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Messages - Bongo Jack

#226
Film & TV / Re: "Y: The Last Man" Film
23 July, 2008, 09:09:52 PM
They lost me at 'Shia LaBeouf'.
#227
Games / Re: TOMB RAIDER: Underworld
21 July, 2008, 03:26:20 PM
That was Tomb Raider 2, but I think that came after some bonus final level or something that only comes up after you finish the game and go back to the level select menu - I think.  Been a while since I played that one all the way through, as the last levels have a definite hint of too much caffeine in the Eidos Production/Development Office's coffee machine.
#228
Film & TV / Re: Wall-E
21 July, 2008, 03:20:26 PM
I've never seen a lot of the other Pixar movies, so I'll be watching them off the strength of this one.
Except Invincibles, because John Byrne doesn't rate it much.
#229
Film & TV / Re: Dark Knight first 5 minutes...
20 July, 2008, 09:40:20 PM
Damn good film.  The fight in a multi-storey parking lot helps reinforce from the start that it's as far removed from the campy goth angst and plastic sets of the Burtons as possible.
Two Face seemed a bit out of nowhere and brief, but at least made sense as a genuine nutter, rather than someone adopting a motif so he could be a supervillain for no good reason other than he's in a superhero movie.  The third film, depressingly, looks like it'll have plot element #1 of almost every superhero movie ever made as its central storyline, which is a bit depressing given the good work on show here, and makes the ending a bit cliche, but the rest is pure fun.  The Hong Kong section was a bit James Bond, and the Batcycle does a nifty 180.  Not sure about the glowy eyes and Daredevil-vision, mind, but it doesn't spoil things.
#230
Games / Re: TOMB RAIDER: Underworld
20 July, 2008, 04:39:31 PM
Quote from: "Keef Monkey"There were a few points when the controls didn't seem up to the job though, Lara kept throwing herself any which way she fancied like a lemming with massive tits.

I had this problem with Anniversary myself, but didn't have similar problems with Legend, which is a shorter playing experience than Anniversary, but worth it for the later levels where the difficulty starts creeping upwards.
With Anniversary, I find that you have to stop dead and not push the controller in any direction for a second in order to let the controls realign themselves with the direction of the camera (the analogue directional controls being relative to the camera heading, but not switching over to a new heading if you're still holding in one direction as the camera swings around).
#231
Film & TV / Re: Wall-E
19 July, 2008, 08:07:18 PM
Seen it today.  Brilliant film, and so much going on, both visually and as backstory to the main plot - a lot of which the audience is left to figure out themselves, which I haven't seen in any family movie for quite a while.
I have only one criticism - the trailer that was shown beforehand was for one of those films which seems to think being African-American is inherently hilarious.  Everything after that was pure gravy, mind.
#232
Games / Re: TOMB RAIDER: Underworld
19 July, 2008, 07:51:57 PM
Pfft.  Go back to the past, grandad!

Hopefully Underworld will pick up the story where Legend left off, as I've been waiting to see how it pans out (although I suspect the female Arthurian analogue mentioned in Peru is Lara's mum).  For those who preferred the old-school games, Tomb Raider: Anniversary is a remake of the very first game, but with Legend's controls, graphics engine, and sufficiently tweaked level layouts and puzzles to qualify as a game in its own right.  I didn't replay it as much as Legend, all the same - the frustration from the touch-and-go controls and random success rate for some of the jumping puzzles was really annoying.

They should have remade Tomb Raider 3 - varied environments, the odd clever puzzle, and nowhere near as baffling as some of Tomb raider 2 (although TR2's Maria Doria levels remain one of my all-time fave game locales), and bitching Thing-homage on the Antarctica level.
#233
Film & TV / Re: Mutant Chronicles
18 July, 2008, 09:55:16 AM
Posting links to illegal content is a no-no.  You only compound the error by linking to terrible films like Mutant Chronicles.
Nice steampunk stylings (although if earth's resources are exhausted, how come they're burning so much coal?), but the story is Uwe Boll-levels of bad.
#234
Film & TV / Re: Watchmen Trailer now...
17 July, 2008, 10:59:57 PM
It looks like just another superhero movie to me.  The costumes, the grim stylings, the slo-mo fights - it's maybe an irony in itself that if it had stuck more closely to the look and style of the source material, it would be visually unique among the current crop of superhero movies.  As it is, I think anyone who hasn't some measure of love for the original will be heartily 'meh' by the trailer - what differentiates it from Iron Man, Dark Knight, Daredevil?
I also can't help but feel that the Smashing Pumpkins' theme from Batman And Robin - one of the most cliched and reviled comic-book movies of all time, featuring superheroes in rubber-armor suits and which placed stylistic trappings over story, characters, narrative sense, and hetrosexual main characters - is a poor choice of music for the first trailer the world will see for this film.
Perhaps it's a massive double-bluff by the makers to make everyone think we're getting another Batman And Robin when we'll get something truly great?  Can't help but feel that's just inviting trouble.

But hey, infinite universe, all things possible - no reason this will be another V For Vendetta.  Might be good.
#235
Film & TV / Re: Outlander Trailer
17 July, 2008, 07:15:16 PM
I think Christopher Lambert already did this.
Of course, it was complete poo (or on-par if you watch Lambert's movies in any kind of semi-regular capacity), so there's no reason not to do another Beowulf-In-Space.
#236
Nice.
I was never that great a fan of T2, and thought T3 was perfectly entertaining - not earth-shattering, but then I never expected it to be.
This looks cool.
#237
That's quite funny, but also something of a trend seems to be developing.
There's the whole Donna/Angel's son in that season finale when they took over the law firm storyline - not a million miles apart.  And anyone who's sat through Power Rangers In Space's season finale will find a few recognition buttons getting pushed between it and the last Who finale.  Ditto Torchwood S1 and Mystic Force's finales.
That's right - American telly people may have gone to such underhanded lengths as doing it several years ago in a children's programme to disguise the fact, but it's clear to me that they've simply stolen ideas wholesale from the most original television writer currently working today.
If only RTD would bring out a book dedicated to how superb and original his ideas are.
That would be brilliant, wouldn't it?
#238
Film & TV / Re: Wanted trailer (Russian)
17 July, 2008, 04:10:37 PM
It was all right.  Unsurprisingly, the ending from the comic was missing, but then there's no real way to replicate the comic's ending in a movie.

Mr Fuck-You:  Yeah, that's right - I've just raped a woman after killing a police station and then telling the burning pile of bricks to go fuck itself - what have you done today?
Reader: (thinks for five seconds) I got up at one in the afternoon, had a dump while rubbing one out to the hot Olsen twin, then watched Jeremy Kyle.  Being a real person and not a fictional character written by a man who has to shit in a bag, this means I've actually done considerably more than you have.  (puts down Wanted, picks up Ultimates) LOL!  "Stands for France!" indeed!

Loved the mental train chase, but I'm not sure about McAvoy.  No real objections, per se, he just didn't seem particularly convincing to me - although since it's a ludicrous film-universe the movie inhabits, perhaps I'm missing the point.
In a similar vein, here's the trailer for Punisher: War Zone starring Titus Pullo from Rome http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=4qttbpPvOwI
For some reason, I found myself laughing through the trailer, but I'll go see it anyway.
#239
Film & TV / Re: REVIEW 4by4
17 July, 2008, 02:06:46 PM
You might want to insist on spoiler tags for MGS4.  There's some stuff people who haven't played it all the way through might not want to know up front.
Haven't seen Indy 4 yet, as we 180'd once we saw the huge crowd of chav scum waiting to get into it and decided it's worth waiting for the dvd release when we can turn off the running commentary.  I was surprised I'm not the only person who'll not bother with a film if the crowd is too large and guaranteed to contain some budding Oscar Wildes...
I liked Rambo 4 - the action scenes weren't shot in that pseudo-documentary style they shoot everything from kung-fu to Battlestar vs Cylon Baseships in these days (presumeably because they want you thinking you're watching a documentary about robot aliens, rather than a television entertainment where you can tell what the fuck's going on).  Plus the World's Largest Claymore, complete with mushroom cloud, was a hoot - and jeep-mounted cannon FTW.
Die Hard 4 was alright, but suffered from comedy-sidekick facepunchittis, in that there was a character shoehorned in for no other reason than to spare loud, obnoxious twats from making unfunny comments all the way through the movie because there's someone onscreen doing it for them who equally needs a punch in the face.
MGS4 has top robot action and some funny trimmings.  Good fun.
#240
2000ad does that all the time, be it in Dreddworld one-off classics like the Snozzbournes, or those old reader art things they don't do anymore.
I'm sure whatever you want to try is fine, as the actual compo theme is usually quite a loose brief.