Can you do my job for me?

[skurvy]

I have to think of some alternative uses for our company's branded pen pot.

The pen pot is basically just a cardboard tube (hexagonal rather than circular tube) with a false bottom that sits on your desk and you can put pens in it. It's an annual promotional gift for our company, it has the company name and logo and a calendar running around the outside (great gift eh?).

I'm trying to add a bit of fun to it this year by including alternative uses for it as part of the overall design in a sort of Viz Top-Tips rip-off (I'll probably illustrate 6 of them).

Any help is greatly appreciated as I can't be arse to do it myself.

Eg. Add extra holes in the side panels to poke your pens in, get a bag of marbles and you have created your own Ker-plunk!  game.

[Floyd-the-k]

attach it to your head with a rubber band to make a very small fez

put it someone else`s desk, then remove it after they`ve filled it with pens

look thoughtful next to it and tell people you`re `thinking outside the box`
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[skurvy]

Excellent, a pen thiefing device.

And in fact the 'thinking outside the box' is ideal, it's a term used so much in this industry that I'd love to take the piss out of it.

Place a piece of paper of the top and secure it tightly with an elastic band.  Hey presto a bongo drum for a cat!

[Wils]

Disposable speculum?
"Every office and orifice should have one!"

Penile Exo-Skeleton?

A temporary prosthesis for *very* small amputees?


;)

[Dudley]

Cut off the bottom for a unique set of corporate pan-pipes.

[Dunk!]

Attach two together with a length of string through the bottom and experience sending and receiving voice messages over a small to middling distance.

[LARF]

a pastry cutter

a hat box for a small person with a tall head

a cardboard nut wrench for cardboard nuts

a dogs tail protector

a robot finger puppet

a giant pencil top for a giant pencil

[Mikey]

a cardboard nut wrench for cardboard nuts

GOLD!

Collect a bunch of them together to make a cardboard hive for cardboard bees!

M

[El Spurioso]

Use it as a Rook on an oversized cardboard Chess set?

Paint it grey and install it in your child's dolls-house as a fashionable yet politically incorrect elephant's-foot umbrella stand?

Heat-insulation for a very small cup of starbucks coffee?

A pet?

[Dunk!]

Put it on the end of your hand and pull your sleeve over it to create hilarious "Look I've got no hand" scenarios, the addition of a picture hook on the bottom means Pirate shenanigans a plenty.

Arr!

[Mikey]

Use them to prop up flat objects,just like the classical architects of old!Although not as high

[Mikey]

No!I've got it!

Paint them black and create a table top Giants Causeway!

M.

[skurvy]

Attach two together with a length of string through the bottom and experience sending and receiving voice messages over a small to middling distance.

Like it - did this ever actually work when you did it with tin cans?

I'd thought of the cardboard hive too and the cardboard wrench is fantastic.

A cardboard condom for a very wierd penis? (Although if it split you'd have a baby with a hexagonal cardboard head)

[skurvy]

This is all good stuff, a desktop giants causeway for midgets would be fantastic!

[LARF]

For Him

1. Measure the circumference of your hips, across your buttocks and around to your private parts. Cut a piece of elastic to this length. Cut a small hole in either side of the open end of the tube and tie each end of the elastic in a loop attached to the tube. pierce a small hole in the bottom.

2. Get pissed as a fart, get undressed and attach the above around your buttocks and place your manhood inside and set your alarm for 4.00am. When the alarm goes off go to the toilet and aim percy at the porcelin.

3. Alternatively instead of cutting a hole in the end you could draw a face on the bottom (you could let the kids get involved and draw daddy). Then surprise the wife with your man on a space hopper impression on a sunday morning by dancing naked, with it attached in front of her face to wake her up with a smile.

4. Emergency answering the door starkers to the postman when collecting a parcel device?

FOR HER

A fifty pence piece holder?