Competition: Kill Judge Dredd!

[thrillpowerseeker]

I see it now..Dredd in pursuit of ape gang hoods in Apetown has found himself cornered by simian ne'r do wells(some in hats)..he fries 8 with incendiaries then the Lawgiver mk 7 explodes taking his right hand with it..'Ouch that smarts' says Dredd or words to that effect..Joe pulls out a vintage snarl and stays the chimps for an instant ..its enough...a passing Bat glider seeing the unholy predicament throws Dredd a line ..Joe grasps at it...with his RIGHT hand..'Drokking Hell' as he realises years of treading the pedways of the Big meg have slowed his reflexes..its too late..Don Uggie Rennilino is on his back and is followed by his Knuckle dragging co-horts..there after the helmet ..twisting, turning,tugging at poor Joes neck from breakfast to bedtime..years of Helmet Removal Refusal (HRR) have led to  Dredds head and Helmet to be bio-grafted together..the hairy hoods now in a banana hooch induced frenzy have by now de-limbed MC1's finest but the Helmet remains defiant..Dredd not enjoying this too much summons his errant arms and legs (by hitherto undiscovered Psi-powers) to attack the assailants...there doing a good job ..apes fly left apes fly right when over the horizon appears an indistinct figure at first...Dredd squints at the would be rescuer..'Walter????  is that you?'...'have no fear Judge Dwedd, for Walter will save you from these howwid gwunting wascals'...but whats this?..Walter hasnt seen the Blood and the banana hooch on the floor...he wealises..sorry realizes too late ...................................SKIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD..SCLLLLLLLLLLUUUSSSSHHHHH....KLUNKKKKKKKK..Walter picks himself up and turns around to see Dredds limbless torso spouting an arc of blood into the air like some kind of Rhesus rainbow..then he notices Dredds Helmeted head come to a stop at his feet..stooping down to pick up his one time masters bonce he sees Dredds almost Bionic swede struggle to mouth the words.........'Tell Vienna she can have my spare Kneepads'

[Krustabi]

Psycho Pat Mills cultists arrange for fatal "accidents" to happen to all the major Dredd writers, leaving their master as default keywriter.

Cue invasion of Mega-city one of All of Mills's characters, who arrive through a combination of both Kahos and Dark Matter. The Judges are wiped out (They didn't think it to many) and the comic is renamed Millsthousand AD. Issue one's cover is a photo of Pat standing atop the dead bodies of everyone involved in the writing, illustration &commissioning of Satanus Unchained.

Tagline: "DON'T FUCK WITH ME"...

[petemaskreplica]

The installation in the Grand Hall of Justice of the Joseph Dredd memorial stairlift serves as a stern reminder that most accidents occur in the home, and that such basic domestic devices as stairs pose a potentially fatal danger to the elderly and infirm.

[Oddboy]

More deaths occur in the home in MC1 - what with everyone having servo-robots which go psychotic every now and then killing "the fleshy ones".

[Quirkafleeg]

Satanus Returns and buggers him death!

[Jared Katooie]

Dredd gets old and tired.

Everyone lets him away with his faltering judgement and slowing reflexes.

After a bad judgement call leaves Dredd wounded his faith in his abilities is permanantly shaken.

In the end he feels that a judge with emotions has no place on the streets and retires.

He refuses to teach at the academy and instead takes the long walk into the cursed earth.

Rico takes over and the bloodline lives on.

[Mr C]

What? Dredd's death? Who told you I was there? Oh she did did she? Well, buy me a Gila-bite and mauve and I'll tell you the story.
Thanks-*slurp*
Yeah, I was there at Lee Marvin block that day.
What? Nah, didn't see Dredd's death. Robots? What robots, didn't see no psycho robot army. The Dark Judges? Nope. Psi Judge Anderson's last battle with death? nope. Clones? What clones? Didn't see Dolman's sacrifice. Or Dredd's famous "Last Judgement" on all the bad guys before going down, taking his helmet off and taking one last look at the city before slipping away, clutching the badge.
What was I doing there?
Well, I was trying to listen to what those two strangers were saying. Didn't see them? Well, I did.
There was a tall one, Cal-Hab accent, an' a short one, moustache, glasses, dressed as a matador, sounded like he was from down Mex way. What were they doing? Talking, just talking.
Real weird, all I could make out was the tall one saying "Told you we shouldn't have used that fucking pirate."

[Krustabi]

Wagner makes a typo and Dreddis bizarrly killed in the middle of the story...

[Krustabi]

A Justice Department expeditionary force finds ancient vid-slugs of the original Judges. it turns out that they were actually a spoilt bunch of rich Ivy League frat boys in the 1980's, with the assertion that "We built this city on Rock and Roll". Chief Judge Hershey orders clones of Van Halen,& various other 80's hair metal bands and MC-1 is overtaken by one huge toga party. Dredd sees that he has no place in this world and takes the Long Walk to die...

[thrillpowerseeker]

or get this...we all know Joe never married right?..its so obvious he was a homosexual..Gordon Rennie 'outed' him in prog 2148 and next ish was beaten to death by evil nazis whilst wearing his favourite lace collared frock..dying words were 'oohh no not the face, that new lippy cost me 200 creds'

[Banners]

100 words exactly...

---

It had never about opinions before, just that single absolute branded "justice". It had always been about right and wrong. Now, it was just right - their right.

The bulkhead of the crowd easily broke through the impotent cordon of now-surplus Judges, reclaiming Justice Department HQ, their city, and their lives. On the steps outside, Dredd saw his comrades fall, and the unfamiliar look on their assailants' faces.

Ignored and unecessary, he fell ? in slow motion. This mighty icon of rule was rendered irrelevant - by a bunch of spotty juves who whacked placards into his face, that simply read "Freedom".

---

M@

[Banners]

101 if you correct the typo. D'oh...!

---

It had never been about opinions before...

---

M@

[Dudley]

100 words exactly, and this is SO the "right" answer:


Walking along a deserted street, Dredd is surprised to see a dimensional rupture open before him.  But not as surprised as he is to see an older Joe Dredd step out of it.

The newcomer?s voice is bitter.  He tells Dredd that some years in the future his actions will lead to the death of billions.  The only way to make amends was to travel back in time and kill himself before it happens.

Before he can finish, Dredd shoots him.

Reporting on the incident to Hershey later, he comments: ?Guess I finally came up against someone I couldn?t beat?...

[jettyboy]

holy grud...
that hurt...
where in drokks name did that come from...
must be getting old....
getting slower...
he was no more than an eldster...
bloody fast though...
where is he...
THROUGH THE SMOKE AN IMAGE CAN BE SEEN
TALL. STERN. DANGEROUS.ARMED...AND POINTING
DREDD SCRAPES AROUND IN THE RUBBLE FOR HIS LAWGIVER
bloody time machine has scrambled my brains...
cant focus...
got it..now where the hell is he...
A SHOT HITS DREDD FULL ON HIS VISOR
SANPS HIS HEAD AROUND LIKE A DOLL
NECK ALMOST BROKEN
b*****d....
DREDD FELLS A PRESENCE STANDING OVER HIM
A COLD METAL SHAFT IS FORCED INTO HIS NECK
uugghh...
AS DREDD FORCES HIS SHATTERED HAND UPWARDS
HE USES BOTH HANDS TO SQUEEZE THE TRIGGER
HE CATCHES A BRIEF GLIMPSE OF GLINTING METAL
AND THE LETTERS ...GO
HOURS/DAYS/MINUTES? LATER DREDD OPENS HIS EYES
alive, drokk im still alive...
HIS EYES BEGIN TO CLEAR AND HE SEES A SHAPE LYING NEXT TO HIM
TRYING TO FOCUS HE BECOMES AWARE OF A FAMILIAR SHAPE
it's not possible...
HIS EYES WIDEN.THE OBJECT IS UNMISTAKABLE
HE CRIES......
Nnoooooooooooooooo.........
THE FIRST THREE LETTERS BECOME CLEARER



FAR..!

[Trout]

Fantastic stuff!

Byron Virgo and I will decide the winner around the middle of next week.

More killing please, everyone!

- Trout