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Don't forget, going on sale at 9am sharp!  Be quick or miss out!

Well I'm still awake.  Have been and walked round the whole of Durham.  Have went out and bought this weeks tooth, read it.  I have a free afternoon, so hopefully be able to catch up on a few z's before 9am tomorrow!

Oh well of to lectures I go, will have to try and catch some sleep later.

If only it were so easy!

Help!  I have now been awake for over 24 hours!  Anyone got any good insomnia cures?

Well folks it's that time of year again and you local demon poultry must go and do his exams.  This may in fact lead to a reduced service on all your demonic needs, please bear with us at the important time and normal service will be resumed as soon as possible.

Now no kids!  Let's all play nicely together now!

Well I thought it was bloody good!  Anyone else bother to watch it?

Geraniums: Are they as safe as you think?
A Public Information Essay

   Little is known about the precise origin of geraniums.  The many theories are far ranging from the bastard offspring of a mutant spacegoat through to a thousand- is not million- year old evolution via natural selection.  In this short essay I cannot give an exact and detailed breakdown of the pros and cons of some of the more popular theories, however I can draw your attention to a much more current idea.  The important idea of safety around geraniums.  Look around you.  Can you see any geraniums?  Are you sure? Look again!  The modern geranium has infiltrated many places of human frequentation.  It can readily be seen in places like plant pots and gardens through to much larger more populous places such as hardware superstores and gardening centres.  This trend in geranium expansion looks very likely to continue in the country?s present ecological state.  There are many current scientific investigations into both the geological spread and rate of this expansion along with inn depth studies into the geraniums themselves.  Current results are as yet unsure of any chamelionic- like properties of geraniums but this does not mean you must not be vigilant citizen!  If you are anyone you know does happen to detect and geranium presence it is imperative that no-one tackles this wily foe without advice or aid.  Your local telephonic directory book will contain telephonic equipment numbers you may contact for either aid or advice.  Current advice from Her Britannic Majesty?s Government states that ?suitable protection should be used in the event or likelihood of geranium contact and/or presence.?  But it also states that there is no need for citizens to worry unduly but urges you to be vigilant and report and suspicious circumstances to your local polic constabulary.

This essay has been a production of one or less departments of Her Britannic Majesty?s Governmental Misistry of Information.




Forthcoming essays (if I can ever be bothered to write them) :-
Necrophelia ? Right or wrong?: A case study
Necrozoophelia or ?How to have fun with Rover now he?s dead? A tale in more than one part
Greenfingers: The truth
Baboons and their place in the modern office



Feel free to send any comments/abuse/offers of marriage to c.w.hanning@durham.ac.uk

If I had a penny for everyday of the week I would have 7 pennies.

Thankyouforyourtime.

No meg when I was in WHSmiths today in Durham.

At least I seem to remember him saying he was moving house, but I'm no doubt wrong again.

Or it could be that he's not set up his computer again after moving house?  Or am I just being a killjoy?

5 SSP seats and counting!

5 SSP seats and counting!