Thankyou all for the advice. I don't have any 'hardcore' scifi fans to look over it which is my worry but at least it doesn't break any pitchfest rules. I have had it proof read by a couple of small press people and they liked it and showed interest which is good. Perhaps becuase they know I work to brief, have a fucked up imagination and work for free lol but no suggestions for improvements except an indepth discussion over the technical terms 'recession' and 'depression'. Not sure how much panel descriptions to put in so I have left it fairly free for artists interpretation (the old wagner vs moore panel debate lol) so really just needing one scifi fanatic to look over it but I'm sure ill find one x x