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Practise meditation, self-hypnosis and positive visualisation - which is what i did when fixing the doors onto Audis 200 times a day in Germany. 
Or just to what I did when i was a kitchen porter, and flick tofu cubes against the wall, pretending you're a giant splattering human brains satisfyingly against your cave. The sad thing was, my friend had the same job and taught me the trick.

Why do you do this to us, McMonagle? We're your internet friends - does that mean nothing?

A lot less nudity this time, I promise...   my kids want to show they teachers what i do, Im like....errrrr, maybe the next project

good to hear it's coming back though.

Cool. Why does he make me think of John Davison, the Scottish Tourette's guy?
Sorry, Si, you're miles handsomer and less sweary.

Typing on the shitter, in the bar I used to work in  Loadsa free booze. S'right

Heh. Glad I'm not the only one who posts here while rat-arsed. More than once I've had to nervously re-check the previous night's postings, peering through quaking fingers.

I was insulted to say the least when i expected some gratitude.The guy is a complete Tit and doesnt even realise it and it just amazes me how rude some people are and i was sick of him calling round to use my landline when he is one of those types who is too tight to pay for his own amongst other things.

I think the correct term is 'parasite'. There are plenty of them out there, sadly

I do Bujinkan, some of which involves samurai swords - slashing is used a fair bit, and I'm fairly sure that they would slice you fairly cleanly and deeply. But they are exceptionally sharp. What happened to Aimee Nixon's arm is very possible indeed.

It's the guns you want to watch out for, apparently:
http://www.cracked.com/article_18576_5-ridiculous-gun-myths-everyone-believes-thanks-to-movies.html

Looking forward to it - just had a squint at the website.

He also co-organises HiEx- The Highland International Comic Expo with his partner, the artist Vicky Stonebridge.

You learn something new every day. Always the last to know, that's me. [/midlands village]

EDIT: I know Rob Curley a bit too; nice chap from Sub City. Ace! 

Yeah... for the past four years or so!!

Come along to Octocon next month and I'll tell you all about it...

Might just do that - keep me posted!

That's the small village where we live. I must confess that I checkened out and turned back when we got to the deep water- I'm okay as long as I can see the bottom. But Bou, who took the pic, is made from sturdier stuff...

Cool! What was Bou doing with you? Have I missed the gossip? Do you live in Scotland now? Apologies, but I grew up in small-town midlands Ireland, and as such I must know about your personal life.  Tell me it.

Mog, missed the post where you explained why you were worrying - but best of luck, whatever it is you're getting checked.

Richmond, where's that? Looks ace. I love taking out my Lidl's finest inflatable motorized dinghy but never got much further than the river and canal in my own town.

Also I spent Sunday afternoon in the maternity hospital, checking out my formerly-borderline-racist mate's half-Japanese baby. Loverly.

She was Counciller Nyra Darn in Tour of Duty.

Wow, that's very cool. Must have a re-read and check out the good doctor.

Still deeply unhappy about my bit.... but what else could I do? No talent me.

Don't be silly - it was a touching, heartfelt and well-written letter and i have a feeling that the Big 'Tache appreciated it hugely.  I certainly would have if I was him.

3 things to say to the Doctor Alt 8:

1. Apologies for asking the mods to edit your post - clearly unnecessary. Seriously, sorry.

2. When did Carlos draw you into 2000ad?

3. It was me that said Carlos fancied you, not House of Usher. And quite frankly, the evidence is mounting.

peace

Nice work, Button. You're not just a pretty Microsoft Paint job.

(Ben Willsher's had me blubbing)

Yeah, i hear you.

I'm drunk. i went out to a gig, thankfully just round the corner from my house.  Met loads of people, had a great night  - but all i could think about was Supersquirrel Undefeated.

Once again:  Brilliant, Mark. Brilliant. The best thing I've ever seen on this board.