Messages

Yeah, I went back and did that afterwards. This playthrough was my 'trying hard to win' one.
It doesn't help in any way to kill him, although it is satisfying.

Yeah. I flicked through and I don't think it's possible to 'save' Foxglove. The best ending she can get is getting the sceptre and taking over the Rift, which is definitely on brand (but also causes you to lose the book). Getting that spider thing off her head at least gives her her own agency back.

Big fan of Foxglove, but also I think there's a lot of redeemed bad guy narrative stuff about, especially if the villain is a bit hot, where within every bad girls heart is a bit of good etc. I quite like Foxglove (and Cassandra) sticking to the darkside.

The stuff at Irsmuncast is great for bringing everything together from previous books. I didn't like Csaky, but really enjoyed having all the advisors back, Lackland showing his true colours etc. And I didn't miss the irony of the imposter being out to kill me because I murdered his grand master in Usurper... a bit of a mirror of my own mission to avenge the grandmaster who was murderd by Yaemon.

The only bits of Bogie Man I've ever read was a little in Toxic. As a kid I didn't appreciate it at the time, but I'm definitely interested in this.

Dreadnoughts & A Very British Affair spoken for, cheers!

An errata to the above - Megatropolis isn't a webshop exclusive, but the standard hardback version. Apologies.

I'm clearing some space at the moment and have a small handful of graphic novels that need new homes, but really aren't worth me listing on ebay.
The below then are FREE if collected from me (near Worcester) or I can meet in Birmingham or Worcester itself. Or, if you're going to Lawless, I can save them and hand them over there!
If anybody further abroad badly wants them and there's no local takers I'll post them but would need postage + a nominal fee for packaging and stuff:

Immortal Hulk Omnibus 1
Complete Ace Trucking Co Vol 2
Complete Indigo Prime
Captain Britain: Before Excalibur
Mach 1 Close Encounters

(not GNs but I've also got a load of Steven Erkison's Malazan books, same applies)

Not going free I have

Dreadnoughts (webshop hardback) - £10 + £4 if posted
Megatropolis (webshop hardback) - £10 + £4 if posted
I've also got a spare copy of Dave Roach's excellent A Very British Affair: The Best of Classic Romance Comics - £20 + £6 postage (it's heavy!)

Here's the rest of my Redeemer writeup.

I think at the time I said what I liked about this book. Typing this lot up, it reinforces how much fun it was. The bit in the Rift is easily the best bit. It does seem, from these notes, like I'm constantly turning a corner and meeting some NPC or another, but that's because I've cut out all the boring bits.
Anyway.

Part 3

So... when I died last time, after setting off for the last of the 4 stooges, I was specifically asked if I'd eliminated Cassandra and having done so led to my death. So this time I restart, follow Cassandra until I meet Thybault but this time do not go after her but instead head into the big prison stalagmite, rescue Glaivas, kill Amin, port out, reunite with Dore and Taflwr etc. I'm convinced Avenger wouldn't leave Eris and Thybault to die, so I still take that route as going after them, and this time we go back down to the seventh level (ffs) to find them and aid them in battle against the dark elves. After Kwons Flail-ing a load of idiots we rescue the besieged pair and fight through spiders, elves and other horrors back up the sixth tier. Good guys reunited! No mention of Cassandra so far (I thought she'd intervene here) so I guess her being dead at this point just closed off going further to avoid timewasting, which is fair enough.

Reaching the sixth level gate, there's a difference of opinion. Dore, as usual, thinks we should just charge in, stating he didn't get down to level six by sneaking about (you did lose a hand though, you dope). Taflwr suggests donning the dark elves gear and passing through in disguise, whilst Glaivas just says I go in alone, ninja-kill the sentries and open the gate. Glaivas has always been helpful and sensible and the other two are clowns, so we go with his plan. The gatehouse is garrisoned by some kind of ant-human hybrids but I'm amongst them like a shadow, killing the lot and getting us through.
More battles await, including a giant tongue and some elves riding huge spiders, and then the Black Widow herself is sighted in pursuit. As we flee headlong we're ambushed by Cassandra, who steps out to block our path. She's badly wounded, but armed with a crossbow whose bolts are tipped with the deadly blood of Nil. With spl;it seconds to act I use my poison needles - as the dart lodges in her face she fires the bow, but with arrow-cutting I knock the deadly missile aside and she collapses into the rocks. There is no time to see if she is finally finished - we need to move and fast. Webbed into a chamber and with Dore covering our retreat, we again encounter Foxglove who again offers to aid us. She claims that with the death of the Keeper she is aiming to assume that position - and perhaps challenge the Widow herself - but she needs the sceptre, both to secure her position and to be free of the Black Widows geas, a curse not even death could free her from.

There's a big choice her and I feel a bit sorry for Foxglove, but I can't give up the sceptre - it's what all the bad guys want to become uber powerful so it seems to be the key object here. I dither and as a sweetener she gives me a silver gauntlet which Dore can wear over his stump to give him a new hand.
Because Eris is with me I have an option to ask for his help, so in a bit of a dick move I ask him to cast an illusion over the torch of lumen so it looks like the sceptre. Foxglove, none the wiser, scoops it up and opens up the way forward for us. "We've both cheated the gods this day" she says, and I admit to feeling a bit guilty for cheating her as we scuttle off.

Things now get a bit weird. We gain the cavern in the Rift thats 'protected by fate' and are enveloped in a sort of warm light which leaves me alone and facing Fortuna, Fates guardian of the Rift. She confirms that I am beyond the reach of the Black Widow, as are my friends, but that we must chase our own fate to leave the Rift. Thus begins a strange dream quest - my ninja skills leave me here, with only my fate modifier remaining. I find myself in a wraithlike landscape of bamboo groves before an edifice of drak crystal. My hands are corpselike and cold as I push through the bamboo, following the sound of a voice chanting the Cachetism of Kwon the Redeemer. I discover a monk, pale and bleeding from a wound, but as I approach him his chant changes in pitch and tone to become one of damnation and evil and I hurry away, crossing blood-soaked rice fields where dozens of damned monks battle each other in endless warfare and following a vision of a  tiger - the symbol of Kwon and surely a good omen - to a dark pagoda where awaits me Aiguchi, the weapon master I encountered back in Usurper. He states he has been called back from the fires of hell to destroy me and avenge his death. Battle is joined: a single hit and Aiguchi dissolves into smoke, the mist coalescing instead into Jikkyu, the Samurai I slew in Assassin, whilst the surroundings transform to that of a battlefield. Once more I fight, and once more upon victory the smoke changes, inevitably, into the form of Yaemon.
Once more we face each other across the windswept ramparts. Yaemon is soaked head to foot in gore: for his failure he has been condemned to a lake of boiling blood for eternal torment, and he seeks to drag me down there with him. We fight and Yaemon absolutely batters me: i need to land three hits on him and with just 5 health left I get the final one: he screams as he is dragged back to his torture in the inferno. The scene shifts again to a simple room, the only evidence of our battle Yaemon's bloodstained footprints upon the floor. Finally I must fight a shadowy image of myself. Here I focus on my training from previous books, leaning into the Way of the Tiger, and the spirit fades away and I return to the real world.

Back in the world, I materialise in a circular chamber, without exit and lit by a glowing orb. Dore and Glaivas appear beside me - they too have conquered their fates, although the others are seemingly lost. Randomly we then have to fight a giant brain, that turns into a giant maggot: the final avatar of Vile sent to block our escape. This is another fairly involved fight, and a pretty squishy one including a bit where I use arrow cutting to catch a smaller giant maggot that's been launched at my face, but the three of us slay the thing. There follows a brief glimpse of heaven, before the chamber fades and I find myself finally upon the surface.

Squinting against the sunlight I realise I am near Irsmuncast, at the battlefield where I routed the Legion of the Sword of Doom. No sign of Dore and Glaivas! My only choice is to head back to the city, several days travel on foot, subsiding on apples and water from streams. Upon arriving I choose to don the garb of a commoner, entering the city humble and barefoot as I did the first time I came here. Feeling grateful to Kwon I head to his temple first rather than stroll up to my palace, where the monks seem agitated to see me. Hengist, the new grandmaster, is not here: he went on a visit to the temple of time but has not returned, and the monks speak of the Overlord (me) who has already returned and warned of 'an imposter' that may come into the city. I show him the sceptre, and walk around the room calling the monks by name, for many of them were trained by me. With my identity confirmed I am able to rest until another old friend arrives: Greystaff from the Temple of Avatar. The priest heals me before performing holy rites to rid me of the taint of Nullaq that I've carried for several books (restoring my inner force and boosting my endurance to beyond its old maximum) and then finally pouring the holy water of Avatar into my ear to drive out the brain spider I still carry. I'm back baby!



I reconvene with Greystaff and my other old chum Demagogue, who has also arrived, to discuss recent happenings in the city. It seems not long after I left "I" returned and sequestered myself in the palace 'in mourning' for my lost friends. Shortly after I mobilised my army - both Shieldmaidens and the regular troops of Nemesis - and sent them off to attack The Rift leaving the city almost undefended. Gwyneth has not been seen since 'my' return, and both Greystaff and Demagogue have been denied entrance to the palace. Antocidas and his mercenaries are lying low assessing the situation, in the Temple of Nemeisis Lackland has ignored entreaties, and Hengist visited the Temple of Time to discuss an alliance against these strange happenings and has not returned. Greystaff and Demagogue will rally to my command but against the remaining combined forces of Dama, Nemesis and Time, we would surely lose in a bloodbath.
It looks like it's up to me to rally everyone once more. I head first to the Temple of Dama in disguise but find the doors barred to me and Gwyneth not in attendance. Next I go to see Antocidas, who greets me with his typical surly manner. He seems distrustful, claiming it is I who may be the imposter. I remind him of the battle we won together against Honoric, and eventually he asks how I escaped the Rift. I tell him the truth, preposterous as it sounds ("Oh, I was teleported out by the goddess of Fate") and he says this must surely be a lie... had he not already heard the same story from a trusted source... Glaivas! The ranger enters, having reached the city ahead of me. We reunite warmly; Antocidas takes the knee and pledges his men and his sword to my cause. Now it's off to the Temple of Time to meet Solstice. I still really hate this guy. He tells me Hengist was wounded by an assassin and is recuperating slowly in this temple because 'time is the greatest healer'. True to form he offers no help at all and I leave in failure.
Back at Kwons Temple, I learn Dore too has returned and of course has been captured and is lined up for execution this very eve. Greystaff and Demagogue introduce me to Csaky, who is also a ninja of Kwon and coincidentally my cousin. I'm not 100% sold on Csaky - she just turns up at this point and seems a bit too awesome and convenient (I wouldn't be surprised if she is there to be the character in a future series that never happened) but she is legit and she also knows a way into the palace. With Antocidas and Glaivas providing a distraction we slip over the wall, through some secret doors and into the servants quarters and finally the dungeons where Dore is held (Csaky has done all the work here btw, I just follow her about)
Dore is in some half-flooded dungeons and as I'm busting her out, in an unexpected twist the gauntlet / magic hand Foxglove gave him suddenly comes to life and attacks him, eventually being severed and dropped into the water where it forms a whirlpool where some horrible thing bursts out of it, like a skinless cyclopean tentacle monster. I put it down and am cursing Foxglove for this final trap, yet Csaky and Dore seem to think this was a ploy of the priests of Nemesis. Dore is also basically dead, so I charge Csaky to get him out and proceed alone, as it should be, to confront the usurper.

At the throne room door Gwyneth stands guard. She knows me not, and draws her sword against me: I tell her exactly what I said when I first came to the city (that I intend to rule according to the laws of my father) and realising who I am, she steps down - but will not aid me against what is within. Finally, I enter the darkened throne room where a brooding figure awaits me. He is the exact image of myself, but as I approach he shifts and the illusion fades revealing a scowling one-eyed figure. He tells me his story - he is a ninja of the way of the scorpion, a man who was present when I slew the Grandmaster and who was chosen to carry forth the orders revenge - as they said they would, all the way back in Usurper. He reveals that, upon the death of Mandrake his belt of disguise was stolen by the treacherous Lackland and gifted to him (hence the disguise) along with his fearsome blade that kills with a single blow. Flipping Lackland! I always knew he was the bad apple!

Obviously we must fight. I dazzle my foe with flash powder and whilst he is distracted launch into the teeth of the tiger throw, following up with kwons flail and expend my inner force as I do so for an enormous, near fatal blow. A single kick fells him and the imposter falls dead my feet. The crown of Irsmuncast rolls from his head to land fittingly at my feet.
All is resolved - or is it? With a crash the gaunt figure of Lackland bursts into the room, his priests and a force of half orcs at his back. With shock he takes in the fallen body of the imposter, the crown upon my brow, the shattered halves of Mandrakes sword. The game is up. With a cry he urges his men forward, plunging the throne room into a deadly melee as Gwyneth and her swordmaidens surge to my defense. For a priest Lackland is a fearsome enemy who puts out some appalling damage and although I am victorious I am left on 2 health.

Lackland lies dead, his priests under arrest, and Antocidas has rallied the army to my cause: order is restored. As Gwyneth, Dore, Csaky and Glaivas join me I look out over the city and resolve to watch over its people as Kwon has watched over me. My journey, at last, is over.

WotT rules!

I've recently re-read that era of Progs and what Alex says is sage as ever - the first bit of Medivac is good but it kind of loses momentum and tails off. Chronos is absolutely appalling and a real waste of Ron Smith.

Zippy is a more interesting one - it's so often cited in revisionist takes on the Prog that I thought it'd be this hidden gem, but a lot of it is pretty poor - I'm thinking about the doughnut storyline especially. Lovely artwork and a really good idea that starts off brightly and I think would have a lot more legs today - the cat, especially, rules. For all my criticism I would like to see it reprinted and I think it would be a really good shout for a reprint if it could tie into Regened or something.
I think Survivor is the best of her work in the Prog and I wish there'd been more of that.

If we're not careful we could end up with Jareth, the Goblin King. There's a future I'd rather not think about.

I quite fancy King from the videogame Tekken. He became a wrestler to support an orphanage! But surely The Lion King is the most apt for England, plus he might eat Suella Braverman.

That Ladyhawke stuff is awesome. Out of my budget unfortunately, but good to see the auction going in that direction!

I also like it when we get some differing opinions here - if anything we don't get quite as much debate as I'd like on the Prog thread tbh! I'm also in a couple of groups for music things where there's very little critical analysis of stuff and things are either a huge love-in, or everything gets slagged off. The different views on here is one of the things I like here: as an anthology I never expect to like 100% of the Prog and I never read someones opinion that's not the same as mine and think 'oh, that's wrong' - in fact I'm really interested if they say why they like something I didn't, because it encourages me to go back and look at it with a fresh perspective.

It's quite cool to read a positive opinion on Joe Pineapples, because the almost overwhelmingly negative response it had here was a bit uncomfortable. It really wasn't for me, but I'm glad someone was digging it.

[Dredd]

Anyway, I got this Prog Saturday and just want to say what a glorious treat that was to start my weekend with.

On the Prog itself:

Dredd this isn't my favourite recent Dredd tale but there's nothing wrong with it at all. Next episode needs an explanation rather than more pages of business dudes killing each other. I really liked the opening page, and the accounts judge being in a firefight as part of his audit. The axe murderer dude, despite looking more like a 'classic' MC1 weirdo, looks a bit out of place here which is ironic given some of us have been moaning everyone looks too contemporary.

The Out Absolutely beautiful episode, big plot advance, really loving this. Not as bothered as perhaps I should be by the final page?

Future Shock Really nicely done FS. Cool stuff.

The Order It all seems to be moving a bit quickly now doesn't it? I'm usually alright with following The Order but the last couple of epsiodes are moving at such a clip I'm starting to lose it a bit and I admit I'm a bit confused about The Shadows and liked it better when it was all wurms. Good to see Bacon again as I feel we've spent ages with Belair and not enough time with the other, better characters. That panel with the severed head is the first time in ages I've seen a frame in the Prog and recoiled slightly - horrible (excellent) work!

Proteus Vex Just amazing!

I'm glad I'm not the only one who saw the 'StarWarsness' of this cover. Cyd looks very Carrie Fisher-esque here as well - I wouldn't be surprised if she was the reference here. I've thought this series of The Out has Cyd looking a lot more photo reference-y (if that makes sense) at times tbh.

At the risk of incurring the wrath of the forum, especially considering the last cheese related outrage in these parts, what about Cheddars?

Hmm. I always thought these were crackers. Whilst tasty, I'm not sure a savoury 'biscuit' really fits the criteria.

All this talk of marshmallow in a biscuit reminds me Jam Mallows - a flat biscuit with two rows of coconut-covered marshmallow and some jam. Always a prize if scrounged from a plate of biscuits at an elderly relatives, I've not had one for years; they look a bit revolting now.

Yeah, part of the reason I've not started Crypt is that I remember it not being fun at all...
Redeemer on the other hand is great. I really recommend it, although you do have to endure the rubbish that is Inferno.

Here's Redeemer part 2!


Eris having been a classic Mungo, I restart and this time decide to follow Cassandra, who promptly kills me and gouges my emerald eye out. Not having that, so I reroll my missed attack, throw her across the cavern, and we eventually decide on a truce - at least until we reach an upper level. We head on together, not really trusting another, until we encounter a hooded figure in velvet ribes who turns out to be none other than.... Foxglove.
"I've been waiting for you" Foxglove says, stepping aside to reveal the twisted corpse of the creature that dragged her from the Black Widows chamber. She too suggest we join forces to escape - but first she wants to deal with Cassandra, as she has a score to settle there (as well as her general homicidalness, it was Cassandra who delivered Foxglove to me in Inferno and suggested I kill ger off). Cassandra warns me that somethings not right - Foxglove was always pretty weedy and lacked the skill to fight her own way free of the creatures of Nullaq, and says that she is my only hope to find Glaivas.
Finally there's a chance to utilise my little-used skill of Shin-Ren here which tells me something is off about Foxglove - her mannerisms and movements are strangely hollow. I've grown quite fond of Foxglove over the books but the is something wroing here so I move to stand with Cassandra. As I do Foxglove speaks aloud in a language I do not know, and to my horror what I thought was bioluminescent moss is revealed to be thousand of tiny spiders that surge towards us. As we scramble for higher ground Cassandra punches Foxglove and it is revealed that she has some kind of awful swollen spider attached to the back of her head, and as it flexes and takes full control of her her eyes go blank and her skin takes on a corpselike pallor. I splatter the spider with my sceptre and poor Foxglove collapses like an abandoned puppet into the carpet of spiders as Cassandra and I pull ourselves to safety into a cavern above.

After more wandering we come upon a pungent lake of sulphuric acid and we need each others help to proceed. Once again I am given the option to use Shin-Ren, this time to read Cassandra: she wishes me harm (of course) but is also telling me the truth about knowing how to reach Glaivas. I elect to stick with her, although she makes sure I am to go first into any hazards. In one cavern we find the remains of long dead warrior, their holy sword and symbol all that remains of them. This is, of course, another reference to Talisman of Death - it's the shieldmaiden, I think, who was killed defending the others.
We battle some kind of albino fiend, which very nearly kills me with my reduced kick attacks, and after reunite with Thybault the priest, who has become separated from Taflwr. At this point Cassandra attacks and departs - there is enmity between her and the holy man and the odds are no longer in her favour for killing me - and Thybault and I head off after her after he heals my injuries somewhat. We come across Cassandra crossing a classic jungle canyon rope bridge over a vast chasm. There is a confrontation, ending in me using a shuriken to cut the rope and drop her to her death.
With Cassandra dealt with we head to the Forbidden Sanctuary where Thybault wanders off again to look for Eris (these guys are idiots) and I proceed much as I did in gaining entry to the stalagmite and encountering the keeper, only this time I tell her to get Glaivas out of the cell instead of heading in myself. As she does so, to my absolute horror, another one of those brain spiders wriggles out of Glaivas's ear and jumps at me. I've got arrow cutting so I deflect the strike and crush it, but if I didn't this spider would have burrowed into my skull, joined the other one living in my cranial cavity and the two would EAT MY FUCKING BRAIN OH MY GOD.
Sneering, the Keeper reveals an image of the Black Widow wrapping her webbing around the outside of the stalagmite, trapping us in. Meanwhile Glaivas is starting to come round from his spider-possession. He's in a bad way, but handing him the paladins sword peps him up somewhat. He goes after the Keeper who transforms into a spider and sets off her final trap. One of the other cells open and another masked warrior steps out. He introduces himself as Amin the Fidai, a fanatical sect of assassins. He was brought here when Glaivas was captured and placed in the next cell where he has been meditating and preparing himself for the honour of killing me - for he specialises in defeating the monks of Kwon in battle.
What follows is another one of those cinematic battles that WotT is famous for... It's not quite as epic as previous books, but eventually I defeat Amin (Kwons Flail helps, as he is useless against it). With Amin lifeless and Glaivas having stomped the spider-keeper the rest of the cells open revealing the prisoners within, held in a sort of stasis. I free one fellow but he immediately dies as spiders spill from his head - the awful things were slowly eating his brain from the inside. The second prisoner is the wizard from Talisman of Death, recognisable in his golden robes the golden smiling mask. He is grateful but also dying - he reveals he was poisoned before being frozen, to allow his agonizing death to take years rather than minutes, as punishment for stealing the talisman. He speaks of a chamber dedicated to Fate, who sent he and his friends her all that time ago, and essentially makes the same offer to us as he did in ToD - to teleport us away from here, but to do so he will need to draw the power of the torch of Lumen. To be honest it's a no-brainer so I hand over the torch and with his dying efforts he zaps Glaivas and I out of there.

We're still in the Rift however, and the pursuit is on. Without the torch our only light is Glaivas's sword. More harrowing escapades follow until we wind up rescuing Taflwr and the long-missing Dore, who has lost a hand in battle. It seems Taflwr was rescued by Dore, who presumably has been charging around the Rift all this time, and then used his magic to find Glaivas hence our running into them. At this point we seem primed to escape, but Taflwr obviously wants to find Eris and Thybault. I don't want to leave anyone behind, so the three of us head off but this the wrong decision as although we reunite with the others we are overwhelmed and killed by the Black Widow shortly afterwards. Game over again.

Final part to come!

[cake]

Is a Tunnocks teacake a biscuit? A) legally, B) taxwise, and C) scientifically?

Asking for a friend.

Clue's in the name there, surely!

I adore Tunnocks teacakes. Way superior to a wagon wheel. My Mum used to send them to me when I was at university as they were so light, so the postage cost less. That essentially meant I used to live off Tunnocks teacakes.