Spider-Man's Greatest Bible Stories!

[Noisybast]

Pure class in a radioactive glass...

Link: http://portlandmercury.com/2002-05-02/feature4.html" target="_blank">Thwipp here!

[Roger Godpleton]

Blasphemy is never funny.

[Noisybast]

Explain Life of Brian then...

[Richmond Clements]

Don't talk shit Krusty.
It's bloody great.

[Mike Carroll]

That's the best thing I've seen in ages!

[SimonC]

Genius

Nuff said

[Trout]

BWAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

[Matt Timson]

Pfff...  No where *near* as funny as this

Link: http://www.kontrabandcontent.co.uk/1/graphics/pics/spiderman_comic_hero.jpg" target="_blank">I'm going to punch you in your face!

[WoD]

that's funny...damn funny...

[SamuelAWilkinson]

"Say, if it isn't my old nemesis... a truck!"


Teary-eyed, crying with laughter brilliance.

[Adrian Bamforth]

Controvery over Messiah ? insect claim.

Archaeologists have reportedly unearthed previously unseen scrolls hidden in a cave near Galilee suggesting Jesus' powers may have derived not from God but from the bite of a radioactive daddy longlegs.

The documents referred to as "The Daddy Longlegs Scrolls" are causing concern in ecclesiastic circles, claiming the messiah was attacked by the insect during one of his long strolls in the desert in his youth.

Scientists believe the strong thermal currents in the region occasionally send the insects high above the Earth?s ozone layer where they are not protected from the sun's radiation, resulting in them absorbing powerful rays.

Entomologists confirm that the insects, otherwise known as harvestman (order Phalangida) display many of the traits the saviour later demonstrated as recorded in the Gospels. "It is well known that Daddy longlegs display the ability to walk across the surface of water, much like the common pond-skater" says entomologist Professor Eugene Faulks. "They are also great healers since their blood-sucking prevents infection, leaving them only second to leaches in their usefulness to modern medicine."

"Any schoolboy will tell you they are very resilient and can fly away even after their legs have been pulled off and any other animal would surely be dead, which could explain the miracle of the resurrection as described in The Bible. As for other abilities, we can only imagine what one is capable of after being exposed to radioactive rays."

The Vatican remains quiet on the issue releasing only the following statement: "It is our belief that these documents are clearly forgeries contrived by 14th century insect farmers keen to promote insect use. The Catholic Church steadfastly stands by the notion that Jesus was not bitten by a radioactive daddy longlegs."