This is the News!

[Funt Solo]

Headline: 'I am completely besotted with this pigeon'

[Funt Solo]

Did IQ's just drop sharply while I was away?

If you read the article (about people getting their feet burnt when they ... burnt them) it says "It is not yet clear if there was an issue with the set-up of the coals or with how the group walked across them".

It's hot, you fucking morons! Hot things burn you.

Oh, the humanity...

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

This is a thing people do and I have done it*. There is a trick to it though. The feet have to be quite warm to reduce the temperature difference. Then you have to walk at quite a brisk pace. The key thing is your feet are not in direct contact with the hot coals longer than the shortest time it takes for the physical process of transferring enough heat from the coal to the flesh to burn the flesh. I think if you take longer than ~3 seconds to cross you'll be burned regardless.

There's a lot of things to go wrong there, could be hard to pinpoint exactly what but...

...it sounds like someone really put their foot in it.




*I have friends in a local circus skills club** who roped me into it.
** This is also a thing people do. Good for a side hustle too, because as Malcolm Tucker put it "... big public events always have wankers wi' stilts". I'm not sure that's an accurate quotation, but I'm not about to google "Wankers with stilts"

[JayzusB.Christ]

Did IQ's just drop sharply while I was away?

If you read the article (about people getting their feet burnt when they ... burnt them) it says "It is not yet clear if there was an issue with the set-up of the coals or with how the group walked across them".

It's hot, you fucking morons! Hot things burn you.

Oh, the humanity...

I've read that it can be done without burns, and, like every inexplicable feat, can be explicked with physics - the coals are hot but your feet don't spend enough time touching them to get injured. Tony 'I'm an Absolute Muppet of the First Order' Robbins apparently invites his audience to do it at his shit events.

Someone obviously fecked up in fine style here though, either in the heat of the coals or in the instructions to the participants.

[JayzusB.Christ]

This is a thing people do and I have done it*. There is a trick to it though. The feet have to be quite warm to reduce the temperature difference. Then you have to walk at quite a brisk pace. The key thing is your feet are not in direct contact with the hot coals longer than the shortest time it takes for the physical process of transferring enough heat from the coal to the flesh to burn the flesh. I think if you take longer than ~3 seconds to cross you'll be burned regardless.

There's a lot of things to go wrong there, could be hard to pinpoint exactly what but...

...it sounds like someone really put their foot in it.




*I have friends in a local circus skills club** who roped me into it.
** This is also a thing people do. Good for a side hustle too, because as Malcolm Tucker put it "... big public events always have wankers wi' stilts".

Feck. Beat me to it

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

By like 20 seconds. And on a post an hour and a half old. Weird coincidence that we replied at practically the same time.

[Funt Solo]

I'm glad you both responded because I got to enjoy "explicked with physics" and "Wankers with stilts".

And I got edumacated about the hot coals thing. I'll still never do it, mind.

[JayzusB.Christ]

I should also point out that I have been totally Elevenerife-ed by Mr Pops, who not only has firewalked himself but also ended his post on a splendid little pun. 

[Funt Solo]

Given that the European Court of Human Rights has stopped the Tories from enacting their Final Solution to the Brown People Problem, by halting the forced deportation of five people (on board an enormous jumbo jet capable of taking hundreds) to Rwanda.

Those silly Tories. Why don't they just nuke Brussels and strap asylum seekers to the missiles? That would solve both problems in one fell swoop. Where did I leave Rees-Mogg's number ... he'd love this idea.

[sheridan]

Well, Johnson did suggest feeding people to the fish to solve the ocean crisis...

[The Legendary Shark]

Ukraine Unveils Mini Ground Robot Equipped With Machine Gun. What could possibly go wrong...?

:-(

[Funt Solo]

Ukraine Unveils Mini Ground Robot Equipped With Machine Gun. What could possibly go wrong...?

:-(

I hear ya. Of course, we're already there with drones - this is just a ground capable thing of a similar nature.

The Chinese regime is using facial recognition and emotion-reading AI to figure out when people are nervous of their totalitarian regime (answer: always, you'd be mad not to be), and then using that data to arrest and enslave people they feel like arresting and enslaving.

How long before they automate the process? How long after that before the machines turn on their makers? Ask Jim Cameron, obs.

[The Legendary Shark]

It's got a fiber optic wire trailing from its butt. I shouldn't think old Howard's too worried. Might explain some of Hammerstein's more unglamorous Great Gram'ma stories, though.

[Funt Solo]

Now imagining the entire ABC Warriors retold from the perspective of their operators, who are just behind some cover, or just off-panel, a little ways off - just follow the fibreoptic cables. ABC Operators.

As MMO characters, lines like "Nobody honks on an ABC Warrior and lives!" make much more sense.

[Definitely Not Mister Pops]

What's the difference between a children's hospital and a terrorist training camp?

Don't ask me, I just pilot the drones...