder for years. Well at least I think that's what it is. First started after an idiotic demonstration by someone at the karate club. I wouldn't say it keeps recurring – more a case of it hasn't fully healed. I was in extreme pain a couple of years ago when it was triggered off following a 14 hour work shift at the computer with bad posture. Went to the doc but my appointment letter for physio never materialised and I never chased that up. Also suffering with what I think is tendonitis in forearm. Knees giving me gip as well. Think I will need some bionics in the knees at some stage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 28 May, 2013, 05:47:51 AM
Ouch! Yeh, I have a few knee issues, too. Must be old age, ha. Luckily the olkd shoulder feels a bit better this morning. Very tender, but not as raw as the last couple of days.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 28 May, 2013, 06:18:46 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 27 May, 2013, 09:30:52 PM
Developed a frozen shoulder today. Very painful.

I've had that a few times. Not nice at all. Get a bag of peas out of the freezer and put it on your shoulder for a while, that'll help it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 29 May, 2013, 10:23:48 AM
I tried that once but - the chip kept getting in the way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 29 May, 2013, 12:19:36 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 28 May, 2013, 05:47:51 AM
Ouch! Yeh, I have a few knee issues, too. Must be old age, ha. Luckily the olkd shoulder feels a bit better this morning. Very tender, but not as raw as the last couple of days.  :D

I recommend a sports massage.  they are so painful it'll take your mind off the pain in your shoulder.  ::)

Seriously though, I suffered from a frozen shoulder for a week, had a sports massage last week, and it has pretty much sorted it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 29 May, 2013, 03:00:10 PM
Thanks for the suggestions! Luckily, It's feeling a lot better. Just a dull ache now, like a healing bruise. Might try the massage thing next time, though I'll probably snap in two, heh.  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 May, 2013, 03:46:38 PM
It's not the weekend yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 29 May, 2013, 03:47:37 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 May, 2013, 03:46:38 PM
It's not the weekend yet.

"Soon"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 29 May, 2013, 03:54:31 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 29 May, 2013, 03:47:37 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 May, 2013, 03:46:38 PM
It's not the weekend yet.

"Soon"

LIKE
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 29 May, 2013, 03:58:03 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 May, 2013, 03:54:31 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 29 May, 2013, 03:47:37 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 29 May, 2013, 03:46:38 PM
It's not the weekend yet.

"Soon"

LIKE

ALSO LIKE.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 29 May, 2013, 04:24:37 PM
Because I had a surgical procedure yesterday and still have a large bit of surgical tape around my arm. This shit is like superglue - just tearing it off in one go would probably do some serious damage, not to mention be agonisingly painful, and it's starting to itch like hell!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 29 May, 2013, 05:07:02 PM
My little sister drew a large breasted women on my arm cast. Take that as you will.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 10 June, 2013, 05:07:23 PM
Come back for a brief visit to the board after getting board of the internet to find the underwear thread locked.
Thank you P.C.
I am off again see you in another few weeks.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 10 June, 2013, 05:13:23 PM
Context be damned!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 10 June, 2013, 06:19:25 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 10 June, 2013, 05:07:23 PM
Come back for a brief visit to the board after getting board of the internet to find the underwear thread locked.
Thank you P.C.
I am off again see you in another few weeks.

You do know the internet has other websites featuring nothing but ladies in their underwear, right?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 10 June, 2013, 06:20:36 PM
And sometimes not even underware(sic)...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 June, 2013, 06:57:07 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 10 June, 2013, 06:19:25 PM
You do know the internet has other websites featuring nothing but ladies in their underwear, right?

But it's so much harder to affect a knowing air of ironic detachment and a-reading-it-for-the-articles when you have to type 'pretty ladies in their pants please' into Google. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 10 June, 2013, 08:27:25 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 10 June, 2013, 06:57:07 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 10 June, 2013, 06:19:25 PM
You do know the internet has other websites featuring nothing but ladies in their underwear, right?

But it's so much harder to affect a knowing air of ironic detachment and a-reading-it-for-the-articles when you have to type 'pretty ladies in their pants please' into Google.

I just typed that into Google (for research you understand)

2nd on the list was this: Why Women Shouldn't Wear Pants (http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Evils%20in%20America/Porno/pants_on_women.htm)

Not quite what I was expecting...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 10 June, 2013, 08:33:58 PM
Americans are silly. 'Pants' is one of the all-time great comedy words, but not if you use it to mean 'trousers.'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 June, 2013, 09:12:41 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 10 June, 2013, 08:33:58 PM
Americans are silly. 'Pants' is one of the all-time great comedy words, but not if you use it to mean 'trousers.'

See also: fanny.  Ahem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 10 June, 2013, 10:54:44 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 10 June, 2013, 06:20:36 PM
And sometimes not even underware(sic)...
What fresh madness is this?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 10 June, 2013, 11:11:29 PM
^^^ Don't try playing the innocent forum member here, Mr Hawk'- I draw your attention to...
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 29 May, 2013, 05:07:02 PM
My little sister drew a large breasted women on my arm cast.
Translation: I haven't been hiding my rudey magazines as good as I should lately...!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 11 June, 2013, 08:45:35 AM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 10 June, 2013, 11:11:29 PM
^^^ Don't try playing the innocent forum member here, Mr Hawk'- I draw your attention to...
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 29 May, 2013, 05:07:02 PM
My little sister drew a large breasted women on my arm cast.
Translation: I haven't been hiding my rudey magazines as good as I should lately...!
No, why have I been PAYING for my kicks if it's on the web for FREE?! Why have you forsaken me lord?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 June, 2013, 11:45:23 AM
Despite telling myself not to get too excited about the prospect, I am pretty miffed that I wont be going to work in Switzerland for a couple of months and am now having to amend all the plans I had for spending my boatloads of imaginary money.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 13 June, 2013, 01:06:00 AM
Hayfever = Insomnia
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 13 June, 2013, 05:03:15 PM
I have to go to India...for the weekend.
4 days away, 2.5 of them travelling. Sigh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 13 June, 2013, 05:17:05 PM
Took me about an hour to do one of Jamie Oliver's 15 minute meals.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 June, 2013, 07:09:31 PM
Quote from: Banners on 13 June, 2013, 05:17:05 PM
Took me about an hour to do one of Jamie Oliver's 15 minute meals.

My mother got that book for Christmas, flicked through it with the eye of experience while laughing quietly, and then gave it to me.  You're doing better than I ever managed, Banners.  The prep alone has taken me over an hour, but that's supposedly okay, because the titular 15 minutes doesn't actually start until you start heating things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 13 June, 2013, 10:16:38 PM
Heh.

There's the washing up too. And you also have to add on the many hours spent looking around the supermarket for the very obscure and highly expensive ingredients Mr Oliver assumes we already have in our cupboards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 13 June, 2013, 11:43:16 PM
I have managed to get two thirds of one of his thirty minute meals down to forty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 14 June, 2013, 09:13:57 AM
Based on my experience, the "15 minutes" is what it takes to eat the meal. I don't suppose a book called "Jamie Oliver's It Takes Bloody Ages Just To Find The Sodding Ingredients, Nevermind Chopping And Cooking The Damn Thing Meals" would sell too well...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 14 June, 2013, 09:38:02 AM
Because fucking PMS - the bane of my existence!

Why why why does almost every single month, my girlfriend moves out for a week and a foul-tempered little goblin moves in to take her place? It is like walking on eggshells the entire time, and there is literally nothing I can do to avoid it. It's all very well saying "be calm and understanding", but frankly I think even the most serene Zen Buddhist would be contemplating throwing themselves through the nearest window within 20 minutes of walking in the door. I have often got to the point of actually Googling nearby hotels so I can get some respite for an evening.

The worst thing about it is she doesn't ever seem to acknowledge it, even after the fact, and when she's in that mood - everything else comes second, and she thinks nothing of shouting at the top of her voice and slamming doors first thing in the morning for all the world (and our neighbors) to hear.

I'm sure most of you can relate!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 June, 2013, 11:01:58 AM
"So drink of your pint, boys, and thank your shamrocks
That as menfolk we don't have to bleed from our cocks"

My missus gets the sharp end of my chronic depression nearly as often, so I'm in no place to complain about what all those hateful biochemicals do to the noggin.  It does seem like an unnecessarily shitty and largely intractable way to run a reproductive system for those involved, but as for the innocent bystander: that's what sheds are for.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 14 June, 2013, 05:51:58 PM
Personally I have more sympathy with your Mrs, Radiator, knowing how awful it feels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 June, 2013, 06:10:35 PM
Period pains? Pah! Try shaving every day! Get a cut under your nose and it's like trying to plug a hole in the ocean bed, that much liquid matter come's out!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 14 June, 2013, 06:18:49 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 14 June, 2013, 06:10:35 PM
Period pains? Pah! Try shaving every day! Get a cut under your nose and it's like trying to plug a hole in the ocean bed, that much liquid matter come's out!

You're doing it wrong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 14 June, 2013, 06:40:27 PM
Some grim news for the male boarders: Men to blame for Menopause (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-22886668)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 14 June, 2013, 06:44:56 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 14 June, 2013, 05:51:58 PM
Personally I have more sympathy with your Mrs, Radiator, knowing how awful it feels.

Indeed. Gotta say, Radiator, that's an astonishing lack of empathy you're showing to another human being in pain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 June, 2013, 06:48:35 PM
Quote from: El Pops on 14 June, 2013, 06:18:49 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 14 June, 2013, 06:10:35 PM
Period pains? Pah! Try shaving every day! Get a cut under your nose and it's like trying to plug a hole in the ocean bed, that much liquid matter come's out!

You're doing it wrong.
Is it not the blunt end of the razor blade used? SAVAGES!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 June, 2013, 07:14:10 PM
My first short story:  REJECTED. Clunky and repetitive in places, dodgy ending.  Ah well, at least my proof-reading mate loved it (and he wasn't just saying.  I hope.).
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 14 June, 2013, 10:58:51 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 14 June, 2013, 06:44:56 PM
Indeed. Gotta say, Radiator, that's an astonishing lack of empathy you're showing to another human being in pain.

Nah, I can totally see where he's coming from. My girlfriend went through a *long* phase where I seriously considered ending our relationship, so unpleasant was her company around that special time. You can be supportive and considerate up to a point, but sooner or later, she has to take responsibility for her actions and face the fact that she's behaving unreasonably.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:11:17 AM
Thanks for the backup.

I wasn't going to elaborate, but Richmond - very easy for you to say that, but believe me when I say that I am NOT just talking about a bit of grumpiness and sulking here. I could deal with that no problem. I'm not really prepared to go into details here, but it is often truly unbearable. I don't say that lightly.

Genuinely interested to hear other people's experiences, or tips for getting through it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 15 June, 2013, 12:41:57 AM
Quote from: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:11:17 AM
Genuinely interested to hear other people's experiences, or tips for getting through it.

Chocolate.

I'm not an expert on women or relationships, but I did grow up as the only boy out of four children, and have been living with the same girl for 8 years now, and even though I don't don't know the emotional complexities of your relationship, I can tell you that chocolate will probably play a part in the solution.

If you're looking for advice, I probably can't tell you anything you haven't heard before. Try to be accommodating and understanding, and if that gets thrown back in your face, being a bit pissed off about the whole thing is perfectly understandable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 15 June, 2013, 10:34:18 AM
Women get PMT but some easily forget that they're not the only person suffering as a result of it.

Someone who's in pain expects sympathy & empathy ... but what about the poor sod having to live with tyrannical emotional abuse?

My wife suffered from depression for a number of years.  Very, very, shite for her, being battered by her own head 24-hours-a-day.  But also shite for me, because I'd crawl home knackered from a 12-hour day, only to face a barrage of mood swings, irrational arguments & tantrums (and slobbish mess to clean up), and take double-the-hit shielding the kids from it too.

I have every sympathy for you, Radiator.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 11:09:02 AM
That's just it.

Look, I can totally understand how to some I am coming across as a whinging, unsympathetic self-centered pig, but I really cannot overstate how bad it can get from time to time. It really is inescapable and inevitable. Relentless, full-on temper tantrums (that I had previously thought only toddlers capable of) that can last until 2,3 or even 4am - often when we both have to be up for work in the morning. And that's not even the half of it. No amount of 'apologising' (for entirely imagined slights), understanding, pleading or - as a last resort - indifference can do a thing to calm things down. Several entire holidays have been completely ruined by it.

I also cannot overstate what a wonderful, vibrant, inspiring and caring woman she is the other 75% of the time.

It sucks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 15 June, 2013, 11:22:34 AM
One women suffers from PMT. One man suffers the consequences.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 15 June, 2013, 11:36:23 AM
Sorry to hear about your troubles Radiator mate....and sorry as well for the agonies your partner is going through...
But honestly,  it sounds more like Depression 'triggered' by that awful time of the month, other than 'just' PMT....( which in itself is bad enough )....
If it is Depression, you have my deepest sympathies, as my Mrs had / still has that,  and I'm afraid it's absolutely devastating to any relationship......
If it is Depression she needs to go to the Doctors ASAP......and that is going to be difficult for her as well......
She needs constant support here Mate......but unfortunately that may not be enough....
Good luck and Best Wishes to you both...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 June, 2013, 11:46:27 AM
Quote from: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 11:09:02 AMRelentless, full-on temper tantrums (that I had previously thought only toddlers capable of) that can last until 2,3 or even 4am - often when we both have to be up for work in the morning. And that's not even the half of it. No amount of 'apologising' (for entirely imagined slights), understanding, pleading or - as a last resort - indifference can do a thing to calm things down. Several entire holidays have been completely ruined by it.

See, you could be talking about me there on not-infrequent occasion, and while I am working towards a fine set of boobs I am not a woman.  As a result you have my sincere sympathy - how my partner has put up with almost a quarter century of that shite I have no idea, and just like your GF I resolutely refuse to seek or accept help before, during or after, meaning the whole thing repeats, admittedly at unpredictable and more widely-spaced intervals.  This is despite my wife's unflagging support and sympathy, none of which do a jot a good at the time, and her obvious quiet suffering, which generally makes thing worse.

It's always struck me that the worst aspects of PMS are so close to aspects of the depression cycle that the general failure to equate the two is baffling.  That one is supposedly a normal consequence of essential bodily function with a specific timing, and the other an aberrant mental illness with a more open-ended runtime seems like a category problem rather than any real difference in the effects on lives.  You would of course be on a hiding to nowhere suggesting that severe PMS such as you describe should be addressed as mental illness, since the latter still labours under a massive stigma that no healthy person is going to appreciate having waved at them.  However, people, including those for whom this is a 'natural, normal, healthy' part of biological function, should not have to suffer like this, and nor should their loved ones.  Who's being sympathetic or empathetic doesn't come into it, since it rarely makes any ruddy difference.

There really should be a way to deal with this for everyone's sakes, that doesn't simply equate to 'chocolate, and keep your head down', or my personal position of 'thank feck I'm a man'.  Fucked if I know what it is, though.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:02:19 PM
Thanks chaps, but I really, really don't think it's that - as I say she is absolutely, 100% fine most of the time. Proper life and soul of the party type; outgoing, confident, warm, driven, utterly incapable of lying or deceit... the complete opposite of me, really ;). And trust me, this definitely isn't just a front masking or overcompensating for some latent depression or sadness.

In all honesty I've been looking into: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Premenstrual_dysphoric_disorder (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Premenstrual_dysphoric_disorder)

...but I suppose the first step is getting her to see that it's a real thing - the problem is that she is always able to somehow justify her outrageous behaviour, and convince herself that it's just as much my fault as it is hers (she has perhaps acknowledged/owned up to 10% of the problem after years of me trying to get through to her about it), and by the time the cycle finally calms down, the absolute last thing I want to do is bring it all up again!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 June, 2013, 12:06:24 PM
That looks promising, Radiator, although I do cringe to see Prozac at the head of the list of possible treatments...  I find myself unhappily akin to antivaxers when it comes to that stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:18:03 PM
QuoteThat looks promising, Radiator, although I do cringe to see Prozac at the head of the list of possible treatments...

Quite.

Interestingly, a close friend of mine recently told me that his wife had always suffered from quite extreme and uncontrollable PMS, and that the symptoms had almost completely been brought under control after her stopping taking the pill. Can only find broadly anecdotal evidence of this online though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 June, 2013, 12:28:21 PM
So Thought Bubble and MCM Birmingham Comic Con are on over the same weekend!

There will be between 20-40 Judges on patrol at Birmingham, what do I do!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 15 June, 2013, 12:49:36 PM
Book out Justice One for the day, and do both?
Phil Collins at Live Aid managed a similar feat, and anything Phil Collins can do.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 15 June, 2013, 12:51:37 PM
I'll just be at Thought Bubble, so will miss that little brigade. :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 June, 2013, 12:59:58 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 June, 2013, 12:28:21 PM
There will be between 20-40 Judges on patrol at Birmingham, what do I do!

WWJDD?

Or to put it another way, how would Justice best be served?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 15 June, 2013, 02:04:15 PM
Quote from: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:18:03 PMQuite.

Interestingly, a close friend of mine recently told me that his wife had always suffered from quite extreme and uncontrollable PMS, and that the symptoms had almost completely been brought under control after her stopping taking the pill. Can only find broadly anecdotal evidence of this online though.

A woman I know was advised to go on the pill. As the Doctor was prescribing it to her she said, don't use the pill as an excuse to be in a bad mood or give out to her partner. She went off the pill eventually as she felt it really was affecting her moods.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 15 June, 2013, 02:11:26 PM
Quote from: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:11:17 AM
Thanks for the backup.

I wasn't going to elaborate, but Richmond - very easy for you to say that, but believe me when I say that I am NOT just talking about a bit of grumpiness and sulking here. I could deal with that no problem. I'm not really prepared to go into details here, but it is often truly unbearable. I don't say that lightly.

Genuinely interested to hear other people's experiences, or tips for getting through it.

Really? Easy for me is it? And you know of my own personal experiences how?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 15 June, 2013, 02:17:32 PM
Just to intergect, I felt Radiator was refering to your perception of HIS instance, not his perception of your own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 15 June, 2013, 02:20:06 PM
Quote from: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:02:19 PM
...but I suppose the first step is getting her to see that it's a real thing - the problem is that she is always able to somehow justify her outrageous behaviour, and convince herself that it's just as much my fault as it is hers (she has perhaps acknowledged/owned up to 10% of the problem after years of me trying to get through to her about it), and by the time the cycle finally calms down, the absolute last thing I want to do is bring it all up again!
...

Yes, seen all that before as well......and it's so difficult to 'bring the subject up again' when all has settled down......As you do not want to 'provoke' more arguments... This is so typical of the 'cyclic' behaviour associated with aspects of Depression.....
In my case, my wife is a Nurse, and adamantly believes that she would recognise the 'symptoms' if she had them, as she has seen people with Depression who are much worse than her, so therefore it can't be that......And therefore it must be mine, or someone else's 'fault'.....When to be honest there is 'no fault' with anyone....It is an illness..
Despite the fact that my Wife's behaviour is much like your partners...ie...Almost manic outbursts of uncontrollable anger, illogical behaviour, tiredness, letting normal household 'chores' go...( messy as opposed to her normal very tidy self ), extreme periods of 'touchiness' and other periods of 'highs' / really 'happy' times.....She still refuses to acknowledge that she is ill....and that has been one of the hardest parts of it all...

Some very good points from Tordleback as well about the 'refusal' to accept / admit / get help for a problem which is unfortunately very badly 'stigmatised' as 'Mental Illness'.....My wife is now on anti-depressants and this has alleviated some of the 'symptoms'...or 'masked them' slightly, so life is a bit more bearable now for both of us...Not Prozac I hasten to add, although they do induce a slight 'lethargy'....But the problem is still there,  and I can't see a solution to it either.....

Sincerely mate....Best Wishes to both of you.
Cheers..
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 16 June, 2013, 01:00:10 AM
Quote from: radiator on 15 June, 2013, 12:18:03 PM
Interestingly, a close friend of mine recently told me that his wife had always suffered from quite extreme and uncontrollable PMS, and that the symptoms had almost completely been brought under control after her stopping taking the pill. Can only find broadly anecdotal evidence of this online though.

As it happens, that's what "fixed" my girlfriend. She stopped taking the pill and became a lot more pleasant to be around. After a long layoff (12 months or so), she was prescribed a different type of pill and - so far - seems to be getting along more or less fine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 16 June, 2013, 11:26:43 AM
I work with someone that gets PMS and its really fucking annoying. The problem is that the managers are embarrassed to do anything about it.
It's really bad some months, with everyone getting both barrels at the drop of the hat and one member of stuff being bullied, basically.
Now I can see that it may be awful for the woman involved but, in a professional setting, she has the responsibility to act in a professional manner.
I can see that I probably sound unsympathetic but I can totally see Radiator's problem must be excruciating to deal with and the crux of it, for me, is when he says that she won't admit to it even after the fact.
I always thought the first step in dealing with a problem was to first admit that you have a problem?

I'd be interested to know if Radiator's girlfriend has problems in the workplace because of this or if she manages to keep a lid on it until she gets home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 June, 2013, 12:06:57 PM
It seems to be laser-targeted at me - she is able to conceal it perfectly fine when with friends. I don't know how it impacts on her work as I don't see it first-hand, but I really hope not.

That's very, very interesting to hear NB. A few months ago i actually managed to talk her into casually asking a doctor about it, but they basically said "oh, its nothing to do with the pill", and talked her out of changing anything as doing so can come with its own complications, which was extremely disappointing.

The cycle is always the same - she goads me into losing my temper, so I end up saying and doing things I regret (I try my best to keep calm, but when someone is shouting at you for two hours straight when all you want to do is go to sleep...), and then I become the bad guy. It's then IMPOSSIBLE to get her to realise that it is ALWAYS her that engineers the whole thing in the first place, and that she has a serious problem. Now, I realise that sounds a bit like "you started it!", but seriously - I'm a very placid guy. As I said I hate confrontation and will always try and walk away from an argument.

I just don't know what to do, really. This weekend has been utterly horrendous, probably worse than its ever been before.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 16 June, 2013, 12:23:03 PM
There's not much you can do if she doesn't admit to having a problem.
I'd probably just go and stay at a mate's place or get a hotel - I seriously wouldn't be able to put up with it, so you're a better man than I am already.
I guess I might ask her to write down what she thinks I've done wrong, and then show it to her a couple of weeks later to see if she still thinks it sounds reasonable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 16 June, 2013, 12:26:58 PM
Don't tolerate it. Happy relationship most of the time or not, if she has a problem that she won't admit to you don't owe her the courtesy of putting up with it. As James said, stay with a mate for a while and let her get it out of her system/ realise she does need help.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 16 June, 2013, 12:28:41 PM
Sorry to double post but something constructive you could possibly do is talk to her mum or a sister or auntie.
These things often run in the family and they may have some helpful advice.
It would probably be an uncomfortable conversation but if they can see you have her best interests at heart they have no reason to be offended.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 16 June, 2013, 12:48:50 PM
Quote from: radiator on 16 June, 2013, 12:06:57 PM
I just don't know what to do, really. This weekend has been utterly horrendous, probably worse than its ever been before.

Assuming you can have a sensible enough discussion about trying to improve the situation, I can't recommend St John's Wort highly enough. I'm not a big believer in traditional/herbal remedies, but my wife's a different person when she takes it, having previously been somewhat difficult to live with when visitations from PMS goblin were occurring.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 16 June, 2013, 01:57:23 PM
I'm really sorry to sound 'negative' here...but I'm not trying to be, just looking at the 'problem' logically....
And I'm speaking from experience here...( over the last 5 years )

Your Situation: 
Its getting worse....and it seems to have been going on for a while...
It's always your fault...
There is nothing 'wrong' with her...You are the cause of all arguments and problems...
She refuses to admit there is a problem and will not get / or seek help....
Every month ( or so ) it comes around again and you are the bad guy again...

Picture this scenario continuing for another few years, without any real change.....

The point is ( and you obviously care for her, and wish things were different ) ....If things don't change, the feelings you have for her will ( eventually ), change, as no one can live like this forever, and your relationship will deteriorate to the extent that neither of you will want it to continue.....

Try explaining this to her in the most sympathetic way you can.....And that you are willing to help / do what you can to make things better....If that involves Relationship Advice sessions, say you are willing to give that a go, and anything else to help her ( and you ) overcome and resolve this 'problem'.......
If she still won't seek help, or admit that 'jointly' you have a problem......Then it's going to be up to you as to how long you are prepared to live like this.....It's obviously making you miserable, she is obviously unhappy as well, so unless you 'want' or are 'prepared to continue to live with / accept' this 'cycle' of behaviours it's going to be time to decide....
Sorry mate....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 16 June, 2013, 02:09:20 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 14 June, 2013, 07:14:10 PM
My first short story:  REJECTED. Clunky and repetitive in places, dodgy ending.  Ah well, at least my proof-reading mate loved it (and he wasn't just saying.  I hope.).
Wouldn't worry about that one too much, mate. Stephen King mentions in that On Writing book of his a large nail he had sticking out of his wall that he managed to cover in reject letters. And now look at him- he's had loads of things published that should have been rejected since those early days!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 16 June, 2013, 07:42:27 PM
Actually Radiator, once you started explaining a bit more I immediately started thinking about PMDD too. I'm lucky in that I don't get really bad PMS but I have polycystic ovaries which means a whole other range of problems. Both conditions are affected by imbalanced hormones and I know someone who started one pill, the PMDD went beserk so they started a different type of pill and her symptoms eased. It isn't the standard model of depression as most of the time the sufferer is okay - just that one week or two a month when life is utterly unbearable.

She must know that even at best she has really, really bad PMS and it really doesn't have to be that way. There are things a doc can do and she can feel less wretched. She may well have had less than sympathetic doctors who didn't listen before. It took me over 10 years to get some of my gynae problems diagnosed. So she should keep trying until someone takes her seriously.

Jayzus - keep trying! Loads of writers seem to paper their rooms with rejection slips - it comes up regularly in interviews. Just input the phrase into a search engine and see. However if you keep going you'll get there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 16 June, 2013, 09:38:05 PM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 16 June, 2013, 02:09:20 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 14 June, 2013, 07:14:10 PM
My first short story:  REJECTED. Clunky and repetitive in places, dodgy ending.  Ah well, at least my proof-reading mate loved it (and he wasn't just saying.  I hope.).
Wouldn't worry about that one too much, mate. Stephen King mentions in that On Writing book of his a large nail he had sticking out of his wall that he managed to cover in reject letters. And now look at him- he's had loads of things published that should have been rejected since those early days!

Cheers!  You're right about Stephen King, too, Needful Things was the last one I read and it was pretty shite.  Mind you, he can be really good too. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 16 June, 2013, 09:47:24 PM
Yes Jayzus....Keep going.....

As for Mr King, while having done some truly wonderful stuff over the years,  there have been several recently, that I feel were only printed ' because of who he is'  and not necessarily for the content....
His characterisation is still superb and writing excellent...it's just some of the ideas are a little clichéd ...
Hopefully that will all change as he 're-visits' Daniel Torrance ( from The Shining ) 20 years on, in his latest novel Dr Sleep.....due out in September, I think....

Anyway, keep going and hope to see you in print soon.
Cheers..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 16 June, 2013, 11:07:56 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 16 June, 2013, 09:38:05 PM
Cheers!  You're right about Stephen King, too, Needful Things was the last one I read and it was pretty shite.  Mind you, he can be really good too.
Twice now I've finished reading a King offering and said I'd never read anything of his again*; this time, I intend to stick to it!
And as for you- Sideshow Bob- you only count seven titles of King's that were only published due to his name? I say you haven't read enough Stephen King, sir!
Didn't know his Shining sequel was due out so soon. You'll have to let me know via the What's Everyone Reading thread what you think about it, I'm staying well clear. Sounds a little desperate to me... and I've swore to never read a King offering again.
*re-reads not included.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 17 June, 2013, 12:45:09 AM
Sorry Charlie boy,
I didn't say seven, I said several...of his novels that were only published due to his name.... :D,
but without listing them,  of the 'top of my head',  I would say that figure is about right.....Must admit though I'm not including his Dark Tower series of novels ....as I've not read them.
I've read almost everything else, and accept it must be really hard to keep up the very high standard that he set with his earlier books.......Don't get me wrong I still love his characterisation and his writing never fails to 'draw me in',  it's just I think he's running out of ideas on the Supernatural / Horror side..

I've read The Talisman and the follow up The Black House with Peter Straub  ( which kind of touch on the whole 'Gunslinger / Dark Tower' saga ) but despite enjoying both of them, I've never been inclined to try The Dark Tower series......

I really am looking forward to the 're-visit' and follow up to The Shining....( Dr Sleep ) and will definitely let you know via What's everyone Reading thread once I've read it......And here's hoping it's a solid return to form of old......

By the way, I really quite enjoyed his recent 11.22.63.......Not a 'horror' story as such, more a gentler 'supernatural / time travel' type thing but interesting enough....
Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 June, 2013, 12:14:12 PM
Quote from: radiator on 16 June, 2013, 12:06:57 PM
The cycle is always the same - she goads me into losing my temper, so I end up saying and doing things I regret (I try my best to keep calm, but when someone is shouting at you for two hours straight when all you want to do is go to sleep

Well this bit is definitely within your power to fix.  So I'd start on this.  Probably a good idea to pursue the other avenues as well though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 17 June, 2013, 12:51:17 PM
Quote from: radiator on 16 June, 2013, 12:06:57 PM
It seems to be laser-targeted at me - she is able to conceal it perfectly fine when with friends. I don't know how it impacts on her work as I don't see it first-hand, but I really hope not.

That's very, very interesting to hear NB. A few months ago i actually managed to talk her into casually asking a doctor about it, but they basically said "oh, its nothing to do with the pill", and talked her out of changing anything as doing so can come with its own complications, which was extremely disappointing.

The cycle is always the same - she goads me into losing my temper, so I end up saying and doing things I regret (I try my best to keep calm, but when someone is shouting at you for two hours straight when all you want to do is go to sleep...), and then I become the bad guy. It's then IMPOSSIBLE to get her to realise that it is ALWAYS her that engineers the whole thing in the first place, and that she has a serious problem. Now, I realise that sounds a bit like "you started it!", but seriously - I'm a very placid guy. As I said I hate confrontation and will always try and walk away from an argument.

I just don't know what to do, really. This weekend has been utterly horrendous, probably worse than its ever been before.

I feel your pain, truly I do, as I suffered in a very similar manner for about 10-12 years.  I completely understand the whole thing about switching it on for you, and off in social situations.  There were so many times she'd have a massive go at me for minor infringements of some rule she'd previously laid down (always her rules, never mine) just as we were about to step out teh door.

It would leave me in a massively confused, upset and angry mess, so when we met our friends she was all happiness and light, and I was still reeling from the bollocking.  As a result, to the eyes of those around us it looked like the issues lay with me!

I can give many, many, MANY examples of how the ex inflicted her anger on me, how she controlled my every movements, how she treated me with continual paranoia, suspicion and contempt, but I can't be arsed. 

Anyway, cut a long story short, coming up to my fortieth I had to ask myself 'can I deal with another decade of this?'.  The answer was a resounding 'no'... so I left.  It was the single hardest decision of my life, particularly as we had three kids, but I was at the end of my tether.  Every other attempt to sort things out had failed. 

The end result is I am actually really fucking happy now, and enjoying my life!

I don't know if that helps you at all, but I thought I'd put that out there - sometimes the only solution is to just get the hell out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 17 June, 2013, 01:19:37 PM
QuoteWell this bit is definitely within your power to fix.  So I'd start on this.  Probably a good idea to pursue the other avenues as well though.

I wish that was the case, I really do.

The truth is, all she actually wants is an argument, and she won't stop until she has it - even if she doesn't conciously acknowledge the fact. I don't really want to go into any more detail than that - other than to say that it continues for hours and generally involves depriving me of sleep - but I cannot stress enough that it is unavoidable. It starts with some utterly trivial crime I have commited - say forgetting to buy bread or something like that, and just spirals from there. She is a master at getting under my skin and engineering a blazing row.

Short of dosing myself with a shit-tonne of valium before walking in the door, I honestly don't know how to not rise to it. Eventually, you just get to a breaking point and snap - then she's done it - I'm down on her level and every bit as responsible as her for the argument.

I would defy anyone to be able to put up with it for hours at a time and not lose it.

I must stress this happens on average perhaps once every couple of months - only when she is in a very specific state of mind, but the resulting fallout and bad feeling from such an incident can last for up to a week where we will avoid each other completely, her getting more and more resentful with every hour that passes.

Shaolin - believe me I have considered it, but things are so good most of the time I kind of blank it out, and find it hard to comprehend that we could argue in such a way, and then suddenly I get the tell-tail phonecall - it's that magical time again and it all goes to shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 June, 2013, 01:28:53 PM
It is definitely in your power.  She's providing the stimulus. You, and only you, get to decide what the response will be. 

It is spectacularly hard (still, easier than other options) - and I won't go into specifics either- but when you do manage to defuse a situation without rising to the bait, boy does it feel good.

It doesn't mean it'll be twine and roses the next time but at least you know you can do it - which also makes it worth persevering with. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 17 June, 2013, 01:52:26 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 17 June, 2013, 12:51:17 PM
I completely understand the whole thing about switching it on for you, and off in social situations.  There were so many times she'd have a massive go at me for minor infringements of some rule she'd previously laid down (always her rules, never mine) just as we were about to step out the door.

It would leave me in a massively confused, upset and angry mess, so when we met our friends she was all happiness and light, and I was still reeling from the bollocking.  As a result, to the eyes of those around us it looked like the issues lay with me!


Wow !!..... :o
I thought that only happened to me.....So true......Our friends now know differently, as I'm no longer there and her behaviour is still 'unpredictable'.....
But, it's just another way of her, 'manipulating' the situation......just the same as your infringement of some rule / something you've done or not done.....In other words as you say Radiator,  she 'Wants' an argument, and I'm sorry,  but no amount of calm, reasoned and measured response on your behalf is going to work...UNTIL she gets the 'argument' she wants.......

I've said more about my own personal situation here than I had meant to.....so going to drop out of this thread now...
Sincerely,
Good Luck and Best Wishes Radiator....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 17 June, 2013, 02:15:25 PM
QuoteIt is definitely in your power.  She's providing the stimulus. You, and only you, get to decide what the response will be.

It is spectacularly hard (still, easier than other options) - and I won't go into specifics either- but when you do manage to defuse a situation without rising to the bait, boy does it feel good.

It doesn't mean it'll be twine and roses the next time but at least you know you can do it - which also makes it worth persevering with.

But how?

There is no reasoning with her, because she's not being the least bit reasonable or rational, and everything I say just gets twisted into yet more ammunition for her to use against me.

I can't really apologise for what I have done, because it is intrinsically not a genuine apology, and is thrown back in my face. The original argument quickly becomes ever more exaggerated, convoluted and obscure to the point where I genuinely no longer even know what we're arguing about or how to go about unravelling it all. Even if I manage to appease her on one point, she simply moves the goalposts and shifts the parameters of the argument to something else.

If I try and ignore her or feign indifference, that similarly just adds fuel to the fire.

If I go into another room, she follows me. If I try and pick up a book/iPad/whatever, it is snatched out of my hand.

I can sometimes make her laugh by making her realise how ridiculous she is being or by making stupid faces, which defuses the situation momentarily, but seconds later she will explode into rage with an even fiercer aggression than before.

I can't leave, because as I said before I can't aimlessly wander around London late at night and be mugging-bait. And besides, she will invariably just stand in my way to prevent me from leaving.

It also invariably happens when I am particulalry vulnerable - early in the morning, very late at night, or when I am extremely tired or stressed out about something else. It can escalate dizzyingly quickly and catch me off guard.

The same doggedness, drive and stubbornness I admire so much in her character in 'real life' becomes terrifying and irresistible when it is ranged against me in this way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 June, 2013, 03:15:23 PM
If she's hiding her behavior from others, goading you into action and dismissing notions that things need to be managed or changed on her side of things, that suggests she's manipulating you into seeing yourself as the problem.  I am only viewing this from the outside and going by what you have said here, but it strikes me that this is an abusive relationship.

You need to either work this out between yourselves or you need to leave.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 June, 2013, 03:29:42 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 17 June, 2013, 03:15:23 PM... but it strikes me that this is an abusive relationship.

Hang on there Prof, as I understand it from Radiator's posts here the point is that this behaviour is directly linked to horrendous PMS - I don't think it's a case of rational manipulation of a partner, it's a mental problem with an apparent biological cause.  If that can be successfully addressed it's to everyone's advantage (speaking as nutjob myself).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 17 June, 2013, 03:44:02 PM
Yeah, the funny thing is is that I genuinely believe there isn't any malice in it - she genuinely believes all the stuff she comes out with. It genuinely is like a temporary madness.

I should stress that she apologises for her actions afterwards, and knows it was out of order, but believes that the problem is with both of us and doesn't see that pattern of how it always happens, even in retrospect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 June, 2013, 04:10:52 PM
Sorry, I didn't mean to overstep there.
Obviously I don't know either party or your individual circumstances, so if you think she has a valid reason to act this way and you're willing to let it continue it's not my place to butt in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 17 June, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 17 June, 2013, 04:10:52 PM
Obviously I don't know either party or your individual circumstances [...] it's not my place to butt in.

You know this is the internet, right?

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 17 June, 2013, 04:23:16 PM
QuoteSorry, I didn't mean to overstep there.
Obviously I don't know either party or your individual circumstances, so if you think she has a valid reason to act this way and you're willing to let it continue it's not my place to butt in.

Not at all - there was obviously no offense intended, and I appreciate your honesty.

I was very much hesitant to bring any of this up in the first place, but reasoned that one or two of you would have experience of something similar, and the advice, and just the chance to discuss it relatively openly has been very appreciated. Most of our friends are mutual friends so it can be awkward, or even unfair, to talk to them about it in the real world.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 June, 2013, 04:50:02 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 17 June, 2013, 04:15:50 PMYou know this is the internet, right?

If you can even call it that these days.  Used to be you couldn't check the weather without someone calling you a homosexual African-American Hebrew, but now it's all polite discussion like my grandad found his way here or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 June, 2013, 05:42:42 PM
Quote from: radiator on 17 June, 2013, 02:15:25 PM
QuoteIt is definitely in your power.  She's providing the stimulus. You, and only you, get to decide what the response will be.

It is spectacularly hard (still, easier than other options) - and I won't go into specifics either- but when you do manage to defuse a situation without rising to the bait, boy does it feel good.

It doesn't mean it'll be twine and roses the next time but at least you know you can do it - which also makes it worth persevering with.

But how?



Very hard to say - but you did say that you got goaded into doing something you regret. Make sure you don't do that as a response to her stimulus.

Every situation is different and every person is different. But out of all the things you listed there, I didn't see listening and understanding. (Though I'm sure you have tried)

She's not doing this for fun, she obviously wants to talk about something and get something off her chest but what?  Are you trying to solve this problem from your point of view (i.e. to get her to stop) or from hers (what exactly is she needing?)

Again, apologies if any of this is overstepping of the mark - hard to know when there are no specifics (which isn't a request for specifics, by the way).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 17 June, 2013, 06:51:41 PM
If you can hang on until 2014 real women will become redundant.

http://uk.ign.com/articles/2013/06/17/oculus-rift-erotic-adventure-game-announced




:D JOKE. I am joking! :D
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 18 June, 2013, 12:10:07 AM
Had my bike nicked from outside work today. Broad daylight, public place, just cut two steel cable locks off and rode off on the fucking thing. It was caught on camera, but the footage is so low-res it looks like Jet Set Willy has turned to crime. Fucksocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 18 June, 2013, 01:37:54 AM
Radiator, other than seeing the severe effects of an abusive relationship on a bloke I know, I don't have experience on these matters as my Mrs doesn't react in that way to PMS. I will notice usually one slightly terse comment and that's about it, even though she does suffer very bad physical pain and discomfort. (I make no apologies for the use of the word 'abusive' as whatever the underlying cause or trigger, the behaviour clearly seems to be abuse.)

You can't have the same scenario playing out indefinitely – such levels of stress run the risk of taking a toll on your (and her) physical as well as mental well-being. I would say you need to risk spoiling an outbreak of peace and discuss the issue with your girlfriend with the aim of agreeing a way to seek professional help. Perhaps you could visit her GP together which might go some way to emphasising to the GP and your GF just how much a problem this is for both of you and that it really needs to be addressed.

Apologies if I am not offering anything new.

I commend you on your attempts to keep a lid on arguments as for sure I would take the bait and rear up every single time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 June, 2013, 08:12:46 PM
Robbie bloody Williams is playing 4 nights in Manchseter so the roads, buses and trams are totally packed at rush hour.

Stupid gurning cockweasel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 18 June, 2013, 09:15:58 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 June, 2013, 08:12:46 PM
Robbie bloody Williams is playing 4 nights in Manchseter so the roads, buses and trams are totally packed at rush hour.

Stupid gurning cockweasel.

When he played at Knebworth, we were virtually prisoners in our own home. Our friends popped out for some bread and got stuck in traffic for 4 hours!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 18 June, 2013, 09:57:14 PM
Am I the only one who finds Professor James T Bear's avatar strangely and very weirdly, somehow hypnotic ????........ :o

Check the top of this page if you don't believe me......I'm sure I 'lost' about 10 minutes watching it !!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 18 June, 2013, 11:11:33 PM
I sympathise with you radiator. I see a certain someone threw their 2 penneth worth in.
Well I'm off again for another week, nothing changes.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 19 June, 2013, 07:56:34 AM
Quote from: Sideshow Bob on 18 June, 2013, 09:57:14 PM
Am I the only one who finds Professor James T Bear's avatar strangely and very weirdly, somehow hypnotic ????........ :o

Check the top of this page if you don't believe me......I'm sure I 'lost' about 10 minutes watching it !!

It disgusts me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 June, 2013, 08:03:09 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 18 June, 2013, 11:11:33 PM
I sympathise with you radiator. I see a certain someone threw their 2 penneth worth in.
Well I'm off again for another week, nothing changes.

There's an ignore function on this forum, you know, which would address that issue without you having to flounce off the board like a drama queen.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 19 June, 2013, 08:25:37 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 18 June, 2013, 11:11:33 PM
I sympathise with you radiator. I see a certain someone threw their 2 penneth worth in.
Well I'm off again for another week, nothing changes.




V
Tad drastic. As Jim pointed out, there is an ignore function if there are individuals that annoy you. Though I would rather not use it, it seems to do Mr. Campbell's rage wonders.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 19 June, 2013, 08:31:53 AM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 19 June, 2013, 08:03:09 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 18 June, 2013, 11:11:33 PM
I sympathise with you radiator. I see a certain someone threw their 2 penneth worth in. Well I'm off again for another week, nothing changes.

There's an ignore function on this forum, you know, which would address that issue without you having to flounce off the board like a drama queen.

.. and without naming the evil bastard whose presence drives him away from The Friendliest Place On The Internet ™. I missed whatever incident set brother against brother, but I bet it happened on a Doctor Who thread - those places are vicious.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 19 June, 2013, 04:32:27 PM
Ive been that busy at work today, i didnt get chance to skive off and buy the prog.
And it featuring the return of Mr Wagner and all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 19 June, 2013, 05:59:45 PM
I am currently stuck at finchley road cos some nob was seen on the tracks.there are thousands of people stuck here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 19 June, 2013, 06:06:27 PM
I passed my driving test today (first attempt, losers) so people will probably now expect me to buy some sort of motorised vehicle which I don't really want.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 June, 2013, 06:12:51 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 19 June, 2013, 06:06:27 PM
I passed my driving test today (first attempt, losers) so people will probably now expect me to buy some sort of motorised vehicle which I don't really want.

Congrats, Batson!


;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 19 June, 2013, 06:15:54 PM
Congrats to the Cosh obviously his passing his test has galvanised the met line in that it is at least moving now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 June, 2013, 06:50:06 PM
I'm not sure where else to link this, but what the actual fuck is this:

http://www.newstatesman.com/lifestyle/2013/06/kickstarting-manual-sexual-assault

QuotePull out your cock and put her hand on it. Remember, she is letting you do this because you have established yourself as a LEADER. Don't ask for permission, GRAB HER HAND, and put it right on your dick.

That, right there, is what is wrong with the world.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 19 June, 2013, 07:20:01 PM
QuoteYes Jayzus....Keep going.....

Thanks, lad, I will indeed
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 19 June, 2013, 07:22:33 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 19 June, 2013, 07:20:01 PM
QuoteYes Jayzus....Keep going.....



Thanks, lad, will indeed.

By the way, TB, Jesus fucking Christ.  Confidence works wonders with girls, aggressive sexual assault does not. (Or so I would imagine.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 19 June, 2013, 11:53:31 PM
I've just read what was in the Link above..... :o

And I'm sorry...No F*** That,  I'm not sorry in the slightest....It's complete and utter shit and a 'Rapists' charter if I ever saw one........Absolutely totally offensive and derogatory to both 'normal' men and women.....I sincerely hope it is a 'joke'....and if it is it's a pretty poor one.....
Seriously....WTF ??!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 20 June, 2013, 12:31:06 AM
Dunno about a rapists charter, but it sells both men and women short in suggesting some kind of manipulation is necessary in order to experience intimacy.  The best kind of connections between people happen all on their own.

Quote from: JamesC on 19 June, 2013, 07:56:34 AM
Quote from: Sideshow Bob on 18 June, 2013, 09:57:14 PM
I'm sure I 'lost' about 10 minutes watching it !!

It disgusts me.

You're not the only one in the world to ever be sickened by his own desires, JC.
Also I am pretty sure it is a man.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzC4hFK5P3g
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 20 June, 2013, 01:28:56 AM
AAaaaaaaHHHHHH !!!!

Just watched the link above...

PonPonPon........FFS ....now I won't be able to get that f****** thing out of my head !!!
Where on earth do you guys 'find' these things !!!.......No, don't tell me !!!.... :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 20 June, 2013, 01:34:47 AM
Oh, so that's where I've seen it before.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 20 June, 2013, 02:14:50 AM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 20 June, 2013, 12:31:06 AM
Dunno about a rapists charter, but it sells both men and women short in suggesting some kind of manipulation is necessary in order to experience intimacy.  The best kind of connections between people happen all on their own.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzC4hFK5P3g

Yes,  Professor James T Bear.....I understand that the best kind of connections between people happen on their own.......and hopefully that is what everyone else thinks as well.......BUT....
That is not what this  ( for lack of a better description ) piece of Shit article is saying.....
It's actually ( in my opinion ) advocating 'forcible' intimacy.........and that should be an absolute NO in everyones' book......or am I 'out of touch' ...???.....Please tell me I'm not wrong in thinking this !!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 20 June, 2013, 08:47:38 AM
In the absence of any actual investigation by the police, I've managed to partially locate my stolen bike. It's in Bootle. Someone brought it into a bike shop and had the chain defect that's been bugging me for the last couple of weeks fixed. Sadly, he didn't need to leave the bike in, as it was only a minor tweak.

So I now have a general location and a description of the guy. Having spoken to the police, they've confirmed this info with the guy from the shop and are still unable to do anything. It's on file as "undetected", apparently, and likely to remain so.

This is how generally well-adjusted, law-abiding people get themselves into trouble, y'know...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 June, 2013, 09:02:54 AM
Quote from: Sideshow Bob on 20 June, 2013, 02:14:50 AMPlease tell me I'm not wrong in thinking this !!!

Not at all.  But I think that's what the Prof is saying too.

Anyhow, here's a petition to ask Kickstarter to pull the funding campaign for this book: http://www.dosomething.org/petition/kickstarter  Which immediately makes me feel like I'm embracing censorship of something I haven't actually read, bar disgusting extracts, but in this instance I'm not sure I care. 

The whole thing is so symptomatic of humanity's worst aspects, well beyond the sexual arena:  Assert yourself as IN CHARGE.  Others should serve YOUR DESIRES because YOU ARE A LEADER.  Systematically manipulate everyone's weaknesses to get what you want.  The only reason to stop doing something you want to do is when someone is strong enough to stop you. 

If that's not a summary of the doom of the world, I don't know what is.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 June, 2013, 09:06:16 AM
Maybe he's just a kindly stranger who only took your bike to get the chain fixed, and he'll return it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 June, 2013, 09:09:41 AM
Seriously though, through my own recent experience, even CCTV seems to be useless in situations like this and the police have little interest. It's incredibly frustrating. Seems people can get away with pretty much any minor offence so long as they don't do it in clear sight of a policeman.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 20 June, 2013, 09:37:34 AM
So it would appear.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 June, 2013, 09:48:19 AM
Quote from: Noisybast on 20 June, 2013, 09:37:34 AM
So it would appear.

CCTV generally seems worse than useless, doubly so when coupled with police attitudes.  My wife's workplace is a sprawling mess of buildings in an isolated location, and is frequently burgled.  In every instance the perps were recorded on multiple, presumably expensive, cameras, and apparently nothing could be done.  The footage was good enough that in several instances the guys could actually be recognised on earlier recordings casing the place during the day.  Still no use to the police.  Does make you wonder what the point is, other than spying on staff and providing material for YouTube, I mean.

Hope there's some way of progressing your search, Noisy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 June, 2013, 10:06:34 AM
I mentioned on this thread a few months back about some loon tearing my girlfriends wing mirror off her car (while she was inside the car) in a road rage type incident, in broad daylight, on a busy London street, and she had taken his reg number - in that case the police weren't even prepared to check cctv footage, and kept fobbing her off with excuses like 'they wipe the tapes after 24 hours'. Her only course of action was to try and get his insurance to pay for it, but it would just be her word against his, so was pointless.

It really does make you wonder what the point of CCTV is, if not for things like that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 20 June, 2013, 10:20:36 AM
At the building I work in Norwich we've had the CCTV used in court a number of times - there are loads of forms to filled out and the thing about the tapes being wiped every 24 hours is rubbish. When we used tapes we kept them for a month, now we use a digital system that also keeps the footage for a month on a giant DVR thing. When the police want some footage to use in court they have to request it formally and it gets burned onto a disc which has to be put in a sealed envelope and opened by a credited party to make sure there's no tampering.
It's worth saying though, that this only happens in relation to quite serious crimes when they want to prove where someone was and when (it's very rare any crimes have actually happened on site).

We don't get requests in relation to stolen bikes. In fact we've actually had excellent footage of bikes being nicked from the bike racks on site but the police are not interested. All we can do is ban the perps from site and keep our eyes on them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 June, 2013, 06:13:59 PM
Considering refusing to work right now due to lack of air conditioning in our office. This is beyond ridiculous! Literally soaked in sweat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 21 June, 2013, 06:27:25 PM
http://www.tuc.org.uk/workplace/tuc-12183-f0.cfm
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 21 June, 2013, 07:02:03 PM
Ive got bloody Shingles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 21 June, 2013, 07:32:11 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 21 June, 2013, 07:02:03 PM
Ive got bloody Shingles.

That's shit Iain.
Mate of mine swears by coconut oil for the rash.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 June, 2013, 08:17:41 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 21 June, 2013, 07:02:03 PM
Ive got bloody Shingles.

Urrrrgh. Horrible stuff, my sympathies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 21 June, 2013, 09:16:44 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 21 June, 2013, 07:02:03 PM
Ive got bloody Shingles.

Really sorry to hear that, fella. Wishing you a speedy recovery...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 June, 2013, 09:22:51 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 21 June, 2013, 07:02:03 PM
Ive got bloody Shingles.
Blimey. Nasty stuff sir, hoping for a swift recovery from all at Hawkins Downs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 June, 2013, 09:23:41 PM
Ooh, nasty - hope you get well soon.

I had shingles when I was 4 or 5 years old. I still don't fully understand how that was possible, but I know I have some small scars on the side of my stomach from it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 21 June, 2013, 09:36:47 PM
Quote from: radiator on 21 June, 2013, 09:23:41 PM
I had shingles when I was 4 or 5 years old. I still don't fully understand how that was possible, but I know I have some small scars on the side of my stomach from it.



You need to previously have contracted chicken pox to manifest shingles as it's a re-activation of the hibernated virus in later life. Chicken pox can cause scarring too. Never heard of any kids with shingles as it usually appears due to lower immunity caused by stress.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 June, 2013, 09:42:56 PM
My memory of it is very vague, but I dimly remember having like weird rings of sores around my torso and being off school for a few days. AFAIK, despite common knowledge you can contract it as a kid but it's more severe if you get it as an adult.

Could have been a misdiagnosis I suppose, but I do remember it being quite a big deal and being the focus of a lot of attention.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 21 June, 2013, 10:15:12 PM
As far as I was aware,  it's as Mr Soap says,  a re-activation of the hibernating Chicken Pox virus that produces Shingles in adults.......Several friends have had it and it's absolutely horrendous.......so sympathies with you Iain......

Chicken pox in children can produce scarring if the spots ( like watery blisters ) are squeezed or scratched open....When I was a kid and caught it,  the practice at the time was to make you wear mittens ( on Doctors instructions ) when sleeping,  so you didn't 'pick' the spots.....I'm talking very early 60s.....
Medical knowledge has moved on since, ( thankfully ) but common practices then included ......
Calamine lotion for sunburn, Shearing your hair if there was an outbreak of nits in your school....( whether you caught them or not ) and Kaolin poultices for infected cuts,  to 'draw' the poison out.... :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 21 June, 2013, 10:16:01 PM
Quote from: radiator on 21 June, 2013, 09:42:56 PM
My memory of it is very vague, but I dimly remember having like weird rings of sores around my torso and being off school for a few days.


Never had it myself but that sounds like Shingles more than Chicken Pox all right.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 June, 2013, 10:48:00 PM
Kids can indeed get shingles (my brother did, admittedly mildly), even very young ones, as long as they've had even a mild dose of chicken pox previously.  My mother had the most horrible case of shingles many years ago, hence my real sympathy for Judge Jack.

Maybe our health services should get the finger out and vaccinate against chicken pox in the first place: I was a bit annoyed to watch my eldest really suffer with it while his Australian cousins will never have to have it.  Treating it as some sort of rite of passage ignores the potential problems down the road, not to mention the economic cost of having each kid (and thus one parent) out of school and/or childcare for at least a full week.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 22 June, 2013, 09:39:21 AM
Firstly id like to say thanks Guys - appreciate the concern, and well wishes.
At present ive got it relatively mild - though i do have a particulary nasty crop of blisters on the back of my neck.

Now if you'd have asked me about Shingles this time yesterday, i wouldnt really have been able to enlighten you to any real degree, so its been a voyage of discovery - in more ways than one.

It first started to flare up Wednesday, though looking back i think it tried to start last week. Thought the redness, and tenderness was a touch of too much Sun, so treated it to some aftersun lotion....
Thursday, when the blisters started, the Chemist said it looks like a Wasp/Bee sting, and sold me Insect bite cream to rub on it...

Went to my own Pharmacist Friday morning - and the look of horror on the face of the young lass on the counter when i showed her my 'insect bite' led me to ask "is it that bad  :lol:, who then recommended me seeing my own GP, and i managed to get seen pretty much there and then.
And yes, its all a throw back to when i had Chicken Pox aged 13.

So on a course of antiviral tablets at present, and hopefully that'll sort it out.

I did break my golden rule, and use Google images regarding this. (never a good idea, if you have an ailment,  :lol:), so i can say that compared to some, im lucky at present.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 23 June, 2013, 09:17:04 PM
Just like to clear a something up.
I did not leave the board for a short sabbatical because of a few comments or peoples views. It's just the fact that I am rather bored with the internet at the moment and previously have spent far too long on it. Probably mid life crisis or something like that.
I think the problem with the written word is that conclusions are jumped on too quick and things are read into sentences that are not there.
I will be in and out from time to time but not very often.




V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 24 June, 2013, 12:54:06 AM
My TV is picking up sound but no picture; the most I can get is the info box telling me what channel I'm on or the digital channel listings screen. I've tried a new cable for the aerial and switching all kinds of cables in the digibox around but really can't be bothered trying the portable TV. I'm now trying to figure out how bad this is. I mean, Dr Who? Not on again until November. Sons of Anarchy? Doubt it'll be on before 2014. The Returned? Only caught the opening two episodes so it's not a major loss. Everybody Loves Raymond? Seen them all.
May try living to the words of wisdom from Grandpa in Lost Boys, e.g. if you have a TV guide, you don't need a TV.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 24 June, 2013, 01:14:29 AM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 24 June, 2013, 12:54:06 AM
My TV is picking up sound but no picture; the most I can get is the info box telling me what channel I'm on or the digital channel listings screen. I've tried a new cable for the aerial and switching all kinds of cables in the digibox around but really can't be bothered trying the portable TV. I'm now trying to figure out how bad this is. I mean, Dr Who? Not on again until November. Sons of Anarchy? Doubt it'll be on before 2014. The Returned? Only caught the opening two episodes so it's not a major loss. Everybody Loves Raymond? Seen them all.
May try living to the words of wisdom from Grandpa in Lost Boys, e.g. if you have a TV guide, you don't need a TV.
D'oh! Walking Dead returns Saturday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 25 June, 2013, 03:31:19 AM
It may have been pissing down with rain in Scotland but here in Canada it's been 30 degrees and torture. The humidity makes it feel much hotter, around 38 to 40. Bizarrely, I'm wishing for some rain!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 June, 2013, 09:05:32 AM
Quote from: Trout on 25 June, 2013, 03:31:19 AM
It may have been pissing down with rain in Scotland but here in Canada it's been 30 degrees and torture. The humidity makes it feel much hotter, around 38 to 40. Bizarrely, I'm wishing for some rain!

I have heard that some countries have a season between Spring and Autumn, but it's interesting to read a first-hand account. 

How are the kids coping with the heat, Mike?  Is it just those of us of a certain age cohort that consider anything over 19 C to be an unreasonable imposition?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 25 June, 2013, 12:19:36 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 25 June, 2013, 09:05:32 AM

I have heard that some countries have a season between Spring and Autumn, but it's interesting to read a first-hand account. 

We do have seasons!  Cold, then cold and wet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 25 June, 2013, 12:22:22 PM
Quote from: Trout on 25 June, 2013, 03:31:19 AM
It may have been pissing down with rain in Scotland but here in Canada it's been 30 degrees and torture. The humidity makes it feel much hotter, around 38 to 40. Bizarrely, I'm wishing for some rain!
No. It was pretty nice here yesterday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 25 June, 2013, 05:21:09 PM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 24 June, 2013, 12:54:06 AM
My TV is picking up sound but no picture; the most I can get is the info box telling me what channel I'm on or the digital channel listings screen. I've tried a new cable for the aerial and switching all kinds of cables in the digibox around but really can't be bothered trying the portable TV.

It's a minor impediment that vzzbux - the guy whose post directly precedes your own - says he won't be checking back in for a while. I'm pretty sure he installs digital telly for a living (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cosmic_irony#Cosmic_irony_.28Irony_of_fate.29).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 25 June, 2013, 05:35:51 PM


Quote from: vzzbux on 23 June, 2013, 09:17:04 PM
I will be in and out from time to time but not very often.


That applies to a lot in life.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 25 June, 2013, 05:43:26 PM
Huge mouth ulcers all over my tongue, and the inside of my lips and cheeks, for the better part of the last fortnight, but in the last day or so have just gone for broke.  Ow.  No really, ow.
My wisdom teeth coming through didn't hurt this much, and salt and vinegar on my chips was easily the second-worst idea I've had in ages - the first being having chips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 26 June, 2013, 12:21:40 AM
Arrived home this evening and as I'm parking the Landy I notice it's sounding off.. Like something is loose under the bonnet.. Jump out, open it up with the engine running, can't immediately see anything, but definitely notice a klonking noise coming from somewhere down below.. Can't be good..

Go up to the flat, google.. YouTube.. Dinner.. Bit more google.. Everything's pointing to a knackered big end bearing.. Aaaahhhh fuck.. Go back down stairs armed with a torch and start pushing and prodding bits that've bolted to the engine.. Nope. Everything's tight. I have a look underneath. Can't see anything.. Wait.. Is that.. Oil? Ffs.. Follow the oil trail up to: vacuum pump. The very same vacuum pump I told the garage was leaking. The garage assured me all was fine with it and it really didn't need replacing, but an oil breather hose needed to be swapped.. Mkay, well, there's no more leaks now, so I guess they mended it. Clearly not. I check the oil level and it's FUCKING EMPTY! The leaking vacuum pump must've clearly pissed it all out. There was apparently just enough in there to keep the pressure light from coming on, but not enough to stop something in the bowels (my money's on the big end and crank shaft bearings) from eating itself.. God only knows how long it's not had enough oil (it had a service not even 6500km/4000m ago!). Tomorrow it was going to have its timing belt replaced.. Now it's going to have a timing belt, vacuum pump as well as bearings replaced. NOT at the same garage, of course..

Fan-fucking-tasting.

Interestingly, the thing still ran beautifully, had plenty of power and wasn't smoking excessively. Land Rover deserve a lot of praise regarding the 300tdi engine..

Incidentally, when I asked them to look at the injectors I got a " nah, some are louder than others.." Changed 'em myself. They looked like they had been buried in the garden for months from all the gasses blowing past them..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 26 June, 2013, 09:07:39 AM
Update: cheaper to put in a second hand engine..  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 26 June, 2013, 09:01:22 PM
Quote from: Michaelvk on 26 June, 2013, 12:21:40 AM
Arrived home this evening and as I'm parking the Landy I notice it's sounding off.. Like something is loose under the bonnet.. snip

Fan-fucking-tasting.


I hear you man, the amount of bad luck my family and friends had with cars....did you have it for long?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2013, 07:01:42 AM
Had a bit of a nosebleed at work on Wednesday at 02:20 and I'm still in hospital now!
I'm so bored and I missed my Wednesday visit to the comic shop for the Prog. I'm hoping that when the specialists look at it today that I'll. Be closer to going home, as 24 hours with a tampon up your nose is not fun :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Pete Wells on 27 June, 2013, 07:47:13 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v76/Wellsy/burdistampon.jpg) (http://smg.photobucket.com/user/Wellsy/media/burdistampon.jpg.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2013, 08:04:23 AM
I just knew that was gonna be there when your name came up Mr Wells :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Michaelvk on 27 June, 2013, 09:28:22 AM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 26 June, 2013, 09:01:22 PM
Quote from: Michaelvk on 26 June, 2013, 12:21:40 AM
Arrived home this evening and as I'm parking the Landy I notice it's sounding off.. Like something is loose under the bonnet.. snip

Fan-fucking-tasting.


I hear you man, the amount of bad luck my family and friends had with cars....did you have it for long?

3 months or so.. Thing that annoys me most is that I had told them about The Leaky Thing and they did bugger all about it, telling me it's fine.. I had one go on me before, but as these guys were highly recommended by two colleagues, I took it in good faith they knew what they were doing.. So I'm not sure if it was proper incompetence, general indifference or they didn't feel like being told how to do their job by some English sounding long haired twat.. Either way, I'm having to put a 'new' engine in my beloved Land Rover. Don't get me started on the massive inconvenience of not having my own vehicle.. Yes, I probably should've known better and should've checked the oil level more dilligently, but when it's not pumping black smoke out the back and isn't leaking, then there's no reason for me to worry if they've assured me it's not leaking anymore..As it turns out it wasn't leaking because there was no sodding oil in it..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 June, 2013, 09:36:14 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2013, 07:01:42 AMBe closer to going home, as 24 hours with a tampon up your nose is not fun :lol:[/color]

Some folk pay good money for that sort of thing.  Hope you're already on your way home and none the worse for it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 27 June, 2013, 10:58:35 AM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 27 June, 2013, 07:01:42 AM
Had a bit of a nosebleed at work on Wednesday at 02:20 and I'm still in hospital now!
I'm so bored and I missed my Wednesday visit to the comic shop for the Prog. I'm hoping that when the specialists look at it today that I'll. Be closer to going home, as 24 hours with a tampon up your nose is not fun :lol:
Did the specialist say it wouldn't bleed so much if you kept your finger out of it?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 27 June, 2013, 07:26:45 PM
Hope you're on the mend, John.

So, here's the thing: Since my bike was nicked, I've been making some enquiries of my own. Two days after it went, I Googled "second hand bikes Liverpool" and paid a visit to the first place that came up. The guy told me he'd not had anyone try to sell a bike, but that if I gave him a description, he'd keep an eye out. I gave him the make & model, he replied "Is it a black one?" and proceeded to identify a fairly specific chain defect that had been bugging me for about a week. Turns out some little scrote had been in and had it adjusted that afternoon. He didn't have a name, but he gave a description and said he was pretty sure he's local.

A couple of times since then, I've been for a casual drive around the area. On Monday, I saw him. About 16 or 17, shaved head, black tracksuit, sitting on my bike in the street. Sadly, he was not alone and I was not prepared. I've held off on posting anything, as I wasn't sure how I was going to proceed. As it turns out, I've been brow-beaten by my girlfriend and mother into giving the details to the police and letting them handle it. I don't expect to hear from them again, but it has removed the option of going Full Burdis on the little shit.

What's upset me most is how everyone around me has insisted from the start that I should just accept having my property stolen and give up trying to track it down. "It's OK. It's only a bike". My girlfriend in particular has been very keen to stress the futility and hopelessness of the whole thing and has been a strong advocate for shutting the fuck up and letting it go. I can't - It's important not to let them get away with it. I need to do *something*.

Am I the freak here?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 27 June, 2013, 07:52:41 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 27 June, 2013, 07:26:45 PM
A couple of times since then, I've been for a casual drive around the area. On Monday, I saw him. About 16 or 17, shaved head, black tracksuit, sitting on my bike in the street. Sadly, he was not alone and I was not prepared. I've held off on posting anything, as I wasn't sure how I was going to proceed. As it turns out, I've been brow-beaten by my girlfriend and mother into giving the details to the police and letting them handle it. I don't expect to hear from them again, but it has removed the option of going Full Burdis on the little shit.

What's upset me most is how everyone around me has insisted from the start that I should just accept having my property stolen and give up trying to track it down. "It's OK. It's only a bike". My girlfriend in particular has been very keen to stress the futility and hopelessness of the whole thing and has been a strong advocate for shutting the fuck up and letting it go. I can't - It's important not to let them get away with it. I need to do *something*.

Am I the freak here?

If it that simple to prove it is your bike (like you know the frame serial number off the top of your head) I can't see why the police can't sort out a easy arrest, you've done all the detective work for them! Keep saying it to the police.  For safety's sake I wouldn't advise confronting any scumbag over it though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 27 June, 2013, 08:02:47 PM
Noisybast is, The Sweeny!
Great tale there nb, have to say though, good on you for doing the head hunting. The police should honestly have no excuse for not making an arrest with this much evidence, can the mechanic act as a pseudo-witness?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 27 June, 2013, 08:17:56 PM
He's already confirmed to the police what he saw. The officer I spoke to (before I spotted the bike myself) was still doubtful, saying even if the bike turned up, it basically came down to my word against the thief's.

The second officer I spoke to (post-sighting) was slightly more positive, citing my recent and distinctive customisations to the bike as things that might help to ID the bike. We'll see what happens.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 June, 2013, 10:41:28 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 27 June, 2013, 07:26:45 PM
Am I the freak here?

Not a bit of it: it is 'only a bike', but that doesn't mean it isn't important.  Broken window syndrome applies if nothing else.  But as Otter says, keep working on the police, don't put yourself in harm's way.  Eventually it will become more annoying for them to deal with you than to arrest a scrote.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 28 June, 2013, 01:35:37 AM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 27 June, 2013, 07:52:41 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 27 June, 2013, 07:26:45 PM
It's important not to let them get away with it. I need to do *something*.
If it that simple to prove it is your bike (like you know the frame serial number off the top of your head) I can't see why the police can't sort out a easy arrest, you've done all the detective work for them! Keep saying it to the police.  For safety's sake I wouldn't advise confronting any scumbag over it though.

Are you certain he's the actual thief?  Having worked in Bootle for years I'd admit that 99% of Scouse scallies would buy blatant stolen property.  However, there's always the chance he's the other 1% and an innocent party.

Failing that you could ambush him in a darkened alley, kneecap him and apply a generous Deep Heat enema.  He won't forget that in a hurry.  Nor will he be riding any bicycles soon thereafter.  (I've got a loaded syringe ready-prepared, just in case I ever bump into that twat Sc*j*.)
Title: Re: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 June, 2013, 09:25:16 AM
Quote from: A.Cow on 28 June, 2013, 01:35:37 AM
Are you certain he's the actual thief?

Well, there's the rub. While he's *definitely* riding my bike, I had already considered the possibility that he didn't actually take it. He could just as easily be someone whose dad bought a cheap bike from a bloke in the pub (Yes, I know - the chances of him ever having met his dad are remote at best). That's why every more... proactive version of the plan involved firmly but non-violently taking my property back from him and getting the hell out of there, avoiding any fighty unpleasantness all costs. Besides anything else, I might *look* big and scary, but I've never been one for getting punched...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 28 June, 2013, 10:02:52 AM
I lost my faith in the police years ago.

When I was a student, I was walking home from a bar one night with my girlfriend and we were followed home by a gang of chavs who then proceeded to attack us on our doorstep.

I managed to fend off the two weasels attacking me long enough for our friendly neighbor to shout at them and tell them she was calling the police, at which point they legged it.

When the police arrived, they took a statement, but treated us in an extraordinarily patronising manner. They repeatedly tried to get us to admit that we had somehow antagonised the gang - that they must have been the bar we were in, and we must have had some kind of altercation with them prior. No, we replied - they were just scumbag street urchins who were roaming the streets looking for innocent victims to prey on. The fat old rozzer seemed almost amused by this, and cheerfully informed us that in all his years on the force, he'd never known people to just attack others for no reason. I was astounded, as in the shithole of a town we lived at the time, incidents like this would happen to us or people we knew almost on a weekly basis the whole time we lived there.

Then a few days later, my girlfriend saw the girl who had attacked her in the town. She approached a nearby policewoman, who refused to do anything but write this news down in her little notebook.

Doesn't it make you feel safe?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 June, 2013, 10:54:41 AM
This. Totally.

I have never felt so let down, unsupported and flat out powerless as I have since I first reported this to the police. I stupidly thought they'd view it as an easy arrest to keep their figures up. Turns out a stolen bicycle is just not interesting enough, even when I do all the bloody donkey work for them.

I don't know why I'm surprised. Around 1998-99, I was badly beaten up at a bus stop by five chavs for wearing a leather jacket instead of a tracksuit. It was the latest in a series of increasingly violent incidents involving the same gang, who had seemingly targeted me because I was local, different and frequently out alone. I was concussed and needed stitches. When the police eventually arrived, several hours later, they took a statement with an air of disinterest and griped to my parents that they'd been called away from a traffic accident for this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 28 June, 2013, 11:58:44 AM
Having worked in a public city centre building for the last 12 years I have thousands of stories of Police disinterest / incompetence.
It almost makes me want to become a petty criminal because the chances of actually getting caught for anything seem minimal.
From my experience things like bike thefts tend to be put down to the actions of a small group of regularly nicked scrotes who get asked if there are any other offences they'd like taken into consideration when they're in court. They actually get a lesser sentence for 'owning up' and the police get to close their cases nice and neatly without having to do any extra work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 28 June, 2013, 12:45:31 PM
They've watched too many police dramas and expect their lives to be like that. They can't even feign interest in real police work any more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 28 June, 2013, 01:05:48 PM
Quote from: radiator on 28 June, 2013, 10:02:52 AMWhen the police arrived, they took a statement, but treated us in an extraordinarily patronising manner. They repeatedly tried to get us to admit that we had somehow antagonised the gang - that they must have been the bar we were in, and we must have had some kind of altercation with them prior.

Ah, victim-blaming Due Diligence is merely a part of police procedure.
A mate of mine was hospitalised several years ago when he was jumped after leaving a bar, and only for the fact that this happened immediately outside the building and he was spotted laying on the ground, he'd have died, as he spent several days having his breathing done by machines.  Like me, my mate is Catholic and got a hiding from another Catholic after leaving a Protestant bar (we both live in a very Nationalist town) some time in the early hours after a lock-in.  He'd never met the guy, never even heard of him, so he thought nothing of the police questions about knowing him or having met him before - at the guy's trial, it was said he had a long-standing beef with my mate, and the fact the police had asked questions about this was trotted out as part of his mostly-successful defence.  The fact that this happened hours after the bar closed and the guy was a hardcore Nationalist in a Protestant area in the wee hours of the morning didn't seem to factor much into things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 June, 2013, 05:40:34 PM
An office I used to work in was burgled one night. we'd had a few petty thefts, but this time the place was ransacked with computers etc nicked. The police investigated and found the fingerprints of our night-time security guard (and his smackhead brother) inside cupboards that they should have had no access to.

His defence was that the prints were there from the earlier petty thefts, but he hadn't done the burglary, although he'd been on duty that night and had seen nobody else. He was not charged with any offence.

My own prints were taken for elimination and we were told we could attend the station after being eliminated in order to witness them being destroyed. Despite repeated requests, this never happened.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 02 July, 2013, 04:51:12 PM
I hate it when you're watching Countdown and the numbers round is so easy it's almost insulting
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 05 July, 2013, 03:06:25 PM
I've waited in all day for B & Q to deliver a new toilet that now when I open the box looks like it was dropped from a FUCKING helicopter!!! Aaaargh!!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 05 July, 2013, 07:16:17 PM
I left it too late to catch Fast and Furious 6 at the cinema.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 05 July, 2013, 10:01:03 PM
Don't know where to put this so here it lies.
Just found out I am going to be a gramps.
She is 17 in a few weeks. Stupid girl.
At least me and the ex had a good laugh about it earlier.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 05 July, 2013, 10:13:39 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 05 July, 2013, 10:01:03 PM
Don't know where to put this so here it lies.
Just found out I am going to be a gramps.
She is 17 in a few weeks. Stupid girl.
At least me and the ex had a good laugh about it earlier.

Congratulations?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 05 July, 2013, 11:14:00 PM
She has been a complete bitch over the past year and it has been nearly that since I last saw her. Maybe this is the kick up the arse she needs. Only time will tell.





V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 06 July, 2013, 12:20:20 AM
Its a tough one vzzbux, it often can be the making of someone, with family support. Congrats too, I hope it will bring much happiness for yourselves in the years to come.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 06 July, 2013, 06:47:21 PM
Not for me but for this comics guy from Sheffield......

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-23203033 :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 06 July, 2013, 08:02:07 PM
Quote
"To be honest I'm shocked but money has not got such a value to me. I think it is funny.

"I really love the idea of me creating something out of such expensive things that's worth less. I think it's brilliant."

Yeah - right. I bet his Missus gave him a kicking when he got home :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 06 July, 2013, 08:52:57 PM

Is there really any human being alive who doesn't know that old comics are worth silly money?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 06 July, 2013, 09:23:53 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 05 July, 2013, 10:01:03 PM
Don't know where to put this so here it lies.
Just found out I am going to be a gramps.
She is 17 in a few weeks. Stupid girl.
At least me and the ex had a good laugh about it earlier.



V

I literally don't know what to say to that... Hope everything ends up well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 06 July, 2013, 11:54:54 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 06 July, 2013, 09:23:53 PM
Quote from: vzzbux on 05 July, 2013, 10:01:03 PM
Don't know where to put this so here it lies.
Just found out I am going to be a gramps.
She is 17 in a few weeks. Stupid girl.
At least me and the ex had a good laugh about it earlier.

I literally don't know what to say to that... Hope everything ends up well.
That makes two of us. It is very complicated at the moment.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 11:04:38 AM
Away on holiday at the moment, so have been a bit out of the loop. Checked my Twitter this morning to find I had a direct message from a certain famous movie type dated two days ago.

Putting two and two together, I think I know what it related to, but think I may have missed the boat now!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 07 July, 2013, 12:25:02 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 11:04:38 AM
Away on holiday at the moment, so have been a bit out of the loop. Checked my Twitter this morning to find I had a direct message from a certain famous movie type dated two days ago. Putting two and two together, I think I know what it related to, but think I may have missed the boat now!

Now we'll never know how much the fucking thing's sold on DVD.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 07 July, 2013, 01:34:24 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 11:04:38 AM
I had a direct message from a certain famous movie type dated two days ago.

Recognition for a slice of fried gold?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 01:41:04 PM
Ironing is just bullshit isn't it? Just spent twenty minutes plus ironing a damn shirt, highest setting, loads of steam - result = shirt still covered in tiny creases.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 07 July, 2013, 03:17:44 PM
You'll be wanting a can of spray starch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 July, 2013, 03:35:52 PM
I don't iron anything. Occasionally the front of a shirt, but I usually just put it on as is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 07 July, 2013, 03:55:17 PM

T-shirt, jeans ... nope, can't see why anything I own needs ironing.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 07 July, 2013, 03:58:19 PM


Here tip on how to fold shirt in 2 seconds.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uz6rjbw0ZA0 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uz6rjbw0ZA0)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 03:58:23 PM
Same here - I think ironing in general is a colossal waste of time, but you have to iron a shirt, esp at a wedding!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 July, 2013, 04:04:25 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 03:58:23 PM
Same here - I think ironing in general is a colossal waste of time, but you have to iron a shirt, esp at a wedding!

Aye... fair dos on that one!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 07 July, 2013, 07:21:20 PM
I confess, I went to a wedding the other day and I didn't iron it.

In my defence I did wear a jacket over it, as well as a tie, so I doubt anyone noticed.

Also I have to dress smart* for my job, but I rarely iron stuff.... Then again I tend to wear a jumper or jacket over the shirt so that covers most of the creases. Mind you there are often creases on the jumper too... but due to the colour it's probably not all that noticeable.

I'm not sure how I'm going to get away with that in the hot weather. It's okay at the moment as we don't get many into college over this period (summer holidays) but soon...

That being said I will iron stuff on occasion. I sort of go through phases. But when I do I tend to leave it to a minimum.

*Or at least semi-smart. I often forgo the tie.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DrJomster on 07 July, 2013, 11:21:58 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 07 July, 2013, 01:34:24 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 11:04:38 AM
I had a direct message from a certain famous movie type dated two days ago.

Recognition for a slice of fried gold?

Caught the first half of Shaun of the Dead for the very first time yesterday. Not bad at all actually... And they mentioned fried gold quite a bit!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 July, 2013, 01:26:37 AM
Sister of a friend of mine does ironing for dosh.  She charges 1 euro per item, and in addition to the expected shirts etc. actual clients give her their boxer shorts, t-shirts and (I kid you not) their socks.  Not sure if a pair counts as one item, but either way the phrase 'more money than sense' springs to mind.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 09 July, 2013, 07:56:21 AM
Shirts I can understand, although I tend to side with Mardroid on this issue. T-Shirts iron themselves on hangers. Boxers shorts and socks are wrong on every level. I did know someone who used to iron their towels... I don't know them anymore...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 July, 2013, 06:35:28 PM
I asked a good friend to help me out with my mural painting jobs last Christmas - he's been doing it ever since and a great job he's been doing of it too.  Today, he dropped the bombshell that he'd like to start his own mural painting business; or go into partnership with me - I can't stop him doing the former, though having a direct rival in the same city will inevitably put strain on our friendship; and I don't particularly want the latter, as it's been my business for the last 10 years (albeit never full-time till this year).
Bit of a kick in the bollix, that. I'm not a great business and also not the most assertive chap in the world; and I really don't know what to do.
Business and friendship don't mix, I suppose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 09 July, 2013, 06:52:31 PM

Doesn't sound like you've got much choice, Jayzus, so you might as well embrace the opportunity to be able to take holidays in the knowledge that someone capable will still be taking care of the business. Just don't go on any skiing holidays or introduce your protégée to your friend's husband (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHVYTPFgCqE).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 09 July, 2013, 07:21:39 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 09 July, 2013, 06:35:28 PM
Business and friendship don't mix, I suppose.

I know what you mean, but im also aware that this can work.
Your call J, if your not keen, then your not keen, but it could be a lot of fun - and more importantly, it could really work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 09 July, 2013, 07:47:04 PM

Business types are fond of quoting Michael Corleone's injunction to keep your friends close and your enemies (potential competitors) closer. Al Pacino's dialogue was paraphrasing Sun Tzu's advice (http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Sun_Tzu#The_Art_of_War), and the fact the corporate world is so fond of martial metaphors might go some way to explaining why suits generally act like dicks. TordelBack can probably give you the benefit of his hard won personal experience regarding how to arrange your affairs in case the worst happens, but I'd follow that other well known Oriental advice beloved of corporate wank-speakers and treat this crisis as an opportunity (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a41eQIO07R4).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 09 July, 2013, 08:42:04 PM
Yep.....Got to agree with all of the above....
Look upon it as an opportunity to increase your output/ expand your business .....Better a partner than a competitor.....

However, as you say it's your business, and if you're going to take him on as a partner.....Get it done via a legal 'contract'........With ownership rights etc / splitting of costs / distribution of profits / re-investment into the business etc....If it's 'legally binding' than at least if it all goes 'tits up' between the two of you, you'll have a 'legal' fall back......Don't know how much this would cost, probably several hundred....but that would be a 'shared' business cost....and if he's sensible at all, this is what he should want...
Good Luck...
Cheers..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 09 July, 2013, 08:57:21 PM
Have you considered murdering him?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 09 July, 2013, 09:17:00 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 09 July, 2013, 08:57:21 PM
Have you considered murdering him?

^
Perhaps this is an alternative ??????
Nice to see that the Moderator gets right to the 'heart' of the problem....And offers a 'very logical and common sense solution'... :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 July, 2013, 09:24:04 PM
Thanks for the advice, everyone.  Maybe a partnership could be worth considering.  Or murder. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 09 July, 2013, 11:01:54 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 09 July, 2013, 08:57:21 PM
Have you considered murdering him?
Ever the bottomless pit of useful advice. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 09 July, 2013, 11:15:21 PM
^
This.........
Nice one Hawkmonger....... :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 09 July, 2013, 11:37:29 PM
Didn't know there was that much demand for murals.

I've got an idea for a mural painting business that I may take to Dragon's Den...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 10 July, 2013, 06:44:43 AM
I'll kill you and eat you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 10 July, 2013, 07:35:39 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 10 July, 2013, 06:44:43 AM
I'll kill you and eat you.

My work here is done.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 10 July, 2013, 08:13:20 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 10 July, 2013, 06:44:43 AM
Quote from: Buttonman on 09 July, 2013, 11:37:29 PM
Didn't know there was that much demand for murals. I've got an idea for a mural painting business that I may take to Dragon's Den...

I'll kill you and eat you.

Idi Amin tried killing and eating his rivals as far back as the seventies; Uganda never returned a profit while he was CEO, and there's an absolute nightmare entanglement of red tape and legal difficulties around cannibalism which deters investors. For that reason, I'm out.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 10 July, 2013, 10:05:47 AM
If you've got more work on than you can handle then having a partner may work.  But, if you're struggling to find enough work for one person, taking on a partner just wouldn't make any sense.  Simples really!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 10 July, 2013, 04:07:27 PM
Thanks, Tankie!  Having thought it through, your advice makes a lot of sense.  At the moment I have just about enough work to keep myself busy; occasionally asking other people for help when it gets too overwhelming.  However, this is only on occasion.
So, to be totally honest I don't really need a partner - not for a while yet anyway.  Choice made!  Cheers again
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 10 July, 2013, 04:51:37 PM
No problem, Mate, hope it all works out well for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 10 July, 2013, 06:59:04 PM
Thanks, Tankie, you're a gent!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 11 July, 2013, 05:41:58 PM
This happened to me several months ago while trying to acquire some ( more ) Artwork for my Collection from eBay.......and it has 'kinda' pissed me off ever since, so thought I would 'vent' here.....

I had spotted a wonderful Wolverine Massacre piece over on Comic Art Fans by artist Rafael Albuquerque ( American Vampire ), however the price was 1000 US$ ( OBO ) and there was no way I could afford that....
Then during one of my trawls through eBay I spotted it For Sale......I bid like crazy, actually going up to 400 US$ then had to stop, as I'd reached my limit !!....Actually it was about 100 US$ 'over' my planned limit, ( I got excited ! ) but that was me out..!!
So it finally sold for 405 US$........F**k !!!

Then 2 days later I got a message from eBay saying that the 'high bidder' had pulled out and it was mine for 400US$ + postage......
I got quite excited and went on to my eBay page and had another look at it....While there I checked on the 'automatic bids' and the same bidder had raised the bids from about 150 US$ all the way up to 405US$...On some more checking of the bids,  it showed that I had out-bid everyone else, around the 250 US$, when I had 'stuck in' my supposedly final bid of 300 US$......

Anyway, thought this was a bit suspect so offered him the 300 US$ that would have been the winning bid, if the winning bidder who had driven the price all the way up, had not pulled out.....

Got an eMail back....Sorry want 400 US$ + postage for it......
I still really like the piece but I felt a bit 'manipulated'......As if the seller had got someone to keep raising the 'ante', and then get him to pull out.........Anything like this happen to you guys ????

Link to the piece here....http://www.comicartfans.com/GalleryPiece.asp?Piece=993217&GSub=86056 (http://www.comicartfans.com/GalleryPiece.asp?Piece=993217&GSub=86056)


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 11 July, 2013, 05:49:49 PM
That sort of stuff happens more often than you would like to think. It was probably the seller or his mate bumping the price up.
I have been caught a few times in the past by people doing this which is why i now simply wait to the end of the auction and stick in my max bid....either i win or i don't, so far it's a tactic that has worked well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 11 July, 2013, 05:54:16 PM
Quote from: Emp on 11 July, 2013, 05:49:49 PM
That sort of stuff happens more often than you would like to think. It was probably the seller or his mate bumping the price up.
I have been caught a few times in the past by people doing this which is why i now simply wait to the end of the auction and stick in my max bid....either i win or i don't, so far it's a tactic that has worked well.

Cheers Emp, that is what I usually do....BUT,  it was a piece I really wanted, and I let my enthusiasm 'run away with my common sense'...

A Question though.......If I had waited until the very last minute and put my bid of 300 US$ 'in' and the seller didn't have time to put a 'counter bid / higher offer' in...Is he legally obligated to sell it to me. ??
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 11 July, 2013, 06:01:39 PM
Thats shitty, Bob and its fairly obvious whats going on there, isnt it.
Most of the time E-bay is fine, but when this happens it sticks out like a sore thumb, and like i say, totally obvious.

Luckily, ive only had one idiot try it on. And thanks to E-bay, it must be said, he lost.

Its a nice piece of art, but.......


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 11 July, 2013, 06:08:42 PM
Quote from: Judge Jack on 11 July, 2013, 06:01:39 PM
Its a nice piece of art, but.......

Thanks for the kind words Judge Jack........
Ahhhh !!!.......What were you going to say ??......Too much ???..............At 300 US$ I thought it was OK, but at 400US$ ...Nope !!.....But I did get caught up in the excitement......

What did you think of the piece...??...Won't be offended, just would like another collectors' views on artwork and price......I'll stick at 300 US$ ( which is about £ 250 including postage )....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 11 July, 2013, 06:20:10 PM
Heh! Kinda left it hanging there, didnt i.
What i meant to imply was - Its a nice piece of art, BUT would you still want it after someone's tried it on?
Had it soured things, in other words.
Artwise, its a striking piece - and one i quite like actually. What you would price it at, im not sure. If its being offered to you at $400, which is roughtly £260ish, then that doesnt sound bad.

You sound quite keen on snagging it, so if you want it.....

EDIT; A compromise at $350 sounds better. Would he go for that?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 11 July, 2013, 06:35:10 PM
No, he made it clear,  that he really didn't even want to sell at the 400 US$....

And while I still like the piece the whole thing has kinda 'soured' it for me......
But more importantly,  I've spent the cash on my Bob Molesworth' Mongrol commission piece,  and another £15 on the Henry Flint Mongrol sketch.....( And they need framed ).....And am saving up for Kendal Comic Con,  and Leeds Thoughtbubble,  and Sean Phillips new 'coffee table' book of his artwork.....
Which is due out just before Kendal Comic Con....so hope to have that and get it signed there...

Just don't have enough cash to get everything I want, so have to remember advice from this very forum....Stay focused !!....It's really easy to get pulled in loads of different directions...
Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 11 July, 2013, 06:54:01 PM
Quote from: Sideshow Bob on 11 July, 2013, 06:35:10 PM
And while I still like the piece the whole thing has kinda 'soured' it for me......

Aye, sod him. It would have left a nasty taste with me as well.
Better off givin' ya money to more worthwhile ventures.
Hopefully ill be popping to the Kendal Festival, as well. Still at the early planning stage for that one, but it looks grand, doesnt it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 11 July, 2013, 10:27:53 PM

A Question though.......If I had waited until the very last minute and put my bid of 300 US$ 'in' and the seller didn't have time to put a 'counter bid / higher offer' in...Is he legally obligated to sell it to me. ??
[/quote]

I'd like to think so, it being an auction an all....last bid is the winner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 11 July, 2013, 10:56:38 PM
I wasn't sure about the 'legality' of him having to sell to me at that price, if he didn't want to...
Could eBay 'force' him to sell at the agreed / highest bid price, or can he just withdraw it......There was no reserve price on it....

Doesn't matter now though, but was 'kinda' peeved at the time....But just wondering where I would have stood...
Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 11 July, 2013, 11:03:45 PM
That's what a reserve is for.....no reserve then you can't really bitch about what it goes for. Well that's my understanding.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 July, 2013, 04:54:02 PM
I forgot to check this week's shifts on Friday, whcih means that I'll have to go in for 8 tomorrow - and just hpe I'm not down for an 11.30 start
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 14 July, 2013, 07:23:44 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 14 July, 2013, 04:54:02 PM
I forgot to check this week's shifts on Friday, whcih means that I'll have to go in for 8 tomorrow - and just hpe I'm not down for an 11.30 start

I had just done 4  x  12 hour Dayshifts ( 06.00 hrs - 18.00 hrs ) and automatically woke at 5am the next day,  got washed and dressed and went into work ( 13 mile journey ) and went into my office before I realised I was due to start Nightshift that night at 6 PM !!.........TWAT !!
...........Ooohhh....How my colleagues laughed !!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Vestibule on 15 July, 2013, 08:08:47 AM
Hahah well done mate!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 July, 2013, 10:22:57 AM
well, I made it in for 8 - and found I wasn't due to start till 10.30. So I went home, doing some shopping on the way, and had another hour's kip!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 July, 2013, 02:02:13 PM
Can this weather just fuck off out of it now please? Was a nice novelty for a few days, but its having a really detrimental effect on my sleep, concentration and productivity now.

While we're at it, this persistent sore throat and cough I've had for the 10 days can do one as well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 15 July, 2013, 09:02:59 PM
My TV keeps switching itself off. I can't just switch it on with the remote either basically having to do the standard main power 'turn it off and on again' routine followed by the standby. I wouldn't mind if it happened once in a while but tonight it's done it every few minutes! So small in the scheme of things but really irritating.

I've been meaning to get a new one for a while (it's a CRT over a decade old. Not that others haven't lasted longer). Maybe I should use this as an excuse to start saving up...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 17 July, 2013, 03:20:40 AM
FFS – I'm sitting here working late and I just saw a mouse and I can hear it walking about.

I am in a really shitty situation for last months as we sold the flat and are temporarily living in my mother's house until we find our own house – so am sitting here in her living room surrounded by boxes of half of my belongings. The rest is in storage at extortionate cost.

If mice want to do damage to my stuff there is a heck of a lot they can do while I am in this situation.

There is one of those electric mouse repellant whatevers plugged in to a socket but I guess the beams it gives off are blocked by all my junk.

What a pain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 17 July, 2013, 03:52:17 AM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 17 July, 2013, 03:20:40 AM
There is one of those electric mouse repellant whatevers plugged in to a socket but I guess the beams it gives off are blocked by all my junk.

Those things are shit, mate. There's no substitute for a proper mousetrap.

Hang in there. This too shall pass. We're living with my dad gift now but found a rental that we can move into on Friday. The next step is hunting for a house we can buy. We'll get there in little steps, and so will you!

Best wishes

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 19 July, 2013, 07:44:23 PM
Just got some Jif bathroom spray in my eye. Mutha-fuc...

(Some might say that someone cleaning their bathroom on a beautiful sunny Friday evening gets everything they deserve).

Regards,
Cyclops Prime
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 09:14:31 AM
About 18 months ago I received a tax rebate a couple of days before my boiler packed in. The cost of the replacement boiler came to almost the exact amount of my rebate.

Yesterday I received another tax rebate for around £300 and this morning my dishwasher packed up.

Not sure what kind of luck I'm having here  :|.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 21 July, 2013, 03:29:59 PM
Something's up with my PC. It wouldn't boot until I unplugged the keyboard. Problem is, it's an old PS/2 keyboard so I couldn't plug it in after it started up. A restart seemed to help.

Hmm, strange.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 21 July, 2013, 03:36:32 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 09:14:31 AM
About 18 months ago I received a tax rebate a couple of days before my boiler packed in. The cost of the replacement boiler came to almost the exact amount of my rebate.

Yesterday I received another tax rebate for around £300 and this morning my dishwasher packed up.

Not sure what kind of luck I'm having here  :|.

Your dishwasher packing in is karma's way of telling you dont need a dishwasher.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 21 July, 2013, 05:45:01 PM
Quote from: sheldipez on 21 July, 2013, 03:36:32 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 09:14:31 AM
About 18 months ago I received a tax rebate a couple of days before my boiler packed in. The cost of the replacement boiler came to almost the exact amount of my rebate.

Yesterday I received another tax rebate for around £300 and this morning my dishwasher packed up.

Not sure what kind of luck I'm having here  :|.

Your dishwasher packing in is karma's way of telling you dont need a dishwasher.

That, or he should give the poor girl a holiday.

;-)
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 06:44:03 PM
Quote from: sheldipez on 21 July, 2013, 03:36:32 PM
Your dishwasher packing in is karma's way of telling you dont need a dishwasher.

Karma can get stuffed  ;). Anyway, I think I've fixed it.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 21 July, 2013, 07:32:13 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 06:44:03 PM
Quote from: sheldipez on 21 July, 2013, 03:36:32 PM
Your dishwasher packing in is karma's way of telling you dont need a dishwasher.

Karma can get stuffed  ;). Anyway, I think I've fixed it.

Just use the 3D printer to bash out a new machine, Rog. Or new dishes.

Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 08:15:39 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 21 July, 2013, 07:32:13 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 06:44:03 PM
Quote from: sheldipez on 21 July, 2013, 03:36:32 PM
Your dishwasher packing in is karma's way of telling you dont need a dishwasher.

Karma can get stuffed  ;). Anyway, I think I've fixed it.

Just use the 3D printer to bash out a new machine, Rog. Or new dishes.

Hmm, its certainly doable apart from the electronics and pump motors. I could print the casing in titanium and the plastic parts in ABS and hight temp resistant acrylic. I reckon I could bring the whole project in for under half a million.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 22 July, 2013, 12:23:19 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 08:15:39 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 21 July, 2013, 07:32:13 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 21 July, 2013, 06:44:03 PM
Quote from: sheldipez on 21 July, 2013, 03:36:32 PM
Your dishwasher packing in is karma's way of telling you dont need a dishwasher.
Karma can get stuffed  ;). Anyway, I think I've fixed it.
Just use the 3D printer to bash out a new machine, Rog. Or new dishes.

Hmm, its certainly doable apart from the electronics and pump motors. I could print the casing in titanium and the plastic parts in ABS and hight temp resistant acrylic. I reckon I could bring the whole project in for under half a million.

If you're investing in CNC equipment for this project, and if you have any spare nickel-brass alloy sitting around, you could 3D print your own pound coins.  The machine will literally pay for itself.

(Mind you, at half-an-hour per coin it'd take about 28 years.  And compound inflation would be a bugger.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 22 July, 2013, 02:00:57 PM
Quote from: Trout on 17 July, 2013, 03:52:17 AM
Those things are shit, mate. There's no substitute for a proper mousetrap.
Hang in there. This too shall pass. We're living with my dad gift now but found a rental that we can move into on Friday. The next step is hunting for a house we can buy. We'll get there in little steps, and so will you!
Best wishes
- Trout
Thanks Trout. Yeah, you are right. Need to persevere with house hunting. I just find it so boring. Prices are nuts around here so need to move a further out. Recently had an offer accepted on a house but couldn't get mortgage on it as it's such a wreck. Saw a fantastic house few days ago but it has a Japanese knot weed infestation. Day of the Triffids. Too risky. Seems that whenever we can just about afford anything there is always a catch. Good luck with your hunting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 24 July, 2013, 06:11:49 PM
My son's visual tracking problems, which cause him to have difficulty in reading, have worsened. He now has an issue where one eye tracks in a different way to the other (it's something to do with something called convergence - both eyes do not converge on a single object adequately). This can be corrected through a course of therapy with a specialist - which is not covered by the NHS... We are staring at the thick end of £450...

I guess that's what emergency savings are there for...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 July, 2013, 07:57:26 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 24 July, 2013, 06:11:49 PM
My son's visual tracking problems, which cause him to have difficulty in reading, have worsened. He now has an issue where one eye tracks in a different way to the other (it's something to do with something called convergence - both eyes do not converge on a single object adequately). This can be corrected through a course of therapy with a specialist - which is not covered by the NHS... We are staring at the thick end of £450...

I guess that's what emergency savings are there for...

That really sucks, how on earth is something like that not covered on the NHS?

My impediment is being the victim of possibly the worlds stupidest criminal.
I was alerted by a neighbour earlier that someone had smashed a bloody great hole in the side of my shed and got in to see if there was anything worth stealing. If they had taken a couple of seconds to look through the window it would have been quite obvious that all it contained was 2 rusty bird cages and a bunch of half finished paint cans.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 July, 2013, 08:44:58 PM
That's pretty crappy, Simeon, but good to hear that there is corrective therapy, even if it is pricey.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 24 July, 2013, 09:42:43 PM
Hope he isn't falling behind with reading, SimonB. Best of luck with the therapy. But yeah, I would've thought that would be covered by the NHS. Wonder why it isn't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 24 July, 2013, 09:51:07 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 24 July, 2013, 06:11:49 PM
My son's visual tracking problems, which cause him to have difficulty in reading, have worsened. He now has an issue where one eye tracks in a different way to the other (it's something to do with something called convergence - both eyes do not converge on a single object adequately). This can be corrected through a course of therapy with a specialist - which is not covered by the NHS... We are staring at the thick end of £450...

I'd echo everyone's astonishment that getting your wee boy the help he needs is going to leave you out of pocket, Simeon. It might be worth checking that you're not the victim of the postcode lottery. If that's the case, no-one could blame you for being a bit creative with what you tell the docs about your family's living arrangements.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 24 July, 2013, 10:11:11 PM
Appreciate the support, chaps. Firstly, and most importantly, whilst his condition is holding back his reading it is correctable with this therapy. He has already had therapy previously for a different problem with his eyes (to do with how the eyes track across lines of text) which, once again, had to be done privately, but it's just bad luck he now has developed this.

As for the NHS, they just don't seem to cover it. He is being seen by an optician, not through a GP or a hospital. We took him to this particular optician because these types of conditions in children are his specialty. It simply isn't understood enough in the UK. Our optician has even had the equipment he needs manufactured because it can't be sourced in this country. It's commonly diagnosed and treated in the US and Australia. It's called Vision Therapy, and there is more info on our opticians website http://www.eyezone.co.uk/pages/vision_therapy.php (http://www.eyezone.co.uk/pages/vision_therapy.php)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 24 July, 2013, 10:24:29 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 24 July, 2013, 10:11:11 PM
As for the NHS, they just don't seem to cover it.

Teaching my Granny to suck eggs here, but are you sure? Googling shows loads of NHS authorities with information on the basic home exercises for the condition you mentioned (https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=vision+convergence,+nhs&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&gws_rd=cr), which they say their orthoptists support with therapeutic sessions.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 24 July, 2013, 10:34:12 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 24 July, 2013, 10:24:29 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 24 July, 2013, 10:11:11 PM
As for the NHS, they just don't seem to cover it.

Teaching my Granny to suck eggs here, but are you sure? Googling shows loads of NHS authorities with information on the basic home exercises for the condition you mentioned (https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=vision+convergence,+nhs&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&gws_rd=cr), which they say their orthoptists support with therapeutic sessions.

That's very helpful, sauchie, thanks very much. I will look into this further...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 25 July, 2013, 10:44:22 AM
Quote from: SimeonB on 24 July, 2013, 10:34:12 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 24 July, 2013, 10:24:29 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 24 July, 2013, 10:11:11 PM
As for the NHS, they just don't seem to cover it.

Teaching my Granny to suck eggs here, but are you sure? Googling shows loads of NHS authorities with information on the basic home exercises for the condition you mentioned (https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=vision+convergence,+nhs&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&gws_rd=cr), which they say their orthoptists support with therapeutic sessions.

That's very helpful, sauchie, thanks very much. I will look into this further...

I hope that gets sorted. One of my sons has a super lazy eye that we're lucky that his prescription glasses sorted it out. It took a bloody long time to get him sorted (endless docs passing it off as "tiredness" in the early years until it to the point where it was constant and inescapable that there was an issue). There's nothing worse than this kind of stuff with your kids. We still put his lack of interest in reading down to his eyesight and recentlly introduced him to comics, which he actually enjoys reading and cant get enough of [those comics will be loved!].
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 25 July, 2013, 05:23:47 PM
Aye, wishing you, and your lad, all the best with this Simeon - and hopefully that link from Sauchie will be of some benifit.

And thats brilliant that your lad has discovered the joys of reading, via comics, sheldipez - now, how many of us here learnt that way, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 25 July, 2013, 09:42:26 PM
Again, really appreciate the support, chaps. Thank you. I have found a clinic that offers treatments for eyes in my local area that is NHS. I'm going to phone them tomorrow and see if they offer the therapy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 26 July, 2013, 02:01:48 AM
Best wishes with that SimeonB.....hope all goes well.......

Cheers....

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 29 July, 2013, 02:30:11 AM
Drank a coffee too late in the day yesterday, and as a result of my ridiculous sensitivity to caffeine am now wide awake at 2.30 in the morning, wandering round my flat. Need to be up in 4.5 hours. Damn it! Why do I never learn?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 30 July, 2013, 01:12:20 PM
Quote from: radiator on 29 July, 2013, 02:30:11 AM
Damn it! Why do I never learn?

Cause no-one ever does, about anything.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 01 August, 2013, 12:02:58 AM
Pre-Christmas, I agreed to my brother's mail being sent to my address Care of after he assured me no bailiffs would come hounding my address. His mail was supposed to stop coming here in March, but I'm still getting mail for him. Sometimes, it's not even Care of- it's his name and my address. The envelopes have stamped on them IMPORTANT INFORMATION AND DOCUMENTS ENCLOSED and THIS IS NOT A CIRCULAR OPEN IMMEDIATELY. So I've been sending them back return to sender, not residing here etc. The last letter was hand delivered.
Today, my doorbell went and I ignored it. Then I heard a few other doorbells going shortly before I had somebody pounding at my door. Obviously, I ignored it but I'm assuming it was bailiffs. I'm also wondering who exactly in the building went downstairs and stepped aside when somebody at the door said, "Bailiffs" instead of saying "And?" before closing the door in their face. So yeah, having bailiffs at your door when you don't actually owe any money at all is heaps of fun.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: LorcanQ on 01 August, 2013, 01:23:24 PM
Living in Ireland, the summer holidays for college is four (yes, four!) months long. Looked everywhere for a job, very few around. Luckily, i got an interview for a summer job as one of those dress-up/tour guide type people in a newly refurbished medieval castle heritage site. Interview went as well as could be expected. Got a call the next week, was told I'd got the job, there was an orientation day end of the week. Absolutely delighted, have never had a proper job before. Living in the countryside in ireland, there's few jobs around, especially if your parents dont have strong connections in the community. Was feeling fantastic, thinking of actually having my own money for a change.

Phoned the manager the next day to ask what the dress code was for the orientation. She told me she had forgotten to tell me the day before, that I was actually a RESERVE worker, ie. I'd only get a job if someone pulled out who was actually working there. In fact, she reckoned, there was little point in me going to the orientation and, if another job was to arise for me, i should definitely take it. in other words, i didn't get the job. Fucking raging. ARGHHH
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 August, 2013, 01:41:54 PM
That is pretty crappy, Lorcan, and unbelievably unprofessional.  Hopefully someone will pull out, but it has to raise questions about what kind of outfit you would be working with.  My old man is a tour guide, and I'm hoping to get some work in that line myself once the kids are back in their cages school - it'd be great if you could PM with the name of the castle in question, I'd be fascinated to know where to avoid!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 02 August, 2013, 01:26:13 PM
Bloody hell Lorcan that's a knife in the eye - ! Sounds like a grand job as well, although clearly it's being run by a bunch of fools - !

I went to London for a job interview yesterday - for BASICALLY my dream job - not sure it went that well. Turns out blind enthusiasm for comics isn't as good as actual commercial experience :( sigh - back to the dole queue!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: LorcanQ on 02 August, 2013, 05:10:42 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 August, 2013, 01:41:54 PM
That is pretty crappy, Lorcan, and unbelievably unprofessional.  Hopefully someone will pull out, but it has to raise questions about what kind of outfit you would be working with.  My old man is a tour guide, and I'm hoping to get some work in that line myself once the kids are back in their cages school - it'd be great if you could PM with the name of the castle in question, I'd be fascinated to know where to avoid!

I got the acception/rejection back at the beginning of May so I've more or less given up hope at this stage but ah well, what's done is done! It was King John's Castle in Limerick if you're interested. I'd say the actual Castle would be professional I just think that that particular HR manager was very incompetent. Also, she actually worked for Shannon Heritage (based in bunratty castle) which deals with all the historic attractions in the local area, so the castle's outfit would probably be a separate body from her's. The most annoying aspect was that I had to actually call back to find out. Otherwise I would have had to turn up to the orientation day to get the rejection...


Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 02 August, 2013, 01:26:13 PM
Bloody hell Lorcan that's a knife in the eye - ! Sounds like a grand job as well, although clearly it's being run by a bunch of fools - !

I went to London for a job interview yesterday - for BASICALLY my dream job - not sure it went that well. Turns out blind enthusiasm for comics isn't as good as actual commercial experience :( sigh - back to the dole queue!

Ah the old "not enough experience" response! It's a kind of Catch-22 situation there. We can't get the job cos we don't have enough experience but then we can't get enough experience cos we can't get the job! What's getting increasingly popular for business's around my way is for people to get "internships", which means the interns get to keep their dole money, and get an extra 50 euro a week from the business while they learn the business's skill set. This would make technical sense for a difficult job, but if the job is something like stacking shelves it's quite a disgrace to offer an internship for it, which i've noticed actually happens! It also means summer jobs during college are out of the question unless you have good connections... God damned recession!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 August, 2013, 06:46:03 PM
Orange appear to have transferred my mobile number and account to someone with the same name as me, and who lives in Nottingham. That, or my identity has been cloned in some way. ~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 08 August, 2013, 05:17:41 PM
Job interview DEFINITELY didn't go well. It was my last swing at getting a job before my current job ends tomorrow as well...

so, that's me on the dole then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 08 August, 2013, 05:39:42 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 08 August, 2013, 05:17:41 PM
Job interview DEFINITELY didn't go well. It was my last swing at getting a job before my current job ends tomorrow as well...

so, that's me on the dole then.

That's too bad cfm. I hope something comes up for you soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 13 August, 2013, 02:26:40 AM
Well, yet again I've wasted hours of my life trying to catch a glimpse of a meteor shower through sodding endless cloud cover, while the mainstream media taunts me by explaining that everybody else on the planet can see it fine.

When I'm world leader & dictator-in-chief-for-life I shall install a special weather machine above the skies of Southport, to ensure that we never see another bastard cloud again (and also so we get snow at the same time as the rest of the country).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 August, 2013, 09:55:48 AM
Im posting this from the sunny islend of Guernsey...and we have a major wasp problem. Fuck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 14 August, 2013, 10:06:46 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 14 August, 2013, 09:55:48 AM
Im posting this from the sunny islend of Guernsey...and we have a major wasp problem. Fuck.

Look on the bright side; seventy years ago it would have been Nazis (http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/topics/occupation_channel_islands). Those little buggers ruin more picnics than wasps.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 14 August, 2013, 03:04:21 PM
The key broke off my lunchtime tin of sardines when I tried to open it.  I tried to use an ordinary can-opener, which went horribly wrong.  My entire desk now stinks of fishy tomato sauce.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 14 August, 2013, 03:18:01 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 14 August, 2013, 03:04:21 PM
The key broke off my lunchtime tin of sardines when I tried to open it.  I tried to use an ordinary can-opener, which went horribly wrong.  My entire desk now stinks of fishy tomato sauce.

That's what you get you sicko!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lr8nL06PS24
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 14 August, 2013, 04:50:42 PM
Ha!  Forgot all about that scene!  Loved that film - watched it over and over on VHS back in the day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 14 August, 2013, 05:28:07 PM
Yeah, love that movie too. An 80's gem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 15 August, 2013, 11:13:15 AM
Quote from: sauchie on 14 August, 2013, 10:06:46 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 14 August, 2013, 09:55:48 AM
Im posting this from the sunny islend of Guernsey...and we have a major wasp problem. Fuck.

Look on the bright side; seventy years ago it would have been Nazis (http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/topics/occupation_channel_islands). Those little buggers ruin more picnics than wasps.
I've been forced to put a few of the flying swine into "quarantine  showers"...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 15 August, 2013, 06:35:43 PM

The girls' toilet at work was full of those pissed-up, sleepy wasps who are just lying around waiting to die. I must have hoovered up about forty of them, but I did get that horrible shiver of realisation that I was basically Heydrich for Hymenoptera.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 August, 2013, 03:28:03 PM
Just burnt my fucking fingers on a fucking pop tart! Molten icing stuck to my fingertips - agonising!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 16 August, 2013, 03:52:21 PM
Pop Tarts are bad for your health - just ask John Travolta.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 16 August, 2013, 06:08:53 PM
Pop Tarts are the food of the gods, and if I go out like Elvis, it will be Pop Tarts instead of burgers...

Mind you, they do come out of the toaster hotter than the surface of the sun...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 16 August, 2013, 06:26:52 PM
There's a double entendre about tarts popping in here somewhere.

The only tart I want to pop is...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 August, 2013, 08:31:58 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 16 August, 2013, 06:08:53 PM
Pop Tarts are the food of the gods, and if I go out like Elvis, it will be Pop Tarts instead of burgers...

Mind you, they do come out of the toaster hotter than the surface of the sun...

You can only get strawberry and chocolate in the UK, but you can get all the awesome flavours if you can find an American sweet shop.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 16 August, 2013, 09:06:50 PM
Quote from: radiator on 16 August, 2013, 08:31:58 PM

You can only get strawberry and chocolate in the UK, but you can get all the awesome flavours if you can find an American sweet shop.

And now cherry and apple too in the UK. But the US version of Apple & Cinnamon was nicer until they stopped making it :(

Of course, it's not just the icing that cause issues. The insides will cause 2nd degree burns in moments. I think Pop Tarts are possibly the most dangerous food stuff ever invented...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 16 August, 2013, 11:07:47 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 16 August, 2013, 09:06:50 PM
Of course, it's not just the icing that cause issues. The insides will cause 2nd degree burns in moments. I think Pop Tarts are possibly the most dangerous food stuff ever invented...

Yep, agree with that SimeonB,
Took mine out of the toaster and waited about 3 - 4 minutes to let it cool down.....Then touched the pastry around the edges, and thought Ok it's now cool enough to eat ......
Took a bite and it instantly stuck to the roof of my mouth............It was still like molten lava inside...WTF !!
Next two days spent with a really sore and 'blistered' roof of my mouth..... :'(
They should carry a Health Warning ( like cigarettes )...
Still love them though !!
Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 17 August, 2013, 07:16:43 AM
Ooo nasty, Bob. One must adopt the 'nibble' approach, followed by gasping at cool air, in order to ensure that enough air is mixed with molten interior to cool it sufficiently before burning takes place.

Surely we are due a scientific study in this vital area of food consumption?

(Am eating a strawberry pop tart whilst typing this) :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 17 August, 2013, 09:57:30 AM
I've never had a Pop Tart. Can you eat them raw?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 17 August, 2013, 11:08:48 AM
I don't know about eating them but after reading about their heat retaining properties on this thread, I'm considering replacing my roof tiles with them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 17 August, 2013, 06:48:56 PM
I seem to have discovered my purpose in life; advising on Pop Tarts. Brilliant! I'm giving up the day job...

James You could eat a Pop Tart raw. But where's the fun in that and I expect it would taste godawful...

Rog This could be like 1001 things you can use WD-40 for. 1001 uses for Pop Tarts. Heat shields for rockets re- entering the Earth's atmosphere, nuclear bunker reinforcement, oven linings...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 21 August, 2013, 09:52:05 AM
Meeting up with people you've not seen in 20yrs = good.

Drinking on this occasion like you did 20yrs ago = not so good.

Returning home and emailing an editor what you think is wrong with the script you were offered = erm...

Bathing in the warm after glow of a burnt bridge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 August, 2013, 10:57:38 AM
The Boy is finally back at school after an Actual SummerTM, meaning this is the last (scheduled) morning alone for me and the Girl before she starts Montessori on Monday.  After this their holidays will be synched and it'll be all three of us or none.  Had many grand plans involving ice-creams and playgrounds to mark the occasion, but we seem to be settled into a morning of tea parties, TV and Lego, which I suppose is okay too.  I'll miss our time together, not least because it allowed me imagine some sort of useful role for myself, but I know I've been unbelievably lucky to have had it at all.

It also means my deadline to find or create 'proper' work (i.e. something in my area of expertise that I could make a decent living from) for myself is well and truly up.  As of Monday I'm going to go out and try to get whatever minimum wage job I can find, since now both kids have effectively free child care in the mornings, I can probably just about afford to cover the afternoons, which I definitely couldn't before.  On the positive side, if I succeed I'll no longer have to listen to the keyboard warriors and phone-in experts who know that 'my kind' spend our days drinking Dutch Gold in the park in between our three holidays a year in Magaluf, all at the taxpayers' expense. 

As I'm presently being sued in the High Court for unimaginable sums of money re: my former company's ever-increasing debts and still trying to chart the least-worst course into personal bankruptcy (i.e. the one that saves our house) through new insolvency legislation, as well as still being under escalating pressure to finish working through archiving the backlog we left behind, I think the idea of getting a new business going is now officially dead, although realistically it was probably never alive.

Roger said it best:

Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 13 June, 2012, 10:26:48 PM
I ran a company where I dug stuff up for money but then I dug all the stuff up and there wasn't stuff to dig up anymore and I had to do another thing now :(

Anyhow.  Back to the empty teacups.  I'll miss them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 30 August, 2013, 11:43:50 AM
That's a story full of melancholy. I just wish you all the best, mate. For whatever life has in store for you next. I'm pretty sure it was one of your posts that gave me the idea of reading comics to my son. He is alive with enthusiasm for the whole venture. We finished Harry 20 last night and he gave me a big hug and said "Thank you for reading me your comics, Daddy, they are brilliant."

So thanks for giving me the idea, Tordelback, you're brilliant  :D



...and if it wasn't you, take the credit anyway :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 31 August, 2013, 10:04:38 AM

I abandoned the idea of fulfilment through my job a long time ago, TB. I do boring physical work during the day, which means I'll never have to spend money on gym membership and I have a lot of free mental time to think about the crap which actually interests me. You're a very knowledgeable and perceptive fella and you write well; I don't think it would be impossible to find a way of using those talents to do something more fulfilling with your free time, after you get home from a McJob, and maybe earn a bob or two to pay for little extras while you're at it.

Best of luck.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zarjazzer on 31 August, 2013, 10:12:25 AM
Slightly hungover. Failed miserably to impress this lovely lady last night. Probably because I was slobbering. Ow! Oh well. :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 03 September, 2013, 03:20:55 PM
Quote from: radiator on 07 July, 2013, 11:04:38 AM
Away on holiday at the moment, so have been a bit out of the loop. Checked my Twitter this morning to find I had a direct message from a certain famous movie type dated two days ago.

Putting two and two together, I think I know what it related to, but think I may have missed the boat now!

So, finally got some follow-up on this today, two months on, so that's that little mystery solved (tbh since I never heard anything else I had convinced myself the DM must have been some sort of spam thing and I was a gullible twat).

It turns out it's..... pretty exciting, but not as exciting as the possibilities of what my overactive imagination had built it up to be... A bit of a damp squib really. Ah well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 07 September, 2013, 03:01:58 PM
Packing to go on a 2 week trip for work and it appears that I don't own enough pairs of underpants to cover the duration.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 07 September, 2013, 10:42:58 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 07 September, 2013, 03:01:58 PM
Packing to go on a 2 week trip for work and it appears that I don't own enough pairs of underpants to cover the duration.

Don't be silly, just take seven pairs and turn them inside out
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 07 September, 2013, 10:54:04 PM
Quote from: Tombo on 07 September, 2013, 10:42:58 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 07 September, 2013, 03:01:58 PM
Packing to go on a 2 week trip for work and it appears that I don't own enough pairs of underpants to cover the duration.

Don't be silly, just take seven pairs and turn them inside out
Or better still, 4 pairs and turn them back to front and inside out AND back to front.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 September, 2013, 11:03:00 PM
I bought myself a lovely hunk of braising steak for my dinner, set it simmering with onions, mushrooms and a splosh of red wine, then nodded off and incinerated it. Bollox. Had a cheese'n'pickle sandwich instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 08 September, 2013, 01:31:49 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 07 September, 2013, 11:03:00 PM
I bought myself a lovely hunk of braising steak for my dinner, set it simmering with onions, mushrooms and a splosh of red wine, then nodded off and incinerated it. Bollox. Had a cheese'n'pickle sandwich instead.

Is the pan you were cooking the steak in crocked as well? Lucky you didn't have a kitchen fire though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 September, 2013, 03:22:01 PM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 08 September, 2013, 01:31:49 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 07 September, 2013, 11:03:00 PM
I bought myself a lovely hunk of braising steak for my dinner, set it simmering with onions, mushrooms and a splosh of red wine, then nodded off and incinerated it. Bollox. Had a cheese'n'pickle sandwich instead.

Is the pan you were cooking the steak in crocked as well? Lucky you didn't have a kitchen fire though.

The pan was soaked overnight and is amazingly fine. We're protected by smoke alarms wired into the mains, but it was the smell of burning onions that woke me before they had gone off - which is just as well, cos when they do go off, you can't stop the bastards except by dispersing the smoke!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 September, 2013, 08:05:32 AM
For those who don't know, I've been suffering with anxiety and depression for the last 5 years and have pretty much led a recluses life as a result. Ive been able to help myself a bit by going to college and forming a social circle, but I still had intense aggressive rages for no reason. In march this culminated in a moment of loud noise and I lashed out at the 5 year old sibling. It was en I finally decided to go and see a therapist. After a 6 month wait (!) I finally saw someone of Tuesday. Two days later and I'm starting the course. Madness! Im a little bit anxious about this as its a group session and I'm not very keen on sharing my life story with someone who isn't a professional psychologist or doctor.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 September, 2013, 08:10:20 AM
Good on you, Hawkmonger, you're a braver man than me: I reckon this probably belongs in the '...sometimes sort of okay' thread!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 12 September, 2013, 12:34:58 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 12 September, 2013, 08:05:32 AM
...Im a little bit anxious about this as its a group session and I'm not very keen on sharing my life story with someone who isn't a professional psychologist or doctor.

Good stuff fella! You've not only admitted to having a problem but made the first steps in doing something about it, so that's the most difficult bridge already crossed. A fair few of the folks from this parish have had similar problems at one stage or another*, so you're among sympathetic friends.

*An oddly high proportion, actually, including myself. Must be something to do with introverted/creative types.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 September, 2013, 12:46:07 PM
Hope that treatment goes well for you Hawkmonger - you've taken the hardest step already. remember the rest of the group will be in the same boat - they'll be just as uncomfortable opening up in front of you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 September, 2013, 01:16:43 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 12 September, 2013, 12:34:58 PM
*An oddly high proportion, actually, including myself. Must be something to do with introverted/creative types.

Strongest correlation is with exposure to Thrill Power.  Don't tell the Daily Mail: "Mucky Mag makes Mentlers".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 12 September, 2013, 01:20:14 PM
Tell you what, Hawkmonger, I have OCD ("genuine" OCD- not the complaint minor celebrities have of chuckling "I'm a bit OCD" or, as I vaguely remember Beckham once saying- his OCD means he can only have an equal number of Pepsi cans in his refrigerator at any given time. Hope Pepsi gave him the money he so desperately needed for that plug!) and have been forced onto 'the sick' because of it a few times over the years. Seriously, I'm on 50mgs of Clomipramine a day. My phone is full of pictures of things being turned off and/or securely locked so I can leave the home and sometimes, even that doesn't work and I'm stuck in. I rarely went into uni (luckily, all tutorial powerpoints were online and essays could be handed in as such) and a lot of the time, I can't work to a time schedule that doesn't fit the routine I've got myself into. Seriously, a night out with friends means they basically have to come and pick me up so they can assure me everything is sorted when we leave! It's worse when I have to travel a distance and my GP recently sorted out a psychiatrist for me to see (parents always figured I'd end up seeing one someday or another...) but unfortunately, it was too far away for my liking and I'm now waiting for another offer of somebody closer.
I'm guessing, like me, you're embarrassed of certain rituals you've got going to make yourself comfortable (and people getting onto these) and you're embarrassed about admitting the reasons to people. As Dandontdare pointed out, you're going to be with people who have the same complaint as you; somebody may even have a 'stronger' condition, so you've no reason to be anxious when, in the long run, this could be just what you need. But if you find yourself struggling to get into these meetings at any time for whatever reason, the doctor should surely be able to get you down for one-on-one sessions until you're able to go to groups- otherwise the doctor is essentially saying there's nothing they can do for you when they know full well there is. Bit of a lengthy message just to reach that point but all the best mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 13 September, 2013, 08:37:11 AM
Thank you everyone for the kind words and consolidation on the matter. The first session went swimmingly. I not know if it's churlish of me to say I was the least afflicted there but most of my room mates seemed to have been drug abusers and/ or alcoholics that seemed to have ran out of rope to climb so to speak. One poor chap spoke about how he lost his ego and will to care on an acid trip. Never having taken drugs I can't say I was empathetic but I could understand his position of hopelessness. It was interesting to learn though that my profile as a patient suffering from depression was out dated 2 years ago, and the feeling of misery I've had recently is just due to general social awkwardness normal of someone with my autism. Over all I'm glad I went even if it was just an early induction into the environment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 September, 2013, 09:10:30 AM
Good news Hawkmonger, although it does seem to be a group somewhat at odds with your specific issues.  Still, if you have to be a nutjob it doesn't hurt to be the McMurphy of the class - up to a point of course.   ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 September, 2013, 04:05:58 PM
Hope it all goes well for you Hawkmonger. You are now on the first step and that must be the hardest step to take to take out of them all. I wish you all the best!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 13 September, 2013, 06:13:13 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 13 September, 2013, 08:37:11 AM
The first session went swimmingly. I not know if it's churlish of me to say I was the least afflicted there

I think that's part of the point of group therapy. Seeing your own problems and behaviour writ large - and seeing how others with bigger hurdles than yourself overcome them - makes you better able to understand them and makes you feel more positive about your own prospects. Dealing with people in regular life, it's easy to imagine that negotiating social situations and the world of work comes easy to others, and that you're some kind of freak - but most folk are just putting on a good front.

Well done for getting the help you need, Hawkmonger.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 September, 2013, 06:57:36 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 13 September, 2013, 06:13:13 PMDealing with people in regular life, it's easy to imagine that negotiating social situations and the world of work comes easy to others, and that you're some kind of freak - but most folk are just putting on a good front.

Amen, brother.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 13 September, 2013, 06:57:58 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 12 September, 2013, 12:34:58 PMAn oddly high proportion, actually, including myself. Must be something to do with introverted/creative types.

Most boarders are Scottish or Irish - hence depression.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 13 September, 2013, 07:42:42 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 13 September, 2013, 06:57:58 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 12 September, 2013, 12:34:58 PMAn oddly high proportion, actually, including myself. Must be something to do with introverted/creative types.

Most boarders are Scottish or Irish - hence depression.

Hence our favourite soundbite; http://youtu.be/hUVwR0rw5fk

On a serious note- good on you Hawk, hope it works out for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 13 September, 2013, 09:59:40 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 13 September, 2013, 06:57:58 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 12 September, 2013, 12:34:58 PMAn oddly high proportion, actually, including myself. Must be something to do with introverted/creative types.
Most boarders are Scottish or Irish - hence depression.
But I like feeling down. Isn't that what heritage means?

Seriously though, well played Hawkmonger.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 September, 2013, 07:17:28 PM
Girlfriend working late, flat to myself, nothing pressig to do.... And my copy of GTAV is tantalisingly out of reach - gah!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 September, 2013, 11:22:36 AM
I stretched yesterday afternoon and twisted something in my back, near the top just inside the shoulder blade. After an uncomfortable night it's still bloody sore. Only hurts when I move though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 17 September, 2013, 12:33:00 PM
Something happened on the way to work this morning that hasn't happened for ages.

I was walking to work very early this morning and there was hardly anyone around. I rushed to catch the Pelican Crossing which put me about 5 paces behind an attractive girl. We then seemed to be totally in sync and each time I went to cross a road or turn a corner, she would make the same move a nano-second before, which, in my mind, made it look like I was following her.
We were fast approaching a seldom used alley that I use as a short cut. I thought this would be my escape from the situation as this route is hardly used. So what does she do? Yep - straight down rapist alley.
I considered changing my route but didn't really see why I should as I'd done nothing wrong. I followed my usual route and bit the bullet. I'm pretty sure she was looking out of the corner of her eye and checking out if I was following her from the reflections in the windows. I just kept going and tried to look as innocent as possible - I thought if I slowed down or sped up it might freak her out! I kind of wished I'd changed my route after all.
Fortunately at the end of the alley she went in a different direction.
I hate situations like this. I was innocently walking to work and ended up in some sort of tactical situation where I had to try to act as non-rapist-like as possible.
I'm not normally this paranoid but I hate situations like this. Maybe it's all in my mind.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 September, 2013, 01:00:24 PM
I never know what to do in that situation - walk more slowly? Speed up to overtake? Call out that you're not a rapist/mugger?

Once got picked up by a lone woman when hitch-hiking - she rolled down the window and asked "you're not a rapist or anything are you?". I replied "Well Monday to Friday I am actually, but you're lucky it's the weekend"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 17 September, 2013, 04:40:59 PM

If it is any  comfort on the odd times that I have been out at such an hour... everybody appears to be just as nervous of others ...

everybody is walking/ waiting for a bus with the thought... "I'm here legitamatly....donno about you though... keep your distance... don't hurt me...."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 23 September, 2013, 12:23:54 PM
Dropping out of college. Im just not doing well enough. Feel a bit shit tbh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 23 September, 2013, 12:48:30 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 23 September, 2013, 12:23:54 PM
Dropping out of college. Im just not doing well enough. Feel a bit shit tbh.

I know that I don't know much about your situation, but I would say hang in there (or at least look into an alternative course or something).

I came very close to dropping out of uni for various reasons, but in retrospect I am extremely thankful that I stuck with it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 September, 2013, 12:49:43 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 23 September, 2013, 12:23:54 PM
Dropping out of college. Im just not doing well enough. Feel a bit shit tbh.

Whatever you decide to do Hawkmonger, don't be too hasty - have a chat with tutor/department and explain your problems to them if you haven't already, and there may be support they can give you.  You have a hell of a lot going on at the moment, and from your posts here it's obvious that you are moving in a difficult but ultimately positive direction: anyone you confide in is going to have respect for you and your efforts.  No-one in the teaching game wants their students to feel isolated or out of their depth.

Even if you can't improve college matters straight away, and do make a clear decision to leave, there shouldn't be any need to burn bridges - lecturers and even admin types will be understanding of difficulties if they know about them, and if you change your mind in the future or want to engage with something else in the same college, it's worth retaining their good opinion. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 23 September, 2013, 12:50:12 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 23 September, 2013, 12:23:54 PM
Dropping out of college. Im just not doing well enough. Feel a bit shit tbh.

dude thats a shame, not the end of the world, but might feel like it at times, important thing is to stay busy
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 23 September, 2013, 12:56:39 PM
sorry to hear that mate. You've had a lot on your plate judging by other posts you've made, so I hope you can go back and complete your studies at some point when things are more settled
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 23 September, 2013, 04:21:58 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 23 September, 2013, 12:23:54 PM
Dropping out of college. Im just not doing well enough. Feel a bit shit tbh.
I'd suggest you try to get this sorted but if you can't for any reason, it's not so uncommon for people to go into college and not do their best- only to return at a later date and do it all a lot better.
If you do decide to leave, I personally would look into starting an apprenticeship of some sort if I were you. My dad tried to get me to do one when I was younger but I didn't listen and, to be honest, I have regretted it from time to time. You could do an apprenticeship, end up being employed through it and return to college at another time if you felt like giving it another go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Recrewt on 23 September, 2013, 05:01:30 PM
Yeah, sorry to hear that also.  I know that myself and many of my friends dropped out, changed courses, and u-turned throughout college and university.  I would advise thinking about what you want to do next before making any decision though.  Talk to the college too, they can actually be quite helpful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 23 September, 2013, 05:01:52 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 23 September, 2013, 12:23:54 PM
Dropping out of college. Im just not doing well enough. Feel a bit shit tbh.

Don't feel shit about it mate - it takes backbone to admit when things ain't working out, and choose a different direction suddenly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 23 September, 2013, 05:45:58 PM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 23 September, 2013, 04:21:58 PM
(I)t's not so uncommon for people to go into college and not do their best- only to return at a later date and do it all a lot better. You could do an apprenticeship, end up being employed through it and return to college at another time if you felt like giving it another go.

Your college should be amenable to letting you defer your place for another year at least, or maybe doing something that only means attending a couple of days a week until you feel up to more.

I started college a month after my Dad died, made a total hash of it, dropped out, and ended up being bounced into doing a work placement. After working for a few years I was able to put myself through uni, and because I was used to actually having to work for a living studying seemed piss easy and I was the class swot.

Even if you feel you need to concentrate on getting your head sorted out you're better off doing something in the meantime - stacking shelves or volunteering in a charity shop gives you a bit of structure and something to think about other than yourself. All the best, Hawkmonger

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2013, 08:54:11 AM
I was certain I was on a late shift today (alarm set for 10am) so stayed up late - got  horrible shock when it went off at 6.30 'cos I'm on an early today and my late is tomorrow. At work now, drinking strong coffee and yawning a lot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 24 September, 2013, 10:37:26 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2013, 08:54:11 AM
I was certain I was on a late shift today (alarm set for 10am) so stayed up late - got  horrible shock when it went off at 6.30 'cos I'm on an early today and my late is tomorrow. At work now, drinking strong coffee and yawning a lot.

Try these Dan- http://www.redkooga.co.uk/default.aspx?pid=3&prodid=5.

The closest legal answer to your current predicament.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2013, 11:27:10 AM
I tried guarana in the past and didn't really notice much affect. In fact I'm the same with coffee - I don't notice it waking me up until it's got to the point where I've a headache and everything sounds harsh and jangly and I start biting people's heads off.

What I need is a nice long nap .... mmmmm. There's an almost physical pleasure to illicit napping in the daytime
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 September, 2013, 11:29:17 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2013, 11:27:10 AM
I tried guarana in the past and didn't really notice much affect. In fact I'm the same with coffee...

Quick dose of thrill-power right to the receptors, that'll do it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 24 September, 2013, 06:02:13 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 24 September, 2013, 11:27:10 AM
I tried guarana in the past and didn't really notice much affect. In fact I'm the same with coffee

Three words...

Kendal Mint Cake.

I don't know what the hell they put in it, but it's the only thing that's ever worked for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 September, 2013, 06:23:45 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 24 September, 2013, 06:02:13 PM
I don't know what the hell they put in it...

Sugar, glucose, and peppermint.  'S on the back.



;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 24 September, 2013, 06:40:10 PM
Thanks to everyone who replied to my moan yesterday. Luckily today has made me feel a lot more optimistic and tomorrow i'll be able to make a proper judgement as to where I go from here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 02 October, 2013, 03:00:03 PM
Ok, serious talk time. I decided to drop out. Being truth full, I'm relieved. The anxiety it was causing me was terrible, because of the pressure from this year piled onto the previous (I got some shocking As results) and I kinda realised that this was a major reason for my stress issues. Ive been off for a week and a half and its finally set in that I'm no longer in full time education. Truth be told, I broke down in tears and spent most of today crying, job searching, crying, eating and watching reruns of Open All Hours to make me feel better. I have a new plan of action, I have enrolled in an access course at the OU that starts in February, until then I'm upping my voluntary work time from a few hours a week to a few DAYS a week with Lancashire Wildlife Trust and Bolton Autistic Society (Boltonkids2gether. This charity was pretty much my life line when I was suicidal as a teenager and i cant express my gratitude to them enough, so it kinda stands to reason I try my hardest) and I'm desperately looking around for work (of which Bolton is hardly renowned for it, most of my applications have been to retail parks or out of town. God I hate this town). And you know what, despite my body screaming at me for being in a different place than usual and todays reminisces, I'm a much happier person at the minuet. It feels so good not having those awful As results hanging over my head anymore and I feel like I've been reinvigorated with a new desire to improve my way word journey in life and hopefully, with a bit of luck, I can still achieve my aspiration even with out brick and mortar qualifications like A levels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 02 October, 2013, 03:20:09 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 02 October, 2013, 03:00:03 PM
Ok, serious talk time. I decided to drop out. Being truth full, I'm relieved. The anxiety it was causing me was terrible, because of the pressure from this year piled onto the previous (I got some shocking As results) and I kinda realised that this was a major reason for my stress issues. Ive been off for a week and a half and its finally set in that I'm no longer in full time education. Truth be told, I broke down in tears and spent most of today crying, job searching, crying, eating and watching reruns of Open All Hours to make me feel better. I have a new plan of action, I have enrolled in an access course at the OU that starts in February, until then I'm upping my voluntary work time from a few hours a week to a few DAYS a week with Lancashire Wildlife Trust and Bolton Autistic Society (Boltonkids2gether. This charity was pretty much my life line when I was suicidal as a teenager and i cant express my gratitude to them enough, so it kinda stands to reason I try my hardest) and I'm desperately looking around for work (of which Bolton is hardly renowned for it, most of my applications have been to retail parks or out of town. God I hate this town). And you know what, despite my body screaming at me for being in a different place than usual and todays reminisces, I'm a much happier person at the minuet. It feels so good not having those awful As results hanging over my head anymore and I feel like I've been reinvigorated with a new desire to improve my way word journey in life and hopefully, with a bit of luck, I can still achieve my aspiration even with out brick and mortar qualifications like A levels.

I honestly think that further education qualifications are becoming less and less important to many employers. I was sorting through applications just yesterday and I'm far more interested in what people have to say for themselves than how many A levels they have.
I think that being able to cite voluntary work for two organisations and to show that you've overcome some personal difficulty and yet are still actively seeking employment stands you in good stead.
And the OU's a good call providing you have decent time management skills.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 02 October, 2013, 05:26:04 PM
Hope things come together for you Hawkmonger. Sometimes we have to listen to our instincts and not pursue something if it just doesn't feel like it's the right thing to do. Sounds like you have a plan to keep busy which is very important. Good luck with it all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 October, 2013, 06:31:03 PM
Certainly not my place to tell you whether what you're doing is right or wrong, but it sounds like you have given it careful thought and have arrived at some goals and a definite plan of action to get to them.  Good man.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 02 October, 2013, 06:34:36 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 02 October, 2013, 05:26:04 PM
Hope things come together for you Hawkmonger. Sometimes we have to listen to our instincts and not pursue something if it just doesn't feel like it's the right thing to do. Sounds like you have a plan to keep busy which is very important. Good luck with it all.

What Supes said.

I'd also hazard a guess that you're young enough to change your mind again at a later stage if you so wish (I only 'finished' college at 30 meself).

Best of luck to ya.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Sideshow Bob on 03 October, 2013, 06:55:06 PM
Also hope things come together for you, Hawkmonger......
Take some time out to decide where YOU really want to go.......but try and keep as busy as possible while taking the 'time out'....Although it sounds like you're getting that part organised anyway......

Speaking as someone who was fairly bright,  but 'seriously conflicted' during my formal education and left school with mediocre qualifications........I would strongly recommend the OU 'route'......
Be aware though,  that it's not cheap,  and ( depending on what you study ) may take several years.......  However you're removed a little from Exam stress, as the work you do during the year ( assignments & essays ) contribute 50% of your overall year total,  and the final exam the other 50%.....This means that if you do well in your course work, that the final exam is not a 'do or die'  type affair......which seems to suit a lot of people better..
You'll also find people of all ages and backgrounds ( some working, some not ) doing this as well, which I found helped me enormously...
However, as JamesC pointed out you do need to manage your time carefully,  to ensure you 'keep up'...
Good luck anyway...

Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 12 October, 2013, 10:13:19 AM
So, a few weeks ago I put forward a suggestion at work- a new way to work out productivity and staffing  requirements.  Simple statistics rather than the current method, which is to just guess.  Its a simple change which could make a big difference to the way things are done.  All very boring. Quite effective.  Management are interested.  They want more information.

And today...idea is rejected. 

Fair enough,these things happen.  But the reason for the rejection was genius.  Those in charge would like to continue to guess rather than use facts, because facts make them look bad.  Guessing may be ridiculous, but a change would bring this to peoples attention.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 12 October, 2013, 11:43:46 AM
Quote from: Temponaut on 12 October, 2013, 10:13:19 AM
Those in charge would like to continue to guess rather than use facts, because facts make them look bad.  Guessing may be ridiculous, but a change would bring this to peoples attention.

All power structures maintain the status quo they manage because their system has developed enough for them to control it. Management tend to be on a higher pay grade or have higher status than subordinates and this status and the resulting  privileges that go with it might come into question if accurate numbers reveal that there are too many Chiefs and not enough Indians. Great way to make yourself 'surplus to requirements.' So though Companies love to claim they like to hear new ideas they realize soon enough  that this might upset the current hierarchy; the one they are usually benefitting from and therefore new ideas are always entertained -and then judiciously ignored.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 October, 2013, 04:36:51 PM
I just had to buy a Jonathan and Charlotte CD.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 October, 2013, 04:40:51 PM
Quote from: Banners on 16 October, 2013, 04:36:51 PM
I just had to buy a Jonathan and Charlotte CD.

is that as in "Wow, this is so good I just HAD to buy it" or "I had to buy it if I know what's good for me"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 16 October, 2013, 04:50:04 PM
I am guessing the latter.

But cheer up Banners... it could have been SO much worse...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 October, 2013, 05:00:03 PM
It wasn't so much the buying of the CD I objected to (it's a birthday present for my Dad, whose awful taste only usually extends to the works of James Last, so this is some kind of improvement I guess).

Rather, the impediment was that I then felt compelled to watch some of Jonathan and Charlotte's performances on YouTube.

A little bit of me died.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 16 October, 2013, 05:04:41 PM
Quote from: IAMTHESYSTEM on 12 October, 2013, 11:43:46 AM
Quote from: Temponaut on 12 October, 2013, 10:13:19 AM
Those in charge would like to continue to guess rather than use facts, because facts make them look bad.  Guessing may be ridiculous, but a change would bring this to peoples attention.

All power structures maintain the status quo they manage because their system has developed enough for them to control it. Management tend to be on a higher pay grade or have higher status than subordinates and this status and the resulting  privileges that go with it might come into question if accurate numbers reveal that there are too many Chiefs and not enough Indians. Great way to make yourself 'surplus to requirements.' So though Companies love to claim they like to hear new ideas they realize soon enough  that this might upset the current hierarchy; the one they are usually benefitting from and therefore new ideas are always entertained -and then judiciously ignored.

Quoted for truth.
I often have dream of being able to quit my job at Bullshit central, but i guess its the same all over.  :(
If you have a job thats a joy, then i truly envy you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 16 October, 2013, 05:12:07 PM
Quote from: Banners on 16 October, 2013, 05:00:03 PM
It wasn't so much the buying of the CD I objected to (it's a birthday present for my Dad, whose awful taste only usually extends to the works of James Last, so this is some kind of improvement I guess).

Rather, the impediment was that I then felt compelled to watch some of Jonathan and Charlotte's performances on YouTube.

A little bit of me died.

AGGGHHHH NO NOT JAMES LAST!


I bought a second hand game from E Bay. installed disc one aok, BUT there should be TWO discs.. and only one was in the box.

A complaint has been filled.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Simon Beigh on 16 October, 2013, 06:13:48 PM
Been saving to go to Florida for the last 14 months. Two days until we fly, and I have a cold. This isn't a little sniffle, it's a proper 'I'm typing this from my bed' cold. And I need to visit Smiths for my Meg tomorrow... And clear my desk at work because I have a new job to come back to (which is a good job!). And pack...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 16 October, 2013, 09:10:47 PM
Ah man, thats crap.
Isnt it just typical that the cold should strike now. But dose yersen up, and im sure the hols will go fine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 16 October, 2013, 09:14:32 PM
Quote from: SimeonB on 16 October, 2013, 06:13:48 PM
Been saving to go to Florida for the last 14 months. Two days until we fly, and I have a cold. This isn't a little sniffle, it's a proper 'I'm typing this from my bed' cold. And I need to visit Smiths for my Meg tomorrow... And clear my desk at work because I have a new job to come back to (which is a good job!). And pack...

Are you hitting Miami? If not, still going to Florida you jammy sod...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: vzzbux on 21 October, 2013, 12:36:55 AM
Wankers at FP.
Went to collect my IDW's and they didn't place Mars Attacks v Dredd in my standing order even though I pre ordered it.
Now I am going to have to find issue one as they don't have one in stock.
Pricks.



V
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 October, 2013, 01:16:29 AM
Yay.  Despite not partaking of the whacky baccy in years, thanks to the neighbour in the downstairs flat I opened the laundry cupboard and found that every single item of what I thought was clean linen - including clothes, towels, bedsheets - stank to high heaven of cheap, nasty skunk to the point I had to put everything I own through the wash, and moving the clothes on the bottom of the pile has somehow allowed the unfiltered, rancid stench of it free access to the rest of my gaffe.
If you see some news tomorrow about an Irishman stabbing his downstairs neighbour in his stupid alky throat, I REGRET NOTHING.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 21 October, 2013, 04:18:56 AM
Wouldn't it be better if you just made a little anonymous phone call...?

Or fight back with a bigger, nastier stink...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 21 October, 2013, 08:04:36 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 21 October, 2013, 12:36:55 AM
Wankers at FP.
Went to collect my IDW's and they didn't place Mars Attacks v Dredd in my standing order even though I pre ordered it.
Now I am going to have to find issue one as they don't have one in stock.
Pricks.

Dispoable Heroes have standard and sub variant (http://www.disposableheroes.co.uk/index.php?searchStr=dredd+mars&act=viewCat&Submit=Go) still in stock

Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 21 October, 2013, 01:16:29 AM
Yay.  Despite not partaking of the whacky baccy in years, thanks to the neighbour in the downstairs flat I opened the laundry cupboard and found that every single item of what I thought was clean linen - including clothes, towels, bedsheets - stank to high heaven of cheap, nasty skunk to the point I had to put everything I own through the wash, and moving the clothes on the bottom of the pile has somehow allowed the unfiltered, rancid stench of it free access to the rest of my gaffe.
If you see some news tomorrow about an Irishman stabbing his downstairs neighbour in his stupid alky throat, I REGRET NOTHING.

On the positive side it could be a much worse smell that a bit weed  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2013, 11:42:46 AM
My PC blew up.

There was a flash from inside the casing, all the plug sockets in the flat tripped off and there was a smell of burning dust and plastic.

I'll have a look tonight, but I'm absolutely clueless about these things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 October, 2013, 12:19:53 PM
By that description DDD, it is to put it colloquially, quite fucked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 October, 2013, 12:26:24 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2013, 11:42:46 AM
There was a flash from inside the casing, all the plug sockets in the flat tripped off and there was a smell of burning dust and plastic.

From bitter experience, sounds like your power block has gone (the bit that transforms and routes the power from the mains into all the little cables for each bit of your machine).  Bit of a pain in the arse to replace whatever your make and model, but your HDD will most likely be okay so don't despair, and RAM should still be salvagable should you decide to move on rather than repair.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 October, 2013, 01:16:05 PM
Don't give up on it just yet, DDD.  I bought a new pc recently that gave me an electric shock and melted some wires coming off the power block the first time I turned it on, and it still booted up once or twice before the pc store insisted I needed to send it back to them anyway.  I did so and it came back with a new power block, working just fine apart from the fact they'd installed Windows 7 in the fucking thing to run diagnostics despite me buying it in the first place because I wanted to install a linux OS.  Spent 8 hours yesterday fruitlessly trying to get theg raphics tablet working on the bastard thing, so that was 400 nicker well spent.

Windows 7 is shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 October, 2013, 01:23:23 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 21 October, 2013, 01:16:05 PM
Windows 7 is shit.

Don't be stupid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 01:25:51 PM
Been stuck in virtually stationary traffic on the M62 for over an hour in the pissing rain. The door rubber has picked today to perish so it's also raining in all over my right leg. Bloody bugger.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2013, 01:41:19 PM
sorry to hear of your soggy leg sharky - the M62 is ALWAYS clogged, I think radio 2 announcers just add "very busy on the M62" to every traffic forecast in the knowledge that they'll usually be right.  I was rather damp and 45 minutes late to work today as the trams were knackered again. *sigh*

Thanks for all the advice on my PC woes - I think it was the power block thingy - I took the side off and that seems to be roughly where the flash had been spotted, and the block was very very hot. I'll see if it's dead or just wounded tonight, and if nothing happens I'll see about replacing that bit first. It's been crashing a lot lately, which may be a precursor to it's final suicide.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 October, 2013, 01:43:57 PM
Something similar happened to me. I was worried but it was just the fan which had seized - it was about £30 to fix. Hopefully it's not as bad as you fear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 01:47:55 PM
Been stuck in virtually stationary traffic on the M62 for over an hour in the pissing rain. The door rubber has picked today to perish so it's also raining in all over my right leg. Bloody bugger.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 01:53:27 PM
And now my 'phone's acting up too - bloody bloody double bugger.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 October, 2013, 02:07:40 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 01:25:51 PM
Been stuck in virtually stationary traffic on the M62 for over an hour in the pissing rain.

Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 01:47:55 PM
Been stuck in virtually stationary traffic on the M62 for over an hour in the pissing rain.

WARNING: do not pick up any hungry-looking younger hitch-hiking versions of yourself.  But do check the back seat for mountains of cash.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 October, 2013, 02:43:23 PM
Quote from: Banners on 21 October, 2013, 01:23:23 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 21 October, 2013, 01:16:05 PM
Windows 7 is shit.

Don't be stupid.

I know what you are but what am I?  I have had a W7 pc for less than a month and the number of bluescreen crashes now has a 2 at the start of it.  Shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 October, 2013, 02:55:59 PM
Quote from: Professor James T Bear on 21 October, 2013, 02:43:23 PM
I have had a W7 pc for less than a month and the number of bluescreen crashes now has a 2 at the start of it.

Whereas I've run my current Windows 7 PC 16 hours a day for nearly three years and have had jut one BSOD (when the fan broke, see above). Assuming your Windows 7 installation is up-to-date, I suspect it's your hardware config rather than the OS causing the problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 October, 2013, 03:18:41 PM
By "hardware config", do you mean the four gb of ram Windows needs just to turn on?  One bluescreen was because I tried to play a dvd, but mostly it's because of a modem that has no compatibility problems with any other os, not even - God help us - Vista.*  This was once explained to me by a pc repairman as not being Microsoft or Windows' fault, it was, in fact, the fault of everyone else for not making their products work with versions of windows that did not yet exist, and that my problems might go away if my pc cost a thousand pounds more than it did.  He said this with a straight face and no malice and was by all other measures a helpful and nice man.



*I have also heard of many people who have never had a single problem with Vista, but then my dad knows a man whose parachute didn't open this one time and who is still alive.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 21 October, 2013, 03:55:13 PM
With Windows you get one crap version then one good version, which is just the previous version with everything that was wrong with it fixed. e.g. Windows 2000 sucked, Windows XP good. Vista sucked, Windows 7 good. Windows 8 sucks [worse than any Windows has ever sucked], so come back when Windows 9 has fixed all this shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 21 October, 2013, 04:00:59 PM
Microsoft tends to have a break and release policy.

1st. Break all existing compatibilities.
2nd. Release to public.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 October, 2013, 04:29:09 PM
You forgot step 0.5: copy other people's ideas but charge more.
Also step 3: steal Bear's money and refuse to give it back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 04:51:57 PM
So, so far today I've been stuck in stationary traffic three times - once due to some maniac farmer dropping a haystack all over th M62 at Goole, once due to some maniac low-loader driver dropping a HUGE drum of pylon cable on the M62 at Brighouse and lastly due to some maniac car driver setting fire to his Fiat Cindero on the M61 at Chorley. Finally got back to base nearly 4 hours late only to discover that one of my pallets of mixed peppers had collapswd en-route, treating me to a colourful avalanche upon opening the back doors.

All sorted now, though so all that remains is the 33 minute walk home.

In the rain.

Now that, my friends, is a proper procession of minor impediments!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 05:43:53 PM
Dammit - and now I've broken a tooth.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 October, 2013, 06:15:30 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 05:43:53 PM
Dammit - and now I've broken a tooth.

Well stop filing them then.

As I understand it your kind have multiple rows of the things, so the one behind will move forward if you just yank the broken one out.   

More seriously, ouch and bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2013, 06:30:25 PM
If I don't file them people think I'm a hat stand...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 22 October, 2013, 09:35:30 AM
Last night I put on a DVD from an Inspector Morse box set that I borrowed from the library. I made sure to clean off the disc first - as previous borrowers have a tendency to leave sticky thumb prints etc - and settled down for a relaxed evening in with one of my favourite Detectives.

Six minutes into the episode, and the damn disc started to freeze then skip, freeze then skip, and on it went for at least the next ten minutes. I got so irritated at not being able to follow the story that I gave up trying and went grumpily to bed instead.

Ironically enough, the offending episode on the disc was entitled: "Driven to Distraction"...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 October, 2013, 09:47:17 AM
I've given up taking DVDs and CDs out of the library.  It's too frustrating.  I wish that other media made use of the same robust filth-proof design that Nintendo DS cartridges do - my kids have borrowed pretty much every DS game the library has, and there's never been an issue, whereas I don't think we've ever got to the end of a disc without incident. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 October, 2013, 11:42:40 AM
"Borrowed"? What about the impoverished game companies' lost rental revenues?! You ought to be ashamed, sabotaging the economy like that...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 October, 2013, 01:48:53 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 October, 2013, 11:42:40 AM
"Borrowed"? What about the impoverished game companies' lost rental revenues?! You ought to be ashamed, sabotaging the economy like that...

Fightin' the power, one Zelda game at a time.

In other news, just broke my favourite drill bit.  Now I know why it is you humans cry. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 October, 2013, 01:19:43 PM
Well, this particular human is crying because its dentist can't see it until November the 13th, by which time its head will probably be nothing more than a large ball of crusty pus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 23 October, 2013, 01:56:09 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 October, 2013, 01:19:43 PM
Well, this particular human is crying because its dentist can't see it until November the 13th, by which time its head will probably be nothing more than a large ball of crusty pus.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZfpJD4nMnk

WARNING! Video WILL induce great vomiting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 23 October, 2013, 02:15:43 PM
1) I'm no longer on Disability Living Allowance but Jobseekers instead. According to the bloody Tribunal, there's "plenty of jobs available"!!!! WHERE?????

2) My Meg subscription is not arriving!!!

3) I've lost my PS VITA!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 23 October, 2013, 05:01:52 PM
HAve you tried down the back of the sofa/ fridge....?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 23 October, 2013, 05:30:07 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 October, 2013, 01:19:43 PM
Well, this particular human is crying because its dentist can't see it until November the 13th, by which time its head will probably be nothing more than a large ball of crusty pus.

Have you never read Button Man III!?  You know what you have to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 23 October, 2013, 05:58:05 PM
I opened a tin of sardines at my desk (again) which sprang open and sprayed fishy tomato sauce over my keyboard, paperwork and me (again).  The pregnant woman with a heightened sense if smell sat next to me nearly puked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 23 October, 2013, 08:07:34 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 22 October, 2013, 09:35:30 AM
Ironically enough, the offending episode on the disc was entitled: "Driven to Distraction"...

In a similar vein, it was GREMLINS that got jammed in the DVD player of a friend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dunk! on 29 October, 2013, 08:38:44 PM
I hate drawing Johnny Alpha's costume*.

It's such a fiddly fucker.

So there.

Dunk!


*The jacket combo first seen in Incident on Mayger Minor
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 29 October, 2013, 10:46:47 PM
I was persuaded to see an outdoor fire extravaganza version of The Tempest in the Brecon Beacons tonight.  I couldn't see anything, there was bugger all fire, and I nearly froze to death. It was a real endurance test!!!

No wonder the SAS keep dying on training exercises there. Mind you, I wasn't sure what was going to get me first, the hypothermia, or the mind numbing boredom.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 29 October, 2013, 11:22:49 PM
I think it may be non badged squaddies that die, more than actual members of the SAS.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 30 October, 2013, 12:09:49 AM
My neighbour downstairs got a puppy and locks it into a room when he leaves the flat for work.  And when he leaves the flat for the pub.  And when he stays in the flat but is in another room.  As a result, the puppy has whined constantly - night and day - for the last three weeks, turning from a high-pitched and unmistakeably youthful "yip-yip" attempt at a bark interspersed with the odd whine to a sort of bark/crying hybrid noise and now finally in this last week to the loneliest sound I have ever heard, almost like a wail occasionally interrupted by a hiccup.  Even at night I hear its crying, and was woken at five in the morning by its scratching at the door/floor/wall - I presume trying to escape or just find companionship.

Apparantly my neighbour is the assistant dog warden for the town - the guy you call when concerned about dogs.  Funny old world.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 30 October, 2013, 02:23:19 AM
Liberate the puppy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 30 October, 2013, 02:35:08 AM
Contact the RSPCA!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 October, 2013, 07:38:44 AM
Yeah, you gotta' do something, man. Dogs live and breathe to socialise - locking them away like that is just abuse, plain and dirty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 October, 2013, 08:19:30 AM
Seeing as he works with animals, is it remotely possible that he's just fostering the puppy while it's in quarantine for some reason?  We do that for dogs and cats when there's no isolation kennels left in the local shelter, and it can seem awful to keep them apart, but it's not for very long and the alternative is worse. 

Either way, I have the contact details for the Ulster SPCA sitting right here beside me if you'd like them.  Couldn't do any harm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 31 October, 2013, 05:58:53 PM
She's only gone and smashed my no longer available, barely ten month-old Dredd pint mug, hasn't she?

Fucksticks...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 31 October, 2013, 11:15:40 PM
I have to get up at 0530. That's quite early for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 01 November, 2013, 10:56:16 AM
My chair broke at work. Now sitting on a chair I had to pay for out of my own pocket and hope I get reimbursed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 November, 2013, 11:02:03 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 31 October, 2013, 11:15:40 PM
I have to get up at 0530. That's quite early for me.

Any earlier than that and it's reclassified as staying up late.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 01 November, 2013, 07:58:19 PM
Just out the door on the way to work this morning and a stray puppy runs up to me so it's a bad day for someone somewhere....I'll try and see if I can find the owner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 November, 2013, 03:14:23 PM
I'm having an argument with a musical venue on Twitter (because I'm that kind of wound-up internet twat) but genuinely I'm interested to know - why do moderate-sized corporate music venues have strict no re-entry rules?

It means joe chap can't go out and a swift cheap pint next door, or use a cash machine without paying their surcharge. But is that IT? Is there some sort of thing where they think "if they're going out and coming back in they must be smuggling drugs" - what's the logic beyond cash-grabbing?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 03 November, 2013, 03:26:50 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 November, 2013, 03:14:23 PM
I'm having an argument with a musical venue on Twitter (because I'm that kind of wound-up internet twat) but genuinely I'm interested to know - why do moderate-sized corporate music venues have strict no re-entry rules?

It means joe chap can't go out and a swift cheap pint next door, or use a cash machine without paying their surcharge. But is that IT? Is there some sort of thing where they think "if they're going out and coming back in they must be smuggling drugs" - what's the logic beyond cash-grabbing?

It's to do with trying to minimise hassle at the door. If you're going out and coming in again you should be counted out and then counted back in as you come and go, otherwise the venue will lose track of how many people are inside. They need to know how many are inside for insurance and fire reg purposes.
If you leave and come back again you should really have to queue again - you can't reserve your place in the venue and expect to come back later and walk straight in, otherwise the venue could be half empty while people are off drinking elsewhere.
From personal experience people don't get this. They think they've had to queue once so take exception to having to go to the back of a queue again, especially if it's at a 'one in, one out' capacity.
Easier to just say 'once you've left, you've left'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 November, 2013, 03:48:35 PM
Ah I see - well on this occasion, which was about twenty minutes before the main band started (I just wanted to nip out for cash) there wasn't a queue. That doesn't really happen halfway through gigs surely, all the people that want to be in are in, although with club nights I can see more logic in the policy.

Lesson learned with regards to the O2 chain anyway - if you want a drink do it beforehand or smuggle a hipflask in!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 03 November, 2013, 04:04:38 PM
Oh pairs of rancid wrinkled testicles! I think I am getting a cold... I only just got over one a fortnight ago. Not fair!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 03 November, 2013, 04:19:35 PM
At work all this weekend night shifts with a toothache which has prevented me from eating anything since breakfast yesterday (apart from 500mg Co-codamol), and with no emergancy dentist on call at the local hospital. Oh yeah and no sleep.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 03 November, 2013, 05:04:46 PM
Quote from: judda fett on 03 November, 2013, 04:19:35 PM
At work all this weekend night shifts with a toothache which has prevented me from eating anything since breakfast yesterday (apart from 500mg Co-codamol), and with no emergancy dentist on call at the local hospital. Oh yeah and no sleep.

Toothache really is the worst; hope it gets sorted soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 03 November, 2013, 06:10:17 PM
Cheers Sheldipez, I think its time for more painkillers. Hope I can get this sorted in the AM... :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 03 November, 2013, 09:36:55 PM
Last 2 job interviews I had, both told me I'd be looking at starting with 12hrs but they'd be bumped up in no time so I told them I'd be interested in that. Both told me I had been successful. When I ended up calling them a few weeks later to ask why I hadn't heard anything regarding a start date, both said no hours had came about so I'd have to wait until they did.
Applied for the Home Office through a temping agency. The agency was calling me a few times a week for a couple of weeks, saying they urgently needed me to come in with something or other to replace something (they'd previously said was good enough) else in my application pack- each call was supposedly on the last day my pack could be sent off. But anyway, after waiting more weeks, I finally got my email from the Home Office- the all important security questionnaire or whatever. To access this, I have to enter a security code. In all those times the temping agency had me rush in as well as in the guidance notes they gave me for this questionnaire, they never once told me about this security code or gave it to me!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 November, 2013, 01:44:50 PM
Gah.  Think I have just lost a decent little job because I don't have Public Liability insurance in place in advance of being awarded the contract.  I  can't afford to maintain PL when I have no bloody work (and thus am no danger to the public*), but obviously I include the cost of same in my tender so that I can get it to cover the gig.  Of course I am several days deep into the tortuous tender process before the local authority decide to mention this.

I NEED WORK MONEY.



*In theory.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 November, 2013, 11:56:28 AM
Hi Tordel,

If it's not too late, it might be worthwhile checking with your nearest Citizens Information office to see if they could point you in the right direction with regards to your Public Liability dilemma. I rang my nearest office to see if they had any info but apart from a very nice and helpful receptionist there was no one else to assist. She suggested going online to www.citizensinformation.ie to locate an office close to you. There might be grant-aid or some other funding solution available to sort your problem. Hope this is of some help anyway and best of luck.

All the best - Paddy Kafka
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 November, 2013, 07:09:21 PM
Cheers Paddy - believe it or not, I did eventually get it sorted in much the manner you describe.  You can get 50% of your PL insurance covered under a Technical Assistance Grant from the local SW office, provided you are an Enterprise-Allowance-approved start-up (which itself requires a minimum of 4 meetings, 6 forms and approval from 3 different bodies), and provided you submit three written quotations for said insurance to the SW office in advance, and provided you can find the 'Facilitator' responsible (mine seemed to have promptly escaped from her maximum-security cubicle and vanished into the Los Angeles underground), and provided they approve of the quote you favour, and provided you have the patience to go through all that... 

I do wish they wouldn't make qualifying for these things an endurance test of slogging between queues and appointments and unanswered voicemails and then more queues, but I am very pleasantly surprised that such a grant exists at all.

Still, after all that, it looks like I'm back in the running for the contract.  On my way back baby, oh yeah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 22 November, 2013, 09:44:13 AM
England collapsed in the cricket and look like they'll lose the first Test heavily unless something drastic happens. Or it rains for the next three days. Even worse than this is the fact that my Scottish friends have taken the chance to wind me up about this and my phone has been glowing hot with text messages since 7am this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 22 November, 2013, 11:27:15 AM

good luck with that TB, you must have the patience of a saint

Mr Zeal: hahhaha.

as for my woes, Minimini Huff managed to miss the last trainout of Weegieville after the Antigua Monkeys last night... lesson learnt I hope
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 22 November, 2013, 11:52:02 AM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 22 November, 2013, 11:27:15 AM
as for my woes, Minimini Huff managed to miss the last trainout of Weegieville after the Antigua Monkeys last night... lesson learnt I hope
Only if you insisted he sleep in the bus station because it's character building.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 November, 2013, 12:33:28 PM
God, eBay buyers are a shower of impatient twats aren't they.

Sold a load of stuff recently and am getting emails every day since asking if I have posted the items yet - one guy is emailing every 24 hours.

Refuse to reply to them. Get a life!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 22 November, 2013, 12:43:28 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 21 November, 2013, 07:09:21 PM

Still, after all that, it looks like I'm back in the running for the contract.  On my way back baby, oh yeah.

Glad to hear that, Tordel and fair play to you for your persistence. Hope it pays off!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 November, 2013, 01:00:34 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 22 November, 2013, 12:43:28 PMHope it pays off!

So do I!   :-\

Have to say, while all my current attempts at bootstrapping myself back into existence are frustrating, expensive and probably as ill-advised and poorly-timed as anything I've ever done (and that is one impressive list, believe me), it feels so good just to be doing something that seems like part of a potential future, rather than the dogend of past failures, that I'm really enjoying it.  Fool that I am.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 22 November, 2013, 02:07:56 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 22 November, 2013, 11:52:02 AM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 22 November, 2013, 11:27:15 AM
as for my woes, Minimini Huff managed to miss the last trainout of Weegieville after the Antigua Monkeys last night... lesson learnt I hope
Only if you insisted he sleep in the bus station because it's character building.

If it had been up to me that would have (had to have) been the solution...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 23 November, 2013, 05:22:49 PM
I have no money. Because I keep buying things. Every time I tell myself I will save money, something new and shiny comes along and demands that I buy it. And thanks to the internet I don't even need to leave the house to buy things. I mean, when you get an email saying "save 50% on all of this stuff but only today" you really don't have a choice.

I think the only way I can escape this is to become a monk. Or homeless.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 24 November, 2013, 02:01:17 AM
Following on from my message on Friday about the cricket things have got even worse for England. My minor impediment isn't about them but the fact that I'm sat watching them play at 2am when I should be in bed but yet I can't stop watching.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 November, 2013, 02:13:26 AM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 23 November, 2013, 05:22:49 PM
I have no money. Because I keep buying things.

But if you had money, you'd have no things.  Money is for buying things.  It's all just a matter of timing, and who the things are for.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 25 November, 2013, 12:29:06 PM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 23 November, 2013, 05:22:49 PM
I have no money. Because I keep buying things. Every time I tell myself I will save money, something new and shiny comes along and demands that I buy it. And thanks to the internet I don't even need to leave the house to buy things. I mean, when you get an email saying "save 50% on all of this stuff but only today" you really don't have a choice.

I think the only way I can escape this is to become a monk. Or homeless.

or don't go online?   :D or do what I do and ebay all the crap collectibles from the back of the cupboard/old boxes...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 03 December, 2013, 05:40:36 PM
Because I've been running round all day trying to get my christmas cards printed and been defeated at every single turn.

After the stuff I ordered online turned out to be unsuitable (too thick), I finally got the correct type of paper I needed (after traipsing round various shops etc) then I finally get to the library to begin photocopying them, only for a member of staff (who absolutely reeked of skunk-weed btw) told me I wasn't allowed to run my own paper through the machine as it couldn't take anything heavier than 80gsm - this is despite me having done the exact same thing multiple times before, and the photocopier explicitly having a setting for 100gsm+ heavyweight paper. But there was no arguing with him. So now I'm stuck with loads and loads of useless card and a design that took me ages to think up and draw that will no longer work as it relied on being photocopied.

So, so frustrating when something that's supposed to be fun ends up becoming a (expensive) time-consuming nightmare.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 03 December, 2013, 05:45:44 PM
Could you not find a print shop nearby and ask them to do it using your materials at a wee discount?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 03 December, 2013, 05:53:42 PM
Yeah looks like my only option now, but I've had terrible experiences with those places in the past - the last time I went to one ended with the employee chasing me down the street shouting abuse at me (I stormed out as he was being incredibly patronising, unhelpful and rude).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 04 December, 2013, 05:30:55 PM
Accidentally ended up reading some old posts from over 10 years ago.

I'm sure that at the time, you lot all knew I was posting like a prick but I've only just realised now. Hopefully I don't post like that any more. Apologies to all involved.

Cripes, I hope in ten years time I don't look at my current posts and feel the same (the thought that I've become nicer, notwithstanding).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 06 December, 2013, 11:30:22 AM
Cricket. Sigh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 06 December, 2013, 05:13:39 PM
I got up at my usual time to be in work for 8am. I forgot I wasn't supposed to start today until 9am. I did myself out of an extra hour in bed. AAAARGH!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 07 December, 2013, 02:56:10 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 04 December, 2013, 05:30:55 PM
Accidentally ended up reading some old posts from over 10 years ago.

I'm sure that at the time, you lot all knew I was posting like a prick but I've only just realised now. Hopefully I don't post like that any more. Apologies to all involved.

Cripes, I hope in ten years time I don't look at my current posts and feel the same (the thought that I've become nicer, notwithstanding).

All hail me.  :-X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 07 December, 2013, 03:42:51 PM
Quote from: radiator on 03 December, 2013, 05:40:36 PM
Because I've been running round all day trying to get my christmas cards printed and been defeated at every single turn.

After the stuff I ordered online turned out to be unsuitable (too thick), I finally got the correct type of paper I needed (after traipsing round various shops etc) then I finally get to the library to begin photocopying them, only for a member of staff (who absolutely reeked of skunk-weed btw) told me I wasn't allowed to run my own paper through the machine as it couldn't take anything heavier than 80gsm - this is despite me having done the exact same thing multiple times before, and the photocopier explicitly having a setting for 100gsm+ heavyweight paper. But there was no arguing with him. So now I'm stuck with loads and loads of useless card and a design that took me ages to think up and draw that will no longer work as it relied on being photocopied.

So, so frustrating when something that's supposed to be fun ends up becoming a (expensive) time-consuming nightmare.

Ah well as my previous complaints here have shown... Liberians and common sense are mutually incompatible.

Although I would never dare to use my own paper in their copiers.... Obvious that it wouldn't be allowed.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 07 December, 2013, 03:58:16 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 04 December, 2013, 05:30:55 PM
Accidentally ended up reading some old posts from over 10 years ago.

I'm sure that at the time, you lot all knew I was posting like a prick but I've only just realised now. Hopefully I don't post like that any more. Apologies to all involved.

Cripes, I hope in ten years time I don't look at my current posts and feel the same (the thought that I've become nicer, notwithstanding).

Examples man examples!!  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 December, 2013, 03:59:26 PM
Quote from: The Doctor Alt 8 on 07 December, 2013, 03:42:51 PMLiberians and common sense are mutually incompatible.

Stop with your xenophobic rants!   ;)

Accepting that was a typo, I can only deduce that you've been reading Colin's shelving thread, and agree.

More seriously, a concern over the weight of paper in a printer is hardly unreasonable. I feel Radiator's frustration keenly, but I'd probably err on the side of caution myself, having spent one too many evenings up to the elbows Herriot-fashion in the guts of an office printer.  Trying to re-align rollers by touch might be Lobster Random's idea of fun, but it ain't mine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 08 December, 2013, 01:00:57 AM
It's 26 degrees today. So I have to decide between spending the day in my underpants, or having the doors open. And no, you can't have both. Tried it once. I went past the front door and there were some kids selling chocolate for a school fundraiser.

Not a good thing for anyone involved.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 December, 2013, 08:26:05 AM
Despite us having a kid free weekend next week, my wife has inexplicably decided to start the pre-Christmas toy cull this weekend with them still in the house.

I'm staying up here in my man cave, it's like world war 3 down there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 December, 2013, 09:30:24 AM
Going in for my 'interview' as part of the process so I can claim jonseekers while I volunteer and look for a proper job. Not looking forward to having to sit amongst the Kylelites but it must be done. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 10:14:55 AM
Here's a First World problem if ever there was one: every year on this specific day my wife's entire family gets on the phone in sequence and demands to know what the kids want for Christmas, which is of course very nice of them. 

Every year I outline their interests, and the kinds of things they might appreciate in that area (e.g. my son really loves sea swimming, but hasn't really got any gear; my daughter loves Lego, especially the stuff with animals etc. etc.).  This is never enough.  Ten minutes later they'll be back on the phone, wanting to know something specific, and where to get it.  Fine, I wrack my brains, flick through the Argos catalogue, come up with something specific for everyone from everyone. An hour later they've found the item, and they either don't like it and/or it's too expensive, can I tell them something else?  I suggest something generic instead, a set of markers, an annual or a jigsaw maybe?  No, no they still want to know something specific and they have to know now, because this is the only day they'll be shopping. 

The usual resolution is that I agree to buy something myself to an agreed budget and drop it over to them, which I suspect was the plan all along.

What I actually want to do is say: "maybe if you spent any time at all with the kids you'd be able to work some of this crap out for yourselves". 

It's not a bloody Wedding Gift list.  As if the kids care what they get anyway - they're little kids, they just like getting presents.  I've seen them wrapped up for hours on end with a roll of wallpaper and a box of crayons: which precise fecking version of Tinkerbell to get for under 15 euro just doesn't come into it.  What they'd really like is for you to get them a game or toy and play with it with them.

I know, I know, I should be grateful that they care.  I just have problems equating shopping with caring.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 08 December, 2013, 10:48:30 AM
We have similar problems with our families so the past couple of years we did out kids an Amazon wishlist each and we just direct people there if they can't sort it out for themselves.

It can cause issues with the eldsters but it stops most of the family badgering us for ideas and means that we can prevent my Mother In Law buying the hugest thing in the shop and us struggling to find space for it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 11:29:41 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 08 December, 2013, 10:48:30 AM
We have similar problems with our families so the past couple of years we did out kids an Amazon wishlist each and we just direct people there if they can't sort it out for themselves.

Why the bloody hell didn't I think of that.  I mean, the thought turns my stomach ('here's what you should buy for little Tarquin in the 20-30 euro range'), but it would make life so much easier.  Next year.

The bit that really annoys is that I genuinely believe that the thing the kids would most like from their grandparents, uncles and aunts would be to be taken out for a kickabout, a game of snakes and ladders, or a co-op on the Wii, none of which ever happens. 

Thankfully my own brothers and their wives are a lot more switched on, despite hardly ever being in the country.  One of the best Christmas Days we ever had was in the snow a few years back when my brother brought over a plastic sled and spent hours bombing around the estate with the kids until long after dark.  This we all remember, what presents he brought the kids is long forgotten. 

Similarly my Ozzer brother's wife was in hospital with complications leading up to the birth their second baby last Christmas, and they were understandably distracted, but to our amazement a bizarre sequence of presents from them arrived in Amazon boxes day after day for about a week.  On enquiring as to what was going on, it transpired that my brother had been put in charge of organising presents to both families, predictably left it far too late for postage, and decided the internet was the only way to go, but then couldn't keep track of what he'd ordered for who or whether he had at all, so just kept sending present after present until he was sure everyone had got something. It was a rather awesome recovery, but gods know what it cost him.

Christmas is supposed to be fun, and about people, not bloody catalogues.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 08 December, 2013, 02:24:52 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 11:29:41 AM
at the thing the kids would most like from their grandparents, uncles and aunts would be to be taken out for a kickabout, a game of snakes and ladders, or a co-op on the Wii, none of which ever happens. 

That just sounds utterly mental to me. My first lil' nephew was born last November, and I absolutely cannot wait to take him on days out, treat him to stuff or just muck about in a park with a football, any chance I get. I can't understand who on earth would try to avoid things like that, or why...?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 08 December, 2013, 02:30:38 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 08 December, 2013, 02:24:52 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 11:29:41 AM
at the thing the kids would most like from their grandparents, uncles and aunts would be to be taken out for a kickabout, a game of snakes and ladders, or a co-op on the Wii, none of which ever happens. 

That just sounds utterly mental to me. My first lil' nephew was born last November, and I absolutely cannot wait to take him on days out, treat him to stuff or just muck about in a park with a football, any chance I get. I can't understand who on earth would try to avoid things like that, or why...?

My parents haven't seen my kids for several years. Some people just have no interest in these things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 02:43:13 PM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 08 December, 2013, 02:24:52 PMI can't understand who on earth would try to avoid things like that, or why...?

You obviously haven't met my kids!

Joke, joke, they're not (quite) that bad.  Yeah, it mystifies me: when they do get to see them, it's always 'be quiet; don't touch that' etc.  I often find myself thinking: 'how much longer do you think these klds are going to be interested in playing with you?'. I've already noticed that my 7 year-old prefers to play with his friends than with me when both options are available, which is healthy but also sad. 

Still, as Sheldipez notes, it could be worse: my best mate's in-laws never come near their kids, and hardly ever send presents or cards for birthdays or Christmas. If they want to drop round to them, they have to give a month's notice.

I only get to see my brother's Aussie kids for a few weeks every year or two, and their absence in my life literally wrecks my head. 

We're lucky in that my own side of the family, for all our many many many faults, are much more into spending time with and playing with the kids, but the whole situation does make my wife quite unhappy.  Although ultimately it's the relatives in question I feel sorry for.  Even if it's only getting lost in a long Lego session or a spot of rockpooling again, these experiences are not to be missed.

Anyway, as predicted the phonecalls started this morning, and followed the standard pattern, but with a new twist anticipated by Rog: all shopping this year is to be by internet, so this afternoon I have to send them links to appropriate pressies.  -sigh-
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 December, 2013, 02:57:46 PM
Wow. I never stopped to think that a tight knit family like mine might not be the norm. This thread went from amusing to sad in the space of a few posts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 08 December, 2013, 03:00:31 PM
That sounds like a nightmare, Tordels. I would turn my phone off.

Still, it's better than a certain elderly relative of mine casually asking what a child is getting for their birthday, then rushing out to buy it first so we had to come up with something different. Then trying the same trick again the following year. :lol:

And you're right that time together is more important. Even after a massive pre-emigration toy cull, my kids have more crap than they could ever hope to play with. Yet they're happiest just drawing a picture or running around with a bat and ball.

You should draw up a pledge system for next year. Get the rellies to sign up for a trip to the cinema or an hour of football, and wrap up the pledge with a choccy Santa. Or would that offend everyone?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 03:03:32 PM
Quote from: Trout}You should draw up a pledge system for next year. Get the rellies to sign up for a trip to the cinema or an hour of football, and wrap up the pledge with a choccy Santa. Or would that offend everyone?[/quote

Well yes, but that's no reason not to do it!  I think that's a quite brilliant idea and wish I'd thought of it- next year for sure.  As it stands I am mainly sending links to board-and-card games, as we will apparently now be spending Christmas evening with the in-laws, the kids love them and it'll give me reason to insist on interaction.  Always fancied trying Munchkin.

Quote from: Hawkmonger on 08 December, 2013, 02:57:46 PM
Wow. I never stopped to think that a tight knit family like mine might not be the norm. This thread went from amusing to sad in the space of a few posts.

That'd be my baleful influence again!

Cheer us up by explaining to me what a 'Kylelite' is Hawkmonger. I've already ruled it out as a South Park reference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 December, 2013, 03:09:16 PM
A potential Jeremy Kyle Show guest. A strange, alien race of creature indigenous to northern England and a habitual pest to the working population.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 03:12:54 PM
Gak, editing that post went to hell!  But you get the point.

Occurs to me that I have unintentionally misrepresented my father-in-law here.  He can be quite distant and slow to engage, but in several previous years he has put huge amounts of effort into hand-making pressies for the kids which were quite wonderful, and inspired me to do likewise. So it really isn't as bad as I make out, or at least the badness is a bit less general.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 08 December, 2013, 04:25:07 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 03:03:32 PMWell yes, but that's no reason not to do it!  I think that's a quite brilliant idea and wish I'd thought of it- next year for sure.  As it stands I am mainly sending links to board-and-card games...

Read as far as here, suspected where this was going....

Quote from: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 03:03:32 PM...Always fancied trying Munchkin.

and my hunch was right.  It's your own Christmas wish list you're sending them! :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 04:35:09 PM
Always!  It's the no. 1 reason to have kids.  The in-laws'd never find more than Monopoly left to themselves, but as they have abased themselves before the power of the interwebs I can con them into filling the games cupboard with something other than Hungry Hungry Hippos. They could have got away with HexBugs and Lego, but they chose this path.

In my defense, the Boy in particular really does love boardgames - he regularly murders us in Catan and Carcassonne (and going so far as to teach my 70-yr old mother to play both), never mind the rather good Lego Hogwarts game.  You've no idea how hard it has been to refuse his endless demands for a Warhammer starter set (he's too young and it's too expensive).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 December, 2013, 04:39:46 PM
No. Never. Games Workshop their prices are utterly criminal!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 04:47:37 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 08 December, 2013, 04:39:46 PM
No. Never. Games Workshop their prices are utterly criminal!

Well, I think their successful business model of well-located well-staffed shops mandates their insanely high prices, but I agree, it's a dark path to start down. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 08 December, 2013, 05:01:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 04:35:09 PM
Always!  It's the no. 1 reason to have kids.  The in-laws'd never find more than Monopoly left to themselves, but as they have abased themselves before the power of the interwebs I can con them into filling the games cupboard with something other than Hungry Hungry Hippos. They could have got away with HexBugs and Lego, but they chose this path.

In my defense, the Boy in particular really does love boardgames - he regularly murders us in Catan and Carcassonne (and going so far as to teach my 70-yr old mother to play both), never mind the rather good Lego Hogwarts game.  You've no idea how hard it has been to refuse his endless demands for a Warhammer starter set (he's too young and it's too expensive).

Haven't played Settlers of Catan but love Carcassonne - does your son trounce everyone with farmers?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 05:08:47 PM
No, sleepers farmers is the wife's default strategy.  We often get stuck in a farmer arms-race while my son focuses on almost imperceptible road-and-small-city building gains, with a sideline in cloisters.  Left to my own devices I'm a big city man myself, and if we're playing expansions I love cathedrals: killer points yield if you can pull it off.  Which I never can.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 08 December, 2013, 05:19:08 PM
I'm not going to ask about boardgames anymore because I'm derailing the thread. Though derailing it may be may be a minor impediment for the person whose thread this is - Bouwel, where are you gone?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 December, 2013, 05:29:55 PM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 08 December, 2013, 05:19:08 PM
I'm not going to ask about boardgames anymore because I'm derailing the thread. Though derailing it may be may be a minor impediment for the person whose thread this is - Bouwel, where are you gone?

What, getting beaten by a 7-yr old isn't a minor impediment?  And yeah, miss Bouwel's contributions.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 08 December, 2013, 08:24:32 PM
My PS4 is now officially dead ("No Video Signal"), with my hard earned Killzone data missing, presumed lost forever!!!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 08 December, 2013, 08:47:21 PM
Is it this problem BSC?

http://techland.time.com/2013/11/18/playstation-4-pulsing-blue-sony-has-a-guide-for-that/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 08 December, 2013, 09:12:55 PM
Yes!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 December, 2013, 05:07:23 AM
Finished work early, so I thought I can just about fit in The Arrow and Strike Back, before the family start to get up.
About 20 seconds into the first program and the cable box has decided to reboot. Now all I can see is 'Your Digital TV service will start shortly'. Aaaaaaargh >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 13 December, 2013, 12:22:44 PM
Got all my prezzies sorted within budget, and put aside a little spare cash for some boozy evenings with pals over the next fortnight...

...and then the car breaks down.


AAAAARGHGHGHGHGHH!!!!! >:(
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 13 December, 2013, 03:30:19 PM
Kinda pissed with Apple right now for ios7 essentially breaking my perfectly good iphone4. It's now really slow and sluggish to use, and for some reason the update has also apparently buggered the 'home' button - it now has mental lag, and pressing it also now goes to the app slide menu (like it should when you double-click) rather than the home screen 50 percent of the time. They REALLY should not have made this update available on iPhones older than 5.

Seriously Apple, I love ya, but get act together.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 December, 2013, 04:21:51 PM
Well I've been happily driving around with a drivers side window that doesn't shut for a few months now. It didn't bother me too much, as I only had to tape it up for long journeys (Steve Green will vouch for that  :lol: ) I was gonna just leave it like that for as long as I could but the other morning the bloody fan died as well, so due to it being winter I had to get it repaired asp. Even I can't see out of a frozen windscreen, so today it went in and I splashed the cash to get the window done as well, might as well I thought.

Well the car is on the road again and my wallet is lighter. Now you think that is bad enough but during this week we have been having a new shower put in and obviously that is eating money as well. That doesn't bother me much but I've been having 'luxurious' showers at work, as I hate having a bath, takes way too much time and time is a rare commodity!

I hate spending money on none Dredd stuff :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 December, 2013, 06:05:04 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 13 December, 2013, 12:22:44 PM
...and then the car breaks down.

Quote from: Commando Forces...the other morning the bloody fan died as well, so due to it being winter I had to get it repaired asp. Even I can't see out of a frozen windscreen, so today it went in and I splashed the cash to get the window done as well, might as well I thought.

Aaaaand this morning the gearbox on my wife's car gave up the ghost.  After nerve-wracking Christmas budgeting had just about worked out, we're now well and truly scuppered until January, and I'm left running the missus to and from work (no public transport) and the kids to and from school every bloody day leaving my own work time severely curtailed...

I should  be rightly annoyed, but honestly, the whole family plus dog crammed into my Fiesta chugging about the festively-lit city and environs twice a day every day singing along to Christmas FM - well, that sounds pretty damn nic e actually. :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 13 December, 2013, 07:05:13 PM
The temporary traffic lights which were put up three days ago at the busy junction on my way to work have just been removed.  In those three days, no road work was done.

I don't mean very little was done, or nothing of importance was done.

Literally, three days of congestion and not a single ounce of tarmac was shifted.  And now they've disappeared.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 14 December, 2013, 07:21:20 AM
Quote from: Temponaut on 13 December, 2013, 07:05:13 PM
The temporary traffic lights which were put up three days ago at the busy junction on my way to work have just been removed.  In those three days, no road work was done.

I don't mean very little was done, or nothing of importance was done.

Literally, three days of congestion and not a single ounce of tarmac was shifted.  And now they've disappeared.

That was just a trial run. The real thing will last for a lot longer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 14 December, 2013, 01:19:58 PM
So the bill for the car wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, which was nice.

But then I got a bill from SWALEC which said I owed them £135 more than expected!!!

So it's going to be thick jumpers and no heating for the next 3 months.  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 14 December, 2013, 05:50:02 PM
On the plus side, half a rawl plug and a bit of Sellotape saved me the cost of a heating engineer call-out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 14 December, 2013, 07:57:17 PM
On the subject of Christmas budgeting being derailed, I too thought I was done and dusted and still just about in the black, only to come home to my washing machine making threatening noises this afternoon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 14 December, 2013, 11:08:50 PM
I am so hungover I can't go out drinking.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Emp on 16 December, 2013, 01:37:31 PM
Well after fracturing my knee I am now having to wear a brace for 8 weeks and not weight bear on my right leg.
Good point, no work for 8 weeks  :thumbsup:. Bad point no booze for 8 weeks :o

So, I'll either end up doing a lot of writing or end up with cabin fever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 16 December, 2013, 02:39:01 PM
That's terrible news Emp. Long lay ups are rough. Stick to the writing and don't spend to much time staring out of back windows at neighbours going ons. It'll make you mad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mabs on 16 December, 2013, 02:59:42 PM
My tooth cap came off over the weekend, now I got a gap in my upper teeth. Best not to smile eh?  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 December, 2013, 04:49:30 PM
Quote from: Mabs on 16 December, 2013, 02:59:42 PM
My tooth cap came off over the weekend, now I got a gap in my upper teeth. Best not to smile eh?  :-\

I've had a gappy tooth for months now. I had an implant that kept coming out - the dentist kept sticking it back in but the length of time before it came out again was diminishing each time. Eventually he drilled out the roots and I'm due to have a bridge made in January.

When my mum asked what I wanted for Christmas this year, as a joke I sang "all I want for Christmas is my two front teeth" - she took me literally and is giving me a cheque towards the cost of my bridge!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mabs on 16 December, 2013, 05:37:58 PM
Ah that's really sweet! Mums eh? I've had trouble with my teeth since a young age, they just seem to bloody break away, whether it is lack of vitamins or something I don't know. It's really quite irritating at times though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 18 December, 2013, 11:20:56 PM
Turns out, the guy i paid to install my bathroom decided to save a bit of time by not fixing the sink to the wall with the fixtures i provided.  Instead, he thought it would be a good idea to glue it to the painted wall tiles. 

Never glue heavy pieces of porcelain to paint.  Gloss just doesn't have the structural integrity you'd think it does.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 19 December, 2013, 09:09:36 PM
Quote from: Temponaut on 18 December, 2013, 11:20:56 PM
Turns out, the guy i paid to install my bathroom decided to save a bit of time by not fixing the sink to the wall with the fixtures i provided.  Instead, he thought it would be a good idea to glue it to the painted wall tiles. 

Never glue heavy pieces of porcelain to paint.  Gloss just doesn't have the structural integrity you'd think it does.

Damn Temponaut, that's some bad luck to be landed with a cowboy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 22 December, 2013, 10:05:33 AM
I'm in the dog house with her indoors accidentally teaching my 4 year old the "F" word.

I was playing Dishonored on my PC late last night, totally immersed with my headphones on and the lights off and the wife thought it would be a good idea to tap me on the shoulder as she passed my man-cave on the way to taking our youngest to the loo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 December, 2013, 03:57:27 PM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 19 December, 2013, 09:09:36 PM
Damn Temponaut, that's some bad luck to be landed with a cowboy

Aye, particularly when most of them are busy in Link Prime's kitchen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 December, 2013, 09:23:08 AM
About to head out for another blood pressure test - something I never perform very well in because I'm perpetually quite anxious. When I awoke today though I actually felt quite relaxed, quite positive, maybe this one wouldn't be so full-on...

Then - just fifteen minutes before leaving - the landlord family upstairs have broken into the most terrifying row I've ever heard. The children are screaming and weeping, I can hear glass breaking, the mother is screeching and screeching "I'll fucking kill you" and there is much to be profoundly, profoundly concerned about.

So, ahem. Not going to be 120 over 80 today I don't think :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 23 December, 2013, 10:18:50 AM
Sorry to hear that CFM, someone close to me has the exact same problem.

An obvious one I know- but go for a 30 min walk right before heading to the doctors.
It will reduce your blood pressure (and probably a bit of anxiety too).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 25 December, 2013, 02:14:43 PM
There are only three (small) bottles of beer in the fridge. This would certainly qualify as something more than a mini impediment but I think there's plenty of wine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 26 December, 2013, 09:07:34 AM
All day hangovers. That's Christmas for ya. I got some Thai for tea and went to pour myself a glass of milk and completely missed the glass. Went to pick up some rice with the fork and ended up with rice all over me. Still, it only happens once a year. Also, I am never eating chocolate ever again. I have consumed enough in the last 48 hours to last me a lifetime.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 December, 2013, 10:22:16 AM
not remotely hung over.  It being radiation month for the wife has led to a very quiet xmas.

starting to be allowed out form this Friday so time to enjoy Christmas then with a night out watching some folk and bluegrass stuff down west.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 02 January, 2014, 12:30:01 PM
My attempts to get Batman and Bruce Wayne into some internal communications were foiled by our IPR team in Legal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 02 January, 2014, 07:34:30 PM
Why does it take so long to upload a video to youtube?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 02 January, 2014, 07:46:42 PM
Got my pants on back to front.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 02 January, 2014, 09:26:22 PM
Someone got me some Star Wars boxers for Christmas. But they are a little too tight for everyday wear. They will come in handy for impressing a lady though. (So long as she doesn't question why I'm wearing Star Wars boxers)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 08 January, 2014, 02:29:44 PM
Pulled a white hair out of my eyebrows this morning. At this rate I'm going to look like Gandalf the White in a couple of years.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 January, 2014, 07:10:00 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 08 January, 2014, 02:29:44 PM
Pulled a white hair out of my eyebrows this morning. At this rate I'm going to look like Gandalf the White in a couple of years.

Many that stay dark deserve greyness. And some dye that deserve dark. Can Grecian 2000 give it to them?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 08 January, 2014, 07:32:08 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 08 January, 2014, 02:29:44 PM
Pulled a white hair out of my eyebrows this morning.

I remember when I found my first grey pube.





It was in a chicken burger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 08 January, 2014, 07:51:18 PM
Your becoming distinguished  when you have grey hair -not old.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 January, 2014, 07:53:34 PM
Quote from: Mister Pops on 08 January, 2014, 07:32:08 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 08 January, 2014, 02:29:44 PM
Pulled a white hair out of my eyebrows this morning.

I remember when I found my first grey pube.





It was in a chicken burger.

You sir owe me an Ipad. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 January, 2014, 02:15:19 PM
Cardiff Film & Comic Con sold out... looks like we'll be debuting our "early 2014" comic in May then. Hurrah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 10 January, 2014, 11:22:39 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 January, 2014, 07:10:00 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 08 January, 2014, 02:29:44 PM
Pulled a white hair out of my eyebrows this morning. At this rate I'm going to look like Gandalf the White in a couple of years.

Many that stay dark deserve greyness. And some dye that deserve dark. Can Grecian 2000 give it to them?

A former friend of mine - in what can only be described as a seriously misguided fit of vanity - once applied the aforementioned product to his pubic region. Needless to say this did not go well for him and, after three days of agonising pain in said area, he finally swallowed his pride and made his way to the local chemist in search of an antidote to his self-inflicted mishap. He told me afterwards, that it took the young lady behind the counter several minutes of convulsing laughter - most of it conducted at floor level - before she was in a fit enough state to serve him the appropriate medication to ease his discomfort.



Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 10 January, 2014, 12:12:55 PM
Yeah, right. "A friend".
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 January, 2014, 02:01:55 PM
Quote from: radiator on 10 January, 2014, 12:12:55 PM
Yeah, right. "A friend".

Aye, and for Grecian 2000 read: 'brake fluid'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 10 January, 2014, 06:17:08 PM
Yeah, yeah. You inserted a light bulb, didn't you Paddy?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 10 January, 2014, 09:09:27 PM
Feck. Sent to Southend for a week with work.

Still, downloading lots of progs and megs to keep me going.

So not all bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 January, 2014, 09:35:56 AM
I managed to step in dog crap last night and walk it through three rooms in the house before realising.

To make matters worse I am a typical bloke who only owns one pair of everyday footwear, so I have no choice but to stand gagging over the dustbin and run a twig around the tread to get it all out before I go out this morning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 11 January, 2014, 10:48:05 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 January, 2014, 09:35:56 AM
I managed to step in dog crap last night and walk it through three rooms in the house before realising.

To make matters worse I am a typical bloke who only owns one pair of everyday footwear, so I have no choice but to stand gagging over the dustbin and run a twig around the tread to get it all out before I go out this morning.

I have a pair of emergency trainers for just such an occurrence!

For some reason my front gate attracts dog shit. I've stepped out to find up to five separate turds right outside my gate, while the rest of the street is clear. The neighbourhood dogs must have taken a dislike to me.  I now have a kids seaside spade handy to scoop the turds into the gutter after my kids simultaneously trampled three turds into their shoes, and then into the house.

Splott is known for the dog turd problem - they are EVERYWHERE!  Once I had to call the council to clear up Splott bridge - it was impassable due to dog turds spread over the pavement for a good ten feet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 January, 2014, 11:20:41 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 11 January, 2014, 10:48:05 AM
Splott is known for the dog turd problem - they are EVERYWHERE!  Once I had to call the council to clear up Splott bridge - it was impassable due to dog turds spread over the pavement for a good ten feet.

That's onomatopoeiac determinism for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 11 January, 2014, 11:52:11 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 11 January, 2014, 11:20:41 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 11 January, 2014, 10:48:05 AM
Splott is known for the dog turd problem - they are EVERYWHERE!  Once I had to call the council to clear up Splott bridge - it was impassable due to dog turds spread over the pavement for a good ten feet.

That's onomatopoeiac determinism for you.

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 11 January, 2014, 12:25:07 PM
There was a drive to encourage the rather middle-class pronunciation of Splott as 'Spleww'.  I'm not 100% sure if that was tongue-in-cheek or not, as spew nearly rivals dogshit in the area.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 11 January, 2014, 03:17:13 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 11 January, 2014, 11:20:41 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 11 January, 2014, 10:48:05 AM
Splott is known for the dog turd problem - they are EVERYWHERE!  Once I had to call the council to clear up Splott bridge - it was impassable due to dog turds spread over the pavement for a good ten feet.

That's onomatopoeiac determinism for you.

Choking with laughter here.

One of the interesting things about Canada is you don't see dogshit on the streets. People simply don't tolerate it. Since arriving here 10 months ago, I've stood in some exactly once, and I think the reason it was left was the dog was ill. I won't say any more.

But it makes me wonder how much cleaner UK streets would be if the silent majority were less silent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 11 January, 2014, 05:50:14 PM
Gave my mobile number to three people this week. They both saw me latter and said it wasn't recognised. I phoned them and my mobile number is listed as something completely different to my SIM mobile number detailed in my phone. What the hell is going on or am i being tapped by some little Afghan man in a cave with a laptop?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 11 January, 2014, 05:51:25 PM
More like because it's buried in ten feet of snow Trouty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 11 January, 2014, 11:58:14 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 11 January, 2014, 05:51:25 PM
More like because it's buried in ten feet of snow Trouty.

There is a tradition of discovered turds when snow melts. :-)

But I was here during the summer and the streets are a lot cleaner than anywhere I lived in the UK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 12 January, 2014, 12:17:54 AM
Quote from: Ken Trousers on 11 January, 2014, 11:58:14 PM
But I was here during the summer and the streets are a lot cleaner than anywhere I lived in the UK.

An editorial in The Alloa Advertiser once opined that unless something was done to combat the county's endemic dog fouling problem the letter R in Clackmannanshire would have to be replaced with a T.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 12 January, 2014, 02:28:17 AM
Trousers = Trout ?

I approve. In a previous life I decided to name a new server at work 'trouser'. This proved moderately amusing for a while, and soon after I moved on. Onwards and upwards. Months later I was forwarded an internal email from a mate. From the network admin: 'Due to server maintenance there will be half an hour of trouser down-time this afternoon'. Nice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 12 January, 2014, 08:07:24 AM
Set my alarm an hour later than intended slept in anyway then inadvertently bought mango Fanta. The juice isn't bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 12 January, 2014, 01:47:50 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 12 January, 2014, 12:17:54 AM
An editorial in The Alloa Advertiser once opined that unless something was done to combat the county's endemic dog fouling problem the letter R in Clackmannanshire would have to be replaced with a T.

It's just as bad here in North Warwickshite, I live on the street that leads to the local park and woods so we get every dog walker in town passing by our door on their daily pilgrimage to take their mutt to drop it's fudge where the kids play.

I actually came up with an idea yesterday to take my mind away from my gag reflex while running a old screwdriver around the tread of my trainers, it involves a mandatory annual dog licence fee of £1000 which will in turn fund a compulsory doggie DNA database to cross reference trod-in turds against, a positive match will then remotely trigger an explosive dog collar and post out a Clarke's gift card to the victim.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 12 January, 2014, 03:29:41 PM
... because it's not nice to sense that you like someone a lot more than they like you and you sense a relationship might be slipping out of your fingers before it ever started. Although in this case that might be for the best but... well, if you really like someone you really like them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 12 January, 2014, 04:13:55 PM
Is there going to be another Cyberleader style agony aunt thread?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 12 January, 2014, 07:10:54 PM
Ha ha! I actually thought of that thread when I made the post.

Don't worry I'm definitely not going to be asking for advice. It's just been bothering me today and it felt therapeutic to get it out. I actually typed a lot more then thought... nah. Keep that private. Just typing it all out seemed to help a bit though, but no doubt it's purely psychological.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 12 January, 2014, 09:16:48 PM
I don't do good relationship advice so will go for the previous topic.

Inconsiderate dog owners = menace to society. Never understood why they don't put their mutts to do their daily duties off the edge of the kerb.

I named a road where I used to live until very recently as dog shit alley. Full of it and regularly right on the corner so tricky to avoid. I will be passing there later on tonight. I know now to walk in the road.

I once caught a dog owner putting his dog to pee on the outside wall of where I lived.
Me: Oy.
Dog owner: What?
Me: The dog.
Dog owner: What about it?
Me: It's pissing on my wall.
Dog owner: So?
Me: Take it to piss on your own wall.
Dog owner: I do?
Me: Well go and take it piss on your wall then [expletives deleted].

Years ago my brother told off a neighbour as her dog was pissing on my dad's car wheel. Her response: "Get your dad to clean it." Cue sweary response.

Oh, and my minor impediment, slightly related to the above.

Got the wrong train home from work on Friday. Wasted about 45mins. Got in thinking I won't dwell on that. Then found we had a blocked throne. I spent 8pm-1am solid trying to sort it. Then most of Saturday and half of Sunday! Now that was a waste of time. Unsolved so getting the pro's in which will cost a good hundred quid. A crap weekend in more ways than one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 13 January, 2014, 08:27:38 AM
The possibility of having to wait 2 more years for another season of Sherlock.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 13 January, 2014, 01:01:49 PM
That's because he's going to be busy studying and compiling 124 different types of dog turds, so as to identify and bring to justice their evil, inconsiderate owners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 January, 2014, 01:04:13 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 13 January, 2014, 01:01:49 PM
That's because he's going to be busy studying and compiling 124 different types of dog turds, so as to identify and bring to justice their evil, inconsiderate owners.

Non-existant Like button being repeatedly pressed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 13 January, 2014, 01:07:56 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 13 January, 2014, 01:01:49 PM
That's because he's going to be busy studying and compiling 124 different types of dog turds, so as to identify and bring to justice their evil, inconsiderate owners.
You just won the thread. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 13 January, 2014, 05:03:14 PM

So what dose he win?
A gold platted dog turd on a plinth?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 January, 2014, 05:13:37 PM
No wish to get into specifics, just venting at the ether so I don't scream at my nearest and dearest, but for fucks' sakes are some people really just born to fuck everything up for everyone else in pursuit of their own irresponsible goals?  I can understand making the odd ignorant mistake, who knows more about that than me, but again and again and again and always in your own interests...  you'd have to suspect a malicious sense of entitlement somewhere.   Not to generalise or anything, but the Dublin 'professional classes' - fucking self-serving bastards. 

Ah, that does feel better!   :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 January, 2014, 11:07:42 AM
Was cycling home last night from the gym and was clipped by a speeding car. I landed on my feet but I cracked my mouth on my handle bars, breaking the crown of my two top incisors and one of my lower ones. As im a student i'll be paying less for the treatment but it's still gonna cost a pretty penny. No comics for me for a month.  :|

And yes, it hurts like a bitch. Got a feeling the speeder was Jonathan Ross after he saw my comment in the other thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 21 January, 2014, 02:02:30 PM
Fuck Hawk that's shite news. Now I feel bad about griping about having to come to work while fighting a stomach flu.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 21 January, 2014, 02:06:14 PM
That's a bad day there hawk!
But at least your able to tell share, could have been so much worse
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 January, 2014, 04:31:40 PM
Ouch Hawk, having performed a similar cycling stunt with my front teeth some years back I can confirm that It's no fun at all.  But as already said, thank Grud you're here to tell the tale.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 January, 2014, 05:52:18 PM
That's a sickener and no mistake, HM, but if you want a tale to put your toothy business in perspective: one of my brothers just had surgery.
On his dick.

All very routine, apparantly, but he can barely walk now and described the visual "as if someone had stitched up that cut you see down the length of a hot dog with a shoelace."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 January, 2014, 07:44:33 PM
I crossed my legs for a moment. Then a wind caught my teeth and cried out in pain. Your brothers pain is with me in spirit. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 22 January, 2014, 02:06:43 PM
Bloody hell!!! That is frightening mental picture........ :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 January, 2014, 03:17:57 PM
Oh what a joy eBay buyers are.

If I didn't list the item as 'available for collection' then it's not 'available for collection' and will be posted. And don't f**king argue back, you cheeky git. You're in the wrong here, not me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 22 January, 2014, 03:25:03 PM
Quote from: radiator on 22 January, 2014, 03:17:57 PM
Oh what a joy eBay buyers are.

If I didn't list the item as 'available for collection' then it's not 'available for collection' and will be posted. And don't f**king argue back, you cheeky git. You're in the wrong here, not me.

HA! I hate ebay.

Second only to "thats a bit much for postage isn't it?" well yes it is but A) that's how much royal mail charge and B) shouldn't you thought of that before bidding?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 22 January, 2014, 07:08:12 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 21 January, 2014, 11:07:42 AM
Was cycling home last night from the gym and was clipped by a speeding car. I landed on my feet but I cracked my mouth on my handle bars, breaking the crown of my two top incisors and one of my lower ones. As im a student i'll be paying less for the treatment but it's still gonna cost a pretty penny. No comics for me for a month.  :|

And yes, it hurts like a bitch. Got a feeling the speeder was Jonathan Ross after he saw my comment in the other thread.

How're the teeth today Hawkmonger?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 22 January, 2014, 07:39:24 PM
Like somebody opened a cut and sucked all the moisture out. There no nerve endings left to feel pain and as it is it just feels like I have three pieces of broken crunchy bars stuck in my gums. Seeing the dentist for an evaluation in the morning so hopefully I can get someting in the mean time if pain flares up again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 22 January, 2014, 11:01:43 PM
Hope all goes well at the dentist, Hawkmonger.

Some of you guys are braver than me. Wouldn't catch me on two wheels. Last bike I had was my Chopper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 23 January, 2014, 10:44:14 AM
The bloke who used to hold my position in the community centre in which I work, had a very unfortunate tooth experience.

He was alone one day in the centre, standing on a chair attempting to fix a dodgy blind on one of the windows, which is very high up. The chair itself he had placed on a bench beneath the window so that he could reach up to the blind. However, through accident or carelessness on his part, the chair gave way as he was stretching up to fix the malfunctioning blind.

As if falling over ten feet to the ground wasn't bad enough, while en route to terra firma he caught his chin on the ledge beneath the window. This jarring impact caused two of his lower front teeth to burst through his upper lip which, needless to say, was a rather bloody and painful experience for him. In a state of extreme trauma and panic he rang my - now sadly deceased - former gaffer for assistance. (Quite how he managed this in his mangled state I'll never know!). The boss duly arrived, administered what first aid he could and called an ambulance.

While they were waiting, he turned to the hapless - and now partially toothless - caretaker and, in his own dry, inimitable fashion said to him: "Ya fuckin' eejit".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 30 January, 2014, 09:36:25 PM
A man (who looked strangely like Allan Moore) came into the British Heart Foundation today and left a bag of items to be donated. I left them in the back to be checked when the managers asked to look in the bag minuets latter. The nutter had donated a large collection of USED sex toys! Mostly made of dildoes and variously sized anal beads. They where promptly burned.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2014, 11:01:06 PM
Maybe he got the bag mixed up that morning and left in his wife's toys. By the volume involved she wouldn't be too happy as it seems as though she doesn't like a cock up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 31 January, 2014, 06:24:04 PM
Bloody tax office twats, why do they have so much trouble working out what I should be paying.

Ever since I began work I have been plagued with tax issues, I seem to be stuck in a cycle of K codes followed by rebates followed by K codes followed by rebates. Two years ago the tax office looked at my tax all the way back to 2004 and gave me a big rebate and all was well until I changed jobs 14 months ago and the cycle seems to have begun again.

From the start of the next tax year I will be on a K code so that they can claw back an extra £1500. The stupid thing is that if the pattern follows, they will give it back to me the year after.

To top it all off, the wife has been wrongly put on a BR tax code for her £5K a year part time job which means that she pays 20% tax on a job that doesn't even qualify to pay tax.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 03 February, 2014, 11:41:43 AM
45 minutes on the phone to Sage being passed from dept to dept, eventually to be told I have to send them an email. ~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 03 February, 2014, 12:08:20 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2014, 11:01:06 PM
Maybe he got the bag mixed up that morning and left in his wife's toys. By the volume involved she wouldn't be too happy as it seems as though she doesn't like a cock up.

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 03 February, 2014, 01:40:41 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 21 January, 2014, 11:07:42 AM
Was cycling home last night from the gym and was clipped by a speeding car. I landed on my feet but I cracked my mouth on my handle bars, breaking the crown of my two top incisors and one of my lower ones. As im a student i'll be paying less for the treatment but it's still gonna cost a pretty penny. No comics for me for a month.  :|

And yes, it hurts like a bitch. Got a feeling the speeder was Jonathan Ross after he saw my comment in the other thread.

Is that stretch of road covered by CCTV? You could ask for the recording and see if you can identify the car... You must have a claim surly?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 03 February, 2014, 01:50:37 PM
Even if you can't trace the car but can show his negligence caused you an injury you would be able to claim via the MIB. That's the Motor Insurers' Bureau not The Men in Black. They would normally require that you report the matter to the police though.

http://www.mib.org.uk/Home/en/default.htm (http://www.mib.org.uk/Home/en/default.htm)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 03 February, 2014, 05:03:06 PM
I could if it werent for thefact I know it will be more trouble than it will be worth. :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 03 February, 2014, 09:56:19 PM
No jobs whatsoever in my local area (Blyth/Morpeth/Cramlington/Ashington), only those with experience may apply. Yet my parents have it in their heads that their are jobs available in my local area,but neither the job search sites, nor the job centre are helpful!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 04 February, 2014, 12:36:19 PM
I've got pins and needles in my arms.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 04 February, 2014, 02:37:10 PM
You should still claim Hawkmonger. What's the worst that could happen? It turns into 'more trouble than its worth' would mean what, if you calculate your time spent on this as minimum wage. £20?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 04 February, 2014, 04:02:26 PM
And now I forgot an appointment with Ingeus today, even though I told them I'd be unavailable on Tuesdays. Their excuse is that they forgot, and I'm to blame for not reminding them!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 04 February, 2014, 04:58:57 PM
Had a Tetanus jab today, so my arm is a bit sore. And I got stung by some stinging nettles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 04 February, 2014, 05:13:02 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 04 February, 2014, 04:02:26 PM
And now I forgot an appointment with Ingeus today, even though I told them I'd be unavailable on Tuesdays. Their excuse is that they forgot, and I'm to blame for not reminding them!!!

I feel you, BSC, but get on top of that shit right now, because they will peg you as a troublemaker and fast-track you to shit schemes you shouldn't even be on in the first place.  I personally encountered a lot of anger from other participants whose stories made it clear that they were actually being blocked from finding work by the schemes rather than enabled, and one of the courses dedicated to improving participants' computer skills and literacy was being run by a woman who complained that the computers we used weren't working properly "because they keep putting red lines under words."
I repeat: computer skills and literacy.

You'd expect there to be a higher standard for schemes run by liars and incompetents with no actual purpose beyond giving public money to the private sector and normalising unpaid work positions while reducing the most vulnerable members of the poor to a sub-class of untrained labor who are actively blocked by the schemes from seeking educational qualifications, but here we are.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 04 February, 2014, 07:57:07 PM
Thank you Professor B, will do!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 February, 2014, 09:12:16 AM
Woke up this morning duh duh duh duh duh.
Ignored storm as I loaded my poor Fiesta to the roof with the muddy tools of my muddy trade, shovels,mattocks, generator, submersible pump, total station, surveying gear, drawing boards, rain gear etc. etc,
Noticed tyre was totally flat.
Unloaded the tools of my trade etc., still ignoring storm, in order to get at stupidly located spare tyre.
Changed tyre, finding driving rain and staggering gusts increasingly hard to ignore.
Reloaded car with etc.  Noticed cat had been into my bag and eaten my sandwiches while my attention was on wheel and storm.
Tried to start car. Nothing.
Tried to find neighbour to beg a jump start. No-one home.
Rang nearby friends and relations.  All at work.

Did I mention it's raining?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 05 February, 2014, 10:38:18 AM
Cat ate your sandwiches? Clever girl...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 05 February, 2014, 07:34:29 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 05 February, 2014, 09:12:16 AM
Woke up this morning duh duh duh duh duh.
Ignored storm as I loaded my poor Fiesta to the roof with the muddy tools of my muddy trade, shovels,mattocks, generator, submersible pump, total station, surveying gear, drawing boards, rain gear etc. etc,
Noticed tyre was totally flat.
Unloaded the tools of my trade etc., still ignoring storm, in order to get at stupidly located spare tyre.
Changed tyre, finding driving rain and staggering gusts increasingly hard to ignore.
Reloaded car with etc.  Noticed cat had been into my bag and eaten my sandwiches while my attention was on wheel and storm.
Tried to start car. Nothing.
Tried to find neighbour to beg a jump start. No-one home.
Rang nearby friends and relations.  All at work.

Did I mention it's raining?

Any floods up your neck of the woods Tordelback?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 February, 2014, 09:42:02 PM
Quote from: Ancient Otter on 05 February, 2014, 07:34:29 PM
Any floods up your neck of the woods Tordelback?

Thankfully I live on a hill, so no.  However this is the sight that greeted me when I finally made it to work:

(http://imageshack.com/a/img819/2413/tkmc.jpg)

Note forlorn sponge and basin in centre.  I was supposed to be digging holes somewhere under all that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 05 February, 2014, 09:44:22 PM
Bah,mI feel for you Tordels. That must be an excruciating series of events. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 05 February, 2014, 09:45:12 PM
:O:O:O and I thought OUR site was wet today. sshheeesh.

I did find out one of my new co-workers is a veteran squaxx though which is a nice surprise!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 February, 2014, 09:53:14 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 05 February, 2014, 09:44:22 PM
Bah,mI feel for you Tordels. That must be an excruciating series of events. :(

Nah, it was more amusing than annoying really.  After half a bottle of wine anyway.  Apart from the sandwiches, that is.  There are some crimes that can never be forgiven.  Find your own duvet tonight, bastard cat.

Happily we had worked hard and late Tuesday in anticipation of the weather, and got almost everything critical sorted, although even that had required a pump running full tilt all day so there was no hope at all today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 05 February, 2014, 10:02:41 PM
Luckily got a text from a friend of mine up Cumbria and our usual fossil scrounging site is above sea level but highly saturated by rain water. Bodes well for Trilobite and trace fossils next time i'm on my hands and knee's.

Have you ever been in this situation before Tordels? Previously colleges of mine have had to drain flooded sites with pumps to get to the bottom, hope you don't have to go through that frustrating task. :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 February, 2014, 10:24:44 PM
Oh yuss.  So often that some years ago I bought my own little genny and submersible pump, reasoning that everyone always wants to hire the bloody things on the same morning and the queuing and disappointment was becoming too much.  I love my pump dearly, or at least a lot more than the half day of back-breaking bucket chains that seemed to constitute much of my working life prior to that.  (One job I worked on in Mayo in the 80's, we estimated that we (a team of 8) had spent an average of 200 hours a week bailing a site - it rained every single day for a month).

Good luck with your trilobites, Hawk.  All I've ever found are crinoids, although the wife has a nice little ammonite from a gravel driveway.   :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 06 February, 2014, 12:12:42 AM
Have spent the last 2 and a half days browsing house plans. Am almost at the point of ramming a drill into the side of my head.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 06 February, 2014, 05:01:22 AM
Not too sure if this is germaine to this topic, but what ever happened th Floyd Kermode?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 February, 2014, 12:19:33 PM
Been playing Flappy Bird and I swear to god I want to kill someone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 08 February, 2014, 02:31:49 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 06 February, 2014, 05:01:22 AM
Not too sure if this is germaine to this topic, but what ever happened th Floyd Kermode?

Many things. He continues to exist, but doesn't post here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 02:50:25 PM
Quote from: Trout Trousers on 08 February, 2014, 02:31:49 PMHe continues to exist, but doesn't post here.

I'm not sure I follow you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 08 February, 2014, 03:51:21 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 02:50:25 PM
Quote from: Trout Trousers on 08 February, 2014, 02:31:49 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 06 February, 2014, 05:01:22 AM
Not too sure if this is germaine to this topic, but what ever happened Floyd Kermode?

He continues to exist, but doesn't post here.

I'm not sure I follow you.

https://twitter.com/floydthek

http://www.2000ad.org/?zone=input&page=profiles&choice=FLOYDK

https://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=115.0

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 05:50:50 PM
Quote from: sauchie olympics on 08 February, 2014, 03:51:21 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 02:50:25 PM
Quote from: Trout Trousers on 08 February, 2014, 02:31:49 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 06 February, 2014, 05:01:22 AM
Not too sure if this is germaine to this topic, but what ever happened Floyd Kermode?

He continues to exist, but doesn't post here.

I'm not sure I follow you.

https://twitter.com/floydthek

http://www.2000ad.org/?zone=input&page=profiles&choice=FLOYDK

https://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=115.0


Nah, not buying it.  No-one and nothing exists outside this forum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 08 February, 2014, 05:52:38 PM
It took me a week, but I finally sorted out a whole passel o' problems with my British bank account. Who knew that not being in the country would MAKE NO DIFFERENCE WHATSOEVER TO THE SERVICE PROVIDED BY A BRITISH BANK BECAUSE IT WAS ALWAYS FUCKING SHIT?

Apologies. Some frustration leaking out there. In summation: my Canadian bank gives much better service. I can phone a bank employee whom I've met, for example.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 08 February, 2014, 06:01:06 PM
The grass is always greener Trout

There'll be just as much shit there as here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 06:21:13 PM
Quote from: Trout Trousers on 08 February, 2014, 05:52:38 PMI can phone a bank employee whom I've met, for example.

Bullshit.  Hallucination caused by bacon overdose, only explanation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 08 February, 2014, 06:21:24 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 05:50:50 PM
Nah, not buying it.  No-one and nothing exists outside this forum.

I've seen you tweeting that Mary Beard, like some common whore.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 06:30:42 PM
Quote from: sauchie olympics on 08 February, 2014, 06:21:24 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 February, 2014, 05:50:50 PM
Nah, not buying it.  No-one and nothing exists outside this forum.

I've seen you tweeting that Mary Beard, like some common whore.

Man can't even used the internet to indulge his fantasies anymore. :think:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 09 February, 2014, 09:47:38 PM
Because while I was at work yesterday, my daughter accidentally knocked over my Xbox. Went to play it today and my newest disc, Dark Souls, that was inside, is now scratched to buggery and won't read.  :'(  15 hours play now wasted. Kids? Who'd have em?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 09 February, 2014, 09:53:47 PM
Christ, he has 177 Twitter followers! I am reading through a 2 decade backlog of Megazines and he monopolises the letter page for at least 5 - 6 years....some kid that boy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 10 February, 2014, 10:32:33 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 08 February, 2014, 12:19:33 PM
Been playing Flappy Bird and I swear to god I want to kill someone.
It's on BBC red button/teletext today that the bloke who made this has removed it for sale because he doesn't want the fame or something (but he hasn't ruled out a sequel).
Anyway, my most recent impediment is Firefox won't come up on my computer all of a sudden so I'm using an old Internet Explorer until I get to see my mate who understands these computers much more than I do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 10 February, 2014, 11:17:48 AM
Tordelback, if you get a new disc it will restore where you had played to. Of course that means spending out on one. PS if it is scratched that generalyl means it was knocked over whilst it was turned on.

Alternatively no harm done trying one of these methods http://electronics.howstuffworks.com/repair-scratched-cd.htm . I have actually had success with toothpaste way back in the day. There are also commercial products that work, once helped me fix a borrowed DVD when I first got my PS1 and felt like I'd ruined the entire world by scratching my uncle's Die Hard Trilogy.

My impediments today include an old cantankerous bastard who swore at me for being on a bike (so I nobly told him to shuffle off and die, not too proud of that), my headphones getting caught on a handle at work and breaking just 2 weeks after their purchase, and my wife's constant agony over dental problems and the way this ruins every single thing we do together and always seems to be caused by the work the dentists actually do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 February, 2014, 11:27:34 AM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 10 February, 2014, 11:17:48 AM
Tordelback, if you get a new disc it will restore where you had played to. Of course that means spending out on one. PS if it is scratched that generalyl means it was knocked over whilst it was turned on.

That's Darren you'd be wanting, but good advice all the same!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 10 February, 2014, 12:27:37 PM
You all look the same to me :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 10 February, 2014, 12:50:35 PM
Thanks Theblazeuk. I've already ordered a new copy of the game. Only 15 quid, so not too bothered. Also, turns out you're right. She was playing a Zoo keeper game or something. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 10 February, 2014, 05:20:50 PM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 10 February, 2014, 10:32:33 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 08 February, 2014, 12:19:33 PM
Been playing Flappy Bird and I swear to god I want to kill someone.

It's on BBC red button/teletext today that the bloke who made this has removed it for sale because he doesn't want the fame or something (but he hasn't ruled out a sequel).

... and gets the stupid game its first mention on mainstream media as a result. See also Shia LeBeouf's staged walk out at the Berlin film festival yesterday.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 10 February, 2014, 05:22:44 PM
Quote from: sauchie olympics on 10 February, 2014, 05:20:50 PM
See also Shia LeBeouf's staged walk out at the Berlin film festival yesterday.

(http://i.imgur.com/phfmPPy.jpg?1)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 10 February, 2014, 05:27:37 PM
Quote from: sauchie olympics on 10 February, 2014, 05:20:50 PM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 10 February, 2014, 10:32:33 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 08 February, 2014, 12:19:33 PM
Been playing Flappy Bird and I swear to god I want to kill someone.

It's on BBC red button/teletext today that the bloke who made this has removed it for sale because he doesn't want the fame or something (but he hasn't ruled out a sequel).

... and gets the stupid game its first mention on mainstream media as a result. See also Shia LeBeouf's staged walk out at the Berlin film festival yesterday.

Exactly. See also Michael Bay's refusal to be interviewed without a prompt screen.

Ah well, Flappy Bird is very addictive anyway...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2014, 05:31:53 PM
That LeBeouf's one arrant, annoying little prick. LeBeouf; LeBite more like.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 10 February, 2014, 06:47:04 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2014, 05:31:53 PM
That LeBeouf's one arrant, annoying little prick. LeBeouf; LeBite more like.

Fun fact! - If you do a Google image search for Arseface (relevant what with the new Preacher series coming up), Mr la Boo Hoo hoof's face shows up several times on the first couple of pages!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2014, 06:51:49 PM
 :lol:Tombo:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 10 February, 2014, 08:03:57 PM
Quote from: Charlie boy on 10 February, 2014, 10:32:33 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 08 February, 2014, 12:19:33 PM
Been playing Flappy Bird and I swear to god I want to kill someone.
It's on BBC red button/teletext today that the bloke who made this has removed it for sale because he doesn't want the fame or something (but he hasn't ruled out a sequel).

He's received a lot of plagiarism claims over the game apparently.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 10 February, 2014, 10:18:16 PM
Not had a good day today on this forum, feeling mighty pissed >:( >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 11 February, 2014, 07:02:27 AM
In work at 6.30am this morning for meeting with Nightshift.....YAAAWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 11 February, 2014, 05:23:34 PM
I have a cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 February, 2014, 06:11:18 PM
I'd been schlepping around in a blizzard for about 4 hours today, which I suppose constitutes a change from if not an improvement on rain, when my mother rang.  On reporting the weather conditions through chattering teeth, I was met with "lucky you, that sounds lovely!".   :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 11 February, 2014, 07:45:32 PM
A while ago I got a notice from Gollancz that I was going to receive a copy of Simon Ings' new book Wolves to review. I've been wondering why it never showed up when I just realised today that they had my old address from last year. *face smack*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 11 February, 2014, 08:14:54 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 11 February, 2014, 05:23:34 PM
I have a cold.

So this can be usefully after;

(http://i.imgur.com/2YBS1Hy.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 11 February, 2014, 10:58:12 PM
I didn't say anything about flu. Or it's sexist "man flu" variant. I just have a cold.  It's a minor impediment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 11 February, 2014, 11:09:54 PM
I always thought man flu was just a silly term for common cold. I've used it myself quite a few times over the last few days (horrible coughing fits and completely blocked sinuses). :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2014, 10:34:38 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 11 February, 2014, 11:09:54 PM
I always thought man flu was just a silly term for common cold.

It is. It's a sexist term mocking of men for their supposed (and undocumented) inability to work through minor or imagined illness, fully embraced by the advertising world. Inexplicably it has been co-opted by men to describe, even celebrate, their own illnesses. 

There are few modern coinages or repurposings that annoy me more, 'retarded' being the only one that springs to mind.  'Belieber' is actively witty by comparison.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 12 February, 2014, 11:14:37 AM
I heard someone say, sniffling, 'I've caught a bout of man-flu.'

Me: 'Er... you just mean you've caught a cold, I think.'

'Yeah, it's man-flu.'

'...But you don't actually mean man-flu. It's not a real thing. It's just something people say to make fun of men when they have a cold. You can't describe yourself as having man-flu - it's like admitting you're making a fuss over nothing.'

'What? Fuck off, that's not what it means. I'm a man, I've got flu. So fucking man-flu.'

I didn't bother trying to argue the point any further.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 February, 2014, 11:24:08 AM
Actually I can see where he's coming from. Men have always been more susceptible to minor illnesses so I thought it was just a gimmicky name. Hell, I had no idea it had such a discriminatory background.  :-\
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 12 February, 2014, 01:22:34 PM
'Man Flu' is one of those kind of prefab 'jokes' for people who don't have a very developed sense of humour. So much of this tedious 'humour' revolves around the alleged differences between men and women.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 12 February, 2014, 04:52:32 PM
You can't have a go at reverse-sexism, lads, that's 50 percent of the modern advertising executive's toolbox (the other 50 percent being theft).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 February, 2014, 05:25:15 PM
Been giving it (perhaps a bit to much) thought and I actually think this makes a lot of sense. I always believed that the double standard in sexism was insane but I never realised that it was so deep set.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 12 February, 2014, 07:21:20 PM
imagine the flak if the diet coke ad was a girl being ogled by blokes...
  it is annoying though, even my wife bought me some "man flu" lozenges then they wonder why we won't go to the doctor and die.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 February, 2014, 08:05:25 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 12 February, 2014, 07:21:20 PM
imagine the flak if the diet coke ad was a girl being ogled by blokes...

That's the entire rest of society you're describing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 13 February, 2014, 08:33:44 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 12 February, 2014, 08:05:25 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 12 February, 2014, 07:21:20 PM
imagine the flak if the diet coke ad was a girl being ogled by blokes...

That's the entire rest of society you're describing.

I was going to say so like the Lynx adverts each with the premise set around a guy sprays some deoderant and he's covered in semi-naked women or those microwave food ads where the bloke "cooks" something to find out the girl on the couch has lost her clothes somehow. That's a quick example that comes to mind, if I wanted another I'd watch telly for about an hour and come back with some more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 February, 2014, 08:38:47 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 12 February, 2014, 07:21:20 PM
then they wonder why we won't go to the doctor and die.

(http://stuffistolefromtheinternet.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/stubborn_men.jpg)

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 February, 2014, 08:45:03 AM
If I could be bothered I'd list the thousand ads that explicitly target a wonderful saintly 'Mum' doing the shopping, cleaning, cooking, feeding, homework help etc., with not a suggestion that it might be Dad who does these things, which in my personal entirely anecdotal experience it frequently is.  The real problem with these ads, and the man-flu crap, and the Lynx ads, is not that they pick on men or women, it's that they reinforce sexism as an integral, even defining, part of our society - these are our roles, this is the language you should use, buy these products to clarify these imposed identities, deviate from expectations and be less.

However, while I see sexism itself as the enemy of us all, I've no illusions that it's not the female half that is the majority target, and the main victim.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spaceghost on 13 February, 2014, 12:03:33 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 February, 2014, 08:45:03 AM
If I could be bothered I'd list the thousand ads that explicitly target a wonderful saintly 'Mum' doing the shopping, cleaning, cooking, feeding, homework help etc., with not a suggestion that it might be Dad who does these things, which in my personal entirely anecdotal experience it frequently is.

And worse, these adverts often end with a shot of a bemused 'Dad', who is oblivious to whatever product based epiphany the rest of the family have experienced, being tutted at by the rest of his head-shaking brood as he unwittingly makes a buffoon of himself by being a 'typical' clueless man-child.

"Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 13 February, 2014, 04:15:52 PM
Quote from: Spaceghost on 13 February, 2014, 12:03:33 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 February, 2014, 08:45:03 AM
If I could be bothered I'd list the thousand ads that explicitly target a wonderful saintly 'Mum' doing the shopping, cleaning, cooking, feeding, homework help etc., with not a suggestion that it might be Dad who does these things, which in my personal entirely anecdotal experience it frequently is.

And worse, these adverts often end with a shot of a bemused 'Dad', who is oblivious to whatever product based epiphany the rest of the family have experienced, being tutted at by the rest of his head-shaking brood as he unwittingly makes a buffoon of himself by being a 'typical' clueless man-child.

"Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"

Typically, I am the guy who does all the housework AND get's called "Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"
::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 13 February, 2014, 06:59:46 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 13 February, 2014, 04:15:52 PM
Quote from: Spaceghost on 13 February, 2014, 12:03:33 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 February, 2014, 08:45:03 AM
If I could be bothered I'd list the thousand ads that explicitly target a wonderful saintly 'Mum' doing the shopping, cleaning, cooking, feeding, homework help etc., with not a suggestion that it might be Dad who does these things, which in my personal entirely anecdotal experience it frequently is.

And worse, these adverts often end with a shot of a bemused 'Dad', who is oblivious to whatever product based epiphany the rest of the family have experienced, being tutted at by the rest of his head-shaking brood as he unwittingly makes a buffoon of himself by being a 'typical' clueless man-child.

"Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"

Typically, I am the guy who does all the housework AND get's called "Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"
::)

Then there are the adverts where the man discovers some kind of dodge to get great results with little effort (and so he can impress a woman because he hasn't fucked the job up). It always seems implicit (to me at least) that the man is trying to earn a shag by showing how domesticated he can be.
See the Karl Howman Flash Adverts or the Uncle Ben's Express Rice ads.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 13 February, 2014, 07:05:25 PM
Quote from: JamesC on 13 February, 2014, 06:59:46 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 13 February, 2014, 04:15:52 PM
Quote from: Spaceghost on 13 February, 2014, 12:03:33 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 13 February, 2014, 08:45:03 AM
If I could be bothered I'd list the thousand ads that explicitly target a wonderful saintly 'Mum' doing the shopping, cleaning, cooking, feeding, homework help etc., with not a suggestion that it might be Dad who does these things, which in my personal entirely anecdotal experience it frequently is.

And worse, these adverts often end with a shot of a bemused 'Dad', who is oblivious to whatever product based epiphany the rest of the family have experienced, being tutted at by the rest of his head-shaking brood as he unwittingly makes a buffoon of himself by being a 'typical' clueless man-child.

"Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"

Typically, I am the guy who does all the housework AND get's called "Tut! Oh dad, you thick twat!"
::)

Then there are the adverts where the man discovers some kind of dodge to get great results with little effort (and so he can impress a woman because he hasn't fucked the job up). It always seems implicit (to me at least) that the man is trying to earn a shag by showing how domesticated he can be.
See the Karl Howman Flash Adverts or the Uncle Ben's Express Rice ads.

'They've' even got Ronnie Corbett advertising meals on wheels where a male pensioner is trying to get his leg over by telling the meal delivery man to shut his mouth as he's trying to impress some pensioner totty into bed by hoodwinking her into believing 'he's' been cooking that shit up all afternoon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Charlie boy on 18 February, 2014, 10:44:17 PM
Ordered an album from an Amazon seller on the weekend (Blind Owl Records if you're wondering) and came home today to see the post had arrived. Well an album by the right band had been delivered but it wasn't the album that I had ordered.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 19 February, 2014, 04:48:52 AM
Quote from: judda fett on 13 February, 2014, 07:05:25 PM


'They've' even got Ronnie Corbett advertising meals on wheels where a male pensioner is trying to get his leg over by telling the meal delivery man to shut his mouth as he's trying to impress some pensioner totty into bed by hoodwinking her into believing 'he's' been cooking that shit up all afternoon.

If only it was that easy...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 19 February, 2014, 10:06:58 AM
...because today I excitedly skipped to the cornershop to pick up my prog and my meg, after a year and a bit of not having an order... and was greeted by a sopping, sodden prog, which they could not understand why I did not want. A minor argument then played out, and they agreed to check their other shops for an extra copy, or order me a new one. But they wouldn't let me take away the one that I had already paid for. So I am progless.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 19 February, 2014, 10:51:32 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 19 February, 2014, 10:06:58 AM
...because today I excitedly skipped to the cornershop to pick up my prog and my meg, after a year and a bit of not having an order... and was greeted by a sopping, sodden prog, which they could not understand why I did not want. A minor argument then played out, and they agreed to check their other shops for an extra copy, or order me a new one. But they wouldn't let me take away the one that I had already paid for. So I am progless.

SBT

I can relate. I used to pick my prog up after work on a Wed and used to piss me off when it was raining as I left work cos I knew their would be little chance of me getting the prog from shop to home without being soaked. Progday occasionally would be moved to a Thurs or Fri depending on weather.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 19 February, 2014, 02:28:04 PM
I had a cold... I gave it away....

Last night I had to par boil life back in to my feet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 20 February, 2014, 05:35:09 PM
Trying to buy 'One -Way' or 'Emigration' insurance (for my journey), and nearly every website I try to get a quote from wants me to enter a 'return date'.

It's emigration insurance, you fucking clowns.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 20 February, 2014, 07:55:05 PM
I'm finding myself drawn into an argument over whether Dredd is a 'reboot' of the Stallone film or not. I really should just step back and ignore the clod.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 22 February, 2014, 08:06:47 PM
grrr stupid depereshion has struck again this time in a dirfent ways back for the last fue month Ive been so down I could not get anything done even opening figures but this last week ive been on half turm and Ive been using it to open all the figures im anout 3/4 way throw the stack when I find one of the ones is missing parts when I open it and I think ive left it to long to complin and get a replacement so now I've lost out on £10
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 24 February, 2014, 06:31:59 AM
No matter how much I change my diet or work out, I can't seem to get bigger. Not noticeably so anyway. The struggle for freakishly big arms continues.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 24 February, 2014, 10:01:08 AM
Eggs and tuna for breakfast not working?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 24 February, 2014, 11:59:40 AM
According to my diet I should have guns like Lou Ferrigno...



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 February, 2014, 12:43:53 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 24 February, 2014, 10:01:08 AM
Eggs and tuna for breakfast not working?

I know this came from a Frasier episode but might that help a little for CL2K as well?  I think they suggested that sometimes, lack of protein in the morning can make you feel all listless and challenges too much etc.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 24 February, 2014, 02:00:13 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 24 February, 2014, 12:43:53 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 24 February, 2014, 10:01:08 AM
Eggs and tuna for breakfast not working?
I know this came from a Frasier episode but might that help a little for CL2K as well?  I think they suggested that sometimes, lack of protein in the morning can make you feel all listless and challenges too much etc.
You're saying he should have a wank before he gets out of bed?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheldipez on 24 February, 2014, 02:33:01 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 24 February, 2014, 02:00:13 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 24 February, 2014, 12:43:53 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 24 February, 2014, 10:01:08 AM
Eggs and tuna for breakfast not working?
I know this came from a Frasier episode but might that help a little for CL2K as well?  I think they suggested that sometimes, lack of protein in the morning can make you feel all listless and challenges too much etc.
You're saying he should have a wank before he gets out of bed?

How else does one start the day?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 February, 2014, 07:13:45 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 24 February, 2014, 02:00:13 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 24 February, 2014, 12:43:53 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 24 February, 2014, 10:01:08 AM
Eggs and tuna for breakfast not working?
I know this came from a Frasier episode but might that help a little for CL2K as well?  I think they suggested that sometimes, lack of protein in the morning can make you feel all listless and challenges too much etc.
You're saying he should have a wank before he gets out of bed?

or the shower. Or both.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 February, 2014, 09:26:33 AM
'Insert Wolf of Wall Street joke here'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 28 February, 2014, 07:49:25 AM
I just typed out a post, hit post and for whatever reason I got taken back to the main page and my post never went up :(

A glitch in the matrix I guess
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 February, 2014, 12:19:36 PM
are you on 'always logged in'or with a time limit? - you may have been logged out while typing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 March, 2014, 11:03:18 PM
Here's a very minor impediment, but one that has me a bit stumped.

The work continues to trickle in sufficient to keep me busy 5 or even 6 days a week, and I even got my first cheque of the year at the weekend (hey, it's only March), but now my best buddy wants us to set up a side business together.  It's a good idea, it plays to and requires our different strengths, and could be a long-running seasonal thing that'd give us something regular to work around amidst all the random tendering we both do. Also, potentially fun.

Thing is, I haven't exactly had the best experience of business partners, much of which is my own fault, and I dread the idea of going through all that with someone I really care about.  I also still have huge debts hovering over me from my failed business, which could see me going to the wall at any minute: that's one thing when I'm a sole trader (I took that risk when I started), another when I'm half of someone else's business.  I've just about dragged my depressive arse round to working on my own, I don't know if I'm ready for colleagues again yet.

Ultimately, I don't want to risk losing a very dear friend to the stresses of working with them (or more to the point, them working with me).

But how to explain this to them, when their whole business idea is specifically built around the two of us working together?  I'd basically be scuppering a rather clever scheme all because of possibly groundless worries.  Gah, I think I preferred it* when I was a parasite on the body politic and not a thrusting entreprenurial lodestone of the heritage industry.


*Not really.  Did I tell you I bought a sandwich last week?  In a shop?  It was ace.  Well, not the sandwich, the novelty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ancient Otter on 04 March, 2014, 11:16:20 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 04 March, 2014, 11:03:18 PM
Here's a very minor impediment, but one that has me a bit stumped.

The work continues to trickle in sufficient to keep me busy 5 or even 6 days a week, and I even got my first cheque of the year at the weekend (hey, it's only March), but now my best buddy wants us to set up a side business together.  It's a good idea, it plays to and requires our different strengths, and could be a long-running seasonal thing that'd give us something regular to work around amidst all the random tendering we both do. Also, potentially fun.

Thing is, I haven't exactly had the best experience of business partners, much of which is my own fault, and I dread the idea of going through all that with someone I really care about.  I also still have huge debts hovering over me from my failed business, which could see me going to the wall at any minute: that's one thing when I'm a sole trader (I took that risk when I started), another when I'm half of someone else's business.  I've just about dragged my depressive arse round to working on my own, I don't know if I'm ready for colleagues again yet.

Ultimately, I don't want to risk losing a very dear friend to the stresses of working with them (or more to the point, them working with me).

But how to explain this to them, when their whole business idea is specifically built around the two of us working together?  I'd basically be scuppering a rather clever scheme all because of possibly groundless worries.  Gah, I think I preferred it* when I was a parasite on the body politic and not a thrusting entreprenurial lodestone of the heritage industry.


*Not really.  Did I tell you I bought a sandwich last week?  In a shop?  It was ace.  Well, not the sandwich, the novelty.

Well TordelBack if he really is your best friend he should know what you have been through the last few years and should understand it when you explain to him why you think it's not a good idea. Best friends are hard to replace!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 05 March, 2014, 12:27:22 AM
Business and family, never a good mix, kinda extends to good friends too. If you explained your perspective and situation and see how it goes, if it's a good idea it just be worth following.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 05 March, 2014, 09:29:19 PM
Give it a go, explain your doubts. Plus inability to get any further into debt over this one.

Nothing better than working with friends when it works out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 March, 2014, 09:33:57 PM
Could you express your concerns, agree to do one project as a trial, and then re-assess?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 March, 2014, 10:05:29 PM
Thanks for the advice, folks, all very helpful.  I was a bit the worse for drink when I wrote the original post, and have had more sensible thoughts since, but essentially the sentiments remain.  Having the previous phase of my working life crash down around my ears has made me acutely conscious of the relative importance of friends and work, and the difficulty of maintaining friendships when the latter goes arse over tit. 

I think a drink-free lunch and a long chat are in order, put all my concerns on the table and see what comes out of it: despite their enthusiasm I'd rather let my mate down now than fuck up their livelihood and/or our relationship.  Turns out we actually have a different simpler thing we can work on together first, so that'll be a useful toe in the water and pretext to talk all this stuff through.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 06 March, 2014, 07:48:03 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 05 March, 2014, 10:05:29 PM
Thanks for the advice, folks, all very helpful.  I was a bit the worse for drink when I wrote the original post, and have had more sensible thoughts since, but essentially the sentiments remain.  Having the previous phase of my working life crash down around my ears has made me acutely conscious of the relative importance of friends and work, and the difficulty of maintaining friendships when the latter goes arse over tit. 

I think a drink-free lunch and a long chat are in order, put all my concerns on the table and see what comes out of it: despite their enthusiasm I'd rather let my mate down now than fuck up their livelihood and/or our relationship.  Turns out we actually have a different simpler thing we can work on together first, so that'll be a useful toe in the water and pretext to talk all this stuff through.

Get an agreement about what happens when you fall out. Best case: You don't ever use it. Worst case: It saves a lot of misery
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 06 March, 2014, 07:48:22 AM
And my impediment is:

We've got mice.

EDIT: On the upside, there is nothing quite as satisfying as killing the wee bastiches. Sod this "humane" stuff. You come into my house, you eat my food, you piss on my floor, you die.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 March, 2014, 08:01:41 AM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 06 March, 2014, 07:48:22 AM
EDIT: On the upside, there is nothing quite as satisfying as killing the wee bastiches. Sod this "humane" stuff. You come into my house, you eat my food, you piss on my floor, you die.
How are the kids?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 06 March, 2014, 07:42:26 PM
L, as the kids say, OL.

I used humane traps during the great mouse war of 2000 but after three weeks, there was evidence that the little buggers were inching ever closer to Teeny Baby Tips bedroom (and he was a teeny, teeny baby) so I had to put poison down.

Only later did I find out that you need to take them miles away before releasing them from humane traps otherwise they just come back in.

I'm sorry mice. I really am.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 07 March, 2014, 01:35:43 AM
Kill them all. Inhumane traps, baited with chocolate, work best. After nine years in rural Perthshire I became an expert.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 07 March, 2014, 05:33:44 AM
Coincidentally I came into work yesterday and my colleague informed me we had mice there and proceeded to show me the droppings behind the photocopier. (I wouldn't have known what they were!) "So don't leave the biscuits out, " she said.

My reaction: "Aw. I like mice." I guess I'm odd.

The management isn't showing any sign of dealing with them yet, but now I'm thinking of preemptive measures before we're told to call pest control and the likely mousey genocide. A humane team or two I think. I can take em home and drop em off at one of the Woodland walks near my place. They could end up fox/cat munchies but I'd prefer that to poisoning. Kinda seems more  natural although cats can be cruel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 07 March, 2014, 08:06:38 AM
My arms are getting smaller! Well maybe not. But it sure looks like it. I think it's an optical illusion and the rest of me is getting bigger but to me all I see is smaller arms. I can understand why people take steroids though. The struggle for getting bigger continues....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 March, 2014, 12:22:51 PM
We used Peanut Butter. It's sticky and they can't just carry it away so there's more chance of them springing the trap. They are so light, it's really hard to know if there's actually anything inside those humane traps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 07 March, 2014, 12:44:24 PM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 07 March, 2014, 08:06:38 AM
My arms are getting smaller! Well maybe not. But it sure looks like it. I think it's an optical illusion and the rest of me is getting bigger but to me all I see is smaller arms. I can understand why people take steroids though. The struggle for getting bigger continues....

I picturing you now with short, T-Rex like arms. Can you reach your belt still?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 07 March, 2014, 12:58:35 PM
(http://global3.memecdn.com/unstoppable-t-rex_o_1622281.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 07 March, 2014, 01:01:32 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 07 March, 2014, 01:15:31 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 07 March, 2014, 12:22:51 PM
We used Peanut Butter. It's sticky and they can't just carry it away so there's more chance of them springing the trap. They are so light, it's really hard to know if there's actually anything inside those humane traps.

Yeah, chocolate spread is good, too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 08 March, 2014, 09:40:10 AM
Downloaded 'gravity' from the Playstation Store last night, got ten minutes into it and it stopped. "File is corrupted". Knickers. Tried to download again, but it wouldn't allow it without paying again. So I have to try to sort that out today with the helpline. We watched the 2013 Texas Chainsaw on DVD again instead.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 08 March, 2014, 10:19:24 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 08 March, 2014, 09:40:10 AM
Downloaded 'gravity' from the Playstation Store last night, got ten minutes into it and it stopped... watched the 2013 Texas Chainsaw on DVD again instead.
SBT

This is the greatest Movie yet to be made! I had the misfortune to find myself watching 'Friday the 13th Part 4'  on some music channel last night. It had every cliche in the horror lexican and I couldn't bring myself to stay to the end.

'Chainsaws in Space!' Now that's a Movie.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Recrewt on 08 March, 2014, 11:10:19 AM
Quote from: IAMTHESYSTEM on 08 March, 2014, 10:19:24 AM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 08 March, 2014, 09:40:10 AM
Downloaded 'gravity' from the Playstation Store last night, got ten minutes into it and it stopped... watched the 2013 Texas Chainsaw on DVD again instead.
SBT

This is the greatest Movie yet to be made! I had the misfortune to find myself watching 'Friday the 13th Part 4'  on some music channel last night. It had every cliche in the horror lexican and I couldn't bring myself to stay to the end.

'Chainsaws in Space!' Now that's a Movie.

Yeah, I saw that - not the best of the F13 movies.  They have done the 'chainsaws in space' type movie as well with Jason X.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 08 March, 2014, 11:28:09 AM
Damn you Hollywood, Damn you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 10 March, 2014, 08:35:46 AM
Humans 1.
Rodents 0.

We've won the battle, gentlemen. But the war goes on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 March, 2014, 02:45:42 PM
According to a Solicitor we are having to deal with (and who seemingly refuses to take my calls), the Marriage Certificate which was hand-written on watermarked paper in black ink, signed by the Deputy Superintendent Registrar before the very eyes of ourselves and the 70-strong congregation, and which was presented to us during our wedding ceremony, is not ample evidence of my wife and I being married.

Rather than have me send this very certificate to them in order to prove we're married, the Solicitor's assistant says that I have to get it photocopied, get this photocopy signed by a clerk at a Post Office, and then send the signed photocopy.

How that makes any sort of sense, and how these people make more money than me, I really don't know.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Daveycandlish on 10 March, 2014, 05:31:16 PM
I'm surprised they didn't ask for a photocopy of your wife as well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 10 March, 2014, 10:23:04 PM
Quote from: Banners on 10 March, 2014, 02:45:42 PM
According to a Solicitor we are having to deal with (and who seemingly refuses to take my calls), the Marriage Certificate which was hand-written on watermarked paper in black ink, signed by the Deputy Superintendent Registrar before the very eyes of ourselves and the 70-strong congregation, and which was presented to us during our wedding ceremony, is not ample evidence of my wife and I being married.

Rather than have me send this very certificate to them in order to prove we're married, the Solicitor's assistant says that I have to get it photocopied, get this photocopy signed by a clerk at a Post Office, and then send the signed photocopy.

How that makes any sort of sense, and how these people make more money than me, I really don't know.

There's a kind of good news/ bad news thing there. On the one hand, you might not be married. On the other hand, you might not be married.

(NB - yes, I am currently writing a best man's speech)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 11 March, 2014, 04:20:21 AM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 10 March, 2014, 10:23:04 PM
There's a kind of good news/ bad news thing there. On the one hand, you might not be married. On the other hand, you might not be married.

That actually happened to me, about 15 years back.  We discovered that the marriage certificate had been signed in the wrong places (groom & chief bridesmaid transposed).  Despite the true situation being readily evident to anybody looking at the certificate, it caused a truck-load of fuss and we had to get it fixed to ensure we were legally married.  If only I'd have had the sense to run off at that point...   ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 13 March, 2014, 07:30:18 PM
Had an ingrown toenail removed by a chiropodist during my lunch break today.
No anaesthetic. F-ckin OUCH.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 14 March, 2014, 02:05:49 PM
I wanted to go out and buy the latest Casefiles at lunch today but instead had to spend my time buying stuff for my new flat. While I'm sure the bathmat and clothes stand will be useful I'd much rather have got the Casefile.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 March, 2014, 10:03:19 AM
Failed my bloody driving test. Immediately wanted to go for a couples of pints then remembered that it's 9 in the morning!

Shove your roundabouts up your arse, I'm off to America.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 21 March, 2014, 10:39:49 AM
Quote from: radiator on 21 March, 2014, 10:03:19 AM
it's 9 in the morning!


Known round these parts as "Beer O'Clock".

Shame Radiator, but I wouldn't worry bout it.
Will you need a UK licence to be able to apply for one in the States?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: 8-Ball on 21 March, 2014, 11:38:49 AM
Quote from: radiator on 21 March, 2014, 10:03:19 AM
Failed my bloody driving test. Immediately wanted to go for a couples of pints then remembered that it's 9 in the morning!

Shove your roundabouts up your arse, I'm off to America.

I failed mine 16 times. Yes, that is SIXTEEN times. I'm pretty sure they just passed me so that they didn't have to see me again. :'( Chin up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 March, 2014, 12:24:35 PM
Took me four goes to get it. Never mind, Radiator. You'll get another chance soon enough.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2014, 12:25:36 PM
Quote from: radiator on 21 March, 2014, 10:03:19 AM
Failed my bloody driving test. Immediately wanted to go for a couples of pints then remembered that it's 9 in the morning!

Shove your roundabouts up your arse, I'm off to America.

I think you'll find they call them "Roataries".  And they were so few and far between in California that we didn't notice that's what the sat nav called them till we got back to Blighty.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 March, 2014, 12:39:39 PM
I'm pretty sure I'll have no problem once roundabouts and manual gears are out of the equation! Control of the car is fine, I have no problems at all with maneuvers, just get a bit rattled at busy junctions and roundabouts.

I know there's a lot of macho pride bullshit that goes along with  learning manual, but to be honest I found the experience weirdly antiquated and needlessly fiddly, with no discernible advantage over automatic.

Just getting used to the gears is a big barrier which takes a good 10 hours to get comfortable with, and makes the (infinitely more important) observation side of things far trickier to concentrate on.

At the end of the day I just think I could have done with another 5-10 hours of lessons, but time was very tight. I don't think I would take a test in London again either - it's nervewracking enough without having to contend with those nightmare roundabouts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 21 March, 2014, 03:21:53 PM
toilet got blocked and started leaking! and the steam part of the steam shower stopped working due to the plastic bit that gets hot melting  !  so waiting in for my plumber bloke.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 21 March, 2014, 03:26:36 PM
Radiator: Would it be possible for you to try and book your next test further out towards the sticks? I did mine down in south London (Morden possibly) and found it was much better than a lot of the places in the more built up areas. I certainly didn't have the same horror stories as my friends who went through Wood Green Test Centre, which was the one nearest to where I lived. The roads seemed slightly calmer which definitely helped.

I should point out that I only passed on my third attempt so this isn't totally perfect. I would put that down to my own failings though rather than any in the area where I was driving.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 21 March, 2014, 05:24:23 PM

I failed twice, and I was just as pish on my third (successful) attempt as I was on the previous two. All the best drivers pass on attempt number two or three; my pal passed first time, and used to give me terrible stick for failing - he's written off three cars so far, and the worst I've done is reverse into an unsighted bollard with a works van at low speed.

Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 March, 2014, 06:17:39 PM
I gather that a lot comes down to the individual examiners discretion. I heard that it can help to try and chat to them and build a rapport, but my one was rather humourless and cold.

It's also annoying that nerves really get to you and cause you to make stupid mistakes.

I really don't relish the prospect of retaking it - an unpleasant experience that put me in a foul mood for the rest of the day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 March, 2014, 07:54:34 PM
I wouldn't care much about failing the test as I know people I wouldn't trust with a tv remote who got it first time out.

I never bothered with getting a licence as there were two people licenced to give the mandatory driving lessons in my hometown, one was decent, affable, stand-up, patient, and got along well with people, while the other was a miserable scrotum who only got work because the other guy was booked solid and - I learned later - because parents who wanted to dissuade their kids from driving booked ahead with the arsehole safe in the knowledge that a great many people who hired him once never did so again because he was so utterly unpleasant.  Blissfully ignorant of this yin/yang setup, guess which one I booked a lesson with?  I'll give you a clue: halfway through the first lesson I threatened to murder the bastard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 March, 2014, 08:15:12 PM
As I'm sure I've recounted before, my driving instructor for my (second) test, a retired law enforcement officer, advised me to have a spliff before the test.  I'm not convinced it's a very regulated profession.

As others have said, Radiator, all the best people fail at least once.  Don't let it deter you from screaming around the Oregon badlands bullseyeing womp-rats in your T16.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 March, 2014, 08:21:33 PM
I miss proper cars. These automatics (I've been here a year) kind of worry me. It all seems too easy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 21 March, 2014, 08:29:04 PM
Taking the driving test is hard, as you will be nervous and on edge, there is nothing you can do about that, it's life. The difference being is that nigh on all the other tests that you may have done before hand in your life, it was just you and some questions that needed answering, or something that needed repairing, made, etc...

This test involves everyone else doing whatever they feel like on your test route and that is the challenge! You can drive and it doesn't matter if you drive an automatic, what do you think most HGV's are today! Just don't overthink it during the time you are out on the test.

My advice is to make eye contact with the examiner, tell him you have never been so nervous in all your life and don't come across as being over confident. They are human too and even though they know you'll be nervous, it brings a human side to when they decide if they are going to tick certain boxes, as you drive along.

Good luck!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 21 March, 2014, 08:38:28 PM
Quote from: Trout on 21 March, 2014, 08:21:33 PM
I miss proper cars. These automatics (I've been here a year) kind of worry me. It all seems too easy

I'm in and out of different work vehicles all the time. The approach to the first junction on a journey in a manual shift after having been driving an automatic is marked by my either slamming on the anchors because I mistake the brake pedal for the clutch or forgetting to change gear and trying to pull away in third. Five minutes later, and you'd think I'd been driving automatics all my days, and it's the same the other way round.

My point is that most processes involved in driving are unconscious instinct, rather than deliberate thought. Radiator's observation that learning gear changing and footwork is just a distraction from paying attention to what's happening on the road is a good one. I think anyone passing their test in a manual would find acquiring the laughably rudimental skills involved in not stalling a car to be a piece of piss, once they're not being distracted by trying to rub their bellies and pat their heads at the same time.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 March, 2014, 10:31:33 PM
I've no idea if it was true, but it was well known that a particular examiner in Blackburn would always find a reason to fail anyone who turned up for the test in a school uniform - it was the "top tip" for 17 year olds.

Took me three tries - after two fails, my mum decided I'd had enough lessons and just needed practice, so I was her driver for the summer holidays as she did deliveries for my dad's printing business - third test was a breeze.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 22 March, 2014, 08:18:37 AM
Personally I think it's best to learn how to drive with manual gears. That way, once you've passed, you can drive anything, which makes it much easier in the future if you ever need to hire a car or van or want to get insured on someone else's car.
While the gears cab be a challenge at first they soon become second nature and something you don't really think about.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 March, 2014, 09:20:33 AM
Manual gears are a ridiculous impediment to learning to drive, largely because learning to use them takes focus away from what you should really be learning to do, which is drive safely - a whole different matter.  Ideally you should just feck about with gears in a deserted carpark/track/beach where you can't hurt anyone for a good long while, and then when you have the mechanics (which aren't hard to grasp when you're not simultaneously learning to manoeuvre a tonne or more of vehicle past suicidal humans and other impatient huge vehicles at speed), move onto learning to drive

However.  My brother and his wife who live in Oz learned on an automatic over there, and as a result aren't able to borrow our cars when he's home visiting.  The eyes of car-hire places light up whenever they arrive. 
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 March, 2014, 09:51:35 AM
Quote from: JamesC on 22 March, 2014, 08:18:37 AM
Personally I think it's best to learn how to drive with manual gears. That way, once you've passed, you can drive anything, which makes it much easier in the future if you ever need to hire a car or van or want to get insured on someone else's car.
While the gears cab be a challenge at first they soon become second nature and something you don't really think about.

I see what you're saying, but my point is that nowadays NO vehicle really needs to be manual.

While it does become second nature eventually, even experienced drivers will sometimes stall, and stalling during a test is a real pain - once you do it, it just chips away at your confidence. It just seems like an outdated technology to me.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 22 March, 2014, 10:21:03 AM
Quote from: radiator on 22 March, 2014, 09:51:35 AM
I see what you're saying, but my point is that nowadays NO vehicle really needs to be manual ... It just seems like an outdated technology to me

Every modern car has an annoying wee light on the rev counter that lights up, telling you whether to change up or down gears, which makes the business of giving you a manual gearbox to play with a nonsense. The future is definitely going in the direction you describe, and any hybrid vehicle I've been in has an automatic or dual shift. There's a generation of guys who think being able to change gear makes them hot shit, but they're all dying!

As Burdis points out, truckers - great big manly men with forearms like tree trunks, baldy heads and stubble like steel wool - all drive automatics, and the time when double clutching made driving a little more of a skill is long gone, so the idea that manual shifting has anything to do with machismo is baffling.

Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 22 March, 2014, 11:40:01 AM
Quote from: radiator on 22 March, 2014, 09:51:35 AM
Quote from: JamesC on 22 March, 2014, 08:18:37 AM
Personally I think it's best to learn how to drive with manual gears. That way, once you've passed, you can drive anything, which makes it much easier in the future if you ever need to hire a car or van or want to get insured on someone else's car.
While the gears cab be a challenge at first they soon become second nature and something you don't really think about.

I see what you're saying, but my point is that nowadays NO vehicle really needs to be manual.

While it does become second nature eventually, even experienced drivers will sometimes stall, and stalling during a test is a real pain - once you do it, it just chips away at your confidence. It just seems like an outdated technology to me.

I totally agree with you, no car needs a manual gear box but I think it'll be a good few years before automatic becomes the norm.

Apparently the guy who invented the type of manual gear box we currently use said something like 'That'll do until something better comes along'.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 March, 2014, 12:01:42 PM
Heh. I'm sure there was also a generation of writers who thought using a word processor over a typewriter was wussy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 22 March, 2014, 01:26:50 PM
Yeah, come and listen to me muttering about fuel consumption because my Nissan hasn't changed up a gear and tell me there's no need for a manual transmission. There's nothing macho about it. I just prefer having more control, especially in the snow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 22 March, 2014, 03:07:54 PM
Anecdotal evidence - I used to have an automatic, and when I swapped back to a manual, my fuel consumption plummeted. And you have much more control over speed and acceleration in a manual.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 22 March, 2014, 03:14:58 PM
Quote from: Trout on 22 March, 2014, 01:26:50 PM
Yeah, come and listen to me muttering about fuel consumption because my Nissan hasn't changed up a gear and tell me there's no need for a manual transmission. There's nothing macho about it. I just prefer having more control, especially in the snow

Dual shift is the way forward for you, neebs. If you're worried about fuel consumption in your Nissan Micra, you have my sympathy. If you're blaming the excess fuel consumption of your Nissan Pathfinder or Navara (with a set of moose bars on the front, and all your kids' toys as well as some old furniture you've been meaning to take to the cowp for ages sitting in the back) on the transmission ...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 22 March, 2014, 03:32:26 PM
Quote from: sauchie on 22 March, 2014, 03:14:58 PM
Quote from: Trout on 22 March, 2014, 01:26:50 PM
Yeah, come and listen to me muttering about fuel consumption because my Nissan hasn't changed up a gear and tell me there's no need for a manual transmission. There's nothing macho about it. I just prefer having more control, especially in the snow

Dual shift is the way forward for you, neebs. If you're worried about fuel consumption in your Nissan Micra, you have my sympathy. If you're blaming the excess fuel consumption of your Nissan Pathfinder or Navara (with a set of moose bars on the front, and all your kids' toys as well as some old furniture you've been meaning to take to the cowp for ages sitting in the back) on the transmission ...

I'm not worried. I just mutter. And I have three different settings on the transmission.

And the models are different here. I have a sensible Nissan Sentra. Only an idiot buys a small car in Ontario, because of the way insurance works here. You pay more in extra insurance payments (because you have less protection in a crash) than you save on fuel. It's better value to have a mid-range car, as my insurance broker explained patiently. It's a minefield.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 March, 2014, 03:34:58 PM
As I understand it (and this is just from a bit of online research), there used to be tangible advantages to manual but not so much these days.
Title: Re: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 22 March, 2014, 04:05:07 PM
Quote from: radiator on 22 March, 2014, 03:34:58 PM
As I understand it (and this is just from a bit of online research), there used to be tangible advantages to manual but not so much these days.

Automatics do seem a lot better than they used to be. With me, it's just a preference. I'm sure my opinion will change after I've driven an automatic for years.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 23 March, 2014, 02:06:24 AM
Quote from: sauchie on 22 March, 2014, 10:21:03 AM
...the idea that manual shifting has anything to do with machismo is baffling.

The prejudice against automatic-only drivers is a historical thing in the UK.

85-90% of the population have a manual licence and 84% of the cars on the road are manual.  Therefore, unless there's a physical disability involved, automatic-only drivers are presumed to be "crap at driving".  (Although I suspect that accident statistics probably show this belief to be erroneous.)

I'm guessing that in the USA, where automatics are more prevalent, it's only the petrol-heads (who favour fine control of their vehicle) who hold a similar prejudice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 23 March, 2014, 01:25:59 PM
I don't know how to drive. I've never had a lesson in my life and I've no interest in learning how to. To be honest, I'm dangerous enough on a bicycle and I get pedestrian rage when people - tourists and couples are the worst offenders! - block me on the footpath or slow me down with or their meandering pace. Plus, I have a chronic anxiety disorder and would probably go into a complete and utter neural meltdown behind the wheel of a car. And that's even before it starts moving, lol.

Tracy Walter in "Repo Man", gives about the best - if seriously whacky - reason for never learning how to drive in the clip link what-ya-ma-call-it below.

https://www.google.ie/webhp?source=search_app&gws_rd=cr&ei=Dd0uU8uuAo6ShgeQlIDwCw#q=repo+man+quotes+the+more+you+drive+video+clip+you+tube+
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 March, 2014, 03:51:30 PM
First day of a week away in Madeira and the missus breaks her toe pretty severely when exiting the pool....

so now its trussed up and she's not allowed to walk. or swim.

:o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 23 March, 2014, 04:14:11 PM
That's not what you need on ya hols. Get Geoff on the speed heal Owen. Hope it doesn't ruin the break.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 March, 2014, 10:23:01 PM
Small issue compared to broken toes, etc (actually I'd see that as a 'life spugs' issue)  but I got a cheque from my Dad for my birthday Thursday. Having no money in my account I needed it for a bit of ready cash. (Particularly as we've that 2000AD gathering next week.) Turned out I couldn't pay it into my account during lunch break Friday cos my colleague was off work that day (which I didn't find out until that morning).

Went out Saturday to put it into the bank pretty sure it closed at 4 or 5pm. Turned out it closed at 2. "Okay, a bit irritating, but I'll just put it into my account Monday during Lunch break", I thought.

Except now the cheque has gone missing. I was sure I left it in my jacket pocket inside my card but I can't find it in my bag or my room.  I could ask my Dad to write me another I guess (If the old one turned up I would destroy it. I'm trustworthy, honest!) but I'm kinda embarrassed so I guess I'll leave it.

Not to big a deal but realllllly irritating.  What an idiot I am.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 March, 2014, 10:42:09 PM
Sorry to hear of Geoffrey's toe-woes, CFM - that's a pretty crap way to spend your holliers.

Quote from: Mardroid on 23 March, 2014, 10:23:01 PMI could ask my Dad to write me another I guess (If the old one turned up I would destroy it. I'm trustworthy, honest!) but I'm kinda embarrassed so I guess I'll leave it.
Not to big a deal but realllllly irritating.  What an idiot I am.

I did this very thing many years ago.  My bachelor uncle, who was also my godfather, gave me a cheque for my 21st, a pretty substantial one by my standards then and my standards now come to think of it. He wasn't really given to presents normally, but I was specifically supposed to buy a suit with it and I took it as a pretty big deal coming from him.  I didn't want to lodge the cheque  until I had the suit lined up, because I knew I'd only waste it on food and rent and all that crap, so I put it somewhere safe.  And promptly forgot where.

When I finally found it, it was out of date and I was too embarrassed to do anything about it.  My father informed me a few months after that that my uncle had been quite upset to find the cheque was never cashed (and the suit never bought), and so I was yet again too embarrassed to say anything to him.  And I never did:  as in all good stories of this nature, he died suddenly not long after that, and I've felt utterly shite about it ever since.  Worse again, I was helping my Dad sort out his estate after he died, and we discovered he was broke: the sum he had tried to give me the previous year was pretty much all he had had in the bank.

Tell your Dad you misplaced the cheque, Mardroid. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 March, 2014, 10:58:15 PM
In my case the amount wasn't all that much. (I feel a bit guilty saying that, or even thinking it, since it's the thought that counts and he's had quite a bit of other expenditure  lately,  which is probably the reason. Plenty of other people get less I'm sure.) It's still a sizeable amount from a 'hand cash' point of view,  but I doubt he'll notice it hasn't been withdrawn. Although that's not really the point I guess.

I'll keep my eyes peeled for a bit anyway as there's a chance I just put it down somewhere and I'll come across it. I have had a look about but I'm one of those people who will do that one day... then suddenly find it the next day on the first look. I've a feeling this won't happen this time though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 23 March, 2014, 11:13:44 PM
Poor Geoffers. But it's a good chance to spend some quiet time together, CFM.

That cheque story is a real shame, but it makes me want to rant about British banks. I will say this, though: they're shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2014, 11:16:43 PM
Pobably best to come clean about the cheque and get it cancelled lest some nefarious character gets hold of it?


Sorry to hear about the toe as well. Ouchies.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 24 March, 2014, 04:13:14 AM
Ag. That's a pain Mardroid - I would say make him aware that you've lost the cheque but don't ask for another just say that you're keeping your eyes peeled (which you are) - then the ball's in his court! If he wants to write you another he can, but at the very least he knows about it!

In terms of Geoffery's toe - (and she's very grateful for the kind words!) things aren't looking nearly as bleak as we thought. There's a lot of walking-lite travel and a good transport network and she's fairly mobile on a set of crutches the hotel gave us so it's not a dead loss! She's just annoyed about the swimming - I've tried to convince her she can put a plastic bag over the bandages but she won't have it...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 24 March, 2014, 09:39:19 AM
RARE I AM HERE on this thread

new manager at work, first day NO FIRST THREE HOURS
upset the entire group in two locations,

no clue came in swinging with his how to make the world a better place,

leaving me to pick up the mess, and have to bring him to heal ASAP,
Two years since I took this role, lowest staff turnover in companies history, close to hitting budget, happy team, numbers on way up.
This prick walks in and thinks he knows better, rigellion hot shot his way first thing in the morning.
he was a transfer from another division, company policy you have to give them a chance, keep within the company rather then losing to another policy.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 April, 2014, 09:56:56 AM
I'm trying out my first pair of varifocals and I'm not enjoying it. I'm jerking my head round like a pigeon trying to find the right bit to look through for near/far vision. I'll give it a few days, but if things don't improve I'll be taking advantage of the 30 day trial and going back to regular reading specs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 April, 2014, 10:14:29 AM
I think I'm going to need glasses soon. Getting old, Grud damn it :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 April, 2014, 10:44:35 AM
Yeah, I didn't need anything till I hit my early 40s but since then my eyes are deteriorating at a shocking speed. Got so sick of constantly putting my reading specs on and taking them off that I went for varifocals, but they're weird.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 April, 2014, 11:09:27 AM
I'm sure you'll adapt, DDD - it's what us humans are good at - although that isn't a particularly jolly or helpful comment, I know, it's the best I can come up with!

My hearing also seems to be on its way out. Still, bright side, I suppose I'll be able to hang my hearing aids off my glasses.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 03 April, 2014, 11:17:29 AM
i have tried reading glasses (cheap shop bought ones) but found normal vision went haywire when taking them off after reading? is there a difference in cheapo's or expensive boots ones?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 April, 2014, 12:01:55 PM
A chilling, err, vision of the future of this forum...

We could always rebrand it as Last of the Summer Offensive, or maybe One Foot on the Belt.


(Quietly imagines Molch-R as Nora Batty)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 April, 2014, 01:09:08 PM
Went to watch Captain America 2 with an old school friend yesterday, we often go to the movies together to watch the films his missus doesn't want to see. The place was virtually empty but, sure enough, this couple sat right in front of us and he was chunnering, commenting and quipping to her all the way through the film. Ordinarily, neither my friend or I are shy about politely requesting folks like that to kindly shut the feck up - but these two were in their sixties or seventies. I simply couldn't find it in myself to be annoyed - in fact, I even caught myself smiling.

God grant that I'm still able to misbehave at that age!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 05 April, 2014, 03:30:04 PM
I have a sneeking suspicion that I have developed an allergy ...

But I have no idea what the trigger is.

My nose has always started to drip when ever i go outside... regardless of the prevailing weather or season...
(Which means no matter how bloody hard i try with make-up... I look a bloody mess)

But for the last couple of days my eyes have started to weep to.
I am not one of those people who are usually susceptible to allergies... but I can't think what else it could be or what could be causing it....


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 05 April, 2014, 03:59:10 PM
...hayfever Doc. People can develop it completely randomly! I didn't used to have it - then I had it horrifically and now I don't know when it'll start or how bad it'll be!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 April, 2014, 08:15:26 PM
I'm told that honey is very good for hayfever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 05 April, 2014, 08:25:31 PM
Also if it's not hayfever then it might be that pollution spike. My sinuses have been awful this week.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 05 April, 2014, 08:34:08 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 05 April, 2014, 08:15:26 PM
I'm told that honey is very good for hayfever.

Someone told me that the honey has to be from a local producer - so the plants that are causing the hay fever are the same ones that the bees have got the nectar from to make the honey.
That sounds like it could well be bollocks though!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 06 April, 2014, 04:37:57 AM
Quote from: The Doctor Alt 8 on 05 April, 2014, 03:30:04 PM
I have a sneeking suspicion that I have developed an allergy ...

It happens; whatever the specifics it's best described as hay fever.  Never had it until late 20s; suddenly got it one summer.  Been shite with it ever since.

Lived in the countryside for a few years and it got so bad at one point I got forced by my employer to go to a specialist.  Told him I'd been trying to cut back on the antihistamines (or whatever the pills contain nowadays) because I was taking them pretty much every day.  He said, "It's a trade-off between side-effects and what they're stopping.  If the symptoms are that bad every day then you need to take them every day.  Think of it like insulin."

I have found, though, that lack of sleep exacerbates it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 06 April, 2014, 08:44:12 AM
I used to suffer with it very badly as a child and nothing I took ever made much of a difference. I tried the local honey thing, my mum used to keep bees in our own back garden and the honey made no difference to my hayfever.

Mine has slowly started to go away since my late 30's, I just get the odd bearable sniffley day now. The only thing that ever really helped me in the past was having a room in the house where the doors and windows were strictly kept closed at all times and I could retreat in there to the lovely stale air and recover when I had a bad session. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 07 April, 2014, 11:02:12 AM
I popped into an old favourite pub on Friday to find it has been completely ruined.

The Lass O'Gowrie was always an odd and well-loved little pub - it used to have it's own brewery in the cellar (long gone), and the chap who was running it in recent years made it a real geek-haven: the snug was renamed in honour of Dez Skinn, the shelves running around the tops of the walls were full of daleks and stormtroopers rather than horse brasses, The smoking terrace was named "Vegas on Medlock" and opened by Johnny Vegas. They opened a small theatre space doing talks, plays and cabaret, including the Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre and even a revival of the Halo Jones stage play. I saw Al Ewing in a Q&A there and Al declared it one of the nicest pubs he'd ever known.

However when the BBC next door closed down and moved to Salford Quays, profits slumped and the brewery finally sacked the landlord and ordered a refit. The layout is roughly the same and they seem to have a decent stable of brews but the whole place has been done over in inoffensive Pub Cliche style - the shelves of old annuals, board games and Dr Who magazines have been replaced by those generic hardback books that are designed for show rather than reading, the pinball machine is gone and the theatre closed. Every trace of character and individuality has been ruthlessly eradicated and it's become a generic AnyPub.

:'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 April, 2014, 11:26:41 AM
A sad day indeed Dan. I've never been in the Lass O'Gowrie (a bit surprised about that after looking it up on the map) but it sounds like a great place. One of the things I really like about a visit to Manchester is that it has a really good mix of nice, natural seeming modern bars alongside really great, characterful old places like Peveril of the Peak and the Castle Hotel.

I shall pour a cold one out on the kerb tonight in solidarity with your loss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 07 April, 2014, 11:55:07 AM
Well that was a nice start to the week  :(.

A dopey lorry driver slammed into the back of my 6 month old car while I was in stationary traffic on the motorway (said his foot slipped of the peddle) and made a proper mess of my rear end (ooo err). One thing that really pissed me off is that I chose this car because it has some really advanced safety features, but None of the airbags deployed. At least one tried, the charge went off and filled the car with smoke but I just got a bunch of airbag error messages on the display instead. Not very useful.

And as if that wasn't bad enough, after limping home in a state of semi-shock, I failed to notice a pile of dog shit right outside my gate and proceeded to walk it through the kitchen, dining room and up the stairs before it finally petered out halfway down the landing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 07 April, 2014, 12:31:14 PM
The Lass sounded good, never knew about it sadly!

There is a pub I can never remember the name of that does good ales and has a copy of the Anthrax Dredd LP on the wall, loads of weird things all over the place including a penguin on the roof and other stuff. Opposite the co-op building I think?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 April, 2014, 12:33:04 PM
I recall many a fine evening spent in "The Lass" in the eighties and nineties*. Sad.



* yes, the innuendo is deliberate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 April, 2014, 12:34:04 PM
Bloody hell Rog, that was a morning.  Hope you get the car/carpet sorted sharpish, and glad to hear there were no injuries.

And sorry for your loss, DDD.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 April, 2014, 03:35:25 AM
I have a part-time driving job. This morning I got a call from the boss - urgent job broken out, one pallet of salad needs taking to a large Asda distribution centre over 200 miles away. Rush job. Asda desperate. Can I go, like now? Sure. So off I went.


Due to the M6 being nothing more than one almighty car park today because of road works and accidents all over the place I had to take an exceptionally silly and circuitous route. Took me five hours to do a trip that should have taken about three and I got there on time, which nobody expected. Good for me.


On arrival at this place I parked outside the security lodge and handed my paperwork to the Security Lady.


"I'm turning you away," she said, "you're not allowed on site."


"Why, what's up?" I asked, thinking they were maybe having a fire drill or a strike or a power failure or something.


"There's a dog in your cab," she said, pointing in case this situation had escaped my attention.


I agreed that this was indeed the case at which point she started to write "REFUSED ACCESS" all over my paperwork. I explained that my dog always comes with me and has never been refused access to any such place, including other Asda sites, and on the rare occasions when his presence has provoked comment it has only been to say how cute he is or to ensure he remains in the cab, which he always does.


She shrugged and handed me back my now defaced paperwork.


"Now, hang on a minute, there must be a way to..."


"No."


"Can't you look after him in here while I tip this one urgent pallet?"


"No."


"I'll give you a tenner if..."


"No. I work for Asda, not for you."


There were a couple of other guards in the Lodge so I offered them the same deal, suggesting that they could take an official break and earn themselves a tenner while I... But, suddenly, each of them found something exceptionally important and requiring their immediate and undivided attention on their computer monitors. The Security Lady smirked.


"Look," forcing calm, "this one pallet I have is supposed to be urgent. I've been bringing it for five hours." She shrugs. "It's just a dog - not a wolf or a terrorist or a bomb. He's not dangerous or disease-ridden or explosive." Another shrug.


Calmness oozing away.


"Okay - I noticed plenty of staff cars here - maybe we can find one of your workers who wants to earn a tenner on their break..."


"No."


"Those trees over there, if I secure him to one of those while I go in, you could maybe just keep an eye on him?"


"No." (And I did secretly thank her for that - it was a horrible option.)


Calmness now of the glacial persuasion.


"All this over a dog! A dog who'll stay LOCKED in the cab like he ALWAYS does! I bet you get wild cats all over this place all the time! Rabbits and pigeons and crows and hedgehogs - not to mention rats and mice!"


"No dogs."


I ask to see her supervisor in order to negotiate a one-time amnesty but she says that she has no supervisor. She is Queen of the Gate and I shall not pass. I can do nought but retreat.


I call my boss. The only thing he can suggest is driving up in his car to look after the dog while I go in to unload my one pallet. The drive will take him three or four hours. Jeez. But it's a plan, so I return to present it to Her Majesty.


"No. Be closed for deliveries by then." The news is displeasing, especially to the boss, who can envision this contract slipping away. I can do nothing but tell the Boss to leave it with me and retire from the field, driving away from the Gate House and searching for a plan.


The place is an industrial estate just off a new road. There's nothing about until I backtrack to the roundabout and spot a Travel Lodge. I wondered if they accepted pets and how much the rooms were. It was either that or ask some truck drivers parked up in a layby, which was another horrible option - not because I don't trust my fellow knights of the road but because they might have to leave before I could get back or something, birthing a situation that could become very awkward very quickly. So I drove towards the hotel.


Joy of joys! Behind the hotel, hidden by it, a spanking new housing estate and a woman walking two small dogs. So I stop the truck and explain my dilemma to her and ask her if she can help me.


"Yes."


I followed her to her house and left my dog - my Little Brother, my best friend, my only companion, my Chip - in the hands of a complete stranger. Pet owners will be able to imagine my feelings at this time.


The Queen of the Gate didn't believe my gall in coming back and reminded me of the ABSOLUTELY AND DEFINITELY POSITIVELY NO DOGS policy, whereupon I informed her that I'd found a decent human being to help me out. One of her minions was dispatched to search the cab, which he reported as dog-free. He didn't want to, bless him, but I made him look in the back as well - because Her Majesty would expect it. A stifled grin. In, tip, out - fifteen minutes. Twenty, tops. Maybe twenty five. As I pass out of the complex, past the same Gate House, I notice that Her Majesty is absent.


The lady who took my dog, whose name transpired to be Helen, said that Chip had comported himself honourably. She refused the tenner I insisted she have. Three times I offered and three times she refused. So thank you, Helen, for restoring my faith in humanity so soon after it had been shaken. May you live for as long as you want and not want for as long as you live.


And to the Asda Security Lady... well, what can I say? May you keep your job forever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 April, 2014, 07:50:27 AM
Ah, Jeez - that all sounds crazy but I'm glad it got sorted. There are too many people like Asda lady, and not nearly enough like Helen!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 April, 2014, 07:57:24 AM
That is one of the most ridiculous stories I have ever heard.  But beautifully told - if only That's Life was still going you'd have a gig there in no time. 

I assume she checked your cab for alcohol, drugs, porn etc. - I'd be fairly sure none of those are 'allowed on site' either.  Surely what's in a lorry cab is completely irrelevant to the hygiene/safety of a delivery.  If the concern is food safety, then presumably the exterior of the vehicle itself is more of an issue - how much shit, piss and vomit have the tyres rolled over?

Congratulations on keeping your head and finding a solution.  I've often driven for work with my dog in tow too and it has never been an issue (although I would never take him out on site), and I'm not sure I'd have lasted the course.  Although that said, the 'learning objective' I'm taking away from this is that there when you can find a random stranger on the street to help you out in a pinch, the good guys are still winning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 April, 2014, 08:20:28 AM
Quote from: TordelBack
I assume she checked your cab for alcohol, drugs, porn etc. - I'd be fairly sure none of those are 'allowed on site' either.

We're looking to rent a place at the moment, and I find it odd that some people stipulate no pets and leave it at that. This means that our harmless, soporific cat is banned – but that we are completely free to conduct our raucous and messy fortnightly Satanic virgin blood sacrifices.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 09 April, 2014, 09:57:52 AM
That just makes my blood boil, really. A complaint to the store manager from you or your boss, surely, is needed. I cant believe you kept so calm, idve "accidentally" run her over.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 09 April, 2014, 10:21:18 AM
I'm assuming pallets are quite heavy or I'd have dragged it out of the truck and dumped it on the road. friggin jobsworths
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 April, 2014, 10:26:40 AM
You should have gone back dressed as a dog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 April, 2014, 10:57:24 AM
Thanks all for your comments - I was beginning to wonder if I had been in the wrong, after all. Glad it's not just me who thinks the situation was rather foolish and also a little worrying. I was put in mind of that US university study, which I can't be bothered Googling the details about, where some students were invited to play "prisoners and guards." If memory serves, that study had to be prematurely cancelled because it turned all the "guards" into power-mad psychopaths.

The thing about dumping the pallet at the gate (which did cross my mind) or other such retaliatory action would result in my boss having his contract cancelled. Same thing if he or I make a complaint, these big supermarket chains are laws unto themselves and they'e more likely to cancel than engage. So you just have to bend over and take it.

In the final analysis, though, I agree with Tordels - the good guys are winning!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 09 April, 2014, 11:18:28 AM
Indeed Sharkie!
You'd think a 'the dog stays in the cab' would have ticked all the boxes for the Lady of gate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 April, 2014, 11:48:31 AM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 09 April, 2014, 11:18:28 AM
You'd think a 'the dog stays in the cab' would have ticked all the boxes for the Lady of gate.

Isn't technically the interior of a vehicle not "the site" anyway - this is why workmen don't have to wear full PPE when they're in the cabs of their diggers? I say this because I was on quite a strict worksite the other day (arms covered, gloves and goggles at all times etc) and I noticed the digger drivers would gleefully peel off their protective gear the minute they mounted the vehicle. Not totally. Nobody wants to see that.

So "no dogs on site" isn't relevant if the dog doesn't leave the vehicle. I'd be all like "yeah go in but if I see that dog out of the car I'll have your arse". I have no doubt, given the intricate unfurling structure of your story (you are a writer sir!) that it didn't exactly play out word-for-word like that but you (and Helen) have acted commendably there by not blowin' up and making things more difficult for your boss. PATIENCE +20 DOG SKILLS +20 ASDA BOTHERY +20 you've levelled up, Shark!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 April, 2014, 12:11:49 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 April, 2014, 11:48:31 AM
Isn't technically the interior of a vehicle not "the site" anyway - this is why workmen don't have to wear full PPE when they're in the cabs of their diggers?

I've written more than my fair share of HS&W Statements, and wasted countless hours on Safety Management courses, and you're certainly right about PPE.  However, PPE is a usually considered a 'Last Resort' element of Risk Assessment only applied as a Control Measure where hazards cannot otherwise be eliminated (and hazards to a driver that would require PPE don't exist when they are in the cab), and other site safety rules do apply to people in cabs: no headphones, no alcohol etc., so it's conceivable that ASDA's rules apply to the interior of vehicles too.  However, while talking on the phone while loading/unloading may have valid safety implications, I utterly fail to see how Being In Possession of A Loaded Dog does.  It's simply not a risky behaviour, for anyone, so by definition the risk assessment (if such it is) has not been competently compiled - too many rules are as dangerous as too few, the spurious ones distracting from the important. 

Far more serious matters for a food business would be Sharky ever having had a packet of peanuts in the cab and thus potentially transferring nut oils to the palette while unloading, but I'm guessing that one wasn't enforced.

Mind you, if they were screening for nuts Sharky would never have got in in the first place...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 April, 2014, 12:31:14 PM
Maybe not - but if they were screening for Balls it'd be a different matter...  Great punchline, Tordels. Wiping snot-coffee off my Kindle, you unutterable cad, you! :-D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 09 April, 2014, 12:32:17 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 April, 2014, 10:26:40 AM
You should have gone back dressed as a dog.
This genuinely made me laugh out loud.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 09 April, 2014, 01:55:27 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 09 April, 2014, 12:11:49 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 April, 2014, 11:48:31 AM
Isn't technically the interior of a vehicle not "the site" anyway - this is why workmen don't have to wear full PPE when they're in the cabs of their diggers?

I've written more than my fair share of HS&W Statements, and wasted countless hours on Safety Management courses, and you're certainly right about PPE.  However, PPE is a usually considered a 'Last Resort' element of Risk Assessment only applied as a Control Measure where hazards cannot otherwise be eliminated (and hazards to a driver that would require PPE don't exist when they are in the cab), and other site safety rules do apply to people in cabs: no headphones, no alcohol etc., so it's conceivable that ASDA's rules apply to the interior of vehicles too.  However, while talking on the phone while loading/unloading may have valid safety implications, I utterly fail to see how Being In Possession of A Loaded Dog does.  It's simply not a risky behaviour, for anyone, so by definition the risk assessment (if such it is) has not been competently compiled - too many rules are as dangerous as too few, the spurious ones distracting from the important. 

Far more serious matters for a food business would be Sharky ever having had a packet of peanuts in the cab and thus potentially transferring nut oils to the palette while unloading, but I'm guessing that one wasn't enforced.

Mind you, if they were screening for nuts Sharky would never have got in in the first place...

maybe it was the dog's nuts she objected too
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 09 April, 2014, 04:56:22 PM
I know it shouldn't Sharky but your story made me laugh... bitterly. I had no idea women could have Napoleon complexes as well.

I dub this woman Die Tür Führer Frau.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Recrewt on 09 April, 2014, 05:11:51 PM
Great story Sharky.  Unfortunately there are plenty of people around who just seem to want to make things harder for everyone else.  You handled it well and the ultimate snub to her is that you managed to find someone to look after the dog and still get the delivery done - that will have hurt her more than anything you could have said.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 09 April, 2014, 08:17:55 PM
Quote from: Banners on 09 April, 2014, 08:20:28 AM
We're looking to rent a place at the moment, and I find it odd that some people stipulate no pets and leave it at that. This means that our harmless, soporific cat is banned – but that we are completely free to conduct our raucous and messy fortnightly Satanic virgin blood sacrifices.

Yes, but that's because Satanists don't smell of cat pee.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 11 April, 2014, 02:25:45 PM
Why is is it necessary to constantly chase Solicitors and Estate Agents? It would be good if just once they managed to do something without me having to nag them. ~sigh~

(Perhaps it's because we're Satanists who smell of cat pee).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 April, 2014, 02:35:42 PM
Hit the books and do it yourself? In some of  the Classical societies, the attitude that only fools who couldn't manage their own affairs needed lawyers was not uncommon.

Today, I have been mostly watching an eight hour lecture about Common Law on YouTube. The power each of us has is almost incredible.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 11 April, 2014, 08:10:12 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 09 April, 2014, 08:17:55 PM
Quote from: Banners on 09 April, 2014, 08:20:28 AM
We're looking to rent a place at the moment, and I find it odd that some people stipulate no pets and leave it at that. This means that our harmless, soporific cat is banned – but that we are completely free to conduct our raucous and messy fortnightly Satanic virgin blood sacrifices.

Yes, but that's because Satanists don't smell of cat pee.

Yeah, but why do Marxists only drink green tea? 'cos proper tea is theft.



(Sorry)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 12 April, 2014, 02:00:39 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 09 April, 2014, 12:32:17 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 09 April, 2014, 10:26:40 AM
You should have gone back dressed as a dog.
This genuinely made me laugh out loud.
[/fquote]

Me too. The particularly the mental image of a guy in a dog suit driving the cab up to the gate...
Reminds me of a particular camera gag show broadcast a few years back that was always good for a laugh largely featuring people in animal costumes. The snail crossing the zebra crossing and the, and erm, 'exercising' rabbits spring to mind...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 April, 2014, 11:03:21 AM
Quote from: Banners on 11 April, 2014, 02:25:45 PM
Why is is it necessary to constantly chase Solicitors and Estate Agents? It would be good if just once they managed to do something without me having to nag them. ~sigh~

(Perhaps it's because we're Satanists who smell of cat pee).
Or anyone you need anything from.

I am chasing the NHS at Exeter as they have lost notes as to what anaesthetic nearly killed me in 08 .. Meaning  I have had to have a procedure I need cancelled as nobody wants to take the risk (least of all me).

Nobody will take responsibly, nobody will do a thing,  I've a feeling they simply didn't report it so that I couldn't claim against them had I actually complained at the time.  I wish I had now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 April, 2014, 07:39:17 PM
Poor Trout, he moves to Canada and I've just heard that they are ending door to door delivery over the next five years from their postal service!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 April, 2014, 08:29:24 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 April, 2014, 07:39:17 PM
Poor Trout, he moves to Canada and I've just heard that they are ending door to door delivery over the next five years from their postal service!

That was announced a couple of months ago. It doesn't affect us, or most people, because community mailboxes (with individual, lockable boxes) are commonly used. It's a two-minute walk to ours. My parents, for example, have lived here for 13 years and they've never had mail to their door.

I would have expected you to be in favour of cuts to public services, CF. The changes to Canada Post are a prominent policy by the Conservative federal government here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 April, 2014, 08:45:42 PM
Walking to collect your mail in rain and snow, how third world :lol:

As for cuts in public services, I've never been for that. People not obeying the rules and taking the piss, that's what I'm against.
In fact I've actually said a few times on here that I believe that with transportation, buses and trains should be free to the population, not people on holidays. Also sports centres and pools should be free, with a mass build program. Such things should be paid for out of general taxation but that's for the other thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 13 April, 2014, 08:52:24 PM
Ah, I see. I must have misunderstood.

And this is very much not like the third world.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 15 April, 2014, 03:40:18 AM
I remember holidaying in Vancouver (well a town outside to be precise) years ago.... * and trekking to a bunch of lockers on a street corner with our friends to collect their mail. A very well to do middle class area it was too.


*over 20 years come to think if. My, and does time fly.... and to think I'll be pushing 60 in another 20 years. That's scary.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 15 April, 2014, 07:14:10 AM
I have chicken pox  :(
For the second time in my life.
Feel like poo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 15 April, 2014, 11:47:01 AM
Well on the positive side, you are a genetic anomaly! You are part of an extremely rare subset of humans who are *lucky* enough to get chicken pox more than once. You are 8 times more special than the rest of us.

Hopefully you have gone to a doctor.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 April, 2014, 11:53:27 AM
you should go around deliberately infecting people you don't like, purely so that you'll have the opportunity to say "A pox on you, sir!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 15 April, 2014, 04:40:15 PM
Lol, thanks for that!
I have gone to a doctor. Was the shortest visit I've ever had.
Basically summed up to; "I'm really sorry. It's worse in adults. There is nothing I can do."

It's the spots inside my mouth that are annoying me most.

Ho-hum. On the plus side the beard is now coming along nicely (didn't shave for 5 days before and now won't be able to for a week or two...The Wife hates beards  ;))
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 15 April, 2014, 08:07:58 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 15 April, 2014, 07:14:10 AM
I have chicken pox  :(
For the second time in my life.
Feel like poo.

lightweight! my daughters had it four times before she was 8! ;)
aqueous cream did the trick non of that calamine rubbish.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 16 April, 2014, 10:16:06 AM
Apparently antivirals work but only in the early stages.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 April, 2014, 10:22:34 AM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 16 April, 2014, 10:16:06 AM
Apparently antivirals work but only in the early stages.

I think we should probably move directly to burning the bodies, just to be sure.


Chicken pox is a bloody pain, Matt, my sympathies.  Why we don't have a vaccination programme (like Oz does) I don't understand.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 16 April, 2014, 01:30:37 PM
Thanks Tordel.
Absolutely covered in the damn things now. Unfortunately my scalp and face are covered too.
Itching like mad, it's making even the most mundane of tasks a real struggle.

Could be worse, I suppose. Could have a nasty disease that could kill me. A week from now and I should be feeling back to where I was before...Just going to be a long week.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 18 April, 2014, 04:44:01 PM
I had chicken pox exactly 21 years ago, in the Easter holidays of my first year at uni. It was two weeks of absolute hell- lukewarm baths, calamine, spots inside my mouth and up my bum, constant itching and pain and tiredness. I have never recovered. Luckily my then-girlfriend stayed to look after me, everyone else having buggered off home for the break. I have never felt so ill, before or since. Get well soon!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 18 April, 2014, 06:23:00 PM
Ha, and here's me feeling sorry for myself because of a common cold. Get well soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 21 April, 2014, 11:04:45 AM
QuoteI have never recovered

:o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 21 April, 2014, 05:21:22 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 21 April, 2014, 11:04:45 AM
QuoteI have never recovered

:o
Yeah, not good news  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 April, 2014, 07:37:56 PM
Gulp!  You'd think the slug guts would have cured the spots up SBT's bum at least...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 21 April, 2014, 09:54:25 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, I was speaking metaphorically- those two weeks of arse and tongue hell I spent in a dirty Plymouth back street scarred me forever. And the chicken pox was unbearable too.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 24 April, 2014, 10:29:08 AM
My dad used to get shingles as an adult which I believe is a result of childhood chicken-pox. He was a bit unlucky to to get it so young as it mostly affects people over 50 but it was probably because he had such a hard childhood and his immunity wasn't so good. You don't really hear of people getting it nowadays...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 24 April, 2014, 10:55:10 AM
Joe of Adam n Joe got shingles (or even respected screenwriter and director Joe Cornish if that's what floats your boat).

Until that happened I thought it was like rickets or polio or what have you, consigned to the medical waste bin of history.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 26 April, 2014, 08:27:42 PM
I am just settling down to a nice Saturday evening of paperwork. Which is dull and tiring, but at least it's because I finish my job on Tuesday. At 1.00pm sharp.

Anyone want to go to the boozer on Tuesday lunchtime, just let me know!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 26 April, 2014, 09:54:14 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 24 April, 2014, 10:55:10 AM


Until that happened I thought it was like rickets or polio or what have you, consigned to the medical waste bin of history.

Not according to The Simpsons

(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mbprnlgKBR1ri7sxko1_500.jpg)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 26 April, 2014, 10:04:59 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 26 April, 2014, 08:27:42 PM
I am just settling down to a nice Saturday evening of paperwork. Which is dull and tiring, but at least it's because I finish my job on Tuesday. At 1.00pm sharp

Wow - I didn't realise there was a finite amount of work you had to do before you can quit. Now I know my entire career is job-and-finish, I think I'll just hang back late and batter through my allotted chores so I can retire before I'm 50.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 28 April, 2014, 08:03:07 PM
We just adopted a dog. The dog itself is absolutely wonderful - in every way the dog we have long dreamed of having - beautiful, perfectly behaved; gentle, great with people, children and other dogs, loving and loyal right off the bat.

However, over the weekend we began to notice she had an intermittent problem with her back right leg. She didn't appear to be in actual pain, more minor discomfort, and after examining her foot ourselves we figured that it was the result of one of her claws getting snagged or torn. But having had her looked over by a vet this morning it appears that it is something far more serious that will require expensive surgery to fix, or else it'll be a slow decline that would result in having to have her put down.

I'm obviously gutted, but ultimately we love this dog and are fortunate enough that we are able to cover the costs (unlike the majority of people who buy or adopt a big dog, we only did so prepared and ready for any eventuality). With any luck the surgery will be successful and she will have a good few years of happy life with us. Fingers crossed.

Of course, this begs the question of whether her previous owners knew about the seriousness of this injury before selling her to us, and my hunch is 'yes, of course they bloody did', and will plead ignorance.

All along, I was waiting for the other shoe to drop as I couldn't figure out why anyone would give up such a wonderful dog - even though they gave us a perfectly plausible story, something didn't quite add up. There's always going to be an element of trust involved in these situations. You live and learn. Pretty resolute now to just say 'fuck 'em' and do what needs to be done, though I may very well be sending them a rather strongly worded text message.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 April, 2014, 08:18:28 PM
Let it go. Don't sully your new found and loving relationship with anything so petty as recriminations. They didn't love this little soul but you do. Revel in that and don't look back, is my advice.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 28 April, 2014, 08:23:19 PM
Thanks Shark. You are of course correct - we are deliriously happy with the little pup, as she is with us.

I think I will work through my anger by drafting a few emails to them, then deleting them. I do hope that they can sleep well at night, though, and spend the money we handed over in good faith on something nice for themselves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 28 April, 2014, 08:31:13 PM
Should add, I slightly misunderstood the information my girlfriend relayed to me and thought the figure she gave me was in Sterling, not Dollars, so in fact the surgery is nowhere near as much as I thought!  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 April, 2014, 08:36:52 PM
Well, it won't get them much karma I suppose.

Me? I'm a bit of a romantic so I'd tell myself that the people who sold you the pup were in financial distress and knew they couldn't afford the vet bills so were forced to choose between having the little pup put to sleep or passing it on to someone who could afford to keep her alive. If they'd told everybody about the expensive problem, what chance would they have? If you choose to believe something like this you can see yourself as the selfless and philanthropic hero rather than the avenging angel. You can even tell the story that you figured this out from the start but played along to help the poor peasants keep their dignity.

Then, you shall be henceforth known as Sir Radiator, Protector of Beasts. At least in your own head...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 28 April, 2014, 08:48:48 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 April, 2014, 10:07:55 PM
Radiator, that's a right curate's egg.  Shark is dead right - rise above it.  Do whatever is best/feasible for your pet, and enjoy their company as they enjoy yours. 

We're watching our old fellow deteriorate before our eyes at the moment, a rescue dog who had a first year of life I couldn't even bring myself to describe here, but who has had 12 mutually great years with us to balance it out.  There's times I'd happily pulp the face of his previous owner (who was as a result banned for life from keeping any animal), particularly now our lad's mind is going and we can see him reverting to behaviours from his ghastly long-ago puppyhood, but to be honest we all got so much out of the deal that I should probably thank him instead.


And then kick the shit out of him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 30 April, 2014, 01:49:29 PM
That's a tricky bit of a situation there sir - but I hope you gain some comfort in the presence of the dog, who I'm sure is happy to have got a (more honest) owner!

Currently a little peeved at seeing some folk doing a "ooh look for one month I'm surviving only a few pounds a day - like the poorest in our society are - I'm saving money AND raising awareness" - cos currently - I AM having to survive on a few pounds a day. I just find that attitude kind of patronising - like all of the people on your friends list are also so privileged they'll find the "sacrifice" really inspiring instead of depressing. Fact is, if summat goes wrong in your house that month are you going to have to spend a week not eating to pay for it? Is the 'few pounds a day' going to also cover your rent? I think fucking not. All the awareness you've raised is that I'm now aware that you don't think before you type.

Sigh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 30 April, 2014, 05:14:12 PM
"Raising awareness". That has to be the most narcissistic form of charity there is. It's like they're assuming either you've never heard of poverty/mental health/cancer/whatever, or you just don't care. They take real things that real people actually have to struggle with and make it all about themselves.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 30 April, 2014, 05:22:23 PM
So the previous owners have refunded us the money we payed for the dog (which will cover about 20% of the surgery costs). My girlfriend takes them at face value and believes it was a genuine mistake, whereas I still half suspect that their guilty conscience got the better of them - I don't think it was a completely calculated move, but I do believe they suspected the injury was serious and it was an 'out of sight out of mind' situation - we know for a fact they didn't have her insured (am I a terrible cynical person?).

Doggie is due to go under the knife on Friday, and tbh the expense doesn't bother me at all. What does is that the poor little mite will be confined to the apartment for weeks so the leg can heal, to start with in a crate or cage so that she can't run around or jump. The complete recovery process will take four months. Feel so awful and the next few weeks especially will be really hard but it's all for the purpose of getting her fit and healthy again. There is also apparently a 50% chance that the other knee will go in the next 18months which would entail having to do it all again :(. Not the best start to owning my first dog.

Folks: INSURE YOUR PETS. And if you can't afford insurance, don't get a pet - especially a big dog.

We were already going to get her insured, but as this was an existing injury there was nothing we could do.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 30 April, 2014, 07:08:26 PM
Quote from: radiator on 30 April, 2014, 05:22:23 PM
We were already going to get her insured, but as this was an existing injury there was nothing we could do

... and that's the same way human health care works in the US. Health care in the USA is as fine as you'll find anywhere on Earth, but man do you * pay through the nose for it (http://www.bloomberg.com/visual-data/best-and-worst/most-efficient-health-care-countries), and god help you if you're unemployed, poorly paid, or have a pre-existing condition.


* your employer and their insurer
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 30 April, 2014, 07:32:44 PM
Tell me about it. Luckily we're covered. Great country and all that, but the US health care system is seriously messed up. Even if you buy the argument against universal healthcare (which I don't), surely you still end up paying the equivalent in insurance anyway?

In other minor impediment news, I've just realised that my home cinema system that I had shipped over from the UK is the wrong voltage (and I was sure that I checked, but there's so many things to do when you emigrate I guess I just forgot or misread it >:().

Has anyone got any experience of using a step-up transformer? Some people seem to say they're fine whereas others say they're always risky to use and can start a fire.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 April, 2014, 08:16:23 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 30 April, 2014, 01:49:29 PM
Currently a little peeved at seeing some folk doing a "ooh look for one month I'm surviving only a few pounds a day - like the poorest in our society are - I'm saving money AND raising awareness" - cos currently - I AM having to survive on a few pounds a day.

Jarvis Cocker should sue.

I'm sure it was ever thus, but over the last few years it's been brought home to me that a large chunk of society simply doesn't understand the reality of 'having no money'.

For 'them' not having enough money is always about making choices between saving (usually for something nice), or pensions, or 'treats', or brands/makes/sizes: never heat or food or phone. 

And here I go in my turn making it about me, but whenever I hear stories like this, I always think of an occasion two years back where I was invited to a dinner in a sports club, and politely declined, only to be barraged with assurances of the value, and the importance that everyone be there etc., and no-one seemed to be able to grasp that I did not have €40 and had no way whatsoever of getting €40, and even if I had had €40 there was no way on earth I was going to spend it on myself: my family's weekly food budget at that point was €37, and it was a bloody hard job making that work.  It wasn't as if they didn't know I was unemployed and in debt, I'd had to stop paying my club dues and attending events the previous year, it just seemed they couldn't grasp the idea that it was an impossible sum of money.

And when I finally gave in and firmly told them that there really was no way I could afford it, they started insisting that they'd pay for my dinner.  And at that point I knew they were very nice people, but they really didn't get it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 30 April, 2014, 08:46:24 PM
To be fair, I think it's closer to a single pound per day that they're living off for a month, but now that you mention it... (estimates own average weekly food budget on fingers)... Pfft.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 30 April, 2014, 09:42:56 PM
Well said TB (as always!) and yeah MIK I saw you'd liked it and yes I was exaggerating their mission a little but this line at the end is what really got to me:

"If you are feeling particularly brave you could even join us"

I wish I had the choice - !!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 01 May, 2014, 09:20:32 AM
I remember ex-Tory MP and now Times columnist Matthew Parris trying to survive on dole money for a week in the early '80s.  He couldn't do it.  But, even if he had have done, it would still have been nonsense.  It's not about surviving for a week, is it?

Down the town yesterday, saw a lad, probably in his mid-20s, busking, with a cardboard sign saying ex-Army.  Stopped to chat to him, turned out he used to be in my old regiment.  Said he'd left the Army in November and hadn't been able to find any work.  Walked away thinking the world's not fair.  But then, the devil's advocate in me thinks to himself, how do Eastern Europeans find jobs here if they don't exist?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 May, 2014, 10:01:41 AM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 01 May, 2014, 09:20:32 AMIt's not about surviving for a week, is it?

That's the thing alright - I know the initial Jobseekers in Ireland is better than in the UK, but it's possible to get by, even have some sort of a life*, for a few weeks, even a good few months: in that respect it serves its stated purpose, keeping you afloat while you find a new job.  Then if you don't... things start to wear out or kids start to grow, and you realise that you can't repair or replace your car, your computer, your phone, your shoes, their shoes, and suddenly having to find childcare or get the train to an interview becomes an insurmountable nightmare, and every upcoming birthday and Christmas a source of dread, every invite to the pub an agony of indecision. Everything is suddenly out your reach, even your friends.   

It's the gradual erosion of your capacity to act, to effect change in your life, the redirection of all your energies into trying to keep food on the table or somewhere to live, when what you should be doing is thinking hard and re-training and building networks and fixing things in your life.  Good luck doing that when you can't afford to keep credit on your phone.

And it's just about then they usually cut your benefits. 

It really is the long-haul that matters, not a week or even a year.


*In fact when I first became unemployed it was an incredible bounty, because as the business was struggling I'd been working without regular or any pay for nearly two years at that point: and here they were, giving me money every bloody week!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 01 May, 2014, 11:19:52 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 01 May, 2014, 10:01:41 AM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 01 May, 2014, 09:20:32 AMIt's not about surviving for a week, is it?

That's the thing alright - I know the initial Jobseekers in Ireland is better than in the UK, but it's possible to get by, even have some sort of a life*, for a few weeks, even a good few months: in that respect it serves its stated purpose, keeping you afloat while you find a new job.  Then if you don't... things start to wear out or kids start to grow, and you realise that you can't repair or replace your car, your computer, your phone, your shoes, their shoes, and suddenly having to find childcare or get the train to an interview becomes an insurmountable nightmare, and every upcoming birthday and Christmas a source of dread, every invite to the pub an agony of indecision. Everything is suddenly out your reach, even your friends.   

It's the gradual erosion of your capacity to act, to effect change in your life, the redirection of all your energies into trying to keep food on the table or somewhere to live, when what you should be doing is thinking hard and re-training and building networks and fixing things in your life.  Good luck doing that when you can't afford to keep credit on your phone.

And it's just about then they usually cut your benefits. 

It really is the long-haul that matters, not a week or even a year.


*In fact when I first became unemployed it was an incredible bounty, because as the business was struggling I'd been working without regular or any pay for nearly two years at that point: and here they were, giving me money every bloody week!

Well said sir! and its knowing that there is no end in sight, or perhaps there is but its two weeks away and then some fart starts moaning about how their 'savings' are 'only' getting 2%,  or you know you have the big stuff covered for the month but there's a meeting where Coffee is the same price as you planned to spend on the barin's tea...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 01 May, 2014, 04:52:00 PM
Was it Ian Duncan Smith trying to justify his £39 breakfasts?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 May, 2014, 03:11:11 PM
I had no work for three weeks last month and ended up having to go to a food bank.

It is humiating enough to have to approach a charity for food but, when I was told that I had to first obtain a voucher from some local "responsible person" I almost lost it. "I need permission to beg?!!" I blustered, with probably a couple more exclamation marks. My next sentence, which was to be along the lines of "f*ck that - I'll starve!", and with judt the single dignified exclamation mark, was never uttered as the nice lady with odd hair and lipstick on her teeth was apologising that this voucher system hadn't been set up yet and would I like a Hob-Nob?

She gave me a couple of bags of stuff anyway and then explained that you could only claim three times.

Now, I understand that there are people out there who might stoop to conning a charity out of food - but to treat everyone as a potential cheat just grates. You didn't hear Jesus saying, "here, lads - dish these loaves and fishes out to anybody with a voucher," did you? "Suffer the little children with vouchers come unto me." "Give those of us with vouchers this day our daily bread."

Bloody humiliating, so it is.

Back at work now, though, which means I can engage in the slightly less humiliating ritual of rooting through the Bargain Shelves at the Co-Op. (2 for 1 cheese today!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 02 May, 2014, 03:26:53 PM
QuoteHas anyone got any experience of using a step-up transformer? Some people seem to say they're fine whereas others say they're always risky to use and can start a fire.

We supply them at work the other way round, ie Step Down.

Things to watch out for, make sure the output voltage is the same as stated on the cinema unit and exceeds the stated wattage on you home cinema unit, its usually written on a little silver seal on the unit. So for example if the unit is 220v 50w (or may be written as 50VA) go for a 60 watt (or 60VA) output transformer.
All transformers have a small risk of fire, just make sure the one you buy is fused with the appropriate amp fuse and the the fuse is replaceable. Some of the cheaper units have a built in fuse, when that goes you will have to replace the whole unit. Whatever shop you buy it off will be able to advise you on the correct size etc, just bring the details of the cinema unit with you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 02 May, 2014, 05:52:52 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 May, 2014, 03:11:11 PM
I had no work for three weeks last month and ended up having to go to a food bank. It is humiliating enough to have to approach a charity for food but, when I was told that I had to first obtain a voucher from some local "responsible person" I almost lost it ... She gave me a couple of bags of stuff anyway and then explained that you could only claim three times. Now, I understand that there are people out there who might stoop to conning a charity out of food - but to treat everyone as a potential cheat just grates

They have to be on their guard, since the Man (or The Mail (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2608606/No-ID-no-checks-vouchers-sob-stories-The-truth-shock-food-bank-claims.html)) has it in for them at the moment - because reporting that charities act charitably proves that nobody is poor and starving in the UK and that everything's alright again. The nice lady who gave you your bags of grub without a voucher was probably praying inside that you weren't about to rush back to Fleet Street and publish details of your haul.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 May, 2014, 06:05:27 PM
Good point. Although it is a source of constant surprise and ongoing frustration to me that people continue to believe what these opinionpapers tell them. It's almost as if papers like the Mail, the Sun and all the rest of them were competing to see which one of them can get the most people at each others' throats...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 02 May, 2014, 10:10:49 PM
So, as I understand it, you can only go to a food bank three times.  It's not actually stopping people from starving, it's just postponing it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 03 May, 2014, 12:53:22 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 May, 2014, 06:05:27 PM
Good point. Although it is a source of constant surprise and ongoing frustration to me that people continue to believe what these opinionpapers tell them. It's almost as if papers like the Mail, the Sun and all the rest of them were competing to see which one of them can get the most people at each others' throats...

Thankfully it's not so true anymore.  The combined circulation of all UK national daily papers is roughly 8 million total -- a far cry from their heyday.  Despite their blustering they have very little influence anymore.  Most of my teenage students have never even looked at a newspaper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 May, 2014, 01:38:54 AM
Quote from: A.Cow on 03 May, 2014, 12:53:22 AM
Most of my teenage students have never even looked at a newspaper.

This makes me sad in so many ways
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 05 May, 2014, 01:59:43 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 May, 2014, 06:05:27 PM
Good point. Although it is a source of constant surprise and ongoing frustration to me that people continue to believe what these opinionpapers tell them. It's almost as if papers like the Mail, the Sun and all the rest of them were competing to see which one of them can get the most people at each others' throats...

as long as they are at each others throats they won't be attacking the real enemy
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 05 May, 2014, 02:25:09 PM
The kind of people who read the Mail already believe what the paper's saying and it isn't putting anyone at anyone else's throat, it's merely cheerleading prejudices to attract those who hold such views in the old-media version of clickbaiting, the vast majority of what they call "filler" articles being the old-media version of a content farm.
I don't think that anyone at all would have their mind changed by a hatchet piece in a newspaper with links to the Nazi party any more than I believe that a Mail reader who reads a Guardian article will suddenly stop hating black people and women - from what I can gather, if a Mail reader reads a Guardian article they're far more likely to camp out in the comments section of the paper's website repeatedly blaming the Guardian/Obama/liberals/America for whatever ills the article reports upon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 05 May, 2014, 02:31:05 PM
I visit the Guardian comments page daily for some light entertainment (never to comment). It is populated by some right wingnuts. The football comments are high comedy. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 May, 2014, 03:35:57 PM
Gah, my bloody overnight shift has been cancelled at 2 hours notice - and I've already spent the now-vanished money on a tent!  Foolish Tordelback, will you never learn!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 05 May, 2014, 03:38:28 PM
Bummer, dude! Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 May, 2014, 03:52:30 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 05 May, 2014, 03:38:28 PM
Bummer, dude! Z

Ennh, I'll just lose myself in some Buffy and then a therapeutic invoicing frenzy instead. Nothing says 'pay me NOW or I'll gut you like a Taun-taun' like e-mails sent late at night on a bank holiday.

As I type, my wife is waving an 8-year-old bottle of Autan Family midge repellent at me.  My luck could be in after all. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 05 May, 2014, 07:58:03 PM
My wife has agreed to help out with the local cub camp in a couple of weeks time which entails staying away for two nights. She hasn't twigged yet that it is my birthday weekend and for my pressie we had planned to go out and see Godzilla (a film event up there with Dredd or a new Star Wars flick for me) and go for a nice meal.

I haven't mentioned it because I don't want her to cancel helping the cubs as they always struggle for helpers. I am a bit annoyed though, not so much because I'm missing my night out but because when the penny does drop, her particular brand of female logic dictates that it will have been all my fault.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 05 May, 2014, 11:12:22 PM
today was my birthday but the only good thing to happen today is I had a day off from college I know I have at least 3 presents but the first one I wont see till saturday when me and some friends go see a film as a late extra birthday fun seeing as my friends had to work today the second present I wont see till next month and the last one I problay want see till setember. hell I did not even get a card or birthday cake today whats worses my mum so far has miss this birthday last birthday and x-mas presents saying see whill get me back dated presents some time :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 06 May, 2014, 06:56:51 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 05 May, 2014, 11:12:22 PM
today was my birthday but the only good thing to happen today is I had a day off from college I know I have at least 3 presents but the first one I wont see till saturday when me and some friends go see a film as a late extra birthday fun seeing as my friends had to work today the second present I wont see till next month and the last one I problay want see till setember. hell I did not even get a card or birthday cake today whats worses my mum so far has miss this birthday last birthday and x-mas presents saying see whill get me back dated presents some time :(

Just remember, GC still loves ya!

Oh and Happy Birthday. I would say have a good one but I suppose there is little chance of that happening huh. If it makes you feel any better you're not alone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 May, 2014, 07:48:06 AM
I did sweet fuck all for my 18th. I was in the middle of my own "great depression" so I shunned everyones attempts to make it a great ine. I regret this no end. Enjoy what you and your friends have got planned and make sure yu treasure it. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 May, 2014, 09:40:36 AM
Happy birthday, CL2K!  Try to focus on the good stuff to come, it's great that you have friends to go to the cinema with, and a mother who loves you, even if she's sloppy on punctuality. 

And remember when you get to my age birthday presents can consist of a large jar of marmite and a DVD to watch with the kids!

(Although that is what I asked for).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 06 May, 2014, 10:44:35 AM
My 21st was good or so I'm told.

I don't remember much after we arrived at the bar with the £2 cocktails. And my friends all bought me one... Next thing I know I'm in a strange room and it's morning time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 06 May, 2014, 12:18:25 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 06 May, 2014, 10:44:35 AM
Next thing I know I'm in a strange room and it's morning time.

Were there bars on the windows?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 06 May, 2014, 06:46:03 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 06 May, 2014, 09:40:36 AM
Happy birthday, CL2K!  Try to focus on the good stuff to come, it's great that you have friends to go to the cinema with, and a mother who loves you, even if she's sloppy on punctuality. 

And remember when you get to my age birthday presents can consist of a large jar of marmite and a DVD to watch with the kids!

(Although that is what I asked for).

well this Saturday were going to see eaither spiderman 2 or if its out godzilla will it be out by then

as for my mum lastr year I asked for a new digitial camara she said I had to name one as she cant find one that matchses what I want it for and as for the late x-mas present it will be a PS4 when she can find one for a good offer
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 07 May, 2014, 12:09:30 PM
My life is currently riddled with a series of minor impediments because: the internet.

Seriously. I arrived at the conclusion today that too much exposure to the WWW is doing bad things to my sanity.

I'm (hopefully) known for my tolerance levels, but I am literally just seeing so much stupid online right now that I actually dread logging into places like Facebook, as well as certain other corners of the internet. But not here. It's aces here.

What I'm talking about are the kind of asinine statements and arguments that seem to suggest the people posting them have full-on proper head problems. In their heads. Things that make me think 'how can anyone REALLY think that?'

Time for a brief retreat from netland, methinks.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 May, 2014, 12:25:56 PM
I gave up on Facebook and all that pap months ago and feel a lot better for it. This place is my Facebook now and the the rest of the web is just for communication, collaboration, research or the occasional tv show.

I found that if I didn't own the web, the web pwned me...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 07 May, 2014, 12:31:33 PM
My only bugbear is that Facebook et al are pretty important lines of communication with certain people. It's just become increasingly difficult to tune out the noise these last few weeks.

I shall deal with this as I do all minor crises. More beer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 07 May, 2014, 12:32:54 PM
The cricket team I play for is facing a complaint from the team we played on Saturday as they have reported us to the league. Haven't seen the exact details yet but seems they have complained about our standard of umpiring (not giving LBW decisions against our batsmen) and abuse of umpires. Sadly I think they may have some grounds for this but that isn't what's annoying me at present. I just don't need the hassle of having to deal with this when I've got a load on at work and home. I play cricket for fun and at the moment loads of things are happening that mean it's about as far away from that as possible and I'm getting to the point where I'm considering giving up playing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 07 May, 2014, 02:29:34 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 07 May, 2014, 12:25:56 PM
I gave up on Facebook and all that pap months ago and feel a lot better for it.

Completely. Few years back a college reunion was punctuated throughout by people taking photos. In my naivety I didn't even see the relevance of this to the 'net. Wondered about the sanity of a few in particular after befriending (ugh) them later.
Still waiting for the full Facebook backlash. But on it goes........
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 09 May, 2014, 02:15:11 PM
Today I have learned an important lesson:

    A car horn that plays "La Cucaracha" can be mildly annoying.

    A car horn that plays "La Cucaracha" can be more annoying if it's located at a garage within earshot of my window while I'm trying to do urgent paperwork.

    But that's nothing compared to someone trying to FIX a car horn that plays "La Cucaracha".  For most of the last HOUR.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 09 May, 2014, 02:58:44 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 09 May, 2014, 02:15:11 PM
Today I have learned an important lesson:

    A car horn that plays "La Cucaracha" can be mildly annoying.

    A car horn that plays "La Cucaracha" can be more annoying if it's located at a garage within earshot of my window while I'm trying to do urgent paperwork.

    But that's nothing compared to someone trying to FIX a car horn that plays "La Cucaracha".  For most of the last HOUR.

the cockroach (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOJHXDgIq9w)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 May, 2014, 04:12:33 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 09 May, 2014, 02:15:11 PM
    But that's nothing compared to someone trying to FIX a car horn that plays "La Cucaracha".  For most of the last HOUR.

Dear god.   :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 09 May, 2014, 04:38:22 PM
fix it with a hammer?  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 09 May, 2014, 05:34:45 PM
Drill bit stuck in our brand new drill. At least it got the bloody holes in the wall.

Very irritating as we only had to get this one because the old one couldn't keep hold of the bits in anything but wood... now we can't change the bit on the new one or get it back in the box.

I suspect in our cackhandedness we may have drilled the holes using the counter-clockwise setting. I didn't really think to check till we tried to put it away.

Any tips?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 May, 2014, 05:42:09 PM
Try forcing some cheese (preferably either Lancashire or Red Leicester) into the mechanism...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 May, 2014, 08:07:41 PM
Is it one of those newfangled keyless chucks that you just twist the housing against itself, Theblazeuk?  Bloody useless things, can't seem to get more than year out of one, and I don't use a drill that often.  Chances are something is squashed tight deep in there and needs to be persuaded to come loose.  If it's as recent a purchase as you indicate just bring it back - running it in reverse shouldn't do that, and sometimes you have to run in reverse: Not Fit For Purpose.

Otherwise, all I can suggest is what worked for me, which is to get yourself a gallon of WD40* and squirt it deep into the chuck, and leave it to soak for a good few hours: drown the bloody thing in the stuff.  Then get a pliers or a small wrench or clamp and waggle the drill bit back and forth fairly gently while holding or clamping the body of the drill firmly, all the time squirting more WD40 directly on to any gap you can make between the jaws and the bit and keep working it  (wear old clothes, there'll be WD40 everywhere).  If that isn't budging it, get a tack hammer and a flat-head screwdriver and try to open a gap without damaging the jaws themselves.  Once you get things moving, it should all come unstuck.

Obviously you run the serious risk of further fecking your drill and certainly voiding any warranty, so take care and don't blame me!



*Note: not a variety of cheese.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 May, 2014, 08:29:03 PM
It does amuse me that mankind can construct pyramids, skyscrapers and Mars rovers yet we still can't bore holes in a wall without ending up with a knackered cheap drill full of WD40 and cheese.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 09 May, 2014, 10:37:11 PM
Cheers Tordelback. I am seeing lots of recommendations for that so I may give it a go. I just dunno whether to try and faff around with the warranty and get a replacement - if it comes out easily then great! If its a pain in the arse and I do damage to the drill, what a waste.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 11 May, 2014, 10:51:39 AM
I cut my tongue this morning and it won't heal. Also had some hot stuff at lunch time that really really stung.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 11 May, 2014, 03:15:51 PM
Commiserations GC. Tongue pain is the worst. Okay a burn is probably the worst but that's up there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 12 May, 2014, 12:44:30 PM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 11 May, 2014, 10:51:39 AM
I cut my tongue this morning and it won't heal. Also had some hot stuff at lunch time that really really stung.

Cheese is the answer to parmapharse John Lennon
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 14 May, 2014, 12:00:28 AM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 12 May, 2014, 12:44:30 PM
Cheese is the answer to parmapharse John Lennon

If rock-star-related fromage is the solution, why not try Midge Ure cheddar?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 16 May, 2014, 04:57:12 PM
Where cheese or chocolate doesn't fix things, try WD40. Pretty good rule of life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 May, 2014, 08:29:40 PM
In aged-dinghy sailing, we use this widely-cited troubleshooting guide to good effect: if it moves and it shouldn't, use duct tape; if it doesn't move and it should, use WD40.  Keeps us afloat, mostly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 16 May, 2014, 10:06:43 PM
theres an anti epileptic drug called clonazepam that would make a damn fine alternative if not replacement to wd40 its very greasy a single drop goes a long way .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 May, 2014, 12:09:20 AM
Reminds me of an old army saying I was told about in my teens; "If it moves, salute it; if it doesn't move, paint it."

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 17 May, 2014, 01:41:38 AM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 09 April, 2014, 11:18:28 AM
Indeed Sharkie!
You'd think a 'the dog stays in the cab' would have ticked all the boxes for the Lady of gate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 May, 2014, 03:46:35 PM
Nothing endears you more in the eyes of a client than a string of e-mails saying:

"sorry this is late, been ill - here we go!"

"whoops - sent you the wrong file there it is!"

"AH. Sorry -no THIS is the right file! Sorry again, sorry."

What an unprofessional pillock. Unfortunately this was me today  :-X

I always thought I looked more like the "how not to do things" guy than the other one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 23 May, 2014, 04:56:23 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 May, 2014, 03:46:35 PM
I always thought I looked more like the "how not to do things" guy than the other one

I hate the How To Do Things Guy, with his sensible haircut, polo shirt and pressed GAP khakis. You're better off with wonky bookcases and a TV with functions you have no idea how to use than turning into that smug cunt.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 May, 2014, 06:03:27 PM
Well, my new temporary accommodation is nowhere near big enough to store a tenth of my stuff. Most of my books and my entire comic collection will have to find a new home in a friend's loft and just about 90% of everything else will just have to go.
.
On the plus side, my new temporary place has a great view and is in a quiet rural area.
.
On the ultra plus side, it's a narrow boat. Her name? "Nirvana". The Shark is finally living on the water and, you know what, I'm excited! I'll post some pics when I can.
.
Now all I need is a little job and I'm back on my feet again, all I need's about £100 a week and I'm golden. This feels every inch like it  could be a great opportunity...
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 May, 2014, 06:37:07 PM
Nice one, Shark!  Good to see you're keeping on swimming.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 May, 2014, 07:20:06 PM
Come sail Nirvana down Bristol way, it'd be a magical journey - ! And you could write a book about it called "THERE'S A SHARK IN THE CANAL!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 23 May, 2014, 07:21:51 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 23 May, 2014, 07:20:06 PM
Come sail Nirvana down Bristol way, it'd be a magical journey - ! And you could write a book about it called "THERE'S A SHARK IN THE CANAL!"

There's a sitcom in it, too. Nice one, the Shark!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 May, 2014, 07:29:18 PM
Thanks, Tordels :-)
.
I'm wondering now about flogging my Twoothies and Megs to finance my wanderings (a great way to meet fellow Squaxx like Foxy and Trout, and what a way to do the conventions!). The first 100 2000ADs are a bit poor but the rest are okay.
.
Jeez - never thought I'd say that. How the world turns, eh?
.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 23 May, 2014, 08:05:51 PM
If you get lost and find you've sailed to the coast of New Zealand look me up!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 May, 2014, 08:28:22 PM
Heh, might take a while at 7mph!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 23 May, 2014, 10:20:22 PM
Oh, the Crinan canal for me...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 24 May, 2014, 01:39:01 AM
TLS tossing progs 1, 2.. there goes 3... over his shoulder nonchalantly as he passes each UK convention in turn, on his canal boat... glorious.

Cosh's Crinan Canal just gave me a pang of nostalgia (ouch!).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 24 May, 2014, 02:10:08 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 May, 2014, 07:29:18 PM
I'm wondering now about flogging my Twoothies and Megs to finance my wanderings (a great way to meet fellow Squaxx like Foxy and Trout, and what a way to do the conventions!).

I think for Trout you'll need to flog more than progs as the man is now near full Ontarian. However the rail prices as they are a bird to Maple-leafland is probably the same as a train to the cider city....

You're always welcome here though for what it's worth - ! Come say hullo at Thought Bubble!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 May, 2014, 01:56:45 PM
today I was expecting to recive a customs fee card from royal mail but know how my post man likes to troll me I thort the would delivere it 5 minits arfter the office shuts like they usichily do on a bank holiday week end o no I was luck customs atachily missed my parcel so no fees this would have been great except the royal mail Ninja was delivereing today I call them that as I have no sine that they had been except a fing card saying they were unable to delevere my parcel if thats not bad enouth I'm pretty sure they have lost 5 of my other parcels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 24 May, 2014, 03:19:00 PM
Some post offices (or some posties...) really do just post the red letter through the box rather than make any attempt to post the parcel. It was particularly bad in Portsmouth and has happened a few times in London but never once in Rochdale.

If it wasn't for the fact you could see the letterbox from the bathroom or the kitchen I'd just have said I was being cynical, but I've had to go out and get the parcel before they drove off a few times. Response every time you ask why they didn't actually try the doorbell or knock = "I did". Short of just saying they are liars what can you do eh....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 May, 2014, 06:43:36 PM
This night shift malarkey is starting to get me down.  I've been told I'm needed every weekend for a month now, and it seems only 50% of the shifts actually happen - and it's usually cancelled at an hour or two's notice.  So I'm sitting there at 1am of a Saturday morn, hyped up on coffee since I'll be on from 2 'til lunchtime, loading my gear into the car in the rain, and bam I'm cancelled.  And fat chance of getting a night's sleep.

Then tonight I'm doing a short shift which is supposed to be 2100-0300, which means my whole night is screwed but I only get 6 hour's pay, and when I finally get in touch with the guy I'm subbing for he tells me I could actually be on til midday depending- which is grand, but I had plans for tomorrow, but do I cancel them now or wait and see?

Then he tells me I'm covering a sensitive area and they haven't worked there before, but there are no on-call assistants or supervisors so I'll have to deal with anything and everything that comes up myself: and it's a city-centre road crossing, so it all has to be done and backfilled in the one shift. 'S a bit much.

I'm moaning again, and I in fairness I took this gig because the money is good, I can keep working on my other less-profitable projects, there's no childcare costs, and my new business badly needs an infusion of cash, but it's becoming obvious why these shifts are going a-begging in the first place and why they're prepared to pay so well, and I'm starting to wonder whether the toll its taking is actually worth it.

I know more than a few people here work night shifts for years, and since I'm still looking after the kids most days I am used to doing much of my work over night, but it's the uncertainty and irregularity of this setup that are killing me.  One time its 0200-1200, then it's 1700-0500, then its 2100 to 0300.... and just as often it's go back to bed, nothing happening.  How do experienced hands usually handle these things?  Interested to know any tips
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 May, 2014, 08:12:28 PM
Tordelback, whiskey helps (mind you, make sure it's good sippin whiskey; not gulpin whiskey).
Sharky: sharks, like all cursive hunters, are meant  to wander. Roam free my pelagic roaming selachimporphic friend. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 May, 2014, 08:23:08 PM
Oh and Shark, don't act precipitously, store your progs with a friend. Times won't always be as they are now. You'll have better days buddy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 24 May, 2014, 08:28:25 PM
That must be playing merry hell with your body clock there TB I don't envy you - zero hour type deals are annoying as it is without that random night-hour element flung in there as well - around about half three I tend to start getting the weirdies and flipping out so I'd be terrible at that kind of job!

...isn't oor Burdis a long-term nightman?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 24 May, 2014, 09:04:31 PM

I don't know how much practical help it will be, but a sympathetic academic study of how different social groupings handle night work (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b043xl9k) should help pass the time waiting in the cold and dark to hear your services aren't needed tonight. I've only ever done a handful of night shifts, and I just wanted to crawl into a corner and go to sleep by about 3AM.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 May, 2014, 09:11:47 PM
Start charging them for the inconvenience - fifty quid a pop should start dissuading them from thinking they can faff you about with impunity.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 May, 2014, 10:26:34 PM
as if my day could not get any worses I get this email 4 hours arfter they posted my order god dam it it was one of the 2 main points for this stupid order this shop is a mence if you dont spend 5000 yen they charge you 500 yen so I would problay have passed except they had 2 items I really wanted and this was one of them.


on a side note sorie to here about that TordelBack I know how haveing your sleep patten scrued with and really mess you up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 24 May, 2014, 11:05:23 PM
Tordels, I did nights for seven years and I learned one important thing: they're shit. The childcare thing does help, but it's outweighed by so many other aspects that fuck up your life. Zombification.

The answer is to tough it out if you need to, but keep an eye out for other things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 May, 2014, 12:16:09 AM
I love working nights - they were always my favourite shifts. I found that the secret is to simply treat night like day. That means that if I finish work at 6am I treat it like finishing at 6pm and don't go to bed as soon as I get home but wait 4 or 5 hours, treating noon as midnight. This approach works very well for me - but then I'm single and don't have a family to work around.
.
However, if your starting times are erratic then this approach might not work as well as it does for more standard working hours. If you could swing only working nights, or being on call only during nights then I'd certainly urge you to give this a try.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 May, 2014, 10:13:11 AM
Interesting stuff, thanks guys.  Yeah, it's the irregularity I'm finding the main problem - I try to do Shark's thing of staying awake until a more appropriate hour (read: when the kids go to school or the wife gets home from work), although it isn't easy, especially with the midday finishes, which I find the really brutal ones.  And alas, I've only got the contract because I'm reliable and flexible, so I can't start laying down the law - they need me when they need me. 

I generally do enjoy working at night, and the people-watching opportunities on this one are truly unbeatable.  There's been everything from running battles to regular offers of a snog (accepted, but not by me) to mass-singalongs to ladies who have conspicuously misplaced their undergarments, and last night alone I was hit by (a). half a hamburger (McDonalds); (b). a empty bottle of lucozade; (c). a full milkshake (Supermacs). Only the latter was uncomfortable, but there's me, a foreman an engineer and about 6 services guys, and it's quite amusing to watch everyone gradually retreat from the perimeter of the fenced-off area towards the very centre to huddle in around the machines as the clock ticks past 2.30am and the worst of the human wreckage hits the streets.  And if I have to hear 'dig that hole, bud!' one more time...

I think the main thing is that on all my previous over-night gigs I was in control - and I was taking a salary, so I knew what was coming up, covered what needed covering without thinking about overtime or whatever, and if it suited I scheduled other people. Being at someone else's beck and call, even while I'm self-employed, is very different.

But. The job is finite, and the money is too good to pass up (last night I passed some dull moments ca. 4.30am calculating that after likely taxes, and pretending the money shouldn't be spent on pressing bills or re-investmd in my business, I had earned enough for day-tickets to Eurodisney for the family, which does rather perk one up).  The reality is that I'm not six months into this new venture, and I spend so much of my time trying to sell myself and develop good relationships with clients that there just aren't enough billable hours to come close to making ends meet - so this kind of sub-contract that allows me to keep doing that and provides a (random) income is perfect.

I also love working - it's a delicious sensation to feel useful, to the family, the discipline (-choke-) and even to the client.  I just wish I didn't feel like the living dead when I do get a few shifts, or like a frustrated schmuck when I don't.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 26 May, 2014, 11:21:55 AM
Yesterday afternoon I sat watching my Daughter spend a couple of hours excitedly decorating an elaborate box for the tooth fairy to collect her freshly lost tooth from.

The tooth fairy got a little distracted last night and forgot to come.

I am a horrible parent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 May, 2014, 08:33:45 PM
Blame the new EU Enamel Regulations...




Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 28 May, 2014, 07:29:11 PM
Bah. Number one son took tea out of the oven and switched it off without realising our tea was still cooking.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 31 May, 2014, 03:47:56 AM
Gave a meter reading to our electricity supplier when we left the UK, and they have sent us a final bill for over £760.

Apparently we've been paying estimated bills for the last two years, but still - f**king hell!  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 31 May, 2014, 09:20:36 AM
Quote from: radiator on 31 May, 2014, 03:47:56 AM
Gave a meter reading to our electricity supplier when we left the UK, and they have sent us a final bill for over £760.

Challenge it.

1) It's their fault, not yours, that your meter hasn't been read.

2) They frequently make these numbers up. We're currently in dispute with nPower, who claim we owe them £410 for six months' electricity on a house which was unoccupied with the gas and electric switched off at the main, a fact which they had been notified of repeatedly.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 31 May, 2014, 09:21:47 AM
Quote from: radiator on 31 May, 2014, 03:47:56 AM
Gave a meter reading to our electricity supplier when we left the UK, and they have sent us a final bill for over £760.

Apparently we've been paying estimated bills for the last two years, but still - f**king hell!  >:(

Same thing happened to me a couple of years back when I switched from British Gas, had to split the payments which ended up cancelling out the saving I thought I was making through switching :(.

My impediment today was coming down this morning to find that the box for the pair of shoes that I need to return has been converted into a luxury apartment for Moshi Monsters.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 May, 2014, 09:40:01 AM
And the same thing happened to us, to the tune of €500 - which they took out by direct debit without warning, genuinely leaving us with no money for food or fuel for two weeks. I nearly vomited right there on the spot.  We checked the sums and they were right, and obviously we should have been submitting readings - it was the arrogance of assuming they could just take the money that annoyed. The irksome part is that or meter is on the outside wall, like everyone else in the estate, so they could have checked it any time, but left it for almost two years and then insta-charged us.

I'd like to take this opportunity to add a minor impediment:  we've been to-and-fro with the Bank for two years over mortgage arrears, most recently diverting legal action into a 'resolution process' which has somehow taken 6 months now.  The end of what I am assured is a deeply sophisticated system requiring us to submit documentation for every item of our extravagant lifestyle before arriving at realistic assessment of our capacity for sustainable repayment was to come back with a monthly figure €100 higher than what we had previously been unable to pay

And the dire claim that if we failed to agree to this 'restructured payment' within 20 days the 'protections of the arrears resolution process will no longer apply'.  These are the 'protections' that would see us paying more than previously.

So it's back to fightin' and feudin' with them, secure in the knowledge that a panel of financial experts on €100K can't add.  At least I'm so used to this by now that it fails to stress me any more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 May, 2014, 10:22:09 AM
Tell them to show you the contract - no contract, no payment. Be aware - an agreement is not the same as a contract which must be a) voluntary b) contain reasonable expectations and c) be SIGNED BY BOTH PARTIES. If they don't show you the contract (which they can't because there isn't one) then you start billing them for every letter they expect you to read. £100 a letter should soon clear your 'debt'.
.
Ask your bank to show you your mortgage agreement - you may find that they've sold it, thereby technically cancelling the mortgage.
.
Don't just bend over for these bastards - and don't play their game. You have more power than you know.
.
Your first port of call should be www.getoutofdebtfree.org
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 31 May, 2014, 10:53:09 AM
We recently had a bill from the hapless nPower (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-27374580) saying they owed us over £2,000. Needless to say, when I thanked them kindly and asked for a cheque, they refused to honour it.

Maybe we should all be so dismissive when we owe them.

TordelBack should be put in charge of these kinds of things...!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 31 May, 2014, 11:04:23 AM
 We'd all pay by standing order into the TordelBank. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 31 May, 2014, 11:13:20 AM
Quote from: Banners on 31 May, 2014, 10:53:09 AM
We recently had a bill from the hapless nPower (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-27374580) saying they owed us over £2,000. Needless to say, when I thanked them kindly and asked for a cheque, they refused to honour it.

We had a hell of a time extracting a £600 refund out of them — this on the same empty property they now say we owe £410 on. They stalled for so long it rolled over into a different 'billing period' enabling them to then say they wanted to take their own reading, requiring us to take time off work to travel to the empty property. They wouldn't be more specific than 'morning' or 'afternoon' which meant spending half a day in a house with no electricity or running water. Only for them not to show up the first time.

What larks!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 02 June, 2014, 09:19:53 AM
Paling into insignificance next to the above monetary horrors, but we've just finished our complete binge on 'Rupaul's Drag Race' on Netflix (series one to five), and are now left without evenings spent in the company of brilliant drag queens, glam costumes and catchy catch phrases, not to mention the music of Rupaul herself. Oh Michelle Visage and Santino, I will miss you. Series six has already aired on gay channel Logo in the states, but no sign of it over here on Netflix as yet, which is irritating. Neither have they seemed to pick up the spin-off series 'Rupaul's Drag U', which ran for three seasons from 2010. Bah!

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 02 June, 2014, 07:06:59 PM
...i'm being made to wear a uniform! :'( :'( :'(

navy blue trousers :thumbsdown: or combats :-\
and a "metro blue" polo shirt :sick:

   I am also going to have to fork out for a new pair of sensible shoes/boots.

its annoying 'cos they always promoted non uniform in the community stting I work in with special needs kids as it was deemed more comforting for the kids ie:not a scary uniform .

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 02 June, 2014, 07:14:58 PM
QuoteChallenge it.

1) It's their fault, not yours, that your meter hasn't been read.

2) They frequently make these numbers up. We're currently in dispute with nPower, who claim we owe them £410 for six months' electricity on a house which was unoccupied with the gas and electric switched off at the main, a fact which they had been notified of repeatedly.

Cheers

Jim

Hmm. Yeah, but to be fair on them at least, I do dimly recall getting various letters over the last couple of years saying that they wanted to come and read our meter, but who has the bloody time to organise that, right? We're busy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 02 June, 2014, 07:17:43 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 02 June, 2014, 07:06:59 PM
...i'm being made to wear a uniform! navy blue combats and a "metro blue" navy blue polo shirt. I am also going to have to fork out for a new pair of sensible shoes/boots

We can never go to the same party, or we'll look like twins. I resisted being used as a living corporate billboard for years. It's a lot easier to skive off and do your shopping on work time without your employers name embroidered above your left tit, and I liked being able to meet up with friends or go to see a film or a gig after work without folk mistaking me for a member of staff.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 June, 2014, 07:48:28 PM
Currently hiding upstairs from the wife.

She got changed earlier into a purple top and when she came downstairs my daughter shouted "Look out, it's Lumpy Space Princess" (non Adventure Time watchers will have to google it).

Cue 5 minutes of hysterical laughter from me and the kids and the wife in a huff for the rest of the evening, not to mention a new top that she will never wear again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 June, 2014, 08:04:57 PM
A client who evidently is now employing a new graphic designer, has just asked me to send all their assets across. The professional thing is to politely acquiesce, but I really just want to say "bollocks".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 02 June, 2014, 10:10:29 PM
..because I'm getting married (that's not why life spugs).

I'm getting married, and the religious considerations of this corner of Europe mean it's very difficult to look forward to it.

Family, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 02 June, 2014, 10:21:16 PM
Quote from: Mister Pops on 02 June, 2014, 10:10:29 PM
I'm getting married, and the religious considerations of this corner of Europe mean it's very difficult to look forward to it. Family, eh?

YOU'RE getting married (http://www.cheapflights.co.uk/flights/Las-Vegas/Belfast-International/), neebs

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 June, 2014, 10:51:28 PM
Had to clear my flat out today. As I'm a "Health & Safety risk" I had to ask some friends to do it for me while I stayed at a friend's house sorting stuff as it came, storing stuff in their leaky shed.
.
"The most important thing," I said, "is the small collection of comics containing my work AND THE BLUE TUBE CONTAINING AN ORIGINAL PAGE OF STRONTIUM DOG ARTWORK GIVEN TO ME BY CARLOS EZQUERRA. Please make sure you get this.
.
My friend located this precious stuff, put it to one side so he wouldn't forget it - then forgot it.
.
Now I have to go begging back to SJ for further access.
.
AAAAAAAARRRRGH!
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 03 June, 2014, 12:13:47 AM
QuoteAAAAAAAARRRRGH!

AAAAAAAARRRRGH!

QuoteI'm getting married, and the religious considerations of this corner of Europe mean it's very difficult to look forward to it. Family, eh?

Congrats Pops, I love weddings, all you can do is focus on the two of ye, enjoy the day. Our 14th anniversary is in two days!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 03 June, 2014, 03:13:58 AM
Quote from: maryanddavid on 03 June, 2014, 12:13:47 AM
QuoteAAAAAAAARRRRGH!

AAAAAAAARRRRGH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 June, 2014, 07:28:10 AM
Quote from: Trout on 03 June, 2014, 03:13:58 AM
Quote from: maryanddavid on 03 June, 2014, 12:13:47 AM
QuoteAAAAAAAARRRRGH!

AAAAAAAARRRRGH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

DIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOO!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 03 June, 2014, 05:59:53 PM
I have the week off work and my girlfriend is sick. So there go my plans.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 03 June, 2014, 06:12:26 PM
Quote from: lord sauchie on 02 June, 2014, 07:17:43 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 02 June, 2014, 07:06:59 PM
...i'm being made to wear a uniform! navy blue combats and a "metro blue" navy blue polo shirt. I am also going to have to fork out for a new pair of sensible shoes/boots

We can never go to the same party, or we'll look like twins. I resisted being used as a living corporate billboard for years. It's a lot easier to skive off and do your shopping on work time without your employers name embroidered above your left tit, and I liked being able to meet up with friends or go to see a film or a gig after work without folk mistaking me for a member of staff.

plus,the left tit logo will be an NHS one I have to be on my best behaviour going to and coming home from work! :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 June, 2014, 06:32:12 PM
Charge your bosses for the advertising space or cover the logo with black tape when you leave the compound, er, I mean workplace...
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 June, 2014, 07:18:25 PM
For anyone who was worried, I have been reunited with my Carlos Ezquerra page!!!
.
YAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOO-MOMMA!!!!
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 06 June, 2014, 12:43:19 AM
YAAAAAAAAAAAAS!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 June, 2014, 06:57:00 AM
I'm now imagining a recovery op resembling one of the endless Allo' Allo'  episodes involving The Fallen Madonna With The Big Etc., no prizes for guessing who's standing in for Herr Flick.

Very glad to hear that you got the page back safely, Shark.

(Shark is Maria, obviously).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: amines2058 on 06 June, 2014, 07:43:13 AM
Aaaargh my 7 and a half month pregnant wife managed to fall down some steps whilst hanging out the washing. Bump is fine but she has either sprained fractured or twisted her ankle! (Chose not to xray due to potential risks to bump) she is now all strapped up and laid up for an unknown amount of time whilst that heals.
I think I may be busy for the next few weeks!!  :'( :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 June, 2014, 07:50:49 AM
Quote from: amines2058 on 06 June, 2014, 07:43:13 AM
Aaaargh my 7 and a half month pregnant wife managed to fall down some steps whilst hanging out the washing. Bump is fine but she has either sprained fractured or twisted her ankle!

Oh gawds I remember those pregnant falls - mine fell down the stairs twice (honest, your Honour) and slipped badly on ice, it was all horribly worrying - but at least she escaped actual injury.  Not a good time in your lives to be laid up - my sympathies to MuzzAmines2058 and yourself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 June, 2014, 08:43:36 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 06 June, 2014, 06:57:00 AM
I'm now imagining a recovery op resembling one of the endless Allo' Allo'  episodes involving The Fallen Madonna With The Big Etc., no prizes for guessing who's standing in for Herr Flick.

Very glad to hear that you got the page back safely, Shark.

(Shark is Maria, obviously).

Never has the forum wide use of GGGGGGGRENNIE been more appropriate.

And horribly sorry to hear about tour missus amines, hope she recovers from the shock (which i'm sure is worse than the actual impact) soon enough.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 June, 2014, 10:11:23 AM
Thanks, chaps.
.
And my best to your good lady, Amines, I hope it's just a pesky sprain and that you are being suitably annoying with the cushion-plumping, tea-making and general fussing around :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: amines2058 on 06 June, 2014, 10:30:21 AM
Thanks all for the best wishes, although in honesty I should have been expecting something like this.
The last time she was pregnant coincided with when we moved mouse.
At eight and a half months gone my good lady wife decided to go upstairs to review how the central heating installation was going. Of course all the floor boards were up for the pipework.
The next thing I know is that there are a pair of legs sticking through the kitchen ceiling where she had missed a joist and gone straight through!
Luckily the bump actually prevented her from dropping all the way through and thankfully wife and baby were unharmed.  :o
I think I shall keep have to keep her locked in a soft padded room until this one arrives. :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 06 June, 2014, 10:49:33 AM
Amines, I would like to add my best wishes for your wife, hope she recovers soon. On the subject of recovery, well done Monsieur Requin. We cannot afford to lose any of the great Carlos art! Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 June, 2014, 10:54:39 AM
Gosh. Rest assured the baby could not be any better protected. Take care - and enjoy your last few weeks of sleep!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 June, 2014, 10:56:45 AM
Les chortles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 07 June, 2014, 04:17:01 PM
Quote from: amines2058 on 06 June, 2014, 07:43:13 AM
Aaaargh my 7 and a half month pregnant wife managed to fall down some steps whilst hanging out the washing. Bump is fine but she has either sprained fractured or twisted her ankle! (Chose not to xray due to potential risks to bump) she is now all strapped up and laid up for an unknown amount of time whilst that heals.
I think I may be busy for the next few weeks!!  :'( :(


hope she's well,its a scare allright..mine did the stairs thing at 3months then again at about 7months in lostock hall near the Kentucky where we'd been for some food ,she fell on some uneven pavement ,but the best bit was the complete prick who walked past and kicked the tray of drinks she'd dropped. Only concern for my wife and unborn stopped me spending a night in the cells.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 08 June, 2014, 10:26:30 AM
Mogzilla - if you haven't been told about it check out this little known tax relief for uniforms:
http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/incometax/relief-tools.htm
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 08 June, 2014, 10:39:44 AM
oooh, that could be handy,thanks
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 08 June, 2014, 05:49:22 PM
Just pissed of Cliff Robinson despite loving his stuff. Me so sad  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 June, 2014, 06:39:18 PM
I don't think you did, mind.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 08 June, 2014, 06:53:33 PM
Ach, well maybe he did a wee bit.....only kidding Matt. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 10 June, 2014, 07:45:04 PM
Missed an appointment 'cause I went on the wrong damn bus, nearly went to Morpeth instead of Ashington.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 11 June, 2014, 08:06:55 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 08 June, 2014, 06:39:18 PM
I don't think you did, mind.

Hope not.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 12 June, 2014, 12:24:00 PM
PC monitor broken, broadband router broken, Wii U gamepad broken.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 12 June, 2014, 02:19:39 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 12 June, 2014, 12:24:00 PM
PC monitor broken, broadband router broken, Wii U gamepad broken.

what have you been watching?  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 12 June, 2014, 02:31:29 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 12 June, 2014, 02:19:39 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 12 June, 2014, 12:24:00 PM
PC monitor broken, broadband router broken, Wii U gamepad broken.

what have you been watching?  :o

Breaking Bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 14 June, 2014, 10:41:06 PM
... when one has so much to do one doesn't know where to begin, so... ends up watching another World Cup match.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 June, 2014, 06:06:05 PM
Here's a minor impediment that nearly turned into a soggy disaster - yesterday, my temporary home almost sank.
.
For reasons I shan't bleat on about here, I am currently living on a canal boat - a state of affairs for which I was, and largely remain, wholly unprepared and miseducated. The boat, which had been unoccupied for several months prior to my arrival, had always "listed to port" which is, I am informed, the nautical term for the inability to adequately control a boiled egg.
.
Now, every boat has a list, apparently, and it has been known for boaters to spend lifetimes rearranging bricks and old 56ib iron weights all over the place in order to satisfy an insatiable spirit level - but most just give up in the end and have it all near-enough. My boat, everyone agreed, was near enough.
.
But, in the mysterious plumbings of this boat, something insidious was patiently working on its own dark project. It seems that there is somewhere a drip and that drip has found its way, over one or maybe even two years, into the 4 inch void between the cabin floor and the steel hull. In what I consider to be a fairly serious design flaw, this void is filled with bricks and broken paving stones and then sealed up without even an inspection hatch. And so, unobserved and unnoticed, drip by drip by drip, month by month, the void filled with horrid, stagnant water. The boat was sinking in slow motion, a millimetre a day, so that nobody noticed - least of all the naiive novice living aboard...
.
The pointy bit at the front is the bow, and between the bow and the doors leading into the cabin is a kind of step area, a small metal sunken patio kind of affair. This area is called the "cratch" (sp?) and its base is below the side of the boat but above the cabin floor, so one steps down off the wharf (the wooden thing for tying boats to so they don't wander off) onto the cratch and down off the cratch into the cabin. My cratch had a puddle in it, at one side. I'd been thinking it was rainwater and had been saying to myself for days that I needed to un-bung the drain hole. Yesterday I finally got around to using the Special Drain Un-Bunging Tool (the sawn off end of a pool cue) but, after a moment's confusion, I discovered that the drain wasn't bunged-up but submerged and that the puddle wasn't rainwater but a piece of the canal. And it was almost running into the cabin.
.
Quick as a flash, I stood eyeing the situation, rubbing my chin and looking lost - which is, of course, the international body language version of the SOS. Sure enough, other boaters were soon on hand with advice, help, tools and tea.
.
The long and short of it is that I had to chisel a hole in the floor to get to the flooded and fetid void and then pump like hell. I took around 40 five gallon buckets of water out before, mercifully, someone chipped in with an electric pump which ran for almost half an hour.
.
It was all very exciting and even, in a strange way, enjoyable. Right now, I'm sitting in the boat (she's "riding higher" now than she has in months) enjoying the sunshine, all the hatches are open so the breeze can help dry her out. She was, I am given to understand, probably only hours or a big ripple away from going down like a stone in 10ft of water - if it had happened while I was asleep...
.
On the plus side, I'm one small step closer to being a proper longboat captain, having had my first major adventure!
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 18 June, 2014, 06:25:57 PM
...and here was me complaining t'other week when the landlords above had a pipe burst and water came cascading through our ceiling....

wouldn't have sunk the house anyway! Phew, glad everything's ship-shape shark!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 June, 2014, 06:35:35 PM
Thanks, Foxy. Fortunately, the drip seems to be coming from the internal plumbing rather than the external canal so simply running the water tank dry would appear to have stopped it. The biggest impediment is that now I have to go outside to fill the kettle from the tap on the wharf.
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 18 June, 2014, 07:04:39 PM
ooh, nothing worse than a puddle in yer cratch ;) maybe you should change your forum name to uncle albert!
glad its sorted sounds like a lovely life especially with the good weather were having
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 June, 2014, 07:10:19 PM
It is - it really is.
.
Winter, I have been given to understand, might not be...
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 18 June, 2014, 07:22:09 PM
Pah. Some shark you are!  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 June, 2014, 07:24:57 PM
Lesser Spotted Land Shark. Water's for the birds...
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 June, 2014, 12:22:37 PM
Ah the horror of the hidden leak!  I only sail teenchy dinghies, and tend not to live on them, but have spent many, many hours trying to track down the culprits that randomly fill our buoyancy tanks with distinctly unbuoyant water... Like yours, our bow tank lacks an inspection hatch, so our non-emergency efforts are restricted to painstakingly inspecting the washing-up-liquid coated surface in the hope of spotting a wayward cluster of bubbles.  Unlike you, two men can 'easily' lift the boat out of the water, pour out the excess, and turn it upside down for the purpose...

I am trying to work out how your ballast got in there without any sort of hatch, but such are the manifold mysteries of boats.

Good to hear your fellow water-rats pitched in.  Sailors are a fine community to find oneself in, and they like nothing better than to poke about in another man's bilges, so to speak. If only to reassure themselves that there are other boats even less seaworthy than their own. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 June, 2014, 01:19:27 PM
sick of being sick...plagued by health problems at the moment awaiting a "formal" interview for work and a battery of blood tests and probably an endoscopy at some point :'(
just trying to hoover the lounge has left me knackered and sweating buckets ...
just hope its not the big c trying to make a comeback or i'll be moving to the spugs thread.

very very fed up. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 June, 2014, 01:22:00 PM
Mogz lad, you deserve a break and no mistake. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 19 June, 2014, 01:39:35 PM
Keep your chin up kiddo. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 June, 2014, 01:49:18 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 19 June, 2014, 01:39:35 PM
Keep your chins up kiddo. Z

ftfy ;)

cheers, would be nice to feel well for a change
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 19 June, 2014, 01:55:03 PM
Hope everything turns out for the best for you mogz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 19 June, 2014, 03:48:10 PM
Not nice to hear Mogz hope you're feeling better soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 19 June, 2014, 04:14:09 PM
That sucks, Mogs, but the drugs they give you during an endoscopy are the shit.  They make it worth the trip to the hospital bum unit all on their own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 19 June, 2014, 04:16:19 PM
All the best Mogz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 19 June, 2014, 04:27:59 PM
Quote from: Kennari Bjarndýr on 19 June, 2014, 04:14:09 PM
That sucks, Mogs, but the drugs they give you during an endoscopy are the shit.  They make it worth the trip to the hospital bum unit all on their own.

I had one a few years back in both ends! (not at the same time mind!)  if I have to have another I will
be on general anaesthetic after my last experience!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 June, 2014, 05:12:56 PM
My best to you, Mogz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 19 June, 2014, 06:24:46 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 19 June, 2014, 12:38:04 PM
Good man Batson, sincere congratulations! 

Be sure to head over to the Minor Imprediments thread later today and tell us all about it!   :D

After my first full day at work, I now suffer from several problems:
Bad Back
Sore Neck
Starting to Hallucinate slightly
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 19 June, 2014, 06:41:00 PM
Jesus dude are you lifting heavy bales in a dope factory!! Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 19 June, 2014, 06:45:42 PM
The Beauty Factory today, they're proper strict and/or paranoid about law, and Health & Safety. You have to pack these stuff while standing up!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 19 June, 2014, 06:55:24 PM
Fuck that! If you're not comfortable standing ask them to make an adjustment whereby you can get a chair. If they're paranoid about law and H+S fire it back at them. I know you've only started and probably want to keep your head down, and understandably have good will,  but you do have basic rights as a worker. Z

Ps if you can, join a Trade Union.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 20 June, 2014, 09:37:36 AM
Spilt water on my box of progs and megs...

Top few took the brunt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 20 June, 2014, 06:51:32 PM
Got told today that the work times are changing next week, from:

Monday to Thursday - 8:30 am to 4:30 pm
Friday - 8:30 am to 12:30 pm

to

Monday to Friday - 8 am to 5 pm

And to top it all off, I'll be back at the stupid Beauty Factory packing the damn beauty stuff into plastic bags, AND YOUR NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH THE DAMN TAGS.
:( :o :'(

Oh well, at least I have a bad back, and years of physical/mental problems to worry about!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 June, 2014, 07:20:54 PM
Think of the money :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 20 June, 2014, 07:26:23 PM
I'm thinking of my sanity and physical well being
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 June, 2014, 08:20:34 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 20 June, 2014, 06:51:32 PM
Oh well, at least I have a bad back, and years of physical/mental problems to worry about!!!

You've taken to the world of work like a duck to water.

While at work I try to intersperse each specific internal complaint with a tally of how much I've earned that day, and pretend that I'm going to spend that money on specific cool things (instead of the mortgage, petrol and moshi monsters).  Sometimes I even take the tax off before I do it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:33:51 PM
certain elements of this board that take the fun out of it being the reason I'm off ...bye!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 20 June, 2014, 08:38:19 PM
Come on Mog you're a valued member of the forum and I for one think it will be a smaller place without you. Please reconsider: stay and contribute. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:43:12 PM
sorry now my fatherhood is being questioned I've had it shame as only a few elitist pricks and their lackys and arselickers have spoilt what have been a fun few years ...just wish indigo prime would get off his butt and initialise that ban. good wishes to all the nice people on here who I have had many a jolly time with ...i'll still be flying the flag and keeping up with the fargos but as a fan rather than a member of a sometimes hateful place. as grouch marx says "I wouldn't be a member of any club that wanted me!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 20 June, 2014, 08:44:04 PM
BSC: "We work hard with our own hands. When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure...." Corinthians 4:12  ;) Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 20 June, 2014, 08:45:27 PM
Again Mogs: please,  please reconsider. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 June, 2014, 08:46:24 PM
Be very sorry to lose you Mogzilla, especially over something as inevitably emotive as (alleged) paedophilia in comics - nothing surer to get a brisk argument going and shirt collars up and silly things said. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:50:19 PM
oh, its been brewing a while this ,this latest thread has just been the final straw with certain elitists and their lackeys/bum lickers getting away with trolling /flaming etc .  will always be a fan but as for forums ,I had enough. best wishes to all the nice folk on here and its a shame some choose to spoil things .

see ya!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 20 June, 2014, 08:51:18 PM
Absolutely lads, the thread in question has got just a wee bit too close to the bone. I can't tell you all what to do; and don't want to in any way inhibit free discussion but noone's going to win out of that particular thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:54:23 PM
its cool, they can "win" I'm walking away as soon as indigo gets his thumb out and bans me....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 June, 2014, 08:57:04 PM
I'm not trying to ban you, or indeed myself, mog. I respect you as i respect anyone else here. I just feel your argument is somewhat misinformed on certain matters and unjustified (as far as I can ascertain) on others. Opinions opinions opinions.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:59:52 PM
your not banning me I'm getting myself banned /off the board any way I can ... I have enough o worry about in real life without getting itno arguments with others .sorry if you misunderstood my posts  and I didn't mean to get sweary at you but some thin gs get my hackles up .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 June, 2014, 09:31:12 PM
?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 21 June, 2014, 12:51:31 AM
Quote from: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:59:52 PM
your not banning me I'm getting myself banned /off the board any way I can ... I have enough o worry about in real life without getting itno arguments with others .sorry if you misunderstood my posts  and I didn't mean to get sweary at you but some thin gs get my hackles up .

If you wish to leave then why not just leave? Why attempt to get yourself banned?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you should leave, or that I want you to leave (I actually don't.) I'm just trying to fathom the requirement to get banned.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 June, 2014, 08:57:41 AM
I don't want you to leave us, Mogz - why not simply keep your account dormant and just take a sabbatical? Go for a wander on the 'net then come back and tell us what you've learned. Don't shut the door so firmly with this silly banning business, it just leaves the potential for inconvenience and even trouble in the future.
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 21 June, 2014, 09:07:06 AM
If you're reading mogs, have a wee think, listen to Sharks advice and re-activate your account. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 June, 2014, 01:16:26 PM
...because I am drinking tea but my wife wants me to stand up, walk around and do stuff.

FASCISM.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 21 June, 2014, 01:29:53 PM
Quote from: Trout on 21 June, 2014, 01:16:26 PM
...because I am drinking tea but my unwell wife wants me to stand up, walk around and do stuff.

FASCISM.

FTFY
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 June, 2014, 01:56:28 PM
Ah, she's mostly mended now.

I made my own tea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 June, 2014, 02:48:49 PM
Glad to hear yer missus is on the mend, Trout. Best regards to you all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 June, 2014, 02:54:35 PM
Quote from: mogzilla on 20 June, 2014, 08:33:51 PM
certain elements of this board that take the fun out of it being the reason I'm off ...bye!

Sorry to read about your recent health problems. Mogz. I hope you recover and feel better soon. Don't be a stranger dude.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 21 June, 2014, 03:01:29 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 20 June, 2014, 08:44:04 PM
BSC: "We work hard with our own hands. When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure...." Corinthians 4:12  ;) Z

Thank you for that! :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 21 June, 2014, 04:26:07 PM
Could be worse,
you could be this woman...
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/8025440000/hB2EDDC9A/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 21 June, 2014, 04:29:20 PM
Quote from: The Doctor Alt 8 on 21 June, 2014, 04:26:07 PM
Could be worse,
you could be this woman...
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/8025440000/hB2EDDC9A/)

:o

Wouldn't want to be her when around random strangers. :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 June, 2014, 05:29:03 PM
The Parper of Seville?
.
The Wind of the Nibelung?
.
Madame Gufferfly?
.
The Magic Poot?
.
La Gioponga?
.
Skidmark and Isolde?
.
I'll get me cape...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 21 June, 2014, 06:32:12 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 21 June, 2014, 02:48:49 PM
Glad to hear yer missus is on the mend, Trout. Best regards to you all.

Cheers, Paddy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 21 June, 2014, 06:38:14 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 20 June, 2014, 06:51:32 PM
to top it all off, I'll be back at the stupid Beauty Factory packing the damn beauty stuff into plastic bags, AND YOUR NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH THE DAMN TAGS Oh well, at least I have a bad back, and years of physical/mental problems to worry about!!!

Aye, but just think of how lovely and soft your well moisturised hands are going to feel after a day at The Beauty Factory though. At the end of a shift I just stink of sweat - you'll smell of jasmine.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 22 June, 2014, 01:29:26 AM
My wife fell down the stairs to the basement and now she has a purple foot.

Bloody hell.  ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 22 June, 2014, 01:35:36 AM
Quote from: Trout on 22 June, 2014, 01:29:26 AM
My wife fell down the stairs to the basement and now she has a purple foot.

Bloody hell.  ::)

What did she do? Stuff up the dinner?*


*domestic violence is no joke kids. Trout should be locked up for his actions
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 22 June, 2014, 01:37:59 AM
Sorry to hear it. All the best to you and the missus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 22 June, 2014, 01:46:19 AM
Thanks. I'm sure she'll be fine. She was limping a lot as we went shopping for a replacement car.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 22 June, 2014, 05:22:10 AM
Joking aside, sorry about your wife getting hurt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 22 June, 2014, 07:54:23 AM
Jesus, that's no craic at all Trout. Hope things get on the up soon. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 June, 2014, 08:09:51 AM
I'd like to say something funny, but it turns out that- in my hands at least - the subject of injured wives and the possible culpability of their husbands just isn't.  So instead I'll be boring and wish Her Piscine Majesty swift healing and an end to accidents, and commiserate with Trout over any delays in tea preparation he may encounter.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 22 June, 2014, 08:19:23 AM

Your poor wife is obviously related to Sorry Bobbs. Make like Alpha and get her off world before flash flooding joins the litany of calamities to befall your brood.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 June, 2014, 08:31:49 AM
My very best wishes for Mrs Trout, may healing be swift.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 June, 2014, 09:56:58 AM
Why weren't you going to the basement for her...!?

;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 June, 2014, 12:35:37 PM
There's a whole psychology paper in that question...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 June, 2014, 12:58:55 PM
This is of course the same basement that was trailed as the future TroutCave.  Perhaps the lethal privacy-ensuring defences are already in place?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 22 June, 2014, 03:46:10 PM
Yeah, I'm not sure if I'm totally decided on kitting out the basement as a permanent home for comics. It's a nice house but the area is really boring. I've launched a campaign to move downtown within a few years. So I may go the route of temporary shelving instead. I'm thinking.

Anyway, my wife's toe looks like a small aubergine and I'm being sympathetic. Thanks for your kind words everyone, and for realising we shouldn't joke about domestic violence. You're not a bad bunch.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 June, 2014, 08:02:55 PM
Blimey, Trout -- your (unarguably) better half has been in the wars lately! Are you sure age hasn't contracted the opposite of Red Dwarf's good luck virus?!

Best wishes to her for a speedy recovery from all her maladies. More importantly: how was the humus?

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 June, 2014, 09:07:25 PM
Quote from: Trout on 22 June, 2014, 01:29:26 AM
My wife fell down the stairs to the basement and now she has a purple foot.

Bloody hell.  ::)

Ouch, hope she is ok.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 22 June, 2014, 11:45:20 PM
Jesus, Trouty, she's had it rough of late.  Hope she's ok
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 23 June, 2014, 01:26:57 AM
Thanks, all. She's not too bad, although very grumpy. I lost her in a supermarket for 20 minutes today and became convinced she'd been taken to hospital. There was nothing to suggest she had been; it's just the way things have been going.  :)

Ah, we're not doing so badly. We finally settled into a house, we should get a new (to us) car within a couple of weeks and everybody's healthy. Mostly!

And the hummus was delish. Extra garlic.

- Trout
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 23 June, 2014, 10:56:36 AM
Good on you, Trout.

Just realised my automated backups haven't been running since May. What a plonker I am.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 23 June, 2014, 01:11:36 PM
My local pub had a car crash through it:

http://www.edp24.co.uk/news/video_and_photo_gallery_i_just_assumed_people_would_be_dead_person_injured_as_car_ploughs_into_busy_norwich_pub_1_3651067

Had to drink in the Playhouse on Friday - it's not on!

Thankfully no one was hurt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 23 June, 2014, 01:26:41 PM
I've heard of crashing a party but...!! Z :o
Glad no one was hurt btw
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 24 June, 2014, 12:10:48 PM
Labyrinthitis - why do some illnesses got cute names?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 25 June, 2014, 05:22:07 PM
The little out of the way newsagent were I buy my prog every Wednesday (And who had the Summer Special in stock, no bother at all) is shutting this Saturday  :(

Now what am I going to do?!?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 25 June, 2014, 05:27:16 PM
When that happened to me I took it as a sign from Tharg that I needed a subscription. Never looked back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 26 June, 2014, 11:44:21 PM
Buy it Spikes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 28 June, 2014, 07:53:49 AM
What's that Nintendo? I'm not allowed to change the region setting on my 3ds to USA despite having moved here permanently (which was hassle-free to do my iphone)?

So you're saying I can't download Shovel Knight because it doesn't have a 'Pal' release date yet?

And you're still - for reasons known only to yourselves - steadfastly refusing to release any SNES games on the eshop?

I love you Nintendo, but get with the fucking program. It's 2014.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 June, 2014, 01:24:27 PM
The region locking nonsense is baffling Radiator.

As for SNES games- they seem to be pushing them on the WiiU eShop, not the 3DS.
Dunno why.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 28 June, 2014, 01:57:56 PM
Think I might have a bend. Gonna give it an hour before I decide to go to the recompression chamber...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 28 June, 2014, 03:26:42 PM
The rapture of the deep. Hope you're ok. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 28 June, 2014, 04:57:26 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 28 June, 2014, 01:24:27 PM
The region locking nonsense is baffling Radiator.

As for SNES games- they seem to be pushing them on the WiiU eShop, not the 3DS.
Dunno why.

Nintendo are getting on my tits at the moment. They're not selling WiiUs and they're still trying to charge £5 or more for 30 year old titles.
I'd like to see Nintendo do a retro themed WiiU. Bundle it with a disc containing a ton of old 8 and 16 bit titles - all Marios up to Yoshi's Island, all Zeldas up to ALTTP, both Punch Outs, Kirby, Donkey Kong and a few fillers like Balloon Fight and Kid Icarus. Sell it for £200 and if they can bundle in a light gun and Duck Hunt I'll pay another £20!

Pit may not be a good thing to rely on past glories but with hardly any new titles being released they have to do something!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 28 June, 2014, 05:43:44 PM
My washine machine finished it's cycle.  The first thing I pulled out was my favourite headphones.  Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 28 June, 2014, 07:26:57 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 28 June, 2014, 05:43:44 PM
My washine machine finished it's cycle.  The first thing I pulled out was my favourite headphones.  Bah.

You just reminded me to take two pound coins and a screw out of my back pocket before sticking my work trousers into the wash. Cheers, neebs!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 28 June, 2014, 07:41:06 PM
False alarm. Doctor Tim the Dive Doctor gave me a check up (on his day off I might add. Pint for that man!) and it was just some blood in my throat. You know, that one clot of blood that usually hardens in your nose and gives you a heart attack.  It had rapidly coagulated due to the cold water and naturally I coughed it up on the surface.

I should point out about now that diving is not a hobby for the screamish.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 28 June, 2014, 08:33:26 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 28 June, 2014, 07:41:06 PM

I should point out about now that diving is not a hobby for the screamish.

It was the gruesome details of the Byford Dolphin incident that put me off the idea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 29 June, 2014, 11:18:12 PM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 28 June, 2014, 08:33:26 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 28 June, 2014, 07:41:06 PM

I should point out about now that diving is not a hobby for the screamish.

It was the gruesome details of the Byford Dolphin incident that put me off the idea.
A grizzly affair, luckily a true one of a kind incident. Plus they where diving at depths well below the recreational PADI AOW limit of 60 meters. These guys where not just teckies, but true mavericks of the job.

No, I was diving at a mere 22 meters. Sadly I was using a new form of dry suit dump valve, shoulder mounted on a rivet, rather than a ball fixed wrist dump. This means I have to manually control the release of air from my suit as I ascend much more carefully. The last 15 meters where uncontrollable after I hit the thermocline. Kept my lung cavity open, as is standard, and just took it as experience. Shallow dives for me until I get the hang of the new gear. Didn't help the neoprene neck seal leaked a little! Need a smaller under suit....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 02 July, 2014, 08:46:07 PM
Took the car in to be serviced. I should have known something was wrong when it took five hours to get back to me with an estimate. You could hear the glee in the mechanic's voice as she listed off the totals.

Now I have two days to come up with the money to pay for it all. Sigh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 02 July, 2014, 09:11:01 PM
Recently discovered that the part of America where I live is overdue an almighty earthquake - which could well be the worst natural disaster in US history. Could happen today, could happen in fifty years time, but everyone pretty much agrees that it will happen at some point.

Chilling stuff, kind of plays on the mind. Genuinely planning to stock up the flat with bottled water, tinned food and other emergency supplies. Hopefully won't turn into some crazy Doomsday Prepper in the process.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 July, 2014, 03:02:33 PM
Turned up for my second day's archaeology work in a looong time to find the gate to the field blocked. The chap who rents the land is here and is not happy with us driving over and digging trenches through his crops despite this all having been finalised with the actual land-owner months ago. The chap is furious though and won't be calmed down. He says he is like "christ nailed to the cross" and by just doing our job "we are the same as those that threw children and jews in furnaces".

Turns out - of course - that this is all fuss because he wants more compensation money than he's been allocated previously out of the company - there's a big faff and he demands we take our works cabin out by lunchtime and get away before he calls the police. The landowner caves to negotiation and our company tell us to leave it be and we are sent packing until Tuesday.

Second day on the job - and now nowt til next week because of some weaselcock who thinks its perfectly fine to compare strangers to nazis because he wants more money for nothing. FFFFFFFUUUU
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 06 July, 2014, 05:40:44 AM
Sick. Again. My face feels like it was run over by a bus. Could use some pain relief*

*[spoiler]medicinal marijuana. [/spoiler]
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 06 July, 2014, 08:29:14 PM
Why is drawing people's likenesses so bloody hard?!?!?!?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 06 July, 2014, 10:54:45 PM
Had to replace the lightbulb in my car, a 5 year old Volvo.

Unbeknownst to me, it has xenon bulbs.

£60 for a light bulb. £60!

For a LIGHTBULB!

EDIT: That was from Halfords, who were less than Volvo - they wanted £96.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 07 July, 2014, 05:06:48 AM
xenon or hid? If they are just xenon you got ripped off. Just put standard bulbs in for a couple of quid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 07 July, 2014, 08:48:10 AM
Ah, it was hid. I don't know the difference

It looked like a tin foul match box with a surgical implement poking out
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 07 July, 2014, 12:10:33 PM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 28 June, 2014, 08:33:26 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 28 June, 2014, 07:41:06 PM

I should point out about now that diving is not a hobby for the screamish.

It was the gruesome details of the Byford Dolphin incident that put me off the idea.

I just Googled that.  I feel really sick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 July, 2014, 02:15:41 PM
Quick update on my holiday position. Oh, sorry, I haven't posted in....days?

Anyway, incase you haven't tpseen the European forcast, I am currently situated under litteraly the only band of rain on the continent. And it's not just raining, it's pissing it down with great aplomb.

Shit on it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 08 July, 2014, 03:21:08 PM
Squeamish.

Grisly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 July, 2014, 03:34:49 PM
Serious event occured a moment ago. Little brother slipped and seriously damaged his upper teeth a moment ago. Seem's we might have to head home, but at the moment i'm immensely concerned for Charlie. Bless his soul he's a trooper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 08 July, 2014, 03:48:27 PM
Hope the wee lad's ok there Hawk. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 July, 2014, 09:46:45 PM
Turns out his upper jaw is just fine but he's lost all four upper front teeth, both incisors and canines. Looks like a bloody Bond villein but he's still smiling.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 08 July, 2014, 10:11:00 PM
You heading back then or staying out there - ? Yeesh that's a frightener - he young enough that those were replaceable or are those out for good?

I knew a chap who was on holiday and knocked out his fronters and the doctors told him the best thing to do was FORCE THEM BACK IN. *shudder shuddery flubbles*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 July, 2014, 10:23:43 PM
We're staying. Charlies pumped up on pain killers and sugar, and it would be a long pointless journey back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 11 July, 2014, 10:03:12 AM
Off to London for LFCC today - have nowhere to stay and no idea what I'm doing.

So I'm sure it'll be fine!  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 11 July, 2014, 12:40:21 PM
See you there CFM.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 12 July, 2014, 09:12:13 AM
Some wee scrote tried to break into my home a couple of weeks ago. I heard a loud bang as they forced the living room window open and saw the lamp come on. I came thundering into the now empty living room to find my window fucked and a dirty smackrat scuttling across the road to a waiting (stolen, as it turns out) car.

Nothing was taken and nobody was hurt, but it's been massively inconvenient. I had to spend all day Sunday waiting for the police to come and take a statement. They turned up the following Friday. Then I had to take yesterday morning off work for a couple of workmen to come and replace the hinges/runners on the window. They turned up at twenty past one. For an already quite broad "AM" appointment. Seriously - can nobody turn up when they say they will any more?

Seems the little shits had knocked the car off earlier that evening and had been cruising around the area, looking for opportunities. They'd tried several houses and caused quite a bit of damage, including bursting through the window of one house to find one surprised family, sitting in front of the TV, staring back at them. They were last seen by the police, racing up Smithdown Road towards the city centre, but the patrol car didn't give chase because they didn't have permission.  :|

Now, I know Judge Dredd is supposed to be a satire, and nobody really wants to see that sort of thing, but just sometimes...  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 12 July, 2014, 02:07:11 PM
That's a staggering tale there chief; just about sums up the average experience of crime and the unsatisfying aftermath. My best to you and yours. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 12 July, 2014, 05:50:21 PM
with luck they crashed and got injured or overdosed ...I feel your frustration but how many of us have wished for a cannon button on the dash now and again?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 13 July, 2014, 12:49:35 PM
It really depends on where you are. When I got jumped by a mob of scallies, a copper came round within a few hours of me reporting it - and raced off to catch someone who was going through people's back gardens half way through the interview before coming back to finish up. At least that's what he said maybe he just went for a cheeky pint.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 13 July, 2014, 01:07:00 PM
most of the coppers I know cant run anymore!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: GrinningChimera on 27 July, 2014, 01:08:52 AM
My girlfriend of over 3 years left me yesterday. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 27 July, 2014, 01:22:36 AM
Sorry to hear that kiddo, we've most of us been through that particular misery (apart from the girl boarders). Hope it works out.....if not: time's a healer. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 27 July, 2014, 03:11:17 AM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 27 July, 2014, 01:08:52 AM
My girlfriend of over 3 years left me yesterday. :(

Yikes, sorry to hear that GC.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hoagy on 27 July, 2014, 10:58:39 AM
Wasn't she sick on your week off ten pages ago GC? Hmmm. Was she sick or suffering cowardice of the living in denial?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 28 July, 2014, 12:42:22 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 28 June, 2014, 05:43:44 PM
My washine machine finished it's cycle.  The first thing I pulled out was my favourite headphones.  Bah.
Could be worse..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkrgTuIJSlM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkrgTuIJSlM)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 28 July, 2014, 02:23:43 AM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 27 July, 2014, 01:08:52 AM
My girlfriend of over 3 years left me yesterday. :(

Nae luck, mate. You should get pished. All the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 July, 2014, 10:18:14 AM
Quote from: Trout on 28 July, 2014, 02:23:43 AM
Quote from: GrinningChimera on 27 July, 2014, 01:08:52 AM
My girlfriend of over 3 years left me yesterday. :(

Nae luck, mate. You should get pished. All the best.

The pithy fish is correct.
Join Captain Morgans crew of miserable young scallywags and set sail for the edge of the horizon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing on 28 July, 2014, 12:47:40 PM
Sorry to hear that GC, and hope you're bearing up. Reminds me I also owe you a pm about arms- which I will try to get to in the next few days.

My own minor impediment is that a week ago I underwent some "minor" surgery, which has rendered me useless, in grotesque pain, addicted to painkillers and unable to lift even a finger. If that's "minor" surgery I have no wish to ever undergo anything "major". First general anaesthetic too. Not an experience I am in a hurry to repeat.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 29 July, 2014, 02:01:55 PM
Sorry to heat that SBT.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 31 July, 2014, 02:09:31 PM
Hope you're functional soon, SBT.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 16 August, 2014, 09:01:21 PM
I've worked 175.3 hours since 1st August.

That's 13.48 hours a day, with two Saturdays off. And I'm about to start work again now, 9pm on Saturday night, having already done six hours today.

For all practical purposes, I haven't seen my kids for a month: it's been the school holidays, so I've left for work and come back when they are sleeping, and then worked the Sundays.

Sometimes, I loathe my job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 16 August, 2014, 09:06:49 PM
That is a hard one to be dealing with Doc, sorry to hear, particularity for the wee ones. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 16 August, 2014, 10:37:58 PM
Yep. There's no good answer when a four year old asks:

"Why won't you play any more, daddy?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 August, 2014, 04:48:58 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 16 August, 2014, 09:01:21 PM
Sometimes, I loathe my job.

Yeah, that's a vile place to find yourself indeed.  When I reflect on the various self-inflicted disasters that are the past 5 years of my life, the ONLY part I don't regret is the time that I got to spend with my kids (and that only 'cos I couldn't afford to pay anyone else to do it!).  I may have resented the brake it put on my putting things back together, I may have been stressed to the gills through most of it and been little fun to be with, it may have meant there was/is no money for dentists or holidays or PS3s (or colleges and branded trainers in the future), but that time was one of the great boons of my life, and it stands in happy contrast to the 70-100 hour weeks that was my existence for the first 4 years of my eldest's life, whose company I was seldom in once he started sleeping through the night. 

However, as you know, there's some stuff you really, really need money for, but when you've earned it just make sure you don't throw it out the window like I did!  Worst of both worlds.

I'm presently squaring the circle with night shifts, which leaves me a tired'n'grouchy friendless fecker, but means I'm there for them for (most) of the day.  My youngest is starting school in a fortnight (the first few weeks of which she's seems to be in for about 30 seconds), and at least I should be around to pick her up, which I have been dreading missing.   

Don't envy you one bit, Dr. X, but let's compare notes again when it's pension time!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 19 August, 2014, 04:23:08 PM
Through running my own business, I missed a lot of my son's growing up and it is, by far, the biggest regret of my life.  Doesn't matter how much money you earn, it's not worth it.  Spend time with your kids, they'll fly away soon enough.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 19 August, 2014, 04:28:42 PM
Working from home with a three month old baby, I have the opposite problem - I'm barely getting 4-5 hours of work done each day. I'm sitting here now keeping an eye on him whilst his Mum's asleep, which is beautiful and very lovely, but means my inbox is getting ever more full...!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 19 August, 2014, 04:52:07 PM
That's wonderful, Banners, the inbox can wait!!  It so happens that my lad's in the same position as you, spends half his working time in the studio attached to his house drawing, so he sees the little 'uns before he goes to work, at tea breaks, lunch breaks, etc., etc.  The other half of his working life is spent working in the games industry where the hours of work are ridiculous, but very well paid.  I know which one he prefers though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 August, 2014, 05:55:15 PM
Because in the immortal words of Mr D Glover in Lethal Weapon I, II, III and IV - "I'm getting too old for this shit" - Just got back from a festival (Green Man in Wales - lovely) and whilst I had a great time, I just don't have the same stamina these days.

My companion sloped off to her bed around midnight each day but I always like getting trollied and wandering around observing the colourful sea of humanity and dancing the night away at the various late night bars and dance tents. All I could think of though was my aching feet and stiff back and it wasn't long before I was crashing out also.

Hangovers also seem to take about three times as long to disappear too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 August, 2014, 07:09:48 PM
And it takes us all night to do what we used to do all night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 August, 2014, 07:38:58 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 19 August, 2014, 11:40:10 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 19 August, 2014, 05:55:15 PM
Hangovers also seem to take about three times as long to disappear too.

Yes. This.

I was at a beer festival on Saturday night. Several drinks were consumed. Sunday was a write-off and Monday was a grind.

It was only beer, for fuck's sake.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dog Deever on 20 August, 2014, 11:24:59 AM
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!

That is all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 21 August, 2014, 10:52:15 PM
Just been feeling really tired out lately.

Had a manic month so far. Two conventions, some FOUR books lettered in the time between them, and loads of other non-related guff to deal with around the sides. Result? I feel completely drained.

Today was my first dead day since the whole crazy cycle began, and I've been waiting for my batteries to kick in again. It ain't happening. I'm actually wondering if I'll ever get my once fabled energy reserves back again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 August, 2014, 11:29:35 PM
CHANGE OF SCENE

I don't know your situation, but whether it's an unexpected afternoon in the park or six months bumming around Machu Picchu, it's amazing how a change can reset your perspective. Have a break dude!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 August, 2014, 03:09:09 AM
Making myself rather unpopular on tonight's gruesomely long night shift by insisting that it really doesn't matter how ridiculously short a very drunk woman's skirt is, she really, truly, is never 'asking to be raped'.  Apparently I know that I am wrong, I just won't allow myself to say it.

Is that mindset really still a thing?  It seems like something left over from the 80's.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 August, 2014, 07:24:45 AM
Where are you working, "On the Busses"?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 23 August, 2014, 02:26:25 PM
I cracked one lens of my glasses yesterday, in an unusual incident involving my own clumsiness in the foyer of a local radio station. I was actually a bit woozy for a few minutes, to the utter disdain of a hatchet-faced receptionist. It was a good knock to the face. My own fault.

Now I need to get new glasses, which I've been planning to sort out for a while anyway.

But... I quite like the cracked glass. I think it gives me a rather post-apocalyptic look. Human flesh, anyone?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 24 August, 2014, 03:46:41 AM
Oddly enough, DDD, I opted to do something much like that. Had a night out, caught up with people I used to see out drinking a few years ago, and got hailed as a hero for working in comics.

So, to recap, that's:

Beer.
Old drinking buddies.
Ego boost.

And I've got a date next week. I'm happy to call that a turnaround!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 24 August, 2014, 01:49:13 PM
Quote from: Trout on 23 August, 2014, 02:26:25 PM
I cracked one lens of my glasses yesterday, in an unusual incident involving my own clumsiness in the foyer of a local radio station.

We demand details.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 24 August, 2014, 03:39:08 PM
There aren't any. I tripped, then whacked my face on something I was carrying. I was there to write something about a political event, and... That's all. Kind of dull.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 24 August, 2014, 09:01:30 PM
I did the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. It was cold.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 24 August, 2014, 09:07:51 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 24 August, 2014, 09:01:30 PM
I did the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. It was cold.

I wish someone would post a video of one of these challenges on social media.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 August, 2014, 02:14:34 AM
Quote from: HdE on 21 August, 2014, 10:52:15 PM
Just been feeling really tired out lately.

Had a manic month so far. Two conventions, some FOUR books lettered in the time between them, and loads of other non-related guff to deal with around the sides. Result? I feel completely drained.

Today was my first dead day since the whole crazy cycle began, and I've been waiting for my batteries to kick in again. It ain't happening. I'm actually wondering if I'll ever get my once fabled energy reserves back again.

Likewise. Been working flat out for almost a year on a long-term work contract. Summer in particular is an extremely busy time for me. Feel like I am dunked under water and then when I come up for air summer is over.

Had my first week day off this year a couple of weeks back. Managed to get away for a holiday (our first in about three years). I'd forgotten what it felt like not to be shattered.

Needless to say, straight away I got back into working late, getting in late from training etc so feel like I've wiped out the rest from the hol.

Anyway I'll have plenty of time to recover. Work finishes any day now and it'll be unemploymentsville for me. Well, I'll revert to freelancing but nothing lined up.

(Will be good to get back into doing some drawing though.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 25 August, 2014, 02:37:36 AM
I hear you SuperSurfer (and HdE)...
Been contracting for 12 years and the job situation has gone from precarious to simply wait-for-the-bad-news in the last few weeks. You hope for the best.

Taking up the old art a bit more seriously has crossed my mind recently too. Not as a career (obviously), just diverting during the inevitable job hunt.

All the best anyway. Hope the job situation sorts itself out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 August, 2014, 08:21:33 PM
After waiting for over a week for an appointment, the car went into a ~shudder~ main dealer on Thursday with a power steering problem - a potentially major impediment.

Got a call that day to say they needed more time to look at it so would keep it in until today when it would be their top priority, and their top man for this kind of thing would be back off holiday. This meant being without the family car for the Bank Holiday weekend - another minor impediment in itself.

I hadn't received a call about the car by 5:30pm today so went in to the garage to see what was happening. I was told that the problem is to do with the entire steering rack and they need more time to look into it further.

Given they have now looked at the car twice - which presumably means taking it in and out of the service area - it is quite a coincidence that the car is parked in the exact same place that I left it on Thursday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 August, 2014, 08:37:05 PM
Being self-employed, and with my wife on Maternity Leave, we are struggling to get a mortgage as my Accounts for the last year are less than stellar, and despite paying myself a humble but decent enough income, and having some good work lined up over the next few months. HSBC, Santander and Nationwide aren't interested and the IFA I spoke to wants a ludicrous fee for a shit rate, and we would have to pay that fee even if we don't end up getting a house.

Explained the situation to Tesco Bank who said no problem, they would consider my taxable income rather than my company Accounts. So, they arranged a telephone interview today which meant inconveniencing the Grandparents, getting lots of things ready and losing a few hours of work.

All went well, and it was very convivial - although I felt a little bit patronised when I had to answer questions about different kinds of mortgage and other basic financial concepts. Lasted about two hours (with a break) and after the guy had done the maths - hurrah! at last! - everything was agreed and we could get a 'decision in principle' for the house of our dreams where we can bring up our son.

Right, the chap said, all you need to do is send in your Accounts.

But, I said, the whole point of us talking to you was that on the initial contact you said you didn't need my Accounts, and could base an offer on my actual income which I have diligently proven to you, with evidence direct from HMRC.

Oh no, that's not right - you shouldn't have been told that. There is no way we would consider a mortgage without looking at your Accounts.

I don't object to them taking that stance - that's their perogative as a lender - but what a fucking waste of time.

A bad day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 August, 2014, 09:24:18 AM
Quote from: Banners on 26 August, 2014, 08:37:05 PM
Oh no, that's not right - you shouldn't have been told that. There is no way we would consider a mortgage without looking at your Accounts.

I don't object to them taking that stance - that's their perogative as a lender - but what a fucking waste of time.
It's worse than that. Whoever you spoke to first will be on commission for number of leads passed through so they've just lied to you for the sake of a couple of quid. Pretty shit.

My minor impediment is that the key to my bike lock snapped off in the lock last night so I had to walk home from town in the rain, get the tram in this morning and I'll have to faff around at lunchtime trying to find pliers and a keycutter (or boltcutters I suppose) and crap.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 27 August, 2014, 10:39:44 AM
Cheers, Cosh.

Had a gate key snap in the lock a while ago. Boltcutters didn't work so I had to borrow an angle-grinder. This was a bit of a pain, but I felt like a real man when I got to use it and sent sparks flying everywhere. Good luck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 27 August, 2014, 10:54:22 AM
look online you could probably open it with a bic pen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 27 August, 2014, 10:55:52 AM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 27 August, 2014, 10:54:22 AM
look online you could probably open it with a bic pen.
That's only for D locks, sadly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 27 August, 2014, 01:11:31 PM
Quote from: Banners on 27 August, 2014, 10:39:44 AM
Cheers, Cosh.

Had a gate key snap in the lock a while ago. Boltcutters didn't work so I had to borrow an angle-grinder. This was a bit of a pain, but I felt like a real man when I got to use it and sent sparks flying everywhere. Good luck.

I had to do that to our back door hinges when I snapped a key in the lock. It looked awesome!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 27 August, 2014, 06:09:39 PM
Quote from: Banners
Given they have now looked at the car twice - which presumably means taking it in and out of the service area - it is quite a coincidence that the car is parked in the exact same place that I left it on Thursday.

Car still parked in the same place today, despite being told they have been working on it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 August, 2014, 06:19:07 PM
Quote from: Banners on 27 August, 2014, 06:09:39 PM
Quote from: Banners
Given they have now looked at the car twice - which presumably means taking it in and out of the service area - it is quite a coincidence that the car is parked in the exact same place that I left it on Thursday.

Car still parked in the same place today, despite being told they have been working on it.

I had a similar situation when my car was in the garage for a month after an accident earlier this year, they claimed it was in the workshop when I phoned for a progress report and then got very embarrassed when I told them that the tracker showed it was still at the back of their compound and hadn't moved for three days  :).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 August, 2014, 08:06:43 AM
Quote from: Rog69

I had a similar situation when my car was in the garage for a month after an accident earlier this year, they claimed it was in the workshop when I phoned for a progress report and then got very embarrassed when I told them that the tracker showed it was still at the back of their compound and hadn't moved for three days  :).

That sucks - although I'm glad you can smile about it now.

The thing is, I'm so beholden to them. I want to stand up for myself over what I consider to be shoddy and dishonest service, but I am scared of asking why the car doesn't appear to have moved - which is basically accusing them of lying to me - thereforfe causing conflict, and then giving them reason to take umbrage, which will then result in a rushed, botched and/or unfairly-priced job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 28 August, 2014, 10:24:19 AM
Pop over to 'get something out of the car', leave something on the driver's seat/steering wheel/bit of tape on the door?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 August, 2014, 11:24:49 AM
Thought of that - but such an approach is hardly going to endear myself to them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 August, 2014, 11:31:18 AM
I've really got to get into one of these professions where I can treat my clients like that and still expect to have a business in the morning.  I feel your pain, Banners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 28 August, 2014, 11:42:44 AM
Well, maybe not the tape, but leaving something on the seat/wheel is hardly incriminating. Or taping on the inside of the door would be completely unnoticed I imagine. Or putting something behind/in front of the wheels would be best.

For your own satisfaction if nothing else...and for when they finally get around to it, and you can point out that you know that you've been lied to persistently and demand an explanation for why.

After all at this point there's the slim possibility that it has been moved, looked at, and moved back to where it was.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 August, 2014, 06:02:15 PM
So, thanks for all your interest in this, and apologies for banging on sometimes - but that's what working by myself does to me.

The car is back and the repair cost - after some discounts - came to the princely sum of £38.76, the problem being due to a faulty 'earth cable'. So, on one hand I'm grateful it hasn't cost much, but on the another hand I'm annoyed that it took a week to resolve what seems to be a simple issue, and that the car didn't appear to have been moved for nearly a week.

Anyway, all's well that ends well. Cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 August, 2014, 07:00:42 PM
WTF is an 'earth cable'?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 August, 2014, 07:27:04 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 August, 2014, 07:00:42 PM
WTF is an 'earth cable'?

Its the bit that links one terminal of your battery to the chassis of your car, so that all the circuits of the various electrical systems can be completed easily instead of having to make their way back to the battery individually.  A.k.a. the ground wire.

One benefit of owning a 16 year-old Fiesta is that you get to learn these things as a matter of weekly necessity. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 31 August, 2014, 02:13:47 PM
I was verbally abused in a coffee shop yesterday by a  girl for the heinous act if bumping her with my backpack.

Basically, it was crowded, myself, some friends and the girl were all at the counter, and a group jostled past us on their way out, which is what caused the bumping. Naturally, being the polite person that I am, I turned around quickly and said 'oh my, I'm sorry.'

The girl's response was 'I should f***ing think so!'

But the part that really got me was that she followed that up immediately with 'Watch what you're doing, you ugly bastard!'

The staff saw this but did nothing. I was momentarily taken aback. My friends got ther coffee and went off to find a seat. I took mine... and went to find another seat... at the gobby little cowbag's table.

She was sat with friends, who obviously felt awkward as soon as I took a seat opposite them, before giving their gal pal a VERY forceful lecture on manners and the foolhardiness of antagonising strangers in public.

A member of staff came over to ask if everything was alright, clearly concerned, and I made my feelings on the matter clear. Because they tried to protest and claim they had done nothing wrong, the discussion escalated, they were verbally abusive to the member of staff, and then thrown out.

The staff member tried to gently suggest that I shouldn't have approached the girls, but I pre-empted her and told her that, if she had seen and heard what went on, she should have done something about it there and then, which she grudgingly agreed with.

I may not have handled this particularly wisely... but I feel glad to have made a stand on the issue.

What I can't process is - who the hell attacks somebody, ostensibly over their looks, over being bumped in queue? Who responds to such a minor thing in such a vicious manner? What the hell is wrong with people?


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 August, 2014, 03:51:19 PM
Just screwy human nature - she probably fancied you but panicked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 31 August, 2014, 04:38:25 PM
sounds like a stroppy cow but the whole thing could've been avoided by NOT WEARING A BACKPACK IN A CROWDED PLACE! (sorry, this is one of my pet hates!). I would've pointed this out in a slightly irritated fashion if you'd bumped me, but there's no need for name-calling.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 31 August, 2014, 06:06:57 PM
My advice to you, then, DDD, is to avoid population centres. Such as towns, shops, maybe even the connecting streets... anywhere people are going about their business on foot, there's a severe risk that they may be carrying a modest amount of baggage!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 31 August, 2014, 06:13:58 PM
Sorry for the double post, but I missed Sharky's post:

Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 August, 2014, 03:51:19 PM
Just screwy human nature - she probably fancied you but panicked.

Sadly, I doubt it! Well, not sadly, actually, as she was no oil painting herself. The sheer level of venom behind her words was breathtaking. Even the staff member who dealt with the situation commented to me that her behaviour was 'over the top'.

This is the thing that really disturbs me about that kind of behaviour, though:  if it had been from some stroppy 20 year old, I'd have given her some verbal back and thought nothing of it. But this girl looked to be in her late 20s, maybe even early 30s. And nicely dressed.

It's an attitude problem, pure and simple. This whole 'nobody matters but me' mentality that people seem to have been trained into, the casual disregard for how they make people around them feel - not just me, I hasten to add - several other customers looked pretty aghast at her behaviour... it's a dire indictment of modern values.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 31 August, 2014, 07:09:43 PM
Quote from: HdE on 31 August, 2014, 06:06:57 PM
My advice to you, then, DDD, is to avoid population centres. Such as towns, shops, maybe even the connecting streets... anywhere people are going about their business on foot, there's a severe risk that they may be carrying a modest amount of baggage!

yes, but when you enter a crowded building, or get on a bus or train, a polite person, who doesn't have that  " 'nobody matters but me' mentality" takes the pack off their back and carries it by their side rather than barging around knocking into people every time they turn around.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 August, 2014, 07:31:37 PM
If you put a loud clock in your backpack, or a digital clock on a countdown, or a few wires sticking out, then I'll wager fewer people will bump into you. Of course, you'll have to weigh the advantages of less jostling against the possibility of being gunned down in the street like a mad dog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 31 August, 2014, 09:03:14 PM
Had a similarly bizarre encounter on a train a few years ago. Sat down at a table that only had one youngish woman sat at it, reading a book and eating a sandwich. As I started to take off my bag she looked up and said pleasantly, 'Can you sit somewhere else, please?'

'Oh, sorry!' I said - my immediate thought being that I'd sat in the seat of her friend/travelling companion. I was already putting my bag back on and halfway to getting up as I added, 'Why's that?'

Her smiling face remained a mask. She blinked at me and repeated, 'Can you sit somewhere else?'

I hesitated in my seat, wondering if it was me or if the encounter had suddenly gone a bit strange. 'Why?' I repeated. Not that it really mattered, but a reason would have been nice.

Still the empty smile, increasingly fixed and false. A very long moment passed and she very pointedly said 'Sit somewhere else.'

I told her - politely but firmly - that I wasn't going anywhere unless she gave me a reason. Another long, uncomfortable moment passed, and then she said, brightly 'Fine. That's fine.' She made a great show of putting her book away, packing up all her stuff and leaving the table. Stood above me, she announced grandly, by way of explanation, 'I object to males.' And then flounced off down the carriage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 31 August, 2014, 10:34:17 PM
If you really want to see how ignorant people can be, try being disabled.  The stories I could tell!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 01 September, 2014, 03:45:11 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 31 August, 2014, 07:09:43 PM

yes, but when you enter a crowded building, or get on a bus or train, a polite person, who doesn't have that  " 'nobody matters but me' mentality" takes the pack off their back and carries it by their side rather than barging around knocking into people every time they turn around.
[/quote]

Yeah - really DIDN'T appreciate the tone or phrasing of that post, DDD, if I'm honest. JESUS CHRIST! This happened because I had my bag on my shoulder?! My half empty bag with a panda soft crumplezone?

No it didn't.

I've been bumped by careless folks in shops plenty of times. Do I turn around effing and blinding at them and then calling them 'ugly bastards'? No. Because that's beyond the pale. In this case, it wasn't even my fault - Somebody who genuinely wasn't looking where they were going bumped me, and I bumped Madam Cowbag. The domino effect!

You'll have to forgive my spikiness on this, DDD. But we're not all selfish, inconsiderate idiots. Try to assume better, eh? I think you're pretty cool otherwise. I actually DO do exactly what you mentioned in your post as a matter of course - it just happened to be the one time I didn't. Bad luck, and all that.


Looking at other posts:

Dark Jimbo - you did right there, I think. I'd have been tempted to make a retort along the lines of 'That's fine - I object to people who think they can dictate to others.' But only because I actually do! You give attitude, you get it back, after all.

And I've seen enough stuff to know broadly what you mean, Old Tankie. There used to be an old guy who would camp out in our high street in a wheelchair with a little Bontempi organ and a battery pack, who would play simple one handed tunes all afternoon. I remember walking past him one day, and two kids stopped next to him. One of them put his can of drink on the guy's keyboard so he could stop to tie his shoelace!

People are capable of a supreme level of ignorance. Sometimes it's amusing, other times it's soul destroying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 01 September, 2014, 08:06:04 AM
I have to say I agree that you shouldn't be wearing a backpack indoors - especially if it's crowded. I work in a public building and it's something I see all the time - people with backpacks turning around and knocking into people. If I wear a backpack I take it off when I go indoors and if I were in a coffee queue I'd probably shuffle it along between my legs.
Having said that, this girls reaction was totally out of order and I agree that the staff should have done something earlier.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 September, 2014, 08:15:25 AM
Put your coat over your pack and pretend to be a hunchback.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 01 September, 2014, 12:13:07 PM
Reading that back I realise I probably shouldn't have said anything. 
I should keep my opinions to myself and let HdE carry his bag however he wishes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 September, 2014, 12:42:12 PM
Sorry if my reply upset you, having read it back, my tone was rather snarky wasn't it, I apologise for that.

As a commuter, people wearing backpacks is one of my "hot buttons" I just find it really annoying when people don't take off backpacks, especially when, as you said in your original post, the place was crowded. I am in no way excusing this woman's terrible rudeness however. Your simple "oops, sorry" would have been all it would take to placate me if I'd been the one you bumped.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 September, 2014, 03:08:51 PM
sorry ,with ddd block on this one, the amount of times ive been smacked in the face just trying to get to work by people with backpacks is uncountable tis common courtesy and good manners to remove the bag when in a crowded place like a shop or on transport as I do when I have mine with me. its a no brainer tbh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 01 September, 2014, 03:16:24 PM
Meh. I wouldn't expect anyone to take their backpack off just to queue up. On the tube is slightly different but again, not expected. Easy solution is just to not get your face up in there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 03 September, 2014, 04:55:23 PM
One of my pet hate on trains, buses etc is when someone gets all territorial and fancies claiming one and a half seats. This sometimes manifests itself with the odd behaviour of someone with every page turn of their newspaper elbowing me in the ribs. Some geezer was doing that a few weeks ago. And doing it quite aggressively. I stared at him and he took his earphones off and blurted: "What, what, what?!!" He obviously knew what was what – he was pretty riled up. I reckon he took umbrage at the fact that someone (me) had sat next to him and he couldn't spread himself out as he does on his favourite armchair at home.

Me: "You're elbowing me?" Him: "There's no space? Where do you want me to go?" Me calmly: "Well you don't need to keep on doing that. Stop elbowing me." Went on a bit like that. In the end he said "There are plenty of seats elsewhere". Me: "Well help yourself then." Wallyish behaviour. 

I have to say though, that kind of behaviour is very rare on that train line as usually most people are very polite and considerate. Much more so that on the tube, even when it is crowded – in my experience of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 03 September, 2014, 08:09:49 PM
or the ones who dfeserve more than half the seat you're already sat on!  and theyre usually the ones who don't believe in exercise,laundretttes  or showers.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 04 September, 2014, 04:07:46 AM
A guy I work with - ostensibly my boss but not really - has installed one of those Dropcams in the office, so he can basically watch/eavesdrop on everyone even when he's not in. I know that he also has not clearly communicated this fact to the rest of the staff (not through deliberate concealment, just absent-mindedness). The bloody thing even has a builtin mic/speaker, so you will sometimes hear his disembodied voice when he could just as easily call or text.

Now, I find this a) an invasion of privacy and b) just a bit fucking creepy. Would I be within my rights to order it switched off until the office is empty, or perhaps organise a vote?
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 04 September, 2014, 06:57:48 AM
Quote from: radiator on 04 September, 2014, 04:07:46 AM
A guy I work with - ostensibly my boss but not really - has installed one of those Dropcams in the office, so he can basically watch/eavesdrop on everyone even when he's not in. I know that he also has not clearly communicated this fact to the rest of the staff (not through deliberate concealment, just absent-mindedness). The bloody thing even has a builtin mic/speaker, so you will sometimes hear his disembodied voice when he could just as easily call or text.

Now, I find this a) an invasion of privacy and b) just a bit fucking creepy. Would I be within my rights to order it switched off until the office is empty, or perhaps organise a vote?


While you're at it you could organise a sweepstake over how long it takes the first person to say 'If you've got nothing to hide, you've got nothing to worry about'.

I don't think I could work under those conditions, I'd have to put a bag on it or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 September, 2014, 07:32:24 AM
Wind him up - stage a false murder for the cameras.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 04 September, 2014, 07:33:41 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 04 September, 2014, 07:32:24 AM
Wind him up - stage a false murder for the cameras.
OH! OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Do it Radiator, that would be fantastic!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 04 September, 2014, 09:45:27 AM
QuoteAll usage of CCTV other than in a purely domestic context must be undertaken in compliance with the requirements of data protection legislation. As CCTV infringes the privacy of the persons captured in the images there must be a genuine reason for installing such a system. If installing such a system, it is required that the purpose for its use be displayed in a prominent position.

Employers may use CCTV to monitor the workplace for various reasons. If CCTV is installed in a workplace, the employer should use signage to inform employees of the location of the cameras and to explain the purpose for which they are installed. Under the Data Protection Acts, if your employer informed you that the CCTV cameras were installed to prevent, for example, theft from the workplace, the CCTV footage cannot be used for another purpose such as recording the entry and exit of employees from the workplace.

http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/employment/employment_rights_and_conditions/monitoring_and_surveillance_at_work/surveillance_of_electronic_communications_in_the_workplace.html


If he ain't actually your employer and this ain't actually a policy just some creepy guys idea, then could always drop a teatowel over it/put your mug down straight in front. Repeatedly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 04 September, 2014, 10:00:35 AM
And put the radio speaker next to it as well to cover office conversations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 04 September, 2014, 10:22:12 AM
Isn't Radiator in the US? Not sure of the laws over there but I believe CCTV is actually less prevalent than it is in the UK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 September, 2014, 10:40:51 AM
Cripes Radiator, that'd drive me crazy.

A fellow [redacted] works with has a Nannycam installed at home to watch his childminder during the day.  It's apparently neatly concealed behind a picture, and he keeps the feed running in a corner of his monitor.  He occasionally calls people over to show them things his kids are doing.  The poor woman has no idea it exists, let alone that an entire office is watching her.

I obviously understand the protective impulse when it comes to one's brood, but sheesh, who wants to work on Springwatch Live?.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 04 September, 2014, 11:15:05 AM
I'm really concerned with the nature of what these people are at. At the least it should be expressly stated that there is a camera in the office. The fact that someone feels the need to do this is unsettling from the sense of a positive office dynamic. This guy is no manager and frankly if any of my junior managers came up to me with a similar suggestion; I'd tell them in very blunt short order to get a grip on themselves and go and do the job they are contracted and paid to do!!! Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 04 September, 2014, 11:17:59 AM
Who watches the watchmen?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 September, 2014, 11:29:39 AM
Quote from: JamesC on 04 September, 2014, 10:22:12 AM
Isn't Radiator in the US? Not sure of the laws over there but I believe CCTV is actually less prevalent than it is in the UK.
Yeah and I'm fairly sure this sort of thing will vary from state to state so the lack of any Oregon based legal eagles might stymie him.

A cursory google suggests that it's acceptable in the main office but not the shitter and there would need to be a formal policy communicated for it to form the basis of any disciplinary action. Interestingly that's for video, recording audio seems to be a whole different ballgame and could make the employer guilty of operating an illegal wiretap!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 04 September, 2014, 11:32:55 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 04 September, 2014, 10:40:51 AMThe poor woman has no idea it exists, let alone that an entire office is watching her.
Agreed, but not just the nanny. I find it quite unsettling that there are people who are such control freaks that they need to have some way of monitoring their kids from the other side of the world .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 04 September, 2014, 12:35:01 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 04 September, 2014, 10:40:51 AM
Cripes Radiator, that'd drive me crazy.

A fellow [redacted] works with has a Nannycam installed at home to watch his childminder during the day.  It's apparently neatly concealed behind a picture, and he keeps the feed running in a corner of his monitor.  He occasionally calls people over to show them things his kids are doing.  The poor woman has no idea it exists, let alone that an entire office is watching her.

I obviously understand the protective impulse when it comes to one's brood, but sheesh, who wants to work on Springwatch Live?.


It's the Trueman Show!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 06 September, 2014, 02:52:22 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 03 September, 2014, 04:55:23 PM
One of my pet hate on trains, buses etc is when someone gets all territorial and fancies claiming one and a half seats.

I sat next to a young guy once who actually spread his leg into my space trying to push me to the edge of  my seat. He seemed to be doing it just for the amusement factor (judging by the smirk on his face).

Something else I find annoying is when people have an empty seat next to them but make it unavailable by either sticking their bag on it (Not an issue if there are plenty of other seats. I'm talking about when most/all the other seats are taken.) or sitting on the aisle seat.

To be fair the latter aren't always trying to claim both, they just prefer the aisle and are willing to move over if you approach them but it gives a negative "I want noone sitting next to me" impression. Okay I prefer not to have a stranger sitting next to me, but I wouldn't object to it or do anything to prevent them.

On the other hand when there are lots of two seats available and someone still sits next to you, I find that a bit irritating. But even then I wouldn't do anything.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 September, 2014, 03:18:52 PM
Pretending to be ill or mental is a good way to get a seat to yourself. Inviting strangers to sit next to you is also a good one but your invitation must be enthusiastic. Flatulence is a good deterrent as well, as is B.O. And never underestimate the power of muttering.
.
Me, I kinda' like it when strangers sit next to me on the bus or train - having no friends of my own, it gives me someone to talk to.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 09 September, 2014, 05:00:56 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 06 September, 2014, 02:52:22 PM
Something else I find annoying is when people have an empty seat next to them but make it unavailable by either sticking their bag on it

Major pet hate of mine - I will always ask people if they could move the bag, and most of the time they will move it. When they refuse then I ask if the bag has a ticket for travel and that usually works. The times it doesn't, or the times the initial request is ignored....then I just go ahead and sit on the bag.

Unrelated.....just had a 2.5 week break from work, on holiday with the family and friends in Orlando. Best holiday ever - kids loved it. Got back early Friday morning but couldn't sleep on flight back so jet lag avoidance plans were already up in the air. Ended up sleeping for about 5 hours on Friday but during the day and couldn't sleep that night, plus the kids were up a few times during the night so any attempts to sleep were interrupted. Same going into Sunday, and then into Monday.

Running on fumes before even starting work - and then get in to find out I've been scheduled for on-call support this week (Monday evening through to next Monday morning) I usually have problems sleeping during on-call weeks, due to not being able to relax, but got home this evening (Monday) and went straight to bed.....drifted off nicely around 9pm. And then get woken at 1:27 for an on-call engagement.....thankfully managed to pass it on to someone based in our Singapore office to work on, and was finished with that at 2:30-ish.

But can I get back to sleep? Can I fu.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 September, 2014, 11:26:40 AM
you probably don't want to hear how a lucky arrangement of shifts meant that I've just arrived at work after a solid blissful 10 hours sleep. I can also have a nice lie in for the next two days as I'm on lates. Ahhhhh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 09 September, 2014, 01:02:23 PM
Git  :lol:

Decided to head into work early soon after that post - got in, and I'm straight on to pick up that engagement back up from the guy I handed it off to. Still on the call right now, 5 hours later, and we've just had the eureka "We can prove it's not our software, and can prove it's your data" moment  :o

I'm going home early, and getting into bed the moment I get in the door.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 10 September, 2014, 07:14:50 PM
Coming down with a heavy cold and in the process of losing my voice, but far too busy at work to be able to take a day or two off...   :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 11 September, 2014, 07:13:10 AM
Dog has started to limp quite severly on her back left leg.

One minute she was fine, the next a limp and a sad look.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 12 September, 2014, 09:22:17 AM
Those poor dogs in Manchester, so low! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 September, 2014, 01:31:50 PM
Gah, both weekend days/nights of work cancelled at no notice, and less than a week's notice that my current contract will finish completely next Thursday, which basically translates to three days' more work and then nowt.  Oh, and let's not forget the traditional 'we might have some other work for you soon' sweetener: ooh yes master, thank you master.  Just pay me even one of my last three invoices and I'll feel better disposed to your notional largesse.

So here I sit with a buggered sleep cycle that leaves me awake until 5am and a mumbling zombie until midday, trying to find some replacement work.

There's a lot of good things about being your own boss, flaky clients are not one of them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 September, 2014, 02:32:09 PM
Bummer, Tordels :-(
.
Still, I'm sure a man of your calibre will soon get another shot. Best of luck, fella.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 20 September, 2014, 02:43:46 PM
Arr - utter shite there TB. You're an archaeologist ain'tcha?

Not very helpful I know but there's a ton of solid work going in the SW of England at the moment - I imagine the commute doesn't appeal though  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 September, 2014, 03:36:53 PM
Ach, don't mind me moaning, it's just one gig, but it's been a profitable, and if I'm honest, enjoyable one.  I also felt like I was doing a particularly good job in difficult conditions, a feeling reinforced by my co-workers' reactions, and as usual I'd unwittingly let it become a factor in unfamiliar feelings of self-worth, which we all know by now is fatal: do the work, take the money, you are not your job.

What's annoying is as contracts go it's been all-consuming (as in 7 days a week) and despite allegedly having my weekdays free (it was nights all week and days at weekends, ugh my head) aside from child-wrangling duties, I've neglected my tendering for other work, since despite my optimistic expectations I really hadn't the energy to take on other work at the same time and it was supposed to run for at least another month.  The clients have decided to take the shifts i was covering back in-house now, which is their prerogative, although a bit more notice would have been the decent thing: communication is appalling across the board, as is so often the case.  In fairness, they have previously offered me directly-employed work on the same project, but I want to keep my own nascent business going.

I already have some limited work lined up in late Oct/Nov and I have some small things I have to finish off, and after all this is the path I've chosen.  I'm sure another juicy plum will present itself soon, and if not I have a lot of neglected chores to do.  And some sleeping.

CFM, yes, the siren-song of SW England is much-discussed in these parts: many are tempted. I order my men to plug their ears with wax and tie me securely to the mast.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 20 September, 2014, 03:49:32 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 06 September, 2014, 02:52:22 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 03 September, 2014, 04:55:23 PM
One of my pet hate on trains, buses etc is when someone gets all territorial and fancies claiming one and a half seats.

I sat next to a young guy once who actually spread his leg into my space trying to push me to the edge of  my seat. He seemed to be doing it just for the amusement factor (judging by the smirk on his face).


The laying on of hands and saying 'you seem  a nice young man' while leaning into them works, well if does if you're as big and ugly as me, having said that few try in the first place  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 20 September, 2014, 08:24:47 PM
Our slightly un hinged next door neighbour has been engaged in criminal damage for some time letting car tyres down (both ours and the neighbours on the other side but nothing could be proved and it did stop when they put cctv up, but my wife had some solar powered garden lights around an arch over my daughters bench which suddenly stopped working, my wife today thought shed just need to change the batteries but found the wire has been cut..and after having the conservatory cleaned last week we had fence paint splattered all over the front and side. obviously we didn't see her do it but we know she did. shes not the approachable type and neither is her hubby. do we contact the plods or just draw a large penis on her lawn in weedkiller? your thoughts please?

.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 20 September, 2014, 09:29:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 20 September, 2014, 03:36:53 PM
CFM, yes, the siren-song of SW England is much-discussed in these parts: many are tempted. I order my men to plug their ears with wax and tie me securely to the mast.

I don't even know your real name but I'd happily put you up TB although - saying that it occurs to me that you have a family. BUT THAT'S WHAT GARDENS ARE FOR.

I'll go and get a couple of pop-up tents tomorrow and we'll get this show on the road!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 20 September, 2014, 10:26:51 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 20 September, 2014, 08:24:47 PM
do we contact the plods or just draw a large penis on her lawn in weedkiller? your thoughts please?

Out of those two options, contacting the police seems the best choice... although the weedkiller thing would be more amusing. Particularly if you brought it to her attention by blaring Sprach Zarathustra (http://youtu.be/3rzDXNQxjHs) from a loudspeaker nearby...


[spoiler]If I've actually given you ideas... please don't do that! I'd hate to think I was the cause of a neighbourhood vendetta![/spoiler]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 September, 2014, 06:43:24 AM
Buy them a bottle of moderate wine, go over and say something like "I have the feeling we're not getting along, I don't know why but we are neighbours and so I thought I'd make the effort to put things right," or something.
.
The best way to defeat your enemy is to make him your friend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 21 September, 2014, 05:09:17 PM
sharky,though you mean well, this would not work shes the isis of our street, we have kept ourselves to ourselves as had the other side to her she hides in bushes at 4 in the morning staring at the other neighbours house ,tells three year old trick or treaters to fuck off  and calls the council for everything and anything she can think of wether it be the neighbours at the end parking their taxi on the end of the street in front of their own house to us having a childs bed and cupboards on our drive awaiting the council to take them away ,shes tapped...seriously so. kimjung il or whatever hes called would be more open to reason.

and they did get moved on by the council after the neighbours petitioned at her last adress
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 21 September, 2014, 06:51:06 PM
Speak to your neighbours, call the council and the plods together. And next time you see her quietly say that you'll cut her ****ing head off if she does anything to your stuff again, then walk away with a big smile on your face.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 22 September, 2014, 10:52:26 PM
I'm attempting to transfer some money to a contractor for some work they did for us. You think that'd be an easy task, right?

Well apparently it's not in America!

After giving up on my bank's useless website, I decided to tackle the issue in-branch only to discover the only way I can make the payment is to write a cheque* and traipse halfway across town to pay it into a different bank. Cannot believe how difficult it is made for me to do something I could accomplish in three mouseclicks back in the UK, all because the person I'm trying to pay aren't with the same bank as me.

To top it off, I requested a new chequebook before I left the bank and was told I could buy 120 cheques for around £20. Yep, they make you pay for replacement cheques, and in totally ridiculous quantities! It suddenly clicked why the fuckers only gave me a book of ten to start off with. I told them to shove it.

Oh, and you also get charged for using any cashpoint that isn't one owned and operated by your bank. They also charge you (£20) not just for going overdrawn, but also £20 for every single subsequent transaction you make once you are overdrawn.

*I can't even remember the last time I wrote a cheque in the UK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 September, 2014, 08:26:39 PM
My doctor told me that I have the arteries of a 60 year old, which I think is pretty good considering all the crap I shoved through them over the decades.
.
I am now officially old. 


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 September, 2014, 09:42:36 PM
well, Happy Birthday to your arteries!  :P

I wouldn't put too much stock in these "user friendly" medical metaphors that doctors use. I get a full-on Bupa medical every few years through my job (one of the few upsides!) and last time apparently my lung-age had improved, despite me having taken up smoking again since the last one, when I'd been baccy free for about 5 years. As a non smoking 43yr old I had a "lung-age" of 48; as a 47yr old heavy smoker, my lungs have had some kind of re-juve because my lung-age is now 45, and I know (*cough*)that doesn't mean they're working better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 September, 2014, 10:18:17 PM
double post but I've just read Radiator's post .. glad to see things haven't changed since I was there in the mid 80s. I couldn't believe they didn't have cheque guarantee cards (remember them? I would have starved as a student without the ability to run up an unauthorised overdraft on a chequebook full of sub-£50 cheques.)

I got my cash in the US by cashing checks at the uni, but when I went to California for the holidays I discovered that my checkbook was as worthless as toilet paper out of state. I had to embarrassingly borrow cash off my hosts, which cost me almost double what I'd borrowed to wire it back to them once I got back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 29 September, 2014, 01:37:00 AM
I'm fuckin' sick. ME! I never get sick.

I've already missed three days of work because of this shit. The last time I missed a day of work was about a decade ago, and that was because I snapped my leg in half.

How do people deal with this? Where the fuck is all this mucus coming from*?

*EDIT: It's coming from my ears, nose and throat. My real question is; how is it possible that I am producing my own body weight in snot, earwax and phlegm every four hours?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 29 September, 2014, 01:46:42 AM
Quote from: King Pops
*EDIT: It's coming from my ears, nose and throat.
Maybe there's a specialism in that kind of thing?  :)

Anyroad, hope it's sorted soon KP.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 29 September, 2014, 02:49:12 AM
Quote from: Fungus on 29 September, 2014, 01:46:42 AM
Quote from: King Pops
*EDIT: It's coming from my ears, nose and throat.
Maybe there's a specialism in that kind of thing?  :)

Anyroad, hope it's sorted soon KP.

Don't call me KP. It sounds like I'm nuts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 29 September, 2014, 09:14:41 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 26 September, 2014, 08:26:39 PM
I have the arteries of a 60 year old

tsk, these serial killers and their trophies ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 September, 2014, 09:25:03 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 26 September, 2014, 09:42:36 PM
As a non smoking 43yr old I had a "lung-age" of 48; as a 47yr old heavy smoker, my lungs have had some kind of re-juve because my lung-age is now 45, and I know (*cough*)that doesn't mean they're working better.

When we were looking into further spawning some years back, an obstetrician informed my wife, then 37, than she had 'the reproductive health of a 15 year old'.  A quick glance around our local shopping center indicated that this was a Good Thing.

See if you can get your arteries' birthday in writing Sharky, they're almost up for a buss pass.  Your veins will have to pay full price, naturally.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 September, 2014, 11:30:02 AM
Heh - maybe I will apply for an arterial bus pass at that. OAP - Old Aged Pulminaries.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 29 September, 2014, 01:04:02 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 20 September, 2014, 08:24:47 PMobviously we didn't see her do it but we know she did. shes not the approachable type and neither is her hubby. do we contact the plods or just draw a large penis on her lawn in weedkiller? your thoughts please?

Don't go looking for trouble, let those whose job it is to deal with it do so.
There's an old adage that goes something like "thieves, above all else, fear they will one day be robbed", and it's especially true dealing with antisocial neighbours, who are usually the first to drop a dime when they encounter trouble.  The easiest resolution is just to return the favor - keep calling the police about criminal damage - or even drug use if it occurs - no matter how small, and petition your council to move them along elsewhere.  Don't get dragged into a vendetta with a mentalist, let them reap what they sow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 29 September, 2014, 05:00:09 PM
Quote from: Bear McBear on 29 September, 2014, 01:04:02 PM
keep calling the police about criminal damage - or even drug use if it occurs - no matter how small, and petition your council to move them along elsewhere.  Don't get dragged into a vendetta with a mentalist, let them reap what they sow.

The benefits system hotline is the passive aggressive's best friend. If she's claiming child/out of work/housing benefits and has a partner living with her or a cleaning job on the side, you can kick her where it really hurts. My cousin had someone do exactly that to her; she was pretty sure it was someone she'd mouthed off to about something unimportant, but there was absolutely no way to trace the complaint back to the grass*.



* obviously, my cousin shouldn't have been fiddling the buroo in the first place
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 29 September, 2014, 08:42:45 PM
Quote from: sauchie co-op on 29 September, 2014, 05:00:09 PM* obviously, my cousin shouldn't have been fiddling the buroo in the first place

Murderer and noted cunt David Cameron has declared that fiddling your expenses is no big deal, so who are we to argue with a man who almost won an election in a two-party race with a party people were sick of voting for?  He gave a billion pounds of taxpayer money away to private business in the postal service privatisation, making the 200 million he gave away to Universal Credit look like chickenfeed, so clearly your cuz nabbing forty quid extra a week to spend on fags and shoes from the expensive pound shop (which is what one would assume the poor spend extra cash on) is no skin off his nose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 30 September, 2014, 03:26:37 AM
Quote from: Bear McBear on 29 September, 2014, 01:04:02 PM
Don't get dragged into a vendetta with a mentalist, let them reap what they sow.

Too true.  Don't forget -- they have way more time (and energy) to waste on making your life hell.

The best solution is to distract them and make them point their attention elsewhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 September, 2014, 11:41:03 AM
all true thanks for the advice and I am a great believer in "they'll get theirs" which also applies to a colleague who is currently not propping up the m6 yet
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: atp on 30 September, 2014, 02:42:12 PM
Quote from: King Pops

Don't call me KP. It sounds like I'm nuts.

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Just fell off my bloody chair laughing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 September, 2014, 06:03:48 PM
Quote from: atp on 30 September, 2014, 02:42:12 PM
Quote from: King Pops

Don't call me KP. It sounds like I'm nuts.

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Just fell off my bloody chair laughing.

Only just got that.  Brilliant.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 September, 2014, 06:29:05 PM
do they still do kp nuts?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 01 October, 2014, 01:43:19 AM
Yes. (http://www.kpnuts.com/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 02 October, 2014, 09:53:31 PM
Just got threatened over FaceBook, over work related matters.  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 02 October, 2014, 10:09:43 PM
Facebook has strict rules about threatening people while using their services, so report the post or message and then inform your HR rep.  In order to help stop this kind of disagreement at work spilling into your leisure time, you'll have to find this person and fuck them up, but most workplaces are small worlds, so you'll only have to do this a couple of times.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 02 October, 2014, 10:12:12 PM
And people here dont talk about work one here, nice big escape!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 October, 2014, 10:34:50 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin
Just got threatened over FaceBook, over work related matters.

Be strong - we've got your back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 02 October, 2014, 10:50:49 PM
Here is the message Folks:

[spoiler]http:// i57.tinypic.com/szijur.jpg[/spoiler]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 03 October, 2014, 10:45:38 AM
links not working for me...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 03 October, 2014, 10:47:30 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 03 October, 2014, 10:45:38 AM
links not working for me...

There was a space in the link. But honest I don't understand what it say!

http://i57.tinypic.com/szijur.jpg (http://i57.tinypic.com/szijur.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 03 October, 2014, 04:51:47 PM
what is a "spaker"?  and how olds his girlfriend your messing with to be called that?!

seriously wot a dick ,get him reported/sued/arrested.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 03 October, 2014, 06:39:22 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 03 October, 2014, 04:51:47 PM
what is a "spaker"?  and how olds his girlfriend your messing with to be called that?!
seriously wot a dick ,get him reported/sued/arrested.

I presume he means "spakker".  Forget the report/sue/arrest -- get him an English teacher ... fast!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 October, 2014, 07:20:38 PM
Batsom, if you received that from someone you work with, and you're absolutely sure it wasn't intended as a friendly joke (not bloody likely), I think you need to report it to your direct manager or whoever handles HR crap straight away.  That's serious stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 03 October, 2014, 09:18:42 PM
He's the boyfriend of a lass from work, and it's ok now. He apologised on FaceBook.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 October, 2014, 11:53:13 PM
Can I find a (non-wool) yorkshire cricket jumper? Can I buggerry?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 04 October, 2014, 03:30:47 PM
Thursday after work I was standing outside a venue in which Simon Bisley and Rufus were doing live painting. I found out about it an hour before the event started. 

Couldn't go in as I had training/teaching that evening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 05 October, 2014, 06:22:10 PM
Just spent three hours waving a heavy hedge trimmer about to clear all the brambles at the top of the garden and then chopped down three small trees.

My forearms haven't had that good a work out since I bought that Cindy Crawford exercise video.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 October, 2014, 06:43:06 PM
Moving house to an area without Virgin ~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 October, 2014, 06:49:50 PM
Quote from: Banners on 05 October, 2014, 06:43:06 PM
Moving house to an area without Virgin ~sigh~

Inverness?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 05 October, 2014, 07:25:04 PM
Quote from: TordelBackInverness?

Crewe – not quite as photogenic(!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 10 October, 2014, 02:55:27 PM
Along some unanticipated repairs to my vehicle it seems that my arms are too short now as I can't read the the bill I was given.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 October, 2014, 04:13:24 PM
whilst having our conservatory roof looked at as it has been leaking we found out the reason being the panels are too short and haven't been attached properly...and it probably wont be able to claim for damage as its shonky workmanship.

on the plus side the cowboy who did it is divorced and living in a run down house after sticking his companies money up his nose,in his veins etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 11 October, 2014, 02:47:41 PM
And with morals like that, he's probably also responsible for the distinct lack of Virgins in Crewe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 11 October, 2014, 02:51:55 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 11 October, 2014, 02:47:41 PM
And with morals like that, he's probably also responsible for the distinct lack of Virgins in Crewe.

Male or Female?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 October, 2014, 03:18:41 PM
Only an amateur would ask that question...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 11 October, 2014, 03:28:18 PM
 :D :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 12 October, 2014, 08:00:47 PM
Because I bought a GCW Zero handheld console last week (for emulators and such) and I've wasted so much time and money trying to get the bloody thing to work since, I am this close to just smashing it to pieces with a large hammer while laughing maniacally.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 13 October, 2014, 09:32:36 AM
On a day when I'm running late for work*  the bus turned up even later. On the plus side that gave me time to slide-walk along the grassy bit the other side of the road and clean off most  the dogs-muck I'd unwittingly walked through while walking back and forth waiting for the bus. (I should probably to learn to stand still while waiting...) I'm a bit of a pacer....

*To be fair,  there are quite a few,  although I usually make up for it by working late of taking shorter lunch breaks. But it's a habit I need to kick...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 October, 2014, 01:53:59 PM
Unceremoniously dumped, just when it seemed to be going quite well.
As far as I can make out, there was no real problem beyond her being an even bigger commitment-phobe than me.
Ah well - form an orderly queue, ladies...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 October, 2014, 02:09:32 PM
Sorry to hear that, Noisy.  Dames, whatchagonnadoaboudit?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 October, 2014, 02:16:31 PM
I was thinking "Sulk for a few days then start auditioning for a replacement".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 13 October, 2014, 02:17:46 PM
Sad day as Missus had a miscarriage for 2nd time, in many months. we been planned it for while, she is fine. And we can't tell our families. so rare emotion, so hurt for me to awake of that. Sorry for tell stuff as here as need put it out of my chest as many of you not know me on Facebook etc.

so strangest that I need a hug!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 13 October, 2014, 02:21:22 PM
Jeez, that's awful, Goaty!
I have literally nothing helpful to contribute beyond "take care of each other".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 13 October, 2014, 02:31:01 PM
Aahh, mate - terrible news. Be strong and take care. x
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 October, 2014, 02:55:02 PM
Goaty I'm so sorry to hear that. I've been exactly where you are. Consider yourself hugged.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 October, 2014, 04:08:11 PM
Terribly sad for you and your partner, Goaty - take all the hugs you need.  Have too much experience of similar, as do far more people than we ever realise, and it's a dreadful thing to go through. But you will get through it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 13 October, 2014, 04:17:09 PM
Sorry about that, Goaty.  Hope you and your missus keep well, lad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 13 October, 2014, 04:29:37 PM
Goaty- that's terrible. Have another hug.

Noisy- you too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 October, 2014, 04:32:54 PM
Hugs, big and warm, to you both, Goaty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 13 October, 2014, 05:59:42 PM
Really sorry to hear that Goaty - unfathomably terrible news for the two of you. Many hugs from the Watts household are yours.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 13 October, 2014, 06:03:46 PM
Sad news goaty Hugs fi the huff
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 13 October, 2014, 06:13:27 PM
hugz from grugz as well
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 13 October, 2014, 06:47:38 PM
My Condolences Goaty to you and your Partner! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 13 October, 2014, 06:52:15 PM
Sorry to hear that Goaty. Just be there for each other at such a heartbreaking time, that's all you can do :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 13 October, 2014, 08:36:22 PM
thank you all, we are okay and stay strong, I means raw emotion not rare emotion! will try again one day. thanks again guys.

Sorry Noisybast for get dumped, you will be fine in few days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 13 October, 2014, 09:24:52 PM
Just been laid off
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 13 October, 2014, 10:18:08 PM
Thoughts are with you and your partner Goaty.

Here's another hug.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 13 October, 2014, 10:56:26 PM
Always have sympathy for my fellow forumites that post here, whether I reply or not.
Just saw your post Goaty, very, very sorry to hear that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 14 October, 2014, 03:30:25 PM
...and the worst part of it is*, she told me her dad was a 2000AD reader when she was a kid, so I gave her a Johnny Alpha action figure to give him when she went visiting a fortnight ago!




*May not actually be the worst part
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 14 October, 2014, 08:50:08 PM
Just got your post goaty take real good care of yourself and be strong for your partner. BSC,  sorry to hear of the lay off dude....get back on the horse as soon as you can. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 14 October, 2014, 09:18:03 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 14 October, 2014, 08:50:08 PM
Just got your post goaty take real good care of yourself and be strong for your partner. BSC,  sorry to hear of the lay off dude....get back on the horse as soon as you can. Z

Thanks man, just thanks!!! :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 October, 2014, 09:21:33 PM
Yeah, sorry to read that Batson.  Never a happy thing - hope matters change for the better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rogue Earthlet on 24 October, 2014, 01:11:08 AM
As this thread began with content intended to amuse, I thought I'd join in, hoping I'd cause a few chuckles. But on reading the posts from Goaty and Batson (my sympathies to you both) it seemed almost like bad taste to send a light hearted message. But after giving it some thought, and deciding that trying to make people smile is never a bad thing, here goes.

A Little Trouble with the Dead

We've got a bit of a problem in my neighbourhood, in that some of the dead have a habit of rising from the grave every now and then, and eating the living. I wonder if should try and persuade these hungry zombies that they should change to a vegetarian diet, as it's much more healthy, but if anyone's got any better ideas I'd love to hear from them.
It maybe that their just protesting about societies treatment of the dead, which is pretty lamentable. The popular media constantly portrays them as flesh eating monsters, so maybe they feel they might as well do that.  And they do face a lot of discrimination, as we can see from the fact that the dead are rarely given the chance to take up positions of responsibility, (the House of Lords is an honourable exception. They have a positive discrimination policy, with only people who are dead being allowed to enter the Lords. Or at least brain dead).
Speaking as somebody who fully supports the right of dead people to have equal rights, I'd be delighted to hear from anybody who shares my belief that we should strive for a society where the dead have equality with the living, in a fair, just, democracy! Particularly I'd like to hear from any readers who are no longer alive, and would like to share their thoughts with us.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 25 October, 2014, 02:50:51 PM
Last Sunday, whilst munching on a fistful of shop-bought toffee popcorn, I bit down on an un-popped kernel. There was quite a lot of discomfort and the sensation that I might have lodged said kernel between two molars. A quick prod with a fingernail to try and dislodge it produced a pronounced cracking noise and definite movement in the offending tooth. A couple of stiff drinks and off to bed, followed by a day of considerable pain before I could get to an evening appointment at my dentist.

Turns out, I'd cracked a perfectly healthy tooth from top to bottom. Being healthy, it required the dentist to attack my mouth with a procession of carpentry tools to try and remove it, only for him to finally declare that — although the really painful bit was removed — part of the root refused to budge and he would have to refer me to hospital to have it surgically extracted.

That was five days ago, and it still fucking hurts. Fucking popcorn.

Ow.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 October, 2014, 03:21:00 PM
Ouch Jim.

I recently bust a molar eating lentils. Or it could've been the bread. That tooth was previously broken when I bit an olive stone. I thought it would be a simple repair job. Not the case.

It amused me somewhat when the dentist told me that in this neck of the woods she regularly has to fix up teeth that have been broken when people have chomped on lentils and olives stones. She also works further out in Leyton (I think) and claims that most broken teeth over there that she fixes are a result of people biting on toffees.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 25 October, 2014, 03:54:31 PM
FFS Jim that's terrible as all balls.   :o

Now avoiding popcorn, lentils, olives, Oliver Stone and using my teeth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 25 October, 2014, 04:33:38 PM
Tooth ache is the worst kind of ache closely followed by ear ache.
You have my sympathies.

I've broken ankles, legs, wrists, arms, jaws, collarbones, and ribs and none of those compare.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 October, 2014, 06:28:47 PM
Tooth ace is worsend by the fact it's often accompanied by ear ache or head ache. Bloody nasty Jim, hope it's over soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 25 October, 2014, 07:31:32 PM
ouchy! I broke a molar on pizza (god knows what on!) the day before my wedding and spent the day trying not to cut my tongue on the sharp edge .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 October, 2014, 08:04:20 PM
Ouch, Jim. I deal with toothache using a salt water mouthwash. It can hurt like Hell for a bit, and you have to keep the mouthwash in your mouth, swishing around, for about half an hour (though you can spit and replenish), but it works for me. Oil of Cloves is another must-have for toothache.
.
In any case, hope you get it sorted soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 October, 2014, 09:08:34 PM
Ugh, hope that clears up for you soon Jim. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 26 October, 2014, 06:46:13 PM
You have my full sympathy.

Plus it's a universal law that toothache seems to only happen at weekends (especially Bank Holiday ones) when every sodding dentist is shut.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2014, 06:54:03 PM
Thank you, gentlemen! Your good wishes are much appreciated. I was going to ask that you bear with me if I seem more irritable than usual, but realised that no fucker would be able to tell the difference. :-)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 26 October, 2014, 07:12:46 PM
Definitely more on the irritating-but-not-worrying end of the spectrum...

....during cooking a big roast our oven just stopped working. Dead. Kapoof. We've no fuses, it's too late to go and find fuses and we're not even 100 percent certain fuses are the problem anyway...  a fuckton of food wasted >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 26 October, 2014, 07:16:27 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 26 October, 2014, 07:12:46 PM
Definitely more on the irritating-but-not-worrying end of the spectrum...

....during cooking a big roast our oven just stopped working. Dead. Kapoof. We've no fuses, it's too late to go and find fuses and we're not even 100 percent certain fuses are the problem anyway...  a fuckton of food wasted >:(

That happened to me once. On Boxing Day. While making dinner for my extended family - about 20 folks.

You have my sympathy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 October, 2014, 09:00:09 PM
Och that's a pisser.  Probably too late now, but see could your neighbours finish off the roast?  Even if they ate it too, it wouldn't be wasted...  We did this when our freezer died without our noticing, and managed to offload most of our defrosting/-ed food by going dooe to door.  People were very good about giving us stuff in return later on, not that that was the point.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 27 October, 2014, 12:11:29 AM
Clearly a lot chummier round your way than here TB ... we'd get scoffed AT here rather than it scoffed if you catch my meaning. Which is rather depressing actually.

Not all is lost as the meat was not meat (but fake meat and is therefore not in danger of going off) and the par-boiled veg can possibly be soupified but the brokeness still is a mystery...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 27 October, 2014, 10:00:57 AM
Could be the element in the oven has gone which may have tripped a breaker or blown a fuse also (if the hobs and fan have gone off). Replacing an element is dead easy - you can get the product number of the oven from a sticker that's usually on the side of the oven door, order a new element and follow a Youtube video to replace it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 27 October, 2014, 10:11:00 AM
Not dealing with my sudden and unexplained singledom very well. It turns out I was rather attached to this one.

Logically, I know there's nothing I can do about it and I should just move on. Unfortunately, my body and brain are ganging up on me. I'm not sleeping, I'm turning the whole thing over and over in my head, looking for even the vaguest hint of an explanation, and I'm producing industrial quantities of adrenaline, which is leaving me fidgety, restless and irritable. To put this in some kind of context: I've been to the gym four times in the last week, just to give me an outlet. It hasn't helped.

Also unhelpful is the sudden and prolonged disappearance of all my friends, who I could *really* do with going for a drink with. I had to make do with a poor quality work's do on friday, which just made me feel worse. You know it's been a particularly bad weekend when you're glad to get back into work on Monday morning...  :'(


*Edited to add: I have, at least, resisted the urge to contact her directly. I messaged her sister, to arrange to return some stuff and make sure she was doing OK. The sister - while not saying anything specific and sounding superficially sympathetic - made it very clear I should probably just go away.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 October, 2014, 11:12:07 AM
Ah Noisy man, that's grim.  Don't know what to suggest, except to track down your mates and force them into assisting you with achieving alcoholic amnesia, and wait it out: you know it'll get easier with time.  My sympathies in the meantime. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 27 October, 2014, 11:30:34 AM
Holiday time?

On your bill if needed, they can be fun too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 27 October, 2014, 11:52:59 AM
Noisy - you know I've been there and it ain't easy. I know it doesn't really help now, but it *does* get better. Hang in there, man.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 27 October, 2014, 03:19:13 PM
I know - the logical bit of my mind is saying "just suck it up and give it time - it will pass". Unfortunately, it's being bullied mercilessly by the wanky emotional bit of my mind. Arsebiscuits...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 October, 2014, 04:55:50 PM
Quote from: Noisybast on 27 October, 2014, 03:19:13 PM
I know - the logical bit of my mind is saying "just suck it up and give it time - it will pass". Unfortunately, it's being bullied mercilessly by the wanky emotional bit of my mind. Arsebiscuits...

Ritual of Kohlinar, that's what you need.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 27 October, 2014, 05:33:16 PM
You boys have better strength of character than me if all of these things are minor impediments. I'd be putting most of them in the Spugs thread.

Hang on in there and get better to all of you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 27 October, 2014, 06:10:17 PM
Noisybast, just make sure you look after yourself. I was in a similar position in my late twenties and almost drank and smoked myself into a very dark place.
My only advice would be to try to do something positive everyday - maybe revisit an old hobby or just do some volunteer work or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 27 October, 2014, 06:22:50 PM
I've been there and it's not a happy place.
I'm loathed to say it, considering your situation, but I was bang on lucky and after a few days of the split I got back with her (I was with her for 4 years before the break up). It lasted a few days (the break up),then I ran into her again and managed to convince her to give me a second chance.

Now married 21 years and been together (bar 3 days) for just over 30 years.

There is always hope. And where there is no hope there is always alcohol.

I have probably missed my calling as a counsellor.

Actually, best you probably ignore me completely.

I'll go away now but I know you will get better. We all do eventually.

Hugs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 27 October, 2014, 07:12:59 PM
Hey Noisybast,

It's ok to be sad.

Minky

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 October, 2014, 08:01:36 PM
Sorry, Noisy - I got no advice for you that isn't either obvious or condescending so I'll spare you that at least.
.
Not much I can do with that sort of pain other than sympathise and let you know that I understand. My best to you, Noisy, and the best of luck be yours as you move forward.
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 October, 2014, 08:36:14 PM
Been single all my life Noisy, so I wouldn't know how you feel. Sorry!!! :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 27 October, 2014, 09:33:30 PM
Oh Noisy that's terrible. Gutting to hear it but yes, you're not alone in the least - which should not trivialise your pain but rather allow you to embrace it. This will pass.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 28 October, 2014, 09:02:27 AM
Cheers all. I know there's not much I can do but ride it out. Pretty sure there's nothing I can do to change it. Despite having been (though I say so myself) an exemplary boyfriend, she appears to be an even better commitment-phobe. She dumped the last boyfriend in similar circumstances (flew home to visit family, dumped him when they got back).  I didn't go with her on this trip, as he had reportedly made the last trip a nightmare and she deserved to spend some time alone with her family and friends. It does seem to be a recurring theme, though. I just hope she doesn't end up describing me in the same way she did him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 28 October, 2014, 09:04:05 AM
Nice evening. We discovered a £900 bit of card fraud, the dishwasher is officially goosed and appears to have been leaking under the kitchen lino for a considerable amount of time.

Still, at least we have a kitchen etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 28 October, 2014, 02:32:35 PM
That is offically a crap night, worse thing is these come in threes  :-X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 28 October, 2014, 04:24:03 PM
We had to bin an entire freezer full of food this week, the wife left it open overnight and we didn't notice until later in the day yesterday.

I hate wasting food but we didn't realise we had half of it anyway as a lot of it was entombed in ice in the top two compartments, so not a massive loss and it forced us to do a well overdue defrost anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 03 November, 2014, 09:01:49 PM
Yes yes, it's a 'First World Problem' (yawn), and I don't want this to be an invitation for the Apple haters to crawl out of the woodwork, but....

What on Earth is Apple's reasoning for making the simple act of transferring music onto a device via iTunes such a fucking ordeal?

Every time I try to do it I get so frustrated and angry that I want to put my foot through the monitor.

I have two computers (one at work, one at home) with completely different media libraries, and just want to drag and drop music and podcasts between them. I don't want to 'sync'. I don't want to erase everything on the phone every time I copy some new songs onto it. I don't want to use 'iTunes Radio', whatever the hell that is.

I remember it being easy to manually manage content on older versions of iTunes and old-style clickwheel iPods. I mean, simply operating an iOS device is (for the most part) beautifully elegant and intuitive - I can only conclude that they are deliberately trying to make it as confusing and nightmarish as humanly possible for some reason. To try and force everyone to purchase everything on iTunes via their phone?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 November, 2014, 09:42:12 PM
I'm not happy with this general trend of apps just taking it for granted how to sort and display things for you. Or worse, hide the thing you have just created in some hidden away folder. Just because 90% of the population is too dumb to remember where they put things and to sort them logically, or can't   recognise which emails are part of what conversation you are having,  doesn't mean I am.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 04 November, 2014, 12:05:31 PM
Quote from: radiator on 03 November, 2014, 09:01:49 PM
Yes yes, it's a 'First World Problem' (yawn), and I don't want this to be an invitation for the Apple haters to crawl out of the woodwork, but....

What on Earth is Apple's reasoning for making the simple act of transferring music onto a device via iTunes such a fucking ordeal?


This. And transferring pictures too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 05 November, 2014, 01:57:37 AM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 04 November, 2014, 12:05:31 PM
Quote from: radiator on 03 November, 2014, 09:01:49 PM
Yes yes, it's a 'First World Problem' (yawn), and I don't want this to be an invitation for the Apple haters to crawl out of the woodwork, but....

What on Earth is Apple's reasoning for making the simple act of transferring music onto a device via iTunes such a fucking ordeal?


This. And transferring pictures too.

Dunno about the pictures, but isn't the music just a drag and drop affair from the library? And to get it in the library you just drag the mp3's from your folder into the library.

Not that I'm an apple fan or anything, but it's not that bad?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 05 November, 2014, 07:39:16 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 05 November, 2014, 01:57:37 AM
isn't the music just a drag and drop affair from the library? And to get it in the library you just drag the mp3's from your folder into the library. Not that I'm an apple fan or anything, but it's not that bad?

radiator continues ...

Quote from: radiator on 03 November, 2014, 09:01:49 PM
I have two computers (one at work, one at home) with completely different media libraries, and just want to drag and drop music and podcasts between them. I don't want to 'sync'. I don't want to erase everything on the phone every time I copy some new songs onto it

Every single person who owns an Apple device has thought exactly the same thing the first time they try to buy a song from their work computer. It's bizarre.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 05 November, 2014, 09:09:43 AM
I ordered Zenith Phase 1 a while back from Amazon.com. (I'm in England but it actually turned out cheaper for some reason.)

I kinda forgot about it for a while then saw posts on this forum and thought I'd better check on the order.

I  just checked the tracking information on Amazon.com. Apparently it was delivered 19 October! Which is nice... But...  I guess the word "phase" was more apt than I'd have though as it's not in my level of perception.

I wonder if they left a little card somewhere and the parcel is currently with a neighbour... Who is to last to pop it round.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 05 November, 2014, 10:16:40 AM
QuoteWhat on Earth is Apple's reasoning for making the simple act of transferring music onto a device via iTunes such a fucking ordeal?

I use a free program called CopyTrans - much easier.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 05 November, 2014, 11:30:27 AM
Can't you just drag stuff from one Finder window to another?
I've done it with photos on my Mac mini but I must admit I haven't tried it with music files.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 05 November, 2014, 11:52:51 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 05 November, 2014, 09:09:43 AM
I wonder if they left a little card somewhere and the parcel is currently with a neighbour... Who is to last to pop it round.

That should read "too lazy to pop it round" . Predictive text and being on a bus. That's my excuse.

And I notice what a great big moaner I appear in that post over something that's pretty negligible really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 05 November, 2014, 12:02:20 PM
QuoteI've done it with photos on my Mac mini but I must admit I haven't tried it with music files.

Funnily enough, using an iPod is much easier on a Mac. On Windows, you basically have to dump every photo onto your hard drive - no drag and drop.

Music you can do drag-n-drop using iTunes only - no direct to device - but Apple keeps trying to get you to sync, has made the interface much harder to effectively drag-n-drop and there are all kinds of headaches that occur when you switch between them. One of the reasons I never had an interest in buying an ipod, was happy with my USB-stick 4 gig MP3 stick-player. Then my dad upgraded and upgraded so I got one for free.... And barely listen to music now because of the hassle of moving stuff around.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 November, 2014, 12:18:47 PM
Quote from: sauchie tower on 05 November, 2014, 07:39:16 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 05 November, 2014, 01:57:37 AM
isn't the music just a drag and drop affair from the library? And to get it in the library you just drag the mp3's from your folder into the library. Not that I'm an apple fan or anything, but it's not that bad?

radiator continues ...

Quote from: radiator on 03 November, 2014, 09:01:49 PM
I have two computers (one at work, one at home) with completely different media libraries, and just want to drag and drop music and podcasts between them. I don't want to 'sync'. I don't want to erase everything on the phone every time I copy some new songs onto it
Every single person who owns an Apple device has thought exactly the same thing the first time they try to buy a song from their work computer. It's bizarre.
Had you posted this six weeks ago I would've snorted and told you I'd never had a problem with mine in the two years I've had it. Then the whole free U2 album led to me trying to download music which I'd apparently purchased to my local iTunes for the first time. Which resulted in a corrupted music library index and an iPod which wouldn't get past the second stage of verification to the bit where you can actually add files to it.

After two weeks of fannying around I had to give in, delete everything off it and start again. Fucking Bono.

I think the most irritating thing about iTunes is that it doesn't rescan your music library folder when you open it so you have to add new stuff manually. Oh, and it ignores any cover art you already have and makes you download it again. And it's painfully slow at ripping CDs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 05 November, 2014, 12:25:47 PM
I've kept well clear of all the music players etc as can't use em at work and my commute is so short it hardly seems worth it. However this may change soon and I'd love to get all my music on a device and create mixtapes etc, but looking at the above, i may give the whole thing a miss  :-\

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 November, 2014, 12:35:15 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 05 November, 2014, 12:25:47 PM
I've kept well clear of all the music players etc as can't use em at work and my commute is so short it hardly seems worth it. However this may change soon and I'd love to get all my music on a device and create mixtapes etc, but looking at the above, i may give the whole thing a miss  :-\
By and large they're really good. We're all just whining about minor impediments to using specific ones.

If you're not bothered about using it for other stuff like internet or apps then you should be able to pick something decent up cheaply. A few years ago, I had a Creative Zen one which was magic (and you just added stuff by plugging it into your computer and dragging files to the folder in explorer. No idea if they're still going.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 05 November, 2014, 01:49:38 PM
They are easy to use. My sony mp3 player used to hold 4 gigs of music and was managed just like any other file storage on a PC, and you could use the folders to sort things if you didn't want to have to faff around with metadata like Artist/Album.

My iPod is my portable internet, podcast and games system so it has other benefits beyond the music. If all I wanted was music I'd have refused the free iPod.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Noisybast on 05 November, 2014, 01:52:14 PM
I simply installed PowerAmp on my Android phone and never looked back.
Well, apart from that time my phone chewed up a 32gb SD card. That sucked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 November, 2014, 02:00:18 PM
I've had loads of i-tunes grief recently - I have been ignoring the "a new version of i-tunes is available" messages for ages (because I'm familiar with the one I've got and don't need any new features).

Inevitably, the i-tunes store stopped working after a while so I tried to upgrade. This turned out to be a lot more complicated than it should be, but after hours of hassle and help menus, I finally managed to download the updated version.

I now notice that my i-tunes shortcut icon has turned from blue to red - Have I accidentally downloaded Evil i-tunes by mistake?

Another general minor whinge - being so paranoid about losing music I've paid for I always answer yes to any prompt to save or backup - which now means that my library is clogged up with multiple duplicates of every track.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 05 November, 2014, 05:20:14 PM
My ipod fell out of the washing machine as I removed my clothes yesterday, so... that's the end of that.
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 05 November, 2014, 06:03:24 PM
That whole U2 thing kind of mildly irritated me too. On the face of it, it seems churlish to moan about someone giving you a free album, but there was just something kind of obnoxious about forcibly putting it in your library, like someone surreptitiously gluing a copy of Love Actually onto your lovingly curated BLU Ray shelf.

They should have just announced that it would be free for those that wanted it from the iTunes Store.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 05 November, 2014, 06:21:38 PM
I still use my trusty Creative Zen for my mobile music needs as, despite my phone having enough storage, and the Beats tech (lolz....) installed. Just can't beat the simplicity of drag n drop!  ;)
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Frank on 05 November, 2014, 06:22:02 PM
Quote from: radiator on 05 November, 2014, 06:03:24 PM
They should have just announced that it would be free for those that wanted it from the iTunes Store.

But then Boneo wouldn't have been able to say 81 million people (http://www.macworld.com/article/2824569/81-million-people-listened-to-u2s-itunes-giveaway.html) had listened to at least one song from their new album ... rather than say it was the first of their records not to go to number one in a quarter of a century.

Dan Dinnae Dare - try VIEW>SHOW DUPLICATE ITEMS to get rid of duplicates:


(http://i.imgur.com/UFXsZxV.png?1)


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 November, 2014, 06:49:30 PM
thanks - I think I tried that once and it brought up a huge list, but wouldn't automatically delete the duplicates - I began going through it manually, but it was a pain in the arse so I gave up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 07 November, 2014, 04:54:44 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 05 November, 2014, 11:52:51 AM

And I notice what a great big moaner I appear in that post over something that's pretty negligible really.

... and no longer pertinent. Zenith Phase 1 was waiting for me when I got home! A very nice quality albumn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 07 November, 2014, 08:06:31 AM
I quite like Love Actually.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 07 November, 2014, 02:01:37 PM
I've been promised a card for the gas meter three times over the last fortnight.  If there isn't one waiting for me on the mat when I get home tonight someone is going to die!  Of hypothermia.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 November, 2014, 12:17:44 PM
Well the last 48 Hours have been more than a bit shit. Starting with an anxiety attack at work, finding out I was working the maximum amount of time without getting a break (6 hours), then getting robbed at 19:00 last night when we where all in the house! 2000 quid worth of kit, gone. And another none stop 6 hour shift today. Fuck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 November, 2014, 12:38:22 PM
Anxiety attack and robbery-while-at-home, my sympathies, truly awful, especially the latter.  Terrible to feel unsafe in your home.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 08 November, 2014, 04:20:55 PM
Jaysus, Hawk! That's just awful. Hope you and yours will be okay. All the best to ye.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 November, 2014, 06:12:53 PM
That's one crappy day Hawkie. On the plus side, though your stuff was expensive it is only stuff - the world's full of it. So long as everyone's all right, that's the main thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 08 November, 2014, 08:09:18 PM
What Sharkie said Hawk. Stuff is only stuff. Very happy to hear everyone is alright. Still shitty though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 09 November, 2014, 10:09:03 AM
Bad craic thete Hawk, hope everyone's ok. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 09 November, 2014, 12:31:42 PM
Thank you guys. And yess, i'm hugely grateful it was just a robbery. As it is, two bikes and a bunch of tools can be replaced, but if anything had happened to my siblings (I trust my parents and myself are capable of looking after ourselfs if worst case scenario occures) I would have been incredibly angry.

Indeed, forensics indicated my brother might have been in the same room as one of the robbers as they hid. It's a sickening thought, but luckely he's none the wiser.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 November, 2014, 11:01:27 AM
Scary stuff - a horrid thing to happen. Hope you're all doing okay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 13 November, 2014, 12:51:06 AM
Bugger.  Just as I thought we were getting on OK after a turbulent period, the wife & I have agreed to separate after 16 years of marriage.  Amicable but still a bit of a bummer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 November, 2014, 03:35:58 AM
Sorry to hear that, AC, after so long that's very sad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 13 November, 2014, 09:02:03 AM
aye,sorry to hear that fella
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 November, 2014, 01:56:48 PM
Sorry to hear that AC. Must have been a very difficult decision. All the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 14 November, 2014, 03:52:41 PM
Truely sad to hear that A C. Regards Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 November, 2014, 07:47:26 PM
Sorry for your troubles, AC.  Can't imagine how difficult that must be.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 14 November, 2014, 10:17:28 PM
That's really sad. Very sorry to hear that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 15 November, 2014, 12:54:41 PM
Sincere thanks for the kind comments.  We've managed to keep things amicable, which is a positive.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 November, 2014, 10:15:12 AM
No paid work for a week now - so the advantage from those nice little earners a couple of weeks ago, which was going to go into a jaunt to Thought Bubble, has evaporated. A gentle reminder that my tenancy of the boat is only temporary. Something wrong with the dog - shivering, not eating, drinking a lot. After the initial investigating officer looking into my allegations of perjury thought I had a good point, his Higher Ups have decided there's nothing to see and so that's that. On top of that, I recently realised why it is that I've never really been able to love anyone, which kinda' made most of the last thirty five years seem like a whole bunch of wasted time.
.
Half-way through writing a nine part script - been preparing it and planning it for months, got the plot, character development, visual and desire lines, ghosts and needs, plot points, motifs, resonances, counterpoints and page breakdowns all planned out so all that remains is to write the actual script and put the dialogue in. There's too much dialogue at the moment but this is only the first draft and it'll be cropped and refined in the second. And the whole thing's going really well - storming through it. Then I start thinking about all this other crap and it breaks my flow. Stalls me. Steals my focus.
.
I can feel the Black Dog sniffing at my crotch and getting ready to jump up at me. I'm trying to bring the God damned thing to heel but it's bloody persistent and I'm bloody tired.
.
Bloody minor impediments everywhere I look. Still - chin up, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 16 November, 2014, 10:46:56 AM
Yep and after all of the above, things started to get bad! Never no mind Sharky, just damn the lot to hell and walk on. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 16 November, 2014, 10:59:50 AM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 16 November, 2014, 10:46:56 AM
just damn the lot to hell and walk on.

He's a shark — he has to just keep swimming. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7l_tFa4-5OM)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 16 November, 2014, 11:06:09 AM
 :D quite
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 16 November, 2014, 10:35:10 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 16 November, 2014, 10:15:12 AM
I can feel the Black Dog sniffing at my crotch and getting ready to jump up at me. I'm trying to bring the God damned thing to heel but it's bloody persistent and I'm bloody tired.
.
Bloody minor impediments everywhere I look. Still - chin up, eh?

Must be something about the time of year. I've also been aware of the Black Dog hovering on the periphery this last week or so. Things which have been ongoing for donkey's years but haven't bothered me one bit are suddenly seeming like good reasons for deep, black despair.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 November, 2014, 10:55:28 PM
Courage, lads.  Kick that mangy mutt in the goolies, then give him one or two extra for me. 

I can't quite decide if I've been lucky or not in this respect this year.  I've had way fewer depressive episodes than usual, and shorter, but the major one I did have, back in late July/August, was probably the most intense and scary I've had in some years.  I don't envy anyone that sensation of inexorably rising darkness, but as always you must tell yourselves that the things it tells you aren't true, and it will pass.  It's all just bollocks, and you'll know that when you're through the other side.  I know all too well that doesn't make it one jot easier to endure, but it's the plain truth.

Like Jim says, keep swimming.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 November, 2014, 11:50:09 PM
Aye, you're right. This tide has ebbed and flowed before and now it's sink or swim time again, that's all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 18 November, 2014, 06:45:10 AM
The installation of a new woodburner prompts anticipation of warm, cosy nights in front of a wood fire. Instead, the installers ding a gas pipe, shut off the gas and tell us they've called a plumber to fix it before fucking off for the day. The plumber never turns up, leaving us without heating or hot water overnight. Oh, the irony.

(Edit: Or, indeed, this morning. At least the shower's electric. Fasting blood tests, too, so nothing but water for breakfast for me. Bah.)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 19 November, 2014, 09:23:51 PM
Is playing "All You Need Is Love" at brain-meltingly high volume to your landlords who are having a massive domestic unnecessarily antagonistic?



We shall find out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 November, 2014, 09:53:32 PM
Not at all. When other people's noise intrudes into your personal space, the only reasonable response is to remind said people that you can also be intrusively loud.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 19 November, 2014, 10:25:13 PM
The stink from the downstairs flat has now started setting off the smoke alarms in the hall at random times, but on the bright side, I know the smoke detectors in the halls work - which is not to be underestimated as a plus when you live above drunkies who set fire to things at all hours.

BTW - if I stop posting here for more than a month, assume I have died in a fire.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 November, 2014, 07:45:58 AM
Why...are they setting fire to items INSIDE?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 November, 2014, 07:51:23 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 20 November, 2014, 07:45:58 AM
Why...are they setting fire to items INSIDE?!

In his drinking days my brother used to stagger in in the wee hours, stick a pan of baked beans on the gas and promptly pass out at the kitchen table, so that the fire alarm became a dear friend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 20 November, 2014, 11:16:04 AM
My long weekend of moving house and unpacking at the other end was hampered by passing a kidney stone.

So - who wants to know what a chunk of gravel inching down your urethra feels like? :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 November, 2014, 11:23:11 AM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 20 November, 2014, 11:16:04 AM
My long weekend of moving house and unpacking at the other end was hampered by passing a kidney stone.

So - who wants to know what a chunk of gravel inching down your urethra feels like? :D

Ouch - this happened to my flatmate at uni - we heard a blood curdling scream and found him passed out with the pain in the bathroom, so I don't envy you SM

I had a huge molar removed yesterday and the bugger did NOT want to come. Although I was anaesthetised, the tugging and wrenching was horrible and now I've got an aching jaw and a(nother) weird soggy gap in my mouth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 20 November, 2014, 01:37:18 PM
Passing a kidney stone is (no pun intended) a piece of piss - it's their side-effects that are freaky, like pissing blood for days, or feeling like a small corner of your abdomen is having a baby.

Quote from: TordelBack on 20 November, 2014, 07:51:23 AM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 20 November, 2014, 07:45:58 AM
Why...are they setting fire to items INSIDE?!

In his drinking days my brother used to stagger in in the wee hours, stick a pan of baked beans on the gas and promptly pass out at the kitchen table, so that the fire alarm became a dear friend.

I used to live with someone who would do that, and one day came down to a fire-gutted kitchen that no-one in the house knew anything about until they'd got up that morning.  Good times.
This is more or less what is happening downstairs, I think, though their frying pan seems to be another co-conspirator, as does their fireplace, which manages to blow soot and smoke into my living room despite my having the chimney blocked years ago and an electric fire installed.  My one consolation is that when they eventually do kill me, I probably won't know anything about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 November, 2014, 05:05:34 PM
First time deploying a site on Microsoft Azure, which is due to go live tomorrow, and the fucker is down. So, we can't test it and the client can't see it. This cloud you keep telling me about? Yeah, marvellous. Thanks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 November, 2014, 05:38:06 PM
Maybe the Sun came out?
.
(Sun Microsystems, Java, programming glitch, geddit? Oh well, suit yourself...)
.
My brother's split from his missus, leaving him stranded in a bedsit in London. So, both Mrs H's boys are now technically homeless. I bet she's so proud...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 November, 2014, 04:32:05 PM
the "see no evil,hear no evil,speak no evil" owls I bought for the missus' birthday next week have black marks all over the front of them ,hope I can get this sorted soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 November, 2014, 04:38:25 PM
Have you tried hoot polish?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 22 November, 2014, 05:04:19 PM
I recently updated my Nexus 5 Phone to Android Lollipop.

Then my phone started doing a weird flickery when receiving texts.

Also the Phone App crashes when I get incoming calls.

The first problem hasn't occurred since I switched off the LG G watch I had paired with it* - but then again it didn't happen all the time when the phone was active - but the second issue continued after.

I'm curious, if any of you have had any issues with upgrade?


*I think it's still a Lollipop issue since the there were no issues with the watch before the upgrade.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 November, 2014, 06:15:35 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 November, 2014, 04:38:25 PM
Have you tried hoot polish?

owl get yer coat
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 November, 2014, 04:41:19 PM
I called the Google helping line. First time, the guy couldn't hear me. On second call... he heard me but just after I had explained my problem... I ran out of credit.

l'm sure I had plenty of credit, so I'm guessing the 0800 number I used gobbles a lot more than usual, rather than being free like for landlines.

On the plus side I was a mailed Steps to help sort the problem out.

First step: Clear the cache, didn't work
2nd Step: Restart in safe mode - tried that yesterday. Didn't work, but at least I know it's not a 3rd party app.
3. Now I'm doing a factory reset. King that right now. I'm sure it doesn't actually reset the OS, it just wipes my files but we shall see...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 23 November, 2014, 08:05:29 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 22 November, 2014, 05:04:19 PM
I recently updated my Nexus 5 Phone to Android Lollipop.

Then my phone started doing a weird flickery when receiving texts.

Also the Phone App crashes when I get incoming calls.

The first problem hasn't occurred since I switched off the LG G watch I had paired with it* - but then again it didn't happen all the time when the phone was active - but the second issue continued after.

I'm curious, if any of you have had any issues with upgrade?


*I think it's still a Lollipop issue since the there were no issues with the watch before the upgrade.

I had a similar experience when I upgraded to lollipop on my Nexus 7, 2012 version. Had to rewind to previous update to get it working again.... :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 November, 2014, 09:10:49 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 23 November, 2014, 08:05:29 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 22 November, 2014, 05:04:19 PM
I recently updated my Nexus 5 Phone to Android Lollipop.

Then my phone started doing a weird flickery when receiving texts.

Also the Phone App crashes when I get incoming calls.

The first problem hasn't occurred since I switched off the LG G watch I had paired with it* - but then again it didn't happen all the time when the phone was active - but the second issue continued after.

I'm curious, if any of you have had any issues with upgrade?


*I think it's still a Lollipop issue since the there were no issues with the watch before the upgrade.

I had a similar experience when I upgraded to lollipop on my Nexus 7, 2012 version. Had to rewind to previous update to get it working again.... :(

I've read about issues with Nexus 7 too. (I used to have one too, by the way, but I sold it when I got my Kindle Fire HD X ). I understand downgrading the OS is a bit of a pain.

Anyhow, resetting my phone to factory settings has done the trick so far. I'm glad I didn't have to downgrade the OS. Despite the issues I've had, its quite nice...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 23 November, 2014, 09:29:50 PM
Is a bit of a pain to do. Had to wipe it and download an older version of Android for it. Not too difficult, but long winded and completed avoidable, if they'd only tested it properly. Must admit, it did LOOK cool, though....☺
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 23 November, 2014, 10:19:34 PM
I've had it on my Nexus 7 (2013) for a few days now and its been pretty flawless so far, a little faster than before too. My only issue with it is the way you now close apps being a little clunkier than the previous version.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 November, 2014, 10:50:52 PM
Yeah I'm not sure putting browser tags and apps in the same place was a good idea. It can be switched off though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 24 November, 2014, 01:25:49 PM
Azure sorted. Website went live this morning. However, the home page design prominently features a video hosted at Vimeo, which – for some reason – the client has now deleted.

~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 24 November, 2014, 05:17:03 PM
went to a keeping in touch meeting at work as I have been off a while for depression/anxiety and have been told I'm being investigated for a number of allegations ranging from nicking off work to breaching confidentiality and basically putting my patients at risk! obviously feeling shit anyway but to have that thrown at you especially as they wont tell me what I'm supposed to have done or whos said it. I have an idea who the main instigator is and it smacks of a witch hunt cos my face doesn't fit in the persons little gang ...so now I feel even worse and stabbed in the back since I have been there 17 years and all of a sudden in the six weeks I was in I suddenly became a danger and unprofessional .
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 November, 2014, 05:59:18 PM
That's terrible stuff, Grugz.  You should have been informed in advance of the content of a meeting where disciplinary issues were going to be raised prior to attending, and been given the opportunity to bring someone with you, be it union rep (if you have one), solicitor or just sympathetic witness.  I know it's no consolation at all, but if you have medical certification for your depression/anxiety this sort of behaviour on the part of your colleagues will look very bad should matters ever come to law.

Something vaguely similar happened to me the first time I was ever absent from work due to severe depression (I didn't even know that's what it was at the time) - after 7 years of 6-7 day 70 hour weeks, certain colleagues set about systematically and publicly blaming me for pretty much everything, including things that had happened during my absence.  In the event I was able to sort things out when I returned, and the colleagues in question 'moved on', although they left a colossal mess. 

I know that it may be impossible when your head is where it is, but try to remember that these are only allegations - you have to be given an opportunity to defend yourself, and that the burden of proof is on them.  Further, that you can only really address this sort of thing when you get yourself well, so don't further stress yourself about dealing with it now.  It's also worth remembering that it can be tough for colleagues to deal with long absences, and it's possible that some of what you're hearing may be just their frustration filtered through your own state of mind: hence the importance of having an ally with you at meetings like that
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 November, 2014, 06:41:33 PM
That's awful, Grugz. I can't add much to what Tordels says except maybe to insist that the allegations are put in writing, supported by evidence and signed by your accuser/s. It's amazing how fast these things can disappear when you start asking people to take personal responsibility for their own actions. (It also hints that you have taken legal advice, which makes 'em sweat.)
.
Of course, none of that matters much at the moment - the priority is for you to get well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 November, 2014, 07:23:41 PM
What Tordel and Shark said buddy. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 24 November, 2014, 08:09:53 PM
cheers fellas
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 December, 2014, 12:06:45 PM
The heating's packed up on the boat and it's fuh-fuh-fuh-fuh-fuh-fuh-freezing :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 04 December, 2014, 03:13:29 PM
at least you have your new coat
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 04 December, 2014, 03:42:12 PM
Dogs are nature's handwarmers.

Grugz: don't underestimate social media as a way to shame your accusers.  A mention of their behavior in a Facebook post where their family can see it can shock people who prefer to conduct whispering campaigns, though obviously don't start stalking them or anything - just let them know you're not afraid of conducting a public conversation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 05 December, 2014, 12:59:23 AM
Christmas music. Fuckin' Christmas music. Fuckin' everywhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 05 December, 2014, 08:16:57 AM
Quote from: King Pops on 05 December, 2014, 12:59:23 AM
Christmas music. Fuckin' Christmas music. Fuckin' everywhere.

Well, it is December!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 05 December, 2014, 08:26:02 AM
Quote from: King Pops on 05 December, 2014, 12:59:23 AM
Christmas music. Fuckin' Christmas music. Fuckin' everywhere.

That's almost "Jingle Bells" right there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 05 December, 2014, 05:46:42 PM
Last week I needed a new back box, and today, my passenger side window broke, leaving my car open to the elements.

Not gonna be able to get it fixed until Monday, but at least the Garage have it stored safely at their place 'til then.

Then there's the bill to sort out. Bloody cars, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 December, 2014, 06:05:56 PM
Apparently my brother has bought me a head-torch for Xmas - to add to the three that I already own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 05 December, 2014, 09:50:32 PM
Planning to go to the Steve yeowell signing tomorrow and really looking forward to it. Looked for my sketch book hoping he'll be adding to it and it appears to have gone missing during my house move earlier this year
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 09 December, 2014, 07:54:47 AM
Quote from: King Pops on 05 December, 2014, 12:59:23 AM
Christmas music. Fuckin' Christmas music. Fuckin' everywhere.

I feel your pain. I'm so glad I don't work in retail or fast food anymore. They pump that shite through the speakers all day. When I had to pull an open and close on the same day in Macdonalds I had 16 hours of the same Xmas CD on a loop. It drove me batshit insane, and drove every last vestige of Xmas 'cheer' from me forever.

There is only one CD of Xmas songs I can tolerate now, and that's the Reverend Horton Heat's 'Three Kings'. Rockabilly Xmas music!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 December, 2014, 07:51:59 AM
Just waited a frikkin' hour and more to get 3 frikkin' pallets un-frikkin'-loaded.  I could've lifted them off quicker on the end of my cock - and it's not even a big cock - so now, hello rush-hour and the rest of the trip's going to be as awkward as a rubber pig. Grrr.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 December, 2014, 11:31:07 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 16 December, 2014, 07:51:59 AM...as awkward as a rubber pig.

Sex, sex, sex...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Skullmo on 16 December, 2014, 11:51:26 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 24 November, 2014, 05:17:03 PM
went to a keeping in touch meeting at work as I have been off a while for depression/anxiety and have been told I'm being investigated for a number of allegations ranging from nicking off work to breaching confidentiality and basically putting my patients at risk! obviously feeling shit anyway but to have that thrown at you especially as they wont tell me what I'm supposed to have done or whos said it. I have an idea who the main instigator is and it smacks of a witch hunt cos my face doesn't fit in the persons little gang ...so now I feel even worse and stabbed in the back since I have been there 17 years and all of a sudden in the six weeks I was in I suddenly became a danger and unprofessional .

Sounds like, because you have been off, they are trying to use other reasons to get rid of you or to make you quit.   I have seen his happen a few times to people on long term sick.

Contact your Citizens Advice Bureau and ask for help, they are very good. Explain to them that the did  not inform you before the meeting or allow you to be represented/accompanied.

These things usually work with an initial meeting, a meeting to present facts/discuss, and a decision meeting.

Good luck and don't worry too much!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 16 December, 2014, 11:57:09 AM
cheers mo, unions are involved I'm still waiting for my investigation interview when I hope i'll find out what I'm supposed to have done and by whom. I've done upset and distraught and now I'm just mad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 18 December, 2014, 12:08:51 AM
I had last weekend down as my chance to work on advent calendar piece. A two page strip that I wrote last year. It bears an uncanny resemblance to one entry in this years comp but that's not the point.

But I got bogged down with some super low paid work for some other people. Semi favour work. It took much longer than expected. Turns out they haven't bothered putting it on their website. So it wasn't needed in a hurry then. I could've spent my time doing my own stuff: drawing for the art comp. And done the supposed rush work afterwards.

Pisses me off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 18 December, 2014, 05:24:19 AM
QuoteBut I got bogged down with some super low paid work for some other people. Semi favour work. It took much longer than expected. Turns out they haven't bothered putting it on their website. So it wasn't needed in a hurry then. I could've spent my time doing my own stuff: drawing for the art comp. And done the supposed rush work afterwards.

Every client I work with tell me it's super-urgent-panic-stations-must-get-done-by-this-date etc, which can often entail me having to working late nights and weekends to meet the insane deadline.

Lo and behold, the same work comes back two weeks later for further amends.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 December, 2014, 08:44:04 AM
Amen to that, Brother.

Also, it's the clients who repeatedly use words in their emails like URGENT and ASAP who always seem to pay late.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 December, 2014, 10:20:12 AM
Ugh, yeah.  My favourite this year is a County Council who URGENTLY required me to take out not-inexpensive insurance ASAP in order to be eligible for a job way back in November of 2013.  The job then didn't actually start until March 2014, meaning 4-5 months of that insurance was effectively a complete waste, and then it promptly stopped after a couple of weeks due to 'site issues'.  They won't pay me for the work I've already done until the project is completed (as if their deadbeat contractors are my fault), but they don't know when that'll actually be - sometime in 2015 "hopefully".  Meanwhile I've just had to renew the insurance policy, which was used for a total of 6 (so far unpaid) days. 

But boy was it URGENT 13 months ago.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2014, 11:25:30 AM
One of my two front teeth (a crown) snapped off yesterday. Looking forward to a gappy Christmas!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 December, 2014, 11:30:02 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2014, 11:25:30 AM
One of my two front teeth (a crown) snapped off yesterday. Looking forward to a gappy Christmas!

Have I got the song for you...


(And sympathy, of course).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 December, 2014, 11:38:31 AM
You should charge extra for urgent jobs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 18 December, 2014, 11:54:23 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 18 December, 2014, 11:30:02 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2014, 11:25:30 AM
One of my two front teeth (a crown) snapped off yesterday. Looking forward to a gappy Christmas!
Have I got the song for you...

Ha!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 22 December, 2014, 07:47:35 AM
My youngest son was due to the the star in his nursery play, "The Star Who Lost His Shine", this morning.

Until he woke up with chicken pox.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 22 December, 2014, 07:59:15 AM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 22 December, 2014, 07:47:35 AM
My youngest son was due to the the star in his nursery play, "The Star Who Lost His Shine", this morning.

Until he woke up with chicken pox.
Ug, that sucks. My boy had that last March. He was actually ok with it. Well, better than I was at least. I got it two weeks later and it was evil and lasted six weeks.

Hope he gets better soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 22 December, 2014, 10:40:08 AM
Quote
You should charge extra for urgent jobs.

I've started doing that; or sometimes just flat-out refusing to do it.  Some people seem to think I'm constantly looking at my phone, desperately waiting for work to come in.


QuoteBut I got bogged down with some super low paid work for some other people. Semi favour work. It took much longer than expected. Turns out they haven't bothered putting it on their website.

I've been burnt with that many, many times.  I've stopped doing it.  For some reason, people seem to think artists and illustrators are delighted to work for next to nothing, if not for free.  My new rule of thumb is to ask them this:  Would you expect a plumber, electrician or mechanic to drop their prices that much? Would you do your job for me at that price?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 December, 2014, 10:46:41 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2014, 11:25:30 AM
One of my two front teeth (a crown) snapped off yesterday. Looking forward to a gappy Christmas!

went to dentist on Saturday and it's not a simple re-fitting, needs root canal work and a whole new crown. He  seemed amazed that the nerve was still alive - he jabbed something into it and I nearly leaped off the chair. Between then and now it's been agony, I've had a weekend of soft foods, co-codamol and clove oil, but I'm going back today to get rest of root removed and a temporary crown to see me through till new year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 22 December, 2014, 12:54:55 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 December, 2014, 10:46:41 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2014, 11:25:30 AM
One of my two front teeth (a crown) snapped off yesterday. Looking forward to a gappy Christmas!

went to dentist on Saturday and it's not a simple re-fitting, needs root canal work and a whole new crown. He  seemed amazed that the nerve was still alive - he jabbed something into it and I nearly leaped off the chair. Between then and now it's been agony, I've had a weekend of soft foods, co-codamol and clove oil, but I'm going back today to get rest of root removed and a temporary crown to see me through till new year.

Sorry to hear that DDD, shitty time of year for it to happen too.
Hopefully you get sorted today (if even temporarily) for the xmas period.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 December, 2014, 01:02:26 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 December, 2014, 10:46:41 AM
Between then and now it's been agony, I've had a weekend of soft foods, co-codamol and clove oil, but I'm going back today to get rest of root removed and a temporary crown to see me through till new year.

*shudder* As someone experience some dental distress at the moment, you have my particular sympathies...

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 December, 2014, 01:14:08 PM
Cripes DDD, that sounds absolutely ghastly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 22 December, 2014, 01:22:49 PM
Bah! Lost my keys.

Actually not so bothered about the keys, more about the Dredd badge keyring that was attached to them. That big chunky metal one. Drokk it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Ardath Bey on 22 December, 2014, 02:00:26 PM
Starting my Christmas vacation with a trip to my attorney to iron out the final details of my divorce.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 December, 2014, 02:06:01 PM
just back from dentist - despite the anaesthetic, it was very painful as he scraped out the remains of the root, but the worst thing is, he's put me on antibiotics and told me not to drink! I've told him I'm having a day off (or rather 'on') at Xmas.

At least I've got a temporary crown so i don't look like a tramp, but it's a bit wonky which means when I bite together my lower teeth catch the temporary crown first, which at the moment is very sore - hopefully that will die down a bit.

EDIT - having read Ardath's post however, I'll put up with a bit of toothache. You have my sympathies
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 December, 2014, 03:10:16 PM
Quote from: Ardath Bey on 22 December, 2014, 02:00:26 PM
Starting my Christmas vacation with a trip to my attorney to iron out the final details of my divorce.

Ouch, that is pretty crappy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Skullmo on 22 December, 2014, 03:12:24 PM
Wanted to listen to Taylor Swift on Spotify, and then remembered she had taken all her songs off!

Just to put all your issues in perspective!



>:(

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Skullmo on 22 December, 2014, 03:13:05 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 December, 2014, 03:10:16 PM
Quote from: Ardath Bey on 22 December, 2014, 02:00:26 PM
Starting my Christmas vacation with a trip to my attorney to iron out the final details of my divorce.

Ouch, that is pretty crappy.

:-(

Hopefully next Christmas will be a lot better!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 22 December, 2014, 03:48:55 PM
Quote from: Ardath Bey on 22 December, 2014, 02:00:26 PM
Starting my Christmas vacation with a trip to my attorney to iron out the final details of my divorce.

That is terrible. All the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 December, 2014, 04:56:48 PM
Hope your poorly tooth doesn't give you too much gyp over the festive period, DDD.
.
Best wishes to you also, AB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 December, 2014, 05:45:35 PM
my  daughter has got a stinking cold and cough with a high temp 3 days before xmas  :(

and I'm having a bugger of a time getting my xbox to work after I got a 120gb hdd to replace the inadequate 20gb one ,just int  middle of formatting it to see if that works.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 22 December, 2014, 06:37:45 PM
Make the most of this Grugz, one day you'll look back fondly on times such as these. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 December, 2014, 07:37:48 PM
I just wish the lass would stop growing shes 9 but in teenager size clothes ,she wants to be a vet but a career in the harlem globetrotters could be another option.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 December, 2014, 09:37:52 PM
and the hard drive is corrupted according to xbox support so that's a trip into town after the sales...bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 24 December, 2014, 02:56:45 AM
I've just spent ten minutes trying to upload a photo to the 2000ad Facebook page. It's the toilet doors from a pub in Whitechapel that's papered with prog covers. They've probably seen it before and I can't remember the name. It's still bloody annoying though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 24 December, 2014, 02:24:59 PM
Don't know that one, but if you're ever near Soho Square then check out the Crobar and its walls.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 December, 2014, 02:40:24 PM
If youre in Belfast check out the upstairs of the Hudson Bar, It is papered with covers from the old 2000ad monthly. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 December, 2014, 04:26:33 PM
Just finished work. Back in again 2am Boxing Day. Harrumph :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 24 December, 2014, 04:35:34 PM
Ah well, at least you get the big day off. Where are you working these days anyway?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 December, 2014, 05:05:11 PM
True. Local transport firm driving little waggons and vans. It's okay and it's not hard work, just crappy hours.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 December, 2014, 06:13:12 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 24 December, 2014, 04:26:33 PM
Just finished work. Back in again 2am Boxing Day. Harrumph :-(

Bloody hell lad, that's a bit harsh.  I sincerely hope they're piling on the double-time for that one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 24 December, 2014, 06:13:51 PM
Glad to hear you've got a job you're happy with anyway.... enjoy your day off and Merry Christmas!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 December, 2014, 06:44:02 PM
I'm not that fussed about Christmas any more, really. So long as I get to see Dr Who and scrounge a couple of roasties, that's good enough for me.
.
Thanks, chaps - and a very Merry Christmas to ye!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 04 January, 2015, 09:25:37 PM
Oh fuck! That they will block Netflix viewers if they watch US version of Netflix on International DNS, which I did, bye bye Netflix USA as they got all films & TV series in Subtitles which UK version dont got! :(

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/netflix-is-blocking-international-streamers-who-use-vpns-to-access-the-us-version-9956469.html (http://"http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/netflix-is-blocking-international-streamers-who-use-vpns-to-access-the-us-version-9956469.html")
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 06 January, 2015, 07:33:46 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 04 January, 2015, 09:25:37 PM
Oh fuck! That they will block Netflix viewers if they watch US version of Netflix on International DNS, which I did, bye bye Netflix USA as they got all films & TV series in Subtitles which UK version dont got! :(

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/netflix-is-blocking-international-streamers-who-use-vpns-to-access-the-us-version-9956469.html (http://"http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/netflix-is-blocking-international-streamers-who-use-vpns-to-access-the-us-version-9956469.html")

That's really annoying, I only just got a fast enough internet connection to be able to make streaming viable and Netflix along with UnblockUS was on my shopping list  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 06 January, 2015, 07:53:12 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 06 January, 2015, 07:33:46 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 04 January, 2015, 09:25:37 PM
Oh fuck! That they will block Netflix viewers if they watch US version of Netflix on International DNS, which I did, bye bye Netflix USA as they got all films & TV series in Subtitles which UK version dont got! :(

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/netflix-is-blocking-international-streamers-who-use-vpns-to-access-the-us-version-9956469.html (http://"http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/netflix-is-blocking-international-streamers-who-use-vpns-to-access-the-us-version-9956469.html")

That's really annoying, I only just got a fast enough internet connection to be able to make streaming viable and Netflix along with UnblockUS was on my shopping list  :(.

Not only is this not true, it seems it originated from a torrent site... I wonder why they'd do that..?

http://www.theguardian.com/technology/2015/jan/05/netflix-denies-crackdown-on-vpn-users#comment-45792795
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 06 January, 2015, 08:26:21 PM
I like Netflix UK, so this makes no odds to me.

However, I would like to applaud Mr Clements for his retort to the pro-BitTorrent commenter on that Grauniad page. Bravo!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 06 January, 2015, 09:49:26 PM
But sadly factually inaccurate, as copyright violation isn't theft, it's a violation of archaic rights to reproduce work that the law hasn't updated to remain relevant to emergent technologies.  Apple and Netflix have proved people are happy to pay for stuff they can get for free via torrents, the various creative industries just have to stop playing the victim and work for their buck like everyone else.

Also stay off the Guardian comments section, Richmond.  I commented there once and felt dirty immediately afterwards, like I'd been dragged into a slanging match with some kids whilst passing their schoolyard at playtime.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 07 January, 2015, 12:01:52 AM
Quote from: Bear (PhD) on 06 January, 2015, 09:49:26 PM
Also stay off the Guardian comments section, Richmond.  I commented there once and felt dirty immediately afterwards, like I'd been dragged into a slanging match with some kids whilst passing their schoolyard at playtime.

It gets weird in there - as much as I'd like to think that participating in forums makes you develop an understanding that there are 'characters' that delight in rubbing people up the wrong way in every community  - some of the commenters there defy logic (although my brother's partner once asserted (wrongly I think) that the Guarbian's comment section was "worse than the Daily Heil's"!!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 07 January, 2015, 11:22:45 AM
It's well-known that the Mail's readers camp out in the Guardian comments section to make ad hominem attacks on the paper, the paper's columnists, liberals, and women - when there's an article written by someone who falls into the latter three categories, note the increased hostility compared to the comments section of articles by male journalists.
There are some liberal commentators on the DM website, but they're largely redundant as the comments by default sort by which have been best-received, so the result is that the comments seem reasonable enough to begin with but get progressively more mad the further you read.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 01:21:32 PM
Quote from: Bear (PhD) on 06 January, 2015, 09:49:26 PM
But sadly factually inaccurate, as copyright violation isn't theft, it's a violation of archaic rights to reproduce work that the law hasn't updated to remain relevant to emergent technologies.  Apple and Netflix have proved people are happy to pay for stuff they can get for free via torrents, the various creative industries just have to stop playing the victim and work for their buck like everyone else.

Whilst I agree with you about the need for technological catchup, I don't agree that copyright violation isn't theft. Creators are people too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 07 January, 2015, 01:25:00 PM
Quote from: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 01:21:32 PM
I don't agree that copyright violation isn't theft. Creators are people too.

It's not theft. In the same way theft isn't murder, and burglary isn't mugging. You may think copyright violation and theft are equivalent but they're not the same and it's factually inaccurate to say that it is.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 03:03:01 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 07 January, 2015, 01:25:00 PM

It's not theft. In the same way theft isn't murder, and burglary isn't mugging. You may think copyright violation and theft are equivalent but they're not the same and it's factually inaccurate to say that it is.

I believe that illegally downloading movies/games/comics/anything is actual stealing. You can quibble about that if you like (and I know you do like to quibble) but I am not going to agree with you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2015, 03:04:25 PM
Quote from: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 03:03:01 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 07 January, 2015, 01:25:00 PM

It's not theft. In the same way theft isn't murder, and burglary isn't mugging. You may think copyright violation and theft are equivalent but they're not the same and it's factually inaccurate to say that it is.

I believe that illegally downloading movies/games/comics/anything is actual stealing. You can quibble about that if you like (and I know you do like to quibble) but I am not going to agree with you.

You chaps seem to be heading for an arguement, even though you both agree..!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 07 January, 2015, 03:25:52 PM
I'm not the one insisting on using a word that means one thing to describe another. I can believe that abortion is murder (I don't) but the words have different meanings until such time as the law changes I would be objectively wrong to say that they are same.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 07 January, 2015, 04:03:36 PM
Two counts of extreme pedantry - that's 5 in the cubes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 04:09:31 PM
I agree with Jim.
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If Person A purchases a DVD and then lends it or sells it on at a car boot sale to Person B, that would not be seen as theft. If Person A decides to rip the DVD and make the movie (eg) available online then also no theft has occurred when Person B downloads it. Person B has downloaded data only, nothing physical, and this is the equivalent of lending.
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Now, if Person B downloads that movie, burns it to disks and sells them as originals then that's fraud.
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In fact, the most guilty parties in "illegal" downloading are the ISPs and 'phone companies who charge for the bandwidth required to download these files - they are the only ones really making any money out of it, the overwhelming majority of torrenters do it for free and it actually costs them (time, money, risk) to be involved.
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File sharing is not automatically theft.
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Copyright is an archaic system that needs to be revised as a matter of some urgency. I like the idea that if you invent or create something then you control it for 10 years. After that, you get another 10 years where anybody who is capable can produce/reproduce your creation but you are entitled to a percentage of the profits. Beyond that, 20 years and 1 second after you've filed your patent/copyright, it expires and your idea belongs to the world in the same way as the wheel or spoons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 07 January, 2015, 05:34:14 PM
Quote from: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 03:03:01 PMI believe that illegally downloading movies/games/comics/anything is actual stealing.

You are free to believe whatever you wish, but that does not make it so in law.

A simple test of whether downloading is theft is to look at America's private prison system: if they could get away with charging millions of people - many of them non-white and thus preferred customers for the average supermax - with theft, they'd pack their jails and rake in the cash from doing so, but they don't because they can't because downloading is not theft.  That's why people get done for various other crimes - fraud, tax evasion, etc - rather than being charged with the specific crime of theft in copyright cases, and this is why it takes literally years to shut down somewhere like the Pirate Bay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 07 January, 2015, 05:45:55 PM
Quote from: Bear (PhD) on 07 January, 2015, 05:34:14 PM
Quote from: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 03:03:01 PMI believe that illegally downloading movies/games/comics/anything is actual stealing.

You are free to believe whatever you wish, but that does not make it so in law.

A simple test of whether downloading is theft is to look at America's private prison system: if they could get away with charging millions of people - many of them non-white and thus preferred customers for the average supermax - with theft, they'd pack their jails and rake in the cash from doing so, but they don't because they can't because downloading is not theft.  That's why people get done for various other crimes - fraud, tax evasion, etc - rather than being charged with the specific crime of theft in copyright cases, and this is why it takes literally years to shut down somewhere like the Pirate Bay.


What that really says is it's more cost prohibitive to chase people than it being specifically illegal or not so why bother chasing after the little people.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 07 January, 2015, 05:52:07 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 04:09:31 PM
Beyond that, 20 years and 1 second after you've filed your patent/copyright, it expires and your idea belongs to the world in the same way as the wheel or spoons.

You can sod the sod right soddin' off with that soddin' idea, ye soddin' sod!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 05:53:29 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 07 January, 2015, 03:04:25 PM
You chaps seem to be heading for an arguement, even though you both agree..!

Since we fell out in the Political Thread, Jim has tended to disagree with me whether he actually agrees or not. See also the discussion regarding Fiends of the Eastern Front.

Here he's confusing a moral standpoint with legal terminology, but I suspect he knows that full well.

I also presume that, despite not using the T word to describe illegal downloading, he wouldn't encourage everyone to illegally download Dept of Monsterology 101, or indeed any other creative works, even those he was not directly involved in originating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 07 January, 2015, 06:10:14 PM
You could always try asking him directly instead of talking around him.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 06:24:47 PM
I take it you're not a fan of the limited copyright/patent idea, M.I.K. May I ask why?
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I like the idea because I think it would free up creative resources and allow for faster development, especially in poorer countries. This idea could be especially useful for the manufacture of inexpensive drugs, for example, by and in the countries that most need them but have the meanest economies.
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Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 07 January, 2015, 06:42:30 PM
Theoretical situation...

Creative bloke comes up with brilliant concept and characters, of which he retains copyright. Submits detailed synopsis to film company. Film company thanks him but doesn't use ideas straight away, (they seldom do).

20 years later film company releases film with plot and characters suspiciously similar to creative bloke's idea.

Bloke says "Hold on, that's my idea!"

Film company says "Yes it is. So what? We've also got loads of other old ideas from hundreds of other folk we've been holding onto for 20 years as well. What are you going to do about it?"

Bloke can't do anything about it.

Film company makes billions of dollarpounds from film, plus various bits of spin-off merchandise.

Bloke doesn't see a penny.

Bloke dies penniless after contracting food poisoning from a mouldy turnip he fished out of a skip or something.

That's why.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 06:59:00 PM
A simple time-limited option contract would take care of that, with built-in fees and penalties. Also, said company wouldn't last long with business practices like that - word soon gets around and their ability to attract new scripts would evaporate. The more honest companies would survive and thrive. Capitalism in action.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 07 January, 2015, 07:13:08 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 06:59:00 PM
Also, said company wouldn't last long with business practices like that - word soon gets around and their ability to attract new scripts would evaporate.

If it took them 20 years to use the first bloke's idea and had twenty years worth of submissions stockpiled, they wouldn't need any new scripts for a number of decades.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 07:27:51 PM
In theory, yes - but the creative industries are voracious. It's like they have some form of bulimia, gorging on talent then vomiting out product. No company in that market could sit on its hands for 20 years, hoarding material it hopes might make it in the long run. Companies need talent Now. Now! NOW! As a sensible business model, deliberately trying to cheat the creator wouldn't work.
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They don't need good product 20 years from now, they need it today. Next Thursday at the latest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 07 January, 2015, 07:32:33 PM
Hollwood Exec: "Hey we've got this great script! It's a banker I tells ya! We gotta buy the rights!"

*Hands investor a cigar and lights it for him*

Hollywood Exec: "......but we're not going to make it for twenny years, that way it will be slightly cheaper!"

Investor "So you're telling me I won't see a return on my investment for twenty years? Get out of my office!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 January, 2015, 07:49:11 PM
Exactly. Capitalism isn't at its heart a bad thing at all. Capitalism knows how to get things done.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 07 January, 2015, 10:39:05 PM
It may not be bad, but it is amoral.

And while it may be slightly daft to suggest companies would sit on material for 20 years with the sole intention of waiting for the copyright to run out, I don't think it's quite as silly to believe they'd take advantage of an opportunity, should it present itself.

Besides, that's only one of the reasons I think it's a bad idea. I've got a whole load more, complete, (if necessary), with dubious theoretical situations I've thought up in a couple of minutes, (but they do all mainly involve folk trying to scrape by on a pittance, subsequently being done out of money by larger businesses / other individuals).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 08 January, 2015, 07:50:06 AM
Quote from: Jimmy Baker's Assistant on 07 January, 2015, 05:53:29 PM

Since we fell out in the Political Thread, Jim has tended to disagree with me whether he actually agrees or not. See also the discussion regarding Fiends of the Eastern Front.

Here he's confusing a moral standpoint with legal terminology, but I suspect he knows that full well.

Why the fuck are you speaking about me in the indirect third person?

I'm not 'confusing' two things, I have explicitly stated my position on the use of words which, I believe, are important since they are the only means we have to communicate on a forum like this. If we choose to use words as if they mean what we would like them to mean, rather than what they actually mean, then we have no shared common framework within which to debate or discuss ideas.

I also like the idea that I'm disagreeing with you in order to be a contrary twat. I'm disagreeing with you because you're fucking wrong about things. I wasn't disagreeing with you on the Fiends thread (which I had to go back and look up because I hadn't even registered it as a 'disagreement') I was correcting your incorrect assertion that Rebellion's use of WFH contracts on novels based on their IP was in any way unusual.* I agree with you on many things — your assessment of the problems with Judgement Day, for example, is spot on — and if it makes you feel better, then I will post "I agree with this." after every post you make with which I agree.

QuoteI also presume that, despite not using the T word to describe illegal downloading, he wouldn't encourage everyone to illegally download Dept of Monsterology 101, or indeed any other creative works, even those he was not directly involved in originating.

You think I'm avoiding using the word 'torrent'...? That's a bizarre assertion, and a strange tangent to the discussion that adds nothing.

Also: this is both a ridiculous straw man, and a fantastically cheap shot to which I will only offer: fuck you.

Jim

*If you didn't mean to suggest that the contracts were unusual, then all you had to do was say that that wasn't what you meant and I would have apologised immediately for the misunderstanding. Despite having a reputation for being argumentative on this forum, I do this all the time but people are too busy getting butthurt to notice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 08 January, 2015, 08:15:13 AM
Just to pour a little reality on some of the ideas being bandied about:-

(a) patents already last for only 20 years;
(b) if a big entertainment business wanted to use someone's story idea then they can work around it quite easily; copyright does not protect ideas but rather the expression of the idea.

The reason patents last for 20 years is to give a return and incentive to their inventor to create the patented technology. It is an expensive business, research, and so inventors are given protection for what they make. To balance that monopoly against the interests of the public, the protection lasts only 20 years and then anyone can make the thing. A good example is ibuprofen; it was invented by Boots and they sold it as Neurofen for 20 years (or slightly less, as they had to get it to market) and then, bang, loads of generic competitors came out.

Copyright is different, in that there is no inherent commercial value. The idea expressed by copyright is never protected; you cannot "copyright an idea". That's why there are so many rip-offs of stories; think of Rambo clones in the 80s. What is protected is one creator's vision - specifically (and I quote UK legislation here) "original literary, dramatic, musical or artistic works, sound recordings, films and (c)the typographical arrangement of published editions". Original does not mean there is artistic merit but rather that someone sat down and made it ("the sweat of the brow" test). Therefore, if I sat down and wrote a similar story to one in existence then it is my copyright.

Of course, there is a borderline. You cannot simply change the names of characters. The closer a new work is to a pre-existing one (the "look and feel test"), the easier it is to allege breach of copyright. But - bearing in mind there is no protection for ideas - a re-write of an existing story using similar themes, character-types and situations is quite straight forward.

One example: The Island. If you don't recall it, this film (starring Ewan MacGregor and, from memory, Scarlett Johanssen) was about an idyllic community where it turns out everyone is a clone of someone famous and they are being kept for spare parts.

To quote wikipedia's entry on the film: "Copyright infringement controversy. The creators of the 1979 film Parts: The Clonus Horror, which was also about a colony that breeds clones to harvest organs for the elite, filed a copyright infringement suit.  Michael Marshall Smith's 1996 novel Spares, in which the hero liberates intelligent clones from a "spare farm", was optioned by DreamWorks in the late 1990s but never made. It remains unclear if the story inspired The Island, and so Marshall Smith did not consider it worthwhile to pursue legal action over the similarities. Teressa Dick, former wife of the late science fiction writer Philip K. Dick, referred to the film as "another PKD rip-off"

So, why wait 20 years? What The Man wants, The Man gets.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 08:18:01 AM
People get done out of money by unscrupulous companies all the time. There's hardly an idea on Earth that can't be turned to nefarious purposes by nefarious characters but that's what contracts and laws and personal recognicance are there for.
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Here's a dubious theoretical situation of my own to explore the limited copyright/patent idea. I will base the explanation on a comic character but the subject could just as easily be a new drug or technology.
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Jon Ezquerra and Carl Wagner invent a character/world/story called 'Judge Alpha'. For the first 10 years, only Jon and Carl control Judge Alpha - both the product itself and where that product appears. They can license the product and its derivatives as much as they want and charge whatever they like for their licensing. Judge Alpha is all theirs.
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Once the first decade is over, Jon and Carl lose ultimate control over Judge Alpha but will still be entitled to a share of all income generated by that product. They can still control their own Judge Alpha output either directly or through agents like the editor of the medium in which Judge Alpha appears. However, now Jon and Carl's control has gone, anybody can now produce and sell new and original Judge Alpha stories/merchandise provided they pay a percentage of the generated revenue to Jon and Carl. Of course, Jon and Carl could turn this free-for-all to their advantage by issuing/selling their "Creator Approved" seal to products they like and withholding it from those they don't.
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Once that second decade is up, Jon and Carl's entitlement to automatic reimbursement for Judge Alpha products comes to an end. They'll still get paid for their continued original output and will still be able to charge for their Creator Approved stamp. By this time, the product called Judge Alpha belongs to everyone and so anyone can use it. The earliest stories can be reprinted without charge, which might be a great help to fledgeling magazines whilst re-introducing Judge Alpha to a whole new audience.
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The limited copyright/patent idea is, I think, a good one as it protects creators and encourages development.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 08 January, 2015, 08:59:50 AM
You mix patents and copyrights. They are different things.

Managing such a process for the sheer volume of copyright material would be impossible, unless you change what copyright protects - do that, and you lessen its scope.

Patents already have a 20 year life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 10:28:38 AM
Yes, I do mix them up.
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As I understand it, patents and copyrights can be extended somehow so that income and control continues even after the original creator/inventor has died. I do not like this rent-seeking culture.
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There are also instances of corporations buying up patents specifically to squash them. There is an urban legend from around here that I've heard occasionally ever since I was a kid which, true or not, illustrates my point. A Southport inventor created a new type of automotive headlight bulb that was brighter and three or four times longer lasting than current bulbs. The bulb was demonstrated on the incomplete and yet to be opened Formby Bypass to a small cabal of electronics and bulb manufacturers, who were all impressed.
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The cabal purchased the patent and then ripped it up in front of the inventor, who was confused as to why they'd do that. The patent was ripped up, of course, because even though the bulb was a marvel it would have meant replacing millions of pounds' worth of manufacturing and factory equipment in order to produce a bulb which, because of its inherent durability, would not be sold in such great numbers as ordinary bulbs. Private profit outweighed public benefit.
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Limiting the patenting/copyrighting system along the lines I've mentioned would not eradicate this practice but it would help to limit the damage to ten years, as after that anyone could access the patent and produce the bulb provided they do it properly, lawfully and tip up a percentage of the profits to the patent/copyright holder who may even use that extra income to start upgrading their own systems to produce those new bulbs.
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I am becoming increasingly uncomfortable with this concept of "intellectual property rights" and the idea that anything you think of belongs to you and only you. The majority of new ideas and inventions arise from the amalgamation or cross-fertilisation of pre-existing ideas and inventions, so what IP says is that it's all right for me to use the ideas and inventions of other people to create my own ideas and inventions but that nobody else has any right to use what I come up with.
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The copyright/patent system must, in my view, strike a balance between private profit and public benefit with the emphasis, or benefit of the doubt when needed, being given to the latter.
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Just to lighten things up, here's a list of supposedly lost or suppressed things which is fairly entertaining: listverse.com/2009/07/31/top-10-amazing-lost-or-suppressed-inventions/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 January, 2015, 10:51:35 AM
the current patent system forces an inventor/creator to pay to keep a patent renewed - didn't the inventor of the MP3 compression process make zero money form it because he couldn't afford to keep the patent up? Think I heard that on the radio recently.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 08 January, 2015, 12:16:29 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 10:28:38 AM

The copyright/patent system must, in my view, strike a balance between private profit and public benefit with the emphasis, or benefit of the doubt when needed, being given to the latter.
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This is a flawed ideal. It turns upon the misconception, outlined in your post, that simply because a lot of new IP builds on the old then, somehow, anyone could create new IP. That is not true. Also, for those involved in creation, there is no guarantee of a return. The system therefore protects the IPs that actually make money.

Normally, I wouldn't take issue with what anyone says here, but the whole undertone of your posts seem to be that the existing system is flawed when it simply is not. It strives to strike the balance you seek. Of course, you can disagree with the length of protection offered, and I get that, but I get the impression that you think there is no attempt at balancing in the current system. (Correct me if I'm wrong).

Patents are only granted if an expert panel agrees that there is a "unique creative step" and more patents have been lost to pre-existing technology ("prior art") than any stifling.

The idea of "ripping up" a patent is, well, patent nonsense. They are registered in detail; anyone can see and access them, even during the protection period.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 01:09:09 PM
Yes of course, "ripping up the patent" is just a dramatic embellishment in the urban legend and not to be taken as an actual destruction of information.
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Like most of our systems I do think that the patent/copyright process is important and largely helpful but it could be better - as everything could. A few tweaks to the way it works, such as this time limit idea, might make the system even more useful. I agree that there is a fine line between what is privileged and what is public but I also think that, as the pace of invention in the world seems to be accelerating, the systems we use to keep track of inventions/creations must evolve not only to cope with but also exploit this profusion for the good of as many as possible.
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Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 08 January, 2015, 01:23:39 PM
This is all getting in the way of good old fashioned moaning.

I'm using a system based in flash which requires every step of the process to be added manually by different menus which each need to load and resolve independently of the main process.

Who the drock designs these things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 08 January, 2015, 01:29:03 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 08 January, 2015, 01:23:39 PM
Who the drock designs these things.
Children who can't get proper jobs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 01:41:55 PM
The battery's gone flat so the boat engine won't start. This has somehow caused the broken heating system to fix itself (now that the sun's come out) and the water pump to stop working. I'm beginning to think this narrowboat may be haunted...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 08 January, 2015, 07:27:20 PM
So I agree that it's not theft to go to a torrent site and download a copy of something. It's just copyright infringement. Is that right?

But surely it's wrong to use copyright infringement as a means to get things we want but either can't afford or can't be botherd to pay for?

In the 'fuck you' example, if you infringe copyright just now on Dept. Of Monsterology none of Jim, Grennie or PJ would get money that should be due to them for the work they have done. I can't think of a good reason why anyone would like to do that. Even if the law seems out of date.

So surely that just extends to all creatives and not just the ones we vaguely know.

Or if people do think copyright infringement is OK, what do they think of the various loopholes that big businesses or celebrities use to avoid paying tax. Are they just doing stuff that's OK because the law hasn't caught up with them yet?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 08 January, 2015, 08:02:44 PM
As someone who works in the design sector I do understand why so many creators get touchy about copyright -- after all, it's their living and they've decanted bits of their soul into their creations.

However, copyright & IP laws are archaic and not fit for the digital age.  The law needs to change, and creators also need to get real about how things work (including the fact that work-for-hire is the norm in most industries -- you wouldn't pay an architect royalties for every year a building is occupied).

That's my ha'penn'orth, anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 08 January, 2015, 09:07:49 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 08 January, 2015, 07:27:20 PMI can't think of a good reason why anyone would like to do that. Even if the law seems out of date.

I don't think torrenting should be seen as a deliberate attempt to destroy capitalism, thwart the law, or defraud the creative industries any more than kids swapping comics or watching a movie in a shop window is.  Convenience is most likely the main motivator, not criminal impulse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 08 January, 2015, 09:27:50 PM
But those things aren't done on an industrial scale.

Despite my bestvefforts, one of my boys pirates everything. Just like all of his mates. He doesn't see why he should pay for anything that can be found on the internet. Regardless of whose copyright it is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 January, 2015, 01:41:02 PM
Just to return to the thread topic: I hate when I buy what I believe are nice shirts off the Internet,  then am forced to accept that the dummy in the photo is based on a muscular 20-year-old,  and the shirts aren't quite so cool on a middle-aged skinny man with a beer belly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 09 January, 2015, 01:44:39 PM
Maybe you should try wearing one of those aprons showing a ripped body underneath the shirt?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 09 January, 2015, 02:08:04 PM
Dinner last night. A nice bit of chili sauce wouldn't go wrong. Lid comes shooting off, sit-com style, and dumps have a pound of fiery goodness all over the plate!

Quote from: Tiplodocus on 08 January, 2015, 09:27:50 PM
Despite my bestvefforts, one of my boys pirates everything. Just like all of his mates. He doesn't see why he should pay for anything that can be found on the internet. Regardless of whose copyright it is.
Not any help, I'm sure, but this is the part I don't get.

You like the stuff; presumably you want more of the stuff at some point; people need money to make the stuff (or, at least, to compensate them for the time spent making the stuff when they could have been subsistence farming or bond trading or whatever); what's the obvious solution?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 09 January, 2015, 02:25:04 PM
I torrent stuff, and if I like it, I buy it.  Before torrenting, there were many things I didn't bother with because the investment was a roll of the dice (Sky tv was too expensive, VHS tapes ditto, why buy an album if you know you probably only want one song, etc), but I was considerably more liberal with my cash once I could sample anything I fancied up front - I know for a fact I wouldn't have given yet another cop show the time of day, no matter who was raving about the Shield or the Wire.
There's also the knock-on effect of torrenting to consider: without it changing how/why shows were made, there wouldn't have been a BSG series beyond the pilot episode, and stuff like Orange is the New Black, House of Cards, and the upcoming Daredevil series would never have happened.

Quote from: Tiplodocus on 08 January, 2015, 09:27:50 PMBut those things aren't done on an industrial scale.

Does it make something more or less dubious if a few people do it instead of a few million?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 09 January, 2015, 02:28:52 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 08 January, 2015, 08:02:44 PM
However, copyright & IP laws are archaic and not fit for the digital age. 

I'm sure that this is technically true.  But add a side order of "ethics" and the result, for me anyway, is "I can get that for free from a torrent site but somebody isn't going to get the money they deserve so I won't. I'll wait until it is freely broadcast or comes on a streaming service or I can afford it".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 09 January, 2015, 02:55:31 PM
What if the material is deliberately made available on torrenting sites, or the creators leak it to generate word of mouth, or the material is banned in your country?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 09 January, 2015, 05:14:22 PM
I think that if they're honest, most people will admit to pirating the odd thing in their time (and I hold my hand up to that), and I'd say that the majority of those that do also spend a healthy amount of money on media too (again I'd point to myself - I spend far more money on legally-obtained books/games/comics/films etc than anyone else I know).

It's just those obnoxious, entitled leechers - that think it's their god-given right to have everything for free, and justify never paying for anything by self-righteously going on about the 'copyright mafia', or blame the cinema chains, or how if Hollywood made better films they'd be willing to pay for them (they wouldn't), or how if films/books/games were 'fairly' priced - ie if everything was 99p - then they'd pay for them (which they still wouldn't) - that really grind my gears.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 January, 2015, 06:33:26 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 01:41:55 PM
The battery's gone flat so the boat engine won't start. This has somehow caused the broken heating system to fix itself (now that the sun's come out) and the water pump to stop working. I'm beginning to think this narrowboat may be haunted...

I want to buy and live on a narrowboat this year.  Expect relentless questioning re houseboat maintenence in a few months ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 January, 2015, 08:02:57 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 09 January, 2015, 06:33:26 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 08 January, 2015, 01:41:55 PM
The battery's gone flat so the boat engine won't start. This has somehow caused the broken heating system to fix itself (now that the sun's come out) and the water pump to stop working. I'm beginning to think this narrowboat may be haunted...

I want to buy and live on a narrowboat this year.  Expect relentless questioning re houseboat maintenence in a few months ;)

Always been a dream of mine, but as I've got a secure (cheapish) flat and mooring/purchase fees aren't cheap, not to mention a lifetime's accumulation of comics'n'shit, means it will always be a dream, but I wish you all the best in your aquatic reinvention.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 11 January, 2015, 08:10:37 PM
First Saturday night off in about 2 months and today my arse is hauted by the ghost of Arthur Guinness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 11 January, 2015, 08:15:29 PM
Wee bit of Montezumas revenge going on there KP. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 11 January, 2015, 08:19:44 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 09 January, 2015, 08:02:57 PM

Always been a dream of mine, but as I've got a secure (cheapish) flat and mooring/purchase fees aren't cheap, not to mention a lifetime's accumulation of comics'n'shit, means it will always be a dream, but I wish you all the best in your aquatic reinvention.

Thanks very much, DDD.  Since I went travelling a few years ago I've learned to enjoy not having many possessions (also, much of my physical storage space has now been transferred to Computerland).  I don't think the mooring fees are half as steep here as they are in the UK - but then again there are more or less feck all  facilities for houseboat owners.  So we'll see what happens.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 11 January, 2015, 08:22:56 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 11 January, 2015, 08:15:29 PM
Wee bit of Montezumas revenge going on there KP. Z

Not quite. Let's just say my Carbon Footprint has increased dramatically.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 11 January, 2015, 08:35:07 PM
Something of a methane spike....if it were Mars, you'd be front page news. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 January, 2015, 10:49:03 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 11 January, 2015, 08:19:44 PMI don't think the mooring fees are half as steep here as they are in the UK - but then again there are more or less feck all  facilities for houseboat owners.

Get yourself up to Athlone for a look - thriving houseboat scene on the Shannon/Lough Ree last time I was there (two years ago), and reasonable enough by all accounts. Fancy it myself but for the sprogs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 11 January, 2015, 11:30:08 PM
Thanks TB; actually my brother lives there.  I'm in Leixlip though; where there's another little narrowboat community, and I'll probably start here when it finally happens.  I suppose the beauty of it is though, I can do both!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 13 January, 2015, 07:55:58 PM
Moaned about this before, but 'kin hell! Trying to put some music onto my new phone. Set the phone to 'manually manage music and videos' so theoretically I can drag and drop. Drag music from my work computer to my phone. Simple.

Go home, try and drag the music from my home computer's iTunes library (signed into same iTunes ID) to my phone. It won't let me. Go into settings, click 'manually manage music and videos', but when I click 'apply' it says doing so will delete all of the music and videos on my phone.

It would be so, so simple for them to make drag and drop easy and intuitive, but they keep trying to force syncing and playlists on us. Why? What is the logic behind this? Is it beyond their comprehension that someone might own/use more than one computer? Consider myself a huge fan of Apple, but this particular quirk drives me up the bloody wall.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 13 January, 2015, 08:02:00 PM
I use Copy Trans. They have a free version that works brilliantly and it a lot easier to use than itunes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 13 January, 2015, 08:10:52 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 13 January, 2015, 08:02:00 PM
I use Copy Trans. They have a free version that works brilliantly and it a lot easier to use than itunes.
Might give this a try.

My own current irritation with Apple is that they changed the way the music library is organised on your iPod a few months ago. It used to be a three level menu: Artist > Album > Tracks. For some unholy reason, they decided that it would be better if it went: Artist > Tracks (grouped by album, but running into each other.) I can just about accept that some people would rather have it the new way, but why on Earth can't I have the option to leave it as it was.

Would be perfectly happy to be called an idiot if it also means that I can set it back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 14 January, 2015, 07:54:56 AM
Quote from: radiator on 13 January, 2015, 07:55:58 PM
Is it beyond their comprehension that someone might own/use more than one computer? Consider myself a huge fan of Apple, but this particular quirk drives me up the bloody wall.

Apple have always worked on the principle that they believe that they know what you want better than you do.  The breathtaking arrogance of their design team is something to behold.

Their clever lifestyle brainwashing means that, like a boy band, they can do whatever they like and their fans will lap it up.

Unfortunately, Microsoft & Google now slavishly copy Apple's "customer is always wrong" philosophy -- but without the critical brainwashing -- and the poor consumer is left to pick up the pieces.  It's New Coke waiting to happen again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 January, 2015, 08:09:55 AM
Open source?
.
Always worth a look to see what there is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 January, 2015, 11:27:29 PM
Man who starts cooking chilli at half nine at night can look forward to having dinner for breakfast.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 16 January, 2015, 05:05:32 PM
I ended up using a third-party app, which did get the music off my phone (so I could copy everything back on), but in the process it split loads of albums up into separate albums, so tracks 1,8 and 9 are on one album, the rest on another album with exactly the same info and cover art. All the usual methods of merging the albums (editing the info data etc) refuse to work. It's an OCD nightmare!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 18 January, 2015, 01:17:47 PM
Check out VLC as an iTunes alternative. If Apple pulled it from their app store they must be doing something right.

http://www.videolan.org/index.html (http://www.videolan.org/index.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 18 January, 2015, 05:12:00 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 18 January, 2015, 01:17:47 PM
Check out VLC as an iTunes alternative. If Apple pulled it from their app store they must be doing something right.
http://www.videolan.org/index.html (http://www.videolan.org/index.html)

Yup.  Apple tried to put illegal restrictions on the free VLC player.  They had two choices: adjust their draconian money-grabbing regulations for the good of customers, or block the app.  Guess which they chose?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 21 January, 2015, 05:11:29 PM
Special Game of Thrones event at IMAX cinemas.....!


Nearest showing is in Seattle, 3+hr drive away.

Boo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 January, 2015, 09:14:34 AM
My PS3 died last night and won't stay on long enough to back my stuff up. Sony encrypt the hard drive so I can't stick it in a caddy and use my PC to rescue my saves and if I put the drive in another PS3 it will format it. Nice work Sony.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 12:46:24 PM
It's called Planned obsolescence and Sony are far from the only ones to play that game.
.
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planned_obsolescence
.
It should be banned, in my opinion.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 24 January, 2015, 02:25:05 PM
Rog69 have you tried the hair dryer solution.worked for me.it might not fix your ps3 but it might keep it on long enough to transfer your files.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 24 January, 2015, 06:40:22 PM
I think it has more to do with limiting the scope of hacking the PS3 than planned obsolescence.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 January, 2015, 06:42:49 PM
Thanks, I'm going to try the hair dryer trick over the weekend and see if I can rescue anything.

I already went out and bought a second hand PS3 to replace mine, I would have taken the opportunity to upgrade to a PS4 but Sony went a little too far with the Planned obsolescence by making it obsolete from the outset this time by producing a mediocre machine with no DLNA support or backwards compatibility  ;).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 January, 2015, 06:49:37 PM
I know this might sound crazy, but maybe it's just that sometimes things break...?

Apple get accused of this sort of thing all the time, and in my many years of getting heavy use out of a multitude of their products I've only had one fault - a hard drive failure that was relatively inexpensive to fix, and that they actually tried to warn me about in advance but I neglected to get it sorted.

Not everything's a conspiracy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 07:01:12 PM
The p.o. will be in individual components manufactured by suppliers. Couple this with hacking and piracy paranoia and you've got something that is virtually certain to fail. For the ones that don't fail, obsolescence is ensured be evolving software and tech. Probably.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 24 January, 2015, 07:08:17 PM
I can't really complain too much, the PS3 is probably the most un-Sony product that Sony ever made, it's media centre capabilities are pretty great with it supporting DNLA and many different video and audio formats instead of being tied to some bullshit proprietary Sony crap like so many of their products before it.

Mine actually lived for seven years before it died from the yellow light of death last night, so I have definitely had my moneys worth from it. Just a shame that they don't give you a way of salvaging your data from it after it breaks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 January, 2015, 07:17:30 PM
I'm a fan of Apple computers generally, although I can no longer afford new ones so I mainly assemble what I need to run legacy software out of parts that I get at recycling centers and on online small-ads. They have always caused me significantly less trouble than PCs during their respective lifespans.  However, there is something rather odd about those lifespans: around the time my last company was winding up, we had 8 of the angle-poise G4 iMacs which had served us as our primary work computers for nearly a decade with hardly a single issue. All but one had been bought at the same time.   Within 2 months all but one of them were dead, the universal culprit being the fiendishly complicated kidneys-like power supply unit.   Similarly, of our 6 2007 MacBooks, the logic board on all but one died within 6 months in 2011-2. 

Now 5 years for a laptop or 9-10 years for a desktop is a damn good innings for work machines handled by unloving and uncaring staff, but the synchronisation of identical failures does make you think something is going on. Alas for the conspiracy theory, a decade seems like a foolishly long deadline to deliberately build in.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 January, 2015, 07:30:11 PM
Likewise I've had a PS3 for 6 years that has been used a hell of a lot, being our primary media player as well as for games, and has been accidentally left powered on overnight on several occasions. Still going strong.

I had the RROD problem with the 360, but Microsoft were very reasonable about getting it sorted, and given what it ended up costing them, both financially and in PR terms, you'd have to be insane to suggest they knowingly shipped consoles that had a fail rate that high.

As for Apple, yes, they're very good at getting customers to upgrade, but that's the result of savvy marketing and superb product design, and older machines not keeping up with newer software? That's technological progress for you.

Was I bummed out that upgrading to iOS 7 significantly slowed down my old iPhone 4? Yeah, but no one forced me to download it, and it was eventually rectified anyway. Even so, I still got four full years of use out of that phone, using it every single day, and it survived getting rained on and dropped dozens of times, and that's a bargain as far as I'm concerned.

Not saying that 'planned obsolescence' doesn't or hasn't ever existed in some form or other, but it's naive to think businesses - especially tech firms in this day and age who are locked in cutthroat competition with each other - would deliberately hobble their products and risk driving customers away.

I remember someone earnestly telling me once that technology exists that is lightyears more advanced what the consumers actually get, but that corporations conspire to deliberately conceal the latest stuff from consumers and drip-feed them old stuff so that can maximise profits. He obviously didn't have a clue about how business works.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 January, 2015, 07:58:32 PM
Planned obsolescence would seem to be an ultimate necessity and therefore requirement of current business models. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 08:00:55 PM
Sounds like he knows how the military works, though.
.
Pioneer 10 lasted 31 years, achieved the first mission to Jupiter, became the first spacecraft to achieve escape velocity from the Solar System,  and travelled *12 billion kilometres* (80 AU) before the power to its antenna died.
.
Voyagers 1 and 2 were launched in 1977, Voyager 1 entered interstellar space (INTERSTELLAR SPACE ffs!) in 2012 and Voyager 2 is expected to achieve the same feat in around 2016 and they're still sending back data. Their power systems are expected to last until 2025 - that's 48 years. In space.
.
And they can't build a phone/computer/console/telly that lasts longer than 7-10 years? Bullshit. And the worst part is that we just shrug our shoulders and accept it, chucking valuable materials into landfills and perpetuating the death, slavery and misery involved in digging up more rare earth elements to replace the ones we so meekly throw away. Bollocks.
.
Yes, yes, I know - I'm going...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 January, 2015, 08:08:06 PM
Don't why you would ever feel the need to go; nothing you say is at varience with what any rational individual would be led to believe in the circumstances. The world is pretty much run along what appear to be unregulated free market lines (the only provisio being if they fail; guess what...we bail). The model is based utterly on profit maximization with no place for any moral compass whatsoever. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 January, 2015, 08:22:06 PM
QuoteYes, yes, I know - I'm going...

Not sure where though. A spacecraft lasts longer than a smartphone? Talk about Apple and oranges.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 24 January, 2015, 08:27:25 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 08:00:55 PM
And they can't build a phone/computer/console/telly that lasts longer than 7-10 years?

Well I'm sure they can, but it'll cost ya, and 20 years on you'll be fed up because all your mates have one with a self-cleaning penis-socket and a doo-dad that makes you toast.  I think the driver here is the income-level and shallowness of the consumer.

Voyager 2 is probably humanity's single most successful and efficient machine (cool documentary on that monstrous BBC the other night), but while I'm struggling to find a decent breakdown of the construction costs (as opposed to the mission costs), it's probably safe to say that it cost 10s of millions, even with the design costs split 2 ways, and even in the 70's. I'm not sure that's going to wash for my new telly: they're called consumer goods for a reason.

Mind you, Trident 2 allegedly costs $30 million a pop, and I know which project I've got more value out of.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 08:53:55 PM
The "I'm going" was just an in-joke it seems only I got, :-)
.
I'm not saying that new models and technologies should not be developed and sold but why not design them to be easily upgradable/recyclable if you choose? (Why not, for example, make the case out of something biodegradable like hemp?  freecannabis.net/hemp-uses/hemp-fibre/  )  Because lots of people like me are happy with basic things that work. I want something to last for as long I want to use it, not for as long as some accountant calculates it should last for optimum sustained profits.
.
And yes, space probes and i-phones are completely different beasts but both basically human technology and design.
.
In 2011, Britain's oldest working television set, built in 1936, was sold at auction for nearly £17,000. ( www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1378606/Britains-oldest-working-TV-sells-17-000-Bonhams.html ) It can be done. But they won't do it unless we force them.
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 24 January, 2015, 09:17:53 PM
More to the point, why would you want a phone/computer/console/telly that lasts more than 10 years? Not sure I'd still be interested in videogames if they were still running on 8-bit machines, likewise films and TV if TV displays were all still low resolution and black and white.

If things were built to be permanent, technological innovation would come to a screeching halt overnight and everything would stagnate, with (I would imagine) dire ramifications for everything else - the economy, medical science etc.

As I understand it, a piece of modern tech is inherently more fallible for the simple reason that it's infinitely more complex than its 1930s equivalent, not because of this fanciful notion that it was specifically designed to break after a predetermined period of time. Businesses want people to keep buying new products from them, of course they do - so then the pressure is on them to give people a reason to do so - hence innovation. When they can't come up with a convincing enough reason, consumers (who believe it or not aren't all mindless sheep) simply won't fall for it and stick with what they already have - see 3DTV/4K/curved screens and to a lesser extent Blu Ray.

Quotewhy not design them to be easily upgradable/recyclable if you choose?

Last time I looked there were hundreds of companies whose entire business models revolved around recycling and reconditioning old phones, and Google were developing a modular mobile phone designed specifically for this purpose.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 09:45:43 PM
I don't disagree but there are many things that really aren't going to get much better; toasters, ovens, torches, razors, tyres, wardrobes, kettles, shovels, spades, lawn mowers, hair dryers, clocks, spanners, cups, plates, spoons, playing cards, trousers, boots, padlocks, etc., etc., etc.
.
There will always be a certain amount of wastage as technology advances but we must cut that wastage to a minimum. Make stuff to last and somebody else can get use out of it when you decide to upgrade. Instead of throwing knackered stuff into the bin, wouldn't you rather give something obsolete but still working to people in poorer nations?
.
I know I would.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 24 January, 2015, 10:08:50 PM
What he said. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 25 January, 2015, 09:37:26 AM
What we really need is some kind of open gaming platform that you can buy or easily build yourself from whatever components you like and then just update the parts that need updating to enable you to keep up with the advances. You could customise it to your exact requirements because you would have the freedom to install whatever hardware or software you like. You wouldn't need to throw the whole box away when it becomes outdated and you could even re purpose old hardware for something else. Backwards compatibility would mean all your games would still work after you upgrade, they would probably even run and look better!

If only such a thing existed  ;).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 January, 2015, 10:24:31 AM
Yes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 January, 2015, 10:35:14 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 24 January, 2015, 09:45:43 PMMake stuff to last and somebody else can get use out of it when you decide to upgrade. Instead of throwing knackered stuff into the bin, wouldn't you rather give something obsolete but still working to people in poorer nations?

Obviously this is a better way to do things, but again I'd see the driver as the consumer, not the manufacturer. When people give a rat's arse beyond their current  convenient diversion/badge of affluence, things will change. Until then anyone making the same product at 3 times the price to last 10 times longer as opposed to 0.15 times thinner  is going out of business.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 25 January, 2015, 12:13:31 PM
The other side of that coin is that when people can't repair their existing stuff for cheaper than getting the new one, they're always going to buy more. Which is a result of a mass manufacturing base existing for the newer stuff.



On another note, the magical box as described by Rog69 just got its long-delayed upgrades today. SSD (and which = 3xHDD drives now being used as dump space) twice as much ram, it's a dream.... but it's still 3 years in the past as double the ram = 4gb. My (admittedly OTT) mate has 16 bloody gb. No more upgrades possible till motherboard is replaced, which will follow with a new CPU... minor impediments indeed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 25 January, 2015, 04:18:52 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2015, 09:37:26 AM
What we really need is some kind of open gaming platform that you can buy or easily build yourself from whatever components you like and then just update the parts that need updating to enable you to keep up with the advances. You could customise it to your exact requirements because you would have the freedom to install whatever hardware or software you like. You wouldn't need to throw the whole box away when it becomes outdated and you could even re purpose old hardware for something else. Backwards compatibility would mean all your games would still work after you upgrade, they would probably even run and look better!

If only such a thing existed  ;).

Ha, the final USB port on my motherboard failed before Christmas, so I needed a new motherboard.
Which meant new CPU & cooler & RAM & power supply. But on the plus side I could keep my SSD, Hard Drive, Graphics card, DVD drive, monitor, keyboard, mouse and other gubbins.
I didn't need to replace the case but got this rather nice case anyway which has made my respectable gaming PC basically silent: http://www.overclockers.co.uk/showproduct.php?prodid=CA-096-AE (http://www.overclockers.co.uk/showproduct.php?prodid=CA-096-AE)

A lot of the fun in having a PC is replacing various bits over the years until several iterations later it is a completely different machine and you never have to clear it with the missus to get a new one!  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 25 January, 2015, 05:12:01 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 25 January, 2015, 12:13:31 PM
The other side of that coin is that when people can't repair their existing stuff for cheaper than getting the new one, they're always going to buy more. Which is a result of a mass manufacturing base existing for the newer stuff.

I'm often amazed at how little effort some people put into repairing things these days (and I am going to try to repair my busted PS3), a lot of people just dump stuff and buy new without giving it a second thought. I don't think that there is an appliance in my house that is under 10 years old and most of them have been repaired at least once, granted not everyone is technically minded but with the wealth of info and access to parts via the net, most repairs are trivially easy.

Quote from: Minkyboy on 25 January, 2015, 04:18:52 PM
A lot of the fun in having a PC is replacing various bits over the years until several iterations later it is a completely different machine and you never have to clear it with the missus to get a new one!  ;)

The trick is to always keep the case as long as you can, my wife thinks I've had the same PC since 2006 :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 27 January, 2015, 12:19:29 AM
OK, I take it back. Everything is a corporate conspiracy.

How is shit like this even legal? Absolutely disgraceful. As a Brit living America, being able to buy an imported Twirl or Yorkie from my local deli is like a little taste of home.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/24/nyregion/after-a-deal-british-chocolates-wont-cross-the-pond.html?smid=fb-share (http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/24/nyregion/after-a-deal-british-chocolates-wont-cross-the-pond.html?smid=fb-share)

Instead of unfairly squashing competition like this, why don't they instead focus on making chocolate that doesn't taste like sawdust and farts?

Pricks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 07:28:52 AM
Quote from: radiator on 27 January, 2015, 12:19:29 AM
Instead of unfairly squashing competition like this, why don't they instead focus on making chocolate that doesn't taste like sawdust and farts?

Although it must be noted that since Kraft bought out Cadbury, they've been moving more and more of the manufacturing to Poland and changing the recipe of the 'chocolate' to cocoa powder and palm oil, which is why the 'chocolate' is increasingly sickly and gritty. :-(

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 07:38:05 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2015, 05:12:01 PM
I'm often amazed at how little effort some people put into repairing things these days

I'm amazed how little some people value their time. Admittedly, since I became a freelancer, I feel the value of my time quite acutely, but I've always made a value judgement as to financial cost vs time.

If I'm going to have spend half a day working out how to fix something and then attempting to fix it with no particular guarantee of success, weighed against either paying someone else to fix the damn thing or buying a new one... Well, I'm open to persuasion on the repair front, but my instincts lean towards handing over the cash.

(Note: I understand that for people who are more time-rich and cash-poor this value judgement may work out quite differently. I anticipate that when I retire I'll probably be fixing things that aren't even broken...)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 27 January, 2015, 08:17:35 AM
It's not so much a money saving thing for me (and I'm not particularly time rich either), but I do get a lot of satisfaction from repairing things, give me a faulty washing machine to fix and I will get more enjoyment and a sense of achievement out of that than sitting in front of the TV or playing games for a couple of hours. I guess my brain is just wired that way.


Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 07:28:52 AM
Although it must be noted that since Kraft bought out Cadbury, they've been moving more and more of the manufacturing to Poland and changing the recipe of the 'chocolate' to cocoa powder and palm oil, which is why the 'chocolate' is increasingly sickly and gritty. :-(

Cheers

Jim

I just hope they don't switch to the Hershy's sour milk / vomit flavoured recipe  :sick:.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 27 January, 2015, 08:22:46 AM
I often do little repairs myself. Heating element in the oven, heating element in tumble dryer, thermocouple on gas boiler are all easy to replace with ten minutes on YouTube. They cost peanuts online. Compare that to a minimum £60 call out charge and then having to wait in all day for a repairman...

Plus, you know, you get that satisfaction.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 08:48:23 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 27 January, 2015, 08:22:46 AM
thermocouple on gas boiler are all easy to replace with ten minutes on YouTube.

I hope to God you're Safe Gas Registered (formerly CORGI).

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 27 January, 2015, 12:16:48 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 08:48:23 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 27 January, 2015, 08:22:46 AM
thermocouple on gas boiler are all easy to replace with ten minutes on YouTube.

I hope to God you're Safe Gas Registered (formerly CORGI).

Cheers

Jim

They won't let me register. Something to do with my last three houses blowing up in unexplained circumstances.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 12:52:11 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 27 January, 2015, 12:16:48 PM
They won't let me register. Something to do with my last three houses blowing up in unexplained circumstances.

Arf!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 02:20:49 PM
I have an abscess the size of a golf ball in my gum. I thought it was nothing and had almost got rid of it with a salty mouthwash (settle down at the back...) but it came up like an alien egg in the night. I rolled over onto the effected cheek (all right, you at the back, final warning...) and had to peel myself off the ceiling.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 27 January, 2015, 04:35:56 PM
Shark.i know your pain.a few years ago I went for root canal treatment and nerve was still alive and infection became an abscess.the worst pain I've ever experienced and I've broken most of the bones in my body.had to suffer for two weeks that I only survived because my girlfriends brother was home from America and gave me Vicodin to help me get some sleep.Hope you get it dealt with swiftly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 27 January, 2015, 04:38:51 PM
Ouch Sharky.

Managed to scald myself with hot tea today. My hand is a stunning shade of red.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 27 January, 2015, 04:43:36 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 27 January, 2015, 07:38:05 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 25 January, 2015, 05:12:01 PM
I'm often amazed at how little effort some people put into repairing things these days

I'm amazed how little some people value their time. Admittedly, since I became a freelancer, I feel the value of my time quite acutely, but I've always made a value judgement as to financial cost vs time.

If I'm going to have spend half a day working out how to fix something and then attempting to fix it with no particular guarantee of success, weighed against either paying someone else to fix the damn thing or buying a new one... Well, I'm open to persuasion on the repair front, but my instincts lean towards handing over the cash.

(Note: I understand that for people who are more time-rich and cash-poor this value judgement may work out quite differently. I anticipate that when I retire I'll probably be fixing things that aren't even broken...)

Cheers

Jim

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZZFiGBX2CA (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZZFiGBX2CA)

Agree with all of the above. In an ideal world we'd all work a 30 hour week and have the luxury of time to have a more hands-on approach to these things, but that's not how the modern world works.

Same goes for DIY. I love the idea of doing little projects, but the reality - sinking loads of money and entire weekends into discovering something is much harder and more complicated than I initially thought until eventually calling it a bodge job - is something I've pretty much given up on. Life's too short and free time is too scarce.

Regarding PC gaming, a lot of people barely have any time to actually play games, let alone spends hour upon hour fannying about with graphics cards and circuit boards. Some people just want the convenience of something that works out of the box - it's hardly as if we should expect everyone who wants to drive be able to build and service their own car.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 04:49:37 PM
Thanks, Zenith. I called the dentist, explained my situation and asked for an appointment.
.
"Sounds like an emergency," said the receptionist.
.
"I'll say," I said.
.
"Then 'phone back tomorrow at 9am, we can only make emergency appointments at that time."
.
"I can't make an appointment now?" I was incredulous.
.
"Oh yes," she said, "but not an emergency appointment. Emergencies have to wait until all the regular appointments have been booked."
.
"I see. Do you have any openings tomorrow?"
.
"Only emergency appointments, I'm afraid."
.
"Can I book one of those, then, please?"
.
"Certainly - at 9am tomorrow. Oh, and keep at it because 9am is a busy time and if you can't get through you'll have to try again at 9am on Thursday."
.
"Thanks."
.
Who writes their rules, Kafka?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 04:52:31 PM
Thanks, Zenith. I called the dentist, explained my situation and asked for an appointment.
.
"Sounds like an emergency," said the receptionist.
.
"I'll say," I said.
.
"Then 'phone back tomorrow at 9am, we can only make emergency appointments at that time."
.
"I can't make an appointment now?" I was incredulous.
.
"Oh yes," she said, "but not an emergency appointment. Emergencies have to wait until all the regular appointments have been booked."
.
"I see. Do you have any openings tomorrow?"
.
"Only emergency appointments, I'm afraid."
.
"Can I book one of those, then, please?"
.
"Certainly - at 9am tomorrow. Oh, and keep at it because 9am is a busy time and if you can't get through you'll have to try again at 9am on Thursday."
.
"Thanks."
.
Who writes their rules, Kafka?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 05:04:13 PM
Dammit, sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 05:04:30 PM
Dammit, sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 January, 2015, 05:17:40 PM
This does seem to be a recurring theme in emergency dentistry - I had almost the exact same conversation when my son had a ghastly abscess a few years back, transcript of which I believe is archived on here somewhere... 

Heart goes out to you, TLS, in fact my jaw has actually started aching even thinking about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 05:30:26 PM
Thanks, Tordels. The weird thing is that my teeth are all fine - this abscess runs front to back down the very bottom of my left gum, cheek and jaw. Not looking forward to the drainage but can't wait to get it done. Bit of a fever coming on as well.
.
If you haven't heard from me by this time tomorrow, tell Marg I love her and not to take any notice of that grumpy green brother of hers...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 27 January, 2015, 06:08:53 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2015, 05:04:13 PM
Dammit, sorry.

And so is the story of my Doctors. Phone at 8am or wait for 2 weeks to get an appointment.
At least the NHS still works....Just
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 January, 2015, 12:56:07 PM
"Oh dear," said the dentist, peering at my glistening pink abscess, "that's a good one."
.
Not the words I wanted to hear. He had a poke around, hmm-hmming. "Your teeth are fine," he said.
.
"Hn hnww," I said.
.
"I can't x-ray it," he said. "Well, I could but you wouldn't thank me for it."
.
The species of abscess I have, he explained, is not the kind that can be drained. So it's two types of antibiotic, one designed for horses and the other for cleaning septic tanks. If they don't work it's going to be a hospital job.
.
In the meantime all I can do is sit here, sweaty and nauseous and about three feet behind myself, take the pills and ache.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 28 January, 2015, 01:20:03 PM
Jesus shark, hope the antibiotics help.

If it's any consolidation I have my own dental issue. One of my wisdom teeth is starting to come through. And it hurts like a bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 January, 2015, 01:24:20 PM
Nasty stuff Shark, I had a similar case about a decade ago- bloody thing nearly closed off my throat.
The antibiotics will undoubtedly work, but prepare yourself for some nausea inducing swallows once they kick in and break down the infection. All the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 January, 2015, 01:24:55 PM
Ugh, ugh, ugh.  You know the rest.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: NapalmKev on 28 January, 2015, 01:25:25 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 28 January, 2015, 01:20:03 PM
Jesus shark, hope the antibiotics help.

If it's any consolidation I have my own dental issue. One of my wisdom teeth is starting to come through. And it hurts like a bugger.

One of my Wisdom teeth grew sideways out of my Gum and impacted against my cheek. It was absolute Fucking agony until I had it ripped out.

All the best.

Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 28 January, 2015, 02:14:28 PM
Hope those antibiotics sort you out, dental abscesses are no fun at all - remember to take them at the correct intervals and finish the FULL course even if you seem to be better!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 28 January, 2015, 02:30:00 PM
That's bloody infuriating shark.Had the same problem I no your misery hope antibiotics help you recover quickly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 January, 2015, 03:10:37 PM
Thanks, everyone. Feeling pretty miserable and sore right now but it helps to know you're all rooting for me (no pun intended).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 28 January, 2015, 04:25:19 PM
it's enamel reaction to be miserable (i'll get me coat!)  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 January, 2015, 04:35:19 PM
Been to get blood taken from a nurse today, following a recent chest infection (during which, my employers laid me off). Why won't they tell me my blood type??? >:( :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eamonn Clarke on 28 January, 2015, 08:10:49 PM
Because, strangely enough, blood group isn't done routinely in general practice (I assume this was done at your GP surgery).

The NHS generally only does your blood group test if you have been in an accident, or if you're about to have an operation, both cases where you might blood cross matching for a transfusion.

In many parts of the country GPs aren't allowed to request blood grouping. If you really want to know your blood group then the best way to find out is to go along and give blood at a donation centre.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 January, 2015, 08:43:35 PM
Bah, I'm afraid of needles!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 28 January, 2015, 08:47:50 PM
I'm a regular blood donor. It's a really easy process. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 January, 2015, 09:23:20 PM
Please elaborate on the blood-giving aspects!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 28 January, 2015, 09:35:08 PM
It's really straight forward. You register and give blood about once per month, I'm a universal donor so tend to get the odd phone call as well if there's an emergency. It is a very fulfilling thing to do. There are clinics everywhere and mobile services as well. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 28 January, 2015, 10:21:37 PM
I think it's longer than once a month but that may just be because they never seem to get one sorted in my area when I'm there.

Free biscuits + juice too. And a beer afterwards (strictly not recommended) goes further. Everyone's a winner!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 30 January, 2015, 09:48:32 AM
For the second time in two weeks, the local bakery has failed to stock any of my favourite Friday treat: Bailey's Chocolate slices. This is an outrage, I tell you! An Outrage! (Don't they know who I am?)!

Instead, I had to content myself with a mere chocolate muffin and doughnut.

Oh, the Humanity!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2015, 10:53:17 AM
"...chocolate muffin and doughnut..."
.
Sounds highly euphemistic...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 30 January, 2015, 11:41:00 AM
Flat tyre on my way in to work. Only replaced the tube 2 weeks ago - but then it also seems the tyre itself has finally worn to shreds.

Also the bastards have scheduled me in for meetings at half hour periods from 1200 to 1500, so much for going on my lunch break to get it sorted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 30 January, 2015, 01:10:55 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 28 January, 2015, 10:21:37 PM
I think it's longer than once a month but that may just be because they never seem to get one sorted in my area when I'm there.

Free biscuits + juice too. And a beer afterwards (strictly not recommended) goes further. Everyone's a winner!

Yep, it's once every 3 months in the UK.
Just did my 52nd donation.
And you're right. Booze goes farther and fags make you giddy and light headed. It's great! (Oh, and you're helping people out too.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2015, 01:24:39 PM
The last time I went to give blood they wouldn't let me because my blood contained a "vitamin deficiency."
.
At least, I think that's what the initials stood for.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 01:34:55 PM
They would normally only refuse blood if you are currently ill, flu etc. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 30 January, 2015, 01:37:29 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 01:34:55 PM
They would normally only refuse blood if you are currently ill, flu etc. Z

I had glandular fever and couldn't give blood for about ten years.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 01:39:45 PM
They of course do initial tests when you initially donate, and ask you a series of questions re travel history and sexual history i.e. interactions with prostitutes etc. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 30 January, 2015, 01:41:04 PM
I can never give blood in Switzerland because I lived in the UK during the foot and mouth outbreak of the 1990s!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 01:43:37 PM
Seems overly zelous that decision. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 January, 2015, 01:44:00 PM
Or in this jurisdiction, if you like mickey but also have one of your own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 30 January, 2015, 01:52:07 PM
Or if you're homosexual in Northern Ireland...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 02:00:00 PM
To be fair to the Courts up here, they told Poots to take his medieval attitude and fuck off. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 30 January, 2015, 02:05:54 PM
Was that the offical ruling..? ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2015, 02:25:46 PM
About six and a quarter inches.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 30 January, 2015, 02:34:17 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 30 January, 2015, 01:52:07 PM
Or if you're homosexual in Northern Ireland...
It's not that long since that was the case on the mainland too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 02:37:24 PM
Mainland? Mr Justice Treacy labeled his (Poots) stance on a ban as 'infected' following on from an earlier ruling indicating a ban is irrational. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2015, 03:06:24 PM
I have a friend who is a Jehovah's Witness. He would rather die than accept a blood transfusion due to a passage in the Bible that says something like "thou shalt not partake of blood."
.
"Blood is life!" he once said to me, berating me for giving blood.
.
"Ah yes," I said, "but doesn't the Bible also teach that there is no greater love than a man should lay down his life for his brother? And in giving blood, am I not laying down at least a portion of my life for my brothers and sisters?"
.
He harrumphed and said that he'd still rather place his faith in artificial blood.
.
"Rather than blood created by God and freely given?" I asked.
.
We don't talk about that particular subject any more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 30 January, 2015, 03:12:42 PM
Yeah Shark, I'll bet they're queuing up at your door. Z :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2015, 03:50:23 PM
Nah, we get on fine. As religions go, the Witnesses are pretty inoffensive. They don't blow themselves up in crowded market squares or level whole villages with bombs in the name of Jehovah. If they don't want to accept blood transfusions that's up to them. The only problem I have is when they drag their kids into it, which is a pretty big problem admittedly but not as big as many of the problems that come bundled with other belief systems.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 30 January, 2015, 05:17:53 PM
I couldn't donate for ages because I had stayed in a malaria area for "six months or more" and they didn't have a decent malaria test. One day I finally added it up and it was actually  5 months and 3 weeks. So now I can donate.

Well done Matt on 52 pints. That's very nearly an armful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 January, 2015, 05:29:43 PM
I've been meaning to read Locke & Key for a while so I picked up vols 1, 3 and 4 from the library recently and have read the first one. Really like it so decided to search for Vol 2 before reading 3 & 4  as it seems like a very story-driven book. Out of all the libraries in Manchester there are multiple copies of all the other volumes but not a single copy of vol 2. Grrr.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: HdE on 31 January, 2015, 05:11:23 AM
Insomni-surfing teh web tonight, and I feel like commenting on this:

Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2015, 03:50:23 PM
Nah, we get on fine. As religions go, the Witnesses are pretty inoffensive. They don't blow themselves up in crowded market squares or level whole villages with bombs in the name of Jehovah. If they don't want to accept blood transfusions that's up to them. The only problem I have is when they drag their kids into it, which is a pretty big problem admittedly but not as big as many of the problems that come bundled with other belief systems.

Just going to pop into this thread and say:

I'm actually very pleased to see these folks getting some positive press. The town I live in has a pretty large contingent of them, and I even know a few folks who have shown an interest in their faith.

I think it's absolutely correct to say they're an inoffensive bunch. I'd actually say they strike me as a group who practice their beliefs conscientiously, and from experience I know they're very mindful of not upsetting folks.

I also like that when they catch someone in their number doing horrible stuff that certain other religious groups would tolerate, they don't allow it to continue. That's pretty admirable, when you consider some of the stuff that certain branches of orthodox religion have hushed up and covered over.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2015, 07:40:22 AM
Hmmm, I have a slightly more negative view of the JWs as an organisation, based on their treatment of a 'dissenting' family who were neighbours of ours, whose kid was my brother's best friend.   Their uncle went on a rant on national telly about their financial practices, and the next day the family was evicted from their JW-owned home. It was pretty depressing.

This however a single anecdote, which I'm sure can be duplicated in most religions at one at one time or another.

(Incidentally, my brother's friend is now a well-known evolution-denier)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2015, 08:46:49 AM
I can only say that my JW friend has been a rock for me during my recent travails and doesn't take my refusal to join as a mark that I'm in any way inferior or evil. My own cousin, on the other hand, is a Christian and turned her back on me - as did all but one local councillor. Many of these councillors can be seen attending church or chapel, all dressed up and with shiny scrubbed faces, almost every Sunday.
.
But I don't expect it's their respective religions making them act as they do. Religion is, to me at least, no more important than the football team one supports or the music one enjoys.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2015, 08:58:53 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2015, 08:46:49 AM
I can only say that my JW friend has been a rock for me during my recent travails and doesn't take my refusal to join as a mark that I'm in any way inferior or evil. My own cousin, on the other hand, is a Christian and turned her back on me - as did all but one local councillor. Many of these councillors can be seen attending church or chapel, all dressed up and with shiny scrubbed faces, almost every Sunday.

Says it all, really. I take comfort in the fact that if these particular Christian types somehow have lucked into the right fairytale their returned Jesus is going to kick their arses.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 31 January, 2015, 01:29:54 PM
And on a less serious, more "minor impediment", point:

My car's air con got snow in and it filled up the cabin with exhaust fumes. It's fine per the garage but will be stinky for a week or so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2015, 02:16:17 PM
Tie a rotten fish to the exhaust manifold with fuse wire - that'll soon get rid of the horrid exhaust fume stench...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 31 January, 2015, 09:06:27 PM
If you take the last few posts, and assume JW stands for Jedi Warrior, the connotations become quite hilarious.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 01 February, 2015, 10:58:27 AM
My 10 year old eldest has logged on to my Xbox account and spent £10 on coins for Plants v Zombies.

Not only has he had a bollocking, but the last laugh is the coins are locked to my account!

Still, the impediment is that I have to redo all the security settings and passwords.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2015, 11:08:51 AM
Abscess in mouth finally burst. Eeurgh.
.
Like a scene from the Exorcist but relief, relief, relief!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 01 February, 2015, 11:57:21 AM
Get to a dentist as soon as possible shark.You don't want it returning.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 February, 2015, 12:00:10 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 01 February, 2015, 10:58:27 AM
My 10 year old eldest has logged on to my Xbox account and spent £10 on coins for Plants v Zombies.

Not only has he had a bollocking, but the last laugh is the coins are locked to my account!

Still, the impediment is that I have to redo all the security settings and passwords.

My friend's seven year old spent nearly a grand on extras for some dragon-breeding game without realising he was spending real money (he claimed!) - it took several very irate calls from his mum before they agreed to refund most of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2015, 12:02:14 PM
Appointment already booked for Tuesday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 01 February, 2015, 12:12:36 PM
Glad to hear you've finally got relief.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 01 February, 2015, 05:08:06 PM
Dying Light turns out to be only for 64 bit systems.

I don't have a quad-core system and it seems a motherboard update will make my main storage drives, my new RAM and my existing CPU defunct. So next upgrade will be Motherboard+CPU+RAM... £200+ from a rough estimate probably.... and then it'll be trying to either use a (seemingly unrewarding) IDE->Sata adapter or getting another hard drive.

Bah. Guess I really am running to the end of my system, graphic card and SSD would be the only things that carry on through.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 04 February, 2015, 06:03:32 PM
my wallet's falling to pieces and I somehow lost the photocard section of my travel pass. This meant I had to trek into Eccles on my day off to get a replacement. No biggie, mission accomplished ... but somewhere on route, the stupid bastard thing has managed to lose my debit card, driving license and library card.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 February, 2015, 06:10:43 PM
Lose...? Yes, lose...
.
*Screeches away in a showroom-new BMW laden down with library-stamped graphic novels*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 05 February, 2015, 07:05:56 AM
Trying to sell my flat and buy a house. I'm navigating a system that seems to benefit no one but estate agents and the more I get involved in it the more it feels like playing poker over the telephone.
There must be a better way!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 05 February, 2015, 09:05:32 AM
Quote from: JamesC on 05 February, 2015, 07:05:56 AM
Trying to sell my flat and buy a house. I'm navigating a system that seems to benefit no one but estate agents and the more I get involved in it the more it feels like playing poker over the telephone.
There must be a better way!

http://www.moneyobserver.com/how-to-invest/10-steps-to-selling-your-home-without-estate-agent
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 05 February, 2015, 09:41:01 AM
Ack! That isn't what I wanted to hear! I'm in the prosess of moveing out myself and i'mlooking at terrace properties tomorrow. :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 05 February, 2015, 10:20:51 AM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 05 February, 2015, 09:05:32 AM
Quote from: JamesC on 05 February, 2015, 07:05:56 AM
Trying to sell my flat and buy a house. I'm navigating a system that seems to benefit no one but estate agents and the more I get involved in it the more it feels like playing poker over the telephone.
There must be a better way!

http://www.moneyobserver.com/how-to-invest/10-steps-to-selling-your-home-without-estate-agent

I did consider this after reading a similar article but I bottled it. I find the whole thing pretty scary to be honest!
I think the Scottish anti-gazumping rules are something we could definitely learn from this side of the border.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 05 February, 2015, 11:42:54 AM
£350 quid to have someone else do all the estate agent-y stuff sounds like a bargain to me.
I had to physically pry the keys to my flat from the estate agent's hands when I moved in, saying he needed to do more stuff, even though I had walked directly from my solicitor's office to the estate agent's after being told it was done and dusted (and that if I didn't walk out of the place with keys to call the cops).  I asked my solicitor why the estate agent wouldn't part with the keys and was told he was "probably had an angle to get more money out of someone."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 05 February, 2015, 12:23:22 PM
Parasites.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 February, 2015, 01:01:29 PM
I forgot that I'd swapped shifts with a colleague and came in two and a half hours early -  as I'm needed for the late cover, I'm stuck with a 8am-8pm shift today. Already feels long and it's not even lunchtime yet.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 05 February, 2015, 05:56:33 PM
Now that does suck the big one. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 February, 2015, 06:02:42 PM
Yup, but on the upside, I'll have a day next week that's two and a half hours shorter - I'm a glass half full kinda guy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 05 February, 2015, 06:15:23 PM
As long as it's whiskey it can be half empty for all I care.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 February, 2015, 07:34:40 PM
In my experience a glass of whiskey is a binary proposition: full or empty, with no real intermediate stage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 06 February, 2015, 08:07:10 PM
Well there's sippin' whiskey and gulpin' whiskey. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 06 February, 2015, 11:47:21 PM
I like Whiskey, but it does not like me ;) :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 07 February, 2015, 12:05:43 AM
Whiskey likes you it's just that whiskey loves kicking your ass more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:00:35 PM
next doors evil ginger cat tried to get a fledgling dove that had come out of its nest on our old sky dish I rescued it but as it didn't have its tail feathers yet my dad whos a bird expert advised me to leave it were the parents could get to it as it was more than likely still being fed ,he would have taken it in his aviary but he doubtd it would survive, so I put it on the conservatory roof and stood guard for a couple of hours with my semi auto nerf rifle and a broom fending off the evil moggy twice. when the ginger git gave up and went inside I saw its mum and dad come to see it and it was trying to hop about on the roof so I went to make a brew,well earned I thought ...then I heard a bang and the bird has gone, I looked everywhere but Derek (as I named him) was no where to be seen. I think the evil ginger git cat came back and murdered him.. :(
  this is why I hate cats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:04:59 PM
I'm not too sure of the providence of this Grugz, but anecdotally I was told if the chick/fledgling is interfered with the parents will essentally leave it to die. Z :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 February, 2015, 07:21:47 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:00:35 PM
this is why I hate cats.

Cats eat birds. Sharks eat seals. Owls eat mice. Animals eat other animals. Doesn't make them evil, doesn't make them deserving of your hatred.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:25:43 PM
Anthropomising is contra-intuitive but real none the less. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 February, 2015, 07:25:57 PM
Another red postal card today :'( :'( :'( :'( must be Case Files 24

Bring back Geoff our postie, as we never had a red card from him!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 10 February, 2015, 07:29:03 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:04:59 PM
I'm not too sure of the providence of this Grugz, but anecdotally I was told if the chick/fledgling is interfered with the parents will essentally leave it to die. Z :(

Urban legend. However they may abandond them if you make them feel the nest itself is no longer safe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:34:03 PM
Happy to stand corrected TBU. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:36:20 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 10 February, 2015, 07:21:47 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:00:35 PM
this is why I hate cats.

Cats eat birds. Sharks eat seals. Owls eat mice. Animals eat other animals. Doesn't make them evil, doesn't make them deserving of your hatred.

Cheers

Jim

shitting in my garden does.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:41:07 PM
Weeelll, I suppose you need to factor in our early Christian teachings: consider the birds in the air, they do not reap etc. I guess they don't respect our property prerogatives. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:42:11 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 10 February, 2015, 07:29:03 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:04:59 PM
I'm not too sure of the providence of this Grugz, but anecdotally I was told if the chick/fledgling is interfered with the parents will essentally leave it to die. Z :(

Urban legend. However they may abandond them if you make them feel the nest itself is no longer safe.


I wish! then the buggers wouldn't have knackered my sky dish by annually shagging and nesting on it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 February, 2015, 07:49:23 PM
I don't get the intense hatred some people have for cats - and some people really do hate them with a passion. I knew a guy once who... well, you don't want to know but he regarded cats in the same way Van Helsing regarded vampires - yet in all other things he seemed perfectly sane.
.
I'm not a cat person, I wouldn't keep one (I prefer dogs) but I have nothing against them and enjoy it when friends' cats sit on my lap for a stroke and a purr.
.
I suppose you might not think the cat quite so evil if it was killing rats instead of baby birds.
.
Now ducks - ducks are *truly* evil...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 February, 2015, 07:49:39 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:36:20 PM
shitting in my garden does.

*shrug* There are any number of commercially available cat repellents. I love cats, but at a previous house all the moggies from the area seemed to want to shit in our back yard — dozens of the little buggers. There was a gel-based citrusy one that was very effective.

(Also: I don't profess hatred for dogs because they shit in the street.)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 February, 2015, 07:52:01 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 February, 2015, 07:49:23 PM
Now ducks - ducks are *truly* evil...

What are they doing at night in the park?

Think of them waddling about in the dark! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFK2Xq2RyiU)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:54:33 PM
true about the rat rather than the baby bird and ducks may be evil but they're bloody tasty! i'll keep my eye out for shitty cat reppellers but I assume theyre pet safe as my idiot griffon would probably think it was food.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 10 February, 2015, 07:57:04 PM
As a diver is comcour that Ducks are pure evil. You surface in an open patch of water in a lake or quarry,  assuming everything is tranquile, then some blooyd mallard starts nibbling at your kit and AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH! MY NEW BCD YOU NASTY LITTLE FECKERS YOUR SUNDAY ROAST!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 08:00:11 PM
I'm totally with the kitty kat love. I got a big old black farm cat for my eleventh birthday and she and I were cool with one an other for over twenty years. She was called Tina and was a true rural farm cat in that she killed anything she came across verminwise... strange she got along grand with the two half cattle dog. A hell of a cat. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 08:01:32 PM
Halfbreed cattle dogs. For clarification. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 February, 2015, 08:38:46 PM
Dogs you can milk or cows that chase sticks? It's genetic engineering gone mad!
.
I was a bit tight with the ducks on the marina during the recent freeze. The marina was nothing but ice, so when I threw bread off the boat it was (evil) fun watching the greedy little bastards come charging in like grumpy feathered pigs; all slipping and sliding and trying to snatch up bits of crust as they skidded past, banging into one another and squabbling and unable to properly chase one another or run away. Ducks fighting looks silly at the best of times but ducks fighting on ice? Priceless!
.
I know, I know - I'm going straight to Hell.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 08:53:59 PM
Yup
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 10 February, 2015, 10:10:57 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 10 February, 2015, 07:41:07 PM
Weeelll, I suppose you need to factor in our early Christian teachings: consider the birds in the air, they do not reap etc.

He says the birds are scrounging!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 10 February, 2015, 10:20:35 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 10 February, 2015, 07:42:11 PM
I wish! then the buggers wouldn't have knackered my sky dish by annually shagging and nesting on it!

Well, what looks like a good spot to one bird looks like a good spot to another....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 February, 2015, 07:53:22 AM
Missed a delivery of an item that was purchased from fleabay.

I came home to find a Yodel card through the door, which is annoying in itself as the seller claimed he used Royal Mail. Based on past experience I wouldn't have bought the item if I knew it would come via Yodel (The tantric sex of delivery companies, you are stuck in all day and still nobody comes).

The problem I have though is that the driver just posted a blank card through the door, nothing at all has been filled in so I don't know if they are coming back, left the parcel elsewhere or if I have to go and fetch it.

I'm never going to see this parcel am I.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 11 February, 2015, 08:40:32 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 February, 2015, 07:53:22 AM
I'm never going to see this parcel am I.

Personal experience with Yodel tells me that you should look in the bin, over the neighbour's wall or wait for the person who lives 3 doors down to come and deliver it to you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 11 February, 2015, 10:41:06 AM
I had a similar experience with Yodel but was told I had to collect the parcel from the depot. The card didn't say where the depot was or what the opening hours were. A bit of Googling revealed the location of the nearest depot but I eventually had to call their head office to find out what times it was open.
Shit service.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Skullmo on 11 February, 2015, 12:21:00 PM
I needed to collect from the depot. I phoned the head office and they told me that the depot didnt have a phone so they would have to wait for them to respond to an email and then head office would get back to me.

I loled
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 February, 2015, 07:54:07 PM
Quote from: DaveGYNWA on 11 February, 2015, 08:40:32 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 February, 2015, 07:53:22 AM
I'm never going to see this parcel am I.

Personal experience with Yodel tells me that you should look in the bin, over the neighbour's wall or wait for the person who lives 3 doors down to come and deliver it to you.

It's funny you should say that because apparently a blank card means "We have wedged your package between your wheelie bin and the wall and you won't notice it until you go to put the bin out on Wednesday night when it will drop a meter or so to the floor".

Twats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 12 February, 2015, 06:13:39 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 February, 2015, 07:49:23 PM
I don't get the intense hatred some people have for cats - and some people really do hate them with a passion.

Every (and I mean *every*) cat I've ever met has tried to dig its quarter-inch-deep claws into my thighs.  It's a rather painful experience to say the least.

I'm not a nasty person and I don't condone cruelty to animals.  However, I would happily fork-stab any cat that comes within 3 feet of me --  if they're happy to dole out unsolicited incisions then they can sodding well learn what it feels like.  Unfortunately that type of thing is frowned-upon in polite society.


And don't even get me started on dogs with their I'm-going-straight-for-your-knackers-with-my-vice-like-teeth thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 12 February, 2015, 08:16:39 AM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 February, 2015, 07:54:07 PM
It's funny you should say that because apparently a blank card means "We have wedged your package between your wheelie bin and the wall and you won't notice it until you go to put the bin out on Wednesday night when it will drop a meter or so to the floor".

Twats.

Text book - we've got a couple of deliveries due over the next few days, and I expect they'll be via Yodel. I wonder if they'll ring the door bell this time or just play "Let's assume they're not in and thus avoid the human contact." and then act surprised when they get called back to the house by the person who has been watching them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 12 February, 2015, 12:36:23 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 12 February, 2015, 06:13:39 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 10 February, 2015, 07:49:23 PM
I don't get the intense hatred some people have for cats - and some people really do hate them with a passion.

Every (and I mean *every*) cat I've ever met has tried to dig its quarter-inch-deep claws into my thighs.  It's a rather painful experience to say the least.

I'm not a nasty person and I don't condone cruelty to animals.  However, I would happily fork-stab any cat that comes within 3 feet of me --  if they're happy to dole out unsolicited incisions then they can sodding well learn what it feels like.  Unfortunately that type of thing is frowned-upon in polite society.


And don't even get me started on dogs with their I'm-going-straight-for-your-knackers-with-my-vice-like-teeth thing.

My old cat lived to 21 and never scratched a single person to my knowledge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 13 February, 2015, 01:42:39 PM
Amusing bureaucratic obstacles #411

I recently got a new passport because the chip in my old one was broken. After investigation, they have decided this damage isn't their fault and I need to pay up. (NB Not actually the current impediment.) The letter I have asks me to send a cheque or postal order but, as it's not the 19th Century I can phone a number in Newport to pay by card...

"Hi. I'd like (too strong a word) to pay this invoice please."
- "Oh, we can't take payments here."
"Hmm. This number is on the letter to call to make a payment."
- "Yes. We used to deal with that here but it's all been transferred to Liverpool."
"Ah. Okay. Can you put me through to them then?"
- "No."
"Well, can you give me the number."
- "No."
"...."
- "We can't give out telephone numbers of other departments."
"Em... But... OK. Let's see if I've got this right. I received a letter with your number."
- "Yes"
"You no longer deal with this work."
- "Yes."
"And, if the letter had been sent after this changeover, it would've had the number for the new team?"
- "Yes."
"So I could contact them to pay this."
- "Yes."
"But you can't give me the number?"
- "No."
"...."
- "If you call the main customer service number and ask them to transfer you through."
"I'm sceptical about this but I don't really have any other option, do I?"

Do
   - Call call centre
   - Explain story
   - Wait for guy (non-gender specific usage) to not be able to find any details
   - Give further details and explain again
   - Guy finds details
   - Get put on hold
   - Get told they can't take the payment directly
   - Tell guy I know that and ask to be put through to someone who can
   - Get told no but they will contact them to call me back (actually told today it could be days!)
   - Sigh theatrically
Loop Until (1=0)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 13 February, 2015, 03:03:24 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 February, 2015, 07:54:07 PM
Twats.

Still no sign of one of the items we've been expecting, so called the vendor. Item was delivered yesterday seemingly. I'm going outside in a little while to have a look through the recycling bin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 February, 2015, 03:25:14 PM
Why not invent a kind of box with a one-way slot/flap in it through which large parcels can be inserted, kind of like those night-deposit safes you sometimes see outside banks and post offices? The flap closes and dispenses one numbered/dated Deposit Receipt for Captain Yodel. You could call them Parcel Guardians and sell the idea to somebody for something in order to retire and go and live on an island somewhere.
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 February, 2015, 05:48:49 PM
Quote from: JamesC on 12 February, 2015, 12:36:23 PM
My old cat lived to 21 and never scratched a single person to my knowledge.

Sneaky too, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 13 February, 2015, 08:50:43 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 13 February, 2015, 03:25:14 PM
Why not invent a kind of box with a one-way slot/flap in it through which large parcels can be inserted, kind of like those night-deposit safes you sometimes see outside banks and post offices? The flap closes and dispenses one numbered/dated Deposit Receipt for Captain Yodel. You could call them Parcel Guardians and sell the idea to somebody for something in order to retire and go and live on an island somewhere.
.

That's a grand idea Sharky, I would buy one but it would need to be the size of a builder's skip for yodel drivers to hit from the other side of my garden gate.

My impediment today is that I am a worthless human being. I had to travel to the middle of London today so I parked up and took the tube in. I sat in an end seat because I had a case with me and it meant that I could put it at the side of me and not block the aisle. These are also the seats that are closest to the doors and you are expected to give them up to those who are disabled, Pregnant or travellers with small children.

I sat there spaced out and messing with my phone and not paying attention to the fact that there was a pregnant lady standing right in front of me with her bulge on my eye level, she even had a badge on her bump with the London underground logo and "Baby on Board" on it. I only noticed when the woman sitting next to me offered her seat to her and she sat down next to me.

I am sub-human scum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 14 February, 2015, 11:53:06 AM
Quote from: Professor Cardigan on 13 February, 2015, 05:48:49 PM
Quote from: JamesC on 12 February, 2015, 12:36:23 PM
My old cat lived to 21 and never scratched a single person to my knowledge.

Sneaky too, eh?

Ha ha, where's that 'like' button?


Regarding the safe box for parcels, someone presented a device very similar to what Shark describes on Dragon's Den. They didn't secure investment though, I think it was rejected on the 'anyone could copy it' principle.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 14 February, 2015, 08:56:18 PM
Quote from: Professor Cardigan on 13 February, 2015, 05:48:49 PM
Quote from: JamesC on 12 February, 2015, 12:36:23 PM
My old cat lived to 21 and never scratched a single person to my knowledge.

Sneaky too, eh?

  sneaky added to evil, our old Siamese when I was growing up knew my auntie marion was shit scared of cats,if she was visiting the cat would sneak ninja like onto her knee ,the moment she realised the cat had been sat on her was hilarious!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 14 February, 2015, 08:57:54 PM
Bad old puddy tat. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 16 February, 2015, 12:48:09 PM
First week day off in months.

Neighbours have builders in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 16 February, 2015, 01:18:52 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 13 February, 2015, 03:25:14 PM
Why not invent a kind of box with a one-way slot/flap in it through which large parcels can be inserted, kind of like those night-deposit safes you sometimes see outside banks and post offices? The flap closes and dispenses one numbered/dated Deposit Receipt for Captain Yodel. You could call them Parcel Guardians and sell the idea to somebody for something in order to retire and go and live on an island somewhere.
.

Amazon (and I think E-bay) use something similar on some campuses in America.  A series of lockers with digital combination locks.  The delivery guy puts the customers order in and locks it with a general locking code and the locker generates a unique opening code which is texted/e-mailed to the customer who has seven days to collect their package.

We were going to get something similar in Argos for e-bay customers but they decided to use a different system (stuffs kept behind the counter) when they realised that some of our branches tend to be thief magnets.  It's working though, we get twenty plus e-bay collections every day in our branch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 February, 2015, 02:38:28 PM
Morrisons supermarkets also have a locker-style click and collect service
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 February, 2015, 02:39:19 PM
Dang, and here was me thinking I was being clever and original :-(  Well, maybe one day I will... maybe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 16 February, 2015, 02:45:49 PM
Yep Sharky invention just aint you...now back with you to the Political and conspiracy threads. Z :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 February, 2015, 03:59:31 PM
*slinks off, muttering*
.
;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 16 February, 2015, 06:14:46 PM
work are having a laff! not only am I being investigated for "gross misconduct" I am now being threatened with disciplinary action cos my boss didn't do my dbs check properly, and as I have been off long term assumed it had been sorted! as it was done in june! so I have to go to a meeting after my union one and go through all my stuff again which may be a huge waste of time as theyre trying to sack me anyway.
I dunno about the "you cant handle the truth " thread you wanna work for the "caring" nhs for plots conspiracies,underhand corruption and blatant lies.
part of me wants to get binned then i'll be free of the main cause of stress in my life. ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 February, 2015, 06:24:23 PM
Don't let the bastards grind you down, Gruggy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 23 February, 2015, 12:25:30 AM
Quote from: Tombo on 16 February, 2015, 01:18:52 PM

Amazon (and I think E-bay) use something similar on some campuses in America.  A series of lockers with digital combination locks.  The delivery guy puts the customers order in and locks it with a general locking code and the locker generates a unique opening code which is texted/e-mailed to the customer who has seven days to collect their package.


I encountered a bunch of such lockers (for Amazon deliveries, I believe) on the top floor of Intu (formerly known as The Glades. I still think of it as that most of the time.) in Bromley a couple of weeks ago.

I don't know how long they've been there as it's not a part of the shopping centre I go to regularly as the shops are all on the lower two floors. If it wasn't for a call of nature and the shutting down the toilets on the   lowest floor I'd still he oblivious to them.

I hasten to add, they have toilets on the top floor. I did not pee in one of the lockers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 23 February, 2015, 01:12:58 PM
Delivery guy from Yodel just walked into our house, claiming he thought we had a porch(!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 23 February, 2015, 01:30:46 PM
Given how fucked Yodel apparantly is, he's probably casing your place for when he's let go and has to fall back on his original occupation.  That started out as a snarky comment but I'm actually not sure now.

Many years ago I had a lucky escape from a fire, and I may have mentioned the downstairs flat's tremendous skunk-based stench seeping up through the floorboards and ruining everything in my linen cupboard, but now, because their fire alarm goes off all the time - and not just when one of them falls asleep while using the fryer - the downstairs occupants had the bright idea of taking the smoke alarm out the back and smashing it to bits.  Whatever it is they're smoking or doing down there, I've had to take the battery out of my own fire alarm because it keeps going off, so I might die in a fire yet, closing some sort of Final Destination-style loop of karmic fate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 February, 2015, 01:37:15 PM
Don't some modern alarms key off heat? Maybe a couple of those might work for you instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 February, 2015, 02:28:19 PM
You're operating without a T437, Springfield? My God, this can't be happening!

I know that grasses traditionally walk with matching limps in Norn Iron, if at all,  but seriously Brigonos 'ol bear, you need to sort that out toot sweet. If not for yourself, for Li'l Dickhead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 24 February, 2015, 10:52:38 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 23 February, 2015, 12:25:30 AM
I encountered a bunch of such lockers (for Amazon deliveries, I believe) on the top floor of Intu (formerly known as The Glades. I still think of it as that most of the time.) in Bromley a couple of weeks ago.

The big problem with the Amazon lockers is that a fair proportion of stuff from Amazon CAN'T actually be delivered to them.

It's utter stupidity, given that they are a computer-controlled mailbox.  It's not rocket science for any Amazon-related parcel to have a code number on the front that allows a postal worker to deposit the item into the appropriate box -- regardless of where it originates.  Heck, Amazon could even offer a third-party service to other companies (e.g. Argos) for a fee.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 February, 2015, 08:47:41 AM
Got a crack in my ribs playing footy last night. It hurts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 February, 2015, 10:37:54 AM
And another car burnt outside the same dodgy neighbours last night, drama starting at 5am just after I got in from work, and continuing noisily until 730. Grrrr, all work and no sleep makes Homer something something.  Still, at least this time only the one car went and the cops were taking it seriously, with forensics and towtrucks and lots of bright flashing lights (grinds teeth). Maybe they'll accept there's a serious feud going on before in moves to 'viable explosive devices' like in neighbouring estates.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 25 February, 2015, 10:44:35 AM
FFS, a nightmare Tordel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 February, 2015, 11:01:31 AM
Hell here's something akin to your own predicament Tordels.

Last year, in July, the "Garage" based next door to the dive center burnt down. We (myself, the manager, her other half, and about 4 other instructors and staff members) received an automated response through our phone (Matt set it up i've no idea how it works) at 2 AM in the morning. I shot over their as fats as I could and by which time the fire had already blazed merrily for 30 minutes. Being the first person on the scene besides the fire fighters I ran over and demanded why it hadn't been put out yet.

Their response? "Too confined an area, neither an exterior dowsing or sending men in will do anything!". It was only after I pointed out we had several thousand liters of compressed air, oxygen enriched air and Nitrox bottled up meters away from the flames that they started to get edgy. Seeing as how the main hall of the center was still clear me, Matt and one of the instructors attempted to enter the servicing rooms to remove as much of the gas as we could. Upon opening the door the to back half of the center a huge hall of smoke shot out at us and we legged it back outside. By which point the firemen had started to do their job and sent chaps in with hoses to put it out.

The next day, after making a start on getting rid of the soot within the center which caked everything in a grimy layer of shit, we where invited by the inspector and the land lord to check out the remains of next door. It was clear even to myself that it was arson, as their where three points of origin in which the flames had started. Added to that our CCTV had been rendered inoperable just hours before. Though the court later ruled that this was circumstantial evidence, we never saw a penny of compensation because the garage owners where not insured. Before they could be arrested for several other accounts of illegal activity I can not divulge for....reasons, they jumped the country. Never to be seen again.

We have since got the center up and running again and gleaming like new, I arrived at the center yesterday however to the sight of police cars parked outside. Fearing some nutter had held the shop at gun point I asked the officers what was occurring. Though they could not tell me why, I found out from Matt soon enough that the brother of said nutter whom was formerly the garage manager had taken up residence in the shell of the building....and was growing an insane amount of pot.

It's bee a funny year, all told.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 February, 2015, 07:58:22 PM
My minor impediment is far less dramatic and far more Narcissistic. I have four short stories in the Top 20 over at YouWriteOn.com (http://www.youwriteon.com/) and my latest effort has just entered the same chart at number 21. Woo.
.
But sometimes living alone sucks. Nobody to share this meagre achievement with, nobody to pat me on the head and pretend to be impressed. It all seems so pointless.
.
Hmmm... That gives me an idea for a story...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 25 February, 2015, 08:15:59 PM
Congratulation mate!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 25 February, 2015, 08:28:23 PM
Well done Shark. Tordel and Hawk life in an urban area in the early 21st century is not good. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 25 February, 2015, 09:13:27 PM
Accept our virtual adulation Sharky!  Much better than a real hug, as I've been wearing the same work gear since Sunday (I've decided that when you work outside at night no-one can see you stink).

And Hawk, just how much weed constitutes an 'insane' amount? Asking for a friend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 February, 2015, 09:16:24 PM
Heh, thanks chaps :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 February, 2015, 11:57:33 PM
Wouldn't like to hazzard a net weight, Tordels, but it covered 2 3rds of a 50M by 50M unit. UV Lights and all!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 26 February, 2015, 02:43:59 AM
Earlier today my boss introduced me to the Head of a local school -- one of our major clients.  This Head was touring our facilities and seeking reassurance that his pupils fared well when they moved on to our college.  In front of him, I asked one of our best students if she'd gone to his school.  She replied that she hadn't.  After that, the Head has a strange look on his face and seemed unusually keen to move on with his tour.

It was several hours later that I suddenly remembered that his school is an all-boys school.

Bugger.  A career-limiting move, I suspect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 27 February, 2015, 08:22:35 PM
Yep A Cow, trcky one that. Z :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 01 March, 2015, 12:37:16 PM
Just watched an Oxford professor being interviewed by Sky news, about the role of universities in fighting extremism.  A three minute rant which included such choice cuts as...

"The government funds people going to university.  We pay people to go to university"

"This isn't about whether universities teach that the Earth goes around the Sun, or the Sun goes around the Earth.  This is important. "

This man is clearly from the past.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 01 March, 2015, 12:56:45 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 26 February, 2015, 02:43:59 AMIt was several hours later that I suddenly remembered that his school is an all-boys school.

Bugger.  A career-limiting move, I suspect.

I don't really see why you should be the one embarrassed by the fact that you instinctively know it is the year 2015.  My old school is still one of the most backwards and conservative institutions I know of - its principal's most notable public appearance to date being when she kicked a dog until it bled in front of the student body a year or so back - but even it went mixed about 25 years ago.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 01 March, 2015, 02:43:27 PM
My nine year old daughter went for a sleepover with one of her friends last night and they decided to give each other a makeover. They couldn't find any hair gel so they decided to use Vaseline instead.

Holy fuck, will this stuff ever come out?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 March, 2015, 03:15:37 PM
Some scrote has been hacking my Microsoft account luckily I had got rid of any payment method info a couple of weeks ago...cunts the lot of them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 01 March, 2015, 03:46:50 PM
They're that for sure Grugz, an awful invasion of privicy but at least no financial harm done. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 March, 2015, 04:58:42 PM
Backed on a bay at Morrison's distribution centre @ about 3pm. I was unloaded by ten-past but am still sat waiting here because fuck knows. Two frikkin' hours, Mr Morrison, is this how you like to spend your Sundays?
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 01 March, 2015, 07:47:07 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 01 March, 2015, 02:43:27 PM
My nine year old daughter went for a sleepover with one of her friends last night and they decided to give each other a makeover. They couldn't find any hair gel so they decided to use Vaseline instead.

Holy fuck, will this stuff ever come out?

Olive oil.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 01 March, 2015, 07:52:46 PM
Rog, google How to remove vaseline from your hair. The e how site seems to have a pretty simple to use 7 step process using handy products from around the house. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 March, 2015, 09:30:29 PM
I have to try and get a doc appointment tomorrow (wish me luck) since Thursday I have had pain all down my arm with a rash and the skin hurts to touch , basically I'm falling apart ,the joys of old age!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 01 March, 2015, 09:39:44 PM
Hals und bienbruch Grugz. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 02 March, 2015, 03:34:26 AM
gedzundheit...

and now I googled that...are you bonkers? the legs are the only bits still working fine ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 March, 2015, 07:37:01 AM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 01 March, 2015, 07:52:46 PM
Rog, google How to remove vaseline from your hair. The e how site seems to have a pretty simple to use 7 step process using handy products from around the house. Z

Thanks. I was all for shaving it off but I got overruled! We found something online that suggested using cornflower before shampooing. After around five washes it seems to be finally coming out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 07:43:25 AM
It could've been worse. My mother loves telling the story of how I, aged five, climbed into a barrel of tar. My clothes were cut off and I had to be washed in petrol!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 March, 2015, 08:10:26 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 07:43:25 AM
It could've been worse. My mother loves telling the story of how I, aged five, climbed into a barrel of tar. My clothes were cut off and I had to be washed in petrol!

I'm disappointed that this anecdote doesn't end with '...and then made stand in front of the fire to dry off'. It's health and safety gorn mad.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 02 March, 2015, 10:04:58 AM
Quote from: Tordelback on 02 March, 2015, 08:10:26 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 07:43:25 AM
It could've been worse. My mother loves telling the story of how I, aged five, climbed into a barrel of tar. My clothes were cut off and I had to be washed in petrol!

I'm disappointed that this anecdote doesn't end with '...and then made stand in front of the fire to dry off'. It's health and safety gorn mad.

These open barrels of tar seem to be everywhere! When will we ever learn?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 02 March, 2015, 10:12:06 AM
Was their any poultry plucking waste around by any chance, Sharky? :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 10:25:59 AM
Heh. I remember my mum telling dad to put his fag out while he was washing my face with a petrol-soaked flannel. No feathers, no, but I did have a chicken's foot at the time. There's no connection but it was fun to play with because pulling the tendons made it grasp and twitch.
.
Hmm - was my childood strange?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 March, 2015, 10:40:50 AM
Isn't Vaseline petroleum based? Just try a match and, as Barry Scott would say, BANG and the grease is gone! (you just then need to convince her that bald is cool!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 02 March, 2015, 11:08:15 AM
Yep DDD one of the main components of homemade Napam and a lit match in a domestic setting??  ;) Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 March, 2015, 11:23:17 AM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 02 March, 2015, 11:08:15 AM
Yep DDD one of the main components of homemade Napam and a lit match in a domestic setting??  ;) Z

Ooh I hope you had some mothballs handy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 02 March, 2015, 01:52:11 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 10:25:59 AM
Heh. I remember my mum telling dad to put his fag out while he was washing my face with a petrol-soaked flannel. No feathers, no, but I did have a chicken's foot at the time. There's no connection but it was fun to play with because pulling the tendons made it grasp and twitch.
.
Hmm - was my childood strange?

We used to get chicken's feet from the butchers shop on a regular basis.

You would play with them until they started to rot and smell funny and then go and get another one. If you were lucky the butcher would throw in a bull's eye too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 March, 2015, 04:00:14 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 02 March, 2015, 01:52:11 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 10:25:59 AM
Heh. I remember my mum telling dad to put his fag out while he was washing my face with a petrol-soaked flannel. No feathers, no, but I did have a chicken's foot at the time. There's no connection but it was fun to play with because pulling the tendons made it grasp and twitch.
.
Hmm - was my childood strange?

We used to get chicken's feet from the butchers shop on a regular basis.

You would play with them until they started to rot and smell funny and then go and get another one. If you were lucky the butcher would throw in a bull's eye too.

Seriously, you people had an Empire?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 March, 2015, 04:14:57 PM
No; our parents had an empire - we swapped it for chicken's feet and bull's eyes. A good deal, I thought.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 02 March, 2015, 05:46:15 PM
Ah, the soul destroying exercise in mind-bending chicken and egg labyrinthine nightmare that is attempting to simultaneously change your UK banking primary contact address, contact phone number and payment authorisation password, all while living in another country/timezone!

Being a grown up rules!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 March, 2015, 09:53:53 AM
Urrgh, the cricket! Ireland chasing SA's 411 for 4, and at 150 for 7. Why must these antipodean games be played when the pubs aren't open. Going to bury my head in the snow until it's over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 03 March, 2015, 09:58:39 AM
Could be worse; you could support the England cricket team.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 March, 2015, 10:04:58 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 03 March, 2015, 09:58:39 AM
Could be worse; you could support the England cricket team.

Practically do, they've stolen so many of our best players...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 03 March, 2015, 10:41:49 AM
If we drop Eoin Morgan now, it will only take five years before he's eligible to play for Ireland again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 04 March, 2015, 03:18:44 PM
... because Zarjaz has to go back to the printers! I've spotted a minor error that thankfully can be fixed without reporting to Mek-Quake. Looks like it might be this time next week before I get them back!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 04 March, 2015, 05:14:10 PM
I have shingles! so far the dr and the wife have offered me bells to wear around my neck while calling "unclean"!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 04 March, 2015, 05:24:40 PM
Painful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 04 March, 2015, 06:16:03 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 04 March, 2015, 05:14:10 PM
I have shingles! so far the dr and the wife have offered me bells to wear around my neck while calling "unclean"!!!

I had a bout of shingles about two years ago, and thankfully it never really amounted to much, but still not nice.
Hope your crop stays under control Grugz!

And on the 'lighter' side; Shingles is midly contagious, but very hard to transmit, or so im lead to believe. But a serial malingerer at my work, enjoyed a full week off, because he claimed he caught it from me.

Some people, eh?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 04 March, 2015, 09:38:29 PM
From what Joe Cornish of Adam and Joe said, you'd have to get quite up in there. And they would also be fairly well diagnosed as faking if your boss ever said "Oh aye, no problem just bring that doctor's note in".
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 04 March, 2015, 10:30:23 PM
You can self certificate for up to a five day period - not counting weekends. Any longer than that you do have to bring in a doctors note upon returning.

So, if you want to swing the lead, then stick to doing it for no more than five days at a time!

IIRC, I took off two days off work, and that was after medical advice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 March, 2015, 08:49:19 AM
My depressions made a small rebound and i'm feeling very down and generally lacking motivation today. I feel like shit TBH.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 March, 2015, 10:03:18 AM
Damn that black dog - keeping mine at bay for now but I can feel it winding up to bite.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 06 March, 2015, 11:10:10 AM
For some inexplicable reason I have the tune to The 12 Days of Christmas stuck in my head.

I don't even know the words
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 06 March, 2015, 11:11:55 AM
On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
A partridge in a pear tree.

On the second day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the third day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the sixth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the seventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the eighth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eight maids a-milking,
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Nine ladies dancing,
Eight maids a-milking,
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the tenth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Ten lords a-leaping,
Nine ladies dancing,
Eight maids a-milking,
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eleven pipers piping,
Ten lords a-leaping,
Nine ladies dancing,
Eight maids a-milking,
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree.

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Twelve drummers drumming,
Eleven pipers piping,
Ten lords a-leaping,
Nine ladies dancing,
Eight maids a-milking,
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a partridge in a pear tree!



You are more than welcome.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 06 March, 2015, 11:23:37 AM
I won a 2000AD Facebook comp! The book arrived!

It's Nikolai Dante's The Great Game, which sits on my shelf in original print form already. Touche life touche.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 11:36:32 AM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 06 March, 2015, 11:23:37 AM
I won a 2000AD Facebook comp! The book arrived!

It's Nikolai Dante's The Great Game, which sits on my shelf in original print form already. Touche life touche.

Ah, sorry to hear that - want something else instead?*


*Note: requested item must be in my 'giveaway store' at this present time ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 06 March, 2015, 11:49:05 AM
I won The Ballad of Halo Jones twice for having 2 letters of the week.

I was happy to donate them to my Son's school library.

Get em young I say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 March, 2015, 11:58:18 AM
Somehow don't think Dante is school material.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 06 March, 2015, 12:20:54 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 06 March, 2015, 11:58:18 AM
Somehow don't think Dante is school material.

Depends. Could easily be placed into a sixth form library of a school.

I mean, if they can dress up as Christian Grey as twelve year olds...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 06 March, 2015, 12:49:24 PM
Quote from: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 11:36:32 AM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 06 March, 2015, 11:23:37 AM
I won a 2000AD Facebook comp! The book arrived!

It's Nikolai Dante's The Great Game, which sits on my shelf in original print form already. Touche life touche.

Ah, sorry to hear that - want something else instead?*


*Note: requested item must be in my 'giveaway store' at this present time ;)

Wow! Thanks Molch. Not sure what you have in your giveaway store but I have Dante up to Tsar Wars (and an Amerika I picked up at a bargain somewhere). Missing the rest though. Other books I would love are Stickleback, Zombo, Kingdom Call of the Wild, Judge Dredd case files 24, Kingdom Call of the Wild, Button Man, Durham Red...

Basicaly anything but earlier Dante collections, the Case files from 1-23, or Sin Dex (got all of em).

Whatever you deign fit to send my way and let me know where I should return the Great Game too. Which btw, I love the new cover etc of this edition :P



Heh looking at the back of the Great Game I think Hawk is dead on the money. Gimp dante with lola...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 01:00:03 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 06 March, 2015, 12:49:24 PM
Wow! Thanks Molch. Not sure what you have in your giveaway store but I have Dante up to Tsar Wars (and an Amerika I picked up at a bargain somewhere). Missing the rest though. Other books I would love are Stickleback, Zombo, Kingdom Call of the Wild, Judge Dredd case files 24, Kingdom Call of the Wild, Button Man, Durham Red...

Basicaly anything but earlier Dante collections, the Case files from 1-23, or Sin Dex (got all of em).

Whatever you deign fit to send my way and let me know where I should return the Great Game too. Which btw, I love the new cover etc of this edition :P

No worries - PM me your address again and I'll pop something in the post. No need to post Great Game back, just pass it on to someone who might appreciate it :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 06 March, 2015, 01:48:57 PM
Quote from: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 01:00:03 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 06 March, 2015, 12:49:24 PM
Wow! Thanks Molch. Not sure what you have in your giveaway store but I have Dante up to Tsar Wars (and an Amerika I picked up at a bargain somewhere). Missing the rest though. Other books I would love are Stickleback, Zombo, Kingdom Call of the Wild, Judge Dredd case files 24, Kingdom Call of the Wild, Button Man, Durham Red...

Basicaly anything but earlier Dante collections, the Case files from 1-23, or Sin Dex (got all of em).

Whatever you deign fit to send my way and let me know where I should return the Great Game too. Which btw, I love the new cover etc of this edition :P

No worries - PM me your address again and I'll pop something in the post. No need to post Great Game back, just pass it on to someone who might appreciate it :)

Why oh why do you hate the fans so..?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 02:25:51 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 06 March, 2015, 01:48:57 PM
Why oh why do you hate the fans so..?

I'm just a really terrible person.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 March, 2015, 03:33:21 PM
Quote from: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 02:25:51 PM
I'm just a really terrible person.

I thought we'd established beyond reasonable doubt that you're history's greatest monster? There was talk of business cards...

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 03:38:10 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 06 March, 2015, 03:33:21 PM
I thought we'd established beyond reasonable doubt that you're history's greatest monster? There was talk of business cards...

Nonono, I'm actually destroying 2000 AD from the inside, remember?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 06 March, 2015, 04:04:31 PM
Quote from: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 03:38:10 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 06 March, 2015, 03:33:21 PM
I thought we'd established beyond reasonable doubt that you're history's greatest monster? There was talk of business cards...

Nonono, I'm actually destroying 2000 AD from the inside, remember?

Genuine LOLing here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 06 March, 2015, 07:09:07 PM
I lost my wallet on the cycle home from work tonight. I put it in the zip up pocket as normal but then forgot to use the zip. Luckily only a tenner in it and the cards were quickly cancelled. A nuisance at the start of the weekend as it delays getting replacement cards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 06 March, 2015, 08:03:40 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 06 March, 2015, 04:04:31 PM
Quote from: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 03:38:10 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 06 March, 2015, 03:33:21 PM
I thought we'd established beyond reasonable doubt that you're history's greatest monster? There was talk of business cards...

Nonono, I'm actually destroying 2000 AD from the inside, remember?

Genuine LOLing here.

Get a room and have a threesome and get it out of your system.

If only there was some pun based on Trifecta, that sort of included a slang word for sexual intercourse... I'd use that. But I can't think of one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 07 March, 2015, 10:45:17 AM
Quote from: Molch-R on 06 March, 2015, 03:38:10 PM
Nonono, I'm actually destroying 2000 AD from the inside, remember?

To be fair, if that's what you're trying to, you're making a terrible job of it...!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 12 March, 2015, 05:02:59 AM
Hotline Miami 2 sitting there on my hard drive but no actual time to play it (i basically work 8am-10pm monday to friday and most weekends). So have to settle for listening to the soundtrack as i work!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 12 March, 2015, 03:30:33 PM
I'm coming down with a cold, just in time for the time off I have next week. By the feel of my throat it will be over the weekend when it kicks in fully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 12 March, 2015, 03:41:37 PM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 12 March, 2015, 03:30:33 PM
I'm coming down with a cold, just in time for the time off I have next week. By the feel of my throat it will be over the weekend when it kicks in fully.

Happens to me every damn time!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 12 March, 2015, 04:06:19 PM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 12 March, 2015, 03:30:33 PM
I'm coming down with a cold, just in time for the time off I have next week. By the feel of my throat it will be over the weekend when it kicks in fully.
I have that same cold. Started this morning.
Head now completely bunged up. Can't taste anything, can't hear anything. On the plus side my eyes still work and I can see how gruesome I look.

We really must stop kissing each other.

You dirty filth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 15 March, 2015, 11:30:39 PM
Fuck it. I was so chuffed at getting a complete bargain new 3DS and 4 games for Tiny Tips burthday that I got the wrong thing. He actually wanted the Monster Hunter 4 3DS xl. Dang! I have until sunday to figure out what to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2015, 09:31:02 AM
My gum abscess is coming back so I'm chewing raw garlic as I can't afford a dental appointment. It stings and I can't see :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 18 March, 2015, 09:37:48 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2015, 09:31:02 AM
My gum abscess is coming back so I'm chewing raw garlic as I can't afford a dental appointment. It stings and I can't see :-(

Some (but not all) NHS walk-in centres have a dentist on-site for emergency dental work. A friend of mine had exactly this thing sorted out completely free after a relatively small amount of sitting around waiting. It must be worth checking to see if there's a centre within feasible travelling distance.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2015, 09:49:37 AM
Thanks, Jim. A friend of mine is in hospital at the moment so I might kill two birds with one stone combine visits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 18 March, 2015, 10:07:39 AM
You'll not be kissing too many girls with your garlic based oral palliative solution there Sharky. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2015, 10:41:49 AM
So, no change there, then. :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2015, 12:44:15 PM
You won't believe this (I can hardly credit it myself) but the abscess has gone down by over 50% since I started chewing garlic at about 9 o' clock this morning. Amazing! Now I just have to wait for my eyesight to come back...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 18 March, 2015, 12:50:11 PM
Couldn't find the key for my bike lock until lunchtime was nearly over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 March, 2015, 04:11:16 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2015, 12:44:15 PM
Now I just have to wait for my eyesight to come back...

that's something entirely different, your mother warned you it'd happen...dirty boy! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 23 March, 2015, 09:11:10 AM
Torn rotator cuff. :/

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Goes my inner monologue all bloody day long for the past 2 weeks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 23 March, 2015, 12:28:01 PM
Terrible news blaze. Hope you heal quickly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2015, 01:56:43 PM
I don't know what that is but I hope you can heal it soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 23 March, 2015, 02:55:25 PM
The bit(s) where your arm pops back into your body. Lots of muscles, nerves... most of the time much less than say an abcess ;) but always, always, always there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2015, 03:18:42 PM
Ouch. Fortunately, I've found a cheap cure for abscesses but I don't think garlic would help in your case :(  Maybe Scotch to dull the pain? ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 23 March, 2015, 03:44:12 PM
In pain, bowel problems!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 24 March, 2015, 09:12:27 AM
ibs or wind? if its the latter we have some gripe water you can borrow...if its the first you have my sympathies as I have yet to find a cure for that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 24 March, 2015, 10:38:59 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2015, 03:18:42 PM
Ouch. Fortunately, I've found a cheap cure for abscesses but I don't think garlic would help in your case :(  Maybe Scotch to dull the pain? ;)

One step ahead. Thank you Duty Free.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 24 March, 2015, 12:34:28 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 24 March, 2015, 09:12:27 AM
ibs or wind? if its the latter we have some gripe water you can borrow...if its the first you have my sympathies as I have yet to find a cure for that.

Talking to me?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 March, 2015, 12:37:49 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 24 March, 2015, 09:12:27 AM
ibs or wind? if its the latter we have some gripe water you can borrow...if its the first you have my sympathies as I have yet to find a cure for that.

I think he is.

"Trapped wind" sounds like a minor niggle, but the first time I had it I was in agony. I'd recently read about twisted intestines in racehorses which is usually fatal, and I became convinced in the wee small hours of the night that this is what I had. After a few hours of pain when I was on the verge of calling an ambulance, I farted mightily and all was well.

IBS cramps aren't fun either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 24 March, 2015, 12:41:51 PM
I always find Rennies actually really work. Or Andrews Salts.....Short of that a bit of coffee....



(Update on my niggle, Doc says it's not torn after some examination, just some massive spasming going on in minor muscles... and lovely lovely codeine now available again.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 March, 2015, 01:52:25 PM
when did youtube automatically start auto-playing one video after another? My home broadband is quite slow (and my PC clogged up with shit), so I often used to click on a vid then look at other things so that when I went back and hit 'replay' I could be confident it had fully loaded and wouldn't buffer half way through. Now I find it's been merrily playing video after video. Or I'd watch a vid and the leave the site open to look at something else, but again it just starts playing another vid straight away.

A minor impediment indeed, but pointless and annoying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 24 March, 2015, 02:02:48 PM
You can switch that off by clocking the little switch above the top video on the right hand side.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tombo on 24 March, 2015, 02:33:08 PM
It started doing that about two weeks ago.  The trouble is the autoplay switches itself back on at random.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 24 March, 2015, 03:16:51 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 24 March, 2015, 01:52:25 PM
A minor impediment indeed, but pointless and annoying.

I found out about that functionality when playing a The Darkness song called "Barbarian" for my 6 year old, as she loves it. Left it with her and it then automatically played "Get your hands off of my woman" by same band. As the song contains several "You c**t"s and loads of "Motherf***ers", it has lead to 'the fear' that she's going to start singing those out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 24 March, 2015, 03:58:27 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 24 March, 2015, 12:34:28 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 24 March, 2015, 09:12:27 AM
ibs or wind? if its the latter we have some gripe water you can borrow...if its the first you have my sympathies as I have yet to find a cure for that.

Talking to me?

i was indeedy ! the bit about wind and ibs following your post about bowel pain gave it away didn't it? ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 24 March, 2015, 04:48:06 PM
Nope :D

Anyway, it's "Bowel Problems", which I believe was caused by tablets to help with my Acid Reflux!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 24 March, 2015, 06:11:13 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 24 March, 2015, 02:02:48 PM
You can switch that off by clocking the little switch above the top video on the right hand side.

which means logging in, which means creating a google account that I don't want .... GRRR
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 24 March, 2015, 07:22:25 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 24 March, 2015, 12:41:51 PM
I always find Rennies actually really work

Nah. He's shit. Him and Molcher are killing 2000ad!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 27 March, 2015, 10:33:03 PM
OK so apparently the OU have cancelled my BSc (hons) degree because of some mix up with Student Finances. I can't access anything that i've done on my profile anymore. I'm fucking fuming what am I going to do?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 March, 2015, 06:24:32 AM
1) Keep calm.
.
2) Find out exactly what the mix-up is.
.
3) Fix it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 28 March, 2015, 01:13:19 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 28 March, 2015, 06:24:32 AM
1) Keep calm.
2) Find out exactly what the mix-up is.
3) Fix it.

Agreed.  Over the years I've found that universities tend to go into lock-down mode quickly with regard to money, but they're pretty cool about things once they have proof that it's being fixed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 28 March, 2015, 06:52:52 PM
Quote from: A.Cow on 28 March, 2015, 01:13:19 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 28 March, 2015, 06:24:32 AM
1) Keep calm.
2) Find out exactly what the mix-up is.
3) Fix it.

Agreed.  Over the years I've found that universities tend to go into lock-down mode quickly with regard to money, but they're pretty cool about things once they have proof that it's being fixed.

I'd second that.  I've done two degrees with the OU and the only thing that locks things down is a missed payment somewhere.  It's usually an easy fix with a few phone calls (normally just one).  I've only experienced it once when they buggered up a direct debit but once it was sorted they got everything back on track PDQ.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 31 March, 2015, 12:37:22 PM
Thank you chaps, thanks to the kind staff at the OU we found what the problem was, my student loan declaration hadn't been filed properly and as a result was still pending with OU finances. This has now been resolved and I have access to all my stuff again. :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 March, 2015, 12:39:26 PM
Good to hear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 March, 2015, 01:05:31 PM
Great stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 31 March, 2015, 08:05:17 PM
Phew! Bit of a relief there, Hawk !!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 01 April, 2015, 07:42:31 PM
The house I have my heart set on and am in the process of buying has brick damage leading to (at the moment) minor damp problems. Basically bricks need cutting out and replacing and damp correction needs to be undertaken ASAP.
I can negotiate with the vendors on who's going to stump up for the cost of this once an expert has given a quote for the work but it's an undeniable ball ache I could do without.

I should think myself lucky I'm in the position to buy a house at all of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 01 April, 2015, 07:49:25 PM
Well it's your heart's love James, it'll work out well. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 01 April, 2015, 10:55:31 PM
Cheers Zen. Fingers crossed!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 04 April, 2015, 10:40:02 AM
Didn't get the Saturday Prog.
Swore under my breath at postie (who had long since departed).

Then realised it's because of Good Friday.

Saturday is not the same without the Prog  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 April, 2015, 10:42:36 AM
Religion ruins everything...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 04 April, 2015, 11:16:33 AM
Try going for a drink in Belfast on Good Friday: the one day of the year you might get away early.   :( Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 April, 2015, 01:54:26 AM
Last post for a while, I think. Being a shit in the real world and it's spilling over here. Play nice all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 06 April, 2015, 02:02:53 AM
Keep well Tordel, be back soon. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 April, 2015, 02:06:29 AM
Don't be gone long, Tordels. Chin up, mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 April, 2015, 08:33:54 AM
Quote from: TotalHack on 06 April, 2015, 01:54:26 AM
Last post for a while, I think. Being a shit in the real world and it's spilling over here. Play nice all.
Tordels with all due respect your never anything below among the most reasonable and generous people on the board. This is a place where the word cunt is thrown around as a term of endearment (sweat nervously, it is right?) and yet your always polite and reserved.

You, being a little shit? What boulderdash!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 06 April, 2015, 11:23:59 AM
Keep well, Tords.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 06 April, 2015, 02:13:10 PM
Aye, keep well Mr T. And please do return once you feel you're able. The forum needs you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 06 April, 2015, 05:20:12 PM
I echo Hawk, Tords.

You are a sensitive chap and too hard on yourself, I suspect you in "being a shit" mode is not a fraction as terrible as some folk on their best days...

- don't go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 06 April, 2015, 05:34:04 PM
What they said.
Your mighty reasonableness is valued round these parts TB, hope you reconsider.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 06 April, 2015, 05:38:38 PM
I'm always in shit mode.
Don't be so hard on yourself.
Let others do that for you.
Then ignore them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 06 April, 2015, 05:47:51 PM
Don't go Tordels, but if you must, return soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 06 April, 2015, 08:23:46 PM
I think after that filth you said about ST:ID it's best you leave these parts Tordel. There's no place for you here with that kind of perfectly valid, eloquent criticism.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 April, 2015, 08:59:41 PM
I'm glad he's gone. His eloquence, kindness, intelligence, insight and wit annoyed me almost as much as his tiny avatar.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 April, 2015, 09:15:10 PM
Quote from: Banners on 06 April, 2015, 08:59:41 PM
I'm glad he's gone. His eloquence, kindness, intelligence, insight and wit annoyed me almost as much as his tiny avatar.

Yeah! Fuck that guy. We're better off without that sort. Probably a poof. Or a foreigner. Or a foreign poof. Here to steal our jobs.

The bastard.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 April, 2015, 09:18:12 AM
we're having a new boiler fitted,so noise and disruption all day!  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 10 April, 2015, 09:46:15 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 10 April, 2015, 09:18:12 AM
we're having a new boiler fitted,so noise and disruption all day!  >:(

Go to the pub for lunch.
Then stay there.  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 April, 2015, 12:20:23 PM
Wanting just a £1.85 packet of "Wheat Bisks", the queues at the mere two tills they had open in Aldi were far too long, and populated with folk who had trollies overspilling with their weekly shop. So, I plonked two pound coins on the till in front of the checkout lady and walked out. Will I get arrested?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 April, 2015, 12:26:32 PM
I hope not, Banners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 10 April, 2015, 12:36:55 PM
Quote from: Banners on 10 April, 2015, 12:20:23 PM
Wanting just a £1.85 packet of "Wheat Bisks", the queues at the mere two tills they had open in Aldi were far too long, and populated with folk who had trollies overspilling with their weekly shop. So, I plonked two pound coins on the till in front of the checkout lady and walked out. Will I get arrested?

For buying "Wheat Bisks"?

I bloody well hope so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 April, 2015, 12:42:14 PM
I couldn't find the Weetabix.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 10 April, 2015, 01:02:50 PM
Wheat bisks taste exactly the same, just much thinner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 10 April, 2015, 02:11:27 PM
Quote from: Banners on 10 April, 2015, 12:42:14 PM
I couldn't find the Weetabix.

That's what they all say  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 April, 2015, 09:27:23 PM
nice shiny boiler in...

...then went to load up the dishwasher with the tea stuff and find a dirty great crack in the door , all the buttons are pushed in and the bloody thing won't switch on....funniuly enough the boiler men failed to mention they'd broken it.

i'll let the wife ring npower first (good cop) then if we don't get any joy i'll go bad cop. very pissed off now after the inconvienience of having workmen in any way ,now this!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 10 April, 2015, 09:42:40 PM
Not good Grugz, sorry about the abject, crass inconsideration of the workmen; boil water, add soap and apply elbow grease. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 11 April, 2015, 12:19:28 AM
Elbow grease. The universal cleaning product.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 11 April, 2015, 04:59:01 AM
Quote from: King Pops on 11 April, 2015, 12:19:28 AM
Elbow grease. The universal cleaning product.

Not for getting sycamore tree sap off skin.  Glad I found out before flaying my own forearm.

(Who'd've thunk that margarine would work better than elbow grease?)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 16 April, 2015, 09:34:03 PM
The alcy downstairs - who often screams at his flatmate for hours on end - has begun issuing abusive ultimatums when we pass in the hallway or he'll sic his "friends in high places" on me.  He also demanded that I never make fun of him to other people, because he'll hear it when he eavesdrops on my conversations.  I am beginning to think he's a bit of an odd duck.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 16 April, 2015, 10:31:46 PM
Sounds like someone needs his ass kicked over his head. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 16 April, 2015, 11:27:59 PM
You have no idea.  Back a ways in the thread I was complaining about the rancid smell of tobacco and skunk weed from downstairs... turns out the other alcy that gets shouted at for hours on end has lung disease and shouldn't be around smoke.  I don't even.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 17 April, 2015, 12:02:22 AM
I feel for you Bear. How's Dickhead? Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 17 April, 2015, 12:43:28 PM
Bear, do you perchance have an ipod or smartphone? ****ish behaviour of course but there is no reason not to use the tools of a surveillance state for actual justice.

I recently had a hotel clerk go apeshit at me because he'd messed up our bookings, he tried to claim we'd subjected him to abuse - and of course, CCTV has no audio so shows me and my wife looking pissed off and no context for it. His word against ours and his word mattered... until my wife pulled out her ipod with a recording of him screaming at us to leave the hotel and me very calmly saying that he was making it all up, if he would just try speaking to someone else we could get this resolved, would he please tell me what was abusive about saying a mistake had been made...

So in other words I have become convinced that no one can argue with recordings. A different case in this matter as it's not turning the tools of officiousness back on themselves - but a few of alcy making threats to you would go well if you ever have need to get authorities involved.

Just a thought. Not something we should need to do but state of the world and all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 18 April, 2015, 11:29:02 AM
The thought of creating the new Shut Up Little Man had crossed my mind, but unfortunately sanity prevailed and I decided the high road was the better option.
For some reason, the high road in this instance meant taking a hammer to my bedroom wall to get at a leak they were complaining about, which revealed a cracked pipe padded with decades-old cladding that, once removed, began gushing where once it was merely dribbling, so now their back room is flooded, and an arctic wind from somewhere in the People Under The Stairs-like wall cavity now blows through the giant hole into the bedroom - that obviously I now cannot use - with an almost-physical ashtray-like stench.  I phoned around eight plumbers and the only one that wasn't busy or not answering their phone said he'd be around in twenty minutes seeing as how it was urgent.  Three hours later he phoned to say he was heading out of town but would be back around 9pm.  At 10pm, for some reason he phoned my dad - who lives elsewhere - and told him that if he (the plumber) didn't show up, he'd "probably show up tomorrow."
Currently waiting.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 April, 2015, 07:49:00 PM
i have a bad back, wasnt too bad yesterday when we went to blackpool,the walking about helped a lot...but today i cannot move ,I tried and the legs gave way and I spent half an hour trying to get back on the sofa... my wife has kindly lent me a vase for the eventual need to pee.

and going back to blackpool ,my daughter gave my wife a right laugh, we went to the Disney shop and I got a chopper from star wars rebels we' split up and agreed to meet back at the car when she'd finished buying primark...my daughter said to her in a loud voice as his her way "I bet dads sat in the car playing with his chopper!"  being nine she doesn't understand why mum and dad keep sniggering... ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 19 April, 2015, 09:36:31 PM
Heh. A good day out. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 20 April, 2015, 10:19:18 AM
i accidently overdosed on strong painkillers last night for my back...weird night!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 April, 2015, 11:11:12 AM
Fucking nob head drivers parking in disabled space because it's closest to the door even when he's completely able bodied! Twat!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 20 April, 2015, 07:18:00 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 20 April, 2015, 10:19:18 AM
i accidently overdosed on strong painkillers last night for my back...weird night!!!
Hope you're okay Grugz. Did you get yourself checked out? Since it was accidental I'm assuming it wasn't that much, but ..
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 20 April, 2015, 07:28:07 PM
aye, just an extra dose or one too early, still a bit spaced but fine, wasn't paying attention being in that much pain... drug free night or two...at least its eased enough for me to get to the loo today and I didn't have to use the vase ;)

just hope its ok by Friday as I have a scan.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 26 April, 2015, 11:38:05 PM
Went into 4 different shops on my way to work and couldn't find a Pear Pickin' Porky in any of them.

The whole world has gone to shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 27 April, 2015, 10:31:12 AM
a what?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JudgeOiNK! on 28 April, 2015, 11:30:14 AM
King Pops, you'd be from Northern Ireland too then I take it?  I'm in the mood for a Pear Picking Porky now too but stuck in work... oh!  Or maybe a Joker!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 28 April, 2015, 12:20:17 PM
Good luck finding any of the feckin things. It would appear Walls have developed a stranglehold on frozen tasty treats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 28 April, 2015, 04:49:22 PM
Quote from: JudgeOiNK! on 28 April, 2015, 11:30:14 AM
King Pops, you'd be from Northern Ireland too then I take it?  I'm in the mood for a Pear Picking Porky now too but stuck in work... oh!  Or maybe a Joker!
The Pear Pickin' Porky was always a classic hangover cure...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 28 April, 2015, 04:57:28 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 28 April, 2015, 04:49:22 PM
Quote from: JudgeOiNK! on 28 April, 2015, 11:30:14 AM
King Pops, you'd be from Northern Ireland too then I take it?  I'm in the mood for a Pear Picking Porky now too but stuck in work... oh!  Or maybe a Joker!
The Pear Pickin' Porky was always a classic hangover cure...

Quite effective too
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 28 April, 2015, 05:32:02 PM
Frack, haven't had one in yonks. Must get some. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 14 May, 2015, 04:35:12 PM
Monday: Buy myself a nice new wallet.

Wednesday: Somehow manage to lose brand new wallet in the 20m between the office and local shop. First wallet I've ever lost.

>:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 25 May, 2015, 11:36:33 PM
Ah, the old: "where did I put that memory stick?" routine.

When will I learn?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 26 May, 2015, 10:49:18 PM
Paypal have "limited" (frozen) my account because of European laws meant to prevent money laundering.  Apparantly what I should have done was close the account when I approached the threshold amount of money that can pass through it, but then open another account using the same details and then keep doing that indefinitely.  Erm...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 26 May, 2015, 11:17:46 PM
I've lost the book I was reading (MaddAdamm) and the 35 year old bookmark in it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 27 May, 2015, 01:32:12 PM
Nothing I can do about it, but the Daily Mail have put a picture of my wife and 1yr old son on their website. The fucking Daily Mail. Grrr!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: NapalmKev on 27 May, 2015, 02:14:58 PM
Quote from: Banners on 27 May, 2015, 01:32:12 PM
Nothing I can do about it, but the Daily Mail have put a picture of my wife and 1yr old son on their website. The fucking Daily Mail. Grrr!

Stick a copy of the the 'Daily Heil' in a pile of Horseshit, take a photo and then ask them to print that instead.

Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 28 May, 2015, 03:40:55 AM
Quote from: NapalmKev on 27 May, 2015, 02:14:58 PM
Quote from: Banners on 27 May, 2015, 01:32:12 PM
Nothing I can do about it, but the Daily Mail have put a picture of my wife and 1yr old son on their website. The fucking Daily Mail. Grrr!
Stick a copy of the the 'Daily Heil' in a pile of Horseshit, take a photo and then ask them to print that instead.

The scary thing is that they probably would print that photo, accompanied by a 20-word headline and an insistence that the photo is "hilarious".  And then another article explaining how the last one had gone viral.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JudgeOiNK! on 28 May, 2015, 02:54:35 PM
Quote from: Banners on 27 May, 2015, 01:32:12 PM
Nothing I can do about it, but the Daily Mail have put a picture of my wife and 1yr old son on their website. The fucking Daily Mail. Grrr!

What have they done this for?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 May, 2015, 05:47:23 PM
They're in a screen grab from a video on YouTube, so I accept that the images are already on the 'net (albeit in video format). I have to be be pragmatic – other people have it far worse, and the story is overwhelmingly positive, even if some of the comments aren't (somewhat predictably).

It's just a bit of a shame that, in general, media outlets are allowed to use – and in a very tiny way, profit from – pictures of 1yr old babies without asking. And, in this specific case, it's just a bit of a shame that it's the fucking Daily Mail.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 May, 2015, 07:31:39 PM
Maybe we should all copyright/trademark our faces. Then, when something like this happens, we can charge the buggers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 29 May, 2015, 01:59:01 PM
Surely if someone uses a picture of you without your permission you can complain to them asking them to take it down? The DM can replace it with a licensed stock photo or one from their own library that would suit their illustration needs just as well?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 29 May, 2015, 02:03:25 PM
Quote from: IAMTHESYSTEM on 29 May, 2015, 01:59:01 PM
Surely if someone uses a picture of you without your permission you can complain to them asking them to take it down? The DM can replace it with a licensed stock photo or one from their own library that would suit their illustration needs just as well?

I don't think you can if the picture was taken in (or more likely from) a public place. Hence pictures of Princess Kate's tits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 29 May, 2015, 02:24:59 PM
Kate's tits are public figures, though, and I think the argument about using someone's image has to be supported by it making some contribution to the public interest to do so.  If the image is used in an objectionable or misleading context you might be able to get it taken down, or if it's being used to advertise something.

I know I joke about the Mail being an online hub for nonces, but the website does actively court an audience that likes to look at pictures of kids - though in fairness, this audience might be comprised mostly of childless menopausal women for all I know.  The Mail is notorious for being more popular with women than with men.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 June, 2015, 04:13:02 PM
 After a nice but exhausting holiday in the lakes I came back to a red card from the postie...thinking it may be a birthday pressie for this coming Saturday I opened it in anticipation to be immediately shot down in flames.
  it was the report of an investigation of allegations of gross misconduct meaning I now have a tribunal to look forward to a week on Friday!
  I have/had worked in that job for nearly 20 years with no problems until a certain person came along and decided I was going cos basically she don't like me. they have broken several of their own policies with the way this and other matters have been dealt with,but the thing that hurts most is that I have seen the interviews of my accusers and one,who I trusted ,has told a complete pack of lies even accusing me of basically assaulting her! ( I apparently threw something at her) and a few others who have basically lied to keep themselves out of triouble by blaming me.
  got my union fella coming down next week to go through it all with me

  I know my career is going on the r.i.p. thread soon they are just going through the motions before they sack me , 20 years of caring for children seeing them grow up and leave and mourning the ones who didn't. I feel so cheated and am now putting my back trouble down the huge blade sticking out of it.
  I have also found out how few friends I truly have as even one I trusted implicitly has ceased contact since I told her and asked if she'd be a character witness having worked with me for so long.

sorry for the rant and apologies for the longer one when I do get binned in advance. I do, however thank God for my wife and daughter who keep me sane and alive.

 

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 01 June, 2015, 04:19:59 PM
Minor impediment my arse!

Sounds like you've been working with a pack of liars and villains. I've nothing to offer but hope for a better job for you in the near future.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 June, 2015, 04:22:44 PM
That sucks, Grugz. Having been through something similar myself I know how truth is no longer a defence. If there's anything I can do, please don't hesitate to ask. In the meantime, don't let the bastards grind you down.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 01 June, 2015, 05:57:37 PM
Quote from: Drinking Problem on 29 May, 2015, 02:24:59 PM
Kate's tits are public figures

Not quite sure that's right.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 01 June, 2015, 06:01:36 PM
Quote from: Drinking Problem on 29 May, 2015, 02:24:59 PM
Kate's tits are public figures

Bit harsh on the weans.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 01 June, 2015, 06:02:29 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 01 June, 2015, 04:13:02 PM

  it was the report of an investigation of allegations of gross misconduct meaning I now have a tribunal to look forward to a week on Friday!
 

been there, done that.
New area manager wanted me out of a very successful branch of Barclays Bank because I disagreed with what they were doing with PPI.

Upshot is they made up lies about me, got two members of staff to back it up, and got rid of me because ' they could not trust me anymore' despite not being able to prove a thing.

Now they have to pay out over a billion pounds because I was right (about PPI) and I have a cushy number as a film critic (well, not just me, but you get the picture.)

Revenge is a dish best eaten with money.

Good luck!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 01 June, 2015, 09:32:17 PM
Good luck Grugz.

Mine really is a minor impediment.

£70 parking fine for being 15 minutes over the 90 minute limit while doing the big shop at a Supermarket.

In true Shark/Seagull fashion I am not paying it.

1) most supermarkets offer 120 minutes - which I would have made.
2) It was first shop at a new supermarket for me. That always takes longer because not everything is in same place.

3) I have to read the allergy information on just about everything I buy because milk is a hidden ingredient in just about every product.

4) They can just fuck off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 June, 2015, 09:57:34 PM
www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/private-parking-tickets
.
chloerichards.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?f=18&t=79217&start=0#.VWzGl-tw3BA
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 01 June, 2015, 10:14:38 PM
If there were any empty spaces then you weren't denying anyone else the ability to park and shop at the store, and therefore you weren't harming the store's profits. Therefore they have no reason to fine you, let alone any justification.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 June, 2015, 10:32:11 PM
we also had the wheelchair hire place accusing us of not sending one of the footrests back.i explained several times to the snotty woman that tnt picked it up besides whinging it wasn't boxed up we forgot to take packing tape on our hols! doh!!! and due to a long boring tale of not getting the chair when it was supposed to we hadn't expected them to collect til Saturday...it was only a dicky satnav that prevented said chair being in alston for the day... my wife has asked them what we are going to do with one rest>? they just wont take our word it went on the van with the rest of it and now theyre threatening to charge us!!!

  after my surprise parcel they can just fuck off as well... been a day I can tell ya! ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 01 June, 2015, 11:34:13 PM
The only real advice I can give is don't tell them you're going to come back after you've been sacked and burn them all with a flamethrower.  You'll just sound crazy.

Although this being the age we live in, you could just pull an Operation Trojan Horse on your antagonist and say they've got it out for you because you're a bloke/not Muslim/Christian/Jewish/whatever and they seem to have some odd outside agenda.  Just turn it right back around by getting something - anything - thrown in their direction to help cast doubt on their reliability.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 02 June, 2015, 08:58:39 AM
Quote from: White Falcon on 01 June, 2015, 09:57:34 PM
www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/private-parking-tickets
.
chloerichards.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?f=18&t=79217&start=0#.VWzGl-tw3BA

Thanks - I've already started the appeals process. Plenty of spaces too so they really are chancing their arm here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 June, 2015, 09:07:44 AM
You're welcome.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 02 June, 2015, 09:18:29 AM
Tips, there is a lot of good info on fighting these parking scrotes here too.

http://forums.pepipoo.com/ (http://forums.pepipoo.com/)

Might be worth a look.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 June, 2015, 09:44:39 AM
Are you on Twitter? I believe that can be effective in shaming big brands about unfair treatment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 02 June, 2015, 10:23:17 AM
Often it gets the people who must protect the brand to intervene over the people whose job is to be a dick.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 02 June, 2015, 11:38:05 AM
Quote from: White Falcon on 01 June, 2015, 04:22:44 PM
That sucks, Grugz. Having been through something similar myself I know how truth is no longer a defence. If there's anything I can do, please don't hesitate to ask. In the meantime, don't let the bastards grind you down.


do you happen to have a supressed rifle and a fast car? ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 June, 2015, 12:18:33 PM
Not since the magistrate took them off me :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 June, 2015, 05:18:18 PM
Spent all day chiselling mortar off old bricks at work. It's been a long time since I had to piss on my hands after work due to bleeding palms and blisters but I do feel like I've done a man's job today. More to come tomorrow but I might just take the nancy-boy route and buy a pair of heavy gloves.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 03 June, 2015, 05:45:42 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 03 June, 2015, 05:18:18 PM
Spent all day chiselling mortar off old bricks at work. It's been a long time since I had to piss on my hands after work due to bleeding palms and blisters but I do feel like I've done a man's job today. More to come tomorrow but I might just take the nancy-boy route and buy a pair of heavy gloves.

That is a miner impediment.


I'll get my coat (and gloves).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 June, 2015, 04:11:20 PM
Something happened today making me suspect that I might be a truly horrible person and the only one in the world who can't see it is myself. Properly upset.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 June, 2015, 05:00:15 PM
It's probably not as bad as you think :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 June, 2015, 07:26:03 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 06 June, 2015, 04:11:20 PM
Something happened today making me suspect that I might be a truly horrible person and the only one in the world who can't see it is myself. Properly upset.

I think I may have disagreed with you at greater length and with more vehemence than anyone else on this forum, and even I don't think you're a horrible person. Far from it. Obviously, I've never met you in person, but all evidence available to me suggests you're a thoroughly decent human being. Don't make me come over there and smack some sense into you...

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 June, 2015, 08:22:30 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 06 June, 2015, 04:11:20 PM
Something happened today making me suspect that I might be a truly horrible person and the only one in the world who can't see it is myself. Properly upset.

being an over-sensitive paranoid, I can relate but as banners says  it might not be as bad as ya think....pm'd
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 June, 2015, 10:47:35 AM
Ah, thanks chaps. Sorry, just having a "woe is me" moment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 07 June, 2015, 06:17:23 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 01 June, 2015, 09:32:17 PM
Good luck Grugz.

Mine really is a minor impediment.

£70 parking fine for being 15 minutes over the 90 minute limit while doing the big shop at a Supermarket.

In true Shark/Seagull fashion I am not paying it.

1) most supermarkets offer 120 minutes - which I would have made.
2) It was first shop at a new supermarket for me. That always takes longer because not everything is in same place.

3) I have to read the allergy information on just about everything I buy because milk is a hidden ingredient in just about every product.

4) They can just fuck off.

Where is it?

Write to the shop, and to the local press.

Write to your local trading standards re the parking operators.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 June, 2015, 11:00:13 PM
Aldi in Irvine.

I have already started the appeal process.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 June, 2015, 11:03:49 PM
M62 was a car park today. It seems three lorries had a thing and they had to shut the motorway. I got to be amongst the thousands stranded behind the incident at J22 and after J23. It was one of those traffic jams you tell your therapist about. The kind where you switch your engine off. The kind where people get out and strike up conversations or try their best not to nettle themselves having a squirt up the verge. Five bloody hours. To get from J23 to J22. Then the cross-country fun commenced.
.
I just looked at the M62 traffic report and that section's still down to two lanes with severe delays. The reason for this, however, has changed from 'Incident' to 'Emergency Repairs.'
.
I know I moan a lot but there's a lot to be proud of as well. 'Emergency Repairs' - already - is a kind of comfort. Not to the poor buggers still stuck in it, of course, but on a social level.  Kind of thing.
.
I'll get me hi-vis vest...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: blackmocco on 10 June, 2015, 05:31:47 PM
My daughter's twelve.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 10 June, 2015, 06:49:51 PM
Was at a family event on Sunday with a lot of children under 7. Now I've gone and caught a sniffle.

I'm coming to believe that children should not be allowed in company unless they've been dipped in iodine and thoroughly deloused first. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rog69 on 11 June, 2015, 02:10:34 PM
Finally went to see Mad Max last night and was sat in front of a mentally handicapped teenage girl who talked, clapped and shouted all through the film.

Naturally it spoiled my enjoyment of the movie and now I feel bad because of feeling bad about it, if that makes any sense at all  :(.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 14 June, 2015, 01:21:08 PM
I'm unemployed for the first time in over twenty years. I used to say the hours are great but the pay's shite, but having resorted to signing on the brew it turns out I'm not eligible for Jobseeker's Allowance, so the pay's even shiter than it was. As someone who firmly believes in the Welfare State, this makes me want my National Insurance contributions back.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 14 June, 2015, 05:34:50 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 14 June, 2015, 01:21:08 PM
I'm unemployed for the first time in over twenty years. I used to say the hours are great but the pay's shite, but having resorted to signing on the brew it turns out I'm not eligible for Jobseeker's Allowance, so the pay's even shiter than it was. As someone who firmly believes in the Welfare State, this makes me want my National Insurance contributions back.

M

Never signed on. Tried it once. Didn't agree with me. Wasn't eligible either because I had principles and therefore did not attempt to sign on for years after becoming unemployed and because my stamps were not up to date they wanted me to travel by train, for six months, to sign on with no money. Fuck it.

Had spent 8 years looking after my Son but because the child benefit went to my partner it did not count. My fault. Obviously.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 14 June, 2015, 06:15:53 PM
Quote from: Mikey on 14 June, 2015, 01:21:08 PMhaving resorted to signing on the brew it turns out I'm not eligible for Jobseeker's Allowance

Consult the Citizen's Advice Bureau and see if you're getting accurate information from the Social Services, because there is a high probability you were lied to about your eligibility for benefits.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 June, 2015, 10:53:48 PM
I have to move off my mate's boat soon but, so far, have not found an alternative place to inhabit. Today I collected together all my remaining stuff, threw a third of it away and stored the rest in a friend's loft. I say "stored" but, to be honest, it felt like I was burying it. I've left myself with a few clothes and a handful of books. My world gets smaller and smaller.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 June, 2015, 01:29:07 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 June, 2015, 02:10:34 PM
Finally went to see Mad Max last night and was sat in front of a mentally handicapped teenage girl who talked, clapped and shouted all through the film.

Naturally it spoiled my enjoyment of the movie and now I feel bad because of feeling bad about it, if that makes any sense at all  :(.

its actually" girl with learning difficulties " and she had as much right to see the film as you did.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 18 June, 2015, 02:03:59 PM
And the film is 'Gentleman with Anger Management Issues'.
Not as snappy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 June, 2015, 02:39:52 PM
The moronic, alcoholic fuck-wit who resides in one of the flats in the house in which I live, has been causing havoc - yet again, for the umpteenth time! - on account of the psychopathic gutter-trash twats that he regularly brings back to his gaff for a shag. This latest creature is but one of a long line of seriously deranged monsters - think of the cast of the Addams Family minus their charm, good looks and social skills - that he has dragged in from the streets, and who then proceed to run amok when he's got what he wanted from them and promptly discarded them afterwards. I had absolutely zero sleep last night on account of this Muppet hammering down the front door, screaming and roaring through the letterbox for most of the night and banging on my window to be let in to see him.

Needless to say, I was not a happy camper going into work this morning, exhausted and agitated in the extreme as I was. And while his latest lunatic conquest was running amok outside the house, this cowardly bastard was hiding in his flat, lacking in both the balls and moral courage to accept his responsibilities and deal with the trouble that he was entirely at fault for bringing to our door.

So when I get home tonight I will be giving him an Ultimatum: Cop yourself on, start acting like a man for a change and stop causing upset and agitation for the rest of us. I'm not normally inclined to go ratting on anyone, but if this creep causes any more problems for me I will be onto the landlord like a shot, requesting that he be removed from the house ASAP. I'm mad as Hell and I'm not going to take anymore!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 18 June, 2015, 02:44:45 PM
You complained to the landlord before?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Zenith 666 on 18 June, 2015, 03:11:34 PM
Paddykafka

As horrendous as this situation is having experienced a similar situation before do not confront him just get him out even if you have to petition the rest of the tenants to convince the landlord to do it.I was working In the apartment block and they had the same problem you had until one morning I came in to what can only be described as a horror show.Having been confronted by two residents the night before over the noise this animal and he can only be described as an animal attacked both with the help of the two junkies he'd brought home that night.There was blood covering wall and floor for two floors and Along with the usual cuts and bruises one had been bitten in the face twice and another was stabbed repeatedly and suffered a broken arm after falling down the stairs trying to flee the attack.Do not underestimate anyone who's repeatedly drunk.Hope you can get a peaceful resolution.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 18 June, 2015, 03:21:02 PM
I agree with Zenith paddyk. Don't do anything yourself. Complain to the landlord and complain every time it happens, as it is happening. Make the landlord feel your distress by waking him at all hours. Also get the police involved every single time. Let them be the heavies (it's what their good at).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 June, 2015, 03:44:52 PM
Thanks for the advice, lads. Its much appreciated. The landlord, for his sins - like the rest of us in the house - has had words with this guy before on many occasions, following complaints he has received from neighbours in the surrounding houses about the noise and aggravation being caused. But when you're dealing with someone who is so utterly selfish that they care about no one and nothing - beyond their own immediate primitive desires - then, frankly, you are on a hiding to nothing.

As landlords go, ours is actually a really decent, kind-hearted gentleman who has put up with more than his fair share of crap from his more wayward tenants. However, I suspect that even his patience has been tested beyond endurance by this latest incident. I know mine certainly has. It is a sad but unfortunate fact, that some people are just too stupid and uncaring about others to know how lucky they are to have a roof over their head. I certainly won't shed any tears if this gob-shite, walking Alco-Pop ends up on the street. He has been given more than enough warnings and chances to change his ways but to no avail.

Whatever happens now is entirely of his own making.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 18 June, 2015, 05:26:20 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 18 June, 2015, 03:21:02 PM
I agree with Zenith paddyk. Don't do anything yourself.

Agreed. Pay someone to burn his place to the ground with him in it.

And make sure you are out that night with a solid alibi.

And Call Saul if you have any problems.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 June, 2015, 06:25:10 PM
Quote from: Fungus on 18 June, 2015, 02:03:59 PM
And the film is 'Gentleman with Anger Management Issues'.
Not as snappy.

" mentally handicapped" isn't "snappy" its an offensive term no decent person would use in these enlightened times just as I would expect other archaic terms for conditions,race and sexual orientation to not be used.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 18 June, 2015, 06:34:23 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 18 June, 2015, 01:29:07 PM
Quote from: Rog69 on 11 June, 2015, 02:10:34 PM
Finally went to see Mad Max last night and was sat in front of a mentally handicapped teenage girl who talked, clapped and shouted all through the film. Naturally it spoiled my enjoyment of the movie and now I feel bad because of feeling bad about it, if that makes any sense at all  :(.
its actually" girl with learning difficulties " and she had as much right to see the film as you did.

Sorry, but it's never as simple as that.

I work regularly with young people who, for whatever reason, cannot control aspects of their behaviour.  They will cross the "acceptable" line (that society draws by consensus) and cause disruption to those in their vicinity.  However, because these young people are visibly different, society cuts them more slack and adjusts its tolerance levels.

It's inescapable, though, that there are points where disruption goes beyond that which can (or will) be tolerated; when the equal opportunities of others are suffering.  In these cases we have no choice but to segregate and to find an alternative way for them to have their right without infringing others' rights.

In the case of Rog69's cinema experience, I fully understand his dichotomy and refuse to condemn him.  He can, at least, take heart in the fact that the young lady enjoyed herself and his sacrifice enabled him to witness that joy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 09:23:15 AM




" there are points where disruption goes beyond that which can (or will) be tolerated; when the equal opportunities of others are suffering.  In these cases we have no choice but to segregate
"

  Mate, I have worked with adults and children with special needs of varying degrees since I was 17,which is a long time, we have a young man with special needs in our extended family .  those comments I have highlighted are  offensive .

   there is a government white paper called "social role valorisation" I recommend you read it ,basically its about normalisation and treating everyone equally ,there is also a "disability discrimination act" . Talking about segregation and going beyond toleration is laughable ,make those comments about gay people or people of a different colour or religion if you dare.
   I don't know where you do work but I hope that they don't share this view on segregation.

 
   

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 19 June, 2015, 09:44:47 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 18 June, 2015, 06:25:10 PM
Quote from: Fungus on 18 June, 2015, 02:03:59 PM
And the film is 'Gentleman with Anger Management Issues'.
Not as snappy.

" mentally handicapped" isn't "snappy" its an offensive term

I didn't say "mentally handicapped", plus it was a (relatively poor) joke on mealy-mouthed politically correct terminology.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 10:52:35 AM
fair enuff
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 June, 2015, 11:28:34 AM
'Granma! You can't say "nig-nogs" any more. It's offensive!'
.
'Offensive to who?'
.
'To the n... to the black people.'
.
'What black people?'
.
'All of them!'
.
'All the black people are listening to us?'
.
'Don't be silly, Granma. It's not about that - it's about understanding and respect for other people.'
.
'All right, Love, I'm sorry I said "nig-nogs."'
.
'Good. Thank you."
.
'And I promise I won't say "nig-nogs" again.'
.
'Granma!'
.
'He, he he. What do you want for your tea?'
.
'Ooh - fish fingers, please!'
.
***
.
'Twas ever thus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 19 June, 2015, 11:51:02 AM
Grugz, no one said she didn't have a right to see the movie. Rog is literally saying that his enjoyment of it was spoiled by noise and disruption but that he understands that the noise and disruption was not something that could be avoided. And that he feels bad. He was being honest about it. Getting up on the high horse doesn't help anyone.

Terminology skipped over as no one is certain or happy with any of the terms.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 11:56:50 AM
he could have moved seat, it was the terminology that bothered me and especially the response from acow.  It wasn't getting on my high horse, I saw a bigoted view of people with special needs and flagged it up as is my right, you don't have to agree with me ,you can go to the local day centre and stand at the gates pointing and laughing if you want to, doesn't make it right though does it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 19 June, 2015, 12:29:01 PM
Surely the term 'learning difficulty' doesn't cover all types of 'mental handicap' though?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 19 June, 2015, 12:32:11 PM
No one is doing that though. The bigoted view is in your imagination, the only evidence you have of this contradicts itself.

Seeing problems where there are none helps no one. If it's fallen to the level of saying 'as is my right' then, there, that's my right to say too - that there's enough real bigotry around that inventing people going to day centres to "Stand at the gates pointing and laughing" is frankly, an insult in itself. Self-defeating, destructive and dependent on a straw man Slaine would be proud to set fire to.









Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 12:47:04 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 19 June, 2015, 12:32:11 PM
No one is doing that though. The bigoted view is in your imagination, the only evidence you have of this contradicts itself.

Seeing problems where there are none helps no one. If it's fallen to the level of saying 'as is my right' then, there, that's my right to say too - that there's enough real bigotry around that inventing people going to day centres to "Stand at the gates pointing and laughing" is frankly, an insult in itself. Self-defeating, destructive and dependent on a straw man Slaine would be proud to set fire to.

talking about segregation isn't bigoted?
if there are no problems as you say then its ok to make a post highlighting a person's special needs as the reason it spoilt his film enjoyment,why not just say "a teenage girl" full stop.?
and the standing at the gates was a sarcastic comment if you couldn't see it.

     
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 19 June, 2015, 01:04:52 PM
Quotetalking about segregation isn't bigoted?

I may be wrong, but I have just had a look down thread, and the only person talking about segregation is you.
Let's all take a step away from the subject and come back when our heads are cooler, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 01:07:59 PM
it was "a.cow" who said it in his post,but you must have missed that, I said my piece and am happy to leave it, I just felt very strongly about something and  chose to highlight it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 June, 2015, 01:56:43 PM
Just writing "teenage girl" with no descriptors wouldn't really convey the heart of the story - which is feeling bad for feeling bad. I don't think the phrase "mentally handicapped" was a particularly bigoted choice of words, given the context. Uninformed, maybe, but no more than that - and we're all uninformed about some things. That said, I thought it was a perfectly reasonable story told in a perfectly reasonable way. Can you imagine, for instance, how the much-missed Mr Godpleton might have related the same experience? We got off lightly, trust me.
.
I can see why the phrase "mentally handicapped" might cause offence - the word "mentally" is ever more synonymous with the word "madly" and "handicapped" is just one up from "crippled" - but isn't "learning difficulties" insulting, or at the very least condescending, as well? The teenage girl in question might have no trouble at all learning things, she may be a genius; her actions and outbursts might well stem from another root entirely. She might have "biological difficulties" or "spiritual difficulties" or be a method actress researching for a play. The point is, we don't know. We don't know so, really, any label is just that; a label, a bit of narrative shorthand to prevent a two-paragraph web-post from becoming a five page short story.
.
It is difficult, though, not only to keep up with politically correct terminology but also to find the correct descriptors for people we encounter but don't know, especially those people who fall outside the general norm. With athletes and artists it's easy, we set them up as aspirational figures to emulate and admire. We don't mind thinking about, being with or taking an interest in these people. But when presented with a still, thin figure in a wheelchair we really don't want to look. The athletes represent the best we can make ourselves, so it's easy to look. The others represent what most people feel is the worst we can become. At any moment, any one of us could suffer an accident or incident of sufficient power to render us similarly positioned - and we don't want to think about that. But we should. "There, but for the grace of God, go I."
.
Anyway, after all that I really don't have an answer as to whether "learning difficulties" is any more or less offensive than "mentally handicapped" or how, or even whether, we should label each other. I am, however, reasonably certain that the post about the spastic in the cinema* was not at all bigoted.
.
* satire.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 19 June, 2015, 02:14:44 PM
Yep, finding the proper terms to describe people's traits can be fraught: how about 'a bunch of annoying wee shites' for the posters on here. Z  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spaceghost on 19 June, 2015, 02:31:30 PM
If I went to the cinema and couldn't enjoy the film because someone was shouting, talking and laughing all the way through it, I'd demand a refund.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 19 June, 2015, 03:10:58 PM
So, when exactly was it decided "mentally handicapped" was offensive, and does that mean charities like Mencap should change their name, (again)?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 June, 2015, 03:19:57 PM
It's political correctness gone cerebrally awry!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Steve Green on 19 June, 2015, 04:23:32 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 19 June, 2015, 03:10:58 PM
So, when exactly was it decided "mentally handicapped" was offensive, and does that mean charities like Mencap should change their name, (again)?

They were talking about it 23 years ago.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/political-correctness-mencap-vows-to-keep-name-despite-row-1534423.html (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/political-correctness-mencap-vows-to-keep-name-despite-row-1534423.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 19 June, 2015, 05:04:04 PM
Here's a link to a piece the government have issued about the use of certain terminology when writing about disability INCLUSIVE LANGUAGE (https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/inclusive-communication/inclusive-language-words-to-use-and-avoid-when-writing-about-disability--2) It's nice and short, so don't worry.

As for saying that segregation is the answer, just what country are we living in and what time period.

I'll end on one for Richmond, as he's the moderator who cooled everyone down. If you looked further back to who started the call for segregation, then you'll find that you called the wrong person out on it, as that person was disgusted by the implication, as we all should be!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 June, 2015, 05:14:29 PM
Nice link.
.
"Avoid phrases like 'suffers from' which suggest discomfort, constant pain and a sense of hopelessness." Hey, I think I may suffer from that; I think it's called life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 05:38:13 PM
 thanks for that CF, wish I knew about that earlier.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 06:21:26 PM
.............and moving on, after coming back from asda I realised my back/hips aren't as well as I thought .
now to decide the strong painkillers or the alcohol  not together as I discovered last time ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 19 June, 2015, 08:59:01 PM
I'm man enough to admit when I get something wrong, and I clearly have in this case.

I'd tried to argue (maybe naively in a forum) that some involuntary behaviour falls outside permissible* limits in its context.

* Like it or not, public institutions such as schools or universities must carry out formal risk assessment on individuals who pose a serious threat of physical or sexual harm to others, whether due to mental health or extreme motor control issues.  In line with their legal responsibilities (including the DDA) they must sometimes exclude such individuals from services & facilities, for the protection of others.

However, my ill-considered use of the explosive word "segregation" has left me looking like a bigot in many people's eyes.  Please believe me when I say I'm not.  I detest social inequality and my disabled wife of 15 years will happily attest to my commitment to the cause.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 09:15:08 PM
hug?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 20 June, 2015, 04:18:57 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 19 June, 2015, 09:15:08 PM
hug?

(sniff) Thank you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 June, 2015, 08:27:01 AM
well my latest plan crshed and burned epicley theres this shop in japan that claims if you request a item they will stock it even exclusives they have been great for ordering thros really rare or exclusives items so I requested some exclusives a week ago they got back to me finally this morning saying they could not get them now I'm looking at the prospect of getting riped off on ebay :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 June, 2015, 07:07:26 PM
How exactly are you supposed to eat a fancy burger served with a thin wooden skewer through it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 June, 2015, 07:34:12 PM
Carefully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 28 June, 2015, 08:20:21 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 28 June, 2015, 07:34:12 PM
Carefully.


Damn. Swooped in before me, ye big Falcon bastard
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 June, 2015, 09:17:44 PM
I am a big wit. At least, I think that's what they say...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 28 June, 2015, 11:33:20 PM
You'll always be a big, bad old Shark to me. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 29 June, 2015, 12:17:54 AM
Moved from a 2 bed flat to a 3 bed house just a 2 minute walk apart - all moved over the weekend, got 2 days to do clean-up of the old place and then all done. My 41 year old body is creaking but I'll be fine tomorrow - got the day off to do the old flat, and reckon we'll get it all done in that day and not need the extra.

What's the impediment, you say?

I've got a fucking ulcer on my tongue - popped up earlier and it's fecking painful. Jeebus!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 29 June, 2015, 03:10:42 PM
Quote from: Doctor Pops on 28 June, 2015, 08:20:21 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 28 June, 2015, 07:34:12 PM
Carefully.


Damn. Swooped in before me, ye big Falcon bastard

Hee hee. At least he gets to eat his burger and pick his nose at the same time without the use of three hands. If he's into that sort of thing.

Must make sure his aim is right though. You don't want an eye ball on the end of that skewer.

Places my mind goes sometimes. Sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 30 June, 2015, 07:05:10 AM
Councils and architects like to put in hardy plants around their buildings that add a bit of greenery but are also covered it thorns and are all knotty which discourages the public from cutting through and creating their own shortcuts.
I understand the logic to some extent but why do they always pick plants that stink like cat piss?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 30 June, 2015, 09:17:07 PM
When you find out that the artist on a dream lettering gig you didn't get didn't even know you'd pitched for it, otherwise he'd have lobbied for you. On the same day you ask to be considered for a brilliant project by $MASSIVENAMEWRITER on the grounds that you're already doing one of his books, only to be told that the artist has already lined up $COMPLETEFUCKINGHACK who, to add insult to injury, is currently sporting a lettering style they basically cribbed off you.

Bah.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 30 June, 2015, 09:47:37 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 30 June, 2015, 09:17:07 PM
When you find out that the artist on a dream lettering gig you didn't get didn't even know you'd pitched for it, otherwise he'd have lobbied for you. On the same day you ask to be considered for a brilliant project by $MASSIVENAMEWRITER on the grounds that you're already doing one of his books, only to be told that the artist has already lined up $COMPLETEFUCKINGHACK who, to add insult to injury, is currently sporting a lettering style they basically cribbed off you.

Bah.

Jim

My work philosophy is to be as useful, professional and honest as possible.
The odd shitehawk or chancer will always piss on your chips or try to discredit you but I think quality and integrity will out in the end.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 04 July, 2015, 07:12:11 PM
after a year on long term sick and a back injury I am now an xxl shirt  :(

lettuce buttys beckon
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 July, 2015, 02:26:13 AM
Today is my birthday - my second without a home. Up at 01:30 hrs, chilly and, due to a transport SNAFU, a fifty minute walk to work beckons. Happy birthday to me! 49 and still a fuck-up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 05 July, 2015, 11:16:01 AM
Happy Birthday! Hope it's getting better as it goes on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 05 July, 2015, 11:30:45 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 04 July, 2015, 07:12:11 PM
after a year on long term sick and a back injury I am now an xxl shirt  :(

At the risk of sounding like a commercial: Slimming World. I've lost 7lbs in a week. I haven't measured anything, calorie counted anything, and most days I've eaten as much food as I wanted. It's fairly low-fat, and low-sugar but, apart from bread, it's pretty generous about carbs. Fancy a fried breakfast? You can have as much bacon as you want, as long as it's lean and you grill it. Scramble the eggs. Baked beans. Grilled tomatoes. You can put as much of that on your plate as you want. Sausages and black pudding are both allowed but count towards your allowance of 'syns' for the day.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 05 July, 2015, 12:25:02 PM
Good stuff Jim: Grugz says he's about to invest in a Belly Wheel, so he may get on this one. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 05 July, 2015, 01:17:22 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 05 July, 2015, 02:26:13 AM
Today is my birthday - my second without a home. Up at 01:30 hrs, chilly and, due to a transport SNAFU, a fifty minute walk to work beckons. Happy birthday to me! 49 and still a fuck-up.

Happy Birthday. Hope your day works out great in the end.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 July, 2015, 02:34:52 PM
Thanks, chaps :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 05 July, 2015, 02:55:57 PM
You should have an email from me that might help make your birthday more memorable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 July, 2015, 04:58:21 PM
I have and it does :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 05 July, 2015, 05:09:23 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 05 July, 2015, 12:25:02 PM
Good stuff Jim: Grugz says he's about to invest in a Belly Wheel, so he may get on this one. Z



:D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 05 July, 2015, 05:18:10 PM
Happy Birthday Sharky/Falcon, and don't be so hard on yourself. You're a good egg, and it sounds like you're working hard, both of which are achievements in this day and age.

I too hope your day only gets better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 05 July, 2015, 09:44:48 PM
Ditto Shark, just keep pushing on. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 July, 2015, 07:32:19 PM
a whhelchair hire company who tried to accuse us of keeping a footrest have used our card details to help themselves to the alleged value of the footrest. so I'm going to be busy shouting at someone tomorrow! >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 06 July, 2015, 07:38:09 PM
Give 'em hell Grugz.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 July, 2015, 07:44:58 PM
oh hell indeedy,and we have had a card withdrawel from an atm in leeds in april for £40 ....we haven't been to leeds since my now 10 yr old was about 3mths old!

check them statements people!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 07 July, 2015, 09:21:01 AM
Was late for my 10:00 meeting because I was watching Dark Souls 2 videos on YouTube.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 07 July, 2015, 11:24:51 AM
yet again I'm scrued out of buying some items I want as its only been released in the USA and philipins again just why does the uk seams to get scrued over so much on releases this http://www.target.com/p/transformers-platinum-edition-seeker-squadron-3-pack/-/A-17077118#prodSlot=_1_1 and a Platinum Edition Trypticon G1 Reissue
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 07 July, 2015, 04:34:50 PM
Been doodeling with a few copic markers I got online. A pack of 12 set me back £25. 'Sigh' I hear you can get them in singles in America, but have yet to see that in any shop here in the UK. A shame, as they are the best alcohol based markers i've ever used.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 07 July, 2015, 05:04:54 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 07 July, 2015, 04:34:50 PM
Been doodeling with a few copic markers I got online. A pack of 12 set me back £25. 'Sigh' I hear you can get them in singles in America, but have yet to see that in any shop here in the UK. A shame, as they are the best alcohol based markers i've ever used.

Copic 'Ciao' markers, £2.55 a pop, sold singly. Almost the entire range. (http://www.artdiscount.co.uk/drawing-illustration/markers/copic-ciao-marker-twin-tipped-markers.html)

If you buy the packs, you inevitably end up with yet another 0.3mm black FineLiner, so I've been buying four or five at a time and have ended up with —I hope!— a fairly nicely balanced set of colours.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 07 July, 2015, 05:10:13 PM
Many thanks Jim! Another resource, having just discovered Tiger Pens a moment ago. I'll be sure to get the most out of both suppliers over the years.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 14 July, 2015, 01:32:46 PM
Heathrow. It is a silly place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 July, 2015, 01:40:07 PM
Quote from: Doctor Pops on 14 July, 2015, 01:32:46 PM
Heathrow. It is a silly place.

apparently, the problem is that it's just not big enough.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: radiator on 15 July, 2015, 02:47:44 AM
Lots in the news lately about this catastrophic earthquake that will apparently happen sooner or later where I live (Oregon, USA), including suggestions that when it eventually does happen it will be the worst national disaster in US history and completely devastate much of the entire North West of the continent. 1 in 3 chance of it happening in the next 50 years, whatever that means...

Really chilling stuff, and to be honest though I love living here so much, these new revelations are really making me consider upping sticks as soon as my contract is up and heading back to UK (up until now was seriously considering staying here for good).

I can't imagine many things worse than being stuck for an indeterminate amount of time in an ill-prepared city following a major disaster. Even less so in a country where so many people own guns. And that's assuming I'm not one of the tens of thousands of people who will die...

http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/07/20/the-really-big-one (http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/07/20/the-really-big-one)

:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 15 July, 2015, 08:40:31 AM
Quote from: radiator on 15 July, 2015, 02:47:44 AM
though I love living here so much, these new revelations are really making me consider upping sticks as soon as my contract is up and heading back to UK

I think it speaks to your unassailable Britishness that you listed this under a thread for minor impediments.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 15 July, 2015, 09:33:13 AM
Enough about earthquakes. What's this thing about dangling dildoes across the city?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 15 July, 2015, 06:07:25 PM
well, the £40 we thought had been nicked in leeds was actually spent by me in blackpool! so that was that sorted.. even thought the girl I reported it to couldn't let me know this from the word go meaning I had to cut my card up for nowt....the wheelchair company however took £65 form our account because they say we lost a legrest even though I have told them til I'm blue in the face that it went in the box with the chair and the other rest and went on a TNT van...who,have since been in touch with a picture of the rest found at a depot and sent it to the company (it looks exactly like the rest we are supposed to have lost even down to the fact it was extednded to oits longest setting for my mum in laws gammy leg. the company (I wont name them yet) tell us its not the one but have kept it anyway.and are still refusing to pay us back...I wrote to trading standards and even the fca ( I'm saving bbc's watchdog til later) and am in a very bad mood.

TNT have been very nice and their customer service has been great btw!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 06 August, 2015, 03:39:34 PM
Capital Newsagents in Tottenham Ct Rd have closed down. They did say they were going to be moving to somewhere nearer Tottenham Ct Rd tube but I haven't found them. It's where I usually get my 2000AD, Megazine and various history and science magazines. They had a great selection and were nice people.

Does anyone know where they've gone?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 August, 2015, 04:02:30 PM
There's a 'phone number here: www.allinlondon.co.uk/directory/1244/6081.php
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 07 August, 2015, 09:24:36 AM
Quote from: radiator on 15 July, 2015, 02:47:44 AM
Lots in the news lately about this catastrophic earthquake that will apparently happen sooner or later where I live (Oregon, USA), including suggestions that when it eventually does happen it will be the worst national disaster in US history and completely devastate much of the entire North West of the continent. 1 in 3 chance of it happening in the next 50 years, whatever that means.

But it could have happened before it hit the news.
(http://oregonstate.edu/ua/ncs/archives/2012/jul/13-year-cascadia-study-complete-%E2%80%93-and-earthquake-risk-looms-large)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: 8-Ball on 08 August, 2015, 09:10:06 PM
My neighbour has gone on holiday for a fortnight and left her three teenage kids to fend for themselves, so you can guess what comes next... PARTY! On Thursday night I arrived home from work to find a paralytic fifteen year old girl sprawled out on the pavement. She was so far gone that she had pissed herself right there on the kerbside and, of course, all her friends were standing around recording it all on their phones. After a night of respite I thought everything had calmed down but no, there are currently about forty rowdy schoolkids next door blaring out shitty house music and generally being obnoxious. And it is only just gone past Nine O'Clock. The party on Thursday lasted until 02:30 on Friday morning. Not looking forward to the next few hours! >:( :( :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 08 August, 2015, 10:25:03 PM
(http://i.ytimg.com/vi/aUFidVw66Mo/hqdefault.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 08 August, 2015, 10:42:07 PM
Phone the cops, you bloody eedjit.  What happens if one of hose kids dies?  It will absolutely hammer your house price, that's what.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: 8-Ball on 08 August, 2015, 11:07:22 PM
Quote from: Scolaighe Ó'Bear on 08 August, 2015, 10:42:07 PM
Phone the cops, you bloody eedjit.  What happens if one of hose kids dies?  It will absolutely hammer your house price, that's what.

I'm in luck. It's starting raining so they've all buggered off to someone else's house. On the subject of calling the cops, that is what the mother said to me before jumping in a taxi to the airport, "If they give you any trouble just phone the police." I was more of the opinion that the little brats should behave themselves so that I didn't have to. I have no intention of getting my car keyed or a brick put through my window just because I spoiled their party.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 09 August, 2015, 12:33:51 AM
Phone the police and say that there's a man with a gun in one of the top rooms.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 August, 2015, 03:31:17 AM
Join the party, drink all their booze, get the girls pregnant, punch the hosts and nick all the best DVDs! Honestly, I sometimes think we've forgotten how to have fun...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 09 August, 2015, 04:36:18 AM
Always phone the police, or at the very least the ambulance service, if you see a situation like that and intervene, if you feel safe to do so. It's always better to be safe than sorry!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 09 August, 2015, 07:23:02 AM
Been awake since 5:30.

M
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 09 August, 2015, 10:32:49 PM
Sterling parenting on display there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 13 August, 2015, 10:13:05 AM
Got holes in my pants. Not the ones which are supposed to be there unfortunately.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 August, 2015, 10:29:14 AM
Thank Grud for the warm weather.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 13 August, 2015, 11:29:47 AM
Got an upset stomach. Meant I got very little sleep.

I don't eat anything sentient. How can it disagree with me?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: NapalmKev on 13 August, 2015, 11:51:06 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 13 August, 2015, 11:29:47 AM

I don't eat anything sentient. How can it disagree with me?

That's Vegism, man. Plants have feelings too*

Cheers

*my Ganja plants told me

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 13 August, 2015, 04:44:21 PM
Yes because only animal based food stuffs are bad for you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 13 August, 2015, 04:53:47 PM
It doesn't disagree with you, that's just a turn of phrase used to denote that a foodstuff has caused your stomach to produce irregular amounts of acid.

Try a caffeine-free mint tea in such circumstances, but be aware late-night tummy rumbles can also be anxiety or stress.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 13 August, 2015, 04:55:30 PM
Could be worse. A woman shat herself in the car park at work today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 August, 2015, 05:10:41 PM
doctor, doctor.... (http://www.lolroflmao.com/2012/03/08/doctor-ive-eaten-something-that-disagrees-with-me/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 August, 2015, 05:24:59 PM
For stomach acid, to which I am a veritable martyr, I swear by bicarbonate of soda; a teaspoon full in a little water.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 August, 2015, 05:29:06 PM
me too, especially after drinking alcohol. Lots and lots of milk is the answer - nothing soothes that burning than a swig o' the white stuff. I find "fizzy" remedies like bicarb or Andrews (can you still get that?) just cause more burping/reflux; whilst calcium carbonate (settlers etc) do very little. If I know I'm going to be drinking wine or spirits, a tiny Pantoloc Control pill beforehand makes a massive difference - prevention rather than cure!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 August, 2015, 05:52:43 PM
I found milk made things worse for me. This is because, I later discovered, milk is rather difficult to digest (for me, at least).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 August, 2015, 06:13:07 PM
ah, that's unlucky. I love the stuff - when I'm rolling home after a boozy night out, I always pop into the 24 hour Spar for a 1 or 2 litre bottle as I know that'll get me through the early morning heartburn attack.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 14 August, 2015, 02:35:49 PM
Got a one week customer site visit scheduled for next week - in Macclesfield. Is there actually anything to do in Macclesfield?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 14 August, 2015, 03:17:18 PM
Go and see the Macc Lads?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 August, 2015, 04:01:18 PM
Quote from: DaveGYNWA on 14 August, 2015, 02:35:49 PM
Got a one week customer site visit scheduled for next week - in Macclesfield. Is there actually anything to do in Macclesfield?

To the east there is some spectacularly beautiful countryside (shame it's pissing down); or head 20 miles North to visit the Greatest City on Earth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 14 August, 2015, 06:37:46 PM
Didn't know Macclesfield was 20 miles below Belfast. X
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 14 August, 2015, 11:49:00 PM
Slow moving trucks on single-carriage A roads. In Wales.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 August, 2015, 08:59:14 AM
I use Twitter as a sort of personalised magazine digest thing, rather than a social whatever, following mainly folk whose work or wit I find interesting - but  I make a point of including a spread of people whose views I generally don't share, because engaging with opposing ideas shapes or changes  your own far better than nodding along.  I try to pick the smarter, politer types from the latter category, because life is short, and there's a better chance of learning something if I'm not puce-faced with indignation.

But then sometimes, as this morning,  I follow links back from one of my anti-tweeps well-argued contra-pieces, and disappear down a boiling rabbit hole of hate that runs for miles beneath the polite surface.  What the hell is wrong with people? How did they end up thinking like this? How many of them are there?  Do they actually mean this stuff they write?  Do they practice it? How can public figures, who present themselves as calm and rational, act as the face for this constituency of the vile?

Feck. I mean feck. What a world.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 15 August, 2015, 10:33:00 AM
Quote from: TotalHack on 15 August, 2015, 08:59:14 AM
I use Twitter as a sort of personalised magazine digest thing, rather than a social whatever, following mainly folk whose work or wit I find interesting - but  I make a point of including a spread of people whose views I generally don't share, because engaging with opposing ideas shapes or changes  your own far better than nodding along.  I try to pick the smarter, politer types from the latter category, because life is short, and there's a better chance of learning something if I'm not puce-faced with indignation.

But then sometimes, as this morning,  I follow links back from one of my anti-tweeps well-argued contra-pieces, and disappear down a boiling rabbit hole of hate that runs for miles beneath the polite surface.  What the hell is wrong with people? How did they end up thinking like this? How many of them are there?  Do they actually mean this stuff they write?  Do they practice it? How can public figures, who present themselves as calm and rational, act as the face for this constituency of the vile?

Feck. I mean feck. What a world.

Humans are territorial apes in disguise and have baggage from upbringing,environment and malfunctioning brain. Prejudice is endemic in all societies and is used as a weapon against individuals or groups seen  as being outside society's norms. Derogatory words are often associated with them and since the abuser usually perceives their target as a threat or simply weak they believe they can be bullied with very little come back. The ease that social media can be used from phones laptops etc has allowed the malicious 24/7 access to it spit bile at the world and anyone they just don't like at that moment. We've all heard of trolling and it's sometimes grin consequences.
Also by insulting someone you identify yourself as his opponent or opposite and this used on social media sites  is often congratulated by other like minded souls who share the same prejudices. Social reinforcement is a powerful tool so the abuser always comes back for more and there's been a whole dearth of people from celebrities to sports personalities who have left social media such is the dire threats they receive. Anyway you sound disturbed and I believe you're from Ireland so I hope it wasn't anything sectarian or indeed racist. There are plenty of good people in the world though sometimes they're not the most vocal of sorts.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 August, 2015, 10:55:05 AM
Ach it was just the usual ultra-sexist drivel, but what disturbs is how it lies just one level below the Twitter accounts of people who present themselves as rigorous intellectual critics of various contemporary trends and assumptions - folk who I disagree with, but whose arguments often have a nugget of truth or insight that tempers my own views, or at least allow me to develop a thoughtful response.

And then to find these supposedly  mild-mannered opponents of 'emotion-led special pleading' to be citing and linking to blogs filled with the vilest kind of reactionary hate, built around the shallowest misappropriated 'evolutionary' and 'natural order' tenets, and decked out with comment threads nested a thousand deep full of braying self-satisfied pricks...

Of course giving in to the view that humanity is fecked because it's dickheads all the way down is exactly what these creatures would have you do. So I won't, but sheesh, does this go on in the heads of people I actually know? I mean I've been around a while now, and I can usually spot a shithead quite promptly, but the sheer quantity of these jerks and the duplicity of their figureheads... I don't know.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 15 August, 2015, 11:48:31 AM
Yes sadly there are many such sites dedicated to misogyny. You have to wonder where they get such strange ideas but of course I suspect the Internet is actually contributing to human stupidity rather than helping to eradicate it. Before extreme views on conspiracy theories to Racial ones were mostly localized in certain area usually around a shop or physical premises. But the Internet has shed any such localizing constraints and extreme and bilious views can be spouted by the faithful from anywhere on the Planet pumping out propaganda 24/7. Ghastly ISIS have become masters at this dark craft convincing others to come join the Caliphate while revelling the slaughter of unbelievers with bloody videos,Web page rants etc.
Some people once they have establish what they believe to be the truth are more than willing to impose it on others and any attempt at dissuading them seems to only reinforce the belief that they must be right all along.
There is a a group in America called Christians against Dinosaurs which believe that Paleontologists spend their time building model fossils,hiding them in the ground then 'discovering' them. Against such pre existing bias and since they clearly believe in the truth of the Bible above any other explanation you can do almost  nothing to change their minds. Their minds are closed to any outside rational discourse. Perhaps you can't educate away prejudice and irrational belief systems as easily as some enlightened thinkers once believed a miserable indictment of the human condition.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 15 August, 2015, 12:50:21 PM
Remember, you can't spell twitter without a twit at one end. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 15 August, 2015, 05:35:09 PM
Ah, the joys of living in a tent. The campsite was practically empty and I was looking forward to a night of uninterrupted sleep before rising at 3am to go to work. But no. With a whole empty field to choose from I now have two immediate neighbours.
.
On my left, Bob Ross clone Captain Kumbayah and his Happy Clappy Kiddies and, on my right, several mountainous ladies of the Shameless Weightwatchers' Club and their assorted flubberous broods. Ffs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 15 August, 2015, 09:12:44 PM
Quote from: White Falcon on 15 August, 2015, 05:35:09 PM
On my left, Bob Ross clone Captain Kumbayah and his Happy Clappy Kiddies and, on my right, several mountainous ladies of the Shameless Weightwatchers' Club and their assorted flubberous broods. Ffs.

And I thought you were a writer, Falcon. Talk about material  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 15 August, 2015, 09:34:08 PM
Sounds like the set up for a Monty Python sketch. One of the naff one's.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 16 August, 2015, 09:08:31 AM
Quote from: White Falcon on 15 August, 2015, 05:35:09 PM
On my left, Bob Ross clone Captain Kumbayah and his Happy Clappy Kiddies...

(http://i1144.photobucket.com/albums/o499/woolly76/hqdefault_zpscke4xin5.jpg) (http://s1144.photobucket.com/user/woolly76/media/hqdefault_zpscke4xin5.jpg.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 August, 2015, 12:11:40 PM
I am a writer, Fungus but, as Hawks suggests, one of the naff ones. Good pic, Woolly, but not enough thatch. I may be out of the tent soon - there might be an old mobile library up for grabs in a month or two. (And I do like the idea of living in one of those - but if I do I might be expected to start solving crimes...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 16 August, 2015, 05:39:09 PM
This sounds like writing gold to me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 August, 2015, 07:48:29 PM
we are still be bugged by cryptosporidium in t'bit of lancashire  we reside in ,but I forgot this morning and brushed my teeth with tap water!!! 


but the morphine I'm on has bunged me up so either I wont explode or it'll just wait to see if my back/hip/displaced disk? gets better and then find out. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 18 August, 2015, 09:09:25 PM
Quote from: Banners on 14 August, 2015, 11:49:00 PM
Slow moving trucks on single-carriage A roads. In Wales.

Is there any other type of driving experience in Wales?  If it's not slow moving trucks it's tractors, caravans, motorhomes or geriatrics that can barely see over the wheel!  What do you expect in a country that only has about 50 miles of motorway to its name?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 19 August, 2015, 07:36:06 AM
Sorry to lower the tone but toilets that can't handle average sized human waste!
Certain toilets seem to block up when you try to flush anything larger than Mars Bar size.
I think all toilets should be able to flush away a whole grapefruit or a gala melon just to be on the safe side.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 19 August, 2015, 10:59:29 AM
So that trip to Macclesfield......it turned out that the location I'm supposed to be going to is actually nearer Knutsford and not Macclesfield. That's OK - just continue on further to Stockport and change over to head to Knutsford. Added an extra hour to the journey, but that was fine.

On-site by 11:30 on Monday - out of there at 4pm, lift back to hotel which is nearly 3 miles away from location and check-in and chill out. Nice place, but smack in the middle of nowhere - literally nothing to do.

Taking advantage of the easy route back to the location and walking it - first walk yesterday took 55 minutes, today's took 45 minutes. Might be able to squeeze that to 40 minutes tomorrow, but will taxi it on Friday as will have my bags with me.

It's all good....annoying but not overly.

It's when the customer asks why people always come in to Macclesfield instead of Crewe, or doesn't stay in a hotel in Knutsford, when there is a shuttle bus that runs from Crewe station as well as Knutsford station to and from the site daily that you go ARGH!!!!

Might be on-site again the week after the bank holiday - I'll be staying in Crewe and shuttling in then, I think.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 19 August, 2015, 12:19:28 PM
Take it they're the ones who said 'Macclesfield' in the first place?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 19 August, 2015, 12:42:50 PM
Well, they have a location in Macclesfield and my boss usually trains to Macclesfield and gets a taxi to 'the site' from there. He, at no point, indicated that 'the site' he went to was the one I'm currently at - he just said 'go to macclesfield and get a taxi to the site'. As the customer actually has a site in Macclesfield, then there was no quibble from me.

It was only on Sunday that I got an email from my contact at the site and I noticed his address in the signature - asked him to confirm location, and then we got things sorted out (hotel hadn't been booked yet, so was all good)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 19 August, 2015, 02:02:25 PM
I'm in Crewe. If you get a chance, visit Beer Dock (http://beerdock.co.uk/) just up from the station – highly recommended.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 19 August, 2015, 08:01:58 PM
So it turns out I have had some sort of intestinal infection this last week. So gaviscon and windeze were never going to help. Tthe Doc says will work itself out in another few days. Probably.  But at least I have some drugs that work on the symptoms now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 19 August, 2015, 08:14:18 PM
Have you tried Zantox? Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 August, 2015, 08:55:15 PM
I read that as gaviscon and windowlene! :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 19 August, 2015, 10:11:29 PM
Quote from: Banners on 19 August, 2015, 02:02:25 PM
I'm in Crewe. If you get a chance, visit Beer Dock (http://beerdock.co.uk/) just up from the station – highly recommended.

I might well do that.

Who am I kidding? Of course I'll do that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 August, 2015, 01:09:41 PM
Quote from: DaveGYNWA on 19 August, 2015, 10:59:29 AM
Might be on-site again the week after the bank holiday - I'll be staying in Crewe and shuttling in then, I think.


No idea if it will still be there, but while I lived in Crewe there was a decent-ish comic shop.  To give you an idea how out of date my scant info may be, the main story I can remember from the time was Judge Dredd: The Exploding Man...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 August, 2015, 01:57:26 PM
Quote from: sheridan
No idea if it will still be there, but while I lived in Crewe there was a decent-ish comic shop.  To give you an idea how out of date my scant info may be, the main story I can remember from the time was Judge Dredd: The Exploding Man...

Think the nearest comic shop is FP in Hanley, successor to the wonderful Fantasy World of my youth. Most of my paper-round money was split between there and the awesome (but long-gone) Mike Lloyd Megastore nearby.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 August, 2015, 10:42:05 PM
Quote from: Banners on 20 August, 2015, 01:57:26 PM
Quote from: sheridan
No idea if it will still be there, but while I lived in Crewe there was a decent-ish comic shop.  To give you an idea how out of date my scant info may be, the main story I can remember from the time was Judge Dredd: The Exploding Man...

Think the nearest comic shop is FP in Hanley, successor to the wonderful Fantasy World of my youth. Most of my paper-round money was split between there and the awesome (but long-gone) Mike Lloyd Megastore nearby.

*heh* same here (except I didn't have a paper-round, and didn't get into buying music 'til long after I'd left the Five Towns).  I did buy Absolution at MLM though, the start of a long slide into Goth.

In addition to being one of the first places I started buying back progs (I think the actual first place was a comic shop in Bristol, while on holiday - guess I hadn't heard of FW at that point), Fantasy World was also where I bought my first issues of White Dwarf, back when it ran Judge Dredd scenarios and material for things-that-weren't-Games-Workshop-products.  Plus a few of the GW JD figures I own.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 August, 2015, 10:51:51 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 20 August, 2015, 10:42:05 PM
In addition to being one of the first places I started buying back progs (I think the actual first place was a comic shop in Bristol, while on holiday - guess I hadn't heard of FW at that point), Fantasy World was also where I bought my first issues of White Dwarf, back when it ran Judge Dredd scenarios and material for things-that-weren't-Games-Workshop-products.  Plus a few of the GW JD figures I own.

Considering the thread, I'd better complain about something.  Ah, Fantasy World, the good old days - tiny 'ground' floor with the counter and magazines on the left and the miniature cabinet on the right, up the stairs with its posters, past the Tshirt racks onward and around the corner to the comics section, with the 2000AD outpost at the far end!  I used to get one or two back progs a week, filling most of the gaps down to 300, breaking that barrier and going in to the sub-300s.  The lower numbers were far out of my price range.

Here comes the moan.

Of course, it all started going downhill when the quotient of movie posters started increasing, and the martial arts weapons marked the turning point.  Got so that (long after I'd moved away from the area) I didn't even really lament it that much when I found out it had been bought out/replaced/whatever by Forbidden Planet.  Speaking of which - I did visit FP while visiting family a few years back.  Better than I may have expected, and different to the other FPs I've been to (London, Manchester and Colchester).  Seems more like an Affleck's Palace kind of shop than your standard FP, but with more tabletop games and comics (mostly graphic novels, don't recall there having been any back progs/issues, but we did only scoot around the once before retiring to a local rock pub).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 21 August, 2015, 03:31:11 PM
spent a lovely morning in a and e getting prodded by a physio,,,i may have a prolapsed disc in my back so on the urgent list for a MR scan and then a follow up appointment in the spinal clinic then possibly another operation! yipee!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 24 August, 2015, 12:31:44 PM
Tryed to get hold of a sub online for the Kikaider Reboot movie for the last few month I cant as the USA has it out on DVD so the only place I can get it from is amazon USA when I try to buy the dam thing I can't because the manafachers are a bunch of dicks who decided to make it a USA exclusive and make shure no one in UK can ever see it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 24 August, 2015, 02:19:04 PM
Sounds rotten Cyber Leader. I can't enjoy the english version of Cyberpunk classic Cyber City Qedo City 808 with it's great UK version soundtrack. Originally shown on Channel 4  it's not available on DVD only the American version is with it's more boring pop OST. Here's a link to Cyber punk perfection!

https://youtu.be/dwBXPsetOHM
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 26 August, 2015, 11:02:23 AM
I was ask to make presentation to at Deaf social club tonight about my illustrator works, and I don't know how to start it!! argh!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 August, 2015, 11:19:13 AM
Start with telling them a bit about yourself and how you got into Illustrator in the first place, maybe?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 August, 2015, 01:03:39 PM
Start with a joke, end with a song.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 26 August, 2015, 01:29:06 PM
Start by drawing a picture.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 26 August, 2015, 01:37:55 PM
Show some hardcore pornography during the presentation and then look embarrassed and say HOW DID THAT GET IN THERE?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 26 August, 2015, 02:10:19 PM
A Rorschach test. The rest is up to them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 27 August, 2015, 10:55:00 AM
just been ripped off,found a kaiyodo stormtrooper on ebay fpr £25 asked the seller if it was genuine ,it had the star5field background in it so took the risk it came today from luton and fell apart in my hands! only the legs remained intact and lacked the ratchet clicking noise, soooo I'm pissed off and now have to wait for the seller to deny all knowledge and for paypal to sort it all out...
  think the moral of this is to pay the silly prices to get something direct from japan.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 27 August, 2015, 11:00:16 AM
Accidentally had a major character death from the new Discworld novel spoiled for myself and it hit me at least as badly as Pterry's leaving us, as does knowing this is it - the last time I'll visit new territory in what was a huge part of the imaginary landscapes of my childhood.  That's my morning ruined.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 August, 2015, 03:32:48 PM
Quote from: Scolaighe Ó'Bear on 27 August, 2015, 11:00:16 AM
Accidentally had a major character death from the new Discworld novel spoiled for myself and it hit me at least as badly as Pterry's leaving us, as does knowing this is it - the last time I'll visit new territory in what was a huge part of the imaginary landscapes of my childhood.  That's my morning ruined.

Who, if I may be so bold as to ask?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 27 August, 2015, 03:46:32 PM
Quote from: Scolaighe Ó'Bear on 27 August, 2015, 11:00:16 AM
Accidentally had a major character death from the new Discworld novel spoiled for myself and it hit me at least as badly as Pterry's leaving us, as does knowing this is it - the last time I'll visit new territory in what was a huge part of the imaginary landscapes of my childhood.  That's my morning ruined.

Guardian review?
It was pretty atrocious.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 27 August, 2015, 03:57:44 PM
That's the one.

Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 August, 2015, 03:32:48 PMWho, if I may be so bold as to ask?

I shan't repeat it here, but the Guardian is only too happy to mention it in the first paragraph of their review.  Wankers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 August, 2015, 04:26:58 PM
How far into the book are you on?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 27 August, 2015, 04:36:28 PM
Right, it's bad enough that I even know about a character dying. If anyone insists on giving away anymore, I will hunt them down, stalk them until I learn their habits, and then one day, when they least expect it, when they're enjoying a nice plate/bag of chips, I will pounce out and piss on them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 28 August, 2015, 12:55:31 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 27 August, 2015, 10:55:00 AM
just been ripped off,found a kaiyodo stormtrooper on ebay fpr £25 asked the seller if it was genuine ,it had the star5field background in it so took the risk it came today from luton and fell apart in my hands! only the legs remained intact and lacked the ratchet clicking noise, soooo I'm pissed off and now have to wait for the seller to deny all knowledge and for paypal to sort it all out...
  think the moral of this is to pay the silly prices to get something direct from japan.

uses the shop mandrake they will offer you a much better price than ebay and because there a chain of stores they only sell ofichil stuff in japan plus the lie on the customs forms so you wont get any custom fees hope this helps you

P.S. you will need to serch in japnises for best results but thats not to hard to do
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 28 August, 2015, 02:41:31 PM
I will try those, cheers cybes!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 28 August, 2015, 11:37:37 PM
I was on  my way to meet a friend earliertoday in West Wickham. ( Actually, I'm on my way back know). Little buggers at the the back of the bus thought it would.be amusing to use the back of my head for target practice with their party poppers and other lobbed rubbish.

Kinda proud of myself in that I didn't react hardly at all, even keeping the in voluntary jumping to a minimum. I hoped the tactic of ignoring their existence would make them bored as reacting may provoke them more, but they continued on and off all the way! Actually, other passengers reacted more than me. I think this was a situation where I probably should have either moved or  confronted them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 August, 2015, 08:46:37 AM
Ehhhn, all depends whether you would have prefered turning your journey into one long and trying shouting match, with the possibility of the driver stopping the bus and the tossers having a grand story for school in the morning.

I get a lot of this on my own commute, and unless it's violent (in particular strung-out parents battering small children, which is all too common), racist/sexist, or destructive of the train, or it's a situation where another more confrontational passenger needs backing up, I've taken to sticking the earphones in and cranking it up.  Although I'm always happy to point out offenders to security, too often sticking your oar in directly results in a louder but still trivial situation, with a good chance that the train will be stopped. When it's 12 journeys a week, and maybe 4 of them have some kind of a fracas, I'm just not prepared to play straight man for my comedy partners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: NapalmKev on 29 August, 2015, 11:36:07 AM
I would have confronted them. Give them a talking-to now and they might reach Adulthood without becoming an absolute Cunt.

Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 August, 2015, 11:47:32 AM
Quote from: NapalmKev on 29 August, 2015, 11:36:07 AM
I would have confronted them. Give them a talking-to now and they might reach Adulthood without becoming an absolute Cunt.

Without corresponding sanctions at home, there is zero chance of achieving anything other than fulfilling their own ends.  They want a barney that they can throw up on whatever social media app hasn't been entirely colonised by business an/or their aunties yet.

Unless there are likely to be serious consequences (violence, harassment of the vulnerable, damage), you are better to deny them the fuel that is adult attention.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 29 August, 2015, 11:48:25 AM
They would be well not to try that shit in Belfast. People are fairly reactive up here. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 29 August, 2015, 11:49:18 AM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 29 August, 2015, 11:48:25 AM
They would be well not to try that shit in Belfast. People are fairly reactive up here. Z

Accentuate the positive!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 29 August, 2015, 11:51:33 AM
Southern wimps. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 02 September, 2015, 10:44:40 AM
When I was younger and in the same age bracket, I open handed slapped one little **** who was flicking rubbish at my mate. The look of shock on his face as he burst into shocked tears was well worth it. Alas now I am older I am less happy about making teenagers cry, even if they deserve it even more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 09 September, 2015, 11:38:51 PM
My honeymoon is over. Two weeks of doing fuck all in the mediterranean with the Missus are done.

However, that's not the point of this post.

When we got home, my Kindle wi-fied up and downloaded the new Terry Pratchett book.

I can go on Holiday with the Missus again, but there won't be a new Terry Pratchett book waiting for me when I get back...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 September, 2015, 12:14:33 AM
Quote from: Mister Pops on 09 September, 2015, 11:38:51 PM
My honeymoon is over. Two weeks of doing fuck all in the mediterranean with the Missus are done.

  you missed the point of the honeymoon then? ;)




.....but getting back to minor impediments,being laid up in hospital meant I missed "force Friday" so trying to find a black series first order stormtrooper at less than scalper prices is becoming hard work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 10 September, 2015, 09:12:43 AM
Back on-site in Macclesfield area again - quite an easy week, as the results of a security test against the environment I installed threw up a small number of issues and they were ones we were already aware of and planned to resolve this week.

The fun is in their test environment where we can't get email functionality working on the BlackBerry devices we're using - been analysing logs from the system I installed, and from the customer's test mail system, and am 100% positive that the issue is on the mail system. "Nah, no problems there...it's working fine. BlackBerry is shit mate, so that's where the problem lies"

So I borrowed his phone, set up an account to the mail system, tried to send an email.....failed (phew....that was a hail mary test)

Off they go - 10 minutes later...."There might actually be a problem on the mail servers"

In your face!!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 11 September, 2015, 09:34:10 PM
once again ive appalyed for a load of jobes and have not got a responce on any of them to make it worses there are no no jobes that I can do that ive not appalyed for where I live and because I'm now out of money and carnt get a job my mum has cannseled all my preorderes which is really anoying as half of them I had to stay awake all night to preorder them I need a job soon or I swere I'm going to go crazy
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 15 September, 2015, 09:26:27 PM
Boilers given up the ghost. It's an ancient device but worked well till now. When the handyman came round to take a look, rusty bits of the interior fell off in his hand and water started leaking from various points. So definitely a full replacement job, which I'd hoped to avoid.

So begins the process of getting the landlord and his (idiot of a) wife to replace it. Hopefully won't be too painful, they are not bad - just she is a bit of a numpty who gets things arse backwards 90% of the time. Hopefully he'll see the email first, it's generally dead easy when it's him rather than her.

Oddly reassured to know that the gas safety check definitely hasn't been done in the last 12 months since it's not happened whilst we've been here, and that the looks of the interior suggest it probably wasn't done in the 12 months before that. Cynic that I am, it's good to have such easy legal ammunition to bring up if heels start dragging.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 September, 2015, 11:32:36 AM
Car just hit by a cyclist not giving way at a junction. We stopped, I checked he was okay (he was), he apologised and then rode off without giving me any details. Big gouge down the side, but nothing I can do about it.

(http://www.aptronym.co.uk/ouch.jpg)

~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 September, 2015, 11:58:34 AM
I feels for ya banners - a cyclist rode into the back of me at a pedestrian crossing last night and then shouted AT ME to watch where I was going - as he rode away he got some loud and expletive laden "advice" about the meaning of the words PEDESTRIAN crossing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 September, 2015, 12:05:05 PM
Cheers... Hope you're okay...?!?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 September, 2015, 12:25:43 PM
yes thanks, just limped for about five minutes - his front wheel went right on to my achilles tendon
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 September, 2015, 12:36:38 PM
Aargh and ouch there, chaps.

My daughter is learning a rather catchy song about an allosaurus in school.  Good good, you say.  BUT the song-sheet is illustrated with clip art of what is quite obviously a cutesified non-specific sauropod, undermining all my hard work on early-years cladistics: as if all the saurischia were interchangeable. Parent-Teacher meeting isn't going to be a one-sided affair this year, oh no.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 18 September, 2015, 01:13:08 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 18 September, 2015, 12:36:38 PM
Aargh and ouch there, chaps.

My daughter is learning a rather catchy song about an allosaurus in school.  Good good, you say.  BUT the song-sheet is illustrated with clip art of what is quite obviously a cutesified non-specific sauropod, undermining all my hard work on early-years cladistics: as if all the saurischia were interchangeable. Parent-Teacher meeting isn't going to be a one-sided affair this year, oh no.
I want to know how the song goes now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 September, 2015, 08:18:26 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 September, 2015, 11:58:34 AM
I feels for ya banners - a cyclist rode into the back of me at a pedestrian crossing last night and then shouted AT ME to watch where I was going - as he rode away he got some loud and expletive laden "advice" about the meaning of the words PEDESTRIAN crossing.

  I can see both sides of this, when I were at school my brakes didn't work at the best of times but as it was pissing it down they didn't work at all, I found this out at the busy junction near school so I stopped by means of a car convieniently parked at the lights.

  and I did miss the woman a few years ago who decided to just walk out in the road right in front of me and she had the cheek to give me abuse!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 18 September, 2015, 09:21:02 PM
Quote from: GrugzI can see both sides of this...

I know you're not being entirely serious, but a situation where I'm looking at £500 estimate for repair – discounted to a still significant £350 excess if I use my insurance and risk buggering my no-claims – with no comeback on the cyclist, can hardly be said to have two equal sides.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 September, 2015, 09:32:11 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 18 September, 2015, 08:18:26 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 18 September, 2015, 11:58:34 AM
I feels for ya banners - a cyclist rode into the back of me at a pedestrian crossing last night and then shouted AT ME to watch where I was going - as he rode away he got some loud and expletive laden "advice" about the meaning of the words PEDESTRIAN crossing.

  I can see both sides of this, when I were at school my brakes didn't work at the best of times but as it was pissing it down they didn't work at all, I found this out at the busy junction near school so I stopped by means of a car convieniently parked at the lights.

Sounds like you were riding on the road where bikes belong (if you're over 12)  - this twat was riding on the pavement and crossing at a pedestrian crossing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 21 September, 2015, 10:52:15 PM
Bastards flying on the pavement are a total hate of mine. I don't move one inch for the pricks Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 September, 2015, 11:20:14 PM
The official repair estimate from when the cyclist went into me is now here, and it seems a hell of a lot...!

(http://www.aptronym.co.uk/quote.png)

How can a cyclist be allowed to go around and cause this amount of damage without any repercussions?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 September, 2015, 11:43:51 PM
Bloody hell, you could buy my car and tax and insure it for 2 years for that!  (That's an offer, by the way).  Does seem ludicrous that there's no comeback for you, but perhaps equally daft that the existing insurance system has left mechanics thinking they can quote that for fixing a nasty scratch and someone will pay it.   
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 22 September, 2015, 10:02:51 AM
Yes, I agree that the quote is preposterous and opportunistic – the car itself can't be worth much more than that. I think that once they knew it'll be an insurance job, the bodyshop just added loads of unnecessary extras to try and get as much as they can. For instance, things like taking out, checking and replacing the windows and lights on the side I was hit, are on the quote for some reason...(!)

Apparent malpractice such as this obviously pushes up everyone's premiums, which is another unfairness, but I'm bound to become guilty of perpetuating it. I've now had another quote for a much lower but still not insignificant £656, but as I'll 'only' be paying the £350 excess towards the repair, I'll be pushing for as much as I can get, and steering the insurance company towards the higher quote for what appears will be a more thorough and better job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 September, 2015, 10:12:47 AM
This system makes pirates of us all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 22 September, 2015, 01:08:50 PM
Quote from: Banners on 21 September, 2015, 11:20:14 PM
The official repair estimate from when the cyclist went into me is now here, and it seems a hell of a lot...!

How can a cyclist be allowed to go around and cause this amount of damage without any repercussions?
People driving cars are allowed to get away with much worse without repercussions.  I was in hospital for most of 2013, still can't walk unaided had many expenses and had to move house as a result.  The police / CPR did nothing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 September, 2015, 01:37:33 PM
Quote from: Banners on 18 September, 2015, 09:21:02 PM
Quote from: GrugzI can see both sides of this...

I know you're not being entirely serious, but a situation where I'm looking at £500 estimate for repair – discounted to a still significant £350 excess if I use my insurance and risk buggering my no-claims – with no comeback on the cyclist, can hardly be said to have two equal sides.

  my apologies if I was appearing too flippant, obviously that prat was at fault if hes caused that damage with no comeback ,if it was a car or motorbike you could have reported him using his reg plate, perhaps there shoud be a similar system for cyclists ,though god knows how theyd go about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 22 September, 2015, 02:00:46 PM
The cyclist is not the bad guy in this - your mechanics are.  Tell them to go fuck themselves.

Do it now.  We'll wait.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 September, 2015, 09:53:33 AM
spent 2 hours looking round my lass' future high school last night and realised my little girl is growing up (sniff)  :'(

  she even passed up the chance of setting a teacher on fire and we blew up a jelly baby.
I also soon remembered I can't stand/walk around for two hours anymore and paid for that later.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 30 September, 2015, 06:36:18 PM
You wait till she goes to uni!  Tears will flow!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 September, 2015, 07:50:31 PM
she's already decided she's doing her vet course at Lancaster so she doesn't have to leave home! any tears will be from the fees
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 30 September, 2015, 08:05:48 PM
So having suffered from M.E. (or CFS, whichever name you prefer) for over seven years my doctor decided to attempt to treat it with a type of steroid. Obviously M.E. is a condition which can't really be treated as such, but there was hope that the steroids would help me manage my energy levels and give me a boost.

Instead of doing that the steroids have burned the inside of my stomach, meaning I'm now desperately hungry but physically unable to eat. The constant pain and feeling of being on the verge of vomiting isn't helping matters much either? :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 October, 2015, 09:51:01 AM
Quote from: Tim Tailz on 30 September, 2015, 08:05:48 PM
So having suffered from M.E. (or CFS, whichever name you prefer) for over seven years my doctor decided to attempt to treat it with a type of steroid. Obviously M.E. is a condition which can't really be treated as such, but there was hope that the steroids would help me manage my energy levels and give me a boost.

Instead of doing that the steroids have burned the inside of my stomach, meaning I'm now desperately hungry but physically unable to eat. The constant pain and feeling of being on the verge of vomiting isn't helping matters much either? :(

that's rough, hope you improve soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 October, 2015, 12:30:45 PM
Report your doctor to the appropriate authorities, that big a fuck up can't be allowed to go unpunished.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 October, 2015, 01:46:54 PM
When did you get your medical degree Hawk?

ME is a condition that's still largely a mystery to medical science. Doctor's will try treatments that they think will help but they don't always work, and I'm sure the doctor was trying this in good faith; so unless there was clear evidence that this would be the outcome. it's ridiculous to call for "punishment". Nobody forces a patient to accept medical treatment, all he needs to do is go back to his doctor and they will change his treatment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 01 October, 2015, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 01 October, 2015, 12:30:45 PM
Report your doctor to the appropriate authorities, that big a fuck up can't be allowed to go unpunished.

It is listed as a potential side effect of the steroids, I was just unlucky enough to be on the receiving end of one of the more severe side effects. I certainly don't attach any blame to my Doctor, who has previously helped a lot with my M.E.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 October, 2015, 01:53:38 PM
Quote from: Tim Tailz on 01 October, 2015, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 01 October, 2015, 12:30:45 PM
Report your doctor to the appropriate authorities, that big a fuck up can't be allowed to go unpunished.

It is listed as a potential side effect of the steroids, I was just unlucky enough to be on the receiving end of one of the more severe side effects. I certainly don't attach any blame to my Doctor, who has previously helped a lot with my M.E.
Well, thats alright then. My initial post was far to harsh anyway and shouldn't be taken seriously. As DDD quite rightly points out, i'm not qualified to judge a working professional in this capacity.

Apologise all round, chaps, and I hope Tim's (current) ailment passess as swiftly as possible, and hope future treatment is more successful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 01 October, 2015, 01:56:08 PM
No worries Hawkmonger. I'm slowly showing signs of recovery; i.e. I'm actually able to eat solid foods again now, albeit not much of it.

Thanks for the concern everyone. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 01 October, 2015, 02:25:52 PM
Hawkmonger - you should read Ben Goldacre's book Bad Pharma. It'll open your eyes to just how little we the public - and I include doctors in that - are told about the side effects of the drugs we are given.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bad-Pharma-companies-mislead-patients/dp/0007350740
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 October, 2015, 06:00:43 PM
or you could just read the leaflet that comes with every medication...

...oh, and don't take iboprufen if you are on warfarin , you will die.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 October, 2015, 06:44:09 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 01 October, 2015, 06:00:43 PM
..if you are on warfarin...

I'd stay away from that rat full stop - huge thing, and vicious.

That sounds utterly shite, Tim - hope your stomach at least is on the mend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 02 October, 2015, 09:34:16 AM
 actually,i'm wondering if I can start a new career as a rat catcher/exterminator? if I bite a rat it could pass on the warfarin and kill them...that or create a new species of warfarin resistant zombie rats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 02 October, 2015, 02:46:11 PM
Or on the other hand, if you are anything like my Father-in-law, the warfarin will leave you unable to play with a puppy for five minutes without turning into anextra from the Walking Dead...

Tim, glad to hear you are making it to more stable land, health-wise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 02 October, 2015, 03:44:24 PM
he has mu sympaties those teethe are sharp! tbh I haven't noticed much difference in clotting times (not that itimed myself before) I cut myself shaving yesterday and assumed there'd be a deluge, however my gums sometimes bleed when cleaning my teeth and there seemed to be a lot today! missed a hospital apt on Monday so it'll be interesting to see what my irn is this week.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: A.Cow on 03 October, 2015, 02:13:52 AM
Quote from: Tim Tailz on 01 October, 2015, 01:49:06 PM
It is listed as a potential side effect of the steroids, I was just unlucky enough to be on the receiving end of one of the more severe side effects. I certainly don't attach any blame to my Doctor, who has previously helped a lot with my M.E.

A friend of mine suffered with (what was diagnosed at the time as) M.E. for most of her 30s & 40s.  Later it turned out she'd been suffering from organophosphate poisoning.

I have no doubt that you've already run the whole gamut of potential cures (just like she did) but I'd recommend looking into OP tests if you haven't already.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 October, 2015, 03:20:54 PM
If they get your dosing stable you'll hopefully be less funny.

Funnily enough I work for one the main software companies in the field now.  I'm not metal, just a dev but get to see the processes for induction and stability.  Interesting stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 October, 2015, 03:22:43 PM
Runny not funny.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 October, 2015, 03:23:23 PM
Medical not metal.  Bloody auto correct.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 04 October, 2015, 03:27:51 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 04 October, 2015, 03:23:23 PM
Medical not metal.  Bloody auto correct.

Does that mean you are metal then?  Or should that be METAL!?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 October, 2015, 09:15:09 AM
BUGGER!  my irn has dropped to a worrying 1.4 ( to about what it would be if I wasn't on warfarin) so they upped my tablets and given me a weeks worth of clexane injections to give myself...not sure why its gone down so dramatically and don't want them clots coming back so,hey ho! ( wifes freaking out about me jabbing myself already)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 06 October, 2015, 05:57:59 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 04 October, 2015, 03:27:51 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 04 October, 2015, 03:23:23 PM
Medical not metal.  Bloody auto correct.

Does that mean you are metal then?  Or should that be METAL!?

hmm, I might be a little.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 06 October, 2015, 05:59:06 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 06 October, 2015, 09:15:09 AM
BUGGER!  my irn has dropped to a worrying 1.4 ( to about what it would be if I wasn't on warfarin) so they upped my tablets and given me a weeks worth of clexane injections to give myself...not sure why its gone down so dramatically and don't want them clots coming back so,hey ho! ( wifes freaking out about me jabbing myself already)

it can take a while to level.  Some people never really seem to.  I have an uncle who's just never really nailed it where many other family members seemed to stabilise during their induction and stay there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 October, 2015, 07:06:10 PM
I was wondering that,like the body's trying to figure out why its not clotting as fast? my bro-in-law got a clot in his leg from an operation just before me and his shot up to 4.5 and I think he's ahd a 1.2
ah well only another 5 months to go (I hope) ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 07 October, 2015, 08:25:15 PM
Good luck!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 07 October, 2015, 09:29:36 PM
cheers, my other blood tests are ok so that's something, and I did find if I jabbed myself with both injections on one side it doesn't sting for as long afterwards :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2015, 12:57:42 PM
I've developed a perianal abscess - nothing serious but literally a huge pain in the arse. Nurse practitioner gave me antibiotics but says if it isn't clearing up after 48 hours, I need to go to A&E to get it sliced open and drained :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 08 October, 2015, 01:23:56 PM
ouch! my sympathies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 October, 2015, 01:31:25 PM
Ouch as well. Hope it clears up soon, DDD.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 October, 2015, 03:49:33 PM
T'aint pleasant, DDD!

Hope the antibiotics do their thing without need for slicey-dicey.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 08 October, 2015, 03:53:52 PM
DDD- That is a nasty little infection, so make sure you don't skip a dose of antibiotic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 08 October, 2015, 05:13:57 PM
my bumhole thanks you all for your sympathy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 12 October, 2015, 07:02:57 PM
<rant> Went for a burton while running this morning (see sports is bad for your health!).  Wife is convinced that it is broken but still able to walk (although somewhat painful) so not really sold.  Estyn in this week (the Welsh version of those fascists from OFSTED) so management are in full mental breakdown / let's blame everyone else mode and I'm in paperwork overload mode trying to dot i's, cross t's and cover my arse.  Next week they decided that they still want to do an internal faculty review as originally scheduled.  It really takes a special kind of ineptitude and ignorance to be a member of a school 'leadership' team. </rant>

[my apologies to anyone who is actually a member of a school leadership team, I'm sure there are some decent ones out there somewhere and one day I will actually meet one]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 12 October, 2015, 09:35:02 PM
after a week on clexane I am still showing an INR of 1.4 (I should be between 2 and 3) which is worrying... sooo, ive another week of the jabs (running out of belly that's not bruised) and a small incease in warfarin.bugger...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 12 October, 2015, 10:31:28 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 12 October, 2015, 07:02:57 PM
<rant> Went for a burton while running this morning (see sports is bad for your health!).  Wife is convinced that it is broken but still able to walk (although somewhat painful) so not really sold.

After extensive research (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gone_for_a_Burton) I have surmised that when you went for a run either a) there was a fatality or b) you went for a beer en route.  Either way, hope your situation improves...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 13 October, 2015, 05:50:57 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 12 October, 2015, 10:31:28 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 12 October, 2015, 07:02:57 PM
<rant> Went for a burton while running this morning (see sports is bad for your health!).  Wife is convinced that it is broken but still able to walk (although somewhat painful) so not really sold.

After extensive research (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gone_for_a_Burton) I have surmised that when you went for a run either a) there was a fatality or b) you went for a beer en route.  Either way, hope your situation improves...

c - tripped and fell.  Improving.  Swollen as hell but not painful any more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 October, 2015, 06:18:58 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 12 October, 2015, 10:31:28 PM
After extensive research (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gone_for_a_Burton) I have surmised that when you went for a run either a) there was a fatality or b) you went for a beer en route.  Either way, hope your situation improves...

Cor, I never knew that (the third one). I love the idea of RAF Coastal Command running a training programme from a tailor's shop. Also relieved a Burton's isn't synonymous with a Barclay's,which was my initial perplexed reaction.

Tjm86, hope the leg continues to improve.

And Grugz, bloody hell man, you are really getting put through the wringer. Keep at it, mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 13 October, 2015, 07:49:49 AM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 13 October, 2015, 05:50:57 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 12 October, 2015, 10:31:28 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 12 October, 2015, 07:02:57 PM
<rant> Went for a burton while running this morning (see sports is bad for your health!).  Wife is convinced that it is broken but still able to walk (although somewhat painful) so not really sold.

After extensive research (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gone_for_a_Burton) I have surmised that when you went for a run either a) there was a fatality or b) you went for a beer en route.  Either way, hope your situation improves...

c - tripped and fell.  Improving.  Swollen as hell but not painful any more.

Ah, I had something similar in January - no running involved, but on the first Monday of the New Year and I fell badly on my leg (which has had a complex fracture previously).  I wasn't sure if it was broken - certainly felt like it, though I have plenty of prescribed heavy-duty painkillers around the house.  Tried to get to see my local GP but after a few days of not being able to get an appointment I ended up in A&E. 

Unfortunately there's not much I can do to avoid future problems like this, all it takes is one person not looking where they're going (of which there are plenty) knocking into me, my landing badly on the bad leg and it all starts up again. 

For me it took about two or three weeks for the swelling to go down (as I say, complex fracture) but hopefully you'll be back to running a little faster!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 13 October, 2015, 11:11:36 AM
I went arse over tit this morning, and that's just trying to walk from the kitchen to the living room!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 14 October, 2015, 12:24:32 PM
now what've we said about putting more water with it? tsk  ;)
hope you're allright tankie
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 14 October, 2015, 12:52:28 PM
I'm fine, thanks Mate, as it happens I do have a toddy last thing at night, maybe I need to cut back!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 15 October, 2015, 12:44:21 PM
My house is falling apart around us and is going to cost so much to fix that I'm considering doing a Reggie Perrin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: NapalmKev on 15 October, 2015, 01:48:43 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 15 October, 2015, 12:44:21 PM
My house is falling apart around us and is going to cost so much to fix that I'm considering doing a Reggie Perrin.

I wouldn't bother starring in a sitcom, you're better off doing a runner ;)

Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 October, 2015, 10:32:41 PM
Spontaneous failure of the hard drive in which resides all the music, movies and TV shows for the Mac Mini that serves as our media centre. Usual disk recovery software isn't offering much hope. I have complete(ish) replica of the music library, but I'm not looking forward to re-ripping all those DVDs, given that most of them are still in boxes in the garage from when we moved house four years ago!

Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 22 October, 2015, 10:49:09 PM
BSG: the [spoiler]insurrection[/spoiler] storyline was good. And Olmos was never anything but brilliant, but mostly it bored the tits off me with it being ponderous, self-important pish. however... the final line, [spoiler]while being part of an atrocious cop-out, was good.  [/spoiler]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 23 October, 2015, 08:27:41 PM
Quote from: Richmond Clements on 22 October, 2015, 10:49:09 PM
BSG: the [spoiler]insurrection[/spoiler] storyline was good. And Olmos was never anything but brilliant, but mostly it bored the tits off me with it being ponderous, self-important pish. however... the final line, [spoiler]while being part of an atrocious cop-out, was good.  [/spoiler]

was that supposed to go here?   http://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=42675.0

have a word with one of the mods and he might move it for you ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 05:25:33 PM
I thought that Brian Blessed and Flash Gordon showing was next Thursday.

But it's November 29th!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 05:33:25 PM
And for some reason it is taking me forever to make this Shepherdless Pie for tea.

Still using spuds and onions from the garden.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 25 October, 2015, 05:56:10 PM
I left my pork casserole leftovers out in a warm kitchen instead of the fridge overnight so have had to chuck it away. Gah. It was nice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 06:04:47 PM
One advantage of not having meat or dairy in the diet; that sort of thing very rarely is a problem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 October, 2015, 06:07:43 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 06:04:47 PM
One advantage of not having meat or dairy in the diet; that sort of thing very rarely is a problem.
(http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/wanna-joke-vegan-club.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 06:15:02 PM
Absolutely.

And I'm not embarrassed about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 25 October, 2015, 06:20:33 PM
Well I've found some sausages in the freezer so Project Dead pig is back on. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 25 October, 2015, 06:49:18 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 25 October, 2015, 06:07:43 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 06:04:47 PM
One advantage of not having meat or dairy in the diet; that sort of thing very rarely is a problem.
(http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/wanna-joke-vegan-club.jpg)

I remember when I went vegan for a couple of years, I didn't bother telling anyone because of the hostility I'd seen it elicit when my veggie mates had mentioned it to anyone.  Curiously, it had always been dragged out of them, or they'd tipped their hand when we went somewhere to eat, so I always wonder where that "veggies are always harping on about it" thing came from.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 October, 2015, 06:55:48 PM
Look up a few posts on this very page and you'll see at least two examples. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 25 October, 2015, 07:24:52 PM
Two of my friends went vegan and every time I went round their house they preached at me and started insulting my food choices. I stopped seeing them. Maybe other people have experienced that born again religion style.

Didn't get the preaching vibe from Tip, I hasten to add. It is one of the minor impediments of meat eating having to be careful about food poisoning. There has to be some advantages to vegetarianism and veganism other than the moral virtue (can't say health as my former friends managed to have the most unhealthy vegan diet possible).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 25 October, 2015, 07:25:20 PM
Quote from: Zombear on 25 October, 2015, 06:49:18 PM
I remember when I went vegan for a couple of years, I didn't bother telling anyone because of the hostility I'd seen it elicit when my veggie mates had mentioned it to anyone.  Curiously, it had always been dragged out of them, or they'd tipped their hand when we went somewhere to eat, so I always wonder where that "veggies are always harping on about it" thing came from.

I get exactly the same thing.  There are people I've known for years who have no idea I'm vegetarian.  Usually the same one who accuse me (and other veg*ns) of harping on about our diet will spend half an hour telling us they'll order two dead pigs just to spite us, etc...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 25 October, 2015, 07:29:15 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 25 October, 2015, 07:24:52 PM
There has to be some advantages to vegetarianism and veganism other than the moral virtue (can't say health as my former friends managed to have the most unhealthy vegan diet possible).

Health is the main advantage, but people who like junk food will always find a way to eat unhealthily.  Assuming they have a balanced diet, decreased risk of heart disease, various types of cancer, diabetes, obesity and hypertension (those were from a university website).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 08:32:52 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 25 October, 2015, 06:55:48 PM
Look up a few posts on this very page and you'll see at least two examples. :lol:

True but compare it to the number of meat, bbq and wot buttonman eats posts and I think you will find it a very small amount.

And when you add in the fact that every single aspect of every day life is advertising meat and dairy production, every supermarket you visit, every advertising hording, every menu, every restaurant front, every "Mmmm. Bacon" post, then I think you will find that vegans aren't the ones banging on about it.

I di my best not to be preachy and not to criticise other people's food choices; I was genuinely just attempting to contribute to Statcgirl's impediment (you will note I said nothing condemning the content of her meal, just the advantages of mine).

But fuck it, if it makes you feel better then yeah, all vegans are militant asshats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 25 October, 2015, 08:40:17 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 08:32:52 PM
But fuck it, if it makes you feel better then yeah, all vegans are militant asshats.
Now your just being silly, I don't think vegans are militant arse hats. I just like to see the world burn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 25 October, 2015, 08:49:22 PM
Given the amount of vile and vehement opposition I get in some places when I actually do proper vegan posts, I feel insane rather than silly.

This is fairly mild and I will assume it is good natured.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 26 October, 2015, 09:34:59 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 25 October, 2015, 07:24:52 PM
Two of my friends went vegan and every time I went round their house they preached at me and started insulting my food choices. I stopped seeing them. Maybe other people have experienced that born again religion style.

Quote from: Hawkmonger on 25 October, 2015, 06:55:48 PM
Look up a few posts on this very page and you'll see at least two examples. :lol:
I am most emphatically not a vegetarian but some of my best friends, etc. Anyone who likes is perfectly welcome to insult my food choices. It's not going to change either what I think of them or what I eat.

It's usually my experience that vegetarians have to put up with an unending stream of tedious pish about "Mmm, bacon!" and "Don't you miss x?" or "How can you live without y?" and "But imagine having a big, juicy steak." Essentially the sort of continuous aggressive proselytising you're both assigning to them as  a group.  It's not really much of a surprise if someone will occasionally react to that.

Of course, people become vegetarian for all sorts of different reasons so it's hard to generalise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 10:11:59 AM
and if you're going to have a go at Tips there's much better reasons than what he eats. He's lived in Scotland for so long and yet I haven't heard him say "Ach aye the noo" once

I thought Flash Gordon was next weekend  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 October, 2015, 10:15:38 AM
OK, everybody chill! I wasn't having a go at Tips, I thought the joviality came off better than it did. Sarcasm and the internet clearly do not mix. I have massive respect for Tips and anyone who can stick to a strict diet, and though I staunchly believe it isn't eating meat that's the problem but battery farming (I avoid this by buying local) that is the issue, a good bit of banter either way is all i was aiming for.

I apologies for any offence that may have been taken.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 10:18:43 AM
I've always wondered why its ok to kill, cook and eat an animal but everyone loses their shit as soon as you fuck one  :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 26 October, 2015, 10:26:04 AM
Heh, you had to go there. :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 26 October, 2015, 11:44:16 AM
Quote from: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 10:18:43 AM
I've always wondered why its ok to kill, cook and eat an animal but everyone loses their shit as soon as you fuck one  :-[
And yet it's completely the opposite with people?!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 12:04:50 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 26 October, 2015, 11:44:16 AM
Quote from: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 10:18:43 AM
I've always wondered why its ok to kill, cook and eat an animal but everyone loses their shit as soon as you fuck one  :-[
And yet it's completely the opposite with people?!

I KNOW! Its political correctness gone mad! Maybe we will see a change in this ridiculous attitude now that the Prime Minister is leading by example.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 October, 2015, 12:37:05 PM
Turned away from my appointment at an NHS Dentist for being 5 mins late (and for which I sincerely apologised). Like a dentist has never kept anyone waiting before...!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 26 October, 2015, 01:11:06 PM
I do believe it's written into nhs policy "thou shalt not be late but be kept waiting"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 26 October, 2015, 01:21:29 PM
mmmm, bacon

(http://images6.fanpop.com/image/polls/1122000/1122143_1348657670936_full.jpg)

is that Cameron following closely?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 26 October, 2015, 01:25:23 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 10:11:59 AM
I thought Flash Gordon was next weekend  >:(

... Checks Ticket...

No, it definitely says 29th November.

And it's a PG.  That must be the sexiest PG ever made.

(After myself of course)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 26 October, 2015, 01:56:02 PM
Recent minor impediment for me - I want to cook for my new lady, who is a vegetarian, but is allergic to tomatoes, so I can't do my signature veg lasagne dish.  Bah! 

Anyone here vegetarian?  Can anyone direct me to some non-tomato recipes please?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 26 October, 2015, 02:09:23 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 26 October, 2015, 01:25:23 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 26 October, 2015, 10:11:59 AM
I thought Flash Gordon was next weekend  >:(
... Checks Ticket... No, it definitely says 29th November.
It's definitely not this week because I briefly thought I wasn't going to make it as I have to move out of my current apartment on 30/11 (minor impediment) but now I can move into the new one on the 16th (sort of okay.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2015, 02:13:12 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 26 October, 2015, 01:56:02 PM
Anyone here vegetarian?  Can anyone direct me to some non-tomato recipes please?

I can unhesitatingly and enthusiastically recommend the Prashad Cookbook (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Prashad-Cookbook-Indian-Vegetarian-Cooking/dp/1444734717/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1445868379&sr=1-2&keywords=prashad) which has loads of really excellent vegetarian recipes utilising all sorts of ingredients. Lots of tomato-less dishes in it.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 26 October, 2015, 02:42:26 PM
Most assume that Quorn can only be cooked by frying, but you can do it up in a bit of vegetable stock or bouillon - a real time-saver when cooking for veggies, as you can add all sorts of veg and seasoning to it near the end.  Good with rice.

In news that will in no way whatsoever have vegetarians shouting HA HA HA FUCK YOU at those who insist on going "MMM bacon" at them, it is now official that bacon gives you cancer (http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/oct/26/bacon-ham-sausages-processed-meats-cancer-risk-smoking-says-who).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 October, 2015, 02:46:44 PM
Quorn is utterly revolting though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 26 October, 2015, 02:48:13 PM
Nowt wrong with raw meat and organic veg though...
EDIT: wait, you cook meat for safety. Oh, I give up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 26 October, 2015, 03:12:31 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 26 October, 2015, 02:46:44 PM
Quorn is utterly revolting though.

Quorn is just compacted fungus and thus has little flavor of its own - hence "vegetable stock or bouillon" - and must be properly cooked.  If you just fry it or put it directly into pies without preparing it properly, you deserve the blandstrosity of a meal that awaits you.
It won't give you cancer, though.  That's one in the plus column.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 October, 2015, 03:26:58 PM
Tried all that, still tastes like shit. Just my two pence mind you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2015, 03:37:51 PM
I'd refer back to that Prashad cookbook, which was somewhat revelatory for us. The problem with, say, putting quorn into a curry as a meat substitute, is that you just find yourself thinking "well, yes, but this would be much nicer with chicken". The Prashad book is full of really good recipes that don't rely on a meat substitute so, instead, you find yourself struck by how much the meal doesn't need meat.

Once you start thinking about cooking vegetables well, rather than cooking the food you would as a meat-eater and substituting something for meat, vegetarian cooking gets a lot easier — there's a really nice Slimming World recipe that has chicken and courgette seasoned with ras el hanout, served with spicy couscous that's delicious... except we wondered how it would be without the chicken and extra courgette instead. Turns out, it's delicious. I had the idea of making a mint & yoghurt dressing to accompany instead of garnishing with mint and it's fucking lovely.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 26 October, 2015, 03:51:23 PM
I am about 80% vegetarian these days due to the Mrs and her tiny appetite for carnivorism.

S'alright really, wouldn't go Vegan due to the lack of cheese but s'all good otherwise! Favourites include Goats cheese & mushroom pasta + this beauty: http://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/2394/summer-couscous-salad

You could easily take out the tomatoes in the latter. Peppers would be a good replacement if you chargrilled them.


If she liked Mexican or Indian, I would be all over those too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2015, 03:54:53 PM
We've had a lot of value out of Hugh Fearnley-Whatnot's Veg Every Day (http://www.amazon.co.uk/River-Cottage-Veg-Every-Day/dp/1408812126/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1445874789&sr=8-1&keywords=hugh+fearnley+whittingstall+veg) book, which has a lot of pleasingly unfaffy recipes.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 October, 2015, 03:55:34 PM
I'm dairy free as it is, due to lactose intolerance but it's not like I miss cheese (do occasionally miss milk though).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 26 October, 2015, 04:01:57 PM
Oh yeah, forgot to mention - she despises eggs, mushrooms and Quorn too.  Bloody pain in the arse she is!!  So much so the last meal we shared at my place was various cheeses and grapes on crackers, with homemade humus that I completely fucked up.  *sigh*

Thanks for the Prashad cookbook idea though - will look into that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2015, 04:19:19 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 26 October, 2015, 04:01:57 PM
Thanks for the Prashad cookbook idea though - will look into that.

Cool. This is that couscous recipe I mentioned: LINK (http://www.goodtoknow.co.uk/recipes/542926/slimming-worlds-spiced-chicken-and-courgette-couscous)

Just leave out the chicken and spice the courgette instead. Leave the tomatoes out of the recipe. If I was doing it without tomatoes, I'd finely slice some onion and fry it with cumin seeds until golden or even darker brown, then stir it through the couscous.

As mentioned, don't garnish with mint, but make a mint dressing: finely chop the mint, mix with fat-free (or not) natural yoghurt. If I was making —say— a mug's worth, which would probably be enough for two, I'd add a tablespoon of lemon juice, half a teaspoon each of salt and sugar, plus a pinch of cayenne pepper. Alternatively, whack a couple of teaspoons of Coleman's mint sauce into the yoghurt if you can't be bothered faffing around with all that. I'd still recommend a pinch of cayenne, though.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 26 October, 2015, 05:23:58 PM
Quote from: shaolin_monkey on 26 October, 2015, 01:56:02 PM
Recent minor impediment for me - I want to cook for my new lady, who is a vegetarian, but is allergic to tomatoes, so I can't do my signature veg lasagne dish.  Bah! 

Anyone here vegetarian?  Can anyone direct me to some non-tomato recipes please?

Try the Deliciously Ella website - lots of lovely stuff there. Not a bit of processed stuff in site.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 26 October, 2015, 05:30:30 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2015, 03:54:53 PM
We've had a lot of value out of Hugh Fearnley-Whatnot's Veg Every Day (http://www.amazon.co.uk/River-Cottage-Veg-Every-Day/dp/1408812126/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1445874789&sr=8-1&keywords=hugh+fearnley+whittingstall+veg) book, which has a lot of pleasingly unfaffy recipes.

Cheers

Jim

Yes - a favourite of ours is his fantastically simple yet tasty Dahl with crispy onions on top. His lemony  guacamole is awesome.

And a really nice new potato, green beans and olives sort of warm salad thing (which OK, I'll admit, I sometimes add Tempeh to)

Cheers for the other link Jim, I shall check that out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 October, 2015, 05:36:00 PM
Now see, i'll eat a meat free meal happily, but I draw the line at a dish where the onion has been anything other than finely diced. A dish where you can taste the onion is a dish ruined. Urgh, hate onions with a passion.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 26 October, 2015, 05:43:05 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 26 October, 2015, 05:36:00 PM
Now see, i'll eat a meat free meal happily, but I draw the line at a dish where the onion has been anything other than finely diced. A dish where you can taste the onion is a dish ruined. Urgh, hate onions with a passion.

Donc tu n'es pas français, puis.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 November, 2015, 01:56:49 PM
Ten days since a boarder had an impediment, eh?

Think I got sunburnt eating lunch on the roof terrace at work today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 05 November, 2015, 11:25:15 PM
Wife's car broke down last Friday, appeared to be a transmission fluid leak. Garage collected it yesterday, called up a little while later to advise that the gearbox was bollixed and needed to be replaced. Called today to provide costs - new one, plus labour = £4,500, second-hand, plus labour = ~£1,000.

Bought the car last year for £1,400, it's 15 years old.....we're having it put down.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 November, 2015, 10:56:06 AM
My daughter got free sparklers from "the range" for last night ,I tried lighting one for her it didn't light straight away then flared up about 4-5 inches burning my thumb ,luckily she wasn't holding it or it might have caused her some serious damage and the buggers lasted 2-3 seconds each .
  So sore thumb today and i'll be wording a strong letter to  the range today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 November, 2015, 07:43:12 PM
Please do, my employers need a kick up the arse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 November, 2015, 11:40:19 PM
I think one of their sparklers might be more effective.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 07 November, 2015, 11:27:11 AM
I think wearing gloves is advisable with sparklers. Particularly the kiddies.

That doesn't let that company off the hook for this mishap though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 07 November, 2015, 07:09:34 PM
she had hers on ,but the way it flared up it might have set them on fire,i dropped the bugger in a bowl of water and it continued to burn underwater!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 November, 2015, 10:32:52 AM
I appear to be lacking a very specific part of the normal human psyche.  It's the bit that apparently creates enormous pleasure from making everyone around you do things to your precise specifications, with added tingles from the degree of inconvenience caused.  It seems to be essential for maximum pleasure that the sole motivating/binding factor should be 'love' or at the very least familial obligation. 

I am wading through an endless sea of family christenings and weddings at the moment, and while I generally enjoy family get-togethers, especially those with food and children, I am simply mystified by the cascade of baroque requirements and implacable demands. Because both the missus and I are presently working ridiculously long hours, as well as juggling the kids,  everything we do has to be scheduled weeks if not months on advance - but despite repeated explicit requests for notice for ANYTHING that we might be expected to do (receptions, rehearsals, breakfasts, who the drokk knows), every day seems to bring a new surprise appointment.

Just one of  today's examples being a fitting for trousers for my 9 year old (a ring bearer apparently, and not the eye-haunted hairy-footed kind), which has to happen in front of the bride's family, has to happen at 1200 today (3 hours notice), or mortal offense will be caused (this last imparted from a 3rd party). Doesn't matter that I'm working all day, my wife is trying to do half a dozen radio interviews, my daughter has to be at a birthday party at the opposite side of the city at the same time, we only have the one car, and it is bollocking down rain.  That the boy has previously tried on said trousers and they are fine, and that this is the third of a projected 8 weekends that will be dominated by one family event or preparations for another, is neither here nor there.

It's lovely that we are wanted, and I do value my family very much, but what is it that people enjoy about compelling others to fulfill the minutiae of their 'day'?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 12 November, 2015, 02:11:51 PM
I found out last evening my sister is getting divorced. Turns out her husband was a real shit to her the last couple of years and has been bad mouthing her to their four kids. He's a jealous prick because she's a dentist and earns most of their money (probably all).

I'm sickened by the whole affair.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 12 November, 2015, 02:27:49 PM
What's his job?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 November, 2015, 02:34:34 PM
Sounds like a toxic relationship fueld by male ego complex if ever I heard one. Tell her to lose some weight by dumping his arse and moving onto pastures new, all the best to her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 12 November, 2015, 02:39:35 PM
We was a teacher, but I also found out that he was using her money for day trading and has lost a very large packet.

She's also being bled dry through a joint account and her current solicitor is shit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 12 November, 2015, 03:01:52 PM
I'm glad she's making moves to protect herself and her finances. She doesn't deserve to look forward to a penurious old age.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 November, 2015, 03:10:38 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 12 November, 2015, 03:01:52 PMShe doesn't deserve to look forward to a penurious old age.

We all got it coming, kid.

But yeah, shitty situation. Speaking as one who gambled* his family's entire finances and lost the lot, and lived (lives) like a parasite off his long-suffering wife, I have no sympathy whatsoever for the arsehole, and hopefully no court will either. 


*Just because it was a business doesn't mean it wasn't gambling - any more than day trading isn't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 12 November, 2015, 03:26:42 PM
Fortunately she's a well paid dentist. Unfortunately she struck out on her own last year and her income has been reduced while she builds her client base again. She'll come out of it in the end, but things will be tight.

What I'm really incensed about is the way he's been talking about her to her kids. They age 8, 8, 11, and 14. They've lived a pretty good life until now, but she'll probably have to cut things back for a while, and kids don't understand why they can't have what they used to have. It could really make things difficult for her if he continues to undermine her.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 November, 2015, 01:46:24 PM
Two pages of Dredd art just turned up today and they have a hole right through them!

The post office have managed to punch a hole right through the Do Not Bend envelope, which had added cardboard inside to add extra protection. I'm stunned that this has happened!

I bought these two pages for Sam as well, as it's the autism story by Mike and Paul.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 November, 2015, 02:30:19 PM
Of course they did - it said "do not bend" not "do not punch big holes through it", they're not mind-readers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Greg M. on 16 November, 2015, 02:45:30 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 November, 2015, 01:46:24 PM
Two pages of Dredd art just turned up today and they have a hole right through them!


That is a horribly frustrating and infuriating situation, and you have my sympathy. I once had a couple of Ace Trucking Co. pages in the mail (from ming of this parish) that nearly suffered the same fate – great big hole punched in the packaging, which was foam-core board, and not exactly flimsy stuff. Art was visible through the hole, but a mylar sleeve provided a last vital defence. Still had a couple of rips in the side of the pages, but it could've been worse. Commiserations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 November, 2015, 02:52:36 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 November, 2015, 01:46:24 PM
Two pages of Dredd art just turned up today and they have a hole right through them!

That's not a minor impediment—that's criminal damage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 November, 2015, 03:08:59 PM
Ahh John that's shite.  And to happen to pages from such a great story too. Just awful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 16 November, 2015, 06:35:14 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 16 November, 2015, 01:46:24 PM

I bought these two pages for Sam as well, as it's the autism story by Mike and Paul.
Putting the immediate disrespect to a pair of pages by Paul Marshal aside, that's a wonderful gesture CF!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 November, 2015, 03:23:44 PM
I have to work one Saturday a month and they've just decided to extend the hours, so instead of 8-1 (which meant I was finishing about the same time I'd be leaving the house anyway after a lie-in and leisurely fry up); it's now 8-4 which means I lose pretty much my whole Saturday. And as nobody knows yet that we are open later, there's hardly anything to do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 23 November, 2015, 05:20:15 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 16 November, 2015, 03:08:59 PM
Ahh John that's shite.  And to happen to pages from such a great story too. Just awful.

That's terrible.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 23 November, 2015, 08:30:47 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 21 November, 2015, 03:23:44 PM
...and as nobody knows yet that we are open later, there's hardly anything to do.

And as anyone will tell you, is a bloody dangerous situation to be in.  That is about the time some muppet of an officer / manager pipes up and says 'well, while it's quiet you can sweep out the hangar!' or some other mind bending useless job like sorting out cargo nets or suchlike.  At least when you're busy they're less likely to bother you.  (please note, I said 'less' rather than 'not'.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 December, 2015, 10:37:27 AM
Client input—before and after.

(http://apt.uk/argh.png)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 02 December, 2015, 11:00:48 AM
I feel your pain, Banners.

I once said to a potential 'client': "I think you are better off just going to a printer."

I'm working on a project now where people think they can hand over any old scraps of paper and that they are usable for adverts. As much as I explain – if artwork exists on a computer pass that on. A crap printout on an inkjet printer of something someone knocked up on Microsfoft Word does not constitute giving me the artwork!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ming on 02 December, 2015, 11:12:26 AM
Quote from: Banners on 02 December, 2015, 10:37:27 AM
Client input—before and after.

That's loony, that is.  The target-like 'Peaceful Schools' symbol, complete with exit-wound effect is particularly brain-grating.  The former is great and the kind of thing you'd get more work off the back of; the latter.... not so much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 December, 2015, 11:19:52 AM
Sheesh, you don't buy a dog and bark yourself, and that there is the reason! Console yourself with the fact that you can use that original crisp, clear design somewhere more deserving in the future.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 02 December, 2015, 11:34:33 AM
Thanks for your understanding, Guys—you're the best :-)

To be the fair, the one on the left was only an initial mock-up (and I wasn't sure about the 'spiral') so you do expect things to change, of course. However, there's a quote I love, and whilst I wouldn't call myself an artist it goes as follows...

"If you commission an artist, you should get what the artist wants you to have, not what you think you want."

It's so great when you can do that for a client—and so frustrating when the opposite happens.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ming on 02 December, 2015, 11:42:14 AM
(http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/graphic-designer-price-list-client-helps-digital-synopsis-2.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 02 December, 2015, 11:57:10 AM
Interesting and dispiriting game of Spot The Difference, there...
As Ming observes, that's 'peace' with added bullet exit wound. Ouch!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 02 December, 2015, 12:24:02 PM
version 1 is far better. Adding a bit more text is fine, but that new logo with the repeated words is horible

See also: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/design_hell (http://theoatmeal.com/comics/design_hell)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 02 December, 2015, 01:11:55 PM
I will probably be around Friends House in June. I'll pop my head in to say the poster's shit and suggest a simpler spiral based design would have been perfect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 02 December, 2015, 06:42:21 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 02 December, 2015, 01:11:55 PM
I will probably be around Friends House in June. I'll pop my head in to say the poster's shit and suggest a simpler spiral based design would have been perfect.
Try the food (not a Quaker, but I have been to the place for lunch before).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 08 December, 2015, 10:27:48 AM
It does have a decent cafe and a nice little garden for breathing in some of the most polluted air in London (also not a Quaker.) The second symbol looks like a virus.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 08 December, 2015, 01:09:36 PM
Just finished a work project for which I literally did a 27 hour shift. No exaggeration, I literally sat at the desk for that long with the longest break being a 20 minute kip and another break to make a meal (bowl of Weetabix). Had a 10 hour sleep last night but didn't recharge the batteries enough.

And that is why I didn't even bother signing up for the advent calendar. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Devons Daddy on 09 December, 2015, 04:32:00 AM
they sent me an email CUFFLINKS you can buy now,

the INCREDIBLE GUYS at PLANET REPLICAS,
due to time differences when i got to the site SOLD OUT!!!!!!

:'(NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 14 December, 2015, 02:17:29 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 08 December, 2015, 10:27:48 AM
It does have a decent cafe and a nice little garden for breathing in some of the most polluted air in London (also not a Quaker.) The second symbol looks like a virus.

Also a couple of doors down, the Wellcome Trust - free entry museum/gallery.  And over the road the Euston Tap/Cider Tap in the gatehouses of the old Euston Station.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 17 December, 2015, 06:22:33 PM
some pillock set off an incendiary device in preston town centre where I was going to go if I couldn't get tickets to star wars. police have released cctv of a suspect in st georges (the other shopping centre) I am going to do some shopping tomorrow instead.

thinking about it the other time we had a bomb scare like this was during gulf war 1 the day I came back from an eventful (and costly-keith,bad advise,soho,basement sex show...) trip to London we had another incedary bomb on preston station.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 17 December, 2015, 11:17:43 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 14 December, 2015, 02:17:29 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 08 December, 2015, 10:27:48 AM
It does have a decent cafe and a nice little garden for breathing in some of the most polluted air in London (also not a Quaker.) The second symbol looks like a virus.

Also a couple of doors down, the Wellcome Trust - free entry museum/gallery.  And over the road the Euston Tap/Cider Tap in the gatehouses of the old Euston Station.

The Tap will probably be my main reason for sticking around the horror of central london.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 18 December, 2015, 07:13:02 AM
Quote from: ming on 02 December, 2015, 11:12:26 AM
Quote from: Banners on 02 December, 2015, 10:37:27 AM
Client input—before and after.

That's loony, that is.  The target-like 'Peaceful Schools' symbol, complete with exit-wound effect is particularly brain-grating.  The former is great and the kind of thing you'd get more work off the back of; the latter.... not so much.

Also, is it just me losing the plot or does the right hand one look a bit like a Haynes manual cover?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 18 December, 2015, 05:04:55 PM
Mrs Panther drove four hours to pick up a new puppy today.

We were assured that this was the last of the litter.  We were told that both parents were former therapy dogs, used to working with kids and in excellent health, and that the whole family loved being around humans.

Got there to find it was a puppy farm, with scared dogs living in joyless kennels.  People are bastards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 December, 2015, 05:24:28 PM
Sounds like they may be overdue a RSPCA inspection. Call Judge Pal!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 18 December, 2015, 05:26:36 PM
Quote from: Modern Panther on 18 December, 2015, 05:04:55 PM
People are bastards.

Which is my motto.
Steal the dogs and burn the kennels to the ground.
That's my advice.
(You may wish to employ a lawyer first).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 18 December, 2015, 05:28:30 PM
Quote from: Modern Panther on 18 December, 2015, 05:04:55 PM
Mrs Panther drove four hours to pick up a new puppy today.

We were assured that this was the last of the litter.  We were told that both parents were former therapy dogs, used to working with kids and in excellent health, and that the whole family loved being around humans.

Got there to find it was a puppy farm, with scared dogs living in joyless kennels.

Thats awful.

I'd contact the RSPCA and inform them about this. Hopefully they'll take an inspection of the place.

My parents used to breed and show Boxers and Shelties (in a loving environment of course!), and some of the horror stories they've heard about other breeders would make you weep.

QuotePeople are bastards.

Yes. Some of them really are  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 December, 2015, 06:32:21 PM
Just some. Most are pretty nice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 18 December, 2015, 06:33:59 PM
Yeah, they're being told.  Mrs Panther works as a dog trainer and she's not averse to loudly telling people off when they mistreat animals.

  In the last month we've dealt with some seriously dodgy characters, including someone who gave a fake address and could only supply a single photo of the dog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 18 December, 2015, 07:15:57 PM
Boiler has given up the ghost, and indeed it's contents through the floor.
That'll be no hot water or heating (not that we need it) for a few days then.

Timing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 December, 2015, 07:39:37 PM
Damn right, Panth. Get the drokkers shut down. Local media, interweb, police - whatever it takes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 19 December, 2015, 11:05:18 AM
Quote from: Minkyboy on 18 December, 2015, 07:15:57 PM
Boiler has given up the ghost, and indeed it's contents through the floor.
That'll be no hot water or heating (not that we need it) for a few days then.

Timing!
This happened to us last year.  The main reason I wish someone would sell plastic comic boxes (and when I asked on another thread the only answer was to get more bloody cardboard boxes).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 19 December, 2015, 02:52:33 PM
Tharg has been hit by the thrill suckers.

I ordered the xmas prog from the shop on the 10th only to find now they're so busy they have no idea when they will be able to send it.

No thrill power this Christmas then  :(

In seriousness that's slow and a bit poor in today's world for something you have in stock.  Good that they're busy of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 December, 2015, 11:44:54 AM
I've had about three days' work in the last three weeks, so I'm skint. Boss rang me up this morning with a "rush job" to Falkirk. Hallelujah! Got half way to work on my bike, struggling against sideways rain, when my 'phone rings again. Job cancelled, sorry. So I biked it back.
.
Just got dry and he rings again - another rush-job, this time to Barnsley. Got half-way back to work, still raining sideways, job cancelled again.
.
This must be God's way of keeping me fit and lean. Or something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 21 December, 2015, 01:18:07 PM
That is a disgrace Shark. I'm livid reading this. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 21 December, 2015, 02:06:10 PM
Unbelievable sharky. God will have His little jokes though. Chin up and all that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 December, 2015, 03:15:29 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 21 December, 2015, 02:06:10 PM
Unbelievable sharky. God will have His little jokes though. Chin up and all that.

Sharky's doing deliveries for GOD now? Wow, never knew He was such a crappy employer!

Sounds miserable Shark, Chin up mate!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 December, 2015, 03:30:28 PM
That is absolute rubbishy sharky.

On mine.. Tharg has seen off the thrill suckers and it will be on the way.

They responded to me quickly via Twitter  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 21 December, 2015, 04:05:30 PM
Praise Tharg. Though his pranks at weather control are rather tasteless...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 December, 2015, 05:17:21 PM
 :lol: true dat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 21 December, 2015, 05:41:56 PM
Main internet is down in the Mardroid refuelling station. Thank goodness for my built in data implant* although that keeps disconnecting too.

I just hope its sorted by Christmas. My creator** called the phone/broadband company earlier so at least they should be sorting things.

Speaking of going in to work, I'm supposed to be on Christmas holiday this week. (And the next two. One of the perks of being an administration-bot for a college. Downside: you have to take time off, but you have to use up allotted holiday if you wish to he paid for it. Holiday you might have wished to use elsewhere.) Late this afternoon I get an email from boss asking if I'm at my desk...

He sent it around 10:30, although I didn't get it until around 4pm. (My shaky phone internet, I guess. It's been very windy today so I wonder if something broke somewhere....)

I did wonder as a colleague sent out a couple of Google Calendar appointments Friday and included me in it. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to be there or she was just keeping me abbridged of the situation. It wasn't something I was really needed for I don't think so I decided to interpret it as the latter unless I got a direct message or call which never arrived. On time, anyway.

Not as annoying as Sharky's work issues. That's a great big pain in the botty.

*Strictly its built into my mobile phone but it's fun playing with the 'I am a robot' analogy.

** Otherwise known as 'Dad'. 'Co-creator' might be more accurate as he had a female partner involved....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 December, 2015, 08:00:40 PM
Thanks, chaps. A little later, a third call came for me to go to Goldthorpe - this one stuck. However, I went over my hours due to horrid traffic on the M62 and couldn't make my next pick-up. It's only a few minutes but I'm going to get a massive bollocking for it.
.
#can't_effing_win.com
.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 December, 2015, 09:02:45 PM
 :( sorry dude.  Crappy day for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 December, 2015, 09:32:04 PM
Ah well, in a hundred years, who's gonna' care? Home in one piece, that's the main thing :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 December, 2015, 09:35:53 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 December, 2015, 09:32:04 PM
Ah well, in a hundred years, who's gonna' care? Home in one piece, that's the main thing :)

Haha.  That is such a good spirit mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 21 December, 2015, 09:56:25 PM
Good stuff there both of you lads. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 December, 2015, 10:11:14 PM
Thanks, chaps. The way I look at it, I can be miserable or happy - the choice is mine, so why choose misery?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 December, 2015, 10:45:07 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 December, 2015, 10:11:14 PM
Thanks, chaps. The way I look at it, I can be miserable or happy - the choice is mine, so why choose misery?

A wise shark indeed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 December, 2015, 10:45:49 PM
Quote from: ZenArcade on 21 December, 2015, 09:56:25 PM
Good stuff there both of you lads. Z

Cheers z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 December, 2015, 09:29:20 AM
Great start to Boxing Day. Currently sitting in a broken down truck at the top of Parbold Hill in the pissing rain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 26 December, 2015, 12:43:31 PM
Jesus.  How did you manage that?  Me, I'm sleeping in my Dad's boat, stationed in his front driveway because the family home is full up.  Not actually any kind of impediment; it's actually warm and comfortable with a rudimentary toilet and even a gas stove; on which I'm about to make coffee.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 December, 2015, 01:17:38 PM
Sounds good, JBC. I'm wet through, cold, hungry and waiting for a tow truck. Two drivers have so far had a go at me in a "what the f*ck did you park there for, you dick-head" kind of way.
.
Sense of humour levels now at 80% and falling...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 December, 2015, 08:29:03 PM
Feck man, that's crap. When did you get out of there? Assuming you did?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 December, 2015, 08:38:15 PM
Finally got back to the yard about half three. Breakdown truck had to go all 'round the houses due to flooded roads. Never seen it so bad around here; the local canal's all over the tow path and the river's in a field. Nice and snug in my shed now, though :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 December, 2015, 09:49:32 PM
Most of Lancashire is not Atlancashire ('groan'), me and the family are putting up for friends from Radcliffe who got turfed out due to an overflowing embankment. Prity miserable time of year for it to happen, but it's nice to be able to talk to someone thats not family this christmas and they're a lovely bunch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 December, 2015, 10:14:39 PM
Good work, Hawkie - love to hear about people helping one another.
.
Also: Atlancasire - heh, love it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 27 December, 2015, 05:52:50 PM
My Christmas bonus from work will probably be spent on fixing the crown that was pulled from my tooth by a toffee from a box of Quality Streets that someone from work insisted I take home.
:-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 December, 2015, 05:58:46 PM
Tell me you work at a dental surgery and I'll cry "conspiracy!" Otherwise, ouch, sorry to hear that, Albie.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 27 December, 2015, 06:15:23 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 27 December, 2015, 05:58:46 PM
Tell me you work at a dental surgery and I'll cry "conspiracy!"

I do not.
I didn't even want to take them home as we had so many given to us at work I was kind of sick of them.
Anyway, take them home I did and after a couple of says I thought "I'll have one of those...", and then "What's this hard bit in the toffee?".  :-[
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 December, 2015, 06:20:01 PM
Seriously, sorry to hear that, Albie. I hope you can get it fixed sharpish - I bet there are hundreds of people with the same problem so dentists may be very busy at this time of year. I bet they even have have a special name for it - Christmas Tooth, maybe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Albion on 27 December, 2015, 06:53:49 PM
Thanks Sharky, I too am wondering how busy the dentist will be.
At least I have no pain....yet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 27 December, 2015, 07:12:07 PM
Hope it is fixed for you soon.   :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 27 December, 2015, 11:40:46 PM
My bridge (two front teeth) came out on  Xmas eve, so I'm all gap-toothed on the family Xmas photos this year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 December, 2015, 05:35:19 AM
Resisting the urge to quote the obvious, hope that doesn't hurt, DDD. Christmas time seems to be a dental holocaust.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 05 January, 2016, 01:07:57 PM
Because I'm going to restart my 2k sub but can't decide between physical and digital.

Most troubling.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 05 January, 2016, 09:42:41 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 05 January, 2016, 01:07:57 PMBecause I'm going to restart my 2k sub but can't decide between physical and digital.

Most troubling.

Welcome back to subbing (not that I currently sub, not directly from the Future Shop, anyway).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 05 January, 2016, 10:06:03 PM
 :D cheers Sheridan.  Looking forward to regular reading again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 06 January, 2016, 04:36:58 AM
I have been paying for a friends gym membership for a year and she is now changing gyms which means cancelling. We cancelled in November, and today I see they are once again taking another $50 from me! I went into the bank last month and they suggested that it was some kind of last fee as per the contract with the gym?? So she said if it happens again let them know. Sure enough, it's happened again. And now they are suggesting I put a claim in with the disputes people or whatever....

long story short, I've had enough and it's easier for me to close my bank account and open a new one elsewhere. It means messing around with getting my insurance, pay for work and other stuff changed, but on the plus side I'll be saving $50 a month.

In conclusion, don't ever EVER join L.A Fitness. Bunch of *****
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 January, 2016, 10:04:52 AM
gyms are notorious for that kind of chicanery
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 January, 2016, 11:15:26 AM
Why on Earth would you change your bank account rather than just cancelling the direct debit and/or getting your bank to treat it as a fraudulent transaction?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 January, 2016, 05:25:51 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 January, 2016, 11:15:26 AM
Why on Earth would you change your bank account rather than just cancelling the direct debit and/or getting your bank to treat it as a fraudulent transaction?
.
^^ This.
.
Seems like an awful lot of arsing about for a minor problem.
.
(Although my advice on this may be suspect as I flatly refuse to have a bank account...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 06 January, 2016, 05:49:26 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 January, 2016, 11:15:26 AM
Why on Earth would you change your bank account rather than just cancelling the direct debit and/or getting your bank to treat it as a fraudulent transaction?

I gave the bank a chance to fix it and there response was lets wait and see what happens. Costing me $50. Which I highly doubt I will be getting the full amount back. There is bound to be a fee for the fraud checking thing.

The bank told me it would all go away by now. It didn't. The bank lied to me. I think that is my irrational train of thought and now I have bank trust issues.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 January, 2016, 06:28:59 PM
All banks lie. If you really need a bank, better the devil you know.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 07 January, 2016, 11:50:45 AM
Commonplace with gyms but also ISPs and probably many others.
You cancel the DD ASAP and if they denied this earlier, you may be refunded. Refunds happen despite your demonisation of banks.

Also "richerthanyou" ?-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 07 January, 2016, 12:24:37 PM
Quote from: Fungus on 07 January, 2016, 11:50:45 AM


Also "richerthanyou" ?-)

I assumed it was a Harry Enfield reference:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8Kum8OUTuk

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 07 January, 2016, 04:27:15 PM
Clearly, I just found it nicely apt given the impediment...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 07 January, 2016, 08:01:19 PM
Wisdom from the Cosh droid. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 09 January, 2016, 12:39:15 PM
I was given a late gift of Game of Thrones series 1 blu ray. Turns out my player is too old and won't play the discs. Bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 09 January, 2016, 06:01:33 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 06 January, 2016, 06:28:59 PM
All banks lie. If you really need a bank, better the devil you know.

True that, though I did change this year to a U.K. Based building society after getting really fed up with the way hsbc go about things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 09 January, 2016, 06:27:26 PM
Might be worth going back and re-reading the small print, richerthanyou - the one time I signed up to a gym, it was stated that it took three months notice to cancel.
By that I mean, if It was a yearly contract, started on Jan 1st, you had to give them notice around October time for it to cancel in time. A friend of mind didn't - he assumed it ran out after the year, and that would be that. Rude awakening when he continued to have the money debited out of his account. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 January, 2016, 09:13:52 PM
It's not a contract unless it's signed by both parties, otherwise it's just an agreement. Agreements have less force than contracts and can be cancelled at any time. Most "contracts" these days are no such thing - they're simply agreements signed by one party.
.
Even if they were contracts, contracts contain two basic but essential requirements: they must be voluntary and contain reasonable expectations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 13 January, 2016, 09:42:40 PM
Some money was wedged into the front passenger, and I managed to reclaim all, but 50p, which dropped further into the seat. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 January, 2016, 12:09:00 AM
On Sunday I lay bruised on an icy back-road watching my Yamaha Majesty slide majestically away on its side with me no longer on it.   I had owned it for approximately 5 hours. 



(P.S.  Batman's Superior Cousin; I hope the front passenger gave you consent before you started unwedging that money.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 14 January, 2016, 02:01:01 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 14 January, 2016, 12:09:00 AM
On Sunday I lay bruised on an icy back-road watching my Yamaha Majesty slide majestically away on its side with me no longer on it.   I had owned it for approximately 5 hours. 



(P.S.  Batman's Superior Cousin; I hope the front passenger gave you consent before you started unwedging that money.)

Hope you're feeling better! I was about to say it's good you only suffered bruises (although a check up in case of cracked bones couldn't hurt. My arm/hand is still a bit dodgy from a fall a year back. I never went to the doctor as I was sure it was just bruised) but bad bruises can be pretty nasty all by themselves.

Yeah, and a different pain concerning that new bike. Ouch.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 14 January, 2016, 04:49:40 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 14 January, 2016, 02:01:01 AM
Hope you're feeling better! I was about to say it's good you only suffered bruises (although a check up in case of cracked bones couldn't hurt. My arm/hand is still a bit dodgy from a fall a year back. I never went to the doctor as I was sure it was just bruised) but bad bruises can be pretty nasty all by themselves.

Yeah, and a different pain concerning that new scooter. Ouch.

FTFY
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 January, 2016, 04:55:05 AM
Ouch, JBC. Glad you're okay, fella.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 14 January, 2016, 05:00:21 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 January, 2016, 04:55:05 AM
Ouch, JBC. Glad you're okay, fella.

Of course he is ok. Scooters don't go quick enough for you to get hurt on :D

Only joking! Yes our slower two wheeled brothers can get hurt just as much as the fast boys :) Glad you are ok and hope that nothing is too badly damaged.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 January, 2016, 08:18:16 AM
Thanks, guys, I'm absolutely fine - was more sore about the scooter than anything else! It's far from new; 2003 in fact, but it was in remarkably good shape till I got my hands on it.  Still, all damage is superficial, so I can't complain - things could have been much, much worse.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 January, 2016, 08:50:55 AM
Must be those Jedi reflexes!

I had a Fizzy when I left school. It kept melting spark plugs. Pushed the damned thing more miles than I ever rode it. The final straw came when I saw my mates scrambling their bikes on the Cop (a local field containing the remains of an old sea wall) and decided to join them. Unfortunately, the flattened grass I took for the entrance to the field wasn't and I ended up upside down in a ditch with petrol dribbling out the tank all down my shirt. Everyone laughed. One of them said, "hey look, Mark's coming!" When they looked, though, there was nobody there. It took a moment for one of them to spot a wheel going round in the long grass, then they all came over to help me out - which took ages due to laughter.

Been four wheels, minimum, for me ever since.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 January, 2016, 10:23:19 AM
Glad you walked away, Jayzus. Yeah, seems like it's only a matter of time before everyone takes a spill on a scooter. I have the fondest memories of them too - the future-missus and I squashed onto a Honda 90 puttering around the lanes of Sligo, draping our drying towels on a Kymco Dink on a cliff top on Kos, or heading home over the spine of Amorgos in the pitch black with only a reading torch held in my mouth for light.... Somehow forgetting the scrapes, cracked ribs, broken fingers and borderline frostbite.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 January, 2016, 02:25:42 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 14 January, 2016, 10:23:19 AM
Glad you walked away, Jayzus. Yeah, seems like it's only a matter of time before everyone takes a spill on a scooter. I have the fondest memories of them too - the future-missus and I squashed onto a Honda 90 puttering around the lanes of Sligo, draping our drying towels on a Kymco Dink on a cliff top on Kos, or heading home over the spine of Amorgos in the pitch black with only a reading torch held in my mouth for light.... Somehow forgetting the scrapes, cracked ribs, broken fingers and borderline frostbite.

That genuinely does sound like a great trip.  I intend to make a few similar ones this year as soon as the weather improves.  It's not the first time I've fallen off a scooter - about the fourth, iirc. I had a 50cc Hyosung for years; I loved it but now I'm on a 250cc (which I'm sure is a pussy's bike if you're a proper biker, but for me it feels like a beast) I'll never go back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 14 January, 2016, 05:21:11 PM
Sorry to hear about the Lawmaster JBC,  but the main thing's you're Ok. You'll be back on the Superslab in no time.Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 January, 2016, 06:19:40 PM
Glad you are ok. Engine size doesn't make you a brother, it's the number of wheels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 14 January, 2016, 08:25:38 PM
Lawmaster...

That tickled me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 14 January, 2016, 09:00:53 PM
Glad you are ok Jayzus.  Must admit I went off bikes after a nasty knock when I was young, got flattened by a car going through a red and never felt safe on them again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 January, 2016, 10:31:23 PM
Thanks, guys; really wasn't a serious fall at all; all that was really damaged was my dignity and some plastic.

Lawmaster...  :)

Only in the Gaia Conspiracy sense of the word...


(http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff248/burlearth/2000AD038.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 14 January, 2016, 10:41:33 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 14 January, 2016, 10:44:24 PM
Glad to hear you are OK J, A spill off any two wheeler is always unpleasant. 250cc though that's a fair bit of a scooter.  I know a guy in Galway that has a Vespa and make the trip from Galway to the Isle of Wight nearly every year. Nice spin!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 14 January, 2016, 11:41:18 PM
Getting fatter as you get older.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 15 January, 2016, 08:01:29 AM
Quote from: maryanddavid on 14 January, 2016, 10:44:24 PM
Glad to hear you are OK J, A spill off any two wheeler is always unpleasant. 250cc though that's a fair bit of a scooter.  I know a guy in Galway that has a Vespa and make the trip from Galway to the Isle of Wight nearly every year. Nice spin!

Thanks, David! That does indeed sound like a nice trip; might do it myself some day!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 January, 2016, 03:19:32 PM
Stuck at unscheduled Saturday work JUST long enough to miss the third family outing to Force Awakens. Bit longer and I'd have been able to charge enough to make it worthwhile, bit shorter and I'd have made it to the film. Bah and double bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 16 January, 2016, 03:23:11 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 16 January, 2016, 03:19:32 PM
Stuck at unscheduled Saturday work JUST long enough to miss the third family outing to Force Awakens. Bit longer and I'd have been able to charge enough to make it worthwhile, bit shorter and I'd have made it to the film. Bah and double bah.

There is always the DVD and you missed screaming kids,moaning unhappy teens and exasperated adults who had to shell out a small fortune for this must see family experience.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 16 January, 2016, 10:00:05 PM
I really want to see that again.

I am signed off at the moment which does afford some time to do it but I'm signed off for my eyes meaning I can't easily travel to see it and can't see it well anyway (I've only seen it with one eye thus far).

I shall have to await the Blue Ray I think.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 16 January, 2016, 11:50:32 PM
The C.E.O of our parent company came around for a visit the other day. And he was reading something that I had written (not knowing it was me who did it) earlier in the month. And then he came out with "perhaps someone should have proof read this first"

How did 500+ people not notice this and tell me sooner?? Out of everything he could have looked at, he reads the one thing I did with a single spelling mistake and notices it!

So much for a bonus then
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 January, 2016, 07:38:24 AM
Fault of whoever should have proofread it, not you - no-one can effectively proof their own work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 17 January, 2016, 11:29:50 AM
Planning a trip soon-ish to that there London.

Now with the dates that we can make, it'll mean either; Missing the Cosmonauts exhibition (Science Museum), but catching Bagpuss and the Clangers (V&A), or catching the Cosmonauts, but missing Bagpuss.....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 January, 2016, 11:36:36 AM
Heh, such are the problems in the overdeveloped world!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 17 January, 2016, 01:34:16 PM
Quote from: richerthanyou on 16 January, 2016, 11:50:32 PM
The C.E.O of our parent company came around for a visit the other day. And he was reading something that I had written (not knowing it was me who did it) earlier in the month. And then he came out with "perhaps someone should have proof read this first"

How did 500+ people not notice this and tell me sooner?? Out of everything he could have looked at, he reads the one thing I did with a single spelling mistake and notices it!

So much for a bonus then

Did he need to say it like that though?  Does not come across well there at all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 January, 2016, 02:12:57 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 17 January, 2016, 01:34:16 PM
Did he need to say it like that though?  Does not come across well there at all.

Some management types just need to be seen saying something negative in public to demonstrate their innate superiority over their minions, little realising that what it actually illustrates are poor quality control systems that they themselves are responsible for.  We've all worked with them. Some of us even are them.

As an aside, one of my most bittersweet memories is presenting my father with my just-submitted  postgrad thesis, which had taken me three endless years of expense, sweat and latterly torment, all nicely bound in two black leather volumes with gold lettering and all that balls.  He opened it at a random page, scanned a single paragraph and said: "well you'll need to change this: there's a typo right there".


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 17 January, 2016, 05:15:18 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 17 January, 2016, 11:36:36 AM
Heh, such are the problems in the overdeveloped world!

I know!
Someone ought to tell all those trying to get into Western Europe that it's not all fun and games here..  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 17 January, 2016, 05:41:55 PM
Was away with dive friends last night, came home to find no one had closed the guinea pigs hutch (they have free roam of the garden). Found one of the poor sods frozen solid down the side of the green house. Cried quite a bit about it TBH, they wheren't even mine really but I fed them and looked after them for 5 years. I feel like I should have locked them up before going out.  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 January, 2016, 06:19:26 PM
Ah man, that's crappy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 17 January, 2016, 10:33:48 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 17 January, 2016, 06:19:26 PM
Ah man, that's crappy.
Well, yeah.

Having since inspected the corpse, he was decapitated. Chances are a cat caught him down their early hours and acted instinctivly, as none of him was consumed. As it was, it was probably very quick. Small mercy, I guess. Poor bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 17 January, 2016, 11:29:53 PM
 :'( Poor pig.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 18 January, 2016, 04:42:31 AM
5 weeks til unemployment

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 18 January, 2016, 05:29:53 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 17 January, 2016, 02:12:57 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 17 January, 2016, 01:34:16 PM
Did he need to say it like that though?  Does not come across well there at all.

Some management types just need to be seen saying something negative in public to demonstrate their innate superiority over their minions, little realising that what it actually illustrates are poor quality control systems that they themselves are responsible for.  We've all worked with them. Some of us even are them.

As an aside, one of my most bittersweet memories is presenting my father with my just-submitted  postgrad thesis, which had taken me three endless years of expense, sweat and latterly torment, all nicely bound in two black leather volumes with gold lettering and all that balls.  He opened it at a random page, scanned a single paragraph and said: "well you'll need to change this: there's a typo right there".

:lol:


True what you say there Tordels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 18 January, 2016, 08:55:22 PM
I noticed in Asda that I was having trouble reading the ingredients label on some soup...time for an eye test ,I feel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 18 January, 2016, 10:12:06 PM
I'm short-sighted, so I can read without glasses just fine, but things blur in the distance .  Well okay that's true for most people, but I mean it blurs much closer... meaning I wear my glasses most of the time.

I can actually read okay with my glasses on too, although I don't need them then, but when you wear them most of the time you forget you're actually wearing them.

However, I have noticed recently (well the last year or two, anyway) that for very small text I need to remove the glasses to focus. I'm not sure if this is a new thing due to a change in eyesight. Or if it's always been the case, and I just didn't notice as my it's only been the last few years that I've needed to read tiny text. Namely the model numbers in the battery compartments of mobile phones. ;)  (I'm not doing anything dodgy, but I won't bore you with the details, since this post is probably boring enough.)

I do need an eye test too. Not that I've noticed much difference. It's just been years since I had one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 19 January, 2016, 12:06:49 AM
Rude to ask, but how old are you Mardroid?
If you're 45 plus it's just normal age related presbyopia.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 January, 2016, 08:55:13 AM
Quote from: Link Prime on 19 January, 2016, 12:06:49 AM
If you're 45 plus it's just normal age related presbyopia.

Yup. Comes to us all. As you age, the lens of the eye loses flexibility and with it your ability to adjust focus to near distances is diminished.

Opticians are conditioned to sell you varifocals, but these require you to learn to move your eyes to look down at small text and near objects, which might not be suitable for you. They aren't appropriate for me, because my near work is at a drawing board, so the glance-downwards-for-near-correction thing doesn't work. When you have your eyes tested, be very clear that you're doing close work and might be better served with a separate pair of reading glasses.

(If you do decide to try varifocals, be aware that a small percentage of punters can never adapt to varis. Any optician worth their salt will have an extended return/refund period to give you a risk-free opportunity to try and get used to them. The ones I used to work for did a 60-day return period on varifocals for that reason.)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 January, 2016, 10:15:09 AM
Whilst they aren't a panacea, eye exercises (http://m.wikihow.com/Exercise-Your-Eyes) can help keep your eyes in good nick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 January, 2016, 10:15:27 AM
Deleted dp. (Couldn't see which buttons I was pressing...? *chortles*)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 19 January, 2016, 10:41:00 AM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 18 January, 2016, 08:55:22 PM
I noticed in Asda that I was having trouble reading the ingredients label on some soup...time for an eye test ,I feel.

To be fair you were trying from the edge of the car park.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 19 January, 2016, 11:02:19 AM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 19 January, 2016, 10:41:00 AM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 18 January, 2016, 08:55:22 PM
I noticed in Asda that I was having trouble reading the ingredients label on some soup...time for an eye test ,I feel.

To be fair you were trying from the edge of the car park.
Oh blaze, you comedian you!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 19 January, 2016, 11:11:56 AM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 19 January, 2016, 08:55:13 AM

Any optician worth their salt will have an extended return/refund period to give you a risk-free opportunity to try and get used to them. The ones I used to work for did a 60-day return period on varifocals for that reason.


Seems we may have taken a similar career path at some stage Jim.
How long were you working in practice?

I've been working for a large and well known lens manufacturer for the guts of 20 years, but only spent less than 2 working in practice part-time (while training as a D.O.)
Dealing with the general public was...an experience  :-\

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 19 January, 2016, 11:38:10 AM
Quote from: Link Prime on 19 January, 2016, 12:06:49 AM
Rude to ask, but how old are you Mardroid?
If you're 45 plus it's just normal age related presbyopia.

I think* I'm 41 in March. So that could be the issue.

I don't need reading glasses though,.that's for sure. I can make out text very well without glasses, being short sighted. Although I might need to bring it a bit closer to my face. Heh.) Its just that I used to be able to see text well with my long distance glasses on (and I still can for the most part. I'm wearing them right now typing this on a phone). It's the really tiny text, like you'd read in prescriptions for which the glasses would need to come off.

*I'm not joking there. I'm at that age where Im not entirely sure. I'm 40 or 41 now anyway.

Edit. Yes of course I'm 40. I was born in March 1975 and its 2016 yet, so 41 isn't far off. What  dumbo, I had to work that out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 January, 2016, 11:39:50 AM
Quote from: Link Prime on 19 January, 2016, 11:11:56 AM
Seems we may have taken a similar career path at some stage Jim.
How long were you working in practice?

I was never directly on the professional side, I was the Customer Service Manager for $WELLKNOWNHIGHSTREETOPTICIAN which necessitated a fairly solid grasp of both the 1989 Opticians Act (and subsequent amendments) and the 1979 Sales of Goods Act.

Amongst other things, our department was the public-facing part of all professional service complaints and one of my jobs was taking the responses from the professional service teams and translating them into comprehensible English without losing the technical exactness or exposing the company to legal liability. This meant a lot of conversations with DOs and OOs!

Cheers

Jim

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 January, 2016, 11:43:52 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 19 January, 2016, 11:38:10 AM
I don't need reading glasses though,.that's for sure.

Reading glasses is a bit of a misnomer, but is used because that's what they're mostly used for. Really, they're just a different prescription for focussing on close things to the one you need for focussing on distant things, because of the loss of lens flexibility described above. Because presbyopia is effectively a tendency towards long sight, there can actually be a period where your eye sight improves if you're short-sighted to begin with.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 January, 2016, 12:21:43 PM
yeah, my eyes were fine till my early 40s - then it was reading glasses, 2 yrs later stronger readers, 2 yrs after that I tried varifiocals but took them back because I couldn't get on with them (found I was always looking through the wrong bit and swivelling my head around like a loon) and replaced with more readers, but 2 yrs after that I was just getting so sick of whipping my specs on and off a million times a day (and my middle distance was deteriorating too) so I tried varis again and persisted with them. Didn't actually take too long to get used to them and now I wear them all the time and I CAN SEE STUFF!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 19 January, 2016, 12:24:12 PM
I have to clear majority of my house for building work and have SERIOUSLY underestimated how many comics I have up the loft. I thought I could hide them in the eaves until I looked and found it half filled with comic boxes I'd forgot all about. Bollocks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 19 January, 2016, 03:54:12 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 18 January, 2016, 08:55:22 PM
I noticed in Asda that I was having trouble reading the ingredients label on some soup...time for an eye test ,I feel.

been putting that off for over a year now...time to get on with it methinks  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 19 January, 2016, 04:52:03 PM
I'm one of those people whose eyesight has got better over 40 as my sight gets longer again. My glasses aren't so strong now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Darren Stephens on 19 January, 2016, 04:56:38 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 19 January, 2016, 03:54:12 PM
Quote from: Darren Stephens on 18 January, 2016, 08:55:22 PM
I noticed in Asda that I was having trouble reading the ingredients label on some soup...time for an eye test ,I feel.

been putting that off for over a year now...time to get on with it methinks  :(

Yeh, going to have to get my act together and book myself in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 19 January, 2016, 05:30:17 PM
Ahh, so there is a few of us.
Yes, I've joined the ranks of people having to take off their glasses to read small print now.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 19 January, 2016, 05:33:46 PM
It's just a pain when you have to take your contacts out.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 19 January, 2016, 06:40:41 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 19 January, 2016, 11:39:50 AM
I was the Customer Service Manager for $WELLKNOWNHIGHSTREETOPTICIAN

Ha, that's gas- no doubt I was working for the same entity (naturally a ROI branch). Small world.

Mardroid, Spikes, Grugz & Darren- off ye get to your local optician for a check up.
No point sticking your head in the sand!  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 21 January, 2016, 08:47:57 AM
Bus drivers who pull up to bus stop.ahead of you, when you're running late, hang around for a few seconds after the passengers have disembarked, making you think, "That's nice! He saw me runing and decided to wait for me!" then close the doors just as you arive and pull away.

I'm not saying he did the whole hanging around thing intentionally for that reason (his was the second of 2 buses to arive almost  together so he might have waited to synch his own schedule) but he must have seen me waving my hand at the door.

On the plus side, the next bus (11 minutes later) was on time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 21 January, 2016, 01:05:08 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 21 January, 2016, 08:47:57 AM
Bus drivers who pull up to bus stop.ahead of you, when you're running late, hang around for a few seconds after the passengers have disembarked, making you think, "That's nice! He saw me runing and decided to wait for me!" then close the doors just as you arive and pull away.
Bus drivers in general!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 January, 2016, 03:08:50 PM
Bus driving in the city is is a tough gig, I don't envy 'em. However, my tram line wasn't working the other night (1-2 times a week, absurd), so we were told our tickets would valid on the bus and off I toddled... Alas, no-one had told the bus driver, and he wasn't going to pick up the rsdio and ask, and instead proceeded to argue with a dozen passengers in a row across three successive city centre stops, each time as if it was the first. Or as if we were all part of a giant fare-dodging conspiracy? Okay, see I, he's a stickler, and as a Dredd fan I suppose I should respect that. But when we eventually got to my stop, outside a petrol station on a windy rural road, he got off the bus, ran into the shop and bought himself a coffee.  Pretty sure that's not in the Comportment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 January, 2016, 04:23:10 PM
A pcv driver should never leave his vehicle with passengers still aboard, except in an emergency. Basic Rule, that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 21 January, 2016, 08:00:39 PM
An article in The Guardian about bus services today:

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/jan/21/why-nobody-complaining-bus-services-deregulation (http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/jan/21/why-nobody-complaining-bus-services-deregulation)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 January, 2016, 08:19:51 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 January, 2016, 04:23:10 PM
A pcv driver should never leave his vehicle with passengers still aboard, except in an emergency. Basic Rule, that.

That was my understanding too. And this was a double decker bus with numerous passengers parked on the side of a busy unlit rural road at 8pm, just past the entrance to a petrol station. I was a little taken aback.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 January, 2016, 08:33:23 PM
That really isn't on. It's dangerous - especially if the driver left the engine running. When I drove coaches, I actually saw an unmanned bus left with the engine running slip itself into gear and trundle out of the yard and across a busy main road, where it hit a wall and stalled, blocking the traffic. Luckily, nobody was hurt and there was no damage to anything except the bus and the driver's career.

I don't usually advocate reporting people but in this case I would make an exception. Imagine what could have happened if that bus had lurched off on its own. The first thing I learned about being a psv driver (as it was called in those days) is that your Primary Responsibility is the Safety and Comfort of your passengers. Period. All other priorities are secondary.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 26 January, 2016, 12:28:52 PM
It's 23 degrees C. 86% humidity. 3kmh winds.

Sounds nice yes? Except it's 1:24 in the morning. I have work in a few hours. And due to not having A/C I haven't slept a wink. Oh and it's 23 outside. You can add a few more on inside. Ive got all the windows and doors open not that there is much point since there is NO BLOODY WIND!

I had an ice cream half an hour ago to try and cool down. I did contemplate sleeping outside but there is nowhere to sleep out there really. And I'm sure the mosquitoes would have a ball.

I'm sure there are some freezing people out there who would love to swap. Be. My. Guest. This sucks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 02 February, 2016, 09:23:42 AM
nah you're all right. I prefer freezing. *hugs duvet*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 03 February, 2016, 06:13:15 PM
I CAN READ!!!  no eye test as yet but I tried some of those £1.99 reading glasses from home bargains and now I can see the tiny print on my fallout 4 guide and can catch up on my megazines as I gave up before Christmas...

I can also look disapprovingly over the tops of them at my daughter when shes being cheeky. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 03 February, 2016, 06:22:09 PM
It's all 'looking' up then Grugz. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 February, 2016, 06:27:16 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 03 February, 2016, 06:13:15 PM
I can also look disapprovingly over the tops of them at my daughter when shes being cheeky. ;)

When I had to start wearing readers this was one of the few big plus points. It's a scientifically proven fact that wearing glasses makes you look cleverer - this is amplified 100% by looking over the top of them because it suggests "I'm talking to you, but I'm still reading at the same time because I'm just so damn smart"

wearing them on a little chain however negates this effect and makes you look like a camp pensioner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 03 February, 2016, 06:31:41 PM
The multiple clicks of assorted squaxx chains landing in the bin. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 February, 2016, 07:02:31 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 03 February, 2016, 06:27:16 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 03 February, 2016, 06:13:15 PM
I can also look disapprovingly over the tops of them at my daughter when shes being cheeky. ;)
When I had to start wearing readers this was one of the few big plus points. It's a scientifically proven fact that wearing glasses makes you look cleverer - this is amplified 100% by looking over the top of them because it suggests "I'm talking to you, but I'm still reading at the same time because I'm just so damn smart"

wearing them on a little chain however negates this effect and makes you look like a camp pensioner.
Depends how many links, surely!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 03 February, 2016, 07:42:40 PM
Went to the dentist. I have to have my wisdom teeth pulled. Drok.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 February, 2016, 08:41:26 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 03 February, 2016, 07:42:40 PM
Went to the dentist. I have to have my wisdom teeth pulled. Drok.

Sympathise - tis about to happen to me. In a very big surgical type situation. MY DOK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 03 February, 2016, 08:49:19 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 February, 2016, 08:41:26 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 03 February, 2016, 07:42:40 PM
Went to the dentist. I have to have my wisdom teeth pulled. Drok.

Sympathise - tis about to happen to me. In a very big surgical type situation. MY DOK.

Well, at least the x-rays show the roots are well aligned. The dentist feels they should slide out fairly easily. Easy for him.  :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 February, 2016, 08:50:50 PM
Quote from: CrazyFoxMachine on 03 February, 2016, 08:41:26 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 03 February, 2016, 07:42:40 PM
Went to the dentist. I have to have my wisdom teeth pulled. Drok.

Sympathise - tis about to happen to me. In a very big surgical type situation. MY DOK.

Sympathize too - had mine done years ago. Awoke with two bruises - one on my forehead (hand-shaped) and one on my chest (knee-shaped)... I'm sure it's more scientific these days, though. Probably.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 February, 2016, 05:06:07 PM
I make 12-14 journeys on this tram a week. At least twice a week someone sits beside me who has apparently shat themselves, puked on themselves or not washed for a couple of months.  And that's not counting the folk that reek of booze, gas, solvent or that wonderful sour heroin smell.

Right now I'm in danger of vomitting myself, as the gent beside me appears to have been eating particularly noxious catshit, and keeps picking at his teeth and heavily exhaling in my direction.  I've never smelled anything like it, and I dig cesspits for living and use building site toilets. Two rows down there's a junkie with a puppy loudly threatening to murder the next person who looks at him, so I'm not keen on drawing attention to myself by forcing my way down the carriage.

One in six journeys seems a little frequent for this kind of thing, even for a line that links two major hospitals, several courts, and runs from the inner city to some ofvtoughest parts of the Western suburbs (Cheeverstown I'm looking at you).

Add to that the line closed by at least one signal failure or RTA a week, and at least one violent incident,  and I do wonder what the heck is going on.





Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 04 February, 2016, 05:23:45 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 04 February, 2016, 05:06:07 PM
Add to that the line closed by at least one signal failure or RTA a week, and at least one violent incident,  and I do wonder what the heck is going on.
The start of Block Mania by the sounds of it!

I'm with Stephen Fry block, by the way. You?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 04 February, 2016, 05:58:12 PM
Manchester's trams are quite expensive so we don't get too many of the tramp/junkie demographic - ticket checking is variable though. I once worked out that if I had not bought any tickets for my daily commute over the last year, the number of times I would've been caught and fined £100 would still have worked out cheaper than my season ticket.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 February, 2016, 06:41:15 PM
The Smell has followed me home, I keep catching whiffs of it, so I'm faced with the possibility that (a) I'm losing my very last marble; (b) it's permeated my clothes; (C) it was me all along. I can't decide which is worse.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 07:16:23 PM
Because after nearly 30 years since I first started training for it I've had to jack in my career in computing.  My eyes are just too fucked and hurting all the time and have gone downhill very badly since my last surgery in 08.

I had planned to get to November when my contract ends so I could then have claimed jsa whilst I figure out what's next. Sadly I can't get there though so won't b able to claim a penny and have no idea what's coming next.

Might be skint for a while but being ill just isn't worth it.

So yeah, bit shitty but hopefully I will figure out a way forward.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 04 February, 2016, 07:29:25 PM
That truly is a rough situation, Fishy. I'm sure you'll find other ways you can use your skills and experience, but you still have my sympathies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 04 February, 2016, 07:29:51 PM
That is shitty Fishy. I hope you find something soon. Something you enjoy hopefully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 07:32:02 PM
Thank you Von Boom.

I hope so.  There is always that worry that I might ever work again or something but I am hoping I will.

I really wanted my son to be the other side of uni before this happened as it means I won't be able to help him much but sadly my health had other ideas.  At least he's 18 this year so I've managed nearly through to him being adult.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 04 February, 2016, 08:30:20 PM
I'm sure he'll understand. My parents couldn't help me with uni, but I managed to get through.

I have no doubt he'd rather see you well and pain free and not worrying about him. Hopefully things will work out for your whole family.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 04 February, 2016, 09:11:22 PM
Can you not claim ESA, Fishy?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 February, 2016, 09:33:32 PM
That sucks, Fishy. So sorry to hear it. Don't despair, though - there's always something. Maybe you could teach computers to the partially sighted or something - no, this is not meant to be facetious. When life gives you lemons and all that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 09:59:33 PM
Thanks Von, I hope so.  He's a bright and nice chap so I think so.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 10:01:14 PM
Not yet tankie sadly.  My fusion has gone within 100 cm in all directions and to the sides in all directions and just seeing is agony.  Because I have fusion directly in front though beyond 100cm it's not yet a full disability.  It will be a functional disability in a couple of years.

The problem I have is it is horribly painful right now, so I have to stop now. But sadly I can't get help.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 10:02:46 PM
Thanks sharkie.  You make a good point, something in teaching is exactly what I am hoping to do.  I do have a PGCE I'm not using it teacher would be too much so I am hoping some sort of learning support role might be possible.  I will be volunteering in a local school to try it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 04 February, 2016, 10:17:02 PM
Aw man, sorry to hear that, Fishy. I have a mate in a similar predicament; he's agonising over whether to get potentially damaging surgery or not. Hope things work out for you anyway
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 10:26:46 PM
Cheers jayzus.  I had it three times, it came back every time anyway.  With bearing in mind.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 February, 2016, 10:27:23 PM
"Worth" even  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 February, 2016, 07:35:07 AM
Sorry to hear the operations were unsuccessful.  In my mate's case, he'll definitely go blind eventually without them, but the operation could make him instantly blind if it goes wrong.  It's a tough call; I think he's putting it off till he really, really needs it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 09 February, 2016, 08:56:36 PM
Ah yeah. Worth the risk then.

In fairness mine would have led to functional blindness far sooner without them, it's just a lot of pain but I wouldn't have kept going unti now without it.  So yeah mine had that same risk but it was worth it really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 10 February, 2016, 10:11:48 AM
That sounds awful Fishy. You have my sympathies.

Don't worry about your boy - I also had no financial help as my dad had just died and they wouldn't have been able to afford it anyway even if he didn't but I still got through the end with a good mark. University is all about learning to stand on your own two feet anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 10 February, 2016, 04:34:00 PM
Thanks staticgirl.  I appreciate that.

Yeah thank you, it's good to here of people who got through without it.  Myself and my sister did too, mum very poor and dad very absent and as tight as they come but more help was available back then so I had nothing like the loans he will have (though it's more like a tax than a direct loan these days I guess).

I'm sure he will be ok and if he gets the grades he's capable of he could also apply for scholarships. 

I just had a real hope I could last long enough to be able to help.  I feel sad really. I m glad though that I've been able to give him a comfortable life up until half way through his 18th year. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 February, 2016, 05:00:38 PM
Come on, Fishy - you can still help. You talk like the game's over; it ain't. The rules have changed, that's all. You're a smart and devoted guy, you'll figure it out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 10 February, 2016, 05:32:18 PM
Thanks sharky.  Not so much financially anymore unless I can find a new line of work within my limitations.

But I can definitely help him in other ways.

And I've given him 18 years, which is 18 years more than mine gave me so that something  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 12 February, 2016, 03:36:02 PM
18 was traditionally when parents withdrew their financial support in the old days.

Yes your support may not be financial but your emotional support is far more important. I've only just finished paying for my studies in my mid 40s but it's knowing my mum would be there for me with love and advice that got me through it. I learned so much and whilst I was grieving for my dad I did enjoy my studies tremendously and they have continued to be useful. In fact I am doing some post grad qualifications whilst I work at the moment and highly enjoying a second crack at being a student, albeit part time. It reminds me what I loved about university.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 12 February, 2016, 10:59:17 PM
Yes that is so true.  I got that from my mum, she could never do much financially but gave so much emotional support.  I'll always be there for my boy too.

Studying again sounds lovely, it's something I'm seriously looking at now I'm stopping working and whilst I still have something left in the eyes.  Like you I loved education.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 16 February, 2016, 04:50:35 AM
I have 4 days to find somewhere to live. The place I was looking at fell through.

Starting to panic now...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 16 February, 2016, 08:29:19 AM
Quote from: richerthanyou on 16 February, 2016, 04:50:35 AM
I have 4 days to find somewhere to live. The place I was looking at fell through.

Starting to panic now...

Sorry to hear that. Don't panic though, that won't help you think straight.

I don't think people can just throw you out, anyway. You have rights.
Have you done the usual things? Registered on Council Waiting list and with housing associations, etc? (Granted they might take time to come through?)
I'm sure someone with better knowledge and experience than me on here can advise you better. It might be a good idea to contact  Citizens Advice Bureau (https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk) to discuss your situation. They can at least aim you in the right direction.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 February, 2016, 08:37:05 AM
Quote from: Mardroid on 16 February, 2016, 08:29:19 AM


I don't think people can just throw you out, anyway. You have rights.


In theory, yes. In practice, no.

Can you ask your landlord for an extension while you find another place? Even if he/she says no, they'll still need to get a court order to evict you, which will give you another few weeks at least while the rigmarole is gone through.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 February, 2016, 09:21:52 AM
Not sure what jurisdiction you're in RTY, but there's bound to be an organisation that handles housing rights (Threshold in the RoI) even if it's just Citizen's Advice. Like Mardroid says, don't panic, see what they can do for you about finding somewhere temporary or extending your current stay, and maybe talk to your landlord about it: maybe they even know of other suitable properties. Best not to fall out with your landlord if you can avoid it, or lack of references could make finding somewhere new even harder.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 16 February, 2016, 09:41:41 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 12 February, 2016, 03:36:02 PMIn fact I am doing some post grad qualifications whilst I work at the moment and highly enjoying a second crack at being a student, albeit part time.

It'll get you nowhere that attitude. Education is only about employment you know! As an aside, I was a full time student once and I by and large hated virtually every moment of it. I'm vaguely jealous of people who had enjoyable experiences of it!

On a not unrelated note, I still have no permanent employment, though thankfully got a short contract thing that saw me over the end of last year to now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 17 February, 2016, 09:31:59 AM
Just got my BCD and reg's back in from servicing. £110! Jeeeeesus! :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 February, 2016, 04:00:42 PM
So, it turns out that when a solicitor says "no win, no fee" he actually means "so long as I don't have to do anything and the opposition folds instantly without my having to lift a finger or make any 'phone calls or write any letters, no fee." A solicitor being misleading - who'd have believed it possible?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 18 February, 2016, 04:02:05 PM
It's that old joke all over again:

How do you tell if a solicitor is lying? His lips are moving.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 18 February, 2016, 04:15:24 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 04 February, 2016, 05:06:07 PM
I make 12-14 journeys on this tram a week. At least twice a week someone sits beside me who has apparently shat themselves, puked on themselves or not washed for a couple of months.  And that's not counting the folk that reek of booze, gas, solvent or that wonderful sour heroin smell.

Right now I'm in danger of vomitting myself, as the gent beside me appears to have been eating particularly noxious catshit, and keeps picking at his teeth and heavily exhaling in my direction.  I've never smelled anything like it, and I dig cesspits for living and use building site toilets. Two rows down there's a junkie with a puppy loudly threatening to murder the next person who looks at him, so I'm not keen on drawing attention to myself by forcing my way down the carriage.

One in six journeys seems a little frequent for this kind of thing, even for a line that links two major hospitals, several courts, and runs from the inner city to some ofvtoughest parts of the Western suburbs (Cheeverstown I'm looking at you).

Add to that the line closed by at least one signal failure or RTA a week, and at least one violent incident,  and I do wonder what the heck is going on.

How is the job at the Dublin Tourist Office going by the way?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 February, 2016, 05:46:51 PM
Heh!  Well I'm paying for dissing the tram now, as the bloody thing is on strike, and I've now been sitting on a packed bus for 1.5hrs and I'm nowhere near home yet. Come back catshit man, all is forgiven!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 18 February, 2016, 05:51:36 PM
Isn't it amazing how much you'll put up with in a really shitty service when the alternative is even shittier.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 19 February, 2016, 07:11:40 AM
I'm unemployed! Yay!

In all seriousness I start my new like as a student next week. I still have no confirmed housing. And luckily for me, for the last time possibly ever I am drunk.

Who will survive and what will be left of them? Wait, wasn't that the tag line to Texas Chainsaw Massacre? I believe it was. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Anyway. I'm sure that everything will work out fine. I've survived for this long. Do I understand this thing called life? No way. Do I expect to work it out eventually? Perhaps.

Anyway, time for some more drink to get me through the evening. To those who like me, thank you for listening. For those who don't, maybe one day you will.

Peace
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 19 February, 2016, 11:28:06 AM
Best of luck with your studies. (I kind of see an analogy with the elaborate scenario you posted in the Creative Common section.)

Have to ask though, didn't you tell us a few weeks ago you were drunk for the last time ever?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 February, 2016, 11:38:13 AM
Maybe it's the same drunk and he hasn't sobered up yet...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2016, 12:35:18 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 19 February, 2016, 11:28:06 AM
... didn't you tell us a few weeks ago you were drunk for the last time ever?

Indeed! And no-one has ever made such an erroneous claim before. Certainly not I.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 19 February, 2016, 05:54:58 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 19 February, 2016, 11:28:06 AM
Have to ask though, didn't you tell us a few weeks ago you were drunk for the last time ever?

This might sound a little mad, but I didn't actually plan on getting drunk. Rather all the people I know from and through work insisted on buying me drinks, and (un)fortunately for me I seem to be quite the popular guy in these parts. The drinks kept coming, I kept saying no I have to go soon. And somehow I ended up quite drunk, back home and posting some strange stuff here on the boards!

If you had read the small print on the last time I was drunk (which didn't exist until exactly right this very moment) it would have said this is the last time ever being drunk *on my own money

And since last nights shenanigans cost me all of $0.00 (even getting home was free) I saw an opportunity and I took it.

And now, since I'm a poor student, and all of my new friends in my new city will all be poor students, the chances of other people getting me drunk is exactly nil. Which is why I can safely say that last night was the last time I will ever be drunk again (until the next time)

And now to pack all of my things. While hung over.

Great.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 19 February, 2016, 07:51:54 PM
As of Monday I will also be unemployed and my career in computing will have ended.

Thankfully I do have somewhere to live.  Going to take a career break and then look to the future.

For now though a beer seems a good idea.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 19 February, 2016, 07:55:50 PM
Remiss of me.. I totally forgot to say good luck Richer!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2016, 08:10:31 PM
All the best for the future, Fishy.  Hell of a big life change to cope with, but I'm sure you'll meet the challenge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 February, 2016, 08:20:38 PM
Aye, all the best Fishy and Richy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 19 February, 2016, 08:28:33 PM
Thank you Tordels and the Shark, I appreciate it  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 19 February, 2016, 08:44:59 PM
Hope everything works out for both of you richer and Fishy(er).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 19 February, 2016, 09:01:14 PM
Tordels & The Shark sounds like an American telly programme from the 1980s about a pair of comically mismatched private investigators with wildly differing methods, forced to work together, initially due to reasons outwith their control, but they grudgingly develop a mutual respect for each other over the course of the series, which is probably set in San Francisco.

..and good luck, whoever needs it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 19 February, 2016, 09:07:24 PM
Best of luck, Fishy.  Hope it all goes well
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2016, 10:04:07 PM
Aw no Chief,  don't partner me with the Shark! Everyone knows he's a loose cannon who plays by his own rules, and I'm only 30 years away from retirement.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 February, 2016, 10:10:50 PM
Yeah, Chief - only partners I need are my cool car, my big gun and my mysterious inner torment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 19 February, 2016, 10:44:31 PM
Quote from: M.I.K. on 19 February, 2016, 09:01:14 PM
Tordels & The Shark sounds like an American telly programme from the 1980s about a pair of comically mismatched private investigators with wildly differing methods, forced to work together, initially due to reasons outwith their control, but they grudgingly develop a mutual respect for each other over the course of the series, which is probably set in San Francisco.

Wasn't it on at the same time as Dalziel and Makepeace?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 19 February, 2016, 10:55:11 PM
I think the show lost something when the Shark moved out of that sexy narrow boat in the marina.  Moving into a shed was just a bit too Lovejoy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 19 February, 2016, 11:29:11 PM
Cool theme tune, though. Sort of Crazy Like A Fox meets Scarecrow and Mrs King, with an Airwolfish bit in the middle played on the spoons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 20 February, 2016, 10:10:42 AM
I can never remember which one was the dog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 February, 2016, 12:36:51 PM
My favourite episode was that one where the one with the flares and the strategic sock kept hitting the one with the perm and the intelligent alien buttonhole over the head with the briefcase that turned out to contain that prototype spangle bomb Dr Klingwomble was looking for in the Balls Pond Road with that Russian public agent with the nose and camoflaged tarpaulin.

IIRC, this is the first episode in which Kenneth Williams appeared as the East End psychotic costermonger Large Richards in one of his few straight roles. He never got the hang of Large Richards and did descend into farce as the series progressed. His death scene in "The Polari Missile Mishap" lacked emotion due to the wasps, which were never adequately explained. Still, this episode was one of the best - no doubt helped along by Williams's Richards and Gabrielle Drake's infamous accidentally backlit lingerie scene - and of course the plot, which was one of the first to make a modicum of sense - except for the robotic barmaid in the Duck and Deviant, which Slopper Dane spent fifteen minutes explaining and which never appeared again.

The dog, of course, was the one with all the pencils.
(http://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p147/the_legendary_shark/Tordels%20and%20the%20Shark%20PENROSExcf_zps0jfobf51.png)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 February, 2016, 02:26:25 PM
Woof.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mikey on 20 February, 2016, 03:27:00 PM
Too good fellas, I'm onto you - you've obviously been working on the series outlines for a while. I believe direct to Netflix is the way to go.

I've started running. I haven't even ran a bath in around eight years and playing sport is a distant memory, preferring to get my activity jollies yomping (slowly mostly ) up hills, over bogs and along beaches an that. It's that 'couch to 5k thing' and as Mrs Mikey wanted to give it a bash, I thought I'd join her like the massive idiot I am. The minor impediment is now my left knee hurts and it's only the start of week two of nine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 20 February, 2016, 10:19:38 PM
Thanks Jayzsus.

As for Tordels and The Shark.  Who doesn't remember that gem of "odd couple" comedy.   :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 20 February, 2016, 10:25:32 PM
I am very happy the dog has a Cornish sounding name.

I recall his best episode now, you know the one where he flashed back to his origins being rescued from that Chinese puppy sweat shop by the special forces turned slightly bonkers survivalist play by Brian Blessed, who for some reason was still dressed as Voltan.

That was a cracker.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 February, 2016, 05:14:09 AM
That was a good episode, one of the best of Season 5. Adolph Ringpull, director of that episode (The Partially Perspicacious Perils of Penrose), is on record concerning Blessed's Vultan costume:

"There was a strike of the Wardrobe Workers, Pantrights, Dressers and Hosiery Keepers' Union that week over pay and working hours, so the actors were asked to provide their own costumes. Being a contemporaneous drama, most of the fools were able to dress themselves appropriately. The only exceptions were guest stars Nicholas Parsons, who turned up dressed as a Seventeenth Century Prussian admiral and Brian Blessed, who came straight from filming Flash Gordon at Brooklands Industrial Park still dressed as Prince Vultan and, due to a mix-up in communications, thought he was filming pick-ups for the same film. His constantly referring to the pixie mercenaries as his "hawk-men" and occasional and unrelated to the plot ejaculations of "Gordon's alive!" caused me a huge headache at the time but some judicious and quite brilliant editing by T&tS's veteran film editor Slasher Malone turned what should have been a disaster into a BAFTA nominated triumph."

You can read Adolph Ringpull's full musings on the show's fan website here. (http://blank.org/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 February, 2016, 09:45:37 AM
Brings back such memories.  Another example of Blesseds creative madness delivering a triumph.

Did they ever talk about why they had to substitute the dog for a (and now we know why) very poorly costumed Barbara Windsor during the orphanage scene?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 February, 2016, 10:46:57 AM
Apparently that was entirely down to budget. New RSPCA rules imposed on the television industry made the cost of insurance prohibitively expensive, whereas Ms Windsor would work for peanuts at that point in her career due to gambling debts owed to the Krays on the weasel rimming circuit. It is said that Ralphie Kray, unlike his brother Rudy, was a big fan of the show and could often be seen in background shots shaking the extras down for pocket money.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 February, 2016, 11:29:19 AM
What ways amazes me is how effective a poodle she can mak I was utterly convinced even though it all came down to a good hair do.

The biggest surprise though was that none of us, not viewers or critics noticed the dog had changed breed and colour.

Although I have heard that this wasn't the first time. Is it true there was a "shocking" substitute used for Penrose season 3 episode 4?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 February, 2016, 12:28:47 PM
Penrose was actually "played" by twelve dogs over the course of the series. The first was "Sparky," a mongrel picked up by Moomin McGregor, the show's creator and long-time writer, from a whelk-pressing factory in Aberdeen. Sparky played Penrose for just three episodes before being run over by Lionel Blair's souped-up steam-roller, which he drove to all his early jobs in order to stand out from the crowd and save money on petrol.

The dog I think you're talking about, though, wasn't a dog at all but a shaved badger with several differently styled fur coats and stoles glued to it as a kind of costume. Unfortunately, some of these furs transpired to be nylon and not natural, resulting in a build up of static electricity which discharged into the fuel tank of Arthur Mullard's Cessna, causing an explosion that leveled three sound stages at Elstree, sent a cloud of poisonous smoke two miles wide towards Borehamwood railway station and partially blinded the badger. The badger, which was never named, was consequently euthenised in a fit of pique by Lew Grade because his concubine got soot in her stockings.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 February, 2016, 03:21:58 PM
Amazing!  Thank you.

Now that explains season 4, episode 7 when Edna Everage (pre dame days) in one of her occasional parts was heard to exclaim "Lordy darlings, that man is hotter than a Penrose badger" whilst winking at the viewer!

This show was a masterclass of self referential brilliance.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 21 February, 2016, 07:39:52 PM
Situation Update

So I moved. And the place I moved to was perfect. Then the girl at the flat started freaking out and all of a sudden she doesn't want a flatmate any more. (do I really look that scary?)

luckily no money changed hands or anything. So now I'm at a friends place while they are house sitting elsewhere. Which is going to end in a few days and then I need somewhere to live.

On the plus side I've got unlimited internet here. Which is good. And it's not costing me anything to stay here unlike a hotel would. So I appreciate that. It's always good to have friends you can rely on when you need it.

Suffice to say I didn't sleep much last night. I have no car. A car loads worth of things. And I start school this week. At least my life can't get any worse right now?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 February, 2016, 08:32:06 PM
Darn it, good luck with it richer.  Hope you get sorted soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 February, 2016, 10:18:58 PM
Quote from: richerthanyouSo I moved. And the place I moved to was perfect. Then the girl at the flat started freaking out and all of a sudden she doesn't want a flatmate any more. (do I really look that scary?)

I expect she'd just taken a quick look inside your copy of the latest Megazine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 February, 2016, 11:38:22 PM
Chin up, Richer. Something will turn up if you put a little effort in. It's funny how things work out and, in my experience, the trick is to just keep rolling with it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 February, 2016, 12:53:35 AM
Bummer RTY, but I'm sure you'll find somewhere before the goodwill of friends runs out.  What type of schoolin' is it that it starts in late February, if I'm not being too intrusive?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 22 February, 2016, 01:35:01 AM
If it teaches ABE courses it might. The college where I work has a term starting this Monday.Why? Because the ABE December exam results only came out on Tuesday and we needed them to know where to place the students!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 25 February, 2016, 12:26:04 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 February, 2016, 05:14:09 AMYou can read Adolph Ringpull's full musings on the show's fan website here. (http://blank.org/)

Missed a chance to rickroll us there...

I am giggling at work and my cow-orker has asked me what I am reading. It is quite hard to describe. They liked the made up union name though because of where we work. They thought it was quite a realistic sounding union name.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 February, 2016, 12:39:04 PM
Thank you :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 26 February, 2016, 08:00:24 PM
Situation Update #2

I am still living in the same place. My friend is back from house sitting so I have been demoted to the floor. Luckily I've been out all week so I've not been getting in the way. The weekend could be different though. My biggest problem about living this far from Uni is the 2 hour commute every morning. And the cost of that trip.

At some point my friend is going to get sick of me. I tidied the house up today and hoovered and stuff, did the washing up etc. Lets hope that buys me a few more days :)

On a positive note, uni starts on Monday. So maybe someone can help me find a flat from there. Who knows.

RTY out :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 26 February, 2016, 09:33:35 PM
yeah, network like mad when you get there - there will be lots of people in the same boat at the start of term, or people who've been there in the past, so just ask everyone you meet how they sorted accommodation - they may suggest things you hadn't considered or been aware of.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 28 February, 2016, 07:32:20 PM
I just had to open a tin of tomatoes with a hammer. You can imagine the results.

Now it seems that I've also rubbed chili into my septum. Home cooking is a minefield.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 28 February, 2016, 09:19:23 PM
Quote from: richerthanyou on 26 February, 2016, 08:00:24 PM
Situation Update #2

I am still living in the same place. My friend is back from house sitting so I have been demoted to the floor. Luckily I've been out all week so I've not been getting in the way. The weekend could be different though. My biggest problem about living this far from Uni is the 2 hour commute every morning. And the cost of that trip.

At some point my friend is going to get sick of me. I tidied the house up today and hoovered and stuff, did the washing up etc. Lets hope that buys me a few more days :)

On a positive note, uni starts on Monday. So maybe someone can help me find a flat from there. Who knows.

RTY out :)

I was in your position last year for about 4 months, going from sofa to spare room to sofa and generally getting on peope's tits.  It got really, really tough after a while.  I hope it goes better for you.

My scooter which I bought about 6 weeks ago (you may remember me falling off it on this very thread) died on the way to work.  The mechanic says he can't find the problem.  I loved it and I'm gutted.  Second scooter to go tits up this year, and we're not even two months in.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 29 February, 2016, 03:37:05 PM
I was at a works night out on Friday and when I turned up this morning one of the ladies apologised profusely for her behaviour towards me except I was so gassed myself I don't know what she did. Probably for the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 29 February, 2016, 06:46:41 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 29 February, 2016, 03:37:05 PM
I was at a works night out on Friday and when I turned up this morning one of the ladies apologised profusely for her behaviour towards me except I was so gassed myself I don't know what she did. Probably for the best.
Heh, this happens to me all the time. Or i'm the one apologising.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 29 February, 2016, 07:14:42 PM
Quote from: Hawkmonger on 29 February, 2016, 06:46:41 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 29 February, 2016, 03:37:05 PM
I was at a works night out on Friday and when I turned up this morning one of the ladies apologised profusely for her behaviour towards me except I was so gassed myself I don't know what she did. Probably for the best.
Heh, this happens to me all the time. Or i'm the one apologising.

I got two such apologies from the office's Christmas do last year.

One was from a lovely girl who sent a mass text asking if anyone had seen her phone. (And then got confused when, pantomine like, she got many replies saying "in your hand")
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 01 March, 2016, 11:13:02 PM
It's a 45 minute ferry ride to the mainland. And now 3 hours later and I'm still feeling like im on a boat. Dizziness, loss of balance, general feeling of sickness...

So concentration at my first lecture was non existent. And the plan was to go to the gym before my next one. But feeling like this I'm likely to drop a dumbbell on my face. While this may help me in the looks department, I really don't fancy the pain involved.

So yeah. Today isn't the best. Still, could be worse. Lets just hope the zombie apocalypse doesn't start today or I'm well stuffed....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 02 March, 2016, 03:17:50 PM
I have about 6 weeks worth of progs to catch up on and have just realised I've missed one from 3 weeks ago so now have to order missing prog and wait for its arrival until I catch up. This is the first prog Ive missed in about 10 years  >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 March, 2016, 08:55:29 PM
Just had first negative feedback on eBay in sixteen years.

Item wasn't delivered (a free hotel vanity kit!), and buyer not happy despite being shown proof of postage. Buyer contacted me this evening and asked for a refund which I did via PayPal several minutes later, but her feedback accuses me of not sending the refund.

She also accuses me of "appalling" communication despite me being kind, courteous and swift to reply.  Buyer has opened dispute so eBay won't remove the feedback.

Not sure of her motives but she's ruined my evening.

~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 09 March, 2016, 09:12:00 PM
Quote from: Banners on 09 March, 2016, 08:55:29 PM
~sigh~

KILL HER.

Cheers!

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Buttonman on 09 March, 2016, 09:13:38 PM
Condolences Banners.

http://www.theonion.com/blogpost/i-cant-believe-you-blew-my-perfect-feedback-rating-10727 (http://www.theonion.com/blogpost/i-cant-believe-you-blew-my-perfect-feedback-rating-10727)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 09 March, 2016, 09:47:25 PM
Just saw my next door neighbor pop outside for a fag for the third time today.  Her baby's due within the month.
My washing machine packed up about two months back and I'm only just getting someone in to connect up the new one - which I noticed today has - despite weighing the better part of a ton - been stolen from the hall by the landlord of the downstairs flat.

Quote from: Banners on 09 March, 2016, 08:55:29 PMNot sure of her motives but she's ruined my evening.

She's left the feedback so she can open an official dispute with eBay, as they automatically refund the disputed amount from your account if a certain amount of time goes by with no resolution - even if there's no resolution because the person who opened the dispute remains incommunicado until the clock runs out.  Basically she's trying to get refunded again.  If she's trying to pull that one, it might be possible the package did arrive and she just said it didn't.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 March, 2016, 09:57:00 PM
Check the feedback she's left for others and look for a pattern.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 09 March, 2016, 10:39:32 PM
Quote from: Ollamh Iompróidh
My washing machine packed up about two months back and I'm only just getting someone in to connect up the new one - which I noticed today has - despite weighing the better part of a ton - been stolen from the hall by the landlord of the downstairs flat.

Thanks for the input, fellas – though this seems a lot more alarming! Anything you can do about it?

Quote from: The Legendary SharkCheck the feedback she's left for others and look for a pattern.

Her feedback went private tonight so not sure what I can do. Probably just best to move on. Saying that, I remembered the exact same thing happened back in 2005 (http://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=21601.0) when my responses  (http://www.aptronym.co.uk/dispute.html)where somewhat more diligent.

(Weird how this site documents so many aspects of my life...!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 March, 2016, 10:43:29 PM
Private to everyone or just you? Easy enough to check with an I.P. cloak and new account...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 March, 2016, 09:03:11 AM
Private to everyone (http://feedback.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewFeedback2&userid=buyerofdistinction&ftab=AllFeedback&myworld=true&rt=nc&_trksid=p2050430.m2531.l4585) I think.

Absolutely crazy. Literally had a sleepless night, and although it really is a minor impediment and there are far many more problems in the world, I just can't stop thinking about it. A shame.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 March, 2016, 11:22:09 AM
Hiding her feedback seems suspicious, to me. Why would she not want you to see what feedback she's left for others? Scammer?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 10 March, 2016, 01:30:20 PM
Quote from: Banners on 10 March, 2016, 09:03:11 AM
Absolutely crazy. Literally had a sleepless night, and although it really is a minor impediment and there are far many more problems in the world, I just can't stop thinking about it. A shame.
That's a right pain, Banners. Sounds dodgy. I understand the upset when one's integrity is questioned.

Ordering stuff online and dealing with deliveries is hassle one way or another. Add into the equation idiot/crooked delivery men and we can never be 100% sure what goes on. Not saying that is the case here, but I've been kind of stung in the past.

When we lived in a shared block I accepted a package for a neighbour. Idiot delivery man put a card through wrong door saying I had the package. So I had one neighbour knocking on my door to collect a package not intended for them. Making me look like a thief.

Couple of years ago, fed up of that sort of hassle I refused to accept a package for the previous owner of our house. Delivery man said ok, I just need to sign for package to go back.

Day later the same company tried to deliver again. I explained I already rejected package and asked if I need to sign? No he said. Seemed odd.

I then had messages from neighbours saying the previous owner of our house would like to contact me to collect her phone which I "signed for "! 

So I reckon some bastard crooked delivery man at DPD got me to sign his electronic gadget, fibbing that I was signing for rejecting the delivery but in reality signing to accept it. While he made off with his loot.

I later had a card from another courier company via the phone company to collect the package from me – which dodgy delivery man had. 

When I realised I called DPD. They couldn't deal with this as I didn't have a booking ref or contact email address as I didn't arrange the delivery. They said it is not correct procedure to sign for a package to be returned.

I passed a message back through neighbours but the previous owner had received a replacement phone.

We hadn't lived here that long and I'm still paranoid that the neighbours might think that we are dodgy. Apparently I signed to accept that package so in their and the intended recipients eyes we made off with the package. Infuriating. Looking back I wish I made more of it. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 10 March, 2016, 03:50:50 PM
Hey Banners, my mate sells second-hand sofas and so on and had exactly this kind of scam run on him by some woman recently. Tried to claim it had never been delivered - and then tried to claim money off the delivery service for damaging the thing she'd never had delivered.

I'll ask him to give me her details maybe it's the same woman :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 March, 2016, 05:08:10 PM
I spent a couple of hours trying to find out about her past dealings but to no avail, sorry. There are still a couple of things I want to try but I don't have high hopes. Frustrating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 March, 2016, 07:51:12 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk
Hey Banners, my mate sells second-hand sofas and so on and had exactly this kind of scam run on him by some woman recently. Tried to claim it had never been delivered - and then tried to claim money off the delivery service for damaging the thing she'd never had delivered.

Thanks Blaze. I can 'understand' someone scamming on an item worth a bit of money like a sofa, because you'd potentially get double that money back to make it worth your while ie. the seller would refund you, and then the impenetrable eBay and PayPal would go and debit the seller's card (despite the seller's protests and evidence).

But this was for a couple of little vanity kits taken from hotels and found after a Mrs Banners Spring-clean, so are essentially worthless. And they sold for just £4.20 (minus £2.80 P&P), so when – inevitably – the resolution process finds in her favour, the buyer will stand to make a mighty £8.40. What is the point?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 10 March, 2016, 07:57:13 PM
Quote from: The Legendary SharkI spent a couple of hours trying to find out about her past dealings but to no avail, sorry. There are still a couple of things I want to try but I don't have high hopes. Frustrating.

Gosh, you truly are a legend! Thank you—I am humbled.

It's just amazing how this thing is still going around my head. I spent lots of time trying to find info online as I lay awake last night. I have the lady's name and email address, her home address registered with eBay, and also the address of the shop where the item 'should have' been delivered to.

It's not like I want to physically track her down, I'm just trying to find something – anything – that might explain her bizarre and spiteful behaviour.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 March, 2016, 08:02:46 PM
No probs. Sometimes, people link their Ebay activities with Facebook, Twitter, etc. See if she's been bragging on social media, message boards or a blog...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 10 March, 2016, 08:10:28 PM
What gets my goat is those who buy an item and ask to cancel with comments like "I didn't realise I was bidding", or "I don't want it", or "I've changed my mind", or (my own favourite, given they set the bid) "it costs too much."

I just tell 'em to feck off and ignore them. One even had the cheek to email details of how a seller can cancel.

I've stood by a couple of deeply drunken purchases.

So, too bad. You bid, you pay. You've outbid those who wanted it. Ebay even give a big warning about not bidding unless you are commited to pay, so hell frigging mend you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 March, 2016, 08:17:02 PM
I once busted a guy with two accounts who used one of them to up the bids on the other. Ebay wasn't interested.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 11 March, 2016, 01:16:56 AM
Quote from: Banners on 10 March, 2016, 07:57:13 PM
It's just amazing how this thing is still going around my head. I spent lots of time trying to find info online as I lay awake last night. I have the lady's name and email address, her home address registered with eBay, and also the address of the shop where the item 'should have' been delivered to.

It's not like I want to physically track her down, I'm just trying to find something – anything – that might explain her bizarre and spiteful behaviour.
Really not trying to be a prick but isn't this a contradiction in terms? Bizarre behaviour is not logical. Some people are helmets. Please don't lose sleep over it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 14 March, 2016, 03:31:11 PM
Finally got to tackle the downstairs landlord about his making off with my washing machine and was met first with laughter, then umming and ahhing, then he asked for a few minutes to compose his thoughts.  He later knocked at the door and claimed that it was an honest mistake and he'd dumped it, which was fair enough as the thing wasn't exactly mint condition and its main virtue to me was simply that it was working, even if I'm stumped why he dumped the heaviest item he could find but didn't dump any of the trash around it - which actually belongs to the downstairs tenants - and which remains there even now.
Unfortunately he kept talking: it was a piece of shit anyway and he was actually doing me a favor, it shouldn't have been in the hall, he won't complain about the water damage to the roof of his flat (which we traced to a leak located in a vent connecting both flats but to get at it necessitated my taking a sledgehammer to the wall in my back room and paying for the plumber), I was probably lying to him which he could prove if he looked around my flat to see if I had a new washing machine recently installed, then he offered a tenner for me to go and look around local charity shops for a new machine, then he stormed off promising to get his solicitor involved to charge me for repairs to his bathroom roof - during this time, I hadn't actually managed to say a single word, he just kept gabbling and getting louder and louder until he cleared off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 March, 2016, 05:41:12 PM
Feck's sake Bear, he's letting you live in his building, and talking to you using his mouth, I think you should just count your blessings and stop making trouble.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 14 March, 2016, 08:58:17 PM
He owns the downstairs flat, not the one I live in.  I sledgehammered our back wall and paid for a plumber myself to fix a leak that was technically his and the council's problem, and ever since I've had a chimney that runs from the downstairs flat into my own, delivering the smell of legal and illegal forms of smoke, sweat, stale alcohol, burning food, and despair directly the room I sleep in.

Also, did you know that female dogs can develop a condition called "phantom pregnancy" which compels them to whine and howl constantly for no reason whatsoever, and to hoard fluffy toys like they were pups, licking them lovingly while crying because - in the words of my vet - "possibly they think their babies are dead"?  I have discovered in the last few days that this is an actual thing.  It's good to learn new things, I have heard, but it does not feel like it right now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 March, 2016, 09:08:16 PM
See, you're arguing again. Will you ever learn?

Yeah, sorry, I forgot the downstairs landlord was just that. Dog thing seems magnificently grim, awful situation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 March, 2016, 09:37:44 PM
Humans can also suffer from phantom pregnancies, specifically people who have suffered from dementia from a young age. And yes, I do not feel any happier knowing this is a thing. Poor devils.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 14 March, 2016, 10:56:29 PM
I don't think it's that specific. It's been a few years since I read anything about it, but I seem to remember there was some debate about whether it was primarily a psychological or physical condition, due to seemingly genuine symptoms of pregnancy that often fool medical doctors. It can also happen to men, (which probably doesn't often fool medical doctors).

More common in dogs, (and mice), though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 15 March, 2016, 02:28:56 PM
So, in order to redintegrate my eBay imbroglio, I had to sign a form saying the feedback was defamatory under English law. I'm no Judge ~ahem~ but that seemed to be the case so I sent the form and now the dishonest feedback has been removed, but in a half-arsed way.

What has actually happened is that the negative feedback remains but the specific words used have been removed. That kind of implies that as far as eBay are concerned the negative feedback was justified (which it wasn't), and that it is only the specific wording used which was not allowed.

As such, I still have a black mark against my name, and my feedback won't be corrected and still shows <100%. So, the damage is done and eBay have not helped in righting this wrong properly.

I am thinking twice about using eBay in future—not just because of their apparent ineptitude, but also because the potential value of anything I might sell will now be negatively affected by this stain on my profile.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 15 March, 2016, 02:43:41 PM
That sucks.
.
Might change soon, though, as Ebay and Gumtree have been taken over by a Yorkshire firm. The two will be amalgamated and rebranded as Ebaygum...
.
I'll get me coat.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 March, 2016, 02:45:02 PM
Quote from: Banners on 15 March, 2016, 02:28:56 PM
I am thinking twice about using eBay in future—not just because of their apparent ineptitude, but also because the potential value of anything I might sell will now be negatively affected by this stain on my profile.
I honestly can't tell if you're being serious about how much this is getting to you or if you're pretending to overreact for comic effect. I hope it's the latter but apologise for my lack of empathy if it's the former.

I can only speak for how I look at these things but I don't think any potential buyer is going to give a shit about one negative rating. Obviously, that assumes a reasonable number of total deals. If it's one negative  from two then I'd be wary but, the more sales you've made, then the greater the chance of a mistake, a mishap or a loonie and everyone knows that's how eBay works.

Personally, I wouldn't have any qualms at all about dealing with somebody with >95% positive. If it's something like a couple of quid for a comic, my threshold would be significantly lower.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 March, 2016, 03:18:36 PM
I'd agree completely with The Cosh (as always).  One or two bad feedbacks just reflects the perverse nature of our fellow netizens.  Anyone who has sold anything on eBay themselves (surely most of us) know the dickery that goes on - my wife still maons about someone who bought a blanket for a doll's bed from her and complained that it was too small for an adult, was refunded in good faith, and continued to complain about bad service, rudeness, misdirection...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 15 March, 2016, 03:20:28 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 15 March, 2016, 02:43:41 PM
Might change soon, though, as Ebay and Gumtree have been taken over by a Yorkshire firm. The two will be amalgamated and rebranded as Ebaygum...

Dear grud man, how do you sleep at night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 15 March, 2016, 04:02:38 PM
Fitfully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 15 March, 2016, 04:39:21 PM
Banners, I'm with Cosh and Tordels on this.  Although I will always glance at feedback from anyone with less than 100% positive, I always check the comments and dialogue that goes with it.  If the seller has been mardy about the feedback then I tend to shy away.  If it the comments are along the line of 'well, tried to sort it out but the buyer were having nowt of it' type then it is pretty clear who is at fault.  If a buyer is going to be put off by the muppetry of this type of seller then do you really want their business?  (okay, yes to their money!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 15 March, 2016, 04:58:21 PM
Thanks, fellas. I guess I have been overreacting, but it's just a kind of mixture of anger (at first), befuddlement and sheer curiosity ie. how could anyone behave like that? But the consensus above is right—if I see one isolated piece of negative feedback when I buy stuff, it's pretty obvious that that buyer has been in the wrong, and not the seller. Deep breath, move on...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 15 March, 2016, 06:30:15 PM
mum in law fell and fractured her shoulder and gashed her head so the wifes having to go down to her every day added to that my daughter had a day I  hospital last week due to showing the signs for meningitis minus the rash,thankfully she got an all clear and they are putting it down to a virus still,10 hours in two hospitals aint fun!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 15 March, 2016, 07:31:32 PM
Been lurking in the board for the most part in the last year, but feel I may need to stop viewing the forum, as a certain forum members recent posts have triggered me and my recent experiences. :( I probably can't go into it in any more detail.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 March, 2016, 09:21:56 AM
Quote from: BannersDeep breath, move on...

...although pretty difficult to do now the buyer has left more untruthful follow-up feedback (which I have no ability to respond to) and reported me for harassment. ~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 March, 2016, 12:27:51 AM
I wouldn't worry about it. She's obviously to be pitied. As others have said, one nutter isn't going to ruin you. Most people who shop on Ebay know about these shopping troll-ies and a quick inspection of her private feedback thingummy should convince them what's going on. These people were put on Earth to be risen above.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 17 March, 2016, 12:35:59 AM
The Shark was a mere 14 miles away from my house yesterday, as he was delivering to my work place and I couldn't get over to see him, as I was waiting for Sam to be dropped off from school and making the tea.
So near, yet so far my dear Sharky :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 March, 2016, 01:34:04 AM
Some people might say you dodged a bullet, there ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 17 March, 2016, 05:43:37 AM
Quote from: Tim Tailz on 15 March, 2016, 07:31:32 PM
Been lurking in the board for the most part in the last year, but feel I may need to stop viewing the forum, as a certain forum members recent posts have triggered me and my recent experiences. :( I probably can't go into it in any more detail.

Get yourself over to the Black Dog thread fella.  Plenty of support there.  No details necessary.  Lot of folks hereabouts have been in similar places and are always ready to lend a supportive keyboard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 March, 2016, 09:06:31 AM
(Sorry to go on about this – I know I'm a bore – but just one final comment to put on record that, as predicted, the dispute was found in the buyer's favour despite them not contributing to the case in the 'Resolution Centre' and all the evidence to the contrary).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Steve Green on 17 March, 2016, 10:04:45 AM
Oh, that's rubbish Banners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 17 March, 2016, 10:41:19 AM
happened to me recently,sold a tablet,(cheapish binatone one) and forgot tp do recorded...she claimed she didn't get it despite several other feedbacks suggesting she did this a lot and claimed.ebay found in her favour of course and I as a seller cant leave neg feedback.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ThryllSeekyr on 17 March, 2016, 10:58:13 AM
Not sure if this is thread related, but I was wondering when it would be Saint Patrick's Day and found that it was today (http://forums.2000adonline.com/Smileys/default/eek.gif)

On my way to celebration  (http://forums.2000adonline.com/Smileys/default/eek.gif)

Even though, all official parades and stuff like that have already been done earlier this week. Well, that's what it says.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 March, 2016, 12:37:29 PM
Quote from: Banners on 17 March, 2016, 09:06:31 AM
(Sorry to go on about this – I know I'm a bore – but just one final comment to put on record that, as predicted, the dispute was found in the buyer's favour despite them not contributing to the case in the 'Resolution Centre' and all the evidence to the contrary).

This was the reason I stopped using eBay - they encourage this type of scam because they get a cut from the transactions.  I'd make sure your bank is under instruction not to allow any transfer of funds to eBay if you decide to stop using them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 17 March, 2016, 05:08:45 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 17 March, 2016, 05:43:37 AM
Quote from: Tim Tailz on 15 March, 2016, 07:31:32 PM
Been lurking in the board for the most part in the last year, but feel I may need to stop viewing the forum, as a certain forum members recent posts have triggered me and my recent experiences. :( I probably can't go into it in any more detail.

Get yourself over to the Black Dog thread fella.  Plenty of support there.  No details necessary.  Lot of folks hereabouts have been in similar places and are always ready to lend a supportive keyboard.

Thank you. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 March, 2016, 09:02:21 AM
There's a bitch on heat in one of the caravans on the site and it's driving my dog crazy. I have a folded towel against the gap chasm under the door rattle bung, acting as a makeshift draught excluder hurricane filter, but he keeps dragging this aside with his paw and standing with his nose squeezed into the gap, whining like a badly maintained wheelbarrow. It's driving us both daft.

Work is exceedingly thin on the ground consisting of the occasional three hour job to Rochdale, where the staff at the Asda CDC I deliver to have all the warmth, charm and enthusiasm as a sack of wet cats in a 'fridge, and back to base - where my boss looms like an unpredictable volcano filled with cheap Korean atom bombs and flowers. When he erupts, you never know what he's going to spew out. The other type of job, as happened on Wednesday, is a 'phone call from the Heart of Panic which tips me out of bed and sends me hurtling towards some far-flung corner of the country without any breakfast or even a cup of coffee. Then there's nothing for days and days and days on end and I sit here in my hut waiting for the 'phone to ring, reading, trying to write and listening to my quivering, sex-obsessed dog squeaking and trying not to go insane.

I've also lost my Bluetooth headset and a carrier bag full of underpants.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 18 March, 2016, 03:12:31 PM
Hhhhermmm...now I might have been out of the loop a bit but when did Arrow Video stop putting booklets in their standard releases?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 18 March, 2016, 11:33:52 PM
You get most standard British TV channels on cable over here, but some programmes are subject to regional variations and licencing restrictions. So you get a blank screen when you turn over to a live Champions League match or the 6:30 regional news slot on BBC1.

Pretty irritated to get back home after a couple of pints to find the first in Film 4's season of kung-fu classics - Boxer from Shantung - is blocked. I'll be moderately angry if this means I'm going to miss The Invincible Pole Fighters again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 19 March, 2016, 07:46:22 AM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 18 March, 2016, 03:12:31 PM
Hhhhermmm...now I might have been out of the loop a bit but when did Arrow Video stop putting booklets in their standard releases?

What release are you referring to?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 19 March, 2016, 09:22:01 AM
Quote from: The Legendary SharkI've also lost my Bluetooth headset and a carrier bag full of underpants.

Losing a carrier bag full of underpants shouldn't happen to anyone. We must all send a spare pair so you don't go without... ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 March, 2016, 09:25:48 AM
The errant underpants have since been rediscovered - in the boot of a friend's car... Thanks for the offer, though! (I think.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 March, 2016, 03:43:38 PM
On doctor's orders, my weekend breakfasts have gone from this ...

(http://i531.photobucket.com/albums/dd359/anaconda888/001-3.jpg)

to this ...

(http://i531.photobucket.com/albums/dd359/anaconda888/breakfast-now_zpsubtbwyrf.jpg)

and my dinner one night last week was ...

(http://i531.photobucket.com/albums/dd359/anaconda888/dinner_zpsbci2x2ys.jpg)

I am so hungry!  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 March, 2016, 06:01:09 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 19 March, 2016, 09:25:48 AM
The errant underpants have since been rediscovered - in the boot of a friend's car...

La vida loca indeed!  seamless segue Hope the randy dog situation has eased too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 20 March, 2016, 06:23:24 PM
Lot of goodness in it, but I wonder what the sugar content of that bowl of muesli is.

Some cereals should be classified as dessert. I stick to Shredded Wheat but end up pouring honey on for flavour.

Minus the bacon, is a full English breakfast that unhealthy? Depending on how it's cooked of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 20 March, 2016, 06:47:35 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 20 March, 2016, 03:43:38 PM
On doctor's orders, my weekend breakfasts have gone from this ...

to this ...


Bloody hell.  Your doctor ordered you to cut down on thrill power too?  No wonder you're struggling!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 20 March, 2016, 06:50:40 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 20 March, 2016, 06:47:35 PM
Bloody hell.  Your doctor ordered you to cut down on thrill power too?  No wonder you're struggling!

:lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 20 March, 2016, 06:54:45 PM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 20 March, 2016, 06:23:24 PM
Minus the bacon, is a full English breakfast that unhealthy? Depending on how it's cooked of course.

Grilled lean bacon, grilled tomatoes and scrambled eggs are a completely Slimming World-approved breakfast (as long as you do the eggs in the microwave, which means you can avoid adding butter). Pretty sure the beans would be OK if you got the reduced sugar ones, and you can wrap mushrooms in foil and grill them with a little Fry-Lite for a perfectly acceptable low-fat version.

Not saying any of that would pass muster on DDD's new dietary regimen, mind you!

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 March, 2016, 07:40:09 PM
A full English without bacon? Scrambled eggs without butter?  :o

Are you people insane?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 20 March, 2016, 08:07:16 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 20 March, 2016, 06:54:45 PM
Grilled lean bacon, grilled tomatoes and scrambled eggs are a completely Slimming World-approved breakfast (as long as you do the eggs in the microwave, which means you can avoid adding butter). Pretty sure the beans would be OK if you got the reduced sugar ones, and you can wrap mushrooms in foil and grill them with a little Fry-Lite for a perfectly acceptable low-fat version.
Makes sense to me. I don't believe in diets as I don't believe that anyone can diet forever. And I don't believe anyone should go hungry in order to eat healthily.

We are bombarded with confusing messages regarding food. Many of those are marketing messages, not health expert messages. Like the nonsense of 'superfruit' and the 'low fat' scam.

Just modifying here to add: I am not referring to Slimming World-approved meals as 'diets'. I don't know anything about Slimming World approved meals, but what I see above I don't consider a diet but a change to eating/cooking habits that one can make in order to eat healthily and happily. We should enjoy our grub.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 20 March, 2016, 08:16:28 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 20 March, 2016, 06:54:45 PM

Grilled lean bacon, grilled tomatoes and scrambled eggs are a completely Slimming World-approved breakfast (as long as you do the eggs in the microwave, which means you can avoid adding butter). Pretty sure the beans would be OK if you got the reduced sugar ones, and you can wrap mushrooms in foil and grill them with a little Fry-Lite for a perfectly acceptable low-fat version.



This news makes me very happy indeed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 March, 2016, 11:12:31 PM
So in conclusion, and with apologies to those not interested and/or whose impediments are somewhat more major...

After 11 vituperative emails, two legal forms I had to sign in order to prove defamation, detailed evidence in the 'Resolution Centre' (within a dispute which the buyer opened but then didn't contribute to), three lengthy live chats, a phone call and five tweets, eBay have finally seen my point of view. The negative feedback has been removed in its entirety, my rating has been adjusted back to 100%, and I've had a conciliatory email from someone in the US called Cameron.

It's a nice feeling, but it really shouldn't be that hard. Furthermore, if eBay are still arbitrarily punishing sellers for not using a trackable form of postage, then they really shouldn't allow you to list items without some form of recorded delivery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 20 March, 2016, 11:26:16 PM
We'll done Banners, your perseverance paid off and the fact that you were in the right :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 21 March, 2016, 06:53:29 AM
Quote from: Banners on 20 March, 2016, 11:12:31 PM
Furthermore, if eBay are still arbitrarily punishing sellers for not using a trackable form of postage, then they really shouldn't allow you to list items without some form of recorded delivery.

Or taking a cut of postage charges...

Still.  Glad it's sorted.  Why is it that the moment companies become a certain size they become complete bar stewards?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 March, 2016, 07:34:57 AM
"This Cursed eBay will not break me! I am 100% Positive Feedback! I am Banners... Justified Banners!"

Nice one! I am now expecting a Trading Places style denouement, where it is revealed the value of the item was in fact $1.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 21 March, 2016, 08:21:11 AM
Quote from: SuperSurfer on 20 March, 2016, 08:07:16 PM
Just modifying here to add: I am not referring to Slimming World-approved meals as 'diets'. I don't know anything about Slimming World approved meals, but what I see above I don't consider a diet but a change to eating/cooking habits that one can make in order to eat healthily and happily. We should enjoy our grub.

This seems to be more or less how Slimming World works -- I haven't measured, weighed or calorie counted anything in the few months I've been doing it, but I've consistently lost weight without ever going hungry.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 08:48:39 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 20 March, 2016, 07:40:09 PM
A full English without bacon? Scrambled eggs without butter?  :o

Are you people insane?

No, just compassionate.

Doctor's aren't always particularly good nutritionists (or any form of nutriotinist).  Depending on the reason for the change of diet, as Jim suggests, there are plenty of ways that you can cut down the bad stuff without sacrificing enjoyment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 21 March, 2016, 10:41:27 AM
microwaved eggs are wrong...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: NapalmKev on 21 March, 2016, 11:34:58 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 21 March, 2016, 10:41:27 AM
microwaved eggs are wrong...

They are indeed! I visited a 'Subway' some years ago enticed by their "Eat Fresh" signs. I asked for egg and a piece of yellow something was taken out of the fridge and slapped into the microwave.

Fresh my Arse!

Cheers
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 March, 2016, 12:01:10 PM
to be clear, I've not been given a specific diet just told to lose weight and reduce my blood pressure & cholesterol, so I've cut out butter, bacon, crisps, biscuits and chocolate, as well as my Friday evening home-drinking session. I'm having less sugar in tea & coffee and eating more fish and chicken as opposed to red meat and lots of salad and vegetables rather then chips.

Cheers for all your encouragement!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 21 March, 2016, 12:13:17 PM
Yep, after 13 years, I just hand in a notice at work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 21 March, 2016, 12:27:26 PM
Good man, Goaty.  Hope you've something else lined up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 March, 2016, 12:33:24 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 21 March, 2016, 12:13:17 PM
Yep, after 13 years, I just hand in a notice at work.

You were Ian Duncan Smith all along?!?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 21 March, 2016, 12:39:05 PM
 :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 21 March, 2016, 12:44:23 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 21 March, 2016, 12:01:10 PM
to be clear, I've not been given a specific diet just told to lose weight and reduce my blood pressure & cholesterol, so I've cut out butter, bacon, crisps, biscuits and chocolate, as well as my Friday evening home-drinking session. I'm having less sugar in tea & coffee and eating more fish and chicken as opposed to red meat and lots of salad and vegetables rather then chips.

Cheers for all your encouragement!
Good luck with the healthier eating!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 21 March, 2016, 02:25:09 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 21 March, 2016, 10:41:27 AM
microwaved eggs are wrong...

Scrambled eggs are just fine. There's a knack to it, but it's quick and easy and, as I say, easier to make a low-fat version. Since my Dad was only a year older than I am now when he had a heart attack that the doctors said he was lucky to survive, not following in the family tradition is a bit of a preoccupation of mine...

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 02:40:41 PM
Microwaved scrambled eggs are nomnomnom! Figure I'll make some for breaky now.

On the topic of eggs, I've a hypothetical question for some of our vegan forumites. Contrary to popular belief, eggs are a waste product, and fowl only live in the same 50 metre square space their while life, so could a mutually beneficial relationship between free range hens and humans, where the latter can provide the former with given food source, not still be considered friendly?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 03:15:56 PM
If you have a big enough farm and a hen running round unfettered and leaving waste product around for you to pick up then feel free to fill your boots. I wouldn't myself.

If I found myself in the same hypothetical situation? Much like the hypothetical animals only desert island I keep getting invited to live on, I prefer to spend my time addressing the very real, unhypothetical, world situation we live in by not continuing to the torture and murder of animals.

Importantly, that set up is not viable to maintain the demand for eggs (not just as eggs but also as ingredients in other foods)  that we currently have though. And never will be.

What is currently defined as free range can vary in size. Sometimes it means an area no bigger than a piece of A4 paper (battery hens have it ridiculouslying bad, often with beaks and claws removed without anaesthetic and never seeing daylight).

Plus there's the problem of what they do with male chicks. These are of no use to the egg industry so are unceremoniously slaughtered. There are plenty of videos around of the male chicks being thrown live into grinders that might be of interest.

So, no, not an  acceptable solution for me or most compassionate people.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 21 March, 2016, 03:24:37 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 03:15:56 PM
So, no, not an  acceptable solution for me or most compassionate people.

You understand that it's this consistently judgemental tone of moral superiority that gets people's backs up and does your cause no fucking favours, don't you?

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 21 March, 2016, 03:56:26 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 21 March, 2016, 12:01:10 PM
to be clear, I've not been given a specific diet just told to lose weight and reduce my blood pressure & cholesterol

I was told by my GP that unless it's sky-high, only about 10-15 percent of blood cholesterol is actually affected by diet.  Did yours proscribe statins?  GPs seem to be giving those out like sweeties these days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 04:32:06 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 21 March, 2016, 03:24:37 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 03:15:56 PM
So, no, not an  acceptable solution for me or most compassionate people.

You understand that it's this consistently judgemental tone of moral superiority that gets people's backs up and does your cause no fucking favours, don't you?

Jim

Heh heh. I suppose not.  I'll think about how to adjust what I say. It's meant to convey that I'm doing it for the ethics rather than the health or the environmental benefits (though those do play a big part).

I try not to be judgemental but sadly don't always succeed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 March, 2016, 05:40:28 PM
There are about a dozen hens wandering free around the site where I'm living - rooting about in woodlands and meadows and under caravans and returning to roost at night. They squeeze out so many eggs that the lady who owns the place is slewed out with them - which means free free-range eggs for me. And very nice they are too.

Sometimes, though, the occasional hen does get eaten by foxes or possibly werewolves. I guess free-range isn't all idylls and roses. Still, yummy eggs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 05:44:03 PM
I think you got a little carried away their, Tips, all the irks* you brought up where solved in the (admitidly hypothetical but still practical) question. And as Sharky said, it can and has been implemented.

*When I say free range I MEAN free range, as I said in the wild fowl will live in the same 50M squared area all their lives.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 21 March, 2016, 06:29:50 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 21 March, 2016, 12:33:24 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 21 March, 2016, 12:13:17 PM
Yep, after 13 years, I just hand in a notice at work.

You were Ian Duncan Smith all along?!?

I know it seems like a lifetime since those bar stewards got back in but has it been 13 years already????
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 March, 2016, 06:43:39 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 21 March, 2016, 06:29:50 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 21 March, 2016, 12:33:24 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 21 March, 2016, 12:13:17 PM
Yep, after 13 years, I just hand in a notice at work.

You were Ian Duncan Smith all along?!?

I know it seems like a lifetime since those bar stewards got back in but has it been 13 years already????

Not quite, but the last time Goaty,.. errr, IDS resigned was (almost) 13 years ago, when he stood down as party leader.

And best of luck Goaty!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 08:45:14 PM
Yes, I got that. That's why the first part of my answer was saying it was fine if you like that sort of thing.

But it's not a viable solution for industrial scale egg production that is the food retail industry requires.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 09:09:01 PM
The only solution to that is the ethic i've implanted into my own diet choice, eat less, eat local.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 11:09:56 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 21 March, 2016, 03:24:37 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 21 March, 2016, 03:15:56 PM
So, no, not an  acceptable solution for me or most compassionate people.

You understand that it's this consistently judgemental tone of moral superiority that gets people's backs up and does your cause no fucking favours, don't you?

Jim

Actually thinking back, I was way too conciliatory in my original response to this.

Yes. Compassion. It's not a bad thing.

And yes, I have made a morale stance on this and I do think that most people have made the wrong call when it comes to animals.

You are a smart man who presumably knows what torture and murder goes on in the name of the food industry. (I am not even going to get into the environmental stuff here).

Yet you choose to ignore this for whatever reason.  It could be convenience, whatever.

Bottom line is you know the facts but still choose murder and torture of another species. I knowvthe facts too and I choose compassion.

I might suggest it's not me adoptING a superior tone.

It's everybody else gets ridiculously defensive when they think about their shortcomings.

If having a sweary go at me, and picking apart every little syntactic mistake or slightly incorrect use of a word I made when writing this makes you feel better about that and let's you eat another bacon sandwich while moaning about preachy vegans then enjoy yourself.

(If I recall one boarder has issues digesting anything other than animal flesh - so I won't consider that in the above).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 11:18:48 PM
My only problem with your "murder in the name of the food chain" speal (yes, I excluded torture from that quote because i've agreed with you from the very beginning that battery farming is awful and I don't support it, move on!) is it doesn't take into account other omnivorous or even carnivourous species. Are these organisms also evil, does the lion playing with it's pray know the torture it's inducing? What about pescatarians and insectivores*? Or is it just things you personally consider cute that you think should be given a free pass?

*MOST mammalian species are now believed to be insectivores, particularly large even-and/or-odd toed ungulates.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 March, 2016, 11:30:14 PM
wish I'd never mentioned my bloody breakfast now.  ::) It's like being stuck in one of those stoned arguments at the end of a party that make you want to turn the music up loud or get a taxi.

I have lost 2kg in 3 weeks though  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 11:43:40 PM
Yeah, sorry DDD, i'll leave it with my last post and bow out now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 06:42:28 AM
Compassion is a great and noble thing. The world needs more of it - in every sphere, not just farming.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 07:46:16 AM
Just about to tuck into a lovely bacon sarnie and just found out I'm out of brown sauce.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 08:25:17 AM
One more for the ignore list.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 08:27:06 AM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 08:25:17 AM
One more for the ignore list.

Indeed. Brown sauce on a bacon buttie? The world's gone mad!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 08:38:03 AM
Thanks Jlm.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 09:00:23 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 08:27:06 AM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 08:25:17 AM
One more for the ignore list.

Indeed. Brown sauce on a bacon buttie? The world's gone mad!
Quite agree, however I haven't eaten bacon in quite awhile. I find without the fat it tastes somewhat wrong, but at the same time I can't eat more than one rasher without knocking me sick.

Been eating a few of these McCarthy Vegea Sausages for breakfast instead recently and they're all kinds of delicious.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 March, 2016, 09:38:13 AM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 09:00:23 AM
Been eating a few of these McCarthy Vegea Sausages for breakfast instead recently and they're all kinds of delicious.

"Are you now, or have you ever been, a carnivore? Answer the question Mr Hawkmumbler!!!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 22 March, 2016, 09:42:47 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 March, 2016, 09:38:13 AM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 09:00:23 AM
Been eating a few of these McCarthy Vegea Sausages for breakfast instead recently and they're all kinds of delicious.
"Are you now, or have you ever been, a carnivore? Answer the question Mr Hawkmumbler!!!"
Arf! I thought he meant they were bursting with vibrant colours and spoke to him in a series of nonsense riddles.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 09:54:56 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 22 March, 2016, 09:38:13 AM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 09:00:23 AM
Been eating a few of these McCarthy Vegea Sausages for breakfast instead recently and they're all kinds of delicious.

"Are you now, or have you ever been, a carnivore? Answer the question Mr Hawkmumbler!!!"
Well i've eaten a fair few sausages in my time but, with god as my witness, it was all a series of consensual and mutually beneficial bondings.

Sinful but ooohhh so delicious. And Weight Watchers approved i'm sure!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 10:11:55 AM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 07:46:16 AM
Just about to tuck into a lovely bacon sarnie and just found out I'm out of brown sauce.

  I had sausage and egg ,think my wife has hid the hp!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 10:14:03 AM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 09:54:56 AM

Well i've eaten a fair few sausages in my time but, with god as my witness, it was all a series of consensual and mutually beneficial bondings.

Sinful but ooohhh so delicious. And Weight Watchers approved i'm sure!

That Julian Clary has a lot to answer for.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 10:22:05 AM
Careful Grugz, you'll be put on Jim's ignore list! How are you by the way?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 10:37:31 AM
we can only hope!  I'm not too bad thanks,soldering on yerself?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 10:47:24 AM
O.K. Thanks, just glad to see George has backed down on the disability cuts!! He will get us some other way!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 22 March, 2016, 11:06:58 AM
Brown sauce on bacon, ketchup on sausages. I thought everyone knew that?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 11:10:15 AM
Yes yes yes!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 11:15:20 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 22 March, 2016, 11:06:58 AM
Brown sauce on bacon, ketchup on sausages. I thought everyone knew that?

Good God. What the hell is wrong with you? Ketchup in a bacon cob, brown sauce in a sausage cob. Ketchup is only acceptable on hotdog sausages, which also require mustard to disguise the fact that they're made almost entirely of pigs' trotters, ears and rectums.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 11:17:10 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 10:37:31 AM
we can only hope!

I'm so pleased that I've gone to the effort of adopting a conciliatory tone and generally not making any reference to your complete fuck-wittery in the run-up to your previous flounce off the board.

Thanks a bunch.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 22 March, 2016, 11:56:35 AM
I had a soft roll with square sausage and tattie scone and a smidgeon of brown sauce this morning. It was ok at best.

I only eat bacon in the house as that way its cooked how I like it, If on a roll then it gets reggae reggae sauce every time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 22 March, 2016, 12:21:46 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 11:15:20 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 22 March, 2016, 11:06:58 AM
Brown sauce on bacon, ketchup on sausages. I thought everyone knew that?
Good God. What the hell is wrong with you? Ketchup in a bacon cob, brown sauce in a sausage cob.
Both of these positions are very repressive if you ask me. If having a single roll (or sandwich) the preferred order is clearly brown sauce for bacon, tomato sauce for sausages. As Colin states. If having two rolls with the same filling then I'd have one with brown and one with tomato. Or possibly some kind of hot sauce depending on what I have to hand.

Is there any mileage in a discussion about the ludicrous words Southerners use when they mean roll? Cob, barm, teacake, gqom, etc. You what, mate? It's worse than Subway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2016, 12:34:12 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 11:18:48 PM
My only problem with your "murder in the name of the food chain" speal... is it doesn't take into account other omnivorous or even carnivourous species. Are these organisms also evil, does the lion playing with it's pray know the torture it's inducing?

Oh but It does take account of it. Vegans and vegetarians aren't out in the wilderness trying to stop animals hunting each other - sad that any animal has to die - but I don't believe nature in itself is evil.

And we humans aren't exactly chasing down our prey like big cats are we?  We are breeding animals in industrial quantities for the sole purpose of slaughter - that's pretty much unnatural. 

But we've evolved enough that we can provide for ourselves without killing and/or cruelty. So why wouldn't we?

I don't do fish either.  I do my best not to kill insects - though some damage is inevitable. But we open windows to let flies out and make escape ladders to help spiders out of the bath etc. 

They are all CUTE. 

(Apparently spiders don't like chestnuts or mint - so if you have any areas you want to keep clear without killing then try those).

I understand that everybody does get very defensive when you ask these questions or suggest that there is another way of doing things.

The natural reaction is to try and "catch the vegan out" or find some exception that justifies the (and I'll use Richmond's favourite phrase here) cognitive dissonance applied to what the food on your plate actually involves.

I've seen several meat eaters today posting about how sickened they are of a video showing little chicks being coloured for Easter decorations etc.  One of our bosses at work posted about how his dogs and cats were part of the family and how much they meant to him and then gleefully describing the pulled pork barbie he had. 

Anyway, if there's anybody left not ignoring me by this point, get back to your bacon buttie discussions.  (But ketchup is an abomination - too sweet to be used in ANY sandwich regardless of filling).




Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 01:29:39 PM
Well my first driving lesson...could have gone better. My coordination is all over the show and I can't change gear, alternate between gas and clutch properly. Also I tend to panic and over steer. Instructor has recommended i take an automatic course instead.

Feeling very stressed and deflated right now, didn't help a BMW driver tried to over take me at a tight corner and got pissed off when he nearly collided with a car coming the other way.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 22 March, 2016, 01:45:26 PM
Hawk- take it slow and tell your instructor you want to repeat the first lesson. Once you overcome the initial nerves all will settle and you will learn.

Do not go for an automatic. You can scuba for grud's sake. You can do this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 March, 2016, 01:45:33 PM
Driving lessons are horrible, 'snot just you 'Mumbler.  Don't go for the automatic option, stick it out. You worry about your own reactions, but the roads are full of 80-year olds, distracted parents and Commando Forces, I'm sure you're no worse and they all manage.  You think it's some magical ability you lack, but it's all just practice, put in the hours and one day it'll just click - that's one of the few bits of advice I got from my Dad that proved to be absolutely true.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 22 March, 2016, 01:50:15 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 01:29:39 PM
Well my first driving lesson...could have gone better. My coordination is all over the show and I can't change gear, alternate between gas and clutch properly. Also I tend to panic and over steer. Instructor has recommended i take an automatic course instead.

Feeling very stressed and deflated right now, didn't help a BMW driver tried to over take me at a tight corner and got pissed off when he nearly collided with a car coming the other way.

No learner driver gets the balance between clutch and accelerator right in their first lesson. I wouldn't worry about that at present. As others have said, don't switch to an automatic, keep on with these lessons. Nobody can drive after one lesson - that's why you're having them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 02:11:44 PM
Thanks guys, i'll percevier if it kills me!

Out of curiosity, whats the problem with automatics?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 March, 2016, 02:43:27 PM
Because it's all you'll ever be able to drive which will always limit your future options.

Practice is the key. I failed 2 driving tests then acted as my mum's driver for a couple of weeks while she did her deliveries for my dad's business - those extra hours just driving around did the trick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 02:59:07 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2016, 12:34:12 PMBut we've evolved enough that we can provide for ourselves without killing and/or cruelty. So why wouldn't we?
Cruelty comes from shielding people from the process, the demand for ever-cheaper food, and the imbalance in modern diets that shoves a slab of meat in front of people and skimps on everything else. I actually wish I could have moved more towards at least vegetarianism myself, but, sadly, health reasons make this impossible. (Once you get a very sudden case of massive adult-onset food intolerance and allergies, your diet is rather decided for you. So no bacon for me, but also no ripe fruit and only limited vegetables and pulses.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 March, 2016, 03:29:50 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 02:11:44 PM
Thanks guys, i'll percevier if it kills me!

Out of curiosity, whats the problem with automatics?

Yep, what DDD says. My brother passed his test on an automatic (in Oz), now any time he's home he can't borrow one of the family's cars, and every time he goes into an airport hire place he has to line up with US tourists to be fleeced. Don't do it!

Clutch/gears are the most intimidating part of starting to drive, but within a few months you'll never notice them again. It's like bra fasteners, basically.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 03:59:13 PM
As someone who can only drive a automatic car these days because of disability, I would strongly advise you not to limit your options.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 March, 2016, 08:11:48 PM
We took the same view with our son.

My wife now uses an automatic due to a bad knee but we encouraged him to learn on my manual to develop proper driving skills and broaden his options, so that's what he's been doing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 March, 2016, 08:17:28 PM
I should say he's also doing manual lessons with an instructor so he gets the experience of petrol and diesel cars.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 08:31:44 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 11:17:10 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 10:37:31 AM
we can only hope!

I'm so pleased that I've gone to the effort of adopting a conciliatory tone and generally not making any reference to your complete fuck-wittery in the run-up to your previous flounce off the board.

Thanks a bunch.

Jim


:lol:

you're welcome james..you tosser.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 08:43:07 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 08:31:44 PM
you're welcome james..you tosser.

What the actual fuck is your problem with me? I don't think I ever ran over your dog or fucked your wife, so what the hell is it with you? You were the one who had a massive dummy-spit, insisted that instead of just stopping posting like a normal human being that the mods should ban your old account, and then came back on claiming it was just stress and illness that made you act like a total fuckwit.

Despite some pretty fucking vile things thrown at me by you in your old identity, I was prepared to let that drop — I haven't mentioned any of that shit, and I've tried to be concilliatory and even sympathetic, and this is what you throw back at me?

Seriously... I know I have a bad rep with some members of this forum, but I have no fucking idea what you think justifies this animosity, and I would really like to know.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 22 March, 2016, 09:01:03 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2016, 12:34:12 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 21 March, 2016, 11:18:48 PM
My only problem with your "murder in the name of the food chain" speal... is it doesn't take into account other omnivorous or even carnivourous species. Are these organisms also evil, does the lion playing with it's pray know the torture it's inducing?

Oh but It does take account of it. Vegans and vegetarians aren't out in the wilderness trying to stop animals hunting each other - sad that any animal has to die - but I don't believe nature in itself is evil.

And we humans aren't exactly chasing down our prey like big cats are we?  We are breeding animals in industrial quantities for the sole purpose of slaughter - that's pretty much unnatural. 

But we've evolved enough that we can provide for ourselves without killing and/or cruelty. So why wouldn't we?

I don't do fish either.  I do my best not to kill insects - though some damage is inevitable. But we open windows to let flies out and make escape ladders to help spiders out of the bath etc. 

They are all CUTE. 

(Apparently spiders don't like chestnuts or mint - so if you have any areas you want to keep clear without killing then try those).

I understand that everybody does get very defensive when you ask these questions or suggest that there is another way of doing things.

The natural reaction is to try and "catch the vegan out" or find some exception that justifies the (and I'll use Richmond's favourite phrase here) cognitive dissonance applied to what the food on your plate actually involves.

I've seen several meat eaters today posting about how sickened they are of a video showing little chicks being coloured for Easter decorations etc.  One of our bosses at work posted about how his dogs and cats were part of the family and how much they meant to him and then gleefully describing the pulled pork barbie he had. 

Anyway, if there's anybody left not ignoring me by this point, get back to your bacon buttie discussions.  (But ketchup is an abomination - too sweet to be used in ANY sandwich regardless of filling).

I admire vegans to be honest and the more I think about it the less I can justify eating meat. The thought of going vegan is so daunting though - I just can't imagine the effect it would have socially and with my family. To be honest I'd feel bad if my mum had to try to fit in a vegan diet during Xmas festivities!
I did stop eating meat filled sandwiches at lunch though. I had a moment of revulsion when I thought about the number of chickens that must have to die to satisfy the M&S sandwich aisle. Now I choose the vegetarian ones or the salads.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 09:04:21 PM
you seriously don't know? I have never done anything to you, it was you who instigated the whole nastiness against me...yeah ive posted silly things,ive said and done silly things in real life ,and I apologise to all for any mistakes or offense I may have caused 'cos I am human and do make mistakes...you are just a nasty ,condescending bully quick to call people fuckers cunts etc etc... I came on the boards to enjoy my interest in 2000ad and share with like minded folk...you yourself have flounced on a couple of occasions even declaring you weren't coming back ever! then you did...and fyi I have been and still am ill with depressive illness but things change and one of them is not letting bullies ruin my life...I think I know what your reffering to in my old life as mogzilla but I wasn't reffering anything of that directly to you or I could have been asking a "loaded question" just the discussion in general and everyone involved in it. its you that believe that everything must be about you...you are not the be all and end all of the board I will get on with anyone at anytime ,again yes ive messed up a few times but certainly not maliciously and as I'm not the only person on the board past present and future who get a gob full from you maybe you should be looking closer to home about who has the problem...

  so please ,put me on ignore if you really can't get past your beef with me, i am and always will be willing and able to offer the dove carrying a shit load of olive branches are you man enough to accept them and stop being so difficult.?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 09:05:23 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 01:29:39 PMInstructor has recommended i take an automatic course instead.
I was hopeless during my first few lessons. And by 'few', I mean 'dozen'. Don't go automatic. If necessary, switch instructor instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 09:30:38 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 09:04:21 PM
  so please ,put me on ignore if you really can't get past your beef with me, i am and always will be willing and able to offer the dove carrying a shit load of olive branches are you man enough to accept them and stop being so difficult.?

As I've pointed out: I've done nothing but been conciliatory and even sympathetic towards you since you came back.

And, since you clearly don't remember: you accused me of being an apologist for paedophiles shortly before your massive flounce, something I'm fairly confident I've never done to you. Something for which you've certainly never apologised to me for, contrary to your claim.

So, stop playing the martyr. If one of us has had a olive branch in their hand since you came back, it's me. If you want to continue being mad at a person who -- based on your description above -- only exists in your head, then so be it, but don't make out that you're the injured party here.

Yes, I can be a bit sweary, but, you know what, I thought we were all adults and I'm certainly not the only poster here with a penchant for Anglo-Saxon vernacular. Do you have a problem with all of them, or just me?

However, I absolutely will not accept you claiming I'm a bully unless you can back that up. Link to some example of me bullying anyone on this forum. If by bullying you mean 'pointing out when someone is arguing from a position of ignorance', then I suggest you get a better dictionary, because the one you have contains some very odd definitions. If you mean actually bullying then back that up.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 09:39:37 PM
Well I would have thought bringing someone's wife into the conversation is pretty nasty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: hippynumber1 on 22 March, 2016, 09:56:36 PM
I'd have thought this was a conversation best had in private...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 09:59:26 PM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 09:39:37 PM
Well I would have thought bringing someone's wife into the conversation is pretty nasty.

What?! Obviously, I've never met Grugz/Mogzilla, obviously, I'm not talking about his actual wife. I wasn't talking about his actual dog, either. I don't know if even has a wife. Or a dog. If, by some bizarre cosmic irony, he has one, other, or both and it turns out I have either run over or fucked either of them, then I will, of course apologise without reservation or hesitation.

That unlikely circumstance notwithstanding, if you're so keen to take offence at what I type that you're incapable of recognising a simple rhetorical device, then it seems more likely that it's your perception of who you think I am that's the problem, rather than anything I'm actually typing.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 10:00:34 PM
Quote from: hippynumber1 on 22 March, 2016, 09:56:36 PM
I'd have thought this was a conversation best had in private...

Why? I wasn't insulted in private.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: hippynumber1 on 22 March, 2016, 10:05:39 PM
I wasn't aware you were insulted at all until you mentioned it, Jim. I'm not having a go at you or Grugz but I always hate to see people 'airing their dirty laundry' in this way. It brings an enjoyable forum down to the level of Jeremy Kyle, it's embarrassing for those of us watching and, ultimately, makes the place look like a playground.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 10:12:57 PM
I know exactly what I think you are Jim.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 10:29:50 PM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 22 March, 2016, 10:12:57 PM
I know exactly what I think you are Jim.


can we please get a "like" button???
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 22 March, 2016, 10:41:16 PM
Jesus Hieronymus Christ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 10:59:40 PM
Quote from: hippynumber1 on 22 March, 2016, 10:05:39 PM
I wasn't aware you were insulted at all until you mentioned it, Jim.

The bit where I was called a tosser didn't tip you off?

QuoteI'm not having a go at you or Grugz

Funny, because it feels like it.

I'm sorry, I just get a bit tired of being constantly painted as the forum's 'Mr Nasty', get accused of bullying, when I'm only guilty of giving people short shrift when they're demonstrably talking shite; being a bit fond of profanity (but no more than other forum members); and occasionally being a little bad-tempered.

In this case, I was clearly the injured party—unless someone wants to point to anything I've ever said on this forum as equivalent to that paedophile apologist accusation—and yet I still made the effort to try and be a decent human being, and I get that effort thrown back in my face.

And, somehow, I'm still the one taking flak. Still the one being accused of bullying. Still the one being accused of insulting behaviour.

Well, fuck you if my having had enough of that shit makes you uncomfortable.

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 11:04:01 PM
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9otJbXJyDQA/T3bCAuTi5NI/AAAAAAAAB2k/i8R_9KazbkU/s1600/calmdown.png)

Yes, learn on a manual. Aside from widening your options, I always feel that a manual gearbox offers greater control. It's daunting at first but soon becomes second nature.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2016, 11:07:07 PM
 "The thought of going vegan is so daunting though -"

But ultimately well worth it. 

It is amazing how much outright hostility you can encounter even from people who profess to love animals (which normally means they like having a pet).

But any hardship is peanuts compared to what the animals go through.

Family dinners not a problem for us. We cook most of the meal - all vegan - and sometimes the in-laws will bring a meat dish along. But mostly there are more than happy to eat what we provide except at Christmas... They just can't get their heads behind leaving meat out then.

Every little helps - so keep up the meat free sarnies.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 11:24:38 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 10:59:40 PM
Quote from: hippynumber1 on 22 March, 2016, 10:05:39 PM


In this case, I was clearly the injured party—unless someone wants to point to anything I've ever said on this forum as equivalent to that paedophile apologist accusation—




https://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=40720.0   


Right, lets put this to bed right now you always bang on about people not reading posts so read the one at the bottom of the link I DIDNT say "jim Campbell is an apologist for peados" I was responding to your comments that abused kids go on to be abusers themselves and merely suggested that with that viewpoint messers saville and hall might have been abused themselves in the past ...and asked in in general if we should feel sorry for them?or if anyone felt they were misunderstood? the answer being a firm NO...I don't know were you got the idea I was accusing you of anything ...you were wrong and I am sorry if, for whatever reason you got that impression it was a subject I feel very strongly about and tbh I was more cross at Hawk's initial comments as he didn't read my posts properly  ,the whole thing got out of hand very quickly and wasn't doing my sanity much good which is why I left for a while. I didn't "flounce" or start a thread saying I was going,i went quietly and came back under a fresh sock when my head was a bit more in focus. As for your offence to my insult well, then I apologise profusely if my use of the word tosser offended you...I obviously misread the bit you wrote calling me a fuckwit...still,we live and learn..

.so, dear boarders please take this as my testament that Jim Campbell is the most calm, gentle spoken, nicest forum member who has never been nasty to anyone ever and makes mother Theresa look like ayatollah khomeni


amen...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 11:25:17 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 11:04:01 PMYes, learn on a manual. Aside from widening your options, I always feel that a manual gearbox offers greater control.
I've never really understood that myself, and am baffled by the UK's ongoing widespread stubborn (as I see it) devotion to manual cars, but do agree about widening options.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 11:29:59 PM
On the other matter, I was hoping that would burn itself out much more quickly, but it hasn't, and the thread is a hair's breadth away from being locked. If anyone wants to carry on taking chunks out of anyone, take it to email.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 11:33:02 PM
agreed, for my part sorry for letting it get this far but my last post is hopefully clear enough to anyone and my last on the subject...apologies fellow boarders my new rotweiller outlook on life is biting folk hither and thither .I'd blame the meds but I cant cos they make me sleepy! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 March, 2016, 11:35:07 PM
Quote from: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 11:25:17 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 11:04:01 PMYes, learn on a manual. Aside from widening your options, I always feel that a manual gearbox offers greater control.
I've never really understood that myself, and am baffled by the UK's ongoing widespread stubborn (as I see it) devotion to manual cars, but do agree about widening options.

and ,not driving myself but having a go when my dad had an automatic Volvo estate I preferred it, just put your foot down and drive...my mum passed in the automatic so has to drive one all the time now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 12:09:43 AM
Quote from: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 11:25:17 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 11:04:01 PMYes, learn on a manual. Aside from widening your options, I always feel that a manual gearbox offers greater control.
I've never really understood that myself, and am baffled by the UK's ongoing widespread stubborn (as I see it) devotion to manual cars, but do agree about widening options.

I always found the ability to bulk-shift through gears to offer more control in emergency situations. Also, if the clutch goes on an automatic you're basically stranded but if the same thing happens on a manual it's no biggie - you simply match revs to speed and can change gears as usual. Manuals are better in the snow and off-road, too.

Just my personal opinion built on experience.

The nicest car I ever had was a Granada Ghia 2.8L automatic. It was comfy and fast and lovely to drive but it made me a lazy driver. I'd never have another.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 23 March, 2016, 12:17:45 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 12:09:43 AM
Quote from: IndigoPrime on 22 March, 2016, 11:25:17 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 11:04:01 PMYes, learn on a manual. Aside from widening your options, I always feel that a manual gearbox offers greater control.
I've never really understood that myself, and am baffled by the UK's ongoing widespread stubborn (as I see it) devotion to manual cars, but do agree about widening options.

I always found the ability to bulk-shift through gears to offer more control in emergency situations. Also, if the clutch goes on an automatic you're basically stranded but if the same thing happens on a manual it's no biggie - you simply match revs to speed and can change gears as usual. Manuals are better in the snow and off-road, too.

Just my personal opinion built on experience.

The nicest car I ever had was a Granada Ghia 2.8L automatic. It was comfy and fast and lovely to drive but it made me a lazy driver. I'd never have another.

One of my oldest friends lives in America and is really glad he learned to drive a manual, because most Americans can't. Once he discovered someone had broken in to his car only to abandon any pretensions of stealing it because they couldn't "Drive stick"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 23 March, 2016, 07:01:13 AM
I much prefer a manual gearbox but automatics are a lot better than they used to be.
I'd advise anyone to continue learning manual though. Even if it takes a while, it'll get to the point where things just 'click' and changing gears can be done almost without thinking.
Just practice and get out as much as you can (I used to go out every night with my dad or brother and drive around an empty industrial estate for half an hour, just to get a feel of the gears, clutch etc).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: hippynumber1 on 23 March, 2016, 07:12:38 AM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 22 March, 2016, 10:59:40 PM
Quote from: hippynumber1 on 22 March, 2016, 10:05:39 PM
I wasn't aware you were insulted at all until you mentioned it, Jim.

The bit where I was called a tosser didn't tip you off?


Well, fuck you if my having had enough of that shit makes you uncomfortable.

Jim

Being called a tosser is banter where I'm from, especially when followed by a 'winking face'. I'm not taking sides and don't want to get involved in this petty, playground shite but fuck you too, Jim. I was suggesting you keep it private because no-one comes out of this looking great but you carry on...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 March, 2016, 07:29:10 AM
Indigo Prime has issued a mod warning about continuing this nonsense just 6 posts upthread.. No need for anyone else to get involved.

Please don't force the locking of this thread - I'm still waiting to see if Bouwel ever found a pencil pot he was happy with.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 23 March, 2016, 07:53:03 AM
Well thanks for all the input chaps, frankly i'm amazed so many other countries have auto as a standard.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 08:09:57 AM
I have a blister on my foot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 23 March, 2016, 08:48:23 AM
Left or right?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: hippynumber1 on 23 March, 2016, 08:54:19 AM
If it's on the ball it's going to smart either way. Of the foot, I mean...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 08:58:59 AM
Left foot, front, just behind my middle toes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 23 March, 2016, 09:07:29 AM
Nasty!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 09:11:33 AM
Stings like buggery. On the plus side, I've had a bit of work recently so the hour+ walk to work has become a 15 minute hobble to a bus stop.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IndigoPrime on 23 March, 2016, 09:24:11 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 12:09:43 AMManuals are better in the snow and off-road, too.
I used to think the same, until I discovered a great many of the vehicles in use in Iceland are autos. I think these days, with cars increasingly becoming computers, and automatic transmission being significantly better than it once was, it's probably more the appearance of more control than a literal thing — at least for most people. Also, while you might be right regarding off-roading, a great many people drive in town, city and motorway conditions, and on those a manual car is more a distraction than anything.

Quoteit made me a lazy driver
In what way? I've always found my driving in automatics more precise with things like indicating, because there's less to physically 'do'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 23 March, 2016, 09:51:55 AM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 22 March, 2016, 02:11:44 PM
Out of curiosity, whats the problem with automatics?

I guess the main reasons to choose a manual transmission vehicle are pragmatic.
For us (UK & Ireland) there is the fact that the majority of vehicles (including 2nd hand) available to purchase are manual transmission.
Manual transmission gear boxes are also easier (and cheaper) to repair.
However, I am aware that there is increasing availability of choice between automatic or manual with new cars from some of the leading manufacturers.

If it's any consolation to you, I had the exact same line of thought when I was starting to drive (18 or 19) and was laughed out of the house by my Dad and Uncle like I was Marge Simpson mooting to join the Springfield Police Force.
The wise advice of practice & perseverance offered here on the forum also worked for me, and I had a full licence on my 20th birthday (meaning my car insurance dropped from £4500 (Irish Pounds) to a measly £3000 (Irish Pounds).   ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 10:05:39 AM
Quote from: IndigoPrime on 23 March, 2016, 09:24:11 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 12:09:43 AMManuals are better in the snow and off-road, too.
I used to think the same, until I discovered a great many of the vehicles in use in Iceland are autos. I think these days, with cars increasingly becoming computers, and automatic transmission being significantly better than it once was, it's probably more the appearance of more control than a literal thing — at least for most people. Also, while you might be right regarding off-roading, a great many people drive in town, city and motorway conditions, and on those a manual car is more a distraction than anything.

Quoteit made me a lazy driver
In what way? I've always found my driving in automatics more precise with things like indicating, because there's less to physically 'do'.


It's possibly an old-fashioned attitude on my part, I'm willing to accept that. It was the very fact that I had "less to do" that made me feel a lazy driver. In my opinion, having a manual gearbox forces one to concentrate more on the vehicle being driven, to be more aware of the engine, speed and general state of it and the road and conditions. Having that one less thing to think about gave me time to faff about with the radio and whatnot, to daydream a bit more and pay less attention to what I was doing. Also, there's nothing so satisfying in quite the same way as knocking it down a cog to blast past a tractor on a country road.

I suppose it's down to personal preference more than anything and my feeling that an automatic detracts slightly from the skill required to be an attentive driver. I have nothing against automatics in principle and many people swear by them, which is fine and dandy, I just prefer a manual.

I have not driven a modern automatic and so they may well be better than the older ones I'm used to. Still, I'm unlikely to ever buy one or even rent one due to my ingrained prejudice on this issue. Maybe when I'm old and doddery I might change my mind but, for now, I'm happy with my old-fashioned manual bias!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 23 March, 2016, 10:10:12 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 10:05:39 AM
Also, there's nothing so satisfying in quite the same way as knocking it down a cog to blast past a tractor on a country road.


Agreed, and something I've to do quite a bit!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 23 March, 2016, 10:18:25 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 March, 2016, 06:42:28 AM
Compassion is a great and noble thing. The world needs more of it - in every sphere, not just farming.

http://theconversation.com/going-veggie-would-cut-global-food-emissions-by-two-thirds-and-save-millions-of-lives-new-study-56655?utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Latest%20from%20The%20Conversation%20for%20March%2023%202016%20-%204553&utm_content=Latest%20from%20The%20Conversation%20for%20March%2023%202016%20-%204553+CID_7feaba8acc6b6494d4a384d6315edc57&utm_source=campaign_monitor_uk&utm_term=Going%20veggie%20would%20cut%20global%20food%20emissions%20by%20two%20thirds%20and%20save%20millions%20of%20lives%20%20new%20study (http://theconversation.com/going-veggie-would-cut-global-food-emissions-by-two-thirds-and-save-millions-of-lives-new-study-56655?utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Latest%20from%20The%20Conversation%20for%20March%2023%202016%20-%204553&utm_content=Latest%20from%20The%20Conversation%20for%20March%2023%202016%20-%204553+CID_7feaba8acc6b6494d4a384d6315edc57&utm_source=campaign_monitor_uk&utm_term=Going%20veggie%20would%20cut%20global%20food%20emissions%20by%20two%20thirds%20and%20save%20millions%20of%20lives%20%20new%20study)

Sorry about the mega-link forgot/CBA doing the text-hide bit...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 23 March, 2016, 07:06:44 PM
so,has sharky popped his blister yet?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 07:25:02 PM
I'm sure it'll pop on its own at some point.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 23 March, 2016, 07:27:46 PM
you have more will power than me!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 07:41:42 PM
Maybe - or maybe I'm just mard ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 23 March, 2016, 08:31:13 PM
I had to look up 'mard', me.  You learn something new every day.

I just read the first three pages of this thread; it was really funny. (I say that without sarcasm; there truly is some top-class banter there.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 March, 2016, 09:30:09 PM
This thread was better in the past, which is mildly upsetting.

Which definition of mard did you settle on? I just looked it up too on the Urban Dictionary and learned this one: "A very handsome and strong man who frequently urinates and plays sports. He is very enteraining and can put on a peculiar show." It's not the definition I originally intended but now I'm tending towards it...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 24 March, 2016, 02:38:57 AM
My first university assignment came back with a C+.

Not sure how I feel about that yet. It was what I was expecting since I really didn't put it as much effort as I could (although I'm still trying to get my time management sorted)

Happy because it's a result. Disappointed in myself that I could have tried harder and got a better grade.

Plus now I have one more grade that I need to offset with something better in order to boost my gpa.

And at least now I now where I stand as far at what is required and such....

I think I'll sleep on it before thinking about it any more.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 24 March, 2016, 02:29:46 PM
surely C+ is good? you're in uni which my brain would never allow me and my greatest academic achievement was getting a U for ungraded in cdt ,yes ,I was that crap they couldn't be arsed marking it...something I have to remind my wife when she mentions diy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: richerthanyou on 30 March, 2016, 02:42:40 AM
Tooth ache. Right at the back. Worried it could be a wisdom tooth. Got some panadol from the chinese shop and it looks suspiciously counterfeit. So for now I'm putting up with the pain. Once I've got some money (oh how ironic!) I'll be straight off to the dentist!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 30 March, 2016, 03:09:47 AM
Quote from: richerthanyou on 30 March, 2016, 02:42:40 AM
Tooth ache. Right at the back. Worried it could be a wisdom tooth. Got some panadol from the chinese shop and it looks suspiciously counterfeit. So for now I'm putting up with the pain. Once I've got some money (oh how ironic!) I'll be straight off to the dentist!

Ouch. Try Clove oil for relief from toothache.

Apparently it can help out for your fly infestation!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 March, 2016, 07:13:25 PM
So, I gets the call from work at half past two this afternoon. Customer in a Big Panic. Five pallets of lettuce needing to get from Skelmersdale to Lichfield urgently to be packed, otherwise large portions of the country will be without pre-packed salad bowls tomorrow. Can I help? Sure I can.

So I hot foot it to Skelmersdale for this panic rush urgent vital job. They can't find the lettuce. When they do, it's all on the wrong pallets and has to be re-stacked. Forty minutes later I'm loaded and ready for off - but the bloke who makes the exit barrier go up and down has gone for a brew.

Ten minutes later and I'm on my way. M6 is a rush-hour, car park, fender-bender nightmare but I fight through it manfully and finally arrive at Lichfield.

To find everyone's gone home.

*sigh*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 31 March, 2016, 07:57:33 PM
Quote from: richerthanyou on 30 March, 2016, 02:42:40 AM
Tooth ache. Right at the back. Worried it could be a wisdom tooth. Got some panadol from the chinese shop and it looks suspiciously counterfeit. So for now I'm putting up with the pain. Once I've got some money (oh how ironic!) I'll be straight off to the dentist!

Not good richer. I had two wisdom teeth pulled last month. The dentist told me that if you're feeling pain, it's already too late. Hopefully it turns out better for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 31 March, 2016, 07:58:39 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 March, 2016, 07:13:25 PM


So I hot foot it to Skelmersdale

*sigh*

that blister still giving you gip then?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 31 March, 2016, 10:28:44 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 March, 2016, 07:13:25 PM
So, I gets the call from work at half past two this afternoon. Customer in a Big Panic. Five pallets of lettuce needing to get from Skelmersdale to Lichfield urgently to be packed, otherwise large portions of the country will be without pre-packed salad bowls tomorrow. Can I help? Sure I can.

I refuse to believe in urgent lettuce. :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 March, 2016, 11:47:47 PM
The blister committed suicide all over my sock.

Urgent lettuce constitutes around 20% of my wages.

My world is quite odd.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 01 April, 2016, 10:14:46 AM
I just hope that lettuce is not now being sold in Blister Packs. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 April, 2016, 10:22:01 AM
#Lettucegate
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 01 April, 2016, 11:04:35 AM
Is this a cauli for help?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 April, 2016, 11:08:31 AM
Lettuce hope not.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 April, 2016, 12:23:02 PM
Heh, the spirit of Ronnie Courgette lives on...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 April, 2016, 03:11:16 PM
just leaf it be now...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 April, 2016, 03:50:39 PM
When we're all having such a kale of a thyme?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 April, 2016, 03:53:57 PM
All these puns are just a completely radish.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 01 April, 2016, 04:16:24 PM
That's not fennel.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 April, 2016, 04:24:56 PM
I simply carrot comprehend where this sprouted from
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 April, 2016, 04:33:44 PM
Certainly not as amusing as the Salad of Halo Jones, Sloe Busters or Dan Pear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 01 April, 2016, 04:48:15 PM
Ah, the salad days of 2000 A PEA.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 April, 2016, 05:15:28 PM
This is getting beyond an artichoke, now...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 01 April, 2016, 05:43:22 PM
You're the one string(bean)ing these corny pun(net)s out for shallot of these posts, yam melon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 01 April, 2016, 05:51:05 PM
This is getting radiccio.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 01 April, 2016, 05:52:21 PM
Cress, it is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 April, 2016, 05:58:22 PM
Shallot can I bay? I plant crop myself and urgently weed kelp!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 01 April, 2016, 06:34:05 PM
Mushroom kelp this up?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 01 April, 2016, 07:58:13 PM
Let's put a swede to this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 02 April, 2016, 04:08:30 PM
Will you lot please quit all this ch-ch-ch-chive talkin'!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 02 April, 2016, 05:37:56 PM
beet it willya?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 02 April, 2016, 06:10:05 PM
Are you guys dill at it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 02 April, 2016, 06:51:04 PM
Give it a rest lads.

This is getting fuckin lentil.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 02 April, 2016, 07:19:18 PM
Onion of you are funny.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 April, 2016, 07:21:44 PM
It's not fig and it's not clover.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 02 April, 2016, 07:39:03 PM
Some sage advice while we're here, it is important to do what you enjoy, remember it's not all about a celery.. Now that isn't exactly rocket science but food for thought nonetheless.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 03 April, 2016, 12:29:40 PM
I don't beet-leaf this is still going on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 05 April, 2016, 01:27:41 PM
Mildly concerned that I might've put my bike lights in the wash last night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 05 April, 2016, 01:44:41 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 05 April, 2016, 01:27:41 PM
Mildly concerned that I might've put my bike lights in the wash last night.
as veg-you-might
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 05 April, 2016, 03:36:01 PM
Quote from: The Cosh on 05 April, 2016, 01:27:41 PM
Mildly concerned that I might've put my bike lights in the wash last night.

Did you leave it on a spinach cycle?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 April, 2016, 05:23:25 PM
I just bought a new mini-speaker for my ipod/phone. It's a Jam Replay <insert crap jam-based vegetable pun  here>

It's small, powerful, looks good, connects by jack or bluetooth and the sound quality is great - the minor impediment is that when you switch it on it shouts at full volume POWERING ON, and when you switch it off (or even worse when your music's finished and it's been idle for 10 minutes) it shouts POWERING OFF!

Also, when you reach the maximum volume, it interrupts what's playing to shout MAXIMUM VOLUME! There is no way to switch this off or even make it speak more quietly (although I can make it speak other languages - the German one sounds particularly angry!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 05 April, 2016, 05:33:00 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 05 April, 2016, 05:23:25 PM
I just bought a new mini-speaker for my ipod/phone. It's a Jam Replay <insert crap jam-based vegetable pun  here>

It's small, powerful, looks good, connects by jack or bluetooth and the sound quality is great - the minor impediment is that when you switch it on it shouts at full volume POWERING ON, and when you switch it off (or even worse when your music's finished and it's been idle for 10 minutes) it shouts POWERING OFF!

Also, when you reach the maximum volume, it interrupts what's playing to shout MAXIMUM VOLUME! There is no way to switch this off or even make it speak more quietly (although I can make it speak other languages - the German one sounds particularly angry!)

No one gives a fig.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: judda fett on 05 April, 2016, 05:48:47 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 05 April, 2016, 05:23:25 PM
I just bought a new mini-speaker for my ipod/phone. It's a Jam Replay <insert crap jam-based vegetable pun  here>


I'm sorry but that's the preserve of others Damsondontdare.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 April, 2016, 07:21:41 PM
We've Only Started punning again, It's Too Bad that The Modern World has 100 Ways of Running on the Spot. If you're going to be a Billy Hunt and carry on with this Bitterest Pill again, Don't Tell 'em You're Sane because it's a Dead End Street and I won't be Joining in because Every Little Bit Hurts and I've  Changed My Address and will be Going Underground until you Get Yourself Together and Scrape Away this Pop Art Poem.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: M.I.K. on 14 April, 2016, 10:07:16 PM
Here's a minor impediment... I am allergic to monosodium glutamate. I have known this for a while and try my best to avoid anything containing it. If I don't, I will normally end up with scintillating scotoma (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scintillating_scotoma), which is unpleasant but usually passes within half an hour.

Thing is, in spite of hundreds of thousands of people reporting the same symptoms along with other migraine related stuff when they consume msg, some, (but not all), scientific studies have failed to show a link. This means you'll get articles popping up every now and again saying how there's definitely no such thing as msg allergy, closely followed by loads of comments from people saying there definitely is, followed by comments from other people calling the sufferers idiots, (or more unpleasant names), because 'science'.

Now, if there really isn't such a thing as an allergy to msg and it's all based around false equivalency, then I must surely have psychic powers, because I also get the weird visual anomalies when I've inadvertently eaten the stuff after not previously noticing it hidden away in the ingredients under a yeast-based pseudonym, like in that packet of Walkers prawn cocktail crisps I ate on an empty stomach earlier.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 April, 2016, 12:41:30 AM
Should probably have checked this before doing lots of good work for the guy who owns this company, and who is now refusing to pay on entirely spurious grounds...

(http://www.aptronym.co.uk/ccj.png)

Dammit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 16 April, 2016, 11:13:34 AM
Sue the bum and add yourself to that list
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 April, 2016, 12:59:57 AM
In addition to the above company which is still trading despite judgements against it totalling £14k, this guy had one company which went bust in 2009 owing £40k, and another which went bust in 2010 owing £91k—and Companies House reveals a litany of other dormant and dissolved companies he's had, along with lots of company name changes and documents about things I can't decipher. Once of his creditors was Vodafone, so if they couldn't get money out of him, I doubt I can.

~sigh~

Sometimes I wish I was Judge Dredd so I could just go and kick some ass—or perhaps Maitland would be more apt in this instance.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 April, 2016, 01:58:25 PM
You can try bluffing the welsher guy by telling him that you've given your work to another company and they've paid for it, so if he uses any of your work, the other company will have him arrested for fraudulently trying to pass himself off as them/their company.
Or if you can find a Northern Irishman not currently in jail, ask him politely to retrieve the money you're owed in exchange for a percentage.  What happens after this, you are not legally culpable for.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 April, 2016, 06:15:45 PM
Quote from: Professor Wolfgang Von Bear on 17 April, 2016, 01:58:25 PM

Or if you can find a Northern Irishman not currently in jail, ask him politely to retrieve the money you're owed in exchange for a percentage.  What happens after this, you are not legally culpable for.


I think you might be.

"So, Mr Banners, when you hired Seamus 'Bone-Saw' O'Reilly, a known violent felon, to recover the money owed - what did you think was going to happen?"


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 April, 2016, 09:37:17 PM
Banners would be fine - Bonesaw is the MP for Armagh these days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 17 April, 2016, 09:45:26 PM
Quote from: Professor Wolfgang Von Bear on 17 April, 2016, 09:37:17 PM
Banners would be fine - Bonesaw is the MP for Armagh these days.
Still a more honest MP than the competition...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 17 April, 2016, 10:40:17 PM
Yep, they wouldn't let him stand for election in Tyrone, he's too soft. Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 April, 2016, 03:15:43 AM
Heh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 18 April, 2016, 09:38:51 AM
So start of last week in my job and Newcastle before moving to London this Saturday!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 18 April, 2016, 11:39:47 AM
Quote from: Goaty on 18 April, 2016, 09:38:51 AM
So start of last week in my job and Newcastle before moving to London this Saturday!
God speed, Goaty and good luck chum!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 April, 2016, 12:05:09 PM
Aye, all the best!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 April, 2016, 03:25:34 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 18 April, 2016, 09:38:51 AM
So start of last week in my job and Newcastle before moving to London this Saturday!

Why do I keep having flashes of Jon Voight in Midnight Cowboy...?

Best of luck mate, the things we do for love!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 April, 2016, 11:28:38 PM
So after a robust but entirely fair defence of my work, alongside some compelling supporting evidence, the guy has now paid £600 rather than risk another CCJ. Quite a bit less than agreed initially, but I was keen to get a decent proportion at least.

He has now asked me to confirm he owns the copyright to the branding and web designs. I replied that as I understand it, the designs are mine and that in effect he has licensed them to use within the context of this particular project. In the absence of a contract to say otherwise I think that's basically right - but I'm no expert, and I told him as such.

He says I am lying and that the copyright is his, so I am now being threatened with legal action.

By a man who tried to get away without paying for work he now wants to claim he created.

Heh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 April, 2016, 07:17:21 AM
Sell him the rights for the remainder of what he owes you. But first, have a look at this information (http://www.cla.co.uk/copyright_information/copyright_information).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 21 April, 2016, 08:03:49 AM
Quote from: Banners on 20 April, 2016, 11:28:38 PM
In the absence of a contract to say otherwise I think that's basically right - but I'm no expert, and I told him as such.

With the usual I am not a lawyer disclaimer, I believe the basic principle of UK copyright law is very straightforward: if you create it, the copyright is yours unless another party can produce a piece of paper with your signature at the bottom assigning the copyright to someone else.

(Lack of such a piece of paper was the reason we didn't see a reprint of Zenith for twenty-five years.)

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 21 April, 2016, 09:34:41 AM
Thanks, Shark—that link is very useful and seems to confirm what I thought, and what Jim is saying.

Another aspect of all this is that the work was commissioned under the banner of a company the client appeared to be working for as an employee, but is now being used under the banner of a company that the client actually owns. That said, the client is still using an email address from the first company.

Bizarre.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 April, 2016, 10:12:37 AM
Wouldn't be surprised if he'd, for example, sold one of the companies to a relative for £1 so he can claim to be an employee and draw a wage or something like that. Sounds like a slippery bugger at any rate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 21 April, 2016, 02:48:48 PM
It's almost like he's a pathological liar who ignores the law but throws it around as a threat when he thinks it'll get him somewhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 April, 2016, 05:25:10 PM
Just like the government, then.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 21 April, 2016, 11:16:46 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 18 April, 2016, 09:38:51 AM
So start of last week in my job and Newcastle before moving to London this Saturday!
See you at the Southern Contingent on Free Comic Book Day then!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 22 April, 2016, 10:12:22 AM
My LCS didn't get its delivery of the prog and Meg this week, so unless I want to fork out twice I have to wait until next Wednesday to get the latest issue.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 25 April, 2016, 08:59:10 PM
we finally got round to having our leaky conservatory room replaced and also discovered the original builder didn't actually screw the sides together so they have been held together by sealant for 13 years!!! he also didn't order the correct size room panels ,hence the leakage...
  our new builder was getting a bit shirty wanting to be paid on Friday despite not finishing the job ,I agreed to give a small amount toward the lads wages but will not pay the rest til the things finished...it only needs the skimming etc done and the electrics doing and should have been finished tomorrow,but no one turned up today and cant get hold of him...if hes not got in touch/finished  by wednsday I might have to get someone else in to finish the job and deduct that from the others bill. added to that the house is full of stuff including two flat packs and 37 packs of laminate flooring so we have a minute space to get into the kitchen.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 26 April, 2016, 09:55:19 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 22 April, 2016, 10:12:22 AM
My LCS didn't get its delivery of the prog and Meg this week, so unless I want to fork out twice I have to wait until next Wednesday to get the latest issue.

Ditto (Not RayGun perchance?)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin Zeal on 27 April, 2016, 03:01:51 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 26 April, 2016, 09:55:19 AM
Quote from: Colin Zeal on 22 April, 2016, 10:12:22 AM
My LCS didn't get its delivery of the prog and Meg this week, so unless I want to fork out twice I have to wait until next Wednesday to get the latest issue.

Ditto (Not RayGun perchance?)

Raygun East, yes. hopefully they'll have everything today when I go in.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 28 April, 2016, 07:29:21 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 21 April, 2016, 08:03:49 AM
Quote from: Banners on 20 April, 2016, 11:28:38 PM
In the absence of a contract to say otherwise I think that's basically right - but I'm no expert, and I told him as such.

With the usual I am not a lawyer disclaimer, I believe the basic principle of UK copyright law is very straightforward: if you create it, the copyright is yours unless another party can produce a piece of paper with your signature at the bottom assigning the copyright to someone else.

(Lack of such a piece of paper was the reason we didn't see a reprint of Zenith for twenty-five years.)

Cheers

Jim

Sorry to dredge this up but just wanted to make the following observation.  One of the things I was looking into a year or so ago was ownership of work.  This was related to, of all things, lesson plans (don't ask).  What I learnt from my research was that if you complete something whilst in the direct employment of someone then that work belongs to the employer and not you.  The key point being 'direct employment'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 April, 2016, 07:59:13 PM
Thanks for that. In this case, I was a supplier not an employee. Cheers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 28 April, 2016, 08:10:59 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 28 April, 2016, 07:29:21 PM
This was related to, of all things, lesson plans (don't ask).  What I learnt from my research was that if you complete something whilst in the direct employment of someone then that work belongs to the employer and not you.  The key point being 'direct employment'.

Yes, sorry, you're quite right. Thinking like a freelancer. My dad was a teacher and several learning games he devised to help with special education needs kids were appropriated by the LEA and put on the market as commercial products without so much as his name on the development credits.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 29 April, 2016, 02:57:06 PM
the new conservatory roof's on but now the daunting prospect of cleaving all the plaster off stuff and finding space for all the crap piled up that needs to fit somehow back in there...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 April, 2016, 11:08:44 PM
Just back from a long evening in A&E after getting hit by a car (my own stupid fault). Could've been much worse: a cut on the noggin which they glued (hoping for a cool scar), bruised hip and bruised/cracked rib. In bed with a couple of co-codamol but I reckon I'll ache like buggery in the morning!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IndigoPrime on 29 April, 2016, 11:19:56 PM
Ouch. Get well. (Makes my being miserable at still working at this late hour no longer seem quite so bad...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 April, 2016, 03:04:48 AM
Bloody Hell, DDD, that must have been terrifying - I'm sorry to hear about it but I'm glad you're okay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 April, 2016, 11:36:38 AM
Thanks guys

Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 April, 2016, 11:08:44 PMI reckon I'll ache like buggery in the morning!

My precog powers are astonishing. OW!  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 30 April, 2016, 02:26:07 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 April, 2016, 11:08:44 PM
Just back from a long evening in A&E after getting hit by a car .... I reckon I'll ache like buggery in the morning!

This puts my Rotator Cuff injury to shame.  Sympathies to you sir.  Hope you get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 30 April, 2016, 02:26:57 PM
Grad DDD! Do feel better soon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 30 April, 2016, 04:53:57 PM
Rest up. Hope you feel better soon Dandontdare. And hope you have plenty of reading material to keep you occupied.

I know I have to be more careful crossing the roads sometimes. (Holland was certainly a learning curve with all those bikes shooting around.) Thankfully, I've never been hit by a car,(or bike) but this is certainly a reminder to be more careful.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 April, 2016, 05:25:00 PM
Ouch DDD, glad it wasn't more serious.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 30 April, 2016, 06:49:32 PM
Heck DDD! Get well soon fella!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 30 April, 2016, 09:50:44 PM
Not nice DDD. Glad you are OK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 30 April, 2016, 11:50:31 PM
Crikey DDD repair quickly, eh?  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 01 May, 2016, 01:31:26 AM
Owch DDD!
Take it east for the next few days, an excuse to read!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 01 May, 2016, 01:56:29 AM
Speedy recovery Dan...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: moly on 02 May, 2016, 07:17:49 PM
Went to pick up my order from local comic shop two titles not orderd and another had an issue missing trying to source on eBay bit of a nightmare, not the first time they had done and they tried to overcharge me so much for loyalty to local comic shops
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 May, 2016, 09:52:10 AM
So I got a new job yesterday but had one more interview today.  I tried to phone yesterday to tell them I wouldn't attend.  After several attempts I emailed instead and politely explained.

So I get an annoyed call this morning asking where I was!  I asked her to check her email and voicemails.  She did.  I still feel bad though but it would have been silly attending when I had no intention of taking it if offered.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: morpheas on 04 May, 2016, 10:28:33 AM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 04 May, 2016, 09:52:10 AM
I still feel bad though but it would have been silly attending when I had no intention of taking it if offered.

Nah, you called, emailed and explained everything. That is all you can do and it's their problem AND their job to find out.

Enjoy the rest of the day please, you got a new job! (congrats!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 May, 2016, 10:31:44 AM
Thank you   :)

It's true what you say.  They have as much obligation to check their communications as I do to send it. I still feel a bit bad though but it's true.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 May, 2016, 04:48:24 PM
Fishy, just a few short weeks ago you were worried you might never work again. Do not let anybody make you feel even a bit bad, especially on this Day of days!

Congratulations and well Done!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 04 May, 2016, 05:40:43 PM
THank you Sharky  :) That is so very true.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 06 May, 2016, 08:46:38 PM
Nearly involved in a head-on collision as a car branded with "QSC Safety" graphics (I think) attempted a reckless overtake on a blind bend on the A530 near Nantwich. I slammed on the brakes as he bore down on us and came to a stop just as he aborted, slowed down and pulled back in behind the car on his side. After I caught my breath, checked the boy in the back and drove on a few more seconds, we came upon a 30mph 'Community Speedcheck' zone which he would have just passed through. How ironic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 May, 2016, 02:40:20 AM
Jeez, that kind of thing always gets the blood pumping! Glad you're safe, Banners.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 07 May, 2016, 09:02:06 AM
Ouch Banners.  So scary.

We nearly had similar two weeks back with a car doing easily double the speed limit racing toward us on a very narrow country road whilst my son was practicing his driving with me.

Somehow it missed us by inches, son says he is sure he'd be dead if it hadn't.

So many idiots out there.

Somehow lilfish held his nerve and passed this week anyway.  I think it would have wrecked mine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 07 May, 2016, 10:12:00 PM
coming back from blackpool some numpty just pulled in front of us on the m6 must have missed us by 6 inches!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 May, 2016, 10:21:59 PM
A bloke I used to work with at a mini-bus firm, a long, long time ago, was fond of cutting it close like that. His favourite saying was, "another coat of paint and I'd have had that bastard."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 08 May, 2016, 07:45:30 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 07 May, 2016, 10:12:00 PM
coming back from blackpool some numpty just pulled in front of us on the m6 must have missed us by 6 inches!

That sounds like my journey's yesterday around Cardiff.  How the hell I made it alive is beyond me!

It's 'mirror, signal, manoeuvre' isn't it?  Not 'manoeuvre, maybe signal, oh sh**!!'

And don't get me started on little old ladies in Honda Civics (or Hyundai's now it seems) ...







... and breeeeeeeaaaaaathe!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 08 May, 2016, 04:10:46 PM
Quote from: Banners on 06 May, 2016, 08:46:38 PM
Nearly involved in a head-on collision as a car branded with "QSC Safety" graphics (I think) attempted a reckless overtake on a blind bend on the A530 near Nantwich. I slammed on the brakes as he bore down on us and came to a stop just as he aborted, slowed down and pulled back in behind the car on his side. After I caught my breath, checked the boy in the back and drove on a few more seconds, we came upon a 30mph 'Community Speedcheck' zone which he would have just passed through. How ironic.
These guys? (http://www.qscsafety.com)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 08 May, 2016, 04:45:16 PM
Maybe, but it all happened so fast I can't be 100% sure, especially as they don't seem to be local. Tempted to phone them tomorrow and ask if they do road safety courses... ;-)

Quote from: The Legendary SharkJeez, that kind of thing always gets the blood pumping! Glad you're safe, Banners.

Thanks for the comment :-) Strangely though, when the moment passed, it was more a serene feeling, like some kind of reverie. Weird.

Quote from: Something FishySomehow it missed us by inches, son says he is sure he'd be dead if it hadn't. So many idiots out there.

Horrid to think what might have been. Guess none of us can claim to always give 100% concentration and always stick to speed limits, but taking stupid deliberate risks is something else.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 May, 2016, 07:34:28 PM
cracked rib + hay-fever = no fun at all.

It's been atchoo-AARGH, atchoo-AARGH all afternoon!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 May, 2016, 07:39:59 PM
Does natural honey work for hay fever, or is that an old wives' tale?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 09 May, 2016, 08:05:49 PM
Old wives tale I think, Sharkey.
Lifelong sufferer of hayfever here, and I've tried everything (and I mean everything).

Finally found some relief two years ago- a prescription of Dymista nasal spray.
Amazing stuff, I still can't quite believe it's worked so well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 09 May, 2016, 08:35:04 PM
I think 9mm hollow point is a highly effective cure.  Personally I've always preferred 7.62mm but you can't fight standardisation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 10 May, 2016, 10:52:41 AM
Facebook has decided that it wants me to prove I am me and has  locked me out until I send it pictures of various of documents.

It's probably  because I don't  have my real DOB  logged (I'm 116 don't you know?).

But uploading images of passports and driving licenses sounds like a) a total scam  and b) a recipe for disaster.

Anybody else suffered this minor  impediment?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 10 May, 2016, 11:36:57 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 10 May, 2016, 10:52:41 AM
Anybody else suffered this minor  impediment?
Not on Facebook but when I tried to sign up to AirBnB they wanted something similar so I sacked it off and left my mate to organise the accommodation whenever we go anywhere.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 10 May, 2016, 11:44:46 AM
Ebay/Paypal users will likely be familiar.
Send them a pic of a longform birth certificate and some letters addressed to you and nothing else.

Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 09 May, 2016, 07:39:59 PM
Does natural honey work for hay fever, or is that an old wives' tale?

Locally produced honey was what I heard - might just be a placebo, but some have sworn by it.
A Kenalog  (http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/medicines/a6953/kenalog-intra-articular-intramuscular-injection-triamcinolone/)jab used to be a life-saver for me, but my symptoms became less severe over time so my GP steered me onto generic meds instead.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 10 May, 2016, 11:46:25 AM
Something similar happened to me, so I took it as an opportunity to get off the damned thing for good.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 10 May, 2016, 01:59:12 PM
Wheres King Trout?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 10 May, 2016, 02:07:10 PM
Canada!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 10 May, 2016, 02:28:54 PM
is there no internet there?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 10 May, 2016, 03:45:47 PM
Quote from: Satanist on 10 May, 2016, 02:28:54 PM
is there no internet there?

There was, but it burned down.

Cheers

Jim
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 10 May, 2016, 04:47:10 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 10 May, 2016, 10:52:41 AM
Facebook has decided that it wants me to prove I am me and has  locked me out until I send it pictures of various of documents.

It's probably  because I don't  have my real DOB  logged (I'm 116 don't you know?).

But uploading images of passports and driving licenses sounds like a) a total scam  and b) a recipe for disaster.

Anybody else suffered this minor  impediment?

I haven't, but make sure it actually is Facebook before you send them anything!

Mind you, scan artists usually just try to get you to log in to their counterfeit site and part with details rather than ask for scans of ID, etc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 10 May, 2016, 05:06:51 PM
Try it from a different device, preferably from a different network (IP address)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 12 May, 2016, 11:37:45 AM
Have you traveled anywhere recently? A few friends of mine did a dig in the Sudan and logged in once there and on logging in again on their return FB decided a double-leap across from Khartoum to Bristol was UNSEEMLY and basically did what they've seemingly done to you. As a bizarre consequence of re-logging in their FB friendships with eachother were nullified and both assumed after an argument they'd had in the Sudan that the other had blocked them and they became enemies. Only after two months of this passive rage did anyone question the root of it and the FB mistake was revealed.

FACEBOOK COSTS FRIENDSHIPS!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 12 May, 2016, 12:35:12 PM
The hidden story behind the tragedies of Darfur, revealed...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 12 May, 2016, 04:34:56 PM
Trouty is out there and doing very well.  Seems very happy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 12 May, 2016, 08:22:12 PM
Quote from: Professor Bear on 10 May, 2016, 11:44:46 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 09 May, 2016, 07:39:59 PM
Does natural honey work for hay fever, or is that an old wives' tale?

Locally produced honey was what I heard - might just be a placebo, but some have sworn by it.
A Kenalog  (http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/medicines/a6953/kenalog-intra-articular-intramuscular-injection-triamcinolone/)jab used to be a life-saver for me, but my symptoms became less severe over time so my GP steered me onto generic meds instead.
The locally produced honey myth has been studied a number of times.  It doesn't matter where the pollen was from, by the time it's been through a bee, distilled and turned in to honey it has no effect (speaking as somebody whose asthma and hayfever would be greatly improved if it did).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 12 May, 2016, 08:23:39 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 10 May, 2016, 10:52:41 AM
Facebook has decided that it wants me to prove I am me and has  locked me out until I send it pictures of various of documents.

It's probably  because I don't  have my real DOB  logged (I'm 116 don't you know?).

But uploading images of passports and driving licenses sounds like a) a total scam  and b) a recipe for disaster.

Anybody else suffered this minor  impediment?
Quite a few subcultures have been targeted by hate campaigners using the 'report this profile' feature.  I've had tens (maybe a hundred) friends whose profiles were closed down, either temporarily or permanently due to the hate mongers :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 May, 2016, 10:08:05 PM
It's bad enough that Ryanair charge an exorbitant £90 to add a 15kg hold bag, but to then add another £3.60 admin fee for doing so is just taking the piss. It's like getting a kicking followed by an invoice for the shoe leather.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 May, 2016, 01:39:00 AM
Was supposed to be getting up at 1am for work. Went to bed early, feeling shattered after a string of long days. Awoke to sunshine and birdsong and a clock showing ten to six.

I threw my clothes on and piled out of the door in a blaspheming panic. It struck me that I should bite the bullet and ring the boss. Only then did I realise my 'phone was off. The alarm must not have gone off. Damned thing. I turned it on and the clock said 17:51.

I'd been asleep less than half an hour. So I went back to bed and dreamed about being lost in an airport in South Africa.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 14 May, 2016, 03:21:12 AM
In my book, waking up and finding you have plenty more time to sleep is drokking fantastic. Funny story mind you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 14 May, 2016, 06:30:16 AM
I've done this as well.  It is really freaky.  Woke up and saw daylight when I was expecting it to still be dark.  There was something wrong though with the light and it really threw me.  Panicked that I was that late for work.  When I got downstairs my wife looked at me like I was nuts.  It was only about eight o'clock.  That was why the sunlight was odd, it was coming from the wrong side.  Kicked up to bed again.

Don't mind waking up a little bit early.  Got to be careful though.  Too early and I either can't get back again or if I do then I go back too much and when the alarm goes off I'm really groggy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 May, 2016, 08:04:10 AM
Heh, I guess finding I had another 7 hours in bed was a bit of a bonus. The light thing was odd as well, thinking about it - but being sleep-addled and panicked it just seemed like an odd detail.

All's well that ends well, though, I'm currently having my break at the M18/M180 services. (Unless I'm dreaming...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 14 May, 2016, 08:34:22 AM
Considering where you are, not sure I'd use the word 'dreaming'!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 16 May, 2016, 08:58:38 AM
Football. Bloody football.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: morpheas on 16 May, 2016, 12:16:32 PM
Missed that Karl Urban was in FedCon in Bonn for the Weekend... :'( Only 141 km away. Gäh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 16 May, 2016, 05:28:54 PM
Today, I saw a logo and brand design being promoted by a much bigger company than mine, that's so fundamentally flawed in so many ways that I am genuinely emotional and upset about it. Never happened to me before, but just as good design can inspire and elevate the senses, so too can bad design have the opposite effect it seems.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 20 May, 2016, 02:27:56 PM
A paying gig with a tight deadline and like a complete fucking idiot, I said edits were included in the cost (which was already well-below pro rates): the client wanted four pages of comics art and they also wanted them coloured and lettered - all perfectly doable.  With a fortnight to go, it transpired there was some confusion at the difference between "pages" and "stories" and four pages was actually 16 (but creative wrangling on my part meant I could do this in 8 pages), and they still hadn't supplied a script because it had to filter through several layers of management, despite their hiring a writer specifically to do this job for them.
Less than a week to go for the deadline and no decision has been made on what the characters will look like yet, as after a few days of finally getting to draw something, they told me the setting had been changed from contemporary Myanmar to "space" and none of the characters were human now.  They've also just knocked off for the weekend, but before doing so, I was told to just go ahead and draw whatever I could apart from characters or backgrounds.

Long story short: I have a feeling I'm not getting paid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 May, 2016, 02:35:53 PM
Just draw four pages of cocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 May, 2016, 02:39:02 PM
Oh Prof, I think that's the worst 'client is a moron' story I've heard in a while.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 20 May, 2016, 03:06:03 PM
Ouch. That feeling when you slowly come to realise things aren't what they seem is horrid.

Just had a 25MB attachment clogging up my email, which came with the message "will also send over wetransfer too as it's quite a large file..." Note the use of "too" rather than "instead". Grrr...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 May, 2016, 03:09:20 PM
submit 16 blank pages and an invoice and tell them it's finished "apart from the backgrounds and the characters"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 21 May, 2016, 12:17:41 PM
finally had enough of forbidden planet international's online service... whats the point of pre-ordering something then being repeatedly told its been delayed..then going to the actual shop and finding loads in stock! this has happened 4 times now so that's it.done.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 22 May, 2016, 03:04:02 PM
Considering some of the news on the board this weekend this definitely comes under the heading of 'minor'. 

Had a job interview on Thursday but got cut loose after the lesson.  Fair enough, thanks for not wasting my time.  Feedback was useful.  Out of the blue I get an email from the head to say that they would like to offer a temporary contract and would I come in talk about it.  The original post was permanent but curious to know what had changed.  Agree to meeting to discuss it since it doesn't commit to anything.  Further email from the head with more feedback, including the fact that my current head did not provide a particularly good reference.   :|

Positive feeling about offer vs negative reference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 May, 2016, 03:07:26 PM
that's good re the offer but the negative is a concern as they are really not allowed to do that these days.  Could you approach head and ask what his concerns were and why he didn't bring them to you (in a nice way)?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 22 May, 2016, 04:20:01 PM
Legally they have to be accurate and factual so yes it is possible for an employer to give you a bad reference.  The current head is not exactly the most approachable person and she has done it to several other people.  The new head said that it was something that we could discuss when we meet.

Wait and see I guess.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 May, 2016, 04:53:00 PM
True but I know they have to be very careful and most prefer just to say you worked for them. It seems now it's either a positive reference or just reference. It's unusual these days. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 22 May, 2016, 05:00:27 PM
Aye, I know.  See what I find out tomorrow and go from there.  She's retiring at the end of term anyway but it depends on what was in it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 22 May, 2016, 06:22:42 PM
Good luck with it.  Hopefully you can get something and build from there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 May, 2016, 07:08:00 PM
They obviously gave you a negative reference because they don't want to lose you... Best of luck, though, I hope all goes well.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DaveGYNWA on 23 May, 2016, 09:47:13 AM
Working with a customer (outsourced to us by O2/Telefonica, but they are managing the customer) last week on a mass rollout of ~900 iPads, all managed by the software of which my previous employers (BlackBerry) are the creators. After the first 50 devices, we spotted a major issue which I quickly found the cause for and implemented a workaround ("yeah, that little thing where we import all these users in to the system then activate them.....sorry, they have to be added manually now so do you have a lowly grunt available to do this?")

So I worked with O2 on documenting the issue, providing analysis of the cause and the workaround (and  crucially....100% reproducible steps so that they can reproduce this in their test lab) and they report it to BlackBerry. That was Friday morning....during that day there were a few back and forths to clarify things (things that are actually in the report, if they bothered to read it properly) and then they proceeded with testing. And all testing so far has failed to reproduce the issue - they've had their testing team work on it over the weekend, and performed 'multiple' tests and 0% reproduction.

Been scratching my head this morning on this one - so I get the BlackBerry support guys on the phone and go through the reproduction steps with them and instantly highlight their issue. Wrong version of server software, and totally wrong application installed on the device.

5 minutes after the call - oh, we've reproduced the issue now. Muppets.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 23 May, 2016, 11:22:19 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 May, 2016, 07:08:00 PM
They obviously gave you a negative reference because they don't want to lose you... Best of luck, though, I hope all goes well.

Yeah, that would be my guess. Ask for the reference in full.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 30 May, 2016, 11:02:02 PM
I have a chest infection; I've had a cough for three months and was nagged by my wife into going to the doctors last week. I am taking an antibiotic: Doxycycline.

Thing is, no one told me* that one of its side effects is that it makes you "phototoxic".

That means you burn in the sun as if your flesh was magnesium. Combine that with (a) a Glasgow tan at the best of times; (b) a bank holiday; and (c) six hours in the park with my boys, and now I look like Red Skull and feel like Ghost Rider.

Oh, and to make things worse, my missus is a pharmacist. When I said I felt a little burny, she dead-panned "oh yeah, you probably shouldn't have been out in the sun today if you're taking those antibiotics."

Now I know how Dracula feels on a sunny morning.


*OK, the pharmacy label stuck on the box says "do not expose skin to direct sunlight" but, come on, who reads the label?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 30 May, 2016, 11:06:50 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 23 May, 2016, 11:22:19 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 May, 2016, 07:08:00 PM
They obviously gave you a negative reference because they don't want to lose you... Best of luck, though, I hope all goes well.

Yeah, that would be my guess. Ask for the reference in full.

You're entitled to this. If they don't cough up, make a request under the Data Protection Act.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 31 May, 2016, 12:32:35 AM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 30 May, 2016, 11:02:02 PM
I have a chest infection; I've had a cough for three months and was nagged by my wife into going to the doctors last week. I am taking an antibiotic: Doxycycline.

Thing is, no one told me* that one of its side effects is that it makes you "phototoxic".

That means you burn in the sun as if your flesh was magnesium. Combine that with (a) a Glasgow tan at the best of times; (b) a bank holiday; and (c) six hours in the park with my boys, and now I look like Red Skull and feel like Ghost Rider.

Oh, and to make things worse, my missus is a pharmacist. When I said I felt a little burny, she dead-panned "oh yeah, you probably shouldn't have been out in the sun today if you're taking those antibiotics."

Now I know how Dracula feels on a sunny morning.


*OK, the pharmacy label stuck on the box says "do not expose skin to direct sunlight" but, come on, who reads the label?


Call yourself a doctor...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 31 May, 2016, 07:35:31 AM
I've been taking it for months DrX for my eyes, I learned this similarly but thankfully it wasn't as sunny when I started taking it.

Hope you are OK.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 31 May, 2016, 07:36:25 AM
And it probably helps having the darker Cornish hue to be fair.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 31 May, 2016, 08:38:52 AM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 30 May, 2016, 11:06:50 PM
Quote from: Theblazeuk on 23 May, 2016, 11:22:19 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 May, 2016, 07:08:00 PM
They obviously gave you a negative reference because they don't want to lose you... Best of luck, though, I hope all goes well.

Yeah, that would be my guess. Ask for the reference in full.

You're entitled to this. If they don't cough up, make a request under the Data Protection Act.

Not sure if it was negative because they don't want to lose me.  Haven't really got on too well with her.  C'est la vie.  The details were fairly bland, just not overly enthusiastic.  Guess that is where the 'not a good reference' comment came from.

The offer was for a temporary contract.  Since I have a permanent contract at the moment and had an interview the next day for a permanent job as well I decided to gratefully decline.  As it turned out it was the right choice as I got the job the next day.  Much better place to work.  Management seem far more level headed (used to work with the deputy head a long time ago, she's 'good people') so all worked out for the best.

Guess this is no longer in the right thread!  Thanks anyway guys.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 May, 2016, 08:56:23 AM
Good to hear, Tjm, well done :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eric Plumrose on 17 June, 2016, 11:42:09 AM
Twenty-six reports still to proofread for the Souster Woman . . . and Microsoft Word decides to uninstall itself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 June, 2016, 01:54:12 PM
You have my sympathy.

I always use InDesign but had to use Word to do my wife's CV the other day and struggled to even do something as simple as formatting a table. The whole program is undeniably unintuitive – before doing anything I had to hunt around for the specific icon or menu option, and then use Google for instructions.

It's unbelievable to me that so many years of development and so much money have gone into something so obviously bad. It's virtually unusable – and as I struggled through, it took me over two hours to do something which in InDesign would have taken me 10-15 minutes (and looked even better).

I am seriously thinking about setting up a support group for people who are forced to use Word.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 17 June, 2016, 02:27:44 PM
Quote from: Eric Plumrose on 17 June, 2016, 11:42:09 AM
Twenty-six reports still to proofread for the Souster Woman . . . and Microsoft Word decides to uninstall itself.

Openoffice (https://www.openoffice.org/) does all the important stuff that Word does.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 17 June, 2016, 02:57:03 PM
Quote from: Banners on 17 June, 2016, 01:54:12 PM
It's unbelievable to me that so many years of development and so much money have gone into something so obviously bad.
Every time I have the bad luck of having to use that program it feels as if it's the first time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 18 June, 2016, 06:13:30 AM
Quote from: Professor Bear on 17 June, 2016, 02:27:44 PM
Quote from: Eric Plumrose on 17 June, 2016, 11:42:09 AM
Twenty-six reports still to proofread for the Souster Woman . . . and Microsoft Word decides to uninstall itself.


I installed that on our new* work PCs due to the fact that they were bought cheaply with little preinstalled software and OpenOffice is free, and

Openoffice (https://www.openoffice.org/) does all the important stuff that Word does.

Also I've used it on my home PCs (well actually I use LibreOffice on my home laptop but it seems to be more or less the same thing) and I actually find it more intuitive than Word. ( I don't have much of an issue with Word any more Banners but I know what you mean. It took me a while to get used to the icon system in the newer versions. There's a bit of that in OpenOffice, but not nearly as much and I know where I stand with the older style menu system. )

Then at work on Thursday my colleague asked me if there was a chance we could install MS word on the new PCs. And she's having issues with 'Excel** "which is just weird" .  Curiously I'm not surprised. She's not stupid by any means (hey, she finds MS Word intuitive!) but she is very much a mainstream kind of person, if that makes sense.

Part of me is a bit puzzled though. I don't find the applications all that different, and accessing everything through the old-school menu system is far more understandable than my working out what picture in which section ( and is it even available?)   is supposed to mean.

Might be showing our age differences though. I grew up on similar systems in the old Word, and this young lady is only 27 years old so likely only used the newer interfaces in her life, which to be fair have been around for a good while now.

*Relative to the old computers. This was a case of replacing old technology with less old technology because they had a newer version of Windows installed, and it was cheaper than upgrading the OS.

** She means Calc
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 June, 2016, 04:02:00 PM
Bloody kidney stone. Lying on a trolley since 430am waiting for them to decide whether to cut me open or not. I blame Neal Stephenson for my dread of this now-minor impediment, but brother this morphine stuff is the biz. Also, free wiffy!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 18 June, 2016, 04:05:10 PM
Eek - horrible stuff TB, good luck with all that. I have vivid memories of Al Swearengen's ordeal with them in the second season of Deadwood, I hope it's not nearly that harrowing (and sweary).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 June, 2016, 04:14:40 PM
Ouch - hope the ordeal's a short one, Tordels. Can't they break those things up with ultrasound these days, or did I dream it?

Either way, get well soon, fella.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 June, 2016, 04:22:50 PM
Ouch and feck! Sounds 'orrible, TB. Hope you'll be okay soon. Cheers to ye!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 June, 2016, 05:08:52 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 18 June, 2016, 04:14:40 PM
Ouch - hope the ordeal's a short one, Tordels. Can't they break those things up with ultrasound these days, or did I dream it?

This had been my understanding too, but apparently not in this neck of the woods. Here they favour going up the willy with a gadget which I envisage as resembling MekQuake's neck. No thanks, matron! Excruciating experience for two hours right up to the lovely pillowy embrace of Lady Morphine when the swearing stopped. I'm afraid I lacked Al's eloquence when push came to shove.

Now it's just tea and cheese sambos  until I get to the fasting deadline. Buttonman I'm not. Missed taking my boy to the Coderdojo Expo which is a pisser, but grud bless the 21st century all the same.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Minkyboy on 18 June, 2016, 05:14:43 PM
Ah Tordels, you are making me wince you poor fella with a poor fella.
Get well soon.
Minky
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 18 June, 2016, 05:40:43 PM
Yoincks! Free wifi! Bah! A blasted kidney stone! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!

Hope you ge it out of your system (pffffttt!!!) soon Senior Tordels, that can't be a pleasent experience to have!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 June, 2016, 05:55:08 PM
Ouch TB: one of my old uni flat mates passed a kidney stone once: We heard a blood curdling scream and found him passed out on the bathroom floor from the pain in a puddle of blood and urine. Go for the medical intervention whatever it is, at least they give you good drugs!

As for Word: I use it all the time and it would probably take me hours to do anything in indesign because I don't know where anything is
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 June, 2016, 07:01:01 PM
'parrently my email and password for amazon has appeared on a list somewhere so I now have to change everything...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 June, 2016, 09:29:58 PM
...and for the second time this week we had a takeaway delivery we didn't order..and we'd just had tea so there was no point keeping it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eric Plumrose on 20 June, 2016, 09:31:34 PM
Quote from: Professor Bear on 17 June, 2016, 02:27:44 PM
Openoffice (https://www.openoffice.org/) does all the important stuff that Word does.

Belated grassy arses, Prof. Personal Confusers confuse me and it's only recently I've made any attempt to be less . . . personally confsude.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eric Plumrose on 20 June, 2016, 10:02:39 PM
Quote from: Tordelback on 18 June, 2016, 04:02:00 PM
but brother this morphine stuff is the biz.

Several years ago I had complications from a haemorrhoidectomy and spent a long-weekend dosed up with Miss Emma. But, yessiree, Bob. It's like being hugged by a cloud, though be prepared for some itchy-twitchiness once your discharged, Tordels. Best wishes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 June, 2016, 09:47:39 AM
My feet and ankles have swollen like balloons. My friends tell me it's water retention caused by hot weather and dehydration but me and Google reckon its congestive heart disease or acute kidney failure
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 21 June, 2016, 10:36:12 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 21 June, 2016, 09:47:39 AM
My feet and ankles have swollen like balloons. My friends tell me it's water retention caused by hot weather and dehydration 600 pints of Greek beer

Stay away from Dr. Google.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 21 June, 2016, 07:09:54 PM
/\

Yeah. I tend to avoid google when diagnosing in case it comes up with worst case scenarios!

I say, drink plenty, but get a check up soon!

It might even be a reaction to insect/spider bite. They can cause swelling. Although probably not both feet unless you walked through a nest of the little rascals.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 24 June, 2016, 07:45:17 PM
My daughter was 11 on Thursday but the impediment was when the wife came into the lounge with the cake ...she had bought two indoor fireworky candles which threatened to burn the ceiling! they were more like naval flares!  the smoke alarms work though...after my burnt thumb at firework night I thought she would have remembered to buy anything flammable from the range!

and in a bogof

chester zoo... my wife tried to pre-book a scooter from the mobility hut but was told we couldn't..ever..and had to take pot luck on the day,which we did,then got told there weren't any as theyd all been....booked!  she nearly left there and then but I managed to snag a wheelchair and get her around most of the zoo which didn't do my back much good but hey ho! the lass had a great day out!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: flip-r mk2 on 24 June, 2016, 09:12:45 PM
Falkirk town centre becomes a no go zone as it time slips back to the 17th century, when 74 orange lodges and 50 flute bands celebrate 300+ years of religious bigotry :(

filippo
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 24 June, 2016, 11:48:26 PM
TB, I have had two kidney stones in the past, I wouldn't wish them on anyone :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 July, 2016, 11:49:58 AM
Been sat in stationary traffic on the M62 for just shy of three hours. Ho-hum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 July, 2016, 09:20:41 PM
Just noticed that I seem to have Amazon Prime, but I never knowingly signed up for it - checked the details and apparently I paid £79 for a year's worth in February! I think I bought a track on Prime music but this charge on my statement must've slipped under the radar. Bollocks.

I'm going to watch the fuck out of it between now and next Feb to get my money's worth Preacher her I come.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 July, 2016, 12:50:17 AM
I think you can still get your money back if you haven't actually used the Prime service after the free month.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 06 July, 2016, 01:48:51 AM
You can also demand a refund as it isn't clear what they do..I had the exact same thing happen to me .I kicked off mildly and got my money back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 July, 2016, 09:41:55 AM
Quote from: The Cosh on 06 July, 2016, 12:50:17 AM
I think you can still get your money back if you haven't actually used the Prime service after the free month.

Ah didn't know that -  watched Preacher last night   ::)

Quote from: Grugz on 06 July, 2016, 01:48:51 AM
You can also demand a refund as it isn't clear what they do..I had the exact same thing happen to me .I kicked off mildly and got my money back.

I'll probably stick with it - I cancelled my Netflix this month when they put the price up as I'd watched all the series I really wanted it for. I'll just try to watch as much Prime as I can
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 July, 2016, 09:48:01 AM
£79 for a years subscription is nothing to sniff at either. Less than a tenner a month for some cracking entertainment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 July, 2016, 10:12:18 AM
Yeah, I'll certainly get some use out of it - just seemed like a lot when I saw the full year's cost, and I was pissed off that they'd signed me up sneakilly without me really being aware - more expensive than Netflix used to be, cheaper than Netflix is now
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 06 July, 2016, 11:19:14 AM
I don't give a shit how nice the range of programming is - a lot of people stuck with Prime contracts don't have that kind of money to throw away, otherwise they might have singed up willingly without having to be conned into doing so. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 06 July, 2016, 11:36:34 AM
there's a good chance I was very drunk at the time (I usually am when I buy music online :crazy:)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 06 July, 2016, 11:39:02 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 06 July, 2016, 11:36:34 AM
there's a good chance I was very drunk at the time (I usually am when I buy music online :crazy:)
Oh thank grud i'm not the only one!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 06 July, 2016, 09:31:31 PM
I put an old keyboard on eBay recently with starting price of £5.00 not expecting to get much for it.

By the end of the auction it was over £60!

The guy paid quickly. I delivered.... then I get a message that it is faulty.

Okay. My fault. I hadn't played it for years and just tested it out by playing it. It seemed to work fine, but it turns out it was the style section (which I didn't test) that was faulty.

Fair dos. "Return it and I'll give you a full refund,"I say. "If you want to keep it i'll give you 50% refund".

He went for the 50% option. That's fine. Still more than I thought I'd get for it.

Unfortunately I can't give the refund straight away as a bill came up shortly after the purchase, but before the fault was reported. But I told him I'd process refund at the end of the month with a bit extra for the inconvenience.

'I paid" he says today. "End of month is too long." (I was a bit puzzled at that because he would still be out of the money if the keyboard has been okay right? But I understand he might be worried I'm gonna pull a fast one.) "If you give me address will you pay the postage since the keyboard was faulty?"  So he wants a full refund after all. Even despite me stating I couldn't even pay a partial refund until end of month.

Truth is, I don't want it back. I'm moving soon, and apart from generating money I wanted to clear out the old stuff. So I explain why I  can't do refund until end of month. And that I will give him a full refund, but it will have to be at the end of the month, when I'm paid. In other words he will have a free working, but slightly faulty keyboard at the end of the month.

So what seemed a great result turns out pretty poor for me, but hey, ho. My fault.

I get another message not too long ago. Something about he understood, but end of month was too long to open dispute because other people had made same promises to him.

I don't know anything about ebay dispute policy. I do know that I am honest and I WILL pay him at the end of the month. I'm even willing to refund his postage costs.  But he doesn't know me. And I do understand where he's coming from. He's not the bad guy here. I took a stupid chance in not checking the keyboard thoroughly before auctioning it. But I can't pay yet.

Thinking I could ask him for his email address and send him the refund via credit card on PayPal. But that will cost me even more. I don't see why I should do that if I can do it all direct and painless at the end of the month.

But what if he opens a dispute?

Again, he's not the bad guy. Neither am I. I'm just broke. And a divvy for not being more careful. But he doesn't know that.

Argh!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 06 July, 2016, 10:35:29 PM
On the plus side, I only just remembered, it's Prog-download-day today!

Don't mind my long winded grumpy post above. Its just my recent experience reminded me of that old saying "if things seem too good, they probably are." Often true, alas, but my issues are small potatoes* compared to what a lot of people are going through. And this is just  one of a couple of things to irritate me today, but it's not turning out to badly at the end...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 07 July, 2016, 04:15:49 PM
Despite this summer being utterly shite so far I managed to get a sunburned face yesterday by sitting in the garden talking bollocks with a mate for 4 hours yesterday.
The day before I put on sunscreen and got rained on.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 07 July, 2016, 05:15:49 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 07 July, 2016, 04:15:49 PM
Despite this summer being utterly shite so far I managed to get a sunburned face yesterday by sitting in the garden talking bollocks with a mate for 4 hours yesterday.
The day before I put on sunscreen and got rained on.
I'm hoping to go for a picnic with loads of friends on Saturday - use some sunscreen on Friday, eh?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 07 July, 2016, 08:58:42 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 07 July, 2016, 05:15:49 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 07 July, 2016, 04:15:49 PM
Despite this summer being utterly shite so far I managed to get a sunburned face yesterday by sitting in the garden talking bollocks with a mate for 4 hours yesterday.
The day before I put on sunscreen and got rained on.
I'm hoping to go for a picnic with loads of friends on Saturday - use some sunscreen on Friday, eh?

Sounds like a plan.  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 14 July, 2016, 10:29:30 AM
Our newest and littlest pet took ill and died in the course of about 24 hours. Poor little Walter. Saw him take his last breath just 1/2 an hour before I would have been able to give him his second dose of antibiotics.

We'd just gone away to the US for medical trips and only just got him back. Only had him for 5 and a half months. Got along great with our guinea pigs too, leading to my favourite pictures:

(http://i.imgur.com/hzNY1KM.jpg)

It's stupid I know, he was going to die at some point in the next couple of years and it would have gone like this. But he brought such happiness to my wife and he was such a good little guy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 July, 2016, 11:21:20 AM
Aww. Sorry to hear that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 14 July, 2016, 01:17:57 PM
Speaking as someone who recently lost a Guinea Pig, I know how sad this must be Blaze. Small rodents are such good pets.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 14 July, 2016, 01:28:54 PM
Sorry to hear that Blaze. Bloody pets break your heart.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 14 July, 2016, 07:54:18 PM
my daughter's last year in primary has been her worst ever she loved school til she got two teachers that just seem to have it in for her...all throughout she has been well above her expected level (didn't get her brains from my side!) but this one teacher is friends with an ex-aunt and has been talking about her with the ex-aunt . they say she has an attitude and daydreams etc they have a school leavers play coming up and my girl had a couple of parts and was looking forward to it but lately she hasn't and has been bollocked for not enjoying the very long song they have to sing (4 pages of a4) and cause she has had time off for ibs (exacerbated by worrying about how she'll be picked on by the teacher from day to day) even though her attendance is in the high 80's she overheard some downright nasty comments about her and already had her replacement lined up from the year below... now what I want to do is peel their faces off with a sharpened teaspoon but that may be frowned upon. and the head always takes the teachers side..and she doesn't want me to go in as she fears the nasty may get worse...we've since told them she isn't doing the play and am really tempted to keep her off next week as its her last one.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 14 July, 2016, 09:09:51 PM
This is what really gets my back up.  Teachers like this make it damn near impossible to sort problems out properly when kids are occasionally malicious little scrotes.  There are times when kids and teachers just don't click for whatever reason but it still has to be handled professionally.  Who's the adult?  Gossiping with relatives about students outside of school is unprofessional.  Sorry.  Discussing issues with parents and being willing to accept when you have it wrong is appropriate.

One option open is to take the grievance to the governing body.  Go through the head first and then if that gets the response you expect then ask for the school grievance policy and write a letter to the governors.  That is, if you feel strongly enough.

As you say, we are down to the last FIVE DAYS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (not that I'm counting) Take your daughter to the doctors and get her signed off for anxiety to cover the EWO.  Write the letter to the head explaining why you are not sending her back in then start the holiday early.  Worst case scenario they fine you £60 which is why the doctors / letter / governors will be helpful.

Seriously, makes my blood boil!  Hope your daughter is okay and remember, next year she'll have all the joy of year 7 to contend with. ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 15 July, 2016, 11:10:46 AM
cheers, she is looking more forward to high school especially after her taster day...thing that gets me mad is that she has never been naughty other than being convieniently deaf three or four times when asked to do something like have a bath or tidy her room..other than that we couldn't have asked for a better daughter,kind caring polite and a wicked sense of humour...meanwhile the kids who swear ,skive etc always get the rewards!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 July, 2016, 01:38:24 PM
If you did escalate, would all her previous teachers be happy to confirm that they never had any problems with her?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 15 July, 2016, 02:21:22 PM
Initial negative space concept for Henry V poster based on the following quote...

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother...


(http://apt.uk/henryv.jpg)

Client: Amazing. But please remove the drops of blood.

Me: Okay.

Client: And make it more pointy. And symmetrical.

Me: Right. So basically just a crown then?

Client: Exactly. Perfect! And on a blue background please.

Grrr....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 15 July, 2016, 06:47:41 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 15 July, 2016, 01:38:24 PM
If you did escalate, would all her previous teachers be happy to confirm that they never had any problems with her?

they should,as she has been a star all through but,knowing teachers they tend to stick together.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 16 July, 2016, 10:11:58 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 15 July, 2016, 11:10:46 AM
..meanwhile the kids who swear ,skive etc always get the rewards!

This is always a sticky one and I find myself coming down on both sides of the argument.  Had a top set Year 11 this year that had nothing in the way of support and slogged their guts out all year.  Tried to arrange an engagement trip to Oxford and got shot down.  Meanwhile the ***** of the year group that caused mayhem all over the school had everything thrown at them.  All the support, interventions, trips etc.    On the flip side I've had younger students who respond positively to rewards and find the short term targets / tangible rewards help them focus and improve.  The thing is though, it has to be carefully managed and slowly withdrawn so that they take ownership.  Otherwise they end up like the scrotes previously mentioned.

Quote from: Grugz on 15 July, 2016, 06:47:41 PM

they should,as she has been a star all through but,knowing teachers they tend to stick together.

Possibly in public to students (or at least they should) since it is unprofessional and undermines teachers with a negative effect on learning.  That said, any management worth their salt should take steps to address the complaint.  Similarly any teacher that is remotely professional should acknowledge their shortcomings and take steps to address them.  Even if the student is in the wrong there are ways of handling it and the teacher is the adult in the situation.  I'm not so sure it is 'sticking together' mind so much as 'bunker mentality'. 

It is a shame that it has affected her final year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 16 July, 2016, 11:06:49 AM
my wife called her out on slagging the girl off behind her back but so she could hear it ,she said (and I quote ) " b-u-b-w..."etc..and got stroppy with the missus .this lot do seem very clicky and take pleasure in naming and shaming pupils for silly things the latest one being we hadn't paid her "voluntary contribution" of £10 for a school trip and put the names of all the kids who hadn't on the board!
  some of us are low income and cant keep forking out for trips that I always thought were budgeted for anyway? especially when they kept it once cos my lass was ill and was off school and wouldn't give it back!

any way as she says 5 more days...and she does think it too many
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 16 July, 2016, 12:22:24 PM
It's called a 'voluntary contribution' for a reason and can't be enforced.  Shit, if they do that then the governors / LEA (oh shit, not an option any more - cheers Mike / Nicky, try the head of the academy chain) need to be made aware.  That's the sort of thing that really gets my back up (putting it politely).  What the f****** hell are they doing in teaching?

5 days?  Thought it was only three (not that I'm counting or anything, or have been doing so for the last three weeks!)

"Dust off and nuke 'em from orbit, the only way to be sure!"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 16 July, 2016, 05:47:34 PM
aye, 5 for us (north west,dunno if its different elsewhere-I know some catholic schools have diff dates) but she finishes Friday at 2:30 then its holiday fun ,spending a fortune on uniform p.e. kit etc and then my little girl grows up...(sniff)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 16 July, 2016, 06:06:10 PM
Ditto here.  Leavers assembly tuesday afternoon.  Actually managed to get a leave of absence to go but haven't told her yet.  Leaving it for a surprise.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 17 July, 2016, 12:34:56 AM
Visit Worthing (east of Brighton) for party overnight, but no-one understand "We're not worthy!" reference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 17 July, 2016, 12:57:19 AM
Quote from: Goaty on 17 July, 2016, 12:34:56 AM
Visit Worthing (east of Brighton) for party overnight, but no-one understand "We're not worthy!" reference.

So make a Tank Girl ref.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 21 July, 2016, 12:16:53 AM
Well, tonight has been one of those nights.

First I stood on a piece of glass, then the film I was meant to see tonight (Star Trek Beyond) doesn't start until tommorow night instead (despite what the Customer Relations department of said cinema told me), & finally I've fallen out with my Mam over it (as I have to start early on Friday morning due to a course I'm currently attending).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 21 July, 2016, 01:29:19 AM
Hope you weren't badly cut Batman.
(I never thought I'd ever say that! :lol: )

Hope you cleaned it properly with a bit of diluted detol, and maybe get it checked out.

Not that I'm your mum. I just have a tendency to not get my own injuries checked and once or twice it came back to bite me again!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 21 July, 2016, 11:37:55 AM
Thanks but no detol, it's fine. My Mother is a Medical Secretary, after all!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 21 July, 2016, 06:25:33 PM
I have a cold.

But because I also have a wide, I have to go to work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 23 July, 2016, 12:25:44 AM
My brother with his friend's stag weekend in Munich, he and group have to stay inside. Hope they all back time safety. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 30 July, 2016, 08:43:56 AM
Neighbour across the road has set up a CCTV system on his property.  The thing is it appears to be covering my property as well as his.  I don't want my family's movements being recorded by the bloke across the street!!  So, I'm now going to have a couple of interesting days finding out about the Law!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 30 July, 2016, 11:56:56 AM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 30 July, 2016, 08:43:56 AM
Neighbour across the road has set up a CCTV system on his property.  The thing is it appears to be covering my property as well as his.  I don't want my family's movements being recorded by the bloke across the street!!  So, I'm now going to have a couple of interesting days finding out about the Law!!

Not sure... I wouldn't fancy it one little bit.  Just found this, though, it could be helpful.  http://www.problemneighbours.co.uk/what-can-we-do-about-neighbours-cctv-camera.html (http://www.problemneighbours.co.uk/what-can-we-do-about-neighbours-cctv-camera.html)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 30 July, 2016, 02:33:54 PM
Thanks for that, Jayzus.  Yes, I saw that site myself.  It's actually out of date.  All CCTV that films neighbours property is now covered by the Data Protection Act.  Pretty sure, matey across the road to me is breaking the law, so I'll be having a chat with him.  Don't care if he gets the hump or not, my family's privacy is far more important to me than getting on with any neighbour.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 July, 2016, 02:38:17 PM
I"m surprised the cameras are still there TBH. I thought Springwatch wrapped up weeks ago...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 30 July, 2016, 02:42:35 PM
You calling me a bird or a rat!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 30 July, 2016, 05:51:15 PM
If you've got nothing to hide you've got nothing to fear!  :P
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 30 July, 2016, 05:54:29 PM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 30 July, 2016, 08:43:56 AM
Neighbour across the road has set up a CCTV system on his property.  The thing is it appears to be covering my property as well as his.  I don't want my family's movements being recorded by the bloke across the street!!  So, I'm now going to have a couple of interesting days finding out about the Law!!
My families previous neighbor (we've since moved) did the same thing, placed a camera high upon the rear wall of his home, it could clearly see over our garden wall and it took a council sanction for him to finally remove it after 5 years of bitter arguments between the planning department (it was apparently an inbuilt feature for the conservatory it was attached to) and my mother. Hope it doesn't take that long for you, Tanky!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 July, 2016, 07:39:13 PM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 30 July, 2016, 08:43:56 AM
Neighbour across the road has set up a CCTV system on his property.  The thing is it appears to be covering my property as well as his.  I don't want my family's movements being recorded by the bloke across the street!!  So, I'm now going to have a couple of interesting days finding out about the Law!!

just start sitting around in the nude with the lights on and the curtains open, if he doesn't get the hint or complains about you do him for voyeurism!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 31 July, 2016, 05:28:54 PM
I'm doing the big shop.

And forgot my glasses and the shopping list.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 31 July, 2016, 08:32:31 PM
theres a dirty great hole in the rubber seal of the lg washer dryer,itsstill under warranty but lg are claiming it has nowt to do with them as its wear and tear cos a bit must have come loose and caused the damage!!!

  I have scribbled a reply ..it was civil,the next wont be...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 31 July, 2016, 08:45:39 PM
Think anything rubber will be classed as perishable, so won't be covered. :-(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 31 July, 2016, 09:03:30 PM
You may be able to get it replaced without too much bother. I'm not an expert or anything but in my last few rentals the landlord's handymen had to replace the seals and managed to track them down and I watched em whip em out and replace. Just got to find those obscure little shops filled with all the things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 31 July, 2016, 09:04:01 PM
even if its a part fallen off causing the damage?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: futureimperfect on 01 August, 2016, 06:03:07 AM
I've buggered my right arm. Luckily I'm left handed but any two handed activity (playing guitar, computer games, conducting an orchestra) is right out. I think I must have pulled something playing tennis. That will teach me for trying to get fit.

Still I'm looking forward to taking advantage of this tomorrow. Like on the bus.

"Excuse me, do ya mind if I sit there"
"Why?"
"Got an injury. These seats are for disabled people. That's me today"

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 01 August, 2016, 08:57:01 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 31 July, 2016, 08:32:31 PM
theres a dirty great hole in the rubber seal of the lg washer dryer,itsstill under warranty but lg are claiming it has nowt to do with them as its wear and tear cos a bit must have come loose and caused the damage!!!

  I have scribbled a reply ..it was civil,the next wont be...

Used to work for Dixons booking in white goods repairs - have LG sent an engineer to look at the washer yet? If they're saying it's wear and tear they should be able to prove it. If not, it needs replacing by them.

Also, did you take out extended warranty? If so, you should find it covers you for more things than a Manufacturer's Warranty does and you can speak to them about a booking, if LG just wont help.

Finally, if none of the above works, get a 3rd party to take a look at it (make sure its an actual company who does this, not some bloke cash-in-hand). If they find it is definately a manufacturing issue they can write you an official letter confirming this, and LG would then have to carry out the repair. (assuming it is a manufacturing issue - I'm no engineer!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 August, 2016, 05:20:40 PM
just had the snottiest bloke ever accusing me of "misusing" it and if theres a hole and I send them a pic it always gets put down to misuse. I have asked for a senior rep to call me back...where i'll probably get fobbed off more.

LG have a shit customer care service.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 August, 2016, 09:32:05 AM
'We don't like the latest CD cover concepts that our major international record label has done for us. We stopped using you when we got signed (and after you designed the covers for all our early releases that brought us to prominence), but could you do four new concepts they can use. Before 10am. As a favour. For free.'

~Ahem~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 17 August, 2016, 10:19:35 AM
washer fixed! even though the bloke nearly had a stroke getting the seal out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 17 August, 2016, 10:26:33 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 17 August, 2016, 10:19:35 AM
washer fixed! even though the bloke nearly had a stroke getting the seal out.

Got to be animal cruelty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old One Eye on 17 August, 2016, 11:00:04 AM
I put a wash on this morning while getting ready for work.  After switching it on I noticed I'd dropped a pair of pants on they way to the machine.  The annoying thing is they're the only thing I have for a dark wash.  It's somewhat irksome...  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 August, 2016, 11:14:12 AM
I'm sitting outside a launderette right now, enjoying the sunshine and a cup of lovely strong black tea from the caff next door, watching the world go by and passing the time of day with strangers. The minor impediment of not having my own washing machine any more feels like no impediment, minor or otherwise, today. Life is grand!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 17 August, 2016, 11:41:07 AM
Ahh, yes... When I lived in the back of a garage and didn't have a washing machine, I did quite enjoy going to the launderette. Cleansing for your soul, as well as your smalls...(!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trent on 17 August, 2016, 12:00:14 PM
I love launderettes. My wife still teases me about how amusing I apparently was trying to work out how to roll up her tights after they had been dried. I always find launderettes relaxing and often interesting places to hang out for a bit while your clothes dry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old One Eye on 17 August, 2016, 12:02:34 PM
God, I haven't been to a launderette in about 20 years.  There's one just up the road from me.  It actually does look like a quite a cool wee place.  It's got coffee shop with some nice pictures on the wall and everything.  My last launderette had the vibe of a crack house!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 August, 2016, 12:11:02 PM
This one has a caff on one side and a beauty salon on the other - builders' butts to my right and sunny-weather cleavages to my left. All levels of humanity existing cheek to cheek, as it were.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 17 August, 2016, 12:16:37 PM
I just enjoy how quickly you can dry your clothes in those big drums, saving me the most irritating bit of laundry - hanging up the clothes to dry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 17 August, 2016, 02:07:12 PM
Quote from: Fungus on 17 August, 2016, 10:26:33 AM
Quote from: Grugz on 17 August, 2016, 10:19:35 AM
washer fixed! even though the bloke nearly had a stroke getting the seal out.

Got to be animal cruelty.

:lol:
Perfect answer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 17 August, 2016, 05:00:32 PM
I must be posh as I've never been to a laundrette.
I usually get my butler to go.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 18 August, 2016, 07:53:47 PM
we've nearly got the girl's uniform for high school sorted except for trainers...she has always been a nightmare for buying shoes and hasn't improved with age!...and whats with the clip on ties? and "skorts"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 August, 2016, 05:41:28 AM
A really cool idea for a Dredd story was developing in a dream; it had to do with the Undercity, a train, a rogue long-walk judge and Old Stoneyface having only his boot-knife to fight his way out with. The story had a proper structure and a satisfying ending. It was dark, had humour and excitement and felt like classic Dredd.

Then I got rudely awakened by, of all things, a ridiculously loud peal of thunder (all peals of thunder are ridiculously loud when you're living in a shed) and a terrified dog jumping into my bed and trying to bury himself under the covers all trembly and whimpering. And I all but lost the dream so only a few fuzzy fragments remain.

Damn you, Thor - damn you all to Helheim!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 August, 2016, 05:46:46 AM
Imagine what the eternal canon of poetry could have lost if Coleridge had lived in a shed/owned a cuddly dog!  Not to mention  the knock-on effect on Frankie Goes to Hollywood...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 August, 2016, 05:54:24 AM
And imagine what unutterable shite Zarjaz readers could have been spared if only there'd been more nocturnal thunderings!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 28 August, 2016, 12:59:05 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 28 August, 2016, 05:41:28 AM
A really cool idea for a Dredd story was developing in a dream; it had to do with the Undercity, a train, a rogue long-walk judge and Old Stoneyface having only his boot-knife to fight his way out with. The story had a proper structure and a satisfying ending. It was dark, had humour and excitement and felt like classic Dredd.

Then I got rudely awakened by, of all things, a ridiculously loud peal of thunder (all peals of thunder are ridiculously loud when you're living in a shed) and a terrified dog jumping into my bed and trying to bury himself under the covers all trembly and whimpering. And I all but lost the dream so only a few fuzzy fragments remain.

Damn you, Thor - damn you all to Helheim!
Sounds like the theme for the next short story competition to me...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 19 September, 2016, 03:48:23 PM
Hate red tape from Companies House. No idea what this even means.

(http://apt.uk/chouse.png)

Damn screen wouldn't let me past without filling it in, and the helpline were useless so I guessed. If I did it wrong and end up in prison, please arrange to have my Progs passed on. Cheers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 September, 2016, 02:01:30 PM
made a delicious lunch to take into work (Chicken and veg fried rice with chilli, garlic and soy-sauce), plus a cheese & pickle sandwich for morning break - and left the whole lot on the bloody tram. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 22 September, 2016, 02:26:45 PM
Leaving that cheese & pickle sandwich in a warm public place could be construed as an act of terrorism.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 September, 2016, 02:45:47 PM
I've been keeping an eye on the news for any suspicious package evacuations or controlled explosions!  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 September, 2016, 03:00:00 PM
That's just awful, leaving an I.E.D.* on the tram.


*Irrecoverable Extemporized Dejeuner.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 26 September, 2016, 02:47:26 PM
That feeling of constantly running on the spot. Need to make some changes to get life in order. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rackle on 11 October, 2016, 02:25:07 PM
I made it through to round two of interviews for a job I really really wanted and I knew the interviews went well & I'd be really happy if offered the job.  They've kept me hanging on for almost a fortnight to decide if I got the job or not - clearly I didn't else I wouldn't be posting here, but never mind.  I had to call and ask (oh the indignity!) and apparently I was the 2nd choice and were it not for person they offered the job to, I'd have been perfect.  :( Grrrr

Oh well life goes on.

The good news is that like busses, new jobs are scarce and then several come through at once, so I've applied for 4 this morning. I also get to pretend to be The Dude from The Big Lebowski by lounging around in my dressing gown and having my cat shadow me all day whilst I treat myself to freshly brewed coffee. And... I might have ordered something 2000AD related for someone's fast-approaching birthday  :D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 October, 2016, 04:24:02 PM
Fucking Marshmallow.

I foolishly upgraded and my favourite apps have stopped working with wifi.

Chrome and whatsapp still work but Facebook and Fitbit just plain old refuse to connect over wifi.

I've reset and rebooted everything (in itself a pain) but those two still refuse to work.

It's decided to merge different  contacts who happen to share the same name. It's lost my ringtones (So Love Machine no longer plays when Mrs. Tips calls).

Plus the stern American voice on mapmyrun is now a softly spoken European that I can barely hear.

And you can't go back to Lollipop.

Bah!

(Still, less FB is probably a good thing).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 25 October, 2016, 10:33:36 AM
Can't remember if there is a life is unbelievably shit thread but I've just been given notice to quit my flat by end of January. I have been there since 2003 so it feels like the end of the world at the moment. I have a very upset stomach.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 October, 2016, 11:12:55 AM
That sucks, SG. Are there any clauses in your tenancy agreement you can use to stop this? If you're not sure, take it along to the CAB and/or a solicitor who'll give you a free hour. Local housing charities may also have specialist knowledge on which you can draw. Are there other tenants in your position? If so, maybe you can organise an opposition.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 October, 2016, 11:34:47 AM
Bummer staticgirl -  Are they selling or just jacking the rent up beyond your means? The rental market is truly frightening - I'm lucky to rent a (formerly council) housing association flat that I've been in for 23 years, so there's no danger of sudden eviction, (unless I get seriously anti-social!)

And there is a "life spugs because" thread ...https://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=24364.0 (https://forums.2000adonline.com/index.php?topic=24364.0)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 25 October, 2016, 01:58:31 PM
Shite news SG. That happened to me about four years ago. New landlord decided to renovate and turfed us out. It feels like you have to scramble to find something, but don't, take a few weeks and really look for something nice. You don't want to have to move again in six months because you were panicked and jumped at the first available place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 25 October, 2016, 07:20:17 PM
that's crap staticgirl, we nearly faced losing our home a few years ago so can relate to that dropping out of your insides feeling, hope you get sorted soon if things get really desperate maybe shark could find you a corner in his shed but you'll have to provide your own beanbag.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 October, 2016, 07:22:23 PM
I do have a beanbag but you'll have to fight the dog for it.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 08:46:17 AM
The dvla have revoked my driving license based on information on how my eyes were 10 months ago, without contacting my doctor or me to find it was fully healed 6 months ago.

So I just got back well, full time and promoted and am now going to be in trouble because of a total fuck up on their part.  It can take months or years to get it back apparently even when there is nothing wrong,
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 October, 2016, 10:23:40 AM
There was something on the radio this week about this.  A parliamentary inquiry into incidence of the DVLA erroneously revoking licenses and the length of time / money it cost.  Some lass had around £30 000 in expenses reimbursed!  Hope it doesn't take anywhere near as long / cost as much!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 October, 2016, 10:26:35 AM
found it

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p04cl0vq (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p04cl0vq)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 26 October, 2016, 10:55:00 AM
I like cats, and was dismayed to see one get smacked by a car last night.  It twitched and hopped like a fish out of water and I thought I'd have to put it out of its misery, but was relieved that it stopped moving after a minute or so.  The driver, fair play to him, stopped and dragged it off the road, then started calling into the local houses to find its owner.

Not pleasant though, and an image that will stay with me for a long time.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 11:06:21 AM
Brilliant thanks for that Tmj.

Local radio and TV are on this now and my docs have provided all evidence that I am 100% well and yet they still cannot and will not give any idea as to time frames for this.

It will cost them if I lose my job, it's good to know I can claim back from them but it should never come to that for such spurious reasons.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 11:09:23 AM
Tjm not tmj sorry.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 26 October, 2016, 12:24:55 PM
Fishy, don't acknowledge their authority and just drive anyway. The DVLA are clearly in the wrong—no jury would take their side.

Easier to type than do I know...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 01:03:51 PM
The problem I would have there is that I would not be insured surely?

I would not want to from 'in the right' to criminal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 October, 2016, 01:07:01 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 11:06:21 AM
It will cost them if I lose my job, it's good to know I can claim back from them but it should never come to that for such spurious reasons.

You could inform them that you will be using taxis in place of driving for all work-related journeys and will be billing them for the expense...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 01:37:17 PM
Oh that is a great point Jim.  This surely is their liability as they have screwed up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 October, 2016, 01:39:01 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 11:09:23 AM
Tjm not tmj sorry.

Dim problem.  Also, the article shows precedent which will make your life easier following Jim's advice.  Worth a quick trip to CAB, get in touch with some ambulance chaser, get a letter with the medical update from your doctor showing when they assessed the improvements and then put it all in writing to the DVLA.  Worth citing the Today programme in your letter to the bar stewards.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 01:42:25 PM
Thank you.  I've made sure all the reports have gone through to them and have ensured that they have re-opened case.  My doctor has done a good and very clear letter.  Now I think I need to wait but call them every day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 26 October, 2016, 07:55:22 PM
Quote from: Banners on 26 October, 2016, 12:24:55 PM
Fishy, don't acknowledge their authority and just drive anyway. The DVLA are clearly in the wrong—no jury would take their side.

Easier to type than do I know...

I don't think it's that simple.  My dad once left his car with a mechanic, who drove it around town without his permission and double parked it - despite the judge knowing exactly what had happened, it was still my dad's car and he was fined.  The law isn't always about justice (now what comic strip does that remind me of?)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 26 October, 2016, 08:32:23 PM
That is true Jay.  I have now been on radio, tv, got doctors and surgeons letters to them and phoned three times for them to expedite getting them on file.  They have now re-opened the case. I have also written to my MP no made a formal complaint against their shambolic process.

My doctor says I 100% will drive as there is nothing wrong. I just don't want to risk it until I hear something.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 27 October, 2016, 11:30:20 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 26 October, 2016, 07:55:22 PM
Quote from: Banners on 26 October, 2016, 12:24:55 PM
Fishy, don't acknowledge their authority and just drive anyway. The DVLA are clearly in the wrong—no jury would take their side.

Easier to type than do I know...

I don't think it's that simple.  My dad once left his car with a mechanic, who drove it around town without his permission and double parked it - despite the judge knowing exactly what had happened, it was still my dad's car and he was fined.  The law isn't always about justice (now what comic strip does that remind me of?)

Isn't that basically Theft With Access to Keys? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TWOC
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 27 October, 2016, 02:29:03 PM
I'm not rightly sure.  Not the way the judge saw it, anyway, it would seem
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 27 October, 2016, 02:34:25 PM
Pfff. Shambles!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 27 October, 2016, 04:20:49 PM
Thanks for the sympathy and advice (and the link - 'life spugs' that was the thread I was trying to think of..) Yes the landlords want to refurbish it and rent it for hundreds of pounds more than I can afford.

I've crawled into work today and feel like death as I've not been eating much and when I do it hasn't been staying down. It's been better to get out of my poor doomed flat and see some people though.

I'm even thinking of moving away from this area completely but am doing research.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 October, 2016, 07:27:32 PM
My best to you, Stats. Who knows? There could be diamonds to be found in this shit.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 27 October, 2016, 09:16:14 PM
The Legendary Shark
This one has a caff on one side and a beauty salon on the other - builders' butts to my right and sunny-weather cleavages to my left. All levels of humanity existing cheek to cheek, as it were.
:'( Oh Sharky....that's.....just....just soooo sweet. Z  :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 October, 2016, 11:35:49 PM
Ode to a launderette, lol.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 October, 2016, 01:11:16 PM
Well the dvla have still rejected my doctors evidence I no longer have a problem.

So I am 100% healthy and my reward for it is a ban from driving for a condition I do not have.

Absolutely Insane.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 October, 2016, 01:15:18 PM
If your doctor says you're 100% okay, how dare some anonymous admin person say otherwise? That's why I would be tempted to drive anyway—you're being held hostage by artificial and intangible rules, when the actual truth of the matter is you should be entirely free to go about your business. Have you tried publicly bringing them to task on Twitter or Facebook?

Awful. Really hate this kind of systematic inhuman unfairness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 October, 2016, 01:21:50 PM
I fear doing that but I do wonder now.

My orthoptist hs very kindly agreed to see me urgently on Tuesday at 12.  She is going to measure that I have no diplopia and provide a letter there and then and fax it to the DVLA saying this is a fallacious issue.

If that doesn't work then they are acting criminally surely?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 28 October, 2016, 01:32:54 PM
Might not be "criminal"; more likely incompetent or unfair. Do you know the specific person responsible at the DVLA? If so, strike up a relationship—win them over.

If not, it's horrible being held hostage like this, which is why—if you know you're in the right and can back that up—I would be tempted to drive anyway. If it's not a big deal and you can get lifts or use public transport (keeping receipts of course), wait it out. But sometimes you have to be naughty to do what's right—sometimes it's better to ask for forgiveness rather than permission.

What's your employer saying? Hopefully they're sympathetic and are reassuring you that your job isn't in any danger?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 28 October, 2016, 04:36:10 PM
Have they given a reason for the rejection?  Surely they need to have some sort of medical evidence to back up their decision.  Actually, this is the crux of the problem at the moment isn't it?  That said, surely this gives you room for manoeuvre.  Have you discussed this with CAB / lawyer yet?  Daft question but do you have a union at work?  If so that would be a potential avenue of support.  You might also want to get in touch with your MP, citing the recent findings in the HOC on the issue.

I would agree that the prudent course is to abide by the ban for now, despite the temptation to give in to the colossal unfairness of it all.  Granted that there are a significant number of unlicensed / uninsured drivers on British roads these days but Murphys Law dictates that you end up being the one picked up and it harms your case.  How sympathetic / understanding / flexible is your employer likely to be?

Sorry, wish I could suggest something more constructive.   :|
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 October, 2016, 05:29:40 PM
I would write to the Head of the DVLA telling him/her that I am going to continue to drive until he/she proves I am unfit to do so. I'd make it clear that I hold him/her personally responsible for the DVLA's decisions and give him/her a month to clear this up. If, once that month has passed, nothing has been done, then I'll be charging him/her £25 per day until the issue is concluded satisfactorily.

But that's just me. It's also why I live in a shed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 October, 2016, 05:41:11 PM
banners, sadly they give you no access to a named case worker and simply refuse to talk to you or help you.

The only breakthrough I've had at all is my doctor doing a new letter stating explicitally that I do not have diplopia and was cleared months ago by my orthoptist.  They had faxed it and my MP has also sent to to their direct contact to expedite this at the DVLA.

Hopefully they will see this evidence of no problem as a reason to clear me as I have no problem.

I am also doing this consultation on Tuesday to get a fresh set of measurements to prove without doubt they are talking crap (which was already proven earlier this year anyway) and my orthoptist is happy to do a fax right there bless her).

If this doesn't work then I am stumped.. removed from driving for an issue I am proven not to have.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 October, 2016, 05:43:55 PM
Also some good idea tm and Sharky.

I think the more people I can get involved the better. 

They did indeed do this with no evidence.  It's fucking ridiculous.  But now total evidence is needed to reverse it.   Which they no have.

It's not a good process is it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trent on 28 October, 2016, 06:00:22 PM
Gaah. Changed my chemo regime on Thursday and was expecting nurse over tomorrow to remove my 48 hour pump infuser. Now the hospital calls to say there was a cock up and nothing else to do but go back to them. That's a 4 hour round trip (minimum) for a 5 minute procedure some time tomorrow and I have family arriving for the weekend in the next hour.
Buggerations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 28 October, 2016, 06:03:47 PM
buggerations indeed, considering how shit chemo makes you feel the last thing you need is all that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 October, 2016, 08:25:38 PM
Sorry to hear that Trent.  Not what you need.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 29 October, 2016, 12:13:25 PM
I hope it all went well for you Trent.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 29 October, 2016, 12:49:35 PM
Someone I know from the pool/blackball circuit has just died!!!! :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 29 October, 2016, 10:49:00 PM
Quote from: Trent on 28 October, 2016, 06:00:22 PM
Gaah. Changed my chemo regime on Thursday and was expecting nurse over tomorrow to remove my 48 hour pump infuser. Now the hospital calls to say there was a cock up and nothing else to do but go back to them. That's a 4 hour round trip (minimum) for a 5 minute procedure some time tomorrow and I have family arriving for the weekend in the next hour.
Buggerations.

Sorry to hear that, Trent. Hope it gets sorted!  My mate who has cancer asked me to be his best man yesterday; we're just hoping he won't have a bad turn coming up to the day itself.  Also he has a Peaky Blinders hat in mind in case he gets chemo again coming up to the big day.

Also, sorry to hear of your loss, BSC.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 31 October, 2016, 09:32:36 AM
Sorry to hear that Bsc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 31 October, 2016, 02:46:47 PM
this may be an impediment...too early to say, our neighbour pam has apparently sold up and moved and didn't tell anyone! our new neighbours so far look miserable but he looks like nigel marven the famous naturalist! time will tell...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 01 November, 2016, 06:42:58 PM
Some better news on the dvla front.  Following a full report from my orthoptist today they have accepted I am well and cleared to reapply.  My MP is also going to oversee it being expedited so the application will be way quicker than the more than a month it can take.   I am told a week or so should do as I have faxed all the forms directly to the Mp's office.

That's finally some good progress.  I'm very glad I fought this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 01 November, 2016, 07:05:45 PM
That's great news.  Glad to see an MP doing something useful for a constituent for a change.  Will still be keeping our fingers crossed that it does go through okay and swiftly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 01 November, 2016, 07:32:52 PM
Yeah indeed, I will celebrate once it's all through. I've been told though it's just process from here now I am medically cleared and that it will go through.  Apparently it's just about getting them to do it quickly.

Fingers crossed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 01 November, 2016, 10:26:20 PM
Best of luck, Fishy.  Either way, it only feels like a few months since you were sure your eyesight was gone forever; now you're pushing your MP to get you back behind the wheel.  Sweet!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 01 November, 2016, 10:46:13 PM
True that.  Silly thing is I have been driving ever since the eyes got well and only now have the gone and done this.

But yeah, compared to where I thought I would be this is only a temporary hiccup.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 November, 2016, 02:53:13 PM
Good news, they have now approved and reissued my license.  I should have it within a few days.   What a relief.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 02 November, 2016, 03:21:53 PM
Wonderful news Fishy! Nice to see it didn't take months to sort out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 November, 2016, 03:56:33 PM
Thank you.

Yeah that was the stuck response form staff always.  No timeframe. It will take how long it takes.

But once it got escalated becaus it was wrong I did notice a change in what I was being told.  Since the clearance yesterday it all raced past.

I think the worst moment was when first phoning them after getting the letter, the operative seemed to be relishing in it and was very unpleasant.   You'd think a bit of sensitivity when people have had such shock news would be part of their training.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 November, 2016, 04:45:10 PM
And that was riddled with typos   :-[

'Stock response from staff" for a start.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 02 November, 2016, 06:48:48 PM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 02 November, 2016, 02:53:13 PM
Good news, they have now approved and reissued my license.  I should have it within a few days.   What a relief.

Cool!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 November, 2016, 06:57:18 PM
Certainly show that you get a lot further if you stand your ground and make use of all the resources you can.

I hate to think how many people just take their word for it and go off road for good or who simply don't realise they could get support and spend months exchanging postal communications with no result.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Taryn Tailz on 02 November, 2016, 08:52:42 PM
Eurgh...have to attend a health assessment in three weeks time to prove that I'm not merely pretending to have a chronic health condition, presumably in some kind of diabolical plan involving several corrupt GP's who have already diagnosed me with the condition.
I'm a pessimist at heart, so I'm just automatically assuming I'm gonna be refused and then forced to enter the workhouse, breaking stones or whatever the Tories latest cutting edge thinking is.

It's extra annoying because I'm gonna be having my second appointment with the Gender Identity Clinic nine days after that, which I've been really looking forward to since the first appointment went so well. Now I've got this massive road block thrown in my way before I get to that appointment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 05 November, 2016, 02:30:00 PM
hope all goes well lass,

meanwhile at grug block...

the new neighbour turns out to not be, a TO LET sign is on next door so now in my current mental health state is panicking and thinking the worst , am I going to be on a channel 5 documentary soon???

   having said that Stacey,if you still haven't found somewhere, theres a house up/down in quiet Leyland Lancashire ,and the neighbours are lovlley!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 07 November, 2016, 10:36:54 AM
Why a C5 documentary?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 07 November, 2016, 11:31:02 PM
I was thinking of one of the nightmare neighbours on drug addled benefit funded all night raves ones...  might not get them but you cant help worrying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 10 November, 2016, 11:52:24 AM
Grugz- as long as you keep the noise down then the new neighbour probably won't shop you to C5...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 10 November, 2016, 04:32:08 PM
ba dum tish!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 November, 2016, 06:23:12 PM
Emotions. They're a nasty thing, eh? Just come to the conclusion I wont have enough money (nor will they) to go and visit my immediate family for christmas. It's not that I much care for the holiday anyway, it's more the fact i've just realized how much I miss them. Skype and calling helps, but i'm a soppy bugger and it's making me feel a bit sad really.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 November, 2016, 07:21:18 PM
That's not a bad problem to have, Hawkie. I live within walking distance of my family but the trouble is, they all hate me.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 November, 2016, 07:15:08 PM
Feeling depressed, Went out to Newcastle last night with a mate to meet up with this girl he's seeing and her mates for one of their Birthday's. Instead, we all ended up standing as close to the DJ booth as humanely possible in an overcrowded club, with NONE of her mates remotely interested in talking to me, I was basically treated like an immature child AND imbecile by my so-called mate and his female friend, I had to wait nearly an hour for a taxi with them (despite assurances that I would be sharing a taxi with three of her mates, but couldn't because there wasn't any space for me DESPITE the taxi having five-seats). Oh, and during the wait for the taxi, I discovered the real reason for his offer of a night out: It was to make his relationship with her OFFICIAL, and while sharing a taxi with them, they were constantly snogging. AND he call's himself my friend, knowing I suffer from Asperger's WHO hasn't had a girlfriend since First School (I'm 31). As a result of all this, I can't stop obsessing about last night. I feel so sad, lonely & depressed right now!!! :'( :'( :'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 November, 2016, 08:23:49 PM
Ach Batson, that's a serious pain of a night out, but to be honest, I think we've ALL been the spare wheel on some endless evening like that.  Your friend shouldn't have carried on like a pratt, but love (and drink) makes fools of us all: what is important is that your mate obviously cares enough about you that he wants to introduce you and involve you in the new social circle that comes with what may be a serious relationship for him.

Maybe he could have done it more sensitively given your specific situation, but I'd be certain he brought you along because you're important to him, not because he wanted to rub your nose in it. That's a good thing, even if the evening in question was a disaster for you. The self-absorbed lovey-dovey shite will pass, and friends of friends of friends aren't always the easiest company under any circumstances (several of my friends and my wife's friends have never got on, for example - but we work around it). Things will improve, I'm sure.




Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 27 November, 2016, 09:44:59 PM
In all honesty, and with all due respect to you you Tordleback, I can't forgive him for this. He only just met her a day after a failed relationship, and on the night of causing a ruckus amongst our fellow group of friends (who are part of the local Pool League). The "ruckus" was him trying to join our team after a lengthy absence by convincing one of our Co-Captain's to oust the "weaker member(s)" (an act he claims that he didn't instigate, even though it's widely known amongst ourselves that he did).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 November, 2016, 01:25:54 AM
If the guy is in the habit of being a dickhead, maybe you're better off steering clear.  It's obviously impossible to judge from here, I just meant to reassure that the "boring awkward night of hanging about like a tulip while mate snogs new girlfriend incessantly and her friends ignore you" is a pretty common experience (i've been both victim and perpetrator at different times), and not necessarily something directed at you or a permanent change.  But if it's part of a pattern of bullying or disruptive behaviour, that's a different story.  Either way, my sympathies, not pleasant.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 28 November, 2016, 08:12:52 AM
there's someone out there for everyone,i always believed that,hope you meet yours soon batson.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 28 November, 2016, 10:46:22 AM
Hawkmumbler - that's very shitty - I assume your family can't help you and live a long way away from them. I don't know how I'd cope if I couldn't see my mum on special occasions like Xmas. Even with what I am going through right now I am at least able to pop up and see them for a couple of days so I suddenly feel very fortunate. You have my deepest sympathies.

BSC - Your mate doesn't sound much like a mate if there is a pattern like this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 28 November, 2016, 11:16:12 AM
It's only recently that he's been acting like this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Satanist on 28 November, 2016, 12:00:14 PM
Its amazing how the promise of boobs will change a blokes priorities, hence the not very subtle term "bro's before ho's".

Just let them get on with it and if the relationship goes tits up he'll be back and sorry and if not at least you can get on with your life.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: CrazyFoxMachine on 28 November, 2016, 05:54:24 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 28 November, 2016, 01:25:54 AMhanging about like a tulip

is a wonderful turn of phrase. I want that framed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 29 November, 2016, 08:48:31 AM
school sent mini grugz home on Thursday,she'd been feeling ill for a couple of days but she soldiered on...yesterday I got a call from the safeguarding lead bleating on about her attendance being less than 90% and wanting a meeting...she also wants proof my lass is ill!  (she has a virus,not as bad as flu but with a temp of 38.9) apparently parental word isn't good enough so I have had to spend half an hour arguing with a receptionist to get an appointment for her . She's their best student in year 7 being in all the top sets and loves school despite her problems with a teacher in yr 6 ,I just don't want this affecting her and feel like we're being accused of something with this teachers attitude...my lass did suggest we collect the phlegm and diaherrea (sic)  and present it to the teacher as the proof she wants.(that's my girl!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 29 November, 2016, 07:47:03 PM
This is the absolute bonkers thing about the current attendance campaign across schools.  It continues to target the wrong folks and over scrupulous application of the rules makes for a nightmare.  The schools are stuck between a rock and a hard place but a bit of common sense wouldn't go amiss, not to mention some understanding for parents situations. Trying to get past the rotweillers at the GP doesn't help either.  I think I read somewhere recently that most folks are put off their GP by the reception staff.

The only problem is that this early in the year it doesn't take much to dip below 90%.  At ten weeks in that's 50 days.  If you miss a week now that puts you in the frame.  Do it in February and it wouldn't flag anything yet it is the same amount of time off school. 

I like her suggestion mind.  I was going to suggest the vomit as well.  Perhaps all mixed together?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 30 November, 2016, 11:20:22 AM
Quote from: Satanist on 28 November, 2016, 12:00:14 PM
Its amazing how the promise of boobs will change a blokes priorities, hence the not very subtle term "bro's before ho's".

Just let them get on with it and if the relationship goes tits up he'll be back and sorry and if not at least you can get on with your life.

True. One of my best friends (who I've known since we were about 4 years old) is an incredibly decent and helpful person who has helped me out of tight spots more times than I can remember.  Put a new woman and some booze on the scene, though, and he'll gladly put me down with snide remarks, talk over me and generally try to play the alpha role by making me beta.

It hasn't been a problem for a long time -  he was in a steady relationship. But he isn't now and this trait is showing signs of rearing its head again. I think it's completely unconscious on his part but if it happens again I'll  be having words.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 November, 2016, 04:34:09 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 29 November, 2016, 07:47:03 PM
This is the absolute bonkers thing about the current attendance campaign across schools.  It continues to target the wrong folks and over scrupulous application of the rules makes for a nightmare.  The schools are stuck between a rock and a hard place but a bit of common sense wouldn't go amiss, not to mention some understanding for parents situations. Trying to get past the rotweillers at the GP doesn't help either.  I think I read somewhere recently that most folks are put off their GP by the reception staff.

The only problem is that this early in the year it doesn't take much to dip below 90%.  At ten weeks in that's 50 days.  If you miss a week now that puts you in the frame.  Do it in February and it wouldn't flag anything yet it is the same amount of time off school. 

I like her suggestion mind.  I was going to suggest the vomit as well.  Perhaps all mixed together?


   the stupid thing is they sent her home ill and want me to prove it!!!  she has a viral infection of the upper respiratory tract luckily not bacterial so no need for antibiotics ,luckily shes clever so will catch up quickly...

mother in law continues to deteriorate, she has a full blown chest infection and has been falling again so we're worried about her ...and as she's housebound now we're taking Christmas to her this year pre-cook the turkey and prep the veg no problem!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 30 November, 2016, 05:28:58 PM
That sounds seriously like the left hand and right hand don't know what they're doing.  Worth calling them on that.  It's also worth bearing in mind that they're good at bluster but will back off from 'awkward parents'.  School seniors management will never take on parents they don't think will roll over.   Stand your ground and get them to cite where your nipper is not making the progress she should be.  If they do mention anything then get them to detail what needs to be done to address it.  Most importantly, be reasonable.  They can't cope with that at all.  They expect stroppy but get thrown by calm and cooperative.

On the mother in law front you have my sympathies.  If she is anything like my mother in law then it must be truly heart wrenching.  Here's hoping for a turn for the better.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 30 November, 2016, 06:22:23 PM
cheers, mum in law is brilliant, i'm closer to her than me own. school will find me not backing down,i left a lot alone in yr 6 just not to give them an excuse to take it out on my lass.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 01 December, 2016, 09:02:13 AM
Resaonableness and knowing your facts will get you much further than confrontation with schools.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 01 December, 2016, 11:08:28 AM
oh i know bolt, i'll be as charming as owt , but I just wont accept their dishing out of penalties.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trent on 09 December, 2016, 01:15:02 PM
Was in a car crash with my wife and son yesterdsy. Not his fault at all and they are both okay.
I was in the back and took the brunt of it - they had to cut the roof off to get me out.
Anyway, broken arm, hip and ribs so I'm in Predton for at least a couple of weeks.
Not quite the Christmas I had planned......
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 09 December, 2016, 01:22:41 PM
Good grief, that's an ordeal... sorry to hear that Trent. Hope you're recovered soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 09 December, 2016, 01:51:44 PM
The injuries are nothing compared to the horror that is being trapped in Preston for two weeks!  :o

Al the best Trent, get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 09 December, 2016, 02:55:42 PM
Feck that Trent, that's all you need. Glad your loved ones were okay, but sorry to hear you got such a whack. Hope they're treating you well there.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 December, 2016, 03:10:53 PM
Bloody Hell, Trent, sorry to hear about your injuries but glad it wasn't worse. All the best wishes for a swift recovery.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trent on 09 December, 2016, 04:19:15 PM
On the plus side, my wife turned up with the Christmas prog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 09 December, 2016, 05:07:12 PM
Quote from: Trent on 09 December, 2016, 04:19:15 PM
On the plus side, my wife turned up with the Christmas prog.

That's the spirit!  :D

But yikes...
Sorry to hear this news, and I wish you a swift recovery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 09 December, 2016, 05:56:11 PM
That's a nasty thing to happen Trent. I hope you're recovering okay. You seem to have the right attitude anyway. I'm glad things were not worse. All the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 09 December, 2016, 10:47:13 PM
Ooh, nasty. Still, could have been a whole lot worse. Get well soon, lad
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 10 December, 2016, 11:00:39 AM
Sorry to hear that Trent.  Very glad you came through the it.   Good luck in your recovery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 10 December, 2016, 11:22:50 AM
Very sorry to hear about your accident Trent. Hope you have a speedy recovery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 10 December, 2016, 04:39:14 PM
Good grud I hope you get well fast. I'm glad you're all okay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 December, 2016, 08:48:30 AM
Just been informed by my driving instructor that after a near accident scenario in my last lesson that he will not be continuing with my driving lessons.

Well now I feel like a right failure.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 December, 2016, 09:56:00 AM
Sounds like he's the failure in that situation, Hawkie, not you.  Not every instructor is right for everyone, find another. Keep at lad, like most things it's all about practice, practice, practice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 December, 2016, 01:21:14 PM
I'm with Tordelback Block on this. Unless you were deliberately trying to have an accident (which I seriously doubt), Hawkie, then it's your driving instructor who's failed here. It's a good thing you've found out how poor an instructor he is because now you can get a better one.

In my day, back when the mists of time were little more than a few drops of condensation dribbling down the spout of the kettle of eternity, driving instructors were all either made of sterner stuff or perpetually drunk, or both. And cars back then were about as safe as Windows 98, too. For example, there was a tale (possibly, or probably, an urban myth) that if you dented one of a Ford Capri's body panels in just the right place it put enough strain on the structural integrity of the vehicle to actually bend the chassis. You could achieve this, it was said, with your hand and a grunt. Other cars had dodgy window winders so you couldn't wind your window all the way to the top, or had to bugger about to get it to sit straight, or watch in resigned frustration as the glass fell off the winder and thumped down into the depths of the door, which would then begin to stick on opening because the errant pane was interfering with something important but loose. But the door panels were easy to remove, being mostly on the verge of falling off anyway, so you could get to the mechanism and put it back together only to see the window jam shut or tumble loose again the first time you slam the door.

Wheels used to fall off, bumpers became entangled with each other, at speeds of over 28mph airflow passing over the windscreen would lift the windscreen wipers 0.15mm away from the glass, sunroofs leaked even when it wasn't raining and played host to myriad species of lichen and moss, they belched lead-laden fumes into the driver's face through the heater vents and jumped at any opportunity to go on fire or stick a leg out of bed. The heaters didn't, the brakes couldn't, the lights might and the washers never did.

Accidents were worse back then because cars tended to be falling to bits even before banging into things. Near accidents were correspondingly worse because, even though you might avoid a collision, the act of slamming on your brakes (which at the time was largely dependent on body-weight and thigh-strength) could alter the shape of your vehicle, causing the windscreen to ping out and shatter all over the road, resulting in old ladies waving handbags and walking sticks at you and shouting curse words you thought only dock workers knew.

Modern cars are much safer, therefore your ex-instructor is a wuss.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 12 December, 2016, 01:37:16 PM
TB's right on this one, I went through a couple of them, and was getting nowhere, that all said that I could drive fine,  and just needed to 'brush up'  ::)

Found an ex-bus driver instructor whose brain worked like mine, and it all gelled perfectly.

So dump the plonker and get someone who know WTF they are doing....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 12 December, 2016, 01:45:02 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 12 December, 2016, 01:21:14 PM
I'm with Tordelback Block on this.

You trying to tell me we haven't coined the phrase "Tordel-Block" yet?
Of course our friends are correct Hawk- take your business elsewhere.
Ask around locally for a recommended instructor with a dual control vehicle.

Nasty news there Trent- wishing you a speedy recovery.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 December, 2016, 01:50:53 PM
I had a friend who had 12 accidents or near-misses in 14 lessons before their instructor gave up on them and asked them to look elsewhere!

One of them was the classic "go straight on at the roundabout" - which apparently does not mean drive onto the middle of it and stop. Another was an instruction to take the next left - which did not mean "crash through the five bar gate just before the junction"
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 December, 2016, 01:57:55 PM
Friend, eh? ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 December, 2016, 02:06:33 PM
True! She was the barmaid in my local.

I did take 3 attempts to pass though - on the 2nd attempt (in my instructor's dual-control car), the examiner had to stamp on the brakes to stop me clipping a parked car whilst pulling away from the test centre!

Only passed the 3rd time because I'd spent a few weeks acting as my mum's chauffeur and delivery driver to get some practice in!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 December, 2016, 02:07:47 PM
Aye, cheers chaps. That makes me feel a little less of a plum.

Have found a new instructor, who by no small coincidence is also an ex-HGV driver, so when I explained the situation he was all to sympathetic and happy to help. Slightly more expensive per lesson but it's a price hopefully worth paying.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 12 December, 2016, 02:25:45 PM
Sage advice above, your ex-instructor doesn't inspire confidence at all...

Old cars are/were shit, as Sharky describes. I've personally tried to wind the window down on a deeply snowy day, to have the pane fall neatly into the door itself, never to be seen (through) again. Once you've passed, Hawk, cars will continue to test you...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 December, 2016, 02:33:43 PM
No need to feel a plum at all, Hawkie. Learning to drive is hard; there's a lot to remember, a lot of controls to master and lot of hand-eye-ear-foot coordination to get on top of. Then, as well as that, you have to deal with all the crazy people around you. It's definitely not easy but it definitely does get easier.

It might help to keep in mind what George Carlin (?) said: "There are only two types of drivers; maniacs and idiots. Maniacs are all those who drive faster than me and idiots are all those who drive slower than me."

I'm one of those insufferable people who passed first time and likes to mention it whenever the topic arises, which it has, so I will. I passed first time because I grew up in a small village with a truck driver/mechanic for a father who basically taught me to drive from the outset. If I'd been capable of it, he'd have had me sat on his knee steering the car home from the maternity hospital while he did the pedals and gears.

Do people still do that? Sit their children on their knees and let them steer down farm tracks, along beaches or over deserted Sunday morning car parks? I used to love that when I was a nipper.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 December, 2016, 02:52:59 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 12 December, 2016, 02:33:43 PM
Do people still do that? Sit their children on their knees and let them steer down farm tracks, along beaches or over deserted Sunday morning car parks? I used to love that when I was a nipper.

I learned the basics on Southport beach when I was about 12-13- I'm sure Sharky knows it, but for anyone who's never been to there, it 's a vast flat beach - it's a rarity if you ever get to see the sea it's usually so far out! I thought my dad was being a killjoy when he wouldn't let me swerve around flattening sand-castles until he pointed out that mischievous souls have been known to build them around the stumps of groyne-posts to catch out people who try that.

And Fungus, I've known the "window falling in to the door" scenario - in my mate's mini clubman* when we were living just outside Dundee in Winter - brrrr. That car finally died after the battery, which was oddly located under the back seat, moved a bit so that the metal edges of the seat was short-circuiting the  terminals.When the battery acid started boiling and steaming, we dived out and watched the car burst in to flames by the side of the Forfar road.

*It wasn't so much as a car as a radio on wheels - a £50 banger with a £400 stereo!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 12 December, 2016, 03:33:22 PM
Hawks, I can't remember - are you around Manchester? If so I can get the number of a good driving instructor off my mate (if he can pass anyone can).

I failed my driving test twice - once for stalling at a roundabout and the other for driving down a road with no signs at the speed of 30mph, which turned out to have a 50mph limit. Sadly I'm not psychic. Still seems like bullshit to me as the self-same driving examiner passed a girl I knew who failed the emergency stops and stamped on the accelerator and the clutch rather than the brakes.

And once you've passed you're free to drive around like all the other numpties anyway.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 12 December, 2016, 04:48:16 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 12 December, 2016, 02:52:59 PM
Dundee in Winter - brrrr.

I'm from Dundee and emigrated. it has been snowing in Toronto. I've just had my annual moment of self-doubt. WHYYYYY?

Anyway, Hawkperson, just hang in there. You get through it. I once failed a driving test because I had a cold and was sneezing so much that I couldn't steer properly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 December, 2016, 07:14:44 PM
So DDD, myself and Red Rum all trained on Southport beach. Keep that factoid in mind, kids, in case there one day arises a Forum Trivia Quiz...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 12 December, 2016, 07:51:41 PM
I registered with an agency today for some upcoming work. That's not the impediment. The pay could be better, and the hours are longer than I hoped, but at least it's a) better than I used to get in my permanent* job, b) they pay time and a half for overtime, and c)it's not that far from home. D)  While technically temp, it's long term which means a minimum of 3 months with a strong chance of extension and even permanent work. In fact this is probably a candidate for the 'life is sometimes sort of okay...." thread. Or even the most positive one...

The impediment is that I was required to sign a form giving them permission to take withdraw a portion of my wages to pay for my CRB check.

I don't mind them doing the check, but if they want it, I think they should pay for it. When I didn't sign the form, the lady said that it wasn't for the company. It was for me, and I could take it elsewhere.

Well, I understand that, but in the end they required for it to be made.

I went ahead in the end, as I need the work, and I'm rather feeling the pinch even selling stuff to pay for bills and travel money. Which makes it all the more annoying.

I know this is standard practice but it really feels like they're taking the micky. I guess the amount  they're taking isn't much in the scheme of things, but it feels sizable to me right now.

But hey, it looks like I'll be working soon, and that's more than many can say.

*Which didn't turn out so permanent, but it lasted almost 5 years which is better than some.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 12 December, 2016, 09:27:57 PM
I was shouted at by the examiner at the start of my driving test. As it seemed to be a lost cause, I thought "ok, let's get this over with" so I was relaxed for the rest of the test. And I passed. First time.

And haven't driven since. Really need to get back into it. I will need what will be my third round of refresher lessons.

Have mixed feelings about driving though as I think my fitness has benefitted by not having a car.   

Quote from: Dandontdare on 12 December, 2016, 02:52:59 PM
...we dived out and watched the car burst in to flames by the side of the Forfar road.
I once had to bail out of a car that burst into flames. Scary stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 14 December, 2016, 07:51:06 PM
Really need some luck next few days. After 7 months out of job I maybe found a freelance job but not hear from government dept's decision on I get Access to Work fund for interpreters! If no, then no job!  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 14 December, 2016, 09:49:36 PM
Quote from: Goaty on 14 December, 2016, 07:51:06 PM
Really need some luck next few days. After 7 months out of job I maybe found a freelance job but not hear from government dept's decision on I get Access to Work fund for interpreters! If no, then no job!  :(

Goood luck Goaty - A friend of mine bettled for months with Access to Work. She 's a psychiatric nurse who is gradually losing her hearing (she has an experimental hearing aid which involves an implanted plate in her head and a hearing aid that sticks on it like a fridge-magnet) . She was expected to just get on with her job for over a year, taking phone calls conducting interviews etc, whilst being hardly able to hear. However, I think a lot of it was down to the health trust she worked for rather than AtoW itself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Steve Green on 14 December, 2016, 11:07:18 PM
Good luck with it Goaty!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 15 December, 2016, 09:54:12 AM
Good luck Goaty!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 15 December, 2016, 10:44:44 AM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 14 December, 2016, 09:49:36 PM
Goood luck Goaty - A friend of mine bettled for months with Access to Work. She 's a psychiatric nurse who is gradually losing her hearing (she has an experimental hearing aid which involves an implanted plate in her head and a hearing aid that sticks on it like a fridge-magnet) . She was expected to just get on with her job for over a year, taking phone calls conducting interviews etc, whilst being hardly able to hear. However, I think a lot of it was down to the health trust she worked for rather than AtoW itself.

Thanks Dare, yeah can understand with your friend and she got Cochlear implant, or CI as my wife does.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 December, 2016, 03:55:36 PM
It wasn't a cochlear implant or a bone-anchored hearing aid, but something new - I think she was only the 3rd person in the country to have it and she keeps getting invited to follow-ups as a guinea pig
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 15 December, 2016, 04:13:48 PM
I think THIS (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2700606/ME-AND-MY-OPERATION-Magnetic-hearing-aid-sticks-head.html) was it - it's called a Bonebridge hearing aid (apologies linking to the Daily Fail, but it's the only mention I can find!)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 15 December, 2016, 05:49:44 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 12 December, 2016, 07:51:41 PM
I registered with an agency today for some upcoming work. That's not the impediment. The pay could be better, and the hours are longer than I hoped, but at least it's a) better than I used to get in my permanent* job, b) they pay time and a half for overtime, and c)it's not that far from home. D)  While technically temp, it's long term which means a minimum of 3 months with a strong chance of extension and even permanent work. In fact this is probably a candidate for the 'life is sometimes sort of okay...." thread. Or even the most positive one...

The impediment is that I was required to sign a form giving them permission to take withdraw a portion of my wages to pay for my CRB check.

I don't mind them doing the check, but if they want it, I think they should pay for it. When I didn't sign the form, the lady said that it wasn't for the company. It was for me, and I could take it elsewhere.

Well, I understand that, but in the end they required for it to be made.

I went ahead in the end, as I need the work, and I'm rather feeling the pinch even selling stuff to pay for bills and travel money. Which makes it all the more annoying.

I know this is standard practice but it really feels like they're taking the micky. I guess the amount  they're taking isn't much in the scheme of things, but it feels sizable to me right now.

But hey, it looks like I'll be working soon, and that's more than many can say.

*Which didn't turn out so permanent, but it lasted almost 5 years which is better than some.


  you have to pay now?  as I always understood it you have to get rechecked if you start a different job, when I worked in my last job I had one and had the opportunity to do some passenger assistant work taking the little mites home which would have been handy as I didn't then have to fork out for bus fare...but they wanted me to go through all the rigramole of getting another check even though mine was only just renewed which wasn't worth it for the day or two extra work.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 15 December, 2016, 07:24:51 PM
Good luck Goaty.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 December, 2016, 07:41:52 PM
How about doing some part time work until you get a chance to go for what you actually want!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 16 December, 2016, 06:59:55 PM
Quote from: COMMANDO FORCES on 15 December, 2016, 07:41:52 PM
How about doing some part time work until you get a chance to go for what you actually want!

Yeah that's what I been try last seven months!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Spikes on 16 December, 2016, 07:46:16 PM
Quote from: Grugz on 15 December, 2016, 05:49:44 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 12 December, 2016, 07:51:41 PM
I registered with an agency today for some upcoming work. That's not the impediment. The pay could be better, and the hours are longer than I hoped, but at least it's a) better than I used to get in my permanent* job, b) they pay time and a half for overtime, and c)it's not that far from home. D)  While technically temp, it's long term which means a minimum of 3 months with a strong chance of extension and even permanent work. In fact this is probably a candidate for the 'life is sometimes sort of okay...." thread. Or even the most positive one...

The impediment is that I was required to sign a form giving them permission to take withdraw a portion of my wages to pay for my CRB check.

I don't mind them doing the check, but if they want it, I think they should pay for it. When I didn't sign the form, the lady said that it wasn't for the company. It was for me, and I could take it elsewhere.

Well, I understand that, but in the end they required for it to be made.

I went ahead in the end, as I need the work, and I'm rather feeling the pinch even selling stuff to pay for bills and travel money. Which makes it all the more annoying.

I know this is standard practice but it really feels like they're taking the micky. I guess the amount  they're taking isn't much in the scheme of things, but it feels sizable to me right now.

But hey, it looks like I'll be working soon, and that's more than many can say.

*Which didn't turn out so permanent, but it lasted almost 5 years which is better than some.


  you have to pay now?  as I always understood it you have to get rechecked if you start a different job, when I worked in my last job I had one and had the opportunity to do some passenger assistant work taking the little mites home which would have been handy as I didn't then have to fork out for bus fare...but they wanted me to go through all the rigramole of getting another check even though mine was only just renewed which wasn't worth it for the day or two extra work.


Not cheap are they. And I sympathise with people who do have to pay for them.
At my place of work (Local Government Authority) I get any checks, and renewals, paid for.
Though it would seem that new agency/temp workers have to pay for their own now.

Though CRB checks now do not have an expiry date, in the real world (the council isn't the real world, believe me...) It seems that employers can state whether or not you need to get a renewal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 17 December, 2016, 08:40:56 PM
Quote from: grugzyou have to pay now?
No, they take it out of my wages in two installments. There's that at least.

I'm assuming they'll pay for it then claim it back off me.

That's worrying news that companies might require a new one. I guess it's understandable as I might have committed a crime in the time in between, but it's a bit much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 18 December, 2016, 08:16:13 AM
How much is it ?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 18 December, 2016, 10:41:06 PM
Quote from: Old Tankie on 18 December, 2016, 08:16:13 AM
How much is it ?

I forget the exact figure but I think it's around £41-£42

So 2 payments of £20.

Not really a whole lot I suppose considering some costs. It's just when you're feeling the pinch a bit, and sold a couple of things to bring in money, then the next job wants to take £42 out of your wages just like that (and the wages aren't great, but above minimum, so I guess there's that) it's rather irritating.  Like a bit more extra tax, I guess. Heh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 19 December, 2016, 09:31:34 PM
I often mention here how incredibly busy I am. Don't think it is a case of me getting rich – a lot of my work has gone from getting paid next-to-nothing to literally nothing.

Had a massive freebie project on. Did two weeks solid of insanely long days and nights. Which means I have been left with one week to do all Xmas prep. I had the nerve to think I could meet a friend today as I don't have time for things like socialising throughout the year. As it's the Xmas season I dared to think I could squeeze in a coffee with a friend. Plan was to come back and start my advent calendar piece. I've done a very small doodle so far. After meeting my friend I went to pick up a present and opened my email to get the code. I had an email from people I do the real work for, to tell me tomorrow is their deadline to get invoices in to their accounts department. Oh, it's only a few days before Xmas – I don't have much to do, do I?

The same people did the same to me a few years ago three days before we moved. On my way out: "oh, can I have your invoices the deadline is..."

So forum advent calendar or invoices?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 December, 2016, 04:49:44 AM
Invoices with doodles of Tharg in a Santa hat on them.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 December, 2016, 09:22:01 AM
Well, they finally did it. My parents threw my prog collection in the bin behind my back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 20 December, 2016, 09:26:36 AM
Oh, so you're an orphan now?

Did they take your collection with them when they moved?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 December, 2016, 09:42:08 AM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 20 December, 2016, 09:26:36 AM
Oh, so you're an orphan now?

Did they take your collection with them when they moved?
Nah, they came over this weekend just past to see some estate agents about the 'old' house. Put progs where in the attic, now in a skip somewhere outside Wigan!

On the plus side, I saved the valuable ones, to me at least. The first half a dozen of them, the 35th Anniversary progs, FCBD progs and end of year bumper progs. The rest, 3 years worth of progs, megs and floppies, gone to the great long box in the sky. Seeing as I switched to digital in 2014 though, it's not like I lost all my back issues.

It also means I can dip into the Absalom, Low Life, and Dante trades without feeling like I'm double dipping!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 20 December, 2016, 10:55:02 AM
woke this morning to a flooded kitchen, the inlet hose for the washer was gushing even though we only had the heating on...went out to but a new hose and heard a noise in the kitchen thinking it was leaking somewhere i'd missed I went to check and there was a little fuzzy bastard under the sink he made his escape and he's gotten in under the bricks outside and he appears to have nested in the back of my wifes very expensive leather recliner in the conservatory as we normally...used to leave it open for the mutt to go in and out to pee,bark at seagulls,etc  so weve got some poison and the wifes off to find a car boot full of traps.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 20 December, 2016, 12:17:57 PM
That's all you need just before Christmas! Keep smiling mate.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 December, 2016, 12:56:13 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 15 December, 2016, 04:13:48 PM
I think THIS (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2700606/ME-AND-MY-OPERATION-Magnetic-hearing-aid-sticks-head.html) was it - it's called a Bonebridge hearing aid (apologies linking to the Daily Fail, but it's the only mention I can find!)




Always eager to replace Fail links with non-Fail links:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 20 December, 2016, 01:16:58 PM
cheers tankie, traps and poisons down despite one faulty one nearly breaking my fingers...  worst case, we won't have to buy a turkey crown but there may not be enough for butties on boxing day.

we had one under the shed/dog house years ago which the wife who was very pregnabt nearly stood on as it shot out from under the back step!!! she really doesn't like them.

and my dog might be getting the sack, he's a griffon and is meant to be a ratting breed and he's missed the bugger.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 20 December, 2016, 11:03:53 PM
I'd be worried about putting down the poison with a dog in the house! But I'm sure you've thought of that.

You can use a humane trap too, but you have to make sure you take it far away as they can travel quite a way apparently.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 21 December, 2016, 09:08:07 AM
of course, the poisons no where he can get to and in sealed pouches ,if the traps get tripped without catching the rat I will consider the catch em alive route...but so far this morning nothing has been touched.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: moly on 22 December, 2016, 12:48:57 PM
Had to go to the dentist last Monday to get a tooth out as it was giving pain and didn't want to suffer over Xmas, then this week had to have another one took out have visions of having to suck on gummy bears by the age of 50 at this rate
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 22 December, 2016, 02:07:50 PM
you'll just have to overindulge on brandy claim its medicinal...


  ....rat update, confident the bugger aint in the house anymore as one trap sprung outside but no rat in it ,so I have reset it and poisoned the Nutella so even if the trap don't get it the choccy will, mwah ha haaa!!!

and yes, it is out of reach of anyone or anything other than rodents.

  and our dog has lost his two front teeth (just before xmas if you would believe it!)  hes had smelly breath for a while and the last visist to the vet he said it was his stomach and give him charcoal biccies ,, now we know it wasn't and he has a couple more loose hoping its something that can be fixed with anti biotics  as we don't have him insured.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 December, 2016, 02:36:07 PM
I feel your pain Moly - I'm about to turn 50 and my dentist has said he can no longer keep repairing the crowns that replaced all my front teeth one by one - the next step is dentures   :(

My mum asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I jokingly sang "all I want for Christmas is my two front teeth" (and you're showing your age if you remember that song!) - she replied "Okay, I'll give you some money towards your dental work", so that actually IS what she's getting me for Christmas!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 22 December, 2016, 04:00:12 PM
Well, at least it's a Toothy-related gift.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 December, 2016, 04:36:14 PM
 ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 December, 2016, 10:06:48 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 December, 2016, 04:00:12 PM
Well, at least it's a Toothy-related gift.

Biting wisdom.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 23 December, 2016, 11:12:35 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 December, 2016, 10:06:48 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 22 December, 2016, 04:00:12 PM
Well, at least it's a Toothy-related gift.

Biting wisdom.

Apropos for a Shark(y) wouldn't you say?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Goaty on 23 December, 2016, 08:08:40 PM
Nothing news from ATW, no job since New Year. 8 months without job...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 26 December, 2016, 03:46:25 PM
the poison sachet in the shed has been nicked, by the rat I imagine,which it will dine on then die then I can sleep... despite the many dreams of me stabbing the little sod I wont have to worry about floods or electrical fires. rats themselves I don't mind theyre big mice of which I had a pet one called snowy who sat on my head and bit my brother so we were very close based on that, but the damage we don't need, new year new start shit free hopefully.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Grugz on 03 January, 2017, 12:09:33 PM
a brilliant start to 2017!  starting projectile vomiting and super squits with a 38 temp! at 930pm and didn't subside til 430 am! spent the day in bed yesterday sipping water and feeling crap , a little better today.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 January, 2017, 12:20:41 PM
Well at least you know where that poison sachet went!

Horrible start to the year Grugz, get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 January, 2017, 01:32:24 PM
Sounds like a touch of Christmarse...

Get better soon, Grugzie.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 03 January, 2017, 04:28:47 PM
urgh... get well soon!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 03 January, 2017, 04:45:57 PM
Nasty stuff Grugz. Get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 January, 2017, 12:28:15 PM
I managed to nearly expire myself on Monday.

I've been having major problems with my asthma and struggling to control it. Hadn't clicked how much humidity is effecting it.

Had a major attack in the shower, stupidly had my face in the stream and choked on water.  could not breathe at all and was fading rapidly.  Had it not been for my son who did a Heimlich type thing to clear the water and get me breathing i don't think i'd be here.  scary stuff.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 13 January, 2017, 12:32:40 PM
Scary indeed, Something Fishy. Hope you are ok now. Well done to Something Fishy Junior.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 January, 2017, 02:20:38 PM
Yeah i'm good thanks surfer. The only downside is I've developed a real problem with swallowing in the days since.  i can barely eat.  I know it's in my head but it's really difficult to overcome it.

Yep, the lil'fishy was a life saver.  I need to be careful once he's (probably) gone to uni this autumn.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 January, 2017, 04:09:13 PM
Wow. Scary. Glad to hear it worked out so well for you Fishy. You may have to increase the lad's pocket money.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 13 January, 2017, 05:26:56 PM
Also maybe get a check up if you haven't had one for a while.

I have a friend with asthma, who had a recent check up. Thankfully it went okay, although they said she was a bit wheezy, something that hadn't particularly bothered her. They also gave her a pump and told her she should be using it each day, something that she hadn't been doing. A small thing, but point is, they picked up on something she should be doing for prevention.

I think her asthma is comparatively mild. For someone who has had pretty severe attacks, I'd say that's even more reason to get an MOT.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 13 January, 2017, 05:30:56 PM
A friend's sister has just died last night of the dreaded C-word, deeply troubling times!!!  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 13 January, 2017, 06:04:57 PM
Sorry to hear that, Batman's Superior Cousin.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 January, 2017, 09:00:05 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 13 January, 2017, 05:26:56 PM
Also maybe get a check up if you haven't had one for a while.

I have a friend with asthma, who had a recent check up. Thankfully it went okay, although they said she was a bit wheezy, something that hadn't particularly bothered her. They also gave her a pump and told her she should be using it each day, something that she hadn't been doing. A small thing, but point is, they picked up on something she should be doing for prevention.

I think her asthma is comparatively mild. For someone who has had pretty severe attacks, I'd say that's even more reason to get an MOT.

yeah thanks.  Indeed.  it has put my sis in itu twice in the last few years.  It kills people and I admit I was taking it too lightly.

I was having major problems in the autumn and lots of attacks so went along to a clinic.  my peak flow was down at 33%.  really dangerous.

so I have since been trying various meds and inhalers to sort it but we've struggled to stablise it.  I have a white cell issue which causes inflammation which is not helping so it's a struggle.

this one was a wake up that I need to be way more careful though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 January, 2017, 09:00:35 PM
very sorry to hear your news BSC.  Very sad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 January, 2017, 09:03:08 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 13 January, 2017, 04:09:13 PM
Wow. Scary. Glad to hear it worked out so well for you Fishy. You may have to increase the lad's pocket money.

haha not sure about that boom.  he gets his entire child benefit to spend on what he needs as it is (until it ends with his a levels in june that is).  i did help sort out 8 weeks work over the summer for him though so that'll do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 13 January, 2017, 09:58:17 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 13 January, 2017, 05:26:56 PM
Also maybe get a check up if you haven't had one for a while.

I've had asthma for decades - never had a scary near-death attack though. I've not done it any favouirs with years of smoking, but it's easily manageable with inhalers.

I've been with the same GP practice for 26 years and have always received an annual letter inviting me for an asthma review. Great service to offer, and I used to take it up every 4-5 years just to keep an eye on things, but I've been managing my asthma so long I didn't feel the need to go every year. Nowadays, I can't refill my prescription unless I go. Waste of resources
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 13 January, 2017, 11:13:03 PM
I was like that for years dant.  it just suddenly went bad and this week was a horror I've never had before.  i'll be watching it much more closely now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 03:23:03 PM
It feels a bit like anyone I know who has asthma is getting worse at the moment and I wondered if it was caused by increasing pollution levels. It's ridiculously bad in London now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 04:26:52 PM
Also in case you don't go on the 'Life is okay' thread. I have just heard I have a rental flat to move into soon! It's been 3 months of increasingly desperate searching but I just have to organise moving now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 20 January, 2017, 04:36:35 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 03:23:03 PM
It feels a bit like anyone I know who has asthma is getting worse at the moment and I wondered if it was caused by increasing pollution levels. It's ridiculously bad in London now.

Yes, I was sent a tweet a short while ago stating that the air in Central London is at toxic levels!

Makes me wonder if Central London workers should use those little face mask things that cover nose and mouth, like many people over in China have taken to doing. (Mind you, I have my doubts they would do much good.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 04:39:52 PM
I know a government librarian who has taken to wearing those masks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 20 January, 2017, 05:31:56 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 03:23:03 PM
It feels a bit like anyone I know who has asthma is getting worse at the moment and I wondered if it was caused by increasing pollution levels. It's ridiculously bad in London now.

Mine felt much better in Iceland I have to say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 20 January, 2017, 05:32:28 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 04:26:52 PM
Also in case you don't go on the 'Life is okay' thread. I have just heard I have a rental flat to move into soon! It's been 3 months of increasingly desperate searching but I just have to organise moving now.

Good news. Congrats.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 January, 2017, 06:25:49 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 04:26:52 PM
Also in case you don't go on the 'Life is okay' thread. I have just heard I have a rental flat to move into soon! It's been 3 months of increasingly desperate searching but I just have to organise moving now.

Hurrah, well done SG!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 25 January, 2017, 11:01:52 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 03:23:03 PM
It feels a bit like anyone I know who has asthma is getting worse at the moment and I wondered if it was caused by increasing pollution levels. It's ridiculously bad in London now.
Last year pollution levels in London broke annual legal limits by the eleventh day of January.  That is, in eleven days the limits for the entire year were broken.  This year it only took 'til the fifth.  And the current transport minister wants to remove congestion charging even though approximately 10,000 people are killed in the city by pollution each year.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 25 January, 2017, 11:03:51 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 25 January, 2017, 11:01:52 AM
Quote from: staticgirl on 20 January, 2017, 03:23:03 PM
It feels a bit like anyone I know who has asthma is getting worse at the moment and I wondered if it was caused by increasing pollution levels. It's ridiculously bad in London now.
Last year pollution levels in London broke annual legal limits by the eleventh day of January.  That is, in eleven days the limits for the entire year were broken.  This year it only took 'til the fifth.  And the current transport minister wants to remove congestion charging even though approximately 10,000 people are killed in the city by pollution each year.

p.s. I've been sent a pollution alert whenever levels are expected to be moderate or worse.  I used to get a few every year (certainly no more than one a month). (just checking) I've had eight this month so far.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 27 January, 2017, 09:33:05 AM
We all need to win the lottery so we can get away from the SE....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 28 January, 2017, 05:42:26 PM
I have the flu. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 31 January, 2017, 11:23:50 AM
Keep warm and get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 31 January, 2017, 04:41:10 PM
Thank you.Im feeling a bit better today. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 31 January, 2017, 04:48:09 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/cyKjK2r.gif)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 31 January, 2017, 05:14:44 PM
I got a call last Thursday from an agency offering me work this Monday (yesterday) at a nearby town I asked when the role ended and the esponse was "no end date".

Now I'm aware that is a bit ambiguous, but I think most of us would interpret that to mean that work is probably long term right? Especially as when I enquired about wages, they gave me a rather low figure but  they could reassess me in 13 weeks time.

I didn't mind too much. I would prefer job security to high wages.

So I went in yesterday. Pleasant company setting. Staff were quite pleasant. The job was easy. Rather repetitive, and I can imagine it getting a bit boring, but for the low wages, that's okay .

I finished it all rather quickly.

At the end of the day myanager approached me.
"How are you doing?"
"Fine I finished it all."
"Good. What did [the agency] say about your hours?"

"They told me I would be working from 9:00 to 5:30."

"Great. We won't need you tomorrow. We just needed you to put those through."

Wonderful.So I spent £20 for a weekly bus ticket I don't need. Thank God I didn't fork out for a monthly ticket.

Thankfully I have an interview for other work tomorrow. I came very close to cancelling it yesterday after starting the other job, but something told me to wait to see how that first day went. I'm so glad I listened to that small voice, although I have my doubts I'll get the job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 31 January, 2017, 05:28:11 PM
Sorry Smith. I hope you feel much better soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 31 January, 2017, 05:53:15 PM
Thank you all. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 01 February, 2017, 11:32:26 AM
Mardroid I really hope you get that other job. I wish people were treated with more respect - you're a person not an economic unit to be deployed however they wish with no thought about how it affects you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2017, 12:18:49 PM
Yup - what Staticgirl said.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 February, 2017, 01:27:44 PM
Yeah Mardroid, you deserve far better: employers can be outrageous gits.  I can't even remember how many times I was in your shoes - looking hungrily at a few weeks' work vaguely and loosely sketched out as bait in a phone call, only to be back on the bus by 5 the first day.  I've been self-employed for a long stretch now, but for my current project (which is actually okay) with one of my main clients I switched to a PAYE month-long contract since it was completely monopolising my time - I now have their HR badgering me to sign that contract (despite its term having expired over a week ago) because they 'need to have their paperwork in order'.  I pointed out that there surely can't any real hurry, since they haven't actually renewed my contract and I'm only in work this past week out of pure good faith on my part, but that apparently isn't a pressing concern.  It is for me!  Quid pro quo, folks. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 01 February, 2017, 05:04:00 PM
Thanks everyone. This particular agency has provided me with decent work in the past though, which makes me wonder if they misunderstood what the client was after. They did not reply to my email, so I doubt they will refund my pass. They pay a week in arrears though, so I'll see when the wages come through.

Concerning today's interview...

I got up early and went to the venue (which happened to actually be the local jobcentre in this case). While waiting outside, the thought occurred... is this the right date? I couldn't remember it being the 1st of Feb. I checked my email and it's actually next week.  :lol: I'm not sure what happened there. I had it marked on Google calendar on the correct date, and somehow still  got the two weeks mixed up. Maybe the supposed other work from Monday was a factor in my confusion, there.

Silly, silly me. Thankfully I didn't travel far, and I was planning on going into town anyway so the bus-pass doesn't got to waste. I'm just so glad I checked the date before I actually went into the building.

That quite tickled me actually. Life hits you with a stick one day, then comes up behind you and tickles your ribs the next.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 03 February, 2017, 10:36:23 AM
Student Finances being a pain in the arse. I had to bale kn a course a year ago for medical reasons, but the OU said I could reclaim 90% of that loans costs to start a fresh one this year. I paid the remaining 10%, the lads at the OU said they would deal with the rest. Flash forward three months to this week and i'm getting phone calls telling me I need to pay off the remaining 90% (£2000 up front). Im asking the OU legal and finance team to look into this as well as the Student Finances because fuck off! I was informed this was all well within the bounds of what I was informed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 03 February, 2017, 11:19:58 AM
Update: Well that was quick! Good job to the guys at the OU for finding it was infact THEM at fault for incorrectly recirding the academic year I initially clained the loan. Silly sods!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 03 February, 2017, 11:36:20 AM
Less than an hour for a bureaucracy to find their error. You must live under a lucky star Hawk. Great news.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 03 February, 2017, 12:47:00 PM
In their defence, I was quite arsey with the poor lass in the phone. :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 03 February, 2017, 06:18:21 PM
Meanwhile my new letting agent, my old letting agent and the removal van firm all want me to be in 3 different places at the same time on Tuesday when I move. Ffs. I don't even drive so it will take me an hour or two to go from one to the other.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 04 February, 2017, 01:56:04 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 03 February, 2017, 06:18:21 PM
Meanwhile my new letting agent, my old letting agent and the removal van firm all want me to be in 3 different places at the same time on Tuesday when I move. Ffs. I don't even drive so it will take me an hour or two to go from one to the other.

Odd that the old letting agent want you to be somewhere.  I remember the last time I moved I had to work out how to get to the new letting agent to sign the contract and move to the new place in the same morning, which involved my first trip outside in a vehicle other than in an ambulance in five months, so I'm glad I didn't have to visit the old agent as well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 04 February, 2017, 02:02:41 PM
The last time I signed up to a temp agency I was paid £9 an hour to deliver leaflets to businesses on Bond Street.  I managed to do that in about an hour and ended up having spent more on travelling in to Central London to do this than I was actually paid.  It did lead to two more jobs, one of which went permanent and I'm still in, ten years later (well, sort of - I'm in my third position in the same office I started as a temp in in 2007).

p.s. my dad was once sent one of those 'thanks for your application, but we cannot offer you a position at this time, but your details will be kept on file' letters.  Six months later they got back in touch with him and offered him a job.  It ended up being the last job he had, and where he met his second wife.  I hasten to add it was his last job because he is now retired!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 04 February, 2017, 02:05:35 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 04 February, 2017, 01:56:04 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 03 February, 2017, 06:18:21 PM
Meanwhile my new letting agent, my old letting agent and the removal van firm all want me to be in 3 different places at the same time on Tuesday when I move. Ffs. I don't even drive so it will take me an hour or two to go from one to the other.

Odd that the old letting agent want you to be somewhere.  I remember the last time I moved I had to work out how to get to the new letting agent to sign the contract and move to the new place in the same morning, which involved my first trip outside in a vehicle other than in an ambulance in five months, so I'm glad I didn't have to visit the old agent as well!

I really can't remember how I actually managed it now - I remember having to sign the contract around the corner from the letting agent as a) the letting agent had a wheelchair-unfriendly step and b) the pavement outside sloped sharply down to the road.  But the day I moved I didn't have access to a wheelchair and had to be on crutches, so we either had the keys before I managed to get a replacement wheelchair or I somehow had a day trip to the letting agent while I was still in the nursing home, neither of which circumstances I can imagine or remember doing...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 05 February, 2017, 12:31:16 PM
Blimey that sounds difficult!

Yeah the old letting agent (my old flat is owned by a multi-national lettings company rather than a person) want me to attend a 'checking out appointment' which 'won't take more than 45 minutes' apparently. I have managed to get them to push that to the end of the day and I have got the current letting agent to look into whether she can meet me at the property. If not, I guess I'll manage somehow even if it means blister plasters or spending a fortune on taxis.

Sheridan, you have inspired me because if you can do it I can!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 07 February, 2017, 09:38:25 PM
Quote from: staticgirl on 05 February, 2017, 12:31:16 PM
Blimey that sounds difficult!

Yeah the old letting agent (my old flat is owned by a multi-national lettings company rather than a person) want me to attend a 'checking out appointment' which 'won't take more than 45 minutes' apparently. I have managed to get them to push that to the end of the day and I have got the current letting agent to look into whether she can meet me at the property. If not, I guess I'll manage somehow even if it means blister plasters or spending a fortune on taxis.

Sheridan, you have inspired me because if you can do it I can!

How far are you moving?  The nursing home I was moving from was in Seven Sisters, my old flat (which I didn't visit the day I moved out of it) was in Muswell Hill, the letting agent halfway between Archway and Crouch End and the place I now live is between Camden and Holloway Road - so all sort-of in the same area.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 08 February, 2017, 06:18:49 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 04 February, 2017, 02:02:41 PM
my dad was once sent one of those 'thanks for your application, but we cannot offer you a position at this time, but your details will be kept on file' letters.  Six months later they got back in touch with him and offered him a job.

Two days ago I hired someone I'd kept on file since October. I do this regularly. Today's market means every job posting gets a lot of applications, so it's time-consuming to work through them and I try not to post externally too often. It helps me to refer to people I've shortlisted before, and bring them in for a fresh interview.

Short version: it doesn't hurt to hope.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 08 February, 2017, 06:38:47 PM
Apologies for the double post, but I have a few more thoughts on this subject. I see regular chat on here about job hunting and, in the spirit of Squaxx helping Squaxx, here are a few tips from me. (I do a lot of hiring these days.)

1. Write a cover letter.
You would not believe how many people just click on the online applications thing and attach a CV. Writing a letter gets you further, and sometimes a hiring manager will see so many applications that they just delete anyone who hasn't bothered to add a letter, because it's a sign that they're applying for everything in sight with no interest in any one job.

2. Make your application relevant.
Tailor that CV so it matches the job description. Take out the irrelevant stuff, like that student job you had. It's fine to give a framework of your job history, to show you have a work ethic and no puzzling gaps, but most employers will be skimming the CV looking for certain things, so making relevant parts easier to find is going to help you stand out. Also, extra points for a cover letter that shows you know something about the place that's hiring.

3. Be polite.
Managers are human, too. If you're rude, they don't want to hire you. Just be as nice as you can, and be understanding of delays in the process. It's OK to be a little pushy but there is a line. Repeated inquiries risk closing the door, but a polite email asking how it's going is usually acceptable. This is important: if you get an email from an individual saying you haven't got the job, always, always, always reply to it. Send a note thanking them and saying that, while you're disappointed, you wish them well. Then, if you only just missed out this time, they'll remember you and maybe hire you in future.

4. Tell the truth.
After surprisingly few applications, you begin to smell the bullshit. Don't say it's your dream job unless it really is. Don't overpromise, because it's totally fine to say you haven't done exactly the same thing but have done a similar thing and anyway you're adaptable and a quick study. That's a good answer to give. Overall, try to be accurate but positive. It's refreshing to get a candidate like this.

Anyway, I'll shut up now. Good luck to the job hunters out there!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 09 February, 2017, 12:18:52 PM
Good tips. We hire through getting applicants to initially fill out competency based forms before selection for interview. It is amazing how many people just attach a CV and write 'see CV' in every box. They are first to go in the bin. I have always suspected those people of just applying to keep their benefits adviser happy. I hope it is that and they are not completely misguided.

I am in my new flat! The day went off without a hitch once I had got all the people to meet me at the times I could be met. I am not in love with the flat - no tellybox, freeview etc and the heating is a bit tricky - but I have a roof over my head and loads of people helping me with my issues (my cousin-in-law is a very useful gas engineer).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 09 February, 2017, 02:13:23 PM
Wonderful news about the new flat SG!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 09 February, 2017, 04:38:26 PM
Yes, good news StaticGirl and thanks for the tips Trout. All good points.

I had an interview yesterday as it happens. (The one I turned up for a week early, that I waffled about earlier. I might have gone home and had a few meals and showers since then.) I'm not convinced it went that well  - it was a competency based interview with "Can you give us an example when..." instructions, and I'm not very good at them, even when I prepare properly* - but we'll see. I didn't outright lie, but I think I bent the truth a bit in cases, divulged too much information in other cases and probably not enough in others. Often, I couldn't think of a good answer. It could have been a lot worse though.

It's simple enough work in a warehouse, so I'm sure I can do the job, (I've even done warehouse work previously for an agency without an interview!) but at they're interviewing a lot of people, I guess they'll fall back on these interviews when making their selection.

Concerning the one day job - I recently had a bit more of an issue with that with the agency asking me for my timesheet. (As I only went in, one day, I never got my manager there to sign it. They informed me that was okay, they would send the required information to the agency... which they delayed doing.)  Yesterday it got resolved when the agency finally got the timesheet from the company.

The payroll folks at the agency informed me that the company had given them incorrect hours (6 1/2 instead of 71/2) in a previous email, so I'll be paid less this week, but the latest timesheet sent has the correct hours. So one hours pay next week then. Heh.

I'm not too fussed by that as at least it's coming. I had a nice surprise too - according to the payslip I'm getting 50 pence an hour more than I was originally quoted. It doesn't pay me back the amount I spent on a weekly ticket, but it's nice, just the same.

*And I probably didn't to be honest. I was still feeling a bit cross and pessimistic after last week's job issue, and instead of spurring me on to try harder I find myself thinking... why bother, I'll fail anyway. Not the right attitude, I know. I'll snap out of it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: staticgirl on 21 February, 2017, 03:28:54 PM
You'd be forgiven for feeling a bit down after that palaver.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 April, 2017, 07:37:46 AM
Ow! My knee hurts. And it's keeping me from running which rapidly became my new addiction.

It is this new addiction causing the knee to hurt and I am fixing this with the help of a Physio but I overdid it yesterday in the garden. So, Ow! again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 April, 2017, 09:59:41 AM
Ouch, gotta be careful with knees, they're complex and painful buggers.

I'm fed up because I've been wearing my new dentures for a week and a bit and they're horrible. I look better, but eating with a big lump of plastic in my mouth is just horrible, and my palate is constantly dry. Dentist says I'll get used to it "in a few weeks" but I can't see it happening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 April, 2017, 01:11:39 PM
Ouch and eww.

I've had no work for just over two months now and am coming to the ragged end of my savings. It was a similar story last year but not nearly as bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 03 April, 2017, 03:15:05 PM
Good luck chaps, all three of you make my grumpy for no reason... well, unreasonable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 April, 2017, 03:48:17 PM
Thanks, Huffy. You may be grumpy but at least you're a grumpy prince.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 03 April, 2017, 06:12:28 PM
I prefer elder statesman  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Cyberleader2000 on 20 April, 2017, 06:34:00 AM
I hate being up this early normally I wake now then go back to sleep but I just saw the most massive spider in my room now I love spiders their amazing creatures but I don't like them in my room so I had to go catch it but the fucker ran behind the border took me 15 minutes to get it to run back out so I could catch it so now I'm fully awake and I have no clue what to do for the next 3 hours.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Supreme Pizza Of The DPRK on 20 April, 2017, 07:24:36 AM
Quote from: Cyberleader2000 on 20 April, 2017, 06:34:00 AM
I hate being up this early normally I wake now then go back to sleep but I just saw the most massive spider in my room

Speaking of spiders, whatever happened to spiders in the bath? Used to get them all the time when I was a kid. I haven't seen a spider in the bath since the 90's.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 April, 2017, 09:05:36 AM
They've learned how to use wet-wipes instead...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 20 April, 2017, 10:42:09 AM
+1  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 20 April, 2017, 02:10:06 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 April, 2017, 09:05:36 AM
They've learned how to use wet-wipes instead...
'Drum Snare'
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 April, 2017, 03:19:13 PM
I'm here all week, folks!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 April, 2017, 05:19:33 PM
Flight from Jersey to Manchester has been delayed by an hour. Bollocks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 28 April, 2017, 06:18:07 PM
A $12,000-a-ticket private music festival in the Bahamas has turned into a Lord Of The Flies-style dystopian nightmare (http://themuse.jezebel.com/fema-tents-government-cheese-and-feral-dogs-ja-rule-1794742843) and like most people on social media, I can't stop laughing.  I have a bad cold so I end up wheezing and coughing, but it's totally worth it.
I'll feel bad if someone dies, but until then if you paid 12k to watch Blink 182, seriously, fuck you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 28 April, 2017, 06:38:53 PM
Been following the proceedings with morbid curiosity all day. Rich kids in too deep is hilarious reality disaster entertainment.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 28 April, 2017, 06:44:50 PM
Oh no,they had to eat cheese sandwitches!The horror!THE HORROR!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 28 April, 2017, 07:18:40 PM
Should've bought a ticket for the butler too. Wankers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 02 May, 2017, 10:49:48 AM
On the one hand it isn't nice to laugh at other's misfortunes, and it's not cool for anyone to be locked into an airport waiting room against their will no matter the size of their wallet. On the other hand these people will all fall backwards into comfort and spent half a year's wage on a badly-planned holiday in the Bahamas with some utterly dire music acts.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 03 May, 2017, 11:12:56 PM
I started a five week contract last Thursday.

This morning I got a call from the agency informing me that "while I fitted in well, they were doing a staff reshuffle and as of today, I was no longer required." So three days then. Hmm.

I'm not entirely surprised as I'm quite a slow worker, so I guess if they're going to let someone go, it would be me, but after just three days?

Never mind, I needed a rest. (Warehouse work. On my feet for a good part of 8 hours, etc, and I've been feeling the aches and pains a bit today.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 May, 2017, 06:14:12 AM
I sympathise, Mardy. I'm 50 years old and just started work as a gardener-cum-odd-jobber after years of a driving a truck and my body feels like somebody threw it down a mountain. Twice.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 10 May, 2017, 03:42:32 PM
Driving home from a weekly shop at Aldi earlier, it's a relatively hot day, so we have the windows open.
Oh look, what's that massive cloud on the road ahead?
Oh my god, BEES!
Ten seconds later, the car was full of bees, I had a bee-covered face and my wife nearly swerved off the road.

Thankfully, didn't get stung. Double thankfully, as my mum is hugely allergic to bee stings and suffers anaphylaxis if stung- and I've never been stung, so I have no idea if I am too.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 10 May, 2017, 09:52:30 PM
Yikes! Glad you're all okay SBT. Thankfully bees in this country are not particularly aggressive, but in that situation they could have figured they were under attack...

I don't think I've ever been stung either. Not even by a wasp. I reckon they get a bad rep. Red ants on the other hand...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 11 May, 2017, 10:30:18 AM
How does this happen? I've been stung at least 10 times. Three of which were memorable as a kid, the rest less important as an adult who has learned that life is pain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 11 May, 2017, 01:11:33 PM
I've been told that you can't have an allergic reaction the first time you're stung, only on subsequent stings.

I have no idea if this is true (I've also never been stung).

Edit:

Apparently it is true: https://www.anaphylaxis.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Insect-stings-v10-formatted-new-logo-and-reference-corrected.pdf
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 11 May, 2017, 02:01:16 PM
That gives me... I don't know what, actually. On the one hand, if I get stung and don't die, hurray! On the other hand I still have the fear that next time I will die.
I am somehow MORE scared now.
The thing is, I love bees. As a kid, I used to sit in the garden and have them land on me. I've even stroked a few.
I can't stand the confusion in my mind!
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Supreme Pizza Of The DPRK on 11 May, 2017, 02:33:17 PM
Just dress like a bee. I'm pretty sure there isn't much in-fighting as far as bees are concerned. So blend in, make them think you are a bee and you will have nothing to worry about.


I'd just like to add this is based on nothing but assumption.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 11 May, 2017, 05:17:09 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 11 May, 2017, 02:01:16 PM
That gives me... I don't know what, actually. On the one hand, if I get stung and don't die, hurray! On the other hand I still have the fear that next time I will die.
I am somehow MORE scared now.
The thing is, I love bees. As a kid, I used to sit in the garden and have them land on me. I've even stroked a few.
I can't stand the confusion in my mind!
SBT

To make things even more nerve-racking, you could be a beekeeper (say) for thirty years, get stung numerous times over that period then suddenly and without warning become allergic to bee stings and have a severe reaction
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 May, 2017, 12:34:08 PM
I was just having a lunchtime forty winks when a robin flew into my cabin, crapped on my Mega Collection then flew out again. Little swine.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 18 May, 2017, 12:42:45 PM
Break out the crowbar Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 May, 2017, 12:55:04 PM
I'll be having words with that bloody Batman...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 19 May, 2017, 09:57:44 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 18 May, 2017, 12:34:08 PM
I was just having a lunchtime forty winks when a robin flew into my cabin, crapped on my Mega Collection then flew out again. Little swine.

Bad news.  Which volume was it?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tony Angelino on 19 May, 2017, 10:16:06 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 19 May, 2017, 09:57:44 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 18 May, 2017, 12:34:08 PM
I was just having a lunchtime forty winks when a robin flew into my cabin, crapped on my Mega Collection then flew out again. Little swine.

Bad news.  Which volume was it?

If there is any justice it will be the one with Sleeze N Ryder in it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Supreme Pizza Of The DPRK on 20 May, 2017, 06:17:47 AM
My flatmate is sick, which means sooner or later I'm getting it too. So I'm making the most of what time I have left by stocking up the kitchen with junk food, orange juice (proper stuff) and pills/tablets/etc.

Good thing is that I got Alan Moore's Jerusalem out of the library so that will keep me busy. On the downside I'm a student so no one else is going to do my work for me while I'm sick.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 May, 2017, 06:27:35 AM
Volume 80 (Dark Side of the Moon).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Supreme Pizza Of The DPRK on 06 June, 2017, 04:46:27 AM
I run a Facebook page for a friend of mine. Went to log in today and "due to suspicious activity" they want me to type in a code sent to a cellphone number that I no longer have.

And there is no other way to log in. Reset your account. We have sent a code to your phone. Which you no longer have.

Want to talk to a real person from Facebook? Good luck. This is why I don't have a personal Facebook page. S**t eating w***stains they are.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: hippynumber1 on 10 June, 2017, 11:40:18 AM
Second round of redundancies in two years at the college where I work and they want to lose another two and a half posts from my department. We bought a house eight weeks (or so) ago. It looks like they're working on cutting A Levels completely - Geography, Economics, Religious Studies, History are being cut as is either English Language or English Lang/Lit combined. They are offering a volutary severance package but I don't know if I should go for it and risk losing the house if I can't get a new job or brave it out and risk losing the house and a payout if I get made redundant.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 10 June, 2017, 12:39:08 PM
That is a dilemma hippy. Whatever happens, I hope it turns out for the best for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Supreme Pizza Of The DPRK on 10 June, 2017, 03:52:47 PM
Some local punk kids have a drone and have been trespassing on my airspace. We will see how this modern technology fares against my low tech solution of a hunting slingshot, shotgun style.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 10 June, 2017, 09:09:52 PM
Quote from: Supreme Pizza Of The DPRK on 10 June, 2017, 03:52:47 PM
Some local punk kids have a drone and have been trespassing on my airspace. We will see how this modern technology fares against my low tech solution of a hunting slingshot, shotgun style.

XKCD, just the other day:
(https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/drone_problems.png) (https://xkcd.com/1846/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 12 June, 2017, 07:16:00 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing on 10 August, 2009, 03:31:54 PM
I've eaten something that has slightly upset my stomach, giving me tremendously bad wind. And tonight is "date night". Married squaxx will understand my mild annoyance.

Steev

Trick is to blame the dog.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 12 June, 2017, 07:17:49 PM
Sorry, somehow clicked on page 1 of the thread and thought it was the most recent post.  Never been good at reading dates. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 12 June, 2017, 07:21:44 PM
If that date went well,by now their kid should be starting school. :p
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 13 June, 2017, 10:19:14 AM
Quote from: hippynumber1 on 10 June, 2017, 11:40:18 AM
They are offering a volutary severance package but I don't know if I should go for it and risk losing the house if I can't get a new job or brave it out and risk losing the house and a payout if I get made redundant.

Shite situation, Hip.
Hope it works out for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 13 June, 2017, 11:41:02 AM
Cripes, hippy, I missed that one completely: awful situation to be in. No chance you have mortgage protection to soften the gamble? Obviously dont know the specifics of your industry, but my but own feeling is always to hang on and try to find another job while still in employment, rather than jump first and rely on a cash float. My own career and finances are a carcrash, and I often feel it's this tendency to delay my exit that has been a big part of the problem, so heed your own counsel! You do have my sympathy, though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 13 June, 2017, 05:47:47 PM
Surely you'd still get the pay out if your job was made redundant? Plus mortgage payment protection insurance normally kicks in (assuming you have it). I'm not sure if that's the case If you volunteer for redundancy. So check these things out as part of your decision making.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 17 June, 2017, 10:41:56 AM
I got into an argument with my sister over something stupid,we both said things we didnt mean.And now I feel terrible about it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 June, 2017, 12:09:04 PM
We've all been there. The sooner you apologise (whether it's your fault or not), the sooner it'll be behind you. My advice, for what it's worth, is to not let the situation fester - buy her a bit of her favourite thing and make peace.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 17 June, 2017, 06:10:29 PM
Shark speaks the truth. Apologise soon and regardless, small token never hurts. You're stuck with your siblings to the end, may as well make the journey as pleasant as possible.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 17 June, 2017, 06:35:01 PM
I apologized.We are patching thing up. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 17 June, 2017, 10:05:08 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 12 June, 2017, 07:17:49 PM
Sorry, somehow clicked on page 1 of the thread and thought it was the most recent post.  Never been good at reading dates. 
Just when Steev was living it down, as well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 17 June, 2017, 10:09:46 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 17 June, 2017, 10:05:08 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 12 June, 2017, 07:17:49 PM
Sorry, somehow clicked on page 1 of the thread and thought it was the most recent post.  Never been good at reading dates. 
Just when Steev was living it down, as well!

Could've been worse. Could've been bumslug.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 20 June, 2017, 02:17:23 PM
Went to my car this morning only to find it had been swiped down the driver's side. No information, no note, no class.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 13 July, 2017, 02:08:19 PM
The freelancer zero hour contract type existence! >:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 July, 2017, 05:47:16 PM
Twanged a muscle in the back of my leg - walking like an octogenarian looking for his Zimmer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 14 October, 2017, 02:01:02 PM
My tablet went nuts.With the freezing and menus randomly opening up...It really cuts down my comic reading.Dammit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 14 October, 2017, 04:34:16 PM
Is it an iPad mini?  There's a weird glitch with the screen on some of them which means it basically goes ballistic.  Best way to describe it is like it has been taken over by a poltergeist!  I think it's something to do with the digitiser.  Pain in the neck.  Especially if the warranty has just expired!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Modern Panther on 14 October, 2017, 04:49:03 PM
Was supposed to be moving house yesterday, but thanks to a solicitor hiding problems and only revealing them at the last minute, I am now without a house until at least Monday.  If not for family and the kindness of people I barely know, I'd be sleeping in my car.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 October, 2017, 05:31:11 PM
I feel ya, Panth. Hope you get it sorted soon.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 14 October, 2017, 06:56:42 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 14 October, 2017, 04:34:16 PM
Is it an iPad mini?  There's a weird glitch with the screen on some of them which means it basically goes ballistic.  Best way to describe it is like it has been taken over by a poltergeist!  I think it's something to do with the digitiser.  Pain in the neck.  Especially if the warranty has just expired!
Like randomly zooming in and out and opening the slide-down menu?Thats my problem. :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 15 October, 2017, 11:28:39 AM
Sounds like the digitiser then.  Sorry.  I would suggest cheese but the last time someone did in these parts as a cure for an apple product things got a bit ugly!

It turned out cheaper to replace the damn thing than get it fixed.  Not news you want to hear, I'm sure.
:'(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 15 October, 2017, 06:26:24 PM
It seems to be mostly back to normal now.I hope.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 16 October, 2017, 05:02:10 PM
My car was parked in front of my home yesterday and one of my neighbours smashed into it. It may be a right-off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 October, 2017, 05:17:59 PM
Jeez, VB, that sucks. Hope your neighbour's okay, though.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 16 October, 2017, 06:03:36 PM
It's a first World problem but it's getting right on my tits at the moment.
I work from home as a writer (a poor one, it has to be said), and a homemaker.
The only time I get out of the house is to see Spurs matches.
The first home match of the season I missed because I was on holiday in Benidorm, the next I missed because of the chest infection I picked up on that holiday. The third match I missed at home was because the Wife had booked a short cruise with her sister who is visiting from New Zealand so I stayed at home to look after our Son and the fourth I missed because my Mum was going to look after my Son and my Wife and Sister in Law were going to the match too but my Father was taken into hospital with pneumonia.
So since May I have not seen my team play and it's my release from everything else but considering the illness of my Dad and the fact that my Wife is spending time with her Sister from 12,000 miles away it's small one but, and it's a small but (or so I'm told...It hardly sticks out at all) man, I miss my friends and my team.
I get to watch the matches on TV but it's not the same.
Hopefully all this will change on Sunday when we take on Liverpool.

Nothing compared to other people's problems, I appreciate that, but Spurs have been such a big part of my life since 1978, and I have hardly missed a home match since, that it's starting to get me down a bit.
Fingers crossed that I get to the match on Sunday.

And that sucks about your car VB. Some people are utter pricks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 16 October, 2017, 07:06:50 PM
Thanks guys. Everyone was fine. No injuries. Just the car, which the insurance will take care of. Just a hassle that's all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 16 October, 2017, 08:33:52 PM
Pain in the arse, VB. Always such an unnecessary hassle.

And Matt, I totally get your frustration.  My only real non-work non-family non-virtual social activity is sailing/racing dinghies, but the mate I'd been sailing with for a decade emigrated, and seemingly endless random evening/night and weekend work over the past three years meant I found it very hard to get back out.  However, over the past month I've finally managed to get back on the water with a few different boats, and it's been just great.  A real lift to my mood.

Hobbies are important: getting out of the house, the thrill of competition, the fun of sharing essentially pointless interests with others.  It's a big part of life that shouldn't be neglected.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Banners on 23 October, 2017, 01:46:47 PM
So as well as being a 2000 AD geek and sci-fi nerd, I am a big anorak for the ITV programme London's Burning, which has recently been revived on the Drama Channel.

Recently, another fan I know through Twitter discovered some previously unseen behind the scenes pics within the Rex/Shutterstock photo library. Rather than have to look at tiny thumbnails with watermarks, I suggested I would design and print around 30-50 copies of a 20 page A5 photo book so we could enjoy the images properly. This would of course be non-profit and all trademarks and credits would be acknowledged. Rex/Shutterstock offered the pics at a fair price but this was contingent on getting clearance from ITV.

ITV have now asked for at least £20,000 in advance before they will enter into negotiations to potentially allow the project to go ahead. When I suggested that was too much and that I might just do it anyway, I was advised that to do so would be at my own risk, and to take legal advice.

It's nuts. Of course I want to do things properly in terms of rights and things, but this was just supposed to be a fun little not-for-profit project amongst a very small group of nerds, who like looking at pictures of people from the 1990s dressed up as firefighters.

~sigh~
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 23 October, 2017, 02:36:30 PM
Greedy dastards. It's like there's a war on fun in this country.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eric Plumrose on 23 October, 2017, 08:10:12 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 16 October, 2017, 06:03:36 PM
I get to watch the matches on TV but it's not the same.

Sorry to take this off on a tangent but no Spurs fan I've asked has ever been able to answer. What's with "Live! From White Hart Lane!" when the Spurs ground isn't actually on White Hart Lane?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 24 October, 2017, 08:01:52 AM
Quote from: Eric Plumrose on 23 October, 2017, 08:10:12 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 16 October, 2017, 06:03:36 PM
I get to watch the matches on TV but it's not the same.

Sorry to take this off on a tangent but no Spurs fan I've asked has ever been able to answer. What's with "Live! From White Hart Lane!" when the Spurs ground isn't actually on White Hart Lane?

Whilst it's not actually on White Hart Lane it's the name that was adopted by the brewery that owned the plot of land that used to be a nursery. Often directions to farmers in the late 1800's was White Hart Lane as there was nothing around the area at the time and the nursery, and then obviously the stadium that was built there, was clearly visible as it's only a couple of hundred yards away. It's actually on the High Road but in those days there wasn't a High road to mention of. The name stuck as the years went by and will when the new stadium is finished despite what it maybe called. The new stadium will actually be a 100 yards closer to White Hart Lane than the old one was.

I finally got to go to a game on Sunday and what a game it was. A triumphant return! Dad still in hospital but hopefully coming out today or tomorrow.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 24 October, 2017, 07:07:39 PM
On my work printer, if you send it a print job with an odd number of pages, it only prints the last one.  If you send it an even number of pages, it prints them all.  So, in order to print a 3-page document, you have to send two print jobs: one for pages 1-2 and one for page 3.

I could update the drivers, or get IT to update the drivers.  However, then I would not have a minor impediment to report.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 26 October, 2017, 06:06:22 PM
I found out recently that we'll be doing mandatory overtime starting next week.

On one hand, I'm happy as we get the time and a half pay, and I don't mind the extra day. I'm not keen on the fact they're adding an extra hour to each shift as well though (so 5 11 hours shifts rather than the usual 4 day 10 hours. ).

I have quite a bit of traveling, and I come in extra early too, as a certain bus is not reliable. I don't get enough sleep as it is... and it looks like things could get worse.

A small complaint really though. I'm now on my fifth week of permanent full time work with decent pay after months of temping/unemployment so I've a lot to be thankful for. I think I should seriously consider moving closer though, but not sure I should risk that until I've passed my probationary period (assuming that I do).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 26 October, 2017, 06:45:34 PM
I got stung by a hornet.My arm looks like a balloon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 26 October, 2017, 11:48:49 PM
Quote from: Mardroid on 26 October, 2017, 06:06:22 PM
I found out recently that we'll be doing mandatory overtime starting next week.

On one hand, I'm happy as we get the time and a half pay, and I don't mind the extra day. I'm not keen on the fact they're adding an extra hour to each shift as well though (so 5 11 hours shifts rather than the usual 4 day 10 hours. ).

I have quite a bit of traveling, and I come in extra early too, as a certain bus is not reliable. I don't get enough sleep as it is... and it looks like things could get worse.

A small complaint really though. I'm now on my fifth week of permanent full time work with decent pay after months of temping/unemployment so I've a lot to be thankful for. I think I should seriously consider moving closer though, but not sure I should risk that until I've passed my probationary period (assuming that I do).

Best wishes on the probationary period.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 27 October, 2017, 09:16:13 AM
Thanks Sheridan.

Hope you get better soon Smith. Have you had it checked at the doctor's? I know one wouldn't normally do that with a sting. I'm just concerned if your arm has swollen that much you might have had an allergic reaction. Doubt it's that serious, but I think it's advisable to get checked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 27 October, 2017, 11:52:56 AM
I exaggerated a bit. :)
It should be fine in 2-3 days.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Eric Plumrose on 27 October, 2017, 03:20:37 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 24 October, 2017, 08:01:52 AM
Whilst it's not actually on White Hart Lane it's the name that was adopted by the brewery that owned the plot of land that used to be a nursery . . .

Soon as you said 'brewery', I recalled doing an online search a while back and it taking a surprisingly long time to find out. I'll be sure make mention to the next Spurs fan I meet who doesn't know. Cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 28 October, 2017, 10:55:00 AM
Quote from: Eric Plumrose on 27 October, 2017, 03:20:37 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 24 October, 2017, 08:01:52 AM
Whilst it's not actually on White Hart Lane it's the name that was adopted by the brewery that owned the plot of land that used to be a nursery . . .

Soon as you said 'brewery', I recalled doing an online search a while back and it taking a surprisingly long time to find out. I'll be sure make mention to the next Spurs fan I meet who doesn't know. Cheers!

A pleasure  :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 29 October, 2017, 04:16:29 AM
QuoteI got stung by a hornet.My arm looks like a balloon.

There was a young man from Dundee
Got stung on the leg by a wasp
When asked does it hurt
He said, 'Yes, it does.
'I'm so glad it wasn't a hornet.'

http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20160908-the-language-rules-we-know-but-dont-know-we-know (http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20160908-the-language-rules-we-know-but-dont-know-we-know)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 11 January, 2018, 10:12:55 AM
40 today :'(

I will accept any and all mid-life crisis advice from my fellow quadragenarian Squaxx Dek Thargo.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 January, 2018, 12:26:32 PM
Happy birthday. My advice; don't. Or do. It's up to you.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 11 January, 2018, 02:02:40 PM
Happy Birthday, Link. It's not all downhill from 40 just mostly!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 11 January, 2018, 02:25:00 PM
40 is great! When you're 50. Happy Birthday.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 11 January, 2018, 03:42:41 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 24 October, 2017, 08:01:52 AM
Quote from: Eric Plumrose on 23 October, 2017, 08:10:12 PM
Quote from: Mattofthespurs on 16 October, 2017, 06:03:36 PM
I get to watch the matches on TV but it's not the same.

Sorry to take this off on a tangent but no Spurs fan I've asked has ever been able to answer. What's with "Live! From White Hart Lane!" when the Spurs ground isn't actually on White Hart Lane?

Whilst it's not actually on White Hart Lane it's the name that was adopted by the brewery that owned the plot of land that used to be a nursery. Often directions to farmers in the late 1800's was White Hart Lane as there was nothing around the area at the time and the nursery, and then obviously the stadium that was built there, was clearly visible as it's only a couple of hundred yards away. It's actually on the High Road but in those days there wasn't a High road to mention of. The name stuck as the years went by and will when the new stadium is finished despite what it maybe called. The new stadium will actually be a 100 yards closer to White Hart Lane than the old one was.


Zero interest in spectator sports, but it did strike me that there were a few schools, a sports centre and not much else on White Hart Lane when I went there for a wheelchair conference.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 11 January, 2018, 04:56:16 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 11 January, 2018, 10:12:55 AM
40 today :'(

I will accept any and all mid-life crisis advice from my fellow quadragenarian Squaxx Dek Thargo.

Happy birthday,  Link.  It's only a mid life crisis if you plan to live to 80...

What I wouldn't give to be 40* again,  though! The vigour of youth,  the wisdom of age!


*apart from the bit where we got our fresh veggies from the bins behind the grocers, hid from the sheriff and couldn't afford the Prog... Come to think of it,  40 was shit. Roll on 50.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 11 January, 2018, 06:17:00 PM
Happy Birthday Link! 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 12 January, 2018, 11:15:29 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 11 January, 2018, 03:42:41 PM



Zero interest in spectator sports, but it did strike me that there were a few schools, a sports centre and not much else on White Hart Lane when I went there for a wheelchair conference.

In the 70's, when I started going there, it was a thriving community. My Dad lived a stone's throw from the ground from the 40's onwards until he moved slightly North in the late sixties to Enfield.

It's true that today there is nothing much there bar the ground but that's all changing, and most of it is thanks to the club.

As well as building the new stadium Spurs have agreed to build lots of affordable housing, a college (which is up and running), and are helping to regenerate the area in general. And not before time but it's a shame it took a privately owned football club to do it, although the help from the local council and the government has been good once Spurs put their hands in their pockets.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 12 January, 2018, 11:16:14 AM
Happy Birthday Link.
As someone who 'celebrates' their 50th Birthday this year I can tell you that 40 is a fine age to be.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 12 January, 2018, 04:11:28 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 11 January, 2018, 04:56:16 PM
It's only a mid life crisis if you plan to live to 80...

No guarantees to last that long of course Tordel, but I just need to get as far as the year that 'San Junipero' becomes reality.

Cheers everyone- over the shock of it now!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 January, 2018, 05:18:52 PM
To shamelessly nick a gag from Inside No9, if you hit 40 and get a sudden urge to deliver babies, you're having a midwife crisis.

For me, 30 and 40 were no big deal but I found 50 quite depressing cos that's proper middle aged. Hope you had a grand day!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 12 January, 2018, 06:10:28 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 12 January, 2018, 05:18:52 PM

For me, 30 and 40 were no big deal but I found 50 quite depressing cos that's proper middle aged. Hope you had a grand day!

Thanks for that. 9 months and counting....And I would dearly love that to be middle aged. Such high hopes I have.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 12 January, 2018, 06:31:34 PM
You're all sprogs!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 13 January, 2018, 07:43:52 PM
Happy birthday sir, and speaking as someone for whom 40 was a literal previous lifetime, I can affirm that it can get a lot better from there on in.

On the other hand, it can also get worse first, so keep that In mind. Being now two years off fifty, I'm very aware of living in my twilight years. An acquaintance swears blind I told her I didn't expect to live to see that particular milestone, so I take every day as it comes.
SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 13 January, 2018, 08:40:00 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 13 January, 2018, 07:43:52 PM
Happy birthday sir, and speaking as someone for whom 40 was a literal previous lifetime, I can affirm that it can get a lot better from there on in.

On the other hand, it can also get worse first, so keep that In mind. Being now two years off fifty, I'm very aware of living in my twilight years. An acquaintance swears blind I told her I didn't expect to live to see that particular milestone, so I take every day as it comes.
SBT

literal?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2018, 08:10:39 AM
Uh-oh... Chest pains. Think I might have pulled a muscle chopping down trees and moving the wood onto the bonfire. At least, I hope that's what it is.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 January, 2018, 10:40:43 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2018, 08:10:39 AM
Uh-oh... Chest pains. Think I might have pulled a muscle chopping down trees and moving the wood onto the bonfire. At least, I hope that's what it is.

Sounds like it, but maybe go get some organ-of-the-illegitimate-state-apparatus medico to have a look at the same time.  As you know, these things are better fixed sooner, rather than later.  Not heart-related, but I'm currently on a day between two funerals, one of someone who didn't go to the doc, and one who was waiting on a specialist appointment.  No need for a third, eh? 

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2018, 10:48:40 AM
Thanks, Tordels. I'm aware that it might be serious but I'm on my own at the farm for the next few days and the animals need seeing to and whatnot until the boss gets back on Monday night. My plan is to take it easy until then, stay alert and then see somebody on Tuesday if I think I need to.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2018, 11:33:28 AM
I'm sorry about your friends, Tordels. Please forgive me for not saying so in my last post - I can get a bit selfish when I'm preoccupied.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 20 January, 2018, 12:00:53 PM
watch yerself Sharkie, not good to be out and about on your own if the tickers a bit dodgy...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 20 January, 2018, 12:03:08 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 January, 2018, 11:33:28 AM
I'm sorry about your friends, Tordels. Please forgive me for not saying so in my last post - I can get a bit selfish when I'm preoccupied.

Not at all, was just using them to pressure you!  Untreated illness on my mind a lot lately, so once you stop interfering with the livestock go waste some valuable medical resources toot sweet.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 January, 2018, 03:06:00 PM
Since being diagnosed with mild angina a couple of years back I'm paranoid about chest pains- last week I had some that the GTN spray weren't shifting so I headed to A&E hoping to get a quick ecg. I knew it may take hours but I didn't expect to be discharged three days later after an angiogram- turned out the ticker was fine must've just just been muscular. Felt guilty for bed blocking but glad to be reassured.

Sorry for your loss TB
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 21 January, 2018, 07:49:21 PM
Cheers DDD, was going to say 'no biggie, just friends from long ago',  but having just returned from the funeral I'm not so sure: it was beautifully done,  but genuinely harrowing.   

From the sudden onset of severe anxiety to suicide in just 5 weeks, one of the most energetic,  positive,  intelligent, affable and accomplished men I've known, just gone - leaving a wife and three young kids behind.

Do me a favour squaxx, if you're having problems with your thinking and feeling organ,  go see someone,  and don't take 'no' or 'take a number' for an answer. Sometimes, maybe often, even talking to family and friends about it just isn't enough: sometimes you need professional help, same as with any other severe illness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 January, 2018, 08:14:23 PM
Well said, Tordels, and my deepest condolences to you.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 21 January, 2018, 08:37:52 PM
Blimey Tordels.  So sorry for you and good advice.

A colleague of mine lost her dad a couple of weeks ago to suicide too.  It just makes you realise how quickly people can become ill.   As you say, if you can then please talk to someone.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 22 January, 2018, 05:20:39 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 21 January, 2018, 07:49:21 PM
Do me a favour squaxx, if you're having problems with your thinking and feeling organ,  go see someone,  and don't take 'no' or 'take a number' for an answer.

2nd from me here.  Long time since the Black Dog Thread has seen any traffic and hopefully that is an indicator of how fellow boarders are coping.  Personally on that score I've always found this place the most compassionate and supportive place going when 'having a wobble'.  I know there are some crap GP's out there but persist and insist on seeing another one if you aren't happy. 

I've got several kids I teach who lost their father in the last few months to this.  Having a cousin who took advantage of his service weapon in Iraq and the damage it has done to his wife and kids ...  It may 'feel' like no one gives a shit but that is not true.

Keeping you in thoughts Tordels.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 22 January, 2018, 09:08:40 AM
Thanks guys. But I should clarify that it's not really 'my' loss in any real sense, he and his wife were friends from long ago, and we only occasionally saw each other in recent years, although now of course I wish it had been otherwise.  But yesterday, seeing the impact on his wife, his mother, other closer friends, his family and even the wider community.... jesus.  I've been to too many of these types of funeral, but this one got to me more than most, in part I think because this was a man I always - envied isn't the right word - admired maybe, with a dollop of self-reproach?  He had achieved a kind of life I once aspired to, and subsequently idly idealised, but knew I couldn't emulate.  And yet it ended in the most terrible emotional pain, and now, nothing.

Still, and selfishly, waking up this morning beside my warm but grumpy wife, dealing with my shitty elderly cats, inhaling the scent of my kids' hair even as I berated them about lunchboxes left in schoolbags since Friday, I had a new appreciation for being alive, and a determination to be better. Me, me, me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 22 January, 2018, 06:35:47 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 January, 2018, 09:08:40 AM
.... even as I berated them about lunchboxes left in schoolbags since Friday, I had a new appreciation for being alive, and a determination to be better. Me, me, me.

Aye, because nothing speaks to the joy of life like three day old mouldy sandwiches boxes, does it!   ::)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 23 January, 2018, 01:48:59 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 21 January, 2018, 07:49:21 PM
if you're having problems with your thinking and feeling organ,  go see someone,  and don't take 'no' or 'take a number' for an answer. Sometimes, maybe often, even talking to family and friends about it just isn't enough: sometimes you need professional help, same as with any other severe illness.

I wish to endorse this comment, from experience. I've had serious difficulties with anxiety for much of my adult life, and last year reached crisis point. I eventually sought help and it saved my life.

Life's pretty great for me now. It can get better. It was only ever mixed-up brain soup, and I'm glad I found that out.

Sending you best wishes, TB.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2018, 07:03:34 PM
Digging a ditch today, got the pain again so bit the bullet. In hospital now, docs say it was a heart attack. Buggeration.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Old Tankie on 27 January, 2018, 07:15:59 PM
Get well soon Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Steve Green on 27 January, 2018, 07:37:48 PM
Get well soon Shark!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 27 January, 2018, 07:52:06 PM
Glad you went to see the quacks. Get well Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 27 January, 2018, 08:26:08 PM
Ach, sorry to hear that. Get well soon, Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 27 January, 2018, 08:42:34 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2018, 07:03:34 PM
Digging a ditch today, got the pain again so bit the bullet. In hospital now, docs say it was a heart attack. Buggeration.

Holy shit,  lad. Even Sharks only have one of those!  Hope they are taking good care of you,  and that you've someone looking after your dog just as well - if not,  drop me a line,  my missus has contacts in the animal welfare world, sure we could work out something if you're laid up for a bit.

In the meantime,  try not to objectify the female health care professionals too much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 27 January, 2018, 10:20:24 PM
Blimey shark.  I am so glad they are treating you now before it gets worse.  Wishing you all the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 27 January, 2018, 11:00:55 PM
Thanks, guys. Fortunately, it doesn't look too bad this time around and I should be released back into the wild tomorrow.

Thanks for thinking of my dog, Tordels - he's being looked after at the farm for now and probably fast asleep, stuffed and content by now.

I'm trying not to objectify the nurses, honest, but one of them's an absolute stunner who's just been talking to me about her dog whilst sticking sensors all over me. Even when life's bad, life's good!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 28 January, 2018, 07:47:22 AM
Sad about the heart attack but glad you're better Shark. Take care of yourself.

As for the dog, a farm must be doggie heaven!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 28 January, 2018, 08:40:30 AM
Adding thoughts in Sharky!  Now you need to dial down on the political thread.  Don't want to put too much strain on the ticker!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 28 January, 2018, 09:00:23 AM
Don't listen to him Shark!  We all know it's only stubborn iconoclasm and utopian schmaltz that holds you together!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 28 January, 2018, 10:58:29 AM
Take it very easy Shark. You've had quite a shock and so have the rest of us!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 January, 2018, 01:12:04 PM
Thanks, everyone, your kind wishes are much appreciated :)  To update, I'm stuck in Southport hospital until a cardiac bed comes free in Liverpool for a minor heart op; could be today, could be as late as Thursday. So there's no rush, no great emergency and no need for anyone to worry too much.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 28 January, 2018, 01:25:56 PM
Glad to hear you're doing well Sharky. I'm sure they'll get you sorted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 28 January, 2018, 01:28:11 PM
Sweet baby Jovus! Sharky- you take care mate, and keep us informed- is there anyone we can contact 'off board' for news?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 28 January, 2018, 01:38:28 PM
Good luck shark.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 29 January, 2018, 11:40:23 AM
Best wishes Sharky, hope you brought some decent reading material for the wait.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 January, 2018, 12:25:31 PM
Got my laptop. Currently listening to the audiobook of "The Martian," by Andy Weir. Some depressing fellow patients in here, from the desperately chipper to the deluded would-be escapee to the comatose fly-catcher.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 29 January, 2018, 04:51:55 PM
Hey Sharkie, take care and stop digging fecking ditches !!!

Stay strong.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2018, 05:57:39 PM
Been moved to Broad Green Super Serious Heart Hospital in Liverpool. Got here just in time for tea. Result!

Scans, tests, probes and whatnot tomorrow.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 January, 2018, 06:25:32 PM
Are you having an angiogram? I had one a couple of weeks ago when I was admitted with chest pains (that turned out NOT to be a heart attack thankfully) - it's not painful, biut it's a very weird sensation as they feed a thin camera wire from your wrist up through the arteries in your your arm (or via your groin if they fancy) and into your heart.

Get well soon Sharky!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2018, 06:55:04 PM
I had five stents fitted a few years ago in a similar procedure. The theory is that one or more of them has closed up, so they're going to investigate tomorrow. Angiogram is definitely on the cards.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: maryanddavid on 30 January, 2018, 08:29:00 PM
Keep the spirits up Sharky, coming from a family full of stents (not me, yet!) they really are a little piece of magic.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 30 January, 2018, 09:11:13 PM
FIVE? Bloody hell - they were talking about sticking one in me, but decided it wasn't needed. Just ask for one of those plasteen hearts we keep hearing about.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2018, 09:24:31 PM
Yep. Five. In one sitting.

How's that for punk at heart?

;)

Thanks MaryandDavid - I'm a fan too!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Theblazeuk on 30 January, 2018, 10:03:44 PM
Good luck Sharky! Keep us posted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 30 January, 2018, 10:22:44 PM
Good luck,Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2018, 10:48:35 PM
Thanks, everyone. Be lying if I said I wasn't a little apprehensive - but only a little. I'm pretty sure everything's going to turn out fine and if not, well, a certain few small press comics are going to become proper collector's items!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SuperSurfer on 31 January, 2018, 04:11:18 AM
Best wishes, Sharky.

Keep your pectoral up!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 31 January, 2018, 08:52:57 AM
Thinking of you Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 09:09:52 AM
Just about to go in for my angiogram, after a very cheerful conversation with the angiogram man in which he explained all the ways it could go slightly, moderately or catastrophically wrong.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2018, 10:31:15 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 09:09:52 AM
Just about to go in for my angiogram, after a very cheerful conversation with the angiogram man in which he explained all the ways it could go slightly, moderately or catastrophically wrong.

If you ask me this saga has all the hallmarks of PJ Maybe.  Chances are Sharky's original heart is already in the Black Museum, and these are just more cyborg enhancements he's getting so that he can better bring down all states and rule participate as a leather-chap-ed dictator local community facilitator (while continuing to cut a murderous swathe through those who have slighted him).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 10:47:19 AM
Heh, rumbled!

All done. An existing stent had closed up so it had to be re-opened and a new one fitted. Took a longer time than the last operation and was more uncomfortable but, hey, I'm still alive!

Thanks for your support, everyone - you're all brilliant!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 31 January, 2018, 11:36:53 AM
(https://i.imgur.com/uV1vGIv.gif)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 11:39:09 AM


:D


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2018, 02:04:15 PM
I suppose hearty congrats are in order for your continued survival, but I'm still keeping an eye out for any suspiciously pneumatic Hershey lookalikes in your company from now on...

:thumbsup:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 02:25:51 PM
I've ordered the "Classy Cassy" model.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 31 January, 2018, 02:28:22 PM
Grand news Sharky! Do you have to register as cyborg or non-human now? ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 02:52:36 PM
I hope not - I'm already on enough registers as it is...


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 31 January, 2018, 04:57:00 PM
Quote from: von Boom on 31 January, 2018, 02:28:22 PM
Grand news Sharky! Do you have to register as cyborg or non-human now? ;)

Mr Ninety-Five Per Cent it is  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 06:30:42 PM
Back home in my shed with an insanely happy dog. Looking forward to an unbroken night's sleep.

Thank you all so much for your kind words, offers of help and support - it meant a great deal to me and was (and is) deeply appreciated.

This is the best place on the web!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 January, 2018, 07:08:37 PM
Very good to hear you're safely home. Sleep tight, Sharkie Gruber.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 31 January, 2018, 09:26:41 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 09:09:52 AM
Just about to go in for my angiogram, after a very cheerful conversation with the angiogram man in which he explained all the ways it could go slightly, moderately or catastrophically wrong.
An acquaintance had to get circumcised. For medical reasons. At the age of thirty-ish.

Apprehensive, he turned to the internet for reassurance. Listed amongst the potential side effects: bleeding, discomfort, DEATH.

Very glad to hear you're well. One convincing argument for the state.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 09:42:45 PM
Not a convincing argument for the state: a convincing argument for medical science. Medical science devises treatments, the state decides who deserves to be treated.

Thank Grud - they left my anarchy muscle intact! :)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 31 January, 2018, 09:52:58 PM
And, in the interests of exercising your new heart, our state (which is indivisible from us) has decided that everyone should be treated.

Grud bless.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 January, 2018, 10:15:25 PM
Pregnant Brit forced to prove nationality by NHS after taking Polish husband's name. (http://metro.co.uk/2017/10/21/pregnant-woman-denied-nhs-treatment-after-taking-polish-husbands-name-7016266/)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 01 February, 2018, 08:34:19 AM
...and he's back to normal.

Don't you ever change, Sharky.

Glad to hear you're back safe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 01 February, 2018, 10:38:42 AM
Good to hear you're back and in a positive spirit.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 February, 2018, 11:48:45 AM
Thanks, chaps. You can't keep a good shark down - or a bad one! :)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: ZenArcade on 01 February, 2018, 05:17:37 PM
More fish and seal meat for that Shark.  Z
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 02 February, 2018, 06:12:50 PM
Quote from: I, Cosh on 31 January, 2018, 09:52:58 PM
And, in the interests of exercising your new heart, our state (which is indivisible from us) has decided that everyone should be treated.

Grud bless.

I hope, despite your government's best efforts, it stays that way. It's not perfect, but it's better than our system, and far, far better than the US privilege-based one.

But that's for the political thread.  Delighted to hear you're better, Sharky, and long may you shark.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 February, 2018, 06:43:37 PM

Nice one Sharkie.  Welcome back.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 February, 2018, 07:03:14 PM
Thank you :)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 02 February, 2018, 11:04:35 PM
Keep well Sharky.

I seem to have spent most of this evening trying to install Windows 10. Which seems to be incompatible with my current usb wireless dongle.

On the plus side I did find a whole folder of old photographs in a drive and the lovely Alex Ronald Dredd cover for Zarjaz is back as my screen background.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 February, 2018, 11:15:48 PM
My minor impediment this evening is that I watched a You Tube clip of TNGs The Drumhead, which was presented in that format as an example of Picard 'destroying' a SJW.

Let that sink in for a minute.  Jean-Luc Picard, of Star Trek, defending a crewman from a racist/speciesist Admiral,  was striking a blow against social justice warriors.

And now I can't get it the cultural ramifications out of my mind.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 02 February, 2018, 11:29:24 PM
Sounds like time for a new episode of Tordels and The Shark.  Maybe revived as a retro audio play.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 02 February, 2018, 11:40:01 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 February, 2018, 11:15:48 PM
My minor impediment this evening is that I watched a You Tube clip of TNGs The Drumhead, which was presented in that format as an example of Picard 'destroying' a SJW.

Let that sink in for a minute.  Jean-Luc Picard, of Star Trek, defending a crewman from a racist/speciesist Admiral,  was striking a blow against social justice warriors.

And now I can't get it the cultural ramifications out of my mind.

Why?

Why would you watch something like that, instead of the original episode?

You're voluntarily sticking your head in a sewer and then expressing suprise at the horrible smell.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 February, 2018, 11:56:13 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 02 February, 2018, 11:04:35 PM
Keep well Sharky.

I seem to have spent most of this evening trying to install Windows 10. Which seems to be incompatible with my current usb wireless dongle.




Thanks, Tips.

Why not try downloading one of the Linux operating systems? I use Linux Mint but there are others. You can run them from a dvd or usb stick to try them out before installing. I find my Mint to be easy to use, very stable, well supported, possessed of as many bells and whistles as you could possibly need, very secure and completely free. I'll never go back to Microshaft.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Trout on 03 February, 2018, 01:58:20 AM
I missed all the drama! I'm glad you came through that horrible experience with your irrepressible good humour, Shark!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 February, 2018, 06:54:48 AM
Quote from: Mister Pops on 02 February, 2018, 11:40:01 PMYou're voluntarily sticking your head in a sewer and then expressing suprise at the horrible smell.

This is so true.  I just saw the little thumbnail of Picard as I was searching for videos of giant waves (YouTube knows me so well), and off into the abyss I went. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 February, 2018, 07:08:11 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 02 February, 2018, 11:56:13 PM
I'll never go back to Microshaft.

Recently forced to install Office Live by the company I'm working for to facilitate joint editing of docs,   after many years keeping MS on other people's machines and Open Source on my own.  It's OK,  if you're not paying for it yourself,  and Windows 10 on my kid's laptop hasn't been any bother (touch wood), but I can't see myself ever bothering again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 03 February, 2018, 01:44:58 PM
rather disturbiung piece about how Youtube's "up next" algorithm works: https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/feb/02/how-youtubes-algorithm-distorts-truth (https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/feb/02/how-youtubes-algorithm-distorts-truth)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 February, 2018, 01:58:03 PM
Good read that, cheers DDD.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 03 February, 2018, 02:19:05 PM
I use my home PC to work from home on occassion and I know the MS stuff works with the company software. I'd have a bit of a struggle seeing if it works with all of the other stuff.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 03 February, 2018, 04:51:56 PM
That's how they get you, Tips. Speaking as one thrust into that very boat.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 03 February, 2018, 10:06:37 PM
Christ but I'm late to this one  :o
Sharky, so glad you're ok man. Please try to keep it that way!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 03 February, 2018, 10:17:43 PM
Cheers - I'll certainly try!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JamesC on 07 February, 2018, 12:25:36 PM
I fell down the stairs this morning in a Norman Wisdom type way, bashing the shit out of my back and landing in a painful heap at the foot of the stairs groaning. The cat I was carrying ran off traumatised (for about 5 minutes, then she came back wondering where her breakfast was).
It's not all bad though - it's necessitated a day off work and after application of an ice pack and a couple of ibuprofen I've spent the morning catching up on comics I've been meaning to read. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 February, 2018, 12:31:02 PM
Ouch, glad you're okay and have located the silver lining.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 07 February, 2018, 04:48:20 PM
Ouch, James. Glad you're okay, but if you're still in any significant pain after a few days see the quacks.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 07 February, 2018, 10:20:58 PM
My impediments are self inflicted from 5-a-side. Cracked right elbow, pulled right calf, dodgy left knee cap.

I'm getting too old for this. Please, let them take me quietly aside after one game and ask "Tips, have you ever considered Walking Football? There are local leagues, you know."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 08 February, 2018, 10:29:19 AM
It's a Warzone here all of a sudden. Hope bad backs, cracked elbows and dodgy tickers all heal well. JamesC has it right with long hours of comic perusal. That's the best medicine and rest of course.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 09 February, 2018, 12:13:09 PM
Hi All! The Black Dog has kept me off out of the loop for a while so I'm just catching up on things now. I hope that you're well on the mend now, Sharkey - ya can't keep a good man down, as they say - and like wise to yourself, James C and any other forumites who might have been afflicted with life's vicissitudes lately.

And just for your good self, Tips, I think I've located an alternative football league for you - at the link below -to try out. But beware, these guys play rough, lol. All the best! - Paddy Kafka

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwmmX0Ms3D0
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 09 February, 2018, 12:36:06 PM
Glad you've kicked that dog out, PK - thanks and welcome back.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 11 February, 2018, 12:46:30 PM
Because my agoraphobia and depression have decided to rear their heads again. Seems it can go for  ages and I start to believe it might be over then it just hits out of nowhere.   Total pisser.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 11 February, 2018, 01:25:37 PM
My best to you, Fishy. I hope you can push through it as quickly and as painlessly as possible.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 11 February, 2018, 01:42:50 PM
That's a shame to hear Fishy. All the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 11 February, 2018, 01:49:05 PM
Thank you guys.  That's kind.

Yeah just have to try to ride it out again.  So fucking exhausting.   I shouldn't be too shocked as the anxiety never goes but the worst side effects just subside some times.   I am grateful when they do.  Looking forward to being able to drop back from the rat race in a couple of years when done with funding my boys uni days, wil do my mental health the world of good.  The software world never slows down, the intellectual demands are exhausting and I'm definitely getting to end of my days doing it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 11 February, 2018, 02:17:03 PM
That's the hardest thing at times, when something triggers it out of left field.  More than likely it's been a series of things building up to the final straw.  Stay strong fishy, loads of people pulling for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 11 February, 2018, 02:29:17 PM
Thanks tjm.  That's really kind, yeah I am sure you are right.  Never notice it until it tips over the edge.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 February, 2018, 01:30:28 PM
Hang in there, Fishy. Last year I reverted back to a horrendous depression I thought had disappeared forever, but I'm fine now.  It gets better.

On a less important note, the fucking rat that has taken up residence on my houseboat seems to know how to spring traps and make off with the bait.  It has already shredded my best jumper and irreplaceable  parts of my furniture upholstery to make a nest.

  I don't want to use poison (it's a horrible death and people's pets are around) but I've set a humane cage trap while I'm away for a few days.  Thing is, depositing rats more than 100 yards from their home apparently guarantees them a nastier and slower death than a conventional trap. Other thing is, the fecker's probably way too smart to walk into a cage.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 February, 2018, 01:53:21 PM
Get a terrier. Nature's way is swift and merciless.

Also, cuddly :D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 14 February, 2018, 03:27:06 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 February, 2018, 01:53:21 PM
Get a terrier. Nature's way is swift and merciless.

Also, cuddly :D

My folks used to have one. Good at catching rats,  shit at everything else,  including pissing outside instead of on the currains, leaving the flowers and shrubs intact,  and shutting the fuck up at night time.

I'm more a cat person but can't be arsed with that either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 February, 2018, 03:58:48 PM
Heh, mine's an absolute joy - I wouldn't be without him. Best dog I ever had.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 14 February, 2018, 04:14:02 PM
That's sweet Sharky. You actually believe you're in charge. ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 February, 2018, 04:23:06 PM
Hell no - it's more of an anarcho-syndicalist partnership focused on superior canine directives and requirements via the unqualified subordination of human-centric considerations.

Hang on a minute...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 14 February, 2018, 04:25:08 PM
Dogs have owners, cats have servants.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 17 February, 2018, 11:00:28 PM
Thanks jayz, it's encouraging to hear that.  The old dog never goes away forever but good to hear it can bigger off again for a while.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Something Fishy on 17 February, 2018, 11:01:27 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 14 February, 2018, 04:25:08 PM
Dogs have owners, cats have servants.  :D

Pigs have equals?   I'm sure I read Churchill say something like that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 22 February, 2018, 10:53:33 AM
"In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this."

Terry Pratchett.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 27 March, 2018, 11:06:35 AM
Quote from: Something Fishy on 17 February, 2018, 11:01:27 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 14 February, 2018, 04:25:08 PM
Dogs have owners, cats have servants.  :D

Pigs have equals?   I'm sure I read Churchill say something like that.

(https://cdn.images.dailystar.co.uk/dynamic/1/281x351/214632_1.jpg)

oh yes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 April, 2018, 12:19:37 PM
I was awoken by the smoke alarm that went off in the business premises beside my flat at 4.10am this morning. I rang the local cop shop at 4.15am, spoke to an officer and gave him the necessary details. I asked if he could contact the local keyholders and was told that he would look into it.

Five hours and twenty minutes later the alarm was still ringing, as it had done so consistently throughout the night. So I got onto the business website and round-robined an email to every member of staff / management listed there, requesting them to get a keyholder out to the premises.

To be fair, the head-honcho of the business replied to my email and she had a guy out within the hour. It turns out that their system is banjaxed and needs to be upgraded. But at least the damn alarm has been switched off.

The lady who emailed me said that she had been in touch with the alarm company who monitor the company's fire and intruder alarm 24/7. They told her that the alarm hadn't gone off at all and assured her that they would know if it had. What made me laugh though, was that she wondered if it was any other alarm going off in the area. (I did briefly question my own sanity on this, until I spoke to a very aggrieved neighbour outside whose infant grand-daughter had been kept awake all night by the racket).

I assured this woman that, as I was living directly beside the business itself, I could indeed confirm that the alarm in question was most definitely functioning to an extremely loud degree, and that if she would like to call me up on my mobile I would be happy to stand outside the premises and provide the necessary validation.

I have not heard back from her since.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 April, 2018, 03:42:59 PM
Having gone to hell and back the last 18 months with a very friendly employer who really does not seem to like staff with mental health conditions, my union informed me on Friday that a settlement offer had been made that would allow time to get over the crap they've put me through and prepare myself for the new job that I was offered. 

Now saying since I have a job to go to in September they're withdrawing the cash part of the settlement that would have seen us through until then, leaving on monday rather than the end of August as per my contract.  Union looking into the legality but pretty sure that since it was only agreed in principle its unlikely to stand scrutiny.  So looks like it's going to be back into the hell hole, fighting off a spurious disciplinary and a complaint against boss for discrimination.

Said it before and I'll say it again; do not disclose mental health problems to employers.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 April, 2018, 03:51:21 PM
That's appalling, Tjm.

If it were me I'd just leave and find another path. However, that's just me - I don't have a family, mortgage or debts to worry about so it probably doesn't help you in the least. Sorry.

Is there any way you could do what you do for yourself, as a freelancer or something?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 April, 2018, 04:25:53 PM
I'm a teacher so yes and no.  It would take time to get the Disclosure Barring Service check.

I am trying to leave.  In fact I've got a job to go to.  It's very very clear they don't want me there and they've actually managed to achieve a complete relapse on my BPD which I was actually getting on top of until I started working there.  The original settlement would have allowed me to undo a lot of their damage with luck and hard work.

It gets better though.  I've now been asked to provide a sick note for a period of time that I was not expected to work.

Sorry for ranting, I just needed to let off steam somewhere safe.

Thanks for listening.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 April, 2018, 04:37:24 PM
Rant away, mate, that's what we're here for.

This place has helped me through some difficult times so I reckon it'll help you too. I'm just a pm or email away if you need some private venting.

Strength and love.

TLS.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 26 April, 2018, 04:44:30 PM
Can't offer any advice or help Tjm, but have a biccy :)

(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/08/27/11/439AEE7600000578-4827338-image-m-3_1503829076508.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 April, 2018, 04:46:47 PM
Cheers.  Got any Bourbon's though?  Not a fan of Custard Creams (sorry, being picky aren't I).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 26 April, 2018, 04:48:58 PM
(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/fd/ce/4a/fdce4a2470eadf9f0a5ed7c08bc7be35.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 April, 2018, 06:15:29 PM
Ta.  Do like a nice bourbon.  Something very comforting about them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 26 April, 2018, 06:59:52 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 26 April, 2018, 06:15:29 PM
Ta.  Do like a nice bourbon.  Something very comforting about them.

Nice palaces and all.

Feck 'em all Tjm, and rant away.  Employers!

Currently getting a pile of passive-aggressive grief because one of the supervisors I'm tasked with wrangling has turned out to be a bit of a waste of space, and I didn't pick up on it (most of the supervisory staff are a little less stellar than I might wish for, and the regular joes are so fresh out of college that degree conferrals are the main reason given for days off: but you get what you're given and do the best you can with them).

Unfortunately I formally stuck up for the bloke a month or two back after an issue arose with his team, partly out of a long-held belief that shit goes up and not down, and partly because he's a decent intelligent guy, and as a result I have the sinking suspicion that I'm going to get the boot at the end of my current contract, despite working my arse off to get it complete on time. 

Bearing in mind that I didn't hire or appoint the bugger, there's no personnel review process for contract staff, he's been off sick and/or on holidays for more than half the time I've had him, and my line manager only twigged the situation because of an incidental conversation with a previous employer, it seems a bit unfair to be getting the blame for not picking him out as a problem. Doubly unfortunate, as I've really enjoyed the job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 26 April, 2018, 07:58:28 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 26 April, 2018, 06:59:52 PM

Nice palaces and all.


What is really depressing is how many heads that one is likely to go over.  Royal joke my friend, nice one.

I don't know what it is about British business and industry and their contempt for staff.  That plus seeing experience as a threat.  No wonder this country is going to hell in a hand basket. (and now we morph to the political thread).

I do remember years ago pointing out to my Corporal that shit does in fact flow uphill.  My reasoning being that a decent supervisor will be responsible for their staff.  That said, a decent boss is worth its weight in gold.  I've worked for some fantastic ones down through the years.  The most recent ones .... least said, soonest mended?

Bit bizarre mind if you are getting grief because of supporting a nipper that has played them a blinder.  If the lad (?) is a problem then that is surely on them, not on their contract staff who can only speak as they find.   I'd agree that it is unfair and unjust.  Maybe this explains the UK productivity problem?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 30 April, 2018, 10:44:01 PM
Bah, today I did indeed get my marching orders for two months time. 

Rather inopportune timing as I'm currently trying to negotiate myself out of a court repossession order on my home, the success of which largely depends on demonstrating a consistent income to be shovelled down the bank's maw. 

I know I'm not the greatest at my job, but nor am I by any means the worst, and I'm feeling a bit aggrieved about it, since a simple reading of the situation is that the more serious problems derive from the fractious consortium setup that is over the job.  I've had a largely inexperienced and inconsistent crew to manage over a singularly shitty winter, and as far as I can tell (from the dribbles of budget info I get) am still on target to complete the current project, but I seem to have become a handy whipping boy in the (inevitable) fight between two partners in the consortium: initially I was guilty of just not driving the crew on fast enough, but when I pointed out in my defence that the crew had to be trained up more or less from scratch while on the job (not easy when there are 30+ of them), the failing changed to not having trained them properly.  Further arguing this point on my part just places me in direct conflict with HR, who did the hiring, and also determine the length of my contract, so for that fight there is no possible victory.

Been working for these lads more or less full-time for over four years now (initially self-employed, PAYE the last two), and it's just an endless series of short term (as in one-month long) contracts, so I suppose I need to accept they have no interest in retaining me beyond the immediately convenient.  A pity, since I have enjoyed both the people and the work.

Perhaps more problematic, the other consortium partner is *by far* the majority employer in my industry, and despite never having worked for them directly my name is even now being kicked back and forward in meetings as a grievance football so that nobody has to say anything unforgivable about each other. Not an auspicious boost for the already battered reputation.

Rant, vent, rant, vent.  Apologies, was either typing this over a beer, or silent fuming.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JOE SOAP on 30 April, 2018, 11:01:06 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 30 April, 2018, 10:44:01 PM
Bah, today I did indeed get my marching orders for two months time. 

Rather inopportune timing as I'm currently trying to negotiate myself out of a court repossession order on my home

FFS, Tords. Never rains but it pours. Reposessions or the threat of are so pointless for the average family. Don't give the lizards an inch.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 01 May, 2018, 01:33:39 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 26 April, 2018, 06:59:52 PM...the regular joes are so fresh out of college that degree conferrals are the main reason given for days off...


Sorry to focus on just this bit, but what is a degree conferral?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 01 May, 2018, 05:26:33 AM
Quote from: TordelBack on 30 April, 2018, 10:44:01 PM
Rant, vent, rant, vent.  Apologies, was either typing this over a beer, or silent fuming.

Having currently experienced very similar management behaviour I can fully sympathise so vent away.  This is the worst face of British business and industry for my money; lack of management skills and accountability.  It really does seem to be a cultural thing now.  No wonder we have a productivity problem in this country.

The idea of HR is something that personally disgusts me.  'Human Resources'?  It's as if people are on the same level as the office furniture although as someone once pointed out, some bosses value the furniture higher as they can at least sell it on.  Businesses forget that their employees are taking just as much of a risk on them as they are, if not more since employees may well need a reference to move on.  I know this is nowhere near universal but it's far too common.

Sorry that we can offer little more than a listening ear and moral support but a lot of folks pulling for you here.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 01 May, 2018, 06:08:45 AM
Ah maudlin drunk posting, how I haven't missed you. An entirely sleepless night later and it seems very stupid to be trotting all this out here. But many thanks for the supportive comments all the same.

Quote from: sheridan on 01 May, 2018, 01:33:39 AM
Sorry to focus on just this bit, but what is a degree conferral?

College graduation ceremony (but most of these would be 1-year post-grad degrees, so I'm using the more general term!). No prob with people starting out with no experience, all have to do it, just highlighting the extreme freshness.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 May, 2018, 06:28:57 AM
Bloody Hell, Tordels, that's really upsetting. There used to be a useful site about dealing with mortgage problems at www.getoutofdebtfree.org which is still there but seems to have changed its character. It might be of some help, though.

The world is run by bastards but I sincerely hope you fight them off soon.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 01 May, 2018, 09:08:08 AM
Really shite to hear that Tordel.
Rootin' for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mattofthespurs on 01 May, 2018, 03:39:54 PM
Bugger, Tords. Simply bugger.

:(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 01 May, 2018, 03:41:12 PM
Very shitty news Tordel. Hope it works out for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 01 May, 2018, 04:14:41 PM
Just to reflect what other posters have said, Tordel's. Hope things work out for ye. In relation to the work situation, it might not be a bad idea to contact Citizen's Information to see if they can offer you advice. It does seem that you are being unfairly scapegoated for a situation outside of your control. That said, you could write what I know about industrial relations legislation on the back of an envelope. But if your work reputation and future employment prospects are being damaged or undermined for reasons that you are not responsible for, then natural justice should surely apply here? (The threat of legal action of itself might go some way towards giving your soon-to-be-former employers pause for thought in how they have dealt with you).

The best of luck to you anyway.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 01 May, 2018, 06:37:58 PM
Sorry to hear about your trouble, TB, and hope it all works out for you.

But what I'm hearing is that the company took a contract and then assigned untrained staff, and if they persist in maligning yourself, they assigned untrained staff with someone the company didn't think was up to the job of training those staff?  Got to be some way of stirring shit with that info.
People on the ground usually have some dirt on how a company is mismanaged or bending rules, and if they're going to fuck you, it seems your best defence might be to fuck them harder - it certainly doesn't sound like they've done anything to engender your loyalty.  I imagine you've also got to be worried about the next reputation those bullshitters will destroy or contract they'll mess up, too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 02 May, 2018, 11:42:55 AM
Cheers gents, didn't really mean to descend into a poor-me fest, it's very small beer in the scheme of things, and I'm sure I'll be able wangle my way out of any serious consequences.  It's not worth arguing the toss, but I'll put my view of the situation to my employers anyway, and then I'll just move on.

I think my negative reaction is because I had pretty-much shelved my own small business in favour of a lower-but-more-reliable PAYE income, the better to convince my bank of my reliability in my endless attempts to get my house out of hock (I've cleared all my other debts, this is the last - and biggest - one).  Now I'll have neither, and I'm in court (again) in one month's time to demonstrate my reformed financial character to the judge's satisfaction!

But look, I went into the current project with eyes open as to my likely position as scapegoat between two companies, and with hindsight I should - as a result - have been far more of a hard-ass with the crew than I was: it was hard to judge how much abuse the combination of 6 months of shitty weather, a gaggle of unblooded college kids and a handful of weary underpaid embittered types could actually handle.  I suspect that no matter how hard I whipped them it wouldn't have been enough for TPTB, but perhaps physical evidence of infected welts might have saved me.  As it is, I still seem to be on track to complete the project on time, and with less people than projected, so it's difficult to get a handle on just what would have made everyone happy.

Anyway, it'll get sorted, and thanks all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 02 May, 2018, 12:41:40 PM
Aw crap, sorry to hear that. Hope things work out ok in the end.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 02 May, 2018, 04:46:17 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 02 May, 2018, 11:42:55 AM
Anyway, it'll get sorted, and thanks all.
Sounds rough but I hope this bit works out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 02 May, 2018, 06:34:10 PM
Hi Tordels,

With regard to whipping the staff into shape, the attached image below might serve you as a useful starting point.

Cheers! - Paddy Kafka

https://www.redbubble.com/people/divebargraphics/works/10994810-the-beatings-will-continue-until-morale-improves?p=t-shirt

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 23 August, 2018, 06:40:27 PM
Today I had the day off work so that I could attend a friend's funeral.  We have a bar at work (well, in one of the buildings our company is based in) and I'd been there a few times with people from work, usually around pay day, or when somebody was leaving, but Dave was one of the first people from work that I socialised with but didn't actually work with.  The service, and the wake following it, were held at places that Dave had been just two years ago after the death of his best friend Hirdy (another of those people from work who aren't work colleagues).  The two of them were great at music quizzes, and Hirdy was pretty mean at pool.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Professor Bear on 31 August, 2018, 10:53:02 AM
Despite a six foot fence around the garden, a dog has been getting in to my 4yo husky bitch, climbing up the metalwork of the iron gate (also 6 foot) with his big gorilla-like arms.  This is one goofy-looking dog, a mix of what looks like Labrador and some sort of bulldog, I don't think he's actually capable of running in a straight line - shambling as he does in a sort of diagonal gait that constantly has him veering onto the road in front of traffic that barely stops in time - and I admire the effort he puts in to busting a nut, but the maths are terrible for whatever mutant offspring might result from this unholy union even if I could countenance the idea of letting her try to squeeze out a half dozen of those goofy-looking mouth-breathing flat heads: two-odd months to carry pups to term and another 8 weeks before they can leave their mum, by my reckoning that means offloading mongrels at Christmas - it would be quicker to just throw them into the river myself, so... no.
No, I'm afraid I'll have to risk the ire of the DUP* and take her to "visit her cousins in England", which is Irish doggy code for having a doggybortion.
One hundred and seventy facking quid, and I don't even know if the little slag is up the duff in the first place, so it's one hundred and seventy quid on a gamble.  Sure.  Why not?  I have that kind of money laying around.


* Doggy Unionist Party
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 31 August, 2018, 11:01:10 AM
You'll make someone a great pimp one day, Bear.


(Although it might be cheaper in the long run to neuter poor Dickhead while you're at it...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2018, 11:49:22 AM
Quote from: Professor Bear on 31 August, 2018, 10:53:02 AM

No, I'm afraid I'll have to risk the ire of the DUP* and take her to "visit her cousins in England", which is Irish doggy code for having a doggybortion.


Odd to think that the all-too-familar, south-of-the-border, human-equivalent euphemism 'hop on the boat' will never be used again.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 20 March, 2019, 10:02:51 PM
Whilst walking the dog not 20 minutes age, some lass accused me of touching her arm as I walked past her 20 minutes earlier. She was on the verge of tears while her boyfriend first threatened to call the police, then threaten to 'deck' me!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 22 March, 2019, 11:14:35 AM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 20 March, 2019, 10:02:51 PM
Whilst walking the dog not 20 minutes age, some lass accused me of touching her arm as I walked past her 20 minutes earlier. She was on the verge of tears while her boyfriend first threatened to call the police, then threaten to 'deck' me!!

Yeah, that's happened to me, once almost got battered after brushing past someone in a pub. Hope you managed to extricate yourself from the situation safely BSC.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 22 March, 2019, 05:50:36 PM
In my hometown local (years ago), the local lads would all sit in one corner, and their significant others would sit in another corner.  All the men in one corner, all the women in the other. They wouldn't communicate at all. (I have no idea where all the non hetero-normative folk were, but I can see how it would be difficult to choose a seat.) 

Then some innocent would wander in, start chatting to what seemed like a corner full of single people, at which point a "Are you trying to chat up my chattel?" style barny would ensue.

Humans: what a bunch of Scunthorpes.  (I was observing all of this from my domain behind the bar ... where the non-humans live.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2019, 11:23:22 PM
The local ne'er-do-wells  keep waving at me in the street when I wear a certain combination of baseball cap and jacket. They keep thinking I look like one of their mates.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 01 April, 2019, 11:38:02 PM
I just accidentally trod on a spider in the kitchen and squashed the poor thing flat.

I dunno why but it quite upset me. These accidental things *never* bother me normally.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: IAMTHESYSTEM on 02 April, 2019, 11:42:01 AM
You're the Terminator sent by time to save humanity from the Spider menace. The Spider's resistance Leader is dead so we salute you Tiplodocus! ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Fungus on 02 April, 2019, 01:44:00 PM
I'm looking at your avatar. 'Squashed the poor thing flat' was a given  :-\
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 02 April, 2019, 04:24:51 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2019, 11:23:22 PM
The local ne'er-do-wells  keep waving at me in the street when I wear a certain combination of baseball cap and jacket. They keep thinking I look like one of their mates.

that's not going to end well  :o
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 April, 2019, 05:14:22 PM

Show them the dead spider to let them know how you crush your enemies...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 02 April, 2019, 07:07:54 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 02 April, 2019, 04:24:51 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2019, 11:23:22 PM
The local ne'er-do-wells  keep waving at me in the street when I wear a certain combination of baseball cap and jacket. They keep thinking I look like one of their mates.

that's not going to end well  :o

The time to really worry, is when they start chanting "We will make you one of us... one of us..."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 02 April, 2019, 10:38:31 PM
Quote from: Proudhuff on 02 April, 2019, 04:24:51 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 22 March, 2019, 11:23:22 PM
The local ne'er-do-wells  keep waving at me in the street when I wear a certain combination of baseball cap and jacket. They keep thinking I look like one of their mates.

that's not going to end well  :o

I've already had one slightly uncomfortable conversation. They seem a bit surprised when a squeaky English voice answers them.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 03 June, 2019, 03:13:07 PM
Can't log into Comixology on my iPad without either updating the app (which I can't do) or linking my comixology and amazon accounts.

Pretty irked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 07 June, 2019, 01:54:43 PM
Quote from: I, Cosh on 03 June, 2019, 03:13:07 PM
linking my comixology and amazon accounts.


They do love encouraging that alright.
Whats the tin-foil theory on this? Can't see it making any difference myself.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 June, 2019, 06:31:26 PM

Part of the ongoing consolidation of the internet datascape.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 08 June, 2019, 09:19:46 AM
Quote from: Link Prime on 07 June, 2019, 01:54:43 PM
Quote from: I, Cosh on 03 June, 2019, 03:13:07 PM
linking my comixology and amazon accounts.
They do love encouraging that alright.
Whats the tin-foil theory on this? Can't see it making any difference myself.
Nothing really tin-foil. I just don't like this kind of convergence and as I try to keep the email addresses and such that I use for different things separate I get annoyed when one company manages to get around this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 June, 2019, 10:21:47 AM
F*CKING F*CKITY BANK F*CKERS F*CK. Come the revolution, I swear to Grud I know exactly where I'm leading my hand-picked Reconciliation Cadre to first, after we make a quick stop for re-education supplies at B&Q.

And that's all I have to say on that subject  :ssh:.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 June, 2019, 12:15:53 PM


Yikes!

Hope things turn out okay, Tordels.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 08 June, 2019, 02:15:54 PM
It is what it is, Sharkster. Nothing the overthrow of late capitalism and some duct tape couldn't fix.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 June, 2019, 02:43:08 PM

Aye, aye... I'm workin' on it...


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 11 June, 2019, 11:36:34 AM
Its the same in the Command Centre... read your Prog Damage Report for further info... over.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 August, 2019, 07:38:27 PM

Apparently, my heart's only working at about 50% capacity due to the damage it sustained during the last event. No wonder I'm struggling at work (had to get help carrying a storm-broken tree limb away today, should have been able to do it myself) and don't love anybody any more.

Feels like I'm on my way out.

Luckily, I'm too dumb/stubborn/romantic/awkward to lie down and quit. I mean, who the Hell's going to piss you lot off so adroitly if I kick the bucket, eh?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 12 August, 2019, 07:41:58 PM
Feck that Sharky, 50% output of your heart is probably better than the full function of most other folk's. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 August, 2019, 07:47:10 PM

Hell yeah! Thanks, Tordels - I'm gonna take that :D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bolt-01 on 13 August, 2019, 08:51:56 AM
Can you do anything to improve that percentage?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 13 August, 2019, 10:24:10 AM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 13 August, 2019, 08:51:56 AM
Can you do anything to improve that percentage?

Apparently, he can feast on the blood of the living, but they frown on that sort of thing these days.

(FWIW, Shark, my dad had a heart attack of a considerable magnitude with a similar result on heart function. He stopped smoking and reduced (but not to zero) his alcohol intake, added daily gentle exercise — nothing more strenuous than a briskish daily walk — and lasted for many more years. No idea if any of that is helpful, but is offered on the off-chance that it is.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 13 August, 2019, 10:55:05 AM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 13 August, 2019, 10:24:10 AM
Quote from: Bolt-01 on 13 August, 2019, 08:51:56 AM
Can you do anything to improve that percentage?

Apparently, he can feast on the blood of the living, but they frown on that sort of thing these days.


As a comic book reader I always had Sharky pinned as more of an energy vampire.


In all seriousness Sharks, take on Jims advice, maybe see a cardio specialist as well, take it easy bud.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: shaolin_monkey on 13 August, 2019, 12:18:25 PM
Hang in there Sharky.  Good advice above from Jim re exercise, diet and alchohol - advice I'm going to have to take myself. As my dad told me when I hit 40, "It's all downhill from there."

He wasn't wrong - I've suffered kidney stones, an enlarged prostate, and had several surgeries to get shitloads of lumps taken out of my arms. 

Add to that my eyesight deteriorating at a rate of knots, my short term memory getting measurably more patchy, and today moved up to a stronger inhaler 'cos my asthma has gone through the roof this year, AND being told I need to lose weight/exercise more to get my high blood pressure down.

Plus the usual gripes - aches, pains, a back I can't trust to lift things any more blah blah blah blah.

Bloody human body.  It sucks. I just want a chrome number like Axel Pressbutton (especially the button!) and I'll be sorted.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 13 August, 2019, 02:36:42 PM
Take care Sharky. See the quacks and find out what you can do. The body is a tough thing and a few changes may improve things.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 13 August, 2019, 07:46:42 PM

Thanks, all.

I have quite a physical job, working outside, gardening, fixer-uppering and whatnot, so I'm getting plenty of fresh air and varied exercise. I'm definitely not as strong as I used to be but I'm stronger than I was six months ago. This 50% thing might well be old data - it's annoying, the things I forget to ask.

Of course, the doctors' solution is pharmaceuticals. Ramipril. Stops the heart swelling up as it tries to increase its capacity (you what?), it might melt your kidneys (you fucking what??) but don't worry, because if it does we have a tablet for that, too (oh for...).

I still can't believe I saved up to buy a bloody yearly prescription to this crap. I didn't use any of it last time, save for the aspirin and fish oil, and I felt better quicker. But then it happens again and this time I'm doing it their way (got to give the buggers a chance, right?) and it's taking forever. Is it because this was a more serious thing or because of all these drugs in my system? Maybe it's all in my mind. I have no idea.

Anyhoo, I'm aiming to be around for a lot longer, yet, whichever way I go. That said, I know the only certainty about my future is that it ends - the ultimate minor impediment. Might be another century from now, might be tomorrow. I don't want to die, I'm even a little afraid of it (in the same way that I'm a little afraid of the sea, that time when you come face to face with its Power; a sudden wave on the beach that lifts you off your feet or hanging onto something when your boat lurches like crazy), but one day it will be in front of me, like the first day at school, the first sexual encounter, the first parachute jump - that kind of fear. The kind of fear that tends to have exhilaration on the other side - but might not. So I'd like to put it off for as long as possible but, if I can't, say lavvie.  Because I'll be cacking myself, hoping that my parachute's going to open...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 04 September, 2020, 09:04:24 PM
So I'm looking for my glasses this morning. There is a cracking sound beneath my knee on the bed.

I have just found my glasses.

With my knee.

I throw out a silent, fleeting plea to Karma: Please let my glasses be okay!

When I lift up my knee, I discover that one of the lenses has come completely free from the frame.

Bugger! (And, not for the first time:"Screw you, Karma!)

So after much scrambling around to find some old pair that will at least get me through for a day or two - that and a case to fit them into - off I went to Specsavers (from whence I had originally bought said lenses) in the hope they could repair them.

And what do ya think happened?

I brought an entirely wrong pair of old and utterly useless glasses with me instead )albeit both lenses were still intact in their lenses).

And to cap it all off, this week's Tooth had not yet arrived in my regular vendor's store.

Oh, the Humanity of it all!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 04 September, 2020, 09:13:58 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 04 September, 2020, 09:04:24 PM
So I'm looking for my glasses this morning. There is a cracking sound beneath my knee on the bed.

I have just found my glasses.

With my knee.

I throw out a silent, fleeting plea to Karma: Please let my glasses be okay!

When I lift up my knee, I discover that one of the lenses has come completely free from the frame.

Bugger! (And, not for the first time:"Screw you, Karma!)

So after much scrambling around to find some old pair that will at least get me through for a day or two - that and a case to fit them into - off I went to Specsavers (from whence I had originally bought said lenses) in the hope they could repair them.

And what do ya think happened?

I brought an entirely wrong pair of old and utterly useless glasses with me instead )albeit both lenses were still intact in their lenses).

And to cap it all off, this week's Tooth had not yet arrived in my regular vendor's store.

Oh, the Humanity of it all!
*checks paper for news of a murder spree involving a pair of glasses and startled newsagents.*
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 05 September, 2020, 12:35:19 PM
Which makes me think of my own minor impediment - age has caught up with my once-perfect eyesight, and now I can't read, or more importantly do the Viz crossword, without glasses. Fortunately the pound-shop ones work for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 05 September, 2020, 05:14:15 PM
Would really not advise that long terms, Jayzus. Better off going to a specialist. (Hopefully not being personal - and apologies if I am - but if you have a medical card then you can get a pretty good deal with some of them. I already mentioned Specsavers as where I go to, but I'm sure there are other options too.)

I know it's a pain, but do you really want to end up like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHLbwwqCY9o

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 September, 2020, 08:11:57 PM
My brother owns about thirty pairs of poundshop specs of varying strengths and can never find one that is perfect.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 28 September, 2020, 12:38:00 AM
I've been on Furlough leave from work, and I found out recently that they won't be extending my contract. I'm not really surprised. Business is down, and they're largely able to absorb my work at the moment although there's a good chance I'll be back next week -working from home- so the last month of my contract I could well be working.

A short while before this, we were informed that certain people in the company would be up for redundancy. We were understandably worried, but then it turned out it wouldn't affect our particular team. I felt somewhat relieved at the time. Then it occurred to me that as I'm technically a temp (albeit one who will have been with the company for two years when my contract ends, albeit six months of that was Furlough*) they might just not extend my contract... and my guess turned out to be true.

There are three new posts that will be available soon and there's a possibility I might be back -this time in a permanent *cough* position, but those in the current redundancy pools get first dibs. It's understandable, but kinda ironic when you consider my initial relief that redundancies would pass me by.

Anyway, it's not over yet. There's a chance to return, (the current redundancies did different work so might not be keen on our team's posts)  and there's the  possibility of other positions elsewhere in the company. And if I do leave them for good, others have had it far worse during this epidemic. I'm really not looking forward to the job hunt though.

*the management have tried to change my contract to a permanent position, but it never occurred. My initial employment was due to the company warehouse burning down so a 'Fire Budget' was set aside for new temps to help the order team catch up. Then after that work increased so my temp contract was extended again and again, and I guess they kept me as a temp as it was cheaper to pay me from the fire budget. If Covid hadn't occurred they probably would have been offered me a permanent position eventually though. They seemed to be very happy with me, but ... should've... could've... would've... it's all academic now init. Damned Covid.  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 28 September, 2020, 03:44:39 AM
Sorry to hear that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 28 September, 2020, 03:31:36 PM
Hope it works out in the end, Mandroid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 September, 2020, 06:09:20 PM
Sorry to hear about that Mardroid, and I hope your fortunes change.

It's unfortunately safe to say you won't be the only one on the board affected by the pandemic / recession fallout in the next 12 - 24 months.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 01 October, 2020, 04:42:04 PM
Thanks guys. Much appreciated.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Colin YNWA on 01 October, 2020, 04:45:29 PM
That's pretty damned sucky Mardroid, but glad to see you are chipper enough to put it in the 'minor impediment' bit.

are you in a field that currently has options? Either way good luck with the hunt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Mardroid on 01 October, 2020, 11:34:44 PM
Mainly data entry/admin work, so not too bad I guess. Also I've done quite a bit of warehouse work, but I think I'll avoid that if I can. 😁 I'm not best suited to it...but there seems a lot more if it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Doctor Alt 8 on 31 October, 2020, 04:28:01 AM
I love my cat Dorian but since I moved my PC to the only place in the house that can pick up an internet signal he has not developed the habit of sitting on top of the tower. This wouldn't be QUITE so bad but the little devil accidently keeps turning it off in inopportune times... usually when I am gaming ... I don't know how to stop the furry fiend!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 23 November, 2020, 12:14:14 AM
This is only a minor impediment, as per the thread demands, and really I dont mind, but...

I've just spent the best part of six hours trying to pull fifteen hundred consecutive words- that make sense- out of my arse, on the subject of phylogenetic modelling, behavioural ecology and nonhuman primate modelling, with particular reference to A. robustus and H. erectus.

As I say, I don't mind too much as I wanted to do this course in the first place, I have loved every second (except the last six hours) and I have learned more than I ever thought possible for a fifty year old man with the approximate cranial capacity of a K. platyops. That's a self-deprecating anthropology joke, because after six hours that's all I can manage.

What really brings this into the realm of "minor impediments" is that I had the tv on throughout, muted. I closed my laptop, sat back, took a drag of my vape, enjoyed a minute of silent empty headedness, and Unmuted the telly.

...To hear David Attenbrough talking about exactly what I had been writing about, and hopelessly stuck on, two hours ago- and which had nearly driven me to bash my head against the wall and cry, until I finally worked it out.

It's now just after midnight. I can afford to sleep and have time to edit tomorrow, before submitting my writing in the evening. So while i appreciate the help, Sir David, you could have orchestrated it so you were on a few hours earlier, and I might have been able to spend a bit of time with that book I now won't get to read before Tuesday.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 23 November, 2020, 12:29:33 AM
 :lol: :lol:

Reminds me of when I was on holiday in Croatia years ago with my (sadly departed) best mate, and we were in the hotel drinking and got to wondering as to how the feck concrete was made.  It being pre-internet-on-demand-times, we realised neither of us had a clue, switched on the telly, flicked through the channels, and found a documentary - on an English speaking channel - about how concrete was made.

A better outcome for us than for you, I'll grant you.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 23 November, 2020, 08:28:27 AM
Brilliant story, SBT!  But I can guarantee you'll remember all that far better than if you'd received it straight from the lips of the divine Dave in the first place.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 28 January, 2021, 05:25:20 PM
Brexit finally becomes more than a LOL situation - l just received an email from Forbidden Planet UK - international shipping has ceased, and they "hope" to fulfill my existing pre-orders.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Smith on 28 January, 2021, 06:24:05 PM
Well I wanted to replay C&C 3 Tiberium Wars,but the later patches overnerfed everything and the campaign is basically unwinnable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rara Avis on 28 January, 2021, 07:24:12 PM
Heating broke in the house in October and wasn't fixed until December and then only partially (some of the radiators worked but not all of them) - has been totally fixed now but we've just received the highest bill ever for the period from December to January. Have been trying to explain to the water company that something's not right and been told

a) Your bill is around the same as it was last year (yeah but last year our heating worked for that entire period)
b) It's been colder so you probably had the heating on more (yeah i know it's been cold because I haven't had any heat in my living room, where I am working from, from Oct to Jan.
c) Oh you know you're being charged for your hot water usage too (oh you mean like I have for every other month for the eight years I've lived here, yeah thanks I know about the hot water charge).

<deep sigh>
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 18 April, 2021, 08:07:37 AM
Well, after an 'interesting' year of shifting back and forth between face-to-face and virtual teaching, having to completely repurpose materials to both situations due to timetable decisions that basically meant 100 minute rather than 60 minute lessons with mixed ability form 'bubbles' rather than sets, and a set of assessment requirements so obscure that Stephen Hawkins would have balked at them (whilst trying to manage the impact of one colleague's behaviour on my BPD)

... anyway, on top of all this, the head announces this week that they need to make one of us redundant because of the funding impact of the loss of the school 6th form (a process that was completed last year after 5 years).  Possibly we might all have been a little less put out by the announcement if she hadn't given someone a permanent contract last summer knowing full well this was coming.

Now I know that this is a situation that several million people across the country have become familiar with this year.  So its nice to know that even so called 'secure' jobs in core subjects at secondary can share the experience.  Just hoping that I can leverage my skill set into new, gainful employment at this ripe old age in a time of escalating unemployment.

Oh, why 'minor impediment'?  Well, arguably there are people in a far worse position than myself.   :|

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 April, 2021, 10:19:12 AM

A guy I know is making a few bob tutoring at home, one student at a time.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 18 April, 2021, 03:10:51 PM
Rough situation Tjm, and you're taking the right attitude to it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 05 May, 2021, 09:47:53 PM
Summary: in a sort of intellectual equivalent of herpes, a "man" pretends to be baffled that trolling the living shit out of people annoys them.

(https://i.imgur.com/ViBfW3L.png)


See also: Noober from Baldur's Gate (https://youtu.be/DOrZNafVpxw)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 06 May, 2021, 01:19:46 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo on 05 May, 2021, 09:47:53 PM
Summary: in a sort of intellectual equivalent of herpes, a "man" pretends to be baffled that trolling the living shit out of people annoys them.

(https://i.imgur.com/ViBfW3L.png)


See also: Noober from Baldur's Gate (https://youtu.be/DOrZNafVpxw)

Jeebus Crisps, does he even know what humour is?
Not even a fan of Mrs Br*wn's B*ys would find this funny :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 06 May, 2021, 03:21:48 PM
Turns out I'm the bigger idiot - I rattled the narcissist's cage and now he's stalking me IRL.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Woolly on 06 May, 2021, 04:09:54 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo on 06 May, 2021, 03:21:48 PM
Turns out I'm the bigger idiot - I rattled the narcissist's cage and now he's stalking me IRL.

You must have struck a nerve then :thumbsup:
Either that, or he's making another attempt at a "comedy" video...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 May, 2021, 05:44:19 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo on 06 May, 2021, 03:21:48 PM
Turns out I'm the bigger idiot - I rattled the narcissist's cage and now he's stalking me IRL.

A man who thinks it's funny to call routinely people paedophiles on public forums turns out to be deeply creepy, sad little man? I'm shocked by this development. Shocked, tell you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 06 May, 2021, 06:51:50 PM
I have scarcely a clue who or what you're all talking about.  Probably for the best.

Me, my front motorbike brake jammed last Tuesday while I was on my way to the mechanic's to get the front brake of my motorbike fixed.  Now I'm hobbling about with a stick and have a bruise that looks like the spot on Jupiter.  And plenty of other scrapes and bruises to add to it.  And an extra 350 nicker to pay out to the mechanic.

But, to be fair, I was very lucky.  No bones broken, and my neighbour who drives a van happened to drive past very soon after the accident and brought both me and the bike home.  He patched me up and took the bike to the mechanic's.  The man's a fecking saint - he's the same lad whose garden I watched the Wicker Man in last weekend, if anyone follows the Last Movie Watched thread.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 06 May, 2021, 06:53:35 PM
Crikey, JBC. Hope you mend soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 06 May, 2021, 06:53:45 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 06 May, 2021, 06:51:50 PM
But, to be fair, I was very lucky.  No bones broken, and my neighbour who drives a van happened to drive past very soon after the accident and brought both me and the bike home.  He patched me up and took the bike to the mechanic's.

...and then you went to the hospital?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 06 May, 2021, 07:00:37 PM
Ah, feck that, Jayzus! I hope that you'll recover soon. And well done on your neighbour for helping out, too.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 06 May, 2021, 07:13:31 PM
Welcome to the hobbling club!

Look after yourself and hope you've not done yourself a serious injury.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Bad City Blue on 06 May, 2021, 07:22:19 PM


Do you have a screen shot of that?


Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 06 May, 2021, 05:44:19 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo on 06 May, 2021, 03:21:48 PM
Turns out I'm the bigger idiot - I rattled the narcissist's cage and now he's stalking me IRL.

A man who thinks it's funny to call routinely people paedophiles on public forums turns out to be deeply creepy, sad little man? I'm shocked by this development. Shocked, tell you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 May, 2021, 08:02:01 PM
Quote from: Bad City Blue on 06 May, 2021, 07:22:19 PM
Do you have a screen shot of that?

I have a screenshot of the time (or the time that I'm aware of) that he did it to me, yes. But he, and the jolly little crew he hangs out with, do it all the time. They think it's 'edgy' and 'darkly humorous' to compare people to Jimmy Savile or imply they should be on a sex offenders register. It's not.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 06 May, 2021, 08:20:12 PM

Cripes, JBC - I'm glad to hear you're not badly hurt and hope you heal up pdq.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 May, 2021, 10:41:13 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 06 May, 2021, 06:53:45 PM
...and then you went to the hospital?

I think that would be a very good idea. Wishing you the fullest and speediest of recoveries, JBC.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 06 May, 2021, 11:00:08 PM
Thanks, all!

I didn't go to the hospital I'm afraid, I said I'd give it a night and see how well I was doing in the morning. I did feel a bit better then and now I feel I could probably function without the stick - it's nice to have it though when things get a bit twinge.  But the twinginess is far less frequent than it was.

So I think I've been very lucky and avoided serious damage. Again, really appreciate your good wishes.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 06 May, 2021, 11:07:34 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 06 May, 2021, 11:00:08 PM
So I think I've been very lucky and avoided serious damage. Again, really appreciate your good wishes.

Good news, sir. Best wishes for a continued recovery.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 06 May, 2021, 11:29:05 PM
Thanks Jim, appreciate it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 07 May, 2021, 10:35:06 AM
Glad to hear you're still with us JBC - sounds like a close one.


And a virtual hug for all those middle aged men continuing the eternal struggle against their Twitter enemies.
You gots this, dawg.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 07 May, 2021, 11:13:09 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 06 May, 2021, 06:51:50 PM
Me, my front motorbike brake jammed last Tuesday while I was on my way to the mechanic's to get the front brake of my motorbike fixed.  Now I'm hobbling about with a stick and have a bruise that looks like the spot on Jupiter. 

Jayzis, Jayzus!  Mind yourself there our lad. Great to hear stories of good neighbours,  though.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 May, 2021, 07:28:56 AM

Sitting in the Sharkshed having a brew and mourning the saddest of yesterdays before going out to work. It's properly lashing it down outside and I've got toothache.

Gah.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: milstar on 08 May, 2021, 09:11:59 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 08 May, 2021, 07:28:56 AM

Sitting in the Sharkshed having a brew and mourning the saddest of yesterdays before going out to work. It's properly lashing it down outside and I've got toothache.

Gah.



Tootache is a real bitch. I used to pull a tooth out when I was a kid by tying the tooth with a thread on one end, then wrap the other end on a doorknob. So when someone opens it...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 08 May, 2021, 10:23:15 AM
Quote from: milstar on 08 May, 2021, 09:11:59 AM
Tootache is a real bitch. I used to pull a tooth out when I was a kid by tying the tooth with a thread on one end, then wrap the other end on a doorknob. So when someone opens it...

Heeey - didn't that only happen in cartoons?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: milstar on 08 May, 2021, 11:02:57 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 08 May, 2021, 10:23:15 AM
Quote from: milstar on 08 May, 2021, 09:11:59 AM
Tootache is a real bitch. I used to pull a tooth out when I was a kid by tying the tooth with a thread on one end, then wrap the other end on a doorknob. So when someone opens it...

Heeey - didn't that only happen in cartoons?

Where do you think cartoons took inspiration from?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 May, 2021, 12:15:41 PM

I used to work with a bloke whose dad was in the Marines and eschewed the dentist. Having seen it done "in the field," the dad took a pair of long-nosed pliers and attempted to take his own tooth out. In the end, of course, he had to go to the dentist anyway to dig out all the broken shards he'd left behind. Worse, he'd been worrying at the wrong tooth.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 08 May, 2021, 01:41:26 PM
To this day, I still have to turn away from watching "The Marathon Man" when Laurence Olivier - as the evil Nazi dentist, Zell - gives Dustin Hoffman an oral check-up.

"Is it safe?"

Shudder...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: DrJomster on 08 May, 2021, 01:57:24 PM
My dad was a dentist and that was his least favourite film! Ever.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: milstar on 08 May, 2021, 01:59:52 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 08 May, 2021, 01:41:26 PM
To this day, I still have to turn away from watching "The Marathon Man" when Laurence Olivier - as the evil Nazi dentist, Zell - gives Dustin Hoffman an oral check-up.

"Is it safe?"

Shudder...

Ugh. Don't mention it. I am always reminded why I hate to go to the dentist. Although I learned from that movie that oil of cloves can fix your toothache (albeit temporarily).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 May, 2021, 02:36:18 PM

Was it American History X that introduced me to the charming idea of biting a kerb while somebody stomps on the back of the victim's head? >shudder<

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 08 May, 2021, 02:58:39 PM
I would be a bit wary of anyone who was familiar with that procedure before seeing that movie. I wonder if they do it in any of the nine prequels...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 08 May, 2021, 04:06:19 PM
Quote from: TordelBack on 07 May, 2021, 11:13:09 PM
Jayzis, Jayzus!  Mind yourself there our lad. Great to hear stories of good neighbours,  though.

Cheers TB!  Very much on the mend now.  My bruise looks more like a minor planetoid now.

Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 08 May, 2021, 07:28:56 AM

Sitting in the Sharkshed having a brew and mourning the saddest of yesterdays before going out to work. It's properly lashing it down outside and I've got toothache.

Gah.



I know a chap who can help you out.  Sidney something-or-other.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 08 May, 2021, 04:50:13 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 08 May, 2021, 02:36:18 PM

Was it American History X that introduced me to the charming idea of biting a kerb while somebody stomps on the back of the victim's head? >shudder<
One of the most horrifying scenes in all of cinema. >shudder indeed<
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 05 June, 2021, 06:15:50 AM
The house alarm in the neighbouring apartment enters its 24th hour of Bank Holiday Weekend gone-home-to-Donegal unattended fun. No-one has a key, contact number isn't working, management company's "emergency desk" can't even remember the name of the estate between calls, so I'm not expecting miracles.

When I am Supreme Leader any property with an alarm that rings for more than 1 hour  will be declared abandoned and opened to the pleasure of (a) the homeless and (b) an angry, tired fat man with earplugs and an axe.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 05 June, 2021, 06:24:55 AM
(https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FarFavoriteConey-max-1mb.gif)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 05 June, 2021, 12:54:45 PM
Oh dear, Tordelback! Having been in your situation many times before, I feel your pain on that score. (On one occasion, the disturbance lasted the entire three days and nights of a Bank Holiday.  >:( )

IMHO, house alarms are an absolute scourge on society. Regardless of whatever draconian and deranged legislation your Autocratic Highness might enact in the future, you would get my vote for Supreme Leader if your first act in power was to ban the use of those noise sirens.

Hope that you won't have to undergo the disturbance for much longer.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: TordelBack on 06 June, 2021, 07:51:07 AM
Cheers, Paddy.

And yet,  Hour 50 approaches. I wonder if any of our baton-happy Gardaí would take time off from bating youths to address this ongoing disturbance. To act, as it were, as guardians of the peace.

Despite a mountain of uncompleted work, Bank Holiday crowds filling the hills with badly parked cars, and a pair of headphones now permanently welded to my head, I'm going Out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 06 June, 2021, 12:43:50 PM
Well, if the alarm keeps going and everybody's just trying to ignore it, that's basically an invitation to go in and help yourself to their TV or whatever?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 06 June, 2021, 03:55:47 PM
Ah, that's shit Tordelback. Had a similar thing with a car alarm outside our living room window years ago. Passing coppers just shrugged their shoulders and the battery wouldn't die. By the end, neighborhood youths were taking flying kicks at it while I applauded from my balcony but it didn't really help.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 07 June, 2021, 09:53:37 AM
Quote from: Mister Pops on 06 June, 2021, 12:43:50 PM
Well, if the alarm keeps going and everybody's just trying to ignore it, that's basically an invitation to go in and help yourself to their TV or whatever?

Spot on, if there's no response then surely it's house-robbing time!
Please tell us it's no longer going off.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 07 June, 2021, 11:10:46 AM
No idea what the deal is with house alarms, but for cars there are circumstances in which the council can try to disable the alarm, including breaking windows to force entry.
QuoteWhat will the Council do to deal with a noisy car?
If an alarm is reported and has been sounding for some time, then investigations will be made to try and trace the owner.

If this fails, or the owner is not contactable, then legal action is likely to be taken.  This involves serving a notice on the vehicle, and if the alarm is not silenced (normally within an hour), then the Council will arrange for the vehicle to be entered and the alarm disconnected.  If this is not possible the vehicle can be towed away to a suitable place in order to silence the alarm

The registered owner of the vehicle will be informed of the action taken and will be charged the costs incurred.

Who has to pay if a car alarm has to be silenced?
The Council has the powers to recover any costs from the owner or the keeper of the vehicle involved.  The costs incurred may include having to forcibly enter the vehicle, or remove it to a suitable place in order to silence the alarm.

Ah-hah!  For the UK at least (Northampton in particular, but I imagine the same applies to other boroughs) noise pollution - burglar alarms (https://www.northampton.gov.uk/info/200075/pollution/1094/noise_pollution-burglar_alarms)

QuoteEnsure that your alarm is fitted with a cut-off device to deactivate the siren or bell after 20 minutes.
Ensure that at least one of your nominated key holders can respond within 20 minutes of being called out.
What happens when the Council gets involved when an alarm causes a statutory nuisance?
Once the Police are satisfied that there is no criminal activity taking place at the premises, and the Council is satisfied that the noise of the alarm is causing a statutory nuisance, then a legal notice will be served requiring the alarm to be silenced - normally within a short period of time.  If this is not complied with then an application will be made to the Duty Magistrate for a warrant to enter the premises.

The Council will engage the services of a locksmith and an electrician, and they will obtain access to the premises and disconnect the alarm.  The Council will ensure that upon leaving, the premises is left in a secure condition.  This whole process may take several hours.

Who has to pay if an alarm has to be disconnected?
The costs incurred by the council during this process will be recharged to the occupier of the premises.  This can be expensive and will include the Council's costs, the costs of the locksmith and the electrician.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 07 June, 2021, 05:00:01 PM
If I ruled the World, the offending occupier / owner responsible for the noise, would be made to do a Walk-of-Shame around the immediate neighbourhood.

All attending spectators would be given a little bell to ring against the ears of the deviant.

Give the 'effer a taste of their own medicine, as it were...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 08 June, 2021, 08:52:53 AM
QuoteShame!  Shame!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 08 June, 2021, 02:32:01 PM
I did see a Policeman deal with one of these very efficiently with a sweeping brush and a few hefty swipes, to much cheering from the surrounding houses
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 19 June, 2021, 11:53:30 AM
I have to isolate for 6 days. Bugger and arse.
Have been doing rapid antigen tests each day for weeks and feel absolutely fine, so I doubt I've been infected (first shot puts me somewhat more at ease too I might add) and am more frustrated its happened just as the gears of real life where beginning to turn once again.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 June, 2021, 07:32:55 PM
Only 6 days? I'm part way through a 10 day isolation - my flat mate (a one-jabber) has come down with it. Felt a bit rough, runny nose, sore throat so went down the test centre and he's positive. He's fine, but we can't even go to the shops till Wednesday. Been self-testing every other day (it's too horrible to do daily) and so far my double-jab is winning the germ-war. Did my first online grocery shop and got a bit carried away, so I could withstand a siege. And an enforced 10 days of no work, comics, weed and netflix ain't too bad.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 19 June, 2021, 08:29:42 PM
Indeed the pacing of the isolation seems very arbitrary, I have a coworker who was isolating for 4 days as if that's going to make any difference. Glad you're making it thought DDD, a day later i'm alright. Annoying as it is I get paid for any shifts missed and I can write and drink and smoke pot for most of that time so it'll do.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: milstar on 08 July, 2021, 11:04:52 AM
I took my first shot of vaccine today. Figured the time is ripe. I had Moderna, which is fine, although I considered Pfizer (AZ no chance). Unfortunately, not all have been that lucky. My Mom who got AZ shot months ago is left empty-handed for the second jab. "Lack of supplies" , sort to speak of. When the new batch of vaccines will arrive, no one knows.

But what worries me here, is the virus so far corroborated ability to mutate. Can't help but  to wonder whether every country in the world will have their own version of covid.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 July, 2021, 11:45:05 AM

Viruses mutate all the time, an ongoing process which is just as likely to develop less dangerous variants.

So it's not all doom and gloom.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 July, 2021, 01:10:48 PM
Anyone who was paying attention and/or in a vulnerable subsect of society during the AIDs epidemic, Sharky, will attest its really not quiet that simple when it comes to immunodeficiency retrovirus'.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 July, 2021, 03:49:44 PM

No comment.

Backing away from the subject.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 20 September, 2021, 04:49:28 AM
Paid man to clean the gutters, because of my dodgy knee. He washed a blockage further into the downspout and I found it the other night when it was overflowing through the top of the basement door. So I created a catcher bucket out of a rubbish bin and an old length of hose, then dismantled the downspout in the darkness and the downpour, accidentally didn't break any of the things I dropped and with the help of a new neighbor managed to rebuild everything and drip off to bed.

This maybe belongs in the good news thread - all's well that ends well!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 September, 2021, 07:47:40 AM

That new neighbour sounds like a keeper - first helping you with your overflowing spout in the dark and then into bed...

I have a dodgy elbow, which I broke when I was about eight or nine and is always now stiff and sore. Yesterday I was fixing our beehive and a bee stung me on this very elbow. Once the pain of the sting wore off, the stiffness and soreness of my mangled joint went away, at least for the time being. Result!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 20 September, 2021, 10:20:48 AM
Is this an example of "Men Beehiving Badly"?  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 September, 2021, 10:29:26 AM

Given my advancing years, it's more like Men Beehiving Baldly.

I'll get our coats...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 September, 2021, 11:05:04 AM
I've only just come to appreciate how dependent on our phones we have become when mine refused to charge last week and died.

Tried to use my laptop to log into various websites - work systems, and also my bank to move some money ... "we have sent a security code to your phone..." AAAARGH!! I also had to borrow an alarm clock as I use my phone for that. I was expecting some deliveries on Sunday, almost missed them as I was unable to receive any of the texts and phonecalls telling me that they're on their way.

Took it to the shop as I'm overdue an upgrade but they couldn't do anything as I couldn't remember my apple password. Went back with that and am picking up a new phone tonight, but it's been a hassle of a weekend.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 20 September, 2021, 11:28:02 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 September, 2021, 10:29:26 AM

Given my advancing years, it's more like Men Beehiving Baldly.

I'll get our coats...

You might want a hat too ... it's getting a bit nippy now ...  ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: milstar on 21 September, 2021, 07:14:38 PM
When you do not own anything bigger than your shabby apartment, yet you receive dozen phone calls because a newspaper gave an ad in which you are looking for a bartender for your own restaurant. I wish very soon to wake up tomorrow.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 08 October, 2021, 02:48:13 PM
Not often I'd describe redundancy as a 'minor impediment' but as I decided to resign from my management role of a indie picture house after just one month it really was the best option for me. I put a not inconsiderable amount of work into attempting to sustain the venture under great pressures, as well as make the preparations and research required to advance the brand to the next stage of its development, efforts for which where promptly shot down, all while dealing with some frequently toxic circumstances.
Things came to ahead last weekend when I realized I was effectively a manager without agency or authority, and was mostly being used as a front and fall guy for the owner, and decided the time to move on was right. Its infuriating that a dream job in a field you adore opens up but proves unviable due to clashing philosophies on how to handle the business.

I hope I can eventually settle into the same role elsewhere, as I was good at it  and enjoyed it greatly, in spite of the hinderances.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 08 October, 2021, 04:58:17 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 08 October, 2021, 02:48:13 PM
...I was effectively a manager without agency or authority, and was mostly being used as a front and fall guy for the owner...

This was my experience as a pub manager, and I suspect it's the same for most managers in small businesses, you're just a glorified key-holder, all responsibility and no power.

At least you might be able to avoid Marvel movies for a while.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 11 October, 2021, 05:09:23 PM
Glad to know its a universal nuisance. Anyway, already landed a new job at the same rate of pay so my anxiety over having to cancel the move has pretty much been averted.

Peaks and valleys and all that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2021, 01:49:16 PM
Nothing to compete with exploding boats, redundancy or depression, but this last couple of weeks has just been one annoying shitshow after another.

First my phone just died - could not get a charge in. No problem, I thought, everything I do on my phone I can do on my laptop. Until I tried logging into my bank, work systems, Amazon etc ... "We have sent a code to your phone...." This was also the day when I was getting a new cooker delivered between 7am and 7pm .. "we will text you an ETA and call when we're on our way...."

Got a new phone, and headed to the cashpoint. Got so distracted taking down the details of a free draw advertised on the screen, I walked away without taking my cash - somebody got an early £200 Christmas present. As I'd drawn my limit, had to wait to next day to get some cash. Cashpoint crashed and shut down halfway through, stealing my card. My new card should have been here in 3-5 working days - today is day 8 since I reported it. I've had to get time off work this afternoon to visit the branch in the City Centre as I'm skint and the fridge is empty.

And today, I turned up to work to find I'd lost my pass and they wouldn't let me in the building (I've worked there for 20 years). Took a while to sort out - had to call my manager at home, who logged the request and texted me the reference so they could issue a new one - all time that I will have to make up later.

All minor niggles, but taken together this month does seem to have it in for me.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 21 October, 2021, 02:30:38 PM
Yeah a mislaid wallet and phone, at slightly different times, makes me feel your pain, good luck getting back on track!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2021, 03:02:14 PM

Jeez, DDD - Kafka would be proud.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 October, 2021, 03:48:31 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 21 October, 2021, 03:02:14 PM

Jeez, DDD - Kafka would be proud.

I presume it's that imposter Franz fella you're talking about and not the real Kafka?  :)

But ah, that sucks, DDD. Sorry for your troubles and here's hoping that Fortuna goes into upswing mode for you soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 21 October, 2021, 04:30:30 PM
My Grud, that is something of a clesterfeck.  Hope things pick up for you.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2021, 06:15:49 PM
coming from someone whose home just exploded around them, I feel pretty lucky, but cheers!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 21 October, 2021, 06:52:28 PM
Something like that could be the backstory for a super-villain like Doctor Doom. He was a nice, quiet, considered man - an accountant - until his 'phone broke, his bank-card was eaten and some security jobs-worth wouldn't let him into the office he'd been going to for twenty years ... then something inside him SNAPPED!!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2021, 07:58:01 PM
Damn right it did. I left my cups on the counter instead of the dishwasher at work (HA!) and wrote a strongly worded web message to my bank (BOOM!)

I scare myself sometimes
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 21 October, 2021, 08:45:06 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 21 October, 2021, 01:49:16 PM
Nothing to compete with exploding boats, redundancy or depression, but this last couple of weeks has just been one annoying shitshow after another.

Christ DDD, truly a matryoshka doll of misfortune. Hoping you can get the stuff that NEEDS resolving sorted asap, and the stuff that can't be helped doesn't smart for too long.
Some weeks really do feel stacked to just test our limitations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 22 October, 2021, 11:00:39 AM
I received a series of emails from the property land owner, mortgage lender, and surveyor of the apartment I'm supposed to be moving into in the new year.

It would seem the solicitor I chose to deal with these transactions just hasn't been doing their job.
Profoundly aggravating when you have to run around cleaning up the mess of someone you employed based on their qualifications at no small amount of pocket change.
I don't know about stepping further up the property ladder but if the first rung is the LEAST stressful, I think I'll be content with my little flat for the next 60 years.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 October, 2021, 01:54:23 PM
The move may have been delayed. Again. COVID once again sending enough of the building team home to close the site until further notice.

I know this is incredibly petty considering how lucky I am in a cosmic sense, I have a roof over my head and food on the table right now. It just smarts a bit. I already chalked up the money and my apartment IS done, obviously though its still a building site elsewhere and health and safety blah blah...

Would have been nice to be in for Q4 '21 but Q2 '22 is looking more likely.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 19 November, 2021, 06:26:13 PM
Gotta love it when the bank mortgage team requires you to submit in a designated online portal and the document attachment widget doesn't work. Accepts the typical variation of files up to 5MB, so a 48KB PDF should be a doddle right? Wrong.

So i'mma have to drop in and hand them in in person and uuurrrggghhhh.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 November, 2021, 07:59:02 PM
Brace yourself Hawk, there's a non-zero chance the staff at the local branch will get a bit pissy that they have to deal with your paperwork and you didn't just do it online.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 19 November, 2021, 08:35:54 PM
Oh absolutely, but theres little option. The lending agreement document I had to sign was uploaded no problem, just the proof of identity and wages PDFs where being daft buggers.
Lad I spoke to on the phone was nice enough so fingers crossed it will be painless....
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 19 November, 2021, 09:34:57 PM
They're just fobbing you off while they finish building it  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 20 November, 2021, 03:45:32 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 19 November, 2021, 09:34:57 PM
They're just fobbing you off while they start building it  :lol:

FTFY
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 24 November, 2021, 04:11:38 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 19 November, 2021, 06:26:13 PM
Accepts the typical variation of files up to 5MB, so a 48KB PDF should be a doddle right? Wrong.

uuurrrggghhhh.

Every Forumite who ever tried to attach a Pic.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 December, 2021, 03:59:38 PM

My left Achilles tendon has been giving me the gyp for about two months now, so I've been limping around the place like an eldster. A month ago, I pulled something in my left shoulder, so I've been dithering around the place like a seasoned eldster.

Today I was endeavouring to tie up a massive rose bush that's trying to block the driveway. On the final heave, the rope snapped and I fell, no, plummeted to the ground. Right on top of a rockery. One rock thumped my right thigh, dead-legging me. A second rock kissed my right elbow, dead-arming me. As I lay gasping, the wheelbarrow fell on top of me, casting its load of thorny rose branches as a ready-made tangle onto my chest and face. When my workmate, Michel, had stopped laughing and helped me up he discovered that the rockery contained an enormous dog turd, half of which was now stuck to my back and head.

My every limb is now sore and throbbing - but at least there is symmetry.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 14 December, 2021, 04:33:21 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 December, 2021, 03:59:38 PM

Today I was endeavouring to tie up a massive rose bush that's trying to block the driveway. On the final heave, the rope snapped and I fell, no, plummeted to the ground. Right on top of a rockery. One rock thumped my right thigh, dead-legging me. A second rock kissed my right elbow, dead-arming me. As I lay gasping, the wheelbarrow fell on top of me, casting its load of thorny rose branches as a ready-made tangle onto my chest and face. When my workmate, Michel, had stopped laughing and helped me up he discovered that the rockery contained an enormous dog turd, half of which was now stuck to my back and head.


It was said that you would destroy the Shit, not join it!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 14 December, 2021, 04:55:29 PM
In an attempt to best your woes, Shark - I once took a strimmer through a fresh dog turd, which had the effect of splattering me, head to toe.

I realized that I needed some assistance, but I could feel that there was turd shrapnel on my lips, so I didn't want to say anything - so I was tapping the back door to the house with a (non-shitty) stick, and groaning like a zombie trying to get someone's attention.

You'd have thought that The Generation Game had nothing to teach us - but sometimes they'd challenge middle-aged, middle-class couples to eat a creamy pastry without licking their lips.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 December, 2021, 06:29:44 PM

Heh, I once strimmed a very dead hedgehog, spattering myself in pungent Walking Deadness. I thought it was weed juice until I came to pick the bits out of my beard. Sometimes I marvel that I'm still alive :-D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 14 December, 2021, 07:39:51 PM
Crikey, Sharky, you really know how to do things. No half measures for you. I cringed reading your escapades. Feel better, man.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 December, 2021, 08:47:59 PM

Thanks, vB - feeling seriously sore right now. An early night beckons.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 14 December, 2021, 09:38:32 PM
Well if it's any consolation, that tale of woe gave me a good LOL. Sorry, I'm a terrible person.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 15 December, 2021, 07:19:31 AM

No you're not, Tips - it was extremely funny to watch. I may even change my name to The Legendary Wile E. Coyote!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 15 December, 2021, 09:33:23 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 15 December, 2021, 07:19:31 AM

No you're not, Tips - it was extremely funny to watch. I may even change my name to The Legendary Wile E. Coyote!

I didn't want to say, but as the events unfolded it did feel like I was reading the script of a cartoon :)

(get well soon)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: I, Cosh on 15 December, 2021, 10:25:48 AM
I remember my dad strimming a frog once. He didn't recommend it. Funny story as long as you're okay!

I lost my Dante badge last night. A little good crest I've had on my winter jacket pocket for ages. Can't even remember where I got it. Bah.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: von Boom on 15 December, 2021, 02:19:26 PM
Now THAT's an impediment, Cosh. Hope you find it. Check unused boots in the cupboard, it might have fallen into one of the.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 16 December, 2021, 12:38:12 PM
Holy Heck, Sharkie! You really have been through the wars lately. Hope that you'll be back on the mend soon.

In the meantime, I attach the following link, as I was reminded of this little gem while reading of your recent mishap.

https://www.anglersnet.co.uk/forums/index.php?/topic/45373-funny-poem-the-sick-notemurphy-and-the-bricks/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 December, 2021, 01:17:45 PM

Heh, classic!

I'm doing fine, thanks - still a little stiff but the pain's easing and the swelling's going down.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 16 December, 2021, 02:15:21 PM
Feck, Sharkie, glad you're on the mend.  Cosh, that's a fecker.  That's the kind of thing I really hate losing, and I lose things all the time. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 17 December, 2021, 03:50:26 PM
What seems very much like a "bomb scare" style threat has been circulating on TikTok that suggests there will be some kind of violent assault in a US school today (the 17th), so (across the entire country) many schools are cancelling classes - many students are anyway staying home.

I'm sitting waiting for my class to arrive.

It would be a ridiculous overreaction - if this wasn't the USA.

Odd, though, that something that used to disrupt a single building or institution can, with the help of social media (and ridiculous gun laws) affect an entire multi-state nation.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 18 December, 2021, 09:28:34 PM
I broke my middle toe on Thursday whilst getting ready for work and now I'm off for a few days recovering.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 December, 2021, 07:16:43 PM
My printer is intermittently jamming, and not in a fun Bob Marley reggae kind of way.  :(
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 22 December, 2021, 10:36:13 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo on 17 December, 2021, 03:50:26 PM
What seems very much like a "bomb scare" style threat has been circulating on TikTok that suggests there will be some kind of violent assault in a US school today (the 17th), so (across the entire country) many schools are cancelling classes - many students are anyway staying home.


I'm guessing it was a hoax?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 23 December, 2021, 03:53:12 AM
Quote from: sheridan on 22 December, 2021, 10:36:13 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo on 17 December, 2021, 03:50:26 PM
What seems very much like a "bomb scare" style threat has been circulating on TikTok that suggests there will be some kind of violent assault in a US school today (the 17th), so (across the entire country) many schools are cancelling classes - many students are anyway staying home.
I'm guessing it was a hoax?

Can of worms, Sheridan.

On the one hand, you could call it a nationwide hoax. Because it seems to have been sparked on social media with that intention.

On the other hand: there's been a sequence of what are being called TikTok challenges in schools in the US this year. The first was to vandalize bathrooms - so people vandalized bathrooms. The second was to strike a teacher, so people struck teachers. So, there's precedence here that if a dare goes out online, people will respond to it, even if it's clearly not in their best interests.

So, a rumor starts that the next "dare" is to cause a serious violent disturbance in schools on Dec 17th, and because this is the US, a lot of people take that very seriously. And then some kids start making actual threats, and several arrests are made (two at the school district that neighbors mine) across the US.

End result: no actual violent incidents occur, but the attendance of students that day plummeted to about 50% and a bunch of kids ended up arrested (some for making stupid threats online, some for carrying a deadly weapon onto school grounds).

I suppose the sad reality (in the US) is that gun ownership is on the rise, and so are school shootings (data here (https://everytownresearch.org/maps/gunfire-on-school-grounds/)), and rather than have a specific day when it's going to happen, it's going to be a nasty surprise, and it's something that seems impossible to make safe because of the collective insanity around gun ownership and safety in this country. Or, as Eina the Barmaid used to philosophically reflect: "shower o' c*nts!"

I suppose I've posted this in "minor impediments" because it's seen by politicians and many, many citizens as well as just a natural hazard of being in the *cough* greatest nation on Earth.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 January, 2022, 07:41:03 PM
I sharpened all of the kitchen knives this morning.

And I'm chopping the onions and tomatoes for a chana massala...
Can you guess where this is going?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 30 January, 2022, 06:18:17 PM

Your spats caught fire...?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 31 January, 2022, 11:16:25 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 29 January, 2022, 07:41:03 PM
I sharpened all of the kitchen knives this morning.

And I'm chopping the onions and tomatoes for a chana massala...
Can you guess where this is going?

How many fingers did you lose?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 31 January, 2022, 11:49:56 AM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 29 January, 2022, 07:41:03 PM
Can you guess where this is going?

Wotcher 'Arry
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 20 February, 2022, 12:57:14 AM
The storm blew down part of my fence. Spent my Saturday fixing it and making sure the rest of it was secure. I swear storms were more benign before the met started anthropomorphising them. Still, it was nice change from Brexit and covid being the source of my embuggerances.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 21 February, 2022, 03:22:56 PM
As if being struck down by the flu for the last week wasn't bad enough, in addition to the normal symptoms one would expect, this morning I woke up completely deaf in my right ear! Between that and a dry, rasping sore throat, my communication options will soon be reduced to using Morse Code.

Given that I am clearly too delicate for this world, I am now seriously considering taking a leaf out of Sheldon's book.  :)

https://tenor.com/view/telepresence-sheldon-big-bang-theory-gif-14326903


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 16 March, 2022, 04:25:54 PM
Last week the strap on my work bag snapped en route to the station.
I decided to replace it with a backpack. I haven't worn a backpack actually on my back for years, and as I was leaving the house yesterday I heard a sort of crash behind me as I was closing and locking the door. I tried to open the door and check, but I couldn't, because I had of course knocked the coat stand over and now it was wedged between the door and the stairs.
We had a train to catch so the wife and I legged it as I confidently informed her we could borrow a broom from a neighbour when we got home and use it to move the obstruction. Of course, to cut a long story short, that didn't work because the door only opened about half an inch and we ended up totally stuck outside our house.
We did manage to get in eventually - after I used a borrowed walking stick through the tiny gap to move the doormat, which allowed me to shift the stand by basically slamming the door into it repeatedly before squeezing my hand through the now-widened gap and after much effort, lifting it up enough to get the door open. Whilst this was happening my neighbours came out and watched from outside with great amusement whilst the cat stared at me with wide-eyed horror from indoors.
There was no Prog waiting for me on the doormat either.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 16 March, 2022, 07:08:36 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 16 March, 2022, 04:25:54 PM

There was no Prog waiting for me on the doormat either.

Oh my word, that is absolutely gutting!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 17 March, 2022, 12:20:26 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 16 March, 2022, 04:25:54 PM
Last week the strap on...

My mind boggled. I wasn't sure whether to keep reading!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 March, 2022, 12:42:37 PM

*chortles*

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:49:45 PM
Wait till you see my post on 'Life is riddled with a procession of minor NSFW impediments'

My Prog still hasn't arrived btw, and that's not a euphanism.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:52:50 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:49:45 PM
My Prog still hasn't arrived btw, and that's not a euphanism.

I already wish I hadn't said this. The concept of shouting 'the progs arrived!' at a climatic moment is now lodged horrifyingly my brain.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dark Jimbo on 17 March, 2022, 01:04:34 PM
🤣🤣🤣
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 17 March, 2022, 01:42:06 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:52:50 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:49:45 PM
My Prog still hasn't arrived btw, and that's not a euphanism.

I already wish I hadn't said this. The concept of shouting 'the progs arrived!' at a climatic moment is now lodged horrifyingly my brain.

Prepare the way for the Mighty One!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 17 March, 2022, 01:59:03 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 17 March, 2022, 01:42:06 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:52:50 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:49:45 PM
My Prog still hasn't arrived btw, and that's not a euphanism.

I already wish I hadn't said this. The concept of shouting 'the progs arrived!' at a climatic moment is now lodged horrifyingly my brain.

Prepare the way for the Mighty One!

And his Mighty Organ!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 17 March, 2022, 09:20:48 PM
I'm waiting for a breakdown truck!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 17 March, 2022, 10:02:45 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:52:50 PM
The concept of shouting 'the progs arrived!' at a climatic moment is now lodged horrifyingly my brain.

There is just no words to respond adequately.  For decades we have tried to avoid the sexualisation of Tooth.  At a stroke (fnar, fnar) this has been undone ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 18 March, 2022, 09:26:59 AM
Then I guess my work here is done.

Tiplodocus, did you get home after your breakdown? (I assume this wasn't another euphemism)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 18 March, 2022, 09:37:54 AM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 17 March, 2022, 10:02:45 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 17 March, 2022, 12:52:50 PM
The concept of shouting 'the progs arrived!' at a climatic moment is now lodged horrifyingly my brain.

There is just no words to respond adequately.  For decades we have tried to avoid the sexualisation of Tooth.  At a stroke (fnar, fnar) this has been undone ...

Have we?  The very first prog features Probe*'s butt.

* fnar
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 23 March, 2022, 07:10:14 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 18 March, 2022, 09:26:59 AM
Then I guess my work here is done.

Tiplodocus, did you get home after your breakdown? (I assume this wasn't another euphemism)

Actually I didn't. We broke down at night about 70 miles shy of Manchester so when they asked us where we'd like to be recovered to, we reckoned Manchester would have a big selection of garages who could repair the car under warranty. Not so. Nothing until mid April.

So we arranged to go back to Jockland where our local garage could fit us in yesterday.

Come Tuesday morning, thirty minutes before pick up, Green Flag (for it was them) called to tell us they had cancelled the pickup because policy states that a follow on pick up is limited to ten miles which they "generously" extended out to twenty

I took an extra day off work and called round every KIA garage in the area working out if they could take us and if they had room to have a car sitting until they could.

But no KIA dealer in that radius could fit us in until mid April.

Green Flag refused to budge and recover us back home despite their being no garages that could take us until April. "Policy says NO".

So now I'm on a train having effectively abandoned my car at a garage 250 miles from home. The garage will finally run a diagnostic on 12th April. So I might get the car back a week later.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 23 March, 2022, 10:42:31 PM
Quote from: Tiplodocus on 23 March, 2022, 07:10:14 PM

I took an extra day off work and called round every KIA garage in the area working out if they could take us and if they had room to have a car sitting until they could.

But no KIA dealer in that radius could fit us in until mid April.


After years of mortgage, kids and other unavoidable expenses, I finally got my dream car last year - a Kia Stinger. A few weeks ago the lock cover on the drivers door came off (either knocked off or someone tried to break in). No major, first service coming up in a few weeks so I request a new one.

Turn up the the KIA service centre and get told that I should be at the other service centre - 45 minutes away. Rather than driver across town and back (twice), I rebooked it, but had to wait another three weeks for a slot.

Dropped it off at the right one yesterday and when I came to pick it up, the lock cover hadn't been replaced - it takes 8-10 weeks to come from Korea. No flights between Korean and New Zealand anymore, dontchaknow?

So I've got an ongoing source of irritation - a beautiful car that looks like I bought it from a dodgy guy behind the pub.

Oh and a rattling issue that I logged before the service - needs a new part, which is 8-10 weeks away because, y'know...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 27 March, 2022, 09:20:00 PM
Update on my car lock thingy. Went back to work on Friday for the first time in a month or so. Parked at my usual spot & there is my lock cover. Looks like some tw@ was indeed trying to break in.

I now have a new parking spot, more expensive but in a high traffic area.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: milstar on 02 April, 2022, 09:27:34 PM
Ah, since recently, I returned to my old hobby (if you can call it a hobby), that of making brief little trips to the bookmaker. As a punter, I cannot say I had any luck, but today I lost my ticket somewhere on my way home. As some games are about to begin, I can only hope that I blew up my betting skills before some poor old blighter picks it up and collects the cash.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 19 July, 2022, 12:01:54 PM
It's funting hot. 23° at 3am last night, and this morning I felt close to collapse on my walk to walk. I have never felt such heat.

And yet, people I know still think it's hilarious to post memes about 2022 people being 'snowflakes' because apparently 1976 was hotter. No it snecking wasn't. I was there, and it was  'nice'. This- THIS- is horrific.

And my son is 19 today, which is frankly terrifying.

And my current workplace smells of weed, thanks to the people in the flat below.

I am a grumpy funtwipe today.

SBT
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 July, 2022, 12:12:01 PM

Same here. Weeding the campsite today is like auditioning as Satan's gardener.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 July, 2022, 12:21:11 PM
Wouldn't Satan's gardener be planting weeds?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 July, 2022, 12:52:28 PM

Not in this bloody weather - it'd be against Infernal Filth and Debris regulations.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 19 July, 2022, 12:58:52 PM
Quote from: SmallBlueThing(Reborn) on 19 July, 2022, 12:01:54 PM
And yet, people I know still think it's hilarious to post memes about 2022 people being 'snowflakes' because apparently 1976 was hotter. No it snecking wasn't. I was there, and it was  'nice'. This- THIS- is horrific.

The peak of the '76 heatwave lasted fifteen days and averaged a maximum temperature of 32°. There was one very localised spike on one day that hit 36°. This bloody thing is going to have temperatures reaching 40° across a huge chunk of the country. That's a UK record, across a massive swathe of the country, for two consecutive days.

I have no idea how people can be just so straight-up bloody stupid — the difference of 8°C is huge. I mean, would they say there was no difference between a day that was 10° and one that was 18° (ie: the difference between really quite cold and fairly pleasant)? Or 18° and 26° (fairly pleasant and really quite warm)?

I am so sick of these fuckwits trying to every damn thing into some kind aspect of their 'culture war' on 'wokeness' and 'snowflakes'.

(Additionally not helped by Dominic Raab, the fucking deputy Prime Minister, saying on TV, when asked about the Met Office's weather warning for extreme heat, that 'everyone should go out and enjoy the sunshine.')
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 19 July, 2022, 01:24:23 PM
I've seen a post this morning claiming the heat is the result of airplanes distributing 'chemicals' into the air Sunday night to 'trap' the heat for two days and so fuel support for a false climate change agenda.
Some people are absolutely batshit crazy.

On the subject of our deputy prime minister, I think he should be left out* to 'enjoy the sunshine' for a few hours and and see what he thinks then.

* by which I mean, staked out
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 July, 2022, 02:57:57 PM

The Sharkshed's corrugated tin roof isn't helping matters at the moment, nor are the four windows because none of them open. I've been keeping an eye on a lump of thunderstorms (https://www.lightningmaps.org/#m=oss;t=4;s=0;o=0;b=56.35;ts=0;y=51.6862;x=-2.395;z=7;d=2;dl=8;dc=0;tsc=1;dn=0;tc=0;) wandering through Wales and hoping they'll get here some time this evening to clear the air and provide some end-of-sizzle celebratory fireworks instead of veering off or fizzling out.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 19 July, 2022, 03:25:06 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 19 July, 2022, 02:57:57 PM

The Sharkshed's corrugated tin roof isn't helping matters at the moment, nor are the four windows because none of them open. I've been keeping an eye on a lump of thunderstorms (https://www.lightningmaps.org/#m=oss;t=4;s=0;o=0;b=56.35;ts=0;y=51.6862;x=-2.395;z=7;d=2;dl=8;dc=0;tsc=1;dn=0;tc=0;) wandering through Wales and hoping they'll get here some time this evening to clear the air and provide some end-of-sizzle celebratory fireworks instead of veering off or fizzling out.

On the plus side, the chances of the SharkShed being taken away by a tornado are pretty remote. You've been through the wars enough already, Sharky, without becoming this forum's resident Dorothy.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 July, 2022, 03:30:09 PM

Don't jinx it...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 19 July, 2022, 04:28:28 PM
I don't think we're in Preston any more Toto...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 19 July, 2022, 04:34:34 PM
Quote from: Barrington Boots on 19 July, 2022, 01:24:23 PM
I've seen a post this morning claiming the heat is the result of airplanes distributing 'chemicals' into the air Sunday night to 'trap' the heat for two days and so fuel support for a false climate change agenda.
Some people are absolutely batshit crazy.

On the subject of our deputy prime minister, I think he should be left out* to 'enjoy the sunshine' for a few hours and and see what he thinks then.

* by which I mean, staked out

BUT... They put a giant telescope up in space, and like a giant magnifying glass its burning us ants!!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 August, 2022, 08:50:11 AM

Gah. I've had a sore Achilles tendon for months now but I woke up this morning and could hardly walk. Time off work beckons...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 14 August, 2022, 12:28:35 PM
Hope you get to a doctor, Shark. My personal experience with nagging knee pain is that I should have done something about it before I ended up injuring myself quite badly.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 August, 2022, 12:49:01 PM

Went to the sawbones with it a couple of months ago. He gave me some exercises to do which eased the condition somewhat but this morning it just suddenly felt like I'd been kicked by a donkey. Maybe I twisted it in my sleep or something. Anyway, a good excuse for kicking back with a prog or two :-)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 14 August, 2022, 02:16:00 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 14 August, 2022, 08:50:11 AM

Gah. I've had a sore Achilles tendon for months now but I woke up this morning and could hardly walk. Time off work beckons...

Aw, that sucks, Sharky. Hope you'll be up and about again soon.

(A couple of decades ago, I woke up to discover that my left foot had been afflicted with Tendonitis. Funny thing is, at the time it happened, I was living on the top floor of a 5-Floor apartment block. Walking or putting any sort of weight on it was very painful. And so, to get to the ambulance which awaited me outside, I had to make my way down the stairs by gripping each step, raising my body slightly into the air and then - in combination with my hands - using my one remaining good foot to propel me forward. Think of a cross between Samuel Beckett, and Leonardo DiCaprio's crawl in The Revenant and you have some idea of just how ridiculous I must have looked.  :) )
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 14 August, 2022, 06:52:44 PM

Thanks, Paddy. Luckily, the Sharkshed has no steps - but it also has no toilet so I've been hobbling over to the bog block and back with a walking stick like a 90 year old incontinent. Ah Dignity, why hast thou forsaken me?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 15 August, 2022, 04:59:39 PM
Get well soon, Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 15 August, 2022, 09:24:22 PM

Thanks, JBC. Seems to be easing off a bit now, thank Grud!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 18 August, 2022, 04:11:50 PM
Hope it eases off and you get relief, just about to send the next thrillpack!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 August, 2022, 04:53:05 PM

Cheers, Huffy - in fact, the pain disappeared as quickly as it came and I'm as back to normal as I'm ever going to get. According to the sawbones, with whom I had a 'phone appointment with earlier today*, it was probably a trapped nerve.


*Brilliant, these modern medics, how they can diagnose at a distance. Must be some kind of telepathic allopathy (teleallopathy? there's a Dredd strip in there somewhere...).

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 18 August, 2022, 10:15:51 PM
I feel your pain Shark, or at least a variation thereof.

When I was 20 I got caught up in an argument between gravity and a ladder. It left me with two things:


Luckily, this happened to me in Northern Ireland, where some of the finest osteopaths in the world* live. However, my cybernetic implants gave me weather predicting abilities. When the atmosphere is damp and changeable, or as it's known locally, the weather, sharp pains in my left ankle let me know it's going to rain. I am well used to this.

Yet a weird variation happened this week. It was humid and changeable. This caused a different kind of pain to which I was not familiar and is hard to describe to someone without cool cybernetic implants.

*Because of all the kneecappings. No joke, my doctor was on retainer for a couple of NBA franchises who would pay him thousands just to look at x-rays and give a second opinion. The guy had pictures of himself and most of the 1992/6 Olympic dream teams.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 19 August, 2022, 02:48:44 AM
I'll preface this post by stating that I left my wife earlier this year after 21yrs together. It was my choice and I've actually found that being male, in your forties and with a good job makes you quite eligible - a far cry from when I was male, in my twenties and a poor student.

Dating has been going well for me and I've been quite happy with the split until a few weeks ago when my ex shocked me by asking if I wanted to reconcile.

Up until that point, I knew what I was going and my head was screwed on right. That question completely threw me and, frankly, messed me up a bit.

So I called up a counselor whose advice I taken in the past and booked in a session to talk things out. That was last night - a one hour session that ended up taking nearly two. It was good, I got a much clearer understanding of what was going on in my head (and potentially in my exes) and I left in high spirits.

So I decided to sprint through the rain to get to my car in the dark... and ran straight into a brick letterbox.

One smashed Fitbit and a couple of cracked ribs later, I'm not so sure about this counselling thing!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 August, 2022, 03:43:28 AM

This monodirectional time thing can be really hard to navigate, I find. It always seems to end up running into things and dragging us all with it. Sore ankles, smashed bones, and cracked ribs; but undaunted. "Man was not made for defeat," or so somebody once said, probably right before breaking his hand in a gin-fuelled bullfight over several women.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 12 October, 2022, 01:10:40 PM
So my landlord for the last thirteen years - a thoroughly decent and humane man, who has shown me much personal kindness and support through some very difficult times (and whom I regard as a friend) - has confirmed that the house has been sold.

He has assured me that, as part of the sale contract, myself and the other sitting tenants will be allowed to remain in situ, and that there will be no change to our situation. I have absolutely no doubt as to his sincerity on this, and that he has done all that he can in the interest of our welfare.

But still, I have to admit to some concern as to our collective future.

When the bloke who is buying the house was checking out each flat - accompanied by a bank official as part of the evaluation process - I jokingly remarked, that I was thinking of swapping out my bed for a hammock,  so that I could fit more books into my flat.

The guy's deadpan response, said without a trace of humour, was: "I don't read books."

Which told me everything I needed to know about him. Guess I'll just have keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 25 October, 2022, 09:35:05 AM
I have pneumonia. Which was diagnosed when I was referred to hospital because a kidney stone was not going anywhere.

I feel terrible.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 25 October, 2022, 10:15:11 AM

Sorry to hear that, EDX, I hope you get well soon.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 25 October, 2022, 10:47:22 AM
Get well soon dude! Pneumonia is rank.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 25 October, 2022, 11:19:35 AM
Pneumonia AND kidney stone? I tremble to wonder at what gods you have offended.
My sympathies, Doc.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 25 October, 2022, 04:49:24 PM
Yikes, EDX! Take care and I hope you'll recover soon. All the best and cheers - Paddy
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 25 October, 2022, 06:55:15 PM
Oof, a double whammy. Get well soon mate
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 29 October, 2022, 08:50:13 PM
Blimey! Get well soon.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 November, 2022, 10:37:11 AM
Online banking!

I just cannot, for the life of me, get my head around the process. It used to be so much easier back in the good old days. I've just spent the last half-hour trying to buy The Sarge: Volume 1 online and have given up.

Maybe I'm just stupid, but I find it all just too complicated. If it is not the wrong Rebellion password that I'm putting in, then it is the one for the bank or something else that I'm doing wrong. Because of my particular cognitive difficulty when it comes to figuring out technical / internet stuff, what I need is someone who knows all about this malarkey, to guide me, in person and beside me. But as I do not know anyone who can steer me through the process, I am sunk!

Reckon that I'll go to my usual comic store instead, pay them in cash and see if they can order it in for me instead. I feel like such a fucking dunce right now!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 November, 2022, 11:21:38 AM
I never have any problems with online banking until I do, and then I'm stonewalled.
Various extra layers of security have made things unreasonable. I used to be able to sort out my finances on my PC, but now I need my PC and my phone, which doesn't pick up a signal where I work. Oddly enough, I have better access through my phone on its own, which strikes me as odd. I mean, any tech-savvy pickpocket can get at my phone, but to get at my PC you'd have to physically break into my house and already have my computer password as well my banking details.
The bank helpfully explained that all this is for my own good.
They wouldn't be just saying that, would they?

I found The Sarge in my local bookshop, and liked it lots.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 18 November, 2022, 12:05:37 PM
My current 2000ad & Meg subscription has lapsed because I changed my debit card -  but I cannot get in to my account to change this and renew. My old password doesn't work, and I'm simply not receiving the 'reset password' emails - but weirdly, I am getting an email saying 'we have received a login attempt from a browser we have not recently seen' every time I try.

I miss just being able to have a chat with Denise who'd sort it immediately.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 November, 2022, 12:29:58 PM
I don't even have a smartphone. I find them too finicky and awkward to use, as I could never figure out that tapping screen stuff (for much the same reason as I find internet techy stuff hard to figure out). I'm either tapping too hard or not hard enough. And don't even get me started on all that scrolling malarky, lol!

I would need someone to be actually physically beside me, literally guiding me through each step of the process. I then write down each step to be taken, in my own hand-writing, after which - with a certain amount of practise - I can then refer to my notes, if needed, so as to perfect a technique that works for me.

Anyways, one quick call to my favourite comic shop has sorted out the problem. The lads in Sub-City comics have ordered The Sarge for me, and it should - postal problems / delays in Brit-Cit aside - be ready for me to collect next week. (And for six euro cheaper than if I had ordered it online!)

For any Irish Squaxx, or those visiting the Emerald Isle, I would heartily recommend a visit to the best little comic shop in the world. (I've had a standing order for 2000AD with them for many years now.)

https://www.subcitycomics.ie/





Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 November, 2022, 12:40:46 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 18 November, 2022, 12:29:58 PM
For any Irish Squaxx, or those visiting the Emerald Isle, I would heartily recommend a visit to the best little comic shop in the world.
But it's in Dublin!
The last time I went to Dublin – I'm not kidding – they asked for my passport.
(Alright, this might not have been the last time, but it was back in the days when you could fly from Cork cheaper than taking the train.)
'Passport,' said the man at Security.
'But I just got off the plane from Cork,' I said.
'Passport,' he repeated.
'I am a citizen of the Irish Republic,' said I, with a touch of hauteur.
'Speak fookin Engish,' said he.
(Alright, I'm making up a lot of that, but the point is that I never feel very welcome in Dublin, and it's a bloody long way away.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 November, 2022, 12:58:43 PM

I don't even have a bank account. It makes life so much simpler. Duller, sure, and devoid of tranklements, but definitely simpler.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 November, 2022, 01:07:01 PM
I had to look up 'tranklement' to see if it's a real word.
I'm glad that it is.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 November, 2022, 01:49:08 PM

My old Granny used the word all the time (as in, "oh bollocks - I've dropped me teeth into me tranklements drawer,") and I guess it stuck with me.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 18 November, 2022, 03:06:44 PM
Ah yeah, Sub City are sound - since my switch to digital, though, I'm not half as familiar with the place as I used to be.  IIRC, the main man there was Rob Curley, who was an indie-press script droid in his own right.

I generally used to try to buy my paper prog in one of the few newsagents that still stocked it, however.  My thinking was that I could singlehandedly turn back the clocks and convince newsagents that selling comics was a good idea.  Ah, the ideals of youth. 

Truth is, if 2000ad was as scarce in the shops when I was a kid as it later became, I never would have found it in my small Irish town and would be a nonscrot to this day.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 December, 2022, 12:21:42 PM

At around 7 o'clock this morning, a delivery van coming up our drive half fell into a ditch, blocking the drive for around four hours until a tow truck arrived. All for a parcel no bigger than a packet of cigarettes. Which should have been delivered next door anyway. That's a bad day - when you have to ring up your boss and not only tell him that you've driven into a ditch but also that you've driven into the wrong ditch.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 05 December, 2022, 11:51:36 AM
Now now, that's hardly fare, Sharko.

He was driving into all the right ditches. Just not necessarily, in the right order.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 05 December, 2022, 12:25:39 PM

:-D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 December, 2022, 12:24:32 PM

Hrrgh. Starting at 05:30hrs when I noticed the oldest dog had vanished* into the night, leaving a mess in his bed, and spent nearly two endarkened hours scouring the farm and the ditches along the side of the road out front without success, and then being shouted at for not having time to do something that wasn't my responsibility anyway, and then being saddled with tasks that'll delay my own tasks, today has been one of those that try men's souls. And it's only lunchtime. Hrrgh.

*Zippy, the old dog (whose mind seems to be going, sadly) was rescued from the road out front by a local lorry driver and taken to their local depot, from where I later picked him up a bit confused but none the worse for wear. Zippy was fine, though.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 07 December, 2022, 03:56:00 PM
Well, at least Zippy was found okay. Which I imagine is the most important and good thing to take from the day? And puts everything else into perspective, perhaps? (When it's yourself that is found wandering the roads and in need of being rescued, well, that will be another matter, altogether.  :D)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 December, 2022, 05:25:27 PM

Ah, Zippy had a high old time being stuffed full of biscuits by cooing mechanics in a tropically warm workshop. I was the one freezing cold and worried sick for three hours. Still, you're right, all's well that ends well and I managed to get through the day without having to pull my own beard off - so yeah, all-in-all I'm taking the win.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 December, 2022, 09:05:44 PM
MUGGED BY A SEAGULL!

So there I was, late Saturday afternoon in St Stephen's Green, Dublin and I had decided to take a break from the hustle and bustle of life and have my afternoon snack ( a Veggie falafel from Dealz, if you must know). I had just taken out said snack from my bag, and before my arse had even made contact with the bench I was  suddenly dive-bombed by a Seagull! (At least with Stukas you had some sort of advance warning. This particular flying git came out of nowhere like some sort of stealth bomber!)

It promptly bit off half of the falafel and flew off. But instead of having the decency to make good its escape, the bloody creature whirled about, landed about ten feet away from me on the path, and proceeded to mock me by guzzling away on my feckin' lunch!

Well, if the air had not already been blue from the cold, it certainly was after the torrent of abuse and curses that I hurled at the aforementioned avian terrorist. I can safely assure you all, that my questioning as to the legitimacy of it's birth was on a minor scale, compared to the other oaths which I uttered towards it.

One of the barmen in Grogan's pub, to whom I later related my sorry tale of ambush and woe - I was in a state of shock and needed some calming down in the form of a pint - reckoned that one of the reasons for these bird attacks, is the depletion of fish stocks in the seas off the coastline of the Emerald Isle.

And he may well be right.

But if, at some future point, Stephen's Green is indeed reduced to fifteen blades of grass and a bush called "Kevin" - as predicted in the Garth Ennis scripted Dredd story "Emerald Isle" - my guess is that said devastation will not be the result of nuclear fallout. Rather, it will be from the tragic, and environmentally disastrous aftermath, of irate citizens going mad from having their lunch nicked and rampaging through the park on a wild and frenzied Gull cull.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 December, 2022, 09:20:15 PM
Seagulls are beyond decency. This is not adequately appreciated by one or more locals where I live. These misguided malcontents actually go out of their way to feed seagulls. This can make walking by the quays unnerving. One moment it's just some clown shaking out a bag of bread crusts, the next -- SEAGULL STORM!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lincnash on 18 December, 2022, 09:27:38 PM
hahaha :-)

Quote from: paddykafka on 18 December, 2022, 09:05:44 PM
MUGGED BY A SEAGULL!......

At least with Stukas you had some sort of advance warning. This particular flying git came out of nowhere like some sort of stealth bomber!

Keeping with the WWII analogy your pesky seagull reminded me of the RAAF Bristol Beaufighter.
"The Japanese paddykafka nicknamed this plane seagull 'Whispering Death' due to the speed at which it could suddenly appear, strike and disappear,"

https://acesflyinghigh.wordpress.com/2012/08/10/raaf-bristol-beaufighter-whispering-death/

Chippies?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfIRHREMgm4
;-)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 December, 2022, 09:32:09 PM
Not a mugging but certainly a menacing: I was ganged up on by an ever-increasing number of crows in a public park in Brussels a few weeks back. Belgian crows have nothing on Irish seagulls, but there were a lot of the bastards and they were on their own turf. Shameful to admit, but I took myself and my sandwich elsewhere at speed.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 December, 2022, 09:38:08 PM


This reminds me of a very old and completely non-pc joke from back in the day, which I will spoiler to protect the delicate sensibilities of right-minded people everywhere...

[spoiler]"What would you do if a bird shat on your head?"

"I'd finish with her."[/spoiler]

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 December, 2022, 09:58:51 PM
In honour of olden days, my delicate sensibilities had a non-pc chuckle at that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 18 December, 2022, 11:01:27 PM
Quote from: lincnashOZ on 18 December, 2022, 09:27:38 PM
Chippies?
(https://images.fineartamerica.com/images/artworkimages/mediumlarge/2/bullying-bird-will-mcphail.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 19 December, 2022, 07:22:02 PM
Quote from: JWare on 18 December, 2022, 09:32:09 PM
Not a mugging but certainly a menacing: I was ganged up on by an ever-increasing number of crows in a public park in Brussels a few weeks back. Belgian crows have nothing on Irish seagulls, but there were a lot of the bastards and they were on their own turf. Shameful to admit, but I took myself and my sandwich elsewhere at speed.

Sounds like you had a narrow escape there, JWare, when one considers that the collective noun for those feathered beasties is A Murder of Crows.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 19 December, 2022, 07:39:00 PM
Better a murder of crows than a Skanger of Seagulls.
(And if that's not the word, then it is now.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2022, 09:12:41 PM

A GBH of seagulls?

An ASBO of seagulls?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 19 December, 2022, 09:14:11 PM
(https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BZWQ0YjUwZGEtMjZlZC00YTdmLTliMTMtZThmZDAzNThkOTUyXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMjUyNDk2ODc@._V1_.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2022, 09:19:43 PM

ASBO it is.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 19 December, 2022, 09:23:07 PM
'Flock' certainly won't do it (unless you can get away with hairstyles like that).
ASBO it is, unless you're in Dublin. Then it's definitely a skanger of seagulls.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 19 December, 2022, 09:27:05 PM
Quote from: Mister Pops on 19 December, 2022, 09:14:11 PM
(https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BZWQ0YjUwZGEtMjZlZC00YTdmLTliMTMtZThmZDAzNThkOTUyXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMjUyNDk2ODc@._V1_.jpg)

Angus Deaton looks a bit awkward in that photo
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 19 December, 2022, 09:30:59 PM
Quote from: The Enigmatic Dr X on 19 December, 2022, 09:27:05 PM
Angus Deaton looks a bit awkward in that photo

He's got Paddykafka's falafel on his conscience.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lincnash on 19 December, 2022, 09:54:50 PM
I saw the way this thread is heading and didn't walk away, I ran.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lincnash on 19 December, 2022, 09:59:16 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2022, 09:12:41 PM
GBH

Definitely my preferred noise and hairstyle with a choice over seagulls.

(https://i.postimg.cc/85fRjmsh/tumblr-inline-pc6pyfsbqc1srvqwb-500.jpg) (https://postimages.org/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2022, 10:09:52 PM

What are those two in the middle doing?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lincnash on 19 December, 2022, 10:51:28 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 19 December, 2022, 10:09:52 PM

What are those two in the middle doing?

The blokes from GBH seem to be grabbing at each others Sex Pistols!

(https://i.postimg.cc/QCb32P1m/gettyimages-500945076-1024x1024.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/gLnQRgML)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 December, 2022, 02:40:11 AM

I believe that's known as "playing the banjo."

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 December, 2022, 12:22:59 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 18 December, 2022, 09:05:44 PM
But if, at some future point, Stephen's Green is indeed reduced to fifteen blades of grass and a bush called "Kevin" - as predicted in the Garth Ennis scripted Dredd story "Emerald Isle" - my guess is that said devastation will not be the result of nuclear fallout. Rather, it will be from the tragic, and environmentally disastrous aftermath, of irate citizens going mad from having their lunch nicked and rampaging through the park on a wild and frenzied Gull cull.


As somebody who still hasn't visited Dublin (despite much of my family coming from Ireland* **) my mind immediately went to Ennis and Dillon's minor opus upon mention of Stephen's Green.




p.s. hoolligulls we call 'em.




* just too long ago to enable me citizenship :-(
** Limerick on one side, Tipperary on the other...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 20 December, 2022, 12:40:36 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 20 December, 2022, 12:22:59 PM
just too long ago to enable me citizenship :-(
But why would you ever want to be a citizen? Aren't you happier being a subject, with a shiny new king to cheer and huzzah?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 20 December, 2022, 12:56:16 PM
Quote from: lincnashOZ on 19 December, 2022, 09:59:16 PM

(https://i.postimg.cc/85fRjmsh/tumblr-inline-pc6pyfsbqc1srvqwb-500.jpg) (https://postimages.org/)


Nice to see someone finally gave Yosser a job.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 December, 2022, 01:50:33 PM
Quote from: JWare on 20 December, 2022, 12:40:36 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 20 December, 2022, 12:22:59 PM
just too long ago to enable me citizenship :-(
But why would you ever want to be a citizen? Aren't you happier being a subject, with a shiny new king to cheer and huzzah?

I mean, they're not that new - according to Prog 1 we should have had 'em by 1999 at least.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 20 December, 2022, 01:58:04 PM
You should heckle the coronation procession next May, loudly demanding to know why Charles skipped out to Canada twenty-odd years ago, leaving you all at the mercy of the Volgans.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 20 December, 2022, 04:24:47 PM
And what did happen to Prince John?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 20 December, 2022, 04:51:17 PM
Even as a British citizen, you're fully entitled to live and work in Ireland. Once you have lived here long enough, you're even entitled to vote on in council and parliamentary elections.

You just wouldn't have a say on constitutional referendums or election of the head of state.

But sure, you'd be used to that.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 20 December, 2022, 05:12:04 PM
Quote from: sheridan on 20 December, 2022, 04:24:47 PM
And what did happen to Prince John?
William and Kate have him walled up in their cellar. Nothing may challenge the succession.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 December, 2022, 06:24:42 PM

There will be no succession. The king intends to ingest certain plant extracts in the precise doses related to him by a stand of exocosmic pine trees in order to live forever. It's apparently all to do with God's Ineffable Green Plan. Or possibly some form of psychosis, depending on whom one asks.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: lincnash on 21 December, 2022, 12:07:20 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 20 December, 2022, 06:24:42 PM
...Or possibly some form of psychosis...

Yep, we drokked him up in '66, long term scars.

"I learnt an enormous amount in Australia and discovered just how direct and friendly and straightforward and so often blunt Australians are...But with such an incredibly good sense of humour."

On night treks His Majesty, then Prince of Wales, remembers

    "leeches and snakes and those enormous bull ants and funnel web spiders... I loved it and I learnt a lot from it."
On August 1, 1966, the former Prince of Wales returned to the UK a very different person. "

https://www.princes-trust.org.au/hm-in-australia/a-special-connection

Like something out of the Cursed Earth.
(https://i.postimg.cc/sxcWz3yQ/4a7aaa4df8b954b16762ec5a58b48ad4-width-800-d1f0044.jpg) (https://postimages.org/)
Extremely aggressive with strong biting mandibles and a stinger in it's tail that has burning venom.
Dune Sharks, Gila Munja, Flying Rat Swarms?
Pffft.
:-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 05 January, 2023, 02:30:57 PM
Some folks will probably know my primary hobby and outlet is filmmaking, small, pithy mood pieces on celluloid.

I recently took my first step into standard (or 'double') 8MM production by purchasing a nice little pocket Bolex from the early 60's. Bought from a licensed reseller for a solid price, i was really excited to get into the thick of it. Less than 72 hours latter, on my first shoot, I fucked the damn thing up by somehow shattering the variable shutter dial, causing the clockwork mechanism to go into freefall and effectively exploding in my hands.
Turns out you're only supposed to control the variable shutter then the motor is running, not in lock. A stupid little mistake on my part, but a humbling one.

Always read the manual on your decades old gear folks.

(Up shot, went to purchase a new one of the same model from the same seller and he sent me a replacement for the price of shipping for my troubles. Sometimes small communities rock like that.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 16 January, 2023, 05:48:30 PM

I've been having pains in my legs for six months or so. The sawbones reckons it's acute thrombosis - which isn't the same as dvt - so now blood tests and ultrasound scans beckon. I've never had an ultrasound before so I'm quite looking forward to that experience, but it's a bit of a bummer on the whole.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 16 January, 2023, 07:54:14 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 16 January, 2023, 05:48:30 PM
I've been having pains in my legs for six months or so. The sawbones reckons it's acute thrombosis - which isn't the same as dvt - so now blood tests and ultrasound scans beckon.

If you haven't sworn off the fags already, you really, really should — my mum ended up losing both her legs at the knee to smoking-related thrombosis.

(You'd have thought losing the first one might have tipped her off to the risks, not to mention the fact that the exact same thing happened to her dad, but, nooooooo...)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 January, 2023, 07:37:16 AM

You're right Jim, of course, and I'm sorry about your Mum's ordeal. My problem is that I find it difficult to care very much about my own future, and always have - I'm a "live for today" kind of guy when it comes to my own life. I'm smoking a rollie as I type this - and that's nobody's fault but my own.

Given all the run-ins we've had, Jim, and the way my perspective tends to wind you up, I am honestly and deeply touched that you should be the first one to care enough to take the time to offer advice; so thank you, really.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 17 January, 2023, 07:55:53 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 17 January, 2023, 07:37:16 AM
I'm smoking a rollie as I type this - and that's nobody's fault but my own.

Heh. Given that smoking killed both my mum's parents and, although it wasn't what saw my mum off in the end*, it obviously didn't turn out well for her, either... the fact that I'm currently in the process of stopping smoking again should give you a clue that I'm well aware that this is a thing easier said than done.

*Dementia hit early (somewhere before her mid-60s... as with all progressive diseases, it's hard to know exactly when) and she literally forgot she smoked, almost overnight — sixty a day to none. I can't recommend it as solution to quitting, though. ;-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 17 January, 2023, 10:15:46 AM
Best of luck to ya Sharkey.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 January, 2023, 10:24:23 AM

Thanks, Link :-)

Jim, I always say that quitting is easy - I've done it loads of times :-D

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 17 January, 2023, 12:59:41 PM
Aye, best of luck Sharks, in health and in all that m'larky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tiplodocus on 18 January, 2023, 11:46:30 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 17 January, 2023, 07:37:16 AM

You're right Jim, of course, and I'm sorry about your Mum's ordeal. My problem is that I find it difficult to care very much about my own future, and always have - I'm a "live for today" kind of guy when it comes to my own life. I'm smoking a rollie as I type this - and that's nobody's fault but my own.

Given all the run-ins we've had, Jim, and the way my perspective tends to wind you up, I am honestly and deeply touched that you should be the first one to care enough to take the time to offer advice; so thank you, really.

He's not wrong. And giving up the flags will (after the initial hassle) make the life you live today better as well.

I should add I am not qualified to back up this statement having being too chicken to take up smoking in school (I reckon that must be where it gets most people), I've never had to give up.

Closest I've come is taking up running in later life which has helped me shed a few stone, be generally fitter and healthier (my regular back problems and colds have reduced massively) and allows me to keep up (just) with the grandweans.

But I hope it all works out well for you Sharky.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 January, 2023, 12:24:47 PM

Thanks, chaps.

I'm just waiting for an appointment to get scanned; apparently there aren't any available for the foreseeable future.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 18 January, 2023, 01:37:58 PM
Wishing you the best, Sharky and hope that all works out well for ye.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 18 January, 2023, 05:36:24 PM

Cheers, Paddy - it's all part of the adventure!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Proudhuff on 19 January, 2023, 04:01:00 PM
Good luck Sharkie, or that's the spirit as Roy Battie would say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 19 January, 2023, 07:56:52 PM
Best of luck Sharky
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 26 January, 2023, 01:33:40 PM

Cheers :-)

Scan appointment in eight weeks. Probably. (A fact it's just taken me an hour's worth of 'phone calls* to discover.)

*which equates to 2 minutes of actual conversation and 58 minutes of Greensleeves.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Richmond Clements on 26 January, 2023, 07:22:37 PM
I've never smoked, but when someone I know tries to quit, I always point out that David Bowie said giving up cigarettes was harder than giving up heroin. You got this.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 27 January, 2023, 08:51:50 AM
Best of luck, Sharky. You're a stubborn old fecker, you'll get through this no bother :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 29 January, 2023, 01:39:45 PM
I recently took up boxing, one because its fun and extremely cathartic, and two to help shed some weight. I've been doing quite well, lost a whole pound in just two months and have started to feel some kind of muscle mass I haven't had in a good five years. All very good stuff.

Except not entirely. I woke up yesterday with the mother of all stomach pains, and promptly took myself into Bolton General A&E. Turns out I've developed an umbilical hernia. The doc was a good lad, explained apparently this is actually quite common for folks of certain body types who shift a lot of weight in a short amount of time. They'll be back to me with a proc date but otherwise I might actually have to use my staff insurance benefits for once.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 January, 2023, 02:46:39 PM

Ouch. Hope you get it sorted soon, Hawkie.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rara Avis on 29 January, 2023, 09:57:12 PM
I knocked over my Judge Death figurine and broke both his arms. I found most of the bigger pieces but I can't find his little finger. FML.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 30 January, 2023, 08:23:43 PM
Because it wasn't raining and because I'm one classy individual, I wore black suede shoes today. I was five minutes out the door when I saw I'd managed to get toothpaste on one of them like a big drooling idiot.
This kind of thing never happened to Max Normal.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 31 January, 2023, 10:16:01 AM
Quote from: Rara Avis on 29 January, 2023, 09:57:12 PM
I knocked over my Judge Death figurine and broke both his arms. I found most of the bigger pieces but I can't find his little finger. FML.

I feel for you! Has the finger been recovered, and can he be fixed?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rara Avis on 02 February, 2023, 06:04:45 PM
The finger has not been recovered. It fell in a really awkward and dusty place so I plan to have a proper look for it this weekend.

I'm pretty sure I can get him fixed but I don't want to get my hopes up as I know the person is retired and they may not be inclined to take it on. I'll pop down to the local shop this weekend and see if I can suss it out; need to finger though.

I certainly can't it it with my hammer hands.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rara Avis on 06 February, 2023, 10:28:31 AM
I FOUND THE FINGER!!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 06 February, 2023, 01:19:18 PM
Congrats :D
But don't we now need a 'Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments that sometimes come out alright in the end if we're lucky' thread?
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 06 February, 2023, 02:49:19 PM
Quote from: Rara Avis on 06 February, 2023, 10:28:31 AMI FOUND THE FINGER!!



So you'll be literally giving the finger to Judge Death?  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Rara Avis on 08 February, 2023, 06:24:57 PM
Sure why not, he's currently 'armless  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 15 February, 2023, 12:27:36 PM
Want to know what I received in the post on Valentine's Day?

A nice card from a mystery lady admirer?

Hand-delivered flowers or a box of chocolates?

Oh, no.

Instead, I got a letter from the Department of Social Protection, informing me that they were rejecting my application for Rent Allowance for a number reasons, but chiefly because the application did not include a tenancy agreement with the new landlord and also a rent book showing payments made by me to him.

I pointed out the importance of both of those documents, when I was handing him the other supporting documents for him to submit with the application to the DSP. He said that he would get those documents sorted out. Clearly he did not do so, which means that I am back to square one as regards getting the rent arrears cleared.

I contacted Citizen's Information and the nice chap whom I met with last week said that he will call me today. In the meantime, having finally come to the conclusion that my life is nothing but a sick and spectacularly bleak joke, I did the only sensible thing possible.

I went to my nearest pub and got horribly drunk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 15 February, 2023, 04:21:45 PM
Happy Valentine's Day, Paddy.
This is fucked.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 15 February, 2023, 04:52:00 PM
Quote from: JWare on 15 February, 2023, 04:21:45 PMHappy Valentine's Day, Paddy.
This is fucked.

You're not wrong there, mate. As the man says: "If it wasn't for bad luck, I'ld be havin' no luck at all!"

I've been a complete bag of nerves since yesterday. The Cit's Info guy will be calling me tomorrow instead. I really hope that this whole problem - which was not of my fault or making - can be resolved soon, as the stress which it is causing me is just bloody unbearable at this stage.

Thanks & Cheers - Paddy
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 June, 2023, 04:44:31 PM

Well, I've finally had the ultrasound scan of my legs. Apparently, it ain't so bad - slight arterial narrowings in a couple of places. Still need another appointment to go through the prognosis and whatnot but, for the moment, I'm probably not going to drop dead at any second and nobody needs to break out the saws. So, apart from the discomfort when I walk, it's looking good - although I'm afraid that means you're going to have to put up with me for a while longer :) . I'm not really a worrier but a weight I hadn't realized was there has been lifted.

Also, I wish I could tell you what the vascular scientist and I talked about - but a) they asked me not to and b) you don't want to hear it.

Time for another rollie, methinks. Oh, and a celebratory beer or three...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 28 June, 2023, 05:42:00 PM
May the Shark live forever, and may his legend increase among the nations.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 28 June, 2023, 08:02:15 PM

Yikes!

(https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fficquotes.com%2Fimages%2Fquotes%2Fking-leonidas-300-2006-1877.jpg&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=d6e9b11a692a19fe8a0d856ac2d86525aaea08ae5ce168586ab482e47c68ef8f&ipo=images)

I'm not greedy - two or three thousand years will be more than enough, lol.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 June, 2023, 10:13:37 AM
Whether it's Left, Baby, Blahaj or Legendary, the internet needs sharks. Stay well buddy.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 29 June, 2023, 11:25:38 AM

Cheers, DDD - and the same to us all!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 01 July, 2023, 09:48:40 AM
Got myself banned permanently from the SuperheroHype Community forums for "insubordination, trolling, sexism and transphobia" for criticising Phoebe Waller-Bridge's character in Indiana Jones and defending my initial post with a (now admittedly) well-known troll who for some strange reason, used transgender people in their argument (which he didn't get banned for).

Sigh... Why do I even bother anymore.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 01 July, 2023, 09:54:57 AM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 01 July, 2023, 09:48:40 AMGot myself banned permanently from the SuperheroHype Community forums for "insubordination, trolling, sexism and transphobia" for criticising Phoebe Waller-Bridge's character in Indiana Jones and defending my initial post with a (now admittedly) well-known troll who for some strange reason, used transgender people in their argument (which he didn't get banned for).

Sigh... Why do I even bother anymore.

Since then, I've since learnt that said troll is still pretty much active on the site and that he, along with the admin that banned me are not only now citing two of my examples as positive female role models (Ellen Ripley & Princess Leia), but are also defending the movie with a number of staff & users, convinced of two things (that anyone who criticises Waller-Bridge's character is a sexist & misogynistic troll and that the film will be a critical & commercial success story that will stand the test of time).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 10:14:17 AM

We're not allowed to have genuine differences of opinion any more, because disagreement has somehow become a hate crime.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Batman's Superior Cousin on 01 July, 2023, 10:48:28 AM
That's sadly very much true in today's day and age, it's becoming more & more PC every week, both online and on opposite sides of the Atlantic Ocean.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 01 July, 2023, 12:00:51 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 10:14:17 AMWe're not allowed to have genuine differences of opinion any more, because disagreement has somehow become a hate crime.



Sorry, I really don't agree with you on this ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 01 July, 2023, 12:56:45 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 10:14:17 AMWe're not allowed to have genuine differences of opinion any more, because disagreement has somehow become a hate crime.



It truly is interminable being a man of culture in the age of the MCU, I agree.

 ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 01:41:47 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 01 July, 2023, 12:00:51 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 10:14:17 AMWe're not allowed to have genuine differences of opinion any more, because disagreement has somehow become a hate crime.



Sorry, I really don't agree with you on this ...

How very dare you hate on me like that... :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 01 July, 2023, 05:23:55 PM
Quote from: Batman's Superior Cousin on 01 July, 2023, 10:48:28 AMThat's sadly very much true in today's day and age, it's becoming more & more PC every week, both online and on opposite sides of the Atlantic Ocean.

Well, you say that. But: the Supreme Court (US) made a ruling yesterday that it's okay for business owners to refuse to serve same-sex couples, if it goes against their religious beliefs. The day before, it overturned college-admission affirmative action. A Canadian province just passed a law that stops teachers from using students' preferred pronouns without parental permission. Florida has passed laws that make it criminal for teachers to tell anyone their preferred pronouns (at school), and also criminal to teach anything about gayness or transgenderism. None of this could be described as "becoming more & more PC".

My Youtube algorithm keeps posting up clickbait videos that have their thumbnail image edited so that "Karen's get what they deserved" is being imagined as "what they deserve" being a bloody, violent retribution involving a baseball bat and serious bruising to the face. So - y'know, Youtube is openly promoting casual violence against "unreasonable" women. It's never a "Ken" in the thumbnail.

As for the question of Phoebe Waller-Bridge's character in the latest Indy movie - I think you should feel free to post whatever opinions you have about that. Equally, if people feel that any opinion is in some way crossing a line, then they should be able to bring those points. That there be debate, me hearties.

Or: it's okay to dislike the stereotype of a Karen (or Ken), but to suggest that they should be beaten up as a punishment - that's crossing a line into something else entirely. Right? (Not that you did that - I'm speaking generally.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 01 July, 2023, 05:46:21 PM
Sorry to double-post, but (as if to prove my point), my YT-algo immediately dropped these in my lap:

(https://i.imgur.com/cr8z3fD.png)

(https://i.imgur.com/xAREqiC.png)


It's just not presenting an overly-PC world at me. (To be fair, I have watched some Karen/Ken videos, so I probably deserve that one showing up - but I've tried my absolute best to avoid anything involving Bill Burr because he's so clearly an enormously self-satisfied c*nt with an axe to grind.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 02 July, 2023, 07:33:38 AM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 01:41:47 PM
Quote from: Tjm86 on 01 July, 2023, 12:00:51 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 01 July, 2023, 10:14:17 AMWe're not allowed to have genuine differences of opinion any more, because disagreement has somehow become a hate crime.



Sorry, I really don't agree with you on this ...

How very dare you hate on me like that... :lol:

Oh, I hate it when you do that ....  :lol:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Tjm86 on 02 July, 2023, 07:53:33 AM
On a slightly more serious note, I'm finding it fascinating following the current debate about 'cancel culture' and reports on how people are finding it increasingly difficult to navigate the choppy waters of acceptable language.

I've been working through Foucault's lecture series from the early 80's in which he is discussing his understanding of Parrhesia, what he considers to be 'acceptable' speech acts.  The lectures are looking into the way it was used in Ancient Greece but a lot of what he is talking about is relevant today.

In particular he explores the element of 'risk' involved in speech.  The fact that there is always the possibility of someone being offended and reacting aggressively, even violently in those days.  He gives examples of where it was being employed and how.

It seems that we are living through quite an extreme example of this right now.  The violent clashes we see between different groups shows that the 'risk' dimension is very real.  In some respects I suppose it is fair to say that terrorist actions such as 9/11 could be seen as part of this.

Social media is potentially a slightly more benign environment in this respect.  Granted the abuse and vitriol that 'offenders' are subjected to is unpleasant.  It is also true that this spills out into the sort of physical attacks described above.  Similarly, people have lost jobs or services because of statements made.

There is a definite negative dimension to this in that responses are terrifyingly extreme.  It is more than mere disagreement, more than ostracism.  There is a visceral aspect to responses that is disturbingly powerful, almost irrational.

At the same time, perhaps there is a positive dimension too.  There is a recognition of the power of language to affect people.  There is space to consider how we deal with the impact of 'speech'.  At the moment we seem to be struggling to find a rational, assertive way to handle it.  The primary response seems to be to try to shut down language and ideas that disturb us. 

Then again there are a lot of folks that also find that disturbing.  The struggle is with finding a way to engage with this.  There seem to be enough people walking this line, searching for a more rational approach. 

Where this is going is anyone's guess mind ...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 02 July, 2023, 10:23:05 AM

From Socrates to Julian Assange, the powerful and the ignorant have always feared and punished free speech.

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." Aristotle. This is the attitude we need to get back to, imnsho.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 02 July, 2023, 11:50:30 AM
So much omphaloskepsis over a predictably poor Indiana Jones movies*.

Imagine, you could have avoided all this by just watching a good movie.

*Not that there's ever been a good one, afraid to say.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 02 July, 2023, 03:50:03 PM
There has always been a cancel culture. There was no Number 1 in the charts when the Pistols' anti-monarchy song was doing particularly well.  Gerry Adams had to be dubbed on BBC News.  The Catholic Church at the height of their power in Ireland were particularly adept at ostracising dissenting voices.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 02 July, 2023, 04:40:33 PM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EslusIuXIA04lKo.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 02 July, 2023, 06:16:04 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 02 July, 2023, 04:40:33 PM(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EslusIuXIA04lKo.jpg)

Nailed it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 04 July, 2023, 10:01:19 PM
Wait....What? Microwaved takes on freeze peach aside, they made another Indy Movie? What kind of degenerate, cocaine addled sociopath thought the world needed another another Indiana Jones movie? Does some Hollywood coke fiend have a vendetta against Harrison Ford relaxing into retirement? Indy is a generic pulp action hero. Could they not recast? Was Chris Pratt too busy?

I sincerely was not aware that this was a thing until I saw a poster last week. In Portugal of all places. The poster was beside a larger image of Christiano Ronaldo in his skants. Can you guess which image disturbed me less?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 05 July, 2023, 09:25:42 AM
It really is a baffling one, as I haven't even seen a trailer for it outside of some Kia product promotions and the red carpet spiel they always play at chain cinemas before the movie you actually want to see starts.

It's not so baffling when you simply chalk it up to Disney Execs. being Disney Execs. again, there's always a 95% drained money boil that can do with being lanced again if they can squeeze those last few dollars out of an increasingly jaded fanbase.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 05 July, 2023, 05:39:28 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 02 July, 2023, 03:50:03 PMGerry Adams had to be dubbed on BBC News.

I'm contractually obliged to post this whenever that gets mentioned: The Day Today - IRA (https://youtu.be/UOUeauLWEaE)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 06 July, 2023, 01:49:18 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo [R] on 05 July, 2023, 05:39:28 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 02 July, 2023, 03:50:03 PMGerry Adams had to be dubbed on BBC News.

I'm contractually obliged to post this whenever that gets mentioned: The Day Today - IRA (https://youtu.be/UOUeauLWEaE)


A classic. 
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 July, 2023, 11:40:25 AM
going on holiday today and missed my feckin flight. Every time I have followed the instruction to arrive 2 hours early, I've then had an hour and a half wait in departure lounge but due to problems with the baggage system the queue was immense and arriving an hour and a quarter early wasn't enough - I was still queuing for security when the gate closed. Back home now with an afternoon flight booked that has added another £150 to my trip.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 July, 2023, 11:57:36 AM

Ugh, that blows. Hope all goes well from here on in, DDD, and that you enjoy your holiday.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Barrington Boots on 20 July, 2023, 01:04:48 PM
That sucks dude! I hope the holiday is great when you finally get there!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 20 July, 2023, 01:47:15 PM
Attempt #2 - taking no chances. I'm checked in, bag dropped and through security lickety split. It's over 2 hours to my flight. Time for a pint I think.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 20 July, 2023, 05:07:26 PM


...wakes up under a table in the airport bar, six hours later...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 July, 2023, 01:04:30 PM
After ten long and faithful years, my tenacious little Ipad Gen 2 lite has gone to the great landfill in the sky. The last few years where rough (downloading the prog, all I used it for, became like pulling teeth) but
fortunately have enough solvency to pick up a decently discounted brand new Gen 9 to immediately replace it.

Not often you get quite such a lifetime out of an Apple product.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 26 July, 2023, 03:21:24 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 26 July, 2023, 01:04:30 PMNot often you get quite such a lifetime out of an Apple product.

Still (occasionally) use my first-gen iPod Nano. :)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 26 July, 2023, 06:41:04 PM
Those early models really do seem to have just been built differently, it'll be interesting to see how a newer model stacks up in the longevity department.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 27 August, 2023, 10:14:50 PM
The "e" key on my laptop's* keyboard has stopped working. Without an xtrnal usb kyboard all my sntancs ar rally hard to rad.


*It's a dcad old
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 28 August, 2023, 07:14:12 AM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 27 August, 2023, 10:14:50 PMThe "e" key on my laptop's* keyboard has stopped working. Without an xtrnal usb kyboard all my sntancs ar rally hard to rad.


*It's a dcad old

Whr thrs a will, thr's a way:

Gadsby (https://www.abebooks.com/books/gadsby-lipogram/)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 28 August, 2023, 07:14:50 AM
NM
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 29 August, 2023, 10:24:39 PM
PRSVRYPRFCTMN, / VRKPTHSPRCPTSTN

Inscription from a Welsh church, over a depiction of the ten commandments (clue)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 01:30:12 PM
I'm guessing PERUSE EVERY PERFECT MAN, EVER KEEP THE SOUP RECEIPT, STAN.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 31 August, 2023, 02:42:11 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 28 August, 2023, 07:14:12 AM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 27 August, 2023, 10:14:50 PMThe "e" key on my laptop's* keyboard has stopped working. Without an xtrnal usb kyboard all my sntancs ar rally hard to rad.


*It's a dcad old

A bloke goes to the doctor because he can't pronounce the letter "f" or the letter "t".

The doctor says, "you can't say fairer than that, then."
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 August, 2023, 02:47:34 PM

It's the " " key on my lappy, which is quite lucky because I hardly ever need  -rays or  ylophones. 

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 03:24:26 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 29 August, 2023, 10:24:39 PMPRSVRYPRFCTMN, / VRKPTHSPRCPTSTN

Inscription from a Welsh church, over a depiction of the ten commandments (clue)

Hang the feck on a minute. It's just one repeated vowel, isn't it?  I believe I've nailed it.  It rhymes and all.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 31 August, 2023, 03:43:39 PM
Who's the clever fella?
As soon as you provided the clues I got it in no time, and I'm usually useless at puzzles.
Off you go now, Jayzus, and find us the Holy Grail.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 04:18:40 PM
Quote from: JohnW on 31 August, 2023, 03:43:39 PMWho's the clever fella?
As soon as you provided the clues I got it in no time, and I'm usually useless at puzzles.
Off you go now, Jayzus, and find us the Holy Grail.

I believed I had found it, sadly, when I was 23.  I had just read Holy Blood, Holy Grail and was, I'm afraid to say, totally and utterly convinced, even though Danny Franks had introduced me to Occam's Razor when I was 11 - One quick slash of said item of Thrax's weaponry renders the entire theory a burst balloon.

Dan Brown may have ripped that book off wholesale, but at least he wasn't pretending it was true.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 31 August, 2023, 04:31:40 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 04:18:40 PMI believed I had found it, sadly, when I was 23.
Did it by any chance resemble a 2-litre plastic bottle of Linden Village cider?


As for fans of Dan Brown and all that take such shite seriously:
I hate hate hate HATE pseudo-history conspiracy bollocks. Really don't like it at all.

Interpreting the evidence should be enough for us. There's no call to be making up pernicious nonsense.
When I teach medieval history I make it a point to strip out the romance and trample on the dreams of my students. After that they can put the romance back in and dream new dreams, but this time based on actual evidence.

I'm not in this business to make friends.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 31 August, 2023, 05:15:01 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 04:18:40 PMI believed I had found it, sadly, when I was 23.

Go on...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 05:35:22 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 31 August, 2023, 05:15:01 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 04:18:40 PMI believed I had found it, sadly, when I was 23.

Go on...

See the ending of the DaVinci code?  That was what the writers of Holy Blood, Holy Grail concluded that the identity of the Grail was, or, far more likely, decided it was and did all in their power to edit actual history to make that decision seem like a conclusion. I won't reveal it as there's no spoiler tag option any more, but believe me, it's barely worth Googling.

I thought I was party to a select group of people who had finally stumbled upon the truth, rather than realising what I really was:  A gullible eejit who should have read a few real history books first.

JohnW - I'm not even a fraction of the historian you are, but I was listening to a podcast about the Antikythera Mechanism the other day, which surely proves conclusively that archeologists and historians DON'T suppress evidence that challenges existing beliefs of past cultures.  So yes - pseudo-history is bollocks.

Same goes for pseudo-science - I've heard how scientists conspire to hide any discovery that turns existing theories on their heads, yet there quantum theory is, smashing up Newtownian physics like a sub-atomic bull in a universe-sized china shop.


Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 31 August, 2023, 05:42:36 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 04:18:40 PM
Quote from: JohnW on 31 August, 2023, 03:43:39 PMWho's the clever fella?
As soon as you provided the clues I got it in no time, and I'm usually useless at puzzles.
Off you go now, Jayzus, and find us the Holy Grail.

I believed I had found it, sadly, when I was 23.  I had just read Holy Blood, Holy Grail and was, I'm afraid to say, totally and utterly convinced, even though Danny Franks had introduced me to Occam's Razor when I was 11 - One quick slash of said item of Thrax's weaponry renders the entire theory a burst balloon.

Dan Brown may have ripped that book off wholesale, but at least he wasn't pretending it was true.

Whenever Occam's razor is mentioned, I have a spiritual obligation to mention Newton's Flaming Lazer Sword is a thing.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Link Prime on 05 September, 2023, 09:40:26 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 05:35:22 PMI thought I was party to a select group of people who had finally stumbled upon the truth, rather than realising what I really was:  A gullible eejit who should have read a few real history books first.


Far worse crimes I imagine.

Forget Dan Brown - I was once approached by a Grant Morrison True Believer.
Walked out of Sub City Comics in Dublin sometime in the 90's with my regular pull list, including the usual from Vertigo.
Some guy in a trench-coat followed me down the street asking questions about "The Invisible College" ffs.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: sheridan on 05 September, 2023, 10:41:35 AM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 31 August, 2023, 05:42:36 PMWhenever Occam's razor is mentioned, I have a spiritual obligation to mention Newton's Flaming Lazer Sword is a thing.

Wow - thank you for introducing me to Newton's Flaming Laser Sword (https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Newton%27s_flaming_laser_sword) :-)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 05 September, 2023, 05:40:22 PM
Quote from: Link Prime on 05 September, 2023, 09:40:26 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 31 August, 2023, 05:35:22 PMI thought I was party to a select group of people who had finally stumbled upon the truth, rather than realising what I really was:  A gullible eejit who should have read a few real history books first.


Far worse crimes I imagine.

Forget Dan Brown - I was once approached by a Grant Morrison True Believer.
Walked out of Sub City Comics in Dublin sometime in the 90's with my regular pull list, including the usual from Vertigo.
Some guy in a trench-coat followed me down the street asking questions about "The Invisible College" ffs.

Think I remember you mentioning this before. Feckin hell.
I'll assume Grant only accepted his knighthood to lull the elites into a false sense of security- his chaos magick anarchist revolution will be kicking off any day now.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 05 September, 2023, 06:47:52 PM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 05 September, 2023, 05:40:22 PMI'll assume Grant only accepted his knighthood to lull the elites into a false sense of security...

Surely you can't imagine that was the *real* Grant? [Cue spooky music from The X-Files.]
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 05 September, 2023, 10:23:11 PM
You've already said too much.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 07 October, 2023, 07:14:57 PM
As if I don't have enough noise disturbance to be dealing with in this kip of a flat - what with the junkies screaming and roaring outside the front of the building for admittance, then kicking the bejaysus out of the door in an attempt to get in themselves when their cries go unheard (as in untill 2.30am this morning) - the bloody smoke detector in the flat has started chirping!

Naturally enough, it waited untill late last night to announce the fact that the batteries were in need of changing. Apparently I have to switch off the leckie to the flat at the mains before opening up the alarm cover to remove the batteries. (Presumably to avoid electrocuting myself. And with my luck that is exactly what would happen!) I have no idea where the mains switch is located for this flat in the block and of course, because it is the weekend, there are no council staff available to provide assistance for me.

For that matter, I haven't a scooby-doo how to even open the bastard detector so as to shut it up. I did give it a go - twisting it hither, thither and yon - but that only seemed to anger it even more, with the result that it  gave out even more urgent sounding beeps. So it looks like I'll have to endure the chirping fecker for the next couple of days and nights, at least until the council are contactable again on Monday.

Honest to Christ, but I haven't had a moments good luck since I moved into this feckin' dive. Looks like I'll have to try the old bog-roll-down-the-ears-to-cut-out-the-noise trick again. That being said, the last time I did so, I accidentally deafened myself when some of said bog roll got jammed down deep in my eardrum. ::)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 07 October, 2023, 07:17:35 PM

Can you tape some foam rubber or rags or something over the alarm until you can get it fixed?

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 07 October, 2023, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 07 October, 2023, 07:14:57 PMthe bastard detector

I know you didn't ask for help, but I'm wondering if there's any way of figuring out (serial number, brand name etc.) what type of alarm it is, and then googling how to open it up and get the batteries replaced? If it's battery-powered, then why would you need to switch off the mains? That seems not to make much sense. Of course, I'm no expert - perhaps it's got both power options and only uses battery as back-up.

Also, soft foam ear plugs aren't very expensive for a big pack.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: moogie101 on 07 October, 2023, 09:35:46 PM
Many have batteries but also wired to the mains, I recall one going off during the day when I was working nights and it ended up being ripped off the ceiling in desperation to shut it up.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 07 October, 2023, 09:38:34 PM
Indeed Funt, I believe it's mandated now fire alarms that are to be connected to the mains require a battery source as a back up in the event of a fire during a power surge or outage.

Commiserations Paddsters, and too think it all looked to be roses from the outset. I rather suspect there is little to be done until come the Monday morn, but I do echo Funt in the purchase of foam ear plugs. A savior of mine on many a festival when the festivities outstayed there welcome.

----

Been dealing with issues of my own in the new gaff, as the washing machine flooded the kitchen on the first use. Didn't even finish the cycle, the bastard. Whats more took the agent over a week before they agreed to send the contractor out. Apparently white goods issues are mine to resolve with the warranty, completely ignoring the fact it was clearly not fitted correctly in the first place.

Ey up now, this housing lark is a lot.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 08 October, 2023, 03:35:15 AM
Lest you imagine that I live in some sort of foamy-eared paradise - my luggage went missing on a recent flight to a wedding. So, chin-up, I ventured to the seaside resort of Dunoon to replace my wedding tackle. Wait, that's not right! Anyway - to get new wedding clothes, of course.

Now, the wedding was fine, and Dunoon managed famously in a pinch - but the airline (Lingus, those fannies!) are a bit shit about returning lost luggage - fobbing the job off to a call center somewhere on the other side of the world. To say they couldn't manage a piss up in a brewery would be to pay them a massive compliment.

As it stands, they've spent about ten days trying to deliver my lonely luggage to the wedding venue - long since abandoned! I may have found a solution, though - in that I got hold of an actual human being (wer sprechen die englisch) actually based at Glasgow airport. By Christmas, I may get my kit back, Grud-willing.

(I realize I'm an over-pampered gibbon - what with being able to afford a flight, and luggage, and to be able to shop in Dunoon - but it still sucks to not have my bag of holding.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 08 October, 2023, 07:05:41 AM


What goes up Might come Down. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KbUNzi58wM)

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 08 October, 2023, 02:58:09 PM
Quote from: Funt Solo [R] on 07 October, 2023, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: paddykafka on 07 October, 2023, 07:14:57 PMthe bastard detector

I know you didn't ask for help, but I'm wondering if there's any way of figuring out (serial number, brand name etc.) what type of alarm it is, and then googling how to open it up and get the batteries replaced? If it's battery-powered, then why would you need to switch off the mains? That seems not to make much sense. Of course, I'm no expert - perhaps it's got both power options and only uses battery as back-up.

Also, soft foam ear plugs aren't very expensive for a big pack.

Thanks for the suggestions, Funt. It says on the alarm itself: "Warning - Disconnect from Mains AC before Removal. See Instruction Manual."

Problem is, I don't have an instruction manual. Now that I've had a chance to look at the alarm in delight - and cross-referencing from what I've googled - I've learnt that I'll need to use a screw-driver to dismantle the alarm. But I still haven't the foggiest as to where the Mains AC is, so I'll still have to wait until the council offices reopen on Monday. Sigh.

Hope you manage to get your luggage problem sorted in the meanwhile. About which, I was at a Morrissey gig one-time and he - in a, for whatever reason(s) still clearly disgruntled reference to Aer Lingus - stated: "I will never fly Aer Fungus again!"

(Thanks also to Hawkie and Sharkie as well for your suggestions. Bog roll in the ears just wasn't cutting the mustard this time 'round. Mind get some ear-plugs later on.)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 10 October, 2023, 02:38:57 PM
Sorry to hear of your miserable experience, Paddy.  Noise at night is my least favourite thing in the world. I've tried the bog-roll-in-the-ear thing, but it ended in temporary deafness and a mate doing an amateur removal job with a tweezers.

I've had Aer Lingus lose my bags before, and my house keys were in it. I had to scale the porch and climb through an upstairs window.  I was sharing a house at the time and was praying my housemate wasn't home to see me wriggling through the small gap in his bedroom window.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 12 October, 2023, 11:35:56 AM
Quote from: JayzusB.Christ on 10 October, 2023, 02:38:57 PMI've had Aer Lingus lose my bags before, and my house keys were in it. I had to scale the porch and climb through an upstairs window.  I was sharing a house at the time and was praying my housemate wasn't home to see me wriggling through the small gap in his bedroom window.

Thanks, Jayzus. With regard to wriggling through the gap in your housemate's bedroom window - ooh, err Missuss! lol - if he had woke up, then you you could always explain it away, by saying that you were carrying out a routine house security check.  :D
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 October, 2023, 01:03:35 PM

Or...

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_96uP6vDZMT8/So2rU3GMHLI/AAAAAAAACfM/pVNQomvb29M/s400/VAMP+-+SALEMS+LOT.jpg)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 12 October, 2023, 01:11:39 PM
 :lol:  :lol:

I'm not quite sure how that would be better than telling him Aer Lingus lost my luggage with my keys in it  ;)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 October, 2023, 06:23:46 PM

Better, no. Funnier, maybe. Worth another round, at any rate...

Barkeep! Another mac-mac for my vampiric safety inspector friend!

*hic*

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 31 October, 2023, 05:01:40 PM
Well, youtube has banned adblockers and  I had never realized how aggressively user unfriendly that shite heap of a website is. The enshitification of the internet continues apace.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 31 October, 2023, 05:04:13 PM
I thought I was getting away with it by responding to feedback, nah, no adblockers here chum.
Got down to my penultimate strike before I realised that wasn't working, indeed, without third party modifications its become a festering pile of hyper aggressive marketisation.
Miserable.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 31 October, 2023, 05:42:07 PM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 31 October, 2023, 05:01:40 PMWell, youtube has banned adblockers and  I had never realized how aggressively user unfriendly that shite heap of a website is. The enshitification of the internet continues apace.

Ah - I wonder if that's a region-specific rollout. My adblocker is still functioning here on my US-PC. (And I need it - Youtube has way too many ads, and we use Youtube content in the classroom, as well.)

My ipad at home tends to fail miserably at ad-blocking YouTube - it fritzes out with a never-ending wheel-spin o' doom, but eventually shows a Skip Ads button (which has to be pressed twice).

If they roll out weaponry against ad-blocking, I can see myself downloading the videos and building up an ad-free library (for classroom work).
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 31 October, 2023, 07:07:12 PM

YouTube tends to delete a lot of the videos I want to watch, which I find both inconvenient and disgraceful. 

Okay, that sounds bad, like Prince Andrew Bad, but it's not like that. Honest.

Once the money moves in, the choice moves out. They want us to pay for our own censorship. What a twisted world of kaleidoscopic fairground mirrors the internet has become at the tentacletips of Big Business.



Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 31 October, 2023, 08:40:34 PM
YouTube used to have this fantastic "bubble search" function years ago, but I cannot find anyone who remembers it. Starting to think I imagined it.

Oh and someone told me that uBlock still works on YouTube, but don't take my word for it
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 31 October, 2023, 08:59:15 PM
So today was my first day on the office since youtube changed its policies, and it was through the cyclopean monitor of my workplace machine I glimpsed the  mundane dystopiary of latestage capitalism. But...

(https://media.licdn.com/dms/image/D4E22AQG7YS6_e9VHQQ/feedshare-shrink_2048_1536/0/1694112798484?e=1701302400&v=beta&t=p7vmeAsuUNaYPO3ZbkeTpf4VLkxYEYNwGM4RdbyjmH0)

My personal computer set up can still keep the mange ridden inbred degenerate runt of capitalist marketing at bay.

(https://i.gifer.com/6E8.gif)



...feckin "e" key still doesn't work though...

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 31 October, 2023, 09:22:32 PM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 31 October, 2023, 08:59:15 PM(https://i.gifer.com/6E8.gif)

Gif-love is real!
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 01 November, 2023, 12:32:32 PM
This dude seems to know what he's taling about with adblockers: https://imgur.com/gallery/FbNgEAg
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 17 November, 2023, 09:28:10 AM
Interior decorating is hard! Promised myself wouldn't default to IKEA for the essentials, ended up doing so because 1) I'm a lazy bum and 2) As nice as it is to bum about vintage and antique emporiums for the thing that's grabs you fuck me is it expensive.

Also, what inspired colour scheme did I end up settling on?

Black! BLACK! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIW9sL-Yf6Q)
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JohnW on 17 November, 2023, 05:46:18 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 17 November, 2023, 09:28:10 AMInterior decorating is hard!
My own furniture is flatpack interspersed with oddments that my grandparents probably bought in the fifties.
The flatpack illustrates not so much the principle of 'Buy cheap, buy twice', as 'Buy cheap, handle gently, and pray it holds together until some purely notional ship comes in'.
But black? No, sir. Black is too classay for this boy's tastes. Wood-effect formica all the way, baby.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 17 November, 2023, 05:55:35 PM
Have been using a VPN on my home computer, recently this has caused Google to think I'm a bot.
So then every time I search for something, I'd have to tick the 'not a robot' box* and then go through the 3x3 click on a bus/stairs/car/motorbike** nonsense repeatedly until it lets me through.
One time I counted thirty attempts at clicking on the stupid pictures and it still wouldn't let me through.
I fixed it by typing in 'bing.com' whenever it happened and using Bing*** instead.
After about a week, Google stopped asking for recaptchas.


*While hiding my avatar
**The drokking recapta pictures always give me existential nervousness - is the motorbike rider part of the motorbike? Is the shadow part of the bus? Only god and Google know and neither one is fracking telling.
***Bing is, for all intents and purposes, a complete dive bar toilet bowl of a search engine. Most times, I'd be better off asking my mum.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 17 November, 2023, 08:11:18 PM

I tend to use https://duckduckgo.com/

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 17 November, 2023, 08:49:28 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 17 November, 2023, 09:28:10 AMInterior decorating is hard! Promised myself wouldn't default to IKEA for the essentials, ended up doing so because 1) I'm a lazy bum and 2) As nice as it is to bum about vintage and antique emporiums for the thing that's grabs you fuck me is it expensive.

Also, what inspired colour scheme did I end up settling on?

Black! BLACK! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIW9sL-Yf6Q)

90% of the contents of my home came from charity shops. Furniture, clothes, utensils, crockery and many, many ornaments. Everything else I built myself (though my 80-year-old dad helped hugely, fair play to him.)

Having said that, my home is a one-room wooden cabin, apart from the bathroom and the mezzanine platform bit I sleep in. My friend built it for me and I did the interior, copying from 'cabin ambience' videos on YouTube. It's small but a lot bigger than the boat I lived in, and I fecking love it.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 January, 2024, 05:50:18 PM

Today, four days late, I got my pay packet for the last calendar month. There was £300 in it. I was overjoyed, a £50 pay rise, at last, after all those months of asking. I thanked my boss and told her how big a difference this would make.

But she'd miscounted. Thanked me for my honesty.

And asked for the money back.

This freedom lark can be a right pain in the plumbs (pun intended), sometimes.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Roberttrant on 04 January, 2024, 06:08:18 PM
 
 
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Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 04 January, 2024, 06:42:18 PM
Quote from: The Legendary Shark on 04 January, 2024, 05:50:18 PMToday, four days late, I got my pay packet for the last calendar month. There was £300 in it. I was overjoyed, a £50 pay rise, at last, after all those months of asking. I thanked my boss and told her how big a difference this would make.

But she'd miscounted. Thanked me for my honesty.

And asked for the money back.

I can't believe she asked for the money back. Here's to hoping that she has some other, more positive qualities.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 04 January, 2024, 08:40:51 PM

Well, she puts up with me. So there's that, I guess. And, erm...

Nope, that's just about it.

It's gotten very Steptoe & Son all of a sudden. I should write a book. Sitemares.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 21 January, 2024, 10:04:49 AM
Having spent the year saving up for a holiday for the family. we all took off for Sydney for a long week of relaxation. Then the lot of us caught covid and I ended up in emergency.

On the plus side, apparently my heart is in really good shape.

PS: on an unrelated(?) note, there are a metric crap load of bats in Sydney. Who knew?

PPS: The A&E I got taken to was St Vincent's - so apparently the Aussies have canonized me. Finally, some recognition!

Edits for PS & PPS as my brain catches up with events.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Jim_Campbell on 21 January, 2024, 10:27:51 AM
Quote from: Angry Vince on 21 January, 2024, 10:04:49 AMHaving spent the year saving up for a holiday for the family. we all took off for Sydney for a long week of relaxation. Then the lot of us caught covid and I ended up in emergency.

If it makes you feel any better... for our twentieth wedding anniversary, I flew my wife and I first class to New York, booked four nights in a very fancy Manhattan hotel... and on the morning of our first full day there, just after breakfast, I said "Ooh. I don't feel so good..." and had to run to the loo in our hotel room, where I basically remained for two full days, barring the nights, when I had to sleep in the shower.

It was certainly a... memorable trip, albeit not necessarily for the reasons I'd hoped. :sick:
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Angry Vince on 21 January, 2024, 06:12:27 PM
Quote from: Jim_Campbell on 21 January, 2024, 10:27:51 AM
Quote from: Angry Vince on 21 January, 2024, 10:04:49 AMHaving spent the year saving up for a holiday for the family. we all took off for Sydney for a long week of relaxation. Then the lot of us caught covid and I ended up in emergency.

If it makes you feel any better... for our twentieth wedding anniversary, I flew my wife and I first class to New York, booked four nights in a very fancy Manhattan hotel... and on the morning of our first full day there, just after breakfast, I said "Ooh. I don't feel so good..." and had to run to the loo in our hotel room, where I basically remained for two full days, barring the nights, when I had to sleep in the shower.

It was certainly a... memorable trip, albeit not necessarily for the reasons I'd hoped. :sick:

Sounds worse than my pre-honeymoon to Venice where I spent two days holding tight to the hotel toilet.

Anyway, I flew back home last night. Feeling better this morning and have just had a morning coffee and taken some flu medicine.
On closer inspection, I think I've picked from the wrong end of the Night and Day pack. Going to be an interesting day at work...
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 07 February, 2024, 08:54:32 PM
Yay - I've got Covid! Honestly, I felt like I was missing out. I'll be laughing on the other side of my face if my symptoms get worse, mind. As it is, some time off work is okay.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 09 February, 2024, 03:27:42 PM
Hark at you with yer exotic foreign new fangled lurgy. I've had the good old fashioned homegrown lurgy all week. Been pondering how it is that so much snot can fit in one (admittedly quite large) skull and worried that I might not make it to the Bill Bailey gig tomorrow night.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 09 February, 2024, 07:26:55 PM
Oh, and get well soon Funt. I've had the Covid thrice now, I've suffered worse with hangovers, but it's still no craic. How's your sense of taste?*

*in the aromatic sense. As a fellow squaxx, your taste was in entertainment is unimpeachable
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 09 February, 2024, 09:37:27 PM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 09 February, 2024, 07:26:55 PMHow's your sense of taste?

Taste seems to have survived. It just feels like a rough flu, overall. The weird thing is that it's triggered a rash - reminds me of measles. I've painted a plague mark on my door as a warning to others.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 10 February, 2024, 08:15:16 AM
Get well soon, Funt.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 11 February, 2024, 08:55:19 AM
Got COVID.


Uuurrggghhh. I'm glad I'm vaccinated up because if this is what it feels like with a readied immune system I dread how insufferable it would have been without.
My dietary palette shall be of a liquid persuasion for the time being, I fear.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 11 February, 2024, 01:21:18 PM
I'm afraid to hang around this thread - the Covid appears to be spreading. Hope you get well soon, Hawkie. I've had Covid - it isn't the end of the world but it's very debilitating.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Funt Solo on 11 February, 2024, 05:16:47 PM
Day #6 and I'm over the worst of it (knock on wood). Day #4 was pure man-flu territory - I was the walking dead. Reckon I'll be fit enough to get back to work tomorrow, but I will moan about it.

Get well soon, Hawk.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: paddykafka on 12 February, 2024, 12:44:06 PM
Glad to hear that you're recovering, Funt. I had a similar dose meself, recently and it's a nasty one to be sure. Hope that you'll be better soon as well, Hawk and likewise to yourself, Definitely Not Mister Pops.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 12 February, 2024, 08:08:29 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 11 February, 2024, 08:55:19 AMGot COVID.


Uuurrggghhh. I'm glad I'm vaccinated up because if this is what it feels like with a readied immune system I dread how insufferable it would have been without.
My dietary palette shall be of a liquid persuasion for the time being, I fear.

Wish you'd mentioned that before I got in a lift with you today!

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 12 February, 2024, 08:26:10 PM
Quote from: Dandontdare on 12 February, 2024, 08:08:29 PM
Quote from: Hawkmumbler on 11 February, 2024, 08:55:19 AMGot COVID.


Uuurrggghhh. I'm glad I'm vaccinated up because if this is what it feels like with a readied immune system I dread how insufferable it would have been without.
My dietary palette shall be of a liquid persuasion for the time being, I fear.

Wish you'd mentioned that before I got in a lift with you today!



I know that was my bad mate, I didn't even want to come into the office today but power was cut to the flat for maintenance and planning refused to grant me a sick day, word of a disciplinary.
Just another thing to hack me off today, I got complacent there and that was my mistake. :/
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: The Legendary Shark on 12 February, 2024, 08:49:29 PM

I eat a clove of garlic every morning (yet another reason why I have no friends...) and the last really debilitating shivery-cold-sweaty-achy-dizzy-"please-God-let-me-die" 'flu I had was in early February 2019 (and before that in my pre-teens). Since then, I've just had a handful of minor sniffles - apart from the problems with the arteries in my legs, of course, and knocking lumps off myself with various tools and species of flora. Maybe the garlic is helping and maybe it isn't but I'll keep on with it anyway even if it is just the placebo effect.

My best wishes to everyone who's suffering, I hope you shake it off soon and forever.

Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Hawkmumbler on 16 February, 2024, 09:41:11 AM
Tested negative two days on the trot, phew, must have had a weak strain on the virus.

What a relief.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 03 March, 2024, 09:07:41 PM
My plan for Sunday was to keg/bottle a batch of pilsner. Turns out I forgot to pitch the yeast. So I spent my Sunday disposing of a manky mouldy mess.

With no pint at the end.
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: Dandontdare on 05 March, 2024, 11:39:56 PM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 03 March, 2024, 09:07:41 PMWith no pint at the end.

the bleakest ending to any anecdote
Title: Re: Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments
Post by: JayzusB.Christ on 06 March, 2024, 02:01:00 PM
Quote from: Definitely Not Mister Pops on 03 March, 2024, 09:07:41 PMMy plan for Sunday was to keg/bottle a batch of pilsner. Turns out I forgot to pitch the yeast. So I spent my Sunday disposing of a manky mouldy mess.

With no pint at the end.

Aw, man.  Reminds me of when my sister's partner was planning to start a craft beer business and took a few bottles to my folks' house for market research - half of them erupted like vesuvius when opened and ended up all over the carpet. He never went into the craft beer business.