Better or worse off than parents?

[Emperor]

[Is it? what are you basing this on?

It's what the papers and social commentators keep telling us all the time.

I'm pretty sure there was a flurry of newspaper articles on this within the last month or so following some report or other.

I think part of the problem is partly down to house prices. My parents' generation got in before they skyrocketed and trying to even get on the property ladder is crippling these days. Friends buying a family home have to sneak into the cheapest areas and are often stuck there because of the debt they've had to take onboard to get there.* So even if they are earning as much as there parents at a similar age, they are generally behind in terms of available wealth.

I also suspect there is a bit of a middle class ceiling - my Dad's great grandparents came over from Ireland on the cattleboat with nothing and have slowly worked their way up the Northern Line from the middle of Liverpool (you can still see the terrace houses my grandad's family lived in next door to each other Bread-style), largely working on the docks. Both my parents were teachers (as were those of a lot of my parents or similar jobs - university lecturers, GPs, etc.), so they were doing well and you'd have to go and work for the banks and become a fat cat

So yeah my folks were better off, especially as there were two of them, but then again they had kids and porn is so much more easily accessible these days So it probably all balances itself out in the big scheme of things.

* This before we take into account divorces - I've just had an update on a friend who rather dropped off the radar a year or so ago. He is now staring down the barrel of a second divorce, leaving behind two houses he's partly paid for, and he has had to move back in with his parents (who had sold up and moved once they're youngest had left, and they now find themselves with the eldest moved back in again).

[Van Dom]

Hmm...interesting one. This time last year I would have said I've done slightly better, in terms of wealth. Own a house (4 bedroom semi with front and back gardens) the same as my parents had and I'm 12 years into a not-murderous 30-year mortgage. Have one more kid than they had at my age and am (was) coping fine with the cost of that. Have a considerable amount of savings (50k approx) in the Credit Union, which is something my parents never had. And I HAD a very well-paid (though highly, HIGHLY stressful to the point where it would frequently induce panic-attacks) job, a lot better paid and high profile than any job my dad ever had. My wife was staying at home minding the kids full time, whereas my mum had to work a bar job to make sure enough money was coming in. But that was all before my company went bust before christmas. Not sure where I stand now really - it kind of is like in the 80s when my dad lost his job and went on the dole for years and years.  However, my career so far, the experience I have etc, give me greater prospects than he ever had so theoretically I SHOULD be able to get myself back into a decent job when i get back to Ireland.

In the meantime, I'm here in Japan trying to get some experience in teaching English, doing a course in IT and Networking, and brushing up on my Japanese skills --- all things that I hope I can make use of in the future career-wise. There is piss-all money coming in right now, although my wife is out job-hunting (no success so far). But by leaving Ireland I was able to scrap all bills and expenses (bar the mortgate/home insurance and life insurance) so we aren't in arrears with anyone. I'm looking at this current period of unemployment as a temporary reprieve from the conventions of society - I mean, fuck it, we only live once, if you can stop and smell the roses for a while, even if it means struggling by on very little money, then why not.

In summary, I'm probably a little bit better off than my parents were in terms of wealth - but only so long as I get back to full-time gainful employment by the end of the year!

HOWEVER - if you were to consider things like HAPPINESS and sheer quality  of life, I would say I am streets ahead. The sad fact of the matter is, things went badly wrong in my parents marriage for a variety of reasons, and by the time I was a teenager they pretty much detested each other. All they ever did was fight, constantly, sometimes violently. They were miserable. They made me and my brother and sister miserable. It was a very unhappy home life for quite a number of years (until they eventually separated). I am very happy to report that no such mal-content exists in my marriage and nor shall one ever (touch wood!). We are quite happy with each other and each others various 'quirks' and have a healthy relationship and outlook on married life. Our kids are happy too,as a result. In that sense, there is no comparison, and even if our  money-situation was to get worse before it gets better, I would still say we are better off. Money isn't everything, after all.

[Mardroid]

Educationally speaking I've done better than my parents. I have a degree, and I don't think either of my parents had any qualifications.

As far as job prospects are concerned, my Dad was a storekeeper in a hospital, and my mother a childminder/housewife. For a bit I was a Software Engineer, so the highest earner in the household. That only lasted 18 months though and I spent a long long time unemployed after that. Now I have part time work as an administrator in a college on minimum wage, so from a financial POV, I'm worse off than them.

On the other hand a career has never really been a big deal for me. I'd like more money, sure, but as long as I can cover my expenses and a bit extra for goodies, I'm fairly happy. It's a bit tight sometimes, but I live at home rent free (I cover the rest of my expenses, food, bills, etc, though) so it's not too bad. I'm well aware that my age with my qualifications I should have come further though and getting my own place (preferably a cottage in the country.) is a nice whimsical dream.

From a relationships point of view my Dad has had two happy marriages. The first marriage was literally 'to death we do part'.  2-3 years later he met someone else and he's been with her for 16 years now and they're still going strong.

I've been single my entire life, but then I kind of grew up in a different situation to my parents. I.e . I think they had a strong community of friends of the same age where relationships blossomed. I have friends growing up too, but we didn't hang around together all that much and girls were mainly distant friends. A few minor crushes, but did nowt about it. (In hindsight, while I have some regrets, I think I was largely right not to act in their particular cases.) And to be honest, I don't get out much and the whole clubbing, bar hopping, 'going out on the pull thing' that most young people got into has always been a bit alien to me.

So all in all I've probably done worse, but it's not like I spend my life depressed. (Reading this post is a bit depressing though. Heh.) Long as I can dip into a good book or comic regularly I'm okay. And it's probably not too late for the other stuff, (although I'd imagine there'll need to be major compromises where finding a partner is concerned, if I even bother) although I'm aware time's fast running out.

[Buttonman]

Von Dom's got £50k! - he should really be buying all subscriptions and art commissions - a bit like that epiosde of 'Men Behaving Badly'.

I'm doing fine. My folks could buy and sell me and often drop me a few quid I don't really need just beacause they can. I've no debts apart from mortgages and a healthy property portfolio which should see me OK in retirement.

I was born in 1971 with my folks both working, Dad an office manager at a fruit importers and my Mum doing nights as a Sister in the hospital theatre. What they instilled in me was a strong work ethic to attain what I wanted without looking for hand outs or going on the rob. Worked so far!

[Van Dom]

Von Dom's got £50k! - he should really be buying all subscriptions and art commissions - a bit like that epiosde of 'Men Behaving Badly'.

Van Dom's also got 4 kids...you think that 50k is gonna last long once they get into their teenage years?!?

[TordelBack]

That's why you should spend it on cool stuff now.  They'll only waste it on faddy crap, or education or something. 

[JamesC]

The thing is, there are so many more outgoings these days if you're to keep what is considered a good standard of living. Most people have a mobile phone and internet contract and many people run one or more cars - far more than did in the past. Even things like freezers and microwaves that were seen as luxury items 25 years ago are now the norm.

To answer the original question, in relative terms I'm probably about even with where my parents were at my age. However, if they were earning the equivalent of what I'm earning now they'd have thought they'd won the lottery - they just had less stuff to spend the money on.

[Tiplodocus]

At my age my Mum and Dad had 10 more kids than I have and they were squeezed into a three bedroom (four if you count the downstairs dining room converted to a bedroom), one bathroom terrace council house.  Mum worked full time on looking after the children and then did part time work on top of that, Dad was out 8 till 6 for the civil service. We never went on foreign holidays and British holidays consisted mostly of staying with relatives. We couldn't even afford to pay for school trips and school days outs. Mum often went ten years between buying a new coat. Though fiscal prudence (and my Dad walking around switching every light and plug socket off the second it was not being used) they never seemed to be in debt but equally never had anything you would consider as disposable income. No savings apart from insurance policies that got cashed in whenever they had to pay for one of my sister's weddings.

We've got five bedrooms, three common rooms and three bathrooms for us and three kids. And about 12 years left on the mortage. Both of us in full time work. Foreign holidays are a pretty regular occurrence and pretty much any gadget we want gets bought. Kids get to go on skiing trips and weekends away with school whenever they come up. Mrs Tips seems to buy a new coat every time she has a night out. (OK, that's not strictly true).  Still skint, right enough. A fair bit of debt other than the mortgage but all seems to be in control (and on the way down).

But then again, they didn't have four FUCKING cats so they win!



(Mrs Tips' upbringing considerably different to mine but I still think she'd consider us better off than her Mum and Dad were at her age).

[Tiplodocus]

Oh and I was born in 64.

[Mikey]

I was born on the mid '70s. I'm definitely better off than me ma ever was, both in monetary and general happiness terms. The recent revelation of me da's collection of vintage motorbikes, held in a garage bigger than many houses (including any I've lived in) at his detached country residence suggests he was doing alright for himself while I couldn't get new shoes growing up. Me bitter? Not much!

I had this conversation with a mate a while ago. He reckoned it was our (well, his considering my own experience) parents generation were the last to 'do better' than their parents, as he grew up middle class and is still there, and also expects his kids to pretty much continue that in their expectations, education, jobs, standard of living etc. It illustrates the reason why I think it's wrong that many people from the 'perpetual middle class', if you will, reckon just having a job makes you working class - if your parents were Doctors, solicitors teachers etc, and you're a Doctor, solicitor, teacher etc, chances are you're not carrying the same baggage. Don't mean to sound off there, but it's a different experience that gives you a different view on things at times.


M.

[Satanist]

Over 10 kids? Fucking hell!

I've got 2 and if the mrs said she was up the duff again I'd need some serious medication to get over it.

Thats why I stick to prostitutes.

[the 'artist' formerly known as Slips]

Interesting little one this

Probably better to compare and contrast me with my father.
I had a better education, went to university done my science degree.  He went to school and failed his 11+ by 1 point, didnt get into Grammar school, so never did a degree.  I like him was a late starter at school, and didnt really come into my own until 14 or 15.  He was the top of his school when he left and did an apprenticeship at the council, becoming an enviromental health officer. 

In the 80's he and my mother should have been relatively well off (especially living on the west coast of scotland), and bought their house but he squandered money on drink, horses and such like.  He was probably a very unhappy man all in all.  He was with my mother for something like 30 years before he passed away.  In fact now, with my fathers pay off and pension rights, my mother has more disposable income than most people I know.  Rather ironically considering we didnt have a penny when I was growing up due to my old man's addictions.  My mother was a ward sister and has her own pension too on top of my fathers.   

Currently Im in a relationship of 20 years. I own 1 house and an appartment by the sea.  But I do scrimp and save a lot we dont really have much disposable income.  Living on the south coast means I pay almost london Prices but without the income really.  Though to be honest as a computer engineer I do earn over average wage, so probably my money stretches further than most.   My wife runs her own company, but I mostly subsidise that due to the economic down turn supplementing her wages as well.  Strangely though I feel I have a lot less time for my children than my parents did with me.  They are teenagers (my daughter is 20 this year) so they will probably want less to do with me as time goes on.

So in a nutshell Im probably worse off financially than my parents and worse off free time wise.  But I probably have a better standard of life than they did, I hope my children had a better standard of life than I did.     

[Devons Daddy]

for the hard work of my parents.
dad Postman, mother part time factory worker.

I am very well paid,travelled the world, live in a rather pleasant house, overall, I am more thanks to the support they gave.

yeh I did alright.i pay less tax then my father ever did also.

[Emperor]

Thats why I stick to prostitutes.

Does the missus not ask why you buy so much superglue?

[Something Fishy]

Born at the start of the 70's and lucky enough to be better off and to have had a better education than my parents.  Mustn't grumble.