Why would a married man who has had a vasectomy need condom's ?
...because they are ribbed for her pleasure ! :o
Are you coming on to us, Klute?
Well, you may need to use them until you have a follow-up sperm count that reads zero. This can take months. Also if either partner is/has played around either with/without each other's consent, they may make good sense until an STD test can be arranged.
The luminous ones can be useful in a powercut.
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 22 May, 2012, 11:16:04 PM
Are you coming on to us, Klute?
THAT'S WHAT YOU USE THEM TO NOT FOR.
Are they luminous and are they dressed as Darth Vader?
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 May, 2012, 11:17:23 PM
Well, you may need to use them until you have a follow-up sperm count that reads zero. This can take months.
Of course it did, darling.
Because his wife has an STD. Or he does. Old infections can flare up, so nothing sinister.
(Or is it a joke?
"I don't know, why would married man with a vaectomy use condoms?")
Tidiness?
Maybe he just likes the taste?
It's entirely possible for blood to blood transmission to occur during anal sex.
Don't forget about Poopnoodle as well.
Waterballoons?
Remember when this board was about comics? Me neither.
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 23 May, 2012, 12:02:51 AM
Remember when this board was about comics? Me neither.
The stated purpose of this sub-forum:
QuoteHelp!: Stuck in a wormhole? Angel Delight won't set? Just woken up and don't know which year it is? Ask away!
Blame Tharg!
Apparently these are natural formations:
(http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/17nfzc7ozf2b1jpg/original.jpg)
Welcome to Fassbender Valley.
Quote from: klute on 22 May, 2012, 11:02:22 PM
Why would a married man who has had a vasectomy need condom's ?
Because it's less messy that way?
By the way, top thread! My two favourite responses are Dracula 1's and Dark Jimbo's. But they are all good.
Quote from: JOE SOAP on 23 May, 2012, 12:14:34 AM
Apparently these are natural formations:
I know, I've been there and have hundreds of photographs of "cock rocks."
Quote from: Emperor on 23 May, 2012, 04:02:37 AM
I've been there and have hundreds of photographs of "cock rocks."
Is it like Mecca to your people?
Water Bombs.
Its bad enough getting hit with a water bomb, but when you look at your shoulder and find a soggy johnny on it, its 19 times worse
Quote from: SpetsnaZ99 on 23 May, 2012, 07:47:21 AM
Water Bombs.
Its bad enough getting hit with a water bomb, but when you look at your shoulder and find a soggy johnny on it, its 19 times worse
and it smells of piss
Because it's raining and you want it to stay dry
But if you put them over your're head then you'll will suffocate.
Because he likes to visit prostitutes and I'll he'll be damned if he's trusting the cheap & nasty ones they use.
Quote from: TordelBack on 22 May, 2012, 11:17:23 PM
Well, you may need to use them until you have a follow-up sperm count that reads zero. This can take months. Also if either partner is/has played around either with/without each other's consent, they may make good sense until an STD test can be arranged.
The luminous ones can be useful in a powercut.
The married man had them/used them for atleast 33 years he was married the question has come about due to only being able to think of untoward reasons and really i was looking for maybe a not so sinister reason for having them bar the fact other evidence would suggest more towards the untoward reasons
I *think* there are different sorts of vasectomy (some more permanent than others) and *think* that you now have to sign a disclaimer that if it doesn't work you wont sue the hospital. Or go fucking mental at the wife.
Maybe he just really didn't trust the NHS and really, REALLY didnt want more kids?
Quote from: Satanist on 23 May, 2012, 03:24:57 PM
I *think* there are different sorts of vasectomy (some more permanent than others) and *think* that you now have to sign a disclaimer that if it doesn't work you wont sue the hospital. Or go fucking mental at the wife.
Maybe he just really didn't trust the NHS and really, REALLY didnt want more kids?
You can tell Satanist works at RELATE can't you?
Quote from: klute on 23 May, 2012, 02:24:14 PM
The married man had them/used them for atleast 33 years he was married the question has come about due to only being able to think of untoward reasons and really i was looking for maybe a not so sinister reason for having them bar the fact other evidence would suggest more towards the untoward reasons
Ah, now it becomes clearer! I thought the guy who'd had the vasectomy was *you* and that the operation came with a three-month supply of condoms as insurance.
Maybe the answer really is 'because unprotected sex is icky.' Sleeping on the damp patch, and all that.
Quote from: House of Usher on 25 May, 2012, 01:28:13 PM
Ah, now it becomes clearer! I thought the guy who'd had the vasectomy was *you* and that the operation came with a three-month supply of condoms as insurance.
see that's why you're a gentleman and I'm a cynic. I also assumed it was Klute, but assumed he was touting for plausible excuses 'cos he'd been caught out! :-[
Quote from: Dandontdare on 25 May, 2012, 01:55:08 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 25 May, 2012, 01:28:13 PM
Ah, now it becomes clearer! I thought the guy who'd had the vasectomy was *you* and that the operation came with a three-month supply of condoms as insurance.
see that's why you're a gentleman and I'm a cynic. I also assumed it was Klute, but assumed he was touting for plausible excuses 'cos he'd been caught out! :-[
and a comic geek site is just the place to come for advice?
This is the only time the advice of 'have you tried cheese?' maybe relevant.
Quote from: Dandontdare on 25 May, 2012, 01:55:08 PM
Quote from: House of Usher on 25 May, 2012, 01:28:13 PM
Ah, now it becomes clearer! I thought the guy who'd had the vasectomy was *you* and that the operation came with a three-month supply of condoms as insurance.
see that's why you're a gentleman and I'm a cynic. I also assumed it was Klute, but assumed he was touting for plausible excuses 'cos he'd been caught out! :-[
Lol not me i'm a happily married man (if there's such a thing) with a wife who want's more kid's and doesn't like the things anyway
Perhaps he and his wife have an open relationship* as long as they don't bring anything home - the vasectomy sorts out the baby angle and the johnnies cover the STD one.
Or he is a good friend who has back-up rubbers in case a friend is in need.
Or perhaps they are left over noddies from before the op - it is the saddest thing in the world to throw them away, especially when they are long passed their use by date :(
Perhaps a better question might be: Why were you rummaging around in his belongings? ;)
* It's more common that people think. Apparently. I read about it in the paper.
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 May, 2012, 07:10:55 AM
Quote from: Emperor on 23 May, 2012, 04:02:37 AM
I've been there and have hundreds of photographs of "cock rocks."
Is it like Mecca to your people?
We worship the world's omni-penii. As well as its multi-minge. Valiantly rogering the sky, whilst being made moist by the surging rovers.
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 May, 2012, 12:13:09 AM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 23 May, 2012, 12:02:51 AM
Remember when this board was about comics? Me neither.
The stated purpose of this sub-forum:
QuoteHelp!: Stuck in a wormhole? Angel Delight won't set? Just woken up and don't know which year it is? Ask away!
Blame Tharg!
Have we ever resolved the Angel Delight question? Everytime I see it I think I'd like to give it another spin as I loved it when I was a kid (I called it Blum Blum) but if there is an issue with getting it to set I'm not sure I can be arsed with it.
I think once you've put too much milk in it, it's too late. The answer is to follow the instructions on the packet, then stick in in the fridge.
Quote from: House of Usher on 25 May, 2012, 05:27:03 PM
I think once you've put too much milk in it, it's too late. The answer is to follow the instructions on the packet, then stick in in the fridge.
Crumbs, I thought this was still condom related talk. :o
Quote from: Emperor on 25 May, 2012, 05:08:59 PM
Perhaps he and his wife have an open relationship* as long as they don't bring anything home - the vasectomy sorts out the baby angle and the johnnies cover the STD one.
Or he is a good friend who has back-up rubbers in case a friend is in need.
Or perhaps they are left over noddies from before the op - it is the saddest thing in the world to throw them away, especially when they are long passed their use by date :(
Perhaps a better question might be: Why were you rummaging around in his belongings? ;)
* It's more common that people think. Apparently. I read about it in the paper.
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 May, 2012, 07:10:55 AM
Quote from: Emperor on 23 May, 2012, 04:02:37 AM
I've been there and have hundreds of photographs of "cock rocks."
Is it like Mecca to your people?
We worship the world's omni-penii. As well as its multi-minge. Valiantly rogering the sky, whilst being made moist by the surging rovers.
Quote from: TordelBack on 23 May, 2012, 12:13:09 AM
Quote from: Dark Jimbo on 23 May, 2012, 12:02:51 AM
Remember when this board was about comics? Me neither.
The stated purpose of this sub-forum:
QuoteHelp!: Stuck in a wormhole? Angel Delight won't set? Just woken up and don't know which year it is? Ask away!
Blame Tharg!
Have we ever resolved the Angel Delight question? Everytime I see it I think I'd like to give it another spin as I loved it when I was a kid (I called it Blum Blum) but if there is an issue with getting it to set I'm not sure I can be arsed with it.
I meant to add the question came about via the women talking my wife then came home and asked why would a married man? and it sort of snowballed from there
This may be a leftfield suggestion but you could just ask him directly, as it sounds like the rumor mill may be gathering a difficult head of steam.
It sounds like he's shagging someone, though if he's smart he'll claim the condoms were someone else's, like a younger relative who's secretly gay or something and he's hiding the evidence from homophobic parents - from zero to hero!
They make your mickey looks more handsomer.
I guess there's actually no arguing with that.
This married man with the johnnies... Does he also have a well-worn passport and spend a lot of time in the loo? Is he regularly flush with cash after disappearing for yet another short trip away? Hey, I'm not judging. In fact, I'd appreciate being PM'd his number. I could do with a few extra quid and some travel myself, and putting "Drug Mule" on my CV can't hurt for getting it actually read more often.
I'm betting the answer has something to do with bumsex girl.
Quote from: Emperor on 25 May, 2012, 05:29:08 PM
Crumbs, I thought this was still condom related talk. :o
If you're putting crumbs in your Angel Delight, then no wonder its not setting......
Quote from: Trout on 26 May, 2012, 03:15:50 AM
I'm betting the answer has something to do with bumsex girl.
I'd forgotted about her, how did that all end?
Quote from: Professah Byah on 25 May, 2012, 06:24:23 PM
It sounds like he's shagging someone, though if he's smart he'll claim the condoms were someone else's, like a younger relative who's secretly gay or something and he's hiding the evidence from homophobic parents - from zero to hero!
Those condoms were only resting in my account.
Can't use condoms, passion killers for me. The withdraw method works for me or just were out your partner before you need [spoiler]to cum then empty all over her,[/spoiler] also works for me.
V
Quote from: vzzbux on 26 May, 2012, 10:23:43 PM
Can't use condoms, passion killers for me. The withdraw method works for me or just wear out your partner before you need to cum then empty all over her; also works for me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poALqoNvcNA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poALqoNvcNA)
Quote from: bikini kill on 27 May, 2012, 09:51:15 AM
Quote from: vzzbux on 26 May, 2012, 10:23:43 PM
Can't use condoms, passion killers for me. The withdraw method works for me or just wear out your partner before you need to cum then empty all over her; also works for me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poALqoNvcNA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poALqoNvcNA)
I was hoping that was a clip of Billy Connolly talking about the rhythm method.
I thought the sentiment
Quote from: bikini kill on 27 May, 2012, 09:51:15 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poALqoNvcNA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poALqoNvcNA)
was quite funny though.
Quote from: House of Usher on 27 May, 2012, 10:58:08 PM
All of you are worms beneath my mighty spats. I am free to do whatever I want as I have the power of a God and all of you are so much chattel for me to step over. I will not wear condoms when I jizz in your're hair and even if I did the raw majesty of David Knight's Sperm would simply melt through its's pitiful latex restraints.
I AM THE MOD AND I RULE YOU LIKE A GOD. I DON'T ANSWER TO ANYONE AS I AM COMPLETELY UNACCOUNTABLE AND I ABUSE MY POWER ALL THE TIME. (BECAUSE EMPEROR LETS ME)
Do you have a specific complaint to make, Roger? There are channels, you know.
I'm tired of you and the other mods using this forum as a front for your cough syrup organization. I won't be paid off to be your goddamn patsy. I'm bringing a knife to a knife fight. THAT'S THE CHICAGO WAY
Either lots of posts have been removed or I have no fucking idea what is going on in this thread anymore.................
I think that's at least five minutes of my life wasted or corrupted, I'm not sure which!
One day soon, there will be a reckoning. Either Roger will become a mod or he will get a big spanking. :lol:
Quote from: Trout on 28 May, 2012, 05:22:54 PM
One day soon, there will be a reckoning. Either Roger will become a mod or he will get a big spanking. :lol:
The naughty step beckons, i think
I have the utmost respect for the other mods and I think they do a fine job.
Quote from: Roger Godpleton on 28 May, 2012, 11:55:47 PM
I have the utmost respect for the other mods and I think they do a fine job.
So youre not a Rocker then..... :lol:
Quote from: Rod the Oddly-Shod Sod of a Mod on Tuesday 1977-ish
I have the utmost respect for the other mods but, fuck it, I was in The Faces as well. Uuuurrrrp.
If course if this gentleman worked in special effects well they use condoms to simulate gunshots. You put a small quanity of fake blood inside the condom, then attach a very small explosive. This is then attached to the "victim" the explosion is triggered remotly at the right time and hey presto.... gunshot wound.
Quote from: The Doctor Alt 8 on 07 July, 2012, 04:23:26 PM
If course if this gentleman worked in special effects well they use condoms to simulate gunshots. You put a small quanity of fake blood inside the condom, then attach a very small explosive. This is then attached to the "victim" the explosion is triggered remotly at the right time and hey presto.... gunshot wound.
Best post for months.
Off-topic, messy, geeky and slightly mental. Nice work, Roberta!
Takes a bow...
:D
True story
Special effects guy took a several boxes of condoms home for work,
On the Monday he returns to the supplier.
"OI, there was only 46 condoms in the last box!"
Assistant. "Well I hope it didn't spoil your weekend too much sir!"