Threadjacking!

[The Legendary Shark]

And, from the holes in the skirting boards, they drew their plans against us...

[Funt Solo]

And, from the holes in the skirting boards, they drew their plans against us...

SQUEA-LAAAAAAAAA!

[JayzusB.Christ]

I've spent my whole life thinking the female lead in The Hunchback of Notre Dame was called Esmerelda, but have just discovered her name is Esmeralda.  I blame Jet Set Willy on the Spectrum, which definitely spelled her name with three e's.

And there are still mice in my ceiling.  Fuck sake.

[The Legendary Shark]

That'll be the mouse detectives, looking for the bodies of the victims you've already killed. They'll soon be closing in...

[JohnW]

Have you considered that the mice you hear are not in your ceiling but in your mind?
Little ghost mice forever pitter-pattering in your troubled conscience?

[Barrington Boots]

I'm still pushing for the snake solution...

My parents have rats in their loft and you have to check the traps all the time in case one gets killed in it and then starts rotting or worse, the others come and eat it. They multiply like mad though and they can't figure out how they're getting in.
Some years ago they had a rat specialist dude come over and he asked if birds were eating a lot of food in the garden. My Mum admitted she just hung out another of those suet balls whenever the old one was gone without thinking about it. He took her out into the garden and there under a remote bush was a pile of about a dozen mostly eaten suet balls that the rats had been taking off the tree.

Good luck with your mousepocalypse JBC!

[JohnW]

I've spent my whole life thinking the female lead in The Hunchback of Notre Dame was called Esmerelda, but have just discovered her name is Esmeralda.  I blame Jet Set Willy on the Spectrum

Funny now.
I always assumed it was Esmerelda with three Es too.
Of course, we didn't have a Spectrum in our house. We had to make do with rudimentary flint tools.

[The Legendary Shark]

Flint? Luxury!

[Funt Solo]

[JayzusB.Christ]

Have you considered that the mice you hear are not in your ceiling but in your mind?
Little ghost mice forever pitter-pattering in your troubled conscience?

I can't say it HASN'T crossed my mind.

Turns out I didn't kill ANY of the bastards - the traps just sprang by themselves.  My ceiling is going to end up like Planet Charon in Halo Jones, isn't it.

[JohnW]

Turns out I didn't kill ANY of the bastards

Things to shout into the night to reassure the neighbours.

[Funt Solo]

Sent from the future to terminate mouse-kind's greatest threat, beware the M-1000, JBC:

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

Some years ago they had a rat specialist dude come over and he asked if birds were eating a lot of food in the garden. My Mum admitted she just hung out another of those suet balls whenever the old one was gone without thinking about it. He took her out into the garden and there under a remote bush was a pile of about a dozen mostly eaten suet balls that the rats had been taking off the tree.

I've heard soaking bird feed in hot sauce deters squirrels from eating all the bird food. It would probably work for rats too. Apparently birds' taste buds don't react to capsaicin. Chillies evolved to take advantage of this. Only birds eat them and then spread their seeds over a larger area.

[Dandontdare]

[JayzusB.Christ]

Turns out I didn't kill ANY of the bastards

Things to shout into the night to reassure the neighbours.

Chortle!

They are doing my fucking head in though.  I won't use poison for fear of killing my neighbours' cats and dogs as well as the awful death it causes mice , and the traps aren't working.  Might have to call in pest control though I think they'd use poison too.