I hope you'll all be having your haggis, neeps and tatties tonight along with a wee dram (or two)
Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o' the pudding-race!
Aboon them a' yet tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o'a grace
As lang's my arm.
The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hurdies like a distant hill,
Your pin was help to mend a mill
In time o'need,
While thro' your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.
His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An' cut you up wi' ready sleight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like ony ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin', rich!
Then, horn for horn, they stretch an' strive:
Deil tak the hindmost! on they drive,
Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyve
Are bent like drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
Bethankit! hums.
Is there that owre his French ragout
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad make her spew
Wi' perfect sconner,
Looks down wi' sneering, scornfu' view
On sic a dinner?
Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckles as wither'd rash,
His spindle shank, a guid whip-lash;
His nieve a nit;
Thro' blody flood or field to dash,
O how unfit!
But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread.
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He'll mak it whissle;
An' legs an' arms, an' hands will sned,
Like taps o' trissle.
Ye Pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o' fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer
Gie her a haggis!
sadly due to nasty bug i think i shall be forgoing the veggie haggis & whiskey in favor of watery soup.
have a great one everyone tho' yeah for rabbie !
Aye, and I still say he could take Shakespeare!!
Link: The A-Z of Cal-Hab
Anyone remember the following line:
"Burns? I'll gie you burns" followed by much conflagration and burny death, possibly in Mega City One? Think it was mid Eighties Dredd?
It wisnae Dreed, it wis in Anderson PSI. It was part of an evil Sov plot orcastrated by the evil Orlock.
Link: The A-X of Cal-Hab
aaaah right. Cheers Middenface!
Suffice to say, my haggis was trully splendind and was complimented perfectly by my neeps and my tatties. Oh and of course just a small dram
A bit late, and apologies if you've all heard it before:
Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness and greets one. The
patient replies:
"Fair fa your honest sonsie face,
Great chieftain o' the puddin race,
Aboon them a you take your place,
Painch, tripe or thairm,
As langs my airm."
Blair is confused, so he just grins his grin and moves on to the next patient. The patient responds:
"Some hae meat and canna eat,
And some wad eat that want it,
But we hae meat and we can eat,
So let the Lord be thankit."
Even more confused, and his grin now rictus-like, the PM moves on to the next patient who immediately begins to chant:
"We sleekit, cowerin, timrous beasty,
Thou needna start awa sae hastie,
Wi bickering brattle."
Now seriously troubled, Blair turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "What kind of facility is this? A mental ward?" "No", replies the doctor
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Wait for it...
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"This is the serious Burns unit."
Nigel
LOL !!!