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General Chat => Off Topic => Topic started by: Buddy on 18 December, 2005, 01:04:03 AM

Title: Work Christmas do's......
Post by: Buddy on 18 December, 2005, 01:04:03 AM
Made a tit of myself, again.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's.........
Post by: The Amstor Computer on 18 December, 2005, 01:12:06 AM
C'mon, tell us how - did you admit to not watching any of the first series of Doctor Who?

;-)
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's............
Post by: opaque on 18 December, 2005, 01:43:56 AM
I've just been copying the video of the party this afternoon :)
CBU X Factor was a great sucess.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Richmond Clements on 18 December, 2005, 06:13:49 PM
Mine is next Friday, but I'm leaving afer the meal, so as to avoid making a fool of myself/ferrying drunk people between bars/seeing everyone fight with each other.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: monty-- on 19 December, 2005, 12:21:03 AM
That's the POINT! Do's are to let your hair down and show everyone you're not this uppity person who sit's behind a desk or whatever. I absolutely loathe and despise people who talk about work at do's. Easy. Don't f****** go if you're going to do that.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Dudley on 19 December, 2005, 12:24:31 AM
I'm looking forward to my works do.

Alone, in a room, with a bottle of cheap whisky.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: monty-- on 19 December, 2005, 12:31:55 AM
I'd rather be alone in my room than with a load of tossers talking about work. Ah, it's just you and me now, bottle of Whiskey..
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Matt Timson on 19 December, 2005, 01:16:35 AM
Just like every other Friday night then, eh Duds?

;)
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Dudley on 19 December, 2005, 01:36:16 AM
Nah - usually it's a 2-litre plastic jug of sweet sherry (?2.95 down the local supermarket, or ?2.75 if you bring the jug back).
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Matt Timson on 19 December, 2005, 02:32:29 AM
I once remember 'celebrating' with a 3 litre bottle of 'Turbo Cider'.

It was fucking horrible.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Queen Firey-Bou on 19 December, 2005, 02:33:22 AM
mine ( brigade ) was last night.

it was a bit crap in that the meal was at the hotel i work at, so i had to peel all the effing spuds & set tables & then go in today to tidy it up etc..

however it was great fun, food got thrown & the wrong partners were kissing people but this year it was all harmonious & group huggy bad behavior rather than the impending divorce hell of last year.

i also won a sack of potatoes in our raffle. oh yes, laugh gods of kharmic drudgery while you may !

i'd attach photos, but for some reason, theyre very blurry... shame as i'm sure a handsom man in a kilt kept exposing himself, as one does.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: The Enigmatic Dr X on 19 December, 2005, 03:14:59 AM
My work, for no obvious reason, has the do on a school night.

After my first one I made it in to work, but we were locked out (no one took their keys home!). I promptly passed out, scarring myself for life when my glasses cut me (through the eyebrow, thankfully)and then was taken to hospital.

Thankfully, a partner broke my fall.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Trout on 19 December, 2005, 05:16:26 AM
Mine was yesterday, and was a Bloody Good Do.

As we're all night workers, for some reason the tradition is to make it an all-day piss-up.

We started with a splendid lunch (including delicious white chocolate cheesecake... mmmmmm...) and proceeded to get utterly pissed all day.

No-one really made a fool of themselves, although there's been some minor sniggering about how drunk various people were.

I was slavering a load of shite when the wife collected me at 11 o'clock, but I was a happy drunk.

It was all terribly friendly and good-natured, and VERY different from my previous experiences as a reporter!

I don't even have much of a hangover, having stuck to beer.

Cheers!

- Trout
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: House of Usher on 19 December, 2005, 04:39:39 PM
GC and I went out on 2 works Christmas dos last week. The first was on Monday, and 16 of us went to an Italian restaurant, followed by a couple of bars. The idea after the first bar was to go to an eighties disco, but because two of the lads (yes, including GC) were wearing shitey trainers (I'm so ashamed...), we weren't allowed in, so they dragged us into somewhere really, really awful: a grab-a-granny pick-up joint that played only party music (Come On Eileen, I'm In The Mood For Dancing by the Nolan Sisters, Everybody Was Kung-Fu Fighting, It's Raining Men); a bit like a wedding reception with none of the atmosphere. The average age of the punters was 45, and there were 3 ugly blokes to every rough-looking woman. No-one embarrassed themselves, but aside from the company I came with I can't say I was really enjoying myself, being unable to engage the "this it's so shit it's actually quite good" mood.

Friday we went and had drinks for a mate passing his exam, before going to our big departmental Christmas party. That could have been worse. My main gripe was that the lager had entirely run out by 5 0'clock and I was reduced to drinking bitter - funnily enough, there were still about 20 cans of that left. The cider had all gone by the time I got there. I think the secretaries saw that lot off. If I got my fiver's worth, it wasn't through the amount of alcohol I managed to consume, that's for sure. Nor did I get my money's worth purely through seeing the most drunk and aggressive of the secretaries dancing on top of the furniture.

About 7pm everyone else went off to get food, and I met up with staff from Forbidden Planet and their mates and stayed in the pub with them until gone eleven, and heard some great stories.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Bico on 19 December, 2005, 04:57:43 PM
I've just realised that even though it means having little or no cash, it's great being unemployed around christmas, as I don't have to listen to the same old bollocks for hours on end as my old boss gets drunk on two pints of shandy, then spends the rest of the evening dragging us around the pubs in the town that he has some sort of family or business interest in - tellingly, they're the biggest shiteholes in the town.
Mind you, that's always assuming it went ahead, as he usually tries to get the works do put back so it doesn't clash with his golf.  Last year, he kept putting it back until no-one could make it to the date he finally settled on.
This year, I will be giving my bollocks a nice long scrath, followed by a short snooze, and then I'll bugger off out to the pub with someone I can actually stand to be around for more than five minutes without having to pretend I'm drunk so I can call him a cunt to his face.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Buddy on 21 December, 2005, 12:13:26 AM
Well, as usual alcohol played a big part the evening, that and my novilty chirstmas mistletoe belt buckle.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: judge dreddd on 21 December, 2005, 06:03:17 PM
I made a tit of myself lastyear, will be respectable this year, for balance.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Noisybast on 22 December, 2005, 02:36:56 AM
"novilty chirstmas mistletoe belt buckle"

Oh dear. Do tell...
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Queen Firey-Bou on 22 December, 2005, 03:11:46 AM
"novilty chirstmas mistletoe belt buckle"

oh my god, thats just the sort of stunt that would automatically send me to the other side of the room & ignoring you, & avoiding eye contact !

subtlety umpty !  we girls like subtlety.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: The Amstor Computer on 22 December, 2005, 04:10:46 PM
I'm off to my works do today. I've been told I should wear something "tinselly", and there seems to be some kind of pre-dinner drinks thing involving a cocktail called a "Sloegasm". I got odd looks when I turned down the offer of booze because I don't drink, and I suspect I've incurred the wrath of the staff at the place we're going by being the only vegetarian out of 20-odd guests.

I'm also pretty sure I'm going to be sat at a table with the loopy secretary who thinks a gift shop in Dingwall stole, killed & stuffed her cat, then displayed it in their window.

I'm in hell...

:-(
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: The Amstor Computer on 23 December, 2005, 02:04:46 AM
...um.

Got back from the do a couple of hours ago. Nothing too dramatic happened - and I managed to avoid the mad secretary - but it was about as much fun as I'd imagined. Lots of irritating conversations about civil partnerships -- bigotry alert! -- crap jokes, social awkwardness and endless "why are you a vegetarian/teetotaller" questions every time someone realised I wasn't guzzling turkey & swilling it down with wine.

...oh, and we had a Secret Santa - I got a packet of wet wipes for computer screens. Wouldn't have been too bad, except that every bugger in the place kept on asking what I got, then guffawing loudly when I showed them...
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: opaque on 23 December, 2005, 04:17:58 AM
Unlucky. I've obviously done well.
Big party with our version of X Factor last thursday with some lovely ladies, lots of food (ok I did all the orgnising but it was great fun), then a meal at a hotel this tuesday and a very sucessful mulled wine and mince pies break this afternoon followed by leaving early :)
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Quirkafleeg on 23 December, 2005, 05:04:36 PM
"vegetarian/teetotaller"... blimey it's a good job you've got comics.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: The Amstor Computer on 23 December, 2005, 07:57:44 PM
Heh...

:-)
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Queen Firey-Bou on 24 December, 2005, 05:29:15 AM
heh, i tried to fall off the teetotal wagon, but its very hard to allow yourself to become a drooling pratt like everyone else, even after a few drinks i still wasnt inclined to fall over or grope people.. sheesh, i tried.

we always have jokey presents, every bloody year i get the most wierdest un-funniest stupid presents for a single person,  a cage to keep your favorite willie in ?, a magic globe that tells you what position to try next ?  zzzzzzzzz

still my ex boss got a 'DIY blow job kit' how we all laughed, it didnt include wet wipes tho.
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: Buddy on 24 December, 2005, 05:14:09 PM
The buckle thing was a joke by the way... but I did make a tit of meself, oh dear... the booze!
Title: Re: Work Christmas do's..............
Post by: judge dreddd on 26 December, 2005, 06:25:32 PM
I was 'mainly' respectable and danced around with a bunch of girls doing 'YMCA' etc. etc. tee hee