My five-page promo comic (critiques welcome)

[RossBam]

Hi -
this is my five page promo for a graphic novel story, The Green Man - expanded from a short story I wrote a few years ago.

after trying to write a couple novels I have recently came to the conclusion I don't have the talent or the inclination to finish a decent one, but have re-discovered drawing (although my skill nothing like some of what I've seen here). This is one of my first posts and thought it best to hit the ground running with sharing my artwork

This sets out the main characters, and doesn't have much in the way of action or two-way dialogue, but is a series of monologues by the main characters detailing their point of view in the plot without giving anything away.

They need a clean-up as were all done by hand, and colour is on the way for all but the first page, but please take a look, any feedback welcome!

Ross

[RossBam]

final two pages

[Bluecube]

I can't comment on your writing abilities as I can't read the text on my screen but your artwork is a damn sight better than what you think. If I could draw like that then I'd be a happy man!

[RossBam]

Thanks!

Re the illegible writing, full-res scans are on my deviantart page:

http://nemesisbeast.deviantart.com/gallery/31092167

[CrazyFoxMachine]

Really like the perspective on the spaceship on that last page.

[Alski]

Okay...

I haven't the foggiest what is going on. The writing is very stale and monotonous, and the story, whatever it is, did not draw me in.

The art is passable, and like Foxy says the spaceship was cool. Your character work is rather patchy, though, and although you could do some self published work it's not up to scratch for the bigger boys.

Maybe you should have a go at a shorter, simpler narrative to get yourself going, not launch into a big, complex story straight away.

Sorry to be negative, but it is all my own opinion.

[RossBam]

Thanks for the feedback !

Don't worry I'm not labouring under the impression that this will be published at all.

As early as I am into this, I'm happy to take 'passable' as a compliment.