I don't understand the appeal of...

[Noisybast]

Hmm. Our town has a guy who walks around perpetually in a really ridiculous looking top hat, with massive muttonchops that make him look like a monkey.

I don't understand the appeal of such flamboyant individualism. Especially given that the guy must be pushing 60.

I say more power to him. I sincerely hope that I'll stand out from the flat cap brigade when I'm a codger.

[I, Cosh]

Today's mid-afternoon snack was a sausage roll and a fudge doughnut from Greggs. Fucking marvellous!

[Mike Gloady]

I don't understand the appeal of .... wait for it....

Children.

By which I mean having your own.  I love my neices and nephews loads (2 of each, my brother making up for my complete lack of interest in the whole reproduction affair).  I'm not saying there's anything worng with them or anyone's kids, I'm just not up for having any myself.  Had huge fun playing with them this afternoon, but then I don't have to discipline them and can go home after three hours and take some headache pills.

Sorry if that's controversial.

Something else, on a related point, is I don't understand why people think that asking you why you haven't GOT any kids is remotely acceptable.  There could be any number of reasons, from just not wanting any (like me) through medical reassons (which themselves could be many and varied).  It's precisely none of anyone's business why I don't bloody have kids at 35, just as I wouldn't dream of asking anyone why they WANTED kids in the first place. 

It's also, for some reason, incredibly popular to ask me why I don't really drink (mum's funeral and one night out the other week being the only exceptions in something approaching four years.  That's none of your bloody business either.  Especially when you ask "did you used to be an alcoholic?"  No.  Seriously.  Fuck.  Right.  Off.

Phew.

Feel better now.

[wild-seven]

I'm SO pleased you said that, as a girl I'm supposed to have an all-consuming desire to own some little bastards anklebiters. Well guess what? I don't - I too have had people referring to 'when you'll have some', but the pleasure is mine because I get to tell them how I CAN'T. I leave out that I'm pleased...

[Christov]

It's perfectly normal to not want children. They're a hassle, a drain on money and resources, and will most likely hate you before they're 16.

That said, I myself do have the desire to pass on my genetic material for two reasons, the first being that I absolutely must pass on my fantastic jawline (Dredd fans, be still your beating hearts), and the second is that I'd like to do a better job of raising children than my parents did me.

It... um... boils down to a 'anything you can do, I can do better' schtick at first glance I'll admit, but I want to avoid the whole 'I'm far too busy for children, instead I'll work myself into a wreck and have sex with the office staff' thing my dad did, and hopefully whomever I spawn with will avoid the 'I'm your mum so I'm allowed to breathe down your neck and be invasive all the time' thing my mother does.

Hope for the best, children are our future, teach the world to sing, etc...

[HdE]

Hmm. Our town has a guy who walks around perpetually in a really ridiculous looking top hat, with massive muttonchops that make him look like a monkey.

I don't understand the appeal of such flamboyant individualism. Especially given that the guy must be pushing 60.

I say more power to him. I sincerely hope that I'll stand out from the flat cap brigade when I'm a codger.

I'd be inclined to be more charitable about this if the guy wasn't a complete scumbag.

I'm not really a grumpy old man - I don't mind people dressing like lunatics if they're nice lunatics

[wild-seven]

Trick or Treating: let's face it, it's door to door begging, I wouldn't give you a fun sized mars bar the rest of the year so why the fudge would I do it tonight?

[Mike Gloady]

Tell me about it.  I had eight trick or treaters from the Cradlegrave estate earlier tonight.  All teenage (with three little brats, oh how CLASSY, you're a TEENAGE PARENT?  WHAT A SURPRISE!!!!).  Violent, agressive, abusive morons.  The police were called. 

The next time anyone (except Steev 'cos he's a goth and it's his religion) says that Hallowe'en is a "bit of a laugh" I may have to punch them right in the cock.  Hallowe'en - don't understand the appeal.

[COMMANDO FORCES]

I have three chickens Mike

[Mike Gloady]

Chickens?

[COMMANDO FORCES]

Well you said you'd punch people right on their cock.

Here they are

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAsqDIfFcLU

[Peter Wolf]

After reading this thread Halloween and trick or treating seems to be a good or a bad thing depending on where you live.

I used to do this when i was at a certain age but it was limited to the road i lived in and nowhere else and since everyone who lived in my street knew each other more or less it was never a problem and i grew out of doing it by about 13 - 14.It was also part of the build up to the neighbourhoods bonfire night celebrations held in the woods .No fireworks but just a massive bonfire and a barbeque

Shame so many have had negative experiences of it.

[Mike Gloady]

Quite.  I'm not averse to either chickens or kids, I just don't want one of my own (either).  Unless roasted.  Mmmmmm.  Roast Chicken is joyous.  Just had a roast.  Happy.

I've never cooked a child.

[Mike Gloady]

Can I just say, I will never punch a chicken. 

I feel such a bastard having to make that EXPLICIT.  But I want it clearly understood.

I will never punch CF on any of his three cocks. 

[COMMANDO FORCES]

Thank you, Gladys, Elsie and Crystal will be happy to hear that