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A debate on the pros and cons of circular vs. flat knitting needles often resulted in physical conflict at the annual Knitting Con:

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:: "So we're not allowed an opinion ... Fuck off."

Of course "we" are, and that was just my opinion.  Fuck off yourself.

Welcome to the "another opportunity to bash Langley" thread.  Yes, that's right, sports fans, Langley Bashing (now recognised as an olympic event) is reaching all new highs of stagnation this week with hardly any new criticisms at all.  It's very much whatever worked last season, with only thinly veiled improvements on old favourites such as the photoshop-dig and the classic just doesn't look right.

Some surprise here though, that the use of flame-effects haven't been targeted directly, but there's still time for someone to bring up the rear with some kind of "sick and tired of flaming photoshoppery" comment.

In fact the only thing that marks this mountain of criticism apart from similar mountains that erupt whenever Langley draws anything in 2000AD is the unfair comparison to the completely different style of Dom Reardon.

Join us next time, sports fans, for (let's face it) a lot more of the same.

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Re-enact the entire run of The Red Seas.

You will need:
- a two-headed dog and a large goldfish bowl
- lots of make up
- pirate costumes
- a good memory
- a giant statue (or some stilts)
- an enormous crustacean
- some harpies

doggy carrots - they said they didn't want to be arrested - which puts my "prostitute yourselves" idea right out the window.

:: "Shut the f**k up and eat this you wanker"

It was worth repeating.

Is there any surrounding lyrics that may give a clue as to the motives here, Larf?

Does the guy want to rob him or kill him?

It is just possible that he is desperate for food and is after a "A green, oddly shaped, foul tasting vegatable.  A favourate among those who like cabbages."

Revised #2

:: "one in the chamber, the safety off release, straight at your dome homes, i wanna see cabbage."

"There is a bullet in the firing chamber of my gun, and the safety feature of said gun has been switched to the off position. I am threatening to fire a bullet directly towards your cranium, sir, as I surmise that this may result in the need for a coronary artery bypass graft."

According to urban dictionary, cabbage is...

"Ghetto slang for a coronary artery bypass graft (CABG), a common surgery for those who have suffered a heart attack or have certain chronic cardiac defects."

Mike: "Ni'a I'm gonna blast my gat and it's gonna fuck you up so bad the ER doctors are gonna have to do a double-cabbage on yo' bitch ass."

[Revised]

Revised

:: "one in the chamber, the safety off release, straight at your dome homes, i wanna see cabbage."

"There is a bullet in the firing chamber of my gun, and the safety feature of said gun has been switched to the off position. I am threatening to fire a bullet directly towards your cranium, sir, unless you give me all your money."

[According to urban dictionary, cabbage is hiphop for money.]

:: "one in the chamber, the safety off release, straight at your dome homes, i wanna see cabbage."

"There is a bullet in the firing chamber of my gun, and the safety feature of said gun has been switched to the off position.  I am threatening to fire a bullet directly towards your cranium, sir, as I wish to see your brains."

[Given the rather wild contextual assumption that 'cabbage' is a metaphor for brains.]

Sin City was bloody good, yes.  I'd forgotten about that.  The threat looms on the horizon, but never really gets to the city.  With Total War, the threat dents the city, but doesn't overpower it.

With the short-lived City Of The Damned, Necropolis, the Nero Narcos thing and Judgement Day, the city is always completely overpowered for a short time.  All very samey, really, in terms of the overall structure (as has been pointed out).  You just swap who invades, which long-standing characters get offed and who teams up with Dredd for the re-take.

The Pit was the first epic since The Apocalypse War that wasn't trying to outdo it.

Total War is the most original Mini-Mega-Epic since The Pit.

Just remembered - they made a HUGE song and dance about O'Neill coming back to draw the last ever episode of Nemesis The Warlock, where the entire series up until that point had been drawn in a homage-to-O'Neill style by another artist (was it Henry Flint?)

Anyway, like I say, a huge build up, loads of hype and then the end result was pretty shit, truth be told.  It was as if O'Neill just couldn't be arsed to do it properly, and given that he's still a complete art-God, there must be some explanation as to why it was so poor.

Well, it was only a matter of time before Tharg's Illustrious Organ inserted itself here, and I should have seen it coming.

Hopefully it's something that Tharg will drop soon as I think he's been playing with it for too long.

I'll try not to let criticism of his organ come out of my mouth quite so strongly.

etc.