FLYING BLIND ON A ROCKET CYCLE!!??!!

[Proudhuff]

Eliza and Ezra rolled together into the one giggling snowball of full-figured copulation, screaming and shouting as they playfully bit and pulled at each other in a dangerous and clamorous rollercoaster coil of sexually violent rotation with Eliza's breasts barrel-rolled across Ezra's howling mouth and the pained frenzy of his bulbous salutation extenuating his excitement as it smacked its way into every muscle of Eliza's body except for the otherwise central zone.

This should be read in an Alan Bennett voice. 

[Dandontdare]

to be fair it wasn't only the Guardian - I don't think it's had any positive reviews, and the excerpts I've seen explain why!

[Fungus]

Picked this up in Waterstone's the other day and a quick flick had me wondering if this was kosher, perhaps I was being stitched up (those CCTV's get everywhere). Whatever happened to our Morrissey ?