Life is riddled with a procession of minor impediments

[The Legendary Shark]

I have to, if only just to say I've done it.

[Roger Godpleton]

A horrendous case of flu coincides with my first incontrovertible nightmare in years as I barely escape some effortlessly inexplicable Evangelion / Inception style metaphysical conflagration.

[staticgirl]

yuk! Get well soon!

[Darren Stephens]

First day off sick in a few years today. Had a cold for a week or so, which seems to have ramped up a gear overnight. Blew my nose yesterday and knackered something in my ear. Very painful indeed....

[lackey]

not good mate. take it easy, and i hope you get better soon!

[Rog69]

I'm sitting here in my dressing gown with a nice glass of red wine, watching the snowflakes drift past my window.

I've just realised that I need to put the wheelie bin out.

Bollocks.

[mogzilla]

decided to go to manchester shopping today for the missusussusues pressie the train was late and the bugger showed up half an hour late...
  then after a peruse in forbidden planet as she didnt know what to get me i got her a "meltdown man" and "al's baby" gns to give me on t'day. also got myself tour of duty cos ive lost me original!?!?!

  then the impediments began. the train home had been cancelled due to both signal failure and a broken track at leyland where i live so havindg a cold i couldnt hear the announcments well as im all bnged up. i asked the customer helpers as there were three fellas having a chat and all i got was " its just said it innit?"  then the train i normally got wasnt stopping at leyland so i thought i would have to get off art chorley and wait half an hour for a bus which would take the same again in this snow to get me home.... then a message flashed up saying the next train would be going to leyland yippee...then i saw the queue.  after much shoving i finally got a seat near the stoned/smacked up pissed scottish irish bolton half chorley lad (he was doing accents all the way home!)going to preston ...finally got home about three hours later than planned  and didnt have time to wrap any of minis pressies and i still have a coule of thing to get missis mogs and me mother.


and the dishwasher handles broke weve not had it a year yet.

[Woolly]

and the dishwasher handles broke weve not had it a year yet.

If it broke due to general usage, you should be able to claim on your manufacturer's warranty 

[Keef Monkey]

The sofas for our new flat were supposed to arrive today, we've been waiting 5 weeks (sitting on bean bags) and were pretty excited when it looked like they were coming in time for xmas.

Excitement squashed when the delivery men arrived, then refused to deliver and left again. They'd come in a 30ft truck and the closest they could park was across the street, which despite being 20ft from my front door wasn't an option because they refused to cross the street with it for 'health and safety reasons'. We live 3 floors up so I suspect that translates to 'lazy fucker reasons'.

Apparently it's my fault for not telling them there might not be 30ft worth of parking space immediately outside the door, but anyone who thinks there's 30ft worth of parking space available anywhere in the center of fucking Glasgow needs to have a long hard look at themselves. Cocks.

Yours truly,
Couchless for Christmas

[TordelBack]

Apparently it's my fault for not telling them there might not be 30ft worth of parking space immediately outside the door

Wait a minute, who anywhere in a city or suburb has 30 feet of parking space outside their door (except those rich gits with 10m long driveways, which are in any event unlikely to be suitable for their reversing purposes)?  That's insane - most planning regs require 1.5-2 car spaces per unit, which is what, 6m/20 feet, assuming they're end to end and not parallel like mine?.  Lazy arse motherfunters.

[strontium71]

Ha exactly the same with my DFS delivery - shoulda seen their faces when they pulled in and I told them I was 3 floors up! My God , you'd think I'd just asked to suck 'em off as a freebie!!

[Keef Monkey]

I know, sadly I couldn't vent too much because the delivery guys just drove straight past without stopping and I didn't want to give the girl in the callcentre an earful as it's not really her fault. Think my girlfriend is calling Next tonight to complain so will see where that gets us.

[COMMANDO FORCES]

I would demand that they get the sack so that their families have a shit Christmas, they falter on the mortgage, they then lose the house, the wife leaves them and takes the children and finally they commit suicide.
Now that might make them think twice, the lazy bastards  

[The Legendary Shark]

Why not come to the Yap Shop to ease your festive frustrations? ;-)

[Keef Monkey]

I would demand that they get the sack so that their families have a shit Christmas, they falter on the mortgage, they then lose the house, the wife leaves them and takes the children and finally they commit suicide.
Now that might make them think twice, the lazy bastards  

Bit extreme maybe, I'd probably settle for a new delivery date and a ten quid gift voucher or something.